San Antonio Current – January 17, 2018

JANUARY 17-24, 2018

Expand Your

Vocabulary The untold story of

Andrea

"Vocab" Sanderson

FREE

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 3

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st. a n t h o n y ’s

opening reception 25 January 2018 6-10 pm

LOST & FOUND

free & open to the public

A signature initiative of San Antonio Poet Laureate Jenny Browne.

This exhibition is grounded in the history of San Antonio, featuring community poems and artworks that pay tribute to the known and lost history of our City by examining the personal, social, and historical connections to the land, people, and cultures that make up the City’s landscape in 2018.

exhibition dates 25 January – 28 April 2018 where Culture Commons Gallery 115 Plaza de las Armas SATX 78205 gallery hours Monday – Friday 8am – 5pm

featured artists Albert Alvarez, Fernando Andrade, Lisette Chavez, Joe De La Cruz, Joey Fauerso, Paul Fauerso, Barbara Felix, Ana Fernandez, Xavier Gilmore, Joe Harjo, M. Guadalupe Marmolejo, Abraham Mojica, Kristy Perez, Jose Sotelo, Hiromi Stringer, Allison Valdivia, Jose Villalobos, and Juan Zavala Castro.

#getcreativesa | getcreativesanantonio.com | 210-206-ARTS |

St.Anthony-Lost&Found_Current_AD_10.25 x10.18_FNL.indd 1

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 5 12/17/17 12:45 AM

FIRST WORDS 1

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On Councilman Peleaz Calls Citizen's Comments 'Gibberish' on Facebook // You have to start somewhere if you want to become president. – Robert Trottmann On Local Group Organizes Counter Protest to MLK March, Citing Police Shootings // Will the counter protest march be a big politcal march too? sad that the MLK march here in SA has too many political advertisements , candidates looking for tv cameras, and screen time. Instead of being thier for the right reasons. – Miguel Carranza On This Guy Went All Out to Celebrate 100 Visits to Whataburger // Current. There are other burger places too. – Estanislao Garza On Legal Age to Buy Tobacco in San Antonio Raised to 21 // While were at it, we need to raise the age of tortilla purchases to 21 to combat diabetes. 95% of diabetics began eating tortillas before the age of 21, during a period of time when the brain is especially susceptible to taco addiction.

– Glenn Moss

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Issue 18_03 /// January 17-23, 2018

NEWS

Witness Protection San Antonio police chief, mayor stand by handling of human smuggling case

23

CALENDAR

Up in Smoke Legal age to buy tobacco in San Antonio raised to 21

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SCREENS

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FOOD

Homing in on the Range Modern chophouse basics, the Dady way Food Court Picante Grill closes, Culinaria returns and more

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ON THE

COVER Andrea “Vocab” Sanderson is arguably one of the most prolific artists, teachers and performers in San Antonio. This week we take a look at the work Sanderson's achievements over 20-plus years of performing in the Alamo City and the region.

Photography by Chris Conde.

Art direction by Carlos Aguilar.

CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

ARTS + CULTURE

Galactic Gut-Check Neil deGrasse Tyson wants you to get your shit together (because the universe doesn’t care about you)

Our top picks for the week

Ruled Out Department of Education says Texas illegally kept thousands of disabled students from resources

Call Me Maybe?

Coming-of-age gay romance Call Me

By Your Name is a cinematic vacation

6

14

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MUSIC

Expand Your Vocabulary The untold story of Andrea “Vocab” Sanderson Music Calendar What to see and hear this week

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ETC.

Savage Love Jonesin’ Crossword Freewill Astrology

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NIGHTLIFE

Spirited Know-How Seminars, new spirits still reigned supreme during this year’s San Antonio Cocktail Conference What’s Brewing Nightlife openings, parties and more

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 7

NEWS

SHUTTERSTOCK

Ruled Out

SHUTTERSTOCK

Department of Education says Texas illegally kept thousands of disabled students from resources ALEX ZIELINSKI | @ALEX_ZEE

≥

A U.S. Department of Education investigation has ruled that Texas’ education agency illegally denied therapy, tutoring, counseling, and other needed aid to tens of thousands of students with disabilities.

In 2016, a Houston Chronicle investigation uncovered that since 2004, the Texas Education Agency had capped the percentage of students allowed to participate in special education programs at 8.5 percent – a decision that even State Board of Education officials called “arbitrary.” This move left an estimated 150,000 students with disabilities unable to access resources they were entitled to.

Disability advocates say the policy has likely done immeasurable damage to kids that

desperately needed, but were left out of, special education classes.

The fallout from this explosive investigation inspired Texas lawmakers to scrap the policy and introduce new bills improving special education access in the 2017 state legislature.

But that didn’t appease the federal government. After the Chronicle’s investigation, the Department of Education kicked off an extensive, 15-month investigation into Texas’ special education system. The investigation included hours of meeting with school staff and parents of neglected special ed students, who described chilling scenarios where autistic students were locked in padded, sound-

sanantonio300.org 8 CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

proof cells, or where a student’s suicide attempt in a 4th grade classroom was simply called “disruptive.”

On Thursday, Jan. 15, the DOE sent TEA a letter concluding the investigation’s findings and ordered the state to come up with a plan to identify every student who was unfairly kept out of special ed programs and figure out how to (belatedly) help them.

“Every child with a disability must have appropriate access to special education and related services that meet his or her unique needs,” said Education Secretary Betsy DeVos said in a statement. “Far too many students in Texas had been precluded from receiving supports and services.”

The feds did not give TEA a timeline

1718 2018

as to when they expect a new plan. So, in his response to the letter, Governor Greg Abbott instructed TEA to prepare a “corrective action plan draft” within a week.

“The past dereliction of duty on the part of many school districts to serve our students and the failure of TEA to hold districts accountable are worthy of criticism,” Abbott wrote. “At the state and local level, the practices that led to the DOE monitoring letter will end.”

In a press statement, TEA Commissioner Mike Morath said he shared Abbott’s urgency to fix the many systemic problems within the special education program and will deliver a corrective plan by the governor’s deadline.

LOOKS GOOD ON YOU

NEWS

SHUTTERSTOCK

Up in Smoke

Legal age to buy tobacco in San Antonio raised to 21

ALEX ZIELINSKI | @ALEX_ZEE

>

San Antonio has become the first city in Texas to join a wave of cities and counties across the country to raise the legal age to purchase tobacco to 21.

Currently, more than 270 localities have done so, along with five entire states (California, Oregon, Hawaii, New Jersey and Maine).

This decision intends to curb the number of young San Antonians getting addicted to tobacco. According to Colleen Bridger, director of San Antonio Metro Health, 95 percent of smokers begin before the age of 21, during a period of time when the brain is especially susceptible to addiction.

In a brief presentation before the council on Jan. 11, Bridger shared the results of an online survey of more than 5,000 San Antonians, showing that 77.5 percent of participants supported the age hike.

Those opposed to the ordinance argue the decision is yet another way local government is elbowing its way into the personal lives of its citizens — similar to laws limiting soda serving sizes.

Convenience store owners have also expressed their concern over the financial blow this rule will likely have on their businesses — especially when their competitor stores outside city limits won’t have to abide by the new law. The

day before, a group of these business owners and industry representatives crowded the steps of City Hall to protest the change.

“We think it’s unfair business practice to where markets outside of the whatever respective territory,” Paul Hardin, president of the Texas Food and Fuel Organization, told KSAT. “Whether that’s county, city or state boundaries, and move that business to other locations.”

Prior to the council vote, Bridger said she had met with the South Texas Merchants Association and Association of Convenience Store Retailers to talk over their concerns.

Anwar Tahir, president of the ACSR, he was only called at 3 p.m. Jan. 10 to come in for a 5 p.m. emergency meeting with Bridger and other city staffers at 5 p.m. that same day. Fortunately, he said, he could make the meeting — but he called it “a joke,” especially since he’s been asking for a meeting like this for quite some time.

“Please give us more time to meet with you,” he tearfully asked the council Jan. 11. “You’re taking my money, my business, my dinner, how am I supposed to feed my family?

You’re hurting small businesses run by minorities.”

Four other business owners came forward asking why the council hasn’t asked them to have a serious meeting

about their financial worries.

Based on these conversations, Bridger asked the council to postpone the rule’s implementation to October 1, instead of the proposed August 1 start date. During these two extra months, Bridger said she’ll encourage other local municipalities to adopt the rule, so local businesses have a level playing field with the other Bexar County municipalities. She said she plans to hold more stakeholder meetings with the business owners after the vote.

But the last-minute stakeholder meeting on an issue that’s been simmering in City Hall over several months rubbed several members of city council the wrong way.

“If that was HEB or Frost Bank, would you vote to pass this today? Would you say, ‘Oops I’ll take care of you in a stakeholder meeting?’ No,” said Councilman Greg Brockhouse. “Equity swings all ways. We have to adhere that to all communities.”

While Councilwoman Shirley Gonzales voted in favor of the ordinance, she said she was “very disappointed” in the way Bridger handled the retailers.

“I feel like there was not the communication with them, but when do you communicate it to the people who are actually impacted,” she said. “We didn’t cover all our bases.”

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t e x a s s a l s a f e s t. c o m

NEWS

Witness Protection JOSH HUSKIN

BRYAN RINDFUSS

San Antonio police chief, mayor stand by handling of human smuggling case ALEX ZIELINSKI | @ALEX_ZEE

≥

“Let me try to be real clear on this.”

That’s how San Antonio Police Chief William McManus began his response to questions at a Jan. 11 press conference on the steps of City Hall. While the event was meant to recognize human trafficking month, McManus couldn’t ignore the news that Texas’ second in command, Lieutenant Governor Dan Patrick, had just requested a serious investigation into how he conducted a December smuggling case.

“I broke no protocols,” McManus said. “I did exactly what my chiefly prerogatives allowed me to do.”

By now, most San Antonians know what he’s talking about: The Dec. 23 arrest of a man in Southeast San Antonio for allegedly smuggling 12 people in the back of his semi-truck.

According to McManus, the trip allegedly began and ended in Texas (no international borders were crossed) and the passengers are allegedly of Guatemalan descent. Since he chose to handle the crime using state law, instead of federal, McManus did not inquire about the passengers’ citizenship status, nor did he run their names through a criminal background check. To SAPD, these 12 were witnesses, if not victims, to a crime — and they treated them as

such. There is no evidence that they are undocumented immigrants.

After getting their contact information, McManus released the 12 to a local immigrant aid nonprofit. The chief has said a federal agent was present throughout the investigation.

Regardless, some officials and members of the public believe McManus intentionally kept federal immigration agents from being involved in the case.

In a Jan. 10 evening email to Attorney General Ken Paxton, Lt. Gov. Patrick suggested McManus may have broken Senate Bill 4, or SB4, Texas’ newest immigration law that requires local law enforcement comply with requests from federal agents to detain suspected undocumented immigrants.

That means Patrick believes the police chief refused to follow the request of a federal agent to detain the immigrants. Which, according to McManus, wasn’t the case.

“There were no SAPD protocols broken,” McManus continued. “[Homeland Security] was on the scene and they had every opportunity to what they needed to do. They weren’t denied access. Why they didn’t take anyone into custody, I don’t know. But we handled the prosecution of the smuggling incident under the state statute.”

Nonetheless, the Attorney General’s office has begun an investigation into

SAPD’s handling of the case.

Erica Schommer, immigration law professor at St. Mary’s Law School, said McManus decision was “no way in violation” of SB 4 — especially since some major parts of the law are still tangled up in litigation. In fact, she said McManus dodged a potential lawsuit by not detaining the 12 passengers.

That’s because SAPD officers are only allowed to run a background check or detain a witness to a crime if they have a reason to believe they are guilty of a crime. Since being a victim of human smuggling is not a crime under state law, officers had no right to do so.

“The San Antonio Police Department had no legal basis to hold [the witnesses],” said Mayor Ron Nirenberg, also present at the press conference.

“The city could have faced legal liability if the police had held them.”

