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First published by Primal Instinct Publishing 2023 Copyright ©2024 by Nelle Nikole
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Amaia ah-MY-ah
Alexiares ah-LEK-see-ah-rees
Abel AY-bel
Elie EL-lee
Finley FIN-lee
Jax JAKS
Lola LOH-lah
Luna LOO-nah
Malachai ma-LA-kai
Prescott PRES-kut
Reina RAY-nah
Riley RY-lee
Ronan ROH-nan
Seth SETH
Sloan slown
Tomoe toh-MOH-eh
Yasmin YAHZ-meen
Elementals
Fire(Ignis)mastersofflames,wieldthepoweroffire
Water(Aqua)manipulatorsofwaterinallforms
Earth(Terra)controllersoftheearth
Air(Aer)commandersoftheair
Skills
Umbra Mortis abilitytomakeanythingandeverythingaweaponwithunparalleledprecision Scholar knowledgeispower
Tinkerer (Physiscus)possessaknackforallthingsscienceandtechnology
TheOthers
Supra heightenedphysicalabilities–faster,stronger,taller
Pansie zombiemutation
Brujas wieldersofthedarkarts
You’ve come tothe rightplace ifyou’re a reader whocraves vividimageryandimmersive worlds.Scanthe QRcodes belowtodiscovertheWorldofRisinganditscharacters
PinterestBoard
OriginStories(Recommendedbutnotrequired)
To the little girls who never took any shit. Especially from a man
Riley
Everythingwaslost.Oursafeplace,ourhaven,ourplaceofpeace,wasnomore.
IhadyettoreceivewordfromAmaia.Therealityofoursituationwasmysisterwouldnotbereturningforsome time.MyfamilythatIhadgrowntoloveweregone,andthefateofourhomewasuptome.Amaia,Reina,Tomoe,and AlexiareswoulddowhattheycouldfromDuluth,andPrescottandIwoulddoourbesttoholddownthefort.
Sethwouldmeethisownfate,soonenough Theuniversedidnotrewardevil Ihadtobelievethat Hadtohavefaithin somethinglarger,orwhatelsewasanyofthisfor?
Ifwe playedour cards right,andthe stars alignedinour favor,thenwe’dhave a fightingchance ofcomingoutofthis withatleasthalfofourpeoplealive.Thisfamilyofminewasfullofsacrificiallambs.Thelifewehadcreatedwasworththe risk.Amaiawouldalwaysbemypriority,butIcouldnotprotectherfromhere.
SoIwouldfocusonprotectingtheplaceandpeopleshelovedthemost TheCompound.
“Yourstanceneedstoremainadaptive,Eleanor.Leaveyourneckexposed,andyoudie.”
WewereinThePitpracticingamongothers It’dbeenthatwayalotlately,everyoneusingmostoftheir sparetimeto brushupontheirskills.Civiliansandsoldiersalike,doingtheirbesttostayready.Ourpeopledidn’thavetheluxuryofgetting readyanymore Itwasstayreadyorbecaughtoffguardwhentheytrytotakedownourwalls, again Wrongplaceatthewrong timeandbeingsurprisedcouldmeanyourdeath.
Elie’s goldencurls bounced as she weaved out of myreach. “It’s Elie, and youknow that,” she said, her endurance waning
I’dcometofindIhadanothersistertolookoutfor,totakeundermyprotection.AfterAmaialeft,Eliehadappearedlost, onedge Nervous Andnervousenergywasnevergood
Amaia had spent a lot of time wrestling with the idea of Elie receiving substantial training. She’d been dead set on
keepingherfrombeinginvolvedwithhertroops,discouragingheraspirationsofbeingasoldier.DoingherbesttokeepElie frombecoming her. The wayAmaia saw things, sixteenwas far too youngto understand what beinga soldier meant, what doingthejobconsistedof InElie’sbestinterest,Amaiahadkeptherawayfromeverythingexceptthebasics I’d understood, but this wasn’t The Before. The time for hand-holding was over. Not that I’d ever believed in that anyway Itwasapointofcontentionforusinthepast,butIfiguredAmaiawouldforgivemefortrainingherifitmeantElie stayedalive.
Sure, I’d been training her physically, mentally But I’d also respected Amaia’s decisions Decided to delegate her specialtyinawaythatgavetheperceptionthatshewasinvolved,butkeptherawayfromdanger.I’dchosentochallengeher Tinkerergene,usinghertohelpbuildweaponsthatcouldbebeneficial.Anddamn,didshehaveaknackforexplosives.
Elieglanceddownatherfeet,checkingherstance Igrabbedherfistbeforeshehadthechancetothrowasuccessfuljab, takingadvantageofthehesitation.Theweakness.
“In here” I swung my right arm, the movement purposely slow enough for her to predict “it’s Eleanor I amyour teacher,notyourfriend.Youknow whatAmaiaoncetoldme?Thatinvisiblefeeling?Inyourgut?That’syourprimalinstinct keepingyoualive Thatisthemostinnatesurvivaltoolushumanshave Follow thatfeeling Fearisagift Alwaystrustyour gut.”
I flipped her on her back, careful to avoid her head slamming into the ground but rough enough to prove my point. “Becausehadyoulistenedtoyours,youwouldn’tbeinthispositionrightnow”
Browneyesstaredupatme,tearswellingupatthementionofAmaia.I’dtoldherthetruthofthebetrayal.Therestof TheCompoundhadyettobemadeaware Prescott,TheCouncil,andIhaddiscusseditforhours Ultimately,determiningthat withoutthegeneralhere,therevelationofSeth’sactofterrorismwouldbethestickthatbrokethedam.
