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The Epistle

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The Epistle Volume 36, Issue 4

Staff

February 2010

Going, going...changed?

by Micah McGuire “Oh, give me a couple of seconds. I’ll google it.” Helmsing, then involve the faculty and students. As far At this point, the speaker pulls out a cell phone and in as a time line, the project looks to be more in the long less than a minute, has that pesky definition. It’s the age term, about a two year process. For those of us who of information! We can find out anything use the fiction section on a consistent basis, don’t we need to know, from anywhere. If you worry, there are no plans to change that part of the can’t find it on the Internet, it probably library. doesn’t exist. We don’t realize the con “And what does this have to do with me?” More venience at our fingertips until a teacher than you might think. The library team is considerassigns a research paper and requests ing a board of students to voice their ideas about one book source. Research…from a the new SPS library. If you have ideas and want to book? As in I have to make the effort to be heard, this board would be the place to sound go to the library? Unfortunately, with off. Even if you just want to join to critique and the new age of information, this is the suggest additions to others’ thoughts, you should What’s the solution to the only time the library’s encyclopedias see join. But believe me, the ideas come quickly. In ten library problem? use, and it hasn’t gone unnoticed. minutes, The Epistle staff bounced around a variety But, if physical reference books are becomof ideas including a collaboration area in the bottom of ing obsolete, then what’s the point of the library? Our the library and a quiet area on the top floor or removing Information and Technology Coordinator, Mr. Wayne the computer area and blocking it off into a silent study Williams, calls this the “transition period” for the liroom or turning the library into a tutoring center. Personbrary. “The library is changing. It’s no longer the only ally, I like a combination of the ideas: reserve the top repository of knowledge because the information in our floor for tutoring, most of the bottom floor for collaborareference books is on the Internet,” he said. Then what tion and block off a section for a silent study room. But will it be? Right now, the project is in the early stages. it’s all a matter of opinion. If you want to get involved in Mr. Williams, Ms. Leslie Suffich, Mrs. Nola Powell, and the project, talk to Mrs. Powell. Tell her that you want to Mrs. Lisa Knezha have done the preliminary footwork read the research and put your two cents in. and hope to soon present the synopsis to Mr. Victor

Editor-in-Chief Lila Sefat Photo Editor Kirk Palmer Staff Reporters Dylan Gibson Micah McGuire Kyle Grace Mills Contributing Writers Curtis Bailey Ashley Balentine Natalie Donnell Bishop Mostellar

Journalism Adviser Dr. Laurie Shorter

Holy Sheikra! St. Paul’s Episcopal School 161 Dogwood Lane Mobile, AL 36608 Phone: (251) 342-6700 Fax: (251) 342-1844 Email: Lshorter@stpaulsmobile.net Website: www.stpaulsmobile.net

The Epistle is published by the Journalism students of St. Paul’s Episcopal School. The opinions and views expressed in this paper do not necessarily represent those of our administration, the adviser or all members of The Epistle staff.

Special thanks to the Halo Yearbook Staff for their photo contributions.

by Kyle Grace Mills As a new year began, so did a new adventure I suffered another serious heart injury when I glimpsed for the class of 2012. This whirlwind tour of Busch the Hogwarts Castle behind, alas, a very large wall. The Gardens, Universal Studios, Islands of Adventure, and Wizarding World, set to open in a couple of months, Sea World began in our own auditorium. Mr. McGehee, was shooting up right next to the Dueling Dragons. And looming ominously, warned us of the consequences that I cannot forget to mention the Hulk. Zero to eighty in a would take place if any of us [insert over-celebratory second. That’s all I have to say. Alabama fans here] act up. Our I now must mention the miserable event known parents would spend thousands of as Sea World. With temperatures dipping below dollars to get us back home just the forties and drizzling rain that froze us to the so that they could properly skin us bone, I don’t care how cute seals, otters, and penalive for being expelled. Oh, on a guins are. It just wasn’t worth it. light note, the trip would be really There are, of course, the nights to talk about as fun. well. Medieval Times stirred a mixture of emo After getting no sleep in the tions in me. There was disgust, horror, mild Sophomores Isabel Irvine and buses (Benadryl anyone?), we conhappiness that I could eat with my hands, and a Mary Ball served the last bits of our energy for strong sense of confusion as to where these people standing in line for the rides at Busch Gardens. There’s come from (their mother’s basement?). I guess I had the Montu, a personal favorite of mine, along with a se- always hoped that people who dress up like knights and ries of other swirly-hurley rides. Then, of course, there’s princesses, like monsters, didn’t really exist. Moving on the Sheikra, a roller coaster with a ninety degree drop to a more pleasant note, Disney Quest was five floors of from over seventy feet. Translation, suicide. You find every game from old-school Pac-man to Guitar Hero. yourself questioning your own sanity as you reach the The best night, appropriately the last night, was the Blue very top. Click and you’re suspended temporarily over Man Group. For over a decade these guys have been in your own death. Five seconds later you meet it, your the spotlight (remember that song I’m Blue?). With a fingers white from gripping your harness and your voice mixture of comedy, offbeat music, circus-like tricks, and already hoarse from screaming. A couple of flips later, unabashed staring, the Blue Man Group continued to you step off the ride. You then turn to your friend and surprise and, yes, slightly frighten us through the night. against all odds say, “That was awesome!” The trip was memorable to say the least. I don’t Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure think anyone can properly forget Sheikra’s drop or took place over the next two days. While Universal the Hulk’s speed. Or Alabama’s precious victory over held all the charm of a movie set, Islands had the kick Texas. Or the over the top celebration afterwards. We all of Busch Gardens. Universal had the better stores and took something unique away from the trip, whether it was equipped with more special effects (motion simula- was a picture of our friends’ painted faces, a Betty Boop tor = motion sickness). Universal even had the world’s keychain, postcard, and charm bracelet (I said I went largest Betty Boop collection and souvenir shop. After broke), or a memory of that time the Blue Man Group recovering from my heart attack, I paid tribute to this stared you awkwardly in the face. Bad sleep, great trip. glorious place by going broke. At Islands of Adventure,