Schommer said this thinking is “absolutely true.”

“It’s similar to SAPD responding to a home invasion call, and when they show up at the house they find that six other people were inside while the crime took place,” she explained.

“Officers wouldn’t check their criminal history or detain them.”

According to Schommer, the fact McManus decided to process the case at the state level isn’t what’s so unusual about this case. It’s that SAPD were

involved in the first place.

“In most smuggling cases like this, people are generally discovered by federal law enforcement first — either at a immigration checkpoint or at places known to be regular loading or unloading places,” she said. “This scenario in and of itself is what’s really strange about the case.”

It’s hard to know exactly what made McManus decide to hand the case over to state courts rather than the feds.

Perhaps it was informed by the last time San Antonio was hit with a major smuggling case — in which federal agents didn’t allow the passengers to apply for immigrant protection under a certain visa granted for crime witnesses who comply with the police. Instead, the feds deported at least seven potential key witnesses. In that July case, McManus received a wave of criticism from the immigrant advocacy community. Now, he’s getting heat from the other side.

But, like last time, city leaders have run to defend McManus’ decision-making.

“Attacks on Police Chief McManus are nothing but political theatre based on a fictitious narrative,” Nirenberg told the crowd at the press conference. “And the political operatives that are selling this theatrical production ... their story is fiction. There are facts that are important in this case, and our police department is upholding the law.”

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 11

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NEWS

ALEX ZIELINSKI

>

In 2010, then-Mayor Julián Castro introduced a streamlined way to encourage new residential development in tourist-crowded downtown San Antonio. Called the Center City Housing Incentive Policy, the plan would waive city and San Antonio Water System fees for new downtown developments with 16 housing units per acre or redeveloped historic or industrial buildings with 8 housing units per acre.

Developers who included “structured parking” or retail space into their residential project could even qualify for forgivable loans. The goal was to create 7,500 housing units in downtown by 2020.

On the surface, the plan worked. In the following five years, long-empty lots sprouted colorful apartment buildings and abandoned industrial blocks were revived with hip restaurants and retail spaces. But, while the 64 incentivized projects (with 6,543 housing units total) brought new life to the quiet city center, they catered toward wealthier, upperclass residents. The Cevallos Lofts, 1221 Broadway Lofts, the Pearl Can Plant, Steel House Lofts — these “luxury” apartments and condos built with city tax write-offs all come with rents and mortgages above the city’s average rates.

Currently, San Antonio’s rental average dances around $1.07 per square foot, per month. The cheapest studio at the Pearl Can Plant is $1.71 per square foot, according to Zillow.com records. Same goes for the cheapest apartments as 1221 Broadway ($2 per square foot), Steel House Lofts ($1.79 per square foot), Cevallos Lofts ($1.69 per square foot), and the brand-new Jones & Rio ($2.25 per square foot).

As the revived city center brings in higher-paying renters, it’s also booted long time lower-income residents out of their newly-expensive neighborhoods.

This unexpected side effect has prompted Mayor Ron Nirenberg to pump the breaks.

At the Jan. 11 City Council meeting, Nirenberg proposed the city pause the incentive program for six months to reevaluate its long-term impact on all of the city’s residents. The council approved.

“We’ve accomplished one of the goals of the project, which was to jumpstart development downtown and increase housing,” Nirenberg told the Current. “That said, if the council knew what we know now about rising housing costs and property values, we may have included an affordable housing component to the plan.”

Nirenberg has known the CCHIP program has its faults. He can remember talking with Castro about it a few years back, after the former mayor became Secretary of Housing and Urban Development under President Obama.

“I remember him telling me it was time to throttle back, that it was evident we needed more discretion in the process,” Nirenberg recalled.

After entering the mayor’s office in June 2017 with the promise of equity-focused development, Nirenberg began having coversations with planning experts and community members concerned with the dwindling affordable housing options in the city’s center. And then, last week, he pulled the plug.

That’s not to say developers can’t submit applications for incentivized plans to the city in the next six months — but they have to get the entire City Council to sign off on the plan instead of just the city’s development department.

According to John Jacks, director of the Center City Development Office (which oversees CCHIP), the timing couldn’t be better. The program, which has doled out over $97 million in incentives, was set to expire in June and, Jacks said, there’s not enough money left in the pot to fund another development anyway.

“This pause gives us time to internally review the program and ask questions like, ‘What would it look like to include affordability into the project?’ and ‘Could a market rate project survive downtown without funding?’” Jacks said.

Developers, of course, aren’t as pleased with the pause. Several have commented on how sky-high construction rates in downtown San Antonio have made it hard for them to include affordable housing units in their projects.

It’s just not financially wise.

“I can understand their concern,” Nirenberg said. “Policymakers have identified the rock and a hard place.”

The Mayor’s Housing Policy Task Force (created by Nirenberg shortly after his election) has been tasked with finding a happy medium — a way to increase affordable housing options downtown without making developers broke in the process. He suspects the city’s lengthy development approval process may have something to do with the problem.

With under 1,000 housing units left before meeting Castro’s 2020 goal, the city has a choice to make. That’s why, according to Nirenberg: “Everything’s on the table.”

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CALENDAR

CALENDAR

WED

17

In the Footsteps of Marco Polo

An official DreamWeek event, this free film screening will be followed by a panel discussion and Q&A with students who have traveled the world with Summer of Service, a local organization that looks to “educate San Antonio youth through community service (service-learning) and travel abroad.”

WED The documentary itself, released in 2008, follows adventurersturned-documentarians Denis Belliveau and Francis O’Donnell as they “retrace Marco Polo’s entire 25,000-mile, land-and-sea route from Venice to China and back.” Through the course of the breathtaking and deeply empathetic 90-minute film, which fuses shots from their journey with quotations from Polo’s own descriptions of his, the two learn a great deal about themselves and discover that travel can serve as a kind of antidote to xenophobia and bigotry. Free but reservations required at klrn.org/events, 6-9pm, Alamo Drafthouse Park North, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 677-8500, drafthouse.com. — James Courtney FILM

Confluence Park Grand Unveiling Celebration With a name that references its location at the meeting point of the San Antonio River and the San Pedro Creek, Confluence Park smartly rises from a city-owned lot formerly used to store construction vehicles.

Commissioned by the San Antonio River Foundation (SARF) and designed by Lake | Flato Architects, Matsys, and Rialto Studio, the park features an education center with an eco-friendly roof, gardens dedicated to native plants, a dramatic, 30-foot-tall concrete pavilion that doubles as a massive water catchment system, and easy access to hiking, biking and kayaking along the Mission Reach. On Wednesday, the San Antonio River Authority joins SARF for the unveiling of the “landmark project where culture, education, ecology and recreation meet.” Free, 10:30am-noon, Confluence Park, 310 W. Mitchell St. (shuttle service from event parking at Mission Concepción Sports Complex, 714 E. Theo Ave.), (210) 224-2694, confluencepark. sariverfound.org. — Bryan Rindfuss SPECIAL EVENT

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THU

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‘Common Currents’

Easily among the most anticipated aspects of San Antonio’s Tricentennial celebration, “Common Currents” is an innovative exhibition series uniting 300 artists — each of whom were tasked with creating work inspired by a single year in our city’s rich history. Employing an unpredictable, artist-driven format, the sprawling project allowed six venues (Artpace, Blue Star Contemporary, Southwest School of Art, Guadalupe Cultural Arts Center, Carver Community Cultural Center and the Mexican Cultural Institute) to each enlist two artists; that initial group of 12 followed suit, with each artist inviting two peers — and so on until a total of 300 were on board. Admittedly, this “chain letter-inspired” framework puts artists in the driver’s seat to “make decisions that may traditionally be the role of the organization or curator.” First up to bat in a chronological string of reveals, Artpace is set to unveil a 48-person group show focused on San Antonio’s first half century (1718-1767). Taking over the institution’s Hudson Showroom, the exhibition comprises works from Mark Menjivar, Julie Ledet, Michele Monseau, Mari Hernandez, Laura Mijangos, Katie Pell, Karen Mahaffy, Raul Gonzalez and Ramin Samandari, among many others. Opening in tandem in Artpace’s Main Space, local artist John Medina’s solo show “The Sunset Belongs to Us” invites visitors into a recording booth to share cherished Alamo City stories to be amplified on the street with a large-scale drip painting of the San Antonio sunset as a backdrop. Free, 6-8pm (on view through March 4), Artpace, 445 N. Main Ave., (210) 212-4900, artpace.org. — BR ART

PRESENTS

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JANUARY 25 CLICK HERE FOR TICKETS

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PBS

SAN ANTONIO RIVERWALK FOUNDATION

OUR TOP PICKS FOR THE WEEK

CALENDAR

Texas history buffs and music lovers alike should find themselves delighted by this offering from soprano Flicka Rahn and pianist/lecturer Ruth Friedberg. Presented, like so many quality offerings already this year, as a part of the celebration of San Antonio’s 300th birthday, the evening of song and story will look at the role of women (of all backgrounds) in our city’s development and culture. A diverse journey, as it must be to achieve what it sets out to, the program will begin with a Native American love song before exploring music with Spanish, German and French roots. From classical compositions to spirituals and cowboy ballads of the Southwest, from corridos to European folk music and everything in between, this program promises a rich look at our unique cultural heritage. $10, 7:30-9pm, University of the Incarnate Word, 4301 Broadway, (210) 920-0730, artsongduo.com.

THU — JC

A Formula for the Future & The Foreign Arm

MUSIC + TALKS PLUS

TEDDY OH SO

PBS

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In a unique pairing of spoken word, discussion and music, poet/activist/singer Andrea “Vocab” Sanderson (The Foreign Arm) will co-host a DreamWeek event that acts as a musical and discursive thrust toward hope. Part narrative, part concert, and part open dialogue, it promises to be a particularly uplifting, boundary-eschewing option. $10, 8-10:30pm, Carmens de la Calle, 320 N. Flores St., (210) 281-4349, dreamweek.org. — JC MUSIC

THU

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Digital Inclusion This DreamWeek panel brimming with local leaders, internet service providers and organizations will go over the importance of internet access in San Antonio, and what it means to be a “digitally inclusive community.” Hosted by the brand-new Upgrade SA, an organization started in 2017 to help working adults return to school or finish their degrees, the panel will discuss achieving citywide digital inclusion for all residents, and why universal internet connectivity is an important resource to improve education and provide more career opportunities for all. Free, 4-6pm, Las Palmas Library, 515 Castroville Road, (210) 207-9200, dreamweek.org. — Lyanne A. Guarecuco

ART SONG DUO

TALKS PLUS

19 UPGRADE SA

The Texas Woman: Her Heritage in Song

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SAN ANTONIO MUSIC SHOWCASE SAT, SEPT. 29

THURS, APR. 26

FRI, AUG. 24

SAT, MAY 26

Sell Your Event Tickets 16

CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

THURS, MAR. 22

VIP ENTRY 6 PM • GA ENTRY 7 PM - END 10PM SAN ANTONIO MUSEUM OF ART

UNITED WE BRUNCH SAT, JUN. 9

SAN ANTONIO BEER FESTIVAL SAT, OCT. 20 • VIP ENTRY 12 PM

GA ENTRY 1:30 PM • END 6:30PM DIGNOWITY & LOCKWOOD PARKS

COCKTAIL: THE EVENT FRI, JULY. 27

DULCE

FRI, DEC. 7

On Localculturetickets.com And Get Free Promotion In The Current

Call 210-388-0606 For More Info

Restaurant Weeks is a two-week food extravaganza highlighting the food scene in San Antonio –

so grab your reservations now for the biggest celebration of dining. More than 100 restaurants serving up prix-fixe three-course lunches and dinners for guests to savor.

EAT OUT GIVE BACK:

Your meal is charitable with

$1 from each lunch & $2 from each dinner supporting the programs of Culinaria.

