HORLEY TC ISSUE 4 MAY 2025

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

The Town Crier Issue 4, May 2025

Horley Edition Serving the communities of Horley, Smallfield, Gatwick, Copthorne, Burstow, Outwood, Salfords and the surrounding areas

Let’s help one another to do well and prosper!

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Welcome to the May 2025 issue of the Horley Town Crier !

The cover photograph is by Horley’s favourite photographer Julie Suttle.

I am very pleased to present to you the May 2025 issue of the Horley Town Crier community magazine.

The groups, club, societies, charities, artists and businesses of the community present a varied and interesting read that I’m confident you will enjoy.

Click banner for more info

In this issue . . . .

So once more, my heartfelt thanks to everyone who played their part in putting this issue together.

As time goes on and we really groove this project in, the Town Crier is getting better and better and becoming a stronger and stronger voice and forum for the community.

And just to briefly reiterate some Town Crier Policies regarding free promotion, paid advertising and so forth, please see this page where I've tried to give you a succinct guide.

Become a Columnist

I’m very pleased to acknowledge those who have kindly agreed to contribute a column of tips and advice each month for the general edification and enlightenment of the community.

If you feel you have something to offer and would like to become a monthly columnist, please feel free to contact me at any time. Thank you!

Submit!

The door is now wide open for your submissions for the June issue. The deadline for the June issue is 6pm on June19th.

Happy May! by Angela Sara West page 3 Win VIP Tickets …. page 4 Cyber Training page 6 The Portland Vets Column page 7 Horley Local History Society page 8 Age Concern Open Day page 8 Henry Smith Charity, Horley page 9 Horley Men’s Shed page 10 British Sugarcraft Guild page 11 JJ’s Epic Eats page 12 The Horley Lions page 13 Franklin Music Musical Soirees page 13 A Recipe That Probably Won’t Kill You page 14 A Book that Probably Won’t Kill You page 14 Dinosaurs May Have Worn Hats page 15 “Clue” at the Archway - a Review page 16 The Man Who Killed England page 18 Let’s Dance Melange page 19 Horley United FC Champions! page 20 Promote Yourself In the Town Crier page 22 Suppertime Concerts - Franklin Music page 23 Horley Community Choir page 25 Walking the Kingdom page 26 Horley Team Ministry page 28 French Recipe of the Month page 29 The Busk Stops Now! page 29

For a guide as to the type of features we are looking for and how to submit, please visit the Town Crier website here To contact the editor, please email: horleytowncrier@gmail.com 2

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Happy May!

by Town Crier columnist Angela Sara West Wow, SO much has happened since last month’s column, kicking off with the launch of former Surreyite Sir Richard Branson’s hot new hotel – Virgin Hotels London-Shoreditch!

I was honoured to be invited to the billionaire businessman’s boutique hotel launch party and to interview Richard again for the covers of various magazines.

“The team has done such a brilliant job transforming the hotel,” the Virgin boss told me on launching his first hotel in the capital. “My favourite addition is the Hidden Grooves HiFi Lounge - a 70s-style listening bar, and a lovely tribute to Virgin’s musical Up!’ with the band’s no.1 hit single - plus a sizzling Surroots.” rey Fashion Week extravaganza and fun “I also love the fabulous rooftop pool, stunning new afterparty with a top DJ set from Dub Pistols’ lead singer Barry Ashworth of ‘Lock, Stock and Two suites with Virgin Hotels’ iconic red doors and famous ‘lounge beds’, and access to exclusive treats,” Smoking Barrels’ fame, who hails from my home he revealed. “Guests can also enjoy Marlin’s on the village of Carshalton.

Roof restaurant, a private gym, treatment rooms and Alongside my role as a celebrity cover journalist for rooftop club, and I can’t wait to try the new various local, national and international magazines, signature restaurant, arriving this spring!”