Editorials (2-3) Spread (4-5) Features (6-7) Sports (8)


Editorials 2 Letter from the editor by Lila Sefat

Hello, hello. Wow. I can’t believe the time has finally come that I can call myself a second semester senior. With all the exciting things happening at once (Disney, Mardi Gras, graduation) it is extremely hard not to get distracted and blatantly show the symptoms of the notorious Senioritis. As a procrastinator, I will have to fight this battle over the next few weeks before graduation. One of my worst habits lately has been subconsciously checking Facebook while working on homework. The painful thought of temporarily deactivating my account during school always creeps in my mind (unfortunately, never actually happens). Well, I must say, it finally feels “right” to be a senior. With Valentine’s Day coming up this Sunday, our spread is based around the mushy holiday with cheesy Valentine’s messages from your fellow classmates. Also, thank you to all who contributed to the Haiti relief fund. Every contribution helps. At the same time, The

Epistle is not solely about covering the trivial matters of our popular teenage culture. It is, in fact, an opportunity for you to expand your mindsets and actually think about common views in a different way. We’ve included articles that may (if you’re brave) open your viewpoint on important issues in the world. Check out Dylan Gibson’s and Kyle Grace Mills’s article on President Obama’s one year term report. Also, the students of Current Issues have generously agreed to share their knowledge on previous lectures from the class. I talked with Mr. Wilson’s classes and was pleased that most of the students openly embraced the idea of the journalism collaboration which showed they truly enjoy what they are learning and are willing to pass on to others their understanding. Natalie Donnell and Bishop Mostellar’s article, “Net Neutrality,” delves into the issue on whether or not the government should block certain internet services. This is an interesting read so definitely check it out. Thank you so much for continuing to read our paper and if would ever like for a certain topic to be covered, please let your voice be heard and e-mail us on an article idea. Happy Valentine’s Day!

Lila Sefat

Obama report card by Dylan Gibson

It’s been one year, give or take some. Obama is president-- love it or hate it. So we’re offering up some commentary from everyone’s favorite dynamic duo of the fire-breathing conservative and the evil socialist scumbag on that one topic that, admit it, you wouldn’t think about were it not for us. How’s the newbie doing?

Economics

This particular piece of curriculum played a large part in Obama’s election to office, and not surprisingly, has fueled both his most fervent supporters and naysayers alike. For a reform-minded president, Obama has performed as one in his position should and best can. Not everyone agrees on whether or not these reforms are in the best interest of the country, including many in the House and Senate, which has ensured that legislation on the issue has been and will be some time in the making. Frankly, I am hesitant to take a particular side on this issue out of the sheer complexity of it. For every source you find that says one thing and supports it with a particular set of facts and statistics, there’s another source that says the exact opposite. Clearly, there are two stock markets in the United States that are in very different situations, neither of which I have heard of. The general consensus appears to be that we are recovering from the economic recession. The process appears to be slow but it is happening, and one can only hope that the sluggishness of it is an indicator that the mistakes that led to it won’t be made again.

Grade: B

Health Care

In the October issue of The Epistle, I did an article on this particular issue. All I can say is that healthcare is a much more complex and multifaceted issue than most people think. Talking heads on all ends of the political spectrum would love to convince the general public of one of these two probabilities: either A, health care reform will turn us into an evil socialist nation of freedom-haters who despise all that is dear to the capitalist spirit, or B, health care reform will make us into a magical land of milk and honey where everyone gets top-quality medical treatment whenever they need it and everything’s just hunky-dory for everybody. Sadly, we don’t live in a conditional reality of black and white (though it would seem that the political community hasn’t received the memo yet). In promoting health care reform, the simple goal is to create a more efficient system that will guarantee more people better treatment under the basic premise that access to medical care should be a right, not a privilege for those with the means to pay for it. Many people seem

quite convinced that this is a flawed view and that if you can’t afford treatment, you must be a hindrance to society and don’t deserve it. It’s generally not taken into consideration that not everyone can get a solid white-collar job and good health care just for being productive enough, sadly. Throwing back and forth generalizations about the character of lower-class Americans, overuse of the maxim “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it” and endless debate over whether it’s broken and excuses for not fixing it get us nowhere at all. As much as I’d love to just totally flunk the House and Senate, I’m not grading them. President Obama, so far as I can see, has taken the issue in stride and done what he can to advance the health care issue, and for that I give him a B.

