Durango Telegraph - September 12, 2019

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FREE Sept. 12, 2019

Vol. XVIII, No. 37 durangotelegraph.com

inside

T H E

O R I G I N A L

I N D I E

W E E K L Y

L I N E

O N

D U R A N G O

&

B E Y O N D

Overpass impasse?

Under the radar

Epically human

City debates where to prioritize pedestrian crossing funds p8

Changes to GJ doppler may clear up mysteries of area skies p10

Theatre of the Wild’s ‘Lobuje’ scales heights of humor p14

AARP Durango Chapter #1243, La Plata County Senior Services and AARP ElderWatch are proud to announce

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Fight fraud, shred instead!

Three boxes or one large trash bag per car.

Nonperishable food donation appreciated.

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2 n Sept. 12, 2019

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lineup

8

4 La Vida Local

Ear to the ground: “I paid 100 percent full retail!”

– One woman’s rebellious boast in this modern age of online shopping and thrifting

Bridging the gap City debates shifting priorities from 32nd Street to Camino, other areas

4 Thumbin’ It

by Tracy Chamberlin

5 Word on the Street

10

6-7 Soapbox

Under the radar NWS proposes lowering radar angle to better capture Four Corners skies

11 Mountain Town News

by Missy Votel

12-13 Day in the Life

12

16 Flash in the Pan

Over the hump

Doom’s day

thepole

RegularOccurrences

When it comes to adventuring in the Four Corners, no one may be as well-traveled (or multi-talented) as Doom. (And if you don’t believe us, check out his Insta feed, republicofdoom.)

Also known as Steve Fassbinder, the Devo Explorer coach and former pro mountain biker has spent the last dozen or so years exploring the Southwest via pack raft, foot, bike and rope. And now he wants to share the fun (all a relative term) with others.

This Fri., Sept. 13, Doom will be launching his new multi-sport adventure guide service, Four Corners Guides, at Pine Needle Dry Goods starting at 6:30 p.m. He will be joined by partner in crime (and life and business) Lizzy Scully as well as fellow adventurer par excellence, Thad Ferrell.

Doom & Lizzy

17 Top Shelf

Hanging with the camel’s cuter and cuddlier cousin, the alpaca photos by Stephen Eginoire

18 On the Town

14

20 Ask Rachel

Wild things Durango’s Theatre of the Wild scales heights of humor with “Lobuje”

21 Free Will Astrology

by Donna Stewart

22 Classifieds

16

22 Haiku Movie Review

Bar food elevated

On the cover: A young alpaca inspects the camera at the Pleasant Journey Alpaca Farm in Hesperus./ Photo by Stephen Eginoire

At last, a gourmet jalapeño popper that commands respect (and beer)

by Ari LeVaux

boilerplate

EDITORIALISTA: Missy Votel (missy@durangotelegraph.com) ADVERTISING AFICIONADO: Lainie Maxson (lainie@durangotelegraph.com) RESIDENT FORMULA ONE FAN: Tracy Chamberlin (tracy@durangotelegraph.com)

T

he Durango Telegraph publishes every Thursday, come hell, high water, beckoning singletrack or monster powder days. We are wholly owned and operated independently by the Durango Telegraph LLC and

STAR-STUDDED CAST: Lainie Maxson, Chris Aaland, Clint Reid, Stephen Eginoire, Jesse Anderson, Ari LeVaux, Allen Best, Tracy Chamberlin, Zach Hively, Shan Wells and Donna Stewart VIRTUAL ADDRESS: www.durangotelegraph.com

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We’re only human. If, by chance, we defame someone’s good name or that of their family, neighbor, best

friend or dog, we will accept full responsibility in a public flogging in the following week’s issue.

Although “free but not easy,” we can be plied with schwag, booze and flattery.

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“I’ve been taking people on wild tours by bicycle and packraft to the far corners of the Southwest for over a decade now,” Fassbinder said. “Now we’ll have the opportunity to share our adventures and lifestyle much more widely. We’re stoked.”

So far, trip options include one- and three-day intros to bike-rafting trips as well as something called the “Doom” trip, a sort of build-your-own adventure that we would assume is a little more … adventurous.

Ferrell, who will serve as one of Doom’s lead guides, also recently started his own fly fishing guide service, King Fischer Fly Guides. He’ll open the night’s festivities with slides and plenty of, uh, fish tales. Then, Doom will take the stage, with short films (which may or may not include his recent ditty for Sierra Nevada, in which he is shown multiple times “not” drinking beer) as well as photos from his adventures around the Southwest and the world. This will include his latest traverse of the San Juans by bike, llama and packraft with local artist and mountain bike master Jon Bailey and Fort Lewis College Outdoor Pursuits Director Brett Davis.

Fassbinder and Scully will base their operations out of the cleverly conjoined Scullbinder Ranch, a remote 35-acre property on the Mancos River, bordering Weber Mountain and the Ute Mountain Ute Tribal Park. On the grounds there is a 1-mile pump track/bike park for warm-up laps. And for those who perhaps don’t enjoy an impromptu bivy in the dirt, there are even glamping opportunities in the works, featuring beds, linens and canvas tents.

For more info., go to www.fourcornersguides .com or www.kingfisherflyguides.com.

Sept. 12, 2019 n

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opinion

LaVidaLocal Bicycles are not cars I was T-boned by a guy on a bicycle. He was blond and dressed in retro workout gear, and he ran the stop sign at 24th and West 2nd right into my wife’s Mitsubishi, but he sprang up afterward like a crackhead and kept going without turning to look at us. We circled back to make sure he was alright, and the guy was just sitting on his bike when we found him, chatting with another cyclist. The other guy was laughing with disbelief as he listened to the guy who hit me, his hands waving wildly as he pantomimed the incident. I pulled up beside him, rolled down my window and asked if he was concussed. He waved me off with a casual apology and admitted to running the stop sign, so I left thinking everything was resolved.

We saw the dent when we got home, one that’s still cancerous with rust today, and we realized it’d be there forever because we can’t afford to spend money on cosmetic repairs. It wasn’t fair. And it definitely wasn’t possible to track down that cyclist because his bicycle wasn’t a car, so we hadn’t exchanged insurance information.

***

We’re all members of that “Durango Colorado Online Garage Sale” Facebook group – it’s the one thing that binds us: from the liberals downtown to the conservatives on the mesa, we’re all buying and selling and bickering in equal measure. And we never agree on cycle-related posts, especially this polemic one made by Andrea: “To the asinine bicyclist who thinks it’s ok to take up an entire lane of traffic on 3rd avenue at rush hour, take your finger and shove it!! It’s ass wipes like you that make drivers hate bikers!!!”

The thread got dirty quick, so I took screen shots before things could get deleted. Let’s get into it: First, the trolls came out. There were memes with dildos – mind you, on a public garage-sale site – and homophobia galore. A gentleman posted some common sense, saying we should be more like the Netherlands with protected bike lanes, but then someone named Dutch (which is ironic) called him a libtard.

Next, “G Von James” made a valid point about traffic regulations, saying it’s illegal to impede traffic on a bicycle, and a guy named Greggory quoted the laws and told people on both sides to “take a breath.” But then a guy named Lucas posted a meme of a car plowing through a crowd of bicyclists. Honestly, can you imagine being so insular during a time of mass murders that you’d post such a thing to your neighbors? I hate to say it, but we all know who Lucas voted for… anyway, moving on: Then a guy named Ron tried to leaven the Conservative Right with dignity, saying he was a Republican who rides and supports a system wherein the road is shared. But then immediately after Ron’s post, a guy named Cody (whose profile pic looked like a Wrangler ad) said, “steel bumpers make quick work of aluminum wheels.”

I doubt that if Cody met anyone from that thread at City Market, he’d suggest killing cyclists with his huge what-are-you-compensating-for truck. But behind Facebook’s cover, Cody had no issue implying murder was OK if you were in a hurry.

He’d made that comment to a lady named “Kay,” whose profile picture was of a paper heart, and her response was, “You want to run over me and my aluminum wheels when I’m on my bike? Like possibly murder me?” To which Cody re-

sponded, “… yeah, I might hit you, but it’ll be your own dumbass fault for throwing yourself in the way.”

This is the level of motorist vs. cyclist frustration that’s out there, and it exists outside Facebook because I watched a Jeep try to run a spandex-clad woman off Animas View Drive (she fought back with a middle finger) just last month. It happens regularly. We should probably do something.

I’m more of a motorist than I am a cyclist, and that’s how it is for the vast majority. Yes, I own a mountain bike, and I like to spend weekends on dirt trails (or the paved ones that lead to day drinking), but my car is more important. I use it on the road more than my bike because I drive to work. I get groceries. Sometimes, it rains or snows. But even if you’re a bicycling zealot who doesn’t own a car, you’ve got to know there will always be more cars on the road than bikes. You’ve got to admit that cars are better-suited for the road, especially when there’s a 55mph speed limit, and you’ve got to understand that logically, bikes should defer to cars for safety’s sake. So, I hate to say it because it’ll come across as sacrilegious in this town, but cyclists need to change if we’re going to defuse the frustration that leads idiots like Cody to threaten murder.

A good start would be for cyclists to actually follow the laws. Yes, Colorado law allows bicycles on roads, and cyclists are afforded the same rights as motorists (diehard cyclists cling to this like biblethumpers to their good book), but there are other laws that cyclists need to stop breaking when it’s convenient. For instance, did you know that bicycles need a headlight and taillight to be on the road after sunset (C.R.S. 42-4-221)? Did you know they have to pull over and let cars pass if they’re impeding traffic (C.R.S. 42-4-1412(5))? Hell, it’s even illegal for cyclists to take their hands off their handlebars for anything other than making required hand signals (of which the middle finger is not). If you’re a cyclist, and you want to enjoy the privilege of sharing the road, you need to follow all the laws, not just the ones that let you pedal in front of pickup trucks.

And maybe we need to go further. Maybe cyclists should be licensed and required to carry insurance, and maybe bicycles should be registered with license plates. That way, if one of them T-bones a broke-ass writer in a Mitsubishi, the innocent motorist isn’t stuck with a rusting dent. It’ll never happen, but it’s a good idea. Bikes with license plates would remind rednecks like Cody that cyclists are allowed on the road, forcing cyclists to register would make them learn the laws, and registration would require cyclists to carry insurance in case they cause accidents. Hell, it’d even help cops track down stolen bicycles.

But lastly, cyclists and motorists should be kind to one another. Just because you can “take up an entire lane of traffic on 3rd Avenue at rush hour” doesn’t mean you should. Or, if you’re stuck behind a bike, think before succumbing to road rage.

