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SAN ANTONIO MUSEUM of ART 200 West Jones Avenue | San Antonio, Texas 78215 | 210.978.8100 | samuseum.org Liu Wei, Liberation No.1 (detail), 2013, oil on canvas, triptych: overall 118 1/8 x 212 5/8 in. (300 x 540 cm), Courtesy of Rubell Family Collection, Miami, Photography by Chi Lam Li Shurui, I am not ready…, 2013, acrylic on canvas, 98 x 98 in. (250 x 250 cm), Courtesy of Rubell Family Collection, Miami, Photography by Chi Lam This exhibition is generously supported by the Koehler Foundation, Bank of America, N.A.,Trustee, and the E. Rhodes and Leona B. Carpenter Foundation.

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CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MEJIA BALLET INTERNATIONAL PAUL MEJIA, ARTISTIC DIRECTOR San Antonio Metropolitan Ballet Susan Connally, Artistic Director

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 9

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CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

IN THIS

FIRST WORDS

1

On “NEISD to Discuss Changing Lee High School’s Name During Monday Meeting” // Miguel Maltos Gonzales: Although I can’t agree with Lee’s ideals, or with his mission. I can acknowledge Lee is a big part of southern history. After all there is far more to southern history than what the privileged put in books, and enforce their view of our culture. [sic] On “16 Memes That Perfectly Describe Our Complex Relationship With Tamales” // George Hooper: I have three empty husks before me as I read this. I am both amused and fat.

On “San Antonio’s Made Strides in Bike Infrastructure, but It Needs Leaps” // Jesus Martinez: I’ve been to the Siclovia events and know for a fact that San Antonians love riding their bicycles around the city. It is so infuriating that the city has no regard for a healthier, more eco-friendly mode of transportation. Humiliating for a city so recognized world-wide. [sic] On “An Out-of-Shape Reporter Goes to the Gym” // Matt Sevier: An atheist, a vegan, and a crossfitter walk into a bar. I only know because they told everyone within two minutes.

• Send your thoughts, comments or kudos to letters@sacurrent.com

ISSUE Issue 15_49 /// December 9 – 15, 2015

12

Newsmonger Bonkers climate change denier, SA Zoo sued and Texas’ desperate stalling tactics

37

SCREENS

CALENDAR

Our top picks for the week

30

ARTS + CULTURE

Discovering Experience Exploring and experiencing acclaimed art in “Immersed” Artist on Artist Gary Sweeney chats with former nun Michelle Belto

40

FOOD

47

NIGHTLIFE

Battle Cry Spike Lee’s new joint Chi-Raq preaches peace or no piece

Down to Business Tiny price, big payoff with these lunches

Keeping Tabs Milky throwbacks are in this winter

Universal Appeal Intergalactic Nemesis provides a sneak peek into the serial

Culinary Calendar 6 ways to get your drink/grub on this week

Seasonal Favorite This cocoa will warm you up right quick

Flavor File Stefan Bowers is manning lunch at Rebelle

MUSIC

Swinged Out Jazz trumpeter Christian Scott discusses his hatred of jazz trumpet ‘You Called Me on the Phone Last Night’ A chat with experimental musician and performance artist Gary Wilson

18

22

Project Censored!

Stories mainstream media left behind

53

41

NEWS

31

Good Vibrations The making of Deer Vibes’ debut LP Music Calendar What to see and hear this week

63

ETC.

Savage Love Jonesin’ Crossword Freewill Astrology This Modern World

ON THE

COVER From fracking to water privatization to deaths at the hands of police — Project Censored takes on the stories left untold by mainstream media.

Illustration by Jeremiah Teutsch Art direction by Rick Fisher and Sarah Flood-Baumann

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 11

NEWS

Species Act. The lawsuit follows calls by North Side City Councilman Joe Krier and a San Antonio Express-News editorial calling on the zoo to enter mediation with animalrights groups who want to move Lucky — they’ll pay for it — to an elephant refuge in Tennessee.

According to ALDF, the San Antonio Zoo declined to participate in mediation three times.

The zoo has accused the groups of spreading misinformation and claim the elephant is too old for such a huge move, which could possibly kill the quadruped.

In its lawsuit, the ALDF disputes the zoo’s assertion that Lucky is too old and accuse it of violating the Endangered Species Act by confining the elephant in isolation (Boo, its last companion was euthanized in 2013 for being overly aggressive); by not providing adequate shelter; and for leaving damaging substrate on the exhibit floor, which injures Lucky both physically and psychologically.

•

The Animal League Defense Fund alleges the San Antonio Zoo is violating the federal Endangered Species Act.

NEWSMONGER Climate Change Craziness // Lucky the Elephant // Texas’ Stalling Tactics Climate Change Craziness Has San Antonio Republican Congressman Lamar Smith gone bonkers?

Lately, he’s been giving the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) the Hillary Clinton-privateemail treatment. He tried to get NOAA researchers to turn over emails after the science organization published a globalwarming study in a peer-reviewed journal that poked holes in arguments made by climate change skeptics.

Smith serves as chairman for the House Comittee on Science, Space, and Technology, which (frighteningly) has jurisdiction over NASA, the Environmental Protection Agency, the National Science Foundation and more.

His standoff with NOAA is because Smith accuses NOAA scientists of cherry-picking data. Smith backed off of his email subpoena after important 12

MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN

science organizations that represent a ton of researchers sent him a letter explaining that he is threatening academic freedom, The Washington Post reported. Smith, however, believes — despite a peer review in a prominent journal — that scientists are altering data to support the president’s climate policy.

The congressman made the allegations in an opinion piece in The Washington Times published on November 26.

Smith, however, who by the way was a lawyer before entering politics in the late ’70s, not a scientist, is likely to continue harassing scientists. While he backed off email correspondence between federal scientists, he is still seeking documents and memos related to the study.

Let’s Talk About Lucky An Asian elephant named Lucky, who has lived at the San Antonio Zoo for more than 50 years, is the subject of controversy.

The Animal League Defense Fund (ALDF) sued the zoo last week — on behalf of One World Conservation, a nonprofit animal rights advocacy group — alleging that the zoo’s method of housing Lucky violates the federal Endangered

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

Politics of Immigration Texas Solicitor General Scott Keller thought he could kill two of President Barack Obama’s 2014 executive actions that would pave the way for almost 5 million undocumented immigrants to receive deportation relief by stalling.

Calling it a procedural game of chess, the Texas Tribune reported in late November that Keller, who represents Texas in the lawsuit brought by a coalition of 26 states, filed a 30-day extension to respond to the Department of Justice’s appeal of a lower court ruling that agreed with the coalition — effectively knocking the case off the docket until June 2017, when Obama is no longer president. The gamble is that a Republican will win the White House and do away with the executive actions altogether. The Supreme Court, however, declined to play politics and gave the state eight days to respond to the appeal.

Danny Cendejas, the Texas Organizing Project’s immigration campaign field director, applauded the decision.

“The states fighting temporary relief for undocumented mothers, fathers and young people are clearly trying to delay the case as long as they can with the hope that a new president will undo President Obama’s executive orders,” Cendejas said in a statement. mreagan@sacurrent.com

BEXAR-O-METER Checking the temperature of events in Bexar County and beyond

ZONA CULTURAL San Anto adds second cultural district at Market Square

LYFT RETURNS Ride-booking company kicks off pilot program

DINOSAURS! The Witte Museum to get permanent gallery of terrible lizards

WE LOVE TACOS SA’s version of popular Austin street art

CHILLY WEATHER Winter is in the air

SUING SYRIANS Indicted AG Ken Paxton sues to keep refugees out of Dallas

SAN BERNARDINO TRAGEDY Yet another American mass shooting

T:10.18 in B:10.18 in

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 13

S:9.68 in

© 2015 Goose Island Beer Company, Chicago, IL. Enjoy responsibly.

Great American Beer Festival® Awards (Category: English Style India Pale Ale): 2012 Gold (India Pale Ale), 2009 Silver (IPA), 2007 Silver (India Pale Ale), 2004 Silver (Goose Island India Pale Ale), 2001 Bronze (India Pale Ale), 2000 Gold (Goose Island IPA).

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NEWS

•

Tim Redmond, a long-time editor of the San Francisco Bay Guardian, is the founding member of the San Francisco Progressive Media Center and editor of that nonprofit organization’s publication 48 Hills.

10 Big Stories News Media Ignored TIM REDMOND

When Sonoma State University professor Carl Jensen started looking into the new media’s practice of self-censorship in 1976, the Internet was only a dream and most computers were still big mainframes with whirling tape reels and vacuum tubes.

He put out an annual list of the 10 biggest stories that the mainstream media ignored, arguing that it was a failure of the corporate press to pursue and promote these stories that represented censorship — not by the government — but by the media itself.

“My definition starts with the other end, with the failure of information to reach people,” he wrote. “For the purposes of this project, censorship is defined as the suppression of information, whether purposeful or not, by any method — including bias, omission, underreporting, or self-censorship, which prevents the public from fully knowing what is happening in the world.”

Jensen died in April 2015, but his project was inherited 14

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

and carried on by Sonoma State sociology professor Peter Phillips and Mickey Huff.

Half of Global Wealth Owned by the 1 Percent

We hear plenty of talk about the wealth and power of the top 1 percent of people in the United States, but the global wealth gap is, if anything, even worse. And it has profound human consequences.

Oxfam International, which has been working for decades to fight global poverty, released a January 2015 report showing that, if current trends continue, the wealthiest 1 percent, by the end of this year, will control more wealth than everyone else in the world put together.

Another stunning fact: The wealth of 85 of the richest people in the world combined is equal to the wealth of half the world’s poor combined.

The mainstream news media coverage of the report

and the associated issues was spotty at best. A few corporate television networks, including CNN, CBS, MSNBC, ABC, FOX and C-SPAN covered Oxfam’s January report, according to the TV News Archive. CNN had the most coverage with about seven broadcast segments from January 19 to 25, 2015. However, these stories aired between 2 and 3 a.m., far from primetime.

Oil Industry Illegally Dumps Fracking Wastewater

Fracking, which involves pumping high-pressure water and chemicals into rock formations to free up oil and natural gas, has been a huge issue nationwide. But there’s been little discussion of one of the side effects: the contamination of aquifers.

The Center for Biological Diversity reported in 2014 that oil companies had dumped almost 3 billion gallons of fracking wastewater into California’s underground

NEWS

water supply. Since the companies refuse to say what chemicals they use in the process, nobody knows exactly what the level of contamination is. But wells that supply drinking water near where the fracking waste was dumped tested high in arsenic, thallium and nitrates.

In May 2015, the Los Angeles Times ran a front-page feature on Central Valley crops irrigated with treated oil field water; however, the Los Angeles Times report made no mention of the Center for Biological Diversity’s findings regarding fracking wastewater contamination.

89 Percent of Pakistani Drone Victims Not Identifiable as Militants

The United States sends drone aircraft into combat on a regular basis, particularly in Pakistan. The Obama administration says the drones fire missiles only when there is clear evidence that the targets are Al Qaeda bases. Secretary of State John Kerry insists that, “the only people we fire a drone at are confirmed terrorist targets at the highest levels.”

But the Bureau of Investigative Journalism, which keeps track of all the strikes, reported that only 4 percent of those killed by drones were Al Qaeda members and only 11 percent were confirmed militants of any sort.

That means 89 percent of the 2,464 people killed by U.S. drones could not be identified as terrorists.

In fact, 30 percent of the dead could not be identified at all.

The New York Times has covered the fact that, as one story noted, “most individuals killed are not on a kill list, and the government does not know their names.”

Popular Resistance to Corporate Water Grabbing

For decades, private companies have been trying to take over and control water supplies, particularly in the developing world. Now, as journalist Ellen Brown reported in March 2015, corporate water barons, including Goldman Sachs, JPMorgan Chase, Citigroup, the Carlyle Group and other investment firms “are purchasing water rights from around the world at an unprecedented pace.”

However, over the past 15 years, more than 180 communities have fought back and re-municipalized their water systems. “From Spain to Buenos Aires, Cochabamba to Kazakhstan, Berlin to Malaysia, water privatization is being aggressively rejected,” Victoria Collier reported in CounterPunch.

Meanwhile, in the United States, some cities — in what may be a move toward privatization — are radically raising water rates and cutting off service to lowincome communities.

The mainstream media response to the privatization of water has been largely silence.

Fukushima Nuclear Disaster Deepens

More than four years after a tsunami destroyed Japan’s Fukushima nuclear plant, causing one of the worst nuclear accidents in human history, radiation from the plant continues to leak into the ocean.

But the story has largely disappeared from the news.

We’re talking large amounts of highly contaminated

water getting dumped into the ocean. The plant’s owner, Tokyo Electric Power Company, “admitted that the facility is releasing a whopping 150 billion becquerels of tritium and 7 billion becquerels of cesium- and strontiumcontaminated water into the ocean every day.” The potential for long-term problems all over the world is huge — and the situation hasn’t been contained.

Fear of Government Spying Is Chilling Writers’ Freedom of Expression

Writers in Western liberal democracies may not face the type of censorship seen in some parts of the world, but their fear of government surveillance is still causing many to think twice about what they can say.

A PEN America survey showed that “34 percent of writers in liberal democracies reported some degree of self-censorship (compared with 61 percent of writers living in authoritarian countries, and 44 percent in semidemocratic countries). Almost 60 percent of the writers from Western Europe, the United States … indicated that U.S. credibility ‘has been significantly damaged for the long term’ by revelations of the U.S. government surveillance programs.”

