Echo Magazine - Arizona LGBTQ Lifestyle - September 2020

INSIDE:

Learn how Krewe of Hope offers COVID-19 relief Election 2020: Meet Arizona's LGBTQ Legislative Caucus

PLUS:

Key players: The Mighty Wurlitzer pipe organists of Organ Stop Pizza

JOEY POLLARI

Performing music as Odd Comfort, this actor and multi-talented artist releases a record LGBTQ NEWS, VIEWS AND ENTERTAINMENT | Vol. 31, #12 | Issue 732 | September 2020 | COMPLIMENTARY

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INSIDE THIS

ISSUE

Courtesy of Project Roots.

Issue 732 | Vol. 31, #12 | August 2020

NEWS 8

Editor’s Note

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Publisher’s Note

12 News Briefs

COMMUNITY 32 Without Reservations 34 Opening Nights 36 Bands 40 Recordings 42 Between the Covers 44 Talking Bodies 46 Not That You Asked

ON THE COVER Joey Pollari. Photo by Sam McGuire,

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Implementing change from the ground up — Bridget Pettis steps away from the WNBA to help the community The player, coach, and executive recently launched Project Roots AZ, a nonprofit organization dedicated to using educational programs to inform community members about growing food.

Michelle Talsma Everson has the story.

with David Gangel, stylist and Erik Adrian Santiago, art director.

INSIDE:

Learn how Krewe of Hope offers COVID-19 relief Election 2020: Meet Arizona's LGBTQ Legislative Caucus

PLUS:

Key players: The Mighty Wurlitzer pipe organists of Organ Stop Pizza

JOEY POLLARI

Performing music as Odd Comfort, this actor and multi-talented artist releases a record LGBTQ NEWS, VIEWS AND ENTERTAINMENT | Vol. 31, #12 | Issue 732 | September 2020 | COMPLIMENTARY

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Ask Brian: How can I reinvent myself?

“Coming Out” of COVID-19

Current Arizona State Senator Tony Navarette (District 30).

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Kill bills: Arizona’s LGBTQ Legislative Caucus fights for your rights Niki D’Andrea talks to members of the caucus about their efforts and how the community can help.

Krewe of Hope is a blessing for homeless, restaurants, and community alike Buddy Early spotlights Arana Wolin and Anne Titelbaum, who are providing COVID-19 relief through their double-sided mission to support local businesses and feed a homeless community.

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(L to R) Brett Valiant and Lew Williams.

Organ Stop Pizza: Where a one-manband is an entire orchestra

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Michelle Talsma Everson chats with Brett Valiant and Lew Williams. The venue’s two professional organists dish on life behind the keys of the Mighty Wurlitzer pipe organ.

16 STEM toys to boost kids’ knowledge, understanding, and interest in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics This array of educational toys stimulates and teaches critical thinking and problem-solving skills.

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Joey Pollari byMark Stablein.

Cover Story: Actor Joey Pollari is known for his mainstream queer roles and now, his music

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Apps for the win!

Kimberly Blaker looks at 11 different apps to help simplify parenting and caregiving.

Timothy Rawles talks to the actor who gained popularity in the gay rom-com Love, Simon about his foray into music, including the release of a new record.

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EDITOR’S NOTE

By Amy Young

Y

ou’ve made it to page 8. If you’re a front-to-back reader, I don’t want to spoil anything for you. Go ahead to page 9 to read some really exciting Echo news. Okay, you’re back. Wow, right?

It stands to reason — with 2020 being as much an agent of chaos as a year of challenge and change — that our magazine might find itself in a blender, being shaken and stirred into a newly-flavored cocktail, or, mocktail, if that’s your preference.

Yes, Publisher Bill Orovan has decided to say farewell, allowing a new team to take ownership of this magazine that has been an integral part of the community for more than three decades. The current staff remains in place and we are excited to continue developing compelling content and telling important stories. Right now, we’re at the stage where things are in transition, so look for more updates about Echo’s future in our next issue — that’s also the Arts issue.

Our September issue’s theme is Back In Action. September usually signifies a long goodbye to summer and a lead-in to a new kind of activities. COVID-19 still has something to say about the way we’re doing things but there is plenty of motion as we move toward the fall season.

Voting is a subject that has our minds spinning here at Echo. Given the current state of the country, with so much in disarray, it creates a couple prominent feelings about voting: inspired is one, futile is another. I encourage you that if you feel the latter, to please try and remember that your voice is important. Organizations like Equality Arizona and One Community are

both among the great voter resources we have in our region.

This issue finds Niki D’Andrea introducing readers to Arizona’s LGBTQ Legislative Caucus, who work to battle discriminatory bills and protect LGBTQ rights.

Two local groups are featured this month for their outstanding community efforts.

Krewe of Hope is helping relieve some of the COVID-19 stress by supporting local businesses and feeding members of the homeless population. Buddy Early talked to this dynamic team.

Project Roots AZ is Bridget Pettis’ nonprofit. The WNBA player and coach is using educational programs to teach people about growing food and the importance of sustainability.

That’s Joey Pollari on the cover. You might recognize him from Love, Simon, if you dabble in sweet rom-com’s. His acting resume extends beyond that streaming megahit and now he’s releasing a full-length recording of music under stage name Odd Comfort.

About Men is the title and the single “Fickle” is already out there getting attention.

We are still seeking COVID-19 stories and are happy to be an information resource if you need assistance during this time. Please email editor@echomag.com for either. Stay safe.

Amy Young is the managing editor of Echo Magazine. A longtime journalist, her work has appeared numerous publications, regional to international. Please contact her at editor@echomag.com.

LGBTQ NEWS, VIEWS AND ENTERTAINMENT PUBLISHER: Bill Orovan ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER: Bill Gemmill EDITORIAL MANAGING EDITOR: Amy Young CONTRIBUTORS: Chris Azzopardi Alison Bailin Batz Kimberly Blaker Grace Bolyard Edward Castro Niki D'Andrea Jenna Duncan Buddy Early Michelle Talsma Everson Brian Falduto Jason Kron Jeff Kronenfeld

Laura Latzko Logan Lowrey-Rasmussen Tuesday Mahrle Judy McGuire Ashley Naftule David-Elijah Nahmod Tia Norris Timothy Rawles Tom Reardon Romeo San Vicente Terri Schlichenmeyer

ART DEPARTMENT PHOTOGRAPHY: nightfuse.com.

ADVERTISING DIRECTOR OF SALES AND MARKETING: Ashlee James ECHO READERSHIP: 50,000 SUBSCRIPTIONS: $29/year ACE PUBLISHING, INC.

MAILING ADDRESS: P.O. Box 16630 Phoenix, AZ 85011-6630 PHONE: 602-266-0550 EMAIL: manager@echomag.com Copyright © 2016 • ISSN #1045-2346

MEMBER:

Echo Magazine is published by ACE Publishing, Inc. Echo is a registered trademark of ACE Publishing, Inc. All rights reserved.

Written permission must be obtained in advance for partial or complete reproduction of any advertising material contained therein. Opinions expressed therein are not necessarily those of the publisher or staff. ACE Publishing, Inc. does not assume responsibility for claims by its advertisers or advice columnists. Publication of a name, photograph of an individual or organization in articles, advertisements or listings is not to be construed as an indication of the sexual orientation, unless such orientation is specifically stated. Manuscripts or other materials submitted remain the property of ACE Publishing, Inc. 8

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Bill Orovan (Left).

still put out a complete magazine just two weeks later (we were bi-weekly then), and raised $2,000 at an impromptu party to thank the fire department for their services.

As your voice of the community, Echo has been both influential and informative in politics, social issues, charities, finances, the arts, and every other facet of interest to our readers. With so many worthwhile charities and other important LGBTQ organizations, we are proud to have contributed over $2 million to improve the quality of life of many, many Arizonans.

Passing the torch: Echo Publisher Bill Orovan bids farewell to the magazine

By Bill Orovan overflow the convention center at a special meeting, the largest crowd ever for a city council meeting. (20 years later we finally got most of the rights we were asking for.)

T

his issue marks the beginning of our 32nd year of continuous publication, quite an accomplishment for a LGBTQoriented magazine.

From our humble beginnings out of a tiny apartment on McDowell, we have come a long way with a record our community can be very proud of. We were the first LGBTQ publication in the Southwest to print in full color, the first with glossy pages, and the first with perfect binding.

We did a three-part interview with the police chief when police relations with our community were quite tenuous. We joined the Arizona Press Club as an openly LGBTQ publication and caused quite a stir, but the next year our Jeff Ofstedahl took the highest honor a magazine of our size could get. We were the pioneer LGBTQ company to join the Phoenix Chamber of Commerce, while we helped to get the first LGBTQ Chamber in the whole country registered with the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, right here in Phoenix. When our community saw a chance to improve our rights with the City of Phoenix, we put out five special edition ‘yellow sheets’ to encourage 5,000 people to FEATURE STORY

We had a very successful run with Echo Night at the Movies, we had large crowds for Echo Day at the Renaissance Festival, Echo Day (and night) at Big Surf, and many years of our famous Swimsuit Contest, where we raised over $40,000 for various charities.

We have had a booth at every Pride event and every Rainbows Festival since their beginnings. When one of the Pride Festivals got destroyed by a micro-burst, Echo raised a substantial amount of money so that they could continue to put on another festival the following year. And, when Echo’s beautiful office was arson burned to the ground, we

Being Publisher of Echo has been a real privilege for me, but now it is time to give the reins to a younger generation. I am so grateful to have worked with a marvelous staff all these years, and am pleased to say that Amy Young, our talented Managing Editor, and Ashlee Singleton, our Director of Sales and Marketing, will remain to make sure that Echo keeps the high standards that you have been used to. And Bill Gemmill, our Associate Publisher who has been the driving force of the publication for the last five years, will also remain to help steer the magazine’s future ... but, from his new home in Iowa! (Since the pandemic began here in March, we certainly are seeing a new era in communications.)

I especially would like to thank all our faithful readers and advertisers, without whom we could not have existed. And a great big thanks to all our writers, contributors, photographers, delivery people, cleaning crew, volunteers, interns, and all our friends who have pitched in over the years when we needed those extra hands.

So, with this issue I wish you all a fond farewell. The new publisher and staff will introduce themselves to you in the October issue, which should be hitting the stands in mid-September. They are highly qualified and seasoned hands — I wouldn’t leave you with anything less.

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SEPTEMBER 2020

9

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NEWS BRIEFS

and we must vote because our lives depend on it, otherwise what we fought for 55 years ago will be in vain.”

“Latinos are disproportionately affected

by Covid-19 and that makes our communities especially vulnerable. We’re the secondlargest voting bloc in this election, so we need to focus on increasing our efforts to ensure Latino voters are able to cast their ballots safely during this election,” said Nathalie Rayes, Latino Victory Foundation President & CEO. “The results of this survey will help guide Latino Victory’s and our partner organizations’ work to engage and mobilize Latino voters in this unprecedented election.”

Human Rights Campaign Foundation & HIT Strategies release research on voters of color & vote by mail Courtesy of HRC

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n Aug. 6, the Human Rights Campaign Foundation and HIT Strategies released the first results of a national survey of voters of color, including LGBTQ voters of color, to determine voter sentiment in regard to vote by mail. Conducted in partnership with major advocacy organizations, including Latino Victory Foundation, the NAACP, UnidosUS, and Woke Vote, this survey shows key commonalities — as well as critical differences — in how voters from different communities view the current voting climate.

in the future of our democracy.”

“Communities of color, being disproportionately impacted by this pandemic, are seeking safe and secure alternatives to make their voices heard in this election,” said Terrance Woodbury, HIT Strategies. “This research reveals the real and perceived barriers that voters of color have toward voting by mail, and the interventions that can be taken to overcome those barriers.”

Key takeaways from the research include: 76% of POC voters think the coronavirus crisis will affect who votes in the 2020 election, and 73% of POC voters think the protests following the death of George Floyd will affect who votes in the 2020 election.

“Part of increasing voter turnout and engagement means meeting people where they are,” said Dejuana Thompson, Founder of Woke Vote. “We need to make sure voters are both empowered and excited to cast their ballots. The results of this survey provide meaningful pointers for how we can help voters navigate these uncertain times to safely and successfully cast their ballots.”

68% of POC voters will either vote in person early or by mail, including 59% of APPI voters stating that voting by mail is their current voting preference.

Also on that date — the anniversary of the Voting Rights Act — Human Rights Campaign Foundation President Alphonso David, NAACP President Derrick Johnson, UnidosUS President & CEO Janet Murguía, and Latino Victory Foundation President and CEO Nathalie Rayes discussed the results of this survey in a panel moderated by Jamal Simmons, CBS News analyst and host of #ThisisFYI on IGTV.

