Echoes December 2012

August 2012

Santa’s Back With A Vengeance 4 5 6

Previous Issue From the Editor Committee News

News

12

A Home Away From Home SPEV Hosts First Ever Mem’s Cookout

13

Introducing... Pulse!

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Ecosoc builds for second sem Saturday CDCs Launched

15 16

CDC Holds Orientation

Feel the App Beat!

Pulse Batch Unites for Apps TBS Apps Get Ready With Eventology 101 Ecosoc Partners With IE Club

Contributors Cocoy Vargas Monty Banta Mikhail Singson

Features

20

Battle of the Brands

22

Featured Story: The Alpha and the Omega

26

Investment Tips from The Viper

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Christmas Seems a Lot Colder Up North

Culture

46 48 49 50

Things I Didn’t Need to Know Thoughts From Places: CCP Tweetable Tweets Gossip G

Editors DEREK PARREÑAS Editor-in-Chief SAM GONZALES Associate Editor RIA TAN Managing Editor HORACE CIMAFRANCA Creatives Editor JOBY GUERRERO News Editor LERIZZE TAN Features Editor JUDITH PASCUAL Culture Editor AYLA REYES Promotions Director KENNETH REYES Webmaster PAULO BAUTISTA Web Editor JUDE GERON Photos Editor VITO CASTANEDA Layout Editor TIMMY JACOB Literary Editor WAX FERRER Logistics Director SOL CORTES Echoes TV Producer RAPHAEL DANTES Arts and Culture Consultant

Staff JANINA RAYMUNDO

Josh Siat Brian Cruz Tracy Miranda

VICO UBALDO CARMELA CALUGAY BRYAN DOMINGO

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Previous Issue

Echoes is the official publication of the UP Economics Society (UP Ecosoc), a non-stock, non-profit, student organization based in the University of the Philippines Diliman School of Economics.

Since the 2nd semester of the academic year 2010-2011, Echoes is released four times in a sem and eight times in a year, on the months of January, February, March, July, August, September, October, and December.

It draws its funding from a subsidy from UP Ecosoc, sponsorships, subscription revenue, and other small funraisers. For this semester, 33 subscription copies, 4 tambayan copies, 1 archive copy, and a complimentary copy for each of our sponsors, featured members, and featured alumni are produced.

This publication is printed by Yza Copy Systems and Trading, located at Stall 22 at the Shopping Center, UP Diliman, Quezon City. contact us

upecosoc@gmail.com upecosoc.echoes@gmail.com visit for more information

upecosoc.org Echoes.PH facebook.com/up.economics.society No part of this publication may be reproduced without permission.

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From the Editor W

ell folks, lookie at Echoes, at it again. This issue, in case you’re reading this before everything else (don’t), deals with consumerism.

Consumerism, aside from Santa, lights, parols, Noche Buenas, gifts, church, and Jesus, lies in the very heart of Christmas.

Echoes looked through the lens of Ecosoc to see how Christmas is affected by consumerism, ‘cause let’s face it, we are very consumer oriented!

(How many fees did we all pay at the start of the semester?)

Many countries around the world celebrate Christmas, and therein lies the banality of it all: Christmas is the season of the Capitalists. Inflation and Christmas sadness aside, no one benefits from Christmas more than those people you buy stuff from. And here we are, celebrating their victory!

That aside, there are more serious matters to waste Ecosoc’s money on for printing. Matters that plague our organization. Not written in spite, but for documentation and posterity, so that mistakes of the past will not, coming from the exercise of this committee’s autonomous status, be repeated for the sake of a better Ecosoc.

Recently, the new Executive committee pushed for a return to centralized creative art advertisements in order to have an orderly process when it comes to advertising and to bring more relevance back to the Secretariat Committee. For these reasons, the executive committee, me included, enthusiastically approved.

Well, I’m writing about it now so its something negative. It’s failing, as of the moment. Blame does not fall on any single person or committee’s shoulders, and

rather than point out the shortcomings, it would be better to give solutions, which Echoes have thought of.

First, create an environment conducive to art and creativity. Unless you’re the most prolific artist of your generation, hence needing little to no inspiration to create art, everyone needs to immerse themselves in a fun social circle geared towards creativity.

That whole “introverted artist” stereotype should just die.

Keeping stuff to yourself doesn’t do any good for anyone, especially if you’re in a committee that craves inspiration.

Also, it need not be said that an environment as such would be fertile to foster friendship. Friendship works, and it’ll attract the right kind of people.

And what is there to work with, if there is no such system in place? Already addressed by the secretariat committee, with the help of pub veterans, Ecosoc should never forget this if it chooses to do away with centralization once more. To create a centralized creatives art advertisement service, a system must be implemented. Forms detailing the nature, the time, the place of the event must be filled. A color scheme for each and every committee must be formulated.

Deadlines should be formalized and people should be assigned. Advertisements, after all, should have deadlines. What use is an over-due poster for an event a day or two away?

Lastly, the whole team responsible for the creation of the products must always be motivated to work.

How? Well, let’s leave that to the imagination. To each his own. Flexibility is always key in such an undertaking.

Of course, Secretariat assures us that all systems will be operational this December so good luck to them.

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COMMITTEE NEWS

The Physician

I was asked over an interview the other day to describe what Ecosoc was for me. I struggled at first for an answer but eventually, I realized right then and there that Ecosoc was the kind of org that offered so much opportunity for her members no matter what skill or talent they had. What makes the UP Economics Society so special lies solely in the kind of members she moulds.

We entered this sem with YOU as our primary goal, and by the end of our term we hope to achieve the stronger membership that this organization deserves. I agree that Ecosoc should be relevant to others outside the org, but I believe that for this to happen, it should always begin when we realize how relevant Ecosoc is for ourselves. We want you to take advantage of the holistic formation that Ecosoc offers, and we hope you can help spread this to all the 250 members we want to reach out to.

GJ | Task Force

More than anything, if there’s one message I’d like you to remember, it’s that I want you to dream, and to dream BIG. Aspire for the higher positions of this org, raise P30, 000 worth of merch, acquire 15 new partner companies, or learn how to make amazing pubmats. Do it now while the opportunity is ripe, because this org offers its members just that.

To the apps: Welcome. I hope you find your home in Ecosoc. Don’t be afraid to talk to the members; None of them bite. Attend the genmeets, attend the commeets, play some Bridge, talk to Paul, basically, feel at home! But never forget to give only you’re very best throughout the sem.

To V5, the craziest bunch of fools I could have ever asked for, thank you for your undying hard-work and for your strong commitment for the job. With Bea’s wit, Neil’s laugh, XP’s hair, Derek’s voice, Quek’s chichi, Geli’s “jokes”, Jing’s cookies, Anon’s aromatic armpits, Yasmin’s loud voice, Ria’s vid making skills, and Ryna’s Ryna-ness, you all make life more enjoyable than it already is. I’ve seen how much you’re willing to give for this org, and I pray that this only grows ever more stronger in the coming months.

The Medical Technician

Hi Ecosoc!

This is really happening, isn’t it? Wow. It is admittedly very strange to be on the opposite end of this commnews business – funny enough, commnews is the one thing (beside layout) that I did not touch with five semesters of being in Echoes. Now I’m writing it! This is so overwhelming. It feels like the first day of school, when everything is so new and scary yet so exciting. For everyone who put me here, wow, guys. You have no idea how thankful and inspired I am.

In a few days’ time, we’re going to be making the rounds in the metro and singing our hearts out for carolling!

Carolling is not only a major fundraiser for the ESSF, it’s also an extremely fun event – where else would you brave the Manila holiday season traffic with your friends to sing in people’s houses, in assistance of the education of four people? Only in Ecosoc, you guys – nowhere else. To our carollers, the Ecosoc choir, I am extremely grateful for your two hour presence for our practices.

It really warms the heart to see you giving your all!

Miguel Andres, all around music man, your enthusiasm and dedication for whipping up the rest of Ecosoc into sounding like actual singers is unparalleled.

BB | Task Force guys, Tee-F is sure to hit that hole-in-one, because you’ve got the force!

Of course, to the loveliest committee ever, hello Task Force! From the get-go of the application for directors and assistant directors, you have all been so impressive.

Your excitement and ideas for this semester’s fundraiser were truly inspiring (as much as this borders on sounding extremely cheesy). Ayla, Mariel, Chello, Loice, Janeen, Justin, Carlo, Jed, Judith, Cath, AK and Gelo—with you

Hi V5! I am always amazed at how much each of you brings to the table and all I can think is that it is my privilege to serve with a bunch of talented and dedicated people. Despite seeing you nonstop since sembreak, I’ve grown quite attached to you! And GJ and Derek, you guys, Echoes represent! We got this, haven’t we?

To Ecosoc, there is so much more coming your way. You guys are some of the most brilliant bunch of people I have ever met. I am humbled by the sheer volume of talent, time and heart that you offer. It’s another semester, with another set of applicants whom I hope will be as awesome as you all turned out to be! To our apps, you are in for a most significant semester of your life. Are you excited yet? Of course you are!

To Hannah and Horace, my heads, my (h)idols, I’m honoured and extremely grateful. Thank you. xoxo, B

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The Doctor-On-Call

HI ECOSOOOOOC! CLEANEST TAMBAYAN FOR NOVEMBER OH YEAH! LET’S KEEP IT UP! KEEP OUR BELOVED TAMBAYAN “CLEAN”!!!!!

AND FILL THE TAMBAYAN WITH SMILES BECAUSE WE DO NOT HAVE A BUDGET FOR CHRISTMAS LIGHTS. <3 I WANNA SAY HI TO MY MEMBERS: ANGEL, CATH, CHRISSIE, DARRELL, DENISE, GERALD, HIMI, IRRA, JANINA, JENA, KEVIN&KYLA, PAT, AND RYAN. I KNOW THIS WILL BE A HEAVIER SEMESTER FOR US COMPARED TO OTHER SECCOM SEMS BUT WE HAVE SHELLY AND ARS YAY!

YASMIN|Secretariat

TO V5 TENTENENTENEN... LET’S NOT BE SICK OF EACH OTHERS’ FACES. I KNOW I’VE BEEN MIA FOR SEVERAL TIMES BECAUSE OF “SICKNESSES” BUT THEY ARE EXISTENT, JUST SAYING. HIIIII. I LOVE ALL CAPS YAAAAAY! <eccoP.S. I’m not on drugs.>

The Surgeon

“Who knew?” Boy have I asked this question a lot of times coming into this semester. All I wanna say is thank you to the people who pushed me this far. You know I’ll give it my all.

So yes, HELLO ECOSOC and PULSE APPS! Thank you for supporting our food sales every week! We hope you were surpRICEd and equally satisFRIED (get it get it?) Thanks for paying your reaff fee’s and if you haven’t, please pay it to your commheads.

Also, watch out for our BINGO happening on January. Start your new year right with the fabulous prizes we’ll be giving away!

To my Finance younglings: Angela, Botan, Alyssa, Aeron, Ana, Abby, Ica, AK, Nikki, Justin, Justine, Justin, Monty, Miguel, Kristina, Patmen, Alex, Bamily, Nina, Paul and Dhiren, I know we’ve got a lot to do.

But trust me, looking at the team we’ve got, we can definitely do this. Here’s to a new semester with you!

To my younger Finance younglings: Drea, Pam, Kaye, Jean, Jan, Tindyl and Alain, welcome to the best sem you’ll ever have with the best people you’ll ever meet. I have high hopes for all of you :) To my VC’s: You are all awesome. Brian, I know we’ve had an awkward beginning and I mention your abundance of hair a lot, but in all honesty, I’m really glad you chose to come on board. Kamille, thanks for being so bubbly and happy all the time, like a bouncing ball of light. You never cease to surprise me with your positivity, maturity and wide range of vocabulary. Louie, I know I always said I chose you only cause I needed a Chinese man for the sake of prosperity in Finance, but it’s really cause I think you’re the best man for the job.

GELI | Finance

To Clingy: remember when we used to get excited when one of us would get mentioned in Echoes? Well, here’s 48 words dedicated to you guys. Thanks for being my first real home here in Ecosoc and for going through the crazy we go through with each other.

And lastly to V5: good Lord how close and important you guys have become to me in such a short amount of time. I never thought we’d get along so well and so quickly and dammit, I’m just so excited for all the crazy things we’ll be facing together.

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COMMITTEE NEWS

The Ophthalmologist

Hello, Ecosoc!!!

First of all, I want to express my sincerest gratitude to everyone who supported me during the election period. I can still remember the first time I read Echoes as an applicant and now, it is my turn to write a commnews.

(KILIG!) Thank you for giving me the chance to serve Ecosoc and I hope that you would appreciate the projects and services of Externals!

Thank you to Mads, Sam, Geli, BB, Romano and Hannah for sharing your knowledge to our applicants and to everyone who attended and supported Eventology 101.

Also, always attend genmeets and be informed with current issues, events and awards of the organization with X-Updates.

Hold on tight, as Externals gives you 2 of the biggest events of the season: Rundown: The 2013 Senate Elections Forum on February 6 and UPfront: The USC Elections Forum on February 20. Come and listen as the candidates express their platforms and arguments.

QUEK | External Affairs

To Externals, you don’t know how much I am thankful for having such a great team. Adriel and Flora, I’m so proud of you! You are only freshmen yet you were able to lead the group for Eventology 101! Good job! Dana, thank you for being our secretary. You always have the initiative to post the minutes of commeet without me asking you to do so. Ines and Kath, I really appreciate your bibbo-ness despite the heavy demands of your acads and getting sick during Eventology. I can see so much potential in you! Arianne, Cathy, Chello, Gio, Jade, KG and Peter, thank you for always supporting me regardless of how busy you are and finding time to listen to my stories/chichis. Ben, Miko and Ria aka my council people, thank you for being active given that you have big responsibilities that you have to fulfil. You may not be always physically present but I am sure that with just one text/call, you will come and help me. Chila, Hannah and Red, thank you for staying with me in the committee.

You do not know how much I appreciate every piece of advice I hear from you. You, will always be my guide! Jiggy and Mitch, see you soon! HAHAHA! To my DJR (Dia, Jo, Ramm), I am so blessed to have you! I cannot imagine working myself working with other people aside from you. Sometimes, I think that you are more workaholic compared to me. Remember, acads first! Hehe!

I love you!