Eliehadbeenfurious.Inher timearoundJaxandAmaia,she’dgrownfamiliar withSethtoo.Hadatleasttrustedhim, andhe’dbetrayedherbyfailingherfavoriteperson.
Shesmackedmyhandaway.“Don’tbabyme,Icanstandonmyown.Again.”
Hereyeswerehard,focused,thoughtheslackinherposturegaveheraway Sheneededrest,yethereshewas,readyto go.Relentlesswhenitcametoafight.Asoldierfirst,apersonsecond.Exceptshewasn’tasoldier,shewasakid,Ireminded myself,promisingnottocrossthatbarrieragain
“Youtwoare soalike,it’s terrifying.” Ichuckled,grabbingher bythe shoulder andguidingher towarda benchonthe outerpartofThePit.“Takeabreath.Getsomewater.”
“Istheretimetotakeabreathandgetwaterinthemiddleofabattlefield,Riley?”
Myeyesnarrowed,glaringinherdirection.Sheduckedherhead,turningtofollowdirections.Elieploppeddownonto thebenchwithahuff,rollinghereyes
Over the course ofthe lastfew weeks, there'd beenanattackatour gate twice. Our borders had knownno peace, but we’dheldsteady Fornow Iwasn’tsurehowmuchlongeroursoldierscouldholdon Everymorning,ourgatesweregreeted withflocksofpeoplefrombeyondthewallsacrossMontereyterritory.Thereasontheyarrivedvaried.Somecameinsearch ofsanctuaryand safety, others were determined to have a base locationto put up a fight. Thankfully, withSeth’s departing words,I’dknowntodebriefPrescottwithouthavingtowaitonhearingbackfromAmaia Herinstructionsfortheworst-case scenariohadbeenvague,butenoughtoworkwithingettingthingsrampedupbackhome.
Itwasnolongerasecretthatwarwasheadedourway Onourdoorstep,oneknockaway Undernormalcircumstances, I’d welcome any newcomers with open arms. The more bodies, the more work that would be done, the more solid of a settlementwe’dbecome Nowthough,theywerejustextrauntrainedbodiesthatwouldbeintheway Morebodiesthatneeded protection.
Eliegulpeddownher lastsipofwater,wipingher mouthandkickingher feet,watchingtheothers sparringaroundus. The smell ofsweatand tangyscentofblood filled the air as she sprangto her feet Ilaughed ather attemptto catchme off guard. She lowered into position, a smirk passed over her lips, her throwing knife now in hand. Elie tilted her head, challengingmetotakeitfromher
Amaiahadgiftedittoher,leavingitather doorstepthe morningshe’dleftfor Duluth.She’dsoughtme outrightafter, demandingIteachherhowtouseit,statingthatifIdidn’thelpher,she’dsimplyhavetolearnherself Theknifeneverlefther side,hermostprizedpossession.
“Let’sdoknivesnext,”sheteased.
Iscoffed Thiskidwasapieceofwork,truly Sayingnothing,Iturnedonmyheels,leadingthewaytowardoneofthe targetroomsintheundergroundportionofThePit.
Shrill screams rangoutinthe directionofthe NorthGate Not again Elie glanced toward me, eyes glimmeringwith mischief.
“Ifyoutrytostopme,”shesaid,“you’llbewastingprecioussecondsthosepeopledon’thave.” Agroanescapedmythroat,mylocsdancingasIshookmyhead,“Keepup.” Elieranatmyside,readytodefendwhatwasours.
ThreeweekshadpassedsinceSethleftus,abandoningthefamilywethoughthe’dgrowntolove.Tobebetrayedandthen abandoned…therewasnoinstructionmanualonhowtogrievealossofthatmagnitude.
It was different fromdeath. He had chosen this path. Deliberately set out to hurt us and left our hearts in tiny pieces.Leftustogrievethelossofapersonwhowasverymuchstillalive.Atfirst,itwasashock.Reinarefusedtoacceptit, herdenialunyielding
She was convinced he would come back, that he wasn’t truly on their father’s side and instead would return having talkedhimdown Seth will save us all Just you watch,shehadsaid ThepaininTomoe’seyeshadletmeknow thatwasn’t evenaremotepossibilityinourfuture.Atleastnotatthemoment.
Thatwas a visage Tomoe displayed mostdays. Eachword she uttered was laced withvenom. Like itwas painful for evenhertosay.Notbecauseshecaredifithurtme,butbecauseithurthertolookatme.Totalktome.Weinteractedwitheach otherwhenwehadto,spokewhenitwasrequiredtogetthejobdone.Besidesthat,Iwasdeadtomysisters.
