San antonio current january 13, 2016

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6 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

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IN THIS

FIRST WORDS

1

On “You Can Carry Weapons in Texas Psychiatric Hospitals” // Caroline Gonzalez-Attwood: Texas is like one huge Psychiatric Hospital!

On “15 New Year’s Resolutions for San Antonio and Texas” // Miguel Maltos Gonzales: If we want to change the city we live in don’t just create awareness, don’t just pray, don’t just click like... Be the change you want through your actions with like minded people.

Together we will make San Antonio the city we want.

On “If Voting Ended Today, No Spurs Would Start the NBA All-Star Game” // Mari Jimenez: All star voting is fan driven. Spurs fans are smart enough to know that Pop could care less and doesn’t want any of them there anyway. It’s a great weekend to rest and spend time with their families!

On “Gov. Greg Abbott Supports Crosses on Sheriff’s Vehicles in Brewster County” // Loyd Hawkins: This is a violation of the 1st Amendment.

A governmental entity (the police) should not be in the business of promoting one religion over another.

Doesn’t surprise me that Abbott doesn’t realize this is unconstitutional since his understanding of the Constitution is on a 3rd grade level. [sic] • Send your thoughts, comments or kudos to letters@sacurrent.com

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ISSUE Issue 16_02 /// January 13-19, 2016

10

NEWS

Newsmonger Uber targets the military // There’s a new soccer jefe // Larry Coker leaves UTSA

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16

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CALENDAR

ARTS + CULTURE

Our top picks for the week

Court-toons An interview with the creator of Spurs Special Forces

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Fear and Loathing in San Antonio Donald Trump isn’t a radical outlier in his intolerance of Muslims

25

SCREENS

FOOD

Making a Myth Making a Murderer, fill in verdict here _____

Southtown Supermarket Sweeps Comparing your options

Full Contact Friday Night Tykes coach weighs in on chronic traumatic encephalopathy and youth football

Culinary Calendar 5 ways to get your drink/grub on this week

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MUSIC

Composing the Americas Symphony conductor LangLessing talks America, Gershwin, Ellington Queensrÿche Returns to SA An interview with Todd La Torre, the new vocalist for Queensrÿche Original Artyfacts from Across the Globe San Anto label Yippee Ki Yay steps out of the garage

Flavor File So many parties, so little time

NIGHTLIFE

Fave Five The new go-to cocktails Imbibing in Style 3 outfit ideas for this year’s San Antonio Cocktail Conference Libations & Learning From chocolate to jalapeño and beyond … you can stick it in a cocktail Party of Five Don’t miss these booze-fueled events

ETC.

Savage Love Jonesin’ Crossword Freewill Astrology This Modern World

Cocktails & Cigars How to pair your stogie with a great spirit

ON THE

COVER Celebrate five years’ worth of boozin’ in style with the San Antonio Cocktail Conference.

Illustration by Lauren Salguero

8 CURRENT • Janurary 13—19, 2016• sacurrent.com

Art direction by Rick Fisher and Sarah Flood-Baumann

sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 9

NEWS

YOUTUBE

•Darren Powell, pictured here as head coach of Elon University’s men’s soccer team, will lead the San Antonio USL team in its first season.

BEXAR-O-METER Checking the temperature of events in Bexar County and beyond

DREAMWEEK KICKS OFF

NEWSMONGER Uber Targets the Military // There’s a New Soccer Jefe // Larry Coker Leaves UTSA Uber Wants to Recruit You Uber drivers have been back on San Antonio streets since October. The ridehailing company claims it’s signed up more than 2,000 drivers in that time — but it wants more. A lot more.

During a press conference at Brooks City Base on Wednesday, January 6, Uber announced its new goal is to recruit 8,000 new drivers in 2016. Part of the push is to bring in more active military members and veterans — thus the Brooks City presser — through a program called UberMilitary.

UberMilitary targets members of the armed forces and their families. It claims its goal is to help them transition into civilian life. The idea is that the flexible hours that Uber driving affords makes it an ideal job for folks with irregular schedules.

Uber is trying to corral control of a San Antonio ride-hailing landscape that’s on wobbly terrain. Uber and its main competitor Lyft are still in the middle of pilot programs with the city, which will be re-evaluated later this year. And another competitor, Get Me, is now recruiting drivers and conducting orientations.

Get Me will be both a ride-hailing and 10 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

Equality and diversity festival runs through next week

MICHAEL MARKS/@MICHAELPMARKS

delivery service. It’s scheduled to officially launch in San Antonio on January 16.

San Antonio’s New Soccer Club Gets a Coach The San Antonio Scorpions are no more. They’ve been replaced by …

Well, we don’t have a name for them yet.

But they do have a coach! The club, owned

by Spurs Sports and Entertainment, will be coached by Darren Powell, who most recently coached youth academy teams for Orlando City, a Major League Soccer club.

Powell was also the head coach at Elon University in North Carolina.

Powell was introduced at a press conference on Thursday, January 7, when the Spurs-owned club was also officially welcomed into the United Soccer League. Participation in the third-tier USL, which is affiliated with the MLS, is part of the Spurs’ plan to bring big league soccer to San Antonio, now that the group owns a small share of Toyota Field along with the City of San Antonio and Bexar County. San Antonio is the 31st USL franchise.

Even though Powell doesn’t even have players to coach yet, he has his work cut out for him. The USL season starts in March.

Powell said it was a “privilege” and an “honor” to take the reins of the San Antonio club. He said he planned to field a fast-paced, aggressive team — once he actually has some players. His appointment, he said, is just one of the

first steps to the team’s eventual goal of playing in the MLS. “This will not happen overnight. Today we’re here to celebrate the first part of that journey, and that’s joining the USL,” Powell said. “This is a long-term project and we have to start with a strong foundation.”

Larry Coker Leaves UTSA The only head football coach the University of Texas at San Antonio has ever known stepped down last week.

Larry Coker, who won a national championship at the University of Miami in 2001, resigned as the Roadrunners’ head coach on Tuesday, January 5. Coker lead UTSA football for five seasons with an overall record of 26-32.

Coker helped build the program from the ground up. When he took the job, the team had no facilities and hadn’t recruited a single player. Coker’s highwater mark with the Roadrunners was the 2012 season when the team finished 8-4.

“UTSA has been a very special place to me and I will be forever grateful for the experience,” Coker said in a written statement. “The future of UTSA football is very bright and I look forward to watching the Roadrunners’ success in the future.”

It’s unclear who will succeed Coker, and his exit comes at an imperfect time for the Roadrunners. Most seats in the annual college coach carousel have been taken, leaving UTSA without a chance to sift through this season’s best candidates. mmarks@sacurrent.com

POPOVICH NAMED COACH OF THE MONTH For a record 16th time

BANDIDOS ARRESTED Leaders of alleged Waco combatants charged

OBAMA ISSUES EXECUTIVE ORDERS ON GUNS A little drop in a big bucket

RIVER WALK DRAINED So that’s where we left our sunglasses

BACK TO WORK BLUES If you even had time off

TAINTED CHIPOTLE Is no food safe?

T:10.18 in B:10.18 in

sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 11

S:10.18 in

© 2016 Goose Island Beer Co., Goose IPA®, India Pale Ale, Chicago, IL, Baldwinsville, NY, & Fort Collins, CO | Enjoy responsibly.

B:10.25 in T:10.25 in

S:10.25 in

NEWS

SARAH BROOKE LYONS

FEAR AND LOATHING IN SAN ANTONIO Intolerance grows as bashing Muslims goes mainstream in the race for the White House MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN

Just like nearly 20 million other Americans, Habiba Noor and her family watched the December 15 Republican debate in Las Vegas while sitting in their living room with the television’s familiar glow bouncing back at them.

Noor, a Muslim, was well aware that Donald Trump, who has suggested a temporary ban on allowing Muslims to enter the United States, would likely defend his xenophobic stance during the circus.

She let her 9-year-old daughter and twin 5-year-old boys stay up to watch it anyway. For her daughter, at least, it was time to understand who Trump was and what he represents.

“What was interesting is that Islam was predominant in that whole debate,” said Noor, a visiting professor at Trinity University. “She didn’t really understand ISIS and so, in her mind, given the Islamophobia that’s out there, and it’s so mainstream, when these guys talk about the Islamic State, you create a duality. And so, she’s reading that it is like we’re bad, so the Islamic State is good. And she asked us if we supported them.

“We told her we don’t support them and we don’t support him.”

Her daughter is only 9. Yet, it’s already necessary for Noor to have that talk with her.

“It’s kind of like the sex talk parents have with their kids,” Noor says, adding that she and her contacts on Facebook often discuss how to broach that conversation.

“You have to think about it, so that you do it in a way that’s comfortable for them and you.”

Noor knows a thing or two about talking to children about Islamophobia, too.

When al-Qaida militants hijacked planes and flew them into the World Trade Center on 9/11, killing nearly 3,000 people, Noor was living in New York City. After the attack, she began researching the immediate post9/11 environment and its effect on America’s Muslims, particularly those who were children at the time. Most of them are now in their early 20s.

After the attack, Noor said that Muslim children, particularly teens, were forced to become de facto spokespeople for Muslim communities.

12 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

•

Muslim men and boys during Friday night prayers at a local mosque last year.

“Since 9/11, it’s kind of a default state of participation. You have one foot in mainstream society and another in Muslim communities and you’re engaged in society,” she said.

Speaking about her teenaged niece and nephew, who live in Connecticut, Noor says they are often in positions where they have to defend Islam or stand up against Islamophobic statements made by friends, teachers or whomever.

When she taught in NYC schools after 9/11, sometimes students would call Muslim kids “terrorists” to harass them, or to just tease the child.

“It was totally common … it’s taken for granted how people joke with them,” Noor said.

However, the harassment can escalate.

Sarwat Husain, founding president of the San Antonio chapter of the Council on American-Islamic Relations, or CAIR, a national advocacy group, spends her days fielding calls from San Antonio’s Muslims when they or their children face harassment.

“Just in about all cases, each time the Republican debate comes out and the next day you see the reaction in the schools and what the kids are called,” Husain said.

“Somebody is calling them ‘terrorist’ or ‘go back to your terrorist country’ or ‘You’re here to kill me. Before you

kill me, I’ll kill you.’” Unfortunately, Husain said, school administration doesn’t always respond to these incidents appropriately. “The teachers say ‘Oh, kids are kids. You should not take it seriously,’” Husain said, likening the word “terrorist” to racial slurs used against black people.

“Your child is called a terrorist and you don’t take that seriously?”

Husain said she knows of five families, none of whom will speak to media for fear of retribution at the workplace or in their neighborhoods, that have pulled their children out of schools because of bullying in recent months.

Kim Ridgley, Northside Independent School District director of guidance and counseling, said she didn’t know of any particular instances of Islamophobic harassment of students in the district.

However, she said the district tries to be proactive against intolerance, through teaching cross-cultural effectiveness, which is mandated by the Texas Education Agency.

Still, Ridgley noted that whenever there is some big news story — say, the Republican debate — it does trickle down to children and that’s something parents should be aware of.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 15 ►

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2016 PARTIES WITH A PURPOSE February 4th | Animal Chat, Cocktails & Conversations at 20Nine Learn about some of the wildest animals in the Zoo as we compete for prizes & bragging rights.

April 7th | Zoolectric Party like animals when we light up the Zoo at night to celebrate our members at our annual membership drive.

Zoomers is the young professionals’ organization at the San Antonio Zoo dedicated to expanding conservation and awareness of the Zoo and its mission.

August 4th | Casino Safari Give back to your San Antonio Zoo where your bets really matter.

October 6th | Croctoberfest Beer, beer and more beer… and crocodiles!

SAZOO.ORG/SUPPORT/ZOOMERS | FACEBOOK/SAZOOMERS | SAZOOMERS@SAZOO.ORG 14 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com SAZ20556-Zoomers-SACurrent-10.25x10.18-4C.indd 1

1/11/16 5:07 PM

BRYAN RINDFUSS

M

NEWS

•Sarwat Husain, founding president of CAIR, says Islamophobia is worst than it was after 9/11.

◄ CONTINUED FROM PAGE 13

Aside from children in schools dealing with issues much larger than they are, Islamophobic sentiment continues to grow in the United States, and in San Antonio.

In November, 38-year-old Mariano Talavera marched into the Islamic Center of San Antonio with muddy boots that he refused to remove, dragging them over carpets in genderspecific prayer rooms in the mosque.

He shouted obscenities and cursed Islam while toting an American flag. He was arrested for trespassing.

