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• FREE haircuts provided by Career Point College for children in grades K-12. First-come, first-serve basis. • Records: Parents, if you are in need of a copy of a Birth Certificate or Shot Record (for those born in Texas and Immunization Records administered in Bexar County) the Office of the City Clerk will be on-site. Birth Certificate Records are $23 and Immunization Records are $5. Must have legal guardian or representative and valid photo ID. • Registration Table: You will be able to register for Hourly Raffles/Prizes. (No purchase necessary) • FREE dental screening provided by Cute Smiles 4 Kids. • Student Immunization: Parents will be able to receive NO COSt/LOw COSt Immunization for their children provided by San Antonio Metropolitan Health District. Price of immunization is determined by family income. Immunization available only while supplies last. Must have legal Guardian or representative and valid photo ID. • Discounted student physicals plus bike raffle provided by Little Spurs Pediatrics Urgent Care. $25 walk-in rates. Firstcome, first-serve basis. • Back to School $250 Gift Card Giveaway: Five winners will be announced at 3pm on the main stage to win a $250 gift card to the following stores: Burlington, Burkes Outlet, Hobby Lobby, Ross Dress for Less & School Yard.

TOTAL TOTAL EVENT IS FREE TO THE PUBLIC: • Back to School Fashion Show produced by Lari Nelson, The Agency • Special performance by Barbara & Tammy’s School of Dance • FREE Face Painting and Balloon Artist from 1PM – 3PM • FREE Arts & Crafts/Games & Prizes

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CONTENTS August 5-11, 2015

9 NEWS Spirit Of The Letter Texas’ new textbook standards are an embarrassment Hard Work Skilled refugees in Texas struggle to overcome professional barriers 14

SA’s Heart And Soul Councilwoman Rebecca Viagran seeks balance between preservation and development near the Missions

14 CALENDAR

Our top picks for the week

21 ARTS Puro Style Creative minds behind BarbacoApparel weigh in on bean and cheese tacos, the Donkey Lady and more

24 SCREENS

Eat Your Veggies Vegan fare shines at La Botánica Throwback Sweets Or why we’re into Gable’s Ice Cream Sliders Culinary Calendar 6 ways to get your drink/grub on this week Flavor File Openings around town and more

41 NIGHTLIFE Swanky Drinkin’ How locals can enjoy the new bars inside La Cantera Hill Country Resort Bottle & Tap Two local breweries celebrate anniversaries this month

47 MUSIC Shirt On Your Back How bands can tap into the T-shirt economy for muchneeded gas money Cosmic Shore Carl Sagan meets rock ‘n’ roll in the delirious space-surf of Man or Astro-man? Out With The Old St. Mary’s Strip mainstay Limelight returns under new, audiophilic management

A Rebel And His Bike Fond memories of Pee-wee’s Big Adventure three decades later

Music Calendar What to see and hear this weekend

Soft Spot For Sweetness Actress Elizabeth Daily (Dottie) on Pee-wee and his unmistakable style

61 ETC.

Longing For Eternal Love Diane Salinger (Simone) talks Pee-wee, Peter Pan and Paris The Bicycle Thief Catching up with Pee-wee’s nemesis, Francis (Mark Holton) All About That Basement We descend into one of the Alamo’s two basements In Memoriam Remembering 12 late Big Adventure actors Love Letter To Philosophy A spoiler-free review of Woody Allen’s Irrational Man

6 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

33 FOOD

Savage Love Jonesin’ Crossword Free Will Astrology This Modern World

ON THE COVER

Blink and you’ll miss SA, but we can’t get enough of Pee-wee’s Big Adventure — even three decades later Illustration by Ray “Tattoed Boy” Scarborough Art direction by Sarah Flood-Baumann

sacurrent.com • May 13-19, 2015 • CURRENT 7

Love Art? Enjoy People? Become a Docent! Train to teach in the galleries and give tours to visitors of all ages. Seeking both English and bilingual Spanish speakers. No previous experience necessary. Want to find out more? Attend a Docent Preview Session: Tuesday, August 18, 4:00 to 6:00 p.m. RSVP or for more information: moira.allen@samuseum.org or 210.978.8121

SAN ANTONIO MUSEUM of ART 200 West Jones Avenue | San Antonio, Texas 78215 | 210.978.8100 | samuseum.org 8 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

NEWS

SPIRIT OF THE LETTER Anti-Confederacy Movement Rekindles Texas Textbook Controversy MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN

Five years ago, the Texas State Board of Education stirred controversy when it approved new guidelines for history courses that downplayed slavery’s influence on the Civil War and excluded the Ku Klux Klan and Jim Crow laws from U.S. history textbooks. Six weeks ago, 21-year old Dylann Roof walked into the Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church in Charleston, South Carolina, and allegedly murdered nine African-Americans. When media dug up his Facebook page, they found photos of Roof brandishing a Confederate Flag and donning symbols related to Neo-Nazis. While the families of the victims struggled with their loss, a national conversation about racism and the Confederate flag was thrust in the national spotlight and government organizations across the country — including Bexar County — began ordering removal of Confederate symbols. Then talk in Texas shifted back to the revised history books — ones that land on desks later this month when kids go back to school. “So this is why this has become a story recently,” said Jose Medina, deputy communications director for the Texas Freedom Network, a watchdog activist group that has locked horns with the education board over what it sees as excessive conservative Christian influence in school curriculum. Medina told the San Antonio Current that there has been some confusion over the outrageous omissions and mischaracterizations that were written into the state curriculum guidelines. “There’s just been confusion as to what the standards say as opposed to the textbooks, which are supposed to be written to those standards,” Medina said. “And publishers walked a fine line (between) those standards and not caving in.” For instance, Medina said publishers did include slavery as the main reason for the Civil War, Jim Crow, the KKK and sharecropping. However, other misrepresentations were still included in the textbooks. The Board of Education’s official review of the textbooks included 140 people — just four of them academics, according to Texas Freedom Network. So the organization conducted its own review after obtaining access to textbook packages through a Regional Education Service Center. The organization contracted with Dallas Southern Methodist University, Virginia’s University of Mary

Washington and the University of Texas at Austin to review 18 textbooks for issues related to religion. Here are some questionable sections and summarized analyses of conclusions from the review: United States Government (McGraw-Hill School Education) This text claims the “biblical idea of a covenant, an ancient Jewish term meaning a special kind of agreement between the people and God, influenced the formation of colonial governments and contributed to our constitutional structure.” Analysis: This is nearly the opposite of historical truth. America’s founders believed in a social contract, which came from British political thought with a heavy influence from John Locke’s social contract, not a Jewish covenant. Basic Principles of American Government (Perfection Learning) This text has a table that places the Biblical figure Moses at the top of a list of who influenced the writers of the Constitution, thereby influencing the document. Here’s a description of Moses from the text: “During State education leaders tried to whitewash slavery from history textbooks. their years of wandering in the desert of Sinai, Moses handed down God’s Ten Commandments to the Hebrews. These Magruder’s American Government (Pearson Education) commandments now form the bedrock on which the Jewish, Muslim, and Christian codes of behavior are The book includes a “Biography of Moses,” which calls the based. The full account of Moses’ life can be found in the Ten Commandments “a guide and basis for many legal and Bible’s book of Exodus.” moral systems” and states: “Moses was a lawgiver and great Analysis: First, Moses’ inclusion and the story of the leader. Like the founders of the United States, he helped Ten Commandments seems like it endorses a religious establish a legal system to govern his people.” claim. Secondly, the text doesn’t specify what exactly Analysis: The text exaggerates the “influence and influenced the framers, making the contribution nebulous relationships between Moses and the Founders.” Also, and contestable. Moses’ governing was theocratic, which is unlike democracy. United States Government: Principles in Practice (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt) These are but a few problems found during the review. There are also passages that blame violence in the Middle We’ll just leave this here: “The Framers’ political thinking East on jihad, which is a broad characterization blanketing was influenced by a Judeo-Christian religious heritage, Islam for a complex problem involving many factors, including which includes traditions common to both Judaism and U.S. influence. Christianity. These religions see the law and individual Another book describes the Middle East and North Africa rights as being of divine origin. Moreover, the Framers as being “occupied” by “the Muslims” or “in Muslim hands.” benefited from the Protestant Reformation, a sixteenthAnd world geography textbooks downplay the role and century Christian reform movement whose leaders brutality of Christian conquest in the New World. developed ideas about individual responsibility, the Luckily, many teachers are able to use additional resources, freedom to worship as one chooses, and self-government.” particularly primary resources, to Analysis: Again, no specific examples of a law or set educate children. of laws in the Bible that influenced the founders and the “History is history and should be taught as much,” Medina text doesn’t offer a founding document influenced by the said. “Unfortunately, the State board has a history of feeling “Judeo-Christian” concept of law. Not only that, Martin different about facts, but by and large, teachers do a good Luther and John Calvin — two key figures in the Protestant job in the classroom.” Reformation — didn’t view self-government the same way mreagan@sacurrent.com the founders did and weren’t tolerant of other religions. sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 9

NEWS

MICHAAEL MARKS

HARD WORK Skilled Refugees Face Hurdles To Ply Their Trade In Adopted Country MICHAEL MARKS/@MICHAELPMARKS

Sabah Al-Dehaisy enjoyed delivering babies the most. The 48-year-old Iraq native worked as a large animal veterinarian for over 15 years. In that time he delivered countless cows, goats, horses, mules and other animals. “Being a veterinarian is a good job. I liked it all, but I liked the babies the most,” Al-Dehaisy told the San Antonio Current. “I miss it.” Seven years after applying, Al-Dehaisy received approval last year to resettle in the United States as a refugee. But the opportunity came with a sacrifice: He would need years of additional training to practice veterinary medicine in the U.S., despite nearly a decade of veterinary school and another 15 years of experience in Iraq. He’s far from alone. In the U.S., barriers such as equivalency standards, additional licensing and learning a new language stand between skilled refugees and a job in their chosen profession. Many turn to minimum wage jobs to stay afloat. “It’s really difficult for [refugees] who are highly educated to find work in their fields,” said Margaret Constantino, director of the Center for Refugee Services, a San Antonio nonprofit. “They can get back into their fields, but it usually takes them several years and it’s very expensive.” The problem is particularly pronounced in Texas, which led the nation in refugee resettlements over the past three years — including 2,500 in San Antonio. The president decides the number of refugees allowed to resettle in the U.S. each year, in consultation with Congress, nonprofits and various federal agencies. President Obama set the cap at 70,000 people for 2015, divvied up unevenly between various regions of the world. Most come from Africa and East Asia. Once they arrive, refugees who were doctors, engineers, lawyers and teachers with years of experience back home start from scratch in the United States. Obtaining the necessary licenses and degrees to work in the United States can be time consuming, challenging and expensive — particularly for those with little grasp of English. But experts say that many refugees, who have typically fled intense danger and tragedy, are undaunted by the challenge. “Individuals who are highly educated and have that advanced ... certification, it will take them a little bit of time to gain their footing in the U.S,” said Amanda 10 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

Sabah Al-Dehaisy nearly died in his native Iraq working for the U.S. Army. Now a refugee in SA, he’s trying to work as a veterinarian.

Posson, vice president of programs at the nonprofit Refugee Services of Texas in Austin. “But overall we see consistently that they’re all ... survivors.” Near-Death Experience Al-Dehaisy looks like an archaeology professor dressed for the field. Each time I met him he wore the same blue, long-sleeved button-down shirt with a Samsung logo and tan cargo pants. His moustache is neatly trimmed, his wristwatch’s faux-leather band strapped tightly to his left wrist. He likes San Antonio because the heat reminds him of his hometown, Baghdad. He is quiet and analytical, unmarried, quick to admit when he doesn’t know a word in English but even faster to ask what it means. After completing a five-year veterinary degree program at the University of Baghdad, Al-Dehaisy served two compulsory years in the Iraqi military, from 1989 to 1991. Although Iraq invaded Kuwait during his service, he didn’t see any action. He spent most of his time tending to mules in the country’s mountainous northern region. Al-Dehaisy first applied for resettlement in the U.S. as a refugee in 2007 — a rigorous process that’s the ultimate exercise in dotting I’s and crossing T’s. The smallest mistake on a form can send you to the back of the line for the few slots allocated each year, he said. To qualify as a refugee, one must face “persecution or

a well-founded fear of persecution on account of race, religion, nationality, membership in a particular social group, or political opinion,” according to the federal Office of Refugee Resettlement. Al-Dehaisy qualified because he worked with the Army as an interpreter during the U.S. invasion of Iraq in the mid-2000s. As an interpreter, Al-Dehaisy was a prime target for militia violence. That came to a head in November 2007 in what could have easily been a deadly encounter. While on leave in Baghdad, a fellow interpreter pointed Al-Dehaisy out to a car of Shi’a militia members. One of them hopped out of the car and shot him three times in the back with a pistol. After he fell, he was shot twice more, once in each leg. Al-Dehaisy said he wasn’t sure if the same man was responsible for every shot, or if a rooftop sniper hit him in the legs. One of the shots shattered his tibia, which is now held together with a titanium plate. His left leg is a few centimeters shorter than his right because of the surgery. Walking can be painful; running is out of the question. His gait, along with five nickel-sized scars, is a reminder of his home’s turmoil. “I live in the U.S. because I can’t go back my country. My country has too many problems,” Al-Dehaisy said. “There’s too much hurt in Baghdad.” But Al-Dehaisy was lucky — he already had a support system in San Antonio, where he resettled in September

NEWS

Where They Come From Country Of Origin

Source: Texas Department of State Health Services

2014. His brother and two sisters live here and Iraqis made up the largest refugee contingent in Bexar County in 2014. While waiting to hear on his application, he went back to school and earned additional certifications, conducting experiments in obstetrics and in vitro fertilization. No Time To Waste Nonprofit agencies support new refugees by helping them find housing, navigate public assistance programs and sometimes offering cash. But that aid, backed by state and federal resources, is limited and typically dries up after six to eight months. Earning income as quickly as possible becomes the backbone of successful resettlement. “U.S. resettlement programs are built on refugees entering employment and becoming as self-sufficient as possible,” Posson said. “In order for that machine to work, refugees need to be getting employed really quickly.” That often means taking the first job that comes along, regardless of how much it pays or if it has nothing to do with their background. Flyers for work opportunities dot the bulletin board at the Center for Refugee Services, a drab brick building just outside Loop 410 on Wurzbach Road. Much of San Antonio’s refugee community clusters in apartment complexes along this stretch of Wurzbach. The center is a hub for the SA refugee community. Constantino and her staff of volunteers offer the gamut from ESL classes, food and clothing and help with cutting through red tape tied to government programs. The center depends on private donations and grants. Many refugees who go there have exhausted their

federal benefits. Inside, the center bubbles with activity. Some refugees tap away at a bank of computers, while others filter in and out to drop off a form or look at the bulletin board. Young high-pitched voices with perfect American accents careen into the lobby from a back room where kids play. The jobs advertised at the center are unskilled low-wage positions. They’re for hotel housekeepers, dishwashers, food runners and movers. None pay more than $10 per hour; some state plainly that they start at minimum wage. “[Refugees] usually end up taking those low-wage entry level jobs that you and I would not necessarily want, but they have to pay the rent somehow,” Constantino said. “They have to survive. Sometimes those are the only jobs they can get in the beginning.” Some employers habitually hire refugees. Nino’s Fresh Cut Fruit and Vegetables is one of them. Juan Nino, a Mexican immigrant himself, started the business in 1991 selling fresh produce out of his 1983 Ford F-250. Now, at the San Antonio Produce Terminal on the Westside, he employs over 120 people — about a third are refugees — to chop and package fruits and vegetables for sale to caterers and restaurants. Nino said he likes to hire refugees because they tend to be dependable and have a strong work ethic. Although few speak English, they catch on to the work quickly and stick around longer than his local hires. Nino pays new hires $8.75 an hour and offers insurance benefits after three months. “I’m the type of business owner who likes to give opportunity to anybody. I like to give opportunity to single mothers, I like to give opportunity to the younger

