San Antonio Current - April 26, 2017

12

41

31

2

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

San Antonio Event Center

8111 Meadow Leaf Dr, SA, TX 78227

April 28th - April 30th FRI. 12-8 | SAT. 12-8 | SUN. 12-5:30

$10 daily admission $15 dollar weekend pass 5000+ attendance Celebrity Guest Appearances Keynote speakers $3 dollar parking

MUSIC & ENTERTAINMENT • CLOUD COMP • TRICK COMP • FULLY STOCKED BAR • FOOD • CASH PRIZES

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 3

HAVE FUN & LET US DRIVE YOU SAFELY TO YOUR NEXT PARTY!

#1 LOCAL CHARTERS PARTY BU COMPANY!

PERMANENT COSMETICS

BY JEANETTE MCCRIGHT DAAM-SPCP

APRIL SPECIAL EYEBROW SPECIAL 50% OFF MUST MENTION THIS AD (EXPIRES 04/30/2017)

@satransportationcomp FOLLOW & LIKE US!

SPECIALIZING IN: EYEBROWS • EYELINER BLUSH • HIGHLIGHTER LIPS • LIP LINER TINT/PERM LASHES

210-826-8836

8503 BROADWAY, SUITE 114 @ LOOP 410 PERMANENTCOSMETICSBYJEANETTEMCCRIGHT.COM RECOMMENDED BY PHYSICIANS FOR 25 YEARS!

WHAT IS CANNABIDIOL (CBD)?

CBD is the major nonpsychotropic cannabinoid derived from industrial hemp.

Numerous studies have shown it to have many holistic benefits.

WHAT ARE THE POSSIBLE BENEFITS OF CBD?

Publisher: Michael Wagner Editor in Chief: Michael Barajas Associate Publisher: Lara Fischer

Editorial

Senior Editors: Bryan Rindfuss, Jessica Elizarraras Art Director: Sarah Flood-Baumann Food & Nightlife Editor: Jessica Elizarraras Staff Writer: Alex Zielinski, Chris Conde Digital Content Editor: Alejandra Lopez Contributors: Alexis Barnhart, Ron Bechtol, Karah Carmack, Erik Casarez, James Courtney, Callie Enlow, Jade Esteban Estrada, Dan R. Goddard, Lance Higdon, Steve Jansen, Steven G. Kellman, Michelle C. Lorentzen, Abby Mangel, Kiko Martínez, Jeremy Martin, Jeff Meyers, Eric Moreno, Ben Olivo, M. Solis, Mark Stenberg, Gary Sweeney, Shannon Sweet, J.D. Swerzenski, Erin Winch Editorial Interns: Kimberly Rivera

Advertising

FOR SALE | 403 CULEBRA Hard corner of Culebra & Colorado

Sales Manager: Chelsea Bourque Account Manager: Ashley McLean Senior Multimedia Account Executive: Carlos Aguirre Jr., Teena Connell Multimedia Account Executives: Sarah Estrada, Jenavie Aguilar, Gerry Martinez, Danielle Reyna

Marketing and Events

Marketing and Events Director: Cassandra Yardeni Marketing Intern: Erick De Luna, Brianna Mendez

Creative Services

•Anti-inflammatory •Pain relief •Antioxidant •Sleep aid •Antibacterial •Anxiety relief Visit us today to find out more about our pharmaceutical grade line of CBD edibles and oils.

2166 Jackson Keller Rd, 78213 | 531 San Pedro Ave., 78212

San Antonio Current

Creative Services Manager: John Mata Graphic Designer: Tina Corbeil Creative Service Interns: Joseph Drake, Rosario Corona, Jade Cuevas

CONTACT GABRIEL GARCIA 210-374-8400

Business

Operations Manager: Sarah Estrada Business Support Specialist: Samantha Lopez

Circulation

TURN YOUR GAME

Circulation Manager: Richard Garcia

Euclid Media Group

Chief Executive Officer: Andrew Zelman Chief Operating Officers: Chris Keating, Michael Wagner Human Resources Director: Lisa Beilstein Digital Operations Coordinator: Jaime Monzon Senior Marketing and Events Director: Cassandra Yardeni www.euclidmediagroup.com

HARDWARE INTO STACKS OF CASH!

National Advertising: Voice Media Group 1-888-278-9866, voicemediagroup.com San Antonio Current 915 Dallas San Antonio, Texas 78215 sacurrent.com Editorial - (210) 227-0044 / Fax - (210) 227-7755 Display Advertising - (210) 227-0044 Fax - (210) 227-7733 Classified - (210) 227-CLAS / Fax - (210) 227-7733 The San Antonio Current is published by Euclid Media Group Verified Audit Member San Antonio Distribution – The Current is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader.

We pay cash for your CDs, DVDs, Games & Game Hardware!

9861 IH-10 West • 641-1600 3703 Broadway • 828-5525 6997 Bandera Rd. • 509-3472

4

803 SW Military • 928-3472 8235 Agora Pkwy • 566-9200 5253 Walzem • 650-3472

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

13486 US 281 • 545-3472 5442 Evers • 680-3472 6900 San Pedro • 826-2662

SAN ANTONIO’S #1 STOP FOR CORSETS AND WAIST TRAINERS SPECIALIZING IN ANN CHERY WAIST TRAINERS

LOCATED

UptownGypsy.com • (210) 530-1859 4522 Fredericksburg Rd. #B64

Get listed 1. Visit sacurrent.com 2. Click “Calendar” and then “Submit an Event” 3. Follow the steps to submit your event details Please allow 48 hours for review and approval.

Event submissions are not accepted by phone.

Copyright - The entire contents of the San Antonio Current are copyright 2015 by Euclid Media Group LLC. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission of the publisher is prohibited. Publisher does not assume any liability for unsolicited manuscripts, materials, or other content. Any submission must include a stamped, self-addressed envelope. All editorial, advertising, and business correspondence should be mailed to the address listed above.

Subscriptions - Additional copies or back issues may be purchased at the Current offices for $1. Six-month domestic subscriptions may be purchased for $75; one-year subscriptions for $125.

GET MORE Transfer your credits to OLLU

¡ Transfer scholarships of up to $15,000 per year ¡ PHI THETA KAPPA members may qualify for an additional $3,000 scholarship ¡ Maximum transfer of credits through agreement plans with all Alamo Colleges ¡ Nationwide internship and career services network ¡ Dedicated transfer counselors who assist with - Degree evaluation - Financial aid and scholarships - Application completion - Registration 411 S.W. 24th Street ¡ San Antonio, TX 78207 ¡ www.ollusa.edu/admissions 210-431-3961 ¡ admissions@ollusa.edu sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 5

FIRST WORDS

1

• Send your thoughts, comments, kudos or tips to letters@sacurrent.com

Mayor Taylor Says Poverty Is a Symptom of Atheism: “yes! how dare she hide her ineptitude behind GOD!!!! Dear, Mayor, I am a christian and I am not ashamed of it... But I strongly agree with separation of church and state!!!!! which was created to keep impostors like you out of our legislation.” — Bernardo Rodriguez Vergara UT Bulletproof Vests Featured in Satirical Video: “The idiocy is having guns on campus at all. They should be restricted to the home, shooting ranges and while hunting. They should have no place in public venues..” — Cheryl Cox Brinkman San Antonio Man Finds Cheeto that Looks Like the Virgin Mary: “Step one: buy a bag of cheetos Step two: find a Cheeto that almost resembles the Virgin Mary or Jesus and shape it up to look very similar to them

IN THIS

23

ISSUE Issue 17_17 /// April 26-May 2, 2017

08

NEWS

“Not Ted Cruz” San Antonio greets Congressman Beto O’Rourke Profit Prisons Private contractor with a shady history gets another immigrant detention center in Texas

12

FEATURE

Make San Antonio Great Again?

An ethically challenged city, a near-billion dollar bond, a very strange mayor’s race

20

CALENDAR

Our top picks for the week

Last Captive SeaWorld’s last orca is born in San Antonio

12

Step three: profit Step four: repeat all steps until you become rich.”

— Alvaro Torres The Best Bars and Nightlife Spots in San Antonio, According to Our Readers: “I did not know the Wax was a lesbian club ? This explains why none of the women there will will let me buy them drinks . I always thought the women were kind of manly there, now that I think about it. But man I love the music there. Oh well.” — Henry Ramirez

31

ARTS + CULTURE

Fiesta Primer Here’s your guide to all things Fiesta Cultura as Commodity Columnista Bárbara Renaud González highlights the consumption of our culture

37

SCREENS

Monster Mash Colossal mixes genres and narratives with near-perfect results

This week, we take an in-depth look at San Antonio’s particularly messy and controversial mayoral election. With Manuel Medina’s “drain the swamp!” mentality, incumbent Ivy Taylor’s ethical tangles and Ron Nirenberg’s ever-evolving politics — it’s quickly become an unusual race. We try to answer that question on everyone’s mind: How exactly did we get here?

Illustration by Jeremiah Teutsch Art direction by Sarah Flood-Baumann 6

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

43

NIGHTLIFE

In Alcohol News…

TABC head steps down, Ranger Creek accolades and more

FOOD

Dinner & A Show At Frank, The Magicians Agency suspends reality while providing joy Food Court Taco Throwdown returns, Hot Joy heads north, and the Folc burger is back

ON THE

COVER

39

45

MUSIC

Siesta Fiesta Local favorites The Union Underground reunite for a numetal-filled Fiesta-week bash Music Calendar What to see and hear this week

52

ETC.

Savage Love Jonesin’ Crossword Freewill Astrology

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 7

WIKIPEDIA

NEWS

ALEX ZIELINSKI | @ALEX_ZEE

‘NOT TED CRUZ’ San Antonio greets Congressman Beto O’Rourke

•

Beto O’Rourke

≥

“He’s 44, from El Paso, and looks like a Kennedy.”

This is everything Roseanne Penningroth knew about U.S. Congressman Beto O’Rourke before hearing him speak last Thursday evening.

There was really just one reason she decided to attend O’Rourke’s San Antonio stop on a whirlwind campaign tour across Texas: “He’s not Ted Cruz.”

It was one of the main reasons some 200 people gathered outside Southerleigh Brewery to listen to O’Rourke, the El Paso Democrat hoping to unseat Sen. Ted Cruz in 2018.

He quickly proved them right, kicking off the event by comparing his run for U.S. Senate to touring with his high school punk band.

“We were writing our own songs, we had no record label or corporate producer. Our music was just the stripped down, basic roots of rock and roll, and people connected with that,” O’Rourke said.

“Since we launched this run for Senate two weeks ago, it’s felt a lot like that — rock and roll at it’s roots.

And it’s making this campaign a helluva lot of fun.”

O’Rourke knows he’s up against some serious

odds. If he beats Cruz in 2018, he’ll be the first Texas Democrat to win a U.S. Senate seat in nearly thirty years. That’s why he’s replacing the standard election strategy with a punk rock mentality: no consultants, no pollsters, no corporate donations, no political action committees. If he’s going up against Cruz, the Tea Party sweetheart backed by billionaire donors, he’s going to do it his way.

In his speech last week, O’Rourke lingered on issues that particularly affect his West Texas district — like immigration, access to health care, women’s reproductive health, and LGBT rights — but emphasized his goal to represent all Texans, from Lubbock to Laredo. In fact, O’Rourke has made an effort in his three-week-old campaign to visit the small, often conservative, towns that lie between metropolitan areas like San Antonio that regularly vote Democrat.

“We’re going to run a 254-county campaign, listening and talking to everyone,” O’Rourke said.

“Everybody counts, nobody is written off.”

O’Rourke managed to avoided mentioning Cruz’ name the entire night. Instead, his criticism was aimed

SCREENSHOT // SEAWORLDCARES.COM

≥

•

MONICA SIMMONS

Takara and her newborn calf

LAST CAPTIVE

SeaWorld’s last orca is born in San Antonio

8

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

Last week, SeaWorld San Antonio welcomed what will be the last orca whale born at the theme park after the company’s promise to end orca breeding. The whale's mother, Takara, is the 25-year-old matriarch of SeaWorld San Antonio and has had four previous children.

“Takara is a great mom and immediately began bonding with and caring for her new baby,” said Chris Bellows, the company’s vice president of zoological operations.

Cute baby whales aside, controversy over whale captivity has cast a shadow on the company ever since the

directly at President Donald Trump. Singling people out because of their religion, race, gender identity, or citizenship, like Trump’s done in his bevy of executive orders and tweets — it's not just anti-American to O'Rourke, it's anti-Texan.

“It’s weak, it’s small, it’s mean...and I gotta tell you, that’s not Texas,” he said. “We’re big, we’re kind hearted, we’re confident, we’re strong, we got this.

We’re not afraid of the rest of the world, we’re not afraid of the future, we’re not going to wall ourselves off.”

After answering questions from the crowd, O’Rourke lingered for photos and handshakes.

Roseanne Penningroth and her husband Eric said they were pleased — and inspired — by O’Rourke’s spiel. Both work at Fort Sam Houston, and were delighted to hear the Congressman’s interest in cutting the fed’s war costs and improving access to affordable health care. “We’re impressed,” Eric said, and Roseanne nodded in agreement But do they think he has a chance?

“If he can fire up people everywhere like he did here tonight,” Eric said, “then, yes.”

2013 release of the damning documentary Blackfish.

SeaWorld has tried to repair the damage by calling off theatrical shows involving orcas and announcing, last year, an end to its breeding program. However, they might have stumbled backwards when they unveiled plans to resurrect their orca entertainment program as “natural orca encounters.”

The fate of Takara and her new baby might be contested, but no one except for PETA is holding their breath. The organization for animal rights called on SeaWorld to “spare her fifth calf a lifetime of

suffering in prison by retiring both mother and child to a seaside sanctuary, where the baby may someday be reunited with Takara’s mother, other children, and grandchildren.”

In January, two notable orcas died in captivity. The first, Granny, was a wild orca and the matriarch of a pod living near Seattle. She was believed to be 105 years old, and had been the subject of much marine research for the last 40. Tillikum, the male orca featured in Blackfish, who was involved in three human deaths, died at 36 years old after battling a bacterial lung infection.

430 Austin St., San Antonio, TX 78215

THURSDAY APRIL 27

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 9

NEWS

COURTESY OF SHUTTERSTOCK

PROFIT PRISONS Private contractor with a shady history gets another immigrant detention center in Texas MICHAEL BARAJAS | @MICHAELSBARAJAS

≥

Texas will get yet another immigrant detention center run by a private company with a cloudy history, the latest sign of the for-profit prison industry’s reversal of fortunes under President Donald Trump.

The private prison company GEO Group announced earlier this month that it’s the recipient of a $110 million, ten-year contract with U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement to build a new 1,000-bed detention center for immigrants north of Houston, not far from where the company already operates a 1,500-bed immigration lockup.

GEO, the federal government’s second-largest private prison contractor, says that by the time the detention center is built at the end of next year, it will generate some $44 million in annual revenue for the company.

“We are very appreciative of the continued confidence placed in our company by U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement,” GEO chairman and CEO George C. Zoley said in a prepared statement.

That confidence hadn’t looked so certain during the final months of the Obama administration,

10

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

which were a trying time for companies that profit off incarcerating people. Yes, private prison companies got fat off federal contracts to run a huge slice of the sprawling immigrant detention system that grew under the “deporter in chief.”

But by last summer, private prison stock took a nosedive as Obama’s Justice Department announced the federal prison system would phase out for-profit contractors because, among other problems, they didn’t save much money nor did they offer “the same level of safety and security” as government-run facilities.

Immigrant rights activists had hoped the feds would expand the phase-out to include immigrant detention centers, too. Instead, Trump won. The day after his election, GEO’s stock rallied 21 percent. Stock for the Corrections Corporation of America, the nation’s largest private prison company (which has since “rebranded” itself CoreCivic), shot up 43 percent the same day.

Less than a week after Trump’s inauguration, the president signaled a dramatic expansion of the country’s detention and deportation complex by signing an executive order that basically instructed

ICE to detain all people suspected of violating immigration laws.

GEO’s long track record of alleged abuses have made it a frequent target for immigrant rights activists, who argue that private prisons routinely warehouse immigrants in appalling conditions.

GEO currently runs several facilities in Texas, the epicenter of the country’s immigrant detention complex, including a lockup for asylum-seeking women and children southeast of San Antonio.

Last year, a judge blocked the state of Texas from licensing that and another family detention center as state-approved childcare facilities. Child welfare experts who testified against state licensing spoke of children losing weight, shedding hair and exhibiting symptoms of anxiety and depression inside immigrant detention centers. Some of the attorneys and advocates who have worked at those facilities claim health care is so shoddy that some kids have to be hospitalized upon release.

