Neighborhood Etiquette-

Are you friends or foes?

Neighborhood Etiquette-Being Joy-full Neighbors by Susan

Vernick

Neighbor relationships are complex, plain, and simple. Here are Five Simple Etiquette Practices to Grow These Relationships:

Greetings-In the hustle and bustle of life, running errands, going to work, and taking the kids to practice, remember that simple, quick greetings go a long way in keeping the neighborhood a friendly one where we greet each other; wave and exchange simple pleasantries. A quick chat about the weather, sports teams, or family life is a wonderful way to stay connected. Also, making time for quality time together, whether a summer iced tea on a porch, a spring luncheon, or a holiday get-together, is lovely if possible

Resolving Tension- If you find you have a problematic neighbor, remain cordial if possible and keep the peace (providing there are no safety issues) and wave when you can. Even sharing a dozen or two of your most prized cookies during the holiday season may melt the icy feelings that sometimes happen between neighbors. Remembering the Spanish Proverb lightheartedly, "The belly rules the mind." But should any tension exist, pray for your neighbor and that relationship, and never underestimate the power of a kind, loving gesture.

Helping- Whether a new baby, surgery, a simple repair, or difficult circumstances, step in with a "can I help anything text/gesture." When my husband was deployed for almost a year to the Mid-East, during the War on Terror, many neighbors helped with lawn care, running errands, and more. We now reciprocate those wonderfully kind gestures whenever we can. Of course, you will not get to everything, but doing something, goes a long way. And if you are on the receiving end, a simple thank you note (which I highly recommend) is, of course, a perfectly wonderful etiquette practice. At a minimum, a heartfelt "thank you" makes for a wonderfully kind exchange.

Sharing- Whether it be a surplus of vegetables, a terrific recipe, a discounted item at the local nursery, or a miter saw, share your surplus or great find tips! This is a great way, in a real, tangible way, to love others. Also, these small interactions may allow God to open the doors and lines of communication to share about your faith, especially if an already established relationship exists. Remembering this scripture, "Don't forget to do good and share what you have because God is pleased with these kinds of sacrifices." Hebrews 13:16

Being Courteous (Noise) - Whether it is noise levels such as barking dogs, graduation parties, or other gatherings, be mindful of your neighbors. Indeed, occasional large gatherings outside the normal noise levels are fine. And who doesn't love the sound of children playing but ask yourself, "Would (insert sound) bother me once or over and over again?" answering honestly is the best gauge to avoid noise pollution and possibly polluting the relationships around you; mindful always of Matthew7:12, "So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them" We are aiming to be a light to those around us.

Neighborhood Etiquette-Are you friends or foes?

Being Courteous (Space) - Nothing more notoriously introduces tension to neighbors than property lines and space intrusion. Living on a 1000-acre farm probably has its own set of challenges, but in suburbia and not-quite-suburbia, property lines are a lightning rod for tension and even argument producers. I had a wise pastor share a story about an argument with a neighbor because the neighbor was upset with him because he thought he was intruding on their property line. It escalated as the weeks passed, and the pastor never engaged in arguing; instead, they committed to praying about the situation. Shortly after that, the neighbor apologized and began building a relationship. Now, not every case ends with such a fairytale ending. But, my takeaway was not the ending but the praying and trusting in God. Is there any other better way to spearhead a difficult neighbor situation? Trusting that God shows you step by step when to speak and intervene and when to stay quiet. Not easy, for sure! But, knowing God's great care about these relationships must always remain at the forefront of our minds. Aiming to be a well-mannered neighbor should be a delight, not a burden.

Looking Out for Each Other. We live in tumultuous times, with covid, the economy, and more all having caused things to feel heavier. Look out for each other's homes, text each other if a package remains on the front porch and notify each other of anything questionable. Knowing you have each other's back is the most neighborly gesture that builds trust and is the best foundation for being a light to those around you.

So, embrace the journey of being neighborly, and be mindful of what a good, courteous neighbor is. Try to keep in the forefront of your mind this insightful quote, "All will concede that to have good neighbors, we must also be good neighbors. That applies in every field of human endeavor." -Harry S. Truman.