Our days were busy The firstmorningafter Seth’s departure we’dsetstraighttowork The message ofthe impending warhadspreadthroughoutthemajornetworksinSalemTerritoryandTheExpanse.Thingshadbeenkeptquiet,fornowthere wasnonewsofthefatebestoweduponmyfamilyandI
Thesilenceofthegrapevinemeantnothingtome.IknewSethhadalreadymadeittotheirfather,feltitinmygut.Ronan Mooreknewdamnwellwewerestillalive.Andnowhewouldplothisnextmovewhileweremainedherelikesittingducks, somethingI’dworkedhardtokeepusfrombeing I’dbedamnedtositheretwiddlingourthumbs,waitingtoseehowCovert Province would retaliate. Now was the time to research, to gather evidence, to build up our ownforces. Mostimportantly, figureouthowIcouldputanendtothatmanandanyonewhofollowedhim
Sloanhad put together a small teamto accompanyus outside the walls to conduct field researchand gather what we
Amaia
couldfromattacksnearbyandpassingherds.Thingshadchangedquickly.Attheforefrontofthismess,ithadbeeneitherthe OGPansiesortheupgradedversions,notamixofthetwo.Maybeafewwouldstumbleintoanotherherdhereandthere,but now,theymovedasone
Ithadbecomeacommonoccurrencetoseeanevenmix.ThemadePansiesguidedtheoriginals.
“Riddleme,howherdmentalitymakesanysense?It’sapisspoortheoryatbest,”Reinasaid,glaringatthethreeDuluth TinkerersSloanhadassignedtoourmission.“Thesearethebestscientists youhave?”Hervoicewascold,detached.
“Reina ”Iwarned,begginghertostopbeforethingsescalatedagain Beratingthemwouldn’tmakethemanysmarter Hericyeyesglaredbackatme.“What,Amaia?”
“She’s right,” Sloansaid, staringdownher nose distastefullyather cousin. “Herd mentalityis psychological. Itrelies solelyoninfluenceandbehavior,notcommunication”
Shehadmajoredinpsychologyincollege,andthoughthoseyearswerefarbehindus,Itrustedherjudgment.
“Thenwe’rebacktonothing?”Iasked
Achairscrapedacrossthefloor,fallingforwardatmyfeet.“Yes,Amaia,I’dimaginebeingbacktonothingisprecisely whatanother disprovedhypothesisindicates”Tomoe’sthinlipspulledintoasnarl
TheywerestillfuriouswithmeoverSeth.Notthatitwasn’tjustified,butIfoundthathisbetrayalheightenedtheseverity oftheir emotions. I’d grownused to itfromher and Reina both. Mysisters hated me for mybetrayal. So Iturned the other cheek Iftheirsurvivalinthiswarralliedaroundresentingme,thensuckingitthefuckupwouldbecomemyfull-timejob
The twoofthemspentwhatlittle free time we didhave these days awayfromme andwitheachother.Oddlyenough, AlexiareshadbecomemyonlycompanioninthewakeofSeth’sdeparture ReinaandTomoeonlyinteractedwithmewhenour jobsrequiredusto.Whereeveryoneelselookedatmewithdistasteorhatred,hiseyeshadbeenkind.Soft.Proud.Ifthedamn, warm,fuzzyfeelingIgotwhenhiseyeslandedonminewasasin,thencallmeasinner.
Mostdays we justtalked,oftenlate intothe night,findingourselves accustomedtofallingasleepinmyroom.Nothing hadhappenedbetweenus.Theideaofsleepingateachother’ssidehadbecomecomfortable.Routine.Yet,Icouldn’thelpbut getthesensethatweweretreadingdangerousterritory
Wakingupnestledintohimeverymorninghadquicklybecomethehighlightofmyday.Therewassomethingsoserene aboutthosemoments,thegentlenesstowhichhestrokedthecurlsofmyhairasheslowlycameto ButwithSethlightingour entirelivesonfire,nowhardlyseemedthetimetoexplore what ifs.
Iwatchedhim,tracingtheoutlinesoftheinkthatcurvedaroundthenapeofhisneck,reachingtowardhisears.Theway his hazelnuteyes shifted,processingthe informationwe’dspentweeks digesting.He satstaringatsome generic-ass dolphin paintingthatbelongedinsideadentist’soffice.Theroomwe’dgrownaccustomedtomeetinginwasfullofoddpaintingsthat didn’tappeartobelong Itwasunnerving
Mybrows scrunched. The thoughtofthe clickingnoises the Pansies made triggered somethinginme. Sounds thatonly nightmarescouldconstruct Theyallmadethem,butthecadenceofclicksandgruntsfromthecreatedonesdifferedfromthose we’dspentthelastfiveyearsfighting.
“Idon’tsupposeecholocationisaplausibletheory,”Isaid,half-joking.
The roomwentquiet;Iglanced up atReina, eyes questioning She said nothingas Itookinthe other Tinkerers Their chattingstopped,nowstaringateachother,mouthsagape.
“No no,it’snot Butyoumaybeontosomethingelse”Reinatookaseat,hergriefflowingthroughouttheroom Ibitdownonayelpofpain.Everyonearoundtheroomgraspedtightlyontowhatevertheirhandscouldfind.Notasingle soulspoke,growingaccustomedtohernewfoundlackofcontroloverhergiftsunderpressure
Sloan’s fierce blue eyes found mine, the tension fromour previous conversations onhow to handle Reina filling the spacebetweenus.ToSloan,griefwasweakness.Apointlessemotionthatgotinthewayofgettingthejobdone.
Gonewerethetwobestfriends,theroomies thatsharedlaughs andinsidejokes Thereweresomanymemories Now weweresimplytwostrangers,withmutualinterestswhohappenedtotrusteachother.Allies.
Alliesinwarwithhistory
“Reina,talktous.Where’syourmindgoing?”Imovedtoherside,cuttingoffSloan’sviewofhercousin. Herheadsnappedtowardme “Givemeasecond,wouldyou?”
Tomoe’sinkyeyesfoundmineoverReina’sshoulder.Onthis,wehadfoundcommonground.Sheplacedherhandonthe upperportionofReina’sbackincomfort.
