Creative Loafing Tampa — December 16, 2021

$FREE • DECEMBER 16-22, 2021 (VOL.34, NO.50) CREATIVE LOAFING • CLTAMPA.COM

TAMPA'S ICONIC

CLOSES

WORKERS REMINISCE AND WONDER WHAT'S NEXT

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o d s u t e L g n i k o o c the OR

e h t g n i r B ! u o y o t Bus Contact your local location for more information.

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PUBLISHER James Howard EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf STAFF WRITER Justin Garcia

TAMPAFIRERESCUE/TWITTER

FOOD and THEATER CRITIC Jon Palmer Claridge FILM & TV CRITIC John Allman IN-HOUSE WITCH Caroline DeBruhl CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Stephanie Powers, Dan Savage, Eric Snider

ory

PHOTOGRAPHERS Dave Decker

EDITORIAL INTERN Apply for fall via rroa@cltampa.com

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CREATIVE DIRECTOR Jack Spatafora

SeaWorld in February, animal rights ILLUSTRATORS Newton, Dan Perkins, claiming the practice ofJoe keeping wild Cory Robinson d dangerous. But even though public atmany SeaWorld in animal rights SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES don’t seeFebruary, a parallel between the kind claiming the practice of keeping wildZepeda Anthony Scott k, and the practice of Carbone, displaying animals nd dangerous. evenOr though publicfor a asking for tooBut much? is it time MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND d, many don’t see a parallel between the kind t” animals?

EVENTS DIRECTOR

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ck and the practice of displaying animals Alexis Quinn Chamberlain s asking for too much? Or is it time for a MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND ent” animals?

We should be treating them better.

EVENTS COORDINATOR Lauren Caplinger

City Council surprised to hear about pension and injury pay woes at Tampa Fire Department, p. 11.

EUCLID MEDIA GROUP

Music: Tampa Bay BluesOFFICER Fest ...........................

40 CHIEF EXECUTIVE Andrew Zelman

CHIEF OPERATING OFFICERS 42 Music Week ...................................................

Chris Keating, Michael Wagner VP OF DIGITAL SERVICES Stacy Volhein Music Week ...................................................

42 The List ..........................................................

46 DIGITAL OPERATIONS COORDINATOR Concert review: Artic Monkeys .......................... 42 Jaime Monzon Movie reviews .....................................................

63 Music: Tampa Fest ...........................

Concert review:Bay ArticBlues Monkeys ..........................40 42

euclidmediagroup.com cltampa.com Free Will Astrology......................................... 64 Savage Love ......................................................

69 cldeals.com Puzzler ........................................................... 66 clspace.com Savage Love ...................................................... 69 Movie ........................................................... reviews..................................................... 63 Puzzler 66

Creative Loafing Tampa is published by Tampa Weekly, LLC, 204 E. Henderson Ave., Tampa, FL, 33602.

The physical edition is available free of charge at locations throughout Tampa Bay and online at cltampa.com. Copyright 2021, Tampa Weekly, LLC. The newspaper is produced and printed on Indigenous land belonging to Tampa Bay’s Tocobaga and Seminole tribes.

MUSIC WEEK �������������������� 38 ORACLE OF YBOR ������������� 43

Jane Castor wants to know if you’d vote for her again, p. 14.

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EDITORIAL POLICY — Creative Loafing Tampa is a publication covering public issues, the arts and entertainment. In our pages appear views from across the political and social spectrum.

They do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

On one page of the poll, Castor is described as a ‘take-charge’ and ‘courageous’ leader who’s ‘attacking crime.’”

NEWS+VIEWS ������������������� 11

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TheWill List Astrology ..........................................................

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/food Best restaurants of 2021

/music New concerts out the ass /news Are manatees extinct yet? /arts Brady-watch

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I am so very very sad

A ‘Scott Pilgrim’ concert leads the weekend itinerary.

By Stephanie Powers and Ray Roa

P

romoter Sean O’Brien—under the moniker MNE presents—is back with the popular “Reel Deal” series pairing cult classic movies with local musicians performing the soundtrack. The first shot in the re-launch of the monthly event finds the graphic novelinspired “Scott Pilgrim vs. the World” screening at Crowbar.

A crap ton of local musicians including Shawn Kyle, Melissa Grady, Jeremy Gloff, Crate Brothers, Matt Burke, Billy Summers, and Noan Partly perform songs by the likes of Broken Social Scene, Beck and T. Rex. Most importantly, expect covers of the made-for-the-movie bands like Michael Cera-fronted Sex Bob-omb (“Garbage Truck”) and rivals Crash and the Boys (“I’m So Sad, So Very, Very Sad”). The 2010 Edgar Wright-directed movie plays first first, then it’s showtime for the local musicians.

Reel Deal Thursdays: Scott Pilgrim Soundtrack w/Sean Pomeroy/Adam Revak/Shawn Kyle/ Noan Partley/Matt Burke/Scott Anderson/ Melissa Grady/The Dags/Jeremy Gloff/more.

Thursday, Dec. 16, 7 p.m. $15. Crowbar, Ybor City. @reeldealthurs on Facebook Vegan latte art competition goes down at newish South of Gandy cafe There are at least a thousand reasons to go vegan, but making cool designs on your latte isn’t one of them. Plant-based milks just don’t froth the way cow discharge does, but that’s not

stopping WeVegan Cafe—which has been holding it down South of Gandy since it opened this summer—from hosting a latte art competition on Friday night.

“Alternative milks are typically pretty tricky to texture and pour with,” Luis Espel, a beloved figure in the local coffee world told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, adding that oat milk seems to perform best. “Some [oat milks] almost steam as well as whole milk.”

It’s a good thing Oatly is the presenting sponsor for this latte art throwdown that’ll also have plenty of plant-based food and adult beverages on tap. First ‘spro pours out at 6:30 p.m. WeVegan Throwdown. Friday, Dec. 17 6 p.m.

Free to attend ($10 to enter). WeVegan Cafe, 4326 S Manhattan Ave., Tampa. weveganeats.com Gulfport’s Blueberry Patch hosts rock show toy drive Joe Roma is easily one of the kindest figures in Tampa Bay’s music scene, so it’s no surprise to see him involved with a Gulfport toy drive and concert happening at the ultra-quirky Blueberry Patch. Roma’s band—the mostly instrumental rock-pop fusion act Row Jomah—teams up with funky psych-jam outfit the Reality for this one where donations of new toys ($10-plus value) gets you into the show. The Reality w/Row Jomah.

Saturday, Dec. 18, 6 p.m. Donations accepted.

The Blueberry Patch, 4923 20th Ave. S, Gulfport. @blueberrypatch on Facebook

UNIVERSAL PICTURES

IF YOUR LIFE HAD A FACE, I WOULD PUNCH IT: Yes, Sex Bob-omb are on the agenda at the ‘Reel Deal’ reboot.

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 7

Farewell, Windwalker

Photos by Tracy May c/o Skipper’s Smokehouse

V

ince McGilvra and Tom White co-founded Skipper’s Smokehouse together, but McGilvra got out of operating the storied Tampa venue first. “Son of a gun beat me to it,” White told CL in an email on Monday morning. A few hours later, White—who became instant brothers with McGilvra when they met in 1971—would have the tough task of remembering his friend who died on Oct. 13 at the age of 75.

“We should do a quick toast, I’m getting thirsty, and that’s how Vince would’ve liked it,” White told a crowd of friends and family gathered at Skipper’s where McGilvra was known as “The Windwalker.” Read the full story and see more pictures via cltampa.com/slideshows.—Ray Roa

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cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 9

10 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

POLITICS

ISSUES

OPINION

Fire fight

Pension delays and lack of injury pay plague Tampa firefighters.

J

ennifer Menendez came to a Tampa City Council meeting last Thursday to express how her family has struggled this year ever since her husband, former Tampa Fire Rescue Captain Joe Menendez, was let go after he was injured in the line of duty.

Before he was released from his duties Joe was extremely dedicated to his job, Jennifer told council. He spent holidays away from his kids and missed birthdays, along with other important milestones. He’s visited members of his crew in the hospital and donated to firefighters in need. He helped fellow firefighters build their homes. Their family’s connection to the department ran so deep that Jennifer and Joe were married at the Tampa Firefighter Museum.

Jennifer tried to control the emotion in her voice as she read her statement during last Thursday’s meeting. She brought her children Joey and Mallory, who bounced around the public comment area of city hall while she spoke. Joe wasn’t able to attend the meeting, because he was out searching for employment, so Jennifer went to plead with city council to honor her husband, who gave so much to the fire department.

“Even after Joe was hurt on the job, he was working late duty at the downtown office,” Jennifer told city council. “He spent his days assisting with firefighter grants for Tampa. He didn’t just sit around.”

At 40-years-old, and after serving for over 18 years, firefighting was what Joe knew best. Now, he has to support his family, along with pay for their health care, which costs his family $1,600 a month since he lost his job this year. There’s a lifeline waiting for the family in the form of his pension from Tampa Fire Rescue, but he’s received nothing, because of a hold-up with the pension board.

Jennifer was one of several people who spoke at the city council meeting, from families of firefighters, to current and former firefighters. While she didn’t go into details about Joe’s injury, and CL did not receive a response to a request for comment from Joe, she was one of many who decried lack of support for those injured on the job and delayed pension benefits. The firefighters also described faulty equipment and dangerous working conditions that have led to injuries.

“Everybody who has spoken here,

administration, city council, everybody agrees that these people have given everything for this city,” said councilman Luis Viera. “And I think everybody has a sense that they deserve more.”

City council members asked Tampa Fire officials, who were attending the meeting virtually, why the firefighters find themselves in such a dire position.

“If the individual gets hurt on a job we continue to provide benefits, as well as medical support for the individuals when the physicians decide that this individual is no longer to operate in the capacity of being a firefighter,” said Tampa Fire Rescue Captain Barbara Tripp. When it is determined that the employee can no longer operate as a firefighter, that’s when they apply to the pension, Tripp said. She said that the worker’s compensation benefits are still there for them during this time, and they’re still accruing their paid vacation time, sick time, as well as their pension.

Tripp said that each case is different and depends on what the doctors determine for each person, but that that the worker’s comp support for firefighters typically ends a year after a doctor determines they can’t fulfill the normal duties of a firefighter. “We just go through the policies and procedures set by the city of Tampa,” Tripp said. “As well as the collective bargain agreement.”

But Jeff Allred, newly elected vice president for the local International Association of Firefighters Union said that the process is not working for those who lay their lives on the line for the City of Tampa. He says that it’s taking six to eight months to get paperwork back from the pension board when firefighters apply.

“I know Joe Menendez asked,” Allred said.

“He applied for the pension a couple months ago.