I’m also a judge for the prestigious Surrey Awards – shortlisting the best of our county’s brilliant Oozing glamour, London’s hip new 5* global hub businesses before they go to the public vote – and boasts an industrial-style feel with exposed bricks, steel-framed windows and incredible vibes. With a am the co-founder of Surrey Fashion Week and its celebrity charity catwalk shows, too, which we sushi lounge and Ibiza-inspired private nightclub, gym, spa and more to boot, guests at Virgin Hotels’ launched with Surrey’s own Pussycat Doll Kimberly Wyatt.

London-Shoreditch are spoilt for choice.

With the glitzy Surrey Awards ceremony hosted by my good friend Jason Burrill (‘Bond’ star and ‘Big Brother 2016’ winner) and Radio Jackie’s Emilie Kate Owen, my VIP guests at The Surrey Awards x Surrey Fashion Week 2025 included Ben Ofoedu from Phats & Small, phenomenal young opera star Emma Nuule, who blew the roof off with her outstanding rendition of ‘Nessun Dorma’ – talk It was really great to meet Sir Richard Branson again, following our chat a few years ago about his about a standing ovation! – designer/model/actress hotel and villas on Mallorca, which you can read on Nina Naustdal and legendary music producer Ron Tom (Sugababes, All Saints, Gabrielle).

Channel 4’s ‘A Place in the Sun’ website here: www.aplaceinthesun.com/articles/2018/05/whySurrey stars Bradley McIntosh from BRIT Awarddoes-richard-branson-love-mallorca winning S Club, DJ Mike Read and England cricketer Phil ‘Tuffers’ Tufnell were also among our Star-Studded Surrey Awards x Surrey Fashion celebrity guests.

Week 2025 Serving up mouthwatering modern Mediterranean cuisine, take a refreshing dip in the iconic rooftop pool and drink in the views at the pool-bar-lounge with live music, with the whole of London at your feet, before indulging in a decadent dining experience.

Another highlight of the night was our fab Surrey Fashion Week brands Monice London, Howard & Co. Attire, House of Afrika and edgy new denim jacket designers Skinner & Vale winning ALL the coveted Surrey Awards for Best Fashion!

Last Thursday saw our glamorous Surrey Awards x Surrey Fashion Week at G Live, Guildford, with sensational performances from legendary Sheyla Bonnick from Boney M, Reef frontman Gary Stringer - who ensured we all ‘Placed Our Hands 3

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

activities available for the kids!

WIN VIP Tickets to The Polo Cup Finals in Windsor, Superyacht Charters National press and luxury lifestyle magazine in Mallorca, Mind & Body Bootcamps, photographers will be in attendance and, if you have watched the movie 'Pretty Woman' you will know Fine Dining in the Surrey Hills & that 'treading the divots' is a must between matches, More! so dress to impress for both the camera and the occasion.

by Angela Sara West

Your hospitality package in the exclusive VIP area includes: - Three-Course Meal with Wines - Excellent View of the Polo Matches - Reserved Seating in Luxury Marquee - Live Entertainment Check out the fantastic prizes at rock-bottom prices, - Chill-out Area + Whiskey & Cigar Lounge all in aid of our chosen charity – the children’s unit - Secure Reserved Parking Places at The Royal Marsden Hospital in Surrey.

- Excellent Networking - Afterparty with DJ & Live Band We have everything from top VIP tickets to the revered Asia Cup Polo in Windsor, superyacht Whether it's the Polo in Windsor, setting sail from charters in Mallorca worth a whopping £50k, and Palma on your own superyacht party in the sparkling luxury fine dining experiences at multi-awardMed, or securing celebrity signed merch or another winning Kinghams in Shere and Beaverbrook in the top prize, you'll find something for all in our sizzling stunning Surrey Hills, to celebrity aesthetic silent auction! Get bidding NOW to be in with a treatments in Surrey salons, mind & body bootcamps chance of bagging a bargain luxury experience or and delectable award-winning vodka bundles, all at premium product to treat yourself, your family and just a snip of the retail price. friends.

