Sexual Encounters

SEXUAL

Encounters A ZINE BY ENCOUNTERS MAGAZINE BARUCH COLLEGE’S ARTS & LITERARY PUBLICATION

LETTER TO THE READER

Welcome to Sexual Encounters, a limited-print LGBTQ sexual health and awareness zine. Let me start by saying that you are truly welcomed, regardless of whether you have figured it all out or not. The road to self-awareness is one of bumps and bruises, of joys and celebration. So whether you are new here or an exceptional pro, we hope that this publication helps in whatever way you may need.

In designing this zine, we searched for voices within the community whose experiences help illustrate complex yet truthful realities. If you gain nothing else from this zine, I hope that you gain a sense of reassurance that wherever you are in your own personal journey, that there are always resources and a community to help you along the way.

Before you begin, I would like to take a moment to acknowledge the great work and dedication that brought this zine from idea to reality. I give much love and thanks to my fantastic executive board, whom without this would not be a possibility: Bianca Monteiro, Justin Crespo, Britt Molloy, Esther Wong. Special thanks to Brandon Paillere and Bianca, for spearheading the layout and design, to Sarah Miskin for shooting the creative content, and Kenneth Fremer for writing the features.

Another thank you to The Health and Wellness Center and the Diversity Office, as well as all the members of G.L.A.S.S who contributed to the publication. Finally, thank you, reader, for supporting our organization.

All the best, Rebecca Vicente Editor-in-Chief

STAY

G N I

Sex is a wonderful way of expressing intimacy with a partner, as well as a pleasurable act in itself. When engaging in sex, it’s best to practice safe sex to ensure your health, as well as the health of your partner, to have an enjoyable experience.

Safe sex is ultimately an important practice for any sexually active individual. Historically, however, the LGBTQ community has often been glazed over when it has come to discussions of sexual intimacy, health and

preventative care.

Sex is a natural and satisfying experience, and while not everyone has sex or enjoys it, we hope that those who do can make use of the resources offered in this following spread!

We hope that this following compilation is the beginning to an intimate relationship with your very own sexual wellness and equips you with the inclusive tools and resources necessary to explore and enjoy a safe and pleasurable sex life!

ENCOUNTER SEX ED PROTECTIVE METHODS An outside condom is typically used on the penis and is rolled over the glans down to the shaft. This method prevents an exchange of bodily fluids and therefore prevents many STDs. An inside condom is correctly used by inserting it within the front hole, vagina, or anus prior to penetrative sex. Like the outside condom, this method prevents an exchange of bodily fluids and prevents many STDs. A dental dam is similar to a condom and is intended for oral use. While dental dams can be difficult to obtain, it is easily made by simply cutting through a condom.

Gloves are intended to be used with hands penetratively.

With lube, the material can often be more pleasurable.

All of these methods of protection are often used along with lubricant, which can also help to prevent tears in condoms, dams, and gloves, as well as decrease friction and increase pleasure. For oral use, edible lubricant is available.

CONSENT Consent is an integral part of any sexual interaction.

Consent can be given with an audible yes, but can also be given via implied consent.

Implied consent, however, is complicated and is often signaled by body language or other important signals. If you are unsure, it is always important to communicate with your partner(s).

SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED INFECTIONS Getting tested periodically is important for any sexually active person. Sexually transmitted infections are often passed through bodily fluids while some can be passed through skin-to-skin contact, as well as through shared needles. Take charge of your sexual health and wellness and make sure that you are being safe when possible and are testing regularly!

Common STIs include bacterial infections like gonorrhea, chlamydia, and syphillis, or viral STIs like human papillomavirus (HPV), herpes, HIV, and Hepatitis C. While bacterial infections can be easily treated, many viral STIs cannot (save for hepatitis C). While a viral STI cannot be cured, getting medical help is still important to help ensure minimal transmission of the infection.

Safe sex reduces the transmission of sexually transmitted infections. Whether you’re having oral sex, sex with toys, sex with hands or penetrative sex, incorporate safety into your practices to have not only the most pleasurable time but a safe time as well!

“WHAT IF I HAVE AN STI?” If you believe you have an STI, it is important to get tested and notify your sexual partners. Refer to the back of this booklet for local resources to get tested!