Texas lawmakers have proposed legislation this session that would pave the way for the state to license both of those family lockups as childcare facilities.

Pearl L F L AV A C SINCE 18 83

OR

LO

MARKET Join us in our new location at Pearl Park

SUNDAYS 10AM - 2PM

AIN OR HIN

E

Come meet your local food producers!

S

ATPE ARL .COM

SATURDAYS 9AM - 1PM

R

For more info, please visit

With a strong commitment to food excellence, Pearl is host to a producers only farmers market. All Pearl Farmers Market vendors are located within 150 mile radius of San Antonio, Texas, providing fresh, local, and seasonal products that they themselves planted, raised, and harvested.

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 11

FEATURE

MAKE SAN ANTONIO GREAT AGAIN?

ILLUSTRATION BY JEREMIAH TEUTSCH

WORDS BY

MICHAEL BARAJAS

+ ALEX ZIELINSKI

An ethically challenged city, a near-billion dollar bond, and a very strange mayor’s race

On April 3, a small but raucous crowd

gathered midday at the corner of Avenue E and Third Street. Clustered below the San Antonio Express-News’ epic tower-style facade, people vowed to cancel their subscriptions while others hurled insults like “racist,” “bigot” and “xenophobe.”

Some protesters waved signs emblazoned with the words “fake news.”

It was a bizarre, headline-grabbing protest against journalism led by an unlikely figure: Manuel Medina, 12

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

a leading candidate for San Antonio mayor.

Express-News columnist Brian Chasnoff had dug up something about Medina’s past and framed it in a way Medina didn’t like. Medina and his supporters in turn, dramatically called for Chasnoff’s firing. Others in Medina’s circle called for a boycott of the paper.

When the Bexar County Democratic Party chairman filed in December to put his name on the May 6 municipal election ballot, local media labeled Medina the “spoiler” candidate, someone

whose entry to the race would disrupt what was starting to look like a pretty clean, straight-forward election.

The thinking was that Mayor Ivy Taylor, an incumbent fresh off her first full term leading the city, would have a lock on the conservative vote, thanks to her stance against equal rights protections for LGBTQ people and her tanking of a streetcar project that made fiscal hawks see red. Save for some light pockets of Democrat support for Taylor

FEATURE

NA

LO

NZ

O

that’s because the city will need public buy-in (and – which, since its original inception, has grown to likely voter approval) to tackle the many challenges include plans for a private hotel on public land.

Medina has aptly distilled into one very punchy Medina has also embraced one of the city’s campaign line: “Generational poverty on the loudest anti-spending crusaders, former North West Side, institutional violence on the East Side, Side conservative councilman Carlton Soules, as a nightmare traffic on the North Side, and the lack of campaign strategist and lead anti-bond messenger. basic infrastructure on the South Side.”

The pro-bond crowd calls people like Soules a Nirenberg says San Antonio is a city that needs “caver,” or a “citizen against virtually everything.” to address problems it’s neglected for too long Medina’s even brought into the fold Jeff Judson, while also preparing for the future – that way, the a local conservative firebrand and failed politician past doesn’t repeat itself. He and Taylor have both who’s made his name railing against undocumented heralded the long-range, comprehensive plan city immigrants and the LGBTQ community. Last leaders passed last year, dubbed “SA Tomorrow.” month, a document signed by Medina, a devout Medina offers a different choice – fix things for the Catholic, started to make the rounds in political people who live here today, stop worrying so much circles – in it, he vows to protect and defend the about those who will come tomorrow. “We don’t “sanctity of life” and “the traditional family.” need a planner, we need a leader,” he told the But the question of who, exactly, is Manuel Medina Current. In some ways, he’s thrown city leaders’ is what led to this month’s protest outside the daily rhetoric back in their faces, calling his plan for the newspaper. His campaign bio describes him as city “SA Today.” a Mexican immigrant who moved to the county at Nirenberg calls Medina’s vision simplistic, age 3 — someone who worked hard, became a even “dangerous.” “It tells our community that in naturalized citizen, and eventually got rich enough order for us to take care of these off his real-estate and campaign significant needs, these lingering consulting work to move into the areas of disinvestment, that we North Side’s posh, gated Dominion have to sacrifice being a city that community. When he filed to appear aspires to be great,” he said. on the May 6 ballot, Medina declared Nirenberg isn’t the only that he’d lived continuously in San progressive who’s been made Antonio for more than 20 years. nervous by Medina’s presence in Then the Express-News published the mayor’s race. “A lot of us don’t Chasnoff's column reporting that really feel like we know who he is,” Medina had actually worked at a says Graciela Sanchez, who leads Mexican university from 1997 to the Esperanza Peace and Justice 2008, was divorced and married in Center, which hosted a candidate Mexico, and even ran for public office forum at which neither Medina nor in the country as recently as 2005.

Taylor showed. “We mostly hear It was something that appeared to all these bold, vague statements contradict what Medina had told RON NIRENBERG that kind of resonate because voters – not necessarily a campaignwe’re familiar with the problems ending story, but rather the standard he’s talking about – poverty, inequality, developers fact-checking that precedes virtually every big driving the conversation at city hall.” She says political race. Medina now claims he ran for public people in her orbit seem to switch between office in Mexico to boost his consulting work (he Nirenberg and Medina daily. says it was only a two-month-long campaign), and It’s not hard to see why Medina’s message that he was a visiting professor who’d fly back to might give some some left-leaning voters pause. the U.S. after his occasional lectures.

Somewhere along the way in his campaign, Still, Medina and his supporters went nuclear Medina found a convenient punching bag: the after the column, calling it a racist slight against city’s $850 million bond package, which he insists naturalized citizens. The Express-News had is “larded up with millions to special interests.” been the first to call Medina’s style “Trumpian” – He points to money earmarked for supposed something only reinforced by a blatant attack on the “transformational” projects, like $15 million to press for reporting the news.

Not long after Chasnoff’s column went to print, connect Hardberger Park’s eastern and western Medina went full Trump with a new campaign sides (what some critics call a “bunny bridge”), or tagline: “Drain the local swamp.” the millions more slated for Hemisfair Downtown JO

(like in her old East Side city council district), the other leading candidate for mayor, District 8 Councilman Ron Nirenberg, was expected to sweep the liberal and progressive vote with his Julian Castro-like visions of big, “transformational” projects to propel the city forward and prepare for the 1 million-plus people expected to move here by 2040.

Medina bristles at the “spoiler” label – it sounds too pejorative, he says, “like this was theirs to win before I came in and messed things up.”

But mess things up he has. As expected, he’s picked off some progressive and liberal support – including endorsements from the Bernie Sandersinspired San Antonio Progressive Alliance and the local Democratic party he’s led since 2012.

Medina’s campaign took an unexpected turn, however, when he whole-heartedly embraced a staunch fiscal conservative platform and started lambasting the near-billion-dollar city bond that’s also on the ballot this May. The career Democrat suddenly had the support of local Tea Party leaders and anti-development conservatives.

Meanwhile, Medina has firebombed debates and political forums with a doom-and-gloom diagnosis for the city, blaming San Antonio’s problems on what he calls a corrupt “pay-to-play” ecosystem at city hall that spits money at special interests and ignores regular people and their concerns. He’s an attack dog during debates, with a confrontational style city leaders clearly aren’t all that used to. He’s known to stray from the facts on the stump – like calling San Antonio one of the most dangerous cities in the country (it’s not) or “the most economically segregated city in America” (close, but also not entirely true).

But it’s Medina’s simple, populist message that his opponents quietly worry might be connecting with voters – especially now.

Consider Nirenberg’s loud call for ethics reform at city hall this election, a more subtle version of some of the rhetoric and bombast emanating from the Medina campaign. Nirenberg, a selfproclaimed public policy wonk who was first elected to city hall in 2013, routinely cites what he calls a “crisis of public confidence” created by years of ethical lapses – some of which he lays at Taylor’s feet. “We know that the balance of power in San Antonio for the last 50 years has been with the real estate and development community,” Nirenberg told the Current. (Taylor’s campaign would not make her available for an interview with the Current despite multiple requests.)

Reforming the city’s ethics rules and pushing back against special interests are actually two of the hallmarks of Nirenberg’s campaign. He says

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 13

Save the date

Hemisfair Park

100+ salsas, beer, Music + Games

FREE all ages

B u y T i c k e t s at t e x a s s a l s a f e s t . c o m

14

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

FEATURE

Less than two months from Election Day, it looked like the swamp might be starting to bubble.

Just as city leaders were set to award a multi-million dollar contract to a new company to operate downtown’s fleet of riverboats, a selection process that started all the way back in 2014, Mayor Ivy Taylor dropped a bomb. In an email to City Manager Sheryl Sculley, Taylor called for a do-over, claiming lobbyist meddling may have corrupted the process.

Here’s how Taylor explained the problem in her email to Sculley: The top contender for the contract, a Chicago-based outfit called Entertainment Cruises, had hired former mayor and attorney Phil Hardberger to represent the company when it pitched the idea to the city. The city had already told companies bidding for the contract that lobbyists couldn’t attend their pitch meetings.

After getting last-minute approval by the city, Hardberger attended his company’s pitch meeting and spoke on behalf of his client – meanwhile attorneys for some of the other companies didn’t because of the city’s admonition.

Taylor wrote to Sculley that the unfair move had "tainted this process beyond redemption.”

It was a head-spinning controversy that only became more complicated the closer you looked. The company that was reportedly runner-up in the eyes of city staff, the River Walk’s current barge operator Rio San Antonio Cruises, is represented by Bill Kaufman – who, as the Express-News reported, “has been a close, informal advisor to the mayor.”

Nirenberg seized on the spat, saying Taylor had simply derailed the process because she didn’t like the outcome. “She has to explain why she did that,” he said. “And I think the explanation given has been inadequate.” He also claims it’s a pattern of shaky ethical behavior from the mayor that began her fi rst elected year in offi ce.

Shortly after Taylor’s 2015 win, news broke that tenants living in the fi ve rental homes owned by Taylor and her husband had received fi nancial help from the San Antonio Housing Authority under the federal Housing Choice Voucher program, or Section 8. As mayor, Taylor was tasked with appointing SAHA board members, something she told reporters at the time would not at all affect the success of her subsidized real estate business. SAHA attorneys saw it differently. But instead of recusing herself from the SAHA leadership role, Taylor asked city council to pass a special

ordinance to pardon her from any ethics violations involving her real estate confl icts.

Only Nirenberg and District 4 Councilman Rey Saldaña voted against it.

And then there was her role in the colossal Vista Ridge Pipeline project, a 142-mile pipeline from a Burleson County water basin to San Antonio that could deliver up to 20 percent of the city’s water by 2020. The public-private construction project, orchestrated by the San Antonio Water System board, has hit a remarkable number of roadblocks while offi cials hashed out a fi nal contract, Nirenberg says.

Many of those decisions have been ironed out without city MANUEL council input, he claims. After the private company originally picked to lead the massive construction job went bankrupt in 2015, Nirenberg demanded more transparency in SAWS’ decision-making process going forward. The council disagreed, allowing SAWS to continue making contract tweaks behind closed doors.

The councilman has also gained support from environmental groups for pushing SAWS to create a water conservation plan in tandem with the pipeline project. But for some in Medina’s camp, the fact that Nirenberg supports the project at all is a red fl ag. The pipeline would cross the property of roughly 435 landowners in seven counties, opponents say, threatening private wells and fragile watersheds. SAWS customers are expected to pay for this $2.8 billion pipeline in incremental rate hikes over the next few years.

As mayor, Taylor sits on the SAWS board, and is expected to serve as the messenger between city council and board members. It’s a role Nirenberg believes she’s neglected, and has constantly asked the mayor (and the board) for more transparency.

“In the intervening two and a half years since we approved the project, there have been a number of changes that I can best characterize as SAWS, with the mayor’s approval, lowering the bar for a project company because they can’t clear it,” he said.

The mayor has largely dismissed the criticism at public forums. Medina has said he’d kill the project as one of his first moves in office.

But when it comes to this year’s barge snafu, Nirenberg’s got his own tangles. Hardberger has been one of Nirenberg’s most prominent supporters since the start of his political career

in 2013 (Hardberger hasn’t publicly endorsed anyone this election).

It’s the kind of swampy clusterfuck Medina clearly thinks he can use to his benefit this election, something he points to in declaring, “We have an ethics crisis at city hall.”

If some voters believe that, it might because the city does indeed have a history of multi-million dollar taxpayer-funded projects clouded by controversy.

In 2012, for instance, then-assistant CO M A UR T E deputy city manager Pat DiGiovanni NU SY EL OF ME spearheaded the city’s search DIN A committee to find the right developers to tackle San Antonio’s largest-ever construction project: tearing down half of the Henry B. Gonzalez Convention Center just to rebuild it a block away and make room for a “civic park” for MEDINA Hemisfair, at the corner of Alamo and Market Streets.

While that search committee was picking Zachry Corp as one of the companies to get a big chunk of the $325 million project, DiGiovanni was in the process of negotiating a new job with the Downtown development nonprofit Centro, where Zachry head David Zachry served as a board member. The city’s ethics review board later concluded that DiGiovanni violated city ethics rules by failing to recuse himself from a city process that awarded millions of taxpayer dollars to a company whose owner helped him get his new job. There was no punishment, just that DiGiovanni felt “embarrassed” by what he said was a simple mistake.

It’s that convoluted web of infl uence that Medina routinely references when he demonizes the $850 million bond package that goes before voters this election. He says he supports some $550 million of it that would address the city’s basic needs – street, sidewalk, drainage and parks improvements.

But with the help of fi scal conservatives in the wings of his campaign, Medina says he’s identifi ed some $200 million that are giveaways to developers and special interests.

For instance, at the start of the bond process last year, Centro gathered “stakeholders” (mostly Downtown developers and business owners) to come up with their own funding recommendations for a number of large-scale projects they wanted to receive significant public funding. City staff bond recommendations mirrored almost all of Centro’s – save for funding for Hemisfair, which, at $21 million, came in below what Centro had requested. Zachry Corporation is now one of the companies in line

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 15

FEATURE

Elevate Your PALATE MAY 18-21 | SAn AnTOnIO Get your tickets now for the

2017 Culinaria Festival Food+Wine+Spirits+Beer Friday, 5/19: Bubbles & Pearls Saturday, 5/20: Tex-Mex & Tequila Saturday, 5/20: Grand Tasting Sunday, 5/21: Southern Sunday Brunch Sunday, 5/21: Burgers, BBQ & Beer

Experience these events and more with the backdrop of the Texas Hill Country.

Purchase Tickets at CulinariaSA.org Facebook: CulinariaSanAntonio Instagram/Twitter: CulinariaSA

EAT. Drink. GIVE. 16

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

to build a $165 million high-rise development on the edge of the new park – including a boutique hotel that was only made possible after Zachry lobbied the Texas Legislature to tweak a state law that had blocked planners from building it on public parkland.

Or, at least, that’s what Carlton Soules, the former conservative council member and Medina’s fi scal watchdog, is referring to when he says things like: “Voters are being asked to spend $21 million on Hemisfair to make sure developers’ new hotel on our public land has a pretty view.”

When the Obama Administration plucked Julian Castro from the mayor’s seat in 2014,

it was Ivy Taylor who City Council ultimately picked to fill the final year of his term. At the time they chose her, she promised she wouldn’t seek a full term the next time the mayor’s seat was up for grabs.

Six days on the job, Taylor, a Democrat, made good with the city’s North Side conservatives by tanking a downtown streetcar system that Castro had supported. Later that year, she said growing support from some of the city’s business leaders had convinced her to backpedal on her promise to step aside the next mayoral election.

Some have called her a “reluctant mayor,” a city planning academic who didn’t naturally take to the limelight like a Castro. Her use of religion in politics hasn't helped her win fans, either. In a candidate forum earlier this month, Taylor said

that poverty happens to people when they don't have a relationship "their Creator." And in 2013, when Taylor was still a councilwoman, she voted against a nondiscrimination ordinance that would protect LGBT San Antonians from being discriminated against, calling it a "waste of time."

Last week, as Taylor took to the stage inside one of the new convention center’s stately ballrooms, she seemed to have settled into the role, praising the city and business leaders gathered to hear her deliver this year’s state of the city address just days before early voting starts.

On the campaign trail, Medina often paints San Antonio as a city on the road to ruin without radical change. Nirenberg calls us a promising, vibrant city that needs new leadership in order to rise to the many challenges ahead. As for the incumbent in the race, it’s no surprise that negativity’s been stripped from Taylor’s talking points.