While that’s just a random act, one of many over the years in San Antonio, the anti-Islam group ACT! for America has also taken root here. That group is founded by a woman named Brigette Gabriel who fancies herself an opponent of extremist Muslims.

The Southern Poverty Law Center — a nonprofit legal center specializing in civil rights — releases an annual list of hate groups functioning across the country. It’s the most credible, comprehensive list of hate groups, and any organizations that have “beliefs or practices that attack or malign an entire class of people” make the cut.

Stephen Piggott, a senior research analyst with SPLC who has been researching ACT! for America for the last year, says the national organization will be designated a hate group in about a month.

“The San Antonio chapter, specifically, is one of the most active of the local chapters across the country,” Piggott said.

Retired Lt. Col. Roy White, ACT! chapter coordinator in San Antonio, takes issue with the SPLC’s definition

of a hate group, which he says differs from the FBI’s definition, which requires a group to engage in violence (such as arson, murder or vandalism) to earn the label. He says ACT! is not a hate group.

“A true ‘hate group’ could not have relationships with over 75 active and past Senators/Congressmen as well has hundreds of state legislators who have helped pass laws to ensure American citizen’s rights are not being violated and purveyors of terrorism along with those groups who support it are punished under the law,” White says in an email.

He also takes issue with CAIR, saying the organization has tried to silence speakers at ACT! for America meetings.

“CAIR and SPLC operate in tandem to put labels on ACT for America in hopes of silencing our voice in telling the truth about Sharia law and the threat of radical Islamic ideology to Muslims and non-Muslims alike,” White said.

Clearly, ACT’s message resonates with many — there are more than 890 chapters of the organization across the country, and its San Antonio email list has more than 2,000 subscribers.

Each meeting regularly draws about 50 people and each year more than 1,200 San Antonio residents attend a chapter meeting, Piggott said.

For some, that’s a sign that Islamophobia is stronger than ever.

Husain, who has been fielding calls from San Antonio’s Muslim community about harassment since that fateful attack at the turn of the century, says she’s never seen it as bad as it is now.

“It’s worse than 9/11,” Husain said.

“We never had this after 9/11, one or two, here and there, but now it’s consistent.” mreagan@sacurrent.com

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sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 15

CALENDAR

GETTY IMAGES

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Chippendales SPECIAL EVENT

Get out your phone tree, girls, because the bare-chested, bowtie-wearing, shirt-cuff-clad men of Chippendales are kicking off their Break the Rules Tour at the Aztec. Aptly named for the elegant Chippendalestyle furniture in the original club, the male revue carved out a space where women could feel comfortable watching men drop trou. Today’s shows welcome everyone — including LGBTQ fans — to bump and grind. Whoever you are, just get ready: The Chippendales boys are known for bringing audience members onstage for a bit of special attention — no tipping required. $35, 7:30pm, Aztec Theatre, 104 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 812-4355, theaztectheatre.com.

— Murphi Cook

16 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

WED

13

The Producers THEATER

Hailed as one of the funniest musicals of all time, The Producers follows a washed-up Broadway producer and his accountant as they scheme to cash in on the biggest flop in showbiz history. Based on Mel Brooks’ 1968 directorial debut, it ditches some of the film’s darker laughs and settles for an optimistic tempo; nonetheless, critics were left in stitches, including one who summed it up as “a big Broadway book musical that is so ecstatically drunk on its powers to entertain that it leaves you delirious, too.” BMW of San Antonio brings the national tour to the Tobin. $36.50$89.50, 7:30pm, Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, tobincenter.org. — MC

THU

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‘Lorem Ipsum’ ART

The writers and graphic designers out there may groan at the sight of “Lorem Ipsum” in print, but in the case of New York-based Cordy Ryman, it’s not “dummy” text but the title of an exhibition that might have something to do with Roman philosopher Cicero.

Hailed as “a champion of unabashed visual pleasure,” Ryman works with such non-traditional materials as reclaimed wood, industrial paints, scrap metal, Velcro and Gorilla Glue. One of several shows celebrating Artpace’s 21st birthday, “Lorem Ipsum” opens in tandem with San Antonio artist Chris Sauter’s “Biography Construction Site (Cakes).” Free, 6-9pm, Artpace, 445 N. Main Ave., (210) 212-4900, artpace.org.

— Bryan Rindfuss

THU

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Spurs vs. Cavaliers SPORTS

Much like the Spurs, the Cleveland Cavaliers have been playing solid under-the-radar hoops, courtesy of the supernova Golden State Warriors.

Unlike SA, the Cavs are still forging an identity on defense, after welcoming back Kyrie Irving and Iman Shumpert from injury. When he’s not delivering babies, Shumpert, in particular, has helped beef up Cleveland’s defensive stats. The return of King James generates the type of electricity reserved for a prizefight, in what those in Bexar County will view as a Finals preview.

Watching Patty Mills square off against Matthew Dellavedova is an added bonus. $108-$2,052, 7pm, AT&T Center, One AT&T Center Pkwy., (210) 444-5000, attcenter.com. — M. Solis

CALENDAR

DONPHOTOGRAPHY.COM

THU

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‘Home on the Range’ ART

The Old West — with its cowboys, frontier life and sublime, untarnished wilderness — has long stimulated the imagination of American artists and writers. Following in this rich tradition, Denton-born, SA-based painter and performance artist Bryson Brooks, 40, has been painting bold, bright and surreal “Westerns” since his college days. Brooks’ latest exhibit “Home on the Range,” which opens Thursday with a beer and bourbon mixer, collects works from his efforts in this mode. The exhibit — full of whimsy, gold-leafed sunlight and daydreams of our bygone brethren — runs through January 30. Free, 6-8pm, AnArte Gallery, 7959 Broadway, Suite 404, (210) 826-5674, anartegallery09.com.

— James Courtney

SAT

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Tanlines MUSIC

Evolving somewhat organically as a production/remix collaboration between like-minded musicians Jesse Cohen and Eric Emm, New York outfit Tanlines crafts danceable nostalgia that’s simultaneously melancholic and playful. With the enduring single “Real Life” (one of Rolling Stone’s 50 Best Songs of 2012), the duo solidified a sound NPR member station KCRW likened to “sitting on a front stoop on an early summer night drinking a piña colada-flavored Brooklyn bodega ICEE.” For a briefer on the band’s quirky sensibility, check out their witty Twitter feed or Cohen’s refreshingly candid podcast, No Effects. $16, 8pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com. — Bryan Rindfuss

SAT

16

Legislate This!

BURLESQUE

Legislate This! Burlesque Productions is wishing a happy “Vajanuary” to all Texas ladies. The group, spearheaded by dancers/ activists Ginger Snaps (Austin), Tifa Tittlywinks (Houston) and Black Orchid (SA), originated three years ago in response to decreases in Planned Parenthood funding and misogyny in Texas politics. Saturday, you’re invited to experience the group’s latest, in the form of a huge burlesque show, in the intimate confines of The Uptown Studio.

Titillating in and of itself, the event gives folks an opportunity to contribute muchneeded funds to Planned Parenthood. $10, 8pm, The Uptown Studio, 700 Fredericksburg Road, facebook.com/ theuptownstudio. — JC

SUN

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Felix Da Housecat MUSIC

He may hate the word “electroclash,” but Chicago house hero Felix Stallings, Jr. (aka Felix Da Housecat) is among that genre’s most lauded survivors. Mentored by acidhouse innovator DJ Pierre, Stallings broke into the mainstream via 2001’s Kittenz and Thee Glitz. Anchored by the singles “Madame Hollywood” and “Silver Screen Shower Scene” (both featuring French vocalist Miss Kittin), the album led to major remix projects and a collab with Sean Diddy Combs. Sober after years of raising hell as the “Mezcalateer,” the Grammy nominee lands at Jack Rabbit for a DJ set on the heels of 2015’s Narrative of Thee Blast Illusion. $16-$25, 9:30pm, Jack Rabbit, 6322 San Pedro Ave., (210) 202-8989. — BR

sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 17

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2016

WaLK run rOLL 8am Saturday

January 23

Wheatley Heights Sports Complex 200 Noblewood Dr (near AT&T Center)

Race benefits 2,100 children with special needs in San Antonio

1-Mile accessible Course $15*

5K $25*

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www.kinetickidst x.org 18 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

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CALENDAR NIGHTLIFE

WED-TUE

TUE

DreamWeek, the “12-day summit [hosted in San Antonio and] developed to promote an exchange of ideas on universal issues facing our multicultural communities,” a true beacon of sanity and compassion, continues through next Tuesday.

Rich with events of all types, focused on issues of social justice and tolerance, DreamWeek gives you more opportunities to engage than we can possibly enumerate here. However, here are a few standouts we’re looking forward to attending. First, dig Wednesday’s discussion on Mass Incarceration in America (5:30-7pm, Blue Star Brewing Co., 1414 S. Alamo St.), an important and oft-overlooked topic. On Saturday, you can meditate on the joy of diversity through food at the Taste the Dream Gala (6-11pm, Institute of Texas Cultures, 801 E. César E. Chávez Blvd.). Meanwhile, Sunday, a tragically timely expert panel discussion will look at the Intersection of Immigration and Civil Rights (2pm, La Orilla del Rio Ballroom, 203 S. St Mary’s St.). Lastly, on Monday, pat your city on the back for hosting such a swell event at the DreamWeek Freedom Party (6:309:30pm, Southwest School of Art, 1201 Navarro St.). Prices, times and locations vary, visit dreamweek.org or call (210) 444-2315 for details. — James Courtney

Art

Art opening: “Headlines” Artist Jake

Pawelek unveils a series of large-scale paintings and sculptures of “chaotic and unconventional heads.” Free, 6-9pm Friday; Mercury Project, 538 Roosevelt Ave., (210) 478-9133.

Art opening: “Unity” Local artist Albert

Gonzalez celebrates DreamWeek with a spontaneous art experiment designed to “connect community on canvas through the creative vein that runs through us all.”

Free, 5:30-8pm Friday; Debra Benditz Art Studios, 237 W. Travis St., Suite 103.

“Art History Goes to the Theatre: Research Secrets of Great Designers”

The McNay presents paintings and sculptures by El Greco, Degas, Monet, Klimt, Mondrian, Ernst, O’Keeffe and others as forms of “cultural shorthand” with unexpected relevance in the realm of theater. $5-$10, 10am-4pm Wednesday, 10am-9pm Thursday, 10am-4pm Friday, 10am-5pm Saturday, noon-5pm Sunday, 10am-4pm Tuesday; McNay Art Museum, 6000 N. New Braunfels Ave., (210) 824-5368.

”Extraordinary” The latest offering from

Cinnabar, “Extraordinary” is a multiartist exhibit with an eye for repurposing everyday objects. Interpreted literally, the exhibit title is fitting: With familiar materials, participating artists created pieces that challenge conventions. Among the featured artists are Kevin Box (who creates metal sculptures reminiscent of folded paper), Ernesto Ibañez (who makes nails resemble animal fur), Javier

Vanegas (who crafts copies of controversial paintings from sex-service adverts) and Dörte Weber (who sees urban landscapes with a weaver’s eye). Free, noon-6pm Wednesday-Sunday; Cinnabar Art Gallery, 1420 S. Alamo St., # 147, (210) 557-6073.

Final week: International ArtistsIn-Residence Held over by popular

demand, the latest chapter of Artpace’s International Artists-In-Residence series comprises site-specific exhibitions by Cally Spooner (London), Marie Lorenz (New York) and Larry Bamburg (Marfa). Free, noon-5pm Wednesay, noon-9pm Thursday, noon-5pm Friday-Sunday; Artpace, 445 N. Main Ave., (210) 212-4900.

Winter Shows at Blue Star Winter at

Blue Star Contemporary Art brings three exciting new exhibitions, on view through February 7. For starters, “Turn Your Face Toward the Sun,” the Main Gallery’s exhibit of work by Texastransplants Charlie Morris and Liz Rodda, is a multidisciplinary affair that employs assemblage as a medium to juxtapose and re-contextualize found items, seemingly random images and crafted elements. In Gallery 4, take in Norwegian filmmaker Bodil Furu’s Landscapes by the Book. From multiple points of view, the video looks at how the landscapes and people in Fron, Norway are altered by development and notions of progress.