That bike isn’t killing our planet like your jacked-up truck, and the person on it is simply trying to be healthy. Do you really need to run someone off the road for making good choices? It’s true that bicycles aren’t cars, but cyclists are definitely humans, so don’t be like Cody.

This Week’s Sign of the Downfall:

Thumbin’It Hope for the Four Corners hot spot, with New Mexico environmental officials working on plans to address the state’s high levels of ozone pollution, which sadly knows no state boundaries

Record heat for Durango and the Four Corners in August and September along with the return of drought conditions

The government moving toward a ban on flavored e-cigarettes in response to hundreds of people being sickened by a mysterious vaping-related illness and an unprecedented number of teens picking up the habit

The D&SNGRR refusing to accept responsibility for the 416 Fire by attempting to have the $25 million suit brought against them by the federal government thrown out

The National Weather Service proposing tweaks to the Grand Junction radar to improve weather forecasting for the Four Corners, which is sorely lacking and often insufficient

4 n Sept. 12, 2019

– Jesse Anderson

The BLM opening up lands adjacent to Hovenweep National Monument to oil and gas development, despite opposition from local tribes and environmentalists

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Vegan Beef Cilla Carden is a vegan from Australia (making her the safest animal on the continent) who likes to wear leopard print despite the irony. Recently, Carden sued her neighbors for the “meat smells” that came from their barbecues, which was a mistake because Bailey Mason, a self-proclaimed “warrior for animal meat,” heard about the suit. Mason posted Carden’s home address on Facebook and planned a free, meat-only BBQ right outside; 3,000 people had committed before the event was canceled for safety concerns. But seriously though … leopard print?

WordontheStreet

Q

With Friday the 13th this week, the Telegraph asked, “What’s the unluckiest thing that’s happened Dan Huff to you?” “I got locked in an art store in Dublin.”

Alexander Allport

“I got monkshood, a toxic flower, on my hands.”

Henry Allport

“I got seven wasp stings this month.”

Jake Black

“Peeing in my pants in second grade.”

Jim Willeke

“The day I fell in love with a Jack Russell.”

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Sept. 12, 2019 n 5

SoapBox

ReTooned/by Shan Wells

Joining the Clean Cities movement To the editor, Cities across America are taking the lead on climate change action – creating the new energy market and shaping our planet’s future. In July at Denver’s “Clean Cities Renewable Energy Procurement Summit,” I had the fortune to meet dozens of sustainability directors from Maine to California. Big cities like Los Angeles, Phoenix and Philadelphia joined Cincinnati, Tallahassee and Raleigh to articulate paths to energy solutions, progress to date and projected timelines to 100 percent clean electricity, heating and transportation.

To begin to comprehend what’s involved in shifting big cities to clean energy, I needed a scale of reference. I knew that every year our local co-op LPEA, which covers parts of five rural counties, uses almost 1 GWh (gigawatt hour, or billion watts for one hour) of electricity. My imagination staggered hearing that each year San Jose (the tenth largest U.S. city) consumes 500 GWh and that Los Angeles uses 26,000 GWh. In light of these cities’ 100 percent commitments, I feel certain that our area – with our abundant sunshine, wide landscape, need for industry and love for our ecosystem – can figure out how to produce 1 GWh per year. And Durango is the key leader to the success of any Four Corners clean energy effort. We have the sunshine; all we need is committed leadership and a truly supportive community.

Leading is no small enterprise; we underappreciate its difficulty. Any person would rather avoid discomfort, and follow a popular path. Pursuing a daring goal sets a leader up for criticism, resistance and possible failure. So “prudent caution” suggests a leadership style based on community consensus of following polls and reacting to pressure from constituents.

In normal times, this makes sense. But when exis-4

6 n Sept. 12, 2019

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tential danger – such as climate change – is on the doorstep, “prudent caution” is a recipe for disaster. That’s why I find deeply encouraging the courage displayed by our 100 percent committed cities. There are times in history when constituents need to be shown the path –persuaded, educated, then simply pulled by the hand through the crisis. Never in history has there been as much of a need for strong leadership as NOW. Witness the strong leadership here in Colorado. Denver shares a commitment to reach 100 percent renewable electricity by 2030 with Boulder, Fort Collins, Golden, Lafayette and Longmont. Nederland aims for 100 percent by 2025. Breckenridge, Frisco, and the city and county of Pueblo commit to 100 percent by 2035. Of interest, Summit County has pledged to reach 100 percent renewable energy (which includes not only electricity but transportation and heating) by 2035. These great goals correspond well with Colorado’s worthy goals for utilities and communities.

My message to you, reader, is “take heart!” The Clean Cities Summit impressed me with the speed of progress by transitioning cities. I witnessed passionate commitment to confront the climate challenge, combined with comprehensive planning and technological expertise. Importantly, I found a culture of sincere readiness to share knowledge: “Any of us reaching the finish line alone has lost the race.” Durango is lucky to have our own committed Sustainability Director Imogen Ainsworth and a City Council ready to move on this matter. Our city is in a position to lead the Four Corners by example, forging a path that our neighbors can check out first-hand.

Let’s thank our forward-looking City Council for recently passing a resolution committing to renewable electricity goals (50 percent by 2030, 100 percent by 2050) and greenhouse gas emissions reduction goals (80 percent by 2050, 30 percent by 2030).

Responsive to resident comments, our Council is considering strengthening these goals by adding the criteria “locally produced” to “renewable electricity.” That would

support the creation of good careers within a locally owned industry and the chance to keep local a big chunk of LPEA’s $70 million/year electrical bill. Many residents take to heart the dire warnings from the International Panel on Climate Change that urge rapid action within the next decade. We therefore hope that Council will follow the example of our sister cities and make its 2030 goals more ambitious, thereby front-loading progress.

Join us at 6:30 p.m., Tues., Sept 17, at City Hall to thank our City Council for its climate commitments and to express your views about clean, cheap energy, stronger local economy, conservation and caring for our environment. Also, from 3 – 5 p.m. Nov. 9 come to “The Clean Cities Movement and Durango’s Future” at the Durango Library.

– Kirby MacLaurin, Durango

Protect patients from surprise bills To the editor, The American College of Emergency Physicians (ACEP) has been vocal about the need for a federal solution to protect patients from out-of-network, or surprise, billing.

Despite the distraction tactics and big-budget ad spends that have recently hijacked these important conversations, ACEP has been involved in Congressional discussions on this issue since early 2018 and has consistently supported a ban on balance billing of patients, as long as the mechanism ensures patient access to care won’t be compromised.

ACEP serves as the voice of individual emergency physicians regardless of where they practice. Our membership comprises emergency physicians from all walks of life who practice and are employed in a variety of work environments that range from academic settings or teaching hospitals, to emergency physician groups that are either managed or independently owned and operated by the physicians. In fact, the vast majority

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(85 percent) of emergency physician groups are made up of 50 or fewer physicians.

ACEP’s leadership is as diverse as our members, and once democratically elected by peers, the ACEP president represents the entire field of emergency medicine. ACEP’s Council, a legislative body of elected emergency physicians, votes on resolutions that serve as the foundation for ACEP’s federal and state advocacy positions.

On behalf of all emergency physicians, ACEP is concerned by several proposals currently being debated in Congress. Not only will they fail to adequately solve surprise bills for emergency patients, they could severely affect small emergency physician practices and threaten access to the vital health-care safety net they provide, particularly in rural and underserved communities.

Granting insurers license to squeeze physicians harder will push even more doctors out of network and put access to emergency care at risk. Allowing insurers to further manipulate rates will shift even more of the burden to patients while driving physicians out of the market.

Smaller physician groups are already disadvantaged when attempting to negotiate contracts with insurers, and they have expressed their concerns to Congress.

That’s why 60 smaller independent practices, which collectively provide emergency care to 7.3 million patients annually, sent a letter urging the House Education and Labor, and Ways and Means Committees to consider their unique perspective and the importance of making sure that federal legislation does not limit their ability to provide high-quality emergency care for patients.

ACEP will continue to work with Congress on behalf of all emergency physicians to find a federal solution to protect patients from out-of-network surprise billing that avoids any unintended consequences to the broader health-care system.

Visit www.ProtectEmergencyCare.org for more information.

– Steve Arnoff, The American College of Emergency Physicians

Sept. 12, 2019 n 7

LocalNews

Bridge too far?

City leaders reconsider trail plans along 32nd Street

by Tracy Chamberlin

T

he bridge is back. Years ago, city officials and residents debated the best way to get from Memorial Park on the northeastern end of the Animas River Trail, across 32nd Street, over the river and to Animas City Park, on the northwestern side. Today, that debate has resurfaced.

Back to the drawing board It started at the Parks and Recreation Advisory Board during discussions about the 2020 budget, which was expected to include $3.4 million for construction of a pedestrian bridge at 32nd Street.

Board member Seth Furtney said he questioned whether the funds would be better spent on other projects – and, as it turned out, other members agreed with him.

He explained that it’s not about whether the bridge has merit or value, but, for him, what would have to be forfeited to get it built. “It doesn’t reflect the best value for the city’s investment,” he added.

Furtney mentioned several projects he would consider top priorities if the $3.4 million was freed up – an underpass at Camino del Rio, redevelopment of Santa Rita Park, and connecting Three Springs to the Animas River Trail.

He’s not the only one talking about Camino del Rio. Others have highlighted the current crosswalks as safety concerns, suggesting those could be the spots where funds are needed most – not at 32nd Street.

But, safety is also the guiding principle for those who want a pedestrian bridge at 32nd Street. Many remember a young girl who was killed while riding her bike along 32nd decades ago, and are not willing to take the chance it could happen again.

“They are both unsafe crossings, and both require serious attention,” Rich Hoehlein, chair of the Parks and Recreation Advisory Board, said. “I don’t think we have to choose.”

In the beginning Almost a decade ago, city officials and staff started talking about extending the Animas River Trail to the north.

One of the keys to making that happen was the acquisition of 44 acres off Animas View Drive, later dubbed Oxbow Park and Preserve, which the city purchased in 2012.

The next step was figuring out how to connect the river trail, which essentially ended at 32nd Street, to this new property. Over the years, neighbors and residents argued about pathways, property rights, bridges, beaches and more. The discussions were, at times, contentious and exhausting, and at others cordial and effective.