It took eight weeks for them [the pension board] to say they hadn’t gotten him his paperwork back. He got his paperwork and an hour and a half when he called the doctors himself, so the bottleneck is there.”

Tanja Vidovic, who left the fire department last week after working light-duty due to an injury she received, spoke out about several issues at Tampa Fire Rescue, and placed the blame on Tripp’s administration. She told city council that historically, when an injured

LOCAL NEWS

FIRERESCUETAMPA/FACEBOOK

By Justin Garcia

BETTER DAYS: Tampa Fire Rescue Captain Joe Menendez, pictured in November 2021. firefighter does not recover, they are given 12 months of compensation up until their pension kicks in. This makes it so there’s a seamless form of income for the firefighters.

“This is not how the administration is working things, they are not honoring that and I understand it is her right to not honor it. But it doesn’t make it right.” Vidovic said. Now, Vidovic says some firefighters are being dropped off worker’s comp after six months, and their pensions are taking up to 18 months to kick in, leaving them in situations like the Menendez family finds themselves in.

Vidovic said that after years of wearing gear that didn’t fit correctly, the belt portion didn’t get tight, because it was made for larger men. The belt was supposed to fit tight on her lower back. It didn’t get tight enough, which moved all the weight to the shoulders. After 13 years of service, she ended up with a shoulder and neck injury.

In 2015, Vidovic filed a discrimination charge with the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission against Tampa Fire Rescue, claiming three captains solicited her for sex and retaliated against her for standing up for gender equality in the workplace. In 2016, she sued the City of Tampa for harassment, discrimination and retaliation by her superiors and coworkers and was immediately fired. In 2017, it was ruled that she was discriminated against, and that the city had retaliated against her when she complained. Vidovic began work with Tampa Fire

Rescue again in 2018, and was released from Tampa Fire due to her neck injury last week.

Kelly Austin, director of human resources and talent for the City of Tampa referenced a collective bargaining agreement, state law and cases of malfeasance as reasons why worker’s compensation for those injured on the job stands as it is.

“We have to abide by all policies, practices and procedures as prescribed by chapter 440 and the Florida Statutes, in addition to what we abide by in our collective bargaining agreement,” Austin said. “There’s no action by any employer that can change what is laid out in chapter 440 as it relates to entitlements of medical payments and indemnity payments. So we can’t do anything different than the law prescribes.”

Chapter 440 describes state rules for workers compensations benefits and limits, but it does not explain the unfolding pension delay issue with Tampa Fire, nor does it explain the claims that some firefighters are being dropped from worker’s compensation early.

Every city council member expressed concern about the situation, and asked for an update from Tampa Fire Rescue at the last city council meeting of the year, on Dec. 16.

“You know these firefighters give so much to us,” said Tampa City Councilman Guido Maniscalco. “They sacrifice every time a call comes in, when they put on their gear to serve the community. We should be treating them better.”

“I think everybody has a sense that they deserve more.”

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 11

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JANECASTOR/TWITTER

CHOSEN ONE: Mercury Public Affairs sent text messages to select Tampeños.

Poll position

Stadium price tag, re-election among topics in new poll about Jane Castor.

By Justin Garcia

A

new poll asks Tampeños about the City of Tampa, the Tampa Bay Rays’ potential Ybor City stadium and whether or not they’d reelect Mayor Jane Castor.

It’s unclear how many people were polled, but the poll was delivered last week to a Creative Loafing Tampa Bay staffer’s mobile phone via text message. The poll was commissioned by Mercury Public Affairs.

Public records show that in August, Castor’s Tampa Strong PAC paid Mercury $12,000, and Ashley Walker—a partner at Mercury—did not return calls or text messages from CL. The poll hypothetically breaks down specifics of a plan to bring the stadium to Tampa. A question says the Rays would play about 40 games per year, mostly in the early and later part of the season, and the other half in Montreal. The hypothetical plan also says the Rays would pay for half the cost of the new ballpark, adding that the other half—about $350 million— would come from public revenue sources such as new property and sales taxes from development in the ballpark district and some form of a tourist tax.

“Would you support or oppose a Rays ballpark plan like this?” the poll asks. The question is notable because the mayor has yet to publicly comment on taxpayers footing half the bill on a new stadium.

Yesterday, Adam Smith, Communications Director at the City of Tampa, told his former Tampa Bay Times colleague Charlie Frago that “no dollar figure has been agreed upon.”

Smith added that Castor’s staff is still working on “a workable financial package” with Hillsborough County and the Tampa Sports Authority and that the package would be “ready soon.”

Nationally, the value of sports arenas has come under serious challenge. Castor has dismissed sports economists who’ve wondered out loud about whether or not a new baseball stadium bring significant economic development to a city.

Castor is not up for re-election until 2023 and has yet to draw an opponent, but the poll twice asks if the poll taker would re-elect Castor— once toward the beginning, and again at the end. Between the first time the poll taker is asked and the second, the wording of poll questions celebrates the mayor, who defeated since-deceased David A. Straz in a 2019 runoff.

On one page of the poll, Castor is described as a “take-charge” and “courageous” leader who’s “attacking crime,” with the phrases underlined to draw the reader’s attention to the words. The poll taker is left to make their own decision, from very positive to negative.

After the poll taker has made selections, they are asked to answer this question in their own words: “After hearing this about Jane Castor, what would you say is her biggest strength...the thing she does best as Mayor?”

The poll also brings up Castor’s controversial crime free multi-housing program, asking if the poll taker has heard of it and if they support it.

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The plot against America is just getting started Revelations about Trump’s coup-plotting aren’t a scandal. They’re a five-alarm fire.

By Jeffrey C. Billman is damning. The White House was ass-deep in an attempted coup.

Meadows was in contact with the Jan. 6 “Stop the Steal” organizers both leading up to and on the day of the rally that turned into a riot. He encouraged Republican officials and state legislators to send so-called alternate slates of electors to Congress and introduced Trump to Jeffrey Clark, the Department of Justice lackey who wanted Trump to appoint him acting attorney general so he could instruct states to subvert their election results.

He was on the call when Trump pressured Georgia officials to “find” enough votes to put him over the top. He sent an email on Jan. 5 saying the National Guard would be on hand at the Capitol the next day to “protect proTrump people.” He emailed Pence’s staff a legal memo concocted by the Trump campaign’s legal team offering a rationale for overturning the election.

The last two are worth particular attention. The White House chief of staff said troops under the government’s control would protect those pressuring the vice president to reverse the election. He provided guidance from the president’s political campaign on how the vice president could, by himself, block election results based on a manufactured premise: “Six states currently have electoral delegates in disputes [they didn’t] and there is sufficient rational and legal basis to question whether the state law and Constitution was followed [there wasn’t].”

In a different era, these acts of sedition might have earned Meadows a blindfold and cigarette.

Instead, he got a book deal.

Trump’s plans failed because Mike Pence didn’t want history to know him as the man who killed democracy.

But for Trump, Jan. 6 became a dress rehearsal. He’s spent the last year putting the pieces in place to ensure that next time, he’ll win—whether he wins or not. He’s using his national network to target Republicans who didn’t support his Big Lie, supporting challengers to Republican secretaries of state in Michigan, Arizona, and Georgia, as well as opponents of Republicans who voted to impeach him.

In Georgia’s governor’s race, Trump is backing David Perdue in the Republican primary over Brian Kemp, whose cardinal sin was certifying the state’s election results because the law required him to do so. Purdue says he wouldn’t

INFORMED DISSENT

“In a different era, these acts of sedition might have earned Meadows a blindfold and cigarette.”

have let such trifles get in his way. He’s also supporting an election denier in Arizona’s gubernatorial primary.

Most importantly, he’s convinced the vast majority of Republicans that Joe Biden’s 7-million-vote victory was illegitimate; no amount of debunking or fact-checking will change that reality. More than 60% of potential GOP primary voters say Trump’s fraud claims are essential to being a Republican. And those obsessed with Trump’s conspiracies are much more enthusiastic about next year’s elections than Republicans who live in the real world.

Election fraud has become a foundation principle of what was once the Party of Lincoln. Soon, few Republicans who question Trump’s 2020 narrative will remain, and the path to subverting

the next election will be clear. The playbook has already been written; it just needs a few more loyalists to carry it out. By 2024, they’ll be in place—for Trump, for Ron DeSantis, for whoever.

This isn’t a scandal. This is a five-alarm fire.

Everyone—Democrats, Republicans who care about institutions, the mainstream media— needs to treat it that way. Trump officials need to be held accountable for Jan. 6. The media must stop normalizing election deniers. Congress needs to counter the voter-suppression initiatives that sprang from the Big Lie; if that means circumventing the filibuster, so be it. Voting rights—the fragility of our democracy—has to be the centerpiece of the next year’s election.

The plot against America isn’t over. It’s just getting started.

OFFICIAL WHITE HOUSE PHOTO BY TIA DUFIOUR

T

he plot against America was more detailed than John Eastman’s memo urging Mike Pence to invent constitutional powers to declare Donald Trump president. While it was every bit as insane and hackish and premised on Newsmax-level conspiracy theories as you might expect from Trump’s crew, it also came closer to fruition than any of us should be comfortable with.

“Declare National Security Emergency.”

“Declare electronic voting in all states invalid.”

“A Trusted Lead Counter will be appointed with authority from the POTUS to direct the actions of select federalized National Guard units and support from DOJ, DHS and other US government agencies as needed to complete a recount of the legal paper ballots for the federal elections in all 50 states.”

“US Marshals will immediately secure all ballots and provide a protective perimeter around the locations in all 50 states.”

“VP Pence seats Republican Electors over objections of Democrats in states where fraud occurred.”

On Jan. 5, the day before the Capitol insurrection, White House chief of staff Mark Meadows received a 38-page Powerpoint presentation outlining how the administration could execute a bloodless coup. Featuring inscrutable flowcharts, the presentation alleged that “the Chinese systematically gained control over our election system constituting a national security emergency,” and there is an “ongoing globalist/socialist operation to subvert the will of United States Voters and install a China ally.”

That PowerPoint surfaced last week as part of materials Meadows turned over to the House committee investigating the Jan. 6 attack on the Capitol before he stopped cooperating. His lawyer downplayed its significance, telling The New York Times that Meadows didn’t act on the presentation, circulated among Trump’s congressional allies by a former Army colonel. The former colonel, Paul Waldron, said he didn’t send Meadows the Powerpoint, but he told The Washington Post he spoke with the chief of staff “eight to 10 times” leading up to Jan. 6.

There’s a reason Trump and Meadows are suing to hide information about the insurrection from the committee: What it already knows

THUMB UP THE ASS: America’s just standing by watching the next coup unfold.