“This year’s general election will present some unique obstacles. Our findings show how we can work to prepare and rise to this historic moment, and voting by mail is an important tool in doing so,” said UnidosUS President and CEO Janet Murguía. “The Latino vote will be a decisive factor in the electoral equation and we at UnidosUS, along with our sister organizations, are committed to making sure Latinos and all communities have the information and tools needed to make their voices heard in November.”

80% of POC voters, including 84% of Black voters and 80% of LGBTQ POC voters, favor allowing all voters the option of vote by mail or absentee ballot in this year’s election.

“Voters across the country this fall will be facing unprecedented challenges in how to safely make their voices heard in the pivotal election ahead,” said Human Rights Campaign Foundation President Alphonso David. “As these results show, voters are hopeful, resilient and ready to cast their votes this November — from the ballot box to the mailbox. Along with our partners, the Human Rights Campaign Foundation looks forward to educating and empowering voters in how they can safely and effectively have their say

“The 55th Anniversary of The Voting Rights Act reminds us that the right to vote has not come easy and was hard-fought,” said Derrick Johnson, President and CEO, NAACP. “As we live through this COVID-19 pandemic, it is critical that the governmental agencies responsible have the resources they need to create a safe and fair election environment without risking lives. The research tells us that in our communities, we need multiple options for every voter to cast a ballot by mail or in person. This year is vital for elections,

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75% of POC voters, including 76% of Black voters and 79% of POC LGBTQ voters, are more likely to vote by mail in November if we still don’t have a cure or vaccine for coronavirus.

In terms of voters’ feelings towards the November election, the highest rated feeling was hopeful, at 34% of those surveyed.

The initial survey included a sample of over 800 individuals from across the U.S, including Florida, Wisconsin, Texas, and Georgia. This research is still ongoing, and results will continue to be released through November.

About HRC: As the largest civil rights organization working to achieve equality for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer Americans, the Human Rights Campaign represents a force of more than 3 million members and supporters nationwide — all committed to making HRC’s vision a reality.

HRC envisions a world where lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer people are embraced as full members of society at home, at work and in every community.

NEWS

NEWS BRIEFS

Transgender teens bring class action lawsuit challenging Arizona Medicaid’s categorical exclusion of surgery for Transgender people Courtesy of the National Center for Lesbian Rights

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n August 6, the National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR) and the National Health Law Program (NHeLP), along with co-counsel King & Spalding LLP and Perkins Coie LLP, filed a class-action lawsuit challenging Arizona Medicaid’s categorical exclusion for surgical treatment for gender dysphoria.

The named plaintiffs, D.H. and John Doe, are transgender teenagers who require male chest reconstruction surgery to treat their gender dysphoria. Arizona’s refusal to cover this medically necessary treatment violates medical standards of care and is causing D.H. and John to experience serious harms.

The lawsuit alleges that Arizona Medicaid’s categorical exclusion violates the Medicaid Act, the Affordable Care Act, and the Equal Protection Clause of the U.S. Constitution.

D.H. and John have also filed a Motion for Preliminary Injunction seeking a court order requiring Arizona Medicaid to cover their surgery immediately to prevent the irreparable harm they will experience by a further delay of this critical care.

“Every day I must wear a very constrictive chest binder to flatten my chest just to function,” said Plaintiff D.H. “But wearing the binder for any extended period of time is NEWS

painful. The binder is so tight that I cannot breathe fully, making it impossible to be physically active and do the things I love, like dance and theater. That has taken a serious toll on my mental health and I have struggled with severe depression and anxiety as a result of being denied needed care.”

“Coverage determinations must be made by relying on the prevailing standards of care and the experience of health care experts in the field,” said Brent Ray, Partner at King & Spalding LLP. “Arizona’s continued enforcement of its categorical exclusion has no medical basis.”

“Categorically excluding surgical treatment for gender dysphoria impermissibly discriminates against transgender people.” said Asaf Orr, Senior Staff Attorney and Director of the Transgender Youth Project at the National Center for Lesbian Rights.

“There is no legitimate justification for Arizona’s refusal to provide this critical care to transgender Medicaid recipients. Instead, excluding that care creates unnecessary barriers that prevent transgender young people from thriving in every aspect of their lives and can cause lifelong harms.”

The National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR) is a national legal organization committed to advancing the human and civil rights of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer community through litigation, public policy advocacy, and public education. Since its founding, NCLR has maintained a longstanding commitment to racial and economic justice and the LGBTQ community’s most vulnerable. https://www. nclrights.org

“By accepting federal funds for Medicaid, Arizona agreed to cover medically necessary health care for young people, but it has failed to keep that promise for transgender young people,” said Abbi Coursolle, Senior Attorney at the National Health Law Program. “Male chest reconstruction surgery is essential to the health and wellbeing of transgender young people and federal law requires Arizona to cover it.”

National Health Law Program (NHeLP) protects and advances the health rights of low-income and underserved individuals and families. NHeLP advocates, educates and litigates at the federal and state levels. Our lawyers and policy analysts stand up for the rights of the millions of people who struggle to access affordable, quality health care. We are guided by the belief – a challenge – that each generation should live better than the last. www.healthlaw.org.

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Bridget with Troy Albright of True Garden.

Phoenix’s coaching staff as an assistant in 2006, helping lead the team to two WNBA championships (2007 and 2009). She then served as the Mercury’s director of basketball operations from 2010 to 2013 before joining the Los Angeles Sparks as an assistant coach in 2013. She spent three seasons as an assistant coach with the Dallas Wings (2014 to 2017), and as an assistant coach at the Chicago Sky (2019 to 2020).

She recently made local and national headlines when she stepped away from the WNBA citing, “increasing health concerns for players and social unrest around the country.”

“I asked a lot of questions that not too many people were happy about. I discovered that some medical staff of teams not only believe it’s not safe, but also the women don’t have enough resources as they believe we should, unlike the NBA going into this bubble,” Pettis says. “If the WNBA cannot upgrade the situation even more with safety I feel the WNBA should wait and play the following season.”

Instead of easing back into a peaceful break, Pettis is focusing her energy on her newly launched nonprofit, Project Roots AZ (also known as Project Roots or Project Roots, Inc.).

Project Roots AZ is a 501c3 organization that aims to educate the community on growing their own food through various educational programs, Pettis shares. They also support the homeless by feeding them from their community gardens and mobile Bridget showing a cauliflower from their garden.

Project Roots: Implementing change from the ground up Bridget Pettis steps away from the WNBA to help the community

By Michelle Talsma Everson; photos Courtesy of Project Roots AZ

W

hen we’re young, many of us dream about being professional athletes, but of course, we often give up those dreams as we get older in favor of more “practical” careers. For Bridget Pettis though, through hard work and dedication, that childhood dream became a reality.

“One of the things that I can personally say I’m very proud of is that I was able to do what it was that I set out for when I was a young girl and that was to play the game of basketball to my highest potential and I reaped many blessings for following my 14

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heart,” Pettis says. “Something that I want to be remembered for is someone who walked my words and did the very best that I could in helping leave my footprint of God’s love in the world.”

Bridget Pettis has three decades of experience in the WNBA as a player, coach and executive, she shares. Her WNBA career began in 1997 when the Phoenix Mercury selected her with the seventh overall pick in the WNBA Elite Draft. She played in the league for eight seasons with the Mercury and Indiana Fever before joining

kitchen service, supplying hygiene items, clothing, and shelter.

“Project Roots started when I was volunteering and growing food at Agave Farms Community Garden,” she explains.

“From there I would grow food and distribute it to the local food bank Cultural Cup, and then from there, it just kept growing. The name Project Roots came to my heart because it’s FEATURE STORY

the direction we have to go to for healing of any problem: the root. So we started digging and planting and growing and implementing change from the ground up.”

“I also took in consideration my family and how we grew up eating,” she continues. “I would sit on the porch and pick fresh beans with my mother, which was a way of eating I was rooted in — eating fresh organic food that was grown seasonally. That’s how we ate instead of fast food or even restaurants, but at home.”

Pettis believes serving others by educating them about growing their own food and aiding the hungry is the pivot that the community — and perhaps professional sports — needs right now.

“I feel the WNBA should use its platform this year in the communities of the teams and the communities where players live,” she says.

“I encourage others to find a project they are passionate about and jump in 100 percent.

We can play next year.”

“I definitely understand the WNBA is a business, but we need healthy players for this type of business to function properly,” she continues. “We seek to provide and promote a healthier, natural and more sustainable way of living in urban areas where there is a need.

This is the right decision for me and others as we move forward during the pandemic.”

Talking to shoppers at Spaces of Opportunity Farmers Market.

Pettis says that Project Roots AZ always needs volunteers to help them plant, weed, and harvest in their two gardens located at Spaces of Opportunity and Agave Farms.

Along with volunteering in their gardens, the nonprofit also offers seasonal produce bags, sells garden boxes for home use, makes soup for the homeless, and sells at the Spaces of

Opportunities farmers markets.

“Right now I’m focused on Project Roots and working to build up the support of this nonprofit,” she says. “My hope for this mission is to spread through the world, that not only

are we doing our part but that we encourage others to go back to the land, and more families to start and continue to grow their own food.”

In addition to the nonprofit’s local ties, Pettis has her sights set on expanding the organization’s roots.

“We are looking to expand to the Gary, Indiana area where my family resides,” she explains. “We are working to build relations within the community and best figure out ways to help build food security in these locations [Phoenix and Gary]. The best way to be a part of what we are doing is getting your hands in the dirt.”

“Project Roots is for the community,” Pettis adds. “All of our programs are supported from donations. We offer CSA boxes and well as our farmers markets and soup kitchen program, which is all donation-driven. We can do more and we want to do more; and as we grow the more people we can help feed and heal with healthy food.”

To learn more about Project Roots visit projectrootsaz.org and follow them on Facebook @projectrootsaz; Twitter @ projectroots1; and Instagram @project_rootsaz.

Michelle Talsma Everson is a freelance writer, editor and PR pro. A graduate of NAU, she’s been writing for Valley publications for more than a decade. You can find out more at mteverson.com.

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FEATURE STORY

Ask Brian: How can I reinvent myself?

“Coming Out” of COVID-19

By Brian Falduto; photos by Dallas Riley

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hether it was something you started brainstorming right away or something that occurred to you somewhere along in the quarantined state of the world, “How can I use this time to reinvent myself?” is likely a question you’ve thought about in the past however many weeks or so. We are in the slow but sure process of unfreezing things and that thawing process is coincidentally coinciding with Pride Season. I feel it’s a good time to discuss how the queer community specifically can “come out” of this stronger as our resilient type tend to do after trying times.

I remember when I finally came out of the closet my senior year of college, I wanted the world to stop for a moment. At that time, when the truth about who I was became non-negotiable, I didn’t know that coming out is actually a healing process. I didn’t know that I would have to spend the next chapter of my life battling 14 years of internalized homophobia and discovering a rejected self that was hidden in shame. Instead, I just waltzed into my twenties completely out of tune with who I was and with very little time to figure it out. I had to navigate my new role as a gay man while finishing college, getting a job, ending a relationship, moving into my first apartment, and all the while having to provide status updates to friends and family that were anything but reflective of what was going on inside.

During this healing chapter I didn’t know I was entering, the most important improvements on my relationship with myself have come during the quiet moments.

They’ve often arrived right when I’ve started to slow down, or even more often when I’ve crashed and burned from going too fast.

They’ve arrived on nights where I was alone with nothing but my own thoughts and feelings to keep me company. And they’ve arrived in the form of hurt. When I look back at some of the perceived tragedies of my twenties, I see that they were actually the biggest moments of growth.

Quiet. Loneliness. Tragedy. Does any of the above sound familiar? Look, we all know at its core that this pandemic is a bad thing with a negative impact. It comes with so many unanswered questions and troubling concerns. But I’d like to propose an additional way of looking at it and that is as the healing time that I, and perhaps we, have been waiting for.

If you think about what being in the closet is, it’s a form of compartmentalization where we disassociate from aspects of ourselves FEATURE STORY

that don’t feel important or worthy enough to present to the world. Those beautifully valid parts of our being get tucked away in the back of our mind and covered with lies and then when the lies get removed, there’s still shame and so then we cover up even more with busy schedules and vibrant social lives and beautiful photos of ourselves posted on Instagram so that no one has to see or deal with the real core of the problem which generally tends to be a lack of love for ourselves. After all, we don’t know who it is that we are loving because we haven’t had the chance to heal. The amount of instant pride we expect from those that come out as LGBTQ after living an incomplete life is basically what it’d be like to ask a brand new dancer to perform triple pirouettes proudly even though they’ve never tried anything like that before.