JANUARY 15-27

VISIT CULINARIASA.ORG FOR ALL EVENT DETAILS OR FACEBOOK + INSTA + TWITTER: @CULINARIASA

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 17

RON COMSTOCK

18 CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

CALENDAR NIGHTLIFE

Mister Sister Leather

If you’ve spent much time in the LGBT nightlife scene, or perhaps attended the annual Pride Bigger Than Texas Parade and Festival, it’s quite likely you’ve spotted the elaborately costumed San Antonio Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence — a “modern, communal order of 21st-century nuns dedicated to community service, fundraising, outreach, advocacy, education for safer sex awareness, and to promoting human rights, respect for diversity and spiritual enlightenment.” Dolled up in flamboyant habits, caked in makeup, topped with crowns and often equipped with parasols, the benevolent Sisters proudly employ “humor and irreverent wit to expose the forces of bigotry, complacency and guilt that chain the human spirit.” Launched in 2016, the organization’s Mister Sister Leather competition invites leather daddies to strut their stuff and be judged by a panel in the categories of closed-door personal interview, bar wear, leather formal wear, SAT jock wear, and Q&A. After inheriting the title from Cat Artemis, Mister Sister Leather 2017, this year’s winner will go on to compete in Mr. Third Coast Leather and make “a minimum of five public appearances as MSLSA at gay male fetish events within San Antonio and surrounding areas throughout Texas.” Emceed by Dallas-based Sister Lawana Jocqui and Lipps La Rue, the event also includes handcrafted leather goods for purchase from House of MarKus and Mooing Penguin Studios, entertainment by local performers, and the presentation of funds raised in 2017 for Thrive Youth Center and Project HOT. Free, welcome hour at 6pm, contest at 7pm, SA Country Saloon, 10127 Coachlight St., (210) 525-0915, sanantoniosisters.org. — BR

RON COMSTOCK

SPECIAL EVENT

20

Bill Maher From Kathy Griffin’s cringeworthy photo-op depicting the fake severed head of President Trump, to Stephen Colbert referring to the President as “Putin’s cock holster,” 2017 saw no shortage of comedians willing to cross the line of decency, nearly derailing their careers in the process. Enter Bill Maher. In June, the comedian and political commentator shockingly referred to himself as a “house nigger” during an interview with Senator Ben Sasse on his late-night HBO talk show Real Time with Bill Maher. Drawing scorn from millions of viewers (some of whom called for his cancellation), both Maher and HBO issued an apology for the unfortunate gaffe. It was a SAT rare moment of humility, considering the comedian has rarely apologized in a decades-long career mired in controversy.

Drawing ire from conservatives and progressives alike, Maher continues at the helm of his long-running talk show and brings his stand-up routine, An Evening with Bill Maher, to The Majestic on Saturday. $35-$95, 8pm, The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-3333, majesticempire.com. — Marco Aquino

SHOP RARE MARKET PLACE

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Shop Rare Marketplace

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Since its launch in 2016, Shop Rare Marketplace has treated San Antonio’s vintage enthusiasts to an array of events that smartly combine old-school treasure hunting with live music, creative photo ops and edible treats of the vegan variety. Gathering wares from nearly 30 vendors (including retro apparel, home decor and ephemera from The Mermaid Farm, “reclaimed” duds from Houston-based Maw Supply, plus-size styles from Shop Massive Curves and “premium vintage streetwear” from Clutch City Classics), Shop Rare’s first outing of 2018 sees the operation relocating from Southtown to the St. Mary’s Strip for an all-ages, pet-friendly, SUN “curated shopping experience” complete with complimentary drinks provided by Austin Eastciders and Topo Chico. Free with RSVP, noon-6pm, 2121 N. St. Mary’s St., facebook.com/ shopraremarketplace.

— BR SPECIAL EVENT

The Austin Baroque Orchestra takes on the story of famous frenemies Frederick the Great and François-Marie Arouet (better known by his nom de plume, Voltaire). Known as a man of military might, Frederick also famously patronized the arts and was himself an accomplished flautist. His love SUN of poetry and philosophy first drew him to Voltaire, and soon sparked a decades-long relationship between the two men. When Freddie Met Frankie tracks their trajectory from budding bromance to rancorous breakup and ultimate reconciliation, featuring music by composers whom Frederick employed or admired, including J.S. and C.P.E. Bach, Johann Adolf Hasse, and Jirí Antonín Benda, interspersed with readings from correspondence between the two men. $10-$30, 4pm, Mission Concepción, 807 Mission Road, (210) 932-1001, austinbaroqueorchestra.org. — Kelly Merka Nelson MUSIC

BA

20

When Freddie Met Frankie

ST IN

DAVID BECKER

COMEDY

Spurs vs. Cavaliers

TUE LeBron James renews his one-man rivalry with the Spurs this week, flanked by some familiar faces that have relocated to Cleveland. The Cavaliers rocked the NBA landscape this summer, trading All-Star Kyrie Irving to the Boston Celtics for sparkplug Isaiah Thomas and swingman Jae Crowder. Cleveland then signed former league MVP Derrick Rose, who took a 90 percent pay cut to join the Cavs, and followed that move by acquiring LeBron’s running mate in Miami, Dwyane Wade, a former NBA Finals MVP. Despite an abundance of veteran talent, it’s been a bumpy season for Cleveland, who trails Boston in the standings by a handful of games. The Cavs recently welcomed Thomas back from an extended layoff due to injury, and are seeking continuity of their own. San Antonio is no stranger to the injury bug, with Kawhi Leonard, Tony Parker and Rudy Gay struggling through assorted maladies of their own. With the Spurs at less than full strength, expect James and Wade to excel in a revenge game. $63-$2,632.00, 7pm, AT&T Center, One AT&T Center Pkwy., (210) 444-5000, attcenter.com. — M. Solis SPORTS

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CALENDAR

ART Art opening: “Nobleman of Consequence” Local designer Rocio

Bodevin presents a fashion collection inspired by Oscar Wilde and William Shakespeare. Free, 7-9:30pm Thursday; AnArte Gallery, 7959 Broadway, (210) 826-5674.

Art Out: Explain it with Emojis SAMA

hosts a discussion about works in the contemporary galleries using emojis and then invites guests to follow the crowd to The Modernist for cocktails. $5-$15, 7:30-8:30pm Friday; San Antonio Museum of Art, 200 W. Jones Ave., (210) 978-8100.

Art to Lunch: African-American Artists In partnership with DreamWeek, SAMA sheds light on works by African American artists. $5 (free for members), 12:30-1pm Thursday; San Antonio Museum of Art, 200 W. Jones Ave., (210) 978-8100.

Artist Talk with Hiromi Stringer Local

artist Hiromi Stringer speaks at the Southwest School of Art in conjunction with “Umeyama Time Teleportation Museum,” an exhibition that “seeks to re-see and find alternative meanings for quotidian objects in her personal environment.” Free, 5-6pm Monday; Southwest School of Art, 1201 Navarro St., (210) 200-8200.

Culture & Couture: A Contemporary Fashion Exploration Fashion Week

San Antonio creators guide guests through a DreamWeek exhibition showcasing the work of Nigerianborn designer Esé Azénabor. $27 at eventbrite.com, 7-9pm Wednesday; Southwest School of Art, Coates Chapel, 300 Augusta St., (210) 200-8200.

“Incite” Closing Party The Linda Pace

Foundation partners with DreamWeek to close “Incite” (a group show uniting artists Rivane Neuenschwander, Chuck Ramirez, Hills Snyder, Frances Stark, Cheyney Thompson and Diana Thater) with a reception featuring music by DJ Despeinada, craft cocktails and light bites. Free, 7pm Wednesday; SPACE, 111 Camp St., (210) 227-8400.

The Artist as Culture Producer: Living and Sustaining a Creative Life Blue Star Contemporary welcomes Sharon Louden and “Home Bodies” exhibiting artist Lenka Clayton for a conversation about how artists sustain their practice and their greater societal role. $3-$5, 6-8pm Saturday; Blue Star Contemporary, 116 Blue Star, (210) 2276960.

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CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

FILM The ‘Burbs Video Dungeon Theatre returns

to Oak Hills Tavern with a free outdoor screening of the The Burbs, a 1989 dark comedy starring Tom Hanks, Bruce Dern, Corey Feldman and the late great Carrie Fisher. Free, 9pm-midnight Thursday; Oak Hills Tavern, 7920 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 614-8855.

I Am Jane Doe The Rape Crisis Center

presents a free DreamWeek screening of filmmaker Mary Mazzio’s 2017 documentary I Am Jane Doe. Narrated

by Jessica Chastain, the film chronicles the epic battle that several American mothers are waging on behalf of their middle-school daughters, victims of sex trafficking on the classified advertising website Backpage.com. Free, 6-9pm Thursday; Alamo Drafthouse Park North, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 677-8500.

Mary and the Witch’s Flower GKIDS and

Fathom Events team up for the premiere of Oscar nominee Hiromasa Yonebayashi’s action-packed anime film recounting the stirring, heartfelt story of a young girl trying to find her place in the world. $12.50, English dubbed at 7pm, subtitled at 8pm Thursday; Santikos Bijou (4522 Fredericksburg Road); Santikos Silverado (11505 N Loop 1604 W); Santikos Embassy (13707 Embassy Row); fathomevents.com.

What Is Justice? Texas Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty hosts a DreamWeek event combining a screening of the thought-provoking animated short The Last 40 Miles (about a man’s journey from death row to the death chamber) and a dialogue with filmmaker Alex Hannaford and TCADP Executive Director Kristin Houlé. Free, 6pm Thursday; Our Lady of the Lake University, Chapel Auditorium, 411 SW 24th St., (210) 434-6711.

THEATER A Bright New Boise You’d think the seed for the Rapture would be planted somewhere with a bit more gravitas, but there it is: the beige walls, gurgling coffee maker, and chipped formica counters of the Hobby Lobby break room. Fleeing a scandal at his Evangelical church, Will joins the staff, who faces the not-sot-trivial task of fulfilling foul-mouthed manager Pauline’s corporate dictums. All the while, under the buzz of fluorescent lights, someone has found the time to set the ball rolling on the Book of Revelation. What unfolds is a darkly comical portrait of modern faith in middle America, as each employee confronts issues of religion, forgiveness and second chances in an attempt to seek a place in this unyielding world. $10-

CALENDAR

$40, 7:30pm Thursday-Saturday, 2:30pm Sunday; The Playhouse, 800 W. Ashby Pl., (210) 733-7258.

Where Did We Sit on the Bus? Pulsing

with Latin rhythms, rap, hip-hop, spoken word, and live looping, Brian Quijada’s one-man show examines what it means to be Latino through the eyes of a child, turned teenager, turned adult, to answer the question: “Where do I fit in as a Latino millennial growing up in America?” $20$25, 9-10:30pm Saturday; The Playhouse, 800 W. Ashby Pl., (210) 733-7258.

WORDS Say What Now? Writers and poets from

across the city share narratives focusing on social justice issues in the tradition of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Free, 7pm Thursday; Central Library Auditorium, 600 Soledad St., (210) 207-2500.

Wendy Barker, Natalia Treviño, and George Wallace Esteemed New York-

based poet George Wallace reads from his work at The Twig alongside awardwinning San Antonian Wendy Barker and rising talent Natalia Trevino. Free, 6:30pm Saturday; The Twig Book Shop, 306 Pearl Pkwy., Suite 106, (210) 826-6411.

COMEDY Arnez J An Atlanta native who once played

with the Harlem Globetrotters, stand-up Arnez J is perhaps known best for his twoseason stint hosting BET’s Comic View and his 2013 Netflix special Racially Motivated. $25, 8pm & 10:15pm Friday-Saturday, 7pm Sunday; Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 541-8805

SPECIAL EVENTS Awesome SA Pitch Party Three finalists

pitch their awe-inspiring ideas for a chance to win a $1,000 “micro-grant.” Free, 6pm Thursday; Burleson Yard Beer Garden, 430 Austin St., (210) 354-3001.