YOU can WIN FANTASTIC PRIZES in our sensational silent auction accompanying our esteemed Surrey Awards x Surrey Fashion Week 2025 event. (see previous page)

Looking for love? We even have hot dates with a former Miss Kingston - now an international cover model - and our dashing Surrey Fashion Week (SFW) model & philanthropic hero John Parker from John’s Red Bus (delivering humanitarian aid for Ukraine) up for grabs!

Visit www.jumblebee.co.uk/ surreyfashionweekxsurreyawardscharityauction2025 Best of luck!

Join us at Surrey Fashion Week x Miss Britannia At The Polo!

Held under Royal Patronage from the Jaipur Royal Family, the esteemed Asia Cup Polo event in What’s more, for just £30 – and with 50% going to Windsor is a highlight of the summer social charity - you can also clinch non-hospitality tickets calendar, combining world-class polo, exceptional hospitality, plus a vibrant atmosphere with ambient to the Cup Polo Finals Day in Windsor on Sun 29th live music, setting the perfect tone for a day of sport June, where we will be staging our Surrey Fashion and celebration. With a 3-course gourmet lunch with Week celebrity charity catwalk show in wine included, plus world-class entertainment, enjoy collaboration with Miss Britannia! a super-glam Surrey Fashion Week showcase with our Surrey Award-winning fashion brands hosted by Enjoy two exciting games of polo followed by the celebrity milliner Louis Mariette, plus VIP shopping prize ceremony, plus an exciting Surrey Fashion Week (SFW) celebrity catwalk extravaganza with a in the Shopping Village and a fun afterparty. few famous faces and our favourite Surrey Awardwinning SFW brands. Secure your tickets now for Immerse yourself in an unparalleled and unique ambiance at this incredible quintessentially English just £30 here! www.tickettailor.com/events/ event with two fantastic hospitality tickets currently celebrasianreasiacuppolo/1696085 costing just £70 for the 2, but with a value of nearly All profits after fees will go to charity via our new £400! So please place a bid and support our fundraising platform The Triple C (Cancer Care amazing cancer charity. Set in the picturesque Community): www.thetriplec.co.uk parkland of the private Winkfield Polo Club in Windsor in an atmosphere of prestige, excitement For information about the hospitality packages and camaraderie, this exclusive event promises an unparalleled blend of top-class sport, entertainment, available, please email me at angelasarawest@gmail.com fashion and luxury hospitality. The 29th is Finals Day and a family day, so there will be plenty of 4

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Dates for 2025

25th May, 29th June, 27th July, None in August, 28th September, 26th October, 23rd November and 28th December

Award Winning Sauces!

I have made these sauces to have sting in the tail and pack plenty of flavour. They will definitely excite your taste buds and keep you coming back for more! My sauces are incredibly versatile and can be used for dipping, marinating or drizzling!

I won awards in 2023, 2024 and this year 2025.

VISIT MY WEBSITE NOW FOR MORE!

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Cyber Training at Reigate and Banstead Community Centres We're excited to announce that our community centres are launching a new Cyber Training Program for Children and a parent, designed to equip young learners (ages 10 to 14yrs) with essential digital skills, cyber safety knowledge, and hands-on experience in a fun, engaging environment.

This training will equip participants with the essential skills below: Online Identity and Privacy - How to protect their personal information Cyberbullying - Kindness and respect online Stranger Danger - Who is a stranger online Games and social media - How to be safe on platforms like Roblox, YouTube, TikTok etc Passwords and Devices - Importance of strong passwords Parent Controls and Tools - Setting up filters, screen time limits and monitoring tools Signs of Trouble - How to spot if your child is being bullied or groomed online Creating a Cyber Safe Home - Open communication strategies Digital Footprint Awareness - Teaching the permanence of online actions To book please visit: https://bookwhen.com/communitycentres Reigate & Banstead Borough Council, Town Hall, Castlefield Road, Reigate, Surrey, RH2 0SH www.reigate-banstead.gov.uk Follow us on X, Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, and Nextdoor Want to peek inside our community centres? Tour the centres with our online walkthroughs here: Banstead, Horley, Woodhatch 6

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025 The Horley Local History Society presents . . . .