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 17

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DINING ROOM NOW OPEN! Hours: Sunday - Closed / Monday - Saturday • 12-9pm 610 S. Armenia Ave • Hyde Park /SoHo • (813) 258-1999 Curbside Carryout & Delivery Available / gourmetpizza-company.com 18 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

GIve the gift of bella’s!

Cookbooks and gift cards available 1413 S. Howard Ave, Ste 100, Tampa, Florida 33606 813-254-3355 • bellasitaliancafe.com

o c ta s ’ it Let ut o ‘b

YOU ASKED FOR IT! YOU GOT IT!

street tacos baha mexican fare Melts & munchies 2 for 1 Beer specials

685 CENTRAL AVE • ST PETERSBURG • 727-851-9862 cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 19

Shit Happened TUESDAY 14

• Made from Scratch • Craft Sandwiches • Brined Meats • Rotisserie Chicken • Craft Beer • Seasonal Sangria Sun-Thu11am-8pm / Fri & Sat 11am-10pm

brinehouse.com

“Old school Florida” restaurant featuring unique “Taste of St. Louis” menu served alongside small batch, house-brewed and other local craft beer!

923 72nd St N, St. Petersburg, FL 33710 (727) 302-9600 • peskypelicanbrewpub.com 20 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

FRIDAY 10 ADAM SCHULTZ

100 Main St, Suite 104 / Safety Harbor / 727-600-8009

The Tampa Bay Business Journal says a downtown Tampa property including a historic sandstone structure, Moxie’s, and the Dohring building has been sold and will be demolished.

At this point “progress” would actually entail preserving what’s left of this city.

As Gov. Ron DeSantis launched another broadside against the federal government’s immigration policies, the state said it’s dropping a legal challenge against the Biden administration over immigration directives issued early this year. Looks like another L for the blustering governor and more progress for sleepy Joe.

DAVE DECKER

AUSTIN/ADOBE

The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service plans to lift its own restrictions on feeding manatees to help the animals that winter in the Indian River lagoon where seagrass has been decimated by polluted runoff from phosphate plants and Florida’s pristine lawns. You still can’t feed them yourself, so don’t go on an iceberg lettuce shopping spree.

Three residents of The Villages, Florida’s largest retirement community, were arrested for allegedly voting multiple times in the 2020 election. While there is no record of who they voted for, all three are registered Republicans and two of the accused appeared to share pro-Trump posts on Facebook. So where was that voter fraud happening again?

WOLLERTZ/ADOBE

WEDNESDAY 08

WFLA reports that two people in Hillsborough have died and dozens of others were hospitalized with severe bleeding after using a tainted form of synthetic marijuana known as spice.

Here’s a reminder that no one ever bled out from smoking too much marijuana.

Shit, but on our new website still re-indexing on Google, via cltampa.com/news.

DINNER @ RIVETERS! THE FRESHEST FOOD w/ HOMEMADE SAUCES & DRESSINGS! LUNCH & LATE NIGHT FOOD TOO! OUR STORY:

We are an eclectic bar and restaurant with a nostalgic feel, located in west Tampa. Stepping through our doors, you’ll experience the significance of an era that transformed the role of women in society and the workplace.

Enjoy a scratch-made meal prepared with the freshest ingredients along with your favorite brew or one of our handcrafted cocktails. Here at Riveters we strive to empower everyone from staff to patrons and aim to provide an experience like no other.

DRINK • DINE • DANCE

SPECIALTY DRINKS

ASK ABOUT OUR REDBULL SELECTIONS

Air Raid Lemonade | $7.95 Taking frozen drinks back to the 1940’s. Rosie’s specialty blend of vodka, liqueurs, and citrus juice.

A perfect refresher for viewing the airshow. Add a Twist and enhance your Flavor. Strawberry, Mango, Peach, Pomegranate or Blackberry Riveter New Fashioned | $12.95 Woodford Reserve Bourbon, Honey, Chocolate & Orange Bitters.

Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better | $8.95 Damrak Gin, Lemon, Sparkling Wine, Violette Liqueur Churchill’s Sidecar | $10.95 Cognac, Blackberry, Lemon, Rose Flower Liqueur Rosie’s Pink G&T | $8.95 Gin Lane Victorian Pink Gin, Rosemary, Tonic Water From Back in Thyme | $10.95 Jack Daniels Rye, Lemon, Apricot, Ginger Beer, Thyme

APPATEASERS

Propaganda Poutine Fries | $12.65 Diced rib eye, Wisconsin white cheddar cheese curds, beer gravy, banana peppers, crispy bacon, house pickled red onions, seashore fries.

Hellcat Wings | $12.95 8 Beer brined, dry rubbed, and served with choice of two sauces: Blue Cheese, Ranch, Buffalo, Mango Habanero, or Memphis BBQ. Additional sauce for .50 cents.

Chili Cheese Fries | $7 Seashore fries, house chili, sour cream, shredded cheese, sliced jalapenos, house pickled red onions.

Buffalo Chicken Dip| $9.99 House made Buffalo chicken dip, Panko crust, Tortilla chips and topped with blue cheese crumbles.

FROM THE FIELD

HOUSEMADE DRESSINGS AVAILABLE: RANCH, SPICY RANCH, CREAMY BLUE CHEESE, BALSAMIC VINAIGRETTE, 1000 ISLAND, HONEY MUSTARD. Burrata Salad | $11.95 Heirloom tomatoes, mixed greens, burrata cheese, roasted Almonds, balsamic reduction, and extravirgin olive oil drizzle.

Caesar Salad | Small $4.95 | Large $9.95 Romaine heart, croutons and Caesar dressing.

Add Bacon for $1

A Shot of Penicillin | $9.95 Monkey Shoulder Whiskey, Lemon, Ginger Cucumbersome Mule | $10.95 Cucumber mint vodka, lime juice, ginger beer, cucumber bitters Citrus Got Real | $9.95 Lemon vodka, ginger liquor, sour mix.

Whole Latte Love | $10.95 Stoli Vanilla vodka, Khalua, espresso & a splash of Irish cream.

Scrimp n Grits | $12.50 Southern Style Blackened Shrimp, Cajun gravy, with red bell pepper, bacon and scallions, Cheesy Grits.

Giant Pretzel | $10.25 Traditional Bavarian style pretzel with house made beer cheese.

Munition Mussels | $11.95 Beer braised, finished in Vietnamese Lemon Curry sauce, grilled crostini.

Wildcat Shrimp | $12.50 Jumbo grilled shrimp, crusty french bread, Jamaican jerk lemon butter.

French Onion Bombers | $12.95 Prime Rib, Corned Beef, frenched onions, white cheddar tucked in fried wontons. Served with 1000 island.

Steak Salad | $18.95 8oz center-cut sirloin, Blue cheese crumbles, Avocado, Tomato, House Pickled onions with a balsamic glaze drizzle.

HOT DOGS

HANDHELDS

Rosie’s Dog | $9.99 Certified Wagyu All beef 1⁄4 hot dog Char-grilled, topped with beer cheese, sauerkraut, on a poppy seed bun.

The Kram It Prime Rib Sandwich | $14.50 Blackened Prime Rib, French Roll, Au Jus, Horsey Sauce.

Chili Cheese Dog | $9.99 Certified wagyu all beef hot dog, chili, shredded cheese, diced red onions, fresh sliced jalapenos, poppy seed bun.

The Reuben | $10.50 Beer braised corned beef, Bavarian-style kraut, 1000 Island, and Swiss on grilled rye bread.

SERVED WITH YOUR CHOICE OF SIDE.

BBQ Bacon Dog | $10.99 Certified wagyu all beef hot dog, house made BBQ sauce, bourbon bacon jam, fried onion straws, poppy seed bun.

BURGERS

SERVED WITH YOUR CHOICE OF SIDE.

The Riveter Burger | $12.95 8 oz. Certified Wagyu Beef, Brioche Bun, dijonaise, lettuce, tomato, pickle, onion. Choice of cheese.

Bomber Burger | $13.95 Certified wagyu beef, brioche bun, Applewood smoked bacon, cheddar cheese, house made BBQ sauce.

Breakfast Burger | $13.95 Certified wagyu beef, toasted croissant, dijonaise, lettuce, tomato, onion, pickle, cheddar cheese, bourbon bacon jam, sunny side up egg.

Black and Blue Burger | $13.95 Certified wagyu beef blackened, brioche bun, blue cheese fondue, bourbon bacon jam, balsamic reduction.

Veggie Burger | $13.95 Vegetarian Burger patty, brioche bun, lettuce, tomato pickle and onion.

Burger add-ons $1 each Peppered bacon | house-made bacon jam | Avocado bacon slaw | Mushrooms | caramelized onion | Chili onion straws | egg | beer cheese | extra cheese

SOUPS

Vegetarian French Onion | Cup $5 Bowl $7 Cheese crouton, sherry.

Warhawk Chili | Cup $5 Bowl $7 Beer and whiskey braised ground beef and brisket, 2 beans, topped with cheddar, sour cream, chives.

ADD-ONS

Rosie’s House Salad Small $4.95 |Large $9 | W/Chicken $10.95 Mixed greens, tomatoes, cucumbers, onions, potato sticks.

Burger Patty $6 | Vegan Burger Patty $6 | Bacon $2 Chicken $4 | Fish $MP | Shrimp $6 | Steak $8 Fried Egg $1 | Avocado $2 | Goat Cheese $2

Fried Chicken Salad | $12.95 Crispy fried beer brined chicken breast, sliced avocado, shredded Monterey jack cheese, chopped, bacon, cucumbers, heirloom cherry tomatoes, mixed greens.

French Fries | Roasted Garlic Mashers Steamed Veg O’ Day | White BBQ Bacon Slaw Baked Potato | Sautéed Spinach With Garlic

*CONSUMING RAW OR UNDERCOOKED MEATS, POULTRY, SEAFOOD, SHELLFISH OR EGGS MAY INCREASE YOUR RISK OF FOOD BORNE ILLNESS, ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVE CERTAIN MEDICAL CONDITIONS.

SIDES | $4

SERVED WITH YOUR CHOICE OF SIDE.

Fish Sandwich | MP Grilled, blackened, or fried on a Brioche bun, dijonaise, lettuce, tomato, pickle and onion.

The Warbird Chicken Sandwich | $11.95 Deep-fried Beer brined chicken breast, lettuce, pickles, mayo.

The MacDill Grilled Cheese | $11.95 Cheddar, Swiss, Provolone, Applewood smoked bacon, Brioche, everything bagel seasoning.

Chicken Biscuit Sandwich | $11.95 Crispy fried chicken breast, toasted biscuit, spicy ranch, cheddar cheese, pepper bacon, sunny side up egg.

MAN ATTRACTIONS

SERVED WITH YOUR CHOICE OF SIDE.

