MUSIC ������������������������������������

Navin Ave. ‘Book 1- A Little Warming’ album release

w/Jeremy Gloff/Deb Ruby Saturday, Feb. 19, 8 p.m. No cover Hooch and Hive. 1001 W Cass St., Tampa @navinavenue on Facebook

REVIEWS PROFILES MUSIC WEEK

Warming feeling

Murder and moonshine are just two elements of the debut full-length from Navin Ave.

By Gabe Echazabal

Shae Krispinsky’s name should sound familiar to anyone with even a passing interest in the local arts and music scene. More commonly recognized for her folk-pop solo work, she’s also a writer of fiction, poetry, and music and she’s consistently served as one of the brightest and most captivating artists since her move to the area in the late 2000s.

In what’s arguably the most fascinating (and certainly the most ambitious) project the native Pennsylvanian has ever embarked on, Krispinsky and the band she fronts, Navin Ave., are about to release a debut album, Book 1- A Little Warming. As the title suggests, the band’s initial outing will serve as the first in a series of releases. Krispinsky and her husband and musical partner Derek Forrester told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay the album is the first installment in a trilogy of releases over which an ongoing story will unfold.

Some cuts go back to Krispinsky’s days with Forrester as part of the now defunct local band, ... Y Los Dos Pistoles. “Some of the songs didn’t fit that band, and then we broke up” Krispinsky reminisces.

Wisely opting to keep the songs in the hopper for use on a future project, the sometimes-bashful artist excitedly said that some of the inspiration for the project and its song concepts came in part from the 2015 HBO docu-series “The Jinx: The Lifes and Deaths of Robert Durst” (which chronicles the real-life murders committed by Durst, a serial killer). But it was a recent, odd encounter with an unwavering bird that inspired Krispinsky to push forward with the project. While exiting her vehicle at a local grocery store parking lot, she became intrigued while observing a resolute crow that just wouldn’t fly away.

“This has to mean something” she thought at the time. Intent on finding the relevance of this run-in with the stubborn avian, Krispinsky discovered that crows are regarded as the guardians of the underworld which sparked her creativity and helped her flesh out this musical venture.

As a landscape for this first chapter of the band’s musical saga, Krispinsky describes the scene as one that encapsulates a “Southern gothic” motif; that is, one rich with murder, moonshine, religion, fire, bayous and, yes, crows.

“It’s a journey through a section of America where she [the story’s central character] faces all the ways we have to kill off parts of ourselves in order to live in the world. As we grow, we have to kill off a part of who we are,” she explained. Pressing for more insight, and inquiring if she was referring to either an emotional or spiritual type of self-realization, Krispinsky acknowledged that both of those factors play significant roles in the characterization.

Movement and location are relevant to the scenery, too. “When I’m traveling, I’m always observing and noticing locations. Places and settings inspire me” Krispinsky admitted while detailing the changing locales that serve as backdrops for the progression of her musical

“I use the guitar as a call and response” he said in describing his approach for creating the musical accompaniment for the storyline. “It’s more of a coloring or feel than a guitar part. The idea is that it’s a second voice in a style that fits and supports the emotional context” he went on to say. “We play off each other’s strengths” Krispinsky added in comparing the solitude that is prevalent in authoring a novel versus recording an album with a group. In the capacity of songwriter, it’s common for Krispinsky to write acoustic melodies and then hash out rough demos for compositions before bringing them to the band. A sense of wonder and amazement is

BRYANT MARTINEZ

MOONSHINERS: (L-R) Navin Ave is Adam Revak, Shae Krispinsky, Derek Forrester, and Jeff Brawer.

novel. Book 1 opens in western Pennsylvania (the area from which the writer hails) and winds through southeastern Virginia. The forthcoming musical installments will continue in that vein where travel and movement are integral to the plotline.

Musically capturing the mood and feel of the drama that ensues over the course of the songs had to be a challenge in itself. Forester, lead guitarist for Navin Ave. offered his view of how the music supports the atmosphere of the narrative. noticeable when the singer-songwriter describes the developmental stages and how each band member added their own flavor to the music.