The 32nd Street bridge, pictured above, was the site for a proposed pedestrian bridge that would connect Memorial Park on the east side of the Animas River to Animas City Park on the western side. The proposed pathway would allow people to cross the Animas River, Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad tracks and 32nd Street without having to walk next to or in front of vehicles on the roadway or trains on the tracks. The current setup is an at-grade crossing, which is one that is level with vehicles./File photo In the end, the City Council serving at that time chose to move forward with a specific plan for the northern extension of the Animas River Trail – one that included a pedestrian

1480 E. 2nd Ave. & 15th St. • 970-764-4577 www.jimmysmusic.supply 8 n Sept. 12, 2019

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bridge along 32nd Street.

The bridge would allow people to cross the Animas River, Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad 4

tracks and 32nd Street without having to walk next to or in front of vehicles or train cars.

In order to pay for it all, city officials reached out to Great Outdoors Colorado, or GOCO, a state organization tasked with taking proceeds from the Colorado Lottery and investing in parks, trails, wildlife, rivers and open spaces.

Over the years, GOCO estimates it has invested $1.2 billion into projects across the state.

The City of Durango has been the recipient of several GOCO grants worth millions, including one for $1.3 million awarded in 2017 for the northern extension of the Animas River Trail.

city has made commitments to GOCO and others. That’s a real concern.

“This project was approved by a prior Parks and Rec board,” he added.

“I don’t like the potential of reneging on a contract.”

It’s not just about backtracking on the bridge, either. For Hoehlein, it could be a bellwether for future boards and councils. “I think it’s a bad precedent,” he added.

Where the funds go

At this point, City Council has directed staff to look into the projects on 32nd Street and Camino del Rio. For Camino del Rio, the focus is a feasibility study. This would provide Giving up the grant details about the cost of an overpass According to city officials, the safety versus an underpass, what properties and connectivity of a pedestrian bridge could be affected, potential impacts to along 32nd was one of the things traffic, and more. The hope is to comGOCO liked about the plan and one of A rider quickly pedals across Camino del Rio from the east side near downtown Durango to the plete it by year’s end. the reasons the grant was approved.

For the pedestrian bridge at 32nd, west side along the Animas River Trail. Nearby is the HAWK crossing, which features flashing Now that the bridge is being debated lights to alert drivers. Camino del Rio and 32nd Street were found to be the top two most heavily the design process is also expected to be again, staff and council members felt it used roads in a recent traffic survey./Photo by Stephen Eginoire complete by the end of the year. The was important to contact GOCO and next step would be to solicit bids.

It’s uncharted territory, though, because the city has alfind out exactly what the consequences would be if the city One thing everyone agrees upon is that getting bids ways completed projects for which grant funds were re- could be a game-changer. decided to scrap the project.

“I would say GOCO answered that very carefully,” Parks quested. Once in the early 2000s, Metz said, officials looked The price tag for the pedestrian bridge is expected to be at building a bridge over Goeglein Gulch Road and talked about $3.4 million. But, if an actual bid came in much and Recreation Director Cathy Metz explained.

She said GOCO staff encouraged the city to delay the about seeking GOCO grants to fund the project. lower, like $1 or $2 million, it could sway some to go ahead But, the idea was soon scrapped and a grant application with the project. If it was much higher, like $5 million, it bridge project, instead of eliminating it. The city is expected to use the grant funds by September 2021, however, was never sent. “It’s never gone this far before,” she added. could sway others to take a step back.

Currently, city staff is preparing another grant application it could request an extension of up to a year.

According to Metz, the Council will review proposed If the decision is made to cut the bridge plan, the city for GOCO. This one would help pay for a swim beach at Lake budgets and recommendations on capital improvement could lose some of the $1.3 million in GOCO funds. Metz Nighthorse and is expected to be submitted in October. projects, like the 32nd Street bridge, on Oct. 8-9. Decisions Hoehlein said he certainly would support a debate about would be made by Council following those meetings. estimated about $500,000 of the total grant would have gone toward the bridge, so that could be the amount lost if the priorities and whether or not a pedestrian bridge is the best “Ultimately, the City Council will make this decision,” place to put the city’s limited funding. But, at this point, the she added. n City Council decides not to build a pedestrian bridge.

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Sept. 12, 2019 n

9

LocalNews

Weather or not NWS proposes changing Grand Junction radar to capture more of Four Corners skies

by Missy Votel

T

he doughnut hole that is Four Corners weather forecasting could be getting a lot smaller.

The National Weather Service in Grand Junction has announced plans to alter its Doppler radar in order to take in more of Southwestern Colorado, northwestern New Mexico and southeastern Utah. Plans call for lowering the scan angle of the radar, located high on the Grand Mesa, so it will take in more of the lower elevations in the atmosphere, where many storms originate.

According to Jeff Colton, a meteorologist with the NWS in Grand Junction, radar beams travel in a straight line. However, due to the Earth’s curvature, by the time the radar 125 miles away reaches the Four Corners, it is too high to do much good in forecasting storms.

“By the time the radar hits Durango, it’s 25,000 feet up in the atmosphere, so it can’t see the bottom of most storms,” he said.

“We are proposing to lower the elevation scan, which will allow us to see more of the atmosphere.”

The plan will require no physical changes to the radar, simply a software change.

The change could be a particular boon to skiers. “It will help us see more winter precipitation farther out that we can’t see right now until it’s closer,” he said.

Although Telluride already sees fairly good coverage from the Grand Junction radar, he said the change will improve forecasting accuracy for Purgatory and northern La Plata County. It will also vastly improve forecasting for Cortez, Montezuma County and Northern New Mexico.

Unfortunately, here in La Plata County, improvements will only be marginal – it’s nothing personal, just a topography thing.

“There are a lot of mountains that block that radar around Durango,” he said. “There will be some improvement, but not so much.”

But, there is a silver lining.

Earlier this year, the Colorado Department of Local Affairs awarded La Plata County $1.7 million to help install a permanent local radar system. The county is currently working out details, such as location, but there is no set timeline.

In the meantime, local weather buffs can consult the radar on loan from University of Oklahoma that is perched on top of Missionary Ridge (www.arrc.ou.edu/px1000) which will be on-site until Sept. 30. That radar was

Forecasting weather over the Four Corners could get a lot more accurate with changes proposed by the NWS to lower the angle of its doppler radar in Grand Junction./ File photo made possible through a partnership between the county and the Colorado Division of Homeland Security and Emergency Management. The NWS is currently accepting comments on a draft Environmental Analysis on the proposed change through Sept. 18.

Colton said his forecast for when the changes could go into effect is cloudy. “It could be a few years,” he proffered.

To read the draft EA or for more info, visit: www.roc.noaa.gov/WSR88D/Safety andEnv/EAReports.aspx. n

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MountainTownNews Black birds and other acts of public art JACKSON, Wyo. – “Human moments” instead of “battle scenes” will be the defining theme of an updated veterans’ monument in the Jackson Town Square.

What this means, says the Jackson Hole News&Guide, is that there will be no half-raised flag at Iwo Jima, no helicopters soaring over the rice paddies of Vietnam. Instead, the images will be of soldiers in nonviolent, and sometimes touching, snapshots of history that reflect each of the last century’s major conflicts.

A memorial already exists, but the veterans’ organization wanted to get it updated to include the 500 local veterans of the Persian Gulf and Iraq wars and to provide space for those of future wars.

The town’s Public Art Task Force wanted a memorial that provides only the names, similar to the Vietnam Veterans’ Memorial in Washington D.C. But the American Legion insisted that images also be included. Possibilities include the Japanese surrender on the USS Missouri in 1945 or soldiers helping children in war-torn countries.

War memorials come under the heading of public art. So do the arches of antlers positioned at each of the corners of the Town Square. The News&Guide, in a supplement produced in conjunction with the community’s annual Fall Arts Festival, points out that the first arch was erected by the Rotary Club in 1953. Contributions of elk, moose and other antlers were invited. Joined by arches on the other corners in the 1960s, they created what Pete Karns, a contemporary Rotarian, describes as a unique feature of Jackson.

“They’re recognized all over the world,” he says.

But another chapter of public art was done covertly and survives only in collections. Its perpetrator, Thom Ross, described it as a prank.

What inspired the prank is not entirely clear, but the execution was such that he managed to fool even himself. Then a new resident of the valley, Ross, with help from friends, created 150 raven-sized plywood cut-outs, painted them black and put them on fence posts.

Seeing one or two ravens on fence posts is not something to attract much attention. But people noticed whenever a fence post had one. By the way, while a group of crows is called a murder, a group of ravens is called a congress or, alternately, an unkindness.

After that, Ross became a professional artist, but he regards that prank to be his best work yet.

Vail loses two of its founding fathers VAIL – Vail, as a mountain resort, has two distinct threads since its founding in 1962. One is the 10th Mountain Division, which was headquartered at nearby Camp Hale from 1942-44. The other was its Alpine inspiration.

In recent weeks, the community lost two pivotal figures from both dimensions.

The first was Sandy Treat Jr, who took up skiing at Lake Placid and then, as a 19-year-old, made his way to Colorado to train at Camp Hale, on what is now considered the “back” side of Vail Mountain. He skied and went on to participate in the attack on the German stronghold at Riva Ridge in Italy’s Apennine Mountains.

He never did ski while in combat, though, nor did many of the 10th Mountain troopers.

After the war, he returned to Dartmouth College where he captained the ski team and, fluent in three languages, moved to a career with Alcan Aluminum, working around the world. He retired in 1984 as president of Alcan Canada Products in Toronto and the next year moved to Vail, where he skied until 2009, at the age of 86.

Pepi Gramshammer also died recently. He was a native of Austria, where he was a member of the national ski team. Several of Vail’s founders – two of them 10th Mountain Division veterans – courted him in 1962, the year of the resort’s founding. They wanted to see a professional skier call Vail home, thereby adding legitimacy to the upstart resort.

With his race winnings and sponsorship money, Gramshammer was able to open a Hotel Gastof Gramshammer, in 1964.

Telluride considers short-term rental tax TELLURIDE – Telluride voters in November will decide whether to institute a 2.5 percent special tax on short-term rentals. This is in addition to normal lodging taxes.

A divided town council had declined to adopt such a tax last year.

This drive to put a tax before voters was initiated by a group of citizens who believe the proliferation of short-term rentals has hurt the

housing market for locals, explains the Telluride Daily Planet.

Pepper Raper, one of those behind the vote, defended the tax as a means to provide revenue for affordable housing. “A vote for affordable housing is a vote for the economy,” she said, according to the Planet. “We want a workforce that can be here on time.”

But there is much opposition. Stacey Ticsay, who has a cleaning business centered around short-term rentals, told council members she can pay her mortgage because of Airbnbs. “They fill a niche in our economy. They attract price-sensitive visitors.”