Criss Angel: The Mindfreak Unplugged

and socialites, each representing a unique and integral facet of San Antonio culture. $50, 7-10pm Saturday; Charline McCombs Empire Theatre, 226 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 226-3333.

Monster Jam Sunday! Sunday! Sunday! (Or,

sure, Saturday also, but how often do you get to do the monster-truck-guy voice about an actual monster truck show happening on a “Sunday! Sunday! Sunday!”?) Witness some of the biggest damn trucks you ever saw in your life aggressively fighting for dominance like skunk apes in heat. Then after you’ve found a spot in the parking lot, head inside the Alamodome and watch 10,000 pound leviathans with names like El Toro Loco, War Wizard, and freaking Grave Digger give the owners of the jacked-up crew cabs outside brand new inferiority complexes, wreaking methanol-fueled havoc in races and audience-judged stunt competitions that are sure to produce veritable buttloads of both sound and fury. Might as well name one of those trucks “Little Pink Houses” because, as John Cougar Mellencamp sings, “ain’t that America?” $15-$169, 7pm Saturday, 3pm Sunday; Alamodome, 100 Montana St., (210) 207-3663.

TALKS PLUS All These Shoes: A Love Letter to Sneakers Described as a “personal journey

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from awkward preteen to semi-confident adult,” Norm Dawson’s DreamWeek presentation explores how his love of sneakers and hip-hop paved a path to selfacceptance despite bullying, peer pressure and depression. Free, 4-5pm Saturday; Cafe College, 131 El Paso St., (210) 207-4528.

The Evolution of Hip Hop San Antonio

Education Partnership presents a DreamWeek conversation on the evolution of hip-hip to unmask masculinity, and explore the genre’s use as a tool for social justice. Free, 2pm Saturday; Cafe College, 131 El Paso St., (210) 207-4528.

Las Vegas-based magician Criss Angel brings his TV series Mindfreak to life on stage with a blend of “mind-blowing illusions,” state-of-the-art animated LED projections, pyrotechnic landscapes and original music. $49.50-$99.50, 8pm Thursday; The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-3333.

Dreamweek Mayor’s Ball Closing Ceremony The Inaugural DreamWeek

Mayor’s Ball will be the finale event for the 2018 summit, featuring a showcase of San Antonio talent presented by the DreamVoice committee and selected by Mayor Ron Nirenberg. The showcase will include an array of noteworthy local musicians, leaders

MARCH 22

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Lineup subject to change without notice. Must be 21+ to participate.

22

CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

MARCH 22

AT&T CENTER

TICKETS ON SALE THIS FRIDAY | 800-745-3000 | TICKETMASTER.COM

COURTESY OF NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON

ARTS + CULTURE

k c e h C t u G c i t c a l a G JAM E S

≥

COU RTN

EY

Neil deGrasse Tyson is a blast of fresh and crisp air in the fetid stagnation of our historical/cultural moment. Tyson, who is a decorated, world-renowned astrophysicist, a prolific author (academic and general interest), the director of the Hayden Planetarium in New York City, a research associate with the Department of Astrophysics at the American Museum of Natural History, and a low-key pop-culture phenomenon, has, like some convivial, Socratic gadfly, seemingly taken on the dizzyingly tall task of talking some sense into the American public.

In addition to cool scientist shit, Tyson hosts TV shows like Fox’s Cosmos reboot and Nat Geo’s first late-night foray StarTalk, tours behind lectures geared for a general audience, does tons of podcasts and zany interviews with people like Tyler, the Creator, gets crunk with the willfully ignorant on Twitter, and generally puts himself and his large yet disarmingly warm personality out there.

to get u o y s t n son wa y T niverse e u s s e a h r t G e e s Neil d (becau r e h t e g t to t you) u o b a e r your shi ca doesn’t

His motivation is, at least in large part, to bring advanced science to the less-advanced masses, to encourage people to see themselves as part of the great and sublime mysteries of the universe, to educate, to provoke, to rouse — all with the goal of inspiring general audiences to take science seriously and to see it as approachable and worthwhile, which in turn could have a variety of positive, progressive effects on society. The scientific worldview, Tyson reminds us, can be a gateway to not only a more efficient world, but a more just world as well.

This week, Tyson will bring his latest talk, Cosmic Collision, to the Tobin Center. Like The Cosmic Perspective, the talk he delivered last year around this time, Cosmic Collision seeks to inject perspective into our thinking by reminding us of our insignificance in the universe and the particularly precarious position (in the cosmic sense) of life on Earth. The name Cosmic Collision, of course, is a literal reference to all the intergalactic

miscellany that’s just bound to bump into us at some point.

Sounds cheery, no?

While he will address logistics and creative innovations in the realm of preparedness for collision-based calamity, Tyson will also speak to his belief that seeing ourselves, our planet, our future in these terms can have a unifying and pragmatizing effect on us. After all, the petty things we find to hate each other over don’t seem worth investing much energy into in the face of being suddenly, and all as one, delivered into oblivion.

Neil deGrasse Tyson: Cosmic Collision Sold out ($246-$604 at vividseats.com), 7:30pm Wed, Jan. 17, Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, tobincenter.org.

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17101 La Cantera Pkwy | San Antonio, TX 78256 | (210) 310-3733 24

CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

SCREENS

CALL ME MAYBE? Coming-of-age gay romance Call Me

By Your Name is a cinematic vacation

SONY PICTURES CLASSICS

THADDEUS MCCOLLUM

≥

Nothing makes young love prettier than how much time has passed from it.

Distance bestows rose-colored glasses that blot out all of the dumb awkwardness and leave nothing but the warm, squishy feelings we associate with fledgling romance. Throw in a sumptuous Italian countryside summer, and you’ve got the basics of Call Me By Your Name, the latest film from Italian director Luca Guadagnino. The film has garnered praise for its stigma-free depiction of a homosexual romance

between two young men, Elio (Timothée Chalamet) and Oliver (Armie Hammer), and rightly so. The warmth of the love story manages to overcome some significant flaws with the film.

Set in the hot, languid summer of 1983, Call Me By Your Name follows Elio, a 17-year-old American, whose family is spending the summer at a northern Italian villa while his father (Michael Stuhlbarg), an archaeology professor, works on a manuscript and oversees an underwater dig nearby. Enter Oliver, his father’s grad student assistant.

Oliver is a consumptive force of nature. Tall and handsome, he’s constantly entering or leaving rooms, devouring food or dominating conversations. It’s not long before Elio’s initial revulsion to this “ugly American” turns to a voracious desire, though it takes the film about an hour to get there.

That indulgence in the pathetic fallacy – emphasizing the slow blossom of romance between the two leads by being slow itself — may stretch the patience of some viewers.

Thankfully, the snail’s pace of the film allows screenwriter James Ivory (adapting the 2007 novel of the same name by André Aciman) to fill the script with snappy dialogue and humorous vignettes. (The beautiful scenery of rural Italy, shot by Sayombhu Mukdeeprom, doesn’t hurt either.)

Chalamet’s performance as Elio in particular garners (almost) enough goodwill to offset the pacing problems. He hits that distinct teenage balance between cocky assuredness and bashful naïveté. Hammer, for his part, leverages all of the Ivy League entitlement smarm he showed playing the Winklevoss twins in The Social

Network, but manages to make it charming somehow.

Not charming, however, is how Elio and Oliver — and the film — tend to treat the female characters. Elio is carrying on a summer fling with fellow teenager Marzia (Esther Garrel) at the beginning of the film. Marzia obviously adores Elio, but he only seems to use her as an outlet for his conflicted feelings about Oliver. Once the Elio/Oliver ’ship starts sailing, he unceremoniously ghosts her and can only manage a half-hearted shrug when she confronts him. Oliver, meanwhile, seems to delight in leading on the smitten Chiara (Victoire Du Bois), and most of the scenes of his callous deception of her are played for laughs.

The sumptuous setting and complex performances can’t stave off the feeling that the film — like Elio and Oliver’s relationship — exists in a bubble. The multicultural, academic family of Elio — who speak at least four languages fluently and read medieval poetry to each other — are picture-perfect in every way. While it’s nice to see an accepting, loving family on film for once, the lack of qualms given about their teenage son developing a romantic relationship with a man nearly a decade older than him is sure to raise eyebrows. In fact, the only impediment to Elio and Oliver’s relationship seems to be the end of the season when Oliver has to return home, a predicament that doesn’t seem to reflect most gay love stories set in the era of AIDS and the Reagan administration. But maybe that’s the comfort that you get if your family can afford to use “summer” as a verb.

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CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

FOOD

FOOD COURT Picante Grill closes, Culinaria returns and more JESSICA ELIZARRARAS + SARAH MARTINEZ DANNY BATISTA

Broadway staple closes

El Mardi Gras returns

>San Antonio is as obsessed with Nawlins culture as ever and we can celebrate Mardi Gras with native New Orleans once more with the second El Mardi Gras block party on February 11 from 1-7 p.m.

Held last February in advance of Mardi Gras 2017, El Mardi Gras is put on by Susan and Pieter Sypesteyn of NOLA Brunch & Beignets, The Cookhouse and their nonprofit Third Coast Charities. Like last year, the event will bring together area chefs in celebrating the cuisine of the bayou with Sypesteyn repping Cookhouse, Jeff Balfour of Southerleigh, and Chris Cullum of Attagirl among some of the chefs slated to return.

The festival will include food vendors, art vendors, beer and daiquiris and Zydeco music (obviously). Though the event is free to attend, VIP tickets area available for $75 with “exclusive food and beverages in the VIP area along with comfortable seating and indoor restrooms” per the event’s website.

111 Kings Ct., elmardigras.org. — JE

N

R AI OR INE

Culinaria returns through January 27 >With dozens of restaurants taking part in Culinaria’s Restaurant Week this January (15-27), it’s hard to choose where you should dine. We’ve made the Culinaria experience a little easier for you by choosing our favorite menus that we think you shouldn’t miss available on sacurrent.com. And with most of these spots being on the more luxurious side (at least to your wallet), here’s the perfect chance to savor these dishes without breaking the bank. Make your reservations now, and don’t forget to enjoy both price tiers ($15/$35 for tier 1 and $10/$25 for tier 2).

Find the complete list of participating restaurants (it’s close to 100) at culinariasa.org. — SM

Krause’s Café & Biergarten hosts wine dinner

>Head to New Braunfels on January 29 at 6:30 p.m. for a taste of California-based Prisoner Wine Company, and a paired dinner by chef Boomer Acuna. The four-course prix fixe will feature braised beef cheek ravioli, smoked beef carpaccio, whole-roasted beef loin, and more. Each dish is paired with a complimentary wine such as Cuttings Cabernet, Saldo Zinfandel, and The Prisoner Red Blend.

Tickets, $70, are available by calling Krause’s.

186 S. Castell Ave., New Braunfels, (830) 625-2807.

— JE

Fazoli’s Italian Restaurant opens

>San Antonians that are fans of unlimited breadsticks will

SH

Pearl

MARKET

have another option with the opening of Fazoli’s this January 16. The Kentucky-based Italian franchise first opened in 1988 and currently has 217 restaurants across 26 states.

Menu items include prepared signature pastas, pizza, salads and oven-baked “Primo Submarinos” such as the turkey mozzarella fresco, of the meatball Da Vinci.

6170 I-10 E., fazolis.com. — JE

Wings & Beer Fest announces date

>After a ridiculously successful turn hosting Sunday Masa at Alamo Beer Co., Eg Collaborations is spreading their wings (pun certainly intended). The event company announced a Wings & Beer Fest on March 24 from noon to 4 p.m. Though vendors are still being added, wing nuts can expect to find Pinch Boil House & Bia Bar, Cullum’s Attagirl, The PigPen Bar, The Anchor Bar, Panda Brothers, Bexar Kitchens, Cow Tippin BBQ, Kettle King, Bird Dog Wings, Native Grill & Wings and Brewingz to be a part of the mix. The event will also feature a market with CRAVE Cookies, Poptopia Popsicles, BarbacoApparel, Pinot’s Palette, Jabanero Handmade Soaps, Monocled Mermaid, and Timothy McVain Art. Unlike Sunday Masa, this will be a ticketed event with attendees receiving wing tickets to sample, and each vendor offering full menu items for sale. Tickets ($25 online, $30 at the door, and $50 for VIP with 1 hour early admission, are available Saturday, January 20 through egcollaborations.com.