“I don’t dictate to others what their parts should be; everyone can hear their own parts… and I trust them. Everyone brought things to the music” she gushes when describing her bandmates—including Jeff Brawer on bass and Adam Revak on drums (who took over after Rodney Smith, the group’s original drummer who plays on the album, moved away from the area). “And I’m so grateful for them” she added.

Gratitude was also expressed by the couple when describing the guidance and assistance they received from another local musician, Shawn Kyle, who recorded and mixed Book 1- A Little Warming. “He made us sound good!” Krispinsky laughed. “He’s so patient and meticulous; he suggested things we would have never thought of” she added. “He never got flustered. He was upbeat and friendly, and he sat all day with us,” she stated while describing the recording process.

When asked if the idea was always to create a three-part series of recordings, both Krispinsky and Forrester quickly replied. “No! It was originally going to be three EPs with five songs on each of them. Now it’s become three albums with 30 songs” Krispinsky stated before Forrester added jokingly “…which is perfect for today’s attention span!”

Not surprisingly, as Krispinsky thinks of herself more as a writer than a musician, the literary aspect of the album’s concept isn’t being overlooked. The band intends to create music videos for each of the 10 songs on Book 1- A Little Warming that contain accompanying song lyrics as they are integral to the overall storyline. Additionally, a limited edition, uniquely packaged version of the album will be available, too. A small run of physical CDs housed inside a clamshell DVD case and including two printed booklets will be unveiled and sold at the band’s album release show which will occur on the Feb. 19 release date.

Drawing from a variety of influences, the creation of this ambitious project didn’t fully dwell on dark, morose subject matter. Recalling the band’s stab at emulating pop glam hair metal band Poison in an installment of the annual local fundraiser concert Fangsgiving, both Krispinsky and Forrester spoke of the Talk Dirty to Me band in the fondest terms and admitted that, sometimes, those ‘80s power ballad guitar solos find ways of creeping into their consciousness when creating music.

Don’t expect any hair metal covers on any of Navin Ave.’s trilogy of albums but rest assured that the originality and creativity that’s being invested and poured into the project guarantee end results unlike anything the local music scene has seen or heard before.

THU FEBRUARY 17–WED FEBRUARY 23

By Joshua Bradley C CL Recommends

THU 17

Murphy’s Law w/PissTest/The Scurvy/ Right on Time/PigPen To New York hardcore punk four-piece Murphy’s Law, a consistent lineup doesn’t matter. Lead vocalist Jimmy Gestapo is the only remaining original member of the band, which turns 40 this year. A new album has been in the works since at least a decade ago, and was set to be released in 2014, but as of right now, nothing new has materialized on the band’s part since 2001. In the meantime, the group behind “California Pipeline” will return to Tampa’s Brass Mug—just down the street from Skipper’s Smokehouse—this Thursday. Joining it are Gainesville punk-rock group Piss Test, the pirate punks of The Scurvy, as well as Right on Time, and Pig Pen. (Brass Mug, Tampa) beloved New World Brewery has held a celebration of rockabilly that features bands and artists that specialize in the genre, as well as fake bands paying tribute to pioneers of rockabilly such as Sister Rosetta Tharpe and Joe Clay. This year, Rockabilly Battle Royale is lucky enough to have scored Deke Dickerson, a modern rockabilly hero who established his bands upon moving from his home state of Missouri to California in his 20s. Recently, the 53-year-old even did the soundtrack to the Johnny Knoxville comedy, “Action Point,” which is the only good thing about that film. Joining Dickerson at the royale will be Boston’s own Jittery Jack & Miss Amy, and Bloodshot Jack from Montreal. (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa)