If this time of being quarantined has been particularly difficult for you, a good question to ask is, “Why?” And pay attention to what comes up. Is it something you’ve been avoiding? For me, some of the difficult moments have been the uncomfortable ones where I’ve realized how many aspects of myself were still being skipped over with the hustle and bustle of normal life. When these thoughts and feelings get uncovered after years of collecting dust, they can be a bit surprising. And as anyone who’s ever been in a haunted house knows, not all surprises feel good.

I love Pride Season. I love getting my shortest shorts on and coordinating tank top colors with my friends. I love partying and celebrating a part of myself I never thought I’d even acknowledge, never mind flaunt around the West Village. And it’s okay to grieve the loss of all that. But what if this June is a little less about pride and a little more about healing? It is yourself that you should be most proud of anyway so who better to celebrate it with than you. Perhaps if we get a little quiet with ourselves this year, we can be even louder & prouder next year than we’ve ever been before.

I wrote this piece prior to the recent current events involving the Black Lives Matter movement. I want to add that I stand in full support of that messaging and I encourage everyone inside and outside the LGBTQ community to get loud and take the action needed against racial injustice.

Let us remember, though, what the Lesbian American writer, feminist, womanist, librarian, and civil rights activist Audre Lorde said, “Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation and that is an act of political

warfare.” On the topic of healing, it’s clear that America needs just as much healing as prescribed above for LGBTQ persons, if not more. Let us make sure we lead that effort by doing that work on ourselves while we stand up for what we believe in. We can be of better help this way as it is physically impossible to pour from an empty cup.

Brian Falduto is an ICF certified LGBT Life Coach but he is best known for his child actor days as “that gay kid from School of Rock.”

Recently named by PrideLife Magazine as “one of the 20 most influential, outspoken, & optimistic individuals on the planet,” Brian wrapped a cross country #PrideTour this past summer inclusive of Sacramento Pride, RI Pride, Brooklyn Pride, Dallas Pride, & more. His Now This News interview has reached an audience of just under 5 million & he’s had similar reach with his Advocate essay. Brian’s latest single, “Like a Wave” dropped just last month & is now rippling its way through the digital streaming world. Brian is the lead in a new series, Fishing, which will hit the web soon.

Additionally, Brian has launched The Gay Life Coach podcast, which will be hosted by Brian & will feature some of the queer community’s most prominent storytellers. Meanwhile, you can catch his latest life coaching podcasts on his website or follow him on Instagram @thegaylifecoach.

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FEATURE STORY

Kill bills: Arizona’s LGBTQ Legislative Caucus fights for your rights

By Niki D’Andrea

A

State Rep. César Chávez (District 29).

rizona has a history of LGBTQ politicians on both sides of the aisle dating back to at least 1985, when U.S. Congressman Jim Kolbe (R) was elected (he came out as gay in 1996). He was followed

by U.S. Congressman (later Senator) Ken Cheuvront (D) and Tempe mayor Neil Giuliano (then a Republican) in 1994, State Rep. Steve May (R) in 1998, and former U.S. Congresswoman (now Senator) Kyrsten Sinema (D), who became the first openly bisexual member of congress when elected in 2012.

But it wasn’t until three years ago that Arizona got its first LGBTQ Legislative Caucus. It includes founding members State Rep. Daniel Hernandez (District 2), State Rep. Robert Meza (District 30), former State Rep. and current Arizona State Senator Tony Navarette (District 30), and State Rep. César Chávez (District 29) — all of whom identify as gay Latinos. Two more gay legislators joined after the caucus’ founding, State Representatives Arlando Teller (District 7) and Andrés Cano (District 3). All six caucus members are Democrats.

The caucus battles discriminatory bills and pushes legislation to protect the rights of the LGBTQ community — and it has had some major wins. Right now, it’s focused on mobilizing people to vote. and plans to be even more proactive after the November elections on issues like conversion therapy, discrimination in housing, and resources for LGBTQ youth.

“Our group is very inclusive of all Arizona and the diversity — and that’s so healthy and important, not only mentally, but spiritually, too,” Rep. Meza says. “People need to feel that they’re part of a tribe, part of a family, and we wanted to create that. And I think we did.”

The caucus was founded over drinks after a long day. Rep. Hernandez says they jokingly called themselves the “Gay Caucus,” but that night, they decided to make it official. They reached out to the California Legislative LGBT Caucus to learn about their structure.

The Arizona LGBTQ Legislative Caucus kicked off on National Coming Out Day in 2017.

“It was important to bring everything together to try and be realistic about the fact that a bunch of gay Latinos do not fully reflect the LGBTQ community. We bring people who have different perspectives from organizations like one•n•ten, Equality Arizona, One Community,” Hernandez says.

“These are the groups that are actually on the FEATURE STORY

ground and doing the work and have a better pulse on some of the needs, everything from conversion therapy to looking at how we address issues around employment discrimination and housing discrimination.

There have been a lot of moving pieces, but we were self-aware enough to realize that us as a group did not fully represent the entire community, and if we didn’t do more to formalize the process, a lot of voices would be left behind.”

The caucus has claimed a couple major victories in a short time — most notably, achieving the repeal in 2019 of Arizona’s “no promo homo” law, which prohibited HIV- and AIDS-related instruction in schools “that promotes a homosexual lifestyle.”

“After 28 years, we were able to lift the prohibition on talking about the LGBTQ community in Arizona public schools. For a group that’s only six people strong, we’ve been able to build some really strong partnerships with the coalition that we have

of activists, organizations, businesses, and other community leaders to make sure that we’re not relying on the goodness of the governor’s hand to not sign terrible laws, but instead killing bills before they get to his or her desk,” Hernandez says.

Another bill killed before it went anywhere was SB 1082, introduced by Republican State Senator Sylvia Allen in January. That bill would have removed “homosexuality” from sex education. It didn’t even advance far enough to be assigned to a committee.

“Over the last few years, you’ve seen this legislature try to go after the LGBTQ community. And when I say, ‘this legislature,’ I really mean more Republican-elected leaders going after the LGBTQ community,” Senator Navarette says. “Just this year, there was a bill sponsored by Representative (Nancy) Barto to ban transgender youth in high schools from participating in sports. As a parent of three high school students, it’s important to me that they’re able to engage ECHOMAG.COM

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State Rep. Daniel Hernandez (District 2).

Rep. Chávez says the LGBTQ Legislative Caucus is working toward equity in multiple areas: “As we go into this new era of representation, we’re also seeing that every issue is an LGBTQ issue. Every issue is a Latino or Black issue, right? Education, accessibility to healthcare, infrastructure, economic and workforce development — all of that is in the realm of what our community faces every day.”

It’s also trying to diversify. “The caucus is still all men, which is disappointing, but it’s grown because now we have not just gay Latinos, but a gay Native American (Rep. Teller),” Hernandez says. “Hopefully in the next couple of elections, we’ll be able to bring a little bit more diversity into the caucus.”

State Rep. Robert Meza (District 30).

The wins, Chávez adds, just empower them to keep working harder. “I’ve been introducing the ban on conversion therapy since my first session, and it’s one that I will continue to introduce until we actually get that in our statute,” he says.

But the most important thing the caucus is doing leading up to the elections is mobilizing people to vote. “A big priority for us in this election is making sure the LGBTQ community is: one, registered to vote for the general election; two, making sure they’re informed on the candidates, propositions, and the issues that are going to impact them directly; and three, making sure they go out and vote,” Navarette says.

“We’re going to need all citizens to get involved right now,” Meza concurs. “We’re going to need the LGBTQ community to sit on boards and stay attuned to everything — because they’re the future leaders of Arizona and the country.”

Meza says big changes are on the horizon.

“I don’t like making predictions, but I do know that each of us are going to be running committees next year, because we’re going to be taking over the State House,” he says. “It’s going to be a paradigm shift for Arizona.”

He adds that lobbying firms are increasingly hiring LGBTQ lobbyists.

“Probably the majority of the major lobbying firms are hiring LGBTQ people, and they’re also hiring people of color. For many years, I called it ‘The Blonde Ambition Tour,’” Meza

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says. “I kept telling them they needed to change way they function or they’re not going to be culturally competent to what’s happening in the environment … and it’s happening. It’s happening literally overnight.

The shift is happening very quickly and you’re going to see a different face at the Arizona Capitol. You’re going to see the face of Arizona.”

Former State Rep. and current Arizona State Senator Tony Navarette (District 30).

The ban on conversion therapy is a main line for the caucus. Other goals include working to combat housing discrimination, making it easier to change names on birth certificates and marriage licenses, and coordinating with school districts to provide resources for LGBTQ youth.

in extracurricular activities because that’s part of their development as young people.

Thankfully, we were able to defeat it in the Senate and it died there.”

Niki D’Andrea is a Phoenix-based journalist and editor whose career spans 28 years and includes editor positions at Phoenix New Times, PHOENIX magazine, and Times Media Group. Her scope of coverage has included political elections, drug culture, funding for HIV treatments and medicine, LGBTQ art, fringe sports, and celebrities. When not chasing stories, D’Andrea cheers on her favorite sports team, the Phoenix Mercury, and enjoys playing classic rock records from her collection of vinyl albums.

FEATURE STORY

Krewe of Hope is a blessing for homeless, restaurants, and community alike

By Buddy Early

“A nation’s greatness is measured by how it treats its weakest members.”

— Mahatma Ghandi

O

With the introduction of a global pandemic hitting the U.S. extremely hard, the disparity has created an economic crisis. The government response has been tepid at best, as Jeff Bezos continued to get richer, and corporations like Shake Shack, AutoNation, and the Los Angeles Lakers received payroll protection aid meant for small businesses.

Many individuals waited weeks, even months, for their one-time stimulus payment … and some still have not received it. Unemployment benefits for out-of-work Americans has either been exhausted or will be soon. The homeless population must continue to rely on the kindness of people. But in a time when everyone from families in crisis, to artists and service workers trying desperately to fill the gap, to small businesses struggling, 24

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Anne Titelbaum , Rudy Soliz, and Arana Wolin.

ne of the tenets that Americans have lived by has always been that we will take care of one another in times of need. This idea has been severely tested in recent years, as greed and selfishness have returned and led to an epic division between the haves and have-nots. Income inequality in the U.S. is the highest of all G7 nations, according to data from the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development; and the wealth gap between our richest and poorer families more than doubled from 1989 to 2016, according to analysis by the Pew Research Center.

are needing a hand-out, it’s no surprise that resources are stretched thin.

Enter Arana Wolin and Anne Titelbaum. The two Phoenicians understood early on during the pandemic that marginalized populations were at particular risk of falling through the cracks, and they identified a desperate need among Phoenix’s homeless. Anne, who moved from New Orleans to the Valley nearly a decade ago, had read about Krewe of Red Beans, a NOLA parade group that started delivering food to frontline healthcare workers

at the start of the pandemic. She approached Arana about doing something similar, and Krewe of Hope was created.

The two New Orleans Saints fans, members of the Desert Who Dats, who meet every Sunday during football season at Angry Crab to root on their team, slapped together a Facebook page and started hitting up friends for donations. “We thought, we could support local restaurants and help a community in need,” said Anne, pointing out the dual purpose of helping support local businesses FEATURE STORY

and feeding a homeless community.

Arana reached out to a friend who works at Justa Center, a resource and day center exclusively for homeless seniors in the Valley.

During COVID-19, the center has been relying on community support more than ever. Rudy Soliz, director of operations for Justa Center, said the over-55 homeless demographic often gets forgotten, particularly those “stuck between 55 and 62.”

“Nobody wants to hire them, but they can’t get (social security) retirement benefits,” said Rudy. “They fall through the cracks. “A lot are on a set income, so they only qualify for so much assistance.”

Rudy knows precisely of what he speaks, having spent more than two years on the streets as a homeless senior, benefiting from the services provided by Justa Center before landing a job there. He said he landed in that predicament due to the bad choices he made in life — choices that cost him his wife, children, and his job. People living on the streets, however, all deserve respect and compassion, regardless of whether they are there because of their own actions or unfortunate circumstances, believes Rudy.

“People can be very judgmental,” said Rudy.

“We all struggle alone.”

Coronavirus has impacted the Valley’s homeless hard, hitting at a time when temperatures are in triple digits and more Arizonans are seeking help.

“Everything changed,” Rudy said of the COVID-19 impact. Social distancing and safety protocols required the Center to stop doing new intakes for a while. Serving their clients became a challenge. He expects a more serious blow will be struck at the end of September, when Governor Doug Ducey’s eviction protection policy due to COVID-19 will have expired.

In the meantime, the extra help offered

by Krewe of Hope has been a blessing. The concept is simple: every week Arana and Anne collect donations from community members, reach out to local restaurants to place lunch orders for approximately 125 individuals, then pick up and deliver these meals every Saturday to the Center at 10th Avenue and Jefferson Street. The women try to keep the orders at $5 per head, which has created challenges only on rare occasions.