“Contrary to some accounts, the evidence shows that not only is the state of our city incredibly strong, but the future of our city is blindingly bright,” she told the crowd.

Nirenberg agrees that San Antonio’s future could and should be bright – but only with a watchful, critical eye at the wheel. In contentious zoning cases that pit real estate interest groups against neighborhoods, he’s broken from Taylor and the majority of council and sided with neighbors. He pushed back during last year’s budget process when Taylor mused about taking funds away from family violence prevention programs and instead spending the money on “workforce development.” When developers managed to cut even vague language related to aquifer protection from the city’s big SA Tomorrow plan, Nirenberg insisted

BECOME THE BEST VERSION OF YOU! From weight loss programs to hormone replacement therapies, we have solutions for patients going through many of the trials that our bodies put us through.

• Weight loss • Hormone replacement thereapy -transgender healthcare • Family medicine and psychiatry -accepting new patients • Anti-aging treatments

For complete list of services, visit

nursepractitionerassociates.com 311 W. Laurel St., San Antonio, TX 78212

1-844-457-8525

e t a r b e l e C de CINCO MAYO WITH

SHOP ONLINE AT AMOLS.COM 710 SOUTH FLORES ST. | 210-227-1457 sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 17

The Mokara Spa is currently seeking talented customer service individuals to join our Spa Front Desk team. You’ll quickly discover the benefits of working at the only Forbes 4-Star Spa in San Antonio!

Positions include:



Front Desk Agents



Male/Female Spa Concierge



Front Desk Supervisor



Medical, Dental and Vision insurance



On-the job training



Discounts on Spa treatments, products, and much more!

1.

Visit www.omnihotels.com/careers

Benefits include:

How to Apply: 2.

Select ‘Mokara’ under the property drop down menu

3.

Create online form to submit application

4.

Call (210) 518-1055 to follow up on application Drug-free workplace EEO/Minorities/Females/Disabled/Veterans

18

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

Join our Mokara Spa team!

FEATURE

the language be put back.

Nirenberg says transportation is a key area where he differs from the other leading candidates in the race. The projections make it pretty clear that, moving into the future, San Antonio can’t just be all about cars. At the city’s current pace of growth, some experts estimate that by 2040, as much as half of San Antonio roadways will face serious traffic congestion, which would make average commuter times increase by 75 percent. (Ever driven in Houston? Think Houston.)

Nirenberg, Taylor and Medina all say they support giving VIA some extra money to boost bus frequency in key routes. Nirenberg actually voted for a proposal that would have done that last year – Taylor, along with others on council, successfully delayed the measure.

Meanwhile, Medina continues to call himself the “transportation mayor” because of his promise to bring high-speed commuter rail connecting Austin and San Antonio – and then, after that, he promises a SA to Monterrey, Mexico line. In public forums, Taylor and Nirenberg have scoffed at Medina’s explanation for how that will happen: by throwing even more money at the Lone Star Rail plan that, after decades of planning and millions in consulting fees, imploded last year.

Meanwhile, Nirenberg has offered a different plan to avoid traffic gridlock – a modern, multimodal transit system that includes commuter rails to connect the city’s major hubs. Nirenberg says he’s talked with northsiders who hated the Downtown streetcar plan that Taylor ultimately scrapped and that they’re “not opposed to a light rail that makes sense.” Nirenberg says he wants a “transportation bond” to fund the design and development of that system.

Medina, on the other hand, wants to improve the city’s 50

worst congested intersections with better coordinated traffi c lights, staggered work hours and some more traffi c cops.

It’s hard to gauge how much impact Medina might actually have.

In late March, the results of a small, 400-voter survey conducted by Taylor’s camp showed that she was on track to capture 53 percent of the vote and would narrowly escape a runoff. A second survey conducted

by Nirenberg’s campaign from around the same time reportedly shows him and Taylor in a runoff.

But does Medina really have little chance of making it to a runoff? St. Mary’s political science professor and longtime local election-watcher Henry Flores says it’s basically impossible to predict, given how unpredictable elections are with such low voter turnout (less than 10 percent of eligible SA voters cast a ballot in the last municipal election) and the nature of Medina’s populist message.

“It’s really hard to figure out just how much populism’s connecting in an election like this,” Flores told the Current. “Just look at Trump’s victory. Nobody saw that coming.

It’s so hard to predict. Ivy and Ron will either be able to hold on to their troops or they won’t.”

One concern that’s fl oating around is whether Medina’s message could threaten any portion of the bond before voters this election. Such ballot measures typically pass with huge margins. But has Medina’s message made people less trustful in local government?

Medina, at times, seems to embrace his spoiler role. He told the Current that, after a recent forum, a voter came up to him saying her friends wouldn’t support him but was glad he’s running. He says that when he asked why, this was the response he got: “Just think of how boring this election would be if it was only Ivy and Ron.”

Get Fit for

Summer Stay Fit for Life energyxfitness.com 5162 Broadway St. (210) 608-4241

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 19

orchestrated, showcasing the sensual splendor of the (almost) nude male form through erotic dance WED —cementing a place for men in a notoriously feminine profession. This glorious phenomenon paved the way for dance companies like Australia’s Thunder from Down Under, a stimulating group of buff, bronze, SPECIAL EVENT beautiful beaus formed in 1991. These drool-worthy Aussies are the entire package with their washboard abs, hairless appendages and sculpted glutes.

Performing choreographed solo and collaborative dances, the performers gradually peel or rip off ▲ It’s hard to comprehend that pornographic movie their clothing until they’re wearing nearly nothing theaters were established before all-male strip shows at all. Occasionally pulling from the pool of enticed — but that’s how it happened. In order to exploit audience members, the dancers perform personal onthe male form, it had to be publicly eroticized first. stage dances for those lucky enough to be chosen.

The 1970s, a time of great sexual revolution and Prepare your eggplant emojis for this sexy spectacle exploration, made way for the proliferation of male of man-meat! $20-$25, 8pm, Aztec Theatre, 104 N. revue shows at clubs popping up around the world St. Mary’s St., (210) 812-4355, theaztectheatre.com. at the time. All-male strip performance groups were — Kimberly Rivera

26

Thunder From Down Under

CALENDAR OUR TOP PICKS FOR THE WEEK

ALTITUDE FILM DISTRIBUTION

COURTESY OF THUNDER FROM DOWN UNDER

CALENDAR

FILM

THU

27

Amy ▲ Described by film critic Daniel Barnes as “a simple picture of a troubled girl who got too famous too fast,” Asif Kapadia’s 2015 documentary Amy built a compelling yet tragic portrait of Amy Winehouse through archival footage (from paparazzi clips to home movies), more than 100 interviews and the late British icon’s own words and lyrics. As it doesn’t sugarcoat her rawly publicized struggle with drug addiction and untimely demise, Amy was met with considerable criticism from Mitchell Winehouse — a stage father who called the film negative, spiteful, one-dimensional, miserable and misleading. In a particularly loaded anecdote that hauntingly parallels her most famous song, Amy’s first manager Nick Shymansky describes an attempt to get the rising star into a treatment center that was rejected by Mitchell — who reportedly said his daughter “didn’t need to go to rehab at that time.” The McNay revisits the BAFTA and Oscar winner as part of its excellent Get Reel Film Series.

Free, 7pm, McNay Art Museum, 6000 N. New Braunfels Ave., (210) 824-5368, mcnayart.org. — Bryan Rindfuss

THU-

Donnell Rawlings COMEDY To close out his 2010 comedy special From Ashy to Classy, Donnell Rawlings offers his own take on a time-honored tradition among 27- African American comics: the “white voice.” Rawlings (Ashy Larry and many others on Chappelle’s Show and Day-Day Price on The Wire) gets a lot of comedic mileage out of the disparity between races, but he insists the goofy white voice is something white and black people have in common — at least while African Americans are at work. The implications of this joke could probably fuel a dissertation, but the closest Rawlings ever comes to lecturing is when he plays the title character in “Dr. Trill’s ‘Take It in the Face System’ Seminar.”

After headlining Thursday’s fourth annual Fiesta Comedy Explosion (benefiting the Priest Holmes Foundation) Rawlings sticks around for four additional shows at Laugh Out Loud. $20-$27.50, 8pm Thu, 8pm & 10:15pm Fri-Sat, Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 541-8805, lolsanantonio.com. — Jeremy Martin

ON SALE MAY 5!

THE 5 BROWNS

SEPTEMBER 3 20

MAY 10

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

MAY 11

MAY 12

MAY 13

MAY 14

MANNY PANDYA

CALENDAR

Suicide Girls: Blackheart Burlesque

THU-

27-

FRI

FILM

28

F SU

▲

COUR T ESY O

29

LS

SAT

GI R

▲ If Fiesta’s onslaught of cascarones, confetti, medal swapping and sloshing beer makes you want to run for the hills, the Hill Country Film Festival might be just what the doctor ordered. Launched in 2010 with a mission to “encourage discovery through visual storytelling,” the four-day gathering brings a thoughtful array of independent films and panel discussions to the heart of the Hill Country. Comprising nearly 90 shorts and features from the U.S., Canada, Spain, Germany, Australia and beyond, the program plays out at the delightfully old-school Fritztown Cinema (which thankfully serves up Texas brews and wine) and wraps each evening with parties around town.

Although ideal for a quick day trip, HFF also makes for an excellent excuse to cozy up in one of Fredericksburg’s 300-plus bed and breakfast options. $10 per film, $200 for a festival pass, Thu-Sun, Fritztown Cinema, 2254 S. Hwy. 87, Fredericksburg, (866) 224-7714, hillcountryff.com. — BR

BURLESQUE

ICID E

Hill Country Film Festival

▶ Founded in 2001 by photographer Selena Mooney, Suicide Girls began as an alternative online forum of models and photographers. The name, originating from a line in Chuck Palahniuk’s 1999 novel Survivor (“It’s the same with all these suicide girls calling me up”) represents women who commit “social suicide” — rebelling against society’s aesthetic and character norms. The company vision includes enabling women to govern their own sexuality, while incorporating their modern interests and aspects of their personality. Choreographed by Manwe Sauls-Addison, the Blackheart Burlesque dance experience showcases a rotating cast of tattooed and pierced women in sexy cosplay inspired by the likes of Star Wars, Harry Potter, Game

AR

of Thrones and Marvel superheroes. The funky-flesh phenomenon is filled with garters, pasties and various stage props.

Hosted by Sunny and Katherine Suicide, the sensual show is a titillating thrill for the alternative community and anyone wanting to broaden their views on beauty and sexuality. $25-$125, 8pm, Alamo City Music Hall, 1305 E. Houston St., alamocitymusichall.com. — KR

King William Fair

FIESTA King William Fair began in 1968 as a small and quirky celebration of the eclectic neighborhood that lends the fair its name. The Fiesta San Antonio favorite now attracts tens of thousands of revelers from all over each year. Aside form being a damn good time, the fair, like most Fiesta events serves a good cause. King William Fair is the main fundraiser of the King William Association, which seeks to “preserve and protect the oldest historic district in Texas and promote the unique cultural heritage of San Antonio.” This year’s King William Fair Parade, which kicks of the party, is themed “Kids in the Hood,” and will feature students from neighborhood schools as grand marshals. As always, a slew of artists and artisans (over 200 actually) will be showing/selling their work, which ranges from ceramics and pottery to childrens’ (and adults’) clothing, from drawings and paintings to glass items, from textile pieces to jewelery, and even more. On the entertainment side of things, the 2017 King William Fair boasts a swell and diverse lineup of talent (on four stages), including nuevo orquestra Latina Volcán, Latin jazz outfit Henry Brun Quartet, puro San Anto garage rock crew Los #3 Dinners, Texas punk country tribe Two Tons of Steel, Mexican folk songstress Azul Barrientos, just to name a few. There will also be assorted street performers and a stage dedicated to song and dance for kiddos. $10, 9am-6pm, King William Historic District, (210) 271-3247, kwfair.org. — James Courtney

For Tickets:

.com 800.745.3000 Theatre Box Office

MAY 18

SIGN UP FOR EXCLUSIVE PRESALES & ANNOUNCEMENTS! TEXT MAJESTICEMPIRE TO 22828

MAY 20

MAY 21

JUNE 16-25

JUNE 17

JULY 5

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 21

SP

MONET, MATISSE...AND EVERYONE IN BETWEEN

On view through June 4

This exhibition is organized by the Brooklyn Museum.

Lead funding at the McNay is most generously given by the Elizabeth Huth Coates Charitable Foundation and The Brown Foundation, Inc. Additional support is provided by the Marcia and Otto Koehler Foundation, the Nathalie and Gladys Dalkowitz Charitable Trust, Frost Bank, The Joan and Herb Kelleher Charitable Foundation, the G.A.C. Halff Foundation, the Director’s Circle, and the Host Committee.

Berthe Morisot, Madame Boursier and Her Daughter (detail), ca. 1873.

Oil on canvas. Brooklyn Museum, Museum Collection Fund, 29.30.

Photo: Sarah DeSantis, Brooklyn Museum

22

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

6000 North New Braunfels San Antonio, Texas 78209-0069 mcnayart.org

CALENDAR NIGHTLIFE

SAT

29

Fiesta Flambeau Parade

FIESTA

RICK CANFIELD

◀ While it may not boast the rich history of the Battle of Flowers Parade (highlighted in our Fiesta Primer), the Fiesta Flambeau stands out as a San Antonio original that’s billed as “America’s largest illuminated night parade.” With the official parade mascot Torchy and the University of Texas Longhorn Band lighting the way, this year’s Flambeau expects to draw 700,000 Fiesta fans into the streets of downtown (not to mention 1.5 million television viewers) for a lively procession featuring elaborately decorated floats, marching bands and equestrian units. Adopting a theme of “City Lights and Celebrations,” the 2017 edition honors grand marshals Guillermo Rodriguez (from Jimmy Kimmel Live!) and Keith Edmondson. $16.50-$30, 7:30pm, (210) 3645349, visit fiestaflambeauparade.org for the parade route. — BR AL

LD RB

29-

The Works and Career of Sandra Cisneros

GO

FA

SAT-

SPECIAL EVENT

AN

▶ Housed in the Alkek Library at Texas State University, the Wittliff Collections are dedicated to “collecting and preserving the creative legacy of Texas, the Southwest and Mexico.” Focused on photography and literary arts, the collection acquired the archive of internationally revered author, MacArthur “Genius” Grant recipient and former San Antonio resident Sandra Cisneros in 2015. Assembled from more than 300 boxes filled with photographs, videos, awards, interviews, drawings and journals revealing early versions of her cherished stories and poems, The Cisneros Papers comes to light through the exhibition “Sandra Cisneros: A House of Her Own” (free, on view through July 1); a daylong symposium featuring panels with Chicanx scholars and artists including Laurie Ann Guerrero, Norma Alarcón and Sonia Saldívar-Hull (free, 10am-5pm Sat) and a reading from Cisneros followed by a discussion between the author and John Phillip Santos (free, 2pm Sun, RSVP requested at the address below). Cisneros fans unable to make the drive to San Marcos can celebrate the occasion closer to home with “An Archive of Her Own,” which combines poetry readings from Xicana writers Claudia Cardona, Bonnie Cisneros, Marilyse Figueroa and Leticia Urieta with an art market curated

by Christina Martinez of VeryThat, music courtesy of DJ Electric Messiah and “Cisneros-themed drink specials including a House On Mango-rita” (free, donations benefit Hays County Women’s Center, 8-9:30pm Sat, La Botánica, 2911 N. St. Mary’s St.). Texas State University, The Wittliff Collections, Alkek Library, 601 University Drive, (512) 245-2313, thewittliffcollections.txstate.edu. — BR

Viva!

Selena!

Drag Brunch ▲ To the delight of many who’ve been craving a drag fix but can’t get away with the whole late-night experience, drag brunches have become a thing in San Antonio.