Grade: B

Environment

John McCain and Barack Obama both made promises to further the plight of alternative energy and conservation during their respective campaigns, a prospect which at least showed that they both recognized it as a serious issue. Obama’s plan for creating a “green collar” job industry to aid economic growth and the expansion of a far-too-small alternative energy industry would be more than welcome right now looking at our unemployment rates. Sadly, it does not appear as though serious measures have yet been taken to call into play such a program. I’ve done my best not to throw myself among the disillusioned masses that suddenly lost all of their “Hope” and “Change” spirit because Obama did not make us into a nation of shiny, happy people who live on rainbows and have money orchards in our backyards almost overnight. However, I confess to feeling a little bit let down by this. Given the huge amounts of documentation on climate change, it’s a bit ridiculous to make it a political ploy. It would seem that the noted conservative and long-standing oil tycoon T. Boone Pickens is even supporting some sort of legislation for alternative energies and “green collar” jobs. (For financial reasons, I’m sure; I doubt he’s got any affinity for cute little baby polar bears.) In conclusion, though I think we’re on the right track and that this cannot and should not be an overnight process, I personally don’t think it’s happening at the rate it should.

Grade: C+

Diplomatic and Public Relations

I think that President Obama has done a good job in regards to diplomacy and public relations. Regardless of whether you saw him as a visionary or the antichrist manifest (neither of which are healthy attitudes towards a presidential candidate), one must admit that he did show some oratory prowess. Granted, with the aid of a prompter, but he’s avoided more in-speech screw-ups than a certain vice-presidential candidate (surprise, I’m actually not making a demeaning Sarah Palin joke here). (continued on p.3)


Obama continued from p.2

Obama has been praised quite heavily by our European neighbors, which doesn’t necessarily say much for him as a president as much as a figurehead, but it never hurts to get back into Europe’s good graces. Don’t get me wrong, I think that George Bush, my political opinions of him aside, was essentially a good guy. However, that good old American attitude of punching on the shoulder, playfully spanking and bearhugging a man who holds in the palm of his hand a pretty fair chunk of our oil consumption is not the way to go about making pals outside of the West. As for Obama’s handling of the situations in Iran and North Korea…Well, there really isn’t much to say. Aside from pretending they don’t exist or nuking the living daylights out of them (neither of which

Editorial 3

is particularly rational), one can only tread lightly diplomatically on their grounds and hope for the best. North Korea has of late expressed some interest in reconciliation following the rather disastrous six-party talks to try to get them to stop their production of nuclear technology, which is certainly hopeful. Well, hopeful until one takes into account that Kim Jong Il, much like his Iranian counterpart Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (why yes, I did have to copy and paste that) is something of a sociopath who probably harbors no sincere intentions of friendship towards anyone at all. On that note, best of luck, Mr. President.

Grade: A-

A second opinion by Kyle Grace Mills

Economics

I’m not an economics major, but I can imagEnvironment ine that if a country spends billions of dollars they Although Obama promised to take productive don’t have, then the economy won’t improve. After measures to ensure green jobs, he has come up with borrowing a little over a trillion dollars from China none. This is actually a lucky break for our economy and billion dollar bail outs for bankrupt corporations, because in Spain, the green capitol of the world, one Obama passed a billion dollar stimulus plan. While green job costs five hundred thousand Euros. That makes this cash flow reaches the unemployed, the impova green occupation expensive and hard to make. I doubt erished, and the people who don’t file tax returns, that Obama’s falling down on his promise because he’s the middle class gets taxed. Don’t get me wrong, trying to be thrifty. He’s probably just noticing the polls. there are people who deserve a break, but there are About half of America believes in Global Warming and Tea Party protest too many people who take advantage of our system. the other half thinks it’s a hoax. He’s telling one side that he’ll Obama’s borrowing, spending, borrowing again trend, isn’t going to do something and showing the other side that he isn’t in a hurry to do help our debt or our taxes. anything. He says he’s focusing on alternative energy sources and yet he doesn’t dare to push continued drilling Alaska for oil while we wait for a Grade: F scientific breakthrough. On the environment, Obama’s being a politician not a President. Health Care Grade: C+ The Health Care bill being passed around the Senate right now sounds like a deal too good to be true. Newsflash: It is. If you can ignore the fact that a successful country like Great Britain has gone bankrupt by Foreign Policy and Public Relations trying to embark on this Utopian road and that many respectable medi As the new President of the United States, Obama made the cal associations disregard it as a joke, then it almost sounds swell. Oh rounds to all the influential countries. And although I could disagree but then you remember, where’s all this money going to come from? with most of his political views, he is a classy guy. He charmed most Let’s assume you have health care and don’t wish to have a government countries with his wide smile and self-effacing manner. Go ahead; call run health care. You opt not to have it, only to discover that you’re still Obama a wimp for bowing to the Japanese Prime Minister. But he was going to pay for it. It’s government run, that means tax run. Your tax just being a respectful guest in a country he did not control. And considmoney. We’re already in an economic downturn, and we’re about to pay ering the fact that he appeared on television shows more than he did on for a billion dollar stimulus plan. The bills are building up and since the news channels proves that he doesn’t mind getting in front of a camera President has to visit China to see our money, I don’t see how focusing and reading a teleprompter. And his family? Cute as a button. on an improbable, expensive ideal will help our present situation. Grade: A