Percentage Of Bexar County Refugees In 2014

Iraq

Cuba

Myanmar

Afghanistan

Iran

Bhutan

Democratic Republic of Congo

Somalia

Other

Eritrea

Ethiopia

generation, and I like to give opportunity to people coming from other countries,” Nino said. Path To The Goal Al-Dehaisy is not currently working. He relies on savings from his vet and translating days and gets support from his brother, who works in telecommunications. He shares an apartment with his siblings. Landing a gig has crossed his mind, but he’s more focused on his long-term goal of working as a veterinarian. Lately, he’s spent most of his time at the Center for Refugee Services, using the center’s computer lab to apply for doctoral programs in animal science. To work as a vet again, Al-Dehaisy will have to earn a Doctor of Veterinary Medicine degree. It’s at least another four years of school. He’s already started the application process to Texas Tech University in Lubbock, nearly 400 miles north from his family in San Antonio. “I would go to Boston, Mississippi, it does not matter,” he said. “In the U.S., the veterinary field is hard. Not everybody can do it.” But he’s not bitter about the extra time, effort and money he’ll have to expend in order to meet his goal. He remains undeterred, even optimistic. There’s no lack of determination in him. “Now, I think I’m in a good path to my goal. But I am walking step by step,” Al-Dehaisy said. “I hope to work in this field. And I hope to be married and have a good family. Not much.” mmarks@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 11

12 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

NEWS

SA’S HEART AND SOUL World Heritage Status Ushers Balancing Act For South Side’s Future MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN

South Side Councilwoman Rebecca Viagran is no stranger to the delicate dance of placating developers while protecting her constituent’s interests. She took heat for how she handled the removal of renters from the Mission Trails mobile home park last year to make way for high-end apartments — though she convinced the developer to provide financial help to displaced people. Roughly half a year later, Texas’ first World Heritage Site is in her backyard. More development, along with a probable increase in tourism, is imminent. Missions Concepción, San José, San Juan and Espada are in Viagran’s district. The historic sites, along with the Mission de Valero, aka The Alamo, were granted World Heritage Status by the United Nations in early July. Viagran couldn’t be more proud of the prestigious recognition, which highlights the South Side, an area undergoing revitalization after neglect due to the city’s northward expansion. “Now, when some people were feeling very overlooked — disrespected in other areas and ways — we had UNESCO, the world, give us recognition. They recognized all the work that we’ve done,” Viagran told the San Antonio Current last week. “I believe that District 3 does represent the heart and the soul of the real San Antonio, if you will.” Yet she’s aware it’s not a fait accompli, since the prestige could be stripped away. “This is not something that I won’t do all that I can do to make sure it’s not put in danger, peril or jeopardy,” she said. But putitng a halt to all new development near the Missions, however, isn’t a realistic. And World Heritage Status is expected to bring more economic opportunities to District 3. That boon is impossible without development, which can be tricky, particularly now that the world has recognized San Antonio — and the South Side — for its preservation efforts. Earlier this year, the last residents of the Mission Trails mobile home park — a 10-minute walk away from Mission Concepción — were forced off the property to make way for a luxury apartment complex. During the World Heritage nomination process, opponents of the development who criticized Viagran for working with the developer warned that displacing local

Rebecca Viagran, whose ciy council district takes in most of the Missions, wants a balance between preservation and development.

residents could threaten the nomination because local character is part of the World Heritage package. “I think that whole conversation is going to be different if that were to ever happen again … the whole thing will be different because of the city council housing committee and the housing commission the mayor has established,” Viagran said. Those nomination fears never became reality, but that doesn’t mean a similar situation won’t arise down the line. So it’s crucial to keep in mind that it’s just about the people as much as it is the place. “We still have to tell the stories of our communities and the character of each neighborhood because they all tell a story together … and the neighborhoods around it are very unique and distinct,” Viagran said. And as developers move in, Viagran will have to balance the need for development with maintaining World Heritage Status with developers eager to move into the territory. That’s where the Mission Protection Overlay Zoning district factors in. It provides regulations to protect the integrity of the San Antonio Missions. Those rules were approved last year. “It was part of our nomination process,” Viagran said, referring to the zoning requirements. “And it passed their test as well.” However, concerns about new development around the Missions popped up quickly after San Antonio learned about the prestigious designation. The 210 Developers group is planning to build at least two apartment complexes in the area — one at the

Mission Marquee Plaza and another in the former St. John’s Catholic Seminary. A third proposal at 131 Huizar is still in the works. “I am going to err on the side of caution and I’m going to be very careful as we move forward with whatever development comes around this area,” Viagran said. “And so, that’s really my mindset. But to stop any and all construction near the Missions? I think that would be doing ourselves a disservice.” For instance, Viagran said she would like to find ways to get more coffee shops and restaurants that reflect local flavor in the area. There are sidewalk and infrastructure improvements that need to be done. She would also like to see more residents opening up small businesses. And more public art is a plus, she said. But there are certain types of development that Viagran said are unacceptable. “Anything industrial is something that we are going to keep off the table,” she noted. Balancing development with local integrity near the United States’ 23rd World Heritage site isn’t going to be a cakewalk and the potential for controversy is ripe. “We are now getting opportunities in District 3 that we had not been getting for a long time,” Viagran said. “So we need to be very cautious and diligent about going forward.” However, one thing is for sure: World Heritage Status ushers in a new chapter in South Side history and, hopefully, future international visitors will take back home with them a positive perspective about this traditionally overlooked and underserved area of our city. mreagan@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 13

CALENDAR

WED

Alyssa Edwards DRAG

While it might not pack the over-the-top glam punch of his recent star-studded birthday bash at the Aztec, LGBT nightlife kingpin Rey Lopez’s latest offering showcases a Texan RuPaul’s Drag Race alum with big things on the horizon. A fan favorite on season five, Alyssa Edwards (born Justin Johnson) has collected titles on the drag pageantry circuit as well as trophies as owner/ creative director of youth-oriented Beyond Belief Dance Company. In the works since 2013, the hopeful reality show Beyond Belief has the potential to put a fierce spin on Dance Moms in the Dallas suburb of Mesquite. $10-$20, 11:30pm, Heat, 1500 N. Main Ave., text (210) 386-4527 for reservations. — Bryan Rindfuss

14 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

FRI

‘Sad Boy Church’ ART

Since blipping our radar back in 2012, the artist now known simply as Saakred has evolved considerably, experimenting with an array of genres (from dark electronica to “mestizaje blues”), coming out as transgender and charting unexpected territory with 2015’s Make Believe, an EP which Current music editor Matt Stieb described as “a vision of taut and emotional rock ‘n’ roll.” In an effort to raise funds to attend a five-month program at Burren College of Art in Ireland, Saakred is unveiling “Sad Boy Church,” an exhibition and sale of visual art enhanced with a short, intimate performance. Free, 6pm, Esperanza Peace and Justice Center, 922 San Pedro Ave., (210) 228-0201, esperanzacenter.org. — BR

FRI

‘Ugly Pretty Things’ ART

Comprised of emerging artists from San Antonio and Houston, The CRITT Project (Conversations Representing Individual Thoughts Together) aims to spark creative dialogue across the Lone Star State. Curated by Almendra Castillo (aka Almondcastle), the collective’s “Ugly Pretty Things” brings together sculpture, photography, drawing, installations and performances by Castillo, Cinthia Gomez, Pink Leche, Yma Luis and Jessica Sailors. Favoring a fleshy palette, the group show investigates “the underlying truth behind a beautiful thing” while touching on themes of insecurity, shame and desire. Free, 6pm-midnight, R Gallery, 725 S. Presa St., (210) 862-8875, facebook.com/ rgallerystx. — BR

SAT

Rock For Paws Festival SPECIAL EVENT

When I think of pups and cute cats, I don’t immediately free associate with hard rock. But the Rock For Paws Festival at Fitzgerald’s looks to place the two closer together. On Saturday, Rock For Paws features sets by 17 bands (including Eden Burning, Shadow Fashion and Shotgun Vendetta) to benefit the Animal Defense League of Texas. Founded in 1934, the ADL is a no-kill shelter dedicated to the humane treatment and adoption of dogs and cats. Be warned if you visit ADL’s website: You might spend a good chunk of the workday looking at adorable, adoptable pets. $5-$8, noon-2am, Fitzgerald’s Bar & Live Music, 437 McCarty Rd., (210) 629-5141, adltexas.org. — Matt Stieb

CALENDAR

SAT

Juanita y Los Feos MUSIC

Punk en español? Si, por supesto! Hailing from Madrid, Juanita y Los Feos are a dynamic punk-rock outfit that thrives on toeing the line between power and sugary sheen, between sheer motion and patience. While it wouldn’t be quite proper to call the group’s propulsive, new-wave-influenced music pop-punk, it’s certainly more in that order than, say, the other acts on this gnarly bill: SATX’s Fea and Colonia and Chicago’s Sin Orden, all of which play an infuriated, burn-the-fucking-housedown style of punk rock. In between sets of face melting, be sure to dig the spins of DJ Heavyflow, who rounds out this girl-powered show. $5, 10pm, Hi-Tones, 621 E. Dewey St., (210) 573-6220. — JC

SAT

The Hip Girl’s Guide to the Kitchen WORDS

Don’t let a small kitchen, lack of high-tech appliances or general fear of the stove keep you from enjoying your summer harvest with tips from Kate Payne, Austinite and author of The Hip Girls Guide to the Kitchen. Payne’s stop at The Twig will kick off with a pickling demo with recipes for snacks and appetizers that showcase farmers’ market produce and impress your guests. From kimchi to yogurt — her guide offers techniques for jamming, preserving, roasting, infusing and braising for glutenfree, dairy-free and vegan diets and more without busting your budget. Free, 11am-1pm, The Twig Book Shop, 306 Pearl Pkwy., Suite 106, (210) 826-6411, thetwig.com. — Jessica Elizarraras

SAT

Lone Star Beer Texas Heritage Festival MUSIC

Now here’s a Texas festival that’s just as eclectic and no-bullshit as the Lone Star State itself. The Texas Heritage Festival, presented by “The National Beer of Texas,” is dancing a four-city waltz across the state this August. At the San Antonio stop, catch musical acts the Old 97’s (Dallas alt-country stalwarts, pictured), Grupo Fantasma (ATX Latin fusion Grammy winners), Dale Watson (ATX honky-tonk revivalist), LaTasha Lee (Corpus Christi soul singer) and more. The event is free on a first-come, first-serve basis, but a $25 donation (benefiting the San Antonio Food Bank) secures you a spot. Free, 1pm, Lone Star Brewery, 600 Lone Star Blvd, lonestarbeer.com. — James Courtney

SAT

‘Santa Vida’ ART

With her works steeped in nuevo-Aztlán cultural symbolism that incorporates the traditional Catholic religious imagery and themes of her childhood in South Texas, Regina Roman expertly melds the sacred and the profane, the local and the universal. The results are humorous, endearing, challenging and nothing short of brilliant. Her unique artistic vision, which becomes a kind of personal spirituality through ritual and symbolism, is Chicana-centric and decidedly melodramatic in the most rewarding of ways. Her work aims, at least in part, for the decolonization of the iconography she reveres. Free, 7pm, Silkwörm Studio and Gallery, 1906 S. Flores St., (210) 607-1322. — JC

sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 15

San Antonio Restaurant Week is a celebration of amazing San Antonio restaurants – your chance to try out as many of those restaurants you’ve always wanted to try or to visit an old favorite. Participating restaurants will offer a prix-fixe menu – encompassing a threecourse lunch and dinner – for one of two different tiers.

Reservations are not required to participate – but, are a good idea – and can be booked directly with the restaurants. For a complete list of participating restaurants and more information on Culinaria’s charitable programs, visit www.culinariasa.org. Twitter: @culinariasa Facebook.com/CulinariaSanAntonio Instagram: @culinariasa

16 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

CALENDAR NIGHTLIFE

THU-FRI

6-7

‘Sex & Cinema with Mel Casas’

Together with Central Library’s “Art About Art” (which closed July 31), Texas A&M’s “The Southwestern Clichés” (on view through September 27) and the Guadalupe’s “Getting the Big Picture” (on view through October 24), FL!GHT Gallery’s new exhibition “Sex & Cinema with Mel Casas” rounds out a citywide tribute to late artist Mel Casas (1929-2014). An El Paso native, Casas played a key role in San Antonio-based Chicano art group Con Safo in the ’60s and ’70s, landed in the 1975 Whitney Biennial and taught “a generation of artists” during his 29 years at San Antonio College. Originally sparked by a glimpse of a drive-in movie screen (on which a close-up image of a woman appeared to be “munching” trees amid the landscape), Casas’ epic Humanscapes series (1965-1989) serves as a common thread between all four exhibitions. Curated by art historian/educator/author Ruben C. Cordova and encompassing nearly half of the 150 large-scale paintings that make up Humanscapes, the quartet of shows touches on myriad themes — from Chicano identity and Nixon-era politics to pop art and censorship. Rooted in Casas’ view of cinema as a “fantasy machine” and the drive-in as “a place for sexual experience,” FL!GHT’s “Sex & Cinema” comprises 10 paintings, including some of the oldest works in the Humanscapes series. Free, 6-10pm Thu-Fri, FL!GHT Gallery, 134 Blue Star, (210) 872-2586, facebook.com/flightsa. Through August 22. — Bryan Rindfuss

Art

Art opening: “40 New Works” Haus

Collective hosts a solo show of illustrations, paintings and digital media installations by San Antonio-based Xavier Gilmore. Free, 7pm Thursday; Haus Collective, 108 Blue Star.

Art opening: “Copathetic” Massachusettsbased Andrew Leo Stansbury and San Antonio artist Libby Rowe’s collaboration “Copathetic” explores a child’s incessant need to be nurtured — pitted against a woman’s struggle with societal constructs of motherhood. Free, 7-10pm Saturday; The Lullwood Group, 107 Lone Star Blvd.

Art opening: “Gastronomique! And Other Works on Paper” Local artist

Mignon Harkrader presents three suites of photomontages exploring various aspects of Carnivalesque theory and film noir. Free, 6-9pm Thursday-Friday; Terminal 136, 136 Blue Star, (210) 439-8505.

Art opening: “Lullaby” Currently pursuing

an MFA at UTSA, artist Sarah Fox conjures otherworldly beasts and animal/human hybrids in “visual poems” that fuse elements of painting, drawing, collage and illustration. Free, 7-10pm Thursday-Friday; Hello Studio, 1420 S. Alamo St., Building B, Suite 106, (210) 291-8640.