While nightlife promoter/drag enthusiast Rey Lopez regularly takes over the Amp Room with Sunday Funday extravaganzas catered by La Parroquia Mexicana, Paramour has also proven itself as an unlikely drag destination with such amusing themes as “An Ode to Beyoncé” and “Madonna vs. Britney.” Rising to the occasion of Fiesta, the rooftop bar bows down to the Queen of Tejano with “Viva! Selena!” In addition to performance by local showgirls Kristi Waters, Nilaya Mathews and Jorgeous Waters — not to mention breakfast tacos and “specialty Selena- and Fiestathemed cocktails” available for purchase — the free event showcases the talents of Corpus Christi-based Selena

SAT-

29-

HONEY ANDREWS

DRAG

impersonator Honey Andrews. A native of Mexico who moved to Corpus just before Selena’s murder, Andrews came of age idolizing the late icon and now takes her act to heart, going so far as to recreate a number of her most memorable outfits (including the spotted cowhide jacket and famous purple jumpsuit). Beyond national attention, Andrews routinely touches Selena fans so deeply they get “flashbacks.” “Sometimes, if I’m wearing the exact costume they saw her perform in, they’ll say, ‘I saw her perform in this, I was this old, I took pictures’ … I love hearing stuff like that. Hearing their stories makes me feel more connected to her,” Andrews told Cosmopolitan in 2015. Promising an authentic treat for local Selena fans, one of Andrews’ favorite songs to perform is the timeless “Como la Flor.” Free, 11am-4pm, Paramour, 109 9th St., (210) 307-8740, paramourbar.com. — BR

TUE

2

THEATER

Finding Neverland

Based on the 2004 film of the same name, Finding Neverland is a musical retelling of the story behind J.M. Barrie’s most famous creation, the immortal boy Peter Pan. As it turns out, Peter and the Darlings were inspired by a real family — the Davies, whom the author met by chance in London’s Kensington Gardens. The real Barrie’s traumatic childhood led him to bond deeply with the Davies boys as a way of coping with terrible loss, and Finding Neverland displays his personal and artistic redemption by weaving his London experience with his fictional creation. On stage, our playwright protagonist cavorts with the boys, immersing in make-believe with such gusto that his imaginary creations begin to materialize alongside him. The juxtaposition of Neverland’s Hook and Pan with Barrie and the Davies boys in 20th-century London makes one thing clear: The real “boy who wouldn’t grow up” is Barrie himself. $30-$125, 7:30pm, The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-3333, majesticempire.com. — Kelly Merka Nelson

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 23

CALENDAR

ART Art opening: Juried Visual Arts Students’ Exhibit The fine arts

department at San Antonio College unveils a juried exhibition showcasing the work of students focusing on design, photography, ceramics, printmaking, painting, drawing and digital media. Free, 5-7pm Thursday; San Antonio College, Visual Arts Center, 950 Lewis St., (210) 486-0255.

PARKOUR • TUMBLING • NINJA WARRIOR • PARTIES & EVENTS

LGBT Primary Care

PrEP Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis

HIV Specialty Care

On-site Pharmacy

Mon – Fri, 8am – 4:30pm | (210) 688-5792 | 303 N. Frio | aarcsa.com

”Reflections on Landscapes and Memory” Guest curated by Miami-

THEATER Don’t Talk to the Actors Plans go awry

when the cast and crew of a Broadwaybound play resort to manipulation, divalike behavior, and chaotic abandon to get what they want. $10-$22, 8pm ThursdaySaturday; The Harlequin, Ft. Sam Houston, 2652 Harney Path, (210) 222-9694.

Teatro Audaz Pachanga Dedicated to exploring the varied experiences and

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

The Last Days of Oscar Wilde Derek Berlin

directs Bernard J. Taylor’s original play examining iconic author Oscar Wilde’s final days through his relationships with his wife Constance, Lord Alfred Douglas and Canadian-born Robbie Ross. $10-$15, 8pm Friday- Saturday; The Overtime Theater, 5409 Bandera Road, (210) 557-7562.

based Chris Ingalls, the latest edition of the CAM Perennial unites works by Sister Act Christopher Rodriguez directs more than a dozen local artists — Ana Sherry Gibbs-Houston, Kate Ragan, Anna Fernandez, Guillermina Zabala, Julia Gangai, Krystal Newcomer and Bryd Barbosa Landois, Joe Harjo, Sarah Fox and Bonner in the Woodlawn’s production of Alejandro Augustine Padilla among them. the “divine musical comedy” following Free, 9am-5pm Wednesday-Saturday, disco diva Deloris Van Cartier as she 11am-4pm Sunday, 9am-5pm Mondaymasquerades as a nun after landing on Tuesday; Southwest School of Art, 1201 a mob hit list. $18-$29, 7:30pm FridayNavarro St., (210) 224-1848.

Saturday, 3pm Sunday; Woodlawn Theatre, ”Monet to Matisse: Monet to Matisse: A 1920 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 267-8388.

Century of French Moderns” Marrying nearly 60 paintings and sculptures from the WORDS Brooklyn Museum’s renowned European Amy Stone An associate professor of art collection with a selection of works sociology and anthropology at Trinity culled from the McNay’s like-minded University, Amy Stone visits The Twig to holdings, this sprawling exhibition extends shed light on Cornyation: San Antonio’s far beyond masters Monet and Matisse to Outrageous Fiesta Tradition, a new highlight works by Rodin, Degas, Renoir, book brought to life through 40-plus Cézanne and other legends you may recall interviews, excerpts from scripts and from Art History 101. $15-$20, 10am-4pm more than 100 photos that date as far Wednesday, 10am-9pm Thursday, back as the 1950s. Free, 11am-1pm 10am-4pm Friday, 10am-5pm Saturday, Saturday; The Twig Book Shop, 306 Pearl noon-5pm Sunday; McNay Art Museum, Pkwy, Suite 106, (210) 826-2611.

6000 N. New Braunfels Ave., (210) 824-5368. ”Voices and Vibes” Presented by the FILM interfaith organization Celebration Circle, the National Poetry Month series “Voices Another Country Directed by Molly and Vibes” wraps up Sunday with a musicReynolds and narrated by David enhanced reading from revered local poet Gulpilil (considered one of Australia’s Amanda Flores. Free, 11am Sunday; SAY Sí, finest indigenous actors), this 2015 1518 S. Alamo St., (210) 212-8666. documentary set in a small Australian community speaks to the havoc caused by superimposing a new culture over an old culture and the consequent clashes with all manner of things, such as time, money, garbage and errant kangaroos. Free, 7pm Tuesday; San Antonio Museum of Art, 200 W. Jones Ave., (210) 978-8100.

24

cultures of Latinx people, Teatro Audaz unveils its 2017-2018 season at a reception hosted by Maximo Anguiano with music

by DJ XBOYRD and an appearance by drag trio The Juniors. Free, 9pm Saturday; The Squeezebox, 2806 N. St. Mary’s St.

SPECIAL EVENTS SNKSUP XI Established in 2006 by a group

“bound by passion to share knowledge and love of sneakers,” SNKSUP takes over Cowboys with a showcase inviting sneaker aficionados and collectors to “talk shop and build on the thriving culture.” $5, 2-7pm Sunday; Cowboys Dancehall, 3030 NE Loop 410, (210) 834-7138.

Vapor Dynasty Expo Billed as “a premier

vape and E-cig expo,” this weekend gathering brings together national companies, local business owners and consumers under one roof. $10-$15, 10am-8pm Friday-Saturday, 11am-5:30pm Sunday; San Antonio Event Center, 8111 Meadow Leaf, (800) 340-6652.

super kawaii gifts

June 10

12-3P

JACK GUENTHER PAVILLION AT THE

ART MUSEUM

we have HUEBNER OAKS SHOPPING CENTER 11745 INTERSTATE HIGHWAY 10 | 210.377.2510

ADD US!

@LITTLESURPRISESSATX

Buy Early Bird Tickets Now BRUNCH.SACURRENT.COM

#RCROCKFEST sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 25

COMMUNITY. ENTERTAINMENT. LOCAL EVENTS. GIVEAWAYS.

M A K E E V E R Y DAY, A G R E AT DAY !

WEEKDAYS @9AM ON

LINEUP + TICKETS

26

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

CALENDAR

FIESTA Cornyation Never lost in the deep sea of

favorite of Fiesta-goers. Free admission, 5-11pm Wednesday, 6-11pm Thursday, 6pm-midnight Friday, 11am-11pm Saturday, noon-11pm Sunday; Alamodome, 100 Montana St., (210) 207-3663.

Fiesta events, Cornyation is more than a seasonal favorite — it’s a hyper-local rite of passage that packs a lasting punch not unlike a midnight screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Since its launch Festival de Cascarones Texas A&M as a straight-up spoof of the exclusive University-San Antonio observes Fiesta Coronation of the Queen of the Order of with an all-day event featuring food, the Alamo, Cornyation has seen wild ups games, a dedicated kids' zone, movies in and downs — morphing with changing the auditorium, and live music by The Last times, broadening its focus (from high Bandoleros and Girl in a Coma. Free, 1-8pm society to politics and beyond) and Sunday; Texas A&M University-San Antonio, eventually establishing itself as a major One University Way, (210) 784-1000. fundraiser for HIV/AIDS charities. Inheriting Fiesta de los Reyes Market Square lights a title inaugurated in 1951, James up with 10 days of live music (from tejano Lawnmower Sales and Service proprietor to rock), appearances by cherished Fiesta Jeffrey James steps in the royal role of icon Rey Feo and more than 30 food King Anchovy LII to rule over the Court booths serving up festival favorites. Free, of Insane Privilege $15-$40, 7pm & 10pm 10am-midnight Friday-Sunday; Historic Wednesday-Thursday; Charline McCombs Market Square, 514 W Commerce St., (210) Empire Theatre, 226 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 207-8600.

226-3333.

Ford Mariachi Festival Mariachi bands and Coronation of the Queen of the folklórico dancers perform aboard barges Order of the Alamo The San Antonio drifting down the San Antonio River. Free, Symphony provides live accompaniment 6-9pm Wednesday; San Antonio Riverwalk, as Duchesses make their full-court bows, (210) 227-4262. followed by the presentation of Her

ARTURO O’FARRILL & THE AFRO-LATIN JAZZ OCTET

Royal Highness the Princess and the Fiesta Pooch Parade Therapy Animals of Coronation of Her Gracious Majesty, the San Antonio’s Fiesta favorite returns with Queen. $25-$100, 8-10pm Wednesday; the ever-popular Canine Costume Contest The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (8:15am, registration required) and a (210) 226-3333. parade through the tree-lined streets of Alamo Heights. $25-$30, 7:45-11am Fiesta Artisan Show Artisans offering Saturday; Alamo Heights Swimming Pool, pottery, textiles, jewelry, woodwork, 250 Viesca St., (210) 614-6734. paintings, bead-work and more celebrate Fiesta with an exhibit and sale along the River Walk. Free, 11am-8pm Friday-Sunday; San Antonio River Walk (between the Chamber of Commerce and Rivercenter Mall), (210) 227-4262.

Fiesta Carnival Glittering lights, exciting rides and a wide assortment of festival fare make this carnival a perennial

Fiesta San Fernando San Fernando Cathedral plays host to a celebration of family, food and fun with arts and crafts booths and live entertainment on two stages. Free, 5pm-midnight Wednesday-Thursday, noonmidnight Friday, noon-12:45am Saturday; San Fernando Cathedral, 115 W. Main Plaza, (210) 227-1297.

A POTENTIALLY GLOBAL PERSPECTIVE

PACfest Palo Alto College’s annual Fiesta

gathering promises more than 50 food and crafts vendors, a Fiesta Grilldown and kids' game zone, plus live music from co-headliners David Lee Garza y Los Musicales and Fito Olivares y La Pura Sabrosura. $5, noon-10pm Thursday; Palo Alto College, 1400 W. Villaret, (210) 486-3125.

FRIDAY, MAY 5, 2017 | 8PM | $35

Taste of the Northside More than 50

area eateries serve up samplings of their best dishes alongside a variety of beer and wine at a Fiesta event with live music and proceeds benefiting Brighton Center, a nonprofit supporting children with disabilities. $85, 5:30-10:30pm Wednesday; The Club at Sonterra, 901 Sonterra Blvd., (210) 826-4492. sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 27

ENJOY

MOVIES AT THE MARQUEE 2017

BRING THE ENTIRE FAMILY FOR FREE MOVIES UNDER THE SAN ANTONIO NIGHT SKY. LOAD UP YOUR BLANKETS & SNACKS, OR CHECK OUT OUR ONSITE FOOD TRUCKS. Venue opens at 7:00p.m. and movies will begin 15 min past dusk.

MAY

06

ROGUE ONE: A STAR WARS MOVIE A rebellion built on hope PG-13 | 2h 13min | 2016

THE OUTSIDERS S.E. Hinton’s classic novel about youth

,

PG | 1h 31min | 1983 Classic Car Show 7:00p.m.

JUNE 17 TROLLS Find your happy place PG | 1h 32min | 2016

F

AUG

NR | 2h 16min | 1959

PG | 1h 42min | 2016

MOANA The ocean is calling PG | 1h 53min | 2016

PG | 1h 43min | 2016

13

JULY

PRINCESS BRIDE It’s as real as the feelings you feel

,

Å

AUG

PG | 1h 37min | 1987

ZOOTOPIA Welcome to the urban jungle

STAND AND DELIVER A true story about a modern miracle

PG | 1h 48min | 2016

p

F

07

19

OCT GHOSTBUSTERS They ain’t afraid of no ghost PG | 1h 47min | 1984

,

Å

, LIVE ACTION

F

ANIMATED

SING Auditions begin 2016 PG | 1h 48min | 2016

THE SECRET LIFE OF PETS & FINDING DORY Double Feature PG | 1h 16min/1h 37min | 2016

p

CLASSIC

Å

SEPT

PG-13 | 1h 48min | 1987 Classic Car Show 7:00p.m.

NOV

THROW BACK THURSDAY

3100 Roosevelt Ave, San Antonio Texas, 78214 getcreativesanantonio.com_missionmarqueeplaza

28

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

,

14

16

PG | 1h 36min | 2014

7

Å

04

, 7

SEPT CANTINFLAS Hispanic Heritage Event

PG | 2h 3min | 2017

F

05

PG-13 | 2h | 2016

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST Be our guest

(210) 207-8612 | #missionmarqueeplaza

AUG

F

21

OCT

Å

STAR TREK: BEYOND The frontier pushes back

LA BAMBA True story of Ritchie Valens

PG | 1h 45min | 1988

PG | 1h 33min | 1983

JULY 22

SEPT 02

19

JUNE 15 SIXTEEN CANDLES It’s the time of your life that may last a lifetime

,

F

TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES Meet the new face of justice PG-13 | 1h 40min | 2014

JUNE 10 THE JUNGLE BOOK The legend will never be the same

Å

p

PETE’S DRAGON Some secrets are too big to keep

20

MAY

JULY 08

17

NORTH BY NORTHWEST Sponsored by Slab Cinema

OCT

18

MAY

SPECIAL EVENT

NOV

18

FROZEN The power of sisterly love PG | 1h 48min | 2013

F

The Conversation The exhibition is powerful and very well presented and gives a spectacular glimpse into my Australian Aboriginal Culture.

(Goosebumps). I am extremely excited to be a part of this unique project to support this fantastic collection. It's another example of what inspires me to play basketball.

One of the most visually electrifying I’ve seen at the San Antonio Museum of Art…the Lam gift seems to dovetail especially nicely with the Museum’s particular niche as perhaps the least Eurocentric of American encyclopedic museums.

—Devon Britt-Darby, artsandculturetx.com

—Patty Mills, San Antonio Spurs point guard, Instagram post

I was slack-jawed in the special exhibition Of Country and Culture. I love abstract art and this took abstract to a whole 'nother universe.

Engrossing exhibit of Australian Aboriginal art that spans both traditional male works with amazingly recent modern paintings by Aboriginal women.

—Lnwyd, Trip Advisor reviewer, Aberdeen, Maryland

—maybeen, Trip Advisor reviewer, Chicago

Only through May 14!

SAN ANTONIO MUSEUM of ART | 200 West Jones Avenue | samuseum.org | sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 29

30

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

ARTS + CULTURE

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS + BRYAN RINDFUSS

FIESTA PRIMER

Medals • The earliest version of medals came by way of King Antonio in 1946, when the faux-royal handed out commemorative coins, according to Henry Graham’s History of the Texas Cavaliers. Fast-forward to 2017 and medals are one of Fiesta’s hottest items. Made by non-profits to help fundraise, companies to get the word out, or locals trying to one-up each other’s designs, nabbing medals has grown into a mania led by the Fiesta Medal Maniacs, which command the attention of more than 12,000 followers on Facebook and Instagram.

This year’s most sought-after trinket? A lotería-inspired Donald Trump medal that’s helping make Fiesta great again.

Here’s Your Guide to All Things Fiesta The biggest part of the year is here and even native San Antonians need a refresher when it comes to Fiesta must-haves and must-dos.

Aside from urging you to hydrate and stock up on sunscreen and cash, here’s a quick explainer on what you should know about San Antonio’s largest celebration.