Meanwhile, in the Project Space, the interactive and deeply imaginative “Gift: An Exquisite Exhibition” draws inspiration from creativity scholar Lewis Hyde’s book The Gift: Creativity and the Artist in the

SARAH BROOKE LYONS

13-19

DreamWeek

19

San Antonio Feminist Film Festival

In its inaugural year, the San Antonio Feminist Film Festival (aka Scene & Heard) hopes to kick-start some serious conversations with the four films screening during its inconsecutive two-night event. On Tuesday, the double bill includes the 2015 documentary He Named Me Malala about young Pakistani activist and Nobel Peace Prize winner Malala Yousafzai, who was shot in the head by the Taliban for speaking out on education rights for women in her country. The film is followed by 2010’s Maria in Nobody’s Land, a doc that tells the story of three Salvadoran women making their way to the U.S. on the tops of trains. On Thursday (January 21), SAFFF screens the 2013 doc Alice Walker: Beauty in Truth on the first black woman to win the Pulitzer Prize in fiction (The Color Purple) and the 2014 “abortion comedy” Obvious Child starring comedian Jenny Slate. “We wanted to pay tribute to women who are making global change,” said La Juana Chambers, SAFFF committee member. “The idea is to commemorate women’s struggles and empower others.” $30 per night, $50 both nights, 6:30pm, Alamo Drafthouse Park North, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 677-8500, safeministfilmfestival.net. – Kiko Martínez

Modern World. Designed to grow and change over time, the exhibition opens with a single artwork by Lawrence Weiner, with subsequent installations on January 14 and 21. $3-$5, noon-8pm Thursday, noon-6pm Friday-Sunday; Blue Star Contemporary Art Museum, 116 Blue Star, (210) 227-6960.

Film

I Am Not My Skin The Martinez Street

Women’s Center hosts a free screening of Dark Girls (a documentary exploring deepseated biases and attitudes about skin color outside of and within black American culture) followed by a dialogue, reception, art exhibition and spokenword presentation by poet Chante Cepeda. $5 suggested donation, 2-4:30pm Saturday; Lockwood Park, 801 N. Olive St., (210) 534-6638.

Overcoming Homelessness In

conjunction with DreamWeek, Texas Public Radio partners with SAMMinistries to present the acclaimed films Inocente (an Oscar-winning short documentary about a homeless young San Diego artist’s fierce determination to never surrender to the bleakness of her surroundings) and Time Out Of Mind (starring Richard Gere as a man struggling to find food and a place to sleep in New York City) as well as a panel discussion on overcoming homelessness. $10-$15 suggested donation (benefiting SAMMinistries), 7pm Wednesday; Santikos Bijou, 4522 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 734-4552.

Theater

Martin, Malcolm and Me The San

Antonio Martin Luther King, Jr. Commission welcomes writer/director JD Lawrence for a presentation of his play surrounding a chance meeting between Malcolm X, Martin Luther King, Jr. and a young black man whose brother is wrongfully killed by police. $29-$39, 7pm Wednesday; Carver Community Cultural Center, Jo Long Theatre, 226 N. Hackberry St., (210) 207-7211.

Movement: Reprise The Magik Theatre

observes DreamWeek by assembling a multicultural group of artists for an original performance of music, dance and poetry inspired by the struggles and triumphs of the Civil Rights Movement. $5 suggested donation, 7pm Thursday; Magik Theatre, 420 S. Alamo St., (210) 227-2751.

Trash Tree The wonderfully wacky Overtime

recently announced a 2016 season packed with such original oddities as Eric Appleton’s Ghostbears! and Jens Rushing’s Locolobo: A Punk Prometheus Psycho Wolf Musical Comedy. But before any of those theatrical gems get unleashed onstage, SA’s “theater for the people” plays host to a short-run show created by choreographer, actor and Artist Foundation grant winner Stephan Gaeth. While its name might conjure cottonwoods, hackberries and other so-called “trash trees,” the movement-based improv piece concerns a tree built from trash following an apocalyptic event. $10$14, 8pm Friday-Saturday; The Overtime Theater, 1203 Camden St., (210) 557-7562.

sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 19

20 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

CALENDAR NIGHTLIFE

Comedy

Aries Spears Chicago native and MADtv

veteran Aries Spears (The Klumps, Jerry Maguire, The Underground) brings his celebrity impersonations (James Brown, Al Pacino, Eddie Murphy) and “ferociously aggressive” style of stand-up to Laugh Out Loud. $22.50, 8pm Thursday, 8pm & 10:15pm Friday-Saturday, 7pm Sunday; Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 541-8805.

Eric O’Shea Former altar boy and “shy

nerd” Eric O’Shea is possibly best known for his viral YouTube video “Songs for Commercials,” which he performed with Betty White at the Creative Emmy Awards. $17, 8pm Wednesday-Thursday, 7:30pm & 9:45pm Friday-Saturday, 7:30pm Sunday; Rivercenter Comedy Club, 849 E. Commerce St., (210) 229-1420.

(Ed’s Smok-N-Q), Jeff Balfour (Southerleigh Fine Food & Brewery), Elizabeth Johnson (Pharm Table), Garlan McPherson (Mrs. Kitchen) and Brian West (Smoke the Restaurant). $100, 6-11pm Saturday; Institute of Texan Cultures, 801 E. César Chávez Blvd., (210) 248-9178.

imagined artist still faces the anxiety of a large blank canvas. Free, 6:30-7:30pm Thursday; McNay Art Museum, 6000 N. New Braunfels Ave., (210) 824-5368.

Pass the Mic: The Future of Hip-Hop Café

College facilitates a DreamWeek panel exploring hip-hop as an inherently political genre that pushes the envelope, provokes listeners and sparks discussion. Free but RSVP required (visit dreamweek.org for details), 10am-1pm Friday; Café College, 131 El Paso St., (210) 207-4528.

Talks Plus

Full Stop The McNay welcomes artist Tom

Burckhardt for a discussion about his fullscale replica of an artist’s studio made entirely of cardboard, black paint and hot glue. Surrounded by historical art references — Jasper Johns’ coffee can of brushes, Willem de Kooning’s record player and Jackson Pollock’s shoes — the

Realizing The Dream Of A World Class City: SA2020 Panelists Andres

Andujar (Hemisfair), Molly Cox (SA 2020), Sandy Morander (YMCA), Sho Nakpodia

(DreamWeek SA) and Ron Nirenberg (City Council) unite for a discussion about community leaders and organizations creating thoughtful and deliberate action to reach a collective vision. Free, cash bar and mingling at 4:45pm, panel at 5:50pm, Q&A at 6:35pm Wednesday; Pearl Stable, 307 Pearl Pkwy., (210) 704-1025.

Dance

Algoritmos Multidisciplinary choreographic

project Arte y Pasión stages an original production fusing flamenco with modern movement and fine art. $25-$55, 7pm Saturday, 3pm Sunday; Jump-Start Performing Arts Center, 710 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 227-5867.

Special Events

Awesome SA Pitch Party Three of nine

finalists will each win $1,0000 to realize projects designed to “make San Antonio more awesome.” $5 donation, 6:30-10pm Thursday; Brick, 108 Blue Star, (210) 262-8653.

Cocktails with the Community The

Playhouse hosts a DreamWeek mixer and panel discussion about the future of art in San Antonio. Free, 6-7pm Wednesday; The Playhouse, 800 W. Ashby Pl., (210) 733-7258.

Martin Luther King, Jr. March The MLK

Commission encourages individuals as well as civic, social and religious organizations to join one of the largest MLK Day marches in the nation. The 2.5-mile march steps off at 10am from Martin Luther King, Jr. Academy (3501 Martin Luther King Drive) and culminates at Pittman-Sullivan Park (1101 Iowa St.). Free, 10am Monday; 3501 Martin Luther King Drive, (210) 207-2066.

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SAGE “Taste the Dream” Gala In

conjunction with DreamWeek, SAGE (San Antonio for Growth on the Eastside) hosts a fundraising gala with live music, dancing, a raffle, an open-bar cocktail reception and tastings prepared by chefs David Arciniega (Amaya’s Cocina), Chris Ashford

sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 21

ARTS + CULTURE

MATT HILL

COURT-TOONS

An interview with the creator of Spurs Special Forces MICHAEL MARKS/@MICHAELPMARKS

®

22 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

Who would’ve guessed that a web cartoon about some of the most beloved figures in San Antonio was the concoction of a Los Angeles-based economics professor?

But Spurs Special Forces, the fictional animated YouTube series that casts the Spurs as “a crack international commando unit,” is just that. It’s created by Matt Hill, an economics professor at the University of California, Los Angeles and NBA nut who moonlights as a comedy writer.

The backstory is that the Spurs, (actually an acronym for Secret People Undercover as Rad Sportsplayers, who knew?) were forced into “hiding in plain sight” after being framed for a crime. Now they’re secret mercenaries for justice, who win NBA titles on the side to keep up the façade.

Hill’s made three episodes since January 2015, which have collectively earned over 600,000 views. In the first

installment (“DNP-Kidnapped”), the team must rescue Manu Ginobili from an obsessed fan who sends them a bald spot as proof of his captivity.

The most recent episode — in which Tim Duncan, Tony Parker and Ginobili must save Coach Pop from New York Knicks President Phil Jackson and salvage the team’s pitch to then-free agent LaMarcus Aldridge — was posted to YouTube in mid-December 2015.

The San Antonio Current asked how a fair-weather Lakers fan found himself animating the Spurs, what he knows about San Antonio and how he makes the cartoons. This interview has been edited for clarity and length.

•

Matt Hill

How did you come up with the idea?

People think that ideas just come, but it’s just work. You sit down and you just think. I was at a coffee shop trying to come up with ideas and [Spurs Special Forces] was one of them. I’m a huge NBA fan,

MATT HILL

•

Those five titles? They’re just a front. Taking down evil-doers like Phil Jackson and saving San Antonio is the Spurs’ real job.

make other web series on the weekends. Really, I put it together whenever I have free time. An hour here, a few hours there. The animation is a tedious process.

When can we expect the next one?

It takes me so much longer to make them than I think. I think I’ll be able to finish this one in a month or something, and then it takes me forever because I have to make money, I have a job. I don’t want people to get too excited that the fourth one will come out anytime soon. But it’s going to be really long, much longer and it will feature a Spur from the past.

I’m an observer of the NBA. I love the Spurs. I love Pop so much. [I thought] it would be fun to see them in a different context.

What process do you use to make them?

I use Photoshop to make the characters and then After Effects to animate it. I had no background in animation before I did the first one. But I liked the idea so much that I taught myself how to animate. That’s why the animation is so bad — I never went to school for it, it’s not my strong suit. I learned just enough to be able to do it.

Have you become more of a Spurs fan since making the videos?

Oh yeah, absolutely. When I did the first [video] I expected maybe 1,000 people to see it. When a lot of people saw it and liked it, I felt like I was grateful to the Spurs. I was dying that last playoff series when they lost to the Clippers, because I hate the Clippers so much. When [the Spurs] went down in Game 7, it was a great game, so much fun to watch, but it killed me.

They’re the best. You’ve got to respect the organization even if you’re not a fan.

Did you end up researching San Antonio for the videos?

I did. I’m familiar with everything basketball-related from following the league, but I’ve never been there so there’s things I don’t know. I had to Google what’s big in San Antonio, what’s going on there.

What did you find out?

It was the River Walk, the Alamo and SeaWorld. I haven’t used any of those [for the videos], but the fourth one I’ve written and animated a little bit, it does feature the River Walk and one of those other things. I’d love to go to San Antonio, go to a Spurs game.

How long do they take to make?

It’s really hard to measure because it’s not like I sit down and make it all at once. I have a full-time job and sometimes I’ll have another job on top of that job. I

What’s the reaction been like?

I’m always surprised by how positive everyone is. The Internet is sometimes a negative place. Honestly, there’s been not a single bad thing said about the second and third one. I’m always surprised there’s no hate.

Do you know if anyone with the Spurs has seen this?

I have no idea if they’ve seen it. I haven’t heard from anyone associated with the Spurs. I hope they see it at some point. Maybe they have seen it and just hate it.

You’re a fan of the NBA — what do you think of the Spurs this year?

The thing with them is they’re kind of flying under the radar. They look incredible. Their point differential is close to the [Golden State] Warriors. I don’t think they’re as good as the Warriors, but they’re right there.

I think they have a psychological edge on the Warriors.

I hope we get to see them play. I think the Spurs are clearly the second-best team in the league, and maybe they’re even 1B. mmarks@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 23

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SCREENS

NETFLIX

MAKING A

MYTH Making a Murderer and the new breed of serial politicking TRAVIS BUFFKIN | @DTBUFFKIN

•Steven Avery, murderer or martyr?

As an increasingly voyeuristic public, we cotton to movies or serials that appeal to our sense of outrage at an injustice; we get all worked up over the despicable behavior of the exaggerated antagonists and then rejoice as our wronged hero rises to victory.

This is one of the predicaments of the modern film.