Art opening: “New Works by Michael Martínez and Charlie Young” Studio

Fantomas and Lady Base Gallery co-host an exhibition of new works by Michael Martínez and Charlie Young. A multimedia artist who combines poetry, installation

and animation, Martínez explores the queer experience from a Chican@/Latin@ perspective. Through photography, Young captures “an intimate reflection of identity during visits to his hometown in the Rio Grande Valley.” Free, 7-10pm Saturday; Studio Fantomas, 1906 S. Flores St.

Art opening: “To and Fro” Curated by Raul

Gonzalez in tandem with the independentlyrun Texas Artist Connection (which aims to connect established and emerging artists across the Lone Star State), “To and Fro” brings together paintings, drawings, sculpture, collage and multimedia projects by the likes of Jose Cardenas, Adrienne Cullins, Sarah Fox, Michael Anthony Garcia, Matt Manalo and Eduardo Portillo. Free, 6-8pm Thursday; Carver Community Cultural Center, 226 N. Hackberry St., (210) 207-7211.

”25: Veinticinco” Ricardo Romo, Kent Rush and Arturo Infante Almeida co-curate works by 25 artists, including Ricky Armendariz, Benito Huerta, Luis Jiménez, Anita Valencia, Alex Rubio and Guillermina Zabala. Free, 8am-5pm WednesdayFriday, 8am-5pm Monday-Tuesday; UTSA Downtown Campus Art Gallery, 501 W. César Chávez Blvd., (210) 458-4983

”All School Exhibition” The Southwest

School of Art’s well-rounded “All School Exhibition” features recent works from the likes of Chris Sauter, Margarite Guggolz and Gary Schott alongside a pool of juried students, studio artists, adjunct faculty and the talented teens of “Bee Nation.” Free, 9am-4pm Wednesday-Saturday, 11am-4pm

SAT

Muppets Most Wanted

After breathing new life into the Muppet franchise with the 2011 family musical aptly titled The Muppets and even winning an Oscar while doing it (“Man or Muppet” was pretty darn catchy), director James Bobin, music supervisor Bret McKenzie and the entire cast of Jim Henson’s foamy friends returned for Muppets Most Wanted, this time without lead actors Jason Segel and Amy Adams. While the 2014 sequel wasn’t as critically acclaimed as its predecessor (although why wouldn’t it be with actor Christoph Waltz dancing a waltz and a cameo by Danny Trejo?), it still provided laughs and proved fans were interested in waxing nostalgic, which is probably one of the reasons Kermit and company were given a brand new TV series on ABC, starting September 22. We’ll see if the sitcom’s Office-style format will get people to tune in. Until then, Slab Cinema is keeping the Muppets momentum going as the gang gets caught up in an international jewel heist. Tina Fey uses an Eastern Russian accent, Ty Burrell does an impersonation of Inspector Jacques Clouseau and the Muppets sing about how sequels are never as good as the original. Free, 8:15pm, Mission Marquee Plaza, 3100 Roosevelt Ave., (210) 207-6968, slabcinema.com. – Kiko Martínez

Sunday, 9am-5pm Monday-Tuesday; Southwest School of Art - Navarro Campus, 1201 Navarro St., (210) 224-1848.

”Cursive Wanderings” In their imaginative

collaborations, “visual pen pals” Greg Rubio and Ann-Michèle Morales incorporate elements of the surrealist parlor game exquisite corpse and mail art. Charmingly old-fashioned, the duo’s practice is rooted in sketch books — filled with everything from poppy collages to architectural patterns — that have been snail-mailed to and from Texas cities (San Antonio, Austin, Harlingen, Houston, Corpus Christi) and even to Mexico. On view through October 2 in the Guadalupe Theater Gallery, Rubio and Morales’ exhibit “Cursive Wanderings” comprises a selection of books and sculptural objects. Free, noon-5pm Wednesday-Friday, noon-4pm Saturday, noon-5pm Tuesday; Galería Guadalupe, 723 S. Brazos St., (210) 271-3151.

”Seditious Industrial Complex Licensing Office” Curated by Hills Snyder, Stevan Živadinovic’s “Seditious Industrial Complex Licensing Office” involves a “new line of mutinous consumer goods” that combine references to Guy Fawkes, patents, arson and Wal-Mart. Free, 2-7pm Thursday-Saturday; Sala Diaz, 517 Stieren St., (972) 900-0047.

Summer 2015 International Artistsin-Residence Acting as guest curator for the summer installment of Artpace’s International Artists-in-Residence program, Istanbul-based Ian Alden Russell selected

Gabriel Martinez (Houston), Wafaa Bilal (New York) and Fatma Bucak (London/ Istanbul) — a group he felt would “form a sort of family.” With shared “points of connection in their negotiation of social and political issues,” the trio has spent the last two months creating projects that explore public space and interaction (Martinez), chromotherapy as it relates to war veterans (Bilal) and immigration and the U.S.-Mexico border (Bucak). Free, noon5pm Wednesday-Sunday, Artpace, 445 N. Main Ave., (210) 212-4900.

Film

Possession The McNay’s Way with Words

film series picks back up with a screening of writer/director Neil LeBute’s 2002 mystery starring Gwyneth Paltrow and Aaron Eckhart as a pair of literary sleuths who unearth the amorous secret of Victorian poets Randolph Henry Ash and Christabel LaMotte. $5-$10, 2pm Sunday; McNay Art Museum, 6000 N. New Braunfels Ave., (210) 824-5368.

Song of the Sea SAMA and Slab Cinema’s

outdoor Family Flicks series spotlights Song of the Sea, an Irish animated fantasy about the last seal-child, Saoirse, and her brother Ben, who go on an epic journey to save the world of magic and discover the secrets of their past. Lawn chairs, blankets and picnics welcome. Free, 8:30pm Friday; San Antonio Museum of Art, 200 W. Jones Ave., (210) 978-8100.

Spaceballs Main Plaza Conservancy and sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 17

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18 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

COMING SOON SPECIAL EVENT

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Comedy Central, Mind of Mencia

Aug 14-16

SPECIAL EVENT

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Laffapalooza Festival, Montreal’s Just for Laughs

August 20-23

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CALENDAR

SATX Pedal Power’s outdoor Cycle-In Cinema series continues with Mel Brooks ‘80s-era Star Wars spoof following a space bum (Bill Pullman) and his halfman half-dog co-pilot (John Candy) who get trapped in a desert world with the Druish Princess Vespa (Daphne Zuniga) and her robot chaperone Dot Matrix (Joan Rivers). Concessions will be available for purchase from Blue Star Ice House and El Oasis Café #2. Free, 8:45pm Thursday; Main Plaza, 115 N. Main Ave., (210) 225-9800.

Theater

27 Short Plays About Being Murdered in a Hotel by ABBA Promising “more

music than a play without music and surprisingly less music than a musical about playing competitive backgammon in Mumbai,” William M. Razavi’s ambitious new oddity imagines Swedish pop quartet ABBA on an absurd world tour-turned crime spree. $10-$14, 8pm FridaySaturday, The Overtime Theater, 1203 Camden St., (210) 557-7562.

Cuero, La Ruby Red y El Big Bird

Chicana theater artist Marisela Barrera has previously adapted works by Sandra Cisneros and Ana Castillo but turned inward for Cuero, La Ruby Red y El Big Bird — a three-act play developed from her own short stories. Inspired by recollections of her upbringing in the Rio Grande Valley, the production employs a cast of four — and live music by Azul Barrientos — to explore borderland memories of playground politics in Eagle Pass, Selena daydreams and Friday nights at McAllen’s Gaslight Club and a winged beast that haunts the Mexican ghost town of Guerrero Viejo. $8-$10, 8:30pm FridaySaturday; Jump-Start Performance Co., 710 Fredericksburg Rd., (210) 227-5867.

Grease Inspired by his time at Chicago’s

William Howard Taft, Jim Jacobs developed the risqué musical Grease with Warren Casey in 1971. In subsequent productions and the 1978 film, much of the play’s vulgarity was diluted; however, today those greasers still manage to tackle teen pregnancy, rebellion and gang violence with hipshaking style. Tony Ciaravino directs the Playhouse’s production. $12-$30, 8pm Friday, Saturday, 3pm Sunday; San Pedro Playhouse, 800 W. Ashby Pl., (210) 733-7258.

Special Events

Bid & Brunch The San Antonio AIDS

Foundation’s second annual Bid & Brunch features a web-enabled silent auction, live auctions for a variety of upscale items, live swing and jazz by Johnny P. and the Wiseguys and

a diverse buffet, plus a mimosa and bloody mary bar. $50, 10:30am-2:30pm Sunday; Red Oak Ballroom, 4522 Fredericksburg Rd., (210) 225-4715.

Kidcation Kick-Off The Witte helps kick

off Kidcation Week with a free event combining food, music, games, activities and information from businesses offering deals throughout the week. Free, 9am-noon Saturday; Witte Museum, 3801 Broadway, (210) 241-5441.

Rambling Rosé Becker Vineyards sets the

stage for an afternoon with rosé samples, a blind tasting with a panel of experts and tasty bites prepared by John Brand, executive chef of Hotel Emma. $25 at eventbrite.com, 1pm & 3pm Saturday; Becker Vineyards, 464 Becker Farms, Stonewall, (210) 822-9555.

Sistas in Business Celebration Sistas

in Business, Inc. was established in 2005 by Laura Thompson, a small business owner who had a vision to change the perception and opportunities for AfricanAmerican women business owners in San Antonio. The organization’s 10th annual celebration (August 4-7) includes a kick-off reception; a Founders Day Luncheon featuring actress Lynn Whitfield (Stepmom, Eve’s Bayou, The Josephine Baker Story); a breakfast with reality TV star Phaedra Parks (The Real Housewives Of Atlanta); free workshops; a Tech it Out Mixer; Sistas Networking on the Green Golf Tournament; and a Pink Black Bling Gala with HBO Def Poet Dana Gilmore. $60-$200, Wednesday-Friday; Wyndham San Antonio Riverwalk (111 E. Pecan St.); Second Baptist Community Church (3310 E. Commerce St.); Geekdom (131 Soledad St.); sistasinbusiness.com.

Vaquerocation In conjunction with

Kidcation Week, the Institute of Texan Cultures hosts a free day focusing on Texas frontier activities with craft tables, story time and cowboy docents. Free, noon-5pm Sunday; 801 E. César Chávez Blvd., (210) 458-2300.

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sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 19

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䴀愀礀㄀㌀ ⴀ ㄀㐀 20 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

ARTS

BRYAN RINDFUSS

PURO STYLE

The Hyper-Local Appeal Of SA’s BarbacoApparel ERIC MORENO

The trio of masterminds behind BarbacoApparel have built their brand by keying in to what makes San Antonio a unique spot. Every product that husband and wife duo Matt Contreras and Nydia Huizar — along with business partner and close friend Richard Diaz — create touches on those key elements: what it means to be a San Antonian, with a distinguishable Latino flavor. After starting out small, their products have slowly but surely gained a cult following. The trio sat down with the San Antonio Current to discuss the brand, the sometimes horrified reactions people have to some of their products (one in particular) and how people from Indiana don’t know what a bean and cheese taco is. So, first things first, what is BarbacoApparel all about? How would you describe your style and brand? Richard Diaz: I’d say we’re an apparel company for Texans and, more specifically, San Antonians. Definitely puro San Antonio, with also a touch of Texas, too. Matt Contreras: The initial idea was to have touristtype shirts, but the kind that only people from San Antonio would get. Most of our designs are throwbacks to our childhood. We’re Hispanic and we want to capture our heritage. We’re about Texas and San Antonio, so we’re just trying to have T-shirts that represent those kinds of aspects. Nydia Huizar: Yeah, we definitely try to incorporate a lot of nostalgia into our work. Because, you know, you can go to any store and find a T-shirt that you kind of like, but that doesn’t represent you on a personal level. As an example: our fideo art. I grew up eating that pretty much every single day. Having it as a print or as a T-shirt is kind of cool because this is my childhood. It tugs at the heartstrings. You guys use social media and e-commerce and you’re out at all the fairs and pop-up markets. Was that always the business model? MC: Yeah, I think from the beginning, to brand ourselves. In hindsight, it probably would have been better to wait a few months until we had our second line of shirts before we launched, but we really wanted to have a cohesive look and image to put forward from the beginning. I think that has really paid off, especially now as we’re getting a little bigger. RD: Yes, I agree, it was from the get-go. We knew that we had to go out and present our work to the locals. We

Ever feel like there’s not enough SA gear (other than the Spurs) to display your puro style? Then check out BarbacoApparel.

started finding ourselves in the local art community and going to any events we could find. What’s been the reaction at the fairs and markets and festivals? NH: So far, everyone has loved it. To date, I think there’s only been one person who’s been disgusted with our shirts (laughs). Pretty much everyone has responded well to them. Whether or not they have any first-hand experience with the products, like the fideo, they’re really excited to see these iconic images from San Antonio or their childhood on our products. MC: Unless you’re actually in the booth to see it happen, it’s kind of hard to describe. It’s really kind of magical. From our very first customer, this lady came up and immediately got the concept. To watch people walk by the booth, stop, come back and stare kind of wideeyed at the stuff is the best feeling in the world. The reception from the community has been nice.

Is there a favorite design at this point? Has there been one that has taken off more than another? RD: Yeah, I think we all have our one or two favorites and sometimes they’ll switch, especially if we’re excited about a new design. I’d say one of my favorites is the Donkey Lady or maybe the fideo. I’d say the bean and cheese is one of our most popular shirts right now. MC: I love the cow. I think that’s really the most unique interpretation of that type of design that we’ve seen. I think it’s a really good blend of Hispanic and Texas food culture. Bean and cheese, our calavera and the cow are our top three selling designs. We were doing a pop-up show this year and we had a guy from Indianapolis buy the bean and cheese shirt and then afterward asked me what it meant! CONTINUED ON PAGE 23 ►

sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 21

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(210) 824-5368 mcnayart.org 22 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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What’s the deal with your love of Randy Beamer? I know he has since come out and talked about his shirt. How did that come about? RD: Randy Beamer is the best! We would sometimes talk about him at work and say how we were fans of him on WOAI. He’s just got that charming character, and he’s funny. We knew he had a fan base and so we had to pay homage to him in SA. NH: I don’t want to say it’s an obsession since that word has a pretty negative connotation to it. I just think he’s iconic to San Antonio. With the whole nostalgia theme that we’ve tried to build into our brand, when I think of San Antonio and staple figures and imagery, he’s what comes to mind. MC: We were on SA Living the week of King William Fair and we débuted the new version of the shirt there and we left them one to give to him. And we were at King William and were packing up when he came up with his family and asked for Nydia by name! That was pretty awesome! I have to ask about the “Nolanda” print. It was pretty ballsy to put Yolanda Saldivar on a product to sell. What can you tell me about that and what has the reaction been to that design? MC: It’s probably the best design we have just to see the reaction people have from it. We knew we wanted to do a Selena shirt, but have a different angle on it. We eventually landed on that one. It’s great because people will look at it and then look at us and go, “Is that Yolanda?” (laughs). And when I tell them “yeah,” they’ll either be super excited about it and buy the cards or they’ll be disgusted by it! It’s pretty great. What are your ultimate goals for the business?