The History of the Wey and Arun Canal.

Why not come along to the next meeting of Horley Local History Society on Tuesday 24th June and hear about the history of the Wey and Arun Canal.

We shall meet at 7.30pm for an 8.00pm start at Horley The first serious attempt to join the Wey and Arun Community rivers was made in 1641. Later during the Centre, Regent Napoleonic wars (1799-1815), the sea route from Hall, Albert London via the English Channel to Portsmouth Road, Horley. where the Royal Navy was based, was fraught with Tea and coffee danger from French ships. However, it was realised will be available. that by joining and making navigable the Thames, Wey and Arun rivers, cargoes including naval Free car parking supplies could travel more safely. is available in the underground Also, the journey would take only four days and car park below goods could be delivered to inland wharves along the Regent Hall. the route. Thus, in 1784 a Petition was presented to the House of Lords to cut a new canal.

Non-Members are welcome for a nominal entry fee of £2 each but this is refundable if you join HLHS. Come along and hear about the history of the Canal Membership costs £10 for individuals or £15 for and its restoration by a team of dedicated couples and you can join on the night. enthusiasts.

Age Concern MRR is having an Open Day! We have a mainstream Day Centre including transport, a Men’s Shed and offer a Befriending Service to people living in Merstham, Redhill, Reigate and Horley.

We run the centre on a membership basis, our members call it their “club” this means that you tend to see the same faces when you come and that you’re all usually here for the same amount of time which can help with getting to know people and making friends.

We also have a small group of dedicated staff and volunteers, so you get to know us well. It’s really not like it is portrayed on TV! We are having an open day so you can come and bring your Mum, Dad, Neighbour, Friend or yourself to have a look around and see where we are, meet some of the team, see our Centre and the Men’s Shed, try/watch the seated exercise class, have a hand massage, a cuppa tea and see if you’d like to join us.

Or if you are interested in volunteering for our charity We’d love to meet you !

Pop along ….

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Henry Smith Charity, Horley Henry Smith Charity, Horley, has been helping people who are facing financial challenges as a result of their social or economic circumstances since 1628.

In case you are wondering how this local charity is funded; we are one of about 150 similar local charities across England that receives an annual grant from the Henry Smith National Charity. Each one was set up in about 1628 in accordance with the Will of Henry Smith who was a City of London Merchant. The Horley Charity is independently registered with the Charity Commission and received a revised Constitution in 2024.

We provide monetary grants to people living within the Ancient Parish of Horley who are facing poverty as a result of their social or economic circumstances.

We also provide grants to support charities and community organisations having similar objects to those of the Henry Smith Horley Charity and working within the Ancient Parish for the benefit of the public.

More specifically, we help individuals and families who live in Horley, Salfords, Sidlow and South Earlswood who need clothes and shoes for themselves and their children, including school uniforms.

All you have to do is contact us There’s no cost or obligation for you.

In addition, we help with funding for replacement cookers, fridges, tumble dryers and mattresses.

So why not visit our website, download an Application Form, fill it in, then email or text it to us.

We also help students going into university and technical training who need help with study materials and trade equipment.

Everything is confidential and we’ll sort things out quickly.

This is just a sample of the things we help to fund but however we assist, our aim is to improve the circumstances for each person that we assist.

www.henrysmithcharityhorley.org.uk

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

The Horley Men’s Shed

Connection, conversation and creation The Men’s Shed have been very busy, raising £150 at the Leisure Centre Spring Market in April and finishing the fit out of our new shed.

Money towards the shed came from the Town Mayor, Martin Saunders who presented us with a cheque on his last day.

The same day we received a donation of wood from Tone Scaffolding. We have also received £500 from the East Surrey Community Participatory Budget which has gone towards specialist woodworking machines.

We are busy replenishing our stock of bird boxes and feeders, bug towers, hedgehog houses, boot and coat hangers, dog beds, bat boxes, garden planters and much more for our stall at the Horley Carnival on June 21st, come along for a chat and buy a very reasonably priced upcycled and handcrafted product.

