The happiness decree

THE HAPPINESS

DECREE

Illustrations by Veridiana scarpelli

THE HAPPINESS

DECREE

Illustrations by Veridiana scarpelli

Copyright © Instituto Rubem Alves, 2016 All rights reserved to editora ftd s . a .

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Director Ricardo Tavares de Oliveira Publisher Isabel Lopes Coelho Foreign rights Tassia Oliveira foreignrights@ftd.com.br

Once upon a time there was a king with a

very good heart but a very foolish head. His heart was good because what he most desired was that all who lived in his kingdom, children, men, women and old people, always felt happy.

And his head was foolish because he believed that he, the king, had to power to make all of the heart’s desires come true through decrees.

So, for his subjects to always be happy, his foolish head came up with the following decree: “Article 1: it is decreed that all people in my kingdom shall be happy.

Article 2: It is decreed that all sorrows shall be banned.”

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In order to work, decrees need to be regulated. The regulations of an article explain how that article shall be abided by.

For this reason, the king called upon his ministers and ordered: “you must regulate the Happiness Decree”.

The Ministers rushed to follow the orders of the king. And they thought: “If all sorrows are to be banned, the first thing to do is to name those things that cause sorrow.”

So, they set out to make a list of all the things that cause sorrow and should be banned.

One of the ministers recalled that there were many songs that make your heart feel sad.

Then, another minister said to the other, in a low voice: “Isn’t it strange how people like to listen to songs that make them sad? Even me”, he added in a hushed voice, still, because he was afraid of being heard. “I cry every time I hear ‘the little Waltz’ by Chico Buarque. I like the sadness of ‘the Little Waltz’, that is the reason why I never tire of hearing it…”

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One of the ministers noted that sunsets made one feel sad, as well as thrushes when they sing at the end of the day. It was decided, then, that besides banning the works of art cited above, sunsets would also be banned, just as the thrush and its song.

“But what about wakes?”, asked one of the ministers. “It is not possible to ban people from dying… and in wakes, there is always so much crying…” It was then that one of them, well-versed in Literature, remembered that Guimarães Rosa, an expert in the customs of the bushland, had said that in the bush every wake was a party. They concluded, then, that people’s cultural tradition itself gave approval for the transformation of sad wakes into wakes full of joy. That is how wakes with mourners, crying and laments were banned.

Wakes would be transformed into merry gatherings of friends where they ate snacks and sweets and “drank to the dead”. There was nothing better to shoo off sadness and produce happiness than a few sips of liquor…

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“We are finished with the list of things that cause sadness,” said the minister that presided over the meeting. “We now need to make a list of things that make you happy. If things that make you sad are banned, then things that make you happy will be obligatory.

In the Kingdom of Happiness, happiness is obligatory. Whoever is not happy will be breaking the king’s decree. And whoever breaks the king’s decree shall be punished.”

One of the ministers became frightened: “But, your Excellency, punishment brings sadness… and if sadness is forbidden…”. The president was not perturbed, because he had already come up with a solution. “When your Excellency comes with the corn, I already have the fuba cake”, he observed, disdainfully. “There will be special punishments, punishments that provoke laughter. Sad people will undergo tickling and joking sessions, sessions that will only end when all tears and sad faces are substituted by laughs and cackles.”

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They started, then, to make a list of things that brought happiness and would be obligatory.

Parties. At parties, one just had to be happy. At parties, those who went around with a sad face had better watch out… Barbecues with beer, feasting and banquets. Drinks brought joy to body and soul: cocktails, caipirinhas, caipiroskas, beer, wine, gintonic, whisky, and in a special way, champagne that burst open with a pop. Dancing, yes, but only if it was fast and acrobatic. Slow dances with faces glued to each other produced melancholy…

There shall be sound, preferably coming from big carnival floats, only at a very loud volume.

The volume of the sound on carnival floats leaves no space for inner life, which is the place where sadness lives. No serious conversations. In their place, jokes. From an early age, children shall be educated in the art of telling jokes and in laughing at jokes. Also, the national anthem of the Kingdom of Happiness was altered to suit the king’s decree and ended up sounding a lot like the songs of the “Mamonas Assassinas”, which made everyone laugh… The anthem over, instead of clapping, everyone had to laugh. Comedy films, especially the slapstick ones. Fireworks. Streamers. Confetti. And presents. Nothing gives more joy than presents.

And that is how the decree was published and regulated.

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