Catalina Chicken | $16.50 Grilled Herb marinated double breast chicken, goat cheese, spinach, capers, sundried tomatoes, lemon butter.

Mustang Steak | $20.95 Pineapple soy marinated 8 oz. Center cut sirloin, chargrilled, topped with garlic butter.

Chargrilled Sirloin | $19.99 8oz of center cut sirloin With Riveters house-made seasoning, grilled to perfection.

Fresh Catch | $22.50 Local caught, fresh fish grilled, blackened, or fried, lemon butter.

Pork Chop | $13.95 Grilled pork chop, mustard mushroom cream.

Thunderbolt Prime Rib | 8oz $19 / 12oz $22 Fri & Sat only after 5:30pm Herb, garlic marinated slow cooked Prime Rib, sliced to order. Served with au jus, horsey sauce.

Bacon Wrapped Meatloaf | $14.50 Pepper bacon wrapped meatloaf, mushroom beer gravy, fried onion straws.

DELICIOUS DO-WRONGS

Salty and Decadent | $7 Salted caramel, pretzel, and dark chocolate brownie served a’la mode.

Cheesecake O’Day | $6 Chefs house made cheesecake.

RIVETERS SPECIALTY

2301 N Dale Mabry Hwy • Tampa, FL • 33607 • (813) 559-1450 • riveterstampa.com RECEIVE EVEN MORE GREAT OFFERS! CONNECT WITH US:

@RivetersTampa •

/RivetersTampa

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 21

SPEND $40, GET A $50 GIFT CARD SPEND $80, GET A $100 GIFT CARD OFFER AVAILABLE IN-STORE ONLY**

22 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

CLOSINGS RESTAURANTS

RECIPES

Roll over

DINING GUIDES

Some of the saddest restaurant closings of 2021.

By Stephanie Powers

T

mainly-beer spot. A relocation is in the works, but in the meantime their second concept is planned for Seventh Avenue in Ybor City.

Sparkman Wharf, Tampa Grillsmith (Carrollwood) The Carrollwood location of the national chain closed in May because of fire damage. According to the refinedcasual restaurant’s Facebook page, remodeling

CITYOFSTPETE/FLICKR

he restaurant industry has never been easy, but the last couple years created a whole new host of challenges. While plenty of new and exciting concepts popped up in 2021, this past year Tampa Bay also lost a few iconic bars and restaurants. This is by no means a complete list, but here are all the significant closures we know of.

Ballyhoo Grill Citrus Park fish camp staple Ballyhoo Grill closed its doors on Sunday, Sept. 26. Some form of the local favorite has sat at the corner of Ehrlich Road and Gunn Highway since the 1910s. 7604 Ehrlich Rd., Citrus Park Brass Tap (Pinellas) The beer-centric chain closed it’s only Pinellas location, at Tyrone Square Mall, in February. Not to fret; Carrollwood, Wesley Chapel’s Wiregrass, and close-to-Midtown locations are still open. 2438 Tyrone Blvd N, St. Petersburg Brew Bus Brewing in Seminole Heights For now “the production and offerings of Brew Bus beer will relocate to the new Florida Avenue Brewing Co. facility located in Wesley Chapel.” But according to renderings dated May 17 on Tampa’s Accela Citizen Access site, a new “Brew Bus Brewery” designed by Carbon Architectures is proposed for the vacant building 4315 N Florida Ave. just two blocks away.

4101 N Florida Ave., Tampa Cider Press Cafe (Central Avenue location) This favorite serving up “plant-based comfort food” isn’t closing-closing, just moving down Central Avenue—from its downtown St. Pete location to Historic Kenwood at 3118 3rd Avenue North—by the end of the year. There it will take the form of Cider Press Vegan Gastropub and Patio Bar. 601 Central Ave., St. Petersburg Coney Island Sandwich Shop We’re still holding on to hope that this iconic restaurant will reopen at some point. It’s hard to imagine a St. Pete without the family-owned hot dog spot run by 85-year-old Hank Barlas—whose father opened what was then-called Coney Island Grill back in 1926. 250 Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. St. N, St. Petersburg Fermented Reality Biergarten Strategic Property Partners, which operates Sparkman Wharf, chose not to renew the lease of this

to give St. Pete a place that was really special,” owner Russell Andrade told CL. 475 N Central Ave., St. Petersburg Ichicoro Imoto It’s a mystery why the Armature location of the popular ramen shop closed—after being with the food hall since the beginning—but it did. Luckily for the “Ramen Army”, the Seminole Heights brick and mortar location is still open.Armature Works, Tampa Heights Kojak’s House of Ribs Staple Kojak’s House of Ribs, opened since 1978, closed it’s South Tampa doors after getting an offer from developers who will tear down the 1927-built

DOGGONE IT: We’re still holding out hope for a Coney Island reopening. is in the works but no reopening date is listed.

14303 N Dale Mabry Hwy., Tampa Iberian Rooster Iberian Rooster was a staple in downtown St. Pete since it’s opening a little over four years ago thanks to its three-inone space with a bar, restaurant—which became Avo’s Kitchen in 2020—and SubCentral, the basement event space. “I’m just really happy

bungalow and put up new apartments. A new location in Seffner, at 1809 S Parsons Ave., is set to open at some point. 2808 Gandy Blvd., Tampa Kuba Cocina @ Armature Works Kuba Cocina (FKA Hemingways) left Armature Works for a new location in Tampa—the original Seminole Heights home of The Refinery—which has yet to open. Fans of the Cuban restaurant

can visit the St. Pete Beach location, at 7525 Blind Pass Rd., which opened this year.

Armature Works, Tampa Heights Lucy’s Vegan Corner Quick-service sandwich-focused spot closed its doors in March, breaking local plant-based hearts. Vegan diner Freya’s opened in the Grand Central space in June. 2462 Central Ave., St. Petersburg Nojaks Vegan burger joint Nojaks closed in February with hopes of relocation. Instead, the same owners, but different team, brought in Supernatural Food and Wine with “mean sandwiches” and Best of the Bay-winning vegan donuts. 305 E Polk St., Tampa Moon Under Water St. Pete’s British pubstyle restaurant closed in February with Ceviche taking its place. Caledon Concepts—which owns both spots as well as Rococo Steak—promised a new location, but nothing has been announced as of yet. 332 Beach Dr. NE, St. Petersburg Red Star Rock Bar Opened in 2015, the dive bar across from Ichicoro closed in July.

The brand’s two other concepts Red Star Live, restaurant and venue behind Brandon HarleyDavidson, and White Lies in Ybor are still open.

5210 N Florida Ave., Tampa Side Piece The Restorative’s literal Side Piece—a small restaurant focused on paninis inside of Caledonia Brewing—closed in April and made way for Cameron Capri’s Q Southern Outpost to move into the 100-square-foot space.

587 Main Street, Dunedin Sophia’s Cocina + Enoteca Owners Alex and Kelly Rodriguez passed the keys to Nando Silvestri—responsible for Tampa’s Matteo Trattoria & Pizzeria—who turned the Central Avenue spot into his own Italian concept, you guessed it, Matteo’s. The Rodriguez’s still have the cat-themed Sammy + Paco’s cafe and Lolita’s catering business humming along. 2363 Central Ave., St. Petersburg Tutto Bene Tutto Bene announced its closure on Facebook as owners Allan and Michelle Bishop decided to pack up shop and move back to Canada. Neighboring restaurant Pia’s Trattoria is taking over the spot, creating a new concept called Pia’s Veranda. 3038 Beach Blvd S, Gulfport WEPA Cocina de Puerto Rico St.Pete Puerto Rican spot, located in the Warehouse Arts District, serving up mofongo and whole pan fried snapper closed its doors in July. Sol Bistro—which specializes in “gluten-free, lactose intolerant friendly, peanut-free, soy-free, refined sugar free” comfort foods—now lives in the space. 2149 3rd Ave S, St. Petersburg

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 23

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“Kids of the vendors who were tiny when they first got here...we watched them grow up.”

MOVIES

THEATER

ART

CULTURE

Fun’s over

Employees and vendors wonder what’s next after closure of iconic Tampa drive-in.

By Justin Garcia entire lot. It used to be a whole family ordeal to go to the drive-in.”

Jennifer Stanford worked as Snell’s secretary for the past two years. Her 18-year-old son Daniel Perez worked there for just two weeks before the news of the closing came down, so now he’s helping with the closing of Fun-Lan. Stanford, 46, put on her blue and gold swap shop shirt that morning and thought to herself, “This is it.”

themselves in speak to the larger issues with the business. It was owned under the company name “Florida Swap Shops” by the Henn family from Fort Lauderdale. The family has a colorful past, to say the least.

Preston and Betty Henn took over operations of Tampa’s Fun-Lan in 1980 after the property changed hands between a theater company and then an advertising company.

The Henns bought the property with a partner named Harold Spears, who was bought out by the Henns in 2007. According to the South Florida Sun-Sentinel, Preston Henn raced cars, once was tased by sheriffs and kicked out of a squad car, got caught up in a fake purse scheme and had to settle in court with Coach and Louis Vuitton. continued on page 29

LOCAL NEWS

Changing hands Their former working conditions and the situation the Fun-Lan employees now find

JUSTIN GARCIA

C

andy Snell’s last day working at Tampa’s iconic Fun-Lan Drive-In and Swap Shop was bittersweet, but she was really trying her best to not be bitter at all. She was surrounded by a sea of refuse, debris and rotten fruit as Fun-Lan sat gutted alongside Hillsborough Avenue and 22nd Street in Tampa. Behind her, construction workers ripped apart the awning that covered the central section of Fun-Lan, where the abandoned concession stand and vendor spaces rested underneath.

Snell and her coworkers talked about their time at the flea market and their last day on the property as blank projector screens sat ghostly white behind them. Over the past five years, Snell, who turned 48 years old on Dec. 11, had worked her way up from fry cook to ticket booth attendant to manager. After managing since the beginning of this year for $16 an hour, she got news last week that felt like a kick in the stomach.

On Dec. 2, Snell and her fellow workers got three days’ notice from the owner that Fun-Lan would be shutting its doors permanently. Over the past week, she’s helped dismantle her former workplace—her last day at Fun-Lan was Dec. 10.

Four months ago, the drive-in shut down, but the money was always coming from Fun-Lan’s swap shop flea market, so Snell thought things would continue on. But now, she’s heading into the holidays without a job, and no severance after her five years of service to the legendary Tampa drive-in theater and swap shop, which opened in 1950 to show its first film. “Upper management said they feel bad that this is happening this way,” she told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “But it feels like we’re left out to dry.”