FINDING

PRIDE

by Kenneth Fremer

For many members of the LGBTQ community, our formative stages of maturation — whether they be sexual, interpersonal, or individual — are endured in isolation. Most of us spend a lot of our time “growing up” hidden in the closet and it’s a tight fit. We are sequestered by a heteronormative culture, which makes it easy for us to feel invisible. We’re never truly seen, nor do we feel taken care of, through many of these precious, essential years. A fundamental disconnect from close-minded peers, acquaintances, or even family members can and often does form over time, but we continue to grow, find hope and become courageous when we find our pride.

CASSANDRA CASTELANT “ the purpose of a community isn’t to find other people, but to find yourself”

When I first came to the LGBTQ club on campus I was a really shy, overly enthusiastic ex-highschooler.

I didn’t have any friends except for my FRO buddies and I was kind of a weirdo. I’m still as much of a weirdo — but I have the connections and confidence to put myself out there. I feel like the purpose of a community isn’t to find other people, but to find yourself. I really saw this as a space where I could be myself — and the people who came here, knew the type of person I was and respect me as a person. Now that I’m growing out of this space on campus, I can still look back on these bittersweet memories and realize how essential they were to my growth. I don’t believe I’d be the same person without them, and can continue to represent my LGBT community in full splendor.

We’re told that there’s strength in numbers — so what do you do when you feel completely alone? Time and time again, I’ve found that queer people tend to simply find a way. One way or another, we align with

each other — we realize that we can overcome problems we’d never had real allies in tackling. We learn how to take care of our sexual health, how to feel less alone, how to form relationships, how to love. Most importantly, we learn to take pride in our respective identities. It’s through this pride that a concrete connection built out of community, solidarity, and power flourishes.

WILLIAM LIN Pride to me means not just being LGBT and out, pride for me is having agency to showcase my skills and prove that I have more than what it takes to be a leader in the free world. By having pride I gained a community, a family, and a personal entourage at Baruch. Clubs and organizations now have the prerogative to seek for help from G.L.A.S.S. and allow us to help them, which shows the progress we’ve made in just the past couple of years.

“Pride for me is having agency to showcase my skills and prove that i have more than what it take to be a leader in the free world”

MUSIC

TO GET YOU IN THE MOOD

by Kenneth Fremer “I Know a Place” MUNA I Know a Place immediately hits it off as a rallying cry for the queer community; if rallying cries were typically more tender than aggressive, and more politically concerned than primal. In the wake of the Pulse mass shooting in 2016, MUNA recognized the need for an LGBTQ anthem that acknowledged the community’s highs and lows the celebration and the connection, as well as the fear that can come from being part of a marginalized community. It’s defiant in its bright buoyancy, with one eye always trained toward the anxiety one can feel when being open about their

sexuality. By the time the chorus hits, our fears are alleviated. Lead singer Katie Gavin assures the listener that there will always be a place where they don’t have to fear openness, even if it’s only within one song, or on one dance floor.

“Play the Field” PARTNER Canadian rock band Partner serves as an excellent example of the new wave of gay-centric artists taking over the indie rock scene. They’re funny, joyful, and not at all serious — perhaps most importantly, they embrace their sexuality by shredding on twin-necked guitars over classic hard rock hooks. In “Play the Field,”

the band toys with some suggestive high school sports metaphors: “Hockey / Soccer / Basketball / Girl I heard you play them all,” which are explored in tandem with a surprisingly tender sexual comingof-age story in the girls’ locker room.

Referee whistles and xylophones fill out the song’s rhythm section, imbuing it with bounce and levity — if only coming out could always feel this fun.

“Make Me Feel” JANELLE MONÀE “Make Me Feel” isn’t an inherently queer song upon first listen. Against a slinky, Prince-esque beat and bassline, Monáe gradually amps up sexual tension through playful comeons and sly vocals directed toward some genderless object of desire.

The video itself is a much more explicit portrayal of these urges - a veritable explosion of pansexuality,

Monáe bounces back and forth between male, female, and ambiguosly gendered objects of affection.

She bathes herself in luxurious “bi lighting,” as she proves to the viewer that her sexuality is an inherent part of any love that she makes or song that she puts out. The video comes across as an embrace of her sequality in all of its forms — a true power play for the digital age.

Literally any Brittney Spears song!