To Pulse Apps, welcome! Congratulations for a job well done with your acquaintance party! I hope that you learned a lot in Eventology 101, which you can apply in your App’s Project and internships. Enjoy your application process! I swear you made the right decision in applying to Ecosoc. Also, shout to Externals Apps, Aila, Erica, Camille, Joji, Rachelle and Sarah! I’m so excited to work with you! I swear you made the right decision to choose Externals!

To V5 (tentenententen!), I am grateful to have you! Tears! We survived the first 2 months! 10 months to go! We can do this! Also, I should have a bonus! I haven’t transformed to Madame Q yet! HIHIHI! Let’s all support Ecosoc events and make this semester a remarkable one. Happy holidays, Ecosocers!

Love, Quek

The Nagbebenta ng Herbal Medicine sa Binondo

Ecosocers: 大家好! (literally: Everyone good) It’s my first commnews! Wow. I feel like a columnist (semi-joke). And, it does feels weird doing this (na-feel mo rin ba ito Von? Haha!). Okay, enough. I’ll probably get used to this soon.

First things first: Before this semester even started, Acad had already started work on improving Ecosoc’s academic database in order to provide a better quality of service to its members. The fruits of this database “expansion” will soon be evident (Acad website). In light of this, I’d like to thank everyone who sent their academic resources to us (either electronically, or by donating books and samplexes). We promise to make your efforts count. Special mention goes to my most outstanding Academic Affairs Committee Alumni, Leus Punzalan, for donating his books despite his hectic schedule! <3 Today, December 12, we’re also having Recognition Day! We won’t only award those who were US/CS last semester. US/CS students from two semesters ago are also going to be awarded! Cool, right?! Congrats to those who did well! For the rest, it’s time to shineeeeee~ shineeee (you keep me shining throuuuughhh – guess the song)!

Also, watch out for the epic Post-grad talk -- partnership forum/symposia between Liai and Acad -- early January! Do support us.

For any tutorial/Acad-related requests or if you just want to text me (this is a joke), you may contact me at 0917-535-6345.

To my committee: Mon, Carmel, and Nikki: I’m really enjoying our work so far! Sana hindi kayo magsawa sa mga meetings and work natin HAHAHA. We have a very very long year ahead of us in our main projects this semester. Hehe. <3 <3 <3 Carlo, Gelo, Bryan, Vico, Jeremiah, Shirra, Shinichi, my VCs, and honorary Acad member Alan Orquinaza: Let’s have an Acad Bonding – lazertag please -- again soon, but now including the rest of Acad (Henny, Chelsea, Aileen, Von (nako), Angeli, Nads, Reg, Topy, Keith, Gab, Chiara (hehe), Diana, Hari, and Iso)! I really had fun with you guys. <3

NEIL | Academic Affairs And finally, to V5: I have no doubt we’ll be able to do this, together. I love you guys. Let’s enjoy our work! :) And now, I end my commnews with a simple quote from one of my most favorite books: “It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important.”

-Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince Interpret that all you want, however you want.

Have a merry little Christmas you all!

Sincerely yours, Neil

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Everyone, thank you for being very supportive of Acad for the past month.

I appreciate every effort put into each of our projects this semester: Recognition Day, Acad Website, PSE Quiz Bee, Acad Library, Book Rentals, Acadernals CDC, and anything else I forgot!

A short but sweet message to my dearest Acad applicants (Lea, Ken, Earl, Saemii, Josh, Jhett, Arbie): I hope you find in Acad what I found in Acad years ago, a place where you grow, belong, and have fun. :)

The Kon-Doctor

LOVE ECOSOC AND IT WILL LOVE YOU A MILLION TIMES BACK. It may be cliché and all but ever since I dreamed to be part of the Execom, I always told myself that I’d start my very first commnews with this line basically because my love for this organization is what pushes me to go beyond what I think I can do for it.

Mushiness aside, HELLO ECOSOC!!! Do you feel the PULSE? I know I do! CDC has a lot in store for you so get ready ‘cause we’re just getting started! More Disneythemed CDCs coming your way! Maexcite!

To my VCs (Carlo, Iya, Pao): Ang galing niyo ,nakakaiyak!

Thank you for always being IYAmazing, PAOtstanding and inCARLOdible! The sem’s just getting started but kaya yan, swear bear! Push lang! Lovezzzzz. <3

XP | Community Development just savour every moment of it! Never hesitate to approach me if you need anything. Kaya yan!

To CDC (Maan, Mark Bue, Mhelajej, Chie, Janine, Migs, Rich, Toni, Tanya, Mark Matibs, Pai, Jenina, Mariel, Bettina, Giselle, Jeremae, Mel, Tong, Pauline, Cuppycakes): I noticed that I often forget saying this so I can’t stress it enough here, THANK YOU ALL!!!! Thank you sa pagtolerate ng pagiging conceited ko. Thank you for never letting me down. Thank you for keeping me sane. Thank you for being insane. Thank you for being oh-so-awesome. Thank you for being you. Thank you for being the BEST YOU. Altogether, UGHHHHHHHH! To my CDC Apps (Magi, Ado, Nepo, Bryan B, Luigi, Anamixx, Bryan M, Shiela): I’m so excited for you! This will be one of the best experiences you’ll ever have so

To V5: We are amazing. Let’s make this the best Ecosoc year yet. I know we can! I know you know we can!

ECOSOC! Check this out: tinyurl.com/letterstocdc Pizawttt! <3 XPogi XPatootie

The Albularyo

Commnews. Wow. When I was an app, I never really imagined writing this. I always looked for my name in Kenneth’s or Horace’s commnews, first thing when I get my hands on Echoes, but not till recently did the thought ever strike my mind.

And here I am, writing it. And laying it out. (I must say, it really feels wonderful to lay out. Well, at the end of it all, at least.) All these pages, toiled hard by the Echoes editors and our writers for your enjoyment, Ecosoc. Also, we got another episode of Gab’s Bro Tips for you next week, and a new Echoes TV serial this January. And I know it’s early but the greatest (and only) second semester Echoes event, LITNIGHT 2013, is coming this February 8! Enjoy it well!

Needless to say, Echoes is the hardest committee to be in, but also the most fun. And with that comes the blessing of having some of the most amazing personalities in Ecosoc, nay, in UP, grace our committee. Ralph the Black Man, you have brought tears to my eyes when I saw you go to our Litnight meeting and when you made tambay. We hope you always come back! My Little Big Sister, Echoes TV is alive and kicking thanks to your vision! Waximilian, your amazing prescence will bring back glory to your sullen position!

The Barbecue Princess, you are always a fixture in Ecosoc! Your insight brings makes everything so much more foolproof. Master Ken, my first commhead and guiding light, your articles will always be heaven sent. I hope I have done well! Paulo Antonio, maaaan, I hope I get to see you and your opinions around more! Here’s to a great Echoes website! Bito, bud, you’re doing great. We are layout brothers now. Judelyn, you should be incredibly happy that all your pictures were used! A feat unaccomplished! Keep it up! Timothy J. Cobb, man, I cannot imagine Echoes without you. The real test has yet to come! J, we hope to see more of you around! Your article may be an amazing step in a new direction for culture. Lerisse, you make me so proud! Pretty soon, you’ll be a master in that craft! JOBY, you are a column in Echoes, and without your system, news would be doomed! Keep doing what you do! Master Horacio, let me thank you here in Echoes for everything you’ve done ever since. We had a wonderful video thanks to you! I hope that this issue is worthy of you! (BTW, your turnover gift came in pretty handy for the cover!) Femme Fatale, always mysterious. Your presence in Echoes brings me a lot of comfort. Thank you for the job well done! I hope you’re doing fine! Samwise the Brave, oh man, oh man, Sam, I would not know what this whole thing would be without you. Your guidance and assitance always helps.

DEREK | Echoes Needless to say, thank you, everyone, for all your hard work.

To our Echoes apps, Bryan, Lisanne, Timi, Frances, your reindeer antlers will be forever immortalized in history. Thank you, and you all did more than I ever did in my first week as an app. MIRA, pal, you get a special shout-out! Keep on doing that thing you do! All of you, good luck in your app process! You picked the “greatest ‘regular’ committee”, in a former EIC’s words!

Pulse Apps, good luck in your app process! Special shoutout to my friends Josh, Orion, and Jhett! Do great!

V5, with this first issue done, it has only just begun, my good friends. Geej and Beeb! Echoes will always be proud of you! Bring our essence into the rest of Ecosoc!

Master Horacio and Master Ken, I will always be grateful for everything that you have taught me, for Echoes, and for life!

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COMMITTEE NEWS

The Doctor of Economics

HELLO BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE OF ECOSOC! <3 For this first part of the commnews, Derek told us to [Insert paragraph about current events, current affairs, or the state of your mind here]. So I asked the other execommers what I could write in this part and Neil said, “write a poem JOKE HAHA.” Then I thought, that’s actually good idea! So I will write a haiku: First commnews, YIPEE! Go Ecosoc! Go Liai!

This sem will be WOAH THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING THE ALUMNI PRIVILEGE CARD! To those who haven’t ordered, go na! We have new partners for 2013: Roku, Euphoria, Music 22 and a lot more! So go get an alumni privilege card!

For our upcoming events: CDC with Alumni will be on December 15!

We will be inviting an alumnus to give a short kabuhayan seminar for the Pook Ricarte parents and guardians. Attend that CDC session, mmkay? And if you have alumni relatives, let them know too! Also, we will be having a Seminar on Graduate Studies, in partnership with Acad. It’ll be a good opportunity for you to know the possible paths you could take after college. We are inviting 3 alumni speakers to represent the different graduate programs: Law, MBA, and MA/PhD. If you know of an alumnus who can be a possible speaker for this event, approach me or Sel Del. Now, my thank you-notes:

JING | Liaison

To my ever-reliable Cuatro Marias, Mabel, Telle, Cel and Sel, I am so thankful for you four! It’s a blessing to have you as my VCs. Good call talaga na Liai has 4 VCs this semester hahaha! But really, your four have been so amazing. With your skills and your workmanship, I’m glad that you guys did step up. The sem just started, and already you guys have proved to be so awesome.

To my Liai loves: Irene, Jess, Shanica, Nicolle, Bea, Cj, Cyril, Dea, Marte, Gel, Erwin, Anj, Ryan (yes ryan HAHA joke lang, Porn), Patty, Simon, Karla and Jus, I know that our work and the tasks assigned have been very challenging but thank you for your passion and your willingness nevertheless. I am privileged to be leading a team of such a wonderful mix. We will end this sem with a bang! I just know it <3 I’ll take this time na rin to give a special mention to Jus, because she deserves it! Thank you for being so bibo! And for being our master video maker! Keep it up, girl ;) I’d also like to take this time to welcome our Liai Pulse Apps! To Christine, Catricia, Ida, Eina, Lyon, Ian, Maegan, thank you for choosing Liai! Yaaaay <3 You made the right choice! (hehe) I assure you, you won’t regret it. We promise to give you the best and the most unforgettable experience. I look forward to getting to know each one of you more.

To V5, thank you again for allowing me to be part of this execom term. I will always be grateful that despite not being an execom-elect, you welcomed me the same – with warmth and much enthusiasm.

Thank you for opening my eyes to a privilege that I may not have realized right away. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to make a difference, to serve. I am honored to be working alongside each one of you, you who have become more than just my colleagues – but my family. ANG DRAMA HUHU PERO SINCERE YAN, PROMISE! See you guys around. Besos y abrazos!

The Doctor Love

ANON | Membership events fun and meaningful. I hope we can maintain this kind of energy throughout the semester!

Sup Ecosoc? First of all, I’d just like to say that wow it feels good to be writing my first ever commnews!

Maybe this will be the first and last time that I will ever have this feeling (since I never really liked writing stuff, especially those with deadlines) but still, having this opportunity of writing to all of you as a chairperson is really special. Hello to all the people who helped bring me to where I am now; your support is something that I am very thankful for each day. To the whole organization, I look forward to spending time with you guys in the future. I may not know each one personally, but know that you guys will always have a friend in me (yeahhhhhhhhh).

Whassup GJ, BB, Neil, XP, Derek, Quek, Geli, Jess, Yasmin, Ryna, and Ria? Congratulations to us for making it this far! (well, kakastart pa lang natin hahaha) Still a long way to go, but I’m looking forward to spending more time with you guys.

Congratulations to those who have accomplished some of their events for this sem already! Actually when you think about it, parang sobrang bilis lang talaga ng oras. Pretty soon we’ll find ourselves done with all our events and done with our term, so let’s just enjoy each day but of course let’s not forget to give our all for this organization.

Whassup Memcom? Thank you for all the help and support you guys have given since the start. Good job for a very successful Apps Orientation and Apps TBS! This also goes out to everyone who attended Apps Or and Apps TBS. Thanks for making both

Whassup Pulse Apps? On behalf of the whole membership, I’d like to welcome you all in Ecosoc! Being an applicant is one of the best experiences you can have, so make the most out of it and get to know each member if you can. You’ll find that each one has an interesting story to tell that can help you throughout your app process or in your life as a college student. Don’t forget to accomplish your tasks, attend your events, and interact with the members. By doing so, you’ll be an official member in no time. But most of all, just enjoy being a part of Ecosoc! As the saying goes, love Ecosoc and it will love you back.

That’s all for now! See you guys around!

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The Doctor Poison Ivy

RYNA | Special Events a warm welcome to the BEST.COMMITTEE.EVER.

Hello beautiful people of Ecosoc!

It’s so weird that I have to write commnews now! Just last sem, I didn’t even bother reading this part! I just looked at the execom’s photos and looked for my name!

So I won’t take offense if you just want to look at my face and not exactly read what I have to say. Although sometimes I say really good stuff, let’s just hope this is one of those moments.

Anyway, I’d like to thank all those who attended Mem’s Cookout last November 16! To those that didn’t attend, you missed a lot of fun! There was truly an unlimited supply of bbq, laughter, and FUNNNNNNN! You also missed seeing the sexy chefs, a.k.a. the beautiful committee that is Spev!

Also, Christmas is fast approaching! We know what that means!! ECOSOC CHRISTMAS PARTYYYYYYYY! Let’s make this Christmas a good one! Don’t forget to sign up for Kris Kringle! Don’t be a scrooge! If you’re having a cold Christmas let me, I mean, ECOSOC warm it up for you.