We can make planters to order and one of our very happy customers sent us a lovely photo of her planters in position and filled with plants.

We will be exhibiting at the Methodist Flower Festival on June 6th to the 8th, come and see our wooden flowers!

The Men’s Shed have also entered a team in the annual Horley Lions Skittles Tournament on June 3rd.

We are open every Tuesday behind the Horley Health Hub, 120 Victoria Road from 9 am until 3 pm with two sheds which contain a range of equipment, a large outside area and access to a rest area where we stop for regular breaks and lunch with guys coming and going as they like.

The “Shedders” can be from 18 to 108 years old with a huge range of backgrounds and skill levels, from none to experts but we are a men-only group.

We are self funding through subs (£1 a week if you can afford it) or by selling things we have made. If you are interested just pop in one Tuesday and meet us.

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

• •

The Crawley Branch British Sugarcraft Guild

by Karen Grantham Our monthly branch meetings are held in Horley at the Tesco Extra Community Room, Reigate Road, Hookwood RH6 0AT. We are only a small group but very lucky with a free venue.

We are still getting enquiries of interest. Jamie Smyth came in January for a flower demo and we have some great demos lined up for the next few months including: • Tanya Tooley – Wafer Flowers • Vicky Teather – Baby Modelling

Alison Henderson – Brush embroidery Jo Dear – Handbags

The month after each demo we have a branch workshop so we can have a go at making what we had seen and try out new techniques, which is always great fun. At most meetings we hold a small fun raffle. All our events are recorded and updated on our Facebook page which is slowly growing: we have 342 followers and have had 309 likes on posts.

Members also keep in touch with each other on a branch WhatsApp group and we had a Christmas meal together.

We have also updated our email address which is now BSGcrawley@outlook.com.

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

JJ’s Epic Eats - the Best Grub Guide in Town This month JJ Suttle went to the

Jack Fairman Wetherspoons pub

In an Art Deco-style building, in Victoria Road, Horley, which was built in 1933 as a car showroom for the Fairman family, sits the Jack Fairman Wetherspoons pub. I have been going there for breakfasts since I was 2 years old, so I wanted to check out the evening menu a bit more.

Recently upgraded with new chairs, the pub has a classic feel to it, with raised booth areas and general seating alongside a long bar area and an open fire in the winter.

If you’re after decent pub grub at great prices, The Jack Fairman hits the mark. Like many Wetherspoons, it delivers what it promises: familiar favourites, many dishes, optional extras, and a bill that won’t make you wince.

Born and raised in Horley, JJ is our 12-year-old food review writer who brings fresh and fearless opinions to the table with a side of personality.

made the experience feel that bit more welcoming.

Cutlery was clean, as expected, and there’s a separate condiment station where you help yourself to sauces. It had all the basics covered: ketchup, brown sauce, mustard, mayo, sweet chilli, tartare, vinegar, salt, and pepper.

Despite it being quite busy, the atmosphere was a bit flat – there's no background music, so you end up hearing everyone else’s conversations. Not a deal-breaker, but it could benefit from a bit more ambiance.

All in all, a great value, quick dinner – and you The menu is full of pub classics – burgers, curries, won’t get better food, unless you head for a more pizzas and the ever-popular all-day breakfast. On expensive, high-end restaurant. this visit, the food was well-cooked, and arrived Wetherspoons does what it says on the tin. quickly.

From placing our order on the Wetherspoons app to receiving our food, it took just 14 minutes and 34 seconds – perfect for anyone who’s proper hungry!

The app is easy to use, and having food and drinks brought straight to the table is as expected in pubs these days. Bear in mind though, if you want to eat in courses (like having starters first), you need to order at the bar, as everything arrives at the same time when you order on the app.

My highlight of our meal was the crispy chicken wings – crunchy with a nice fry and with a range of sauces to suit your taste they will be great for anyone. They come in 2 sizes, a great option as a starter or to share.