Grade: D

Demaryous Harvey: the champion

by Kyle Grace Mills When doctors in Mobile told Denise there was nothing they could do, she simply turned to Birmingham. Denise once told us that, “You can’t tell a mother there is nothing more you can do.” Birmingham gave her an answer she could accept. Demaryous Harvey recently turned nine. This summer he had his tenth brain surgery. But what makes Demaryous important isn’t brain cancer. It’s his inner light. His mother, Denise Harvey, shares this opinion, taking each day as a gift and a beautiful one at that. They hope for the best, prepare for the worst, and refuse to accept that there simply isn’t anything they can do. I first met Demaryous at Central Presbyterian Church, a little over a year ago. A woman at church Dylan Mills with was his neighbor and she wanted to introduce us. I Demaryous Harvey admit my first reaction was of pity. Poor kid, having to go through all that, I thought. I remember that I noticed how sweet a smile he had. It was friendly, kind of tired. He immediately took to my brother, Dylan. And vice versa. As our relationship with Demaryous progressed, I discovered that he wasn’t just a kid going through extraordinarily tough times. He was an extraordinary kid going through some tough times. As a fan of baseball, it was only natural that a kid like Demary-

ous, perfect age for a bat boy, should become St. Paul’s baseball team’s bat boy. He was met with compassion and respect by both the players and their parents. A.J. McCarron even compared scars with Demaryous in the dugout. He did his duty like a true champ, being bat boy for three games. For each of the games, his brother, Aaron, and sister, Anastasia, sat in the bleachers cheering him on or harassing my father. Out of all the good-looking baseball players, Demaryous was by far the cutest in his oversized helmet, dirty shirt, and good-humored smile. After the baseball season, my family continued to visit Demaryous, taking him on trips to the Blue Bunny Ice Cream Parlor with his siblings. There, he would talk about his favorite videogames, gross bathroom humor, and his family, his true passion. On a recent visit I watched him shower affection on his newest sister, Memoree. All of the Harvey children come by their affectionate nature naturally. We usually leave their house about twenty hugs richer. Demaryous battles demons that no average nine-year old can imagine. And yet, he accepts it courageously, knowing that he is lucky for everyday, good or bad. This story isn’t meant to evoke pity or sadness, but thankfulness that there are beautiful people like Demaryous out there. The Harveys don’t ask for your charity. They ask for your prayers and love. And after meeting the profound Demaryous Harvey, I’m confident that’s all he needs.


4 Spread Student look-alikes by Lila Sefat

It’s time to bring back the fabulous Epistle tradition of student look-a-likes. Stalking-- we’ve all been guilty of this, whether it’s on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, whatever. No one likes to admit it, but let’s forget about that and indulge our guilty pleasure. Enjoy.

Cam Williamson- Cillian Murphy

(actor from Red Eye) With those piercing arctic blue eyes and pale complexion, the resemblance between the two is undeniable.

Clint Innocenti- Alexander Raue The picture speaks for itself, really.

William Kneip- Polar bear cub

Okay, he may not look exactly like a polar bear cub. But you get what I mean by his cute innocence, right?

Bryson Webster- Seth Rogen

Not only is Bryson funny like Seth Rogen, but he’s also got the shag and glasses working for him.

Kevin Moore- Alex Rodriguez

Moore rocks the half smirk just like A-Rod... I guess.

Jordan Vallas- Hagrid

Vallas’s husky persona and dark features definitely give him the look of Hagrid. Add a burly beard and he’s ready to raise dragons.

Hunter Boykin- John Lennon

Hunter’s eccentric personality matches Lennon. Plus, the obvious round specs.

Sean Spake- Gary from Team

Beth Pickel- Abigail Breslin

With her big blue eyes and platinum blonde locks, Beth looks identical to Kit Kitteredge.

America What a cool cat.

Mad lib love letter by Dylan Gibson As February draws itself upon us, a certain holiday’s shadow looms ever closer. However, no sugar plums dance in the kids’ heads this time of year. The enchantment of Christmas is far gone. The folly of New Years’ has been avenged by that late morning waking realization on the dawn of this new decade that, why, yes; that teacher IS soul-less enough to give you homework over the break. Until July the 4th, you’ll not be seeing any more holidays joined in that holy union with the absence of schoolwork. But hey, it’s Valentines’ Day time, so who am I to be a humbug. Spread the love, right? And there’s no better way to finally fulfill that burning passion you’ve had for lordknows-how-long for that special someone than to do it in writing. Alas, we are not all wordsmiths. But do not fear, ye heartbroken and yearning masses, I went ahead and took the trouble out of it for you. Now, let the fun begin. Nouns: Adjectives: Verbs: Pronouns: Dearest ________, I have harbored feelings of ________ intense (n)_______ for