202 Lamar St. — JE

SATURDAYS 9AM - 1PM

SUNDAYS 10AM - 2PM

F R ES H • LO C A L • S E A SO N A L

ATPE ARL .COM

>Picante Grill will no longer be dishing out their prized enchiladas and interior Mexican fare. Owner Gonzalo Pozo told the San Antonio Express-News that he will now focus on his banquet and catering properties, Magnolia Gardens and Hacienda Santa Maria.

A note was posted on the restaurant’s entryway last week.

Picante Grill dished out Mexican fare for nearly two decades at its location across from the Witte Museum.

Pozo said some of the restaurant’s popular menu items will be available on the catering menu of his other businesses.

— SM

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CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

COURTESY OF HILMY

FOOD

HOMING IN ON THE RANGE Modern chophouse basics, the Dady way RON BECHTOL

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cross-cut fillet was resplendently salmon-colored and robustly flavored down to its nearly rare center. A slathering in optional-extra, uni-flavored butter only amplified the flavor.

We had actually ordered the butter for the strip steak — just in case, but no additional flavor enhancement was required. (Save the pricy foie gras with pickled blueberry topper for the dutiful tenderloin.) Some adjustment was nevertheless necessary, and it has to do with the joys of sharing. In an ideal world, all of a critic’s dining companions would, for example, prefer steak no more than medium rare. But in the real world, there are many qualities more important than degree-of-doneness compatibility. As a necessary part of this discussion, our attentive waiter took matters into his own hands and had the kitchen split the steak before grilling. Compromise avoided. My portion, a perfect medium-rare, got most of the fat, but the rest was so good I’m not complaining. No, really.

Joining creamed spinach in the steak house standards department, the dessert menu does have the obligatory cheesecake — albeit white chocolate in this case. Alas, we may have avoided it at our peril. Sharing again, we picked the slightly iconoclastic Mississippi Mud Pie and found it not at all pie-like. More like a cold mess of crunchy parts that should have been cakey, mousse-like parts that might have been denser, Nutella that got lost … sorry, I didn’t understand this one. But then dessert is rarely needed at a steak house anyway —even an inventive, Dady-tweaked take.

COURTESY OF HILMY

Jason Dady and group didn’t change much in their transformation of the former Luke into steak-centric Range (FYI, there are now four high-end steak houses within a three-block span of East Houston alone — just saying): the bar, for example, retains not only its punishingly uncomfortable top but even keeps the same, rattan-like barstools. Some wallpaper has been added, a little deep blue paint has been applied, and there’s some new, home-on-the-range appropriate art.

As there’s nothing that could be done about the intrusive elevator shaft and the dining space’s effective ignoring of the river, what you had before is essentially what you still get. At least architecturally.

The menu is, of course, another story. To be sure, there are steaks — but only four of them: a dry-aged New York strip, a sirloin “culotte” (the cap muscle of a top sirloin), a tenderloin filet, and an 18-ounce ribeye. Grilled Korean short ribs, pan-roasted chicken, Texas quail, bacon-wrapped pork tenderloin, and four seafood dishes, including a luxurioussounding (and priced) lobster pot pie, round out the mains.

Creamed spinach rears its knee-jerk, steak house head in the sides column.

But you’d never find a Wagyu beef hot pot on the appetizer list of a traditional steak house. And there are also the likes of pan-seared gnocchi and smoked gouda cauliflower gratin among the family-sized sides. Then there is the already somewhat notorious, tableside Caesar salad.

Early stories had service coming to a screeching halt while staff tried to deal with multiple orders of the famous dish. But as currently tossed by sommelier/Caesar steward John Roussin, formerly of Il Sogno and High Street Wine Bar, the process is smooth — it was his 16th of the night, he confided. In a departure from tradition, Range uses Little Gem lettuce instead of romaine. This isn’t necessarily heresy, though chopping the compact head results in a less pretty presentation. The meticulously made dressing employs the traditional egg and anchovy, offbeat kewpie Japanese mayo, and, specifically mentioned, EVOO from the annoyingly ubiquitous Rachael Ray. The result of all this is a mountainous serving, more than enough for two, in which the dressing, for all the care put into its preparation, lacks snap, and the croutons emerge as a star ingredient. Sea salt was requested.

If additional salt seemed necessary in the salad, less of it might have been appreciated in the tender orzo (a seedshaped pasta) with grated cacio cheese and pepe—the bowl seemed to swing between salty and cheesy, always with the strong back beat of black pepper. Still, we appreciated its cheek. But we absolutely loved the crispy fried Brussels sprouts with mellow blood orange gastrique. Bring ‘em on in even greater quantities.

Service started out slow for a weekday night, but picked up the pace after the arrival of the black pepper meatballs with parmesan, tomato jam, burrata and rapini pesto. If that sounds like a lot of ingredients it’s because one or two (the cold tomato jam, for example), might easily have been omitted — especially if that meant paying more attention to the meatballs themselves: tasty as they were, they arrived dry and overcooked. There was no complaining whatsoever about the degree of doneness of the two mains.

Because staff couldn’t come up with a convincing, agreed-upon definition or provenance (we know practically down to the zip code where the beef comes from), let’s first discuss King Ora salmon. King Ora? Turns out it’s farmraised in New Zealand, and it further surprises in that Ora is on Monterey Bay Aquarium’s good-guy list — even above some wild options. Bland taste is another usual reason for avoiding farmed, but not in this case. Though utterly naked and alone on a large (but handsome) plate, the roasted,

Range 125 E. Houston St. 78205, (210 ) 227-4455 The Skinny: Range replaces Crescent-City-centric Lüke with chef Jason Dady’s take on a classic chophouse with added seafood options. Turf and surf are well-represented, with both the NY strip and salmon beautifully executed. Some sides and appetizers don’t rise to the level of the mains, but crispy-fried Brussels sprouts are killer, and the tableside Caesar is worth a shot for two. Best Bets: Tableside Caesar, dry-aged NY Strip, King Ora salmon, crispy fried Brussels sprouts Hours: 11am-10pm Prices: $27-$52 for entrees daily

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 29

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NIGHTLIFE

Spirited Know-How Seminars, new spirits still reigned supreme during this year’s San Antonio Cocktail Conference

RON BECHTOL

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COURTESY OF SINGANI 63

San Antonio does know how to throw a party, and the organizers of the San Antonio Cocktail Conference are no exception.

The all-out evening events are especially badass. Film director Steven Soderbergh, in town to promote a Bolivian brandy (more on that later), characterized the SACC as a “fiesta” when compared to another well-known conference he felt was a more of a “market.” Go team!

But for many, the heart of the event lies in the seminars, and this year’s selection and presenters seemed to be even better and more varied than in previous years. I made it to seven in two days (don’t try this unless you’re truly obsessed) — and that doesn’t include a long scotch-tasting interview (more on this, too, later) and quicky one-on-one talks with brand ambassadors at the tasting suites where multiple products were presented. Here’s a quick overview.

Designing and Branding was a presentation that, as an architect, I wish all my bar (and restaurant) clients could have attended; it would help all of us to hone in on how best to present a product (through menu and other design), how to implement change, and how to “brand” one’s business in all ways from logo to “merch” and “swag.” We all need a little swag.

Regionality Within Oaxaca targeted mezcal, its amazingly varied sources and production methods, the physical and cultural environment that shapes its character, and, especially, the “hand of the maker” that informs the final product from harvest to bottling. (That hand is sometimes female, BTW.) We sampled four Vago mezcales, each almost totally different, along with three “uncertified” (i.e. unlabeled) renditions brought to the conference

by Emma Janzen, Digital Content Editor at Imbibe magazine and author of Mezcal: The History, Craft & Cocktails of the World’s Ultimate Spirit You’ll Artisanal Spirit. get even more info out of the book. The accompanying spirits you’ll have to supply yourself.

Mexican Denominations of Origin: An Educational Journey Through Spirits and Flavors may sound like a pedantic college lecture series one had to take for credit, but it was far from that. That we tasted several agave-based spirits, from tequila, mezcal, bacanora and sotol to the relatively new cane-based charanda from a mere 16 municipalities in Michoacan, didn’t hurt.

But the knowledgeable (and opinionated) panel interacting with an equally engaged

audience assured that what might have been a dry discussion of production methods and geographic limits turned into an impassioned polemic on cultural identity. Who knew?

Japanese Shochu Meets Western Mixology — say what? I was totally ignorant of Japan’s most popular spirit, one that can be made from ingredients as diverse as rice, barley, dates, and sweet potato. Turns out there are three main styles that are mostly low-alcohol and ranging in taste from light and vodka-like to bold, many with a floral or citrus component. Two cocktails were presented (one pairing shochu with gin, the other with Calvados), and both were delightful. Unless a local bar is doing this under the radar, for the moment we’ll all have to run up to Austin. The presenter suggested Kemuri Tatsu-ya, Komé and Soto (his bar program).

Sherry 101: This should be obligatory for anyone interested in the entire category of spirit-fortified wines. Yes, the presenter took us through the history and production of sherry, but it was the side-by side comparison of all styles, from the bracingly dry fino and manzanilla to the unctuous Pedro Ximenez, that was both key and revealing. This kind of experience is hard to have at any local bar or restaurant, (though Chad Carey of Barbaro and Hot Joy has long championed sherries on his bar menus); if it’s presented again next year, sign up — and encourage your favorite bartender to investigate the further use of sherry in cocktails.

The Wide World of Brandy proved to be wider than most of us think, with fruit as the unifying factor. America’s first, for example, was apple-based, and that company, Laird’s, is still with us. Who’d a thought that pisco, a grape-based brandy, was popular in California during Gold Rush days, as it was cheaper to bring it up the coast from Peru and Chile than to ship French brandies (or maybe even applejack) across the country from the East Coast. The rakias of Balkan Europe, commonly made from plums, quince, and apricot, in addition to grapes, have been popular for centuries in their countries of origin, but are just now making headway in the States. (Locally distilled Kinsman, for

example, is apricot-based.) Yes, there were samples, including one from Kentucky’s Copper & Kings, a label that assembles grape-based brandies from other producers then ages them primarily in used bourbon barrels. My notes are getting just a little illegible at this point.

But wait, there’s more. Singani63: Elevate your Cocktail was presented by film director/producer Steven Soderbergh and his team. Yes, singani is another grape (specifically Muscat of Alexandria) brandy produced at high altitude in, wait for it, Bolivia. Soderbergh fell for the spirit when there filming Che, and has since built up a company to produce and promote it worldwide. Though singani producers don’t like to be compared to pisco from Peru and Chile, comparisons are inevitable. On the basis of two cocktails served at Haunt after the presentation (which included, naturally, a short film), I’d say singani excels as a drinks base where its floral qualities can be exploited.

As a kind of reward for all this drinking — more drinking. I had the opportunity to sit down with David Allardice, brand ambassador (the job we all really want) for Glenfiddich single malt Scotch which calls itself “the world’s most awarded single malt Scotch whisky.” It’s also a company that is doing serious experimentation with ageing in barrels other than ex-bourbon, port and sherry (which, in turn, may have once held bourbon). Ice wine barrels, for example. I admit to being especially skeptical of one that was finished in a barrel that once held heavily hopped IPA — yes, beer. But the hops merely gave the spirit a dry, floral quality. Even more appealing to me was another bottle labeled Project XX, a blend selected by all the company’s brand ambassadors, fermented longer than usual to yield a fruitier quality, then aged in bourbon, sherry and port barrels. It was full-bodied and simply gorgeous. Look for it at around $70-$80.