I would like to give a special shout out to each and every single one of my beautiful committee! To my super ferosh VC’s Ayi and Josh, I hope you don’t get tired of my utos!

A super hyper hi to my members, crush ng bayan Cara, super hipster Bruno, supah fierce Kiele and IssaVils, inseparable Andee and Pau, foreva high Angelica, batak boys Pito and Jason, my Mama Jacques, Jaya-bells, ang nawawalang Kat, Kelvin Tagpines, tall white chick Klaud, my fellow AA girls Loice and Nors, tall not-white dude Mark, and last but not least, lots of junk in the trunk, Romano! To my apps, Zo, Toni, Mara, Krissy, and John,

TO V5: Hello you weirdos! What the hell can I say to you guys? I’m tired of yer faces already! Just kidding! I love you all! Huhu. Even if someone made me cry already(EHEM EHEM) I’m looking forward to working with all of you this semester!! Love you all. <3 <3 So that’s my first commnews ever(tear)! Hope you all have a good sem and a good new year ahead of y’all!

Love, R

The Pediatrician

RIA| Sports

Hello Ecosocers!

Join us as we bring you fun and exciting activities this semester! Watch out for the return of your favorite sports events like Members Bersus Applicants and Battle Royale! Get ready for 2013, as we bring you more Sports Workshops/Jogging Sessions, competitions inside and outside the organization, and other activities that you wouldn’t want to miss!

Sports are for everyone, so don’t be intimidated/ scared/shy/hesitant to join our activities! Make sure that you are aware and well informed through our weekly fitness and health trivia! Also, thank you to those who answered the sports survey!

To the awesome Sports Members: Adrian, Bing , Boz, Cesca, Cheska, Cheska, CV, Cyvil, Dustin, Erol, God, Janeen, Joc, Joseph, Luis, Miguel, Mik, Mike, Nathan, Raya, Rino, Tikay. I’m very thankful that I have all of you guys in Sports this semester!

Welcome back/Welcome to Sports! Thank you guys for all the help and support that you’ve been giving me so far! Let’s all have an awesome semester together! To Ate Janeen: I’m very thankful for all the ecosoc/sports guidance and help that you’ve been giving me ever since I was your app last year!

Wouldn’t be writing my first commnews right now if it weren’t for you!

To the very hardworking and dedicated (yet sabaw) Sports VC’s: Mike Saulo and Erol/Tracy Miranda, thank you for being the very active VC’s that you are and for always being there to help out! Lucky to have you two as my VC’s!

To the Sports Applicants: Astin Padlan, Carlo Paguio, Miguel Ramos, and Orion Besabe, Welcome to the most awesome committee and family ever in ecosoc! Sports will surely take good care of you guys this sem, so do your best in your app process and never give up! Remember to enjoy your app process! Love kayo ng sports! Good luck!

V5: *tanan-tan-tanaan-tan-tan* Hi guys! The past month and the sembreak with you guys have been great! I’m really thankful that I’m in this with all of you guys! <3 Merry (almost) Christmas and Happy (almost) New Year Everyone! :D

11

INSIDE ECOSOC

A home away from home

BY JOBY GUERRERO

L

ast October 23 to 25, the newly formed Execom brought the members home to the organization’s plansem. It was held at Louisse Private Resort, a beautiful resort situated in Taytay, Rizal.

Over 50 members have attended the plansem. It hosted different activities that bonded the members for the coming semester ahead. SWOT analysis for the former and recent Execom was done. Each committee’s SWOT was also accomplished. The first gathering of each committee was also

held. The Execom also presented the semester’s theme, “Pulse.

One beat. One Ecosoc.”

Of course the plansem was a time, not only for work, but also for play. The members had fun in the teambuilding session c/o memcom. Bonding sessions over swimming, movie time, playing billiards and karaoke also commenced.

All in all the plansem was a very productive one and it was a great way to start the new sem.

Spev hosts first-ever Mems’ Cookout N

BY JANINA RAYMUNDO

12

ovember 16 was no ordinary Friday night for Ecosoc members.

After attending the semester’s first General Meeting and CDC Orientation, everyone headed to 27 Roces Avenue in Quezon City for the first-ever Mems’ Cookout (or at least, the first in recent history).

It was an event organized by the Special Events committee. The mems cooked up some tasty grilled goodies, such as barbecued liempo and corn on the cob--even grilled zucchini. The venue also housed a covered court, where members bonded over games of badminton and basketball. There were also performances

by Jude Geron, Adriel Arguelles, and Miguel Andres. Mems’ Cookout was a great opportunity for members to just chill and unwind at the start of the semester.

It was a night of good food, and even SPEV Mark always has that look on his face greater company.

Introducing… PULSE!

BY VICO UBALDO

T

he first genmeet for the semester was held on December 16 at room 127 School of Economics. This is the time when we officially welcome all the Ecosocers for an exciting new semester. Also, the theme of Ecosoc for this semester which is Pulse: One Beat, One Ecosoc was released.

As GJ Agregado explains, all the members are the blood of the organization, and we should all move with one beat.

One thing all the mems look forward to is to see the new Execom in action. Introducing GJ Agregado, Bea Bayudan, Yasmin Sehob, Geli Medida, Queennie Mindanao, Neil Ong, XP Damian, Derek Parrenas, Jessica Biscocho, Paolo Añonuevo, Ryna Claro, and Ria Tensuan! It’s really JUS Getting ready for her career as a pop star good to hear our new leaders to speak after their hard work planning for Ecosoc over the semestral break. Each committee also had a special video which presented their members plus some of their activities for the semester. (The Seccom video, however, gave tips on how to keep the tambayan clean. Which is cool.) The genmeet had a lot of attendees (around half are new members) and the room was filled with excited mems.

CDC Holds Orientation; Means Business

BY CARMELA CALUGAY

T

XP Thousands watched as XP sang at his farewell concert

he well-attended CDC Orientation last November 16 made CDC’s rules quite clear. The orientation focused on attendance, tardiness, blacklist rules and this semester’s theme.

The theme for this semester is Disney wherein the kids and the Ecosoc family will interact on fun-filled activities inspired by well-known and loved stories.

The blacklist and tardiness rules were also discussed by the CDC members. New rules includes a payment of P5 for every minute late of the allotted time. Meanwhile, one is considered as blacklisted if he or she is late for the allotted grace time.

There is also a penalty of half-count for the succeeding CDCs after the maximum of 2 blacklists. Blacklist rules also include not attending the CDC you signed up for without permission and replacement, your replacement did not come and was considered absent in a CDC because of tardiness.

The CDC orientation was held after the First Genmeet of the semester.

13

INSIDE ECOSOC

Ecosoc builds for the second sem

BY CARMELA CALUGAY

GK BUILD GJ really likes watching paint dry

T

he first CDC this semester was well-spent with our new beneficiaries, GK NTC Pinag-isang Palad. The morning of November 19 was filled with positivity as mems met up at 9 in the morning to help.

The mems painted the newly built houses followed by the much-anticipated boodle lunch. “Maganda yung progress nila. In two weeks’ time, ang dami na nilang na-accomplish,” XP, the CDC chairperson said. He also noted that all houses on the community are expected to be built during this term and that we can see the fruits of our labor.

There will be 6 GK Builds this sem with 1.5 counts each.

Saturday CDCs launched with ‘Despicable Me’

BY CARMELA CALUGAY

MASTER AND PUPIL Adriel Arguelles schools a his young padawan in the ways of the force.

T

he first Saturday CDC last November 24 was attended by more than 40 eager members with the theme of Despicable Me. The simulated activities were caroling and storytelling.

The kids and mems were divided into two groups as they sang together to the tune of Santa Claus is Coming to Town and Pasko na naman among others. There was even a minipresentation done by each group. They sang and danced with

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help of the mems.

After the presentation, the kids were entertained with a story told by Lerizze Tan, Ria Tan and Mark Buenaventura entitled Ang Batang Walang Pasko. The story was well complemented by creative props and clever voicing of the team.

The activity ended with a snack for the kids.

The first Saturday CDC was co-sponsored by Echoes and Task Force.

Feel the Appbeat!

BY VICO UBALDO

O

n November 24, the UP Economics Society officially welcomed this semester’s Pulse applicants, with an Applicants’ Orientation aptly called Appbeat. This orientation was a really great time for Ecosocers to meet the applicants and make them feel more comfortable to stay in their new home.

Here’s the battle plan. First, the applicants gathered in the tambayan where they were blindfolded and let to SE 127.

Upon taking off their blindfolds, the Ecosocers greeted and cheered for the applicants, complete with banners and flags.

Cocoy and Carmel hosted the event, where they eventually introduced the nine committees of Ecosoc, complete with introductory videos. There was also an icebreaker game where applicants were blindfolded and had

to find their own “herd” through the animal sounds they randomly chose to imitate.

Of course, who can forget the different booths! Liai and Spev prepared a game where the applicants had to transfer water from one container to another using a sponge. The catch is that you can only step on each other’s feet! Task Force and Echoes then made a “guess the song” game, where the first group to guess three songs right wins. Finance and Seccom made a game where you had to transfer puzzle piece using only certain body parts. CDC and Acad had “pulse-tintero,” a game of patintero with a twist. Finally Sports held a game of dodgeball where the losers have to drink an icky egg mixture.

Overall, everything was prepared well, everyone had loads of fun, and the members got closer to the applicants.

Pulse Batch unites for Apps TBS

BY BRYAN DOMINGO

T

he Pulse Batch opened their semester-long application process with the Applicants’ Team Building Seminar (Apps TBS), their first official batch bonding, on the 29th of November 2012 at Quezon Hall.

The Pulse Apps were asked to know all of their co-apps’ full name and a “fun fact” about them, before reaching their destination, while they strolled at the Academic Oval from the School of Economics.

Upon arriving at Quezon Hall, they were randomly paired up and had to tell each other’s name and fact. The activity was immediately followed by another to which they shouted their

assets and insecurities to help them boost their confidence with their peers and to which they had to overturn a blanket where all of them are in to establish cooperation and camaraderie.

Lastly, each applicant had to do the trust fall, relying on their co-apps to catch them.

However, despite having 57 applicants, a huge number for the second semester’s application, only about 40 apps participated in the said event.

Prior to the Apps TBS, the applicants were officially introduced to the members of the Ecosoc thru App Beat Orientation on the 24th of November 2012.

15

INSIDE ECOSOC

Apps get ready with Eventology 101

BY VICO UBALDO

O

ne cool and useful event for Ecosoc applicants is Eventology 101. For the Pulse applicants, it’s their time to get their creative juices running for this seminar they’ve been waiting for.

The event had some vibrant speakers to talk about their specialty in the art of event-making. Mads Salazar talked about logistics, Sam Gonzales about publicity, Geli Medida about marketing, Romano Alonzo about sales, and Bea Bayudan about external relations.

After some lunch, the applicants had a simulation in order to apply what they learned that morning. Split up into groups, their challenge was to come up with a fund-raiser event, specifically for a scholarship program. Thus, the apps got to test their planning skills to come up with their awesome event. After this, the applicants had a team-building activity that involved that “landmine” game we all know. In the end, Hannah synthesized everything and wrapped up the show for the day.

MAN There is nothing funny in this picture

Ecosoc partners with IE Club for Ibang Klase

BY JANINA RAYMUNDO

D

uring the weekend of November 17 to 18, Ecosoc joined the UP Industrial Engineering Club as a partner organization for Ibang Klase, a collective effort to repaint, repair, and rebuild Masambong High School in Quezon City.

UP IE Club was also joined by another 100 organization partners, including the UP Architecture Forum, UP Chinese Student Association, and UP Psychology Society, just to mention a few. They were also joined by organizations from other schools, such as the DLSU Industrial Management

16

Engineering Society and the Ateneo Management Engineering Association. Over a span of two days, volunteers were able to donate medicines and wall fans, and paint the school’s first floor hallway, four classrooms, and over a hundred chairs.

This year’s Ibang Klase marks UP IE Club’s fifth school rehabilitation. Past renovations were made in public schools such as Old Balara Elementary School, Pinyahan Elementary School, Culiat High School, and Tandang Sora Elementary school. This project aims to help improve the situation of public schools in the Philippines, one school at a time.

NEWS

Sponsored by Inquirer Philippines

A LUCKY SHOT? The aftermath of the punch that fell a champion and shocked the world, last Sunday, December 9, 2012.

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NEWS

NEWS BY

NUMBERS

BY JOBY GUERRERO

7.1 138

the increase, in percent, of the Philippine’s GDP last quarter. It is the fastest growth in two years.

countries including the Philippines voted for the upgrading of the membership status of Palestine in the United Nations. The Palestinian autonomous government was given a “nonmember observer” state status.

15,000

people in Mindanao and Visayas are duped in the recent Php 12 Billion pyramid scam. The NBI identified the deceitful company as Aman Futures Group Phils Inc.

647

the number of deaths caused by the recent typhoon Pablo. Pablo is believed to be the strongest typhoon that had hit the country this year.

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6

the round when Manny Pacquiao lost during his fourth fight against Juan Manuel Marquez. Marquez knocked out Pacquiao during the round.

2,700,000,000 amount, in dollars, of the damages given by a Mexican court against Yahoo for a breach of contract that involves a yellow page service.

3 9

1

suicide car bombs were used to target the US-Afghan base. The attack killed 3 Afghan soldiers and 2 civilians. people are reported to be dead after a major road tunnel collapsed in west of Tokyo. Loose bolts are believed to be the reason behind the incident.

Filipino died of burns from an oil rig fire in the Gulf of Mexico. One Filipino is also believed to be lost at sea due to the explosion of the oil platform.

FEATURES Sponsored by Business World

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FEATURES

BATTLE BRANDS OF THE

Good brands or bad brands, we all know that competition happens.

BY COCOY VARGAS

T

he American Marketing Association describes a brand as the “name, term, design, symbol, or any other feature that identifies one seller’s good or service as distinct from those of other sellers.” Any person taking up BA 170 can easily tell you that it is a brand which defines a product, gives it its identity, and sets it apart from others in the market. Or at least that’s what I think what marketing majors would say. Anyhow, I have been tasked by the most venerable editorial board of Echoes to examine a select range of goods and for each of them, scrutinize two different brands side by side. This is a rigorous yet heavily biased examination of different brands based on the sole judgment of this author. If you find yourself disagreeing with what’s written here, you can go pack yourselves (in a bag).