Michael Martelon, of the Telluride Tourism Board, echoed the warning of ski company chief executive Bill Jensen, who discouraged the town council last year from adopting such a tax. The council heeded Jensen’s advice, voting 5-2 against.

This time, council members agreed to put it before voters, but with little enthusiasm.

If adopted, the total state and local taxes levied on lodging in Telluride would reach 15.15 percent, says Kevin Geiger, the town attorney. It is currently 12.65 percent, including 2 percent for the airline guarantee program.

It gets more complicated, he says, as Telluride has only three true hotels that are taxed as commercial properties. Other units are classified as residential. The former is taxed at 29 percent of assessed value, and the latter at 7 percent. The three hotels would be exempt from the tax.

Telluride has been one of the most ambitious developers of deed-restricted affordable housing going back to the 1990s, when it adopted a half-cent sales tax to finance affordable housing. Each year, it has had at least one project go forward.

Last year, it was a boarding house with 18 single-occupancy and 14 double-occupancy units. The single-occupancy units are about 200 square feet in size. The complex has two shared cooking spaces.

Telluride has also invested in three tiny houses as a temporary fix to employee housing. Two more projects are going forward, with occupancy expected by November, which together will provide 26 one- to four-bedroom units.

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Whistler women bare breasts in protest WHISTLER, B.C. – On a recent Sunday afternoon, women wearing nothing above their waists marched from the Olympic Rings in Whistler Village to the base of the ski mountain. Their point?

Denise Belisle, who has previously been involved in such displays of semi-nudity in Vancouver, says the purpose was to make a statement of empowerment, but also break the stigma surrounding breasts and their sexualization. “Men’s breasts can be just as sexy as women’s breasts, or they can be quite un-sexy, and they’re still allowed to be in public, right?” she said.

“So for me, that’s the whole reason behind it ... just to stir a little bit the beliefs of people, and their old way of thinking, and to break the stigma that breasts are sexual. It’s a big stigma to break, and that’s what we’re hoping to accomplish, and build up women’s equality in all areas of our lives.”

But a resident saw the flaunted nakedness as flawed. “It only serves to encourage sexualizing women and disrespect/disregard for their bodies and not in any regard makes them gender-equal to men as they claim,” wrote Gail McKellar in a letter in Pique Newsmagazine.

Aspen CEO accuses locals of snobbery ASPEN – After a bum snow winter in 2017-18, Aspen was blessed last winter. The ski season lasted 168 days, the longest since it opened in 1946. It was alos busy. Lift lines tended to be long. And there was an easy target: purchasers of the Ikon Pass. There were even bumper stickers: “Stop Ikonizing Aspen.”

The pass is offered by Alterra, which is partly owned by the Crown family, owners of Aspen Skiing Co. In both a recent meeting of the Aspen City Council covered by the Aspen Times, Kaplan defended the Ikon Pass as a strategic way to introduce Aspen to new and nontraditional audiences and diversify its customer base. The irony, he said, is that the company often gets criticized for catering to the rich and famous. He called the pushback “blatant snobbery.”

Of Ikon Pass skiers, 70 percent were new to Aspen, and many were from Colorado’s Front Range. They were younger, too: 13 percent owere younger than 18 compared to 3 percent of customers overall; and 27 percent were aged 25-34 compared to 19 percent overall.

– Allen Best

telegraph

Sept. 12, 2019 n 11

dayinthelife 12

n Sept. 12, 2019

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hat could b souled, mul Journey Alp to their grounds where

teleg

Warm fuzzies

by Stephen Eginoire

be more uplifting than a herd of gentleulti-colored alpacas? Fortunately, Pleasant paca Farm in Hesperus welcomes visitors e one can experience the intelligent, in-

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quisitive demeanor and absurd cuteness of these creatures. Hailing from the Andes of South America, these camelids are especially adapted to high-elevation terrain and can be found in the wild up to 16,000 feet above sea level. Here’s a look:

Sept. 12, 2019 n 13

thesecondsection

OnStage

Members of Theater of the Wild in a scene from “Lobuje” earlier this summer at the Fringe Festival in Fort Collins. The play, about a reallife climb to the 20,000-foot Himalayan peak, was performed on a makeshift climbing wall on the flatbed of a truck./Courtesy photo

Epically human Theatre of the Wild’s “Lobuje” offers answer to today’s radness overload

by Donna Stewart

“I

’m saying, let’s take f***ing action toward things that we’re passionate about, without apologizing and without reservation. We don’t have time for that,” Mike Largent, founder of Durangobased performance art troupe Theatre of the Wild, said.

It sounds like a battle cry, a pep rally-to-action before facing some sort of epic challenge. But Theatre of the Wild is out to challenge ideas about who and what exactly is “epic,” especially, but not exclusively, in the wild.

Truth is, we’re getting bored with titans. In the last few years, I’ve heard more than one person “meh” when the latest mountain climber story hits the theaters. With 500,000 peak baggers in Colorado alone, it’s getting so even free-soloist Alex Honnold has a hard time maintaining his level of appeal.

Audiences are starting to desensitize to epicness. We’ve struggled and lost right along with the best climbers in the world. Yet another climber spends days, weeks or even years confronting his or her limitations

JusttheFacts What: “Lobuje,” a play by Durango’s Theatre of the Wild When: 6:30 p.m., Sept. 12-14 Where: “Phil’s House,” 81 Ball Lane, Durango Tickets: $15 For Mor Info: www.facebook.com/theatreofthewild by struggling to the top of something craggy? Lucky them, but what else is new?

Here’s something new: a live theater production that features climbers, not sponsored by Black Diamond or North Face, reveling in the adventure of the personal.

“Why do you want to climb this mountain?”

Largent roars, drill sergeant-style, into each climber’s face in the opening scene for the troupe’s new production, “Lobuje.”

“To tell a mountain climber story that doesn’t end with James Franco under a rock, sir!”

It’s true that when we watch movies or read the titan’s tales, we get jazzed, eager to run out and start

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conquering mountains or slaying dragons. But sometimes people just feel like these tales are more demoralizing than inspiring. We can’t relate. Sure, they make us dream big. We spend every spare moment at the crag and lots of moolah on gear. Yet, at some point, we realize we’re just not going to be the next Honnold or Tommy Caldwell.

Which isn’t to say it’s not worth trying. It’s just that most of us just don’t have the time and money to sustain the lifestyle necessary to hold on till Arc’teryx looks our way. Personally, every time I’ve approached breaking the V3/V4 barrier, I’ve either broken a bone, had to work more or gotten pregnant. Life gets in the way. With the current philosophical emphasis being “go big or go home,” it’s hard to rally for adventures that seem, on the surface, nothing to write home about.

Undoing that mindset is one of the goals of Theatre of the Wild’s “Lobuje.” Their message: You do you, and to heck with bragging rights. They want to remind us that it’s not about what we get to the top of, or how many miles we walk, run, paddle or crawl. It’s that we’re showing up, for ourselves, in whatever way4

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that manifests for us at the time, regardless of whether anyone else will be impressed.

The four troupe members (Largent, Sarah Grizzard, Theo Reitswiesner and Gustavo Palma) are no strangers to obstacles.

Each of them worked long hours or several jobs at once to make “Lobuje” happen.

When hoops popped up, they hopped through them. And they believe we can all do a little more ourselves if we’re willing to jump, too. “We want people to ask themselves: What’s their version of their stories?

What do they want to do? Not talk about, not daydream, not read about, but do?” says Largent.

Last July, the Durango-based troupe debuted their theatrical docu-comedy at the Fort Collins Fringe Festival (earning a People’s Choice Award). The first ever recorded play documenting a mountain climb, “Lobuje” follows a motley crew of performers as they attempt to summit the 20,000-foot Himalayan Peak of the same name.

As the group takes us on their true, very relatable 2018 journey, they reveal the unique, the tragic and the quirky in each of their personal stories. With raw honesty and courage, they give the audience full exposure to what drives each of them to subject themselves to the kind of life-anddeath tests that await. While “Lobuje” isn’t one of the highest peaks in the world, it’s still a big, freaking craggy mountain covered in ice with the hiking starting at around 15,000 feet – 7,000 feet above the danger line for altitude sickness (which Largent got and nearly succumbed to, by the way.)

And “by the way” is how that part of the

story is told, not as the focus, but merely as an aside of an adventure that is sometimes frightening, sometimes funny. Three of the climbers actually start the long trek with a martini hangover, which they had to endure while navigating foreign systems and technological quirks.

While it’s true their climb lacks all of the traditional juice that fuels most mountainclimbing tales (loss of life, limb or marriage), what they bring to the table is an action comedy that strives for deeper waters. In the process, it gives the audience a human version of the typical climbing experience: a mountain climbing story about and to inspire everyman/woman.

“We’re not really here to say you could be the next professional athlete,” said Largent. “We’re here to say that that doesn’t matter. You can do more, you can get out there in whatever way that means for you, and it’s worth it. You’ll grow. It’ll make you a better person, and that will benefit the whole world.”

That message comes through loud and clear, in large part because it’s being conveyed to you not only by the people who actually made the climb, but by a group of talented actors who are as passionate about performance art as they are adventure.

Largent, who also serves as artistic director and lead writer, taught theater at Arizona State University and Fort Lewis College. He holds an MFA in performance from Arizona State, which specializes in developing new work and might be where he perfected some of his incredible facial expressions. He uses these masterfully in each of the several roles he plays in the performance. As a mat-

From left, Gustavo Palma, Sarah Grizzard, Theo Reitswiesner and Mike Largent, in a scene from “Lobuje.” The play takes a humorous look at the human side of adventures, big and small./Courtesy photo ter of fact, all the actors wear many hats, an inside joke you’ll get when you see the play.

Watching the characters “transform” so completely and convincingly is one of this play’s marvels.

And where would you see this kind of play? Why outside, of course! The theatrical

telegraph

play is styled for outdoor performance on a truck/stage custom built by the troupe. The fold out stage features a retractable climbing wall that simulates their climb to the peak.

And here’s the thing, it’s all so convincing that you actually believe you are there.

Could Alex Honnold do that? n

Sept. 12, 2019 n 15

FlashinthePan

More than a beer sponge

by Ari LeVaux

H

ot peppers and cheese are a winning combination.

Whether it’s red flakes on a slice of pizza, a spicy tray of cheese-drenched nachos or a serving of ema datshi (a Himalayan dish of hot chile and molten cheese), the action is the same: The fat in the cheese embraces the violence of the capsaicin, absorbing the heat with its creaminess. Even in meals where the heat level doesn’t warrant protection, the pungent flavor of chile remains a perfect match for a rich bite of cheese.