FRI 18

C Black Coffee Grammy-nominated DJ, producer, and songwriter Black Coffee brings his self-described “Afropolitan house” beats to the Warehouse District. The South African music mogul has an expansive list of credits including collaborations with Drake, Sabrina Claudio, Usher, and David Guetta. A staple in the global house scene since 2005, he continues to cement his place in the industry with every accolade he receives. (The Factory, St. Petersburg)—Brandalynn Nuñez Cepeda

C Joe Bonamassa One of Clearwater’s most regular performers returns for his annual performance–or in this case, performances. Guitar hero Joe Bonamassa, who had already made a name for himself when he reached his teens, has a new record out, entitled Time Clocks. Ahead of a Europe tour this year, he’s heading out on a U.S. run, which includes a two-night stint at Clearwater’s Ruth Eckerd Hall this weekend. The last time the 44-year-old was here, it was with a power trio, and it appears that he’s finally back with his old, full band. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)

Jose Feliciano How about an encore for all that Christmas music you either indulged yourself in, or tried to avoid this past year? If that’s what you’re after, Puerto-Rican singersongwriter Jose Feliciano, who gave us “Feliz Navidad” is making what appears to be his Tampa Bay debut this weekend in Largo. Don’t cringe, though. Born blind, Feliciano taught himself to play the accordion, played guitar obsessively, and sung in public while living in New York–all before the age of 10. (Central Park Performing Arts Center, Largo)

C Rockabilly Battle Royale XII feat. Amy Griffin/Bloodshot Bill/Deke Dickerson/ Jittery Jack For almost a decade, Tampa’s

SPIKE MARBLE

Deke Dickerson

SAT 19

Flosstradamus Like Vincent Furnier with Alice Cooper, DJ Curt Cameruci decided to use Flosstradamus—his old duo—as a pseudonym upon its breakup. And yet, it’s been a minute since the Chicago-bred DJ has released a new single or EP. After an immensely successful “Re-Entry” tour, he’s bringing his equipment and all the beats you could want to The Ritz for its Sunset Saturdays series. It’s a tight, indoor venue on a Saturday night, so bring a mask. (The Ritz, Ybor City)

Mike Pinto w/Gabo Fayuca San Diego singer-songwriter Mike Pinto has been singing about California living for the last decade, earning spots on the iTunes singer-songwriter charts, and Billboard’s reggae charts along the way. His 5th album, Truthful Lies, even debuted at no. 2 on Billboard. Right now, none of the incredibly prolific American songwriters (Dylan, Simon, Springsteen) have upcoming shows in Tampa Bay, so The Attic at Rock Brothers Brewing is giving a perfect opportunity to see a perennially “up-and-coming” artist such as Mike in a small setting. Joining him will be a man of similar genres, Fayuca frontman Gabo Fayuca. (The Attic, Ybor City)

Mobius Loop w/Ascending Radius The biggest songs from U.K-based folk-rap trio Mobius Loop all have one thing in common: They all sound like the type of song you would hear over the credits of a “Lord of

the Rings” film. The trio and its borderlinemedieval, mainly folksy sound is incredibly vocal in spreading the word about veganism, how shitty fox hunting is, and according to its Facebook bio, “alchemical magic, in the name of Hemp Redemption and the infinite unknown.” If this is something you wish to become a part of, Mobius Loop is hitting the road in the U.S this year, and a stop at New World Brewery is Tampa Bay’s latest brush with being one with the world. Supporting the trio will be rock trio Ascending Radius. (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa)

C The Ricca Project Made up of half the members of Ft. Lauderdale’s Heavy Pets, Ricca Project may remind some of Little Feat, thanks to its jam-based, yet very consistent instrumentation. This weekend, the funky power-trio will be at the Dunedin Brewery for two free shows. On Saturday, it’s a hip-hop set, while Sunday night features all Ricca Project material on the setlist. Joe Bonamassa recently put the trio’s latest single “Midnight Rider” on his “Keeping The Blues Alive” playlist on Spotify, so since he’ll also be in town this weekend, perhaps he’ll pop into Dunedin for a “drink.” (Dunedin Brewery, Dunedin)