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SCREENS

A REBEL AND HIS BIKE

SA Is Barely A Blip In Pee-wee’s Big Adventure But We Still Claim It Three Decades Later KIKO MARTÍNEZ

One Saturday morning in 1985, an unknown director named Tim Burton rolled into San Antonio wearing Bermuda shorts and a pair of cowboy boots. He was there to shoot a couple of scenes for his début film, Pee-wee’s Big Adventure, which celebrates its 30th anniversary this month. Along with actor Paul Reubens, producer Bob Shapiro and director of photography Victor Kemper, the small crew spent a day downtown to shoot exterior shots at the Alamo. Afterward, they wanted to go shopping. “They shot their scenes and it was fairly short and uncomplicated,” Kathy Rhoads, former director of the San Antonio Film Commission in the 1980s, told the San Antonio Current. “After they were finished, they asked me to take them to the Lucchese Boot Factory, which was right down Houston Street at the time,” added Rhoads, who helped facilitate the Warner Bros. visit to SA. “They all ended up buying new boots.” Two short scenes from the Alamo footage actually made it in the final version of Big Adventure. The first was Pee-wee prancing happily toward the Alamo in search of his stolen bicycle. The second had him running out of the historic mission with a petrified look on his face after a tour guide tells him the Alamo does not have a basement. While San Antonio’s contribution to the film only lasts a total of about 20 seconds (the rest of the film was shot in California), you’d be hard-pressed to find a local movie buff or 30-something not claiming Big Adventure as a major highlight in San Antonio’s cinematic history. The Alamo City is not likely to be featured in Peewee’s new film, Pee-wee’s Big Holiday, which will hit Netflix exclusively in March 2016. Those behind the film are largely keeping cards close to their gray lapel when it comes to plot details, but that doesn’t bother super-fans like local graphic designer and educator John Medina. Pee-wee’s Big Adventure has given him enough memories to last a lifetime — he wouldn’t trade them for anything. “Whether it was the seedy, back-alley fortune teller, the murderous biker gang or the ghost of Large Marge, Pee-wee’s Big Adventure really illustrated the sorts of 24 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

anxieties and irrational fears I experienced as a kid when I didn’t really know how the world worked,” Medina, who opened an art and design studio in 2013 and named it Alamo Basement, told the Current. “I’ve seen the movie well over 100 times and it still takes me back to that place of innocence where things can seem kind of scary, but ultimately work out in the end,” he gushed. Local artist and lifelong Big Adventure lover Amanda Kirk was at a local screening of the film at Alamo Drafthouse Park North earlier this year dressed as the title character. She thinks the film, which was a favorite of hers growing up, holds up extremely well even after multiple viewings. It just doesn’t get old for her. “It has a voice all its own and is stuffed with so many jokes that I catch something new almost every time I

watch it,” Kirk said. “It’s campy, but sincere. I really feel like seeing it when I was little informed the things I liked as a teen and then as an adult. I don’t think that would have happened if the movie had been crass or cynical.” Long-time SA film critic Larry Ratliff, who started at the San Antonio Light in 1983, remembered Pee-wee’s Big Adventure as a “guilty pleasure” when he reviewed it when it came out three decades ago. “I probably gave it about three jalapeños when I saw it,” Ratliff said, referring to the review scale of 1-4 jalapeños for which he was famous as a critic. “It was silly fun. I think Pee-wee was very creative and a lot of that creativity carried into the movie.”

SCREENS

SOFT SPOT FOR SWEETNESS Elizabeth Daily On Dottie’s Infatuation With Pee-wee Herman

coming. I remember him being this really interesting, artsy guy who was very detailed about everything. I remember the sets were really cool. I had no idea [the movie] was going to be so huge. Dottie is pretty lovesick for Pee-wee in the movie. What do you think attracted her to him in the first place?

Pee-wee didn’t give her the time of day at the beginning of Big Adventure, but Dottie’s sweet disposition and all-around cuteness could not be ignored. Actress Elizabeth “E.G.” Daily portrayed the adorable bike shop employee in the 1985 comedy. The Current caught up with Daily, who has also been the voice behind the Rugrats’ Tommy Pickles since 1991 and talked about her relationship with Pee-wee and her take on drive-in theaters.

Well, he’s his own man. He’s very independent and determined and sweet. He’s an animal lover. He has his own style, which is sexy. I liked his bowtie and his shoes and the little wave on the front of his hair. I liked the whole package.

When you think back to shooting Pee-wee’s Big Adventure, what do you remember most about the production?

Why was he playing so hard to get?

I remember someone telling me there was this new director (Tim Burton) and he directed this short film about a dog (Frankenweenie) and that he was really up and

I think he was distracted by his priorities, like his bike. Sometimes girls aren’t the priority, although ultimately they become the priority.

LONGING FOR ETERNAL LOVE Diane Salinger On What Would Have Become Of Pee-wee’s Confidant

Actress Diane Salinger considers Pee-wee’s Big Adventure her favorite movie she’s acted in during her 30-year career. In the film, Salinger plays Simone, a truck-stop waitress and hopeless romantic who connects with Pee-wee on an emotional level while watching the sunrise from a T-Rex roadside attraction. In a phone interview with the Current last week from France (where she is shooting a new film on Joan of Arc), Salinger explained why she considers her role in Big Adventure a dramatic one and if she thinks Simone would still be looking for love in Paris today. What are some of your fondest memories of starring in Pee-wee’s Big Adventure? I remember the second audition, which was a call back the same day. I remember biting Paul [Reuben’s] hand. I was really coming on to him in the scene. (Laughs) He

was so shocked. My fondest memories were the scene at the diner and the one at the dinosaur. I remember having to be up at 4:30am to get on the bus to go to [Cabazon, California]. We had to act like it was a balmy summer night but it was about 30 or 40 degrees. Paul and I were freezing. What was it like on that day working inside the dinosaur? (Laughs) I remember Tim [Burton] asking me to lower my voice when I said, “Did you ever have a dream like that?” It was a wacky comedy, but I approached it as a drama. [Simone] just has this intense yearning and a dream and wanted to share it with Pee-wee. The movie is a lot deeper than people give it credit. Yes, there are so many levels to it. It’s the story of

When is the last time you went to the drive-in theater? Do you find them particularly romantic like Dottie does? Yeah, we just did this outdoor screening in our yard. It was set up like a drive-in. We had fire pits and people brought lawn chairs and blankets. There’s something super cozy about that — the elements of being outdoors and watching a movie and people near you. I think it’s super sexy and sweet. Does it surprise you that Paul Reubens can still pull off this character today at 62? No, it doesn’t surprise me. We might be getting older, but our spirit is the same. Maybe our wrinkles get a little deeper, but our characters and our energy are still the same. I don’t feel any older than when I played Dottie. For our full interview with Elizabeth Daily, visit sacurrent.com

the eternal boy. Everybody has that in them. I think that’s why the character is so beloved. I think most Americans have a sense of yearning to connect to just like Pee-wee. At the end of the film, we see you and your new boyfriend Pierre ready to go to Paris. Three decades later, do you think Simone would still be living there? (Laughs) I hope she stayed in Paris and married the love of her life. I think she’s kind of like Wendy from Peter Pan. Wendy finally grows up and Peter Pan, like Pee-wee, does not. She gets married and has a child of her own. I would hope Simone keeps her inner child very much intact but finds a man she can be happy with for the rest of her life. She says her dream is to live in the City of Eternal Love. She’s looking for love that lasts. For our full interview with Diane Salinger, visit sacurrent.com CONTINUED ON PAGE 26 ►

sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 25

SCREENS

◄ CONTINUED FROM PAGE 25

THE BICYCLE THIEF ‘Francis Buxton’ Reminisces About Riding Pee-wee’s Bike

Ivan Drago from Rocky IV might’ve been the toughest movie nemesis to hit the big screen in 1985, but pound-for-pound, no one can reach archenemy status quite like Francis Buxton (Mark Holton), the chubby, spoiled man-child who covets Pee-wee Herman’s bicycle in Pee-wee’s Big Adventure. The Current interviewed Holton for the 30th anniversary of the film. Did you get to ride the bike on set since we never see you ride it in the movie? I was on that damn bike three times! Two of those times I thought I was going to die. [Director] Tim [Burton] had me in a bear suit that was made from a real bear and incredibly heavy. I was on an elevated platform with a track the bike followed. To my left was a straight drop to a concrete floor. The weight was taking me over the edge. Two brave crew members grabbed

ALL ABOUT THAT BASEMENT Contrary To Popular Belief, There Are Two Lower Levels At The Alamo It comes as a crushing blow to Pee-wee Herman in Pee-wee’s Big Adventure when Tina, the Alamo tour guide (the late Jan Hooks), delivered six devastating words that brought the journey to find his bike to a complete standstill. “There’s no basement at the Alamo,” Tina tells him, chuckling before the rest of the tour group joined in to mock an embarrassed Pee-wee. Tina was correct. The Alamo doesn’t have a basement — it actually has two. That’s the case now, at least. “One is underneath the gift shop of the visitor’s center,” said Becky Dinnin, director of the Alamo, who has held the position since February. “The other is underneath Alamo Hall, which is now used as a reception venue that we rent out.” 26 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

me. If they hadn’t, it would have been ugly. The second time, I was rigged with wires to a telescoping crane. The crane would rocket me up. Sheer terror! I would then be lowered screaming obscenities much to delight of [cowriter and actor] Phil Hartman, who would dissolve into laughter. How much underwater wrestling did you actually have to do with Pee-wee during your bathtub scene? Also, why does Francis bathe in swim shorts? The underwater shots didn’t take that long. We just rolled as I screamed under water. What you don’t see on film are the miles of electrical cables and boxes outside the pool. When my butler, Professor Tanaka, dove in, great waves of water crashed down on the cables. When you are standing barefoot in water with electrical cables around your feet, it’s a little frightening. Why does Francis wear swim shorts? Well, the Buxtons are a very modest family.

In the basement below the gift shop, which was added at least four years after Pee-wee came up empty in his search, there is an employee break room, restrooms, storage areas for gift shop items, staff lockers and a resource library for tour guides. During a tour of the basement last week, Dinnin showed the Current a room where fudge is made to sell in the gift shop above. Boxes of Mexican dark chocolate and pecan praline line the hallway. Pee-wee Herman himself was given the same tour in 2011 when he visited San Antonio to shoot an episode of Top Chef. The Current wasn’t given access to the basement under Alamo Hall, but Dinnin assured us there are no bicycles down there — just a place to store paperwork and old records. Alamo Hall used to be a fire station, which came under state control in the late 1930s. Details on the building are hard to come by. Madam Ruby was lying to Pee-wee when she told him his beloved bicycle was in the Alamo basement, but sending him on a wild goose chase in San Antonio to search inside the lower levels of the mission probably shouldn’t have ended in so much humiliation. What would an official Alamo tour guide tell a visitor if he or she asked to see the basement today? “Neither basement can be accessed by the public,” Dinnin said. “It’s not very magical down here anyway.”

Did you get to keep anything from the set? Your customized baby blue jumpsuit, perhaps? I have one of Paul Reubens’ cheese sandwiches in my freezer. It’s probably time to list it on eBay. You have a scene at the end of the film with the late Hartman. What was it like to work with him? Phil was on the set most of the time and my time with him was filled with laughter. We fed off each other and I knew how extremely gifted and talented he was on many levels before the rest of the world did. He had an endless list of great ideas and characters. I miss him. What do you think Francis Buxton would be doing today? A life sentence for a series of white-collar crimes. For our full interview with Mark Holton, visit sacurrent.com

CONTINUED ON PAGE 29 ►

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SCREENS

IN MEMORIAM We Remember 12 Big Adventure Actors That Have Passed Away

◄ CONTINUED FROM PAGE 26

Tina the Alamo tour guide annoys Pee-wee with her ongoing Texas history lesson and gum mastication, but her sunny disposition and Southern drawl make it a memorable character for Hooks, who went on to star on Saturday Night Live the following year. Hooks died last year at 57 from cancer. “She was really great in [Pee-wee’s Big Adventure],” SNL alum and ex-boyfriend Kevin Nealon told the San Antonio Current when Hooks died in October. “I don’t think anyone will run into someone like her again. She was one of a kind.” Phil Hartman (Reporter) Without actor/writer Hartman, there would be no Peewee Herman. He co-created the character with star Paul Reubens during their time in the improv comedy troupe The Groundlings in the late ’70s. Hartman has a cameo in Big Adventure as a reporter interviewing character Francis Buxton in the final scene at the drive-in. In May 1998, he was shot and killed by his wife while he slept. He was 49. Alice Nunn (Large Marge) Along with the clown surgeon scene, Nunn’s character Large Marge, a ghostly truck driver who gives Peewee a lift, provides the biggest scare of the movie via stop-motion animation. Nunn was 60 when she passed away in 1988 following a heart attack. Jon Harris (Andy) As Simone’s jealous and gargantuan boyfriend Andy, the

seven-foot-plus Harris, who also wrestled professionally, chased Pee-wee around rodeo grounds before coming face to face with an angry bull. Harris died in 2005 at 52. ▲ Ed Herlihy (Mr. Buxton) Mr. Buxton was none too pleased when Pee-wee broke into his mansion and accused his son Francis of stealing his bike. Pee-wee gets his revenge by giving the upset dad a stick of spicy gum. Herlihy, who was the announcer on The Jack Parr Tonight Show, died of natural causes in 1999 at 89. ▲ Toru Tanaka (Butler) Pee-wee pulls a fast one on the Buxton family’s butler when he knocks on the mansion door looking for Francis. He later makes a big splash in Francis’ bathwater. Tanaka, who also played Subzero in The Running Man, passed away at 70 in 2000 from heart failure. ▲ Carmen Flipi (Hobo Joe) His rendition of “Jimmy Crack Corn” puts Pee-wee over the edge and sends him jumping off a moving train. Luckily for Pee-wee, he ends up landing right where he wanted — in San Antonio. Flipi, who also had small parts in Burton’s films Beetlejuice and Ed Wood, died in 2003 from cancer-related illnesses at 80. ▲ Simmy Bow (Man in Diner) After Pee-wee tells the diner full of patrons, “Large Marge sent me,” this unnamed man in the diner explains to him that Large Marge had died a decade ago. Bow died in 1987 at 66 from complications from

a stroke. His last film was Burton’s Beetlejuice, in which he played a deceased janitor. ▲ Luis Contreras (Biker #2) This biker with an eye patch suggests his gang, Satan’s Helpers, stab, tattoo, hang, then kill Peewee after he knocks over all their motorcycles outside the biker bar. Later, Biker #2 wishes Peewee good luck in finding his bike after he impresses them with his dancing. Contreras died of cancer in 2004 at 53. ▲ Irving Hellman (Mr. Crowtray) Only a friendly neighbor would let Pee-wee water his lawn with such a crazy sprinkler. Hellman died in 2000 at 87. ▲ Mark Everett (BMX Kid) He was one of the seven BMX bikers in Chuck’s Bike-O-Rama when Pee-wee comes in to pick up his horn from Dottie. He delivers the line, “Sure is gettin’ hot in here,” when Dottie tells Pee-wee hello. Born Manuel Benitez, Everett was killed in 2008 at 39 after a gun battle with police in a Chinese restaurant in California. Milton Berle (himself) The iconic actor unknowingly helps Pee-wee sneak onto the Warner Bros. lot when Pee-wee walks with Berle’s entourage as they laugh at his jokes. Known as “Mr. Television” during TV’s Golden Age, Berle died of cancer in 2002 at 93.

sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 29

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Emma Stone and Joaquin Phoenix star in Woody Allen’s latest cinematic offiering.