They started Krewe of Hope on March 26, and made their first delivery on April 4. By August 1, they were at nearly $9,000 raised and 2,225 meals served.

“We are targeting restaurants that are family-owned, and often multi-generational,” said Anne. “It takes a lot of dialing.”

Soliciting funds from a community dealing with a severe economic downturn would seem to be difficult, but Krewe of Hope has not missed a single Saturday in four months.

According to Arana, there have been weeks when almost the entire cash reserve is depleted; however, one way or another they FEATURE STORY

have been able to raise the funds necessary to purchase meals the following week.

together rather than them having to stand in line elsewhere trying to get a meal.

“We got to a point where there was, like, $39 in the account,” said Arana, who posted on the group’s Facebook page that they would not be able to complete the group’s mission for that week. Within the next 24 hours she was contacted by Uberrito, which not only stepped up to fill the need, but did so as a donation. In the middle of another week that say funds at a low point, a stranger to the group Venmo’d Arana $600. And for July 4, Short Leash Hot Dogs in the Melrose District opened specifically for Krewe of Hope to make 60 Hot Dogs.

“It’s a wonderful team they’ve got,” declared Rudy. “Those two young ladies work hard every week. If not for them a lot of these seniors would be leaving Justa Center … dealing with things like heatstroke and the threat of Coronavirus.”

Other restaurants that have participated include Little Szechuan, McGurkey’s, Someburros, Cheese N Stuff, Cocina Madrigal and Pat’s Pizza Plus. Anne and Arana have witnessed the community and these local restaurants go above and beyond, restoring their faith in humanity during the process.

“I would definitely be open to seeing Krewe evolve into something else,” said Arana. “In my utopia, there would be a growth spurt in participation.”

“I’m pretty sure I get just as much out of this as the restaurants and misplaced seniors,” beamed Arana, who professed that making daily calls at the end of her 9 to 5 job is the highlight of her week.

“We wouldn’t be able to do it without them; we’re just the ones carrying out the orders” added Anne, speaking of the donors and participating restaurants. Anne says Krewe of Hope is part of a trend she has been noticing in Phoenix, one that has been lacking since arriving in 2012. Phoenix has a reputation for being a bedroom community, meaning people leave work, drive home, park in their garage and settle in for the night.

“In New Orleans there were a lot of things that brought people out of their homes to be a part of the community,” Anne said. But downtown Phoenix has seen a resurgence of humanitarianism, volunteerism, and people caring for their communities, she believes.

The Justa Center is grateful to Krewe not only for providing nutritious meals each Saturday, but for helping keep its seniors

While the two do-gooders haven’t discussed where Krewe of Hope goes postpandemic, should its impact on society be lessened, they are open to expanding the group’s reach, possibly to embrace the idea of cash mobs — an organized group assembling at a local business to infuse dollars into it.

That participation is simple. The Krewe of Hope Facebook page is up to over 250 members, and anyone can join. Donations of any amount are accepted through Arana’s Venmo account (@Arana-Wolin) — and, yes, there is 100% transparency. Additionally, Arana and Anne are always open to suggestions for participating restaurants.

So, while it is clear that resources are indeed stretched thin at this critical time in our nation’s history, it’s also clear that it is times like these when Americans show their true compassion and recognize that giving is incumbent for a society that wants to thrive.

The aforementioned dual purpose of Krewe of Hope (to help local restaurants as well as people in need) is actually a three-pronged purpose, according to the women: it is allowing the community an opportunity to give back. That’s something we can never have too much of.

Buddy Early grew up in Tempe and has been involved in various communities across the Valley since.

He is a former managing editor of both Echo Magazine and Compete Magazine.

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Lew Williams; courtesy of OSP.

Organ Stop Pizza: Where a oneman-band is an entire orchestra

The venue's two professional organists dish on life behind the keys of the Mighty Wurlitzer

By Michelle Talsma Everson

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FEATURE STORY

M

ost Valley residents have been to or at least know of Organ Stop Pizza (OSP) — the local tourist attraction that offers pizza, salad, and ice cream with a side of musical theater courtesy of its signature Mighty Wurlitzer Theater Pipe Organ. Well, it's not so much a side dish as the main course.

The food is great but it's the world class pipe organ's music that stays with you.

Recently, Echo had the chance to take a tour behind the scenes and chat with OSP’s two resident musicians — Lew Williams, who has been with the venue for over 40 years — and Brett Valliant, who has been a fill-in musician for a decade, but was brought in to be a mainstay in December 2019.

Both organists work full-time, performing for several hours in a sitting for OSP patrons.

Check out tidbits from our interview below and make sure to visit this story on our website to hear some of the tunes.

Echo: What made you decide to pursue a career as a professional organist?

Lew: When I heard popular organ music as a kid, I knew that I wanted a career as a musician. I then went on to study classical organ music, and earned a bachelor’s and master’s degrees in music, and studied and did competitions all over, including Switzerland.

I connected with the then-owner of Organ Stop Pizza in 1978 and invited him to a church concert that I was performing at; he attended.

Then, in 1979, he offered me the job of being an organist at Organ Stop Pizza.

Brett: I was fascinated with the organ at two years old, and by 15 was performing concerts around the U.S. I studied classical organ and was a church organist for 25 years, while performing around the world. I’ve been filling in at OSP when they needed me for about a decade, but joined the staff full-time late last year when famed organist Charlie Balogh passed. There, of course, is no filling his shoes.

OSP is “Home of the Mighty Wurlitzer Pipe Organ” and has served the Valley nearly 50 years. Organ Stop Pizza attracts hundreds of thousands of patrons each year with its theatrical performances complete with dancing cat puppets, disco balls, and bubbles. Songs range from classical music to Disney favorites to pop and rock hits.

They are a cash or check only business. No credit or debit cards accepted.

According to OSP, the historic entertainment and restaurant destination has gone from serving up to 700 people to just 250 during COVID-19. The owners have worked very hard to make the restaurant as safe as possible for guests and staff; those who are interested in learning more can visit the website at organstoppizza.com to see a video that walks viewers through what to expect at OSP during today’s new safety precautions.

Brett: The theater organ was created to take the place of a theater orchestra. You are literally a one person symphony.

How has COVID-19 impacted OSP and your performances?

Lew: January through April has always been our busy season with winter visitors; we played at 11 a.m. to a crowd; at 1:30 p.m.; then from 4:30-9 p.m. We could spend hours playing for 2,000 to 3,000 people a day. But, with COVID-19, obviously it has taken an extreme toll on business, as this space that usually held 750 people now can only safely hold a fraction of that. People who do come though are appreciative of the music and our efforts. They enjoy the food of course, but they’re definitely here to hear the organ.

What are some of the most popular songs that are requested?

Brett: You have to understand, in our busiest times, we can easily play 10 to 11 hours a day.

Some of the most requested songs are “Under the Sea,” “Baby Shark,” music from Frozen, music from Star Wars, “Bohemian Rhapsody,” music from Titanic, the list goes on.

What stands out to you the most about the Mighty Wurlitzer?

Lew: The sound of the organ is like the sound of a living creature; you can feel the ebb and flow of the acoustics as the air moves through the pipes. It takes years to get everything down; every pipe organ has its own personality. From this one instrument we control everything at OSP except the kitchen!

What would you tell a young musician — like you both were at one point — who is interested in becoming a professional organist?

Lew: Get a real job, let this be a hobby (he says with a laugh). An organist I admired told me: “If you have something else you can do, do it. Anything else in the world! Only pursue music as a career if you can’t picture yourself doing anything else.”

Brett: Since I’m the newer one to this particular instrument, I come in frequently, even when I’m not playing, to practice and watch. I’m still evolving as a musician with the Mighty Wurlitzer, especially when learning new pieces.

Courtesy of OSP.

Tell us about what it’s like to be a professional organist, especially at OSP.

Organ Stop Pizza 101

Lew: You need to have 15 hours of music in your head that you’re ready to play at a moment’s notice because you have no sheet music. Depending on the time of day, the demographics of the audience change; the mood shifts depending on the crowd. You have to be able to read the room with your back to them. When I first played, I was petrified!

No one can teach you how to do this. The audience will tell you non-verbally. If you get into the right groove, you can feel the audience as one living entity. Oh, and be prepared to play one song six to seven different ways.

Brett: We are both grateful and amazed though to do what we do; who else can say they are playing live music to an audience right now, especially during COVID? For those who have never been to Organ Stop Pizza, what would you tell them about the experience of seeing the Mighty Wurlitzer?

Lew: Where else can you come, sit down, request a tune, and have it played by an amazing instrument? Where else do people perform live? We’re going to keep doing this as long as we can; as long as people keep coming through the door.

Brett: There’s nothing like this anywhere else in the world. Nothing with this kind of wow factor for sure.

Michelle Talsma Everson is a freelance writer, editor and PR pro. A graduate of NAU, she’s been writing for Valley publications for more than a decade. You can find out more at mteverson.com.

FEATURE STORY

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16 STEM toys to boost kids’ knowledge, understanding, and interest in Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics

By Kimberly Blaker

T

oday, it’s more crucial than ever that boys and girls alike develop a keen interest in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM). Over the coming decades, the pace of scientific and technological advancement is expected to continue climbing at an exponential rate.

As a result, STEM fields will see continued growth while blue-collar jobs, among other professions, decline. So it’s essential kids are well prepared for a drastically different job market.

STEM offers kids other benefits as well. It stimulates and teaches critical thinking and problem-solving skills — competencies that go a long way in any career and in life.

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Projects kids can make include an AM radio, burglar alarm, doorbell, flying saucer, and voice recorder, to name a few.

So how do you help your child develop an appreciation for STEM and boost their knowledge and understanding in these subjects? Play that provides opportunities to apply concepts and skills is one of the best ways for kids to learn. There are numerous games, toys, and kits on the market that make learning STEM loads of fun.

Toys that teach STEM Qurious Space for ages 3+. This 4-in-1 family card game teaches kids about the solar system, milky way galaxy, and more. Kids learn simple strategy and creative problemsolving skills while developing vocabulary and enhancing their memory.

Magformers for ages 3+. These magnetic geometric construction kits come in a variety of choices. Kids can build 3D structures such as houses, pyramids, and balls out of colorful magnetic triangles, diamonds, trapezoids, and squares.

MuddWatt STEM Kit: Clean Energy from FEATURE STORY

Mud! for ages 8+. Kids will love conducting these experiments with soil by adding ingredients from the fridge to build a living fuel cell. A free app then gives kids the tool to measure the power and track microbe growth.

of a national Mensa award, Rush Hour is a game of logic that sharpens kids’ planning and sequential reasoning skills. There are 40 challenges from beginner to expert in this traffic gridlock game. The goal is to move cars through the puzzle until the red car

Snap Circuits for ages 7+. Keep kids busy and learning with these electronics discovery kits that provide kids more than 100 projects to do. Snap Circuit kits have won numerous awards and come in several variations. Contents of various kits include phototransistors, LEDs, resistors, ICs, DC motors, flying propellers, electromagnets, lamps, switches, and much more. Projects kids can make include an AM radio, burglar alarm, doorbell, flying saucer, and voice recorder, to name a few.

Kids can build 12 different toy designs while developing their motor skills, eye-hand coordination, logical thinking, and problemsolving skills.

Sequence for Kids for ages 4 to 7. The goal in this strategy-building card and board game is to be the first to place four chips in a row.

The challenge is to think strategically and finish before your opponent uses a unicorn card to remove a chip.

escapes the traffic jam.

IQ Fit for ages 6+. This spatial reasoning and problem-solving game boasts 120 challenges in which kids must fill the board with the missing 3-D pieces. It’s a compact travel size game and a great value.

Gravity Maze for ages 8+. Kids use spatial reasoning skills to arrange towers to create a path for a marble to go from its start position to its target tower. It includes 60 challenge cards ranging from beginner to expert.

DoughLab STEM Kit: Bake and Learn for ages 6+. This yummy bread-making experimentation kit includes five experiments through which kids discover the perfect recipe and learn about the power of yeast.

Osmos Genius Kit for ages 5 to 12. This kit boasts five games that turn an iPad into a hands-on learning experience. On the iPad, Osmo interacts with every real-live move. This kit enhances kids’ visual thinking, creative problem-solving skills, and self-expression.

Rock On! Geology Game for ages 5+. Kids explore the earth’s geological treasures in this fun science game. It comes complete with an assortment of rock and mineral specimens.

ThinkFun Rush Hour for ages 8+. Winner

FEATURE STORY

Big Bag of Science for ages 8+. More than 70 fun activities can be performed with this

kit in the areas of chemistry, physics, biology, geology, magnetism, weather, and flight. Kids use real scientific tools, which are included in the kit, to do their experiments that’ll amaze family and friends.