Vanessa Collier Dallas-born saxophonist Vanessa Collier has been selling out wineries, clubs, and smaller venues worldwide for almost the last decade and has shared stages with Joe Louis Walker and Buddy Guy. Recently nominated for the Blues Music Award for Contemporary Blues Female Artist, Collier brings widely praised saxophone excellency to Skipper’s this weekend for her own solo show. (Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa)

MON 21

C The Jacksons Betcha didn’t know that three of the Jackson 5 were still together. Upon reuniting after brother Michael’s death, Tito, Jackie, and Marlon Jackson have been more active in keeping the discopioneering group alive than ever. Wherever Jermaine is, he’s gonna miss out on a party, because the three Jacksons are gearing up for a U.S. tour, which makes a stop at Tampa’s Hard Rock Event Center. It’s a pretty bittersweet situation, considering the fact that Michael only made it to Tampa a few times—all of which were before he was Michael fuckin’ Jackson. There are still plenty of tickets available. I’ll be there, will you? (Hard Rock Event Center, Tampa)

TUE 22

C Pilot Jonezz w/Charles Irwin/Sally4/ They Hate Change Next month, Porchfest will see music lovers roaming St. Pete’s Roser Park neighborhood catching mostly acoustic acts outside, but here’s a chance to go inside one of the neighborhood’s beloved DIY venues for one hell of a bill. They Hate Change signed to Jagjaguwar last year after label heads at the indie stalwart grew fond of the rap duo’s love and utilization of Chicago footwork and out-of-the-box ambient samples. Charles Irwin might be the best indie-pop band on either side of the Bay, and Pilot Jonezz (RIYL Radiohead, Funkadelic) has been making lots of noise lately, too. The addition of Tampa Bay’s grilled cheese man Jake Yaakov is a nice draw for this one, but the crown jewel is a solo set from Charles Irwin guitarist Sally4 who just dropped a new EP of bedroom-pop that’s already one of the best releases of the new year. You’re going to have to DM @sallyfourr on Instagram for the address. (Roser House, St. Petersburg)—Ray Roa

S A T U R Vendors Vendors Wanted Wanted

DAY, MA R CH 19TH

DAILY HAPPY HOUR!11AM-6PM

$2.50 YUENGLING & BUD LIGHT DRAFTS

$3.50 WELL DRINKS / $4.50 CALL DRINKS & HOUSE WINE LIVE MUSIC

EVERY TUESDAY W/ Matt PlaistED 6-9PM

FRIDAY 2/18

LIVE MUSIC • 7-10PM JERIKO TURNPIKE

SATURDAY 2/19

LIVE MUSIC • 7-10PM MATT ZITWER

SUNDAYS

BLOODY MARYS, MIMOSAS OR SANGRIA

CHAD COCHRAN

Sarah Shook & the Disarmers

WED 23

C Nita Strauss w/Like Machines/Level The Planet/Kamenar If you’re still bummed that you missed Alice Cooper’s annual performance in Tampa Bay this month, you have a chance to catch the most prominent member of his current backing band. Hurricane Nita Strauss—the band’s shredder—recently broke the glass ceiling of being the first female artist to have a no. 1 hit on the Mediabase Active Rock Chart. You’ll get to hear it live when the 35-year-old and her band tear down Tampa’s Brass Mug on Tuesday. Supporting them will be Atlanta-based rock duo Like Machines, and local support from rock groups Level the Planet and Kamenar. (Brass Mug, Tampa) C Sarah Shook & The Disarmers w/Will Quinlan and the Holy Slow Train Sarah Shook may have had a conservative Christian upbringing, but even having to live through rules like only being allowed to listen to classical and worship music, they still live the life of a non-hateful country musician. Shook is days away from dropping the Pete Andersonproduced Nightroamer, the third album with the former’s band, The Disarmers. A few days after the album’s release party—which will feature support from Hank Williams’ great grandson—Sarah and the Disarmers will be at Crowbar, technically kicking off its 2022 tour. Opening the show is local favorite Will Quinlan and The Holy Slow Train. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

THANK YOU FOR VOTING US BEST FRIED CHICKEN 3 YEARS IN A ROW!