Our sense of inequity is incited and we believe we have to, and do, set our egos aside, we overcome our lust for vengeance to defeat the enemy on a higher philosophical plane. We even grow uncomfortable with the ongoing pain of the antagonist, becoming more righteous than they, overcoming their lack of morality, pitying their shamefulness. This is the predominant narrative that drives our foreign policy and dictates much of our shared and propagated exceptionalism, as well as our cinema.

Interestingly, there is a growing number of films and series that are for the next-level observer – someone who deems themselves above this plateau of surfacelevel reactionary. A more frustrating framework wherein the guilty or innocent party never gets their deserved comeuppance. Think Serial, The Jinx or Netflix’s Making a Murderer.

Making a Murderer follows the trial of Steven Avery, a Wisconsin man who has just been released from prison after serving 18 years for a crime from which newly evaluated DNA evidence exonerates him. He returns

to the modest existence he knew: working in the family salvage yard located on a plot of land that is home to several family members, a group that much of Manitowoc County’s population holds as inbred, immoral and lesserthan on all levels.

Avery begins a case against the county, suing them for $36 million for his wrongful imprisonment. This is the reason, according to directors Laura Ricciardi and Moira Demos, for the resulting attempt to incriminate Avery, the man who incriminated Manitowoc's entire justice system.

The first episode of the 10-part series documents the climate surrounding the original trial, the belief that due to Avery’s spotty upbringing and “one-limb” family tree he his inherently guilty. However, things get really interesting when upon his release from prison he finds himself on trial once more for the rape, mutilation and murder of a local woman, Teresa Halbach, the crime that will serve as Avery’s just desserts for making the county eat crow.

Episodes 2 through 10 take us on a ride of potentially planted evidence, shoddy police work, contradictory confessions and renunciations by Avery’s developmentally disabled nephew, Brendan Dassey. In several interviews with investigators Dassey states that he was present and took part in the crimes against Halbach under the tutelage of Avery. He goes on to tell his mother in recorded phone calls from prison that the investigators “got into [his] head”

and that he and Avery are innocent.

There’s far too much speculation, evidence and editing for me to be convinced one way or the other whether Avery is innocent or guilty. As the series increases in popularity there is growing interest in Avery and Dassey’s cases, to the point that a change.org petition has gathered over 300,000 signatures calling for Avery’s release.

As of Wednesday, January 6, a 2009 filing from Avery has surfaced stating that he suspects his two brothers of killing Halbach. They, like Avery, have extensive rap sheets that include threatening a relative with a firearm, attempted rape, sexual assault and cruelty to animals. If you want to do the research, there is a burgeoning source of info available online for or against Avery’s innocence.

However, all of this speculation further enforces our sense of objectivity and implements our beliefs that we can ascertain the innocence or guilt of an individual via media conjecture, that we ourselves are above prejudice, whether against a hillbilly in rural Wisconsin or a system that often locks up innocent citizens. That is the evolving essence of modern American media — entertainment in which to frame our ideologies, to shield us from the underlying truth. The truth that we, often, don’t know jack shit. dtbuffkin@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 25

28 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

FOOD

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS

SOUTHTOWN SUPERMARKET SWEEPS How shopping differs in the area’s grocery stores JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Last December, Southtown welcomed not one but two grocery stores to the area. The first was the long-awaited and ballyhooed H-E-B Flores Market, while the second was The Urban Farm Stand, a locally sourced and curated nook off Presa St. Because I don’t live near Southtown and I’m literally two blocks from my closest H-E-B, and maybe five minutes away from Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s at The Quarry Market, I don’t understand the plight Downtown dwellers face when it comes to limited grocery options. The openings of these two stores meant it was time to take a gander at how to shop in the area, whether it’s feasible to stay at one store and what the hardships are — even now. It should also be noted I shop as a single millennial who eats out a lot.

Here are my results.

• Blue Star Provisions

1414 S. Alamo St., Suite 103, (210) 858-0329, bluestarprovisions.com Hours: 7 a.m.-9 p.m. Mon-Sat, 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Sun Space: Blue Star Provisions opened in August in front of Halcyon.

Selection: The shop is neat and clean and carries necessary items, including dog and cat food (a bag of Pure Balance will set you back $10). I found most items on my list: pasta, fresh tomatoes, jarred tomato sauce, basil, paper towels and pet food.

Parking: Tricky. It’s shared with the rest of the Blue Star Art Complex.

Prices: If I were to compare this to its larger counterparts, I would liken Blue Star Provisions to a wee Whole Foods. Everything is just slightly more expensive, but organic, natural and local when available, so that’s a plus. I spent $25.85 (but did score a pineapple and greens smoothie with extra avocado).

Extras: Carts, growler fills, smoothies, ready-to-go food, large frozen food section

•Let’s go

shopping!

• H-E-B Flores Market

516 S. Flores St.,

(210) 444-1879, heb.com Hours: 7-9 p.m. daily Space: It’s tight in there, man. The narrow aisles aren’t meant for dilly-dallying in the least. Better find that can of corn STAT. Selection: Think of your local H-E-B and then take 80 percent of brand varieties out and you’re left with essentially one or so of everything — from tomatoes to deodorant. The wine and booze section is massive, which is great. I was able to procure all items on my list and a few extras for another recipe. Bonus: Flores Market also carries Naked Coconut Eats meals for busy folks on the go.

Parking: Sweet little parking lot, but I also stopped by on a chill Sunday evening so it could differ from, say, a busy pre-Super Bowl afternoon.

Prices: Comparable to other H-E-Bs; I spent $27.03 Extras: Gas station, carts, ready-to-eat meals, microwave station

• Urban Farm Stand

1423 S. Presa St., (210) 702-0898, theurbanfarmstand.com Hours: 9 a.m.-7 p.m. Mon-Sat, noon-4 p.m. Sun Space: It’s a cozy little shop, filled with wafting aromatics from the available herbs.

Selection: Because the Urban Farm Stand is essentially considered an indoor farmers market, expect to find similar selections as you would at a market. I was able to find tomatoes, pasta (made of spinach, basil and garlic no less) and red sauce. I didn’t spot any towels, or pet food, but did manage to leave with a $2 basil plant and grated garlic parmesan.

Parking: There are a handful of spaces right outside the door.

Prices: Comparable to the H-E-B’s produce section, but slightly pricier on the local pasta. It was Go Texan after all. I spent $25.85.

Extras: I left with a plant, and my lovely cashier made sure my tomatoes were good to go. There’s also a reading nook with cookbooks. flavor@sacurrent.com

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sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 29

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30 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

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FOOD

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CULINARY CALENDAR

5 Ways to Get Your Drink/Grub on This Week

• F U E L • R E S TAU R A N T • P R O D U C E • M E AT M A R K E T •

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Wednesday, January 13 Salud! Culinary Night: The Witte continues its monthly dinner program with the chefs from O’liva. Join chef Josef Davila and chef/owner Chuck Hernandez for a night of locally made breads and foods, including a kale and spinach salad with shaved beets, pears, Danish blue cheese and pecans; braised pork shank with smoky polenta and sautéed kale; and peach and blueberry cobbler topped with house-made granola. $45 for members, $50 for nonmembers, 6:30-8:30pm, 3801 Broadway, (210) 357-1910, wittemuseum.org.

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Girls’ Pint Out: Cullum’s Attagirl is ditching dudes for the evening as the women of San Antonio’s Girls’ Pint Out chapter meet for a1/13 few beers, chat –about styles – Wine Tasting Spainbeer vs. Italy, Red vs. and build new connections. Free admission, 6:30-9pm, 726usE.asMistletoe Ave., (210) Red. Join we explore these 2 great wine producers and decide who makes it 437-4263, facebook.com/sanantoniogpo.

1/13 – Wine Tasting - Spain Vs. Italy Red vs. Red.

Join us as we explore these 2 great wine producers and decide who makes it best.

best.

Friday, January 15 1/20 – Wine Pairing – Join us as we travel to Branchline Brewing Anniversary: The guys at Brewing kick off theBranchline Basque region and savor some great their third year in business with two days’ worth offood releases and fun.

Friday, the paired and great wine.On Enjoy 6 wines with (4-9pm) a four course dinner. brewery will release their sour and barrel-aged brews followed by a cask session on Saturday morning (11am-4pm) and finally a seasonal and rare tapping. $15 presale, $20 at the door if the event isn’t sold out, and $40 for an all-session pass, hours vary, 3633 Metro Pkwy., (210) 403-2097, branchlinebrewing.com.

Saturday, January 16 Chili Cook-off: Chili could come off as boring, sure, but at its core, a warm bowl of Texas red can make everything right. Find out which mobile kitchen can make the best pot of the meaty stuff during the third annual food truck chili cook-off at The Point Park & Eats. Competitors include Pork U, Slider Provider, Caliente Grill, KR’s Geaux-2 Catering and Benjies Munch. Pho U Vietnamese Cuisine and North Shore Shave Ice will also be serving up some goodies. Pair that chili with $2 Lone Star all day. Free admission, noon, 24188 Boerne Stage Road, facebook.com/thepointpark.

Tuesday, January 19 Mexican Street Food: Make cooking delicious tlacoyos part of your food goals this year. The Central Market cooking staff will lead this hands-on course on making chile de arbol and peanut salsa, tlacoyos de frijol and requeson, enchiladas verdes and bistek en salsa de chile pasilla. $60, 6:30-9pm, 4821 Broadway, (210) 3688600, centralmarket.com.

1/19 – 1/23 - San Antonio Restaurant Week – Come to

214 Broadway NectarSa.com @NectarSAT Web: NectarSA.com

@Nectarsat

Nectar for a great dinner and a great cause. Nectar is proud to be a part of SARW this January. We will be offering a delicious meal starting with a Champagne Spinach Salad, Course 2 will be Lobster Mac ‘N Cheese with Red Dragon cheese and topped with Crispy Serrano Ham and course 3 will be Chocolate Mousse with Lady Fingers.

Nectar Wine Bar and Ale House

Nectarwinebar

1/27 – Wine Pairing – Join us as we travel to the Basque region and savor some gre Enjoy 6 wines paired with a four-course dinner. The Basque region is where Spain a place where the food is made with love. They make everything farm to table like we a cheese course then have a hot seafood dish and then on to a braised beef main co delicious chocolate desert. It is $50 for the four courses and 6 glasses of wine. The diners, so hurry and make your reservation.

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226 W Bitters Rd #124 • (210) 545-3354 • saebthainoodlesa.com sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 31

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Rosella Adds Waffles, Grayze Opens, and Brand Party to Hit This Week JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

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Grayze (521 E. Grayson St., 210-4818281), which replaces Grayson Street Eatery, opened this Monday.

The restaurant, helmed

by James Moore (previously with Boiler House, Max’s Wine Dive and owner of TBA), held soft openings this past weekend, and already the space is night and day from its predecessor. Grayze • Don’t miss these waffles. features intimate lighting and a cozy dining room with a sprawling patio that will be a haunt come springtime. The menu created by chef Pedro Cuellar for the soft openings will likely get a few tweaks, but expect familiar items with fun touches like a cornmeal-crusted calamari with shishito chamoy and saffron aioli, and a blackened redfish po’boy.

Rosella Coffee Company (203 E. Jones Ave., #101, 210-277-8574) is beefing up its food offerings with an expanded breakfast lineup that includes an open-faced biscuit sandwich with seared smoked ham, American cheese, two fried eggs and chives, and “Lighter Than Air” waffles available Monday through Friday through 2 p.m. Hot sandwiches and new salads are also on the menu these days from 11 a.m. to close, including a Reuben, BLT&A (made with smashed avocado and house-made spicy roasted garlic aioli) and heirloom tomato salad with cherry heirlooms, burrata, mint, basil and sweet and spicy mustard. Bonus: Waffles are also making their way onto the dessert menu. Wafflegatos — waffles, ice cream and espresso syrup — are now available.

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If for some reason you don’t get your fill during the San Antonio Cocktail Conference, Mezcalería Mixtli (5313 McCullough Ave., 210-320-1600) is hosting a trio of after-parties this week starting with A Night in Chihuahua on Thursday at 9 p.m. featuring sotol tastings, followed by a night of smoke and fire on Friday at 10 p.m. with Montelobos Mezcal and Ancho Reyes brand ambassadors in the mix.

Saturday’s A Night in Oaxaca caps off the celebrations with Wahaka Mezca and Ulises Torrentera of Situ Mezcaleria in Oaxaca. Folc (226 E. Olmos Drive, 210822-0100) will also host a post-opening night soiree on Thursday with a Treaty Oak takeover (complete with ramen bar for purchase) from 9 p.m. to midnight.