you as long as I can remember. Your beautiful (b)________ reminds me of (n)_________ under the setting sun as twilight (v)_______s. Simply (v)______ing of you is no longer enough, and I feel that I must fulfill my (n)________. Your (adj)________ face brings to my mind images of the (adj)_______est (n)_______ my eyes could ever hope to see. In writing this, I feel that I must confess feelings of great (n)_________; please do not be dismayed by it. Many a night I have thought to myself, “(pr)_______ is the only one who will ever make me complete, and (pr)___ _____ is my one and only (n)_____ ______.” I plead that you accept my (n)_______, and with it the passion I feel for you. I request your presence at (place)_______’s tomorrow night, for I have already made reservations. A (color)_______ (vehicle)_______ will pick you up at (place)______ at 6 pm. You will know that I have sent it, as the driver will have a (n)______ moustache, and will be wearing (color)________ (article of clothing/accessory)_________. I shall wear my best (article of clothing)__________ with a silk (article of clothing)__________ if you wish to dress accordingly. We shall have a(n) (adj)_________ time. I look forward to seeing your (adj)__________ (physical feature)_________ at 6pm tomorrow evening. With greatest (feeling)______ and sincerity. Yours truly, (Your name here)________________


Spread 5 Valentine’s messages Thank you to all who submitted valentines and donated to the Haiti relief fund. With your contributions, we raised $191. Thanks for sharing your heart with others!


6 Features This is war

by Micah McGuire For anyone who doesn’t know Thirty Seconds to Mars (AKA the slow, uncomplicated “100 Suns.” This song, along with “Vox Po30STM), they’re an alternative band known for their intense rock songs, puli,” “Alibi” and “Closer to the Edge,” is my least favorite song on the deep lyrics, incredibly long, award-winning music videos and an infaalbum. Yet, “Hurricane” made up for the shortcomings of “100 Suns” mous thirty million dollar lawsuit with Virgin and seems to be the future, more electronic style of Thirty Records. Jared Leto, the lead singer and an actor, Seconds to Mars. The album version is just Thirty Seconds is the best known member of the band. He has to Mars, but a quick youtube search for “Hurricane featuring called This is War a “concept album,” two words Kanye” will give you the collaboration with Kanye West. I that most bands wouldn’t touch with a mile long like both versions, even though the hardcore 30STM fans will pole. The album’s “concept” style stems from a scream “sellout” until their last breath because an alternative “summit” in which more than a hundred thouband partnered with a popular rapper. “Search and Destroy” is sand fans from all over the world sang, stomped the last highlight of the album for me, continuing in the same and clapped for the album recording. Was this quasi-techno vein of “Hurricane.” I have a personal vendetta necessarily a plus? To decide that, you’ll have against “L490” (and to this day, I don’t understand the name) to listen for yourself--but a little research before because I made the mistake of listening to it with headphones. purchasing wouldn’t hurt, right? A ringing noise makes up three-fourths of the song, and could Unlike previous albums, This is War be used as the human equivalent of a dog whistle if played Gregorian chant anyone? starts out rather eccentrically. ”Escape” begins with a loud enough. Gregorian chant, moves to the typical intense Thirty Seconds to Mars Overall, I would give the album a solid B. The brilliance of style and ends with fans singing “This is war!” For me, the start was bi- “Night of the Hunter,” “This is War,” “Hurricane” and “Search and zarre; nevertheless, with the powerful drum beat of “Night of the Hunt- Destroy” outweighs my dislike for the other songs on the album. So, er,” I was back to listening. I love the melody and hypnotic harmony, if you’re interested in buying, I suggest you listen to those songs first, but some of the lyrics are a bit dark for my taste (“Scattered her ashes/ then see if you’re ready for the more conceptual songs. But, the album Buried her heart?” Ew.) Yet, the song style is more of a throwback to the is obviously a stylistic evolution for Thirty Seconds to Mars, much like old 30STM albums. The next song, “Kings and Queens” sounds optiBlack Holes and Revelations was for Muse. I think This is War is a sign mistic and joyful, although the lyrics are far from it. By “This is War,” of great things to come from the band, and I impatiently wait for the another great, fast-paced song on the album, I decided that I would next album. have preferred the album sans-fans. The fact was even more evident on