ETI Toys Lil’ Engineers Engineering Blocks for ages 3 to 6. This box of colorful, multi-size and multi-shape blocks, screws, nuts, plates, wheels, and connectors keeps kids engrossed for hours. Kids can build 12 different toy designs while developing their motor skills, eye-hand coordination, logical thinking, and problem-solving skills.

Prime Climb for ages 10+. Learning to add, subtract, divide, and multiply is a breeze with this award-winning mathematics board game.

Goobi Construction Set for ages 3+. Kids learn about magnetism while constructing 3D structures out of colorful plastic bars, iron balls, and tripods. Children will develop a sense of proportion while improving eyehand coordination, problem-solving skills, and learning the basics of physics, geometry, and architecture.

Green Kid Crafts, Rainforest Discovery Science Box for ages 3 to 10. This kit embraces kids’ creativity while providing them scientific exploration. Kids can conduct a rainforest pollution experiment, create a rain stick, and build a rainforest terrarium, among other activities.

Kimberly Blaker is a freelance family writer. She also does blog and content writing for a variety of industries and is an expert in on-page SEO.

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Apps for the win!

By Kimberly Blaker

with this app to keep everyone in the loop.

In addition to keeping track of schedules, it manages reminders, to-do lists, shopping lists, and recipes.

Netspark Parental Control Light. Android.

Paid subscription. Get powerful filtering with this app to protect your kids from harmful images, text, and video content. It also allows parents to set time limits for daily or weekly screen time.

The tracker can also send you text alerts when your child or teen arrives at or leaves a destination.

ToddlyTic. Android & iPhone. Free 30-day trial. This app is an excellent way to communicate with your child›s daycare or teachers. It helps you stay on top of your childs attendance, grades, and more. You can also use the app to manage and make tuition payments to your child’s school.

Life360 Family Locator – GPS Tracker. Android & iPhone. Free. With this app, you can create «circles» of family members and friends. Then you can view the location of anyone in your circle on a map.

The tracker can also send you text alerts when your child or teen arrives at or leaves a destination.

KidsPlace Parental Control by Kiddoware. Android. Free or paid upgrade.

Block kids from buying or downloading apps and incoming calls with this app. Premium features include a timer that locks apps after a specified period or based on a permanent schedule.

ChoreMonster. Android & iPhone. Free. This app is a great way to gain kids cooperation with chores. Kids can keep track of the points they earn for completing tasks. Then they can use the points to buy rewards such as extra time for video games, a special treat, or family outing.

11 Must-have phone apps to simplify parenting

W

hether you need a solution to help monitor your baby, track and reward your kiddos for chores, or keep your teen from texting while driving, there’s a phone app that does it for you.

The following useful apps are designed specifically for parents and families. Better yet, most of these parent-tested apps are free for both Android and iPhone.

Screen Time Parental Control. Android & iPhone. Free trial. This useful app gives parents a variety of controls to limit their kids› screen time. It also allows parents to block

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apps and games from their kids at bedtime or during school hours. Parents can even push a button on their own phone to time-out their kids phones when they ignore requests to get off their phones.

MMGuardian. Android & iPhone. Free.

This pre-teen and teen monitoring app allows parents to monitor and block text messages, apps, calls, and URLs. It also has configurations to limit screen time.

Cozi Family Organizer. Android & iPhone.

Free or paid upgrade. Manage and share your family calendar between all your devices

DriveSafe.ly. Android. Free or paid upgrade.

If you have teen drivers, this app is a musthave. It reads text messages and emails aloud and announces the name of incoming callers without having to touch the phone. The paid version allows for a hands-free response to messages as well.

Baby Monitor 3G. Android & iPhone. $3.99.

Monitor your baby with both video and audio, and receive alerts when your baby awakens.

Particularly helpful, you can see your baby in the dark with this app. It also tracks how often your baby wakes, and it replays audio.

You can also press a button on your phone to talk to your baby.

Wheel of Chores. Android & iPhone. Free.

This app adds fun and excitement to chores.

Kids can spin the wheel for a task and earn points toward rewards. At the end of the week, parents can distribute the money or prizes, or kids can bank their points to save up.

FEATURE STORY

Fun phone apps for kids to stimulate thinking and creativity

W

ith a massive sea of kids’ phone apps on the market, which ones best maximize kids’ media time?

The following is a selection of kid-tested and parent-approved apps to help boost kids’ critical thinking skills and creativity.

Piano Kids – Music & Songs. Free for Android. Ages 3+. This top-rated app teaches kids and parents how to play musical instruments, including the piano, xylophone, and drums. It exercises children’s memory, concentration, creativity, listening skills, and motor skills.

Flow Free. Free for all platforms. Ages 8+.

This color-based game offers various levels of play to sustain the interest of grade-school kids on up to adults. It improves complex thinking skills as players try to connect the dots to create pipes without crossing over another color.

Super Family Hero. Free for all platforms.

Ages 4+. Kids and parents can enjoy this family game with individual levels of difficulty that make the game challenging yet fair to all players. Create custom Avatars, then use Interactive Stories to play mini-games, and attempt to defeat Dr. Excuses.

Heads Up! Free for Android. $1 Apple. Ages 6+. Based on the Heads Up! game created by

Ellen DeGeneres, this family game is a blast for all ages. A player holds the phone on their head with an image facing out for the other players to see. The player’s teammate then acts out the image shown on the phone while the teammate holding it up has to guess what his teammate is acting out.

Kids Build & Crash Blocks Game. Free for all platforms. Ages 1 – 4. Toddlers and preschoolers can build tall towers with colorful blocks while learning their colors and numbers. When they’re done building, children thrill at crashing the tower. Your child can never lose in this game. The app also features fun sound effects and animations.

Lego City My City 2. Free for Android. Ages 7 – 14. With 15 mini-games in all, players go on thrilling car chases to catch thieves, blast off into space, and do underwater exploration.

As players move through the game, they earn blocks and components to build vehicles and complete their missions.

Doodle Magic Joy. Free for Android. Ages 3+. This drawing app, with colors ranging from soft pastels to bright neons, offers a variety of art tools including pen, calligraphy, airbrush, crayon, pastel, sponge, eraser, and more. When doodles are complete, the art

can be saved and even played back as a cartoon. This is a fun app for kids to adults.

Unblock Me Free. Free for all platforms.

Ages 7+. This mental workout boasts 16,000 puzzles in all. The object of the game is to unblock the red block in as few moves as possible. Kids and adults can compete with friends and players around the world.

3/2 Chess. Free for Android. Ages 5+. Played much like standard chess for two players, this game is designed for up to three players.

3/2 Chess is a strategy game that boosts creativity and critical thinking skills.

Hoopa City 2. $3.99 for all platforms. Ages 5 – 10. Kids can build the city of their dreams with skyscraper apartments, shopping malls, and beach resorts in this 3D game app. Then they can play inside the city they’ve built, dress up their citizens, and even switch to night mode to see their city lit up.

Magic Tiles 3. Free for all platforms. Ages 7+.

This massively popular piano game requires players to tap the black tiles while avoiding the white ones to generate beautiful, highquality music. The app features additional instruments such as guitar, as well as a battle mode where kids can compete with other players around the world.

The player’s teammate then acts out the image shown on the phone while the teammate holding it up has to guess what his teammate is acting out.

ColorMinis Kids. Free for all platforms.

Ages 3+. With this color and design app, kids experiment with a variety of colors and materials, including Real 3D gloss, clay, glass, metal, and more. They can color and design anime figures, animals, robots, castles, and much more. When their design is complete, they’ll create animated gifs of their creations.

PBS Kids Video. Free all platforms. Ages 2+. Kids can watch their favorite PBS Kids shows wherever you go. This app is a fun form of educational entertainment for young children when riding in the car, waiting for appointments, and on shopping trips. In addition to thousands of videos of their favorite shows, they’ll also be introduced to the “Weekly Pick” of educational videos.

Drawing for Kids! Learning Games for Toddlers. Free for Android. Ages 2 – 5. This app is an easy way for even the youngest toddlers to learn how to draw. It includes fun sounds and animations as each drawing comes to life.

Kimberly Blaker is a freelance family writer. She also does blog and content writing for a variety of industries and is an expert in on page SEO. FEATURE STORY

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WITHOUT RESERVATIONS

Seafood in a snap: Trolling Mr. Claws A new East Valley option for affordable seafood Story and photos by Jeff Kronenfeld

A

ny one of the three combos from Mr. Claws — the East Valley’s newest purveyor of affordable seafood — is a feast in a bag. Case in point, our order of combo three, which came with at least a pound each of king crab legs, mussels on the shell, shrimp and crawfish. In addition, the steamy sack also contained red potatoes, a corn quarter, pieces of sausage and about a half-gallon of buttery seafood sauce to dip it all in. While this ocean of mostly invertebrate meat proved more than my dining companion and I could finish, I like a place that fills my gut instead of draining my wallet.

his favorite mollusks at communal meals, Nguyen recalled hearing the same question over and over.

the space. However, the aroma of boiling crustaceans quickly reminded me that there was a new cook in town.

“Everybody just kept asking us to open a restaurant,” Nguyen said. “We were always like yeah, yeah, but it never really came to mind until the last two and a half years or so.”

Like I said earlier, I ordered the third combo option, which was more than enough for two if not three or more people. In the future, I will probably stick to ordering individual dishes, but if you’re feeding a group, the combos are a safe and easy bet. The number two combo was the same as ours, but with a pound of snow crab instead of the king crab. Combo one includes everything but a crab serving.

It’s still plenty of food, but the crab was our favorite part. That is, once we broke through the oversized crustacean’s thick exoskeleton.

The family the pair fed all these years eventually put their money where their mouths were, helping Nguyen and his wife secure Mr. Claws’ current location. East

The homestyle approach of Mr. Claws harkens back to the beginnings of co-owner Peter Nguyen’s taste for the ocean’s bounty.

Growing up in Orange County, California, Nguyen and his family would often grill fresh seafood, something he still looks back on fondly. His favorite was slurping warm mussels from the shell in the ocean’s temperate breeze.

While the air is a few degrees warmer than that in Mesa at the moment, at least you can taste the saltwater without braving travel in the age of COVID-19.

Together with his wife and co-owner Trinh Vong, Nguyen opened the doors at Mr. Claws on July 3. Neither comes from a professional culinary background, but that doesn’t mean they’re lost at sea in the kitchen. The couple has been preparing meals for family gatherings and other large functions for almost a decade.

When serving up generous portions of 32

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One of many plates that include king crab, mussels, deveined shrimp, crawdads, corn and potatoes.

of South Alma School Road and a few blocks north of the U.S. 60, the interior is surprisingly spacious. A few vestiges of From the Roots Up Vegetarian Soul Food, the spot’s former occupant, still haunt

The two pairs of arms were large enough to make me glad the burly beasts they were once attached to stick to deep waters. We once again used our metal lemon juicer to crack the armor, which again did the job. One nice aspect about the king crab is that its larger size makes it a little easier to fish out the soft inners with one clean pull. Nguyen actually prefers the snow crab, which is cheaper and sweeter than its royal counterpart.

After successfully overcoming the spikey shell, we learned it was definitely worth the effort. The crab’s natural sweetness stood out even when the white flesh was practically drowned in garlic sauce. As I worked my way from the biggest segments DINING OUT

the pleasure of these little crayfish, they really are like mini lobsters. Like a lobster, the best meat is in the tail. Some like to also suck out the brains, which I am guilty of trying in the past, though this time I refrained.

I ate a few tails but with so much premium crab and shrimp, I just didn’t want to fill precious belly space with this lesser crustacean. I think I might have forgotten how to properly deshell crawdads too.

Or maybe it’s always that gruesome and I just repress the memory each time. This is definitely not for the squeamish, but you really can’t take that sort anywhere fun.

The non-seafood items were good too, though I could have used a second corn quarter and maybe a little more sausage.

Take a

TROPICAL STAYCATION to the littlest, I enjoyed noticing the subtle differences in flavor and texture. Eating crab isn’t for the faint of heart or weak of finger, but its clean flavor and light texture mean even those who turn their noses up at fish might consider a few test nibbles.

Like Nguyen, I too appreciate a good mussel. Maybe it’s because scrapping the fleshy foot with my incisors brings out my inner sea mammal, or maybe it’s the tender chewiness. In either case, the medium heat of the sauce and savory saltiness of the meat mingled pleasantly in my mouth. I used the shell as a spoon, fill it with sauce which I swallowed with the mussel. Make sure to have a separate plate or plates on hand for shells and other less palatable body parts. Also, plenty of napkins or paper towels.