“Reina,themorebrainpower,thebetter Whatisit?”Herraven-coloredhairspilledinfrontofherfaceasshepeered down,tryingtomeetReina’sstare.
“Mymom,”shemumbledinresponse “WhenIwasakid,shegushedaboutsomestudy Dolphins,theywereherfavorite animal.Theyfiguredoutdolphinscouldreplicateadvancedspokenlanguage.Conversations.Similartowhatwecoulddo.It wasgroundbreaking,thoughIdon’trememberhearingmuchofanythingaboutitafter…acousticsignals.Theyhelpwithgroup coordination, ya know, hunting and traveling. The pitch and frequency vocalizations help them stay together or convey informationabouttheir intentions and movements to other pod members. Holymoly… the Pansies are communicatingwith
eachotherthroughacousticsignals.”
Her eyes danced atthe thought. The other Tinkerers murmured, pullingbooks downfromthe surroundingshelves and flippingpages We all remained quiet, waitingto see ifshe had more to add Reina shotacross the room, grabbinga chalk boardandjottingnotesdown.
Tomoe’s eyes went wide withannoyance, the red rims around thema clear indicationthat she wasn’t as okayas she pretendedtobe.“Okay,I’llbethefirsttoask.Whatthehelldoesthatmean?”Shedeadpanned.
“Itmeanswe’rescrewed”Reinasaid,emotionvapidinhervoice
TherewasnohesitationaboutwhatwasdiscussedinfrontofDuluth.Informationhadflowedfreelybetweenour sides oncewe’destablishedthetermsofusworkingtogether.Everythingwe’dknown,theynowknew,withinreason.
The lastfew weeks had beenspenttryingto understand exactlyhow the Pansies were beingmade, how theydiffered fromtheonesthisworldhadgrownaccustomedto.Moreimportantly,howthehellMoehadpowersharedwithSeth.
“They never lost the ability to form complex thoughts,” I added, “only needed the chance to evolve a new way of communicating.”
Justbecausetheirthoughtshadturnedprimal,aboutsurvival,didn’tmeantheabilitytothinkandcomprehendnolonger existed.IexplainedtoSloanandherteamthestorymyfamilyhadalreadyheard.
My first fiancé, Xavier, had turned practically upon nuclear touchdown. The radiation only gave us mere moments togetherbeforechangingmylifeforever He’dgonePansie,andIran,onlytohavetokill himlatertosurvive Itwasduring thatfatefulfightthatIdiscoveredmymagic.
Flameshadignitedinmypalmsintheflurryofpanic,andI’dbroughtmyhanddown,intendingtograbhisshoulderand push him away. When Xavier glanced down at where my hands had touched him, then back at me, an expression of astonishmentcrossedoverhisfaceathissafety.Myflameshadn’tburnedhim,becausemymagiconlyansweredmydesires. TheywouldnotburnthoseIdidnotintendtoharm.ButIdidharmhimthatday.Idroveaknifethroughhisskullandstarteda newlife.Thislife.AndnowIknewthetruth.
Thathe’dstillbeeninthere Fucking hell.
Thisentiretime,I’dbeenright YearsofpeopletellingmeIwascrazy,tryingtotalkmedown,andIhadbeenrightall along.Theconfirmationgavemenorelief.Idustedmyfingersoverthetattoothatlayhiddenbeneathmywoolsweater.
“Amaia…”Reinasaid,thedistasteformytheorycomingforward,readytoshutmedown.
“Reina,” Ihissed,“outthere,whenwe’re offinthe privacyofour ownspace,youcancutme off,youcanignore me. Hell,youcanevencussmeout.Buthere,outsidethefourwallsofyourapartment,Iamyourgeneral,andyouwillhearwhatI havetosaybeforedismissingme”
Reina’s eyes wenthard, narrowingatSloan, who smirked atthe sternness ofthe command. Achill trickled downmy spine The resemblance betweenher and Sethat the moment was haunting Alexiares cleared his throat, slicingthroughthe tensionintheroom.HecaughtSloan’sattention,nowglaringinhisdirection,withascoff.
“Problem,Sloan?”Alexiaresbitout.
“We’re sharing the same oxygen,” she said with a taunting smile “I think I’ll always have a problem with that, Bloodhound. ”
Friendlyfire had a better chance of takingone of the two out thanour shared enemy He was knownthroughout The Expanseasabloodhound.TheBloodhound.PartofthereasonTheExpansewasneverabletogetarealfootingoranounceof stabilizationwasbecauseeverytimesomeonecompetentwasputinplace,theymysteriouslycameupdead Brutallymutilated typeofdead.
Alexiaressniffed,afakesmilepullingacrosshisangledfaceasheobservedme,readingthewordsinmyeyes. Not here, not now
“Goon,”hesuggested,proudofhiseffortstogivemethefloor.
“Whatifall yourfatherdidwasspeedupevolution?”IaskedReinapointedly “Whatifhemerelyenhancedwhatwas alreadypossible?Gavethemtheabilitytovocalizewhatwasalreadygoingonbehindthosesoullesseyes.”
Foronce,IhopedIwasmistaken Theevidencesuggestedotherwise
What a bitter pill to swallow. “Anupgradedversion,”Tomoemuttered.
Iinhaledsharply,“Yep”
Reinachewedherbottomlip,considering.
