June one mag02 exc fn

June 2015

COMING SOON THIS MONTH Church Meeting Prayer Evening Quiz Fundraiser

CHURCH MEETING— CHANGE OF DATE Thursday 18th June

PRAYER EVENING Thursday 24th JUNE

8PM

8pm MISSION PRAYER MEETING Monday 8th June 7.30pm

SARAH CALLEN’S FUNDRAISING QUIZ Saturday 27th June

DON’T FORGET TO SUBMIT YOUR ARTICLES….

More information on how to do this on the back page.

WELCOME BACK Exams, exam, exams….. It is the season that both young people and parents of young people look forward to the most—or maybe not!

If you are struggling to cope, read on.

This month’s edition has a number of handy hints from those who went through the exam process not so long ago and from practised parents in supporting.

Interested in learning more about being a Street Pastor? Check out Steve’s article on page 24. Also this month, a few words from Janet and Peter on the work that they do in one of our local schools, a report on how the new Parenting course is doing and as a special treat—a health & safety update! All this, as well as our usual regular features and a photographic reminder of Easter.

Thank you to everyone who submitted articles this month. We wouldn’t have a magazine without you!

Emma Leggett

CONTENTS A Survivor’s Guide to Exam Season Supporting Exams:

Children

4

Through



Sarah

7



Lauren

8



Anita

20

Nepal Appeal

9

Schools Ministry

10

Parentalk

11

Easter photos

12

One Fellowship News

14

Report from the Elf & Matey Team

16

One Ministry

18

Prayer Diary

21

Church Meeting Feedback

22

Focus On ….. Street Pastors

24

A Survivor’s Guide to the Exam Season It hardly seems like a few weeks since I wrote about the start of the new school year and here we are in the final term and facing that wonderful season - exam time! It has to be said that every year there seem to be changes to the exam system and the curriculum in England so for most parents it will never be the same twice in a row.

Whereas one child might have sweated for hours over a seemingly infinite number of coursework assignments and then had a few exams at the end of Year 11, the next to pass through the system may have 25 or more exams to sit all in a few weeks. Whatever the system, it is a time of anxiety for the young people as well as their parents.

Have they done enough revision?

How much is enough? Are they

under too much pressure? Should we bribe them or threaten dire consequences if they do not get the results of which they are capable?

It is fair to say that recently much has been said about the numbers of teenagers with mental health problems and that must in part be linked to the vast pressure they are under to perform in exams. I do not think that those of us who are parents of teenagers and who passed through the system in the past had half as much pressure on us nor were we told every year if our results were good that it was only because the exams were easier now. If we did well or badly, ultimately it was down to us and most of us muddled through, some better than others. Looking back, I do not think I could have

coped with the kind of academic pressure my own children have been put under, from their primary school days onwards. Schools are judged by their results so teachers also feel the pressure and undoubtedly pass it on, albeit reluctantly or unwittingly in some cases.

Therefore, as a Christian parent and teacher, how should I respond in this period of stress and tension, not to mention coping with the sheer hard work needed to get young people through this time without a complete meltdown? Well, I suppose that the first thing I try to remember is that God does not value us for our qualifications. It is of no importance to him how many GCSEs we have or whether we attended a Russell Group university or none at all. God looks at the heart and surely this is what a Christian parent should be most concerned about. Our Christian teens need to be reminded that God loves them no matter what.

Jeremiah 29:11 New International Version (NIV) 11 For I know the plans I have for you,� declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.�

It is also well that we remember the parable of the talents. As a Christian parent, we should be encouraging our children to do their best with whatever talent and ability God has entrusted to them. He will multiply the harvest. I always say to my own three children and to all those I teach that giving your best is all that can be expected and if you do that, you can hold your head up high.

I hope that as this exam season gets underway, we as parents can remember that God is watching and is there to comfort and encourage us and our children, whether they

come skipping out of the exam hall or not.

God bless you all - luck has nothing to do with it!

Catherine Dodson

Schools Ministry Peter and I have the privilege of hearing groups of children read each week. There is a huge range in reading levels in a year group, and the teachers at Norwood School deal with this every day, along with all the other demands of the curriculum.

I think the children like having the full attention of an adult, and it is rewarding to see their progress. Their world is very different from the one Peter and I knew as children, but under the surface they have the same hopes and fears as ever.