Now comes the part where you really want my job. Allardice then produced a taste of 30-year single malt that retails, if you could find it, for around $700. Yes, it was sublime. sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 31

JAPANESE STYLE GASTROPUB

Join us for a 5 course sake dinner Thursday, Feb. 8 Experience chef-made dishes paired with:

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WHAT'S BREWING Nightlife openings, parties and more JESSICA ELIZARRARAS | @JESSELIZARRARAS

Saturday, January 20

Beer with Blake // Coffee and cigars collide at The Point Park & Eats during this laid-back seminar that will feature two coffee samples of locally roasted Quantum Coffee Roasters, one specialty cigar by San Antonio Hard Goods, beer knowledge by Blake Murrah, and two NFL Playoffs // There are only a few weeks of football nine-ounce pours of Buffalo Bayou Brewing Company’s left this season. Enjoy all the action on Blue Box’s giant Sweater Weather Belgian quad and Oak Highlands Brewery’s Derelict IPA. $20 at the bar, 6pm, 24188 Boerne screen this Sunday and stay for complimentary chili, cornbread and drink specials. Prices vary, 4pm, 312 Pearl Stage Road, (210) 251-3380.

Pkwy., (210) 227-2583.

UFC 220 Watch Party // Little Woodrow’s (both locations) will feature the match between Heavyweight Tuesday, January 23 champion Stipe Miocic and Francis Ngannou. No cover, Fried Chicken & Champagne Night // Your Tuesdays multiple locations, 5pm-midnight, littlewoodrows.com. don’t have to suck. Head downtown for grower Champagne paired with chef Brooke Smith’s hand-dipped, organic fried chicken at Downstairs at Esquire Tavern. Buy a glass of Sunday, January 21 select bubbles and get two pieces of fried chicken, or buy a Royal-Tea Tea Time // If you’re low-key trying to get bottle and get four pieces (or more depending on the bottle over your crush on Prince Harry in advance of his May size). Prices vary, 5-11:30pm, 155 E. Commerce St., (210) wedding to the gorgeous Meghan Markle, you can still feel 222-2521. like a royal at Paramour. The rooftop bar is hosting cream tea (11am-2pm) and afternoon tea (2-5pm) with available pastries and finger sandwiches by Jason Dady. “Royal-Tea” Thursday, January 25 packages are also available with English sparkling wine, or Community Market // Ranger Creek and Hoppy Champagne, because this is a bar after all. $25-$40 for Monk San Antonio are helping to spread local goods to one, or $50-$80 for two, 11am-5pm, 102 9th St., Suite the area’s Northside with a collection of businesses and 400, (210) 340-9880. artists including Cigar Pointe, Winding Road Provisions, Sensa Float, Mobile Om Yoga, Freedom Solar Power, Cocktail Hunt // Still need to whet your whistle after this Jeremy Banas, Hoppy Dog Treats, She’s Crafty: Talk on Tap, year’s San Antonio Cocktail Conference? Take this selfBarbacoApparel, Lucio Tailoring Co., Simone Schiffmacher, guided tour/photo scavenger hunt through the San Antonio Shanna Kershner, and Markus Ferris. Prices vary, 6-10pm, Botanical Garden. Collect images and show them to the The Hoppy Monk, 1010 N. 1604 E., (210) 545-3330. house bartender who will serve you the corresponding cocktail. $18 members, $20 nonmembers, 12:30-3pm, Justin Timberlake Tribute // San Antonio may be one 555 Funston Pl., (210) 536-1400, sabot.org. of the cities snubbed by the Man of the Woods Tour, but it

COURTESY OF LITTLE WOODROWS

Groove House Grand Opening // Expect throwback jams from San Antonio’s first “throwback bar” when it officially opens this Saturday. Owned by DJ A-MAR née Adrian Martinez, Groove House offers several signature cocktails and shots, all named after old school slogans like “Boo-Ya” made with gin, vodka, white rum, peach schnapps, blue Curacao and Red Bull, and shots such as the Tootsie Roll, mixed with vodka, Kamora liqueur and orange juice. A full menu of wings, nachos, tacos and loaded fries is also available. Prices vary, 4pm-2am, 12333 West Ave., (210) 598-2083.

doesn’t mean we love JT any less. Industry pays homage to the youngest member of NSYNC with everything Justin from Justified to the 20/20 Experience, along with the best of the nineties and aughts and $1 mixed drinks all night. No cover for adults, $10 for minors 18+, 10pm-2am, 8021 Pinebrook Drive, (210) 374-2765.

Friday, January 26

Book signing // Big Hops Huebner will host local beer writer Jeremy Banas as he signs copies of his latest, “Pearl: A History of San Antonio’s Iconic Beer.” Free with book purchase, 6-8pm, 11224 Huebner Road, Suite 204, (210) 877-9663.

Happy Hour Market // La Botanica will feature vegan vendors offering skin care, original jewelry designs and animal advocates during their “Vegan Things” market happy hour. Prices vary, 4-7pm, 2911 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 716-0702.

Sunday, January 27

Coffee Beer + Donuts // The best part of being an adult is enjoying yourself whenever you please, and that means enjoying Ranger Creek Brewing & Distilling’s seasonal coffee beer, Sunday Morning Coming Down, in coffee mugs and pairing them with Art of Donut pastries.

Stop in for coffee mug specials and pours, beermosas, bloody marys and micheladas. Prices vary, noon-4pm, 4834 Whirlwind Drive, (210) 339-2282. sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 33

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CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

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CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

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BOOTS, BOOGIE & HONKY TONK with Dale Watson FRI., JAN 19 • 8PM • ALL AGES

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CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

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MATTHEW LOGAN VASQUEZ OF DELTA SPIRIT

MUSIC PICKS

Probably best known as the frontman for the indie group Delta Spirit, Austinite Matthew Logan Vasquez’s solo work has a vintage pop meets rustic rock vibe that was surprisingly endearing since half the new shit we hear from the indie rock world lately sounds like a direct rip off of some other band. At times some songs sound a bit Ryan Adams-y then on tracks like "Old Ways," Vasquez’ vocal melody is reminiscent of The Beatles but if you dig just well written rock ‘n’ roll, this Texas boy’s music is for you. Free with RSVP, 9:30pm, The Rustic, 17619 La Cantera Pkwy Suite 204, (210) 245-7500, therustic.com. – Chris Conde FRI

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Fans of the OG, British art/prog-rock crew Moody Blues have a special treat in store for them this weekend.

For the first time ever, the group (a 2018 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee) is touring its classic, dare I say groundbreaking 1967 album Days of Future Passed, a gem from beginning to end that features the hits “Nights in White Satin” and “Tuesday Afternoon.”

With its groundbreaking melding of classical, pop, and rock styles, this album is not only the quintessential Moody Blues effort, its deserving of mention alongside other great 1960s albums that pushed the boundaries of what rock/pop music could be. Aside from playing all of Future Passed, the band will also offer up a set of choice cuts from throughout its five decade-plus odyssey. $56-$151, 8pm, The Majestic, 224 E. Houston St. (210) 2263333, majesticempire.com. – JC

AT T

MOODY BLUES

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BOOTS, BOOGIE, AND HONKY-TONK WITH DALE WATSON AND DT BUFFKIN

FRI

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Here’s the lowdown on the beer-drinkin-est, shitkickin-est, boot-scootin-est, rowdy good time you’re likely to scare up anywhere in town this Friday. The show is called Boots, Boogie, and Honky-Tonk for a reason. There ain’t hardly another man in Texas who’s as honky-tonk as headliner Dale Watson. The Austin-based outsider-country stalwart won’t play you no damn pop country and he won’t ever make you ask about whether or not ol’ Hank done it this way. Meanwhile, the show will also feature performances from locals The Three Timers and DT Buffkin, both of which bring some serious honkytonk themselves. If that sounds like so much fun it ought to be illegal—don’t worry, it’s for a good cause. All proceeds will benefit young people living in San Antonio Housing Authority’s Public Housing and Section 8 programs. $20-$25, 8pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersatx.com. – James Courtney FRI

MARC DANIEL

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DRU HILL

Daaaaaaaaaaamn. Talk about a blast from the past. Now, if you’re old enough to remember the phenomenon that was the ’90s R&B group Dru Hill, and their frontman Sisqo, then you know this show is about to be ridiculous. And not in a bad way. Sure, while it may have been almost 20 years since Sisqo’s “The Thong Song” came out (now we feel old), us San Antonians have proven time and again that we have no problem re-living music from that past (see last year’s Metallica and Guns N’ Roses concerts). For a chance to bust out those baggy jeans and Tommy Hilfiger, you won’t want to miss this one. $42.50-$62.50, 8pm, Lila Cockrell Theater, 200 E Market St., (210) 207-8500, sahbgcc.com/facilities/lila-cockrell-theatre. – CC FRI

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BUTTERCUP CLASSICAL MYSTERY TOUR When Buttercup has a show anywhere, let alone at the impeccable Carlos Alvarez Studio Theater, you’re on permanent notice to get your ass there. The veteran SA art-rock crew, a terrific trio comprised of Erik Sanden, Joe Reyes, and Odie, has crafted its very identity over the last 15 years though its irreverent, theatrical, warm, and deeply engaging live shows. In fact, at this special show, Buttercup will debut a music video for “Acting Through Music,” a song of the group’s most recent album that addresses the band’s use of music and stagecraft as therapy, as art, and as communication. Like all Buttercup shows, loose and casual in the most disarming and inviting ways, attendees are in for something unique and inspiring – and probably a wacky surprise or two. The uninitiated can dig Buttercup’s catalog over at buttercult.bandcamp.com, but you’ve got to get the live experience to truly appreciate the warm humor and unadulterated joy of this local treasure. $20, 8pm, Carlos Alvarez Studio Theater at Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, tobincenter.org. – JC SAT

MARK GREENBERG

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ANNABELLE CHAIRLEGS, THE DULL DRUMS, MOCKINGBIRD EXPRESS If I had a dollar for everytime I checked out a band coming to San Antonio that turned out to be some basic ass psych rock from LA or Austin or Brooklyn, I could buy groceries for a month. The thing is, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with the general umbrella of psychedelic music. It’s amazing stuff, and if I told you I didn’t trip on mushrooms while listening to psych rock, I’d be lying ‘cause we’ve all been curious to see what’s on the darkside of the moon. While you could most definitely find an Annabelle Chairlegs record underneath “psychedelic rock” in any record store, there’s an honesty about their sound that makes me believe they’re not in it because psyche rock is cool (it’s actually less en vogue now), but what I hear when I hear this band is a genuine sound, and it’s radical. $7, 9pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersatx.com. – CC SAT

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Marilyn Manson doesn’t really need any introduction. Since the early '90s, the rock ‘n’ roller has been shocking America with his flagrant stage antics and catalog of music that has spanned a variety of genres including spooky circus-sounding rock (Portrait of an American Family), Family industrial (Antichrist Superstar), Superstar glam-rock (Mechanical Animals), bluesy-roots rock (Pale Emperor), and sometimes a ( combination of it all. Next week the “Dope Show” singer will return to San Antonio in support of his latest album Heaven Upside Down, Down which, in contrast to 2015’s The Pale Emperor, Emperor leans a little more towards electronic drum sounds and production.

Arguably one of the most controversial artists of all time, Manson’s modus operandi has always been to reflect the dark underbelly of America, and with the state of our nation, it’s safe to say that the Antichrist Superstar’s work is far from over. $59-$175, 8pm, Aztec Theatre, 104 N. St. Mary’s St, (210) 8124355, theaztectheatre.com. – CC

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CROWN THE EMPIRE + LIKE GHOSTS Spacey swells of reverberating guitars match vocal pop melodies as heavy drums hits break up the movement into shimmery chunks of rock ‘n’ roll.

Crown The Empire do post-hardcore as good as their predecessors like Underoath more recently We Came as Romans. And while these dudes aren’t exactly doing anything new with the genre they are doing a damn good job within it. Hailing from Dallas, Crown The Empire are that poppy rock n roll fix you love to hate to secretly love and you’ll most likely be at the show. Also on the bill are San Antonio’s Like Ghosts, who, since last year, have continued to build a following within the scene. $16-$18, 6pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersatx.com. – CC TUE

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MUSIC

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John Magaldi An evening of jazz with John Magaldi and the Primetime jazz group.