Avatar

by Dylan Gibson Looking back at the past month or so, it would be difficult to dispute that James Cameron effectively owns the box office right now. Having pulled in nearly $1.4 billion so far in cinemas worldwide, his science-fiction thriller Avatar has won fans and detractors alike. Cameron’s use of new digital technology and advanced filmmaking techniques to produce the aesthetically appealing landscape of his extraterrestrial world (“Pandora” as it is known in the film) has elicited praise from all corners of the film industry. Avatar also marks one of the first forays into the uncharted waters of three-dimensional cinema, and if profit means anything, the water appears inviting (and quite lucrative, too). However, Cameron has taken flak from many over Avatar as well. Naturally, in this day and age, it’s hard not to politicize anything and everything you see being promoted in the media. Avatar is no stranger to controversy over what some might call a rather “preachy” message, and one that has been echoed in movies many times. Foray into the third dimension Indeed, it is difficult not to see striking similarities between Avatar and numerous other movies, most notably the western Dances with Wolves and Disney’s Pocahontas. Replace the white man with the entire human race, the rifles with mech-suits and cover your Sioux in blue makeup and stilts, and... voila. Generally, the three films share a fairly common partiality against the destruction of societies for material gain, an awfully hard point to play devil’s advocate. Avatar does, though, believe it or not, have some qualities that are distinguishing it from its other starry-eyed idealist cinematic brethren. Many of these messages are intended to be quite pertinent to our own current state of affairs in the world. One notable chord struck by Avatar lies in its depiction of a corporation as the nemesis. Many historians and movie critics will waste no time in telling you that such details in a film or piece of literature can tell you tons about the general sentiment of society at the time of that work’s production. And there is no doubt that the general sentiment of Americans towards corporate America at the present is not a good one at all. With an economy only now beginning to recover from a devastating recession, while many will dispute whether one of two presidential administrations is at fault or not, no one seems to be holding back their disgust with corporations. Unwise spending, lavish bonuses and generally bad business decisions have not done the economy any good. Our infotainment pundits and armchair-political commentators enjoy comparing

everyone from Bush to Obama with Adolf Hitler. Likewise, many of the same enjoy drawing that line between any particularly corrupt industry (think Big Oil) and the stereotypical cynical mega-corporation bent on destroying the planet for natural resources (which is generally a subsidiary of Big Oil, go figure). Given the controversies over sweat-shop labor and deforestation of many precious virgin forests by corporations over the past decade, many would say that such a comparison isn’t necessarily unwarranted. The use of a former marine as the protagonist also carries a subtle but potent message in the film, though decidedly less controversial than the aforementioned. Whether one is for or against the United States’ current involvement in the Middle East, it doesn’t take a certain perspective to acknowledge that roadside bombs and all other brutal manners of injury both physical and mental have befallen many in our armed services. Pick up any newspaper or magazine and you are bound to find mentions of amputees, post-traumatic stress disorder victims and others trying to readjust to stateside life. With the advent of new technologies both in civilian life and in the military (aerial drones with bombing capabilities, GPS navigation from cell phones, the internet), ethical questions regarding war and national security have become prevalent. Increasingly more sticky issues arise as our technology advances and with it our destructive potential and Avatar does not shy away from this. One of the most controversial messages carried in Avatar, not surprisingly, is also one of the most controversial issues in our own society right now. The depictions of an invading force trying to thrust its agenda upon a reluctant group of inhabitants drives home a sore topic in the political and diplomatic arena right now: the conflict in the Middle East. Of course, one could debate for days the ethical backing behind the current troop deployments in Afghanistan, and more commonly, Iraq. The torture tactics utilized at Guantanamo Bay, the closing of Guantanamo Bay and the question of how to bring justice into the terrorist equation have left both Republicans and Democrats dashing for what moral high ground they can find. Indeed, Avatar’s storyline raises thorny questions regarding these issues. For a fun holiday flick, Avatar does appear to have been pretty loaded on the ethics and morality. After all, what is Christmastime without a good dose of movie-induced misanthropy? Talk about good will towards one’s fellow man. It doesn’t appear that the karma police of Hollywood intend to let up on us either – they’re on a roll. This season, Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel has held a close third in the box office, raking in a nice sum of money. With such grace, it’s an existentialist tour-de-force if I’ve ever seen one.


Features 7 Artist of the month: Norah Gustafson

by Kirk Palmer and Lila Sefat They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but it doesn’t seem so according to Teen, Inc. magazine, where Norah Gustafson won a photography contest. Because she got her picture on the front cover, her photograph got her a couple of paragraphs written by teens from Teen, Inc. who use abbreviations like lol (laugh out loud), tgif (thank god it’s Friday!), and omgicbskjtsg (oh my god I can’t believe Sassy kissed Jacob that’s so gross). That is not to say that Norah’s pictures aren’t worth a thousand words, because they are. Probably more like two thousand. So here are just a few to start:

KP: When did you first get interested in photography? NG: I started taking photography my junior year in high school. I realized that I can perceive things much better through the lens of a camera when I took this photography class. KP: Out of all of your projects, what has been your favorite piece?