Britney Spears has never dated a woman or displayed any sort of same-sex attraction, barring one onstage kiss at the 2003 MTV Video Music Awards with Madonna. That being said, if the LGBTQ community were an academic institution, she would have been conferred an Honorary Doctorate Degree in Gay Culture well over a decade ago. As a wise woman once said, “It’s Britney, bitch.”

DO I HAVE TO TRIM MY NAILS TO HAVE SEX WITH MY GIRLFRIEND?

ASK BRITT Britt is the managing editor for Encounters Magaine and identifies as a lesbian. As a woman who has been out for roughly 10 years, Britt prides herself in her knowledge of gay bars in Manhattann. Her favorite characters on “The L Word� are Alice and Bette.

You should not feel the need to have trimmed nails to be intimate with a partner. However, it is up to the comfort of your partner. Personally, I have experienced that trimmed or filed nails are most effective. Sometimes nails that are pointier in shape or have sharp edges can cause internal cuts. Some people, however, enjoy being penetrated by these types of nails.

HOW COMMON IS PEGGING AMONG STRAIGHT GUYS?

For readers who do not know, pegging is a term for anal penetration. Men of any sexual orientation can be stimulated sexually from anal penetration. It is not an act that constitutes a man as gay; it is an act of pleasure. Also, it should be just that: pleasurable. If it is something that is of interest, I would suggest a mutual consent between both the person interested in getting pegged and the person interested performing the act. Anyone can be anally penetrated by either a penis or a strap-on dildo.

CAN PEOPLE FEEL GUILTY AFTER A SEXUAL EXPERIENCE?

Yes, a person can feel guilt after sex. It depends on the context of the situation, but not all sexual encounters are positive. However, no one should feel guilty for having gay sex. Heteronormativity is a pervasive issue and unfortunately enforces the idea that anything other than straight sex in the missionary position is taboo. Gay sex is completely normal, and you shouldn’t ever feel guilty for being gay because gay is natural and okay!

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON LESBIAN DATING APPS? The top two dating apps for women who have any sexual attraction to women are OkCupid and HER. I would say that HER is the female equivalent of Grindr. Profiles on HER will explicitly say whether a person is interested in sexual encounters or romantic relationships. I would suggest making your intentions known up front to avoid confusion.

THE BEST THING TO DO IS BE CLEAR WITH YOUR PARTNER ABOUT WHAT THEY FIND PLEASURABLE, AND FEEL FREE TO CONSENSUALLY EXPERIMENT! CAN A MTF TRANS PERSON IMPREGNATE A FTM TRANSPERSON? The answer to this question will depend on a person’s stage of transitioning. If both people are in the beginning stages of transitioning and are pre-op, then yes, it is possible for a FTM trans person to be impregnated by a MTF trans person. If both people, or one partner, is post-op, then there will not be impregnation. What is needed for impregnation is a uterus with eggs to interact with a penis with sperm.

Every trans person’s journey is different, however, and no one’s genitilia should ever be assumed.

THE OFFICE OF HEALTH & WELLNESS

RESOURCES

Some LGBT youth are more likely than their heterosexual peers to experience negative health and life outcomes. It is important that at-risk LGBT youth have access to resources and support to deal with the questions and challenges they may face as they mature.

IT GETS BETTER PROJECT ITGETSBETTER.ORG

The It Gets Better Project reminds teenagers in the LGBT community that they are not alone and it will get better.

Q CARD PROJECT QCARDPROJECT.ORG

The Q Card is a simple and easy-to-use communication tool designed to empower LGBTQ youth to become actively engaged in their health, and to support the people who provide their care.

THE TREVOR PROJECT THETREVORPROJECT.ORG

The Trevor Project is a national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning young people ages 13-24.