It’s been hard work making the final preparations for the demise of Fun-Lan, emotionally and physically. Snell knows that she has good memories there, but they’re hard to recall at the moment. But she has a deep knowledge of the property, the massive projector screens, the hurricanes that destroyed certain screens, along with the history and culture of Fun-Lan. “I would love to go back in time and see this place in its heyday, when this parking lot was full of cars,” she said, envisioning a Fun-Lan past. “When it first opened in the ‘50s, they had a miniature train for the kids that circled the

After this final shift, her and her son will be jobless.

Over the past two years, the sometimes 60-hour weeks and not receiving overtime or any pay for work over 40 hours really upset Stanford, who worked at Fun-Lan for $13 an hour. But when asked if there was a bright side to working there, the community of vendors and workers at Fun-Lan, which had become like a family to her, came to the forefront of her mind.

“Kids of the vendors who were tiny when they first got here...we watched them grow up,” Stanford said.

DRIVE-BY: You can no longer pull into Fun-Lan for a good time.

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 27

Learn traditional printmaking Workshops in - Etching - Lithography - Letterpress - Silkscreen and more.

Our gallery space has local and handmade gifts Drop by during normal hours Tuesday thru Friday 11-4 Saturday 11-6 • Sunday 12-4

Unknown Maker, American, Pieced Quilt (detail), c. 1850, Cotton with cotton thread, Collection of Linda McCormick Felts

28 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

continued from page 27 He was chastised for flying a Confederate flag at his Swap Shop and Thunderbird Drive-In in Fort Lauderdale, which is still in operation. He responded that it was a “joke” to get a reaction.

He died in 2017.

Betty has been the final decision maker on the property since he passed, but, “No one talks to her,” Snell says, adding that she’s never seen or heard from Henn in her five years of working there.

Temporary Manager of Florida Swap Shops Jerry Corgnati—who’s been with the company since 1980 as a theater engineer and has been filling in as manager since August—said Betty was in Las Vegas on vacation, and couldn’t be reached for comment on the sale of Fun-Lan. He did, however, reach out to Tom Chitwood—Betty Henn’s brotherin-law—who arranged the sale. Chitwood told him that he knows who the buyer is, but as part of the sale agreement, he couldn’t release that information yet, nor could he speak to the amount the property was purchased for.

The former employees of Fun-Lan said that they heard unconfirmed rumors that the property sold for $15 million.

They also speculated about the City of Tampa buying the property, but Communications Director Adam Smith said the city didn’t purchase it. Smith added that the city is open to partnerships to establish more affordable housing in the area. While he couldn’t speak to who bought the property, Corgnati did talk about the glory days of Fun-Lan, saying that at one point the parking lot would fill up with around a 1,000 attendees, all there to see the newest film. Several people have told him that they saw the premiere of “Star Wars” at Fun-Lan in 1977.

These boom days were back in the ‘50s-’70s he says, but in the ‘80s, ‘90s and ‘2000s, people began having more choices of how and where to view films, and attendance began to decline.

And even though Fun-Lan was a safer theatre for people to go to during COVID-19, the pandemic really affected the swap shop business, Fun-Lan’s main income, and the theater never quite recovered.

While employees got eight days notice that their livelihoods would be upended, vendors at the swap shop only got three. They were blindsided.

Robert Rivera was a vendor at Fun-Lan for seven years, and first started going there as a kid. He sold video games, and it helped pay for his house and his car. He chose to be a permanent vendor, which means he could sell at the flea market from Thursday-Sunday for $125 a month.

But he opted to be a Saturday and Sunday vendor because it was busier on those days.

Rivera held back tears when he found out that the market would close on Sunday, ending his business there, along with around 300 vendors.

“I didn’t want to believe it at first,” he said.

“I heard a lot of people were crying. I felt like crying too, but I wanted to be a strong person for others in that moment.”

The Wednesday after Fun-Lan shut down, vendors looked toward Plant City Farm and Flea Market to find an answer to their problem (read more below).

“It was mayhem when they arrived, there were over 100 new vendors,” Stephanie Allred, whose family runs Plant City Farm and Flea Market, told CL. “But we wanted to give these people a place to go.”

While they couldn’t make accommodations for everyone that showed up last Wednesday, the flea market is now extending hours to be open on the weekend, starting on Saturday, Dec. 11. They’re offering pay-what-you-can prices to the vendors for about a month until a new sales base finds them, and they’re also interested in hiring former employees of Fun-Lan, including Snell and Stanford.

Memory lane When CL broke the news of Fun-Lan closing on Dec. 8, hundreds of Facebook users shared their memories. Many wrote about cheap movies they saw there with family, loved ones and friends. It was a place people could go who couldn’t afford a regular theater. In 1979, movies there were just $2.

“When I was an extremely broke single mom with three kids who could never afford to take them to the movies, we had many a drive-in jammies night in the back of my car!!!”

One commenter wrote.

“The kids loved it, and so did I.” Another commenter, Clark Brooks, worked as a projectionist at Fun-Lan, playing 35mm films in 2005; his experience behind the scenes was not so ideal. Brooks knew something was off when he went to the concession stand to get something to eat and asked the person working at the stand what was best.

“She looked up at one of the many security cameras and looked back at me and just kind of quietly shook her head as it indicate that nothing there was edible,” Brooks said.

After that, it was an uphill battle. He didn’t know when his paychecks would come in, and at one point waited three weeks for his late pay to come in. After five months, he was done with the place. Brooks got a better opportunity

JUSTIN GARCIA

LOCAL NEWS

“I felt like crying too, but I wanted to be a strong person for others in that moment.”

TALL ORDER: Fun-Lan manager Candy Snell, pictured with a massive screen, must now find new work during the holiday rush. to project at Tampa Theatre, which he loves.

Still, he has fond memories of working there.

He remembers showing a 2005 black-comedy, “The Devil’s Rejects,” and how fun it was to play that for the crowd.

“Even with all of the headaches, it was really something special to work at such an iconic drive-in,” Brooks said.

Fun-Lan was one of the last of its kind left in the Tampa Bay area. Classic drive-in aesthetics

and rock bottom prices for flea market shoppers and vendors are a specialty in Florida, but as the COVID-19 pandemic ravaged the nation, many such places have fallen to the wayside.

One by one over the pandemic, flea markets like Fun-Lan’s have collapsed. Big Top, Wagon Wheel, Fowler Avenue Flea market. Fun-Lan’s fall means that the list of places to barter for goods in the Tampa Bay just keeps shrinking. continued on page 32

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 29

DINE IN • PICK UP • CURBSIDE

HAPPY HOUR IN THE BAR AREA TUESDAY-SUNDAY 5-7 WINE DOWN WEDNESDAY HALF OFF SELECT BOTTLES • DAILY HANDMADE PASTA AND BREAD • FRESH LOCALLY-SOURCED PRODUCE AND SEAFOOD • VEGAN CHICKEN PARM AND VEGAN PIZZAS WE ARE CLOSED ON MONDAYS.

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TACO TU EsDAY 200 E MADISON ST • DOWNTOWN TAMPA • 813-221-TACO

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 31

Drive-ins aren’t safe from failing either. Just this week, owners of Ruskin Family Drive-In told Bay News 9 that it is in danger of shutting down due to nearby development.

Oldsmar Flea Market carries on, and also holds an indelible place in Tampa Bay’s memory, but Oldsmar has grown exponentially with each new market closure. Snell said a lot of the vendors who came to Fun-Lan can’t afford the monthly prices there.

The monthly vendor prices for booths at the market can be around $400, more than triple what vendors like Rivera paid. However, the monthly booths at Oldsmar are high quality and many booths are indoors, as opposed to the open air market of Fun-Lan. For outdoor daily tables, vendors can pay $25 if they can reserve in time, but those go fast, according to Oldsmar Flea Market staff.

And so, those who made a living at FunLan search for their next destination, some headed to Plant City, others eyeing Oldsmar if they can afford it, some considering leaving the Tampa Bay area to Lakeland’s “Mi Pueblo” Flea Market and Webster’s “Swap-O-Rama” Flea Market.

While questions still remain about who bought Fun-Lan and what will be built in its place, the former vendors and employees are mainly focused on survival. Stanford said it was a “monumental” place to work, but now her and everyone else have to scramble to figure out what’s next during the holidays.

“Merry Christmas to us,” she said.

Read follow up coverage below.

JUSTIN GARCIA

continued from page 29

Plant City Farm & Flea Market adds weekend hours to accommodate displaced Fun-Lan vendors Starting last Saturday Dec. 11—and for the first time ever—Plant City Farm and Flea Market opened gates on the weekend. Officials at the Plant City Flea told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that the unprecedented move open on Saturday and Sunday is in response to an overflow of vendors displaced when Tampa’s Fun-Lan Drive-In and Swap Shop shut down earlier this week.

Stephanie Allred, whose family runs the flea market—located at 708 W Sam Allen Rd. in Plant City—said that the gates will open at 7 a.m. Saturday and Sunday. Vendors can arrive at 6 a.m. if they like, she says. The flea market will close when the last vendors leave, sometime in the afternoon. There are 600 vendor spaces at the flea market, and no pre-registration will be required as this effort to help Fun-Lan vendors gets underway.

Allred said a pay-what-you-can model for displaced vendors setting up at the Saturday and Sunday market should run for around a month, until they can establish a customer base.

FLAVOR SAVER: Stories about the Fun-Lan concession are… interesting.

“No charge will be required, but people can pay whatever they can afford to help with cleanup and staffing,” Allred added. The Plant City market—founded in 1978—was usually open only on Wednesdays until now, and it’ll still charge their normal price for vendors on that day, ranging from $10-$15 for a spot.

On Dec. 2, Fun-Lan vendors were given three days notice about Fun-Lan’s closure.

Displaced vendors just wanted anywhere to go, and that’s when Allred’s father put out feelers on social media to see if people wanted the market to be open on the weekends. The post got an overwhelmingly positive response from customers and former Fun-Lan vendors alike.

More than anything, the family just wants to help those who need help after having to leave Fun-Lan last minute. “It was mayhem when the vendors showed up on Wednesday, there were around 100 new vendors and we had to turn some away,” Allred said. “But now, we’re extending hours because we want to give these people a place to go.”

LOCAL NEWS

32 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

Allred said that the flea market is also interested in hiring former employees from Fun-Lan. Tampa artist collective Crab Devil will preserve Fun-Lan’s iconic entrance sign On Monday morning, members of the Crab Devil art collective showed up to Tampa’s recentlyshuttered Fun-Lan Drive-In and Swap Shop to take on the daunting task of preserving its iconic front entrance sign. They brought trucks full of tools and a flatbed trailer and began dismantling and inspecting the sign.

Getting it to come apart and move safely is easier said than done.

Dave Kibby told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that he’s never seen anything like the task at hand, and several other workers were trying to figure out how to best take apart and move the sign to Crab Devil’s location at 3800 N Nebraska Ave. in Ybor Heights.