JULIÁN P. LEDEZMA

JULIÁN P. LEDEZMA

Fiesta Medals

COURTESY OF BATTLE OF THE FLOWERS

King Anchovy LII Jeffrey James

Battle of Flowers Parade

Cascarones • Though origins are murky, cascarones are a staple during Fiesta traditions.

Buy them from your local H-E-B, roadside stands or Fiesta on Main. Finesse is mandatory: Crack them in your hand and sprinkle the confetti guts over your victim’s head. We’re still civilized, even if it’s Fiesta.

The Three Kings • Although not quite as wondrous as the Three Wise Men, the three kings of Fiesta still come bearing gifts each year in the form of charitable contributions to local nonprofits. Established by the Texas Cavaliers in 1927, King Antonio is tasked with raising funds for children’s charities before appearing at schools, military bases, hospitals and events throughout Fiesta. Initiated by LULAC in 1947 with a goal of raising scholarship funds for underprivileged youth, El Rey Feo officially joined Fiesta in 1980 and serves as “The People’s King,” similarly going beyond parades and parties to visit nursing homes, schools and hospitals.

Since his first appearance at Cornyation’s debut (1951’s Court of the Cracked Salad Bowl), King Anchovy has evolved into a key Fiesta figure who rules over a riotous court during three nights of costumed satire benefiting local AIDS charities and theater arts scholarships.

Coronation Gowns • Since 1909, The Order of the Alamo has crowned its own Fiesta royalty at Coronation — a glitzy affair showcasing a Queen, Princess and 24 Duchesses donning elaborate dresses and trains encrusted with beads and rhinestones. Often weighing between 60 and 100 pounds and costing $35,000 or more, the royal robes follow specific court themes ranging from birds and flowers to museums and the military. While Coronation seats are admittedly “very limited to the public,” theses showpieces can often be experienced firsthand at the Witte, which recently unveiled “Natural Beauty: Fiesta of Land, Water, and Sky,” an exhibition of gowns inspired by Texas landscapes.

Accessories • Where to start? If you’re collecting medals, you’ll want to showcase your finds across your chest. Don’t ruin a well-made guayavera — get a sash. It gives you plenty of room to store your scores and makes you feel like royalty. Need shade from the ever-present sun that’ll beat down on you come sundown at Taste of New Orleans/NIOSA/Oyster Bake or during the daytime parades? Fashion yourself a hat: the bigger, the better. Head to Amols’ or Michael’s and clear them completely out of their brightest tulle and glitter. Paper flower crowns are also an “it” accessory. Score one from Market Square, El Mercado, or make your own. If the whole extraness that is Fiesta hasn’t quite struck you yet, if you’re not a hat person, if you’d rather show off new kicks than tackle the arduous task of pinning several dozen medals to a vest, show San Antonio your shoes. The tradition directly relates to the Queens and princesses who often wear decked out sneakers, boots or other footwear under their beaded gowns.

Parades • At the very center of the 10-day celebration, Fiesta’s parades run the gamut from traditional reverence to whimsical and wacky. If you can only attend one, most would point you toward the Battle of Flowers Parade (April 28), the over-the-top procession that sparked Fiesta itself back in 1891. Produced entirely by women and designed to honor the heroes of the Alamo, the beloved tradition brings together all the hallmarks of Fiesta for a procession through downtown featuring elaborately decorated floats, decked-out royalty, ROTC units, local celebs and marching bands. Fiesta fanatics, however, will tell you to attend as many as possible — including the Texas Cavaliers River Parade (April 24), the wildly illuminated Fiesta Flambeau Parade (April 29), the dog-centric Fiesta Pooch Parade (April 29) and the wonderfully wacky King William Fair Parade (April 29). sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 31

MED SPA 19234 STONEHUE RD SAN ANTONIO, TX 78258

THANK YOU SAN ANTONIO FOR VOTING US BEST MED SPA!!!!

KeyLife Med Spa, where aging is optional 210.481.9125

BOOK YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY: KeyLifeMedSpa.com

411 BONHAM SATX 78205 | 210-224-9219

Official Coronation & Pre-Party of

Chips King & Salsa Queen!

Fri, April 28th | 6-9PM | The Davenport | 203 N Presa St.

Royalty, Casino Fun Food, Drinks & More! contact Us: 210.223.3131 X260 | events@sanantonioyouth.org purchase tickets at chipsnsalsafiesta.com *All proceeds raised will benefit the youth served by SA Youth* 32

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

ARTS + CULTURE

JULIÁN P. LEDEZMA

COURTESY OF KING WILLIAM FAIR PARADE

JAIME MONZON

ESSENTIAL EVENTS:

Chicken on a Stick

King William Fair Parade

Cornyation A Day in Old Mexico Charreada • Presented by the Asociación de Charros de San Antonio, this Fiesta favorite champions charrería (often described as Mexican rodeo) via 10 official suertes — competitive roping and riding events performed in period costumes. $5-$15, 3pm Sun, April 30, Charro Ranch, 6126 Padre Drive, (210) 396-9752, sacharros.org.

A Night In Old San Antonio • Bring comfortable shoes, plenty of cash and make sure you’ve got a meeting spot in mind when heading into La Villita for NIOSA. The 69th presentation of this beloved bacchanal features 15 cultural areas filled with foods from across the globe, plenty of cerveza and the newly added craft beer booths with kegs full of Ranger Creek and Busted Sandal’s Finding Friday cans.

Proceeds of the volunteer-led four-day festival go toward the San Antonio Conservation Society. Don’t miss new food items such as chamoyadas, or the classic Bongo-k-bobs, Maria’s Tortillas or sausage sampler. $12 advance, $15 at the door, free for children 12 and under, 5:30-10:30pm, April 25-28, La Villita, 418 Villita St., (210) 226-5188, niosa.org.

SCOTT BALL

Cornyation • Launched in 1951 as a spoof of the Coronation of the Queen of the Order of the Alamo, Cornyation has evolved into a bawdy, all-encompassing satire that’s raised upward of $2 million for AIDS charities. Stepping into the royal role of King Anchovy LII, Jeffrey James is set to rule over Cornyation’s Court of Insane Privilege during three nights of outrageous lampoonery. $15-$40, 7pm & 10pm April 25-27, Charline McCombs Empire Theatre, 226 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 226-3333, majesticempire.com.

Fiesta Gartenfest • Beethoven Maennerchor turns a spry 150 with its mission of preserving the German language and culture with another bash. Pack the dirndl and lederhosen, grab your favorite stein and join the festivities that spans three nights. With polka, German choirs, pitchers of Spaten, bratwurst, potato pancakes and more. $3 in advance, $5 at the door, free for children 12 and under, 5 p.m. April 26-28, Beethoven Maennerchor, 422 Pereida St., (210) 222-1521, beethovenmaennerchor.com.

King Antonio XCIV at Fiesta Arts Fair

King William Fair • From humble beginnings as a one-block art exhibit back in 1968, the King William Association’s signature Fiesta event has grown into a can’t-miss festival spread throughout the historic neighborhood. After kicking off with a wonderfully wacky parade, King William Fair fills the tree-lined streets with a wide assortment of artsy vendors, diverse live music on multiple stages, dozens of food booths (gyros, gorditas, pizza, cupcakes, you name it), craft beer and margaritas, plus an ever-popular Kid’s Kingdom equipped with rides, games and crafty activities. $10 (free for kids 12 and under), 9am6pm Sat, April 29, King William Historic District, (210) 271-3247, kwfair.org. sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 33

MON - TUE 11AM - 4PM WED - SUN 11AM - 9PM

FROZEN TREATS

WITH REAL

@PALETERIASANANTONIO

INGREDIENTS

(210) 954-6753 | PALETERIASANANTONIO.COM 510 SOUTH ALAMO ST, STE. 104 SAN ANTONIO, TX 34

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

ARTS + CULTURE

ALEJANDRA LOPEZ

CULTURA AS COMMODITY

PHOTO COURTESY OF AZTLAN LIBRE PRESS

Columnista Bárbara Renaud González highlights the consumption of our culture

≥

As San Antonians, we often put our city inside of a box. We have the River Walk, the Alamo, margaritas y Fiesta, Mexican restaurants on every corner — all tied neatly together as the perfect package. And we’ve learned how to sell this package to out-of-towners, marketing it as our cultura.

But do we really believe that culture to be our own?

Does that shiny, colorful version of San Antonio, laced with its papel picado while serving puffy tacos to tourists, really belong to us?

In the August 2002 edition of the Esperanza Peace and Justice Center’s newsletter La Voz, columnista Bárbara Renaud González writes that “San Antonio has a majority Latino/ Chicano/Mexican American population that is disproportionately poor and uneducated. Its business is tourism, driven by the cultural richness of Tex-Mex culture.” This critical theme of San Antonio’s culture as an exotic commodity is González’s specialty — her pan y mantequilla — and in her latest collection of columns and clippings, Las Nalgas de JLo/JLo’s Booty: The Best & Most Notorious Calumnas & Other Writings by the First Chicana Columnist in Texas 1995-2005, there’s no holding back.

With an education in social work and a background in journalism, González has made a name for herself as a critical voice in Chicana/Latina culture, often calling attention to the machismo identity of Mexicanos, the blurred lines of Mexican-American identity — especially in South Texas — and the lost traditions of our ancestors.

Las Nalgas de JLo features a

collection of González's previously published work, including multiple pieces from her monthly column at the San Antonio ExpressNews during the mid-’90s and early 2000s, as well as articles and reviews that were never published due to their content, which some have considered to be slanderous or false. This book, however, reassures you that they were not.

Though her work has appeared in the Los Angeles Times, NPR’s Alt.Latino and other national publications, Las Nalgas de JLo is intimate. Each column gives a close look into González’s deepest thoughts and often reads like a diary that could belong to your wise, older tía. Praising local figures like union leader Emma Tenayuca, the first Latina to serve on city council, María Antonietta Berriozábal, and Esperanza Center director Graciela Sanchez, González’s admiration for homegrown activism in Las Nalgas is expressed with an authentic voice — a voice that will be familiar to San Antonians.

To kick off the national book launch, Aztlan Libre Press, in collaboration with the Esperanza Center, will host a pachanga on Friday, April 28, featuring a performance by conjunto musicians Juan and Armando Tejeda, plus readings by Nadine Saliba, Maria Salazar, Araceli Herrera Castillo, and, of course, González herself.

In a 1991 article published by the Los Angeles Times titled, “We Must Search the Soul to Find the Mexican Conscience,” González wrote that “Language is a bridge to culture.”

For anyone looking to build that bridge, Las Nalgas de JLo is an excellent place to start.

Las Nalgas de JLo National Book Launch

Free, 6-10pm Fri, Apr. 28, Esperanza Peace and Justice Center 922 San Pedro Ave., (210) 228-0201, esperanzacenter.org

6411 Bandera Rd #2 • 210.627.6431 sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 35

3233 NORTH ST MARY’S STREET (210) 320-1773 | WoodFiredCoffee.com MON - FRI: 6 AM - 9 PM | SAT - SUN 8 AM - 6 PM

BRUNCH BLOODY MARY(bar)

BEST ••••••••••••••••••

•••••••••••••

••••••••••••••••••

(to AT&T Center)

#

3 SPORTS BAR

thank you for voting COVER 3 ! ••••••••

W e ekend Bnd R U N C H a BLOODY MARY BAR

SATURDAY & SUNDAY · 11AM- 3PM

OPEN AT 10AM ON MOTHER’S DAY

www.COVER-3.com | SCRATCH KITCHEN. LOCALLY OWNED. TEXAS GROWN. | 36

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

1806 NW LOOP 1604 | LOCATED @ HUEBNER & 1604

COURTESY OF NEON

SCREENS

MONSTER MASH Colossal mixes genres and narratives with near-perfect results MARC SAVLOV

≥

Fantastic Fest’s favorite filmmaker and a guy who really, truly loves drunken karaoke, Nacho Vigalondo’s fourth film launches him out of the genre ghetto and into a semblance of mainstream (i.e., big stars, bigger budget) filmmaking. Longtime fans can relax, as this isn’t a sellout anymore than the director’s previous film Open Windows was a porn film. A very Vigalondo movie, Colossal mashes up dual narratives from multiple genres and then puts everything through the gonzification machine. If William S. Burroughs had made a sci-fi romcom, it might have looked something like this, and that’s very high praise indeed.

It’s near impossible to write about Colossal without at least a few spoilers, and as lovers of this always interesting filmmaker will attest, it’s always best to enter the Nachoverse with no idea of what you’re getting into. (Vigalondo’s mind-melting first feature, the wildly, wonderfully, and temporally abstruse Timecrimes remains the single best example of my forcing everyone I know to watch and rewatch a movie umpteen times.)

That said, here goes. Anne Hathaway is the alcohol-

besotted Gloria, who’s kicked out of her boyfriend Tim’s (Dan Stevens) Manhattan apartment after one blackout too many. Nonplussed, she returns to the small town where she grew up and holes up in the (conveniently abandoned) family home. There she meets semi-cute redux with childhood bestie, Oscar (Jason Sudeikis), now the owner of the local shabby-chic watering hole.

What better place for a not-recovering alcoholic to get a waitressing job? The pair, along with barflies Joel and Garth (Austin Stowell, Tim Blake Nelson), more or less continue drinking the town dry even as nightmarish news from abroad arrives in the form of a gigantic, Godzilla-esque kaiju stomping the bejesus out of Seoul at the exact same time every morning. There’s a connection here, emotional and otherwise, but the less said the better. Chaos of every stripe follows, and slowly but surely you realize Vigalondo’s made a snarly, bizarro-world female empowerment film that takes itself and its characters — along with their selfdestructive life decisions — very seriously.

Half the pleasure here comes from watching

Hathaway and Sudeikis play against type. Neither drunken Gloria nor borderline stalker Oscar is anyone you’d want to hang out with after the age bracket of 30-something and yet they’re richly drawn and maniacally believable characters. (Vigalondo penned the script in addition to directing.) Colossal gets bogged down for a while with foreshadowy flashbacks that don’t totally click, but the last third of this relatively downbeat yet gleefully bonkers movie is so chock-full o’ crazy (in a good way) that the multiple storylines ultimately coalesce into something just this side of awesome. For sure, this is the most ambitious entry into Vigalondo’s always interesting oeuvre, touching as it does on everything from love to self-loathing, and from people getting hammered to the populace of Seoul getting pounded. Hathaway and Sudeikis totally nail their respective roles (kudos to the great Tim Blake Nelson, to boot), and while Colossal falls shy of perfection, so does real life. Who would have thought Anne Hathaway plus giant-ass monsters plus booze would result in such a smart, genre-defying, femme self-actualization manifesto? Nacho Vigalondo, that’s who.

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 37

MON- TUES 5:30AM-5PM • WED-THURS 5:30AM-9P FRI-SAT 5:30AM-10PM • SUN 7:30AM-3PM

521 E Woodlawn Ave. • 210.737.8646

Authentic Thai Cuisine

Open 7 Days a Week

Fruteria | Taqueria | Mariscos | Cerveza

BUY ONE 16OZ MIXED FRUIT CUP GET THE SECOND ONE 1/2 OFF (Offer good M-F 3pm-7pm)

226 26 W Bitters Rd #124

(210) 545-3354 • saebthainoodlesa.com

1502 Bandera Rd | (210)431-7786 loscocosmexicanrestaurant.com

®

Medical Center 2414 Babcock Rd San Antonio, TX 78229

(210) 255-1863

In the southern hillsides near Naples, Italy two brothers, Luciano and Gennaro Centofanti grew up learning traditional family recipes from their Momma (everyone called Nonna Lina). She taught them the importance of using only the finest & freshest ingredients. When they came to San Antonio, they brought with them Nonna’s passion for great food and her True Italian Passion for family. Step into a Luciano’s near you today and become part of OUR family. Italy is just around the corner...

38

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

FOOD

DINNER SHOW JESSICA ELIZARRARAS | @JESSELIZARRARAS

CO

UR

T EY

SO FS

CO TT

PE

PPE

R

AND A

At Frank, The Magicians Agency suspends reality while

≥

Consider it a form of escapism. You’re unplugged from Facebook. You’re not double tapping on Insta, and you’re unaware of what’s going on in the world, near or far. It’s just you, your hot dog, an hour’s worth of illusions and Frank, the former church-turned-theaterturned-restaurant and bar.

Parents of young kids might already be familiar with The Magicians Agency, which had runs in previous years at the Magik Theatre. The Magicians Agency is a two-hour, all-ages magic set that tells the tale of a magician-run secret organization and its latest recruit, Scott Pepper.

Pepper, an England native who’s spent the last 24 years pursuing the art of magic, leads the set, held most Tuesdays and Saturdays since March and whose residence will last through August. Pepper and Frank owner Daniel Northcutt connected when Pepper was searching for a venue.