We share laughter together. “Mobile home” was a new concept for one child. “What do you think it is?” I asked. “Somewhere you keep your mobile phones?” 21st century child with 20th century old fogey!

Janet Giles

My involvement at Norwood school is a very rewarding experience; I particularly enjoy the warm and welcoming atmosphere. It never ceases to amaze me at the unique personalities each child possesses.

On average I listen to about 10 to 12 children read and the range of topics they choose is very varied and wide ranging. Animals are a favourite and one child has a passion for Pirates.

Playtime is something I enjoy, the children are more relaxed and great fun to watch especially the energy they possess. Some of the children I know from First Friends here at EBC and its good to see them again.

Our Church is host to a number of events staged by the school and we enjoy a healthy relationship with staff and pupils.

Peter Tattersal

Supporting Children Through Exams - Sarah Having three children, my poor parents haven’t had an exam free year for at least 7 years (if my GCSE maths has enabled me to calculate that right!). I guess by now they are pretty well practised at supporting us through them, but looking back they were never that bad!

So, how have my parents supported me and my brothers through our exams?

Firstly, they took an interest in our subjects. My parents have had to do A level Biology three times in the last 5 years! Yet, they were always willing to test each of us if we asked them to. They also watched ‘Of Mice and Men’ with me for GCSE English and chatted about long-shore drift for GCSE Geography whilst walking along a beach somewhere (Yes, holidays can be educational!).

They didn’t nag us about how important exams are. If a child goes

to school they will have heard that their exams are important. Teachers don’t stop going on about it. I think most children feel stressed about their exams even if they don’t show it (like I did!). I am glad that my parents supported me rather than put extra pressure on me.

Finally, I know they always prayed for us. Exams are stressful, for children and parents alike. Parents can help to an extent but at the end of the day it’s out of their control how their child does. But it’s not out of God’s control.

I’m happy to say that I have finally come to the end of having exams for a while, so I would just like to say thanks to my parents for supporting me through them and I wish you (and Stephen) all the best with the three years of exams you probably still have to come!

Sarah Cleary

Supporting Children Through Exams - Lauren I must confess, it’s been a little while since I’ve sat any exams! However, studying maths and physics at college was exam heavy and now I’ve completed my apprenticeship, I can empathize with the stress of coursework deadlines too.

My biggest worry for young people today is that there is a HUGE amount of pressure on them as they go through the education system. From the age of 14, it seems planning your future begins and as someone who’s never really known what to do, I found this hard. Career advisers gave suggestions based on what I enjoyed or what I was good at but this all hangs on exam results.

When exam season hits, it’s all the teachers talk about, all any of your peers worry about and it was definitely the last thing I needed to hear from my parents! Added pressure from home sometimes

meant I was too stressed out to accomplish anything productive.

Thankfully, my parents know me better now and I remember during my last year of college starting final exams, there was a card waiting for me on the dining room table - it was a good luck card from my parents saying they loved me and that they wished me luck.

As parents, I think it’s important for your children to know and understand the importance studying.

As long as they do, I’m certain they won’t need any more pressure from you – there’s so much pressure on them from elsewhere.

Also, a quick shout out to any young people entering exam season – do believe me when I say there will be an end to all the exams and coursework one day!

Lauren Wade

Think4photop/shutterstock.com

Nepal Appeal BMS World Mission is responding to the two terrible earthquakes that have hit Nepal. The first struck on 25th April killing thousands and leaving many more homeless. The second happened on 12th May claiming more lives and devastating the country further.

BMS currently have 21 workers in Nepal, most of whom have been working with the Nepali people for many years. Through these workers and BMS’s trusted partners on the ground, BMS are co-ordinating a response that will not only deal with immediate relief needs, but will focus on long-term recovery, well after the world’s media have moved on. *

* source: www.bmsworldmission.org

Many miles away, here at Eastleigh Baptist Church, your hearts were moved by the situation the Nepali people now find themselves in.

Together we raised £2,100 which has been sent to BMS to support the work they are doing in the country.

Thank-you!

Schools Ministry Peter and I have the privilege of hearing groups of children read each week. There is a huge range in reading levels in a year group, and the teachers at Norwood School deal with this every day, along with all the other demands of the curriculum.

I think the children like having the full attention of an adult, and it is rewarding to see their progress. Their world is very different from the one Peter and I knew as children, but under the surface they have the same hopes and fears as ever.