“It is technicallypossible,giventheworldwelivein,”oneoftheTinkererssaidinbetweenrufflingpagesofthebook theirheadwasburiedin.
Reinanoddedslowly,comingtoadecision.
“No,you’reright,Amaia.Asusual,youareright.”Thedisdaininhervoicewasapunchtothegut.“Hestartedturnin’ peoplebyinjectingthemwithwhateverMoesawinthelittlevialsinhervision.Thatmuchwe’regonnahavetopiecetogether
withtheinformationwehave.There’snotawaytoprovethatonourown.Ethically.Wealsoknowhe’susingthemtochange thepopulation,makeitstronger. ”
Shufflingand a few drycoughs circled the room, the accusationintheir eyes atwho her father was Who she had the potentialtobe,whotheythoughtlurkedjustbeneath‘good’facade.
Sheclearedherthroat “To him,in his opinion Thequestionremains,howmanyofyourpeople,likelysoonourpeople, willhechangetoaccomplishhisgoal?Becausetheanswertothatdetermineshowmuchshitwe’reinifAmaiaisright.Letme tellya,weshouldallbehopingshe’snot”
“Whathappensifsheisright?”Alexiaresasked,sittingupstraight.
Itwas a fair question. Reina’s eyes brimmed withfear, thoughher magic calmed everyone. Itwasn’ta good ending. I couldtell IfIwasright,wewereinforsomeshit Adisastrousending Thatwaswherewewereheaded Forwewouldnot only have to fight other humans who had both modern weapons and magic, we would have to fight evolved Pansies too. Pansieswhonowhadtheabilitytocommunicate Tostrategize
“Thenthiswarwilltakeamiracletowin.”
“Wearen’tentirelyfucked.Westillhavepowersharing.”Isaid,chewingthesideofmycheeks.
ItwasthelastthingIhadupmysleeve.I’dbeenavoidingit,hopingthatwe’dbeabletorunofftheideaofa simpleprotectionspell.Tryingtopowershareamongtheindividualsinthisroom.
“Yeah,thatyouhavenoideahow toreplicate.We’vebeenrunningthroughyourbaselesstheoriesforweeks,andwhat dowehave?Nothing Nada”Sloangrowled,shrugginghershouldersinindifference Suddenly, Isympathized withher uncle. Ifyoucouldn’tbreed impatience outoftheir bloodline, maybe a punchto her fuckingmouthwouldhelp Hertemperremindedmesodamnmuchofhercousin
Reinawasquicktohavemyback.“Watchit,cousin,”shesnarled.
“Orwhat,you’llcry?Throwagrieffit?Bringeveryonetotheirkneeswithyourtears?Growup.Yourweaknesswon’t getusfar,”Sloansaid.
Mysisterstrodeover,chestpressedagainsthercousin.Theireyeswerelevel,theicyblueinthemspinningthesamesea storm Whoever this versionofSloanwas painted a starklydifferentpicture fromthe happy, carefree girl Amaia had talked aboutwhentellingstories ofher life inThe Before. True enough, this versionofReina was differentfromthe one thathad existedonlyafewweeksago
Sufferingagreatlosscoulddothattoaperson.Tothemboth.
“JustbecauseIcrydoesn’tmeanI’mnotstrong,”Reinadeclareddecisively,unwavering.
Icleared mythroat, a weakattemptto breakthe tensionbetweenthem SomethingI’d become accustomed to doingno mattertheMoorememberthatstoodoneithersideofme.Reinahadalreadylostherbrother, again,toSeth’spersistence.She didn’tneedherheartlesscousinfurtheringthedamage
“We’ve beenoperatingunder the assumptionthatpower sharingwas aboutvulnerability. Possible onlybecause ofthe
Tomoe
initialprotectionspellIputinplace.”
I paused. Given the current state of our family and the shattered state of Duluth, I’d been putting all my faith in the universefortheproblemtobeoneoffacevalue Wedidn’ttrusteachother Andtobevulnerable,onemusttrust Butthatwas onlypartoftheproblem.
It’dbeenanuneventful night Nothingoutofthenorm,our typical Fridayatthetavern Astupidsmileplasteredacross myheated, drunkcheeks as Ipeered around the table. Consider me shitfounded whenIrealized itwas the firsttime thatI’d beenhappyinyears Truly happy ThatwasanemotionIhadn’texperiencedsinceTheBefore ThatnightI’drushedhomeand protectedmyfamilytheonlywayIknewhow.
Inolongerpracticedpaganism.Ihadn’tinyears,hadgivenitupafterI’dplayedwithdarknessforatouchtoolong.Part ofmestillbelievedIcursedmyselfwiththesestupidvisions,myconsequencebeingwatchingmyfamilydie Afterall,itwas myvisionsthattrappedmeinsidemyhead,leavingmeunabletohelptheminrealtime.
Iwouldn’tloseanotherfamily ThatnightI’dtoldmyselfnocostwouldbetoohighifitmeantprotectingthem Keeping themsafe.SoIboundthemtomymagic,mypower,tohelpkeepthemalive.Alifeline.I’dbeencarefulnottotieittomyactual lifeline I’dsimplyprovidedthemwithextrastrength,extrapower
Theirmagicfedoffmine,asucculenttoaneternalflame.Itwasn’tmuch.Infact,ifmymagicstoppedrunningthroughmy veins,it’dbeofnohelpatall.Still,it’dbe enough tokeepthemsafeiftheyneededanextrasparktodefendthemselves.