Conference ticketholders can join the festivities from Downtown by hopping on the provided shuttle to and from the Majestic Theatre.

If you’re jonesing for great bread, sandwiches, savory soups and best of all, birthday cake, check out The Bread Box (555 W. Bitters Road, Suite 115, 210-2778612), which opened last November inside the Artisans Alley. It’s quaint and a must for all sandwich lovers. flavor@sacurrent.com

9818 W. Interstate 10 • San Antonio, TX 78230 • (Corner of Wurzbach & IH-10) • 210-562-3075 32 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

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NIGHTLIFE

LINDA ROMERO

FAVE FIVE 5 cocktails we weren’t drinking (for the most part) before the SACC RON BECHTOL

San Antonio is relatively new to the cocktail revolution — but not as late to the party as we often are thanks in no small part to the intelligent imbibers and their alumni at Bohanan’s, their late, lamented cocktail consultant, Sasha Petraske, and the Cocktail Conference they stirred up together. Here, in no particular order, are five cocktails/methods that most of us hadn’t heard of/tasted/even considered possible in those dark B.C. (Before Cocktail) days.

THE RE-TUNED TIKI: Sure the Tiki drink, all orchidbedecked and tiny umbrella-topped, has been around since the days of Don the Beachcomber (actually born a Texan, by the way), so it’s not that we didn’t know some old standards. But we weren’t both revering and reinventing them until true Tikiheads, such as Bohanan’s alumnus Jeret Peña, burst on the tropical drink scene with Tiki Tuesdays at the Brooklynite. (The otherwise somber ‘tenders at Bohanan’s have been known to shed their suits for Hawaiian shirts on occasion as well.) More than just an excuse for florid fabrics and kitschy mugs, these drinks thoughtfully reworked what had become a clichéd category with house-made orgeat, sundry infusions, spice tinctures … and booze beyond Sailor Jerry’s. Try the Desert Island Mixtape and welcome to the new C.E. (Cocktail Era).

BARREL-AGED COCKTAILS: It’s not that we were already intimate with the New Orleans-inspired Vieux Carré; for that matter, this classic drink of rye, cognac, sweet vermouth, Benedictine and bitters had even fallen from favor in the Crescent City. But when Christopher Ware introduced it to the Alamo City he did so with a bang — or rather a barrel, using it as the first in a series of barrel-aged cocktails he trotted out to acclaim at the shuttered Arcade Midtown Kitchen. It was instructive to taste the freshly made cocktail next to one with some age on it — and it was a toss-up as to which was the better.

Now the head honcho at Paramour, Ware is reprising his barrel program there; the aged Old Fashioned has already become a go-to fave, served over large-format ice (another compulsory component we were blissfully unaware of until a couple of years ago), of course.

ALTERNATE DELIVERY SYSTEMS: If booze can be barreled, it can also be bottled, and several local bars have taken to doing just that. The approach varies, to be sure. At 34 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

Tiki cocktails — from Brooklynite to Concrete Jungle — weren’t a staple until recently .

Barbaro, seasonal sodas are created and capped, with the intent of pairing them with a range of liquors — say salted watermelon to be mixed with gin, mezcal, tequila or vodka.

Bottled drinks with booze included have been done at Blue Box, Cured and for special events at Dorcol Distilling Company. Consistency and quicker service during slam time is the biggest advantage, which is shared with premade cocktails pushed through pressurized lines — with no appreciable loss in quality if the drink to be dispensed is carefully considered. Unless you prefer a different ratio for the classic Negroni, for example, (it’s usually equal parts gin, sweet vermouth and Campari), there’s no reason not to order one on tap at The Last Word. Ware will be doing his own tapped ‘tails at Paramour as well.

MAKE MINE MEZCAL: San Antonio is not alone in its recent, come-to-cuixe (a mezcal varietal) conversion — in fact, we may even be a little ahead of the curve on this one thanks to pioneers such as Houston Eaves at The Esquire and Mezcalería Mixtli. I usually prefer this smoky, sultry spirit straight, a concept that itself might have been almost unthinkable until recently, and both of the above bars have superb selections distilled from different agaves, making slow sipping an adventure in terroir trotting. But using it in cocktails can also pay

off big time — even in simple drinks such as Mexico’s mainline Paloma, usually a mix of tequila and grapefruit soda. For the introduction to not only espadin mezcal but also to Cocchi Americano and xtabentún (Google these, please), try Esquire’s Texecutioner. Look to Mezcalería for, say, another espadin shaken with pineapple, lime, chile-inflected Ancho Reyes and piloncillo in the Humo Empiñado.

THE AVIATION: There is some confusion about this venerable cocktail — at one point it apparently contained both crème de violette and maraschino liqueur along with gin, then the violette got dropped, only to have the drink come back with violette and gin, sans maraschino, in the guise of a Blue Moon. The fact that both crème de violette and its analog, Crème Yvette, were unavailable for a long period of time didn’t help matters. Today, most San Antonio bartenders at all familiar with the Aviation, a personal favorite, will go back to the old formula with both liqueurs. The drink is a gorgeous grayed violet color, has a haunting flavor lifted by lemon juice and is deceptively potent. Toss the term out to your favorite bartender and see what he or she does with it. If you get a blank stare, consider changing bars — we’ve come that far.

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1416 N Main Ave, San Antonio, TX78212 (210) 320-5111 sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 35

NIGHTLIFE

IMBIBING IN STYLE 3 outfit ideas to try during the San Antonio Cocktail Conference

Match the gorgeous backdrops during the San Antonio Cocktail Conference — The Majestic Theatre, The St. Anthony Hotel, twinkly Houston Street — while upping San Antonio’s attire game once and for all.

We tapped Elsa Fernandez, owner of Eye Candy Boutique to style three easy-to-replicate outfits using locally owned boutiques.

BRYAN RINDFUSS

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

BOHO NIGHT OUT “I elevated the look by adding more statement accessories — the vest, the strappy heels, the necklace. It also helps to mix textures within the outfit,” said Fernandez.

So even if the foundation of the outfit is built using solids, the upscale look can still be achieved. For Pantone fanatics, one of the colors of the year is rose quartz, and is found in the trousers featured here — you’ll be seeing plenty of it as spring comes around, but early adopters will want to don this hue ASAP. • Rose Quartz pleated trousers, Montage • Sueded jersey top, Niche • Textured faux animal vest, Woven Boutique • Strappy stilettos, Woven Boutique • Rose Quartz & Mint statement necklace, Woven Boutique 36 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

TAILORED IN TULLE Polished, comfortable and trés chic, the last outfit comes straight out of Eye Candy Boutique. Pair your favorite twirl-worthy skirt with a pressed button down and textured sweater and done.

“Give into your animal instincts with the addition of snake print flats,” Fernandez said.

• Burgundy tulle skirt (1-3X), Eye Candy Boutique • Button up denim chambray top, Eye Candy Boutique • Faux mohair sweater, Eye Candy Boutique • Charcoal statement necklace, Eye Candy Boutique • Mixed media “Flaw Less” slippers, Woven Boutique • Structured faux snake skin/leopard print clutch, Woven Boutique

NIGHTLIFE

Find the looks at Eye Candy Boutique (531 Navarro St., 210-363-3572); Niche Clothing Co. (1223 E. Euclid Ave., 210344-1182); Montage Vintage (423 W. Grayson St., 210324-0157); Woven Boutique (22806 281 N., 210-4621993). Call for pricing.

STREET CHIC Put that holiday glam to use again. For this look, Fernandez suggests being bold with your choices. Don’t be afraid to mix metals — the dress features bronze polka dots, the studs on the jacket are silver and the chains on the booties are gold. She recommends throwing on a studded or spiked layering piece (in this case the jacket), adding a statement necklace and hitting the cocktails.

“This one’s all about using what you already have in your closet,” Fernandez said.

Bonus, it transitions well from daytime (use a cardigan or blazer) to nighttime.

• Polka dot, structured, fit & flair dress, Woven Boutique • Spiked faux leather jacket, Woven Boutique • Mixed media statement necklace, Montage • Chained black booties, Eye Candy Boutique

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SARAMPAGE.COM 38 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

NIGHTLIFE

LIBATIONS & LEARNING

School is in session.

5 (or so) classes not to miss

RON BECHTOL

Having been on the organizing end of an event much like the San Antonio Cocktail Conference (SACC), I understand all too well how challenging it is to pull everything together. Presenters and participants often play hard to get, extracting detailed information on class and event content, along with up-todate bio information, can be an exercise in frustration … and that’s just on the people end of things.

Attendees see little of this, of course. But that doesn’t mean that there isn’t some frustration to be had on the consumer end when it comes to picking events and seminars; inevitably, two or more you might really want to check out are scheduled at the same or close to the same time. But that’s what the San Antonio Current is here for. Based on the best information on hand at the time of writing, these are the classes/seminars most likely to appeal to the serious cocktail geek. Unless noted, all are at the Sheraton Gunter Hotel, the conference’s headquarters.

Friday morning: There’s entertainment value to be had in two events, a multi-topic TED Talk-like presentation called SA 15 and another discussing cocktails in pop culture. But there’s nothing like handson experience to drive points home, so I suggest the reprise of a class I took last year, called Mixology 101: Build Your Own Cocktail that begins at 11:30 a.m.

The presenter is “The Cocktail Guru,” Jonathan Pogash, and there will be the inevitable PowerPoint presentation, but there should also be samplings of ingredients and, at the end, the chance to put together your own personalized drink from a pretty wide range of products.

You will have to drink and run, however, as this class ends at 1 p.m. — just as the next one starts.

Friday afternoon: The Flavors of Mexico is a new class, sponsored by Altos Tequila — but we assume sponsorship means that the company’s brand ambassador and her “culinary expert” sidekick can accordingly be generous with samples as they discuss foods and cocktails from the Yucatán to Baja and beyond.

It should be a good armchair tour. But if you’d prefer not to sprint between seminar spaces, Herbal Remedies begins at 1:30 just down the street at The Last Word.

Here, author Emily Han will lead a seminar on “the fascinating history and present-day use of bitters from herbal remedies to craft cocktails.” Bitters and cocktails will be tasted and you’ll craft your own take-home blend from sundry botanicals. This one should appeal to both serious civilians and industry pros alike.

Saturday morning: This is the most frustrating time period, with at least three overlapping seminars I’d

personally like to attend: Madeira Understood, Tequila and Xocolatl and Time to Check Out That Other ‘Yack: Armagnac, all starting at 11:30 a.m.

The Madeira seminar has the advantage of lots of samples of a mostly (to me, anyway) unfamiliar product — not to mention well-known Houston bar luminary Alba Huerta as a co-presenter. Tequila and chocolate are equally unfamiliar as a couple, Milagro Tequila’s J.P. de Loera is both animated and knowledgeable and there is the hook of “a full range of pairings of agave-forward Milagro Tequila with various chocolates and cacao-inspired beverages.” And who knows enough about Armagnac? Did you know that its production predates that of Cognac? Not me, so I’m also tempted by both the history and spirits educator May Matta-Aliah’s guided tasting of several examples. Don’t know about you, but I’m going to toss a coin here.

Saturday afternoon: Fortunately, this is easier — at least for me: I’m heading straight for Why Rye, Why Now? (1:30 p.m.), billed as a “fun and interactive” lecture and discussion “on the history of rye whiskey, why it went away and why it’s coming back so strong.” But

then I’m obsessed, and I won’t think any less of you if you choose instead Jalapen-Oh-No-You Didn’t (3 p.m.).

There’s potential fun for all as “the spicy margarita and its compadres will get a much-needed facelift in this seminar designed for cocktail enthusiasts, foodies and cocktail bartenders.” Participants “will explore all manner of spices and their effects across a variety of base spirits.”

Might as well go out with a bang.

The SACC runs from January 14-17, check the conference website, sacocktailconference.com for tickets and updates. sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 39

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41 NIGHTLIFE

PARTY OF FIVE

CLUB SiRIUS

5 can’t-miss events for this year’s Cocktail Conference JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

It’s worth repeating that I’m never really quite ready for the San Antonio Cocktail Conference. Each year means different events, the need for several cute/ comfortable/classy outfits and all the water I can find. This year’s conference is no different. Here are our top picks for can’t-miss events, both new and old.