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Pleasant Surprises In Woody Allen’s Irrational Man DAN HUDAK

Sometimes the less you know about a movie, the better. The trailer for Irrational Man is terrible because it makes the movie look dull and, aside from serving as writer/director, Woody Allen’s latest film starring Joaquin Phoenix and Emma Stone offers little reason to pay to see it. There’s a reason it feels uninspired and this is what also makes the trailer kind of brilliant: It holds back on a major plot development that drives the latter two-thirds of the film and in so doing, it allows a plot twist to work with wonderful ingenuity. Ideally, the marketing department would’ve found a way to better entice viewers without giving too much away (as far too many trailers do), so it’ll be interesting to see if people give this a chance. Since trailers don’t reveal what this movie is really about, I’ll hold back as well. What you need to know is Irrational Man isn’t just a bland story that follows depressed philosophy professor Abe Lucas (Phoenix) and the two women, one a student (Stone) and one a colleague (Parker Posey), who occupy his time while teaching summer school at a Brown-esque university in Rhode Island. There’s much more complexity and morality to it than this and it’s better because of it. Irrational Man hits on the familiar Allen tropes of existentialism, infidelity, paranoia and the complexities of love. It’s

also very intellectual: If Midnight In Paris was Allen’s love letter to literature, this is his love letter to philosophy. However, a key difference is that familiarity with literature greatly improved one’s viewing experience of Paris, whereas here ample philosophical references enhance the film for anyone. Allen uses philosophy to suit his purposes — he doesn’t allow it to drive the ship the way literary figures drove parts of Paris. Is Irrational Man funny? At times, yes. But this is more Crimes and Misdemeanors and Match Point than it is Bananas or Annie Hall. Regardless of the type of movie, Allen’s ability to find truth in uncomfortable places has always been one of his best qualities as a writer and director and he’s in top form here. We’re given Abe’s background and learn of his struggle to save the world and therefore understand why he’d be so disillusioned. We completely get how Stone’s young and ambitious student would be attracted to Abe even though he has so little going for him. After reading this review, do yourself a favor and don’t watch or read anything else about Irrational Man until you see the film. You’ll thank me later.

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Over the years, I’ve probably given bar owner Danny Delgado more money than I have to all my landlords combined. Behind inspired, rowdy spots like Hi-Tones, Faust and Phantom Room, Delgado has a magic formula for making his joints come alive — an equation of dangerously cheap drinks, understated décor and a no-line, smother-the-bartop policy that rewards a townie’s knowledge (or at least repeat visits). So, teaming up with the green thumb of chef Rebel Mariposa (née Rebecca Lopez) for La Botánica has been a blessing for the vegans and vegetable-minded in San Antonio. Inside the Tiffany-blue building, a vibrant, short menu of vegan eats and a full bar awaits the man-bunned, the drop-crotched and whatever else substitutes for fashionable these days. Mariposa made her name around town as the head of Rebel Eats, a catering, educational and events collective finding power in “plant-based” food. At La Botánica, Mariposa has found a commercial outlet while maintaining the creativity of the Rebel Eats mission. The restaurant serves each dish on a bed of banana leaves, a refreshing presentation. The small, revolving menu of items $10 or less suggests a refusal to stay still, as does Mariposa herself. Each time I visited, she’s on the hustle. With the kitchen open until almost 2 a.m., I can’t imagine she has too much time to sleep anymore, though that hasn’t had any impact on the spot’s countenance. La Botánica’s Mexican theme definitely lends itself to meatlessness — too often, vegetarian options suffer from comparing the veracity of a tofu substitute to a fish and chips combo. Still, this restaurant can fake it quite well. Their ceviche Huehuecoyotl is a delight, with lime-marinated oyster mushrooms and hearts of palm

There’s no need for fish in La Botánica’s ceviche.

delivering the weight of the meal. Plump grape tomatoes and garnishes of red onion and avocado seal the item’s status at the top of the menu. For those frustrated by veggie fare, coming away hungry from meatless dinners, try the lightly fried empanadas. Out of four empanada renditions, I tried the papas version, a dish that would be lost without its sweet, oniony salsa. Basking in a sweet, fried glow, the three creamy, stuffed bites paired well with the side of no-frills frijoles negros. Despite the plants-only policy, La Botánica participates in the San Antonio tradition of Sunday-only barbacoa. The dish is crafted from jackfruit, Earth’s largest tree fruit. Native to Southeast Asia, the monstrous thing can weight up to 100 pounds and looks something like a perforated, oversized pear. Served in three flour tortillas and loaded with black beans, avocado and lively roasted salsa, your local taco house may be in danger of losing your weekend patronage. On the side, small cubes of watermelon and chili salt add to the lightness of the meal — a claim that traditional barbacoa could never make. So far, none of La Botánica dishes I’ve encountered have had much spice. With great restraint, Mariposa seems to be interested in letting the veggies speak for themselves. But if

you’re craving some kick, there’s a little table by the bar that offers all the hot sauces your tongue can handle. Or, better yet, try the Tequila Piña, one of the bar’s signature $7.50 cocktails. With jalapeño muddled directly in the tequila, the pineapple drink hits pretty hard if you don’t ask the bartender to hold back on spice. Weeknights are a great time to eat your vegetables, sip on a cocktail or one of 20 beer options and enjoy the peculiarities on the wall. In low light and bright paint, La Botánica observes the occult-ish, faithhealing onda of the stores from which it take its name. With loads of incense, cacti accents, odd-shaped empty bottles and loads of novena candles, La Botanica makes a solid Mexican goods store look like an airport tourist shop. On weekends, it’s a little more packed. In the dirty red neon glow over the patio, people danced to “El Chico Del Apartamento 512,” loud enough to drown out the dad rock coming from across the street. With Lone Star and Pearl at a cool $2, nighttime is the right time to recall that this is, in part, a Delgado operation, where the light is neon, the cheap are drinks and the music is good. mstieb@sacurrent.com

La Botánica 2911 N. St. Mary’s St., (619) 886-2594, vivalabotanica.com Skinny: Mexican-inspired vegan eats with late-night options and a full bar. Best Bets: Ceviche Huehuecoyotl, barbacoa tacos (Sunday only), Tequila Piña Hours: 4pm-2am Tues-Sun Price: $8-$10

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FOOD

FELICIA DEINNOCENTIIS

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If you’re willing to make the drive out to Helotes, Gable’s Ice Cream Sliders is sure to reward you with old-fashioned frozen treats to cool you from that unforgiving afternoon sun. Founder and owner Donnie Guill opened Gable’s in December 2014, in part because of his life-long sweet tooth and as a tribute to his father, Gable. “He was a soda jerk for a while, since he was 19 years old, so when we opened, we decided it’d be nice to name it after him,” Guill said. Gable’s signature sliders include your choice of two cookies and a scoop of ice cream. You also have your choice of crunchy Rice Krispies or a house-favorite Fruity Pebbles disc instead for no extra cost. With 13 cookies (all made in-house) and 16 ice cream flavors, there are over 1,000 combinations to try, each under $3. “We try to keep our prices really low. I try to keep them as low as I could because I think when you take your family out to many places like the froyo places, especially the ones where they weigh it, it ends up being $6 or $7 dollars for a cup. And so here two people can eat for that,” Guill said. Even though the store sells a delicious product, Gable’s had a

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slow growth due to an abnormally wet spring and April’s Blue Bell Ice Cream recall. “I was doing exclusive Blue Bell ice cream because it’s a good quality product, good flavor, good consistency and everything and they deliver two times a week, so it was really easy for me to maintain that,” she said. “Then when [the recall] happened, I had to scramble and do it through a grocery supplier.” It has been a scramblin’ struggle since then, one which she has made work for the most part: “So I have a mismatch of flavors and brands but I’ve tried to sample everything before I brought it in the be sure it has good taste.” As you walk into the store, you find contributions by members of the Guill family dotted throughout the space. Guill’s son is a graphic designer who created the store’s logo and color scheme, while his daughter is an interior decorator who envisioned the layout. On the walls are black and white photos of grandchildren and family members, making the lobby feel warm and homey. Whether you prefer a slider, a hot fudgy brownie with bacon or just a snow cone, add a drive out to Gable’s to your must-do list.

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sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 35

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36 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

FOOD

CULINARY CALENDAR

6 Ways To Get Your Drink/Grub On This Week JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Wednesday, August 5 Pop’N Plates: Dinner at Rosella Coffee Co. means dining with some of the city’s best and upcoming talent. Robbie Nowlin’s turn at the kitchen ends Saturday, so you have three more days to enjoy the chef’s charcuterie plate, pork belly/foie gras steamed buns, heirloom tomato salad, ahi tuna tartare and caramelized white chocolate custard. Nowlin will be followed by Josh Cross of Toro Taco Bar, Luis Colon of Folc and others. $7-$25, starting at 4 p.m. daily, 203 E. Jones Ave., Suite 101, (210) 277-8574, rosellacoffee.com.

Expires 08/12/2015

There’s more than just great toast at Rosella.

Hatch 20th Anniversary Festival: You won’t be able to avoid the smoky, peppery scent wafting throughout all of Central Market for the next 14 days. Learn ways to smoke, store and freeze these popular peppers straight from the chile capital of the world. The festival will feature cooking lessons from New Mexico’s most celebrated chefs, including a “Hatch Chiles & Gruet Sparkling Wine” class with chef instructor Marc Quiñones of Inn & Spa at Loretto, Santa Fe. $65, August 10. Festival runs through August 18, 4821 Broadway St., (210) 368-8600, centralmarket.com. Friday, August 7 Yappy Hour: Pups need plenty of socializing, too. Take your pooch to The Hangar Bar & Grill’s dog park and donate to San Antonio Pets Alive!, which will earn you discounts on your bill. Patrons who donate up to $20 to the organization will receive 20 percent off their tab. Don’t have a canine companion? SAPA will have your future best friend available for adoption on site. Free admission, 3-7pm, 8203 Broadway St., (210) 824-2700, facebook.com/thehangarsa. Saturday, August 8 Open House: Branchline Brewing opens its doors but once a month for about three hours to showcase new small batch brews, summer seasonals and their operations. Don’t forget to pack a lawn chair and your Branchline pint glass for free admission. $10 gets you a limited edition Shady Oak pint and three beer tickets, 4-7pm, 3633 Metro Pkwy., (210) 403-2097, facebook.com/branchlinebrewing. Oktoberfest Release: Germany’s Oktoberfest might not start until late September, but you can start imbibing Pedernales Brewing’s take brewed in Fredericksburg. Prices vary, noon, Pedernales Brewing Company, 97 Hitchin’ Post Trail, Fredericksburg, (830) 998-7486, facebook.com/pedernalesbrewingco. Wednesday, August 12 Salud! Culinary Nights: The Witte Museum will welcome chefs Stephen Paprocki and Ernest Lopez. The chefs will join Dr. Harry Schafer, the museum’s curator of archeology, as well as Meghan Curry, founder of Bug Vivant, in educating attendees on the nutritional benefits of eating insects. Food will be paired with beers from Karbach Brewery. $50 for nonmembers, $45 for members, 6:30-8:30pm, 3801 Broadway St., (210) 357-1900, wittemuseum.org. sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 37

Charlie Brown’s Neighborhood Bar & Grill

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38 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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FOOD

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JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

August is here (when did that happen?) and with it are several openings for more eateries and bars. To start things off, the team behind Feast (1024 S. Alamo St.) opened Haunt inside the St. Anthony (300 E. Travis St., 210-215-3808), a new spiritfocused venue with swanky lighting and posh seating areas. We’re getting more pizza via Russo’s. The hotel, now part of the Luxury Collection Hotels, was recently featured in ABC’s The Bachelorette and has been actively working on a new image. Haunt, brought to you by Andrew Goodman, will be joined by dining concept Rebelle later this year. Blue Star Provisions (1414 S. Alamo, Suite 103, 210-212-5506) has added a much-needed pantry to the Blue Star Arts Complex. Still under a soft opening stage, the shop features soaps, pastries, roasted chicken, local produce out of Johnson’s Backyard Garden, olive oil, a bulk section, a growler station, and Element Kombucha on tap (brewed out of Alchemy Kombucha and Culture). Smoothies and cold-press juices are on the way. Hours: 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Monday-Saturday; 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Sunday.

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Chuck Hernandez’s dream of opening a healthy eatery in the heart of downtown is about to become a reality as O’liva Healthy Cuisine & Tasting Room (115 Plaza De Armas #107, 210-229-2638) readies for a weekend soft opening under the direction of Chris Cook. The eatery will carry boxed to-go lunches and other goods while also aiming to educate downtown denizens on olive oil, local wine and beer, along with healthy eating. Over on the city’s Northside, Russo’s Coal-Fired Italian Kitchen (17631 La Cantera Pkwy., 210-561-7616) opened this weekend with lunch and dinner. Headquartered in Houston, Russo’s serves pizza, calzones, baked pastas, handmade meatballs and more out of its huge 3,500-square-foot space. Do you want to bottle salsa? Are you trying to develop an app that would make Yelp go away once and for all? Break Fast & Launch can help. The culinary business accelerator developed by Café Commerce is now taking applications for its third cohort. The group will focus on the ins and outs of food tech and food product from labeling to marketing and then some. Fill out your application at f6s.com/ breakfastlaunch. Pencil this in your calendars, food lovers. Culinaria’s expanded Restaurant Week returns August 15 through 29. The list of restaurants is still growing — find the roster at culinariasa.org. Finally, if you missed out the amazing event that was Night At The Doseum ReDo Recess, the venue will host another adult-only party with booze and snacks on September 18. flavor@sacurrent.com

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11AM-10PM • 6462 N New Braunfels • 210-997-0193 • flairmexicanstreetfood.com sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 39

AGED TO PERFECTION MEETS GRILLED TO PERFECTION PRESENTED BY

Congratulations to.. The Lost Bar

The Chubby Melt: Two grilled cheese sandwiches on sourdough, married by a half-pound Angus patty with chipotle aioli, grilled mushrooms and onions

12730 NW Military, Ste 110 San Antonio, TX 78231 40 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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NIGHTLIFE

SWANKY DRINKIN’ La Cantera Hill Country Resort Is The Patio You Never Knew You Needed JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Until a few months ago, I had no reason to drive into La Cantera Hill Country Resort. Even after spending more than five years living across the way off UTSA Boulevard, there was no valid reason for me to make the trek up that steep road in my former hooptie (the shape my car was in alone would have made it nearly impossible to even get there). Built in 1999, a Westin property for most of its existence, the resort closed down in November 2014 as new ownership prepared an extensive makeover that would help the hotel compete with other resorts in town. Doors reopened in March, with a slow trickle of guests, but the pools weren’t open yet. I was lured in for a hardhat tour of the nine new dining concepts of varying degrees of swankiness, many of which were still under construction (hence the hat) in April. Now, several months later, the vision is complete and it’s quite awe-inspiring. Thankfully, the new restaurant and bar options aren’t limited to hotel guests (the pools are so don’t even think about it). But don’t let your first foray into the resort be a mediocre one, and if anything, take advantage of the luxe bar spaces. Here’s a quick run-down of what to drink, eat and avoid within your trip. Do Take Advantage Of Those Views: Other than probably the Tower of the Americas (which you couldn’t pay me to visit considering the elevator craps out far too often for my comfort), the resort is one of the few places where you can lord over SA’s landscape. Soak it in as you drive up or just stay outdoors and take down some vino on the City View Terrace, open Thursday, Friday and Saturday for the Six Flags Fiesta Texas fireworks show from 7:30 to 9:30 p.m. Don’t Miss Sire: This mini bar-crawl should feel like a staycation. Once inside the lobby, hook a left before Plaza San Saba (more on this later) and pretend you’ve been whisked away. The bar is located next to Bocado, a window shop where you can find charcuterie and cheese boards on weekends. As the resort’s occupancy increases to 100 percent, the bar, filled with rich brown wooden paneling and club-style lounge seating, has served as a starting point for guests ready to party and relax. Start your night out with a Ginger Rogers, a dainty cocktail of sparkling wine, Domaine de Canton ginger