KingOfTheCoop.com

Familiarize yourself with the hilly roads and historic homes of one of St. Petersburg’s oldest neighborhoods at Roser Park’s Porchfest next month. This year’s installment—happening on Saturday, March 19—features an exclusive tour of homes in the morning, with a stacked lineup of local music in the afternoon. The entire Porchfest runs from 9 a.m.-6 p.m.

Tickets for this family-friendly event can be purchased online at the Historic Roser Park District’s website, or at the festival. If you’d like to attend the tour of homes, tickets are available for $15 online, or $20 when purchased at the event. There will be a variety of different homes available to tour, featuring architectural styles from Spanish Revival to Craftsman to Dutch Colonial. The musicians will perform on porches scattered throughout the neighborhood, equipped with low-key acoustic setups.

The lineup of local music ranges from genres like singer-songwriter to folk rock—including acts like The Cheaters, Hot Tonic, Greg Roy, Deb Hunseder, LCNV, Rebekah Pulley, Kristopher James and the Kerry Courtney band. Access to this stacked lineup of local talent is free. In addition to the historic home showcase and live music, there will also be St. Pete-based arts and crafts vendors and food trucks.

The 270-acre Roser Park neighborhood runs from Dr. MLK Street S to 4 Street S just south of downtown St. Petersburg— but the main hub of action for next month’s Porchfest is the intersection of Roser Park Drive. S and Prospect Court. S. There’s plentiful street parking throughout Roser Park’s red brick streets, as well as a free Bayfront Health parking garage located just north of Porchfest.

Visit the Historic Roser Park Neighborhood Facebook at @roserparkneighborhoodcommunity organization for the day-of music schedule as Porchfest nears closer. Read more of Josh Bradley’s weekly new, canceled, postponed and rescheduled concert roundup below.—Kyla Fields

Liquid Pennies w/The Drain Outs/Witch Hiatus/Dream Thing Saturday, Feb. 19. 8 p.m. Free. The Hub, Tampa George Pennington and Friends Friday, Feb. 25. 8 p.m. $10. Crowbar, Ybor City Sarah Borges Saturday, March 5. 8 p.m. $20-$25. Skipper’s Smokehouse, Tampa Warped Winter 3 Tampa feat. Viewers Like You/Felicity/Deserted Will/ The Easy Button/Keep It A Secret/ Neverless/Malaya/Discord Theory Saturday, March 5. 5:30 p.m. $12. New World Music Hall, Tampa Dave Stryker Sunday, Mar. 6. 3 p.m. $10-$20, free for HCC students. HCC Ybor Mainstage Theatre, Tampa Chris Young w/Big & Rich Saturday, March 19. 6:30 p.m. Free with Valspar admission. Innisbrook Resort, Palm Harbor Luccio (opening for Cosmic Gate) Saturday, Mar. 19. 10 p.m. $15-$20. The Ritz, Ybor City Lettuce (rescheduled from Dec. 30) Thursday, March 24. 7 p.m. $25.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg Girl Named Tom Friday, April 1. 8 p.m. $25$39. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater AU5 + CHIME Friday, April 8. 10 p.m. Free guest list, $10 guaranteed entry. The Ritz, Ybor City Larry Fleet Saturday, April 9. 8 p.m. $25$45. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater Mike Love w/Cas Haley/Brett Wilson Friday, April 15. 6 p.m. $20. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg Eric Bellinger & Sammie Thursday, April 21. 7 p.m. $35-$150. Orpheum, Ybor City The Who Wednesday, April 27. 7:30 p.m. $37.25-$650. Amalie Arena, Tampa Tim Montana (opening for Koe Wetzel) Thursday, May 5. 8 p.m. $36. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg Dying Fetus w/Chelsea Grin/ Bodysnatcher/Frozen Soul/Undeath Friday, May 6. 5:30 p.m. $22.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg Sylvan Esso Sunday, May 15. 8 p.m. $32.50-$40. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg Cancellations/reschedules Arielle at Ruth Eckerd Hall’s Murray Theater, Feb. 20 Rescheduled to Oct. 8 Steven Wright at Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, March 6 Rescheduled to Nov. 10 Lil Tecca at The Ritz, March 27 Rescheduled to May 21 Matchbox Twenty at MIDFLORIDA Credit Union Amphitheatre, July 9 Rescheduled to July 8, 2023