NIKON VS. CANON This has been the endless debate among photography enthusiasts—legit and poseur alike—which brand is the best when it comes to cameras? Nikon and Canon are the two giants in the DSLR market, or should I say, the market for digital single-lens reflex cameras. Yep, I also only found out what DSLR meant just now.

Frankly, I don’t give a damn about which camera shoots better. What matters to me is that I look good in the shot, regardless of the brand being used. To help me gauge which is the bigger giant, I had to find out from the world’s leading photographers which among the two they preferred using.

Patrick Demarchelier, who some may remember as one of the guest photographers in America’s Next Top Model Cycle 15, uses a Nikon. Plus point for Nikon. Annie Leibovitz of Vogue fame uses a Canon. We’re neck and neck! However, Annie Leibovitz did mention that the best camera in the world is the one that you have in your hands right now. In a weird twist of events, your iPhone camera wins this round.

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SANUK VS. CROCS Sanuks are allegedly not shoes but sidewalk surfers. If that’s so, then Crocs must be the most horrifying things to live off the feet of a human being. That argument made no logical sense whatsoever, but it does convey my point. Do not ever wear Crocs, unless you’re Mario Batali. When you find yourself wearing them, do yourself a favour and stay away from escalators for your own safety. Do yourself another favour and stay away from me.

I won’t wear them, but Sanuks look definitely less appalling than Crocs (and by Crocs, I mean the stumpy one that look like a cave). In fact, some designs actually look quite nice. You might want to wear them if you want to look like a trippy hippy of sorts.

Without a budge, I give this round to Crocs. Insert chos here.

CARELINE VS. EVER BILENA The local cosmetics industry is dominated the two beauty juggernauts Careline Cosmetics and Ever Bilena. Both are leaders in providing expertly crafted products for the enhancement of Filipina beauty, continually filling out and selling out shelves in drugstores and supermarkets. These two are the fiercest competitors in the Philippine beauty market, and continue to hold an oligopoly.

And that was just one big fat chos. I don’t really think Careline and Ever Bilena dominate the cosmetics market in the Philippines, and they definitely don’t have an oligopoly in the industry. However, I can say that Ever Bilena appears as a frontrunner in this race. One beauty expert, also known as my first cousin, mentioned that Ever Bilena cosmetics have nearly that same quality and consistency as expensive foreign brands of makeup. If ever you need a cheap alternative for cosmetics, Ever Bilena will probably be a wise choice. The Sex Bomb Dancers certainly agree with me. Get get aww!!!

BENCH VS. PENSHOPPE The starpower of Bench is undeniable, having the country’s biggest actors, actresses, singers, models, reality stars, and famous nobodies under their belt as endorsers. Their starpower even transcended overseas, with a long list of international endorsers that includes Dao Ming Si, er, Jerry Yan of Meteor Garden fame, Jasmine Trias, Bruno Mars, David Archuleta, Joe Jonas, Michael Trevino, and Adam Levin.

When Bench gets foreign celebrity endorsers, Penshoppe immediately follows suit as any bitter rival would. Or was it the other way around? Regardless of who did what first, Penshoppe is the clear winner here, since they got endorsers who are actually relevant, A-listers, and not reality TV stars (we don’t see Jasmine Trias dancing hula anywhere now don’t we). Every becky across the archipelago jumped and shrieked in delight when they saw Zac Efron and Mario Maurer grace billboards and shops everywhere (this author included). However, Penshoppe gave Bench a run for their money by getting One Direction.

Now if only they could get Zayn to wear just briefs...

Moreover, Penshoppe generally has nicer stuff (not stuffs) relative to Bench. But don’t get me wrong, I still won’t be caught dead wearing either.

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FEATURES

THE ALPHA AND THE OMEGA INTERVIEW/LERIZZE TAN & AYLA REYES WORDS/LERIZZE TAN PICTURES/JUDE GERON

E

cosoc cares. Ecosoc’s home. Ecosoc is family. JR found himself stumbling for words while attempting to describe the organization very close to his heart. He was lost for words not because he didn’t know how to describe his second home, but because he didn’t know how to describe it the way it should be. JR’s passion for Ecosoc was evident throughout the interview. Despite the sudden outbursts of laughter, he had his head straight whenever he talked about the organization. He always had a lot of great ideas and insights about the organization, and talking about it seemed to be a big delight to him. The former membership committee chairperson was once challenged, once successful, one questioned, but always passionate.

graduated 3rd honors and received the blue eagle award in 2010, and thus began his college jaunt.

COLLEGE YEARS

His parents, Jocelyn and Rene currently manage their own taxi rental business. If you haven’t guessed it yet, that was where he acquired his nickname, JR. Jose Yambao III is the youngest of 4 children. When he was still an infant, he fell down from a table and was believed to have been caught by his guardian angel, hence he did not shed a tear.

It seems that it was by mere fate the JR became a UPSE student. Unlike many Ecosocers, entering UP wasn’t JR’s first choice. Actually, it wasn’t his second either. Originally planning to enter Ateneo, JR was greatly dismayed when he found out that he did not make the cut. He only took three exams wher he passed both UP and La Salle. At that time, DLSU seems to be the next best thing since most of his friends planned to study there, but UP’s easy on the pocket tuition and his parent’s convincing words drew him in. If you think that that’s when everything fell into place, you are wrong. BS Economics was not JR’s first choice. In fact, in wasn’t in his choices at all. Not having made it to his 1st and 2nd choices which were Business Administration and Business Economics, made his decisions even more difficult.

That was when fate went to work. After a few months of waiting for which course choice he was admitted into, JR was elated to find out that he got in to Business Economics.

EARLY EDUCATION

FINDING ECOSOC

JR spent half of his life in Collegio San Agustin, Makati. His parents enrolled him there for kinder, and he later on ended up graduating in the same school. During his Senior year, JR was part of his school’s basketball team. He was also the auditor of the student council. JR managed to enter the honors class despite his many extracurricular undertakings. He eventually

JR didn’t have any special or extraordinary reasons to apply for Ecosoc. His decision to apply was mainly driven by a conversation with his blockmates where they talked about joining an organization in their home college. On his own account, he chose to join because of the bright and bubby attitude of the members during their freshman orientation. He reckoned that

A BRIEF BACKGROUND

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On JR: Polo shirt by Jomac, Pants by Dockers, Flannel shirt by H&M, Santa hat by BB, Watch

by Omega

ITS CHRISTMAS, LETS HAVE FUN Apparently, it’s more ridiculous to wear a santa hat than reindeer antlers Ecosoc would also serve as a great way to widen his network.

His plain decision to apply immediately blossomed into something remarkable. From the very beginning, JR did not disappoint. He started as a sports committee applicant, then a SPEV intern, and then he competed in the Grand Tradition for Membership (mostly because of peer pressure). He was then awarded as one of the top applicants of the Blueprint app batch. Immediately after, he became vice chairperson of the committee he dressed in drag for. A year after he was inducted, he was appointed as the chairperson of the said committee. When he was asked why he didn’t run for the position, he had a simple response--fear. He was scared that he wouldn’t match people’s expectations. Funny though how this fear didn’t show JR’s cowardly side, but instead showed how passionate he truly is about the organization. The name and sake of the organization was always at the top of his concerns.

Sighted for his passion, the execomm

turned to JR to become the membership committee chairperson. JR was hesitant at first, but a text message from Cocoy changed his mind. The text message talked about his potential and moreover, his heart for ecosoc and how he cares for the organization. JR’s soft spot for the organization was again touched, and thus he accepted the position. Although he had some regrets about his term, he still felt a great sense of fulfillment in doing his job. Afterwards, JR confesses that he had no more plans of venturing further up the ladder of positions since he was emotionally, physically and financially drained.

of fact he also plans to apply as an ad hoc director next semester. Academics are something JR would surely not let loose on either. For the next year, he plans to retain his Cum laude standing.

FUTURE PLANS

ON BECOMING THE FEATURED MEMBER

Immersed on orgwork and academics, JR admits to have neglected himself during his first few semesters in UP. This semester he plans mainly to keep the balance that he was only recently able to establish. This doesn’t mean though that he has plans to become inactive. As a matter

ON THE WOLFPACK MONIKER When asked what he thought about the wolfpack moniker, JR threw his own question in: How do people perceive it?

“We’re just friends” he says. He thinks that it’s cool although it is somehow cliquish and thus sends out a negative image since most of them are members of the membership committee.

JR claims that winning the coverspot came to him as a surprise. He thought it was just a joke, but it wasn’t. He was even unaware that the bidding in the Ecosoc group was legitimate, and it shocked him a bit to find out that Ben would actually

23

ON HIS MUSCLES Again, JR didn’t directly answer our question at first. He claims that he isn’t actually muscular and, as a matter of fact, he finds himself skinny. He also believes that people only talk about his muscles to be sarcastic or to tease him, sarcastically.

Just to answer the question though, he goes to the gym at the university hotel on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and if he finds time on the weekends. Adding to that, he eats right after his workouts. He says tries his best to eat a lot. For cardio, he also plays basketball. JR also watches some videos to motivate himself. He aims to get his weight up to 145 or at least 140 pounds.

TO THE ECOSOCERS JR wishes for Ecosocers to have the organization etched in their hearts. He believes that serving the organization and being in the organization goes way past just accomplishing the tasks that you have to do. Ecosoc is not all work. According to JR, Ecosoc is the place where your true friends are, where you could always find good company and people who care about you. It is in Ecosoc that we find an array of people with different backgrounds, and thus learn from them. “I grew as a person in Ecosoc”. JR believes that Ecosoc is a place for growth, a place to become a version of you, and maybe even a place to find yourself. “We need to give back, and if we do, I’m sure we’ll have no regrets”.

BUTTON THOSE BUTTONS JR always sets the trends pay for his feature.

ON DESIGNER BRANDS AND CLOTHING IN GENERAL JR hesitated to answer our questions on designer brands since he didn’t want to give off an elitist vibe. We had to do a bit of explaining on our theme to get him to respond. Like many of us, JR enjoys designer brands. He likes buying shoes, in particular.

His brand choices include Topman and Fred Perry for clothes, New Balance, Nike and Adidas for Basketball shoes. He says he usually buys what other “kids” are wearing although his friends believe him to be more of a trendsetter.

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SOME FUNNY (And not so funny) LITTLE SIDENOTES: -Ben is unable to answer why he voted for JR -At the start of the interview,JR asked to translate into English although he spoke in English the entire time -At some point in the interview, JR and Ayla begin talking about some “Ziz” and I had absolutely no idea what they were talking about -JR would also like to take his fans out to dinner some time

THE SPEV LIFESTYLE REVEALED

FUN FRESH &FIERCELY REAL.

BY RAPHAEL DANTES

I

f there’s anything pop culture— mostly reality television, the TLC and MTV kind—taught us, it’s that you can’t keep people with no shame down for long. The lurid and intoxicating tales of people falling flat on their faces, or worse, on other people’s faces as they revel in their liquor-induced trance make for some of the best tambayan anecdotes.

This is the kind of behavior SPEV can cause with the members through their events, which are never short of dramatic flair and spirited fun. One only needs to watch the glorious antics of repressed students let loose in Vice Night to realize that SPEV brings the best kind of the worst in Ecosocers in the right environment, and it’s almost always shamelessly good.

Due to the nature of the committee’s activities, SPEV has earned a reputation for being the feisty bunch that’s no stranger to all sorts of debauchery. Many people in Ecosoc have come to view SPEV as a solid collective artifice, an artifice that seems impenetrable to other Ecosoc members because of how cohesive and brash SPEV members can seem when they’re bunched up together. To a certain extent, this impression Ecosoc members have of SPEV is accurate. SPEV is not a basic committee filled with people who exercise amiable restraint and makes nice with everyone just for the sake of being nice. SPEV is probably the most bonded committee and that level of familiarity brings with it a sense of assurance that can translate to a shared assertiveness. To put it bluntly, SPEV members can be loud and proud and look unabashedly cliquish. You’ve probably seen them huddled in the back parking lot during commeet hour, and if you’ve

seen them there, chances are you probably heard them snickering and whooping at something that sounds too suspiciously funny to be just about a clean, innocent joke. SPEV members—if they’re not wearing sober expressions cause they’re wracking their brains trying to throw the awesome events Ecosoc’s come to expect from them—always look like they’re just chilling and having fun. Furthermore, more than a few of its current and past members have admitted that poking fun at people—or bitching, as our post-Mean Girls generation would call it—is just one of the things which SPEV members do since the committee attracts a lot of strong personalities. Other Ecosoc members, upon seeing SPEV having a jolly old time, can probably take the hint that some of that fun is accomplished at the expense of another person. During days when they’re looking so comfortable with one another and perhaps your selfesteem’s taking a few hard punches, it can be pretty hard to share the same jovial spirit exuded by that rowdy bunch.

The kind of communal behavior and cliquish countenance SPEV members take on as described earlier could be alienating to the uninitiated, but these same qualities also indicate the best about the committee. There’s an impetus powering the conduct of SPEV members, and at the core of this behavior is their tight bond.

Current chairperson Ryna Claro puts it this way: “SPEV creates a feeling of belongingness [for its members] that makes people more comfortable with each other.” This type of environment fed by the committee obviously brought people together, and while they get cozier being lost in their own little world, this doesn’t automatically turn them into snobs who

exclude everyone else. It does make them hungry, however, not just for food, but also for competition and winning as a committee and producing excellent results grounded on great events. SPEV doesn’t win Grand Trad and orchestrate Treasure Hunts and Scavenger Hunts for nothing, competition is entrenched deep within the committee’s core, and as legendary former SPEV Vice Chair Andre Sarmiento puts it, “we don’t fuck it up.”

The fun that SPEV members have, whether it is through judging people or, shows for good measure how intact the committee is. That level of group familiarity and ease takes a while to be developed, and achieving that level of bond is in and of itself admirable. If it wasn’t already clear, having fun and feeding off each other’s energy is what drives SPEV members to excel and to compete. This culture of fostering fun is a proud SPEV tradition, now thriving under the reign of current chair Ryna as passed on by past SPEV chairs, including Miguel, Jason, and even the mythical Aaron Aw from years and decades back. Aaron Aw said that as far as the direction SPEV takes, it all depends on the leader’s own style, but for him, he wanted SPEV to be a fun place, because he believed that good output follows from it. This is what stuck to SPEV ever since, in that everything they do must be amusing in some way, and they bank on that with good results. So while they strut through Econ’s back parking lot, judge themselves and other people, and bond over keeping their full-figured, fiercely real shapes through intense eating, SPEV keeps that fiery fun flair and high-spirit. They remain unapologetic for what they do simply because they have fun doing it.