“We’ll do anything, we just love having fun, we’re event-based, nothing’s completely out of the norm for us,” says Northcutt.

Once Pepper, 34, retrofitted the stage with new curtains and lights, the Magicians Agency was relaunched. It’s a family-friendly show geared toward locals and tourists alike.

“We’re all about experiences and making memories and that’s what happens when they come here and see a phenomenal magic show. They’re taking memories home from Scott, from Frank, from San Antonio,” Northcutt says.

Here’s a breakdown of that experience.

The night includes dinner with guests choosing from a

set menu of Frank’s signature dogs, choice of side and soda or iced tea. At $35 for general admission, it almost feels like a steal, considering you’re about to get your mind blown during the show.

Once all attendees trickle in for a 5 o’clock show, they grab seats in the comedy club-style arrangement, place their orders and watch as Pepper or assistant Jay Garcia go around the tables doing close-up magic tricks using cards or rope. The audience during our performance included a few pre-teens, duos out on date night (even a one-year anniversary), and older married couples. Service is quick and efficient as they have to serve everyone before the show starts, so you’re eating and settling in within the hour.

For Pepper, the new mix of audience members (unlike at that Magik Theatre) means he has more creative wiggle room at his new location, where he caters to skeptics, people who want to disconnect for an hour or two or people that just love magic.

These aren’t Gob Bluth’s illusions, either.

The Magicians Agency begins with the night’s set-up: the new recruit’s here to earn the last few badges needed to qualify as an agent, think young James Bond if 007 was into sawing people in half and had a serious penchant for playing cards. We learn all this through a projection on the wall with plenty of bells and whistles. Without divulging much, it’s safe to say the show is campy, but professional. It’s awe-inspiring, funny, and light. Even as a

•

Daniel Northcutt and illusionist Scott Pepper at Frank

skeptic of all things magic, it’s hard not to get swept away by the evenly paced show, with Pepper commanding the attention of the audience with his rapid-fire jokes and witty comebacks to the occasional heckler.

“On my way up to working cruise ships, I had to work some pretty interesting venues. Comedy clubs, holiday parks, ferries, things like that. Where hecklers were guaranteed! So I had to learn on my feet the hard way. So now I still have a pocket full of comebacks and quips that I can use if people think they want to be clever,” Pepper said via email.

The show ends just as it started, with an impressive illusion using assistant Heather Bruno that’ll leave nonbelievers scratching their heads. The 34-year-old will be showcased this summer in the CW’s Masters of Illusion, so get to Frank before he hits it big and disappears.

Tickets, $35-$50, can be purchased at magiciansagency. com. Frank is located at 1150 S. Alamo St.

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 39

GodaI Sushi SUSHI

HAPPY HOUR TUE & THUR: 5 - 6PM

LUNCH 11am-2:30pm | DINNER 5-10pm

SATURDAY 5-10pm | CLOSED SUNDAY

MON, TUES, SAT & SPURS NIGHT Voted 2013 BEST SUSHI

BY SA CURRENT READERS

40% OFF 750ML BOTTLES OF WINE

Find Us On

or at godaisushi.com

11203 WEST AVENUE 78213 • 210.348.6781

T h e R e s ta u r a n t o n S t i lt s

D i n g vHinogw Ser

tC hhinee sBe ef osotd S in c e 1 9 8 3

410 AND CALLAGHAN | 210-549-8881 | dinghowsa.com 40

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

FOOD

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS

FOOD COURT Taco Throwdown returns, Hot Joy heads north, and the Folc burger is back JESSICA ELIZARRARAS + MONICA SIMMONS

•

Why, yes, that egg will get everywhere.

More Tacos

> Calling all professional taco eaters — ok, amateurs, too. The seventh annual Twisted Taco Truck Throwdown has been announced for Saturday, May 13 from 3 p.m. to midnight. As in years past, it will be at the VFW Post 76 at Broadway and 10th St. Tacos al pastor are $1 and Twisted Tea is $3 all day.

Every year, thousands flock to taste the best tacos from over 20 local food trucks, to judge and vote on the People’s Choice Winner, and to revel in the florid taco community here. Local celebrity judges (last year included Judge Spurs Jesus) make the crowning decision for the Grand Champion and Freestyle Category Winners.

This year Finding Friday, Los #3 Dinners and The SanAntunes will regale taco-toting attendees with live performances. — MS

Hot Joy 2.0

>The Big D is about to get a splash of fish sauce by way of Hot Joy, which is collaborating with the Front Burner restaurant group to open a location inside an old Texas Land & Cattle Co. at 3130 Lemmon Ave. Announced via press release to Dallas media on Tuesday afternoon, Hot Joy 2.0 is slated to open mid-July in Uptown Dallas with a similar menu made up of all the HJ hits, along with a few Big-D exclusives. The Empty Stomach Restaurant Group teamed up with Front Burner, known for Velvet Taco, Sixty Vines, Whiskey Cake, Ida Claire, Mexican Sugar and Legacy Hall. Randy DeWitt, CEO of Front Burner shared why he was so charmed with the eatery in the first place.

“...as soon as I walked in, I understood why. The vibe was wild, they had the music turned up to 11 and the food was really different, but not in a pretentious, over-the-top way. I must’ve ordered everything on the menu because I was so intrigued by what I was tasting,” DeWitt said in the release.

The new location will feature a similar opening team to HJ’s opening with John Philpot at the helm of the menu instead of former executive chef Quealy Watson.

“It’s a crazy great part of Dallas to be in, and we’ll be there for two years at a minimum. It might go longer,” said Hot Joy co-owner Chad Carey. Artist and interior designer Gregorio Mannino will also be part of the opening team.

The Dallas Hot Joy will be almost two and a half times bigger than the original location.

Described as both buzzy and quirky by Dallas media, Hot Joy first opened as a pan-Asian pop-up inside The Monterey in October 2012. It later opened inside the former China Latina in 2014 and quickly received nods from local and national media. It was named one of 2014’s Best New Restaurants by BonAppétit.

“It’ll be very similar, but we’re going to have a few oneoff Dallas things on the menu,” Carey said. “We’re kind of allergic to chains and reproducing restaurants that way.”

That being said, if the restaurant does well in Uptown, Empty Stomach could very well look for a more permanent location, and maybe even beyond.

“If it works in Dallas, and this is definitely putting the cart before the horse, there is a high likelihood we would expand to other cities,” Carey said.

Regardless of how HJ performs immediately after opening, they’ll have a few loyal customers to start. Carey,

a Dallas native who has made San Antonio home for the past 17 years, still has some family members there.

Buns Hun

> Just a day shy of its two-month anniversary, Bexar Pub finally launched their food program this past weekend with a solid menu of fried chicken, tacos, nachos, fries and, yes, the Folc Burger.

The menu ranges from $4 to $28 (for 12-pieces of chicken with fries and biscuits), and the burger clocks in at $12. Slight changes have been made. Because of the size of the kitchen, the patty of brisket and pork belly is no longer ground in-house, but they left that to the capable hands of Bolner’s Meat Market. And the bun, which was baked in Folc’s own wood-burning oven is now made by the staff at The Bread Box, which helps soak up the runny egg. Otherwise, the burger, named last year’s Best Burger in the State by Texas Monthly, remains intact with just the right amount of Folc sauce, pork belly, bread and butter pickles that make for a ridiculous bite, but also a solid mess. It’s worth all the napkins you’ll use.

The burger resurfaced after Folc and Park Social closed its doors earlier this year after disputes with their landlord. And it brought some friends, as the menu also includes four more burgers to choose from along with a long list of add-ons.

114 Brooklyn Ave., (210) 236-7828.

Send food and nightlife news to flavor@sacurrent.com.

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 41

COME SEE OUR ‘ALMOST-MIXOLOGIST’

6310 CALLAGHAN RD • (210) 342-7321 • MON-SAT 11AM-2AM & SUNDAYS 12PM - 2AM WWW.WHISKEYSMITHSSANANTONIO.COM

LGBT Primary Care

PrEP Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis

HIV Specialty Care

On-site Pharmacy

Mon – Fri, 8am – 4:30pm | (210) 688-5792 | 303 N. Frio | aarcsa.com

2623 N. St. Mary’s St. 78212 San Antonio, TX

76 TAPS

FRIENDLY EATS TILL

MIDNIGHT

OF

LEAPINLIZARDPUB.COM

CRAFT BREW

7 DAYS A WEEK

OVER 300 BOTTLE

KID & DOGGIE

FRIENDLY

DOWNTOWN SAN ANTONIO’S BEST CRAFT BEER SELECTION!

&

CAN CHOICES

ICE HOUSE 943 South Alamo • 210.224.BEER (2337)

THE PLACE WHERE LOCALS

COME TO

OPEN AT NOON DAILY!

FRIENDLY GROWLERS AVAILABLE | FRIENDLY EATS TILL MIDNIGHT

609 South Alamo Street | Southtown San Antonio | 210.227.2469

Mon - Thu: 5P- Midnight 42

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

|

Fri & Sat: 5P - 2A

|

Sun: 5P - Midnight

PARTY! O P E N E V E RY DAY ! 2 P - 2 A NEVER A COVER | 21 & UP!

WATCH NCAA & NBA GAMES HERE!

302 E. COMMERCE (BETWEEN PRESA & NAVARRO) | 210) 271-9494

NIGHTLIFE

MONICA SIMMONS

IN ALCOHOL NEWS… COURTESY OF RANGER CREEK BREWING & DISTILLING

COURTESY OF PARAMOUNT PICTURES

TABC head steps down, Ranger Creek accolades and more

JESSICA ELIZARRARAS | @JESSELIZARRARAS

Upcoming Events April 27 // Missing this Mean Girls-inspired party would be social suicide. Brass Monkey pays homage to the 2004 classic with music by VJ Glitoris, a screening of the movie, catchphrase buttons, candygrams, 75 cent wells, and $2 Fireball shots. On Thurzgayz, we wear pink. No cover, 10pm-2am, 2702 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 4804722, facebook.com/brassmonkeytx.

Booze Cop Exits

>The Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission announced Monday that its executive director, Sherry Cook, will step down from her position after allegations of misusing agency money.

In March, the Texas Tribune unearthed records showing that top TABC officials have spent at least $85,000 on boozy and unnecessary out-of-state travel since 2011. Cook herself was depicted in an inner-agency Photoshopped picture downing bottles of Lone Star, apparently on her way to a National Conference of State Liquor Administrators in California.

In a statement, Cook said, “It has been an honor and a pleasure serving the people of Texas for all these years. I want to thank all of the employees and peace officers at TABC for their hard work, dedication and support. I’m very proud of all they have accomplished keeping Texans safe and regulating a growing industry.”

Local Brewery Wins Gold in World Beer Competition

> Ranger Creek Brewing & Distilling sent its newly released San Antonio Lager to the World Beer Championships in Chicago this January with little more than a pat on its pretty turquoise bottom, and the hope that it would represent the city well. A few months later, and the lager has returned home from its tour with the title of 2017 Best Munich Helle.

“It’s a very exciting award for us,” said co-founder and head of operations TJ Miller in a press release.

“I hope everyone in San Antonio feels proud because we brewed this beer for you.”

Judges gave it 93 points on a 100-point scale and deployed such colorful descriptions as “fruity, floral aromas,” “orange blossom honeycomb,” “toasted tortilla with a supple medium body,” and “intriguing, long lemon pepper muffin finish.” It’s no wonder that San Antonio Lager toasted industry giants such as Sam Adams.

April 29 // Chef Bania Ruiz-Arteaga and Joseph “Tbone” Terrebone will take over the kitchen at ChaChas for a vegan dinner and Herradura tequila tasting. The menu includes jackfruit mole with fresh corn polenta, and a flight of raw vegan desserts along with Ruiz-Arteaga’s main. A tequila presentation of Herradura’s silver, reposado and añejo by Ricardo Ruiz will be included with the dinner. $46.50, 6:30-9pm, ChaChas Mexican Restaurant, (210) 681-2066, facebook.com/chachasmexicancuisine.

May 4 // The Squeezebox hosts Happy Hour y Más!, a fundraiser for the San Anto Cultural Arts with DJ Ruben D, Los Nahuatlatos, Maya Guiarro, members of Bombasta and organization-inspired cocktails with a portion going directly toward youth programming. $3 cover, 5:30pmmidnight, 2806 N. St. Mary’s St., sananto.org.

May 5 // Learn the importance of traditional mezcalmaking in Mexico with Viva Mezcal, a documentary that seeks to protect and raise awareness for this craft. With interviews of biologists, maestro mezcaleros, researchers and distributors, director Pedro Jimenez Gurría showcases why mezcal must be preserved. Free, 6:30-8:30pm, Mexican Cultural Institute-San Antonio, 600 Hemisfair Plaza Way, (210) 227-0123, facebook.com/icminfo.

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 43

CULTURE

tickets

L O C A L C U LT U R E T I C K E T S . C O M

7210 BLANCO RD | 210.314.4194

APRIL 28 • PARKER MCCOLLUM

TEXAS SALSA FEST SAT, MAY 27 | 12PM HEMISFAIR PARK

APRIL 29 • WAYNE “THE TRAIN” HANCOCK + TWO TONS OF STEEL

UNITED WE BRUNCH

SATURDAY, JUNE 10 | NOON - 3 PM

JACK GUENTHER PAVILION AT BRISCOE WESTERN ART MUSEUM

MAY 12 • AARON LEWIS

COCKTAIL: THE EVENT 2017 FRI, JUL 28 | 9PM THE DOSEUM

MAY 13 • TURNPIKE TROUBADOURS

to get y b e m Co n ery ow v r u o y ta ius Fies r i S b u Cl medal!

CLUB SiRIUS

AUGUST 25, 2017

WHISKEY BUSINESS SATURDAY, AUGUST 27 | 8 PM WITTE MUSEUM

SELL YOUR EVENT TICKETS

ON LOCALCULTURETICKETS.COM and get FREE PROMOTION in the CURRENT CALL 210-388-0606 FOR MORE INFO 44

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

3

$

JAGER & FIREBALL

ALL DAY EVERYDAY

FEATURING DJ SLIC RIC & DJ NAAWZMIXING THE LATEST MUSIC AND VIDEOS ON 5 HD SCREENS

MUSIC

COURTESY OF SONY MUSIC ENTERTAINMENT INC.

SIESTA FIESTA Local favorites The Union Underground reunite for a nu-metal-filled Fiesta-week bash CHRIS CONDE COURTESY OF UNIVERSAL RECORDS

COURTESY OF RUTHLESS RECORDS

≥

During NIOSA in the late 2000s and early 2010s, did you ever, mid-way through your chicken on a stick and Budlight chaser, hear the sounds of rock music playing across the street? Perhaps you staggered from La Villita over to Hemisfair Park to find yourself at Siesta Fest, where bands like The Toadies or Korn rocked crowds late into the Fiesta evening.

Back for its eleventh year, Siesta Fest returns for their annual musical takeover of Fiesta with four days of rock, hip hop, nu-metal and classic rock – all during our citywide excuse-for-being-drunk-for-two-weeks-straight celebration of, well, San Antonio.

The event was started by Alamo City Music Hall owner Sylvia Fernandez and the late 210 Kapones owner Pete L. Gonzalez Jr., who was killed outside his club in 2015. “We were lucky to have him with us as long as we did,” Fernandez told the Current. “Keeping [Siesta Fest] going and bringing good music to this city ... is really what it’s all about.”

The fest was originally held at Hemisfair Park up until 2012, but in the last several years has jumped from The Lot over off of Commerce Street to Alamo City Music Hall, where it will be held again this year.

Headlining Day 2 of the fest is San Antonio’s own numetal band The Union Underground, who through the late ‘90s and early 2000s rose to fame with the release

of their debut record ...An Education In Rebellion through Columbia Records.

The band was started by singer/guitarist Bryan Scott and guitarist Patrick Kennison, who met in junior high in San Antonio. After high school, the two started a recording studio where they released a self-titled EP, which garnered the attention of Sony Columbia’s subsidiary rock-focused label Portrait. After rounding out the band’s lineup with the addition of drummer Josh Memolo and bassist John Moyer, The Union Underground eventually released their debut album ...An Education In Rebellion, an 11 track grooveheavy nu-metal record in the vein of bands like Korn and Godsmack. The record grabbed the attention of Marilyn Manson, who picked them for his opening act in the fall of 2000. The following year the guys secured a slot for the Ozzfest tour.

In 2002, the band released a live record, their last before parting ways to focus on other projects.

And now, almost 15 years since their last show, The Union Underground have re-united with a few new members, are recording a new EP and have tour dates set for June and July.