Who Dies at the Hands of Police — and How Often

High-profile police killings, particularly of AfricanAmerican men, have made big news over the past few years. But there’s been much less attention paid to the overall numbers — and to the difference between how many people are shot by cops in the United States compared to other countries.

In the January 2015 edition of Liberation, Richard Becker, relying on public records, concluded that the rate of U.S. police killing was 100 times that of England, 40 times that of Germany and 20 times the rate in Canada.

In June 2015, a team of reporters from the Guardian concluded that 102 unarmed people were killed by U.S. police in the first five months of that year — twice the rate reported by the government.

Furthermore, the Guardian wrote, “black Americans are more than twice as likely to be unarmed when killed during encounters with police as white people.” The paper concluded that, “Thirty-two percent of black people killed by police in 2015 were unarmed, as were 25 percent of Hispanic and Latino people, compared with 15 percent of white people killed.”

And as far as accountability goes, the Washington Post noted that in 385 cases of police killings, only three officers faced charges.

Millions in Poverty Get Less Media Coverage than Billionaires Do

The news media in the United States doesn’t like to talk about poverty, but they love to report on the lives and glory of the super-rich.

The advocacy group, Fairness and Accuracy in Reporting, analyzed the three major television news networks and found that 482 billionaires got more attention than the 50 million people who live in poverty.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 21 ►

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 15

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NEWS

GREG WEBB / IAEA

•As arctic ice melts because of global warming, more methane is being released into the atmosphere.

THE RUNNERS-UP: -Pesticide manufacturers spend millions on PR response to declining bee populations -USDA ignores popular critiques of new pesticideresistant genetically modified crops -Pentagon and NATO encircle Russia and China -Global forced displacement tops 50 million -Big sugar borrowing tactics from big tobacco -U.S. military sexual assault of Colombian children -Media “whitewash” Senate’s CIA torture report -ICREACH: the NSA’s secret search engine -“Most comprehensive” assessment yet warns against geoengineering risks -FBI seeks backdoors in new communications technology -The new Amazon of the north: Canadian deforestation -Global killing of environmentalists rises drastically -Unprocessed rape kits -NSA’s AURORAGOLD Program hacks cell phones around world -Greenland’s meltwater contributes to rising sea levels

◄ CONTINUED FROM PAGE 15

This shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone who follows the mainstream media, or pays much attention to the world of social media and the blogosphere. The top rung of society gets vast amounts of attention, for good and for ill — but the huge numbers of people who are homeless, hungry and often lacking in hope just aren’t news.

The FAIR study revealed that between January 2013 and February 2014, a scant average of just 2.7 seconds per 22-minute episode covered poverty, with just 23 news segments featuring the topic during the 14-month study.

Costa Rica Is Setting the Standard on Renewable Energy

Is it possible to meet a modern nation’s energy needs without any fossil-fuel consumption? Yes. Costa Rica has been doing it.

To be fair, that country’s main industries — tourism 18

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

and agriculture — are not energy-intensive, and heavy rainfall in the first part of the year made it possible for the country to rely heavily on its hydropower resources.

But even in normal years, Costa Rica generates 90 percent of its energy without burning any fossil fuels.

The transition to 100 percent renewables will be harder for larger countries — but as the limited reporting on Costa Rica notes, it’s possible to take large steps in that direction.

Methane and Arctic Warming’s Global Impacts

We all know that carbon emissions from the burning of fossil fuels are a huge threat to climate stability. But there’s another giant threat out there that hasn’t made much news.

The arctic ice sheets, which are rapidly melting in some areas, contain massive amounts of methane — a greenhouse gas that’s way worse than carbon dioxide.

And, as the ice recedes, that methane is getting released

into the atmosphere.

Dahr Jamail, writing in Truthout, notes that all of our predictions about the pace of global warming and its impacts might have to be re-evaluated in the wake of revelations about methane releases.

“A 2013 study, published in Nature, reported that a 50-gigaton ‘burp’ of methane is ‘highly possible at any time.’” As Jamail clarified, “That would be the equivalent of at least 1,000 gigatons of carbon dioxide,” noting that, since 1850, humans have released a total of about 1,475 gigatons in carbon dioxide. A massive, sudden change in methane levels could, in turn, lead to temperature increases of four to six degrees Celsius in just one or two decades — a rapid rate of climate change to which human agriculture, and ecosystems more generally, could not readily adapt.

A huge story? Apparently not. The major news media have written at length about the geopolitics of the arctic region, but there’s been very little mention of the methane monster.

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CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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CALENDAR

GETTY IMAGES

THU

!!!

10 There was a point not so long MUSIC

ago when it seemed dance-punk might break the skin of the mainstream and take over the airwaves. Both an anomaly and a survivor of that millennial craze, New York via California outfit !!! (commonly pronounced “Chk Chk Chk”) has carved its own niche with a party-minded hybrid informed by funk, disco and an absurdist sense of humor and style (think Talking Heads, LCD Soundsystem, Hot Chip). Arguably best known for the 2003 indie-house epic “Me and Giuliani Down by the School Yard (A True Story),” !!! lands at Paper Tiger in support of their sixth studio album, As If. $15, 8pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com. — Erik Casarez

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THU

‘Extraordinary’

10 The latest offering from Susan ART

Heard’s Cinnabar, “Extraordinary” is a multi-artist exhibit with an eye for repurposing everyday objects.

Interpreted literally, the exhibit title is quite fitting: With familiar materials, participating artists created pieces that challenge conventions. Among the featured artists are Kevin Box (who creates metal sculptures reminiscent of folded paper), Ernesto Ibañez (who makes nails resemble animal fur), Javier Vanegas (who crafts copies of controversial paintings from sex-service adverts) and Dörte Weber (who sees urban landscapes with a weaver’s eye). Free, 6:30-9pm, Cinnabar, 1420 S. Alamo St. #147, (210) 557-6073, cinnabarart.com. — James Courtney

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

FRI

Spurs vs. Lakers

11 For better or worse, Spurs fans SPORTS

are familiar with the genius of Kobe Bryant’s game. During his prime with the Lakers, Bryant tormented Tim Duncan and company, often with Phil Jackson smiling smugly on the sideline.

Whether paired with Shaquille O’Neal or Andrew Bynum, some of Bryant’s best games came against the Spurs, often in the playoffs. Duncan triumphed in 2003, doing his part to help end that Lakers dynasty. In fitting fashion, Bryant’s impending exit effectively opens the door for San Antonio native Jordan Clarkson, one of the most talented young guards in the league. $105-$318, 8:30pm, AT&T Center, One AT&T Center Pkwy., (210) 4445000, attcenter.com. — M. Solis

FRI-TUE

11-15

OPEN Downtown Pop-Up Shops SPECIAL EVENT

Quickly establishing themselves as highlights on SA’s Yuletide calendar, the Center City Development Office’s OPEN: Downtown Pop-Up Shops return to activate underutilized storefronts on Houston and Travis streets. After kicking off Friday with a Progressive Opening Party and Gift Market soundtracked by Ghostpizza Empire (5-7pm Fri), the collab between property owners, businesses and artists continues daily through December 19, tempting browsers with everything from handcrafted soaps and chocolates to fresh flowers and plus-size apparel. Free, 11am7pm Fri-Tue, 140 E. Houston St. (Suite 40 & 41), 231 E. Houston St., 115 E. Travis St. (Suite 109), opensanantonio.com. — Bryan Rindfuss

CALENDAR

TODD V WOLFSON

SAT

Queer the Cheer

12 Devised by local artist/educator/ SPECIAL EVENT

musician Ernesto Olivo and a handful of collaborators from varied backgrounds, the SA Queer Collective is designed to “emphasize and promote” the diverse talents of the Alamo City’s LGBTQA community. Initiated in 2013, the collective’s inaugural Cheer the Queer attracted 200-plus shoppers with its winning mix of handmade wares, tamales and beer. For its third incarnation, the holiday market aims to create a “unique and safe space” to showcase LGBT, queer and ally artists, crafters, makers, musicians and performers. Free, (beer, wine and food available by donation), 4-11pm, Southwest Workers Union, 1416 E. Commerce St., facebook.com/ saqcollective. — BR

SAT

Wild Child

12 Active since 2010, Wild Child MUSIC

is a seven-piece indie-pop outfit from Austin, led by principal songwriters and vocalists Kelsey Wilson and Alexander Beggins. The young group writes expansive and endearingly catchy songs that become even more extravagantly effusive with the huge arrangements they receive, especially live: ukulele (played by Beggins), violin (played by Wilson), trumpet and cello complement more expected indie-rock instruments. The sugary sound of the music is tempered by often bitingly sarcastic lyrics and heady, jazzy passages that somehow work quite well in the context of pure pop. $15, 8pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com. — JC

SAT

‘La Permanent Virgen’

12 Although typically celebrated SPECIAL EVENT

with feasts and pilgrimages to Mexico’s Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe (where the Virgin Mary allegedly appeared to Juan Diego circa 1531), Our Lady of Guadalupe Day gets a quirky twist this year via Marisela Barrera’s “La Permanent Virgen.” Part scavenger hunt, part progressive exhibition and part selfie challenge (#SAvirgen), the concept uses the Chicana artist’s reverence for Mexico’s patron saint as a thread connecting diverse representations of la Virgen at 12 local sites — from Guadalupe Lumber and the Little Church of Miracles to Phantom Room and Ray’s Drive Inn. Free, times vary, for a complete list of locations, visit sacurrent.com/calendar.

— BR

SUN

13

Dead Kennedys Matinee Show MUSIC

Songwriting weirdo Jello Biafra has been out of the picture since the band’s 2001 revival, but Dead Kennedys still pack enough fury and nostalgia to sell out a Saturday night Korova gig and book an encore set the next day. A defining San Francisco hardcore outfit, Dead Kennedys tear through caterwauling guitar and a seething deadpan on staples like “Holiday in Cambodia” and “Kill the Poor.” Celebrating The Korova’s sixth anniversary, the venue couldn’t have picked a more perfect house band for the bash. Happy birthday, you droogs.

With Sniper 66, Ironhead Division, FatMD, Bent Gents. $20-$25, 3pm, The Korova, 107 E. Martin St., (210) 226-5070, thekorova.com. — Matt Stieb

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 23

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TUE

Billed as “the nerdiest convention you’ll ever attend,” Nerdtacular is a bit hard on itself. It would be far nerdier to attend, say, a conference on the economic trends of post-Civil War America. From where we are sitting, Nerdtacular, a two-day affair celebrating comics, games, toons, pop culture, vintage fashion, arts and crafts, just sounds like a whole lot of fun. There’s even a Christmas song karaoke contest, live music and photo ops with a Grinch Santa and/or a Darth Vader Claus. With over 100 vendors in participation, and spanning two full days, it also seems like a great time to snap up some one-of-a-kind presents for yourself and your favorite nerds. On Sunday, after a day or two at Nerdtacular, cap off your geeky weekend by staying in your Star Wars attire and heading on down to the Wookiee Walk, which departs from the Tower of the Americas at 6 p.m. What a time to be alive! Free, 10am-9pm Sat, noon-6pm Sun, Wonderland of The Americas, 4522 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 785-3500, wonderlandamericas.com. — James Courtney

Art

Art opening: “Butterfly Revival” Attorney-turned artist Lucy Peveto unveils a new series of paintings exploring how butterflies represent her own life experience and “the connection between creativity, emotion and spirituality.” Free, 6-8pm Wednesday; AnArte Gallery, 7959 Broadway, Suite 404, (210) 826-5674.

Art opening: “Every Second Saturday” Efrain Gutierrez Taller hosts a Second Saturday reception with artwork by Rudy Almanza and Death from a Brush, plus live music by Join or Die, Skeleton Creek, Chris Torres, Alexis Torres and Armando Martinez. Free, 7pm-midnight Saturday; Efrain Gutierrez Taller, 3403 S. Flores St., (240) 343-4563.

Art opening: “Small + Medium + Large” Artists Cindy Palmer, Laura Mijangos, Antonia Richardson, Missi Smith and Sandy Whitby present a selection of “small, medium and large works” at Mercury Projects. Free, 6-8pm Friday; Mercury Project, 538 Roosevelt Ave., (210) 478-9133.

Art opening: “Thirty-Two or 18 to 50” For his first solo exhibition, Cody Vance assembles paintings and drawings encompassing his teenage years, his time working as a military artist and medical illustrator, and his “delighted discovery of stone sculpture.” Free, 7-10pm Saturday; 3rd Space Art Gallery, 141 Cassiano St.

Art opening: “The Book Garden” At

first glance, the sculptural works of Long Bin-Chen appear to be carved in stone, but the New York-based Taiwanese artist

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manipulates printed materials (including phone books, newspapers and magazines) in curious arrangements inspired by cultural exchange and communication.

Free, 6-8pm Thursday; Central Library, 600 Soledad St., (210) 207-2500.

Closing reception: “Fall 2015 BFA Exhibition” UTSA’s department of art and art history presents wide-ranging works by 19 emerging artists addressing themes ranging from “social and cultural critique to investigations that are challenging and exquisite explorations in creative form and image.” Free, 2-4pm Wednesday; UTSA Art Gallery-Main Campus, One UTSA Circle, (210) 458-4391.