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FEATURES

Investment Tips From the Viper How to bed a woman the old fashioned way... with money

BY THE MONTY PYTHON

Note: This article is strictly for men (with money) only.

I

n a world of differences, there is only one thing that all humans can relate to - that is, love. Love makes our life more exciting and fulfilling, more complicated. It keeps the flame in our hearts burning, inducing us to be more passionate and inspired in things which we ought to do, and what the society demands us to do. This is the reason why many of us, men, are very agitated when it comes to girls.

Nobody can deny this fact that men seek to have a partner from whom they can get atleast an emotional support and more importantly, with whom they can share with the joy they have in their lives.

As a rational being, preferring to have more than having less, it is very vital that we use our money efficiently that our personal desires be fulfilled. Also, we, being good economists, should always remember that as we increase our investments, we are also increasing our production possibility frontier in the future. What I’m trying to say is this: we should put our money in women. Believe me, they are the best investments in life; better than stocks and businesses.

So here are some ways you may spend your money to attract the growth of your own GDP (General Discharge of Plasma):

1. Got to believe in magic.

I know you are not as good-looking as I am so you should consider this tip ‘cause you simply need to. In order to impress girls, a man should look clean and hot (this is based on personal experience so don’t worry, I know this). Most women like fair complexion, smooth face, and a hunk body like mine (hunkier than Yambao’s). They always say that they just need a loyal, trustworthy and gentleman guy but believe me, they also like physically attractive men. So with

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KEYS TO THE VIP Here is the Viper, happy and carefree

THE MASTER The Monty Python swears by Benjamin Franklin that his system works for any man, regardless of how ugly

9:15 Echoes family picture.

Flora still sober.

9:47 Derek catches lingering looks between Horace and Ralph. Enters into jealous rage.

this, you need to move. Do some facial care and go to the gym for some abs and triceps. This will make you a “yumyum-yum” awesome guy.

2. ‘Cause diamonds are girls’ best friend.

As my saying goes, if a man’s heart is through his stomach, then the way to a woman’s heart is through giving them material things. I’m not saying that all girls are materialistic. I’m just saying that many of them are! Anyway, giving gifts to a woman on a normal day will just make her happy and will think you are a sweet and generous guy. You can give her anything under the sun like food, books, flowers, alcogel, sanitary napkin, etc. But remember that what you give to her implies something. So the final test if you have already hooked her up, give her lingerie.

3. I’m a sugar daddy.

You really can’t save money when in the process of fishing your self-declared “soulmate”. So, in order to get her, you need to be some sort of a sugar daddy in a while. You need to pamper her. Bring her to movie houses, expensive restaurants, amusement parks and shopping malls with your brand new Celica. This will give the girl an impression that you can provide for her in the future. Of course, it is expensive. But don’t worry, that’s an investment.

4. The perfect man.

Women like well-rounded guys. They want a “perfect”

guy which we all know that there is no such thing. But if you come to think about it, we can pretend to be that ideal person. So, this is the plan, buy all of these stuff: lot of books (genius-type guy), musical instrument (preferably a saxophone since women like to sax), a dslr (women are vain people), a canvass (creativeness thingy), and a moleskine (poetic guy). If your women see all of these things, they will find you interesting and thus attractive in a sense.

5. The money.

This is the last thing you will do if all of the above does not work. Buy her! But this is not a manly idea so I personally discourage you. I don’t know if this will work though.

Just try it when you are already so much desperate.

I really don’t know if all of these things are helpful, I’m just assuming they are! But always remember that any investment is a risk so think first and pick the right girl.

Lastly, I just want to tell you this: that whenever you commit into a relationship, think that person as the one who will you marry! Don’t make the girls cry. We should love them.

If you want to talk about any problems or just want an advice, just tweet me at @_themonty. Get it from the expert!

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FEATURES

We’re Not So Different, You and I

BY SAMANTHA GONZALES

A

semester ago, an attack that united the hecklers of Ecosoc (the new graduates,) and the “basketball boys” (as former Memcom chairperson JR Yambao called them once) had awakened a society that had fresh wounds from its previous semester – an applicant bashed Echoes. He tweeted about his experience during commeet and how he had to face them with a fake smile and had to nod along to their exotic banter. This would’ve been fine by me. I was there in that very commeet, enthusiastically asking the apps about themselves (a courtesy I do not extend to most people) and actively trying to make them feel like they’re in the best place ever. In retrospect, his smile did seem a little fake but back then, I was just assuming he’d been embarrassed because his main interest was sleeping.

But the real problem was what had happened next. The seemingly drunken tweeting worthy of immortalizing in this issue (hashtag: #TweetableTweets) did not stop there. He had called us nice but weird, and when he realized the others might have the same opinion of us, after laughing at Horace’s name, he called the people of Echoes “rapists”. Youch. He must’ve seemed so kewl to his co-applicants. (Or, you know, whichever of you was the one replying to him.) This is what didn’t (and still doesn’t) sit well with me, and it was mostly what got people rage tweeting and rage talking and rage gossiping.

I remember GJ’s face when I told him what happened: he made a crying face jokingly but it had real traces of hurt and experience. I remember Mabel’s frustration and usage of multiple exclamation points and the caps lock, her patriotic defence of Ecosoc. I remember Andre’s and Cokieng’s intimidating replies and various rants. I remember Cocoy trying his best to tell everyone to stop. I remember JR Yambao telling the “basketball boys” to calm down as it was his obligation as an Execom member to be politically correct. But I also remember the applicant deferring the morning after news broke out. And I remember it never being talked about again. We had moved on and assumed him to be a young naïve boy with a rare case of word vomit. We had forgotten.

But wait a minute, why did we never talk about it again? Was it to show the world that Ecosoc forgives? Was it an act of kindness to the boy who seemed to be stuck in high school? Was it to not scare the other applicants? The reason is none of these, because the reason is something we never talk about but always manifests itself in the last page of this publication.

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Ecosocers talk But is everything we say wonderful?

We forgave him, because we are just like him.

Derek and Jomac call each other “fag” like it doesn’t mean anything. GJ makes horrible racist Mexican jokes and genuinely think they’re funny. PauBau calls black people “niggers” as if he is a white privileged man. Sol thinks a bunch of boys chanting “ga-ha-sa” is fucking hilarious. Romano thinks that sleeping around is acceptable if you’re an ugly girl. Pito thinks that Kris Aquino is a bad, bad, person for having children with different fathers. Even Spev chair Ryna Claro says that Echoes is weird.

Mark Matibag spreads gossip like wildfire. And we love it. A bunch of you think that that girl who wears heels to school everyday looks like a whore. What happened to our hurt faces and defence of the victims and rants about impoliteness and shaming of the stupid? We forgave it. And forgot about it.

We forgive him and every person like him because deep inside, we agree. We do secretly think that Echoes is weird, that Horace’s name is kind of funny and, most harrowing of all, we think it’s fine to call people rapists. We think it’s fine to call people faggots and niggers and whores and retards as long as the only people who hear the vulgar things we say are our friends.

As long as our thoughts are not made public, then fuck, it’s all good to call X a flat-chested, cock-sucking, spastic horsefucker.

As long as it’s not us who are talked about then go forth, and say whatever you want. As long as it isn’t about us, we don’t care about what people are becoming, how they’re growing up, not at all about anybody else. You know, whatever.

But trouble is, he did say everything in public. He did say all those atrocious things. He did make it clear that he thought he was better than everyone else. And we burned him at the stake by the same. Damn. Way. In the same damn way, we devour the attention of our peers and spit out words that make us seem so funny and clever at the expense of other people’s hardship and feelings and dignity.

This, my bigoted friends, doesn’t make us worse than he is, nor does it make him better than us. Like, at all. So when you compare your everyday story to the story above, what makes the two so different?

Absolutely nothing.

FEATURES “He who does not know how to look back at where he came from will never get to his destination.” – Jose Rizal.

T

Documentation And Delivery

his is one of our national hero’s most cited, retold quotes.

The reader must have encountered it at some point in their lives, in school or elsewhere. I personally have heard and read it a lot of times, to the point that it’s become stale; boring.

And its main idea happens to be history, arguably a boring subject in the eyes of many a student, thus its discussion in classes have seemingly been prime-time for sleep time.

In spite of whatever sentiment of disinterest a person may hold towards studying history, one nevertheless cannot discount its great importance in practically all walks of life. “Experience is the best teacher,” so we hear said. Thinking through it, what better way to learn how to approach situations when you know the actions of other people in similar circumstances and their consequences, good and bad? Some similarities may not appear obvious at first, but the first step in making the most out of the rich body of information that is the documented past is to be open to digesting it, no matter how bittering it may be to do so.

So what does that have to do with me?

I am part of the Fiesta Applicants batch, the latest to be inducted into the UP Economics Society, 64-members strong for its recently concluded 54th year. Being newbies, we have yet to truly etch carvings on the stone that is Ecosoc that drastically change its shape. All we see is the stone in its current form. We are at the very edge of the timeline of the organization, preceding nothing but a future that, though deemed bright, still remains uncertain.

Yet this stone alone cannot speak of the history itself of Ecosoc, only the product. Assuming some degree of cluelessness, there is no point of comparison for us Fiesta Apps to truly talk about it: the previous shapes it held, and how they all connected and were formed. Whatever picture us individual new members have of the organization, if laid to these circumstances, is grossly incomplete. We take what is given to us, without any extrapolation. It is only our personal experiences this past semester that we can truly vouch for as factual, as we weren’t there to witness any events that took place before it. Thus, any idea of the details beyond the surface we see can greatly change our perception of the organization we have just sworn ourselves to.

Given this lack of experience, there is no true way for any of us new members to have a totally complete picture of the organization. Come to think of it, there is no way for anyone

BY JUDE

to have an absolute view down to the most minute of details, with every batch of apps that come and has come, though a lot of those don’t really matter. Some of these events, on the other hand, cause waves instead of ripples, strong enough to disturb the sea of our community. These are the ones that involve and concern every stakeholder of the organization.

How then can the information gap be closed?

It may take a change in the way information is relayed to succeeding batches of applicants. The way things are now, new members are thrust right in the middle of the business of the organization and for some their only experience of getting the type of work Ecosoc does done is from their semesters as applicants. Based on my experience, there isn’t any form of documentation passed down to new teams and committees formed every semester from previous ones. Surely, there has never been any perfect committee that has been formed therefore there is always something to be learned from any of their missteps in the past, so as not to repeat them anymore. I believe there should be some way that these pieces of information are made aware and accessible for everyone, especially new members, may they be triumphs or troubles. There are an infinite number of ways to achieve objectives, and taking the journey with some extra preparation would then limit that number and lead to the formation of specific ideas. It is not a matter of spoon-feeding, but rather making the most efficient use of our human resources, not having to waste time on actions that should not even be put into consideration.

Beyond a structural change, however, the rest is all up to the execution and collective effort of everyone in the organization. I also believe that slowly, the pressure descends on my app batch to deliver.

Here I am, now hoping in that outcome, delivery, to pull through. Being an Ecosocer, to me, entails responsibility to fellow members and the organization as a whole, and now we Fiesta apps are under that umbrella. We are at the very edge of our organization’s timeline, and there will come that time when we will lead the way. It surely is a long way off. But, as every batch was, we are now in a position to work beyond words and idealistic values and deliver something outstanding to our new home. If we are able to inform ourselves better of what the organization has gone through, I’d think we’d have a more heightened sense of responsibility. It is my hope too that the unwavering commitment I saw in my co-applicants would not end at trying to become members. I would like to see us foster that commitment into a culture, and I see everything else following afterwards. And with these words, I hope not to be alone.

So here’s to moving forward, and forging a path we could look back to. There is a stone looking to be carved further.

“We are at the very edge of the timeline of the organization, preceding nothing but a future that, though deemed bright, still remains uncertain.”

NO Ecosoc’s not dead. Read the article!

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FEATURES

BLACKOUT Notes on the Cybercrime Bill

BY BEATRIZ BAYUDAN

FROM LEFT TO RIGHT The Women of Egypt, Neo-Nazi Obama, and the victory of the Arab Spring.

C

hristmas last year is the last Christmas that shall be celebrated amongst the different peoples of the world. It is the last celebration of giving gifts and presents by friends, families and strangers. The end as we know it will come at December 21, 2012, just short of 4 days before the Christmas of 2012. Why? The worldwide conspiracy of anti-Christians has already started if we will see what is happening around us.

The modernist Arabs have been replaced by fundamentalists and fanatics who will stop at nothing when they impose their rule on the countries that they govern. After gaining control, these new leaders will use the power of faith to persuade their countrymen in an uprising. An uprising, not only against the so-called imperial powers, but also against the Christians, who make up the majority of these imperial powers.

One reason why these anti-Christian movements are very confident is that the United States itself was founded not on Christian beliefs but rather on liberty and equality of peoples (despite their murder of millions of Native Americans). Obama himself is a part of the conspiracy for his ancestors were once victims of the Christians. This is because his ancestors were used as slaves in the plantations of the Christian king-

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doms, and thus he has a motive against the Christians because of the experiences of his ancestors.

The secret takeover has already begun in the executive position, and it will soon engulf the other branches of the United States government. After doing so, these conspirators will make sure the United States will use its influence to prevent a possible counterattack against their plot to destroy the nations whose religion is Christianity. The Arabs will be joined by the members of different minority groups and descendants of the pagans who the Christians wiped out.

Some of the new leaders of the world are members of the former minority groups; groups that were once oppressed by the ruling elite back in the colonial days. The ancestors of some of these leaders could not fight back against the oppression back then, so their families waited and waited for the ample opportunity to take revenge against the ones who conquered their ancestral lands in the name of God. After years of oppression by the Christians against their ancestors, who were pagans and infidels, these people vowed not only to wreck havoc in the world, but to show to the rest of the world that the Christians, in their most celebrated day of the year, will experience terror and nightmares in which the Christians, together with their families, will be butch-

FEATURES

THE END IS NEAR, MERRY CHRISTMAS

A conspiracy theory regarding the most wonderful time of year

BY MIKHAIL SINGSON

ered to death and their monuments will be blown to pieces.