We share laughter together. “Mobile home” was a new concept for one child. “What do you think it is?” I asked. “Somewhere you keep your mobile phones?” 21st century child with 20th century old fogey!

Janet Giles

My involvement at Norwood school is a very rewarding experience; I particularly enjoy the warm and welcoming atmosphere. I never cease to be amazed at the unique personality each child possesses.

On average I listen to about 10 to 12 children read and the range of topics they choose is very varied and wide ranging. Animals are a favourite as are pirates!

Playtime is something I enjoy, the children are more relaxed and great fun to watch especially the energy they possess. Some of the children I know from First Friends here at EBC and it’s good to see them again.

Our Church is host to a number of events staged by the school and we enjoy a healthy relationship with staff and pupils which is such a blessing.

Peter Tattersal

As I arranged the chairs In Scantabout with the familiar background music synonymous with a Tuesday in Wells Place, I wondered if maybe I was the only frazzled, greying, mum in the world who did not get the manual when Emily was born. I started to ponder whether no one would turn up to the Parentalk course, as beneath their well controlled, organized super parenting facades they actually were totally in control, thoroughly organized and super duper parents.

Thankfully at 8pm I was joined by 16 fantastic parents who also did not get the manual when their little bundles of joy were delivered!

Our evenings have been led by myself, Sara Henry or Anne Kinnaird.

The time is split between a video, chatting through ideas and thoughts brought up in the videos and eating cake. It is a lovely relaxed time of fellowship, encouragement and

space just to think through how we approach life with the kids!

Many thanks for all our offers of babysitting, whether you have been taken up on your offer or not, you have been a great encouragement.

To our fabulous band of cake makers, thank you, delicious!

And too those lovely 16 parents who have joined together for an hour and a half in an attempt to understand both the kids and the art of parenting a little better, thank you too!

Quote of the course so far: They (the children) are a great excuse to buy scalextric!

We are now on week 4 of our journey but the Parentalk course will continue to run until 2nd June term time only, please feel free to come and join us. Tuesdays 8 pm Wells Place Centre.

Corrina Bishop

EASTER PHOTOS Palm leaves—all ready for the donkey to arrive……...

No sign yet—let’s do some face painting….

….and have a look round the crafts…..

…...and watch some magic tricks…...

Good Friday service at All Saints

Singing at All Saints

...and some craft…..

Hurray! Animals arrive and the crowds increase …….

Good Friday prayer walk

….and some storytelling…..

Donkey not keen on those palm leaves but happy drawing the crowds outside

Easter morning sunrise service (once the sun came up …….obviously!)

Report from the Elf and Matey Team We have been asked to write this brief note for ONE magazine to let you know that all is well, but could be better!

inspect equipment and premises. As necessary we organise/arrange remedial action.

Elf and Matey are not who you may think we are!

Because we think it is important and that it is the Lord's command to look after each other.

Who is your health and safety team at EBC and Wells Place Centre?

Catherine Spencer, Christine Leaman, Emma Leggett, Paul Marchese, Alan Saunders, Richard Hicks, and Christopher Harvey

Why do we do it?

Leviticus 19:16b "Don’t do anything that would put your neighbour’s life in danger. I am the Lord."

What do we do?

All sorts of things that help to keep everyone as safe as can be reasonably possible when using our buildings and attending events that we put on.

We review risk assessments, working practices, training needs, check and

From time to time we will report to you through this magazine and church meetings.

Annually we are required to organise fire drills - we are sorry that the last one interrupted such a great hymn!

A number of things were learnt a few

weeks ago and we have to correct some things!

Please be reminded of the fire escape procedure that we have in place for Sunday services, as shown on the screens. Have you read and noted the plan?

"In the event of the fire alarm sounding please leave the building by the nearest fire exit, as directed by the stewards and deacons. For the church, these are the main entrance/exit and the side door behind the stage (platform) which exits onto the road. Please do not use the door from the church leading into the Wells Place Centre.

Having left the building please make your way to the evacuation point which is outside the McDonalds restaurant.

For those with children in Sunday School or crèche, please note that their teachers / leaders will ensure that they are evacuated from the building and will be available for collection from the evacuation point only."

Please help us in our ministry by letting us know of any concerns you have; and may the Lord bless and keep you.

Christopher Harvey

By the time you read this you and your children may be in the full swing of exams or perhaps coming to the end. Revision timetables will probably have been drawn up, maybe you have been sitting with your child trying to help them make sense of some tricky area that you can’t get your head round either. This time of year can be particularly stressful for families.