The body of the sign was there since the beginning of Fun-Lan and is 71-years-old,

Fun-Lan manager Jerry Corgnati told CL. Since then, there have been some additions like neon lighting and the digital sign that projected Fun-Lan’s farewell message, “Merry Christmas & Happy New Year we will miss you...”

Corgnati told CL contributor Kelly Benjamin—who helped arrange the preservation of the sign—that Crab Devil should take it for free in order to avoid its destruction. The combination of old parts with added electrical components present a challenge to the Crab Devil workers, but they’re hoping to get the entire project done by today, if not, by tomorrow.

Once the sign makes it back to Crab Devil’s compound, future plans may include propping the sign up high on a shipping container above Crab Devil’s “Peninsularium” immersive art attraction so it can be seen from Nebraska Avenue, highlighting the project’s goal of being, “Cooler than a museum, smarter than a theme park, weirder than a carnival.”

“Even with all of the headaches, it was really something special to work at such an iconic drive-in.”

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34 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

“I employed the notion of film noir—cynicism, unease—yet there’s still a sense of positivity.”

PROFILES

MUSIC WEEK

The time is now

Decorated composer Chuck Owen releases seventh Jazz Surge album, then ‘retires.’

By Eric Snider

I

t’s all but impossible to state definitively which Tampa Bay artist has notched the most Grammy nominations, but a good bet is Chuck Owen. Between him and his Jazz Surge band, he has seven.

Awards like Best Arrangement, Instrumental or A Cappella; Best Instrumental Composition; and the plum thus far—Best Large Ensemble Jazz Album for 2017’s Whispers in the Wind—are not deemed sexy enough for the Grammy TV broadcast. But they’re pinnacle achievements in Owen’s chosen milieu.

Then there’s the nagging little issue of Owen never having won. “Well, there is that,” he says wryly, but you sense that his lack of statuettes does not give him too much agita. “It’s not why we do it,” he says of Grammy recognition. “But it is nice—especially seeing as we’re not in New York or L.A.—to know that people value what we do.”

Owen, 67, ran the jazz program at USF from 1981 to his retirement this year. The composer/arranger operates in a subgenre of jazz commonly called big band— which often gets a bad rap, and often deservedly so. The music at its most fundamental is characterized by a large, specific configuration of horns combined with a smaller rhythm section.

At its worst, big band music is strident, marked by blaring horn-section parts and generally short solos—which are played mostly on horns.

It swings in a rote, archaic fashion.

This is not the kind of music Chuck Owen & Jazz Surge make.

The “big band” tag tends to repel most jazz enthusiasts, myself included. At the onset of our interview, I told Owen, who I’ve known casually for quite some time, that I “hate big band, but I actually like your new album quite a lot.” (He responded with a knowing laugh.) Within Us, released in September, has served to pry open my mind to the genre’s potential.

“I think ‘orchestral jazz’ might be a better way to put it,” Owen posits. “Plus I’m not sure that people under 50 even know what big band is.”

Owen’s orchestral jazz is complex and challenging, but melodic and intrinsically listenable.

It employs a panoply of rhythms beyond swing.

The music incorporates elements of classical,

rock, blues, Latin and more, and features a consistently intriguing flow of texture and color.

There are solos aplenty, of course, but it’s not the music’s raison d’etre, as it is in small-group jazz.

Owen also breaks from big-band orthodoxy by featuring atypical instruments: two guitars, violin, Dobro, accordion, hammer dulcimer, harmonica.

The process Owen employs to create his opuses is long and painstaking. It generally starts with an overarching concept. Within Us celebrates Jazz Surge’s 25th anniversary “by looking back on this band and our accomplishments and various milestones,” Owen says. Within that larger idea, however, is “American Noir,” a tune that contemplates “the political climate, the lack of sense of what truth is, and how a lot of things don’t seem very American,” Owen says. “So I employed the notion of film noir— cynicism, unease—yet there’s still a sense of positivity.”

Owen writes the pieces alone, using a piano and score paper, never audio-recording any of his ideas. “I’m a penciland-paper person,” he says, with a hint of pride.

The compositions often include several movements, each with a discreet melody.

Owen then pens arrangements for his 20-plus-person ensemble. He makes a flurry of decisions about how instruments combine at any point in the piece, be it a full flourish of horns, a creamy blend of just trombones and alto flutes, a shimmering solo violin, a quiet transition into another phase, a splash into a crescendo, and on and on. Question, questions: What’s the rhythmic feel? Where do the solos go and with what instrument? When does the ensemble come back in and in what configuration?

It all amounts to creating a gargantuan sonic jigsaw puzzle. “At this point I’m hearing the orchestra in my head while I’m at the piano,” he explains. Owen then writes out a score of every part for every instrument—so, y’know, each musician will know what to play. “During COVID, I started taking long walks most days,” he says. “And I used those walks to sing through the pieces”—not out loud, in his head—“‘How should this sound and where should it go?’ It’s great to step away from the piano and sing it from front to back.”

How long does this arduous series of tasks take? “Forever,” Owen quips. His magnum opus, 2013’s River Runs: A Concerto for Jazz Guitar, Saxophone and Orchestra, took a year-and-ahalf, much of it eight-hour days.

Owen then has to organize the recording session, usually at Morrisound Studios in Tampa.

Co-owner Tom Morris has engineered all of the band’s sessions from the beginning. About a third of the pros in Jazz Surge come in from

out of state, so Owen has to arrange scheduling and travel. A day of rehearsal is about all Owen can count on. Then it’s on to the business of recording—all 20-plus musicians playing live in real time. Within Us required about 18 hours over three days, a remarkably efficient use of time considering the complexity of the music and size of the ensemble. continued on page 37

LOCAL MUSIC

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GOLDEN GETTER: We can’t think of a Tampa Bay musician with more Grammy nominations than Chuck Owen.

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 35

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VINTAGE CHUCK: Dave Stamps (L) and Chuck Owen at the original USF Center for Jazz Composition circa 2004. continued from page 35 Big break Chuck Owen got his very first break in music thanks to a high school band director who didn’t give a shit. Owen played piano and trombone, and was part of the jazz big band at Wyoming High School in Cincinnati. “In my junior year we got a new band director who disdained the jazz ensemble,” he recalls. “He basically turned it over to the students.”

At that time, the early-‘70s, a more handson director would likely have drilled his band in the fusty swing-era styles of Glenn Miller, Benny Goodman and the like.

Instead, Owen recalls, “the senior who had taken over the band said, ‘Chuck, would you write some more modern stuff ?’ I had never done it, but I knew [music] theory, so I figured ‘why not?’ I was kind of a shy, risk-averse kid in many respects, but in this case I was willing to take on the risks.”

Owen pored over the horn-driven rock of Chicago, Blood, Sweat & Tears, and Earth, Wind & Fire, writing arrangements of their songs for the 18-piece high school band. “I was essentially listening to the horns from the records and sorting them out, transcribing what

I heard,” he explains. “There wasn’t anything terribly creative going on.”

Owen took over informal directorship of the ensemble in his senior year, which meant conducting its performances. “Looking back, I was terrible, but at the time, I thought I was doing a pretty good job, being showy with it,” he recounts. “I had my paisley bell bottoms and ruffled shirts, and was up on a pedestal.

After one concert, the choral conductor came to me afterward and said, ‘I enjoyed the concert, especially the way the lights glimmered off your open fly.’”

Owen and his parents made the usual college visits, one of them at Indiana University, where they met with a music professor who told them, “No matter what you do, don’t become a music major.”

“I just wasn’t confident enough to argue with my parents about going to music school,” Owen recalls. “The notion was that music was a tough life. I bought into that, too.”

He matriculated at College of Wooster, a private liberal arts institution an hour south of Cleveland, as a biology/premed major. That lasted a year. He then transferred to North Texas State University, one of the largest jazz incubators in

LOCAL MUSIC

the country. A whole universe opened up. “The talent pool when I was there was remarkable,” Owen recalls. “When I wrote for big bands, I’d finish writing a chart and it was played the next day by one of the [college’s] several bands. There’s no better way for a writer to learn.”

In deference to his parents, Owen signed on as a music education major, although, he says, “the last thing I wanted to do was be a public school music teacher.” The curriculum required him to learn a wide array of instruments—the goal being that he become just proficient enough to teach the basics to students. Oboe gave him the most problems, but he dug the bassoon. That basic training, he says, helped him hear in his head how instruments fit together.

Because Owen wanted to write for films, he entered Cal State Northridge near Los Angeles as a grad student, putting him closer to the action. While there, he interned for the prodigious TV composer Patrick Williams, who threw him a few bones writing pieces for the likes of “Lou Grant” (1977-1982) and “The Last Resort”

(1979-1980). As a freelancer, Owen penned a couple of tunes for “The Tonight Show” band (Doc Severinson was the leader, Johnny Carson the host) to play in and out of commercials. “I did see a little check for that,” Owen muses.

He also led his own big band in L.A., the most rewarding part of his tenure there.

Ultimately, even the smidgen of composing he did for television showed Owen that the process was too formulaic for him. “I’m a more reflective writer, and working in TV you crank it out,” he says. “The timeline is very quick and you have to meet the desires of several other people.”

Owen says he never got the opportunity to write music for film.

It was the early-‘80s, and Owen was married with an infant daughter when he heard about a job opening at the USF music school. “I loved the idea of both academia and composing,” he reflects. “And my wife at the time really wanted out of L.A. The USF job looked ideal.”

It turned out to be so.

Owen joined USF as assistant professor/ director of jazz studies in 1981. Looking back, he says, “I’d say my biggest accomplishment was constructing a jazz studies curriculum and bringing in adjunct faculty.”

Owen had a fulfilling and productive career at USF—ascending to Distinguished University Professor—and played a key role in the university becoming a well-respected institution of jazz education.

Owen frequently deals with the misconception that Jazz Surge is a university band, consisting of students. Not so. As such, Owen has had to finance his projects. He’s become expert at landing grants, but also has to reach into his own pocket to help pay the musicians, for studio time and other expenses. Owen says the budgets for the Jazz Surge projects have generally ranged from $25,000 to over $50,000. River Runs reached into six figures. And it should be noted: These numbers do not factor in the countless hours that Owen personally pours into each project.

“If I kept track of the number of hours for these projects, I’d probably never write another note,” he says with a chuckle.

Owen decided to retire from his USF post, because, “I’m in good health and want the chance to do other things that were shunted aside because I didn’t have the time—music projects, playing piano, getting out in nature, spending more time with my [five] grandkids. I’ve been working on a young adult novel for a year and a jazz composition book. I now have the time to do this stuff. And I can afford to do it. I’m healthy and alert and energetic. The time is now.”