Neo-Nazis and communists will also be a part of this conspiracy, for communists believe in equality in almost all forms of life and will not tolerate the almighty behavior of religious officials towards common people. Neo-Nazis meanwhile wanted revenge against what the Allies have done to the Nazis and their head officials (branding them as criminals and executing them). They do not care if individuals will die as long as they will gain power in the end.

Chaos is not the only thing that we need to watch for in the upcoming doom. We should watch out for increasing lack of morals that will be seen, because religion has now taken a step back in being the focal point of human life. It will have been replaced by the emphasis on discovery and survival.

The funds used to supply weapons were given by the descendants of the followers of the Knights Templar, who managed to retrieve some of their gold, again as a means of revenge against the Christian, particularly the Catholic, world for persecuting them.

Technology meanwhile came from the bright minds of the Illuminati, who still harbor enough hatred against the Church for persecuting their ancient members.

With all the pieces in place, a war against Christi-

anity would begin just before Christmas so as to make the Christians feel the loss and the betrayal that was given to their ancestors. The plan would be, after seeing the chaos that will happen in the United States, some powers, like North Korea, would gain immense confidence that they will join the war. In this war, the United States will be purposely weakened so that the alliance against Christianity will have an easier time conquering the other former Christian imperial governments. After the war is settled, the world will be divided by these different ideologies.

As in all kinds of conflict, when the dust is settled, then the true terror would begin, for these people were only united for one thing, the decimation of the former Christian empires. After this is all over, and because of their extreme ideologies, they will fight for the scraps that will remain and they will use nuclear weapons mercilessly against each other which, in turn, will doom the Earth. And Atlantis will rise up once more from the depths of Agarthi to ensure that we, the humans, will be eliminated from destroying the Earth, thus dooming us all. See Santa=Anagram for SATAN. Authorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Note: This is just a conspiracy theory; I cannot prove that this is either true or false. Also since this is just a theory, the people I mentioned might not be as evil as they are depicted here, but we should still watch out for the end.

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FEATURES

IN A WHOLE OTHER CLASS

BY JOSHUA SIAT

I

grab my phone from my pocket and check the time. It’s 3:55, and I’m nearly at Econ having walked from my last class. I arrive at the entrance and head to the tambayan, to spend a few minutes either to do committee work, to talk or to do other stuff before I head home. Once I enter, I place my bag on the floor amongst the colourful pile of bags strewn beside the lockers. Lots of Jans-

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ports, I observed. I sit down on the couch and play cards with the ones who were already playing there. While I play, I look around the tambayan, watching people whiz by, going in and out of the doorway.

I see someone hastily typing away on a laptop. It’s a Macbook. Another person enters wearing what seems to be a wornin pair of Vans. A guy passes beside me to sign-up for something on the bulletin

board wearing a Fred Perry polo shirt.

One of the guys I’m playing with goes out in order to buy J. Co Donuts from the neighboring org. One excitedly taps away, playing some game on an Ipad. Another person comes in wearing what looks like a batch shirt from her high school days.

By the execomm table, there’s a guy wearing a polo shirt with the little guy on a horse playing polo stitched on to the fab-

TITOS OF ECOSOC They watch you while wearing their designer sunglasses

ric. You already know what that one is, but what are all of these driving at?

Are we really defined by the things we wear? The things we patronize? The things we like to buy? Certain brands and certain labels connote specific ideas. Take note that brand here is defined as “a set of perceptions and images that represent a company, product or service”, as in the brands mentioned in the previous paragraph, and not the brand of Ecosoc itself.

When you think of Ralph Lauren, what comes to mind first? Affluent, attractive yuppies playing a few rounds of some sport reserved only to those in the upper echelons of society, maybe? We think like that because that is what their brand has established and represented itself to be. Just as boat shoes (admit it or not, it’s true) scream “conyo”, and slippers say “everyman”, what that person wears may not truly reflect his/her identity. But has this in anyway affected the dynamics and interaction within the confines of Ecosoc? Apparently, yes and no.

A MIXED BAG You look at Ecosocers and you would find an assortment of styles and interests.

You’d be hard-pressed to give one word that would represent the membership as

a whole. The fact that the membership is not strictly composed of Economics majors per se, but of many other courses in other colleges gives credence to the organization’s diversity, as cliché as that sounds. There are certain organizations within UP that exude a certain image based on what their members wear, buy, and patronize. Fortunately, Ecosoc has built enough of a good reputation that in the words of non-members I asked were, “hindi lang puro mayayaman ang dating at pa-party-party lang”.

Despite this though, we still aren’t safe from the age-old stereotypes that befall students from the School of Economics, much less, the College of Business Administration, and as most of Ecosoc’s members come from those two colleges, the organization also gets dragged into the mix. Yes, lots of us wear boat shoes.

Yes, lots of us have designer bags. Yes, lots of us have really nice, big and expensive DLSR cameras, but who doesn’t like nice things especially if you can afford them?

Group Dynamics But does the perception of “brand” extend to within the organization itself?

Does it even affect how we talk, work, make decisions and interact with our fellow members and our relationships with them? Well, like all societies and groups, we are prone to make judgments and observations of the members within that

group. When we see a certain label, in our heads come a pre-conceived idea or notion of what the person is like. That is the power of brand prestige. That is the kind of psychological influence that has made people millionares and billionares over the battle for the consumer’s cash.

This is why brands like Apple, Ralph Lauren and others have solidified their place atop their own respective markets.

When we do not know someone, we make snap judgments according to what they appear, what they wear, what they have. It’s normal, though it can create friction from time to time in member-tomember relations, but these snap judgments really just turn into no more than light-hearted jokes and quick quips.

Diversity is healthy in a group setting as it allows an exchange of interests and ideas, and is why the organization as a whole continues to function well, despite not everyone in this almost 250-member strong organization not getting along.

Brand prestige in the material sense is totally irrelevant to how the organization functions and carries out its work. ”Walang personalan, trabaho lang”, ika nga.

BRAND-LESS? We all want to look nice and have nice things. If you want to fulfill that through patronizing popular or established brands, go ahead, there is no problem with that. Just don’t flaunt it though, and everyone will get along. Most Ecosocers really don’t care whether you wear a Topman or a Bench shirt, designer shoes or rubber slippers, and that’s the beauty of Ecosoc. We can seem so alike while being so different at the same time. We don’t let those things get in the way of what we do for Ecosoc.

The allure of big brands will always remain, and there will always be many of us who want the prestige that comes with those brands. Jeff Bezos, founder of Amazon.com said that “A brand for a company is like a reputation for a person. You earn reputation by trying to do hard things well.” The comparison between brand and person ends there, for Ecosoc at least.

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FEATURES

TITO SOTTO IS A GENIUS

BY KENNETH REYES

O

ver the past few months, more and more Filipinos have become convinced that Sen. Vicente Castelo “Tito” Sotto III has lost his bananas on the job.

However, I am among the maybe 1% of the country’s population who disagree. In fact, I am among the estimated 0.000001% of the population who think Sotto is a genius. (This roughly corresponds to nine people. Excluding myself and Sotto, I don’t know who the other seven are.)

It is a peculiar position to take, I admit, but it makes more sense when placed in the proper narrative. This narrative began on October 27, 2008, halfway across the world, when Joaquin Phoenix announced that he was retiring from acting to pursue a hip hop career. Hollywood was shocked. Was he kidding? Apparently not, and over the next few months, Phoenix, now called “J.P.”, began recording rap demos, pursuing P. Diddy as producer, and sporting an unkempt caveman look, all of which was captured in I’m Still Here, a documentary shot and directed by his brother-in-law Casey Affleck.

While Phoenix is a widely respected actor, it becomes immediately apparent that he’s a terrible rapper—laughably terrible. He becomes a joke to the world, which, as the documentary depicts, wounds him deeply, and he suffers one breakdown after another. At one point, a deranged Phoenix cries that “J.P. is all of us.” Between crying and pray-

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THE DOCUMENTARY A social experiment of sorts by Phoenix

ing, he vents his frustrations out on the people around him, including musical partner Antony Langdon, who Phoenix mocks at length for never having accomplished anything in his life. Langdon, evidently pissed, takes his revenge by taking a shit on Phoenix’s face while he is asleep.

(There was nothing metaphorical in that sentence.)

Throughout the 100 minutes of the documentary, I was both horrified and mesmerized by the mental disintegration I was witnessing onscreen.

Or at least, I thought I was witnessing. Then the credits came: “Written

FEATURES

by Casey Affleck and Joaquin Phoenix.” That was the first clue. The second was more definitive: a week after the film was released in September 2010, Affleck revealed the whole thing to be a hoax—an elaborately staged bit of performance art that sought to explore the nature of celebrity in a medium that blurred reality.

Or something like that. Bottom-line is: it was a high-concept Borat.

Earlier that same year, Tito Sotto, recurring host of noontime show Eat Bulaga, was elected senator of the Philippines’ 15th Congress. These are the facts, and now I enter into speculation. I speculate that Sotto saw I’m Still Here, and, like flood from a broken levee, the banality of his entire acting career hit him in full epiphanic force. He felt the passionate desire to redeem himself, and Affleck’s mockumentary gave him the inspiration: Sotto was going to be satirist. Like J.P. the Self-centered Celebrity, or Borat the Vulgar Kazakh, or Spinal Tap the Über Metal Band, he will play a character that epitomizes the ultimate Filipino politician: religious, arrogant, and stupid. And since there are no directors alive in this country who are “good” in any sense of the word, this “film” will have to transcend celluloid to become real life itself. Thus, Sotto will play the role of Archetypal Filipino Politician 24/7. It’s a dreadful character to play, but great artists know they must sacrifice for their art.

fully cultivating an image of clueless bigotry. As homage to Phoenix, he even grows a beard. It’s successful: indignant Facebook pseudo-intellectuals direct some of their hate at him.

However, Sotto soon realizes that when it comes to the RH Bill, no one can ever top the expert bigotry of the CBCP and its official publication, the Varsitarian. If Sotto wants to stoke public anger, he will have to venture into another equally shallow issue.

By 2012, he’s found it, and his genius starts to manifest. On August 13, he delivers a speech in the senate, flamboyantly lifting large swaths of text from blogs without citation. (He even adds a hilarious bit in his delivery where he succumbs to emotion and breaks down crying—though of course, no one got the joke.) Sure enough, it didn’t take long for netizens to expose this utterly heinous act of copying something without citing the sources. Oh the humanity.

As rehearsed, Sotto’s chief-of-staff spat out the Sotto Satire Team’s prepared statements: that blogs are in the public domain, that the blogger should be honored to be plagiarized by a senator. These were designed to be too stupid to be taken seriously, and as such, they were promptly taken seriously. It’s a proven fact that the Facebook pseudo-intellectual pounces at every opportunity to comment on something so easy, so morally simple. Even Miguel Syjuco, that mediocre novelist, got himself trending with an incoherent RapFor this satire to truly make its pler piece entitled “Why Tito Sotto’s mark, Sotto will have to appear thor- plagiarism matters.” oughly convincing. And so, throughout 2011, he builds on his pro-life So far, so satirical. reputation and begins radicalizing his stance against the RH Bill, careUnfortunately, the plan inadvert-

ently whetted the mindless malignance of the Facebook mob, so that when an Atenean named Robert Carabuena was caught on tape mauling an MMDA officer, the spiteful frenzy was torrential. He is evil, fat, rich, and he deserves death, death I say! Paula “Amalayer” Salvosa followed months later.

Sotto was devastated. Sure, the Facebook mob was still making a fool of itself, but now it was at the expense of the defenseless, like Christopher Lao some years before. It’s only okay when the pseudo-intellectuals took out their haphazard wrath at him, for he at least is a powerful senator—he can take it like only a dark knight can. So to draw the attention away from the Roberts and the Paulas, he decides to bring his satire up a notch—all the way to eleven.

In all honesty, he never thought the whole Kennedy thing would work. It just seemed too idiotic to be worth anyone’s time. He even feared that people would catch on to the joke.

Nevertheless, he kept his faith in the inanity of the Facebook mob, and it paid off: the reactions that followed his plagiarism-by-translation stunt were utterly surreal. And comical.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the only rational explanation for Tito Sotto’s actions. Do you really think he’s that astoundingly obtuse, feckless, opaque, pompous, and wretched? No: this man—this great man— has placed his reputation on the line in order to orchestrate the greatest piece of satire the Philippines has ever seen. Friends, hearken! We may think we are ridiculing Tito Sotto, but we are only ridiculing ourselves.

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FEATURES

HEY, FIFTYPERCENT SALE OFF AT NATIONAL BOOKSTORE

BY DEREK PARREÑAS

“After mass, we go back home and eat Noche Buena. I miss Christmas food! And the gifts!”

“What about Jesus?”

–some people, overheard, somewhere

I

t’s Christmas. Jesus was apparently born during this time of year, approximately two thousand years ago, withholding any similarities to ancient pagan traditions rampant in Northern Europe back in the Dark Ages. Jesus was the son of God and both God and Man (depending if you believe, like the Catholic majority in the Philippines, in the dogma of the Holy Trinity). Jesus collected twelve followers and performed acts of wonder for those that listened to Him. Jesus was crucified, died, and was buried: On the third day, He rose again and ascended into Heaven to open the gates to us sinners. And that, my friends was the story of Jesus. He founded Christianity too, a well-known belief system based on the Jewish God, that would find its way to the Philippines and grip its people, the lone Christian-majority state in Asia. Side note: This article wasn’t written to be offensive in any way.

It’s Christmas. The U.P. Economics Society tambayan has a Christmas tree (albeit a very austere looking one). The members are waiting on the 25th to receive majority of their gifts. Some already have begun giving gifts, especially since they may not see each other during the Christmas break that the secular institution, the University of the Philippines, allows its students to have. Some members are dreaming of clothes marked with that silhouette of a man riding a horse, that outline of the Antarctic avian species, or (for lack of any damn subtlety, if you’re missing the point) those expensive ZARA clothes. Food too. Ham, brownies, spaghetti, cake, queso de bola, candy canes, roasted suckling pig (Kenneth says to embrace our elitism), Jamba Juice, Kenny Rogers’s Roasters’ Chicken, J. Co Doughnuts, McDonald’s, all the damned food brands you can muster. Hey, let’s add Absolut Vodka and San Miguel Pale Pilsen too! Celebrations

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and consumerist inclinations, all for Jesus and His Christian nation! Seriously, even though it reads funny on paper, there’s nothing wrong with it. Celebrating the coming of your Savior, I mean. (Its kinda weird that that non-Christian people celebrate Christmas too though, but you know what they say! If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em!)