Having been through this time of year many times with our children I can fully sympathise. It is not easy, it has to happen and we cannot

do it for them. We want our children to achieve the very best for themselves. So where does that leave us as parents? I believe we need to make sure that the home is a place where they feel safe, a place where they know they are loved and a place where they can be themselves. I always found the ‘being themselves’ bit the hardest and at times challenging.

But it is because they feel secure that they can be themselves and let off steam. It is important as parents not to take it all personally!

‘Start children off on the way they should go and even when they are old they will not turn from it.’

Proverbs 22 v6 I asked our own children how it was for them during exam season at home. Each

of them approached exams in a very different way. One said I made her revise but that she is grateful I did even if she hated it at the time. She always made sure she revised in ‘school times’ not what she said was ‘her time’. However, she also remembered that I provided ‘yummy food’ at intervals to keep her going. Another of our children said I let him have his music on loud along with ‘football manager’. I remember thinking how can he possibly revise with all these distractions. Is he actually revising?

He did well despite my

fears! Our other child had to have everything very quiet and she had to revise non-stop. So, each child needed a different environment and we had to learn to respect that. We had to learn to go with the flow, which is most definitely not the easiest thing for me to do! I felt I had to make sure other things around them were calm and to make sure meals were ready and there were little treats.

For us as a family it was all a big learning experience. There was no training for it, we muddled our way through. I think it is great

that today there are such things as parenting courses.

I would encourage everyone to take up this opportunity when it is available.

‘Care for the Family’ is also a great resource with a lot of material available for families at all stages.

I remember being told that as parents what we are doing is preparing our children to live independently.

This parenting is challenged during exams, but stick with them, and love them through it. I think parenting stops but being a parent never stops. Lynda Wisbey.

As a young person who has been supported through SATs, GCSEs, A Levels and now university exams, I know how important it is to have family and friends around during the torture that is revision and exams. Each person handles revision differently so my main suggestion is for parents to sit down with their young person and ask them how they can best help them. This way you’re both clear from the start what your involvement will be. It might be that your child wants to be left alone to revise and it is important to respect their requests and to resist the urge to check on them at regular intervals unless they specifically ask for this. However, most

young people do appreciate words of encouragement and food to help get them through.

For parents whose children are no longer living at home, you can still send encouragement and food parcels. These are always very well received by students! Finally, the most important thing to do during revision and exams is to pray for and with your child.

Whether this is in person, over the phone or separately, it is a huge way that you can help your child.

I hope this helps those parents who find revision time as stressful as their children, remember that the best thing to do is to give the situation to God because He brings peace and He always triumphs!

‘Words of encouragement and food’

Anita Borton

PRAYER DIARY Please pray for...

INDIA

Firstly, please pray for all those in Nepal, India and China who are affected by the recent earthquake and avalanches.

We need to pray for Christians round the world who risk persecution, violence and death each day as they seek to worship Jesus.

Attacks on Christians are more frequent now. Churches have been demolished; pray that these Christians can find new places to meet. Pray also that the government will honour its pledge to protect religious minorities.

IRAN CHINA Christians who attend “unregistered� churches are at risk of intimidation.

They can be imprisoned without cause. We ought to thank the Lord for their amazing courage, and pray for all Christians in China who live in fear.

Pastor Nadarkhani was imprisoned on false charges and released after a worldwide campaign.

Recently intelligence agents raided the home of three other leaders of his church, confiscating Bibles and Christian literature. Pray for this church and its members, and pray that this confiscated literature may be read by some of the persecutors!

HOME Thank you Lord that we are free to worship in this country. Make us more mindful of the privilege that we have, and to use every opportunity we have to pray for, and witness to, others.

Janet Giles

Joth opened our AGM with a devotion on Ephesians 6, using the metaphor of our church as an army equipped and standing firm together, united, with the Holy Spirit breathing His strength into us. Following apologies and acceptance of previous meetings’ minutes, we moved onto Membership matters. Nick Bishop is resigning as Church Secretary and was thanked for all his hard work during his time in that role.

Eddie Sava and Sheila Fletcher were approved for new membership and several people have been taken off the roll. Lynda Wisbey brought several

pastoral issues to the meeting for prayer.

Emma Leggett and Chris Harvey then presented themselves for re-election onto the diaconate. They have both contributed enormously to the church and were voted back on.