Thenagain,howmuchcouldithavehelpedifJaxhadstilldied?WhateverI’ddone,ithadn’tbeenenoughtostopthat I’dfelthimgo,buthismagichadremained.Asmallkernelthatrefusedtofade.
“There’ssomethingIleftout,”Iadmitted
Everyoneturnedtofaceme,andthesizeoftheroomtightenedundertheirscrutiny.Sloanclosedinonme,movingaround ReinaonlytobestoppedinhertracksbyAlexiares.SomethingI’dseenhimdoalotsincewe’darrived.Anotheroddityweall pretendednottonotice,buteveryonedid.AlexiareswastheonepersoninthisdamnedplacethatsilencedSloan.Onewould almostsay,scaredher.
I didn’t know muchabout his past, hadn’t givena shit enoughto ask, let alone prytoo deep withmymagic All that matteredtomewasthathewasnowonourside,andallIcoulddowashopeitstayedthatway.Rileyhadn’tcomealongwith us onthis adventure, buthe’d be infor some competitionfor Amaia’s shadow whenwe gotback There was one place you couldcountonAlexiaresbeingtheselastfewweeks,andthatwasatAmaia’sside.
Perhapsthatwaswheretherootofmyangerstemmedfrom,whyIletitlingerfornearlyamonth.Onlyoneofuswould diehappy,knowinganintenselove.Theunderstandingofcompletion,ofhavingahomenomatterwhereyouwent,aslongas youwenttogether.Atleastthat’sallIcouldseerightnow.
Ibracedmyself,readyfortherecoil “Aboutmypractice,aboutpaganism”
Afewpeoplewinced,thethoughtofitstillmakingthemuncomfortable.Notthereligiousaspect,orthepracticeofit,but ratheratthefactofmoresci-fishitbeingpossible Beingtrue
“ThespellIusedhadan…extracomponenttoit.”
“Meaning?”Reinaleanedforwardinherseat,thescientistinherintrigued.
“It wasn’t just a protectionspell I used blood as the binder It strengthened the effectiveness of the spell I think,” I muttered.
Secondspassedbeforeanyonespokeagain Iknew ReinaandAmaiaweremullingthings over,buttherestofthem yeah,theywereprobablythinkingoftheclosestcrosstoburnmeon.
“Whydoyousoundhesitantaboutthat?”Sloanasked,herhandstoyingwiththematchbookinherhand
“Because I didn’t write the spell down.” I said, “It was my own creation, a mix of different practices found in my research.Icalledondifferentculturesthroughouttime Aztec,Mayan,Roman,Egyptian,Greek.Evenmodernpractices.”
Recognition passed over Amaia’s eyes Somewhere inside her know-it-all mind, she was running through whatever historical facts she had fromeachculture. “The books thatwere scattered across your roombefore we left, whenyouwere tryingtochannelmoreofthelabvision Youwerestudyingsomething Whatwasit?”
Inodded,tuggingonthesleevesofmyblackhoodie.“Yeah.Iwastryingtofigureoutwhichpartofthespellallowed this tohappen Thenhowtostrengthenit”
“I’m still not seeing the problem here. You can’t channel a vision and watch a replay?” Sloan’s voice erupted, the impatiencecreepingbackintohermonotonevoice.
“Magic has its limitations The magic that runs through our veins, it’s natural Well, natural in the sense that it only amplifiestheelementsoftheuniverse.Reliesonthem.Thesamemagicthatpractitionersovertimemoldedandusedatamuch smaller scale throughouttime” Theyall stared atme like Ihad four heads Irolled myeyes, dumbingitdownto whatthey could understand, “Witchcraft. But dark magic, bloodletting, that’s not natural. It’s forbidden, and thus the universe has consequencesforitsuse.Mycurrentlimitationbeingoneofthem.”
“Thelargerproblemisshecan’trememberwhichpracticegotushere.Sinceshedidn’twriteitdown,she’llhavetotest themouttoseewhichonesticks.”Amaiaadded.
Reina’sknottedbrownhairfellinfrontofherface.“Idon’tgetit;yougotitrightthefirsttrythelasttimeyoudidit.”
“Ididn’tknowifit worked thelasttimeIdidit.ItwassomethingIdidinamanic-drunkenrush.Icanbarelyrecallthe nightitself IwassospookedafterIdidit,scaredI’dcursedmyfamilyonceagain Itrasheditall Haven’tpracticedsince”
“You’reaboutto,”Sloancommanded.“Whatresearchandresourcesdoyouneed?”
Alwaystothepoint Relentless Whatevergotthejobdone Everyinteractionwe’dhadwithhersincewe’dbeenfreed fromourlittlecellandplacedintoourindividualoneshadbeentransactional.Whichwasfinebymeconsideringthestenchof tobaccooffherwasunbearableinclosequarters Eatingmealsaroundherwhenourdayswerelongwasupthereonthelistof worstexperiencesI’dbeenthrough.Ever.AndI’vebeenthroughalotofshit.