Film

Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny

Remember when you were a kid and you first started to question the Santa Claus mythos: whether it was really plausible that one man could deliver all those toys in one night, or live year-round at the North Pole, or whether, if Santa’s sleigh got stuck in the sand on a Florida beach and he were abandoned by his flying reindeer, he could actually summon a magical fire engine piloted by the Ice Cream Bunny to help him out? Relive that insane holiday tradition shared by only you and filmmaker R. Winer in the only appropriate way — accompanied by the live sarcastic commentary of the RiffTrax crew (featuring who else but former members of the Mystery Science Theater 3000 ensemble), who’ll be adding an additional layer of commentary on top of that already offered in the film by Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer.

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

The Book of Mormon

ask Mountain Dew or any number of 15 Just energy drink providers and they’ll tell you

that South Park’s demographic is one that you want on your team. So when Trey Parker and Matt Stone mobilized their audience to leave the basement and hit the theater for The Book of Mormon, it was almost predetermined that the musical would break sales records. But it was a surprise when the deliciously offensive production swept the critical establishment. After premiering on Broadway in 2011, The Book of Mormon won nine Tonys, including Best Musical, Best Book of a Musical and Best Original Score. (Thankfully, Parker and Stone didn’t drop acid and wear evening gowns to the awards ceremony, as they did at the 1999 Oscars.) Teaming with composer Robert Lopez (the EGOT winner responsible for the Frozen soundtrack), Stone and Parker penned a story about two Mormon missionaries trying to share Joseph Smith’s teachings in Uganda.

Elder Kevin Price (Billy Harrigan Tighe) dreams of a deployment in Orlando, while Elder Cunningham (A.J. Holmes) improvises his teaching with Star Wars dogma, having never read Smith’s scriptures. $49-$164, 7:30pm, Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-5700, majesticempire.com. Through December 20. — Matt Stieb (Did we mention this film is insane?) Visit fathomevents.com for a complete list of participating theaters. $12.50, 7:30pm Tuesday; Palladium Imax, 17703 I-10 W., (210) 496-2221.

Theater

A Christmas Carol The Playhouse presents

the world premiere of Tony Ciaravino and Tim Hedgepeth’s theatrical adaptation of Charles Dickens’ 19th-century tale surrounding the transformation of bitter, old miser Ebenezer Scrooge. $12-$30, 8pm Thursday-Saturday, 3pm Sunday; The Playhouse, 800 W. Ashby Pl., (210) 733-7258.

Las Nuevas Tamaleras For playwright Alicia

Mena, who penned this holiday comedy in 1993, Las Nuevas Tamaleras acts as a window for audiences to see themselves in the ritual of tamaladas. Mena and several of the original cast members will reprise roles they originated in the early ’90s. As Doña Mercedes, Mena plays a no-nonsense master tamalera who coaches a novice along with the spirit of Doña Juanita (played by veteran actor Ruby Nelda Perez) — hilarity ensues. $12-$25, 8pm FridaySaturday, 3pm Sunday; Guadalupe Theater, 1301 Guadalupe St., (210) 271-1011.

Peter Pan Following the boy who would

not grow up and the children he lures to Neverland, Peter Pan brings high-flying antics and adventure to the Woodlawn.

Based on J.M. Barrie’s classic tale, made famous by the Walt Disney cartoon, and later mocked across Twitter thanks to NBC’s live version, the story’s undergone facelifts over the decades, but one thing remains the same: Peter must fly. Director

Greg Hinojosa partners with ZFX Flying Effects Equipment to bring the magic of flight to Peter (Carlye Gossen) and his ensemble of lost boys, pirates, Indians and Darlings. $17-$26, 8pm Friday-Saturday, 3pm Sunday; 1920 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 267-8388.

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

Counted among the worst films of all time, Santa Claus Conquers the Martians could have slipped into obscurity following its 1964 release had it not been for Mystery Science Theater 3000. After spoofing the film in an episode, the ’90s-era favorite successfully resuscitated the cautionary tale of what happens when Martians decide to kidnap Santa, thus inspiring countless decades of Martian mongers to come. The Overtime Theater explores this cult oddity in a new collection of shorts filled with green men, cardboard robots, half-Martian reindeer and a Santa dance-off. $10-$14, 8pm Friday-Saturday; The Overtime Theater, 1203 Camden St., (210) 557-7562.

The Santaland Diaries Bart Roush directs the Classic Theatre’s production of this cult classic based on the true chronicles of NPR comic genius David Sedaris’ bizarre experiences portraying Crumpet the Elf in Macy’s Santaland display.

The play contains adult content and is recommended for mature elves only. $20, 8pm Friday-Saturday, 3pm Sunday; Classic Theatre of San Antonio, 1924 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 589-8450.

Words

David M. Parsons Austin native David M.

Parsons, 2011 Texas State Poet Laureate,

JOHAN PERSSON

12-13

Nerdtacular

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CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

CALENDAR

reads from Reaching For Longer Water, a new anthology collecting the most compelling poems from his four previous collections. Free, 3-5pm Tuesday; The Twig Book Shop, 306 Pearl Pkwy., Suite 106, (210) 826-6411.

Naomi Shihab Nye Award-winning

local poet, author and editor Naomi Shihab Nye celebrates the release of her new Wings Press book devoted to her cherished work “Famous,” a charmingly ironic poem that has loaned itself to everything from graduation cards and speeches to creative writing exercises and standardized tests. Free, 4-7pm Tuesday; Kathleen Sommers Boutique, 2417 N. Main Ave., (210) 732-8437.

Comedy

Rod Man A master of spinning humor

out of everyday situations, Los Angelesbased actor, writer and stand-up Rod Man (born Rod Thompson) recently won season eight of NBC’s Last Comic Standing and is currently developing a multi-camera comedy series produced

by Wanda Sykes and Kenny Smith. $22.50, 8pm & 10:15pm Friday-Saturday, 8pm Sunday; Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 541-8805.

Special Events

5 Points Local Holiday Market

Benefiting the Martinez Street Women’s Center, this hyper-local holiday market beckons to shoppers with an array of unique and handcrafted gifts, sweet and savory fare, and musical performances

by Sioux and Fox and Ellen and the Degenerates. Free, noon-5pm Saturday; 5 Points Local, 1017 N. Flores St.

“A Cat’s Meow Christmas” Villa Finale

hosts a roaring ‘20s-themed celebration with a holiday concert (featuring the San Antonio Brass Orchestra), seasonal beverages and a sampling of holiday desserts recreated from vintage recipes. $15, 5:30pm Saturday; Villa Finale, 401 King William St., (210) 223-9800.

On view through January 10

An Army Band Holiday Special “Fort

Sam’s Own” 323rd Army Band rings in the season with a “heartwarming, fun-filled, evening of music.” Free, 6-8pm Saturday; Laurie Auditorium, Trinity University, One Trinity Pl., (210) 999-7011.

Chanukah Celebration and Menorah Lighting The Pearl partners with Young

& Jewish San Antonio for this inaugural lighting celebration with traditional kosher food from Green Vegetarian Cuisine and live music by Tera Ferna and Brent Michael Woods. Free, 6-9:30pm Wednesday; Pearl Stable, 312 Pearl Pkwy., (210) 212-7260.

Rock & Brews Grand Opening Paul

Stanley and Gene Simmons of KISS land in SA to celebrate the grand opening of their indoor/outdoor dining and entertainment concept Rock & Brews. In addition to singing the National Anthem before the San Antonio Spurs take on the Los Angeles Lakers, Stanley will greet fans at Rock & Brews before the game. Prices vary, game at 8:30pm Friday; AT&T Center, One AT&T Center Pkwy., (210) 444-5000.

Selena Lotería Southwest Workers Union

hosts a night promising to “blend Selena with Lotería through the talents of local artists.” While browsing for unique wares from the likes of VeryThat, Reckless Moon and Gutter Bunny Designs, guests can take in live music by local acts, including Xy!o, Pink Leche and Calico Club. $3, 7-11pm Friday; Southwest Workers Union, 1416 E. Commerce St., (210) 299-2666.

“Ten Little Idioms” Co-led by alto

saxophonist Richard Oppenheim and multi-instrumentalist/ethnomusicologist Katchie Cartwright, the Cartwright/ Oppenheim Quintet performs a multigenre world-jazz repertoire encompassing 10 distinct musical idioms (Brazilian bossa and choro, Yiddish and French swing and tango, Latin American chacha and bolero, East European klezmer, and Sephardic romanza) in celebration of Bihl Haus Arts’ 10th anniversary.

Free, 2pm Sunday; Bill Haus Arts, 2803 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 383-9723.

Talks Plus

Lalo Alcaraz Creator of Pocho magazine

and La Cucaracha (the first nationally syndicated, politically themed Latino daily comic strip), controversial cartoonist Lalo Alcaraz visits the Guadalupe to deliver a “comic plática” (via a multimedia slideshow on La Cucaracha) and sign calendars and prints. Free, 7pm Monday; Guadalupe Theater, 1301 Guadalupe St., (210) 271-3151.

McNay Art Museum San Antonio, Texas 6000 North New Braunfels San Antonio, Texas 78209-0069 mcnayart.org

EXHIBITION ORGANIZED BY THE SEATTLE ART MUSEUM AND THE MUSEO NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. THIS EXHIBITION IS SUPPORTED BY AN INDEMNITY FROM THE FEDERAL COUNCIL ON THE ARTS AND THE HUMANITIES. JOAN MIRÓ, FIGURE AND BIRD, 1968. LOST-WAX CASTING, PATINATED BRONZE. NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. © SUCCESSIÓ MIRÓ / ARTISTS RIGHTS SOCIETY (ARS), NEW YORK / ADAGP, PARIS 2015.

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ARTS + CULTURE

DISCOVERING EXPERIENCE

‘Immersed’ explores depths of Linda Pace’s vision DAN R. GODDARD

“Immersed” at the Linda Pace Foundation’s SPACE gallery provides a glimpse of what we can expect to see inside the planned $16 million Ruby City designed

by British architect David Adjaye, scheduled to open in 2018 to celebrate San Antonio’s 300th birthday. Curator Annette DiMeo Carlozzi, recently retired from the Blanton Museum of Art at the University of Texas at Austin, has taken a loose, inspirational approach to exploring “new resonances” in more than 20 works in various media by 17 internationally acclaimed artists.

Carlozzi has served as a curatorial panelist, writer and board advisor to Artpace. She knew Pace well and conceived “Immersed” as a tribute to the pioneering spirit and generosity of the Artpace founder. Drawing from the foundation’s growing collection of more than 800 paintings, sculptures, installations and video works, Carlozzi said her selections are intended to “evoke the cool heat of intense engagement, riffing in unexpected ways on the immersive experiences of artmaking and art-viewing.”

Freed from institutional restraints and breaking with the typical didactic, linear, rigid installations of most museum shows, Carlozzi has been more freewheeling in how the pieces are displayed. Along with the usual staid list of materials, she’s added lyrical observations and existential questions to the wall labels. And while several world-famous male artists are included, female artists make some of the strongest statements.

For example, Anne Chu’s View of a Gorge (1999) is a miniature river gorge made with dye and oil on wood. The two large, towering pieces look like sections of canyon plucked from Big Bend 30

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

National Park and shrunk to a human scale. Setting them slightly apart provides the illusion of a river flowing between the two cliff walls. On the wall label, Carlozzi notes: “Washes of color absorbed by soft, carved wood. Majestic mountains perched on steel – no purples or greens – just a dry sliver of space between. Gorge, gorgeous: seduced there, would we ever emerge?”

Designed more to spark the viewer’s imagination than merely educate, Carlozzi’s provocative comments provide a more interactive way of engaging with the artwork.

Offering hope for the millennial generation, Miwa Yanagi’s Yuka (2000) is fun and inspiring. The large-scale photograph shows an older woman with bright red dyed hair throwing back her head and laughing wildly as she rides in a motorcycle’s sidecar roaring across the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. For her My

ARTS + CULTURE

mori for Pace featuring a yellow flower with a smiley face.

Grandmothers series, the Japanese artist interviewed The small scale contrasts dramatically with the digitally young women between the ages of 14 and 20 and asked printed 40-foot-long wall piece on traditional Japanese them to imagine what their life would be like in 50 years. paper she created during her 2006 residency at Artpace.

Yanagi then worked with models, makeup, props and By writing her name obsessively in her monoprints on software to create the young women’s vision of the future. yellow paper, is British artist Tracey Emin commenting on In her zesty prediction, Yuka imagined in her 70s she how women should put themselves first, or is it evidence would be living on the West Coast with her “playboy” of the single-minded ambition that drove her from being lover. Her lust for life is exhilarating. the bad girl of the Young British Artists in the 1980s to Teresita Fernández, who designed the adjacent becoming a respected member of the Royal Academy CHRISpark, splashes a pink-and-black aurora of Arts? Eccentrically, Carlozzi placed acclaimed British borealis across the sky in her dramatic Night Writing sculptor Antony Gormley’s small drawing, Being (1995), (Tristan and Isolde) (2011). But complicating the high on the wall, but it’s an appropriate spot for the message, tactile Braille writing is etched in the handhaunting minimalist landscape that appears to be a lonely dyed and formed paper pulp she used as a canvas. plain on the moon.

Rather than providing an easy-to-read image, Perhaps the best made-in-San Antonio but not Fernández employed the musical techniques Immersed at Artpace work is Terry Adkins’ Bouquet (2000), of Richard Wagner’s mid-19th-century opera Free a sunflower-like mandala made with pants-leg – chromaticism, tonality, orchestral color and Noon-5pm Wed-Sat stencils the Brooklyn- and Philadelphia-based artist harmonic suspension – to make her intricately Through Feb. 27 SPACE scavenged during his month-long Finesilver Gallery crafted work more tantalizing and mysterious.