Women Shaking It Up: If I were to implore anyone in San Antonio to visit an event during the week-long affair, this might be it. The first-ever event shines the spotlight on women in the industry through a screening of Jeret Peña’s latest mini-documentary endeavor, Women of Tin, which features bartenders Karah Carmack, Elisabeth Forsythe and Hillary Woodhouse. After the screening, guests will be treated to drinks mixed by female bartenders, and bites by female chefs, including Heather Hernandez of Bohanan’s, Brooke Smith of The Esquire Tavern, Lisa Astorga of Bite, Diana Barrios of Los Barrios, Margeaux Alcorta of Tre Enoteca and Cariño Cortez of Viva Villa Taqueria. $65, 7-10pm Wednesday, Arneson River Theater & La Villita, 418 Villita St., (210) 472-2211, sananatoniococktailconference.com.

Honoring Sasha Petraske: This event is a bit of a two-for-one.

Last August, the cocktail world lost a visionary when SACC co-founder Sasha Petraske passed away at 42.

To honor his legacy, Bohanan’s will host a roundtable discussion about his influence (4:30-6 p.m. Thursday) with industry members. A Daiquiri Hour (Petraske’s favorite) will be held immediately after with proceeds

from sales benefiting Houston Street Charities. This is not a ticketed event.

Opening Night At The Majestic: Do you love cocktails, glitz and a total bash? Then don’t pass on this event which features plenty of craft cocktails and bites as you weave your way on to the Majestic’s stage (you may or may not want to re-enact that scene from The Book of Mormon while there). $85, 7-10pm, The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 472-2211, sananatoniococktailconference.com.

Stroll on Houston Street: Do I love Friday’s event at the St. Anthony Hotel? Yes. BUT, if for some insane reason tickets aren’t available, get thee to Houston Street on Saturday. The night includes a takeover of the street as bookended by Bohanan’s and Lüke San Antonio, with more than 20 restaurant options to choose from including plenty of cocktails along the way. Weekend bonus: Catch one of two pop-up bars being set up at Studio 109 (no tickets required, cocktails are purchased a la carte, between Travis & Soledad streets, 10 p.m. to midnight). Chicago’s Bordel sets up shop on Friday evening while Distilled NY brings their New American Public House to SA on Saturday. $85, 7-10pm, Houston Street between Navarro & Soledad, (210) 472-2211, sananatoniococktailconference.com.

Tasting Suites: Brand ambassadors showing off liquor must-haves on Saturday with tons of great tastes?

Sign me up. $45, noon-4pm, Suites at Valencia & Historic Frost Building, 217 E. Houston St., (210) 472-2211, sananatoniococktailconference.com. flavor@sacurrent.com

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sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 41

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42 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

43 NIGHTLIFE

COCKTAILS & CIGARS

Tips for nailing that tobacco pairing JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

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Don’t waste good spirits or cigars.

Confession: Though I can’t recommend having one on a frequent basis, enjoying a cigar has turned into a guilty pleasure of sorts. And I’m not alone if the crowded lounges and patios at area humidors are to be believed.

When the San Antonio Cocktail Conference announced this year’s lineup, I was most intrigued by Cigar Pairing: Cocktails and Otherwise set for Saturday, January 16 from 1:30 to 2:45 p.m. Held on the rooftop of the newly renovated St. Anthony Hotel (300 E. Travis St.), because you can’t smoke cigars inside the hotel suites, silly, the event will feature Greg Mays of simplecocktails.com, a blog that specializes in making bar experts out of home bartenders. In case you’re not able to make the seminar (priced at $55, but how can you beat that view, amirite?), Mays offered a few tips on how to make the most of your cigar-smoking and spirit-pairing experience.

For the Newbs: Spend some time with your local tobacconist (yes, this is a real word). Share your likes, dislikes and what you’d like out of your smoking experience — whether it’s a mild cigar with strong flavors or rather a strong cigar with mild flavors.

“Have your tobacconist recommend a

handful of different ones, then take them home and try them. Note which are your favorite and why,” Mays said via email.

What to Avoid: Sorry gin fans. This herbal spirit usually doesn’t click with our stogies — same for some vodkas and licorice-laden absinthe.

Seminar attendees will taste cocktails that will pair with cigars and others that won’t.

Try New Things: It would make sense if one were to take a drag of a Cuban cigar to pair it with an island rum, right? According to Mays, aged rums with their medleys of spices should be making an appearance in your rocks glass.

“Some smokers know this already, but it has a long way to go to catch up to scotch and cognac,” Mays said. This also applies to sweet and/or creamy cocktails and liquors — think White Russians, Averna and vanilla-forward vodka on the rocks to start.

Stick with Sweet Wines: This one’s kind of a duh. Think Port and Cognac and avoid rich, buttery vinos (such as oak-aged Chardonnay).

“There are some red wine-based cocktails that go well with cigars, too,” said Mays.

Get to your nearest humidor. flavor@sacurrent.com

6957 SAN PEDRO RD. • 210-348-6902 | 5117 FREDERICKSBURG RD. • 210-348-9401

sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 43

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sanantoniocomedyclubs.com 44 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

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MUSIC

COMPOSING THE AMERICAS

•

Pianist, and Tony Parker pal, Vincent Balse

Sebastian Lang-Lessing sounds off on “Las Américas” fest TRAVIS BUFFKIN | @DTBUFFKIN

Music from North, Central and South America has arrived in the Alamo City via the San Antonio Symphony’s sixth annual winter music festival, “Las Américas.”

The musical celebration began on January 5 and lasts through February 23, featuring works curated by symphony conductor Sebastian Lang-Lessing, including a highlight of "the most American" of music: jazz. Performances include George Gershwin’s ode to the boom and bustle of 20th century living, Rhapsody in Blue; his Cuban Overture; I Got Rhythm, Variations for Piano and Symphony; and Catfish Row: Symphonic Suite from Porgy and Bess.

Also featured at the January 15, 16 and 17 concerts will be a medley of Duke Ellington, and other-halfof-his-heartbeat, Billy Strayhorn, essentials arranged by renowned pops conductor Jeff Tyzik, along with Harlem, the Duke’s ode to his African-American Sanssouci.

Interestingly, Tony Parker’s longtime friend Vincent Balse will be the featured pianist, so keep an eye out for number nine.

I spoke with Lang-Lessing from his home in Berlin about his selections for the festival, particularly the pieces by Gershwin, Ellington and Strayhorn, and how they, and jazz, convey American-ness.

“With most jazz musicians you can go from piano solo to trio to quintet to brass to big band, and then it’s just the next logical stop to go to symphony orchestra without sacrificing the spirit of the piece and

the freedom of jazz performance, Bess, or the sophisticated swing which is fantastic … If anything of Ellington and Strayhorn, is surely defines American music, it’s jazz," something to behold. he said.

“Gershwin, for me, is very This freedom is, of course, interesting because Gershwin is essential to the idea of the not an African-American … he American Experience, something absorbed jazz in a symphonic way that Lang-Lessing is cognizant like nobody did before him. He was of and takes into account when the one making jazz symphonic and conducting. integrating jazz into classical music “Jazz is a very personal thing. It’s … and Gershwin then defined what not just one style. Even if you play became really ‘American,’” Langthe same tune or the same music, Lessing went on. it’s very personal how you approach The tenacity of a composer it. This will be evident, I think, when like Gershwin, a Jew from the we do it,” he said.

Northeast, to compose something I asked the maestro if like the Cuban Overture, his interpretation of such is telling. It’s not only San Antonio Symphony’s heavy pieces, such as adventurous, but a feat.

“Las Américas” FestiPorgy and Bess, colors One of the exciting val: Rhapsody in Blue $25-$96 his performance and things about symphonic 8pm Fri & Sat, Jan. 15-16, the performance of the music is that when 2pm Sun, Jan. 17 symphony. composers, musicians Tobin Center for the Performing Arts “Sometimes, in a and conductors attempt 100 Auditorium Circle piece like Porgy and something outside of (210) 223-8624 Bess, when we do their realm, they have to tobincenter.org Catfish Row, of course, invest themselves in it the anger that is in the piece and completely. Otherwise they come the fear — fear, anger, hopelessness off as charlatans vacationing in — is probably today as relevant exoticism, and that is something as it was in 1935 … I don’t think that is not abided in their sphere. it’s a Broadway piece, I think it’s And something of which other an opera, it’s 20th century opera. genres could take note.

So, for me it’s not like a happy “It’s music that speaks to Broadway-tune piece, it’s a political the soul, directly. The style is piece, and for me it’s as relevant as important but you don’t need to it was at that time … there’s a lot know anything about jazz, about of violence in it, of course, and I’m symphonic music to enjoy this. gonna bring it out," he explained.

It goes directly to the heart,” he The firepower of an 80-piece said. symphony, not only being a shiny, A free simulcast screening of the spruced-up vehicle for the industrial concert will be shown in the River romanticism of Gershwin, the Walk Plaza at the Tobin Center on anxious hostility of Porgy and Friday, January 15 at 8 p.m.

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46 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

QUEENSRŸCHE RETURNS TO SAN ANTONIO Still iconic, still Queensrÿche ZACH MARCOTTE

Growing up in San Antonio comes with a certain inherent knowledge — it’s strange really, like some sort of cultural awareness or collective consciousness. We all know it. Some accept it, some embrace it and some deny it for one reason or another. But, the fact remains, San Antonio is a hard rock and heavy metal city, and that’s badass — so deal with it, you naysayers.

The shared memories are forged into a near folk legend legacy, first-hand accounts mixed with stories shared at cul-de-sac barbecues, bars or shows. These experiences become a part of us. Queensrÿche is one of those names that has been embedded in the fabric of rock ‘n’ roll. If you aren’t already a fan, you know somebody who is. We all know something about them, somehow, whether it is a few licks on the guitar (Mark Focus), a vocal melody, or some story regarding the group. Life-shaping accounts of the Joe and Harry Freeman Coliseum along with the Sunken Garden Theater are often shared in the same sentence with Queensrÿche. You know the name. You’ve seen it in the patches of the denim or leather of the long (or short) hairs. You’ve seen it on the T-shirts of the smart prog rock guy at school, Robot Monster Guitars, or wherever.

You’ve heard your neighbor, dad, uncle and friend talk about them with nothing but respect and fondness.

Queensrÿche is a technically proficient, solid progressive metal band that has withstood the test of time. With a career greater than 30 years, they have undergone some lineup changes in the not-too-distant past. But, after listening to what the latest formation is all about, the passion and fire are still there, if not more so with the newest members. If I didn’t know about the member changes and heard their latest album, Condition Hüman, I would have thought, “Wow, this sounds like Queensrÿche, a little more aggressive with a nod to some modern influence and a particular punch to it, but still, definitely Queensrÿche,” which is a pretty impressive thing to pull off. But, after all, this is Queensrÿche we’re talking about – they’re professionals.

I talked with vocalist Todd La Torre about what it’s like being the “new” frontman in the band. La Torre is a cool, confident and easy-to-talk-to professional. He’s younger than the founding members and explains what it’s like joining a band he listened to while growing up.

“Speaking as an outsider, as a fan of the band and the music — you want to say 'I kind of seamlessly integrated

•

Queensrÿche: forging on in a new millennium

into what they are.' However, people’s musical tastes band is known for.” change in different ways. I feel that instead of merging La Torre notes that “people are always going to into their traffic and flow of things I’ve actually come in compare you to the original guy, it’s going on four years and t-boned a few things and spun some cars out and since I’ve been in the band. Each show we play we said, ‘Hey, now we’re on track.’ By them moving on, are proving ourselves, that’s very much a part of the they’ve had a huge barrier lifted from them creatively equation. Some people are gonna love it, some people where they’re not being told songs are too heavy or that are not gonna like me. I know I’m not going to be able kind of thing. Because I’m more of a metal guy and I to please everybody. That’s with everything. There’s like doing a lot of the harder, heavier music, I think that nothing you can do to change that. It’s really a matter of definitely was a factor in why the band and material how good you are.” sounds this way. I’m able to bring that element back to There is more than one person that makes a band what the band that was missing for a very long time. I don’t say they are. Sure, some individuals make a stronger impact it with malice, I’m just being very pragmatic.” or have a stronger imprint on the identity of the The old school Queensrÿche purists have band but sometimes people change, bands nothing to fear, La Torre explained that they are Queensrÿche change and lineups change. The band’s rock $26-$30 “still playing a lot of the great songs from the 'n’roll legacy goes on. What La Torre brings to 6pm Fri, Jan. 15 first five or six albums of the band.” The new Queensrÿche is a perfect example of a legacy Alamo City Music Hall sound “translates a little balls-ier, with a little that is continuing to be built. See for yourself 1305 E. Houston St. more bite, but still has all the dynamics that the alamocitymusichall.com Friday, January 15 at the Alamo City Music Hall. sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 47

Friday January 15th

48 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

ORIGINAL ARTYFACTS FROM ACROSS THE GLOBE Yippee Ki Yay Records explores garage rock worldwide MATT STIEB/@MATTHEWSTIEB

What does it mean to be a record label in 2016? For many small labels, the game plan is curation. Gone and forgotten are the days of mass financial gain, so imprints act like living galleries, showcasing exceptional and like-minded works. In Brooklyn, Captured Tracks supports jangly post-punk and pop bands composed of could-be models (and Mac DeMarco). In a strip mall in Fullerton, California, Burger Records puts out charismatic, yet simple rock ‘n’ rollers who can MacGyver a working bong out of any object.