Notonlywasthestench,andsight,ofhernauseating,butsheinsistedonhavingapre-andpost-mealsmoke.Ifthiswar didn’tkillher,herlungswould Iwouldn’ttellherthatthough,notwhenshetreatedmysisterthewaythatshedid
“Ifthisistrue,Tomoe,ifyoucanfigurethisout,ourarmieswillbeunstoppable,”Amaiasaid,aslygrinteasingtheside ofherlips
She was alreadydoingthe math. The face ofa general stood before me. She’d made itclear thatshe was capable of doing anything to win this war Seth’s departure had been nothing but a casualty of war to her Instead of receding into a depressive, drunkenstate we’d feared her slippinginto, she’d emerged the nextmorningunfazed. Determined to end anyone withinCovertProvincethatsupportedMooreandhiswar. And Seth,she’dsaid.Forwiththisbetrayalandthecertaintyofhis roleinJax’sdeath,Sethwasdeadtoher Hadonlysignedhisdeathcertificatethemomenthe’dwalkedaway Isighed,shakingmyhead.“EvenifIfigureoutthespell,Icanonlyperformafewoftheritualsmyself.We’llneedmore powerthanwhatIhave Afucktonmore”
We’dnever be able toconnectanentire army.Thatwas somethingevenatmynovice level Ididn’tthinkconceivable. Whatwaspossible,however,wasconnectingsoldierswithinunits.Now that wouldbegame-changing.Maybeevenenoughto winthewarbeforeittrulybegun,beforewelosttoomuch.
“Okay,sohow dowedothat?Can’tbetoohard.”Reinasaid,thathintofoptimismstill alivesomewheredeepinside her “We’llneedmorepractitioners,”Imumbled,doingthementalmath,“peoplecomfortablewithbloodletting.”
Theyallstaredatmewithstupid,emptyeyes Ihuffed,theirfacesaskingme, what’s the issue?
“It’sfrownedupon,”Isaid,making‘woowoo’handsatthem.“Darkmagic.” Reinatookasteptowardme,hopeinhereyes.“Therehastobesomeonewilling,andI’msurethatsomeonewillknow someone.”
“That’shelpful.”Sloanmocked,“Wecan’texactlyplaceanadinthelocalnewspaper.”
“Imayknowsomeone”
EveryheadintheroomswiveledinAlexiares’direction. Of course he does.
“There’sanundergroundnetwork,”hesaid,unfazed “Somethingcomparabletowhattheblackmarketmightoffer” “What?Soweplaceanorder?We’renotsearchingforobjects,we’relookingfor people.Peoplewearen’tevenentirely surestillexistorwillcomeoutofhidinglikethisone,”Sloan’swordswereacidic.
Amaiaflashedaglareinwarning,daringhertocontinue Creditgivenwhencreditisdue She’dtakenupforReinaandI, despiteourdifferencesasoflate.Itwasnotedandsomewhatappreciated.
Icould see how she and Sloanhad beenbestfriends Theyfed offeachother’s energy Their equal levels ofintensity inducedanever-endingspiralofchaos.Pushingeachothertoworkharder,tomakebetterdecisions.Sloanwascutthroat,but thesadthingwas,shewasoftenright AswasAmaia,tomydispleasure Realizationsetin.“Morethanobjectsaresoldintheblackmarket.They’resellingus?”Imumbled.
“Notselling.”Alexiaresshookhishead,hisbrightbrowneyesglowinginthedimlight.“They’rerunningthedamnthing. Brujas ”
There wasn’t muchto sayafter Alexiares’little revelation. The onlywayfor us to move forward was to wait until a connectionwasestablishedandhegotanideaonhowmanypractitionershecouldgather. If hecould,otherwisetheplan wouldfail.Grosslyenough,Ihadfaithinhim.
Apersonasnotoriousashimdidn’tgetbyfarwithouttheresourcestohelpthem.Therewasalsothefactthathewould dowhateverittooktokeeptheonlyfriendhe’deverhad,Tiago’sbrothersafe Tohim,therewasnooptionbuttosucceed “Tomoe,keepworkingonthe fine details.Iexpecttohave somethingtangible soon.Amaia,figure outthe rest.” Sloan commanded, her voice dead as she turned to walkoutthe room She waved her armatme onher wayout, brushingme off nonchalantly.
Her Tinkerers took one glance around at who they’d remain alone with if they stayed. Their gazes hovered between AlexiaresandI,beforescramblingafterher.Notthatthey’dbemuchsaferwithher.Ihatedtoadmitit,butIwasn’tsurewho myfriendhadbecome.
Iclenchedmyfists Somehow,I’dbecomesomeonewhoansweredtoher,yethertroopsnowansweredtome We were thereasonherpeoplehadstoppeddyingbythemasses. We weretheonesstrengtheningtheirforcesandtheirdefenses,sharing whatknowledgewehadtomaketheirpeoplesafer Noneofthatchangedhowshelookeddownonus Madesureweknewshe thoughtusresponsibleforbringingthistohersideoftheworld,forherpeoplefalling.Fairenough,wekindawere.
Alexiaresbrieflyclosedhishandovermineinsupport.Aweirdsenseofcalmwashedovermeinresponse.Iwashere todoajob,nottomakefriends Fewthingsmatteredasidefromkeepingpeoplesafe,preventingthedevilincarnatefromtaking overthisland.FailingmeantIwouldbesingle-handedlyresponsibleforlettingwhatremainedleftofsocietyfalltothehands ofevil Therewasnofreedom,nopeace,inagovernmentthatoperatedofftheabsenceofchoice
Therestwasbullshit.Ididn’tneedrespect,peopletolikeme,orhell,evenacknowledgethehelpI’dbeenproviding,to
Amaia
getthejobdone.ReinaandTomoestaredatmestone-faced,theirshouldersslouchedindefeatastheyawaitedtheirorders.