DAS BIBLE AND THE CHRISTIAN MANIFESTO Well, if your Savior wanted you to give up all your material possessions and share them with your neighbors (imagine Mik watering the garden in front of your house and Telle living beside you), just like those old-school commies, would you do it? Really now? Well he did espouse some form of primitive communism back in the day, y’know, 33 A.D. Jesus wanted common ownership of all material wealth, since everyone was bound to die anyway and the true kingdom is found in Heaven.

I guess He knew how hard it would be to stop drinking Coke if you had a particular fondness for Coke or how unpleasant it would’ve been if everyone had to ride a jeep to go to where they wanted. Think about it… Ecosoc without all the merchandise and fund-raisers. Doesn’t sound like Ecosoc, now does it? Or without the multitude of cars that get us to places, especially since Scavenger Hunt depends on these privately owned motorized vehicles to get us from point A to point B. And now, Christmas. Without the gifts and food and the drunken revelry in your own private homes, away from the machinations of public life and publicly owned what-nots and what-have-yous. Doesn’t sound like Christmas, doesn’t it?

Sometimes, you have to wonder if Jesus ever thought that some

FEATURES fat guy in a red suit that he’s never met would become the mascot for his birthday. That it would become a number one excuse to “get drunk as ****”. And most especially, that it would become a great and regular capitalist venture to make tons of money off of people, all in the sake of charity. Especially since, well, put plainly, Jesus wanted everyone to share everything they owned. Money included.

Maybe money wouldn’t even be an issue in this utopian society of His.

built on the internet and Facebook and Twitter, American computers, European luxury clothing, and Japanese-built infrastructure through Build-OperateTransfer agreements. Yet more than that, we stand on failed ideas of Communism, which may or may not resurge one day.

And right now, you have to thank God (or whoever deity or lack thereof, you believe

in. It may be yourself.) for private ownership and capitalist systems. They make you feel more blessed than those that don’t have what you have.

Sounds cruel, but hey, it’s true.

There must be some truth to that idea that “if Jesus lived amongst us today, he would be branded as a terrorist”, because Jesus might be denying all the sexy billboards of Anne Curtis and, as the Arabs put it so poetically, “western Capitalistmaterialist poison” that’s so pervasive in today’s globalizing modern world. Well, he was also quite the terrorist back in the good ‘ole days, a.k.a. during the Roman Occupation of Israel, espousing radical ideas of one God, loving one’s neighbor, and turning the other cheek towards naydo-gooders. And to add to all of that, no material belongings! Sounds like Jesus was quite the Che Guevara of His time.

Or is it that Che was quite the Jesus Christ of His time? Well, Jesus never took up arms, okay. He might be in a league of His own. God and Man combined, right?

These days, there’s nothing like that anymore.

THE FACEBOOK GENERATION AND CYBER-GIFS As you can see, we’re not living in 33 A.D. anymore, and now all those “radical” ideas of Jesus Christ are commonplace. Christianity is the biggest beliefsystem in the world today. Also, we’re not living in the 60’s anymore, when anyone you looked at in UP was probably a communist, and the anti-communist (but not necessarily pro-democracy) Marcos Regime, together with his New Society, fell down (along with the Berlin Wall) over twenty years ago. Communism is as dead as spandex. China turned into some sort of capitalist-socialist chimera, North Korea’s a monarchy, and Cuba is the only hope for the Marxists. We live in a postpost-modernist Manila-and-world hybrid

JOSEPH CHRIST If Joseph Stalin read the Bible, he would look something like this.

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FEATURES

HARDBALLIN’ EP. 3

LAKERS...

WHO?

BY THE CRUZ MACHINE & EROL “THE QUINTESSENTIAL ELMO” MIRANDA

Quotations Corner “The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.”

-The Prodigy “Kobe>Lebron”

-The Anon

“All hype, no depth” -GaSol “Lakers miss Luke Walton” -Lou “A team that hasn’t reached its full potential. Scary, when it does.

But still no match for the scorching Heat.”

-L’Enzo

C

oming into the 2012-2013 season, the basketball world is still dominated by scenes of the Heat’s championship run, partly because of the hype and the charisma surrounding the team. With LeBron, D-Wade, and the Boshtrich leading the pack, it is simply a team bound for greatness. Furthermore, the 2012 Olympics also gave spice to what could have been a boring offseason. However, intriguing offseason events stole the scene and sent shockwaves in the NBA. Dwight Howard, who has been, well, the best big man of the last 3 years (to those saying Andrew Bynum is the best big man in the NBA, please stop with your madness), has decided to take his talents to Tinseltown. Teaming up with five-time champion Kobe Bryant and the greatest soft power forward ever in Pau Gasol, it seems destined, at paper at least, that this squad will be on course to win the championship. Not only that, before getting Superman, they landed one of the best point guards (to never win a championship) in Steve Nash. With Steve and The Black Mamba running the backcourt, and Softie all star and

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Superman in the paint, the Lakers pose a legitimate threat to the championship…

What then, is the point of this article?

The thing is, the Lakers, with enormous talent at their disposal, is right now, a sub .500 team. Oh well, to give justification, a .500 team. And at the very least, getting a former Coach of the Year packing home in Mike Brown.

What seems to be the problem here?

Agree or disagree with us, one of the main problems the team has to address is their chemistry. As with any other team who just incorporated into the system some new players, adjustments should be made to ensure that everyone knows their role. In the case of the Lakers, we can say that too much stardom in the team can have adverse results, as evident so far.

Secondly, the Lakers have a weak bench, compared to those of San Antonio, Miami, and Oklahoma City. We can’t expect the starters to play the full 48 minutes, so the bench seems to be a liability against the elite teams in the league. Jodie Meeks

FEATURES and Antawn Jamison don’t stand a chance against Ray Allen, Rashard Lewis, and we all know San Antonio’s bench almost beat Miami’s core earlier this season.

Third and more importantly, is their offensive setting. Mike D’ Antoni thrives on the run-and-gun kind of offense that propelled the Suns to consecutive appearances in the Western Conference Finals.

The problem is, however, is that the Lakers cannot expect a 34 year old Kobe Bryant and a 38 year old Steve Nash to run the court all the time. And we all know Dwight and Pau are not as fast as Amare and Boris Diaw during the Phoneix days. The LA Point guards, Steve Nash and Steve Blake, cannot guard their own shadows.

So what seems to be the solution to these struggles by the Lake Show?

Well, to be honest, the answer lies in one thing: time. The Lakers have an immense load of talent, that is given, but the thing they have to focus on is how to mingle with each other on the court. Oh sure, Kobe can still isolate and shoot that deadly mid-range fade-away above everybody else, but he has to take into account that Dwight is another superstar that needs his share of the load.

To be fair with the Lakers, we can look back in recent history (2010) and see that the Heat had the same scenario with LAL. Coming in 17 games to the season, the Heat were struggling to become an elite team in terms of the win-loss column (9-8, to be precise). However, a wake-up game against LeBron’s former team in Cleveland gave them some much needed momentum and they proceeded on to become the season’s runner up.

Maybe that is the one thing the Lakers need. A wake-up game, or who knows, a 50-point showing by the greatest active shooting guard in the league right now.

There is no shortcut to greatness. The Lakers have to realize that like all the champion teams did. They just have to be willing to go through the process of constant improvement. Kobe and the rest of their all stars must also be willing to sacrifice if they wish to reach the mountain top. Everybody wishes to call himself a champion, only a few are willing to earn the title.

THE LAKERS Well, they wanna be just like ‘em

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FEATURES

CHRISTMAS SEEMS A LOT COLDER UP NORTH NICE: (NAUGHTY OR NICE)

BY HORACE CIMAFRANCA

E

erie silence shrouded the once proud halls of the Council of Elves.

In a landmark ruling, the council unanimously raised the age limit for Registration* to 21 years old. Only on one previous occasion had the age limit been raised, in 1134, from 8 to 12 years. There were no jeers nor cheers, just the sound of Chancellor Elfechus’ cracking approval echoing through a markedly less ornate chamber. In this rare occasion when all factions of elfdom politics stand by a common decision, the irony was marked with an air of common bitterness. The emotional weight of having such a measure approved, discarding centuries-old tradition, took its toll on the Council’s members especially on the conservatives who stood up and walked out in hollow defiance. This ruling, although a tough pill to swallow, was a necessity amidst a failing North Pole economy. While out on the streets, despondence played well its tunes. Shops were closed early, subways were empty and churches were filled with the faithful. Santa Claus took all his gravitas on national television later that night. Once a beacon of hope and stability for many North Poles, he did more to apologize for the measure than to justify it. On the final breadth of his speech, he let out a grim outlook for, and even all pundits agree, no more sugarcoating can ever hide the worst abjection in North Pole’s history.

The raising of the age limit was intended to expand the market for Santa’s gifts.

In the North Pole’s traditional markets the crisis-hit Eurozone and North America - recipients, and therefore the demand for Santa’s gifts, hit an all-time low. In the United Kingdom alone, recipients fell to just over 3 million, the lowest in 35 years despite the almost two-fold increase in

40

Mik Singson the eligible population during the same timeframe. This trend, according to North Pole economists, is mainly attributed to one social movement: secularism. While Santa has long been relegated to being a secular icon for the Holidays, empirical studies suggest that secularism actually leads to a lower belief in the real Santa Claus. When a society is less religious, there is a lower fraction of children who believe in Santa. The opposite is true in relatively more religious countries where belief in Santa’s existence is high. Unfortunately for the North Pole, secularism has since made inroads during the last century in its traditional markets, whose share of gift receipts make up almost 60%.

“With a genuine passion for history, Mikhail’s fascination with the novelties of old provides enough of a distraction from the faults accustomed to other worldly endeavors...The observers sent to Manila also noted that Mikhail owns and drives a compact vehicle. This surprised the Deliberations Committee since Mikhail is one of only a few adult individuals in the Philippines who were given the special Forever a Child classification(FAC), a distinction given to an individual for his unwavering childlike temperament. A keen observer also pointed out that his car seats had Zebra fur as covers.

This could’ve cost him his eligibility. Animal cruelty, or the tolerance thereof, merits an automatic disqualification. Further obserReading all that, you must be thinking, vation led to the conclusion that the covers why should it concern you? This writer were made out of synthetic fur from a facobtained the final official list of eligible tory registered in Dongguan, China.” recipients for 2012 from the Ministry of Registry. As with any North Pole list, the recipients were classified as either Naughty or Nice, with those under Nice guaranteed to receive a gift from Santa while those under Naughty will have their eligibility reviewed until next year.

With the age of eligibility extended to 21, this year marks the first time Ecosocers are included in the list. These records Jess Biscocho show there are only nine eligible overall out of more than 200 Ecosocers aged 21 “The committee is delighted to have a forand below. The reason for the low level mer full-age recipient (consistent recipient of eligibility is, according to a senior ana- from birth until the age limit) be up for elilyst of the Registry, a historically low rate gibility. Observers pursued only a minimal of belief among Filipinos aged between degree of tracking which lasted only thirty 12 and 21, a demographic stratum which minutes. They were quick to confirm that covers almost all Ecosocers.

Jessica is Nice. However, the Deliberations Committee found Jessica’s thoughts and acThe following are snippets from the ac- tions too mature for her to be included in the companying report, which recounts com- elite group.” ments and observations made by elf observers and the Deliberations Committee.

FEATURES

y z Jomac Conty “Along with Mikhail, José belongs to the elite FAC group. It is rare for two individuals belonging to a common organization (whose demographic variety is very low) to belong concurrently to the elite group. Among those classified as Nice, the observers suggested that José is the most outgoing. It is imperative to note that on one occasion, the observers decided to break with protocol to save José from a Mossad operation. Upon interrogation, the two Israeli agents nabbed by the observers admitted that José was the target of a kill operation for José simply knew too much about the Mossad. The North Pole has since filed a diplomatic protest against Israel, citing the Helsinki Protocol.**”

y

t Miguel Andres “Mr. Andres returns to the list of eligibility for the first time in eight years. Observers have noted that Miguel had not only vastly improved his skills in music and cookery, but has also used these talents for the advancement of causes deemed ‘honorable’ by the Deliberations Committee.”

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FEATURES

NAUGHTY: Carmel Baquilod

u

“The observers recommended the exclusion of Carmel from the Nice list because she simply thought ‘too highly of herself.’

It was noted that Carmel excessively interjects exclamations of self-praise during casual speaking engagements. She has also indulged herself in self-flattering conversations with other selfflattering friends, all of whom did not make it to this year’s expanded eligibility list. For further reference, these friends are Mabel Cortez, Cocoy Vargas and Bryan Cuerdo. The committee was surprised to find Mr. Cuerdo’s name and until further notice, he remains identified as one of Carmel’s self-flattering friends.

Angelica de Guzman

u

“The observers were appalled by the course of actions Angelica consistently took to manage her day to day business. On one occasion, it was observed that the subject was entertaining impure thoughts while watching a cat lick its underbelly. Furthermore, Angelica’s taste in clothing and choice of parlance urged the observers to recommend her immediate removal from eligibility. As an addendum, the Deliberations Committee was also informed that from birth to 12 years old, Angelica had only been deemed Nice twice - on her birth year and the year after.”

q Maurice Tong “From a full-age recipient, the observers regret to inform the Deliberations Committee that Maurice has turned into a Naughty adult. The observers were particularly dismayed by his worldly intention behind joining a choir, for his end goal was to have his singing prowess overpower the rest of his peers.

It was also noted that Maurice has regularly expressed condescending remarks against persons of ‘lower stature’, particularly referring to classes of humans physically closest to elves, both in public and private situations.”