The pepperoni pizza was another winner, with an overflowing layer of tomato sauce, lots of cheese and a generous topping of pepperoni – a great balance of flavours on the base.

My mum said that the classic American cheeseburger patties had a good, beefy flavour, tasty, but might leave bigger appetites wanting a bit more bread to match the meat. Chips were chips!

The staff were kind and friendly, taking the time to chat and share a few jokes – a small thing that 12

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

The Horley Lions The Horley Lions Easter Egg Draw has raised £1500 which will be donated to the LRF (Lucy Raynor Foundation) who do a fantastic job of supporting our youngsters who are struggling with Mental Health We are looking forward to our next Fundraising event which is our Skittles Week being held every evening at the Horley Cricket Club starting on Monday 2-6th June.

So please come down & support us as there will be a Raffle you can enter as well as our new BBQ equipment selling lovely hotdogs & burgers This year we are fundraising for the Children’s Ward at East Surrey Hospital. For more information about our Skittles Week, click here.

Calling All Skilled Performers and Dedicated Music Students!

PERFORMERS WANTED We’re looking for musicians of all levels to take part in the next Franklin Music Open Concert Platform.

TIME: Saturday 28th June 4:00–5:30 PM PLACE: St. John's Church, Earlswood RH1 6QA Whether you're a beginner, seasoned performer, soloist, part of an ensemble, or composer, come share your music in a warm and supportive space. Suitable for performers of any age.

Sign up now - limited spots available To apply, please send a small biography and repertoire which you would like to perform.

Each performance should be under 8 minutes.

DM or email info@franklinmusic.net 13

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And here’s a book that probably won’t kill you either

A RECIPE THAT PROBABLY WON’T KILL YOU For several years now, as part of making our household pretty much 100% chemical-free, we’ve been using a home-made environmentally-friendly cleaning liquid that does a very, very good job and is made of natural ingredients.

We use it in the washing machine and as an all-round household cleaner, plus washing-up liquid. It is very good at getting stains out of the carpet, such as chocolate (me) or vomit (the cat) or even poo (the cat also).

It is odourless although you can add drops of essential oils of your choice if you want it scented.

The recipe below will make enough to last up to three months at a cost of 1 to 2 quid depending on which soap you use. We use an expensive natural olive oil soap from France so the cost is around two quid for 4 -8 weeks, which is pretty cheap considering we use it for almost everything.

Here is the recipe.

Take a block of natural olive oil soap (at least 78% olive oil plus other natural oils). Cut off 100g of the soap and grate it using a cheese grater into a large saucepan.

Add 1 litre of boiling water and stir thoroughly until the soap is all dissolved.

Allow the mixture to stand overnight.

A housewife, an accountant, a shopkeeper and a chicken factory manager inadvertently start Earth's first interstellar war and they are very sorry about that.

Plus Earth's first interstellar sing-song, featuring a well-known rugby song and they are very sorry about that too!

Also features some attempted probing and quite a lot of running away.

"Excellently hilarious book! " GK "I thoroughly enjoyed it but I think you should put a warning on the cover, advising people not to read it in public, I giggled a lot & laughed out loud several times, very embarrassing when I'm sitting in a coffee shop! " GF

Add 2 tablespoons of bicarbonate of soda plus 2 tablespoons of soda crystals. Stir thoroughly.

Add 1 litre of cold water. Stir thoroughly.

Add another litre of cold water. Stir thoroughly.

And that’s it. You now have cleaning fluid/washing machine soap/washing-up liquid for about 8 weeks.

We store ours in an old 5L plastic spring water container. You’ll need to give it a shake each time you use it.

You’ll probably find that when your supply runs out there is a soapy sludge at the bottom of your container. Don’t throw it away. Mx it in with the water when you make your next batch.

Waste not, want not!

"The author’s signature blend of wry humour and observational skill makes this short story a joy to read. Gently satirical, it good-naturedly pokes fun at human society while hinting at a darker reality beneath.