“Ifyouneedanyonetobounceideasfrom,comefindme,”Isaid;Tomoecontinuedstaringatmeblankly.“Reina,focus ongatheringmaterialssheneedstoperformthespell” “Ritual,”Tomoegroundout.
“Ritual,”Icorrected,“Alexiares,I’massumingthere’ssomeoneintheareayou’veestablishedaconnectionwith?” Henoddedatme,hisbrowneyeslockingonminethenslidtomylips.Thesamelevel ofamusementfixedonhisface thathadalwayslaidtherewhenIfellintogeneralmode Except,beforeithadbeenmocking Tingedwithdisrespect Now it mademydamnheartflutter.Ipushedthefeelingaway,thiswasn’tthetime.Rightnow,Ihadtofocusonthemission keeping peoplesafe.Free.
Againstmyowndesires,theresponsibilityIhadoverthirty-thousandmen,women,andchildrenofMontereyCompound hadshotuptoinclude the entiretyofDuluthovernight.Sloanhadexecutedthe former general whenhe’ddeclinedtofollow several ofmyrecommendations His refusal to workwithme led to fiftyoftheir menfallingto a massive herd ofupgraded Pansies. He’s outlived his usefulness,myfriendhadsaid,emotionabsentinheralmond-shapedeyes.
Her heart had turned cold throughout the years, though I suspected most of it had come from the last few months Decidingwholivedandwhodiedcouldfuckapersonup,Igotittoowell.Wewereallsusceptibletodoingterriblethingsfor thepeoplewelove.
Inallfairness,hisinabilitytoacceptawomanasamilitaryadvisorhadbeenonlyasmallbliponhislonglistoffuckups asageneral.
“Ineedtosendoutsomelogisticswiththenextwaveofemissariestodepart Therestofmydaywillbespenttryingto fixwhat Icanoftheir mess ofa military. Youknow where to find me,” Isaid, waitingfor themto object, a tendencythey developedtowardnearlyeverythingIsaidthesedays.
TheonlyresponseIreceivedwasuncomfortablesilence.
“Anythingelse?”Reinaasked,refusingtomeetmyeye.
“Yeah,one more thing,” Ipaused,hesitanttopose the questionatthe tipofmytongue “Has anyone sensedSethtryto connect?”
Acollectivechorusof,“No,”wentaroundtheroom Alexiares’responsewasn’tnecessaryasSethhadneverenteredhis mindbefore,butwithus,itwassonatural;itwaspossiblehecouldbetherewithoutusknowing.
ReinaandTomoewerelearningwhathadsuckedthedesiretoliveoutofmeinthemonthsthatfollowedinJax’spassing. Thedaythatyoulosesomeone,thedaythatpersonisnolongercapableofholdingspaceinyourlife,that’snottheworstday. No,theworstiswhenyou’releftwithnothingbuttimetothink,toletyourmindwanderandconvoluteaseriesofwhat ifs.The worstareallthedaystheystaygone Wherethepossibilityofformingnewmemoriessomehowbecomesimpossible
“Good,keepyourguardup.”
KeepingamentalshielduparoundourmindswastheonlywaywecouldbecertainthatSethwouldn’tintrude Muchof ourbareminimum,half-assedplanreliedonmakingsurehedidn’tgetaglimpseofanythingimportantthatmaybediscussedin hismentalpresence.Hecouldn’tmind-read,butifhewasalreadyconnectedtoyou,hadtalkedtoyoumind-to-mindinthepast, hisrareScholarabilitygrantedhimaccesstowhateverwasgoingoninyourcurrentconversation Likeplacingaphonedown againstyourchesttohaveaprivatediscussionwithoutpressingmute.Itwasmuffled,butifhefocused,putsomerealenergy behindtheeffort,hecouldputthepiecestogether
Idoubted he’d attempt it; though, under the influence ofhis father, who knew. He understood mythought process, the checklistIwould go throughonce he left Our defenses would be up After all, he’d beenthe one to trainus to be resistant againsthisgiftallthoseyearsago.
“Aye, aye, General.” Tomoe snarled before turningonher heels, Reina’s mousybrownhair flowingas she followed closebehind
Alexiarescreptupbehindme,hishandfallingtothesmallofmyback,thesensationsendingashockthroughmyspine. Somanysecrets,somanylies Somuchbetrayal,fromallsides Tomoehadbetrayedourtrusttoo,butsomehow,thathadbeen aneasierpilltoswallowforReina.
IguessIcouldunderstandthat Tomoe’sbetrayalhadformedwithbothfearandloveinmind Lovehadblindedher For me,itwasn’tassimple.Myfriendsdidn’twanttobeprotected.They’dneveraskedthatofme.
I’dstolentheirabilitytomakeachoiceformonths,letthemformnewmemoriesthattheymaynothavewantedtoform hadtheybeenthewisertomysuspicions Possiblychangedthecourseoftheirentirelives
My choice had changed the course of at least one aspect of Tomoe’s. Seth’s too. Maybe he’d still be here had I confrontedhiminamorecontrolledenvironment,givenhimtheopportunitytoredeemhimself
Butthatwasn’twhatwas bestfor the people ofThe Compound,andthatwas somethingIremindedmyselftoease the paineveryday. Mydecisionmaynothave beenthe bestfor myfamily, butithad beenthe bestfor mypeople. Withoutthe choicesI’dmade,SethmayhavebeenabletorallysoldiersfromhiscavalryandothersaroundTheCompoundtosupporthis cause.And that wassomethingIcouldnothave.