111 Camp St. residency in 2000. Working in the Finesilver Carlozzi notes: “She leaves no choice but to (210) 227-8400 stop asking logical questions (What is this lindapacefoundation.org Building, formerly a uniform-manufacturing business, Adkins created dozens of sculptures out image? How does it operate?); we can only of the factory’s discarded materials while listening to Robert submit to the work’s effect.”

Johnson-inspired blues on his boombox.

Cinematic conceptualism might be a good way to “Marching in (uniform) step, the thick sheets’ repetitive describe these large-scale works that “immerse” viewers arrangement suggests the drudgery of factory work,” in the artist’s richly imagined universe. Surasi Kusolwong Carlozzi notes. “And the measured spin of Bouquet’s adds three-dimensional plastic fruit to her vividly colored improbably gorgeous palette – muted patinas, vaguely photograph of an Asian river market in Small Is Beautiful flesh-toned – evokes the steady rhythms of the blues.”

(Gold Floating Market) (2002). Catherine Opie’s fog“Immersed” reflects the wide-ranging taste of Pace, bound photograph is part of a suite that captures a line of but the Foundation continues to add works, recently surfers waiting for a wave on a gray, wintry day. announcing three significant 2015 acquisitions, including Poignantly, Chiho Aoshima created a Japanese Isaac Julien’s three-screen film installation, Playtime (2014). magna-influenced, mixed-media memento The Foundation also acquired works by two important San Antonio artists. Alejandro Diaz’s Muebles — life-size, cast-resin, migrant-worker figures posed as furniture — were shown last summer at SPACE. Jesse Amado debuted his felt sculptures and wall hangings in “30 Day Rx” last spring at Ruiz-Healy Art. The show marked his return to art making after a five-year battle with cancer, which, ironically, he first learned about while working on Days, his lush curtain of crystal teardrops at the Central Library made in commemoration of Pace.

•

From top: Miwa Yanagi, Yuka; Surasi Kusolwong, Small is Beautiful (Gold Floating Market); Tracey Emin, Tracey Tracey Tracey; Teresita Fernández, Night Writing (Tristan and Isolde)

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 31

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ARTS + CULTURE

ARTIST ON ARTIST

Gary Sweeney Interviews Michelle Belto Michelle Belto is a master in the ancient (and yet current) art of encaustic, which involves heated beeswax to which textures and pigments are added. Her family moved to San Antonio when she was 13, and her life has many complex chapters. I hope she writes an autobiography someday.

She and her husband of 25 years, Charlie, live with their two rescue dogs in an enchanted house with a garden and studio, just north of town. After a full career as a nun, art teacher and playwright, she now spends her time giving encaustic workshops both throughout the U.S. and internationally.

Was your family involved in the arts?

No, but there is a creative gene on both sides of my family. My father’s mother and my father were great problem solvers with an ability to think outside the box.

My mom has always had an artistic bent, but I was the only one who formally studied art. I studied dance locally and then later in California. My undergraduate degree is in theater.

When did you start painting?

Not until 1990. I was in grad school in Berkeley, California, studying fine arts and consciousness when I had one of those moments that changes everything. I woke up one morning with the thought that I needed to paint. In theater, I did work with scene design, but I had no formal visual arts education. What came out of that experience was a series of 48-inch by 60-inch mixedmedia paintings, my first solo show and a sharp career turn from performing art to fine art.

change in temperature. Mixed-media artists love wax because it accepts almost everything without becoming compromised.

How did you get into encaustic?

When I got back from Berkeley, I began studying at the Craft Center (now Southwest School of Art). I fell in love with papermaking. I especially liked the idea that paper can become its own canvas. I began creating dimensional forms from paper and foam, but I was struggling with the surface treatment. During lunch with a friend, I learned about encaustic. This was about 2000 when the hot wax process was just being rediscovered as a medium. I loved that both mediums — the paper and the wax — were organic and worked so well together.

Plus, it has a rich history.

Yes, but here’s what’s interesting: Encaustic is one of the oldest and newest mediums. There are paintings that date back 2,000 years, and yet when I began working in wax some 15 years ago, there was only one credible book on the subject. As an artist, I had to either make my own paint or buy it directly from the manufacturer since none of the materials were sold retail. Try doing a quick online search with the word “encaustic.” You will get more than three million listings. Interest in this medium has grown exponentially in the last 20 years.

I love encaustic. It makes things so alluring and atmospheric. What is it that makes it so much fun to work with?

Its versatility makes encaustic fun, but the sensual elements of the medium make it totally addictive. I love that I can create surfaces that have layers of depth and luminosity or coatings of rich texture all with a simple

Did you always live here in San Antonio?

I was born here and lived here until I was 13, at which time I entered the convent. That decision took me to Victoria, Texas. As a nun, I was trained as an educator.

For most of my teaching career, I worked at various schools in South Texas.

Michelle Belto explains the encaustic process to Gary Sweeney.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 35 ►

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Thirteen seems young to know what you wanted to do.

It would be today, but in the ‘60s the convent was more like a boarding school. Many girls entered after the eighth grade and completed high school in the convent. It was a good way to really know if the life was a good fit. Permanent commitments were not expected for another six or seven years after high school.

I don’t think of nuns in the fine arts or performing arts. Did you do theater as a nun?

I taught theater and dance most of my secondary teaching career and even did some performing myself. My students usually mounted three fulllength productions a year, one of which was a touring show. In one school we even renovated an 1890 opera house on the proceeds of our productions and turned it into a community theater.

It never crossed my mind that a nun couldn’t be an artist.

How do you think your life might have been different if you hadn’t entered religious life?

I doubt that I would have had the same education or even the same opportunities. In my many years of religious life, I learned to appreciate solitude and the space for creativity and spirituality. Those qualities not only fostered the artist in me but have served me well most of my life.

What is your life like today?

I am now married and living in the San Antonio area. I continue to teach,

but now work primarily with adults.

My work with handmade paper and encaustic allowed me to author a book through North Light Press, catapulting me into an international teaching schedule. When I am not traveling, I am adjunct faculty at Southwest School of Art where I teach encaustic painting. As a working artist, I spend a lot of time in the studio.

What is the best advice you give your students?

It’s the same advice I repeat often to myself: “You can’t make art in your head.” I do a lot of idea exploring when I am on the road, but I am always amazed at how my ideas either do not work or change dramatically when I get into the studio. Nothing takes the place of showing up to work every day.

How have you changed as you’ve aged?

Good question. There was a time that I fought my own aging, but I think I have now made peace with the new limits of my body and personal energy. My means of expression has changed as I’ve aged. There came a time when both theater and dance took more than I wanted to give.

Painting suits me better now. I live now more interested in the journey than the destination. [I’m] much less concerned about pleasing others and more concerned about being authentic. I have come to notice the shades of gray in my own life while appreciating the colors in the lives of others. Mainly, I live more from my intuition and less from my agenda.

There is something to be said for taking life at a slower pace.

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SCREENS

BATTLE CRY Spike Lee’s Chi-Raq bypasses subtlety — and there’s nothing wrong with that SCOTT RENSHAW

Spike Lee is not a subtle filmmaker. And it has taken me nearly 30 years — up to and including his latest feature, Chi-Raq — to fully appreciate that this is not necessarily a problem.

Because I’ll confess: I’m a member of the Cult of Subtlety. There’s a unique feeling that comes from the narrative’s ideas sneaking up on you, shifting your perspectives between the opening and closing credits, or between the closing credits and the next day. The fine strokes of a paintbrush feel like art; the banging of a hammer against an anvil, even when forging a weapon, can just feel like noise.

But Lee has never been timid about forging cinematic weapons. Whether striking at the overtly political, or doing what amounts to Hollywood work-for-hire, he won’t shrink quietly into the corners. And while his relentlessness has produced both masterpieces like Do the Right Thing and misfires like She Hate Me, it’s long past time for me to recognize more consistently when relentlessness has its place. While Chi-Raq may be broad, scattershot and brazenly un-subtle, its blunt force feels bracing.

And here Lee is consciously working within a tradition of confrontational satirical truth-telling, adapting Aristophanes’ Lysistrata into the violent world of modern-day Chicago, occasionally (and controversially) dubbed “Chi-raq” for its post-9/11 homicide total, higher than American military deaths in the Middle East.

Here, the armies are rival gangs on the South Side: the Spartans, led by rapper Chi-Raq (Nick Cannon), and the Trojans, led by Cyclops (Wesley Snipes). As the gun violence continues to add casualties — including the young daughter of a local resident (Jennifer Hudson) — it seems that desperate measures are called for. That’s what Helen (Angela Bassett) suggests to Chi-Raq’s girlfriend, Lysistrata (Teyonah Parris): a “sex strike,” denying all the men the pleasures of their flesh until those men can put down their guns and end the killing.

It’s not just the premise of Lysistrata that Lee and his co-writer Kevin Wilmott ( The Confederate States of America ) have adapted here; they go full classical

Greek theater, right from the outset. The opening song plays over a black screen displaying the lyrics, serving as almost an overture. Samuel L. Jackson appears as narrator Dolmedes and announces that the dialogue will be in verse. Even the choreographed moves and “chastity pledge” evoke the unity of a Greek chorus — and a kind of unity, even from the strippers and prostitutes, that would be essential for Lysistrata’s movement to have any effect.

That theatricality makes it easier to embrace all of Chi-Raq’s more outrageous conceits, including a cadre of women, led by Lysistrata, taking over a National Guard armory simply through application of their feminine wiles and the subsequent attempt by an official of the mayor’s office (Harry Lennix) to break the women’s no-sex willpower by playing a slow jam by the Chi-Lites. And when a group of middle-aged guys in a fraternal order — led by Old Duke (Steve Harris) — decides to confront these women because after all, they’re not the problem, it feels like a wonderful swat at the #NotAllMen posturing of guys more willing to take out their frustration on uppity females than confront the possibility that they have any role to play in solving the problem.

That doesn’t mean that Chi-Raq won’t sometimes swing wildly and get caught in awkward tonal shifts.

A lengthy sequence set at a dead child’s funeral involves not just a liturgical dance, but an extended sermon by the minister (John Cusack) detailing all of the government policy decisions contributing to the culture of violence among young African-American men.

It’s also hard to take the sub-plot involving finding the identity of the child’s killer seriously, especially when it becomes clear that the obvious resolution is supposed to be somewhat surprising.

But this is, after all, the realm of the Spike Lee who will end a film with his long-favored call to “WAKE UP.” A call to action and refusal to accept the status quo like the one in Chi-Raq can certainly be delivered in an

entertaining package.

And if it needs to be delivered with a shout rather than a whisper to get that message across, that’s a lack of subtlety we should all be able to live with.

•

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SCREENS

UNIVERSAL APPEAL

Intergalactic Nemesis gives life to the serial J.D. SWERZENSKI

•

Intergalactic Nemesis is a full-sensory experience.

For all the hipster-baiting NPR-backed fare such as A Prairie backlash vinyl records or Home Companion and Radiolab 70mm film may draw, it’s have dusted off the serial format, hard to deny how fundamentally revealing how a killer story, some cool reviving an old format can be. well-timed sound effects and the There’s something tactile and direct human imagination can mix to form an about playing a ’70s pinball machine, experience more engaging than any parsing through the frayed notes of a TV episode. worn-out country record or watching Intergalactic Nemesis, the radio a silent movie with a live band drama created by Austin-based writer soundtrack. When produced right, Jason Neulander, takes the radio serial these experiences aren’t exercises in revival a few steps beyond. Utilizing live misplaced nostalgia, but a means of performers, original comic art and a connecting you to the source material sci-fi themed story channeled directly in ways that apps just can’t duplicate. from the 1930s airwaves, Nemesis One of the most deserving recent pulls back the curtain to reveal the cases to receive the retro-revival inner workings of the serial, from the treatment has been the radio serial, incredible versatility of its voice actors a form that was rudely ushered out to the carefully crafted script from which of commission following the rise of the show builds its drama. Perhaps the television in the early ’50s. For all the biggest draw to Nemesis might be the rich history of radio serials — from sight of the live Foley artist, furiously the action adventure of Buck Rogers working around a table loaded with the to the sci-fi realism of Orson Welles’ woodblocks, bubble wrap and shakers War of the Worlds — the form just necessary to make the gunshots, couldn’t compete with the tube. After footsteps and other sound effects that all, why sit around the radio color the story. and imagine a scene through For those used to taking their Intergalactic clever sound effects when stories in front of a screen (TV, Nemesis you could, like, actually see computer, theater or otherwise) $29.50 the scene on TV? Intergalactic Nemesis’ setup 4 & 8pm Sat, Dec. 12 Carlos Alvarez Studio As it turns out, all sorts may take some adjustment. But Theater at The Tobin Center as a wholly distinct means of of reasons. Podcasts like 100 Auditorium Cir. Welcome to Night Vale, The experiencing a story, this revival (210) 223-8624 Memory Palace and even tobincenter.org is about as real as they come. sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 39

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DOWN TO BUSINESS The 20Somethings tackle bento boxes ALYSSA WALKER

Bento boxes are one of our favorite lunch entrees. With all the compartments of goodness, it’s like taking a little trip down the buffet line, except with better food and no guilt. We tracked down five of the best bento boxes in SA to add some excitement to your next lunch break, and maybe to help you brush up on your chopstick skills.