Here in South Texas, the Yippee Ki Yay Records catalog reads like a passport, stamped with garage rock destinations from across the globe. With music from Argentina, Sweden, Waco and Spain, label head and San Anto native Ryan Smith treats his operation like a child spinning a globe, putting his finger on farflung destinations to find out what’s going down in the basements and dive bars of the world.

“I really wanted Yippee Ki Yay to be a vehicle, not only for local artists in San Antonio or in Texas, but to also help import things and expose people in Texas and the United States to music from abroad, too,” Smith told the San Antonio Current.

Conveniently for Texans, the Lone Star State carries some import across the border. Smith named the label after the cowboy’s yelp to “channel our Texan roots into something fun and quirky.” And for branding, nothing works as well as the label’s simple pennant of the iconic state.

“There’s only about two or three states where you can say the name of the state and people will respond to that,” said Smith. “If you show its shape to somebody in Japan, they’ll say, ‘Oh yeah, that’s Texas.’”

Founded in January 2014, Yippee Ki Yay’s first release was from Parisian fuzz rats Bacon Fudge, a tape of bad attitude, low fidelity and captivating punk energy. From this foundation, Smith brought it back home for a split tape with local troublemakers The Bolos and The Oblio’s before branching out with strong efforts from Argentina’s Las Piñas and Sweden’s Baby Jesus.

Released last week, the latest of Yippee Ki Yay’s dozen-strong catalog is No Fun Whatsoever, a 10-track effort from sloppy Australian trio Los Scallywags. Like the

•

From our garage to yours, Smith curates his globespanning roster.

rest of the YKY catalog, the tape is welcome wherever hips are shaking, denim is well-worn and cheap whiskey is flowing like there’s no tomorrow.

There’s an uncanny resemblance between members of the Yippee Ki Yay family. Despite the distance between locales — 8,349 miles from San Antonio to Los Scallywag’s home in New Castle, Australia — YKY bands maintain a strong commitment to the garage aesthetic.

“It doesn’t really matter what language it’s in, it’s still communicating the same thing,” said Smith. “You listen to Las Piñas and you get the same feeling from it that you get from La Luz, Best Coast or Hinds, even though it’s in Spanish.”

In America, the garage rock revival gets some flack for its sameness — that every Burger blondie and guitar trio sounds like the band that came before it in the set.

But it speaks to the appeal of the music that garage is flourishing on six out of seven continents. (Who knows, maybe there’s a garage combo of penguins and scientists playing “Louie Louie” in an Antarctic research center).

“It’s very accessible, I like how accessible it is to

people,” said Smith. “You don’t need a whole bunch of fancy moves, you can buy the cheapest guitar imaginable, a kid’s guitar, a kid’s drumset like the Coachwhips do, and it’s incredible and fun and amazing.”

Unfortunately, as accessible as the music is within each country, trying to export your music on tour is exceedingly difficult. In addition to the usual problems of securing a visa, federal taxes cut 30 percent of a band’s show guarantee, to say nothing of state taxes and tariffs in a band’s home country. Designed to get a cut of U2 and Muse’s paycheck while touring through the States, the tax devastates the already dubious chances for a small band to come back from tour in the black.

“In terms of bringing an international artist to the United States, it is mind-blowingly difficult,” said Smith. “It’s not like they come here and soak up money and leave. They’re spending money, they’re going to restaurants, there’s lots of different ways they’re interacting with the economy.”

So, like outfits in San Anto and South Texas, the best way to support an antipodal band is to buy their stuff.

Yippee Ki Yay, motherfucker! sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 49

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MUSIC

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Crazy Spirit

‘Crazy’ bands always seem disappointing. Almost without fail they’re unabashedly terrible (Crazy Frog, Crazy Town) or, even when they're good (Crazy Horse), far from anything their name should suggest. But what if a ‘crazy’ band actually were, like, crazy? New York hardcore outfit Crazy Spirit certainly seems to fit the bill. For the past six years, they’ve been unrelentingly cranking out the same barelyaudible scuzz-punk, furiously touring the country and generally terrifying audiences with their frenzied presence. They’ve also started drawing results from their relentless approach to hardcore, gathering a rapid following around their mosh-ready sound, especially their singer’s reptilian snarl, which sounds something like the Germs’ Darby Crash with a throat infection. Sharing the Paper Tiger bill with Crazy Spirit are Austin punk-stalwarts Total Abuse, whose sound leans a little cleaner but no less pummeling. They’ve ridden a 2013 reunion to an excellent new EP Looking For Love and an impressive number of shows, including an SA set last year. Opening are Houston post-punks Filthy, who’ll bring a melodic (if you consider Joy Division melodic) edge to the bill, and up-and-coming San Antonio outfit Hötzi. $5, 8pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com –J.D. Swerzenski

Wednesday, January 13

#Fuzznites Feat. Blithe, Black Liquid Drop and Shiva's Medicine Chest Garage hucksters Osita Anusi and Nicholas Ivarra curate the weekly trip to the garage for a Bud, a bump and bong rip. Limelight, 9pm Gen-Y Wednesdays: '90s Night Parachute pants, rat-tails, Reebok Pumps and Hanson, what a great time to be alive.

Drink through the memories with other barely legals. Amp Room, 7pm The Legendary Shack Shakers Fronted by the inimitable J.D. Wilkes, the Shack Shakers mainline the fierce carnality of punk rock into the red, white and blue vein of Americana, showing young upstarts a thing or two about ye auld rocke 'n' rolle.

With The Yawpers and The Grim Folks.

Korova, 7:30pm

DreamWeek 2016 Presents Jazz in the Key of Free Featuring special guests of the SA jazz pantheon. Jazz. Martin Luther King.

Beer. If you're against any of this trifecta of awesomeness, please move. Alamo Beer Co., 8pm

Hail the Sun Chico, California's Hail the Sun keep the post-hardcore song title bar set high with "Sleep Now and Forever Wet Your Dreams," and "Crying is Only Manly When Splinters Come Out." With Makari, Oranges, The Signature and The Void.

Korova, 6pm Smoke Season and The Peach Kings Texas Tour Smoke Season blends Americana with electronic undertones for a sound that critics call “ethereal western soul.”

Jack’s Bar, 8pm

Tool and Primus With their dark Brothers Quay-ripoff stop motion music videos and fanatic fan base, Tool's elaborate story lines and progressive rock tendencies are cloaked in a "sinister" metal wrapping. With 3Teeth. AT&T Center, 7:30pm

Friday, January 15

Cock Block Thursdays Phantom Room returns with their weekly Lesbian night hosted by Phanie Diaz of hometown heroes Girl in a Coma and FEA. Phantom Room, 9pm

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Oh Bleep! Wednesdays Show hump day who's boss by going up (to the rooftop) on a Wednesday. With Pierce Fulton, Derrick Rage, Harwell & Marrs and Katabolic. Lush Rooftop, 10pm

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Eric Tessmer Band The E.T. band throw fuzz on the bonfire of Americana blues steering just clear of frat rock. Sam’s Burger Joint, 9pm Johnny Hootrock Norwegian frontman Clem Hoot leads this adept Texas psychobilly trio, reinforcing the Norwegian connection with the Southern American genre. With The Lucky Odds. The Mix, 10pm Music Unites Featuring fishermen, Deer Vibes, Foreign Arm, Desmond Fahie and

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121 BROADWAY • (210)271-1058 52 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

Vocab. Some of the city's landmark indie bands unite to unite. Carver Community Cultural Center, 6pm Soulspot Second Annual "I Have A Dream" Community Dance Celebration In honor of MLK day, get down with one of the city's most knowledgable turntablists, JJ Lopez. Tucker's Kozy Korner, 8pm

Saturday, January 16

Blackbird Sing and Nicolette Good Feat.

Joe Reyes Alternative honky tonk 'n' roll from local boys who've worked their way up from the Strip to a Texas touring machine. One of San Antonio's finest songwriters, Nicolette Good, presents tracks off her impressive debut, Monarch, and its mature follow-up. Majestic Theatre, 9pm George Garza Jr. Half of the rhythm section of interstellar indie outfit Pop Pistol, George Garza presents his own works. With Xes Xes and Krishna Monks. Imagine Books, 8pm Happiness is a Choice: DreamWeek Night Out With Roxy Roca Signed to Snag Records, Roxy Roca proudly play "green-eyed soul," utilizing all of the spirit that an octet can muster.

Luna, 8pm Los #3 Dinners Since the late ’70s, Los #3 Dinners have been a San Anto institution with tunes like “Take a Walk on the West Side,” “South Presa Man” and “Livin’ Inside the Loop.” Amp Room, 9pm

Sunday, January 17

A Night With DJ Chicken George One of Austin's premier DJs and the man behind the tables for Third Root teams up with San Anto's formidable vinyl slangers.

Featuring Donnie Dee, DJ Gibb, Chorizo Funk, Leonard Trujillo and JJ Lopez.

Hi-Tones, 9pm Café Colombia Part of the "Las Americas" city-wide music festival. Harpist Edmar Castaneda has taken the jazz world by storm with the sheer force of his virtuosic command. It's jazz harp, people! San Fernando Cathedral, 6:30pm Set Me Free Concert Series Feat. Thelonious Love & Friends Thelonious Love mashes the heightened consciousness of a Terence McKenna with the righteous fire and political intellect of a Malcolm X. Guadalupe Cultural Arts Center, 2pm Vitera Armed with a kinda-cool, cartoonish electric Flying V violin – aka Viper – Vitera makes the semi-silly instrument work with his inspired blend of Sunset Strip metal and south-of-the-border latin flair.

Aztec Theatre, 4pm

Monday, January 18

Colin Hay As the brains behind pub rock Aussies Men at Work, the gripping melodies and sunglasses-at-night-'tude of "Down Under," "Who Could it Be Now," and "Overkill" has reinforced Hay's position as one of the Outback's elite pop songwriters. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 7:30pm

Quiet Company Austin's Quiet Company pick up where Death Cab for Cutie left off, riffing on the landmark tunes of The O.C. soundtrack. With The Kickback. Paper Tiger, 8pm

Swing Nite with Candye Kane If her bigboned jazz vocals and former porn career don't get you all hot and bothered, you have no love for jazzy blues. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8:30pm

Spine Chicago's Spine are moving the goalposts of post-hardcore back to the arena of punk. With United Races, Afflictive Nature, Bloodhound and Stacked Against. K23 Gallery, 7pm

Tuesday, January 19

Michael J. & The Foxes The honky tonk side project of Deer Vibes' Michael Carrillo continue their January residency. 502 Bar, 9pm

502 Bar 502 Embassy Oaks Drive, (210) 257-8125, 502bar.com Alamo Beer Co. 415 Burnet St., (210) 872-5589, alamobeer.com AT&T Center 1 AT&T Center Pkwy., (210) 444-5140, attcenter.com Aztec Theatre 104 N. St.Mary's St., (210) 812-4355, theaztectheatre.com Carver Community Cultural Center 226 N. Hackberry St., (210) 2077211, thecarver.org Guadalupe Cultural Arts Center 723 Brazos St., (210) 271-3151, guadalupeculturalarts.org Hi-Tones 621 E. Dewey Pl., (210) 573-6220, hitonessa.com Imagine Books & Records 8373 Culebra Road, (210) 236-7668, imaginebookstore.com Jack’s Patio Bar 3030 Thousand Oaks Drive, (210) 494-2309, jacksbarsa.com K23 Gallery 703 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 776-5635, facebook.com/K23Gallery Limelight 2718 N. St. Mary’s St., thelimelightsa.com Luna 6740 San Pedro Ave., lunalive.com Lush Rooftop 4553 N. Loop 1604, (210) 858-9028, facebook.com/lushrooftop Majestic Theatre 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-5700, majesticempire.com Paper Tiger 2410 N. St Mary’s St., papertigersa.com Phantom Room 2106 N. St. Mary’s St. Sam’s Burger Joint 330 E. Grayson St., (210) 223-2830, samsburgerjoint.com San Fernando Cathedral 115 Main Plaza, (210) 227-1297 The Amp Room 2407 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 320-2122, theamproom.com The Korova 107 E. Martin St., (210) 2265070, thekorova.com The Mix 2403 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-1313 Tobin Center for the Performing Arts 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, tobincenter.org Tucker's Kozy Korner 1338 E. Houston St., (210) 320-2192

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by Dan Savage

Some Introspective View Examined First, PENSIVE, “enjoys giving women orgasms” sets the bar for “ardent feminist” just a bit low. So here’s hoping your feminism involves more than penetrating a willing partner with your fingers, tongue, cock and whatever vibrators happen to be lying around. Because if your feminism doesn’t include support for pro-choice policies and candidates, regular donations to Planned Parenthood, backing equal pay for equal work, speaking up when other men say shitty/rapey/dehumanizing things about women (particularly when there isn’t a woman in the room whose pussy you want to lick until you come, because feminism!) — and more — then you’re not a feminist, ardent or otherwise.