If for no other reason, the trek north to La Cantera Hill Country Resort is worth it for impeccable bar Sire.

liqueur, pear puree, lemon juice and ginger-citrus foam. Whiskey lovers will enjoy the Bourbon Basket, a sweet drink with aged bourbon, pear brandy, apple and lemon juice and agave nectar. My only quibble was the lack of large format ice, which would have made this drink go down a whole lot smoother. Take it to go and head straight out the doors to the patio. Do Chill On San Saba: Were I more industrious, my patio would serve as a refuge from the hot summer days and I’d make sure every seating area was comfy and cool. Well, I’m not. But therein lies San Saba’s appeal (well, other than the pool). There are about 90 (I’m being facetious, but there’s definitely a lot) different patio furniture sets to choose from and almost as many water features. Pick one, or hop around like we did. Don’t Forget The Cigars: Guilty. And they’re only sold at the golf clubhouse, so make note of that. Do Visit Zach Garza: There are a few chefs in town

that just get it, whatever it is. At Primero Cantina located next to the resort’s giant pools, Garza (most recently with Johnny Hernandez’s The Frutería) understands what folks want out of pool snacks. The guac topped with seasonal fruit — peaches during our visit — was hearty and fresh; the queso fundido, fired up with a bit of mezcal, was a favorite, while the beer can fried chicken wings with a guajillo and ancho barbecue sauce are reason enough to go, but don’t pass the ceviche mixto, a citrusy number with halved cherries that made us wonder why we haven’t been tossing cherries into ceviches earlier. And we’ll take a full serving of the cucumber-lime granita palate cleanser that came along with it to go, please. On the drink front, there are patio-pounders to be had such as the Setting Sun Sangria, another sweet drink with white wine, fresh fruit, white peach puree, sparkling wine and then some. Too sun-drunk to pick? Go for the surprise Beer in a Bag option ($2.95). It was probably the most excited I’ve been to see a Corona in a while. flavor@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 41

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NIGHTLIFE

BOTTLE & TAP

Sandals And Stones: SA’s Breweries Tapping LANCE HIGDON Into Booming Industry It was in the pages of this very mag two Augusts ago that Busted Sandal and 5 Stones breweries had their meet-cute with San Anto beer lovers. Their profiles have stayed distinct, but they’ve both parlayed those craft crushes into brew romance, with expanded facilities and extended menus in the works for each. I caught up with Busted Sandal’s Michael DiCicco and 5 Stones’ Seth Find out what else is in the works for Busted Sandal. Weatherly last week to talk about upcoming collaborations, bigger hibiscus-and-orange editions will be barrel systems and what’s in store for available for the night. their biennial bashes. At 5 Stones you’ll find a slightly Busted Sandal’s second anniversary smaller crowd of 300 to 400 campertakes place from 1 to 10 p.m. on chair-toting revelers, but they’ve got Saturday, August 15. DiCicco puts the equally killer plans. According to guest list at around 800, with Busted Weatherly, the shindig will feature a Sandal fans driving in from all around number of cask tappings and new the state. Head brewer Jeff Kuhle and releases, including his first foray into his crew have prepped some special wild-sour territory. Slider Provider is party favors, from a batch of Slippery driving up to cater and there’s talk Rock IPA that spent the past year in a of procuring a big band to entice wine barrel to the oak/rum/vanilla-aged tipsy jitterbugs to dance. Though ale Lafitte’s Reserve (though the latter late-breaking logistical issues have is reserved for those prudent souls who pushed the date from August 9 to an already purchased VIP tickets). Winner undisclosed date in September, the Winner Chicken Dinner and Perico’s party shall go on. will be on hand to handle meals, with Like most 2-year-olds, both breweries Kenny’s Nuts and San Antonio Brinery have experienced growing pains. Busted holding it down for the peanuts and Sandal hit capacity back in February, pickles. which prompted the purchase of nine Funk-focused cover band Finding additional 20-barrel fermenters and the Friday is the musical headliner and expansion of about 1,900 square feet Busted Sandal will be previewing its to the brewery itself. Outfitted with the forthcoming colla-beer-ation with the extra tanks and a gleaming new canning group, the aptly named Finding Friday line, DiCicco expects production to Mexican Lager. The collab grew out of a triple by the end of 2015. Weatherly, too, longstanding relationship between band is looking to move to bigger digs by 5 and brewery — guitarist James Garcia Stones’ next anniversary. runs a music studio which neighbors As River City’s beer profile continues Busted Sandal’s brewing space — and to rise, it’s good to have guys like these though FFML won’t be hitting draftlines to keep the love alive. until October, both the regular and a Stay faithful, SA.

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sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 43

Happy Hours Downtown Central

Happy Hour of the Week

The Local Bar

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Kimura

Happy hour monday - friday 4-7 Saturday 12-4 $6 Kimura Cocktails, $5 House Wines $4 Bottled Beer, $6 Draft Beer $3-$4 Appetizers, $6 Miso Ramen

Sancho’s Cantina & Cocina

Luna Rosa

2603 S. E Military HH:; 3-7pm $5 Tapaas, $4 sangria, $3 Guavarita

4- 7pm Every Day Frozen Margs:$2.25, Well Drinks: $3.25 Select Cans: $2.50 Monday through Wednesday: Reverse Happy Hour 9-11pm 628 Jackson St, San Antonio, TX 78212 (210) 320-1840

The Bar

Epic Bar

100 Villita St. Monday-Friday 3PM-7PM $4 Well Drinks, $1 Off all Draught Beers, $5 Select Cocktails, $3 Spicy Tequila Infusion, $5 Sweet Potato Cinnamon Infused Irish Whiskey

Broadway 5050

210.832.0050 Mon-Fri 3-7pm $2 wells, $2 Millter Lite, $2 Coors Light Mon- $2 off wine, $1 off all bottles/cans Tues- Pint Night! Weds- Karoake Night: $3 wells, $5 mules Thurs- Texas Thursday! Ask for specials Fri- Bartender’s Choice Sat- $3 wells, $4 Fireball Sun- Industry Night: $3.50 Jameson Brunch Sat/ Sun- $2 Mimosas, $3 Bloodys

Club Sirius

DrinkSirius.com • @ClubSirius HH Daily Noon-8pm: $2 Wells, $2 Domestic 16oz Cans/Pints, $3 Jager

44 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

On The Rocks Pub

210-467-5565 1375 Austin Hwy, San Antonio Monday: Poker Night Tuesday: Karaoke Night Wednesday: Ladies Night Thursday: Live Music Friday: Live Tejano Night Saturday: Video DJ Sunday: Jam Session

My Friends Backyard Sports Bar 442 W Hildebrand NOW OPEN AT 4PM! Daily Happy Hour Specials 4-7pm Check out our Facebook and Instagram

Flair Mexican Street Food

6462 N. New Braunfels Ave. 78209 Flairmexicanstreetfood.com HH Tuesday-Friday 3-6p $4 Craft Draughts $3 Off Cocktails and Wine $6 Michelada All Day, Everyday!

Northwest The Leaky Barrel

Raffles

Smitty’s Pub

Highlander Bar & Grill

HH 2p-8p $2 Tecate & Heineken $2.25 Domestic Drafts $2.50 Wells $3 Long Necks & More Daily Specials

$2.50 Domestic long necks $2.75 well drinks everyday 2pm - 8pm

Wurzbach Ice House

HH: 4- 8pm Home of the $2.50 Well Drink! $2 Domestic Draft $3 Import Draft, Daily specials 8 till close

1039 NE Loop 410 210.826.7118 HH 11a-6p Tuesday-Friday & 9p-11p Tues.Thurs. Daily Lunch Specials 11a-3p Closed Mondays Mon-Sat: 7am - 4pm $3.25 Import Drafts & Mini Margaritas $2.75 Domestic Drafts Tue- $3.25 Mini Hurricanes Thu- $3.25 Premium Vodka Specials Sun- $.75 Wings & $3 Sunday Specials 4-8pm: $1 off mixed drinks & appetizers!

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North Central Slackers

Sports-Drinks-Arcade SlackerSA.com • $2.50 Domestics, $3 Wells Daily, $3 You Call It

Michin Mexican Kitchen

7pm - 9pm On the Patio. $5 House Margaritas, $2.50 Domestic Bottles, Tecate & Dos XX, $3 Indo and Bohemia, and Mexican Draft $4. 427 N Loop 1604, Ste 202, SATX 78258 Behind Trader Joe’s

Northeast Charlie Brown’s Neighborhood Bar & Grill

Charlie-Browns.com • 210-496-7092 Mon.-Fri. until 7pm $2.75 well drinks, $8.00 domestic pitchers $2.75 domestic longnecks Mon.-Fri. 2-6pm 60¢ Wings

Da Bunker

Daily Happy Hour Specials: Mon. $2 PBR, $2.50 Cuervo Tues. $2 Domestic Longnecks Wed. 2.50 Wells, $2 Fireballs Thurs. All Day Happy Hour! Fri. $3 XX, $3.50 Jack Daniels Sat. $1 Jello Shots Sun. All Day Happy Hour!

Beer Goggles

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Open 7 Days A Week • Mon-Fri: 2p-2A • Sat-Sun 11Am • slackerssa.com 46 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

MATT STIEB

SHIRT ON YOUR BACK How A $20 Tee Can Keep A Band Afloat In The Sinking Music Economy MATT STIEB/@MATTHEWSTIEB

Sure, the aggregate pennies from Vevo and Spotify streams ensure that UMG, Rihanna and the big-wig labels are going to stay in their mansions. And the vinyl revival may ensure that Jack White or James Murphy — or some other white guy with a mainstream cool band — makes his money. But for the working musician, still shackled to the day job, there are very few outlets for bands to get into the black, or, at least not to lose money off their creative ventures. In an era where music sales no longer cut it as a viable revenue source, the T-shirt, that staple of the American wardrobe, can provide a business-minded musician with an opportunity to subsidize recording and touring costs. First made popular by American sailors coming home from the Spanish-American War, the T-shirt grew over the 20th century to become a huge economic mover. It’s hard to find updated figures for an industry with so many players, but, according to clothing industry website Impressions, to give you at least a rough idea, Americans spent about $40 billion on “decorated apparel” in 2008. The simplest way to get a tee on the merch table is the screen-printed shirt. Offered by several companies in town, a silk screen works essentially as a stencil, pressing ink onto cloth so that only the desired image makes its way to the shirt. The silkscreen rewards simplicity, with multi-colored shirts requiring more screens and ink. “So that’s why you’ll see a lot of band T-shirts that are one color, super simple drawings,” said Mike Garcia, who silk-screens for Die Happy, a local music promoter. Jerrid Morris, songwriter of Texas bluesmen El Campo, found that the band’s Alamo-inspired tees helped get their album Remember pressed and packaged on vinyl. T-shirt sales “worked way better than we thought it would,” noted Morris. “I’ve always been a proponent of having a visually appealing shirt because it does well. We got this one — I forget how many we ordered — but we sold out really quickly. That was the bulk of the money that allowed us to put out the record.” Now that the album is out, El Campo is still able to make more dough off tees than their actual music.

SA bands barely scraping a living turn to making and selling T-shirts for some gas money.

“Maybe it’s just a matter of feeling okay about selling a T-shirt for $20; especially if it’s American Apparel, people will pay that,” said Morris. “It’s easier to market them something tangible, even if they’re not going to use it. It’s just a giant poster.” D.T. Buffkin, a San Antonio Current contributor and leader of his self-titled Tin Pan-style band, graciously allowed us a peek into his band’s finances. For his début album, Tattoed Rose, Buffkin pressed 300 records, the factory minimum. “All told with shipping, with color labels and a single black and white insert, it ran about $2,300,” he estimated. “Once you break all the math down, I think I worked it out to where each record cost me about $7.80. Selling them for $15, I’m still making almost 100 percent profit.” For the merch, Buffkin threw down $870 for 100 American Apparel shirts, breaking down to $8.70 each. Though the per-unit profit on the album was greater than the shirt, the vinyl cost does not account for the staggering amount of time invested in writing and recording, or the cost of recording and mastering, if you don’t have the DIY infrastructure or wherewithal. Buffkin also raises a good point about capital, a long shot for most musicians. “The issue is to have the $2,300 in the first place is

always difficult for musicians usually unless your mom is paying for it or something like that,” he said. “The hardest part is having your money up front and then making it back slowly.” A level up, in the ecosystem of small labels, the T-shirt’s imperative begins to change. Speaking with Texas Is Funny label head Scott Andreu, the T-shirt sale for a label that functions largely online is less important. “We sell them a lot when we table somewhere for the label,” said Andreu. “But it’s not something we get a lot of online orders for, though we do get a lot of online orders for music. It’s important to branding, but it hasn’t been a thing we’ve put a lot of importance on.” But go another level up and the T-shirt regains its viability. Andreu explained the 360 label deal, common with large indie labels and most majors able to tap into economies of scale. “If you’re a label that does 360 deals, not only are you putting the money up front for the music, you’re also putting money up front for all the merchandise, I could totally see it where T-shirts become an important thing,” he said. “’Cause every time a band sells a T-shirt on the road, you’re getting back the money that you spend plus profit.” mstieb@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 47

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MUSIC

It’s baaaack: The Limelight returns with all its neon glory.

OUT WITH THE OLD

210.467.5565 1375 AUSTIN HWY MON-SUN 12P-2A

Step Inside And Judge For Yourself How Much The Limelight Has Changed MATT STIEB/@MATTHEWSTIEB

Authentic Thai Cuisine

First, an ode to the old nights without a full bill. The remainder Limelight — the venue where of the summer schedule fits in nicely heavy weather created gnarly with St. Mary’s Street’s indie and puddles of spilt liquor and rainwater punk inclinations, with gigs from FEA, behind the bar and exponentially Femina-X and Burning Palms coming up gnarlier puddles in the men’s bathroom. in August. Because of its long hall, the “Slimelight” For better or worse, the place looks was more conducive to smoking weed the same on the outside. The green neon than any other aboveboard building in is nice, but from the side, the bar looks town (other people, mom!). like you could topple it over with a soft After taking the first half of the year to Jenga-poke to the right support beam. doctor up its insides, 502 Bar operator Inside, the new speakers make the Deric Wynne reopened the Limelight in Limelight a place to hear music, not July. An infectiously nice guy dressed just a setting for drinking excessively in in nonchalant gear and a heavily curved the pursuit of rock ‘n’ roll. But that’s an snapback, he looks more like a friend option, too, as Wynne has brought a you might meet at a campsite than the commitment to pristine sound and a $5 purveyor of two of the best-sounding shot-and-a-tallboy combo from his bar venues in town. north of the airport. Almost four years into the 502 Like most bars with a long history venture, Wynne came into the and new management, it’s down Limelight’s neon glow when former to the clientele to dictate the bar’s operator Angel Castorena skipped to atmosphere. At the old Limelight, an focus on his flagship spot, The Korova. informative sign by the bar helped Wynne, who is “bad at naming stuff,” determine your drink choices: “No found a natural fit at the venue. “We Miller, No Bud Light, No Coors,” the don’t have to name it,” he told the San ornery thing read. Antonio Current. “This is great!” “We were so happy on our first night Wynne added: “Limelight doesn’t because there’s some products you have a set way of doing things. So it’s a almost have to buy just because,” said little bit more of an open palette.” Wynne. “Stuff like Miller Lite, Bud The bar is now open seven Light, ‘cause people just order it Limelight days a week, with open-mic so much. But on opening night, 2718 N. St. Mary’s St. Mondays (hosted by Nina Diaz) we sold as much Lone Star in a (210) 735-7775 and karaoke Tuesdays to draw on thelimelightsa.com night as we did a week at 502.”