GODAI SUSHI BAR AND RESTAURANT 11203 West Ave., (210) 348-6781 • godaisushi.com Godai Sushi Bar and Restaurant is often overlooked because of its dreary location. However, we found its bento boxes to be enticing. Each bento box includes tuna, shrimp and a three-piece tuna roll along with tempura shrimp and veggies, and a crab and cucumber salad. Choices range from the typical teriyakis to tonkatsu (a deep-fried pork cutlet) and chicken katsu (a deep-fried chicken breast). We chose the teriyaki salmon and, well, we think this sums it up. “This is my favorite. You can quote me on that,” Jacqueline says.

Cost: $12.95, lunch only SUSHIHANA JAPANESE RESTAURANT & SUSHI BAR 1810 NW Military Hwy., (210) 340-7808 • sushihanasan.com Right down the road from Godai is Sushihana, our second bento box stop.

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Walker and Fierro blog at twentysomethingSA.com about the city’s lifestyle and entertainment options .

All of Sushihana’s bento boxes come with six pieces of a standard Cali roll, two fried dumplings and steamed rice. Options for the main course range from vegetable tempura to beef tenderloin teriyaki. The interior of Sushihana is gorgeous, but the box lacks any real excitement. The teriyaki was delicious, but we were looking for unique sides to pair it with. Maybe a little squid and seaweed?

Cost: $8.95 to $13.95, lunch only MJ CHINA BISTRO 10103 Huebner Road, (210) 265-5800 • mjchinabistro.com Every day of the week means a different bento box at MJ China Bistro.

The restaurant features a sample of its daily roll along with edamame, pan-fried gyoza, five pieces of nigiri sushi, pepper tuna or seaweed salad. We stopped by on a Monday to get our sushi fix and enjoyed four pieces of the JK Roll (MJ’s most popular roll is made up of shrimp tempura and cream cheese wrapped in soy paper and topped with snow crab, avocado, nori stick sprinkles, spicy mayo and Sriracha dots), edamame, two panfried gyoza dumplings and five pieces of nigiri sushi. We agree with status quo, the JK roll is on our list of favorite sushi rolls in town. Also, we love themes and not having to think long about what we’d like to order for lunch. “Just the Wednesday bento special please!”

Cost: $12.99 for lunch and $13.99 for dinner

FOOD

JACQUELINE FIERRO

SAPPORO SUSHI & ASIAN CUISINE 5638 W. Hausman Road • (210) 314-4423 sapporosanantonio.com Over on Hausman Road near the UTSA Main Campus sits Sapporo, one of the least expensive sushi restaurants in San Antonio, likely due to its proximity to the school.

Bento boxes start at a mere $6.50 and come with your choice of grilled meat, steamed rice, fried gyoza, four pieces of a Cali roll and a house salad. We went with the chicken entree plus Singapore rasa noodles, which make the bento box at Sapporo. The teriyaki chicken that accompanied the bento box was left untouched because of its lack of flavor and dryness. For the amazing prices, though, this could be overlooked, just make sure to double up on the noodles. Sapporo’s playlist also adds to the experience with ’90s throwback tunes.

Cost: Lunch and dinner start at $6.50 and $7.50, respectively OSAKA STEAKHOUSE & SUSHI Multiple locations • osakasteaknsushi.com Osaka reigns supreme in my mind as the ultimate restaurant for bento boxes. With two locations, one on Bandera Road and one on Broadway, the joint knows what you want, which is, of course, sushi, piles upon piles of sushi. You can order your choice of two rolls accompanied with a salad, soup and two gyoza. Osaka also gives you the option to up your sushi game and order specialty rolls for an additional $2.50 per roll. Rainbow and dragon rolls are not off limits during lunch at Osaka. If you’d rather stick with meat (don’t do it — order the sushi bento box), the restaurant also offers kitchen bento boxes featuring the ever-popular teriyaki chicken.

Cost: $9.95 to $15.95, lunch only

We have two favorites from this tour, depending on whether you’re a sushi lover or not. If you’re sushiobsessed like me, Osaka wins hands down, every time.

They don’t skimp on the sushi rolls, and you can’t beat two rolls for lunch. Jacqueline, who would rather lay off the raw fish, loved Godai. The tempura veggies could make for a bento meal all on its own.

•

Bento boxes via Sushihana (top), MJ China Bistro (bottom left) and Osaka (bottom right).

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 41

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FOOD

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FRIDAY, DECEMBER 11 Dumplings of the World: Who’s ready for a dumpling party? The staff at Central Market will lead a hands-on class on making pierogi from Poland, chicken and dumplings, spaetzle dumplings with caramelized onions and cheese, and Amish apple dumplings. $60, 11am-1:30pm, 4821 Broadway, (210) 368-8600, centralmarket.com.

ReDo Recess: It’s a Winter Wonderland theme for this month’s adults-only takeover of The DoSeum, SA’s months-old children’s museum. The evening will include festive holiday decorations, seasonal cocktails from Johnny Hernandez’s True Flavors and savory bites from the barbecue bosses at Smoke Shack. Oh, and if you’ve been good, you’ll get a chance to meet Santa Claus himself. $15, 6-8pm, 2800 Broadway, (210) 212-4453, thedoseum.org.

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• Learn how to make tamales at the Guadalupe this Saturday.

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 12 San Antonio Coffee Festival: If you’re into caffeine and all things espresso or you just need to stay up for most of Saturday, you can stop by La Villita for the fourth annual celebration of great coffee. The lineup includes 40 coffees, along with snacks for sale and more. The fest will include an educational component as attendees learn about iced coffee brewing, fair trade coffee, coffee tourism in Central America, latte art, home brewing with a Keurig and coffee cocktail ideas. A specialty coffee tasting flight will set you back a mere $5. Free admission, 10am-5pm, 418 Villita St., sacoffeefest.com.

Bad Santa Party: In an effort to not host yet another ugly sweater party the guys at Missions Untapped are throwing a Bad Santa and Naughty Mrs. Claus Party. Dress up like the worst St. Nick around or the sexiest cookie-baker around and party with a cold local brew in hand. Prizes will be awarded for best dressed. Free admission, 8pm, 8123 Broadway, Suite B, (210) 320-0486, missionsuntapped.com.

La Gran Tamalada: The Guadalupe Cultural Arts Center, H-E-B and AARP are inviting tamal lovers of all ages to this hands-on community event, now helmed by the Cortez Family of Mi Tierra fame. Learn how to make tamales while learning about traditions past and making new memories. Free, 11am-1pm, Guadalupe Theater, 1301 Guadalupe St., (210) 271-3151, guadalupeculturalarts.org.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 13 Cookie Decorating Workshop: The holidays mean getting creative with your favorite sugar cookie. The staff at Sur La Table will walk you through creating edible art using royal icing and fun molds. $69, 2-4pm, 15900 La Cantera Pkwy., #19120, (800) 243-0852, surlatable.com.

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sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 43

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FOOD

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•

Lunch on Rebelle’s patio? Don’t mind if we do.

Fans of great views and even better lattes will get a kick out of Paramour’s (102 9th St., Suite 400, 210-340-9880) new coffee program, which debuted on Monday, December 7. Helmed by Jesse Daniel Garcia, most recently at Press and Halcyon before that, the menu features classic coffee items such as lattes, cortados, macchiatos and pour-overs made using a top-of-the-line Slayer Espresso machine. Pair your coffee with pastries from La Panadería from 7 a.m. to 4 p.m. Monday-Friday and 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. Cocktail service starts at noon on weekdays.

Over at the renovated St. Anthony Hotel (300 E. Travis St., 210-227-4392), Rebelle is now serving lunch! Pardon the exclamation point, but this marks chef Stefan Bowers’ return to lunch service after seven years of dinner, and who hasn’t wanted to eat Feast-like items come noon? The restaurant will serve lunch, with free valet parking, from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. and the menu includes starters (fried camembert wheel, fried oysters, grilled sourdough naan and potted Iowa white cheddar); salads (a baby green salad with tomato, hazelnut, mushrooms, chevre, cucumbers and shallot vinaigrette is one of four options including a pulled duck confit salad); sandwiches (a double burger, French dip, goat cheese BLT and roasted pork shoulder); and a series of entrees including chicken in green curry, Merguez ground goat kebabs, garlic-oregano Parisian gnocchi and short rib ragu.

The tide is changing over at Shuck Shack (520 E. Grayson St., 210-236-7422), which has announced its new winter menu and hours. The coast-inspired eatery will open 11 a.m. to 10 p.m. Tuesday-Saturday and noon to 8 p.m. Sundays with jumbo lump crab cake with “Fall Salad,” fried oysters with fixin’s and curbside pick-up of their can’t-miss soups — clam chowder, lobster bisque or oysta chowda — all served with a Bakery Lorraine baguette.

Seafood lovers should also note El Siete Mares (3831 W. Commerce St., 210-436-6056) has added 15 new dishes to their already extensive menu. Stop in for huachinango zarandeado (whole, butterflied red snapper marinated in chiles and charbroiled); Mar Y Tierra (lobster tail sautéed in garlic served alongside grilled skirt steak and two jumbo shrimp) and arroz negro Siete Mares (black seafood rice with seafood and oyster sauce). — flavor@sacurrent.com

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CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

FEATURING DJ SLIC RIC & DJ NAAWZ • MIXING THE LATEST MUSIC AND VIDEOS ON 5 HD SCREENS

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NIGHTLIFE

KEEPING TABS

Retro Drinks Reconsidered RON BECHTOL

•Don’t forget about Dorcol’s Brandy Alexander.

‘Tis the season for cream in everything — along with sticky, minty, chocolaty, nutty, coffee-based liqueurs you might otherwise never consider imbibing. We are also still in mourning for the passing of Mad Men and its nostalgic ’60s-era drinks. The combination can be lethal. Resist.

I’m not suggesting that a Grasshopper should never pass your lips. Nor am I passing snootier-than-thou (at least no more than usual) judgment on an occasional and abiding White Russian. (The folks at the recently opened Ringer Pub are counting on your nostalgic recollections of The Big Lebowski in highlighting the White Russian as an all-day, every-day, all-season $4 special for just that reason.) But I do feel that a little reconsideration might be in order.

For example: Said Grasshopper is a classic mix of 1 ounce green crème de menthe, 1 ounce white crème de cacao and 2 ounces cream, shaken with ice and served in a martini glass. Serious bar guys such as King Cocktail Dale de Groff present the recipe without irony.

But I recently tasted the Menthe Pastille white crème de menthe by the French company Giffard, and it’s a drink, clean and freshly minty, you might actually want to savor alone over ice. (Subbing it, of course, would result in a clear Grasshopper, so a few mint leaves might be called into action for color-coding.) The Stinger, called “the

•

Keeping cool like the Dude.

classic New York nightcap,” actually calls for the clear stuff (1 ounce), along with 2 ounces of Cognac.

Some bartenders, of which Blue Box and Brigid’s Nick Kenna is one, aren’t content to let the Grasshopper lie with mere upgrades in components and play even more with the recipe. To his ‘hopper, Kenna adds an additional half ounce of brandy. “It grounds the drink,” he says.

Kenna also fiddles with another classic, the Brandy Alexander — starting with the base booze.

The Alexander is one of those drinks of uncertain naming, with probable origin in the 1920s. The recipe calls for 1-and-a-half ounce brandy, 1 ounce crème de cacao and 1 ounce cream, shaken with ice and served in a coupe with a grated nutmeg garnish. Many a movie has featured it. For the brandy, Kenna subs locally distilled Kinsman Rakia infused with toasted pecan and cacao nibs, and in lieu of crème de cacao he uses a combination of Praline, a pecan-based liqueur made by the Sazerac folks, and Noir d’Ivoire, a distillation of two types of cocoa bean from the Ivory Coast. But wait, that’s not all: He also leaves out the cream in the shaken mix and in its place caps the coupe with a foam of simple egg white or egg white mixed with a touch of cream. The result, embellished with artfully drawn nutmeg, is almost virtuous in its lightness. You could slam down more than one of these babies.

I never really got into traditional coffee liqueurs such as rum-based Kahlua. But the combination of nostalgia and innovation brought on by current cocktail and coffee movements has led to the appearance of some new products that put the bean, not the sweetness, front and center. From just up the road in Austin, for example, comes the newly minted Caffe del Fuego.

Says co-owner Peter Remington, “We wanted something that made coffee the main flavor profile, toning down the sugar quite a bit … ” When I tasted the brew, I found it a tad subtle — this from a guy who likes really strong coffee, but don’t let that stop you. Consider it instead a sturdy base from which to compose your own Russki, white or black. (The Black Russian, by the way, is simply equal parts coffee liqueur and vodka — no cream.)

I haven’t done this, but here’s what I think might work: Have at hand a cold-brewed coffee or a cooled espresso and a little simple syrup of equal parts sugar and water — just in case the Caffe del Fuego needs amping up in your estimation. Then make the classic WR thusly: In a rocks glass filled with ice add 2 ounces vodka and 1 ounce Caffe del Fuego coffee liqueur, top with a splash of heavy cream and stir. You may now feel free to Dude the drink up with added coffee and/or simple syrup. Or not. You are in charge, not somebody’s cloying liqueur. sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 47

Two Year Anniversary Party

dorĆol is turning two & unveiling something new!

December 11th, 2015 7p–midnight your barmen:

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48

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

please enjoy:

Drinks, Food & Live Music

NIGHTLIFE

w

SEASONAL FAVORITE Hot (and spiked) cocoa you should make this winter

ROD MAN Winner

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

JES SIC A ELI ZA RR AR AS

This summer, as beads of sweat went down San Antonians’ forehead and pit stains ruined all of our clothing, we sought refuge in cool beverages. At Park Social, bar manager David Naylor turned us onto a rum-based Popsicle with fresh berries, cucumber, which was topped off with a splash of Topo Chico.