With a new lineup, new music and a tour on the horizon, the future looks bright for the band and if you’re curious to hear what the guys have been up to lately, you won’t want to miss their performance at this year’s Siesta Fest.

But The Union Underground is just one of the many bands featured in the four-day lineup at Siesta Fest: Bone Thugs N Harmony

Stabbing Westward

Chamillionaire

The Hunger

Z-Ro

My Madness Refugee

Slim Thug

Rik Emmett

Boome And The Skywalkers

One - The Only Tribute to Metallica

Jay Green & Arjel Blanc

Lil Timmy and the Outlaws

Minuh

S.A. Territories

A-Wall

Jessikill

The Union Underground

Citizen Cope

Wednesday, April 26 - Saturday, April 29, $22-$200, tickets are on sale now at all H-E-B locations, ticketfly.com, Flip Side Record Parlor and Blackfly Metamorphosis. Visit siestafest.com for details. sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 45

PRESENTS

THE APP IS BACK!!

FINAL FRIDAY’S

HAPPY HOUR HOSTED BY: DJ

Mighty Iris

FRIDAY, APRIL 28TH 6PM-8PM

DRINK SPECIALS FREE PIZZA PATRON EVENT PRIZES INCLUDE:

DEFTONES

JUNE 28 AUSTIN AMPHITHEATER

INCUBUS & JIMMY EAT WORLD

AUGUST 5 AUSTIN 360 AMPHITHEATER

AND OTHER PRIZES

210.685.1579 126 W RECTOR, SAN ANTONIO, TX 78216 GO TO SLACKERSSA.COM FOR THE LATEST UPDATES 46

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

Open 3p-2a Everyday • Happy Hour 3-7pm Daily

MONDAYS: $5 COMBOS TUESDAYS: SHOT SPECIALS ALL DAY: $2.75 WELLS • $2 ZIEGENBOCK DRAFT “RIVER RAT SPECIAL” ALWAYS!

PSYCHIC HAPPY HOUR EVERY TUESDAY • FROM 6:30 - 8:30PM DJ and No Cover Saturday Nights E. Houston St.

N. Presa St.

TICKETS TO

College St.

RIVERTINI AWARD WINNER 600 N. Presa St. Inside the Maverick Building 210.267.9885 THELOCALBARSA.COM LIKE US ON FB: THELOCALBARSA

MP

A PERFECT CIRCLE

TIM CADIENTE

MUSIC PICKS

MUSIC

COURT ESY OF STRANGE MUSIC, INC.

THU

Nu-metal prog rockers A Perfect Circle are back on the road and have announced a new record that’s supposedly due out sometime this year. The last song they released was “By and Down” back in 2013, but it’s been about 13 years since they’ve released a full album, even longer for an album that wasn’t full of cover songs. But apparently this newest venture has been in the works for years. Founding member and lead guitarist Billy Howerdel was actually a guitar tech for several bands, including Tool, which is how he got linked up with singer Maynard James Keenan and eventually started A Perfect Circle. In a recent interview with the Salt Lake Tribune, Howerdel said he’s been sending music to Keenan for years. Go figure Keenan’s busy – in addition to his roles in A Perfect Circle and Tool, he’s also got his own side project Puscifer, a winery, and a family to attend to. Basically: touring is kind of a rare occasion. Touring and the possibility of hearing new tracks? That, my dears, could make this a special show for longtime APC and Maynard fans. With Prayers, from $37.50, Freeman Coliseum, 3201 E. Houston St. – Chris Conde WED

east coast, west coast, and the south all have their distinctive sounds.

TECH N9NE InFromhip-hop, the east coast’s complex lyricism, to the South’s slowed-down chopped-

LAUREN STELLING

and-screwed style, each area has a separate identity and contribution to the genre. So what did the Midwest bring to the table? Hip hop heads will argue it’s the rapid fire “chopper” style of Cleveland’s Bone Thugs N Harmony or Chicago’s Twista. Include on that list Kansas City’s Tech N9ne, who, since the early ‘90s, has been delivering a healthy dose of machine gun fire verses. Jumping to several record companies before starting his own label, Strange Music, in 1999, Tech N9ne, born Aaron Dontez Yates, has sort of assumed the role of black sheep of the hip-hop world. His lyrics are no-holds-barred, and he’s even brought on rock vocalists to collaborate, like Korn’s Jonathan Davis, who was featured on last year’s “Starting To Turn”. With 13 albums set to drop through his label this year as well as a huge tour with label kin Krizz Kaliko, Brotha Lynch Hung, Ces Cru and Stevie Stone, Yates’ 2017 is gearing up to be a busy one as he continues to lead the pack in the world of strange hip-hop. 8pm, $33.50-$46, Aztec Theatre, 104 N. St. Mary’s St. – CC

I cannot stress to you how amazing Seattle’s The Dip is. If typing in all caps wasn’t the worst thing ever, I would do it just so you could realize (or just imagine me holding a Dip album to the sky screaming, “Yass bitch!”). If you listen to this 7-piece vintage-sounding soul group, you’ll probably have a similar reaction. At the very least, you’ll start tapping your foot with a smile as singer/guitarist Tom Eddy’s breathy soul vocals lull you to the dance floor to shake that groove thang. Eddy definitely gets out of the way long enough to let the music breathe and fill up a room. Backed by a horn section called The Honeynutt Horns, the gang covers a range of sounds from high energy, bass-forward funk to casual stroll-through-King-William jazz inspired soul. They’re good. Really, really good. And if you’re looking to watch a band that knows how to simultaneously display remarkable musicianship and, you know, get down, this a show you won’t want to miss. With The Foreign Arm, Alamo City Soul Club, Friends of Sound Records, 9pm, $5, Limelight, 2718 N. St. Mary’s St. – CC THU

THE DIP

ATLAS GENIUS If folk-tinged, indie electro-pop is your bag—or if you just enjoy melodramatic performances by should-be pop stars of the moment— then you’ll want to catch the rambunctious and talented Aussie outfit Atlas Genius in action. Helmed by brothers Keith and Michael Jeffery, the (I’d say underrated) band’s songs are catchy as hell and its performances are known to be full of surprises and gusto, kinetic affairs that carry its songs to new proportions, THU

in all their relatable and anthemic-yet-saccharine glory. Atlas Genius, formed in 2009, has released two albums: 2013’s When It Was Now and 2015’s Inanimate Objects, both of which were fairly successful in terms of college/alternative radio airplay and generating a buzz.

That buzz, as we await the band’s third album, brings them (and perhaps you too) to the Tiger this week. $18.00, 8:00pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N St Mary’s St, papertigersa. com. — James Courtney

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 47

Y

MUSIC

TRAVIS SHINN

PAT BENATAR The 1980s were a spectacular time for the music industry. Technical innovations were introduced which greatly impacted the sound, deliverance and genres of music. The synthesizer generated entirely new subgenres and altered existing ones forever. The advent of MTV caused a spike in music video production. Among the icons who arose was one fearless female with a trained mezzo-soprano voice who cultivated a tremendous following of loyal rock-and-roll fans. Pat Benatar came to true celebrity in the early ‘80s, with beautiful ballads and rebellious rock hits like “We Belong”, “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” and “Invincible”. Her legendary vocals demanded equality in a genre dominated by men, empowering audiences around the globe – especially young women. With a reputation that includes four consecutive Grammy awards (and nine nominations) in the “Best Female Rock Performance” category, the rebel (with a cause) ingrained herself in rock-androll history. Pat Benatar, along with her husband and long-time musical partner Neil Giraldo, tours annually every summer. As a musician, producer and writer, Giraldo has an equally impeccable reputation in the music industry with a vast catalogue of solo hits and collabs. Together, they took the rock scene by force and even became the first female and first guitarist to be featured on MTV. After three decades, the celebrity couple is still selling out auditoriums around the world. 8pm, $35-$100, Tobin Center For The Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Cir. – Kimberly Rivera

Experimental music, in all of its various forms, is an acquired taste to be sure. Some come by their love for the avant-garde in music through theoretical concerns and in-depth study/practice. Others learn to love experimental music by tuning their ears to the weird and boundary-pushing, wherever they find it. Whichever of these categories you might fall into, or if you’re still waiting to be seduced by the mindexpanding capabilities of outre aural stimulation, Ventura’s “Night of Contemporary Composition” is a can’t miss show. The all ages event will feature performances by the Dane Rousay/ Cameron Taylor Duo (free jazz/improv featuring unconventional implements), Lisa Cameron (experimental composer/ percussionist from ATX), the Jacob Bissell/Daniel Miller Duo (performing their percussion and electric guitar piece “Statement”), and Joseph Erik Montano (of local experimental noise/pop group The Freebiez fame). 8pm-midnight, $5-$7, Ventura, 1011 Avenue B, (210) 802-6940. — JC SAT

48

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

ZL

ET MT A DA

NIGHT OF CONTEMPORARY COMPOSITION

O

FRI

FF

SINKANE Blending a mix of krautrock (Kraftwork, Tangerine Dream) with free jazz, shoegaze, R&B and prog rock, Sinkane (born Ahmed Gallab) writes some seriously psychedelic music without necessarily falling into the psyche-rock category.

The tracks are almost always bass and drum heavy as Gallab’s light and airy vocal melodies drift over the beat.

It’s a juxtaposition that might even remind you of Sade, just newer and a bit more electronic. Born to English college professors in Sudan, Gallab moved to the U.S. when he was five and eventually worked as a session musician for artists and bands including Caribou, of Montreal, and Yeasayer (to be honest, the first couple Sinkane records sound like they could’ve been Yeasayer albums – not necessarily a bad thing). On top of fronting Sinkane, Gallab also plays in a super group called Atomic Bomb!, which plays the songs of Nigerian funk musician William Onyeabor. The core group features members of Hot Chip, LCD Soundsystem, Beastie Boys, and Blur. On tour in support of the new album Life & Livin’ It, Sinkane continues to be one of those artists bridging pop and the fringes of experimental music. 8pm, $12, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St. SAT

TITANIUM 4000, X AGAIN, BLACK PANTHER, MASTER ZONE, EXTEN ZONE, EXTREME DIAMOND, EXTRA ZONE, RHINO V5, RHINO X, MAX LOAD, MAX HARD, MAX STAMINA, RHINO BIG HORN, PURE, RED ZONE 3000, RHINO 7 (5000), RHINO BLACK 3K, POWER ZONE 3000, FUEL UP, FORBIDDEN TIGER, FIFTY SHADES, TRIPLE XXX, EREKT FOR WOMAN: KANGROO, SPARXXX, GEISHA

| 8373 CULEBRA STE. 103 • 210.521.4555 1639 BABCOCK RD. • 210.474.6005

9405 IH-35 @ THOUSAND OAKS | 657-9999 • 11827 HWY 281 N @ NAKOMA | 404-0011 • OPEN DAILY: 7AM - 2AM sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 49

MUSIC

MUSIC CALENDAR WEDNESDAY, APRIL 26 The Georges Local act The Georges perform rockabilly. Free. Gruene Hall, 6-10pm Jason Eady Jason Eady, country singer and guitarist, performs. $10-$40. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm A Night in Old Jazz, Texas Fiesta celebration featuring performance by Mariachi Las Coronelas. $20. Jazz, TX, 8:30-11:30pm Paul Anka The Canadian-born singer and songwriter’s catalog has penned memorable songs such as Tom Jones’ “She’s a Lady,” and English lyrics to Frank Sinatra’s “My Way.” $46.50-$125. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 7:30pm Swmrs, White Reaper Punk band from Oakland, SWMRS, is joined by White Reaper, a garagepunk band from Louisville, Kentucky, and PARENTZ, a Bay area electropop act. $12-$14.

The Korova, 7pm THURSDAY, APRIL 27 Adam Torres, DT Buffkin Folk singer/ songwriter Adam Torres is joined by local “honky-tonk ‘n roll” artist DT Buffkin. $5-$8.

502 Bar, 9pm Atlas Genius Australian alt-rock band, Atlas Genius, performs at Paper Tiger. $18. Paper Tiger, 7pm Chris Knight Chris Knight is a singersongwriter from Kentucky. $15-$70. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm

Fiesta Jazz Festival Featuring over 500 middle school, high school and college jazz student performers from across the state. Free. St. Mary’s University, 1-10pm Gabe Russell Benefit Show Ohm-I (Brooklyn), Trainwrecked (SA), Galaxy Girl Paida, and others come together for a benefit show for Gabe Russell, an 18-year- old resident with Chiari Malformations, Complex Epilepsy, Lupus, and Addisons Disease in ICU. $5.

Fitzgerald’s Bar & Live Music, 7pm Junior Brown Alt-country artist Junior Brown performs at Gruene Hall. $20. Gruene Hall, 8pm Parker McCollum Americana singer/ songwriter based out of Austin, Parker McCollum, performs at Floore’s. $10-$12.

John T Floore’s Country Store, 9pm Saints Analogue Rock band from Wimberley, TX, Saints Analogue, performs at Amp Room. Free. The Amp Room, 9pm Twin Peaks Twin Peaks, indie-rock band from Chicago, is joined by Chrome Pony and Post Animal. $15. Paper Tiger, 8pm Xavier Wulf Xavier Wulf is a rapper/songwriter from East Memphis, Tennessee. Joined by Idontknowjeffrey and Gnealz. $20-$30. The Korova, 8pm SATURDAY, APRIL 29

The Dip The Dip is a funk/pop band from Seattle. $5. Limelight, 9pm

April Hall April Hall, singer/songwriter from Austin, plays at The Cove. The Cove, 6:308:30pm

Jay Wimberley Rock/soul act Jay Wimberley performs every Thursday at Phoenix Saloon.

Free. The Phoenix Saloon, 8pm

Chris Knight, Kody West Chris Knight, singer/ songwriter from Kentucky, is joined by Kody West. $20-$25. Luckenbach Dance Hall, 8pm

Jeff Lofton’ 1950s Miles Davis Tribute Featuring Davis’ compositions and interpretations made famous by the first Miles Davis Quintet, and includes excerpts from “Kind of Blue.” $35-45. Stateside Theater at the Paramount, 8-10pm Joe Ely Band Joe Ely, of Grammy Award winning band Los Super Seven, performs with his band at Gruene Hall. $20. Gruene Hall, 9pm LANY LANY, LA-based alt-rock trio, is joined by Machineheart. Sold Out. Paper Tiger, 8pm Leopold and His Fiction Austin-based folkrock act Leopold & His Fiction is joined by Wild Adriatic. $8-$12. 502 Bar, 9pm Magical Spacecat Magical Spacecat, “cosmic indie pop” act from Austin, is joined by local acts Fader Friend and Jejune Stars. $5.

Imagine Books and Records, 8-11pm

210 Blues Band R&B sounds of 210 Blues Band every Thursday & Sunday. Free. SoHo Wine & Martini Bar, 10pm Festival de Cascarones Performances by The Last Bandoleros, Girl in a Coma, and more. Free. Texas A&M University-San Antonio, 1-8 p.m.

Fiesta Blues Heritage Series Featuring Texas blues bands The Texas Horns and The Peterson Brothers. $15-$50. Sam’s Burger Joint, 1pm Jeff Plankenhorn Band Soul/rock act from Austin, Jeff Plankenhorn Band, is joined

by Malford Milligan and Cari Hutson. Free.

Gruene Hall, 5-9pm Slim Bawb Cajun/folk artist Slim Bawb performs at Gruene Hall. Free. Gruene Hall, 12:30-4:30pm Thomas Michael Riley Texas Music Awardwinning country artist Thomas Michael Riley performs at Luckenbach. Free. Luckenbach Dance Hall, 1pm

Never Buried, Anonymous Henchmen Never Buried, heavy metal band from McAllen, is joined by Anonymous Henchmen, Sift Through the Ashes, and Deathdodger. $5.

Zombies, 9:30pm

Meat and Metal Mondays Zombies Bar hosts a metal night while serving meat and drink specials. Free. Zombies, 5pm

MONDAY, MAY 1

The Strayhearts The Strayhearts, local acoustic Americana band, perform live at Luckenbach.