For a modest two-dollar upcharge, you can get the shrimp pre-peeled and predecapitated. I always find this particular task a little unappetizing, so I really appreciated this option. The tender but plump white curlicues of flesh held flavors nicely without any traces of unpleasant fishiness. These little protein puffs were my dining companions favorite, definitely a good thing considering how much food a pound of shrimp really is.

Last but not least was the pound of ruby red crawfish, also known as crawdads, mudbugs or mountain lobsters. Whatever you call them, these were particularly large and succulent representatives of the species. For those who haven’t had DINING OUT

ISLAND STYLE EATS TIKI DRINKS TO-GO WEEKEND BRUNCH phoenix 5114 n. 7th st. scottsdale 7213 e. 1st ave. high street 5450 e. high st. #101 hulasmoderntiki.com

This seafood spot’s neatly-packaged seafood feast.

The red potatoes were soft, creamy and infused with sauce. The corn quarter was juicy as a ripe peach. The kernels liquified as I quickly stripped the cobb clear. I actually didn’t notice the two pieces of sausage the first day and I feel they should include more or just omit it.

When visiting in the future, I’ll likely stick to ordering ala carte. That way I can focus on the crab, lobster tail, mussel or shrimp I prefer and avoid the crawdads. For me, they are more of an occasional novelty.

Plus, ordering individual items would let me try the masago creamy scallops or grilled garlic butter oysters. The shrimp garlic noodle also looked interesting as a quick and filling lunch. If you’re seeking a quick brain food lunch or a more adventurous culinary outing, Mr. Claws is ready to help in a snap.

Jeff Kronenfeld is an independent journalist based out of Phoenix, Arizona. His writing has been featured in Java Magazine, the Arts Beacon, PHXSUX, and the Phoenix Jewish News, where he received the Simon Rockower Award for excellence in news reporting from the American Jewish Press Association. Links to his previously published work are available at www.jeffkronenfeld.com.

Fine Chinese Cuisine Wine  Cocktails

Open for Take-Out only!

11 a.m. - 9 p.m.

602.266.4463 Third Street / One Block S. of Osborn

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ENTERTAINMENT NEWS

I

used to think being a native Californian was a rarity. And to be born in Hollywood, well that was truly exceptional; much like actor Phillip Keene who calls it his hometown.

The first thing you notice about the 53-year-old is how handsome he is. He stands tall, beams with boy-next-door charm and looks like a Nautica model. That’s on the surface. Underneath, he’s well-educated, loves Pan Am collectables and speaks several languages, He has garnered a number of Screen Actors Guild nominations while spending 13 lucky years of his life, collectively, on two of cable’s most popular detective shows.

He played surveillance expert Buzz Watson on both police procedural TNT series The Closer and its spinoff Major Crimes. The latter ended in 2018.

I talked to Keene via telephone to discuss Project Wingman, a program that helped get medical personnel away from the frontlines of the coronavirus. Thankfully that program is no longer needed, but we’ll get to that a little later.

He was a little preoccupied with the excitement of getting a delivery from a Swiss photographer friend. Apparently, his friend flew a drone over Los Angeles during the pandemic capturing images of empty streets, businesses and freeways and made a book called Lockdown L.A. It’s a historic moment.

While he waited for FedEx we discussed other interesting aspects of his life including his time as a flight attendant, what he’s doing during the pandemic, and his acting career.

If you didn’t know, Keene is also an out, gay actor. Today, that revelation doesn’t really have as much of an impact as it would, say, 10 years ago. Still it’s important because there was a time when being out and proud in Hollywood as an actor meant limiting your roles. So rather than risk your livelihood, you just stayed in the closet.

Keene says the industry has changed and being gay is no longer a deal-breaker. “I don’t think it’s as much of an issue — if at all — as it has been in the past,” he said with assurance; sexuality was never a concern. “I only say that because of the number of guest stars that we had coming through and knowing some of the casting people who, you know, recommended these actors.”

Curious what he thinks about straight men playing gay roles, I asked him if he agreed with activists who feel gay roles shouldn’t go to heterosexual men.

Actor Phillip Keene is flying in the face of the Coronavirus

By Timothy Rawles; photos by Kei Moreno 34

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He doesn’t have a problem with that. “I think as long as they respect the character and they’re the best person for the role,” he said. “If they bring what it is that the director or the writer are looking for then that’s what it is. So, I don’t see that as an issue as long as everyone has been given an opportunity.

And those who are qualified to come in and audition. Let the best person get the role ENTERTAINMENT

whoever it is. I say that about straight roles, as well.”

service uniforms were fashion statements not examples of bland retail frippery.

As mentioned before, Keene is a commercial airline enthusiast especially when it comes to Pan American World Airways (or Pam An for short). Before the company went under in 1991, they were not only the largest international air carrier, but a pop culture icon. Enthusiasts were enamored by the company’s archetypal blue globe logo and branded merchandise. They were like the Disney of the airline industry.

“Whether you were seated in the back or the front, the service was pretty good, and they took care of you,” he says. “They had to entertain you whether it was through food or service or the attendants on board or the amenities of the cabin, but now everybody’s got their own personal devices and don’t want to be spoken to. They don’t want to be interrupted for, you know, cruddy food that they’re serving in plastic.”

Before Keene became an actor, he was a flight attendant for Pan Am. In fact, he worked on the second 747 ever made for commercial use. He still collects memorabilia from the historic company.

In the Pan Am era passengers were treated as royalty. “That aspect has changed a lot and the passengers have changed,” he says. “When I was flying, there was maybe one or two incidents of passengers misbehaving. Granted I only flew for four years when I was flying internationally.”

We talked a little bit about how the air travel experience has changed over the past two decades. As ticket prices become affordable, domestic jets seem more like cattle cars than luxury excursions. The era of American five-star flying is over.

Keene says that getting to your destination used to be part of the adventure. It was part of the fun. Flip-flops and tank tops were not considered flying attire and in-flight

Unfortunately, due to the pandemic, Keene is grounded and isn’t taking as many trips as he’d like to these days, and for good reason.

“My husband of 27 years has been HIVpositive since probably 1982. So we’re extra careful,” he says. “I’m just keeping to myself and not going out into the world.”

Even small excursions are limited. He tells me he’s only gone to the grocery store about half a dozen times since March and is fortunate that almost everything can be delivered to the doorstep.

Still, he makes time for a few friends who he trusts, having them adhere to fixed precautions.

“We have this little bubble. We have a couple of friends who are more terrified than we are but they got tested and they came to stay with us for a a week.” His voice seems happy discussing seeing friends in his space. “So now we’ve maintained this pact if you will — with about four or five of our friends and we are all interested in the same rules. We have other friends who are a little looser with their ideas of what quarantining is so we let them do their thing on their time and their space.

We don’t hang out with them because their idea is different than ours.”

What helps him get through home confinement is exploring his culinary side. COVID-19 house arrest has given him some inspiration to sharpen

ENTERTAINMENT

burgeoning skills in the kitchen, “It allows you to be creative and I’m doing something where I can see a positive result at the end.”

Not everyone is as lucky during this time in history.

Which brings us to the people who have to literally face the pandemic head-on; the medical workers. Keene decided to help those who are risking their lives to help others. He took his love of air travel and applied it to New Yorkers in something called Project Wingman, where pop-up lounges inside hospitals were makeshift locations of Zen. “Let me preface this conversation by saying it is just ended because the number of patients in New York has gone down so much that they don’t need those lounges anymore,” he explains. “So, there were two of them in New York; the bigger hospitals, staffed by airline personnel.”

The idea was to create a place staffed by volunteers who work as flight attendants. It was a place where medical professionals could relax, have refreshments and just unwind.

“Flight attendants are famous for being called ‘jump seat therapists.’ So if you sit down with a complete stranger, a flight attendant, within 20 minutes, you know, the two of you are best friends and you know all the ins and outs of each other’s lives. So that’s kind of what that was about. It was providing a space for healthcare professionals to unload and relax and be ready to go back and fight in the trenches again.”

As for what Keene has planned in the future, he is working on something he wrote for television. He and his husband, television writer, producer and director James Duff, are collaborating on a comedy.

“So, he wrote a little outline and registered with the Guild and we had a couple of meetings with some producers who think it’s a great idea,” he tells me. “So, if we can get that off the ground in some form or fashion, that would be amazing.”

Speaking of getting off the ground, as we wrapped up, I was curious to see if that parcel that contained his friend’s book had arrived.

“No, not yet,” he said. I couldn’t help but notice the merriment in his voice as he answered.

The man born in Hollywood who has probably seen the cityscape hundreds of times from the sky, will see it in an entirely new perspective for the first time. Sometimes you don’t need to travel that far to see an entirely new world.

Timothy Rawles is an award-winning journalist and California native who moved to Arizona with his husband and two children in 2019. He attended San Francisco State University many years ago and somehow managed to pass math and continue pursuing his journalism degree.

His story is not as interesting as the people he writes about, but Timothy has discovered that everyone has one, and good or bad, they all share the same thing; heart.

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BANDS

Actor Joey Pollari is known for his mainstream Queer roles and now, his music

By Timothy Rawles; photos by Mark Stablein

J

oey Pollari has a smile that lights up a room. That might be a hyperbolic idiom, but if you have seen any of his headshots you know what I’m talking about.

From his stint as a teen in the Disney sci-fi hit Skyrunners, to Lyle in the groundbreaking gay rom-com Love, Simon, Joey’s smile is a part of what makes him loveable. It should be insured. But there is one thing he’s not, and that’s typecast.

Joey is also gay. This bit of information is quickly becoming obsolete in the modern world as more and more out actors are not hiding in the closet to protect their images.

I talked to the 26-year-old rising star over the phone about being a quasi-Disney kid, being gay, working in Hollywood, and his new musical project.

What I first noticed about the actor is how soft-spoken he is. His voice has a calming effect and he laughs a lot. It’s comforting when you interview someone so pleasant because the 36

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rapport is natural. Plus, it makes me feel as if all my stupid jokes land the way I meant them to.

His current venture is in the music world with a single called “Fickle” already placing on the charts in streaming apps. But we get more into that later.

Before we started talking about his new album, I wanted to get his take on being so young and openly gay in this new more accepting Hollywood. He says although the industry has progressed since he was much younger, he picked up on LGBTQ themes in movies even if they weren’t fleshed out.

“I look back at movies — movies I was in love with as a kid, and I do see that they have queer coding in them,” he says. “They are kind of progressive in a subversive way. It’s like when the movie cuts to black after two characters start kissing and you’re like, they didn’t show it, but the silence is worse.”

His first major studio role was that of Waffle House server Lloyd in the

aforementioned Love, Simon. Auditioning for the part did not go well, he recalls. “I went in, I said the name wrong, I said the casting director’s name wrong. I was a bumbling mess. I said Hanukkah wrong. They had to stop the scene, and they’re like, ‘okay it’s not Ch-anukkah.’ It was just nervousness.” To his amazement two weeks later they told him he got the part.

There are parts of Love, Simon that are extraordinary for a mainstream romantic comedy, still I wanted to know if he thought it was groundbreaking enough to audiences beyond the intended market.

“I think the movie’s incredible. Full stop, period. Not only for the context that it gives and the space that it resides in. You know, it’s not Brokeback Mountain,” he chuckles.

“It’s not going to be. I mean who knows, in 10 years we might look back and have a very different view of this movie and we’ll see what the movie Love, Simon opened the doors for.”

ENTERTAINMENT

He admits that the movie still makes him cry. “I’m like how amazing to see it as an eight-year-old boy. I mean I would have been moved. I don’t think I would have able to be like, ‘oh yeah and I’m gay’ at eight years old because of the movie, but I think it would have had a certain impact.”

Speaking of impact Joey’s next role was not so sweet. In American Crime season two, he played a young man in a prestigious private school accused of rape by another male student. It’s a role many others would have passed on, but not Joey.

“American Crime came across in my email.

It was just another odd, off the cuff audition.

What does happen though is that I read things and go, ‘I know this really well, I can do this’ if they would give me the opportunity.”

He auditioned for the part and that led to a callback. He says there were a couple of rounds leading up to the screen test. That’s when the magic happened as he puts it. “The muse came down … the whatever. I remember thinking ‘I don’t know if I got this, but I did what I came to do.’” The rest is history.

There is another side to Joey as an artist and that’s his musical one. He may not be able to cast himself in films or television shows, but music is a different story. He is every part of it, from the lyrics to the vocals.

He is narrating from the heart, using the stage name Odd Comfort.

His first single is called “Fickle.” It’s primarily about the men in his life and all the feelings they have imposed on him, good or bad.

“This is largely a song about what I believe a lot of queer desire to be like, and loving men to be like; fickle. Desire itself too — you can take the queerness out because desire is very fickle. Your desire that was there once suddenly disappears. The verses are tracing moments through a relationship.”