Spoken like a man who may have left his regular day gig, but has most certainly not retired.

“If I kept track of the number of hours for these projects, I’d probably never write another note.”

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 37

THU DECEMBER 16–WED DECEMBER 22

C

CL Recommends

THU 16

Tommy Prine Tommy learned music from his dad, John, who happens to be one of the greatest musicians to have ever lived. John, who kept a home in Gulfport, died in April of 2020, so it’s Tommy’s turn. Though Tommy has been playing the guitar since he was 10, the singer-songwriter’s debut album is coming out any day now. Tommy plays songs about “growing up, falling in love, and losing his father” at a sold-out show inside the still-open Hideaway Cafe. Here’s to hoping he plays a song or two from pops’ catalog.

(Hideaway Cafe, St. Petersburg)

FRI 17

Caustic Casanova w/Thunderclap/ Path of Increased Difference/Tension Electric Gainesville’s Thunderclap is back in town after playing New Port Richey’s Monufest in October. The CL favorite and doom-rock trio opens for D.C. “prog punk / psych sludge” outfit Caustic Casanova at this West River venue that’s proving to be one of the best places to see diverse acts, both national and local. The show also marks the first gig for Tension Electric, a new project from singer-songwriter Jeff Brawer, Phil Stanwick and Russ Jovin. Tampa math-rock outfit Path of Increased Difference fills out the loud lineup. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa) C Circle Jerks w/Municipal Waste/ Negative Approach OG punk band Circle Jerks is touring for the first time in 15 years, making a whole lot of middle-aged people excited to relive their mosh pit days. Two original members—Keith Morris (Black Flag, All!) and Greg Hetson (Redd Kross)—bring the Los Angeles band to St. Petersburg for an all-ages Friday night show. Old-school Detroit hardcore outfit Negative Approach and Richmond thrash band Municipal Waste open. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg) C David Foster w/Katharine McPhee/ Pia Toscano/Shelea Frazier/Fernando Varela Grammy-award winning songwriter and producer Foster moves to performing position, and if you’re a child of the 80s, or just a film buff in general, the 72-year-old provided your life’s soundtrack, including Peter Cetera’s hit “Glory of Love” from “Karate Kid II.” Helping Foster perform his catalog of hits are “American Idol” Pia Toscano, Quincy Jones protégée Shelea Frazier, and Fernando Varela from “America’s Got Talent.” Foster’s wife, and another “Idol” alum, Katharine McPhee opens the Friday night show. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater) Jazz with Jim feat. Liz Antony Retired music professor Jim Burge—on saxophone

38 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

and flute—leads his Jazz Directions band in this installment of this “Jazz With Jim” concert series in the suburbs. Joining the Directions— which includes keyboardist Ron Delp, drummer Jeff Hanson and Mike Ruven on bass—is vocalist Liz Antony. Except big band standards and maybe a holiday tune or two. Masks are recommended for the unvaxxed. (Carrollwood Cultural Center, Tampa)

SAT 18

Boots N Catz: KC Gilmore w/Nate Verde/Tommy Rize/more The Bricks is getting into the EDM action this week with promoters Boots N Catz hosting a “Pop Up” at the Ybor City restaurant-venue. DJs KC Gilmore, Nate Verde, and Tommy Rize go until 2 a.m. at this 21 and up event. Per usual, more electronic dancing happens at The Ritz down the street with Tanner Petulla, aka California DJ known as Getter, and Codes on Friday and Saturday night, respectively. (The Bricks, Ybor City) Jim Chambers Music Box Presents Jingle Box: Hello Sister w/The Last Nerv/Boycott/Saturation//The Perps/ The Strikes Chambers’ Music Box— way cooler than your average kid’s music school—presents its annual “Jingle Box” show with six young bands hitting the stage.

Orlando sister trio, and recent “America’s Got Talent” contestant, Hello Sister headline the all-ages Skipper’s Smokehouse show.

If you’re looking for more grown up jams, the North Tampa venue continues to book solid national acts and has revived its weekly Uncle John’s Band every Thursday. Whatever your taste, just appreciate the beloved spot a little more now, since we almost lost it.

(Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa) C Preson Phillips w/Rillian Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s Best Non-Insane Pastor is losing his drummer, so this no cover gig in Old Seminole Heights is the last chance to catch a band that’s released two albums of righteous, worship-ready music disguised as indie-folk. We suspect that Phillips will still get behind his beat up Takamine and play songs after this, but no one will ever provide a backbeat the way Mickey Olaf Holm, who’s moving to Tennessee, did.

(Corner Club, Tampa) C The Wandering Hours w/The Stillhouse Shakers/Deb Ruby Locals have had a long time to fall in love with The Wandering Hours, and the Best of the Baywinning roots music outfit has a new record to help say, “We love you back.” From the Mountains to the Sea is the debut full-length from the Hours which seamlessly blends string band vibes into a modern, harmonydriven sound that would also feel just at home played on those old 78s your grandpappy kept in his closet. The Stillhouse Shakers add to the Smithsonian Folkways vibes on this show

which features Deb Ruby on support, too.

(Cage Brewing, St. Petersburg)

SUN 19

C DJ Snoopadelic w/ Don Pablo/Joey Franchize/Prankstisci La-da-da-dadah. It’s the motherfuckin’ D-O-double-G. Snoop Dogg! Yep, that’s right. The one and only Snoop Dogg flexe his DJ muscles as Snoopadelic for an unofficial Buccaneers pregame party on the causeway. Though the event starts at noon and goes until 8 p.m. (right before the 8:20 p.m. game start) Snoop is only on the decks from 4 p.m-5 p.m. So don’t blink or go to your car to smoke a blunt because you might miss him. Don Pablo, Joey Franchize, and Prankstisci fill in the rest of the event. General admission is $25, but VIP for $40 gets your closet to the DJ booth.

And that’s realer than Real-Deal Holyfield.

(WTR at the Godfrey Hotel, Tampa) The Paper Airport w/Neverless/Riffed/ Mortal Sons Promoter Healthy Phoenix brings local indie rock outfit The Paper Airport (FKA as FAM), which arrives at the New World music hall armed with headbopping high-energy jams like “Old Friend,” which was released over the summer. The 18 & up show also has Mortal Sons on the lineup, which arrives with a sound that’s

much more chill and groovy than the band’s metal-ish moniker leads you to believe.

More genre-bending on the lineup comes from Sarasota ska-pop punk outfit Neverless and pop-rock trio Riffed. (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa) C Mtvh1n1 w/Charles Irwin/Clang!

Over the years, individuals associated with Mtvh1n1 have played a part in some of the most memorable DIY concert moments in Tampa, and some magic is probably in store Sunday at the Legion when the Tampa artpop outfit reunites to play songs from its surprise self-titled summer album. Get there early, too, as the bill features two of Tampa’s best bands, Clang! and Charles Irwin, which respectively cover the heaviest and poppiest parts of the local indie-rock scene. (American Legion Seminole Post 111, Tampa) C Trans-Siberian Orchestra It’s been four years since the death of Tampa resident and Trans-Siberian Orchestra founder Paul O’Neill, but the band has soldiered on. On Sunday, the group plays two shows to celebrates the 25th anniversary of its Christmas Eve and Other Stories album. A press release promises favorites like “Ornament,” “Promises To Keep,” “This Christmas Day,” plus a second set with Trans-Siberian Orchestra hits and crowd-pleases like “Christmas Canon,” “Wizards In Winter” and many more. (Amalie Arena, Tampa)

The Wandering Hours

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A press release from Live Nation says Ziggy Marley will play support on the Tampa date. Support on other stops of the tour will come from Ben Harper & the Innocent Criminals, Lake Street Dive, Durand Jones & the Indications, and Ron Artis II & Thunderstorm Artis. The released added that $2 from every ticket sold will be split between carbon offset projects and organizations that have partnered with Johnson’s

All At Once nonprofit, which supports environmental projects, plastic-free initiatives and food security efforts.

Per usual, Johnson’s Tampa date finds him working with promoters to let concert goers bring their own refillable water bottle and also source local farmers when preparing rider items. The only other Florida show on the three-month run is at West Palm Beach’s iThink amphitheatre on Aug. 18.

Jack Johnson w/Ziggy Marley Friday, Aug. 19. 7:15 p.m. $41.50 & up. MIDFLORIDA Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa. See more of Josh Bradley’s new concert roundup below.—Ray Roa

CeeLo Green w/Laidback Luke Friday, Dec. 31. 9 p.m. $49-$69. Downtown Eden, Tampa

Josh Groban w/The Florida Orchestra Saturday, Feb. 5. 7 p.m. $75-$300. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg

Sickick w/DJ Drama Saturday, Jan. 1. 9 p.m. $59-$79. Downtown Eden, Tampa

The Warning Wednesday, Feb. 16. 6:30 p.m. $19. Orpheum, Ybor City

Open Culture w/Blonde Gentlemen (debut show)/A Rainy Night In Friday, Jan. 28. 10 p.m. Free. The Bends, St. Petersburg

Reverend Horton Heat w/Hillbilly Casino Friday, Mar. 4. 8 p.m. $18. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Thelma & The Sleaze w/TBA Tuesday, Feb. 8. 7 p.m. $10. Hooch and Hive, Tampa A Creepy Little Christmas Party feat.

Monk/Brian Busto/Sophee/Michael Kean B2B Strangeways/Lee-O/more Saturday, Dec. 18. 9 p.m. $26. The Castle, Ybor City Lee Foss Saturday, Jan. 15. 10 p.m. $15$20. The Ritz, Ybor City Selwyn Birchwood Friday, Jan. 21. 8 p.m. $22-$40. Hough Hall at Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg Ilan Bluestone Saturday, Jan. 22. 10 p.m. $15. The Ritz, Ybor City Tab Benoit w/Alastair Greene Sunday, Jan. 30. 8:00 p.m. $30. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Uncle Acid & The Deadbeats w/King Buffalo Wednesday, Mar. 9. 7 p.m. $25$100. The Ritz, Ybor City The English Beat Monday, Mar. 21. 7:30 p.m. $29-$45. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater

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cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 41

42 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

Tell me it’s real

By Caroline DeBruhl

Dear Oracle, I’m traveling to New York City with my boyfriend of three months for Christmas!

Although I am very excited to share this magical time in a city I love with a man that I have fallen in love with, I am nervous about going. Would you be able to give me some tarot guidance and insight on the upcoming magical trip? Fingers crossed!—Nervous for NYC Cards: Eight of Swords, Ten of Pentacles reversed, The World, Eight of Cups Dear NYC, short answer: I think the trip will go well. Long answer: I think this trip will be healing for you and deepen your relationship. The first card in the spread is Eight of Swords, which can be a card of all the negative self-thoughts and feeling hemmed in. In a relationship spread, it can feel like you’re trapped.