Today we dive deep into another example of a happy marriage between chile and cheese: the jalapeño popper.

It sounds cliché, but many people meet their first jalapeño poppers in a bar, and that is nothing to be ashamed of. Although “bar food” is too often a euphemism for pre-prepared, cheap, frozen and resuscitated with microwaves or boiling oil, the conceptual bones of a jalapeño popper are solid. Given half a chance, a jalapeño popper could aspire to greater things than beer absorption.

The potential for greatness starts with the fleshy, versatile jalapeño itself. Even raw, it has the musk of a roasted green chile and the enhanced flavor that comes with it.

I stuff my roasted jalapeños with cheese and roast again, and when advisable (see below), I wrap the whole thing with bacon. These days, there are all kinds of jalapeños available, including large ones great for stuffing. Some are mild, like the Senorita, which is a great option for spiceaverse pepper lovers. At the other end of the spectrum, the

hottest jalapeño can slay even the most heat tolerant.

The jalapeño popper is a thinly veiled, Tex-Mex version of a chile relleno, in which a large roasted chile is stuffed with cheese and fried in egg batter. A popper, meanwhile, is stuffed raw, unroasted. The packed popper, breaded and deep-fried, lacks the flavor of roasted chile.

But roasting takes time, as anyone knows who has attempted to roast chile at home. And one of the most tedious parts of the process is the constant turning of the peppers, so all surfaces are evenly blistered.

Luckily, a toaster oven can roast two sides of a chile pod at once, cutting the labor in half.

One turn, at most, is all it takes, and the home chef can effortlessly roast five to 10 chiles at once.

A roasted jalapeño, like any roasted green chile, will collapse into a 2D version of its uncooked self.

But if you stuff it carefully it will plump out again like a Botox injection.

Mexican-style queso fresco is the best stuffer, because it stays stiff even when melted and won’t seep out and become a burnt puddle around your chile. The flavor does what you want cheese to do, without grabbing the spotlight. Salty, creamy and soft, it’s exactly what you want inside a roasted green jalapeño. Caribbean-style queso blanco works great too, but can be harder to find, so I searched for something with which to hold it all together. Alas, sometimes the peppers break as you stuff them. Wishing for some kind of food-grade duct tape, I happened upon a thin slice of bacon as the obvious solution.

Be advised, it’s a popular beer food for a reason, if used that way – a dangerous feedback loop can develop, espe-

Are you having difficulty:

cially if the jalapeños are spicy. You drink some cold beer to quench the flames, but it also dulls your nerves. And it tastes so good with the popper you want to drink more.

And as soon as the pain subsides you want to eat more, and around and around we go.

After a night like that, the morning walk of shame will be back and forth to the bathroom.

So if the enchantments of these cheesy, greasy green spice bombs get your mouth into trouble, we recommend a glass of milk instead.

Jalapeños Rellenos Serves 6 12 large jalapeños 1 10-oz block of queso fresco, or farmer style cheese, cut into 2-inch spears 12 strips of thin-sliced bacon (or vegan version) 1 fresh lime 3 tablespoons soy sauce Protective gloves Wearing gloves if so desired, place chiles in the center of a toaster oven, far enough apart that they don’t touch one another. Set it to toast, and toast as many times, or for as long as necessary – about 15 minutes – such that the peels begin to blister. Turn each pepper 90 degrees, and toast again until the up and down sides are again blistered, about another 15 minutes. Place the roasted chile into a covered container for 20 minutes to cool and “sweat,” a process that loosens the skins. After they cool, carefully peel the skins.

Slice halfway through the stem end of the pepper, enough to pull back a still-attached cap and scoop out the seeds and spicy membranes inside. Rinse the cleaned pods if you’re afraid of spice.

Gently stuff about two spears into each jalapeño and fold the caps back into position. If you wish, or deem it necessary, wrap some or all jalapeños in a slice of bacon each. Around and around, tightly.

Place the stuffed, wrapped jalapeños on the toaster oven tray. Roast, without turning for about 15 minutes, or until bacon is crispy. Make sure they cool completely before eating. Season with soy sauce and lime. n

AUTUMN

2019

managing insurance costs? with a new diagnosis? with mental or chronic illness?

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TopShelf

Blues, brews and a Native metal band or two

by Chris Aaland

ings within this German style from Left Hand, Sam Adams, Sierra Nevada, AleSmith, Enegren, JosephsBrau (yes, the house brand at estival season in Southwest Colorado all but comes to a close Trader Joe’s), Ska & the venerable Ayinger Oktober Fest-Marzen this weekend when the 26th annual Telluride Blues & were all sampled & ranked. Our local lads took home top honors in Brews rolls out the barrels in Town Park. If you don’t have the blind panel tasting, the judges noted that Ska’s Oktoberfest tickets yet, be prepared to pay scalper’s prices. This one’s been easily won and cited its aroma (spiced orange peel, freshly baked sold out for months. rustic bread and powerful lemon), mouthfeel (“silky with high carAs always, Gumby booked a legendary lineup for 2019, with bonation & some coating oiliness around the palate”), balance (the John Fogerty (8 p.m. Friday), Boz Scaggs (8 p.m. Saturday) and best of the lot) as winning characteristics. “The Ska was almost George Clinton & Parliaelixir-like with its combinament Funkadelic (7 p.m. tion of herbs, citrus peel Sunday) headlining the and rustic grains. This is three-day affair. The unthe beer I would request by dercard ain’t too shabby, the liter mug in Munich,” either. Regulars like Anders noted one taster.

Osborne, Tab Benoit, Jarabe Mexicano reSamantha Fish, Cedric turns to the Community Burnside, the Reverend Concert Hall at 7:30 p.m.

Peyton’s Big Damn Band, Monday with a new show Otis Taylor and Mitch featuring Ballet Folklorico Woods are all back, putde Los Angeles. Jarabe ting the blues squarely in Mexicano, veterans of past the middle of Blues & performances at both the Brews. Americana and altCommunity Concert Hall country fans even have and KSUT’s Party in the something to look forward Park, honors the past too, with Ryan Bingham, while embracing the fuHiss Golden Messenger ture by incorporating its and Phil Cook on the bill. members’ unique mixture The grand tasting, Jarabe Mexicano returns to the Concert Hall at 7:30 p.m. Monday with a (“jarabe”) of traditional which takes place from new show featuring Ballet Folklorico de Los Angeles. and contemporary Latin noon ‘til 3, is full-contact genres. Most of the band’s festivation. Fifty-six breweries will pour over 170 styles of beer members have grown up living, studying and working on both and ciders to thousands of thirsty fans. Durango will be represides of the border – which provided them with an intimate unsented by Carver’s, Ska and Steamworks, with other regional and derstanding of the trans-border demands and challenges facing national favorites. The best part of the grand tasting? The beer is millions who live cross-cultural lives. Ballet Folklorico is a young free! Music still happens during this three-hour orgy of hops and dance company that, despite being formed in 2011, has already malts, with International Blues Challenge winner Ms. Hy-C & distinguished themselves as one of the nation’s premier Mexican Fresh Start (noon), Otis Taylor’s Psychedelic Banjo Posse (1:20 folk dance companies. They’ll perform “Cruzando Fronteras,” p.m.) and Phil Cook (2:40 p.m.) rocking a binge-worthy soundwhich translates into “Border Crossings” for gringos like me. track to your suds sampling.

CV Wells & Jeroen van Tyn will perform a fundraiser for the Of course, beers will be available for purchase the rest of the Durango Autumn Arts Festival at 7 p.m. Saturday at the Durango weekend. Sierra Nevada once again sponsors and will offer a host of Arts Center. The duo crosses multiple genres from contemporary wares, including Hazy Little Thing IPA and its old standby Pale Ale. folk to musical theatre to Gypsy with narrative songwriting that Ska’s Mexican Logger, Telluride’s Mountain Beer Kolsch, Avery’s tells stories ranging from unexpected love to accidental murder to White Rascal Belgium Style Wit, Bonfire’s Apres-cot Apricot Blonde the secret life of senior citizens. Wells is a self-taught singer/songAle and a pair of Big B hard ciders are also available by pint. writer/guitarist, while van Tyn is a classically trained violinist and Something relatively new is the High Altitude Craft Beer vocalist. The DAC lends itself to their theatrical performance, Lounge, powered by Colorado Yurt Co. There’s a rotating selecwhich includes costumes like tutus and feather boas. tion of rare Sierra Nevada offerings tapped, allowing you to drink Six hard rock, metal, punk and alternative bands will perform inside yurts in comfy camp chairs from Kelty. the Native REZ-olution Rock the Youth concert at 4 p.m.

A new highlight is Blues for Breakfast at 9 a.m. Saturday and Saturday at the ELHI Community Center in Ignacio. Such New Sunday at the brand-new Back Porch Stage. Cozy couches and a Mexico bands as Illegal Aliens (punk from Santa Fe), Fatal Corrustic décor, not to mention a complete breakfast spread and ruption (metal from Gallup), Eye (metal from Albuquerque), cocktails (for purchase), give you a chance to kill last night’s Shadow Remain (hard rock from Thoreau), Park Ave. (alternative hangover with the hair of the dog and some tasty treats. rock from Shiprock) and Tu$ken (metal from Farmington) will Ska hosts its Euphoria Pale Ale release party at 5 p.m. perform. This free outdoor concert promotes a drug and alcoholtonight (Thurs., Sept. 12) at the World Headquarters. Ska’s unique free environment for youths in Ignacio and on the Southern Ute rotation of Mexican Logger in the spring and summer and EuReservation. It’s held as part of the Southern Ute Tribal Fair. A phoria in the fall and winter is still something I can’t wrap my jalapeño eating contest precedes the event at 2 p.m. head around – quite frankly, they’re two of my favorite Ska beers.

Finally, the San Juan Symphony kicks off its 34th season I typically stock up with a case of each just before the other is rewith a garden party from 4-6 p.m. Sunday in the Rochester leased, to get me through the lean months without. For the Hotel’s Secret Garden. Meet musical director Thomas Heuser and record, Euphoria’s my favorite of the two. For the life of me, I’m enjoy music by members of the SJS and SJS Youth Symphony. Doshocked there aren’t more Euphoriaheads out there. nations will be accepted.

And speaking of Ska, a reviewer for The Full Pint Craft Beer News Roll out the barrel, we’ve got the blues on the run? Email me at recently did a blind taste test of eight different Oktoberfests. Offerchrisa@gobrainstorm.net. n

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onthetown

Thursday12 “Exploring Innovative & Fire-Retardant-Treated Local Building Materials,” workshop hosted by Timber Age Systems and the Colorado State Forestry Service, 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m., Durango Public Library. Register at info@timberagesystems.com.