But this winter, even as mild as the one we’re currently enjoying (has it gone below 35 degrees this December?), Naylor is sharing a recipe for spiked hot chocolate that helped keep us warm through winter 20142015. Known as the Aztec slugger, the cocoa brings together a collection of all things adults crave — coffee, booze, chocolate and seasonal spices.

Served in dainty mugs, the slugger is potent, so you won’t want to knock down too many of these guys. Instead, grab your favorite mug, pop in Love Actually and use your tears to add just touch of salt to the mix — or don’t, it’s totally up to you. Naylor and co. fire up a hand-held torch to brûlée marshmallows

NBC’s Last Comic Standing Dec. 11-13

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www.sanantoniocomedyclubs.com atop the mix, but freshly whipped cream works as well. If you’re having folks over, the recipe is easily doubled or tripled and keeps well in a Crock-Pot. — flavor@sacurrent.com

Aztec Slugger

Makes 2 servings • Recipe courtesy of David Naylor

Ingredients

Directions

1 cup freshly brewed French press coffee 1 1/2 ounces whiskey, tequila, dark rum 1/2 ounce Caffe Lolita or other coffee-flavored liqueur 2 ounces bittersweet chocolate (Park Social uses 60 percent Ghirardelli) 1 1/2 ounces heavy cream 1 1/2 ounces whole milk 1 teaspoon brown sugar 1 teaspoon cayenne powder 1 teaspoon salt 2 cinnamon sticks

Combine all ingredients into small saucepan over medium heat, stirring until melted.

Ladle into coffee cups, serve with marshmallows, brûlée or whipped cream.

Variations: Sub whiskey with tequila, mezcal or dark rum.

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 49

DOWNTOWN C E NTRA L The Local Bar

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Beto’s Alt-Mex HH Happy hour from 4pm-7pm Every Day! 8142 Broadway St

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Cullum’s Atta Girl

726 E Mistletoe • (210) 437-4263 Get your Happy Hour Started Early Friday Lunch Pop 11a-2p and Micro Beers

Beer Depot

1304 S Laredo Everyday $2 Lone Star & PBR $2.5 Domestics, $3 Mexican Imports $4 Bottled Craft Brews Closed Sunday and Monday

On The Rocks Pub

270 Losoya, SATX 78205 facebook.com/ontherockspubTX HH: Mon-Fri, 2pm-7pm: $3 Wells, $3 Domestics, $3.75 Flavored Vodkas

Kimura

Happy hour monday - friday 4-7 Saturday 12-4 $6 Kimura Cocktails, $5 House Wines $4 Bottled Beer, $6 Draft Beer $3-$4 Appetizers, $6 Miso Ramen

Flair

6462 N. New Braunfels Ave. 78209 Flairmexicanstreetfood.com HH:Monday-Friday,4- 7pm, Sunday, 8-10 pm 1/2 price apps and Guac! $4 craft draughts $3 off cocktails and win $6 Michelada all day everyday

Tucker’s Kozy Korner

1338 E Houston St • (210) 320-2192 Sunday Brunch: Bloody Mary Bar and Bottomless Mimosas

Toro Taco Bar

114 Brooklyn Ave • torotacobar.com Reverse Happy Hour 9pm

Sancho’s

628 Jackson St, • (210) 320-1840 4- 7pm Every Day Frozen Margs: $2.25, Well Drinks: $3.25 Select Cans: $2.50 Monday - Wednesday: Reverse Happy Hour 9-11pm

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516 E Houston All Day Food and Drink Specials Everyday Kitchen Open Until 1am Everyday

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CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

VISI T HAPPYHOUR S.SACURRENT.C OM

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Daily Lunch Specials 11a-3p Closed Mondays

Embers Woodfire Bar & Grill

Happy Hour at the Bar and on the Patio Daily from 4pm - 7pm and 9pm - Close Drafts 12 oz. $2.00 16 oz. $3.00 | 25 oz. $4.00 Michelob Ultra, Miller Lite, Bud Light & Shiner $1 Off All Cocktails Wine by the Glass Premium Draft Beerst

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7pm - 9pm Mon-Sat: 7am - 4pm $5 House Margaritas, $2.50 Domestic $3.25 Import Drafts & Mini Margaritas Bottles, Tecate & Dos XX, $2.75 Domestic Drafts $3 Indio and Bohemia, and Mexican Draft $4. Tue- $3.25 Mini Hurricanes 427 N Loop 1604, Ste 202, SATX 78258 Thu- $3.25 Premium Vodka Specials Behind Trader Joe’s Sun- $.75 Wings & $3 Sunday Specials 4-8pm: $1 off mixed drinks Slackers & appetizers!

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NORTH EAST Charlie Brown’s Bar & Grill

Charlie-Browns.com • 210-496-7092 Mon.Fri. until 7pm $2.75 well drinks, $8.50 domestic pitchers, $2.75 domestic longnecks Mon.-Fri. 2-6pm 60¢ Wings Wednesday special from $6.50 domestic draft pitchers

Pecan Grove

1526 Roosevelt Ave Cheap Ass Monday $1.25 Domestic Beers Daily Specials, it’s always Happy Hour

sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 51

52

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

SWINGED OUT Christian Scott breaks (down) jazz MATT STIEB/@MATTHEWSTIEB

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• Kind of Red Horn player Christian Scott isn’t one to bow to prior generations’ belief that the swing rhythm is a the status quo. His music is kinetic, alive and everdefining feature of the music. changing, dancing its way out of his instrument “When you’re not on a jazz bandstand and everything and into the room. His haircut is an inspired take on the else that you hear doesn’t [swing], but it still touches fade, tight and patterned on the sides with spiraling locks you, or captivates you, or you can relate to it, you start to on top. And his trumpet isn’t a trumpet at all. create things that don’t necessarily have the older thing “If I’m being clear, I hate the trumpet,” Scott said in it,” said Scott. “Because how relevant is it to you, over the phone. “I’ve always thought the trumpet has a other than the fact that you’re told you’re supposed to terrible sound. I thought the trumpet was too brash, too play it as a jazz musician?” dark and too piercing.”

Born in New Orleans in 1983, Scott came up playing Scott employs four prototypes on his new record the horn with his uncle, the magnificent alto saxophonist Stretch Music, horns that bend at odd and beautiful Donald Harrison. Since his debut as a leader in 2002, angles. A Frankenstein of brass, Scott commissioned Scott has embraced the role of innovator: He sees these hybrids of the trumpet, flugelhorn and coronet to something he likes and wants to make it better. Even in achieve a more perfect tone. his language — wanting to “customize your experience” “The reason I created the hybrid is, it kind of gives me of listening — Scott sounds like a young magnate a means to create multiple sounds within the confines of pitching his work. one instrument,” said Scott. “I refuse to believe the idea His newest disruption is in the drum kit itself, or notion that the trumpet was perfect 100 years ago. I moving away from the traditional setup and toward an think that’s pretty stupid.” instrument that is both modern and ancient. Working The sound reporting from Scott’s horn maintains with Fonville and Dyson Jr., Scott developed a kit that that hybrid spirit, marching into unexplored territory combines the trap sounds of the Roland 808 and 909 with great confidence. His eighth studio effort, drum machines with the bass drum subbed out for a Stretch Music, plops jazz, New Orleans street djembe — the goatskin goblet drum of West Africa. rhythms, hip-hop and indie rock into a blender and “The natural sub on the djembe can completely chops these forms into something wild and new. match the 808 or 909 bass drum sounds,” said Scott.

Between songs, Scott opts for innovation over “‘Cause it’s the first sub. That was a lot of fun for us, consistency, demanding his musicians to stretch their creating a space that had the full history of the drums.” understanding of what jazz can be. As a leader, Scott asks His second development, like so many out there, is the most from his rhythm section. From the chaotic funk of an app. Built with developer Tutti Player, Scott’s Stretch “West of the West” to the Big Easy parading of “TWIN,” Music app allows a listener to control the record in real Stretch Music’s rhythmic landscape is a diverse and time, using easy volume faders to isolate, turn up or cut updated map of the evolving beats of contemporary music. out an instrument in the mix. For entertaining producer Scott opens the album with “Sunrise fantasies, or sitting down to improvise in an allin Beijing,” a morning beat for the overstar setting, the app is an audiophile’s delight.

Christian Scott with caffeinated. Drummers Corey Fonville and “How cool would it have been if in 1958, Roger Blevins Jr. Joe Dyson Jr. flex over the track in a nimble 1959, when Miles’ band was recording $25-$60 7pm Sun, Dec. 13 and muscular performance, reminiscent of a ’Round About Midnight or Kind of Blue, if Tobin Center for halfback’s feet bobbing through defenders. you could take the trumpet out and play the Performing Arts Of all the rhythms in Scott’s music, it’s rare record as Miles Davis,” Scott asks in a promo 100 Auditorium Circle (210) 223-8624 to find swing, the so-called echt pulse of jazz. video. “What would music sound like today if tobincenter.org Scott, feeling “swinged out,” doesn’t share you actually had the resources to do that?”

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PRIVATE EVENTS - PAPERTIGERSA@GMAIL.COM sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 53

MUSIC

GALINA BETKER

‘YOU CALLED ME ON THE PHONE LAST NIGHT’ Gary Wilson on being Gary Wilson DENISE DE GLOPPER

In short, Gary Wilson is strange and sincere.

A life-long musician of multiple instruments, student of John Cage, home recording prodigy and performance artist, Wilson has experienced a career almost as peculiar as his romantically charged electronic lounge jams and as unpredictable as his mock teen idol shows — performances that include throwing sacks of flour, splashing paint, duct taping a mannequin to his back or covering himself with a bed sheet and crying — all of which is just part of what he describes as “Gary Wilson Music.”

You couldn’t call it anything else with much conviction. Although, it’s fair to say his particular brand of outsider pop music has influenced an impressive lineup of artists from the highly evident Ariel Pink to more surprising musicians like Earl Sweatshirt of rap collective Odd Future.

“One thing that I learned from meeting John Cage was that you want to stand apart from everyone else and find your identity somehow, don’t try to sound like anyone else. It takes a while because as you go on you’re influenced by all kinds of things,” Wilson says.

“It was all teen idols, Dion, Bobby Rydell, Fabian and so on until I saw the Beatles when I was in seventh grade, met Captain Beefheart in 11th grade. As a teenager, I was interested in the most extreme art and the most extreme music available at the time, so that works its way into my shows.”

It’s been 38 years since Wilson self-released his seminal album You Think You Really Know Me, a solo composition so far ahead of its time that it almost never took off. His popularity only grew over the next two decades and Wilson developed a cult following that eventually led to Motel Records hiring a private detective to find him in 2002. Wilson calls this his “resurrection.”

In addition to ongoing requests for re-releases of older works it gave rise to several new albums, a documentary and a European tour backed by members from the Gary Wilson tribute band, Cindy.

“Do you ever feel bummed...” I pause, realizing that’s a terrible way to begin a question, but Wilson finishes for me, “ … that it didn’t happen sooner? Believe me, I was 54

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

Wilson with two Blind Dates

time. So it’s been a real journey, and even then it took another four or five years to hit it. It caught me off guard.”

Alone with Gary Wilson is his newest album, which succeeds a discography of albums following the same theme of love sick solitude. A bit less atmospheric, it packs plenty of ’70s key-toned, danceable grooves.

Wilson is the only musician heard trying to push that album, I was playing on the album, which was playing CBGB, started shopping recorded in his home, but he performs labels in New York City, I even got with backup band The Blind Dates a manager ... Labels would take when playing live because, as he puts the album and say, ‘Oh, we really love this it, “What could be worse than just me coming out in album. We just don’t know how to market it,’ and I was front of a tape?” thinking, ‘What the hell are you guys talking about? If One of Wilson’s most endearing qualities is his you like it, what’s the problem?’ But as time goes on, you lovelorn protestation, his starry-eyed pleading with, and keep doing what you’re doing.” into, the void of heartbreak.

“You hope for the best, I mean it took quite awhile for “My songs about … the girls in my life are tuned to my things to happen for me. I’m greatly appreciative that it did fond and somewhat sad memories of my hometown of happen after thinking it was never going to.”

Endicott [New York]. Of course growing up But Wilson says the journey’s always been as a young guy in a small town, my band of exciting, even when he needed to work the Gary Wilson & The Blind friends had a keen interest in girls, though night shift at a video store to get by.

Dates with More Eaze many times not achievable,” Wilson says. “I “I remember duct taping my sneakers and Smokey Robinsins sing to those who never made it to first base. together, you know? I was hearing about $8-$10 8:30pm Fri, Dec. 11 Never had a chance to kiss a girl, let alone Beck mentioning me the year Odelay came K23 Gallery fall in love, to the lonely people who are never out, he was winning an award and I had to 702 Fredericksburg Road selected for a promotion in their work, to all go into the midnight shift with my duct tape (210) 776-5635 facebook.com/K23Gallery those who are a little different.” sneakers,” Wilson says. “You go through that

ON SALE NOW! sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 55

Esta Semana Dec. 9

8-10pm • Ruben V

Dec. 10

6:30 - 8:30pm • Brothers Rogue 8:30 - 10:30pm •Michael Martin

Dec. 11

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6:30 - 8:30pm • River Barons 9 - 11pm • Chacho & Brance

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56

CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

RIVERTINI AWARD WINNER 600 N. Presa St. Inside the Maverick Building 210.267.9885 THELOCALBARSA.COM LIKE US ON FB: THELOCALBARSA

MUSIC

NATURAL VIBES SA’s Deer Vibes presents stellar debut LP The Nature Of JAMES COURTNEY

Even though he’s only 26, Michael Carrillo (aka Mikey Vibe), the creative mastermind behind San Antonio’s Deer Vibes, has been an important force in local music for years. Deer Vibes, best described as a kind of orchestral indie pop/rock act, was formed in 2008 after Carrillo’s former band dissolved, leaving him anxious to create a new project. The group’s first output, the Ventura EP, was released in 2010 and re-released by Texas Is Funny Records in 2011.