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sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 49

SAN ANTONIO’S PREMIERE WHISKEY EVENT FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 18 | JACK GUENTHER PAVILION

S AW H I S K E Y B U S I N E S S . C O M TIX ON SALE NOW: GA $50 | VIP $80

50 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

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Alabama (yes, Alabama) space geeks Man or Astro-man? hit the Paper Tiger on Friday.

COSMIC SHORE The Delirious Space-Surf Of Man Or Astro-man? JAMES COURTNEY

a 12-year hiatus of sorts, returning “The surface of the earth is in 2013 with Defcon 5...4...3...2...1, the shore of the cosmic ocean. a delectably delirious and generous On this shore we’ve learned album that is nearly impossible to pin most of what we know. Recently we’ve down within the infinite spectrum of waded a little way out, maybe anklerock ‘n’ roll. deep, and the water seems inviting.” The lead single from the new — Carl Sagan release, “Disintegrate,” is a gritty You might think Alabama is a strange garage-rock jam that crashes and place for a fucking wicked, outre surfstops, seethes and squeals, and, rock band to hail from. But, it’s not so devoid of almost any typical surf-rock strange if you consider, as Carl Sagan vamping or note-bending, sounds like a groovily suggests, that all of the earth is grunge cover of a Velvet Underground a kind of cosmic shore. song or a lost Sonic Youth gem. Hailing from Auburn to be exact, The rest of Defcon largely follows Man or Astro-man? landed on the suit, often burying limited alternate cosmic shore in the early ’90s. The picking and other classic surf elements quartet ingeniously melds late ’70s under deep layers of reverb and punk, classic instrumental surf à la chunky grunge riffs, or eschewing Dick Dale and, perhaps especially, The them altogether. Spotnicks in a futuristic grunge style Even though Man or Astro-man? has all their own. always been only partially a surf-rock Between 1993 and 2001, over the outfit, Defcon is easily the group’s course of seven LPs, the group took least beachy, muddiest and most the surf-rock sound to galactic heights, doomful effort. updating it for a new generation and In the live setting, Man or Astroinfusing it with a unique and trippy sci-fi man? delivers notoriously zany and mysticism. For its inclusion of all the unpredictable performances disparate elements that make that at once defy and exemplify Man or Astro-man? great, the Man or Astro-man? band’s essential album is most feat. Turbo Fruits, Wray the heady, interstellar freak out of its music. So bust out those certainly 2000’s A Spectrum $15 8pm Fri, Aug 7 space-groove moves and neon of Infinite Scale. Paper Tiger water shoes and get ready for Following some of its 2410 N. St. Mary’s St. high tide. finest work, the band took papertiger.queueapp.com

M O N - F R I 3 P - 1 2 A • S A T- S U N 1 1 A - 1 2 A

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sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 51

Every 3rd Tuesday

MAY - OCTOBER | 7p-10p

In the heart of SAN ANTONIO

Aug 18 Los Texmaniacs FEA Lonely Horse

Arneson River Theatre at The Shops of La Villita | 418 Villita Street

52 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

SUN

“Terror in Taco Town”

Tex Pop, purveyors of eccentric and eclectic exhibits on the music of South Texas, continues its run of one-of-a-kind series with “Terror in Taco Town.” Riffing on the name of a 1938 B-movie Terror of Tiny Town, the show revisits the halcyon years of punk in San Antonio — 1978 to 1986 — with an exhibit kickoff concert. Gig posters, photos and newspaper articles will largely tell the story of this era in San Antonio music, from the Sex Pistols famed ’78 date in Taco Town (pictured above) to the baby-kissing days of Taco Land to the deep cuts you might only know if you were actually there. That’s the beauty of Tex Pop. Each installation is an opportunity to pick the brains of the curators, getting to know the sights and smells and off-the-record hits from the era at hand. For “Terror in Taco Town,” Jeff Smith of country-punk outfit Hickoids joins as guest curator. With The Next, The Semi Automatics, Screech of Death, Heather Leather, DJ Smarty. $5-$10, 2-6pm, Tex Pop, 1017 E. Mulberry, (210) 792-1312, stpcc.org — Matt Stieb

Wednesday, August 5

Bring Your Own Vinyl Revel with friendly vinyl-heads over the best wax in your collection, or slam pickle shots in the corner and seethe over that one girl with an original copy of Their Satanic Majesties Request. Hi-Tones, 9pm

Bruk Out! A term of celebration in

dancehall culture, Bruk Out! visits the legendary reverb and airhorns of the Jamaican genre. Concrete Jungle, 10pm

Nag Champa Named after the Indian

incense, Nag Champa hosts a weekly revue of the explosive cumbia rhythm. Bottom Bracket Social Club, 10pm

R5 Dang, I didn’t know Disney Channel

was still pimping its underling teen stars into high-fructose teen idols, but apparently it’s still a viable business model. R5 is the pop project of Ross Lynch and his siblings all with the same initials. Known for his Disney Channel work on Austin & Ally and Teen Beach Movie, the Mickey Mouse cash lords look to strike gold again with another towheaded family of nascent stars. With Jacob Whitesides, Ryland. Whitewater Amphitheater, 6pm

Terry Cavanagh and the Alpine Express New Braunfels’ Terry Cavanagh and the Alpine Express hit the polka hard. This lederhosen-featured evening is also a great opportunity to ogle at the Pearl Stable, the ideal wedding venue that you definitely cannot afford. Pearl Stable, 5:30pm

Thursday, August 6

A Thousand Horses On “Smoke,” A

Thousand Horses frontman Michael Hobby mixes his sex and drug metaphors a few too many times. Cowboys Dancehall, 7pm

Emperors & Elephants On “Who You Are,” Emperors & Elephants sound like hard rock Tinder predators. Opening line: “I like them broken.” First line in the hook: “I’m ready for whatever.” Swipe left! With Era 9. Fitzgerald’s Bar, 7pm

Estatica Vol. 1 A reprise of the Youth

Orchestra of San Antonio’s performance of Radiohead’s OK Computer in which YOSA backs local indie artists. With Aerial Horizon, Octahedron, Nicolette Good, Alyson Alonzo. Brick at Blue Star, 7:45

Jamaican Queens Detroit electro-pop

quartet Jamaican Queens named their band after a pun on the outer boroughs. Their 2015 album Downers is a little more accessible, with 808s, remarkable synths and a heart-on-the-sleeve emotional stance. With Xes Xes. 502 Bar, 9pm

Laura Marie The former singer of Texas outfit Sofa Kingdom, Laura Marie sings with great insight into daily life. On “Everyone Gets Lonely,” the San Antonio native sings of the “light that apathy provided.” With Dead Tree Duo, Mystery Loves Company, Optic Arrest. Jack’s Bar, 7pm

The Suite feat. DJ Gibb and Donnie Dee Two of SA’s finest DJs deliver a Thursday night soundtrack in original funky drummers. Southtown 101, 10pm

sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 53

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54 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

Friday, August 7

Cody Jinks Texas country-crooner and

beard enthusiast Cody Jinks sings of a libertarian, judgment-free lifestyle on “Cast No Stones.” Gruene Hall, 7pm

Camp Life, Emma Stoned, Junkie

Imagine Books & Records continues its mission to host shows for the all-ages crowd with this showcase of indie rock and shoegaze outfits. Imagine Books & Records, 8pm

George Padilla Latin Jazz Ensemble San

Anto bandleader George Padilla brings the hits from Mongo, Dizzy et. al. Blue Star Brewing Company, 7pm

Ghost Police On its 2013 self-titled LP, Ghost

Police revved through radly named tunes like the hungry, spitting “Day of the Bacon” and the authoritarian anger of “North Korean Soap Opera.” After spending the spring in the recording studio, expect new tunes soon from the heavy San Antonio quartet. With the relentless backing of Spokesmodel and Pinko. Hi-Tones, 9pm

Gravehill LA death metal band Gravehill

has a chokehold on the listeners of the 2014 album Death Curse, leaving the audience without a second to catch its breath from the harsh metal riffs. With Gholgotha Blaspherian, Sacrocurse, Ritual Decay, Terrorist. The Korova, 8pm

Henry + The Invisibles SA’s own Henry +

the Invisibles continues to turn in soulful, ridiculously costumed one-man shows. Rebar, 10pm

House of Lightning Florida stoners House

of Lightning rep all that is fun about metal on the 2014 Lightworker LP on Austin’s Fair Warning label. With Wrong, Dead, Omotai. Paper Tiger, 8pm

Jeff Woolsey and Dancehall Kings Cutting rugs in the dancehalls north of Houston, Jeff Woolsey has a deep appreciation for the music of Texas and the long wooden halls in which it was written. Leon Springs Dance Hall, 7pm

Michael Sweet The frontman of Christian

rock outfit Stryper, Michael Sweet also fronted townie rock legends Boston for a four year stint beginning in 2007. In 2015, Sweet released his fifth solo effort Only To Rise. With The Blitz U.S.A. The Korova, 7pm

Remanon Remanon’s new tune

“Calamitous Cacophony” is anything but a discordant collection of sounds, but instead a thought-out, provoking slice of modern prog from the San Antonio quartet. The Falls, 10pm

Rich Hands, Backbones With a long-

running deal with Detroit’s Fountain Records and now receiving cassette distribution through the badass Burger

label, the Rich Hands returned in good standing for its 2014 LP Out of My Head. For its sophomore album, the Rich Hands looked retrospectively to break the garage rock prototype. With organ and tambourine adornments, the trio could fit in quite comfortably on a Johnny Thunders-heavy mixtape. With the recent addition of guitarist Thomas Knierien, the Rich Hands have returned to early days as a four-piece. Featuring members of The Bolos and Antique Sunlight, Backbones split the difference between raw blues and rock ‘n’ roll. With Louisiana swamp-rockers Lochness Mobsters. Limelight, 9pm

The Sandworms San Antonio’s The

Sandworms describe themselves as “funeral Ggalactacore.“ I don’t have any idea what that means, but the quartet does have a dark surf rock feel. The Mix, 11pm

Saturday, August 8

Michael J. & The Foxes As Deer Vibes

leader Michael Carrillo picks up steam with his side project Michael J. and the Foxes, don’t expect the big band to get dropped anytime soon. Still, the Foxes represent the sweet taste of indie rock dudes dipping fingers into the tradition of integrity-havin’ country. With Blackbird Sing. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm

Coliseum, Pinkish Black, Extent Louisville sluggers Coliseum rip through sludgy punk on the 2015 effort Anxiety’s Kiss. Fort Worth’s Pinkish Black play a manic form of doom on a 2012 self-titled release. With Extent. The Korova, 8pm

Gary P. Nunn The writer of the Austin

City Limits theme, progressive country mainstay Gary P. Nunn attended UT during the cosmic cowboy days of the late ’60s and early ’70s, joining the Lost Gonzo Band that backed Jerry Jeff Walker on his MCA dates. Over the years, his deft songwriting has been covered by Jerry Jeff, Michael Murphy, Tracy Nelson, David Alan Coe, Rosanne Cash and Willie Nelson. Luckenbach Dancehall, 8pm

James McMurtry James McMurtry, the

son of writer Larry McMurtry — best known for his Pulitzer Prize-winning, miniseries-inspiring novel Lonesome Dove — is an Americana singer-songwriter with a chip on his shoulder. His songs, beginning with those on his stellar 1989 début Too Long in the Wasteland, are writerly and sprawling meditations on American decay. He tells the stories of the forgotten and challenges the status quo with a calm and precise fire, in the great tradition of folkies like Pete Seeger and Woody Guthrie. But, unlike Guthrie, he also rails against the sedative power

Aug 7 - John Conlee

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Aug 8- James McMurtry

MUSIC SCHEDULE August 5 Live Band Karaoke

Aug 22 - Buddy Brown

August 6 Ruben V August 7 Finding Friday

Sept 12 - Robert Earl Keen

August 8 Nerdy by Nature August 10 Chris Lopez

Sept 25 - The Mavericks

August 11 Mark Odom

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sacurrent.com • August 5–11, 2015 • CURRENT 55

sanantoniomusicawards.com 56 CURRENT • August 5–11, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MUSIC

of superficial religious belief and doesn’t await the second coming as some magical Deus ex Machina in the great American drama. Floore’s Country Store, 7pm

Josh Abbott Toobapalooza After his

hit “She’s Like Texas,” hopefully Josh Abbott realizes he has 49 more opportunities to make some money off this concept. Here’s to “He’s Like Florida,” a song involving a boy as “pure as bath salts” and as handsome as “Dan Marino in his teal Sunday best.” Whitewater Amphitheater, 7:30pm

Los Texmaniacs Bajo sexto player Max

Baca was born in New Mexico but moved to San Antonio when Flaco Jiménez asked him to join his band. In 1997, Baca struck out on his own with Los Texmaniacs, a delightful combination of rock ‘n’ roll and tejano in the style of Flaco’s Texas Tornados. In 2010, Baca y Los Texmaniacs won a Grammy for Best Tejano Album with Borders y Bailes. Paper Tiger, 9pm

The Purtells This San Anto sextet writes

ambitious pop gems with a wink to The Strokes. With Sioux & Fox Lost In City, Gary Davenport, Sailing Ships. Imagine Books & Records, 8pm

William Clark Green After seven years

touring on the Texas country circuit, Flint native William Clark Green made an impact on the Billboard country chart to the tune of the 18th spot. Gruene Hall, 8pm

Sunday, August 9

Basketball Shorts, Radioactivity, Detonate Paper Tiger begins its

Sunday rock ‘n’ roll brunch for people who hate brunch with three courses of garage rock. From Austin, headliners Basketball Shorts rip though athletic party-punk on The Total BS EP. Paper Tiger, noon

Billy Ray Sheppard Saxophonist Billy Ray Sheppard brings a smooth jazz tone to SA’s favorite public drinking and selfie spot. Hays Street Bridge, 6:30pm

Pierre Poree & Brent Watkins Clarinetist

and New Orleans native Pierre Poree teams up with pianist Doc Watkins for an interpretation of the New Orleans jazz tradition. Witte Museum, noon

Monday, August 10

Circuit Des Yeux, Saakred, Marisa Anderson With expansive textures

and an utterly unforgetable voice, Circuit Des Yeux’s In Plain Speech is a transformative listen. A bellwether of creativity and queer art in San Antonio, Saakred has stepped into new territory with Make Believe, a vision of taut and emotional rock ‘n’ roll. Blues guitarist Marisa Anderson dropped out of college at 19 to walk the U.S. for 15 years, an experience that informs her flawless guitar playing and crisp songwriting. With Aux Aux. Paper Tiger, 9pm