Going further into the soul of the song, Joey recognizes that its meaning has a lot to do with his aspirations as well. The desire for something, as he puts it, “is frequent and I have to pull myself back from the edge so hopefully, this song finds some solace.”

The song has no resolve in the lyrical sense, but it does in a spiritual one. The whole album could be interpreted as a linear story about love, life, and loss no matter how you identify, but Joey wanted the focus to be queer-seeing.

“I did name my record About Men, I mean I wanted it to be as queer-forward as possible.

Also the album title is kind of a ruse. It’s beyond a pronoun. A song on the record is called “You Love Him,” it goes beyond that for me. As the record will come out people will see it’s pretty queer.”

Music has always stirred him in the spiritual sense and the transition from camera to microphone wasn’t too difficult. He tells me as a kid he used to stand in front of the ENTERTAINMENT

television and belt out Judy Garland, or the soundtrack to Hunchback of Notre Dame as it was playing. “I used to put a cape on and pretend to be Hunchback, and pretend to be Esmerelda and sing.”

He is not giving up acting, however. He still goes out for things and is still very much a part of that business. He says it does feel good being on his own, “being in control of how it comes across when it comes across, and what those lyrics say. Acting is pretty literal and I think my lyrics, at least in this first single are pretty poetic. You can kinda see where my interest lies.”

About Men is in part about lovers but also on some level the loss of his father. One line in particular, “You’re in the center of me,” is especially telling.

“In retrospect — he’s never gone,” Joey explains of the lyric. “The aphorisms are true: He’s with you — yeah he is. He’s in my memories, he’s in my genes. You know, he’s with me.”

The album will have eight songs in total. Fifteen percent of the money made from the sale of “Fickle” will go to Act Blue, which helps fund organizations fighting racism.

Whether it’s acting in the first mainstream

LGBTQ motion picture or a provocative network television drama, Joey Pollari is making history. And now he’s making music, too.

Coronavirus may be keeping everyone at a social distance away from the things they love, but it’s also allowing for other talents to emerge.

“The industry is at a standstill, which has given me a great opportunity to come home to Minnesota and play a lot of music,” he said with that signature smile. I could almost see it in his voice.

You can listen to “Fickle” under Joey’s musical stage name Odd Comfort on most music streaming services. The album About Men will be released later this year.

Timothy Rawles is an award-winning journalist and California native who moved to Arizona with his husband and two children in 2019. He attended San Francisco State University many years ago and somehow managed to pass math and continue pursuing his journalism degree.

His story is not as interesting as the people he writes about, but Timothy has discovered that everyone has one, and good or bad, they all share the same thing; heart.

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BETWEEN THE COVERS — EXTRA

Charles Leerhsen; photo by Diana Eliazov.

By Terri Schlichenmeyer Mormon religion. He was too fun-loving, too full of mischief and an appreciation for guns, horses, and gambling to settle down – and yet, unlike many Wild West scoundrels, he was well-read, kind and goodhearted which, in the hearts and minds of Old West citizens, set him apart from all the others during his life of crime. Later, though apparently not deceitfully, he began using “Cassidy” as a surname, alternating with his given name.

two different things and, says Leerhsen, it’s possible that Sundance wasn’t Cassidy’s best friend. Their bones may not lie in South America, and historians believe that Cassidy may have been bisexual; indeed, Cassidy’s mother commented on it. About the bank heists, train robberies, and horse thefts: Cassidy was a criminal but was Hollywood correct in portraying him as an “extraordinary human being?”

“Oddly enough,” says Leerhsen, “the answer, it seems, is yes.”

Thankfully, that doesn’t mean a cliched riding-off-into-the-sunset scene inside Butch Cassidy. There’s no such sentimentality here; instead, you’ll find lots of delightful set-yourights and the chance to meet a roguish scoundrel who’s hard to historically hate – a notion that many of Cassidy’s victims would have surprisingly agreed with.

In explaining why that’s so, author Charles Leerhsen shows why Cassidy’s exploits loomed so large in the West but were then largely forgotten for so long.

In this, readers may get the sense that the movie memorializing didn’t please Leerhsen, and that he is no fan of the general Hollywoodization of history.

T

hat man there? He’s just a nice guy.

Kind and generous, respectful and friendly, he’s a true gentleman, and he’s never judgmental. He loves children and animals, truth and honor. He’s a good sport, a good man – and in the new book Butch Cassidy by Charles Leerhsen, he’s a good shot, too.

Eight years before the film Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid was released in 1969, the last of Cassidy’s Wild Bunch “went into the ground.” Her name was Laura Bullion and, says Leerhsen, she was one of a small handful of female groupies who followed the outlaw gang, led by the man played by Paul Newman.

“It was easy,” Leerhsen says “to be smitten

by Cassidy.”

Born Robert Parker in a tiny cabin in Beaver, Utah, Cassidy grew up uninterested in both his parents farm, and his ancestors’

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But that’s one small part of what’s here.

The real appeal of this book – what’s fully half the fun of it – is the sense that Leerhsen isn’t just telling this tale. He’s growling it, grizzledlike, perhaps over campfire and cowpoke stew, surrounded by rustled cattle.

Butch Cassidy: The True Story of An American Outlaw by Charles Leerhsen c.2020, Simon & Schuster $28.00 / $37.00 Canada 304 pages Despite its appeal as an American legend, however, the story of Butch Cassidy and Harry “Sundance” Longabaugh might’ve merely enfolded into history, were it not for Hollywood, although Tinseltown messed with the myth. Reel men and real men were

Absolutely, historians will want this book.

For sure, L’Amour and McMurtry fans will enjoy it. As for lovers of a good tale, well, if you want something different this summer, Butch Cassidy will be a nice change.

Terri Schlichenmeyer, The Bookworm, lives on a hill in Wisconsin with two dogs and 13,000 books. She’s been reading since age 3 and, to this day, she never goes anywhere without a book.

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RECORDINGS

S

ome say music heals the soul. Sometimes I wonder if this is really the case. Or is it that musicians are the ones who need to heal, and our adoration of their output is what really heals them? This month is all about renewing what makes us whole and, in one case, remembering what once was.

By Tom Reardon

Deep Purple — Whoosh!

Stevie D and R. Shipp — Live To Tell I’m a sucker for most music that has the vibe New York Underground poet kind of vibe. Some people derided, for example, the later output of Lou Reed when he just sort of talked his way through songs instead of singing, but I loved it. I also think that Lou never really was much of a singer, but his earlier work definitely had a bit more melody in the vocals.

Stevie D (Steve Davis) and R. Shipp (Robert Shipp) have put a new cd, Live To Tell, on Onus Records and it is really fucking good. With Stevie D handling some very cool spoken word-ish poetry over R. Shipp’s instrumentation, the songs tell stories of characters like “the raven headed one with the praying mantis boyfriend” and the late, great Holly Woodlawn. Usually a bass player, Stevie D comes off as being completely comfortable behind the mic as if he has been delivering these lines forever and his stories are both entertaining and interesting. It is not difficult to close your eyes and see a broken down “Ranchero in front of a house for teen runaways.” R. Shipp provides a compelling sonic back drop to his friend’s stories while providing fans of grungy atmospheric guitar something to enjoy. Check out Onus Records for more information on this new dynamic duo.

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Harry the Nightgown — Self-titled Ever wonder what audio engineers do when they are left alone in the studio? Harry the Nightgown is an answer. The brainchild of Sami Perez and Spencer Hartling, two knob twiddlers with San Francisco’s Tiny Telephone Studios (which was owned by the brilliant John Vanderslice), Harry the Nightgown is the perfect background music for elevating a pandemic-y mood.

Perez’ soothing vocals are the stuff indie rock wet dreams are made of and the two musicians create some killer songs that grow in intensity and catchiness as the record progresses. “Ping Pong,” which is the cleanup hitter here (4th for non-baseball fans) features Hartling and Perez sharing vocal duties and sounds a bit like early Modest Mouse, which is never a bad thing. There are hints, throughout the record, of Beatles-esque harmonies that work over the subtle yet intricate instrumentation. “Talented, they are,” Yoda might say, and the force is strong with these two musical partners.

Now that the pair has moved down south to Los Angeles and are part of Vanderslice’s new Grandma’s Couch studio, it will be interesting to see if there will be more from Harry the Nightgown. I certainly hope so because their debut record is pretty darn great. I just need a nice soft blanket to settle down with while I take this in again and again.

I freely admit that I chose to review this record purely on shock. I was, and still am, shocked that Deep Purple, the band that brought us “Hush” and “Smoke On The Water,” still exists in 2020. What is not shocking is that the album is not good.

Whoosh! Is the first album by the band since 2017 and it is such a departure from those early, classic songs that I mentioned that I am hard pressed to understand why Whoosh! even exists. “Drop the Weapon” features some of the classic Hammond B3 organ sound that the late Jon Lord made famous on those great late 60s/early 70s records. In fact, the best track on this record is “And The Address” which was first featured on their classic debut, Shades of Deep Purple (1968), and that is not saying a lot because it was the weakest song on that record. The only original member of the band left is drummer Ian Paice although bassist Roger Glover has been around, off and on, since 1969. Either way, this is crap. Avoid it like the plague.

(Wait, can you still say that?)

Tom Reardon loves to write about people who are doing something to contribute to our community in a positive way. He also loves his family and family of friends, his pets, music, skateboarding, movies, good (and bad) TV, and working with children to build a better world. Tom’s favorite movie is Jaws, his favorite food is lasagna, and he loves to play music with his friends. He’s a busy guy, but never too busy to listen to what you have to say so tell him a story.

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BETWEEN THE COVERS

By Terri Schlichenmeyer To fully understand this story and where it leads, Trump begins with brief accounts of her great-grandfather, who came to America from Germany in order to avoid military service. After the elder man died, Trump’s grandfather Fred — as she refers to him — became business partners with his mother, and expanded the family fortune.

Trump asserts that Fred was “a highfunctioning sociopath” who put his own selfinterests above everything else. He was cruel for cruelty’s sake and ultimately used that against his eldest son and namesake, Freddy, whom Fred hoped would assume the family business but who didn’t have the heart for it.

When Freddy proved to be a disappointment, Fred turned to Donald, his second son, and gave him free-reign, an open bank account, and the paternal approval Trump suggests that Donald craved.

Once you get this far into Too Much and Never Enough, it shouldn’t surprise you; none of it will, going forward, because you know how this book ends. Long before that, though, Trump shares details of growing up, noting nuances within the Trump sibling group and the family at large, learning to read silences, and hearing regular racist or homophobic comments that made her, years later, keep mum on her marriage to (and subsequent divorce from) a woman. The cruelty, as she describes it, can sometimes read like a TV documentary on wolves at a kill. Disappointment was thick on both sides.

Readers may occasionally note something like sour grapes, too, but even that offers more of an understanding of Trump’s observations. While this memoir somewhat culminates with the fight over Trump’s grandfather’s will, a skewed inheritance, subsequent lawsuit, and the truth she says she found with the urging of the New York Times, the story — as she indicates — won’t begin to be finished until January, or a January four years hence.

Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World’s Most Dangerous Man

by Mary L. Trump, Ph.D. c.2020, Simon and Schuster $28.00 / $37.00 Canada 227 pages

Y

ou hadn’t seen that container in ages.

You really can’t remember when you put it on the shelf. Sometime this year, six years ago, when you moved last? What’s in it must be worth something, though, or you wouldn’t’ve saved it. Now, as in the new book Too Much and Never Enough by Mary L. Trump, PhD, digging may yield answers.

No one has to explain to you who Donald Trump is but, for anyone who’s been completely out of the loop, Mary Trump is Donald’s 42

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niece (she uses his first name, always, and to avoid confusion, so will we). Trump has a PhD in psychology, worked at Manhattan Psychiatric Center while in school, was once a therapist, and taught graduate psychology. The point is, she got chops and it shows, especially when this book — a look at her family and, specifically, her Uncle Donald — reads like something from the True Medicine genre. Indeed, medicallybased passages are nearly emotionless in their clinical nature.

Until then, this is a must-read for left and right alike, but beware that it might leave you feeling mournful — not for any one person, but overall, in general: Too Much and Never Enough just contains a lot of sadness.

Y

ou didn’t need the extra heat.

No, the evening was balmy; it had been all day, but you needed to watch the embers. There’s something about a campfire that’s relaxing, isn’t there? Something romantic about it, too, which means things can heat up or, as in the new novel Camp by L.C. Rosen, things can go all up in flames.

Sixteen-year-old Randall Kappelhoff had been thinking about his plan all winter.

This year at Camp Outland, a camp for ENTERTAINMENT

That may be the first thing you notice, since author L.C. Rosen jumps right into the beginning of Randy’s first week at camp, and the plan. That doesn’t leave much literary foreplay and it makes for a rough opening; fortunately, it doesn’t last and it doesn’t drag.