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FEATURES

Matthew Mercado

y

“Matthew did not initially appear on the list of eligibles submitted to the observers. However, in a case similar to Mr. Caronoñgan’s, the Office of Santa Claus requested that he be included for observation on the following grounds: first, that he is being considered for the Conclave and second, the Office commends his brave choice of colorful fashion which his Eminence would like to emulate. Since the observers have yet to make their recommendations, Mr. Mercado will remain tagged as Naughty.”

q Marte Caronoñgan “Marte was considered Nice until his truck ran over one of the observers who was disguised as a pebble. However, he is still subject to further deliberations as requested by the Office of Santa Claus. It was indicated in the request that Mr. Caronoñgan ‘by virtue of his physique, may one day be eligible to join the Conclave of Sub Santas…that would have given Marte a leverage over other recipients since it is probable that he may potentially become Santa Claus himself in the medium term.’ “

*Registration is the process that determines a person’s Eligibility or inclusion in the final list of Santa’s gift recipients.

Eligibility doesn’t guarantee a gift since an eligible individual will have to be assessed and classified Nice. **Israel is a signatory of the Helsinki Protocol, which recognizes the immunity of individuals under the ‘Forever a Child’ classification from covert and non-covert state-sponsored operations.

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FEATURES

IF PLAGIARISM WERE LEGAL

BY VITO CASTAÑEDA

T

he Kola Super-Deep Borehole1 was the result of a Soviet project that attempted to drill as far into the earth’s crust as possible. To this very day, the abandoned shaft still holds the world record for the deepest hole ever drilled by the human race (keep the ‘yo mama’ jokes to a minimum, please). This thing goes down over for over twelve freaking kilometers. After reaching that depth, the team couldn’t go any lower because the extreme temperatures would basically have melted their equipment if they had kept going.

Is this the farthest down us humans will ever go? Have we reached the limits of our technological ability to penetrate deep and hard into Mother Earth? (okay, that’s the last one, I promise.) Hmm...

I’d like to think not. There’s one more thing we could try. First, take a certain senator, drop him into the very bottom of the shaft, and ask him to justify his acts of plagiarism. All you have to do now is sit back and watch as every nonsensical word that comes out of his mouth magically digs himself deeper and deeper into the ground until he hits rock bottom.

Literally. With any luck, he’ll somehow manage to sink even lower than that before disintegrating in the hot molten core. By then we would have rid ourselves of a man who showed the public that plagiarism isn’t just for us students.

This man not only repeatedly denied the repeated accusations against him, but went so far as to say that “copying is the sincerest form of flattery2.” At one point, he even claimed that his political status

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granted him immunity from plagiarism charges.

Wait, is that even possible? Legal Immunity from plagiarism? How would that work exactly? Imagine that, a world where high-ranking officials can simply steal credit for ideas and works without facing the consequences? Come to think of it, a lot of them are already doing that... it’s just that they’re still “technically” breaking the law. Plagiarism is a means that no end should ever justify, and society will obviously suffer when even the smallest exceptions are made.

Remember, plagiarism is a form of theft. When you copy even one phrase from another work without citing your source, you are stealing credit from the original author. Don’t try that “oh, but it’s in the public domain” excuse either. Guys like Plato are too dead to actually sue me if I went around pretending to establish Western philosophy, but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m a lying prick. If you want to imagine how things would look if plagiarism were suddenly legal, just think about how life would be if theft in general were no longer a “crime.”

Basically, no one would “pay” for things anymore. Why would you fork over your cash for basic needs when you can just walk into a store and pick it right off the shelf? Now that your grocery bills are gone forever, why stop there? Just take any damn think you want! Video games, magazines, appliances, cars... the sky’s the limit. As long as you put in the effort to jack the goods, you’ll pretty much have everything you want in life. That is... as

long as there are people still willing to produce those things. You don’t have to be an economics student to know that shit costs resources, and no one that isn’t Jesus is willing to do anything absolutely free.

Why would the bakers, factory workers, and store owners just let people take their stuff without compensation? Who cares if theft is legal; the phrase “a man’s gotta eat” cuts both ways. Naturally, even the most retarded firms would see that there’s zero profit in business these days, so everyone just stops manufacturing altogether.

Plagiarism is the stealing of thoughts.

People strive to come up with original ideas so that they have something meaningful to contribute to the world. Even though much of our lives is supported by the ideas of those who came before us, our individual “self-worth” is largely based on the things we can do by ourselves. When one plagiarizes, he boosts his own “selfworth” at the expense of others. Given enough time and plagiarists, and people just won’t see the value in doing anything original when everyone else will just steal from them. This could lead to a cycle where people almost never come up with their own stuff anymore; they just borrow and take from whatever source they can.

Eventually, thinking itself grinds to a halt.

Only now do I realize how similar “plagiarism” and “plague” sound. Every act of plagiarism like a virus that weakens the civilized system we took so long to put together. If you want a disease with the power to kill real human thought, that would be a good place to start.

1 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kola_Superdeep_Borehole 2 http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/306588/sotto-how-will-iapologize-for-plagiarism-when-i-never-plagiarised

CULTURE Sponsored by Del Monte Philippines

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s right Judith, I put that banana.

As for everyone else, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a commentary on Ecosoc culture.

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CULTURE

THINGS I DIDN’T NEED TO KNOW Sam Gonzales

Too often, I find myself not wanting to know things about people. Friendship does have a downside: TMI. So, as a person who likes ruining your day, I’ve decided to collect information about people that you did not want to know about them. This article is inspired by a random lunch with random people including Pito.

Did you know that...

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Horace eats his own skin

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Mark (Matibag) doesn’t use deodorant

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GJ doesn’t digest chocolate well

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Pito might have worms (as in bulate)

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Once, Sam’s retainer fell into the toilet bowl and she had to re-use it (after boiling, of course)

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Yasmin shares socks with people, washed or unwashed, we’ll never know

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Jed has (had?) crushes on his cousins

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Mark (Manguera) shat his pants in the fourth grade and had to admit it to his bus mates because they were already on the verge of smelling each others’ asses. He cried to his yaya when he got home.

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When Ryna was climbing a mountain, she sat on a rock. And when she stood up, may tagos... and then a bunch of guys saw everything (the event of)

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Geoff will give his future empire to a person who will wash his moldy ass when he grows old / His only purpose for having kids is so that someone will wash his moldy ass when he grows old

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•

May almoranas si Jason (this entry needs to be in Filipino, okay)

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Noreen’s boobs have different lengths

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Gab’s friends saw his ass in HK; also he sleeps with no underwear

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Corollary: same friends saw Enzo’s blurred silhouette taking a shit

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On 8 Nov 2012, Carmel woke up with wet pajamas (she is 17 yo)

ON SECOND THOUGHT Mark might not really look like how he did in the News section. They look contipated.

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Mabel had to use receipts to wipe her ass because there wasn’t any toilet paper left

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Mads’s email is: mads_girlpower@yahoo.com

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Topy is a virgin (why is this included here?!)

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One time, Anon was eating corn, he saw his two front teeth stuck on the cob

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When JR shat his pants in the 1st grade, he had the janitress wash his ass

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One time, all of Andres’ underwear got soaked in water so he used the same brief... for three days

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Lerizze’s head once got squished by the elevator doors in a hotel.

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Marte doesn’t clean his ears for months. And when he does, he gets so fascinated by the shards of earwax that he collects them and keeps them somewhere on his table.

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Kenneth’s parent made a sex tape. He saw the tape. The end.

“We did not need to know that.”

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CULTURE

Thoughts from Places: Cultural Center of The Philippines Livin’ La Vida Imelda

BY JUDITH PASCUAL

U

pon Entering the Silangan Hall at the Main Building, I was astounded by the abundance of old people - particularly people who were better dressed than all of us. There we were, lugging school bags and wearing old Chuck Taylor’s, while everyone else was clad in semi-formal wear. We were out of place, but we did not care.

The lights dimmed. This short bald guy appeared, he had a clear book on one hand and a white hanky on the other.

Actors made their way to the pseudo stage to dance and to sing. The show was entertaining, enlightening even. It was held together by the notion of gossip, and what a powerful currency it is: how it can ruin people and drop a nation to its knees.

It played an important role in the building of the Philippines and how it projected itself to the world. It was suggesting enough to say that the whole Cultural Center of the Philippines was nothing a vainglorious attempt at showing “Filipino Culture”. That notion made me realize how much we, as a culture, value what other people think of us. Don’t we all have moments when we paint lawns green and attach paper flowers on walls to make us feel pretty enough for others?

As the show ended, the actors and even Mr. Celdran himself mingled with the audience. The feeling of being out of place surfaced again for everyone in the audience sort of knew each other. Maybe we weren’t so out of place - we saw no less than Ms. Toby Melissa Monsod herself, and only a handful of us had the audacity to greet her. We were a foot away from

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Mr. Celdran when Sol, being the most socially adept out of all of us, asked him to have a picture with us. We were not able to bring high powered cameras, lest a modest digicam. All we had were smart phones and I lugged along a 35mm film cam, so we did what any normal group of college students will do: we had a mirror shot with Mr. Carlos Celdran. It’s as embarrassing as it gets, yet we still did it.

We are young.

Exiting the hall, we were high with ideals and drunk with our youth.

Venturing into the darkness of the CCP at night, we took the non-working escalator down to the exit. Hearing the gongs and drums of the Ramahari, we couldn’t help but wander off into the dark, sneakily passing through the unlocked gates of

main theater and peeking through the hinged doors. We saw the silhouette of the Ramahari, shadows dancing in the redness of the light. I wanted to see more, so I tiptoed to get inside. I thought I was doing a good job at my espionage until I realized that my cover was completely exposed all along - I was standing next to the sound booth and the men in black were staring at this frantic kid. I mumbled a hurried sorry and scurried out of the theater entrance, followed by my fellow adventurers who will not be named.

Those few moments of excitement were the highlight of my night, really. I felt my youth running through my veins and as I ran through the corridors out to the real world, I am proud to say that I am a teenager - wanting to experience all kinds.

CARLOS CELDRAN Legitimizing the mirror shot since ‘12

CULTURE

Tweetable Tweets: Segmented Edition by @famamfa @gelclemente When’s the oblation run? I’m scared…. @mmmatibag Baho mo @PauloTayawa sana sa replay, maiwasan ni manny yung counter. #maibanaman @PauloTayawa “All those memories will be lost in time like tears in rain.” @PauloTayawa yung dahilan para maligo ka ay dahil iinom ka sa labas...pwede ding hindi #sembreak @PB_andGeli UGH ang gwapo mo leche ka ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh @jussipgirl I don’t like spending in school so I eat my tinga!! @nikkibondzz Guys di ako yun...hindi ako umutot

@OreoMcfLERI starting to realize how annoying mistral is HAHA @onionuevo nilalanggam kama ko... sweet ko talaga @mynameistimothy Gay prof cancels class this Friday to celebrate his being a fan of Sarah Geronimo. Seriously... @ GLOVApalooza @botanbelen @GaldePugante Bakit kaya nakakautot ang kamote? @botanbelen I don’t know why people were giving me really weird looks when I went to Lay Bare to schedule an appointment... @ArisHilton31 Kung basa-basa at umuutut-utot na. #MalalaNaYan

Okay, next month nalang We’ve taken the liberty to create usernames for our members!

by Horace Cimafranca, Angelica De Guzman, Pito Morales and Marte Caronogan

Derek Parrenas: @oneDEREKsyon Irene Arzadon: @Irena_claro Mads Salazar: @MadsTongco Ryna Claro: @Ryna_Lamarca Ryan Malit: @martetekoMALIT Miko Gloria: @mikobryo Geoff Bautista: @GEOFFran Dhiren Karnani: @hinDHIREN Tong: @u_TONG Nikki Kalagayan: @mabutingKALAGAYAN Bing Perez: BingBangTheory BONUS SECTION: @magicmik’s corner Carmel Baquilod: @caramen or @Josh_Baquilod Ralph Dantes: @dingdong_ DANTES Louie Wee: @weeweelu Pauline Torre: @toremypa (ano?!)

Justin Baniqued: @banig_ni_ justin Anj Chua: @chuain_chuaout Bing Perez: @PerezidentBing

Miguel Andres: @andres_me Darrell Magsambol: @darrell_slim_shady Ayla Reyes: @reyesbarbeque_official Cathy Bucay: @habangmayBUCAY Kelvin Tagnipez: @tagpinezkomaliit Mark Matibag: @mark_myTEABAG Shelly Umali: @PB_Shelly or @shelly_ba_belly Mik Singson: @magicmik

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CULTURE

Gossip G. Well, if you looked here first, shame on you! But gossip is pretty addicting.

H

ello dah-lings, did you miss your mama?

Well, I didn’t miss you so quit the drama.

Anyway, I’ve been dilly-dallying around lately in the hope that my unproductivity will bear me skittles of gossip!

But it didn’t. Good thing I can rely on my Chichi gurls. If you don’t like the Chichi, blame the Chichi gurls.

Mr. Handsome found himself too handsome for anything. Why? He thought admiring his flawless kisser will make one good piece of nostalgia. Not that it’s a big issue but his insistence is giving the yearbook people a migraine. So far, no compromise has been reached. And while the rest of Mr. Handsome’s batchmates are breaking their eardrums looking for the perfect song lyrics, here he is proclaiming the world’s attraction to his beauty. If Mr. Handsome gets his way, we will be seeing a revolution against song lyrics restrictions and heads will be rolling! That’s not a good cure for migraine, I guess. Undergrads, ask your most beloved Senior.

As usual, something Gossip G-worthy traces its roots to the back parking smoking area. Looks like a former back parking staple, Ms. Pretty Shortpants, disowned her friends! The reason remains unclear but my Chichi gurls think it’s probably something too petty for college and too cool for high school. If you don’t get that, that’s okay. As if we all care. Noticeably, Pretty Shortpants’ presence has not been felt in her favorite hangout place. But her now former friends are still close to each other as ever! Whatever the reason is for Pretty Shortpants’ unfriending spree...as if we all care.

My gay hairdresser (there is no crime for redundacy, just saying.) once told me that the way to a man’s pants is a great hairdo. Although I think 99% of that is Minerva

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pebbles (read: SHIT) and just a ploy to keep his customers coming back, our Little Perky Girl just proved that there might be some truth to it. LPG’s hairdo caught Pablo’s watchful eye. And why wouldn’t that happen? Pablo’s always around. Ever since, Pablo has been greeting LPG with so much glee. He even stroke her hair once. How romantic. *Record scratch* What’s wrong with that? Well, Pablo is not LPG’s type. Do you now regret the do, LPG? [HEY EIC, Mark Matibag, or whoever, I need more Chichi. Do you know anything? Text me.

If you don’t know me, let’s keep it that way.]

DEL MONTE PHILIPPINES

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