Small World Led by drummer Kyle Keener and guitarist Polly Harrison, Small World places world features music from the Great American Songbook and bossa nova sung in the original Portuguese. Olmos Bharmacy, 7:30pm

Tuesday, August 11

River City Big Band A seventeen-piece

combo, the River City Big Band favors the material of Lenny Niehaus, Sammy Nestico, Louis Bellson and Dave Wolpe. Blue Star Brewing Company, 8pm

Jim Cullum Jazz Band Any serious

reputation San Antonio has as a jazz town has to be chalked up to Jim Cullum, Jr., the man in charge of the long running public radio show Riverwalk Jazz and who’s been consistently swinging in the Alamo City for decades. Bohanan’s, 7pm

502 Bar 502 Embassy Oaks, (210) 257-8125, 502bar.com Blue Star Brewing Company 1414 S. Alamo St., (210) 2125506, bluestarbrewing.com Bohanan’s 219 E. Houston, (210) 472-2600, bohanans.com Bottom Bracket Social Club 1609 N. Colorado, facebook.com/bottombracketsocialclub Brick at Blue Star 108 Blue Star, (210) 884-8019, facebook. com/brickatbluestar Concrete Jungle 1628 S. Presa St., (210) 373-9907, facebook.com/tikiconcretejungle Cowboys Dancehall 3030 NE Interstate 410 Loop, (210) 646-9378, cowboysdancehall.com Fitzgerald’s Bar 437 McCarty, (210) 629-5141 Floore’s Country Store 14492 Old Bandera Rd., Helotes, (210) 695-8827, liveatfloores.com Gruene Hall 1281 Gruene Rd., New Braunfels, (830) 606-1281, gruenehall.com Hays Street Bridge 803 N. Cherry St., (210) 207-0970 Hi-Tones 621 E. Dewey, (210) 573-6220 Imagine Books & Records 8373 Culebra Rd., (210) 236-7668, imaginebookstore.com Jack’s Bar 3030 Thousand Oaks, (210) 494-2309, jacksbarsa.com Leon Springs Dance Hall 24135 IH-10W, (210) 698-7070, leonspringsdancehall.com Limelight 2718 N. St. Mary’s, (210) 735-7775, thelimelightsa. com Luckenbach Dance Hall 412 Luckenbach Town Loop, Fredericksburg, (830) 997-3224, luckenbachtexas.com Olmos Bharmacy 3902 McCullough, (210) 822-1188, olmosrx.com Paper TIger 2410 N. St. Mary’s, papertiger.queueapp. com Pearl Stable 307 Pearl, (210) 212-7260, atpearl.com/events Rebar 8134 Broadway, (210) 320-4091, rebarsatx. com Sam’s Burger Joint 330 E. Grayson, (210) 223-2830, samsburgerjoint.com The Falls 226 W. Bitters Rd., (210) 490-5553, thefallsbar.com The Korova 107 E. Martin, (210) 226-5070, thekorova.com The Mix 2403 N. St. Mary’s St. Whitewater Amphitheater 11860 FM306, New Braunfels, (830) 964-3800, whitewaterrocks.com Witte Museum 3801 Broadway St., (210) 357-1900, wittemuseum.com

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HIGH TIMES

SAVAGE LOVE by Dan Savage

Does a person who acts loving only when high on weed really love you? My live-in boyfriend of three years acts sweet, loving, and caring when he’s high, but when the weed runs out, he’s mean, angry, hurtful, and horrible to be around. I’ve asked him when he’s stoned to still act like a loving person when the weed runs out, but of course that never happens. He just dismisses that he’s mean and hurtful and he blames me for why he’s angry. I’m so confused! Without weed, he’s intolerable. Should I just make sure he’s always well stocked with his drug? He’s a relatively functional stoner, even though technically it’s not allowed at his job. I’ve told all my friends he is no longer the mean asshole he was when I wanted to leave him (but didn’t) and now I’ve convinced everyone that he transformed back into the amazing catch I always knew he was. So basically, in order to save face over not leaving him (and now I can’t for financial reasons), I burned the bridges. Tensions Highlight Concerns That Relationships Aren’t Perfect Someone who can be nice only when he’s high isn’t someone you should be fucking, living with, or starting a grow-op on your roof for, THCTRAP, he’s someone you should be dumping, dumping and dumping. And to be clear: Your boyfriend’s problem isn’t weed, THCTRAP, your boyfriend’s problem is asshole. And the fact that you’re covering for him — the fact that you can’t go to your friends for help because you worked so hard

to convince them he’s not an asshole — is a very, very bad sign. If being with someone isolates you from the support of your friends, that’s not someone you should be with. Does he love you? Maybe he does, maybe he doesn’t — but even if he does, do you want to be loved by someone who treats you like shit when he isn’t fucked up? No, you don’t. My advice: DTMFA. But let’s get a second opinion, shall we? “It’s not unusual for people to complain that they feel a little cranky when they run out of weed,” said Dan Skye, editor-in-chief of High Times magazine. “I know a lot of people who prefer to be high all the time — but if his personality is that different when he runs out of weed, this woman’s boyfriend has problems other than not being high.” Now, there are people out there who self-medicate with pot — in good ways, not bad ways. “I know many people who have dumped their pharmaceuticals for pot,” said Skye, “because pot is a better substance for easing their pain and anxiety. There are no side effects, it’s good at easing pain and it even eases some severe medical conditions. There are people out there who are high all the time, I know hundreds of them and they are perfectly functional, responsible human beings. We are hardwired as humans to hook up with this plant, and some people hook up with this plant in profound ways. It makes them feel better, it makes them more compassionate and more creative —i t makes them better human beings.” But Skye doesn’t think your boyfriend is one of those people, THCTRAP. “If this guy is such a prick when he’s not high, I’d get rid of him,” said Skye. “Putting your girlfriend in a position where she feels like she has to become your dealer — that she has to supply you with pot — is not acceptable.”

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JONESIN’ CROSSWORD by Matt Jones

Answer on page 19

EMPLOYMENT OPPORTUNITIES –

Cappy’s Restaurant, Cappyccino’s and La Fonda on Main are three of San Antonio’s premier restaurants. We are accepting applications for experienced front of house and kitchen positions including servers, hosts, prep/line cooks and dishwashers. Our staff is carefully selected, well trained and earns exceptional pay. We offer a professional family work environment, with great benefits including paid vacation, medical and life insurance and bonus potential. These positions require availability nights and weekends and experience in the restaurant/ catering business. Compensation: Server - avg $20/hr Host/Assistant - avg $14/hr Prep/Line Cook - $12 and up Dishwasher - $10 and up

“Make It Your Priority” — that is, if you’re Cookie Monster. ACROSS

1 Cloud over 6 Cookie’s partner? 10 Wi-fi setting 14 Avoid by deceit 15 “Who’s that kid with the ___ cookie?” (old jingle) 16 “My Name Is ___” 17 Beverage unit 18 Former picnic game that should’ve been titled “The Most Dangerous Game” 20 Cookie Monster, why do you like playing fetch with your dog? 22 Former New Jersey governor Tom 23 Longtime Mex. ruling party 24 ___ sorta 28 Superlative suffix 29 Wanna-___ 30 Lymphatic mass near a tonsil 32 Poet’s “before” 33 “Just so you’re aware...” 34 Embattled TV host 35 Cookie, what’s that picture of the Cheshire Cat with Winnie the Pooh? 39 Carbon dioxide’s lack 40 Masters’ mastery 41 Say no to 42 Toast opener 44 ___ Dew 45 Checked out

48 Japanese comic book genre 49 Hang like a diaper 50 ___ mater 51 Cookie, I don’t like this blindfold, but is that...aluminum? 55 Entree where you eat the bowl 58 Hen’s comment 59 Aloha Tower locale 60 “Tomb Raider” heroine Croft 61 Wood shop machine 62 Art colony in the desert 63 Like new stamp pads 64 Hurt all over

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25 Nick’s wife in “The Thin Man” 26 Couturier Christian 27 Ax’s cousin 29 Chilly response 30 Novelist Rand 31 Stayed put 32 Beyond bad 33 Page by phone? 35 Light-bulb lighter? 36 In shreds 37 Film colleague of Morpheus and Trinity 38 Bargain basement container 39 Physicist with a law and a unit named after him 43 Admission exams, casually 44 “Help!” 45 Pro tracker 46 “Cocoon” Oscar winner Don 47 Left one’s job in a huff 49 Feature of much witty blogging 50 Company with a duck mascot 52 “Going Back to ___” (LL Cool J single) 53 Jackson of country music 54 “Fiat lux” is its motto 55 “Bubble Guppies” watcher 56 Electric toothbrush battery size 57 Stand-up comic Margaret

To apply, join us for an informational session at La Fonda on Main on August 15th at 8:00am. Breakfast will be provided followed by a presentation and interviews for qualified candidates. Visit our website at www.cappysrestaurant.com for more information and an application. Please bring a completed application and resume to the event. Applications can also be sent to admin@ cappysrestaurant.com We look forward to seeing you soon!

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): Charles de Lint is a novelist whose stories are influenced by folklore, myths, and science fiction. In his book Yarrow, a wizardly character named Toby is skilled at conjuring. He can make small objects appear and disappear, for example. But Toby yearns for more. ❝I want to be magic,” he says. “I want to be a friend of elves and live in a tree. I want to marry a moonbeam and hear the stars sing. I don’t want to pretend at magic anymore. I want to be magic.” If you have ever wished for a comparable upgrade, Aries, now is an unusually favorable time to work on it.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): An imaginative Welsh man named Liam Bennett has developed a “dausage,” which is a blend of a doughnut and sausage. One of his most requested treats is pork meat stuffed with strawberry jelly. Even if this novel blend doesn’t appeal to your taste buds, it serves as a good prompt for my advice: The coming weeks will be a favorable time to expand your notion of what types of nourishment are fun and healthy for you. I mean that in the metaphorical as well as the literal sense. Experiment with new recipes, both with the food you provide your body and the sustenance you feed your soul.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): In the woods, living matter isn’t segregated from the decaying stuff. Rotting tree trunks are host to teeming colonies of moss. Withered stems of ferns mingle with cheerful saplings. Audacious mushrooms sprout up among scraps of fallen leaves. The birds and beetles and lizards and butterflies don’t act as if this mix is weird. They seem to be at peace with it. I suspect they thrive on it, even exult in it. That’s the spirit I suggest you adopt as you enjoy the paradoxical mélange of your life in the coming weeks, Gemini. Celebrate the mysterious magic that emerges as you simultaneously fade and flourish, decline and increase, wind down and rise up.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): Here are some tips on being the best Cancerian you can be: 1. Cultivate your sensitivity as a strength. Regard your emotional vulnerability as a superpower. 2. Nurture yourself at least as much as you nurture others. 3. Learn to know the difference between your golden hunches and the glimmering delusions that your demons stir up. 4. Be kind, but don’t be exorbitantly nice. 5. Remember that others’ unhappiness is rarely your fault or responsibility. 6. Keep reinventing the way you love yourself.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22):

“What are the best things and the worst things in your life, and when are you going to

get around to whispering or shouting them? ” This question was posed by Leo author Ray Bradbury in his book Zen in the Art of Writing: Essays on Creativity. Even if you’re not a writer yourself, you will benefit from responding to his exhortation. It’s one of the best things you could possibly do to activate your dormant creativity and intensify your lust for life. This is one of those times when working with your extremes is not only safe and healthy, but also fun and inspirational. So do it, Leo! Get excited and expressive about the best and worst things in your life.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): It’s time to leave behind the golden oldies. You’d be wise to tiptoe away from tradition, and give the ghosts of the past one last kiss goodbye, and wean yourself from nostalgia for the good old days. Frankly, my dear, you’ve got numerous appointments with the future, and it would be a shame to miss them because you’re mucking around with memories. In the coming weeks — for that matter, in the coming months — you’re most likely to thrive if you become an agent of change. And the most important thing to change is your relationship to the person you used to be. LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): In

Indonesia, the term gotong-royong is defined as the “joint bearing of burdens.” In practice it means that you and I and our allies get together voluntarily to help each other achieve a shared goal. It may also be an agreement to provide mutual aid: I help you do what you need to have done, and you help me with my task. Gotong-royong also implies that we enjoy working together. The emotional tone that we cultivate is affection and care. By sharing a burden, we lighten the load that each of us has to bear. I bring this to your attention, Libra, because it’s the gotong-royong season for you and yours. Be the ringleader who initiates and sustains it.

you’re not serving as a benevolent mischiefmaker for someone you care about, you’re shirking your duty. Your allegiance should be with X-factors and wild cards. You will thrive to the degree that you cultivate alliances with mavericks and instigators. Are you shrewd enough to mess with time-tested formulas? Are you restless enough to rebel against habits that stifle your curiosity?

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19):

How to be a Capricorn, according to my Capricorn reader Sadie Kennedy: When you are younger, take yourself too seriously. Look and act older than you actually are as you serve what’s most practical. Sacrifice fun and frivolity, working doggedly to achieve the goals you yearn for, until you reach some level of accomplishment. Then realize, as if struck by a thunderbolt, that fun and frivolity have practical value. Begin to age backwards like Benjamin Button as you balance work with play and discipline with leisure. Enjoy the fruits of your intense efforts as everyone tells you how relaxed and supple and resilient you are becoming.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18):

Cracking open the shell of a soft-boiled egg is a tricky task. You must be firm enough to break the shell, but sufficiently gentle to avoid making a mess. If you live in Germany, you have

access to a metal instrument that provides just the right measure of soft force. It’s called an Eierschalensollbruchstellenverursacher, translated as “soft-boiled egg shell cracker.” Your assignment in the coming weeks is to cultivate a talent that is metaphorically similar to an Eierschalensollbruchstellenverursacher. I believe you will need that blend of sensitivity and power on numerous occasions.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20):

Americans often regard Cuba as impoverished and backwards. There is an element of truth in their prejudice, primarily because the U.S. has imposed a stifling embargo on the Caribbean nation for over 50 years. That’s why, for example, many Cubans drive cars that were manufactured in the 1950s. But I wonder how my fellow citizens would respond if they knew that in some ways Cuba’s healthcare system is better than America’s. The World Health Organization recently congratulated Cuba for being the first country on earth to eradicate the transmission of syphilis and HIV from mothers to babies. Can you identify a metaphorically similar situation in your personal life, Pisces? Are there people you regard as inferior or undeveloped who could teach you an important lesson or motivate you to grow? Now is a perfect time to benefit from their influence.

THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21):

In one of his poems, Jack Gilbert mentions “the incurably sane,” who are “uncrippled by beauty” and “unbutchered by love.” When I read those lines, I felt a surge of protest. Is there a single person on the earth who fits that description? No! I was miffed by such starryeyed idealism. Later, though, as I studied the astrological omens for you Scorpios, my attitude softened. I realized that the coming weeks may be a time when many of you will at least temporarily be incurably sane, uncrippled by beauty, and unbutchered by love. If you’re one of these lucky ones, please use your blessed grace to spread an abundance of blessed grace everywhere you go.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21):

If you’re not skirting the edges of the forbidden zone, you’re playing it too safe. If

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