To the good, the teen angst inside this book is perfect, as is the authenticity of its language.

There’s also a great mix of LGBTQ+ characters, but the story’s neon-sign is the thing most readers will celebrate: to wit: be true to yourself but be careful.

Read the book. As if the ending of it isn’t surprise enough.

Beware: this is a cute story with a strong message, but also contains some pages of explicitness. For older queer teens who need to read, though, Camp is just-right, with a little heat.

Camp by L.C. Rosen c.2020, Little, Brown $17.99 / $22.99 Canada 374 pages queer teens, everything would be different.

He’d cut his hair and change his name — no more Randy, he’d be Del at camp. He’d act totally masculine, sign up for sports, and he’d reluctantly give up performing in the annual play. And at the end of the four weeks of camp, Hudson Aaronson-Lim would be Randy — um, Del’s — boyfriend.

He’d been hot for Hudson every summer for years. This plan had to work.

And it does. At first.

Hudson is everything Del wants: he’s solid, sweet, and his kisses are ah-mayzing. And as much as Del wants to “get naked” with Hudson, he knows he has to wait. Every past summer, while he lusted after Hudson, he watched Hudson find some random boy, let the boy fall in love with him, and then he’d dump said boy within two weeks. That was not going to happen to Del. Hudson would be permanent; he just didn’t know it yet.

But staying in character was not easy.

Del’s cabin-mate, George, brought nail polish to camp but while Randy would wear nail polish, “Del” could not. Everyone in Del’s cabin was really into theater and they were all looking forward to the camp show but “Del” was too masculine for singing and dancing. Still, Hudson was worth it.

Almost everyone in camp knew about Del’s rom-com plans – everyone, that is, except Hudson. Del knew that he’d eventually have to tell Hudson the truth but by that time, he was sure Hudson would be in love with him and nothing else would matter.

The plan had to work.

Until it didn’t.

Okay, this: Camp is adorable. It’s all puppyish first love and awkward kisses and fumbling virginity loss. It can also feel long.

ENTERTAINMENT

H

ave you heard about ... ?

It’s true. You learned it from your best friend’s husband’s boss’s wife at a neighborhood get-together last month and it was confirmed last weekend. You don’t like to spread stories but, well, actually you do because who doesn’t love a little gossip in their life? Who doesn’t crave knowing the skinny about the fat cats? You, nah, you love it, and in Gatecrasher by Ben Widdicombe, you’ll get an eyeful.

The very idea of living in New York City was exciting.

When Ben Widdicombe and his “handsome and naughty boyfriend Horacio” told friends they were moving from Australia to the Big Apple, most were supportive. One, a conman who insinuated that he was of aristocratic descent, even offered them a flat in The Dakota which, of course, never materialized.

This perhaps should’ve been a good indication of what was to come for Widdicombe.

A few minor pays-the-bills jobs and several different apartments later, after exploring their new hometown, getting their bearings, and enjoying the thrill of celeb-spotting, Widdicombe and his boyfriend accidentally moved into a building across the street from the founder of Hintmag.com, one of the internet’s first online-only fashion mags. “... by watching and listening,” Widdicombe says, “I picked up a few things,” which led him and Horatio to suggest a fashionindustry gossip column for the e-zine. They called it Chic Happens.

That was fun while it lasted, and it pointed Widdicombe in the direction of what became a career in society-watching, storytelling, and dirt-dishing. It also gave him a front row seat in an ultimate cultural shift.

Back in the mid-to-late ‘90s, many of this country’s celebrities were “’high-net-worth individuals’” in the process of “becoming embraced as a sub-culture,” he says. When

Gatecrasher: How I helped the Rich Become Famous and Ruin the World

by Ben Widdicombe c.2020, Simon & Schuster $27.00 / $36.00 Canada 305 pages the new millennium arrived, wealth began to be perceived not as something one was born into or worked hard to get, but as a “bold lifestyle choice” which could be enhanced by outrageous behavior and plenty of publicity.

And ultimately, says Widdicombe, this shift in celebrity attitude got us where we are, politically.

Between deliciously dish-y tales and cleverly analogous turns of word, Gatecrasher is one hundred percent delightful to read. Separate from the fun, it’s also informative.

From its first page, there’s very little holding-back in this book, which is gleefully wonderful; even when author and New York Times columnist Ben Widdicombe can’t name names, he offers precise-enough hints that most readers will know to whom he’s referring. In that, we›re whispered-to here, but not pandered-to; pleasantly scandalized but not insulted.

Even better, unlike so many memoirs of this ilk, the life of a gossip columnist isn’t presented as all diamonds-and-champagne: Widdicombe also writes of the frustrations of the industry, the everything-faux realities, and the let-down of clearly seeing both.

You shake your head at the latest in tabloid TV. You sigh at Washington politics. You scan the tabs at the supermarket check-out line, and so this is a book for you. Indeed, Gatecrasher may be the summer›s most fun book you’ve heard about.

Terri Schlichenmeyer, The Bookworm, lives on a hill in Wisconsin with two dogs and 13,000 books. She’s been reading since age 3 and, to this day, she never goes anywhere without a book.

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TALKING BODIES

Fall & winter fitness: Tips for keeping fit in the cooler weather & shorter days ahead

By Kimberly Blaker

W

hen the weather turns colder, days get shorter, and sweaters are pulled back out of the closet, it can be a struggle to keep up healthy habits.

During the fall and winter months, health and fitness routines often take a backseat to staying warm and cozy.

drink and blanket if you’re only accountable to yourself. Finding a partner or a community with similar goals is a great way to keep yourself on track. You can give and receive support, find ways to stay fit together, and remind each other of the benefits of keeping fit.

After a few months of hibernation and holiday indulgences, the pounds, lack of energy, and health consequences set in, reminding us of those long-forgotten fitness goals. It can be frustrating to feel like you’re starting back at square one. Instead of falling into this yearly cycle, read on for ways to avoid the fall and winter fitness slump and to keep focused on staying fit.

While in-person support is helpful, it isn’t always easy to find. But social media makes it much easier to join like-minded people in a virtual community. Do a quick search on social media sites, and you’ll find fitness groups for all levels and interests. These communities provide various ways to keep you accountable.

They’re a safe place to share struggles and successes, provide moral support to one another, and share ideas or tips.

Find an accountability partner or group

Join a gym or class

This is one of the best ways to stay consistent with your fitness goals. It’s much easier to blow off a workout and curl up with a warm 44

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Another way to increase the odds of staying fit through the colder months is by joining a gym or fitness class. This requires a financial commitment, which may be an excellent

external motivator.

Gyms offer many amenities to support fitness goals. These include personal training, a variety of equipment, and often classes you can explore for new ways to stay fit.

Some fitness centers even have extras like childcare, rock climbing walls, saunas, and heated pools. Such perks may help get you out the door on colder days.

If you like to socialize, fitness classes are also a great way to find a community of people who share the same goals. There are all kinds of fitness classes and studios like dance, yoga, and CrossFit. Many offer trial periods. So if there’s a type of activity you’ve always wanted to try, you can do it with little risk and the potential for a big reward. Even many libraries offer free fitness classes.

Work out at home Maybe braving the cold and dark sounds like too much, or working out with other people HEALTH & FITNESS

isn’t your bliss. If so, there are many ways to get in an effective workout at home.

Investing in a home gym is one way to stay active through the colder months. If you have space and money, particularly if other family members want an at-home workout too, purchase the appropriate equipment to fit your needs. It doesn’t need to be elaborate. Just a set of hand weights or a kettlebell can be enough to get you started if you don’t want to commit to large or expensive equipment. However, sizeable used equipment can often be found for practically nothing on Craigslist and elsewhere online.

You can also find thousands of exercise videos and written plans on the internet, DVDs, through your cable provider, or at your local library. There are also video game systems with fun workouts like the Wii Fit or dancing games. Whatever type of exercise or fitness plan you can think of, there are likely at least a few resources out there so you can do it at home. These include exercises with or without equipment. Many are designed for or take into consideration working out in small spaces or with limited time.

Keep it simple If you’re starting from scratch or lack motivation, find small ways to incorporate healthy fitness habits into your daily routine.

For example, take stairs instead of the elevator, park your car farther away in the lot,

How about a hike?

Arizona is loaded with great trails for walking, running, and cycling. Many are dog-friendly, too.

Here are a few sites to help you plan your trek: AllTrails.com AZStateParks.gov AZStateParks.gov AZTrail.org HikingProject.com

and go for a walk during lunch.

You can also start by taking an extra 15 minutes before your shower to do some quick exercises. A daily routine could include bodyweight moves like squats, pushups, and planks. These can have a significant impact on your fitness when done consistently.

Regardless of your fitness goals, you can stay on track throughout the colder months if you find what works best to keep you motivated and consistent.

Kimberly Blaker is a freelance family writer. She also does blog and content writing for a variety of industries and is an expert in on page SEO. HEALTH & FITNESS

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45

NOT THAT YOU ASKED

this year I managed to transport my entire workstation as-is. I simply unplugged it at the office … then plugged it into the wall at home. Having to connect all those wires and cables myself would have led to me being out of a job.

• While on the topic of electronics, I use my smartphone for about six percent of the things it is actually designed to do. I remain suspicious of the “cloud” and something called “Airdrop.” I miss flip phones. Better yet, I miss landlines.

• I often purchase floor models of furniture to avoid having to assemble anything.

If you put Ikea instructions in front of me they might as well be in Japanese, and I understand sometimes they are in Japanese but I’m talking about the English instructions.

Dump Trump and Make America Funny Again

By Buddy Early

W

hen I started writing this column a few years ago, I told the theneditor I wanted it to be light, positive, and uplifting. I also said I wanted it to reflect my own brand of humor. I was cruising along with that intent just fine for quite some time, too. But then somewhere along the way I ran out of things to be light and humorous about.

Donald Trump and the mouth-breathing sycophants who adore him have drained me of my sense of humor. Since the 2016 election it has been a struggle to find things to laugh about. That’s why it is so important to turn things around in November. Sure, this election provides us with the chance to push back against the corruption, abuse of power, idiocy, racism, sexism, intolerance and daily buffoonery; but it’s also the chance for me to get my sense of humor back.

If you’re wondering why a temporary loss of my funny bone is stressing me out so much, it’s because it’s one of the few things I have. Or had. For the most part I have made friends in school (and in adulthood) because of my sense of humor.

In college I fell into a deviant crowd — one that performed sketch and improvisational comedy. After college I got to play with our local ComedySportz team, followed by nearly a decade of making people laugh

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— or cringe — through murder mystery theater. I have always loved making audiences laugh. Making people laugh. Off stage, I was often referred to as so-and-so’s funny friend (who helped facilitate the hot friend getting laid). That’s been my legacy.

I’m worried it’s all gone. Thanks, Trump!

The truth is all the things I have excelled at, all my skills, talents, abilities – they’re purely intellectual: comedy, communication, language, conversation, interpretation, debate. I’ve gotten by in life on those things. Need me to write or “punch up” a speech you’re working on? No problem.

Need me to proofread your short story?

Absolutely. Need to me to get involved in a social media debate and eviscerate your flat-Earther cousin with my wit, five-dollar words and command of complex sentence structure? Done.

Please don’t mistake this for bragging.

On the contrary, I’m trying to convey that, well … this is all I have going for me.

• I’ve never been able to change the oil in my car or install a new battery by myself.

And if you held a gun to my head I could probably change a flat tire. But please don’t do that.

• I’ve relied on others to connect my cable and internet anytime that’s required.

When setting up a home office earlier

• When something breaks, my first action is to see how expensive it is to replace it rather than fix it. I’ve purchased a few laptops for that very reason.

• I’m pretty sure all the artwork hanging in my home is crooked.

• I ordered a belt online in June and it continued to confound me for weeks. I finally figured out how it actually functions prior to filing this column, so I’m going to throw that one into the win column.

Still, I can’t expect to be able to make sense of every belt that comes along.

There will be more confounding belts, more electric razors that don’t do shit because I’m not using them correctly, and more state-of-the-art washing machines with too many confusing settings. I will never escape the reality of my existence: I am deficient of basic skills.

I’m left with my intellectualism and, let’s face it, intellectualism is not appealing without some humor sprinkled in. Nobody wants to hang out with a guy who takes everything so seriously and doesn’t make them laugh. I have become that guy.

America did this to me.

So hear my plea. Run, walk, crawl to the polls on November 3. It is so incredibly important that we return this country to a path of sanity. In doing so, there’s a 98 percent chance I will get my sense of humor back. If not for the other myriad of reasons to send Trump packing that have been catalogued, do it for me and my funny bone.

This was worth a shot.

Buddy Early grew up in Tempe and has been involved in various communities across the Valley since.

He is a former managing editor of both Echo Magazine and Compete Magazine.

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