Free. Luckenbach Dance Hall, 1pm

Monday Evening Picker Circle with Jimmy Saurage Unplugged, acoustic session with Jimmy Saurage. Free. Luckenbach Dance Hall, 5pm

Texas T & the Shine Runners Country/rock act Texas T & the Shine Runners perform at Phoenix Saloon. Free. The Phoenix Saloon, 9pm

Swing Nite with the Ortega Jazz Band The Ortega Jazz Quartet plays swing night at Sam’s Burger Joint. $9-$10. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8:30pm

Tech N9ne Rapper and producer Tech N9ne is joined by Brotha Lynch Hung, Krizz Kaliko and more. $25-$35. Aztec Theatre, 8pm

Electro Fiesta Electro Fiesta is EDM dance music with Shawn Jackson, Swerve, Derrick Rage and more. Free. The Amp Room, 8pm

Tera Ferna Local “rock and soul” act Tera Ferna performs a patio session at Ventura. Joined

by Sioux & Fox. $5-$8. Ventura, 8-11pm

Fiesta Jazz Festival Featuring over 500 middle school, high school and college jazz student performers from across the state. Free. St. Mary’s University, 8 a.m.-6 p.m.

Wayne “The Train” Hancock Country musician Wayne “The Train” Hancock is joined by Two Tons of Steel. $15-$20. John T Floore’s Country Store, 8pm

Bonnie & the Bootleggers Bonnie & the Bootleggers performs a mix of rock, disco and swing. Free. The Phoenix Saloon, 9pm

Flat Top Jones Country artist Flat Top Jones performs at Gruene Hall. Free. Gruene Hall, 1-5pm

Brandy Clark and Charlie Worsham Grammy Award winner Brandy Clark is joined by Charlie Worsham in support of his upcoming sophomore album, Beginning of Things. $20-$80. Sam’s Burger Joint, 9pm

Jason Kane & the Jive CD Release Party Local “boogie rock” act Jason Kane & the Jive perform in support of their CD release.

Joined by The Heroine, Muvva Erff, and more. $5-$8. Fitzgerald’s Bar & Live Music, 7pm

The Weeners Members of Bright Like The Sun, The Saarinens and Islands & Tigers will be performing a career-spanning Ween tribute set. Opening will be Jason Trevino. $5-$8.

Limelight, 9pm

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

SUNDAY, APRIL 30

The Mavericks The Mavericks, who combine country, Latin rockabilly influences in their music, are joined by Los Lonely Boys and The Last Bandoleros. $32.33-$1,019.86.

Whitewater Amphitheater, 7pm

Violent Revenge, Solitary Runaway Local altrock and metal bands Finding September, The Recasts, Violent Revenge, Universal Monster and Solitary Runaway. $5-$8.

Bond’s 007 Rock Bar, 8pm

FRIDAY, APRIL 28

50

Broken Soul, Mushroom Honey Rock band Broken Soul is joined by Mushroom Honey and Septiva. $5. Zombies, 9:30pm

Whiskey Myers Southern rock/country band Whiskey Myers performs at the Aztec. $13.

Aztec Theatre, 8pm

TUESDAY, MAY 2 Dubbest, Ras G San Diego based reggae act Dubbest is joined by DJ Ras G, spinning all vinyl. Free. The Mix, 10pm Jazz on the Rocks Live jazz and happy hour specials. Free. St. Anthony Hotel, 5-7pm The Lineup Limelight hosts the Lineup, a Tuesday night dance party featuring DJ Free Verse. Limelight, 9pm NE-HI, Tamarron NE-HI, a four piece rock band from Chicago, is joined by Austin band Tamarron. $4-$7. Limelight, 9pm Samantha Fish Blues singer/sonwriter and guitarist Samantha Fish performs in support of her latest album release, “Chills & Fever.” $12-$70. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm

Playmates or soul mates, you’ll find them on MegaMates Always FREE to listen and reply to ads!

San Antonio:

(210) 320-5825 www.megamates.com 18+

Playmates or soul mates, you’ll find them on MegaMates

The hottest place to meet Latinos!

Try FREE: 210-447-1103 More Local Numbers: 1-855-831-1111

fonochatlatino.com 18+

Always FREE to listen and reply to ads!

Open desires...

Hidden identities...

Try FREE Now: 210-933-1106 More Local Numbers: 1-800-700-6666

redhotdateline.com 18+

FREE TRIAL

Discreet Chat Guy to Guy

210.320.6103

REAL PEOPLE, REAL DESIRE, REAL FUN.

San Antonio:

(210) 320-5877

www.megamates.com 18+

Try FREE: 210-933-1103 More Local Numbers: 1-800-926-6000

Ahora español Livelinks.com 18+

Meet sexy new friends

FREE TRIAL

210-933-1113

Recruiting for promo team!

PHOTOGRAPHERS |STREET TEAM | BRAND AMBASSADORS

SEND RESUME TO SAMARKETING@SACURRENT.COM

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 51

ETC.

Management Analyst (San Antonio, TX) Bach’s Deg in Mgmt, Business Admin, or closely related. Foreign deg equi acceptable. At least 5 yrs of exp in the job offered or in sr operations mgmt for a U.S. pizza franchise incl at least 5 yrs of exp of multi-unit P&L accountability & dvlpg above store leaders from GM base. Send resume to South Texas Pizza Inc. dba Domino’s. Kris Browstone, Dir. of Human Relations

RESTLESS

PHOTO.SACURRENT.COM

CHECK OUT FRESH DAILY CONTENT AT

sacurrent.com

YOUR EVENT THOUGH OUR LENS

NOW HIRING

HOSPITALITY PROFESSIONALS Servers | Bartenders | Cooks Dishwashers | Food Service Workers and MORE! 210.853.0233 | www.PartyStaff.com

52

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

SAVAGE LOVE

by Dan Savage

> My boyfriend wants to visit a private gay sex dungeon in Europe this summer but we want to play only with each other. Any tips on getting to play in an actual dungeon without having to put out for the guy whose dungeon it is?

Requests A Curious Kinkster Put Berlin on your itinerary, RACK, google “SM Apartments” or “Hoist Basements,” break out your credit card, splurge, and send pics. > I’m a straight married male.

My wife has a very close male friend who happens to be in a poly marriage. Recently, my wife said she would like us to be able to date others, have sex, romance, etc., but still remain a married couple.

She specifically wants to date her friend. I am struggling. I am not closed off to having a conversation about nonmonogamy, but I struggle with the thought of her having a boyfriend. I want to be able to give this to her, but I feel like my mind and body are not letting me. Any advice is so much appreciated.

Help Understanding Spouse’s Blunt And New Demand “Introducing nonmonogamy into an existing monogamous relationship can be tough, especially when it wasn’t your idea,” said Cunning Minx, host of the Polyamory Weekly podcast, who has been providing poly news, advice, and insights to the masses since 2005 at polyweekly.com. “It’s even more stressful when there is a potential partner waiting

in the wings! Yikes!”

While Minx is a poly activist and advocate, HUSBAND, she thinks both parties need to be on the same page before going poly. And before you take that step — if you take that step — Minx thinks you need to ask yourself some questions. “HUSBAND should do a fear inventory,” said Minx. “What is he afraid of? What would it mean to him if his wife had a boyfriend? What if she wanted to love a woman — does the penis make a difference? If so, why? Then he should sit with his wife and take stock of the health of their current relationship.”

You can say no to opening up your marriage, HUSBAND, but your wife may decide she wants out of the marriage if no is the answer — basically, this is a circumstance where one of you is going to have to pay a pretty steep price of admission. Either you’ll have to accept polyamory, or your wife will have to drop it. There isn’t really a middle ground here — or is there?

“It’s perfectly acceptable for HUSBAND to self-identify as monogamous while his wife practices polyamory,” said Minx. “It’s a difficult path, and will require a high level of internal security and self-awareness on his part, but ultimately your self-identity is your own decision.”

On the Lovecast, a deep dive into the world of cuckolding: savagelovecast.com. mail@savagelove.net @fakedansavage on Twitter ITMFA.org

ETC.

JONESIN’ CROSSWORD by Matt Jones

Answer on page 27

NOW HIRING FOR THE FOLLOWING POSITIONS:

• Dialysis Technicians (CHT or CCHT certified) • Medical Biller/Coder.

Please email resume to dialysisjob2017@gmail.com or fax to 210-692-0187

“Hm...” — I think it’s stuck in the middle.

ACROSS

1 “Listen up,” long ago 5 Allude (to) 10 1/8 of a fluid ounce 14 Perennial succulent 15 “I’d Be Surprisingly Good For You” musical 16 Certain mortgage, informally 17 Extinct New Zealand birds 18 Current host of “Late Night” 20 Far from optimal 22 Basic PC environment 23 Like lycanthropes 24 JetÈ, for one 26 Grand Coulee or Aswan, e.g.

28 “Kilroy Was Here” rock group 30 Anthony of the Red Hot Chili Peppers 34 Go off to get hitched 36 Mr. Burns’s word 38 This and that 39 Ceilings, informally 40 Past time 41 Emo band behind 2003’s “The Saddest Song” 43 “Ad ___ per aspera” 44 They may use tomatoes or mangoes 45 “Am ___ Only One” (Dierks

Bentley song) 47 Jan. 1, e.g.

48 Dwarf planet that dwarfs Pluto 50 ___ ipsum (faux-Latin phrase used as placeholder text) 52 Longtime “Saturday Night Live” announcer Don 55 Epiphany 59 “Way to botch that one” 61 Elevator innovator Elisha 62 In ___ (properly placed) 63 “___, With Love” (Lulu hit sung as an Obama sendoff on “SNL”) 64 Golden goose finder 65 Trial run 66 Enclosures to eds.

67 Sorts

DOWN

1 “Mad Men” star Jon 2 1966 N.L. batting champ Matty 3 Trap on the fl oor, slangily 4 “Tik Tok” singer 5 Vacation spot 6 Annually 7 Needs no tailoring 8 “I Love Lucy” neighbor 9 Zodiac creature

10 Times to use irrigation 11 Sax player’s item 12 “The Mod Squad” coif 13 Battleship call 19 It may be sent in a blast 21 One way to crack 25 ___ out a living (just gets by) 26 IOUs 27 Hawaii hello 29 II to the V power 31 Genre for Cannibal Corpse or Morbid Angel 32 Start 33 Great value 35 Ended gradually 37 “Oh, well!”

39 Actor Oka of “Heroes” 42 Deck for a fortuneteller 43 Prefi x with space or plane 46 They clear the bases 49 Island with earth ovens called ‘umus 51 Eggplant, e.g.

52 Sound from an exam cheater 53 Frenchman’s female friend 54 Decomposes 56 “Bonanza” son 57 Kroll of “Kroll Show” 58 Admonishing sounds 60 Abbr. after Shaker or Cleveland

sacurrent.com • April 26-May 2, 2017 • CURRENT 53

ETC.

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): I have misgivings when I witness bears riding bicycles or tigers dancing on their hind legs or Aries people wielding diplomatic phrases and making careful compromises at committee meetings.

While I am impressed by the disciplined expression of primal power, I worry for the soul of the creature that is behaving with such civilized restraint. So here’s my advice for you in the coming weeks: Take advantage of opportunities to make deals and forge win-win situations. But also keep a part of your fiery heart untamed. Don’t let people think they’ve got you all figured out.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): “One of the advantages of being disorderly,” said author A. A. Milne, “is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.” I wouldn’t normally offer this idea as advice to a methodical dynamo like you. But my interpretation of the astrological omens compels me to override my personal theories about what you need. I must suggest that you consider experimenting with jaunty, rambunctious behavior in the coming days, even if it generates some disorder. The potential reward? Exciting discoveries, of course.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): According to my reading of the astrological omens, it’s time for you to take a break from the magic you have been weaving since your birthday in 2016. That’s why I’m suggesting that you go on a brief sabbatical. Allow your deep mind to fully integrate the lessons you’ve been learning and the transformations you have undergone over the past eleven months. In a few weeks, you’ll be ready to resume where you left off. For now, though, you require breathing room. Your spiritual batteries need time to recharge. The hard work you’ve done should be balanced by an extended regimen of relaxed playtime.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): Apparently, a lot of kids in the UK don’t like to eat vegetables.

In response, food researchers in that country marketed a variety of exotic variations designed to appeal to their palate. The new dishes included chocolate-flavored carrots, pizza-flavored corn, and cheese-and-onionflavored cauliflower. I don’t recommend that you get quite so extreme in trying to broaden your own appeal, Cancerian. But see if you can at least reach out to your potential constituency with a new wrinkle or fresh twist. Be imaginative as you expand the range of what your colleagues and clientele have to choose from.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22): In speaking about the arduous quest to become one’s authentic self, writer Thomas Merton used the example of poets who aspire to be original but end up being imitative. “Many poets never succeed 54

CURRENT • April 26-May 2, 2017 • sacurrent.com

in being themselves,” he said. “They never get around to being the particular poet they are intended to be by God. They never become the person or artist who is called for by all of the circumstances of their individual lives. They waste their years in vain efforts to be some other poet. They wear out their minds and bodies in a hopeless endeavor to have somebody else’s experiences or write somebody else’s poems.” I happen to believe that this is a problem for nonpoets, as well. Many of us never succeed in becoming ourselves. Luckily for you, Leo, in the coming weeks and months you will have an unprecedented chance to become more of who you really are. To expedite the process, work on dissolving any attraction you might have to acting like someone other than yourself.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): On numerous occasions, French acrobat Charles Blondin walked across a tightrope that spanned the gorge near Niagara Falls. His cable was three and a quarter inches in diameter, 1,100 feet long, and 160 feet above the Niagara River. Once he made the entire crossing by doing back flips and somersaults. Another time he carried a small stove on his back, stopped midway to cook an omelet, and ate the meal before finishing. Now would be an excellent time for you to carry out your personal equivalent of his feats, Virgo. What daring actions have you never tried before even though you’ve been sufficiently trained or educated to perform them well?

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): Ready for some subterranean journeys? They may not involve literal explorations of deep caverns and ancient tunnels and underground streams.

You may not stumble upon lost treasure and forgotten artifacts and valuable ruins.

But then again, you might. At the very least, you will encounter metaphorical versions of some of the above. What mysteries would you love to solve? What secrets would be fun to uncover? What shadows would you be excited to illuminate?

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21): Why would you guzzle mind-clouding moonshine when you will eventually get a chance to sip a heartreviving tonic? Why spoil your appetite by loading up on non-nutritious hors d’oeuvres when a healthy feast will be available sooner than you imagine? I advise you to suppress your compulsion for immediate gratification.

It may seem impossible for you to summon such heroic patience, but I know you can.

And in the long run, you’ll be happy if you do.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21): “You’ll always be my favorite what-if.” Many years ago, I heard that phrase whispered in my ear. It came from the mouth of a wonderful-

but-impossible woman. We had just decided that it was not a good plan, as we had previously fantasized, to run away and get married at Angkor Wat in Cambodia and then spend the next decade being tour guides who led travelers on exotic getaways to the world’s sacred sites. “You’ll always be my favorite what-if” was a poignant but liberating moment. It allowed us to move on with our lives and pursue other dreams that were more realistic and productive. I invite you to consider triggering a liberation like that sometime soon.

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19): I’d love to see you increase the number of people, places, and experiences you love, as well as the wise intensity with which you love them.

From an astrological perspective, now is an excellent time to upgrade your appreciation and adoration for the whole world and everything in it. To get you in the mood, I’ll call your attention to some unfamiliar forms of ardor you may want to pursue: eraunophilia, an attraction to thunder and lightning; cymophilia, a fascination with waves and waviness; chorophilia, a passion for dancing; asymmetrophilia, a zeal for asymmetrical things; sapiophilia, an erotic enchantment with intelligence.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18): You could go online and buy an antique Gothic throne

or a psychedelic hippie couch to spruce up your living room. For your bathroom, you could get a Japanese “wonder toilet,” complete with a heated seat, automated bidet, and white noise generator. Here’s another good idea: You could build a sacred crazy altar in your bedroom where you will conduct rituals of playful liberation. Or how about this? Acquire a kit that enables you to create spontaneous poetry on your refrigerator door using tiny magnets with evocative words written on them. Can you think of other ideas to revitalize your home environment? It’s high time you did so.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20): Among America’s 50 states, Texas has the third-highest rate of teenage pregnancies. Uncoincidentally, sex education in Texas is steeped in ignorance.

Most of its high schools offer no teaching about contraception other than to advise students to avoid sex. In the coming weeks, Pisces, you can’t afford to be as deprived of the truth as those kids. Even more than usual, you need accurate information that’s tailored to your precise needs, not fake news or ideological delusions or self-serving propaganda. Make sure you gather insight and wisdom from the very best sources. That’s how you’ll avoid behavior that’s irrelevant to your life goals. That’s how you’ll attract experiences that serve your highest good.

THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow

Fiesta Parties NIGHTLY! Friday April 28 4:00-9:00

DJ ROLAND BELMARES FRIDAY, APRIL 28

DJ TONY MORAN SATURDAY, APRIL 29

on Saturday, April 29

1400-1500 Block of North Main