In a recent phone interview, Carrillo told me that this re-release was really his way of restarting the band after he had found a more or less consistent core lineup. In the years since, Carrillo and crew have played tons of shows and slowly worked on the songs that comprise Deer Vibes’ first full-length LP The Nature Of. While the forbiddingly ambitious size of the compositions demands a constant influx of musical talent, the stability, at least with respect to the core members, has paid off in that it has allowed Carrillo to bring this excellent album to fruition.

Now, Deer Vibes will release and present the album in full on Saturday at the Empire with a huge assist from Youth Orchestras of San Antonio. Carrillo told me that this exciting collaboration with YOSA, which will finally allow him to present these songs in the way he dreamed them up, came about as an indirect result of YOSA’s recent OK Computer Live show. Seeing

•

From left to right: Stephen Flores; Joseph Eric Montano; Devin De Leon; Darian Thomas; Troy Peters (YOSA director); Jordan McCarthy; Michael Carrillo; Courtney Jeanette Sanchez; Kristian Barboza

YOSA’s director Troy Peters’ interest in working with while “Bet Me” is, quite pleasantly, all over the place, local musicians gave Carrillo the idea that perhaps integrating brassy interludes within an ambitious, lush, such a collaboration would be possible. And, after widescreen landscape. The nine-minute song finds quite a bit of doing, his dream of presenting a full-on, the young outfit toying with elements of classical, funk, orchestral show will be realized. On stage Saturday, contemporary rock and jazz. Lyrically speaking, like all Deer Vibes will swell to over 40 members as it’s joined of The Nature Of, Carrillo keeps it nebulous, even while

by YOSA players. lamenting addiction, anxiety and disappointment writ The Nature Of starts off with a playful percussion and large. His lyrics here, filled with desire and frustration keys exchange, quickly followed by ascending, gently in equal measure, conclude with a bit of twisted hope. lapping waves of strings and a wistfully triumphant brass When he sings “Angel below, we could leave this passage. With this first song, “Still I Reach (Think I town, for a better peace of mind,” it’s not clear if this is Saw You),” which slowly builds for two minutes before transcendence or retreat. exploding into fullness, Deer Vibes sets the tone for the Other album highlights include the jangly and patient rest of the 11-track album. It’s an album of contrasts — “One Fifty One,” “Paper,” the album’s best song, and stillness and furious movement, open space and clutter, “Your(e) Light,” a stripped down track that showcases classical and indie rock, unity and isolation — that excels Carrillo’s hauntingly penetrating gift at pure singerlargely due to its sprawling, (maybe almost exhaustingly) songwriter stuff. emotive character.

Where so many young bands pile on meaningless “Furious Styles” and “Bet Me,” tracks two elements in hopes of convincing the and three, extend the musical hybrid space discerning listener of their creative complexity, that pervades the album. Just you try to pick Carrillo keeps a razor sharp focus on the Deer Vibes Album Release out all the influences reflected here or genres with Youth Orchestras of natural complexities of his unique sonic San Antonio feat. Brandon side-stepped. When I mentioned the music’s vision and the way it unfurls according to the Cunningham maddening lack of easy precedent to Carrillo, $10 demands of each individual song. This is a he beamed. “Well, sounding like nobody else 8pm Sat, Dec. 12 remarkable and elegant debut, like a great Charline McCombs Empire Theatre is always a good thing.” movie that can unravel you in a million different 226 N. St. Mary’s St. “Furious Styles” piles on more rock band ways, from one of the most ambitious musical (210) 226-5700 fury than most other songs on the album talents we have. majesticempire.com sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 57

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CURRENT • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

WED

9

White Reaper

Rock 'n’ roll has all been done before; not that White Reaper gives much of a shit about that. The four-piece pilfers from classic punk with abandon, barely bothering to cover their tracks when lifting “whoa-oh” choruses right from the Ramones or plucking the power-punk attack of The Buzzcocks (or perhaps Ty Segall) right out of their playbook. But like most great omnivorous bands, the trick lies in pulling less obvious influences. Check the Television-inspired interlocking guitar trade-offs that close “Ohh (Yeah),” or the way Ryan Hater’s organ summons the ghosts of ’60s garage rock past. Most importantly, White Reaper has learned early on from all the great anthem writers: The best punk songs are at their core bubblegum pop, just soaked in distortion and cheap beer. In that, the band’s newly released full-length White Reaper Does It Again is true to its title, never privileging speed, lyrics or any such distraction over pure hooks. After spending the last year on the road, the boys have started to hit their stride as a live band, a trend that should continue upward considering the band’s talent at every position. With Us Weekly, Junkie and Loafers. $7-$8, 8pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com –J.D. Swerzenski

Wednesday, December 9

Angry Samoans “They saved Hitler’s cock/ hid it under a rock/if Hitler’s cock could start to talk/it would say to kill today.”

Thus, the absurdist brilliance of the Angry Samoans. It's perfect for covering at coffee shop open mics or high school talent shows. With Swingin’ Dicks, Worm Suicide, Sudden Attack and American Swine. Korova, 8pm Every Time I Die The Southern hardcore of Every Time I Die avoids the typical trappings of the exponentially tweenleaning genre. With August Burns Red, Stick to Your Guns and Polyphia. Alamo City Music Hall, 6:30pm Chris Knight Knight has been billed as “Cormac McCarthy meets Copperhead Road.” The modern Mark Twain and the classic Steve Earle record are high praise for any artist. Whether Knight is there, is for you to decide. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8:30pm Machine Head Taking the most gruesome elements of grunge and pitting it against metal cliches, Machine Head’s video “Darkness Within” gives the notoriously dark Game of Thrones the midnight sweats. Aztec Theatre, 7pm

the home of the pickle shot into a disco.

Take the sparse, breathy soundscapes of dark Hollywood auteur David Lynch, mix in the arpeggiated, minimalist punk brilliance of Suicide and you’re in the same area code as Massiver. With Knifight. Hi-Tones, 10pm

200 10141 Wurzbach, San Antonio, Texas 78230 • (210) 877-2100 wurzbachicehouse.com • Corner of Ironside and Wurzbach

FunkaSaurus Tex Get those sharp shoes on because it’s rug-cutting time. For fans of funk, R&B and classic soul, FunkaSaurus Tex “lay down the boogie and play that funky music ’til … ” they’re done with the set. The Amp Room, 8pm Slaves In tradition of frustratingly long and baffling post-hardcore song names , “My Soul Is Empty And Full Of White Girls”

by Slaves is stuff of legends. There’s a twist, though, because they replace the traditional Cookie Monster growls with intense crooning. With Inamorata and Farewell to Arms. Korova, 6pm

Friday, December 11

Thursday, December 10

A Home Concert With Paper Moon Shiners An impressive handle of early 20th century songwriting makes Paper Moon Shiners’ tunes a perfect fit for campfire nights and roasting wieners in a train yard on a Cadillac grill. Wolverton Home Concerts, 7:30pm

Capyac CD Release with Massiver With the millennial swag of Jamiroquai, all Kangol fuzzy hats and moving sidewalk funk, Austin’s Capyac try their hand at turning

Femina-X Firmly rooted in the organic and ephemeral, Femina-X are a fitting juxtaposition of programmed beats and

A Big Band Christmas The Pearl’s newest upscale music venue, Jazz, TX – set to open in Spring 2016 – announces a Christmas Big Band show featuring venue owner Doc Watkins, accompanied by his 16-piece orchestra. Pearl Studio, 8pm

POOL • DARTS • PING PONG ENJOY OUR PATIO AREA

Deicide Besides the guitar wizardry in the instrumental breakdowns, Deicide sounds like the time you and Satan got into a belching contest in a dream after you listened to more metal than the average dietary recommendation allows.

Korova, 7pm

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MUSIC

synth-y swells. With Verisimilitude and Something Fiction. Imagine Books & Records, 8pm

family of seven, have been performing old-school gospel music. Carver Community Cultural Center, 8pm

The Falls Presents PROG Night Local prog rockers Remanon are hosting three of Austin’s most prolific prog acts. Transit Method, Groove Think and Opposite Day, with Remanon headlining at midnight. The Falls, 9pm

Junior Brown That voice. Those licks. Come see the Texas legend with the double neck slide guitar. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8:30pm

The Golden Dawn Arkestra Otherworldly funkster family Golden Dawn’s lone recording, last year’s eponymous EP, was often described as cinematic, both for its scale and multi-toned direction.

Live, that cinematic feeling becomes even more enveloping. Paper Tiger, 9pm Ranch House Wielding the witty songcraft of the Northeast's best woodsy wordsmiths and a flair for headbopping white kid college music, Brady Dietert’s band have got their shit together. With Snowbirds. Sanchos Cantina, 9:30pm Royal Punisher Jazz quartet Royal Punisher combine the nothing’sforbidden-all-is-permitted spirit of punk rock with the more classic instrumentation of the Sunday-best genre. La Botanica, 8pm San Antonio Symphony: The Nutcracker This enduring classic realizes Tchaikovsky’s original vision — exquisite choreography, sets and costumes — accompanied by the San Antonio Symphony. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 7:30pm

Saturday, December 12

Brian Setzer Orchestra The Stray Cat does Christmas classics. Make that Old Navy money, Brian, I ain’t mad. Majestic Theatre, 8pm The Daddyo’s Like your first bong hit, The Daddyo’s induce you into a mellowcoated coma where all your fears fade into memories of summertime. With The Dizzeases and Whatever? The Mix, 9pm The Jones Family Singers For 30 years, Bishop Fred A. Jones and his wife, FirstLady Sarah Jones, along with their

Pinko Tour Kick-off Singer Alex Mendez sounds flailing and dangerous, like a wounded animal with a microphone.

With Hamburguesa, Joseph Anger & The Strange, Detonate and Drut.

Hi-Tones, 10pm

FEATURED SHOWS DEC 11 – JASON BOLAND AND THE STRAGGLERS

Sunday, December 13

Maneaters of Tsavo and Crown Prepare your neck braces for the primordial riffage of Maneaters of Tsavo and the blues-y, ballbreaking badassery of one of SA’s best bands, as voted by you. With Antique Scream. Southtown 101, 11:30am My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult The iconic industrial group hits up SA. With Dead Love Club and Minister Fiend. Jack’s Patio Bar, 8pm

DEC. 11 - DEICIDE

DEC 19 – CHARLIE ROBISON

Monday, December 14

Preston Lacy of MTV’s 'Jackass' As mainstream pop culture veers more and more towards the absurdist nonsense of hardcore S&M as performed by skate punks, Preston Lacy of the Jackass crew is a crowned prince in the Kingdom of The Ridiculous. With Tom Garland.

Korova, 7pm

DEC. 12 & 13 - DEAD KENNEDYS

DEC 26 – WILLIAM CLARK GREEN

Swing Night with the Hot Texas Swing Band Ready your cat clothes and distractingly long wallet chains. Sam’s Burger Joint, 7pm

Tuesday, December 15

Glenn’s Gems Enjoy an evening of all vinyl rock ‘n’ roll as the husband/wife duo behind K23 Gallery curates the tunes at La Botanica every Tuesday. La Botanica, 8pm Robert Earl Keen On the “Merry Christmas from the Fam-o-lee Tour,” Keen brings his classic Texas music to town, with some holiday faves thrown in. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 7:30pm

Alamo City Music Hall 1305 E. Houston St., alamocitymusichall.com Aztec Theatre 104 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 812-4355 theaztectheatre.com Carver Community Cultural Center 226 N. Hackberry St., (210) 2077211, thecarver.org Hi-Tones 621 E. Dewey Pl., (210) 573-6220, hitonessa.com Imagine Books & Records 8373 Culebra Road, (210) 236-7668, imaginebookstore.com Jack’s Patio Bar 3030 Thousand Oaks Drive, (210) 494-2309, jacksbarsa.com La Botanica 2911 N. St. Mary’s St., vivalabotanica.com Majestic Theatre 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-5700, majesticempire.com Paper Tiger 2410 N. St Mary’s St., papertigersa.com Pearl Studio 200 E. Grayson St. #115, (210) 212-9539, atpearl.com Sam’s Burger Joint 330 E. Grayson St., (210) 223-2830, samsburgerjoint.com Sancho’s Cantina 628 Jackson St., (210) 320-1840, sanchoscantinaandgrill. com Southtown 101 101 Pereida St., (210) 263-9880 The Amp Room 2407 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 3202122, theamproom.com The Falls 226 W. Bitters Road, (210) 490-5553, thefallsbar.com The Korova 107 E. Martin St., (210) 226-5070, thekorova.com The Mix 2403 N St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-1313 Tobin Center for the Performing Arts 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, tobincenter.org Wolverton Home Concerts (210) 473-9062, facebook.comWolvertonHomeConcerts

CELEBRATING 6 YEARS

DEC. 14 - PRESTON LACY (JACKASS) KorovaSA

KorovaSA

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UPCOMING SHOWS

JAN 16 – COREY SMITH

12/09 12/10 12/16 12/17 12/30 01/01 01/02 01/03 01/09 01/13 01/22 01/27 01/29

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Angry Samoans Slaves Kottonmouth Kings English Beat Darkness Divided Punkfest Leftover Crack Orgy Lisa Loeb Legendary Shack Shakers Christian Death Venom Inc Black Tusk

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SISTER ACT I’m a straight female in my mid 20s. I’ve been dating a wonderful guy for two years — but I recently found something that has put me on edge. Before we met, he was in a relationship with a terrible, alcoholic and mentally unstable woman. They got pregnant early in the relationship and stayed together for about five years.