Friday13

Baby Meetup with Durango Café au Play, 9:30-11:30 a.m., 2307 Columbine. 749-9607.

BID Coffee & Conversation, 8:30-9:30 a.m., TBK Bank, 259 W. 9th St.

Drop-in Tennis, 4 p.m., Durango High School, 2390 Main Ave. Thursday Afternoon Social Club for veterans, their spouses and supporters, 4-6 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main Ave. Jason Thies performs, 4-8 p.m., Doubletree Hotel, 501 Camino del Rio. Trailwork with Trails 2000, 4:30-7:30 p.m., SkyRaider Trail. www.trails2000.org.

Fruit Glean Happy Hour, hosted by Good Food Collective, 5-7 p.m., meet outside Smiley Building, 1309 E. 3rd Ave. info@goodfoodcollective.org.

The Ben Gibson Band performs, 5-8 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St.

Submit “On the Town” items by Monday at noon to: calendar@durangotelegraph.com

Plursday featuring live music, 9 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Sue Keller performs, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. Sitting Meditation, 5:30-6:15 p.m., Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E. 3rd Ave. Open Mic Night, 6 p.m., Eno Wine Bar, 723 E. 2nd Ave. Breastfeeding workshop for expectant parents, 6-8 p.m., Kids Rock, 563 Main Ave. Trivia Night, 6:30-8:30 p.m., Powerhouse Science Center, 1333 Camino del Rio. www.powsci.org.

Gary B. Walker performs, 6:30-8:30 p.m., Jean-Pierre Restaurant & Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave. Matt Rupnow performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave. A living history portrait of Nikola Tesla, presented by Colorado Humanities and History Live, 7 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 E. 2nd Ave. Open Mic & Stand-Up, 8 p.m., El Rancho Tavern, 975 Main Ave. Karaoke, 8 p.m., Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave.

“By Any Memes Necessary,” game night fundraiser for KSJD Radio and The Sunflower Theatre, 7 p.m., Sunflower Theatre in Cortez. www.sunflowertheatre.org.

Karaoke, 7 p.m.-close, VFW, 1550 Main Ave.

Durango Early Bird Toastmasters, 7-8:30 a.m., LPEA, 45 Stewart St. 769-7615.

Free yoga, 8:30-9:30 a.m., Lively Boutique, 809 Main .

Zumba Gold, 9:30-10:15 a.m., La Plata Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave. Meet Inventor Nikola Tesla, history comes alive with Doug Mishler, 11 a.m.-noon, Durango Public Library.

STEAM Lab: Stay Afloat, 3:30-4:30 p.m., Durango Public Library.

Free Legal Clinic, 4-5 p.m., Ignacio Community Library. 563-9287.

Spanish Speaking Parents & Littles Fridays, 4-6 p.m., Durango Café au Play, 1309 E. 3rd Ave., Room 201. durangocafeauplay.org.

Ignacio Farmers & Artisans Market, 4-8 p.m., Fridays thru Oct. 4, ELHI Community Center in Ignacio. 5634600.

The Assortment performs, 5-9 p.m., Macho’s North, 1485 Florida Road.

Sue Keller performs, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. Friday Nights at Fox Fire, featuring music from The Lisa Blue Band, 6-9 p.m., Fox Fire Farms in Ignacio. foxfirefarms.com.

Live music, 6-9 p.m., DJ Hakan, 9 p.m.-close, Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave. Four Corners Guides Launch Party & Doom Art Show, 6:30 p.m., Pine Needle Dry Goods, 858 Main Ave. Disco Night, 6:30-9 p.m., Chapman Hill Skating Rink.

375-7395.

Robby Overfield performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave. 5K Glow Fun Run and 1K Walk, to take back the night and stand up against sexual violence, 7 p.m., Student Union Plaza at Fort Lewis College. www.fortlewis.edu/care.

Raven Narratives “Dirty Work” Storytelling SLAM, 7:30-9:30 p.m., James Ranch. www.ravennarra tives.org.

Saturday14 Walk to End Alzheimer’s, featuring BBQ, games, face painting and more, registration, 8 a.m., walk begins, 9 a.m., Cortez City Park.

Durango Farmers Market, featuring live music from Hal & Mel, 8 a.m.-noon, TBK Bank parking lot, W. 8th Street. www.durangofarmersmarket.com.

Chili Chase 10K Trail Run and Chili Cook-off, benefit for the San Juan Mountains Association. Registration 8:30 a.m.; race start 9 a.m.; chili time 11 a.m. Backcountry Experience, 1205 Camino del Rio. www.crowdrise.com/run-for-the-mountains.

Drop-in Tennis, 9 a.m., Durango High, 2390 Main.

Henry Stoy performs, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-Pierre Restaurant & Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave. VFW Indoor Flea Market, 10 a.m.-4 p.m., 1550 Main Ave. 247-0384.

Sensory Storytime, for children on the autism spectrum and families, 10:30-11:30 a.m., Durango Library.

5th annual Zucchini Extravaganza, noon-2 p.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield.

Community BBQ Picnic Potluck, burgers and brats provided, bring a side dish to share and apples for pressing, 12:30 -3:30 p.m., Animas Valley Grange, 7271 County Road 203.

The Assortment performs, 4-8 p.m., Doubletree Hotel, 501 Camino del Rio. The Pete Giuliani Band performs, 5-9 p.m., Garage Billiards and Music Hall, 121 W. 8th St. Sue Keller performs, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. “Blackbeard’s Sunken Prize: Excavation & Analysis of the pirate’s Flagship, the Queen Anne’s Revenge,” part of the 3rd annual SJ Basin Archaeological Society’s lecture. Reception 6:30 p.m., lecture 7 p.m., Student Union Ballroom at Fort Lewis. 247-7657.4

Free Divorce and Custody Clinic Presented by Colorado Legal Services

Tuesday, Sept. 17th, 5:30 - 7 p.m.

Durango Public Library For more information, call: 970-247-0266

18 n Sept. 12, 2019

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Raven Narratives “Dirty Work” Storytelling SLAM, 6:30-9:30 p.m., Road X Werx near Cortez. www.ravennarra tives.org.

Uncovering the life and times of Blackbeard the pirate What: “Blackbeard’s Sunken Prize: Excavation and Analysis of the Pirate’s Flagship, the Queen Anne’s Revenge,” presented by the San Juan Basin Archaeological Society and FLC Anthropology Department When: 7 p.m., Sat., Sept. 14 Where: FLC Student Union Ballroom Tickets:$13 advance at Durango Welcome Center or www.durangocon certs.com; $15 at door Blackbeard the pirate was the most feared man on the high seas of the New World, looting and pillaging countless ships up and down the Atlantic seaboard and in the Caribbean in the early 1700s.

But what about Blackbeard the man, aka Captain Edward Thatch?

Thanks to the recent recovery of Blackbeard’s flagship, Queen Anne’s Revenge, off the coast of North Carolina, we can all get a better glimpse of the man, the myth, the legend.

To bring the story home, Linda Carnes-McNaughton, coauthor of Blackbeard’s Sunken Prize: Excavation and Analysis of the Pirate’s Flagship, the Queen Anne’s Revenge, will be in Durango this Saturday. Archaeologist and curator at Fort Bragg’s Cultural Resources Management Program, CarnesMcNaughton played a leading role in preserving and interpreting artifacts recovered from the shipwreck. She co-wrote the book with Mark Wilde-Ramsing, the now-retired North Carolina deputy archaeologist who directed the efforts to recover the QAR.

Andrew Schuhmann performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave. Jim Belcher Duo performs, 7 p.m., Seven Rivers Restaurant at Sky Ute Casino Resort in Ignacio.

Wells & van Tyn perform, benefit show for the Durango Autumn Arts Festival, 7-9 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 E. 2nd Ave. Comedy Cocktail Open Mic Stand Up, 8 p.m., Eno Wine Bar, 723 E. 2nd Ave. DJ Side Affex, 9 p.m.-close, Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Sunday15 Durango Flea Market, 8:30 a.m., La Plata County Fairgrounds.

Veterans Breakfast, 9-11 a.m., Elks Club, 901 E. 2nd Ave. 946-4831.

Henry Stoy, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-Pierre Restaurant & Wine Bar, 601 Main Ave. Traditional Irish Music Jam, 12:30-4 p.m., Irish Embassy, 900 Main Ave. Writers’ Workshop, 2 p.m., Ignacio Community Library.

“We have this expression related to the overall importance of Queen Anne’s Revenge: ‘This is not just a shipwreck, but a pirate’s shipwreck, and not just any pirate, but Blackbeard’s shipwreck,’” Carnes-McNaughton has said.

Saturday’s lecture will include a brief introduction to Blackbeard (1680-1718) and what research has revealed about the Englishman’s private life, family and operations. The lecture will also discuss the discovery and recovery of Queen Anne’s Revenge as well as items recovered so far (some of which might make you squirm).

The ship, which ran aground – some believe intentionally – on an unmarked sand bar near the Beaufort Inlet, was discovered in 1996 by a salvage company. A former French slave ship, it was commandeered by Blackbeard and renamed the Queen Anne’s Revenge. Alas, Blackbeard and a few comrades reportedly took all the loot, estimated at hundreds of thousands in today’s dollars, instead leaving behind a treasure trove of artifacts.

To learn more about those artifacts and Blackbeard’s life (and death), walk the plank to the FLC ballroom this Saturday. A limited number of copies of Blackbeard’s Sunken Prize will be available for purchase. Five dollars from each ticket will support FLC student internships at the Center of Southwest Studies and scholarships for FLC’s summer archaeology field school. Admission is free to the first 40 high school or college students with proper ID.

Blue Moon Ramblers, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. Joel Racheff performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Monday16 Yoga Storytime, 9:30-10:45 a.m., Smiley Building Studio 10, 1309 E. 3rd Ave.

15th annual Fiesta on the Mesa, celebration of National Hispanic Heritage Month with authentic food, folkloric dances, live music and more, 5:30-7:30 p.m., Student Union Outdoor Plaza at Fort Lewis College. www.fortlewis.edu/el centro.

Classic Movie Mondays, featuring “The Defiant Ones,” 6 p.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield.

Watch Your Step class, 10:15 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Rob Webster performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main.

Trivia Night, 7 p.m., Blondies in Cortez.

Terry Hartzel performs, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave. Community Cycle Rides, free and open to all levels and abilities, hosted by Adaptive Sports Association, 5:30 p.m., meet at La Plata County Fairgrounds northeast parking area.