NG: This one time I took pictures in a thrift store that turned out really cool. The pictures captured the essence of life in Mississippi--for instance, a row of overweight children watching multiple T.V. sets. KP: What has been your best, most fun, or craziest experience with photography? NG: Probably when I interviewed and photographed a carnival worker, Timothy Lewis. I was shooting my film for the American Express “My Card” project. He was such a bizarre character. He asked me if I wanted to trade my camera for a stuffed animal. I said “No.” KP: Who was the last person you took a picture of? NG: Robert McGehee KP: Where do you get your inspiration while taking photographs? NG: I get a lot of my inspiration while I’m driving. I drive a ton so it gives me a long time to think about my next project. I also get a lot of my inspiration from The Beastie Boys. (continued on p. 8)

Net neutrality

by Natalie Donnell and Bishop Mostellar You’re out with your friends and want to use the Internet on your new phone. You try to access one of your favorite websites, but it’s blocked. You just got the phone as a Christmas present, so you shouldn’t be having any problems. As it turns out, your phone isn’t the problem—the phone service is. Phone service providers are able to block programs and websites that they don’t want you to use. Google Voice (a free texting service) is already blocked on the iPhone, but more of the Internet, including services like Facebook, could be blocked on more phones in the future. If they want, a service provider could even deny access to another provider’s website. Recently, a bill was introduced in the House of Representatives concerning Internet neutrality. Net neutrality guarantees the right for all Internet users to access all web content equally. The House bill, the Internet Freedom Preservation Act, would protect Internet freedom and keep companies from restricting access to websites. Opposition to the act is the Internet Freedom Act of 2009 introduced by John McCain to protect the right of Internet services to restrict what they allow their users to access. McCain believes that regulation would stifle innovation, slow economic turnaround and depress the job market even further. The two acts sound very similar, but are completely different. The Preserva-

tion Act protects access to the entire Internet, while the Freedom Act preserves the rights of businesses to restrict it. Should the government be able to regulate what businesses control or should businesses be able to regulate what we can see? In accordance with the Preservation Act, the Federal Communications Commission would regulate Internet providers and prohibit them from blocking certain programs and websites. In support of the Preservation Act, the American Civil Liberties Union believes that full access to the Internet without corporate monopoly interference is necessary. They believe that business restriction of the Internet will create a corporate monopoly. Recently the House voted unanimously in favor of the Internet Freedom Preservation Act, but there were many arguments which will be followed by more debate. There are many questions that need to be answered concerning the details of the bill, but as of right now, net neutrality is protected. Each of these bills would affect every person who owns a phone. Many bills pass that we normally don’t care about, but this is one that hits close to home and that high school students should notice.

Obscure Mobile history

by Micah McGuire So you think you know about Mobile history? Of course, you say, it’s been drilled into my head since I was a foot tall. But do you know the obscure historical facts about the city? Do you know who Slacaborimico was? What does Oakleigh mean? Could you name all eleven historical districts of Mobile? Okay, I was kidding about the last one. I thought I knew Mobile history. But then I started studying for the Azalea Trail interview. I found out I knew about ten percent of the city’s history. I also found out some obscure facts that I’m fairly sure few people know.

The Azalea Trail: No, the Azalea

Trail is not just a group of girls that Mobile’s historic Bragg-Mitchell walk around in poofy dresses. Or a 10K race. The Azalea Trail was actually a city beautification project started in 1929 by the Jaycees (Young Men’s Service Club). Now here’s the kicker: to encourage Mobilians to plant azalea bushes, gas stations gave away a plant with every purchase. The trail was originally marked by a pink line that took tourists past the best azaleas in the city. Now, the trail is marked by signs.

Historical Homes and Places: Where do I start? There are so

many. My personal favorite is Bellingrath Gardens, which was originally a fishing camp for the super-stressed Mr. Bellingrath. The flagstones of the gardens were actually ship ballasts. Speaking of ships, the

USS Alabama? It was known as the “Lucky A” because it sustained no damage or casualties during WWII. And despite the fact that you might think the Battle House is named for the Battle of Mobile Bay, it’s really named for the three Battle brothers that founded it. Mobile’s most famous antebellum houses also have some obscure history and strange stories. The South’s most photographed antebellum home, the Bragg-Mitchell mansion, is the backdrop to one of the strangest stories I’ve heard. There are two large antique floor mirrors in the house. One of those mirrors was taken by Union soldiers in the Civil War. Well, about a hundred years later, that lost mirror was found in a brownstone mansion in New York City, perfectly intact. You can now see it in the house. Oakleigh, another of Mobile’s famous antebellum homes, got its name from the oaks around the house. In Anglo-Saxon, “leigh” means “meadow,” thus, Oakleigh means “oak meadow.”

Mardi Gras: Who doesn’t know this holiday? In Mobile, it was

started by Michael Krafft. He and a group of friends paraded around downtown Mobile on New Year’s Eve with rakes and equipment from a hardware store, then ended up at the mayor’s house for breakfast. They called themselves the Cowbellion de Rakin Society and became the first of Mobile’s mystic societies. Mardi Gras was halted for the Civil War, but in 1866, Joe Cain dressed up as Chickasaw chief Slacaborimimco and paraded around in a coal cart. After that, the parades and floats returned, and Mobilians have been throwing and catching moonpies and beads ever since.


Sports 8 Artist of the month (Continued from p. 7)

KP: What’s the deal with your photographs in Teen Inc.? NG: Teen, Inc. magazine was having a photography contest. I kind of just randomly entered, not really thinking about it. Then I got an email that I had won. It was pretty cool.The picture was the one that I took of Kristin Granade lying parallel to the lines of a road. The picture didn’t have much of a significant meaning, but I like to leave it open to the viewers to decide what the photo is supposed to mean. KP: What are some of your other art interests? NG: Finger painting, banjos, finger painting banjos, making Indian headdresses, and knitting.