Free. The Cove, 8-10pm.

THURSDAY, JANUARY 18 Bill Small Band Americana group the Bill Small Band performs live. Free. Gruene Hall, 6-10pm.

Cpt. Kirk Covington Quintet Upbeat jazz group performs live. $5. Luna, 8 pm.

A Formula For The Future & The Foreign Arm Present: A unique pairing of spoken word, discussion and music, poet/activist/ singer Andrea “Vocab” Sanderson (The Foreign Arm) will co-host this event that is part narrative, part concert, and part open dialogue. $10. Carmens de la Calle Café, 8pm.

Jose Amador and Natiao Latin Jazz Latin Jazz bands perform live. $10. Jazz, TX, 8:30-11:30pm.

Michael Alanis Local singer/songwriter performs originals. Free. The Rustic, 8:3010pm.

44

CURRENT • January 17-23, 2018 • sacurrent.com

Sam Riggs Austin country-rock singer Sam Riggs performs live. $12-$15. John T. Floore’s Country Store, 9pm.

Tyler Kinchen & The Right Pieces Energetic R&B band from New Orleans perform live. $10. Luna, 8pm.

TheGetDown Southtown 101’s free Friday night party The GetDown features beats

by DJ Tech-Neek, drink specials and food available from the grill until 2:30am.

Southtown 101, 10pm.

Wood Stove Sessions Americana singer/ songwriter band Bob Livingston trio peform live. Free. Luckenbach Dance Hall, 7pm.

New Orleans Night New Orleans Night with Doc Watkins, Pierre Poree and friends. $20. Jazz, TX, 8:30-11:30pm.

Red Not Chili Peppers Red Not Chili Peppers, a tribute to RHCP, perform with The Undercovers. $10-$45. Sam’s Burger Joint, 7pm.

The Eastwood Project: A Blues Continuum The Renaissance Guild artners with The Carver Community Cultural Center to present the premiere of their original music revue “The Eastwood Project: A Blues Continuum.”

The performance featuring music and dance aims to recall the memories of the Eastwood Country Club written by Evonne Nathaniel and directed by Danielle King. $17-$34. Little Carver Civic Center, 8pm.

Bobby Mack Blues Artist Bobby Mack takes the stage with Joey McGee. Free. Gruene Hall, 7-11pm.

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Matthew Logan Vasquez Indie folk artist performs his new full-length original album.

Free with RSVP. Free. The Rustic, 9:3011pm.

Third Thursday Jazz Frank hosts a jazz night with the Noah Peterson Quartet. Free.

Frank, 10pm.

Alma Flamenco Flamenco featuring Steven Arispe, Sonya Casillas and Alma Flamenco.

Free. Carmens de la Calle Café, 8:3010:45pm.

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Friday Afternoon Picker Circle Country singer Hayden Whittington performs an unplugged acoustic set. Free. Luckenbach Dance Hall, 1pm.

Back to the '90s: Round One Brass Monkey and Jack FM Live are throwing a '90s dance party with '90s attire encouraged. Free.

Brass Monkey, 9pm-2am.

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Michael Martin and The Infidels Folk band Michael Martin & The Infidels perform at The Cove. Free. The Cove, 9-11pm.

Pam and Gary Acoustic Artists cover multiple styles of music from country to pop. Free. The Cove, 8:30-10:30pm.

Track N Feels Thursday Indie-pop DJ Idyll Green plays a variety of music, featuring a light show, live remixing and drink specials.

Free. The Bang Bang Bar, 10pm.

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Final Drive Missouri metal outfit Final Drive perform with Shattered Sun and Resist Control. $8-$10. Bond’s 007 Rock Bar, 7 pm-midnight.

SATURDAY, JANUARY 20 Wall of Soul Alternative rock band Wall of Soul is joined by Scarlet Canary of Denver.

Free. The Bang Bang Bar, 9pm-2am.

Boots, Boogie, & Honky Tonk Honky-tonk legend and Texas favorite Dale Watson headline with local honky-tonk band DT Buffkin. $20-$25. Paper Tiger, 8pm.

11th Annual Blues Festival Blues Featuring The Peterson Brothers, Miss Lavelle White and The L Man, Crooked River Mile, Whitey Johnson, Ben Beckendorf, Hubby Jenkins, Zach Day and Jeff Plankenhorn. $30.

Luckenbach Dance Hall, Noon-9pm.

Brian Christopher & The Wild Oats Texas country rockers Brian Christopher & The Wild Oats are joined by The Big Gun Show. Free. The Phoenix Saloon, 9pm.

Annabelle Chairlegs Psych-rock band Annabelle Chairlegs joins The Dull Drums and Mockingbird Express at Paper Tiger. $7. Paper Tiger, 8pm.

Brockhampton Los Angeles hip-hop band Brockhampton hit up The Aztec on their Love Your Parents tour. $35-$57. Aztec Theatre, 8pm.

Tyler Kinchen & The Right Pieces Energetic R&B band from New Orleans perform live. $10. Luna, 8pm.

Chris Duarte Group Blues musicians Chris Duarte Group perform with Elijah Zane. $10-$45. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm.

Dead Love Club New Wave band Dead Love Club play live. Free. The Amp Room, 8-11pm.

Doc Watkins and His Orchestra Doc Watkins and his jazz orchestra performs live. $25. Jazz, TX, 8:30-11:30pm.

Anonymous Henchmen Metal band Anonymous Henchmen is joined by Dreamlight, What I Despise, Circadia and Bluntsplitter for Ammo For My Arsenals CD release. $5-$8. Bond’s 007 Rock Bar, 7-10pm.

Bo Phillips Band Texas red dirt performers the Bo Phillips Band perform an afternoon set at Gruene Hall. Free. Gruene Hall, 1-5 pm.

Sonny Wolf Blues rock artist Sonny Wolf

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performs live. Free. The Phoenix Saloon, 9pm.

Cove, 9-11pm.

Bru’s Tunes Live Acoustic music by Bru’s Tunes. Free. Evil Olive Elixir Lounge, 9:30pm-12:30am.

The Texases Local dudes play classic country hits from Waylon to Willie, Garth to Clint, and George to George. Free. The Rustic, 9:30-11pm.

Buttercup Beloved SA indie rockers Buttercup perform at the Tobin. $20. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 8pm.

Wall of Soul Alternative rock band Wall of Soul is joined by Scarlet Canary of Denver.

Free. The Bang Bang Bar, 9pm-2am.

Cameron Elise, Alex and the Space Cadets An evening of gypsy rock and psychedelic tunes. Free. Imagine Books and Records, 8-11:40pm.

SUNDAY, JANUARY 21

A Classic Winter Rock Fest Presented by OV Productions, A Classic Winter Rock Fest features sets from the Pat Travers Band, Starz and special guest, Axe. $28-$38.

Alamo City Music Hall & Club, 6pm-1am.

Dalton Domino & Deryl Dodd Country artist Dalton Domino is joined by Deryl Dodd of Waco, Texas. $12. Gruene Hall, 9pm.

Dan Rocha Jr. Dallas based singer-songwriter Daniel Rocha plays live tunes. Free. The Rustic, 12:30 & 4pm.

Down for the Count Americana band Down for the Count of South Texas perform everything from sing-along tracks to obscure B-side songs. Free. The Cove, 6:30-8:30pm.

Dreamweek 2018: Mayor’s Ball Inaugural DreamWeek The finale event of the 2018 Summit is a celebration highlighting San Antonio’s burgeoning arts and culture scene, featuring some of the city’s foremost musical, theatrical, comedic, and cultural performance artists. $30. The Majestic Theatre, 7pm.

The Eastwood Project: A Blues Continuum The Renaissance Guild artners with The Carver Community Cultural Center to present the premiere of their original music revue “The Eastwood Project: A Blues Continuum.”

The performance featuring music and dance aims to recall the memories of the Eastwood Country Club written by Evonne Nathaniel and directed by Danielle King. $17-$34. Little Carver Civic Center, 4pm.

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The Hot Nut Riveters Texas original recession era strong band The Hot Nut Riveters performs at Sam’s Burger Joint. $12-$50. Sam’s Burger Joint, 5pm.

The King and Avatar Metal band is joined

by The Brains, Hellzapoppin and The King. $19. Aztec Theatre, 6:30pm.

Mark’s Brothers Live band perform a range from originals to swing, country, folk and blues from the 1920’s through the 1970’s to form their own blend of American music.

Free. The Cove, 4-6pm.

Miss Neesie and Earfood Orchestra Live band perform an afternoon of soulful tunes.

Free. The Cove, 1-3pm.

Mitchell Ferguson Dallas performer plays an afternoon of original songs. Free. The Eclipse A tribute band to Journey is joined by Rustic, 12:30-2pm.

Mothership, a Led Zeppelin tribute. $12.50.

Aztec Theatre, Sat., Jan. 20, 7pm.

South Austin Moonlighters Folk-rockers perform an afternoon set at Gruene Hall.

The Eastwood Project: A Blues Free. Gruene Hall, 4-8pm.

Continuum The Renaissance Guild artners with The Carver Community Sunday Evening Picker Circle Unplugged Cultural Center to present the premiere Acoustic jam featuring country singers Kathy of their original music revue “The Bauer & Michael Broussard of Bandera.

Eastwood Project: A Blues Continuum.”

Free. Luckenbach Dance Hall, 5pm.

The performance featuring music and MONDAY, JANUARY 22 dance aims to recall the memories of the Eastwood Country Club written by Evonne Bret Graham Country artist Bret Graham Nathaniel and directed by Danielle King. performs live. Free. Gruene Hall, 6-10pm. $17-$34. Little Carver Civic Center, 8pm Dan West Dan West performs an unplugged Josh Weathers acoustic show Soulful country jam under the oaks. Free. singer songwriter Josh Weathers of Fort Luckenbach Dance Hall, 5pm.

Worth is joined by Pauline Wick. $12$70. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm.

Hush Machine Garage rockers Hush Machine is joined by Noise Quota, Judas And The Beast Judas Austin rockers Phantom and Luke Mitchell at Imagine perform with Mob Rules and Seance for an Books. $5. Imagine Books and Records, evening of Judas Priest, Iron Maiden and 8-11:59pm.

Dio covers. $10-$15. Fitzgerald’s Bar & Live Music, 8pm.-2am.

Swing Nite with Huck Johnson and the Jackknives Swing Night with Huck Melaza Angel Santos fires up his nine-piece Johnson and The Jackknives. Dance lessons Latin band Melaza. $20. Carmens de la from 7-8. Band kicks off at 8:30. $7-$10.

Calle Café, 8-11pm.

Sam’s Burger Joint, 7pm.

New Orleans Night New Orleans Night with TUESDAY, JANUARY 23 Doc Watkins, Pierre Poree and friends. $20. Jazz, TX, 8:30-11:30pm.

Crown The Empire Post-hardcore outfit Crown The Empire performs at Paper Tiger.

Pinback Nineties indie-rockers perform live. $16-$18. Paper Tiger, 6:30pm. $17. Paper Tiger, 8pm.

George Ensle Singer/songwriter George Doc Watkins and His Orchestra Doc Ensle is joined by Butch Morgan and David Watkins and his jazz orchestra performs Roth. Free. Gruene Hall, 6-10pm. live. $25. Jazz, TX, 8:30-11:30pm.

Neck Deep Pop-punk band Neck Deep is Texas T and The Shine Runners Texas joined by Speak Low if you Speak Love for Rockabilly band Texas T and The Shine The Peace and The Panic tour. $22-$25.

Runners perform at The Cove. Free. The Alamo City Music Hall & Club, 6pm.