However, in this spread, I wonder if you feel like you’ve “trapped” your boyfriend somehow and that you don’t deserve to feel love.

The Ten of Pentacles is a card about family and can be the stage where we play out the stories we believe about our family lives. If it’s a negative story, it can feel like we’ll always be cast to play that role. I wonder if you have a past where you felt either rejected or abandoned by family or put into situations where you felt like you had to earn your love. If you were, I am deeply sorry. Children should never

have to believe that—and neither should the adults they become.

But those negative self-thoughts don’t have to last. We do have the Eight of Cups, which is walking away from what you’ve known.

In this case, I think the two Eights speak to each other. You can abandon this idea that you aren’t good enough, that you’ve somehow tricked your boyfriend into being with you. We have The World smack-dab in the middle of this spread; it’s a card of Anima Mundi—“the world soul”—and is the card of interconnection and creation.

This interconnection lets us see two contradictory things as one—for example, the need for change and the need for self-acceptance.

You can love yourself, be kind to yourself, and understand where you came from and why you feel the way you do, but you can also move towards a different self-image, one of a person who deserves love.

The World is very much a card of rejuvenation and allows us to be reborn in a sense. It can be this spark that leads to a new chapter in your life—one where you can feel on equal footing in love and be able to pursue this relationship (and every relationship, romantic and platonic) without this lingering doubt there. Best of luck, my dear. I hope you have a wonderful trip.

Dear Oracle, due to various factors, I won’t be able to see my family this year, and I’m having a hard time feeling festive because of it. I’ve only ever spent Christmas alone one other time, and that was pretty depressing. So is there any way to get into the Yuletide spirit while being alone in sunny, hot Florida?—Blue Christmas

a hand with Christmas lights, or your newparents friends could use some babysitting, or your teenage cousin needs someone to vent to.

Community, generosity, and being a light in the dark is what the holiday season is about, and helping others might also help you with your Christmas blues.

Cards: Six of Cups, Six of Pentacles, Queen of Wands Dear Blue, I think there is a two-pronged approach to getting you into the festive spirit. First, we have the Six of Cups, which is a card of nostalgia, particularly of childhood. What were your family traditions growing up that put you in the mood? Singing carols? Baking family recipes?

Watching a specific movie? See if you can find a couple of things and try to do them mindfully. Maybe bake the same recipe over Zoom with your sister or watch ”Die Hard” with your dad.

The second approach is to get into the giving spirit. The Six of Pentacles is often a card for charity, and The Queen of Wands is a warm and giving person who also got a bit of a mama bear streak. Who could use some generosity and warmth? It might be someone in your life; it might be strangers. If you’ve never volunteered before, it can feel a little daunting to know where to start. But, trust me, organizations know how to put people to work, so pick an organization you’d like to help and reach out to see what they need.

Also, check-in with people in your own life. Maybe your elderly neighbor could use

Dear Oracle, is there a Santa Claus?—Virginia

ORACLE OF YBOR

Yes, Virginia, there is. There’s also a whole slew of other Yule-tide spirits. There’s The Holly King, who slew the sun-bringing Oak King and plunged the World into darkness. He’s at the height of his dark power on the winter solstice and, in some Wiccan households, is the bringer of gifts to many little witchlings during Yule.

Of course, there’s also big boy Krampus, who haunts the Alpine region and beats naughty kids with a switch while reigning mischief on villagers. There’s also Turon, a terrifying Polish folk spirit who hits people with his large, dislocated skeleton jaw, but also uses it like a castanet to keep rhythm to Christmas carols.

Baby Yaga haunts the wintery woods of Russia, moving along on her mortar and pestle.

At the same time, over in Scotland and Ireland, Cailleach Bhéara was the harsh mistress of winter and wolves.

What I’m saying is there are plenty of midwinter beings to delight and terrify you if you want to believe.

Send your questions to oracle@cltampa.com or DM @theyboracle on Instagram.

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 43

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Quickies

columns. I do not give a rat’s ass about the sex lives of strangers. If you do not reevaluate your content, I shall not continue to read.—Disgusted

By Dan Savage

My wife and I are in a great ENM marriage.

We have two couples that we are friends with and get together regularly for sex, and we each pursue solo FWB relationships. During COVID, we started posting pictures on Reddit, which were well received. This morphed into my wife starting an OnlyFans account because why not?

So, at what point do we spill the beans to our FWBs? We don’t show our faces on OnlyFans, we use fake names, and we only post content made with people that know it’s going up on OnlyFans.

Is this just “our secret” and doesn’t hurt anyone, so, who cares? Or do our FWBs have a right to know?—Posting Intimate Content You’re under no obligation to tell your casual sex partners that you have an OnlyFans account where you share photos and videos you make with your other casual sex partners. OnlyFans seems like something you should be able to share with your FWBs, but “you should be able to” ≠ “you are obliged to.”

start my entire life over again. I’ve settled into a new home with a new job and I’m trying to be a badass about the whole situation. But it’s been a lot. I’ve gone back and forth on when to start dating again. I feel mounting pressure to “get back out there” and I’m on the apps again but I bail about a week into every new flirtation. Why am I hesitating?—Balking At Love, Knowing I’m Nervous, Gah! Hm… my guess is you might be hesitating, BALKING, because your soon-to-be-ex-husband stomped on your heart and turned your life upside down LESS THAN SIX MONTHS AGO. And you’re doing great: you got a new place to live, you got a new job, and you recently got back on the apps. Maybe you’re not ready to start dating again right this minute but getting back on the apps is a sign you will be soon. Lowering the temperature with the guys you’re connecting with online might help (be chatty, not flirty), as will keeping the stakes low on those first dates when you are ready (a quick coffee, not a dinner). You can do this!

Cis-het Black woman. I have been working on myself for a while and a side effect of that is now I have standards and I am unwilling to settle for mediocre partners. For me a quality partner is a cis or trans man (a penis haver) who is an ally to equality movements (sex, gender, race, etc.), emotionally healthy, kink-positive, and can afford their own life. Where does one find a person who meets these criteria? I’ve tried Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, and FetLife, etc., with no luck.—Never Gonna Settle There is no settling down without some settling for. If you’re lucky, you’ll meet someone who comes close enough to what you want—an employed penis-having person, for instance, who’s an ally to equality movements everywhere but isn’t exactly kink-positive but has an open mind and could get there. Or an emotionally healthy, kink-positive penis-having student who isn’t rolling in dough right now but has a realistic career plan. And where do you find that guy? Well, you might get lucky and find him on one of the sites you’re already on—keep those profiles up and updated—or you might get lucky and meet him through friends, at work, in a bar, etc. Keep at it, NGS, because you never know when your bad luck is going to run out.

I’m a 34-year-old female and my husband (of only two years!) blindsided me by asking for a separation on my birthday in June and a divorce via text message a month later. We owned a home and ran a business together.

Needless to say… this all sucks. I’ve had to

I recently read this in your column: “PIV or PIT or PIB.” OK, I know PIV (“penis in vagina”).

But the other two?

I’ve been reading you for years and I’m stumped on this!—Creative A c r o n y m s T o t a l l y Confound Him

I am a 24-year-old woman in a mostly happy marriage. My husband is not interested in oral sex. At all. Not giving it, not receiving it. In previous relationships this was the way I most consistently achieved orgasm. I miss this type of intimacy so much I’m now curious about the legality of putting peanut butter on myself in hopes that my dog would come up to me on his own—unforced—and lick it off. I imagine this to be no different legally than a dog eating something out of your hand. I haven’t done it. But I am curious about your opinion. If you have other recommendations on how to get the specific sensation of oral sex when you don’t have a willing partner, I welcome your advice.—Disgusting Obsession Grosses Girl Out You’re 24 years old and your sex life with your husband is so miserably unsatisfying that you’re seriously thinking about tricking your dog into eating you out, which is illegal in lots

JOE NEWTON

SAVAGE LOVE

If you just finished reading your letter, D, and you’re reading my response now… you’re gonna want to stop reading now. Because you’re really not gonna like the next couple of letters.

Hm… you probably could’ve worked this one out on your own, CACTH, if you’d given it a moment’s thought. Besides vaginas (PIV)… where else do penises go? PIT stands for “penis in throat” and PIB stands for “penis in butt.” I could’ve gone with PIM (“penis in mouth”) and PIA (“penis in ass”), I guess, but why not go for the rhyme? (Oh, and ENM means “ethical non-monogamy.”)

I just discovered your column. I’ve been reading you for a month. Four weeks, four disgusting

of places. (Since I don’t know where you live, DOGGO, you’ll have to Google it yourself.) My advice: put down the peanut butter and back away from it. Then get a divorce, get a lover (a human one), or get yourself one of those new clit-sucking sex toys that—according to the reviews I’ve read by clit-having people—do a

pretty amazing job of simulating the specific sensations of oral sex. Hell, get all three!

I have a question about urethral sounding.

My husband wanted me to do this to him for two years and I finally did. It was interesting! But I’m wondering what kind of harmful effects this could have if we were to do it long-term.—Making Enquiries About Taking Urethral Sounds Urethral sounding—sliding a well-lubed stainless-steel rod into someone’s urethra—is an actual medical procedure with legit medical purposes (also easily Googled!), but some people enjoy recreational sounding, both for how it feels (good, I’m told) and what it symbolizes (penetrating a penetrator’s penetrator). So long as you’re using sterilized sounds and sterile lube, you and your husband should be able to safely enjoy sounding on the regular. Besides upping his risk for the occasional UTIs, there’s not much risk of harm—so long as you don’t force it, you stop if there’s pain or blood, and you have access to an autoclave.

Someone assigned male at birth, with male genitalia, but on estrogen to feminize their appearance and identifies as trans-agender. Curious how to identify their sexuality. They are only attracted to people who identify as women or femme-nonbinary. So how does someone without gender define their sexuality if they are only attracted to one gender ident i t y?— N a r r o w Attractions Complicate Multifaceted Identity “ I t ’ s complicated.”

Also, I’m pretty sure lumping all “women or femmenonbinary” people into a single “gender identity” is incorrect.

(And would lead to a Title 9 complaint at Oberlin.) I mean, I’ve personally and biblically known gay men who identify as femmes and there are lots of femme-nonbinary people out there— AMAB, AFAB, ACAB—who would object to being lumped into a single category with mere women. It’s all so very, very complicated. Which is great, of course, because we can’t talk about climate change and the growing threat of authoritarianism all the time, right?

cltampa.com | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | 45

46 | DECEMBER 16 - 22, 2021 | cltampa.com

creative loafing puzzler MORE 63 PUN-ISHMENT 65

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