Quickies

By Dan Savage

I’m a very sexual cis male in his 30s. Three years ago, I met this woman who just blew me away. She is eight years older, extremely beautiful, intelligent, and funny. I came onto her early on and she told me straight up that she was asexual. She likes kissing, cuddling, and solo masturbation, but that’s it. She says intercourse doesn’t do anything for her. To keep a relationship alive in the past, she would go through the motions, but she has no interest in doing that anymore, so I moved on. Since then, we got to know each other better and I have fallen in SAVAGE LOVE love with her. Last night we had dinner and I started thinking aloud how we might make a relationship work. I suggested that I could watch her masturbate, and maybe we could have an open relationship. She said it was out of the question. She admitted that when she first met me, she liked me, but now she loves me as a friend. She says there’s no chance that this could work, and we should keep things platonic. She doesn’t even want to kiss and cuddle me, as she fears I would get “worked up” and she would have to reject me. We got into an argument, and she got angry with me. I love her. I want to spend every moment with her. I sincerely believe we could make this work. How can I convince her?—Sexual

Man Into Loving Ecstasy

You already have your answer, SMILE, and that answer—her answer—is “no.” and I feel guilty about this. I’m also married, but my husband and I have an agreement about outside games. Maybe I just need you to tell me to stop.—Gay Urinal Is Lying To Spouse First, the obvious answer: Stop. Second, the obvious follow-up question: How’d that happen, GUILTS? Unless your best friend’s husband was wearing a ridiculously convincing urinal costume at a Halloween party and you were on mushrooms, it didn’t just happen. You did it. Even if he was in a convincing urinal costume and you ate all the mushrooms, you did it. You won’t be able to stop doing this if you can’t be honest about how you started. My friend started dating a girl eight years ago in college and broke up with her a year later. They have no relationship at all now. They don’t even converse. I have been in love with the girl in question since the first day I met her. I was going to ask her out years ago but before I could she was dating my friend. I recently asked her out and we are now dating but none of our friends from back then know. I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I vibe with her like no one else. Do you think it’s right to be with her? Or am I doing wrong to my friend?—The Bad Friend

I’m a horny divorced bisexual male. Can you help me find females for regular phone sex? I masturbate every night and enjoy it much more if I hear a sweet voice on the other end of the line. I live in North Carolina, and I am usually freshly showered, naked, and erect between 11 p.m. and midnight. I time my orgasms for precisely midnight. Please help and find me a female to have erotic discussions with!—Jerking About

Conversations Kept Sensuous

Sir, this is a Wendy’s. (Full disclosure: this isn’t a Wendy’s. This is a sex-advice column, JACKS, and sex-advice columnists are not match-makers. So, you’ll have to find and/or hire a phone sex provider on your own.)

I’m not having sex with my best friend’s husband, but we’re doing something my best friend would probably find objectionable: I’m letting his husband drink my piss. The first time it just kind of happened. We’re able to rationalize what we’re doing—my best friend isn’t into piss and I’m a “safe” person to do it with in that I’m not going to ask him for more—but it does involve putting my dick in the mouth of my best friend’s husband. I was the best man at their wedding,

Your friend broke up with this woman—the woman you want to spend the rest of your life with—seven years ago. He doesn’t own her, he doesn’t have eternal dibs, and if he can’t be happy for you, he’s not your friend. And if you’re feeling like a bad friend, maybe backing up and re-reading GUILTS’ letter will make you feel better.