Moving on … Why did it turn you on when the sex worker took a call during your session? Because it did. Turn-ons are subjective and mysterious. People who are curious about their turn-ons have to start with “this turns me on” and work backward from there. And to figure out why a particular fabric/adornment/attitude/ scenario arouses us, we use the only tools available to us — guesswork and self-serving rationalizations — to invent a backstory that makes some sort of logical sense, and then we apply it to something (kinks, turn-ons, orgasms) that really defies logic.

So, PENSIVE, if I were to hazard some guesswork on your behalf, I’d probably go with this: Being treated with passive contempt by someone that you are supposed to be wielding power over (the woman you’re fucking, a sex worker you’ve hired)— being subtly humiliated and mildly degraded by that woman — taps a vein of eroticized self-hatred that makes you come quickly and come hard.

And while that’s wonderful for you, PENSIVE, it isn’t proof you’re a feminist.

Listen to Dan’s podcast every week at savagelovecast.com. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter

Check out fresh daily content at sacurrent.com

I’m a 45-year-old straight male.

Politically and socially, I consider myself an ardent feminist. There is nothing I enjoy more than giving a woman an orgasm or two.

I’m very GGG and will cheerfully do whatever it takes. Fingers, tongue, cock, vibrator — I’m in.

If it takes a long time, so much the better. I’m okay with all of that. Now and again, though, I really like a quickie, a good oldfashioned “Wham, bam, thank you, ma’am! ” The only ladies I’ve found willing to engage in those cock-centric acts are sex workers. I’m okay with that, too.

But the last time I paid for it, with a woman I had patronized before, I was just about to slip my cock in doggy-style when her phone rang.

It was in reach, and she picked it up! I hesitated, but she didn’t pull away, and in fact pushed back a bit while she answered. I figured this was what I came for, so I proceeded. Her cavalier attitude toward being fucked from behind while having a trivial phone conversation wound up being a huge turn-on for me. By the time she finished her 20-second call, I was finished as well. I hadn’t come that quickly since I was a teen. She laughed that she should take calls more often. What kind of beast am I that I really enjoyed such utter indifference? Does this reveal some dark secret deep in my psyche? How can that mesh with my otherwise feminist views?

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Have Genital or Anal Warts and looking for options?

“Let Free Entertain You” — you know the freestyle drill.

ACROSS

You’re not alone.

A con fi resea dential rch st is e n r udy ol and y ling now, ou m a eligib y be le.

The Novan SB206 clinical research study is testing a topical investigational medication to see if it may help people who have genital or anal warts. If you’re 18 to 50 years old and qualify, you may receive the following: / Investigational medication for genital/anal warts / Study-related care from a local doctor / Compensation for time and travel All study medication and study-related care will be at no cost to you. Your health is very important to us, and will be monitored throughout the study.

Get started. Find out more about the Novan SB206 study.

Scan this code or visit: www.MyWartStudy.com ASP0047-NOVAN-FLYER-v02-29-APRIL-2015

56 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

Clinical Trials of Texas, Inc. 7940 Floyd Curl Dr., Suite 700 <<SITE INFO>> TX 78229 San Antonio, 210-949-0122 www.SAresearch.com

1 DIY handicrafts site 5 “If things were to continue like so ...”

15 “The Clothed Maja” painter 16 “Taken” guy 17 Beach bird 18 Tow-away zone destination 19 “10 Items ___” (checkout sign that drives grammarphiles nuts) 21 Ardent admirers 22 They may be collateral when buying new wheels 28 Recede gradually 30 Long-hitting clubs 31 Word before Jon or Wayne 32 No pro show, yo 36 Vigoda who’s still alive 37 Big name in toothbrushes 38 Vaccine target 39 Chuck an attempted threepointer into the stands, e.g.

43 Former British Poet Laureate Hughes 44 Multi-layered dessert popularized in 2015 45 Abbr. after a proof 46 “Go ahead, don’t mind me” 49 11th-graders’ exam (abbr.)

50 Carter and Spelling, for two 53 Cheat 59 Lying over

60 Gambles 61 “Desperate Housewives” actress Hatcher 62 Summer dress uniform component, maybe 63 Cut down to size

DOWN

1 Brand in the frozen breakfast section 2 Go from gig to gig 3 They’re represented by fingers in charades 4 Conn. school 5 Half of the ‘80s synth-pop duo Yaz 6 Comedian Minchin 7 Savion Glover’s specialty 8 PPO alternative 9 ___ START (Tobias’s oftmisinterpreted license plate on “Arrested Development”) 10 Highest Scrabble tile value 11 Animal in a Dr. Seuss title 12 “Chronicles of Narnia” lion 13 Adult Swim fare, for short 14 “Lord of the Rings” tree creatures 20 Ancient Greek portico 23 Place to keep your Tetleys and your Twinings 24 “Mrs. Murphy Mysteries”

author ___ Brown 25 Simile segment, maybe 26 Annoys by staying outside the lines?

27 NYSE symbol for the company that keeps going ... and going ...

28 “Support Your Local Sheriff!” actor Jack 29 Benjamin Netanyahu’s nickname 33 Full of memorable lines 34 “Gold”-en role for Peter Fonda 35 Paul of “Anchorman” 40 Weight training partner 41 Bargain-basement unit 42 “The Memory of Trees” Grammy winner 46 1990 NBA Finals MVP ___ Thomas 47 Nutcase 48 Give a long-winded talk 49 Sgts.’ underlings 51 Edible seaweed used for sushi 52 Roasting device 54 “Was ___ das?”

55 Treasured document?

56 “A Kiss Before Dying” author Levin 57 California red, briefly 58 Suffix with winning

ETC.

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): You love autonomy. You specialize in getting the freedom and sovereignty you require. You are naturally skilled at securing your independence from influences that might constrain your imagination and limit your self-expression. But here’s a sticking point: If you want the power to help shape group processes, you must give up some of your autonomy. In order to motivate allies to work toward shared goals, you need to practice the art of interdependence. The next test of your ability to do this is coming right up.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): “Nothing is really work unless you’d rather be doing something else.” So said Taurus writer James M. Barrie (1860-1937), who created the Peter Pan stories. Your challenge and invitation in the coming months is to increase the amount of time you spend that does not qualify as work. In fact, why don’t you see how much and how often you can indulge in outright play? There’ll be no better way to attract grace and generate good fortune.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): Here’s my proposal: Get in touch with your madness.

And don’t tell me you have no madness. We all do. But listen: When I use the word “madness,” I don’t mean howling rage, hurtful lunacy or out-of-control misbehavior. I’m calling on the experimental part of you that isn’t always polite and reasonable; the exuberant rebel who is attracted to wild truths rather than calming lies; the imaginative seeker who pines for adventures on the frontiers of your understanding. Now is an excellent time to tap into your inner maverick.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): Here’s an excerpt from Dorianne Laux’s poem “Antilamentation”: “Regret nothing. Not the cruel novels you read to the end just to find out who killed the cook. Not the insipid movies that made you cry in the dark. Not the lover you left quivering in a hotel parking lot. Not the nights you called god names and cursed your mother, sunk like a dog in the living room couch, chewing your nails.” I’m giving you a good dose of Laux’s purifying rant in the hope that it will incite you to unleash your own. The time is favorable to summon an expanded appreciation for the twists and tweaks of your past, even those that seemed torturous in the moment.

Laux doesn’t regret the TV set she threw out the upstairs window or the stuck onion rings she had to sweep off the dirty restaurant floor, and I hope you will be that inclusive.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22): “Modesty is the art of drawing attention to whatever it is you’re being humble about,” said Alfred E. Neuman, the fictitious absurdist whose likeness often appears on the cover of Mad magazine.

I’m here to tell you, Leo, that now is an excellent

time to embody this aphorism. You are in a perfect position to launch a charm offensive by being outrageously unassuming. The less you brag about yourself and the more you praise other people, the better able you will be to get exactly what you want. Being unegotistical and non-narcissistic is an excellent strategy for serving your selfish needs.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): “To go wrong in one’s own way is better than to go right in someone else’s,” says a character in Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s novel Crime and Punishment. I don’t agree with that idea 100 percent of the time. Sometimes our wrong ideas are so delusional that we’re better off getting interrupted and redirected by the wiser insights of others. But for the near future, Virgo, I recommend Dostoyevsky’s prescription for your use. One of your key principles will be to brandish your unique perspectives. Even if they’re not entirely right and reasonable, they will lead you to what you need to learn next.

total success if you do, but I promise that your chance to make progress will be higher than usual. Cosmic tendencies are leaning in the direction of you getting richer quicker, and if you collaborate with those tendencies, financial magic could materialize.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19): “It’s a terrible thing to wait until you’re ready,” proclaims actor Hugh Laurie. He goes even further: “No one is ever ready to do anything.

There is almost no such thing as ready.” His counsel is too extreme for my tastes. I believe that proper preparation is often essential.

We’ve got to get educated about the challenges we want to take on. We need to develop at least some skills to help us master our beloved goals.

On the other hand, it’s impossible to ever be perfectly prepared and educated and skilled. If you postpone your quantum leaps of faith until every contingency has been accounted for, you’ll never leap. Right now, Capricorn, Laurie’s view is good advice.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): “I love

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18):

kissing,” testifies singer-songwriter Sufjan Stevens. “If I could kiss all day, I would. I can’t stop thinking about kissing. I like kissing more than sex because there’s no end to it. You can kiss forever. You can kiss yourself into oblivion.

You can kiss all over the body. You can kiss yourself to sleep.” I invite you to temporarily adopt this expansive obsession, Libra. The astrological omens suggest that you need more sweet slippery sensual tender interaction than usual. Why? Because it will unleash sweet slippery sensual tender emotions and sweet slippery sensual tender thoughts, all of which will awaken a surge of dormant creativity.

Which you also need very much.

Fate has transformed a part of your life that you didn’t feel ready to have transformed. I won’t offer my condolences, though, because I’ve

guessed a secret that you don’t know about yet.

The mythic fact, as I see it, is that whatever you imagine you have had to let go of will ultimately come back to you in a revised and revivified form — maybe sooner than you think. Endings and beginnings are weaving their mysteries together in unforeseen ways. Be receptive to enigmatic surprises.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20): Good news: Your eagerness to think big is one of your superpowers. Bad news: It’s also one of your liabilities. Although it enables you to see how everything fits together, it may cause you to overlook details about what’s undermining you. Good news: Your capacity for intense empathy is a healing balm for both others and yourself. At least potentially, it means you can be a genius of intimacy. Bad news: Your intense empathy can make you fall prey to the emotional manipulation of people with whom you empathize. Good news: Your willingness to explore darkness is what makes your intelligence so profound. Bad news: But that’s also why you have to wrestle so fiercely with fear. Good news: In the next four weeks, the positive aspects of all the above qualities will be ascendant.

THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21): “Everything has been said before,” said French author André Gide, “but since nobody listens we have to keep going back and beginning all over again.” I am happy to inform you that you’re about to be temporarily exempt from this cynical formulation. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you will be able to drive home certain points that you have been trying to make over and over again for quite a while. The people who most need to hear them will finally be able to register your meaning. (P.S. This breakthrough will generate optimal results if you don’t gloat. Be grateful and understated.)

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21): Do you want more money, Sagittarius? Are there treasures you wish you could have, but you can’t afford them? Do any exciting experiences and life-enhancing adventures remain off-limits because of limited resources? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, now would be an excellent time to formulate plans and take action to gather increased wealth. I don’t guarantee

sacurrent.com • January 13—19, 2016 • CURRENT 57

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You may qualify for studies that will evaluate how a probiotic (good bacteria) and food composition affect the metabolism.

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58 CURRENT • January 13—19, 2016 • sacurrent.com

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