259-0374 or program@asadurango.com.

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Jarabe Mexicano performs featuring Ballet Folklorico del Los Angeles, 7:30 p.m., Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College. www.durangoconcerts.com.

Contiki Party with the Aussies, 9 p.m.-close, Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

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Tuesday17 Zumba Gold, 9:30-10:15 a.m., La Plata Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave. Technology and Scams: Staying Safe on the Internet, 1:30-3 p.m., Durango Public Library.

Drop-in Tennis, 4 p.m., Durango High, 2390 Main.

Goinomadic performs, 5-8 p.m., event also runs Sept.

24, Chainless Brewing, 3000 Main Ave. Matt Rupnow performs, 5 p.m.-close, event runs each Tuesday, Pura Vida, 160 E. 12th St. Terry Hartzel performs, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

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Sept. 12, 2019 n 19

AskRachel Interesting fact: People like to blame Millennials for the demise of everything, but in my experience, boomers and X-ers are somehow way worse about both a) not leaving voicemails, and b) not leaving voicemails less than 3 minutes long.

Dear Rachel, My mother – who just learned what Youtube is in the last year – has started sending me videos from some show called “Impractical Jokers.” I was prepared for something completely stupid and inane. And I was right. Yet, I also cannot stop watching these clips. They feed from one into the next, and suddenly, I haven’t shaved in a week and I’m not even sure I’ve fed my cat.

Help me break the cycle!

– Caught in the New Boob Tube Dear Punked, In the name of research, I pulled up some of these clips. And I almost didn’t make my deadline because of it. My own mother refuses to participate in pranks because she feels bad for other people. I think it’s called “empathy?” But now, this show is giving me some brilliant ideas for the next time I have to suffer through a family gathering. Even if I can’t pull off any of the pranks, I can go sit in the bathroom and watch them until it’s time to go home.

– Pull my finger, Rachel Dear Rachel, I recently had to file some documents at the county courthouse. While I was in there, the chile I had for lunch caught up with me, and by

OntheTown from p. 19

Rotary Club of Durango meets, presentation from State Senator Don Coram, 6 p.m., Henry Strater Hotel, 699 Main Ave. 385-7899.

Trivia Factory, hosted by Ben Bernstein, 6:30-8:30 p.m., The Roost, 128 E. College Dr.

DJ Crazy Charlie, 6:30-10:30 p.m., Billy Goat Saloon, Gem Village.

Tim Sullivan performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Latin Dance Nights, 8 p.m., Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave. salsadancedurango@gmail.com.

Open Mic Night, 8 p.m.-close, Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Wednesday18

Trailwork with Trails 2000, 9 a.m.-2 p.m., Spurline Trails at Three Springs. www.trails2000.org.

the time I filed those documents (if you know what I mean), my meter had run out and I got a ticket. Now I don’t think I’m the exception to the rule … but I feel like they should make an exception for these, um, extenuating circumstances. Any advice for my ticket appeal?

– Burne Dear Montezuma’s Revenge, Documentation is key. Do you have a receipt from the chile establishment, including a timestamp? A photograph of the meter when you fed it and court records demonstrating the time of your filing? Nose-witness reports of your extenuating circumstances? If you can assemble an ironclad case, you probably won’t get out of the ticket, but you’ll make someone’s day. Or, you could just ask for a warning.

– Caught with my pants down, Rachel Dear Rachel, I’m completely lost on modern cell phone etiquette. It’s rare enough for someone to actually dial a number and make a phone call. But when someone does call me, they never leave a voicemail. Instead, they send a follow-up text that says “Call me.” That tells me nothing! I have no idea what kind of trap I’m walking into. You already reached my voicemail, so is it that hard to just tell me what you wanted?

- Phoning It In Dear Voice Activated, The real issue is that no one wants to answer the phone these days. You get a text message because the

Pub Quiz, 6:30 p.m., Irish Embassy Pub, 900 Main Ave. 403-1200.

Terry Rickard performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave. Open Mic Night, 7:30 p.m., The Roost, 128 E. College

Karaoke, 8 p.m., Blondies in Cortez.

Karaoke with Crazy Charlie, 8 p.m.-close, Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave.

Ongoing “Dynamic Disequalibrium,” works by Tim Hamza and Paul Pennington, exhibit runs thru September, Animas Chocolate Co., 920 Main Ave. “Timeless West,” paintings from Jim Rey and sculpture from Star Liana York, thru Oct. 4, Sorrel Sky Gallery, 828 Main Ave. www.sorrelsky.com.

“Inside Out: Visions from the Artist’s Mind,” thru April 2020, Southern Ute Museum, 503 Ouray Dr. www.southernutemuseum.org.

Terry Hartzel performs, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

Upcoming

20 n Sept. 12, 2019

“Mesa Verde Soundscapes” featuring Jill Haley, 7 p.m., Sept. 20, Sunflower Theatre in Cortez. www.sunflow ertheatre.org.

Steamers and Dreamers Steampunk Convention, presented by Aztec Vintage Social, 10 a.m.-11 p.m., Sept.

21, Minium Park, Aztec. 505-801-0373.

“Timeless West,” paintings from Jim Rey and sculpture from Star Liana York, artist reception, 5-7 p.m., Sept. 20, during Fall Gallery Walk, Sorrel Sky Gallery, 828 Main Ave. www.sorrelsky.com.

John Wesley Powell: Scientist, Poet & Botched Politician, free lecture with Greg Hobbs, 5:30 p.m.

Student Union Ballroom at Fort Lewis College. 247-7456.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., Thur-Sun, 8 Ave. Tavern, 509 E 8 Ave.

Loki Moon – Raw Experiments, 6-8 p.m., Eno Wine Bar, 723 E. 2nd Ave.

caller knows you saw the call (seriously, who doesn’t have their phone on them anymore?) and chose not to answer. The real tragedy is the death of the phone call prank. No more letting Prince Albert out of the can, or catching the refrigerator that’s running. Hours of “Impractical Jokers,” and I’ve yet to see a crank call. What’s become of us?

– Dismiss call, Rachel

Dr.

Kennebec Market, featuring local farms, baked goods, handmade products and more, 2-6 p.m., each Wednesday, Kennebec Café in Hesperus. 759-7345.

Thank the Veterans potluck, 5:30 p.m., Peter Neds performs, 7-8:30 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main Ave. 828-7777.

Email Rachel at telegraph@durangotelegraph.com

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Laugh Therapy Stand-Up Comedy Open Mic, signup 7 p.m., event begins 8 p.m., Irish Embassy, 900 Main Ave. Eminence Ensemble performs with Pherkad, 9 p.m., Sept. 19, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. www.ani mascitytheatre.com.

telegraph

Eminence Ensemble, part of the Silverton Summer Sounds series 6 p.m., Sept. 20, Columbine Park, Silverton. www.silvertonconcerts.com.

23rd annual Durango Autumn Arts Festival, Sept.

21-22, along E. 2nd Avenue in Durango. www.durangoarts.org.

Deadline for “On the Town” submissions is Monday at noon.

To submit an item email: calendar@durango telegraph.com

FreeWillAstrology

by Rob Brezsny ARIES (March 21-April 19): Hi, I’m your sales representative for UnTherapy, a free program designed to provide healing strategies for people who are trying too hard. Forgive me for being blunt, but I think you could benefit from our services. I don’t have space here to reveal all the secrets of UnTherapy, but here’s an essential hint: every now and then the smartest way to outwit a problem is to stop worrying, let it alone and allow it to solve itself.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): People in Northeast India weave long, strong suspension bridges out of the living roots of fig trees. The structures can measure up to 150 feet and bear the weight of hundreds of people. In accordance with astrological omens, let’s make these marvels your metaphors of power for the coming weeks. To stimulate your meditations, ask yourself the following questions. 1. How can you harness nature to help you to get where you need to go?

2. How might you transform instinctual energy so that it better serves your practical needs? 3. How could you channel wildness so that it becomes eminently useful to you?

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): If you climb to the top of Mount Everest, you’re standing on land that was once on the floor of a shallow tropical sea. Four-hundred-million-year-old fossils of marine life still abide there in the rock.

Over the course of eons, through the magic of plate tectonics, that low flat land got folded and pushed upwards more than 5 miles. I suspect you Geminis will have the power to accomplish a less spectacular but still amazing transformation during the next 10 months. To get started, identify what you would like that transformation to be.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In 1996, when Gary Kasparov was rated the world’s best chess player, he engaged in a series of matches with a chessplaying computer named Deep Blue. Early on in the first game, Deep Blue tried a move that confused Kasparov. Rattled, he began to wonder if the machine was smarter than him. Ultimately, his play suffered and he lost the game. Later it was revealed that Deep Blue’s puzzling move was the result of a bug in its code. I’ll encourage you to cultivate a benevolent bug in your own code during the coming weeks, Cancerian. I bet it will be the key to you scoring a tricky victory.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): American hero Harriet Tubman escaped slavery as a young woman. She ran away from the wealthy “master”

who claimed to “own” her, and reached sanctuary. But rather than simply enjoy her freedom, she dedicated herself to liberating other slaves. Nineteen times she returned to enemy territory and risked her life, ultimately leading 300 people out of hellish captivity. Later she served as a scout, spy and nurse in the Union Army during the Civil War, where her actions saved another 700 people. In 1874, the U.S. Congress considered but then ultimately rejected a bill to pay her $2,000 for her numerous courageous acts. Don’t you dare be like Congress in the coming weeks, Leo. It’s crucial that you give tangible acknowledgment and practical rewards to those who have helped, guided and supported you.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Novelist Wallace Stegner wrote, “Some are born in their place, some find it, some realize after long searching that the place they left is the one they have been searching for.” I hope that in the last nine months, Virgo, you have resolved which of those three options is true for you. I also trust that you have been taking the necessary actions to claim and own that special place – to acknowledge it and treasure it as the power spot where you feel most at home in the world. If you have not yet fully finished what I’m describing here, do it now.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Earth’s species are going extinct at a rate unmatched since the dinosaurs died out 65 million years ago. Among the creatures on the verge of being lost forever are birds like the cryptic treehunter and spix’s macaw, as well as the northern white rhino and the vaquita, a type of porpoise. So why don’t we clone the last few individuals of those beleaguered species?

Here are the answers. 1. Cloned animals typically aren’t healthy. 2. A species needs a sizable population to retain genetic diversity; a few individuals aren’t sufficient.

3. Humans have decimated the homes of the threatened species, making it hard for them to thrive. Conclusion: Cloning is an inadequate stopgap action. Is there a better way to address the problem? Yes: by preserving the habitats of wild creatures.