RESOURCES CONTINUED INTERFERENCE ARCHIVE

Reimagining archives as a “community space,” this volunteer-run organization functions additionally as a gallery and a library for historical materials related to social and political activism. interferencearchive.org

THE DOOR GAY & LESBIAN COLLECTIONS OF THE NYPL

The New York Public Library’s Manuscripts and Archives Division has over 100 collections pertaining to the history and culture of gay men and lesbians. nypl.org

CLAGS CENTER FOR LGBTQ STUDIES

The first university-based research center in the United States dedicated to the study of historical, cultural, and political issues for LGBTQ individuals and communities. clags.org

ANTI-VIOLENCE PROJECT

Coordinates with other organizations to prevent, respond to, and end all forms of violences against and within LGBTQ communities. avp.org

FUNDERS FOR LGBTQ ISSUES

Conducts research and provides training and support services to increase LGBTQ cultural competence. lgbtfunders.org

FIERCE

Membership-based organization dedicated to building the next generation of social justice leaders and enhancing the power of LGBTQ youth of color in NY through youth-led campaigns, leadership development programs and cultural expression. fiercenyc.org

HETRICK-MARTIN INSTITUTE

Provides free year-round programs and services for LGBTQ youth and allies ages 13-24 at locations in New York City and Newark, NJ. Programs include arts and culture, health and wellness, academic enrichment, job readiness, and counseling. hmi.org

Provides comprehensive youth development services in a diverse and caring environment. The Door offers a wide range of services including reproductive health care and education, mental health counseling and crisis assitance, legal assistance, GED and ESOL classes, tutoring and homework help, college prep services, career development, job training and placement, supportive housing, sports and recreational activities, arts, and nutiritous meals - all for free, completely confidentially. alifor neycenter.org

LESBIAN HERSTORY ARCHIVES

One of the largest collections of materials by and about lesbians and their communities. lesbianherstor yarchives. org

THE ALI FORNEY CENTER

Provides LGBTQ young people housing and a continuum of supportive services to help them thrive and prepare them for independent living. alifor neycenter.org

CENTER FOR TRANSGENDER MEDICINE & SURGERY

The Mount Sinai Center for Transgender Medicine and Surgery delivers advanced care for trans and gender non-conforming people. The CTMS team is a comprehensive group of providers who have expertise in primary care, hormone therapy, behavioral health support, gender-affirming surgeries, and other supportive services.

275 Seventh Avenue New York, NY 10011 (212) 604-1730 CTMSinfo@mountsinai.org

TRANSGENDER LEGAL DEFENSE & EDUCATION FUND TLDEF provides free legal services, as well as a name-change project, education, and advocacy for transgender and gender non-conforming people.

TLDEF is committed to ending discrimination based upon gender identity and expression and to achieving equality for transgender people through public education, test-case litigation, direct legal services, community organizing and public policy efforts.

20 West 20th Street Suite 705, New York, NY (646) 862-9396 info@transgenderlegal.org

LOCAL LEGAL SERVICES HOUSING WORKS Transgender Evening Program and Transgender Transitional Housing Program provides legal services, in addition to HIV/AIDS services, homeless and food services, detox, referrals, and more.

57 Willoughby Street 2nd Floor, Brooklyn, NY (347) 473-9675 info@housingworks.org

HIV/AIDS TESTING

FORT GREENE

RIVERSIDE

295 Flatbush Avenue Ext. 2nd Floor, Brooklyn, NY

160 W 100th Street New York, NY

(212) 639-9675

(212) 639-9675

JAMAICA

Monday to Friday 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.

Monday to Friday 8:30 a.m. to 3:00 p.m.

Saturday 8:30 a.m. to 12 p.m.

Saturday 8:30 a.m. to 12 p.m.

90-37 Parsons Boulevard 1st Floor, Jamaica, NY

Last Friday of every month closed

Tuesday to Thursday 5 p.m. to 7 p.m.

AIDS HOTLINE 311

(212) 639-9675 Monday to Friday 8:30 a.m. to 3:00 p.m.

MORE ABOUT

ENCOUNTERS MAGAZINE Encounters Magazine is Baruch College’s leading arts & literary publication. Its mission since 1993 has been to exclusively serve Baruch artists and writers, allowing them a space on campus to grow and showcase their work.

Enounters Magazine is a proud ambassador for Adobe Creative Suite. This publication’s content and layout was created and edited using Adobe Lightroom, Adobe Photoshop, and Adobe InDesign.

Encounters Magazine expresses gratitude to everyone who helped bring this publication to life!

We especially thank: Sarah Miskin Kenny Fremer Bianca Nitta Monteiro Brandon Paillere William Lin Cassandra Casselant Joy Allison Mona Jha Our biggest thanks to the magazine’s editor-in-chief, Rebecca Vicente, who was instrumental in inspiring the creation of this necessary publication.