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 45

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I’m a professional dominatrix, and I thought I’d seen everything in the last five years. But this situation completely baffled the entire dungeon. This middleaged guy, seemingly in fine health, booked an appointment with me and my colleague for one hour of some very light play and a golden shower to finish off with. We did no CBT, no cock rings, no trauma to the dick area at all, no ass play, no sounding or catheters, no turbulent masturbation, nothing that could have caused this reaction. We brought him into the bathroom, and he laid down on his back, jerking off with a condom on his penis as my buddy was standing over him and peeing and I was saying all kinds of mean/encouraging sentiments and closely observing his progress. He came and … it was entirely blood. It looked like he shat into his condom, through his penis. He did not seem alarmed or in pain. He took off his condom himself, so he was aware of the situation. He did not remark on it to either of us! He made ZERO effort to prepare either of us, either. And it was not a little blood in his ejaculate — it was entirely blood. He has never returned. Is this person a monster or a vampire? Is he dying? Seriously.

Mistress Echo P.S. I went back to the bathroom with gloves on and removed the used condom from the trash and took a photo. It’s the only way to communicate just how much blood there was.

“You can tell Mistress Echo that her client was not a monster or a vampire, and he is likely not dying anytime soon,” said Dr. Stephen H. King, a boardcertified urologist. “What she observed is a person with hematospermia, meaning blood in the semen.”

While the sight is alarming — I’ll never be able to scrape that photo off the back of my eyeballs, thanks — Dr. King assures me that it’s nothing to worry about, as hematospermia is almost always benign.

And even if you had done ball play or rough CBT (cock and ball torture), or if he engaged in solo CBT prior to the session, it’s unlikely that kind of play would result in a condom full of blood.

“The vast majority of the semen actually comes from the prostate and

the seminal vesicles, which are located deep in the pelvis just behind and below the bladder, respectively,” said Dr. King.

“Very little of the ejaculate fluid actually originates from the testicles,” which primarily pump out hormones and sperm cells. “The prostate gland and seminal vesicles (also glands) store up the fluids and can become overdistended with long periods of abstinence and prone toward micro tearing and bleeding in this circumstance.”

Blowing regular loads doesn’t just lower your risk for prostate cancer, as multiple studies have shown, it also lowers your risk for filling condoms with blood and alarming your friendly neighborhood pro-Dom. Two good reasons for draining those balls, guys — and other people with balls because, as the Book of Tumblr teaches us, not all guys have balls and not all balls have guys.

“Also, these glands are lined by smooth muscle that contracts to force out the fluid [during ejaculation],” Dr. King continued. “If the force of contraction is excessive — a fucking great orgasm — this may lead toward rupture of some of the surrounding blood vessels and blood will enter the semen.”

Your client’s blasé reaction is a good indication that he’s experienced this previously, ME, because most guys who see blood in their semen — or only blood when they expected to see semen — freak the fuck out.

“In my practice, most guys who see blood in their ejaculate the first time are sufficiently freaked out to seek immediate medical attention, and their doctors usually tell them this isn’t something to worry about — unless it persists,” said Dr. King. “In cases where the hematospermia persists, gets worse, or is associated with other symptoms such as pain, difficulty urinating, or general health decline, medical attention is definitely recommended.”

Back to your client, ME: If blood loads have happened to him before (hence the blasé reaction), proper etiquette dictates that he should have said something to you about it afterward (“I’m fine, no biggie”).

If it happens to him regularly, he should have warned you in advance — at least that’s what it says in my imaginary edition of Emily Post’s Etiquette. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter ITMFA.org

ETC.

JONESIN’ CROSSWORD by Matt Jones

Answer on page 21

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ACROSS

1 Mature insect stage 6 528i maker 9 Arrears 14 Once less than once 15 Noise at the dentist 16 Andrews of “Mary Poppins” 17 Port-au-Prince or FortLibertÈ, as an example of what to call cities?

19 “___ we all?”

20 City SE of Oklahoma City 21 Just the right amount of stellar?

23 Haves and have-___ 25 They may be removed in “premium” versions 26 Some smartphones 27 Uncool sort 29 Uncle, in Oaxaca 30 Software problem 33 Jazz combo instrument 37 Facebook action 38 Oscar news about “Reds” or “Bulworth” (or “Network”)?

42 Shirt sleeves 43 Journalist Cokie who appears on ABC and NPR 44 Afternoon break 45 Part of FWIW 46 Congo basin animal 50 Solar system center

51 Surprised sounds 54 Madeline of “Blazing Saddles” 55 Much, much smaller?

60 Fish eggs 61 “That’s ___ shame” 62 Go out with Carrie Ann of “Dancing With the Stars?”

64 Blue-gray shade 65 Back in time 66 Ambulance attendant 67 Scammed 68 Actor Jeong 69 Hard worker’s output

DOWN

1 Under one’s control 2 Grassland 3 Do some fl ying 4 Figure out 5 First of its kind (abbr.)

6 Made some barnyard noises 7 Half of a 1960s pop quartet 8 Put a sharper edge on 9 “___ Unchained” (Tarantino movie) 10 Continent-wide money 11 Chicken Cordon ___ 12 Triangle sound 13 Late-night host Meyers 18 Program begun under FDR 22 Alchemist’s potion

24 Stadium capacity 28 Crispy sandwich 29 Mild 30 Drill piece 31 Island strings, for short 32 Diploma equivalent 34 Power in old movies 35 ___ about (roughly) 36 Show sorrow 37 Eye surgery acronym 38 Outlaw 39 Notable period 40 Current measure 41 Utmost degree 45 Put gas in 47 Holiday procession 48 Intense fear 49 Short play length 50 What a two-letter abbreviation may denote 51 “August: ___ County” (2013 Streep film) 52 Show interest in, in a way 53 Figure out 55 Laundry 56 “Alice’s Restaurant” chronicler Guthrie 57 Affirmative votes 58 Bismarck’s home (abbr.)

59 Wheel accessories 63 Word after “brand spanking”

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ETC.

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (March 21-April 19): Many American women did not have the right to vote until August 18, 1920. On that day, the Tennessee General Assembly became the 36th state legislature to approve the Nineteenth Amendment, thus sealing the legal requirements to change the U.S. Constitution and ensure women’s suffrage.

The ballot in Tennessee was close. At the last minute, 24-year-old legislator Harry T. Burns changed his mind from no to yes, thanks to a letter from his mother, who asked him to “be a good boy” and vote in favor. I suspect that in the coming weeks, Aries, you will be in a pivotal position not unlike Burns’. Your decision could affect more people than you know. Be a good boy or good girl.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the coming weeks, Destiny will be calling you and calling you and calling you, inviting you to answer its summons. If you do indeed answer, it will provide you with clear instructions about what you will need to do expedite your ass in the direction of the future. If on the other hand you refuse to listen to Destiny’s call, or hear it and refuse to respond, then Destiny will take a different tack. It won’t provide any instructions, but will simply yank your ass in the direction of the future.

Leo, you have kept your suffering to a minimum as you have smartly done your hard work. In some cases you have even thrived.

Congratulations on being so industrious and steadfast! Beginning soon, you will glide into a smoother stage of your cycle. Be alert for the inviting signs. Don’t assume you’ve got to keep grunting and grinding.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Norwegian artist Edvard Munch (1863-1944) created four versions of his iconic artwork The Scream.

Each depicts a person who seems terribly upset, holding his head in his hands and opening his mouth wide as if unleashing a loud shriek. In 2012, one of these images of despair was sold for almost $120 million. The money went to the son of a man who had been Munch’s friend and patron. Can you think of a way that you and yours might also be able to extract value or get benefits from a negative emotion or a difficult experience? The coming weeks will be a favorable time to do just that.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “I think I like my brain best in a bar fight with my heart,” says poet Clementine von Radics. While I appreciate that perspective, I advise you to do the opposite in the coming weeks. This will be a phase of your astrological cycle when you should definitely support your heart over your brain in bar fights, wrestling matches, shadow boxing contests, tugs of war, battles of wits, and messy arguments.

Here’s one of the most important reasons why I say this: Your brain would be inclined to keep the conflict going until one party or the other suffers ignominious defeat, whereas your heart is much more likely to work toward a win-win conclusion.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Looks like the Season of a Thousand and One Emotions hasn’t drained and frazzled you. Yes, there may be a pool of tears next to your bed. Your altar might be filled with heaps of ashes, marking your burnt offerings. But you have somehow managed to extract a host of useful lessons from your tests and trials. You have surprised yourself with the resilience and resourcefulness you’ve been able to summon. And so the energy you’ve gained through these gritty triumphs is SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): When he was 24 well worth the price you’ve had to pay. years old, Scorpio-born Zhu Yuanzhang (13281398) was a novice monk with little money CANCER (June 21-July 22): Every who had just learned to read and write. He relationship is unique. The way you had spent years as a wandering beggar. By the connect with another person — whether time he was 40 years old, he was the emperor it’s through friendship, romance, family, or of China and founder of the Ming Dynasty, collaborative projects — should be free to which ruled for 276 years. What happened find the distinctive identity that best suits its in between? That’s a long story. Zhu’s special chemistry. Therefore, it’s a mistake adventurousness was a key asset, and so was to compare any of your alliances to some his ability as an audacious and crafty tactician. supposedly perfect ideal. Luckily, you’re in His masterful devotion to detailed practical an astrological period when you have extra matters was also indispensable. If you are savvy about cultivating unique models of ever in your life going to begin an ascent even togetherness. So I recommend that you remotely comparable to Zhu’s, Scorpio, it will devote the coming weeks to deepening and be in the coming ten months. Being brave and refining your most important bonds. enterprising won’t be enough. You must be disciplined and dogged, as well.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): During recent weeks, your main tasks have centered around themes SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): In 1892, the often associated with strain and struggle: influential Atlantic Monthly magazine criticized repair, workaround, reassessment, jurySagittarian poet Emily Dickinson, saying she rigging, adjustment, compromise. Amazingly, “possessed an extremely unconventional and

grotesque fancy.” It dismissed her poetry as incoherent, and declared that an “eccentric, dreamy, half-educated recluse” like her “cannot with impunity set at defiance the laws of gravitation and grammar.” This dire diss turned out to be laughably wrong. Dickinson is now regarded as one of the most original American poets. I offer this story up as a pep talk for you, Sagittarius. In the coming months, I suspect you’ll be reinventing yourself. You’ll be researching new approaches to living your life. In the course of these experiments, others may see you as being in the grip of unconventional or grotesque fantasy. They may consider you dreamy and eccentric. I hope you won’t allow their misunderstandings to interfere with your playful yet serious work.

the future evolution of the project. So try to make sure those are conditions you like!

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “When one door closes, another opens,” said inventor Alexander Graham Bell. “But we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened.” Heed his advice, Aquarius. Take the time you need to mourn the lost opportunity.

But don’t take MORE than the time you need.

The replacement or alternative to what’s gone will show up sooner than you think.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Gilbert Stuart painted the most famous portrait of America’s first president, George Washington.

It’s the image on the U.S. one-dollar bill. And CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Bubble gum yet Stuart never finished the masterpiece. is more elastic and less sticky than regular Begun in 1796, it was still a work-in-progress chewing gum. That’s why you can blow bubbles when Stuart died in 1828. Leonardo da with it. A Capricorn accountant named Walter Vinci had a similar type of success. His Diemer invented it in 1928 while working for incomplete painting The Virgin and Child with the Fleer Chewing Gum Company. At the time St. Anne hangs in the Louvre in Paris, and he finally perfected the recipe, the only food his unfinished The Adoration of the Magi has dye he had on hand was pink. His early batches been in Florence’s Uffizi Gallery since 1671. were all that color, and a tradition was born.

I propose that Stuart and da Vinci serve as That’s why even today, most bubble gum is your role models in the coming weeks. Maybe pink. I suspect a similar theme may unfold it’s not merely OK if a certain project of yours soon in your life. The conditions present at the remains unfinished; maybe that’s actually the beginning of a new project may deeply imprint preferred outcome.

THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow

sacurrent.com • January 17-23, 2018 • CURRENT 49

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