Inspired by this principle, Libra, I ask you to avoid trying halfway fixes for the dilemmas in your personal sphere. Summon full measures that can really work.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Though patched together and incomplete, the 2,200-yearold marble sculpture known as the Winged Victory of Samothrace is prominently displayed at Paris’ Louvre Museum. It’s a glorious depiction of Nike, the winged goddess of victory, and is regarded as one of ancient Greece’s great masterpieces. For hundreds of years it was missing. Then in 1863, an archaeologist discovered it, although it was broken into more than a hundred

pieces. Eventually, it was rebuilt, and much of its beauty was resurrected. I see the coming weeks as a time when you, too, could recover the fragments of an old treasure and begin reassembling it to make a pretty good restoration.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22Dec. 21): “I’ve learned that I must find positive outlets for anger or it will destroy me,” actor Sidney Poitier said. That can be a dynamic meditation for you during the next three weeks. I think you will derive substantial power from putting it into action. If you’re ingenious and diligent about finding those positive outlets, your anger will generate constructive and transformative results.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): In 1905, at the age of 30, Lucy Maud Montgomery wrote the novel Anne of Green Gables. It was a tale about an orphan girl growing up on Prince Edward Island. She sent the manuscript to several publishers, all of whom rejected it. Discouraged, she put it away in a hatbox and stored it in a closet. But two years later, her ambitions reignited when she re-read the story. Again she mailed it to prospective publishers, and this time one liked it enough to turn it into a book. It soon became a bestseller. Since then it has sold over 50 million copies and been translated into 36 languages. I figure you Capricorns are at a point in your own unfolding that’s equivalent to where Anne was shortly before she rediscovered the manuscript she’d put away in the hatbox.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The Toxorhynchites are species of large mosquitoes that don’t buzz around our heads while we’re trying to sleep and will never bite our skin or suck our blood. In fact, they’re our benefactors.

Their larvae feast on the larvae of the mosquitoes that are bothersome to us. In accordance with astrological omens, I propose that you be alert for a metaphorically comparable influence in your own life: a helper or ally that might be in disguise or may just superficially seem to be like an adversary.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Audre Lord identified herself as a black writer, lesbian, librarian, mother, feminist, civil rights activist and many other descriptors. But as ardent as she was in working for the political causes she was passionate about, she didn’t want to be pigeonholed in a single identity. One of her central teachings was to celebrate all the different parts of herself. “Only by learning to live in harmony with your contradictions can you keep it all afloat,” she testified. These approaches should be especially fun and extra meaningful for you in the coming weeks, Pisces. I encourage you to throw a big Unity Party for all the different people you are.

telegraph

Sept. 12, 2019 n 21

classifieds

Deadline for Telegraph classified ads is Tuesday at noon.

Ads are a bargain at 10 cents a character with a $5 minimum. Even better, ads can now be placed online: durangotelegraph.com. Prepayment is required via cash, credit card or check.

(Sorry, no refunds or substitutions.)

Ads can be submitted via: n classifieds@durango telegraph.com n 970-259-0133 n 777 Main Ave., #214 Approximate office hours: Mon., 9ish - 5ish Tues., 9ish - 5ish Wed., 9ish - 3ish Thurs., On delivery Fri., 10:30ish - 2ish please call ahead: 259-0133.

https://yogadurango.com/events/yoga-forchronic-pain/. For details call Lynn: 7995829.

Learning Center’s scholarship program!

Saturday 9/14 8:00 - 1:00pm! 890 E 3rd Ave. Cash Only

ForSale

Loving Hearts Couples Workshop Loving Hearts Adventure workshop, Sept. 27-29th local, fire circle, practical tools and more. www.lovingheartsadven tures.com 970-749-6120 Yoga for Young Women Ages 12-18. Fridays 4:00-5:00, starting September 13th. Smiley Building, Studio 10. Details at wildlotusyoga.yolasite.com or call Diane at 970-759-6807 Mommy and Me Dance Class Come join the fun! Now registering for classes. Call 970-749-6456. mom myandmedance.com.

Garage/YardSale

The Perfect Gift for your favorite dirtbag. Literature from Durango’s own Benighted Publications. The Desert, The Climbing Zine, The Great American Dirtbags, American Climber, Climbing Out of Bed and Graduating From College Me are available at: Maria’s Bookshop, Pine Needle Mountaineering, the Sky Store, or on the interweb at www.climbingzine.com.

Wanted Cash for Vehicles, Copper, Alum, Etc. at RJ Metal Recycle, also free appliance and other metal drop off. 970-259-3494.

Classes/Workshops Yoga for Chronic Pain Workshop Pain neuroscience education & yogic techniques for pain management. Sept. 21, 11 am-1:30 pm at Yogadurango. Register at

22 n Sept. 12, 2019

‘Humor Me’ I’ve noticed that films about struggling playwrites seem like they, well, struggle – Lainie Maxson Marketing Small and Local Businesses Media, social media, website content, SEO, etc. for small, local, independent or startup businesses. Email jnderge@gmail.com

Announcements

Himalayan Kitchen 992 Main Ave., 970-259-0956, www.himkitchen.com. Bringing you a taste of Nepal, Tibet & India. Try our allyou-can-eat lunch buffet. The dinner menu offers a variety of tempting choices, including yak, lamb, chicken, beef & seafood; extensive veggies; freshly baked bread. Full bar. Get your lunch punch card – 10th lunch free. Hours: Lunch, 11am-2:30 p.m. & dinner, Sun. Thurs., 5-9:30 p.m., Fri. & Sat. ‘til 10 p.m.

Closed 2:30 - 5, daily.

HaikuMovieReview

Horse Saddles for Sale Colorado Saddlery and Australian Long Distance saddles. Great Condition. $400$700 Sarah- clearspace108@gmail.com Aluminum Camper Shell V.good cond. Fits ‘98-’04 Tacoma. 74” bed. $65. 247-4767

ForRent Elliptical Exerciser Horizon Club Series excellent condition $150 504-615-1578 Reruns Home Furnishings Storewide sales in both stores! Coffee table, end tables, chest of drawers, entertainment center, Pier One bookcase, and bistros. FLC discount. New great stuff and daily markdowns. 572 E. 6th Ave. 3857336.

Services Piano Lessons w/fun, expert teacher. Any level or age.

Lawrence Nass 769-0889 Go to This Yard Sale, You Must!

Sat., 9/14 from 8am to noon at 2904 Cedar Ave. off of Florida Rd. Cool stuff: kegerator, kitsch, clothes, jewelry, household & more.

Estate Sale Oak table & 8 chairs, crocheted coverlet, cookware, dishes, more. 32nd Street & Holly, Sat., 9-1 DELC Yard Sale Yard sale benefiting Durango Early

telegraph

Advanced Duct Cleaning Air duct cleaning specializing in dryer vents. Improves indoor air quality; reduces dust and allergens, energy bills and fire risk. 970-247-2462 www.advanced ductcleaninginc.com

Lowest Prices on Storage!

Inside/outside near Durango and Bayfield, RJ Mini Storage. 970-259-3494 Harmony Organizing and Cleaning Services Home and office 970-403-6192 Bookkeeping, Payroll, Taxes & IRS or State Related Issues We specialize in saving you money.

Professional and accurate. Come by for a free consultation. BPX Durango, Inc. 970749-6063.

Great Price on 3/2.5 Townhome Nicely maintained, great location near Oxbow Park. W/D, 2 car gar. $1775/m + dep, 1-yr lease. Refs reqd. 970-759-2751

BodyWork erinzambroski.com Craniosacral, Reiki $40/h, therapeutic massage $85/h safe healing container 623-680-8790 Massage “Special” 1 hr. - $50 / 1.5 hrs. - $75 - foot detox$35/ in town Durango/free parking/call or text Nancy R. @ (970) 799-2202 massageintervention.life Voted best massage in Durango 2018.

Couples, cupping, local CBD. Reviews on FB + Yelp. 970-903-2984 Massages by Meg Bush, LMT 30, 60 & 90 min. 970-759-0199 Massage with Kathryn 20+ years experience offering a fusion of esalen style, deep tissue massage with therapeutic stretching & Acutonics. New clients receive $5 off first session. To schedule appt. call 970-201-3373.

RealEstate Radon Services Free radon testing and consultation. Call Colorado Radon Abatement and Detection for details. 970- 946-1618.

CommunityService Join Troop 537 for Girls Troop 537 is a new all girl troop which has all the adventure offered to boys in the Scouts BSA program. The troop also offers the chance for girls to become an Eagle Scout. The program is available for girls ages 11-17. The girl Troop 537 will be meeting at the same time and place as the boy Troop 538. Meetings will be most Mondays from 6:30 pm to 8:00 pm at the Christ the King Lutheran Church at 495 Florida Rd. For more info, contact Scout Master Tina Hartley at tina7584@hotmail.com Enter the Friends of the Library Bookmark Contest!

Students are invited to submit entries for the annual Friends of the Library Bookmark Contest. Entries must be 2 by 8 inches and include original artwork and a book-related quote. Two winners in each category will receive Maria’s Bookshop gift certificates.

Two-thousand of each winning design will be printed with the artists’ names included.

Pick up entry forms at the Durango Public Library or get them online at DurangoGov.org/Library. Submit entries to the Library by Sept. 27. For info, call 375-3380.

Alternative Horizons, a local nonprofit that supports and empowers survivors of domestic violence, is currently looking for volunteer advocates, including those who are bi-lingual, to staff their 24-Hour hotline. Their next upcoming training is October 234rd and 24th. To learn more on how to become a volunteer call 970-247-4374. If you or anyone you know is experiencing domestic violence please call our free and confidential 24Hour hotline at 970-247- 9619.

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Does your Child Struggle in School?

Does your child struggle in school, have special needs or need more support in school? Would an education advocate be helpful? For free support & information, contact: Russell 970 903 2095; russell@thearcof swco.org Arc: For people with intellectual and developmental disabilities.

TEDxDurango Needs Volunteers TEDx is coming to town on Nov. 3, uniting bright minds that foster inspiration and wonder to provoke conversations that matter. We are now accepting applications for entertainers, volunteers and an emcee. Find out more and sign up at www.TEDxDu rango.com Volunteer-Powered Program Offers Hope SASO seeks compassionate, caring people to become advocates on its 24-hour crisis hotline. Provide sexual assault survivors with support and resources to promote healing.

Call Laura, 259-3074, for information.

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telegraph

Sept. 12, 2019 n 23

24 n Sept. 12, 2019

telegraph