We all stood and surrounded them in prayer.

Joth presented the Minister’s report, which included the Leaders’ weekend away, several non-EBC business events, looking into a possible new business model for the coffee shop and also diaconate/leadership models for the future and the upcoming Discipleship Programme. Toby shared

some personal reflections of interactions within Wells Place.

A review of the Annual Report (see booklet) followed; Richard Knight gave us a brief overview of the current finances and of the status of several projects, including the Scotter Road Manse, plans for conversion of 56, Desborough Road and the completion of the South Wall repairs.

Emma Leggett then brought us the Wells Place Centre report; business is good and from last year’s profit, we have spent 14.5K on the new washrooms and the rest will go to EBC

maintenance. She will be sending out a questionnaire regarding use of the Coffee Shop, for feedback as they examine best business practices.

During a review of Evangelism and Outreach, we discussed Easter celebrations, the most popular of which seemed to be the lovely Maundy Thursday service and the animals at the Big Welcome.

Plans for HOPE 2015 were described by Chris Harvey.

During July 6-12th following a Launch service on May 17th, 16 churches in all will be involved. Chris also informed us that he is stepping down from his position as

Chairman to CTiE and that Guy Whitehouse will continue as Secretary.

Ruth Sichel shared some of her moving experiences on mission in Cambodia. She will be on leave till October.

Jeremy Borton talked about his upcoming mission in Frimley between 1-10th May. In any other business, we briefly discussed the implementation of the new Debt Management Centre in Eastleigh. A team of 3 including Russell Giles have been appointed to consider the way forward.

The meeting then closed in prayer.

Fi Luland

Focus on …..Street Pastors You’ve just watched the 10 O’clock news on Friday night after a hard week at work and you are warm and cosy. So what are you going to do next? Well for around 32 local church volunteers once every few weeks they get out their Street Pastor uniform, come down to Wells Place and 4 or 5 of them gather, pray and then go out onto the Streets of Eastleigh to listen, care and help.

Street Pastors have been patrolling in Eastleigh since July 2009, yet the whole organisation only came into being in 2003. From those early beginnings there are now over 12,000 trained Street Pastors in 270 towns and cities.

So what do we do and why do we do it? It is a practical way of demonstrating the church in

Eastleigh’s love for our town. We want this to be a safe and happy place, we want to connect and engage with the people in our town and we want those that are out enjoying themselves to be safe. In the summer and earlier parts of the evening we may walk out to Grantham Green or Fleming Park where we’ll meet mainly youth and children – we’ll chat, encourage them and often share the sweets we carry.

Later in the evening we talk with those out in the town centre - from teens to those in their 80s. It can be anything from a cheery chat to listening to people’s difficulties sympathetically and without judgement. Occasionally we signpost people to other organisations, make phone calls where phones are dead, walk people home or past areas where they have a concern. We also carry flip-flops for

those women who were a little overoptimistic in the comfort of their footwear at the start of the evening and end up walking barefoot.

But there are so many other benefits too. We work in conjunction with our partners the Police and the Local Authority, working with their permission. They are very supportive of us and welcome us being out on the Streets – indeed I think they would be happy for us to be out there every night! Street Pastors has also proved to be a way of building contacts and friendships between members of different churches in Eastleigh - we currently have people involved from 9 different churches.

There are 15 current Street Pastors from Eastleigh Baptist Church, including me as the co-ordinator . We also currently supply the treasurer for the group (Alan Saunders).

Who can be a Street Pastor and how do you become one? You have to be a member of a local church, over 18 and attend around 50 hours of training. References are also obtained and DBS checks carried out. The training covers such areas as safety on the streets, drugs, alcohol, mental health, how the police work, an understanding of youth. We now carry out our training together with a number of other areas across Hampshire.

The next training is concentrated over three autumn weekends (11-13 and 25-27 Sept and 9-11 October). If you want to know more email Eastleigh@streetpastors.org.uk or go to www.eastleigh.streetpastors.org.uk .

Steve Smallwood

Articles for the next edition of One should be emailed to Linda Mandley no later than the 8th June 2015.

Please note that, due to space restrictions, articles may be edited by the team. If you have any photographs or other images you would like us to include, please email these as well and we will do our best to include them.

We hope that One will be used to share your thoughts, prayers and experiences with the rest of the fellowship and we look forward to receiving your articles.

www.eastleighbaptist.org.uk 023 8061 3210