KP: Would you consider using me as a model? NG: If The Beastie Boys tell me to… KP: Do you plan on pursuing a career in photography after high school? NG: Fo’ sho’ KP: How does your Scandinavian ethnicity affect your work? NG: Well it makes me tough, like my ancestors, and I probably wouldn’t be here taking photographs if my great-great- great-grandmother hadn’t got kicked out of Wales. I try to follow my ancestors’ ideology: follow your heart and don’t be afraid to try new things.

Soccer: perks and problems

by Curtis Bailey This reporter has been around the block and knows what’s going on. I have seen the athletic department and I know about the underprivleged and underappreciated soccer section. I am now here to enlighten you about the problems and perks of being on the soccer team. Now is the time for the curtain of soccer to be lifted. The perks to being on the soccer team include missing school, getting cool practice clothes, easy workouts, and cool coaches. Soccer may not be as good as sports like golf or baseball in the getting out of school respect, but it is still a sport that requires you to miss some school, which is always desirable in a sport. Even though soccer uniforms look weird, the practice clothes you get are much better. They look so good that the shirts are commonly worn on out-of-uniform days and the pants are not uncommon in weight room. Another perk of being on the soccer team is that if you play soccer you won’t have to work as hard as you do in other sports. The final perk for being on the soccer team is that you get some very interesting coaches. These coaches are Mike Marshall and Chad Harrelson. Coach Marshall tells plenty of jokes and gets most of the ones you tell which makes him fun to be around even though he might say he saw your mother on Bourbon Street. Coach Harrelson is a very loud person who likes to insult people, but deep down the people he jokes about the most are the ones he likes, (I hope). The problems with being on the soccer team are numerous and severe. These problems include having to wear weird uniforms, having a social handicap because you play soccer, and having to be grouped

with socially awkward people that have no athletic ability. The uniforms for soccer include really tight shirts, really short, tight shorts with a built in diaper, and funny looking socks. “The soccer uniform makes me feel like a gay track star in spandex,” says Alec Depinet. Another common problem with being on the soccer team is that people look down upon soccer players. “All soccer players are pixies,” says Clayton Coleman. Some people seem to have a deep felt opinion that soccer is a weak and easy sport even though there were 1,597,528 notable soccer injuries just in the United States of people between ages 2 and 18 in a 4-year span. Another problem which goes hand in hand with the social handicap is the fact that you have to play with people that are not athletically gifted. They just make you look stupid and uncoordinated being near them. If all this was not bad enough soccer has a record for having strange coaches. Coach Marshall is a loud, scary person with a habit of talking about random things, and Coach Harrelson is a loud nerd that enjoys pleasant chats about Star Trek and X Men comics. With all of these problems, it’s a surprise that anyone wants to fight through and be a soccer player in this obviously hostile environment. Above are the problems and perks of soccer at St. Paul’s, you be the judge on whether you think it’s worth it or not. I’ll leave you with these words to think about: “I think soccer’s fun,” says Daniel Delmas. Curtis out.

Horoscopes by Kirk Palmer

Aquarius (Jan 20 - Feb 18)

Your Valentine will find the key to your heart this weekend, but not before trying the key to your car, the key to your house, and that key that goes to...?

Pisces (Feb 19 - Mar 20)

Somebody out there loves you… maybe a little too much. Don’t worry we’ve notified for help. With any luck, the authorities should have him in custody very soon.

Aries (Mar 21 - Apr 19)

Jealousy, suspicion, and absolute befuddlement will be yours this week when you find yourself at the center of a bizarre love rhombus.

Taurus (Apr 20 - May 20)

Leo (Jul 23 - Aug 22)

This week you should imagine that you’re a hungry lion and you’re hunting for your Valentine, the innocent antelope. But don’t bite her though. You’re not really a lion… That’d just be silly. Lions can’t read horoscopes.

Virgo (Aug 23 - Sep 22)

Stop blaming problems on yourself and other people in your life. Blame various government agencies instead.

Libra (Sep 23 - Oct 23)

Your relationship isn’t dead yet. So tell that to the circling vultures and lurking coyotes.

Scorpio (Oct 24 - Nov 21)

While looking for a Valentine this weekend, issue high pitched calls, fan out your colorful plumage, and avoid being arrested by the alarmed zoo keepers.

As you’ll soon learn, you’ll have problems, and then you’ll have Problems; depending on whether or not it starts at the beginning of a sentence.

Gemini (May 21 - Jun 21)

Sagittarius (Nov 22 - Dec 21)

Tired of being single? Text “HONEY BUNS” to 251-3261852 for a chance to win a hot date for Valentine’s Day. We’re not kidding…

Cancer (Jun 22 - Jul 22)

Remember: It’s not that you can’t find a Valentine; it’s that you won’t find a Valentine.

Is your love life taking a turn for the worse? You may be entitled to a large cash settlement. Call the law firm of Robert Goldwater now.

Capricorn (Dec 22 - Jan 19)

They say good luck and charm never gets one very far in life, which is a comfort for you seeing that you have neither.


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