My partner of 20 years and I recently agreed to open our relationship. There’s an acquaintance I’ve had a crush on since high school. I don’t know his situation—if he’s partnered, monogamous, whatever—but we’re in touch now and I have permission to approach him. But I’m nervous his answer will be no, and my fun fantasies—fantasies I’ve enjoyed about him all my adult life—will be tainted by embarrassment. The reward would be great, but the risk is huge. The possibility of a hookup with him IRL has been fueling my desire, which my partner has benefitted from, and I’d hate to lose that. What do you think?—Reliable Orgasms At Risk

Sexual fantasies are perfect, sexual realities are messy. So, even if your high school crush is available and interested, ROAR, there’s no way IRL sex with him is going to live up to your fantasies. But hitting on him (risky!) and/or getting with

JOE NEWTON

him (could still be great!) will make some space in your erotic imagination for other fantasies— fantasies you can enjoy during solo masturbation, fantasies that will continue to fuel your desire for and/or during sex with your husband.

During a recent Sack Lunch you spoke of a “zone of erotic autonomy” that we are all entitled to, even partnered people. I think that should be a term: ZOEA. It’s already a legal Scrabble word, as I’m sure you’re aware, and I think ZOEA would be as useful as DTMFA or GGG. Here’s an example of it being used in a sentence: Husband: “Do you think of me when you masturbate?” Wife: “Mind your own ZOEA.”—Neologism Now Needed

Zoea is already a word—and, therefore, fair game in Scrabble (“a free-swimming planktonic larval form of many decapod crustaceans and especially crabs [with] fringed antennae and mouthparts”)—but words can have more than one meaning, and I think ZOEA (pronounced “zo-EE-ah”) is a nice addition to my collection of initialisms.

I’m a late-to-come-out lesbian and so is my sister. We both live in the same moderate-sized city in the Pacific Northwest and are currently both on the dating market. The trouble I’m having is that the pool of eligible women in our city is small and the chances of us dating the same person seems likely, which makes me feel icky. I even matched with my sister on a dating app! That experience prompted me to take a break from dating while I sort out a better strategy. I’ve been dipping my toes in the water of more national queer communities and want to attend The Dinah in the fall to connect with other womxn from outside our area. I don’t want to hold back but getting too close to my sibling’s sex life just feels gross. Any guidance?—

Looking Everywhere Since Bursting Out

lesbian world is smaller still, and even if you restrict yourself to long-distance relationships, you’re probably gonna wind up dating someone your sister dated at some point. Hell, your chances of meeting a woman your sister dated at The Dinah are about as good as meeting a woman your sister dated on a dating app. Acknowledge the awkwardness, don’t be paralyzed by it, and block each other on dating apps.

I’m a straight 30-year-old guy. I live with my girlfriend of three years, we love and respect each other, and have very good sex. Unfortunately, sex is very satisfying for me until I have an orgasm. My orgasms start well, but they fade out toward the end, leaving me disappointed, because I consistently have better ones during masturbation. I have a plausible explanation: when I orgasm, I become very sensitive, and I cannot “spot-reduce” the stimulation very easily during intercourse. I’ve tried thrusting less, coming outside, breathing to stay relaxed, with and without condoms, etc., but the end result is always the same. I still enjoy my sex life but I’d like to be able to have my best orgasms while I’m with my girlfriend. Do you have any advice for me?—Climaxes Underwhelming My Senses

Stop masturbating for a bit and see if that doesn’t improve things during partnered sex. But if that doesn’t work, CUMS, you might wanna incorporate masturbation into your regular sex sessions with your girlfriend—not masturbation as foreplay, not mutual masturbation, but youdo-you-while-she-does-her and you watch each other. Having some of your “best” orgasms when you’re with her, even if you’re not touching her, may help you get to a point where you can have those orgasms when you’re inside her.

Send queries to questions@savagelove.net, follow @FakeDanSavage on Twitter, then get your podcasts, columns, books, merch, and more at savage.love.