We met a year after they broke up. I felt like I’d come to terms with the ugliness of his past, with his trying to stay in a bad relationship for the sake of his child and the rest of it.

But recently, thanks to the vastness of the Internet, I came across a suggestive photo of my boyfriend with his ex’s sister.

I asked him about it, and he admitted to sleeping with her while he was with his ex. He says it was during a particularly bad period, he was very drunk, she made the first move, etc., but I’m just so grossed out.

Cheating is one thing, but fucking your girlfriend’s sister?

And it’s not like this was a 19-year-old’s mistake; he was near 30 and the father of a child.

He also fudged a little about whether it was just one time or a few times. I feel like now I’m questioning his integrity. This is something that I wouldn’t have thought him capable of doing.

What do I do?

All Twisted Up What do you do? You ask yourself if you believe your boyfriend when he says fucking his then-girlfriend’s sister was a mistake, ATU, one he deeply regrets, and one he never intends to repeat. If you can’t be romantically involved with someone capable of doing such a terrible sister-fucking thing, the question is a rhetorical one. You’ll have to end the relationship regardless of the answer.

But if you could stay with someone capable of doing such a terrible sister-fucking thing, and if you believe your boyfriend when he says it was

SAVAGE LOVE

by Dan Savage

a mistake, one he regrets, and won’t happen again, then you stay in the relationship.

And when your find yourself feeling squicked out by the knowledge that your boyfriend fucked around on his previous girlfriend with her own sister, you remind yourself that good and decent people sometimes do shitty, indecent, sister-fucking-ish things — and then you pause to consider all the shitty and/or indecent things you’ve done in your life, ATU, some, most, or all of which your boyfriend presumably remains blissfully unaware of.

It’s too bad that suggestive/ incriminating photo is rattling around out there in the vastness of the internet, ATU, but I’m curious about how exactly you “came across” it in the first place. If you went looking for dirt — if you were snooping — you found it. Congrats. I’m not against snooping in all instances. People often find out shit they had both a right and an urgent need to know: the BF/GF/NBF*/fiancé/spouse is cheating in a way that puts you at risk, they’re running up ruinous debts, they’re hiding a secret second family, they’re attending Donald Trump rallies, etc. But just as often, we find out shit we didn’t need to know — something in the BF/GF/NBF’s past, something they regret, something they’ll never do again (do you even have a sister?) — and can never unknow.

You learned that your boyfriend did something pretty fucked up. Whether you decide to stay or go, ATU, remember that you snoop at your own risk — sorry, remember that you explore “the vastness of the internet” at your own risk. * Nonbinary friend.

On the Lovecast, it’s the oneminute wonder show! Listen at savagelovecast.com. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter sacurrent.com • December 9­­—December 15, 2015 • CURRENT 63

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JONESIN’ CROSSWORD by Matt Jones

Answer on page 27 Rackspace US, Inc. – San Antonio, TX. SQL Server Database Administrator III. Perform DB engg & admin activities incl design, planning, configuration, monitoring, automation, self-serviceability, alerting, & space mgmnt, DB backup & recovery. Req. Bachelor’s degree in Comp Sci, CIS, MIS or a dir rel field +5yrs. of DB rel exp. Will accept Master’s degree +2yrs of described exp. Send resume to: careers@rackspace.com, Ref. 16803.

Rackspace US, Inc. – San Antonio, TX. Windows Systems Administrator II, LATAM. Provide high level tech support for Windows sys’s & server issues to our customers over the phone, via chat, & in support tickets.

Req. Bachelor’s degree in Electronics Engg or a dir rel field +3yrs. of rel tech exp. 2nd Shift, 2PM-11PM. Multiple positions available.

Send resume to: careers@ rackspace.com, Ref. 17912.

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ACROSS

1 Tyler of “Archer” 6 “Omnia vincit ___” 10 “Pygmalion” playwright 14 Athletic team 15 The 29th state 16 When repeated, a Billy Idol hit 17 Chinese leader born in Norway?

19 “This is for,” on an env.

20 One in Wiesbaden 21 “Yes way, Jose!”

22 Elton John collaborator Bernie 24 Messy digs 25 Chopping tool 26 “Free Space” game 27 Prefix for pod or corn 28 Subtle signal 29 April 15 payment 32 Complaining when you have to stand during that stadium thing?

36 Gas used in signs 37 Like a fossil 38 Elevator pioneer Elisha 39 Part of my Ukraine itinerary, maybe?

44 Card issued by the DMV 45 Tabula ___ 46 Bud on a tuber 47 Number of legs on a daddy

longlegs 49 Beats by ___ (headphones brand) 50 Law school grads, for short 53 1950 Isaac Asimov book 55 PBS’s “Science Kid” 56 “The World According to ___” (1982 film) 57 Spend fewer bucks 58 Economist Bodie at an animal attraction?

61 Company whose product names are in all caps 62 Collect from work 63 Barbershop tool 64 Presidential run?

65 “Let It Go” singer 66 Fashion sense

DOWN

1 Stubborn beasts 2 Work release statement?

3 Cheerful 4 “Airplane!” star Robert 5 Letters on a toothpaste tube 6 Window alternative, on a flight 7 “Out of the way!”

8 Get behind?

9 Carrying on 10 Dragon faced by Bilbo Baggins 11 Touchy topic, so to speak 12 Apt to vote no

13 Las Vegas casino mogul Steve 18 2004 Britney Spears single 23 “My Way” songwriter Paul 25 Gallery wares 26 Irwin who won this season of “Dancing With the Stars” 27 Work the bar 28 Name yelled at the end of “The Flintstones” 30 Tel ___, Israel 31 Marks a ballot, maybe 32 “Felicity” star Russell 33 Narration work 34 Bring up 35 Made a tapestry, e.g.

36 Org. of Niners, but not Sixers 40 2012 Affleck film 41 Game played with five dice 42 Tiny Willy Wonka candies 43 Solid caustic 48 Steel girder 49 “The People’s Princess” 50 Like most “Peanuts” soundtracks 51 Dog slobber 52 Mold particle 53 “___ just me ...”

54 Zen garden tool 55 “Dear” group 56 Winged pest 59 “Batman Forever” star Kilmer 60 Apr. 15 addressee

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): “Happiness sneaks through a door you didn’t know that you left open,” said actor John Barrymore. I hope you’ve left open a lot of those doors, Aries. The more there are, the happier you will be. This is the week of all weeks when joy, pleasure, and even zany bliss are likely to find their ways into your life from unexpected sources and unanticipated directions. If you’re lucky, you also have a few forgotten cracks and neglected gaps where fierce delights and crisp wonders can come wandering in.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): What state of mind do you desire the most?

What is the quality of being that you aspire to inhabit more and more as you grow older? Maybe it’s the feeling of being deeply appreciated, or the ability to see things as they really are, or an intuitive wisdom about how to cultivate vibrant relationships. I invite you to set an intention to cultivate this singular experience with all your passion and ingenuity. The time is right. Make a pact with yourself.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): Like Metallica jamming with Nicki Minaj and Death Cab for Cutie on a passage from Mozart’s opera The Magic Flute, you are redefining the meanings of the words “hybrid,” “amalgam,” and “hodgepodge.” You’re mixing metaphors with panache. You’re building bridges with cheeky verve. Some of your blends are messy mishmashes, but more often they are synergistic successes. With the power granted to me by the gods of mixing and matching, I hereby authorize you to keep splurging on the urge to merge. This is your special time to experiment with the magic of combining things that have rarely or never been combined.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): I hope you can figure out the difference between the fake cure and the real cure. And once you know which is which, I hope you will do the right thing rather than the sentimental thing.

For best results, keep these considerations in mind: The fake cure may taste sweeter than the real one. It may also be better packaged and more alluringly promoted. In fact, the only advantage the real cure may have over the fake one is that it will actually work to heal you.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22): There’s a sinuous, serpentine quality about you these days.

It’s as if you are the elegant and crafty hero of an epic myth set in the ancient future. You are sweeter and saucier than usual, edgier and more extravagantly emotive. You are somehow both a repository of tantalizing secrets and a fount of arousing revelations. As I meditate on the magic you embody, I am reminded of a passage from Laini Taylor’s fantasy novel Daughter of Smoke & Bone: “She tastes like nectar and salt. Nectar and salt and apples. Pollen and stars and hinges.

She tastes like fairy tales. Swan maiden at midnight. Cream on the tip of a fox’s tongue. She tastes like hope.”

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): I bought an old horoscope book at a garage sale for 25 cents. The cover was missing and some pages were water-damaged, so parts of it were hard to decipher. But the following passage jumped out at me: “In romantic matters, Virgos initially tend to be cool, even standoffish. Their perfectionism may interfere with their ability to follow through on promising beginnings. But if they ever allow themselves to relax and go further, they will eventually ignite. And then, watch out! Their passion will generate intense heat and light.” I suspect that this description may apply to you in the coming weeks. Let’s hope you will trust your intuition about which possibilities warrant your caution and which deserve your opening.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): “The secret of being a bore is to tell everything,” said French writer Voltaire. I agree, and add these thoughts: To tell everything also tempts you to wrongly imagine that you have everything completely figured out. Furthermore, it may compromise your leverage in dicey situations where other people are using information as a weapon. So the moral of the current story is this: Don’t tell everything! I realize this could be hard, since you are a good talker these days; your ability to express yourself is at a peak. So what should you do? Whenever you speak, aim for quality over quantity. And always weave in a bit of mystery.

fortune. So here’s the bottom line: In whatever way you choose to bet or speculate, don’t let your lively spirits trick you into relying on pure impulsiveness. Do the research. Perform your due diligence. It’s not enough just to be entertained. The goal is to both have fun and be successful.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19): Ancient Greek philosopher Epicurus was a pioneer thinker whose ideas helped pave the way for the development of science. Believe nothing, he taught, unless you can evaluate it through your personal observation and logical analysis. Using this admirable approach, he determined that the size of our sun is about two feet in diameter.

I’m guessing that you have made comparable misestimations about at least two facts of life, Capricorn. They seem quite reasonable but are very wrong. The good news is that you will soon be relieved of those mistakes. After some initial disruption, you will feel liberated.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18): Aquarian inventor Thomas Edison owned 1,093 patents. Nicknamed “The Wizard of Menlo Park,” he devised the first practical electrical light bulb, the movie camera, the alkaline storage

battery, and many more useful things. The creation he loved best was the phonograph. It was the first machine in history that could record and reproduce sound. Edison bragged that no one else had ever made such a wonderful instrument.

It was “absolutely original.” I bring this to your attention, Aquarius, because I think you’re due for an outbreak of absolute originality. What are the most unique gifts you have to offer? In addition to those you already know about, new ones may be ready to emerge.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20): Here’s an experiment that makes good astrological sense for you to try in the coming weeks. Whenever you feel a tinge of frustration, immediately say, “I am an irrepressible source of power and freedom and love.” Anytime you notice a trace of inadequacy rising up in you, or a touch of blame, or a taste of anger, declare, “I am an irresistible magnet for power and freedom and love.” If you’re bothered by a mistake you made, or a flash of ignorance expressed by another person, or a maddening glitch in the flow of the life force, stop what you’re doing, interrupt the irritation, and proclaim, “I am awash in power and freedom and love.”

THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21): Ducks are the most unflappable creatures I know. Cats are often regarded as the top practitioners of the “I don’t give a f---” attitude, but I think ducks outshine them. When domestic felines exhibit their classic aloofness, there’s sometimes a subtext of annoyance or contempt.

But ducks are consistently as imperturbable as Zen masters. Right now, as I gaze out my office window, I’m watching five of them swim calmly, with easygoing nonchalance, against the swift current of the creek in the torrential rain. I invite you to be like ducks in the coming days. Now is an excellent time to practice the high art of truly not giving a f---.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21): My old friend Jeff started working at a gambling casino in Atlantic City. “You’ve gone over to the dark side!” I kidded. He acknowledged that 90 percent of the casino’s visitors lose money gambling. On the bright side, he said, 95 percent of them leave happy. I don’t encourage you to do this kind of gambling in the near future, Sagittarius. It’s true that you will be riding a lucky streak. But smarter, surer risks will be a better way to channel your good

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EXHIBITION ORGANIZED BY THE SEATTLE ART MUSEUM AND THE MUSEO NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. THIS EXHIBITION IS SUPPORTED BY AN INDEMNITY FROM THE FEDERAL COUNCIL ON THE ARTS AND THE HUMANITIES. JOAN MIRÓ, FIGURE AND BIRD, 1968. LOST-WAX CASTING, PATINATED BRONZE. NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. © SUCCESSIÓ MIRÓ / ARTISTS RIGHTS SOCIETY (ARS), NEW YORK / ADAGP, PARIS 2015.