"Treat yourself to a copy, you won't regret it. Be warned though, this is not a book to read in a library . . . too many laugh-out-loud moments."

Ingenue Magazine Buy it now while Earth is still free or join the Earth Resistance (Library Branch) Available in eBook and Paperback:

Got a healthy recipe you want to share?

Please send it to the editor at horleytowncrier@gmail.com

Find more details here 14

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Dinosaurs May Have Worn Hats, Scientists Believe Study Results in Shock New Discovery about Life in the Jurassic A recent re-examination of prehistoric fossils by Tyrannosaurus Rex, the sartorially elegant scientists at the Natural History Museum in Neasden Velociraptor could be distinguished by its top hat. has resulted in discoveries that have shaken the scientific world to its core.

The brontosaurus is believed to have favoured the balaclava in an effort not to be recognized.

The very latest micro-imaging technology and algorithms that enable researchers to painstakingly sift fact from fiction have facilitated a minutely close scrutiny of hundreds of fossils from the Jurassic Your submissions for the Town Period.

Crier humour and satire feature are most welcome!

This five-year-long study had brought to light facts about the dinosaurs that will cause us to reevaluate everything we thought we knew about these magnificent yet extensively misunderstood creatures.

A case in point is what the study has revealed about the dinosaurs' penchant for wearing hats.

Please send them to horleytowncrier@gmail.com

Whilst the bowler hat was favoured by 15

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

‘Clue’ at The Archway - Horley's Theatre with a Hollywood Seal of Approval by its Surrey Patron, Dame Judi Dench!

A top-notch review of the ‘perfect’ play at our local theatre by our celebrity journalist Angela Sara West @angela_sara_west and our cover photographer Julie Suttle @purepicsbyjules Hidden away beneath Horley’s historic railway station, the Archway Theatre is a must-visit gem of the local arts scene.

Opening Night of Clue

As a celebrity journalist and cover photographer for the new Horley Town Crier and other local, national Quirky, intimate and oozing character, it’s long been and international magazines, we were honoured to be invited to the opening night of 'Clue' at this a cherished space for amateur dramatics, with the humble but high-class theatre, at which we rocked recent performance of the much-loved play Clue up with great expectations - and it didn’t disappoint. proving just how talented Horley’s homegrown Everything about this enjoyable and exceptional theatrical community truly is. evening out completely blew us away…

Bond Star Dame Judi Dench at The Archway Directed by James Murtagh, we had the pleasure of chatting with the talented clued-up director ahead of the first flawless, outstanding live performance on the opening night.

“I’m so proud of everyone involved in the production,” James exclaimed. “The cast and crew have worked incredibly hard both on stage and behind the scenes to ensure we deliver the highestlevel amateur theatre you’ll get."

But did you know that Surrey’s own Hollywood heavyweight - ‘Bond’ star Dame Judi Dench - is such a huge fan of this exceptional theatrical establishment "underneath the arches", as depicted in The Arches’ fascinating timeline adorning the wall of the buzzing bar, that she kindly became a patron of this little - but mighty - lovely local theatre?

And he wasn’t wrong. Hard pressed to remember we were in a thriving theatre in the heart of Horley, we were subsequently so fully immersed in a sensational show of such high quality and standard that we felt we were experiencing a London West End show!

The Play With A Twist This slick production was a fast-paced, sharply delivered romp through the classic ‘whodunnit’ territory of the beloved board game.

In fact, in February this year, Dame Judi even took to the stage here in Horley, regaling stories from her colourful past, treating lucky attendees to a Adapted from the screenplay by Jonathan Lynn and wonderful insightful evening of delightful tales and Sandy Rustin, this riveting play is set in a spooky laughter. mansion, where six strangers with shady pasts are invited to dinner and promptly find themselves Capturing her audience from the very first moment embroiled in a murder mystery full of secrets, she entered stage left, the inspiring theatrical laughs, and, of course, the occasional candlestick! powerhouse treated her much-in-awe audience to a moving rendition of Cleopatra's monologue before the national acting treasure joined her captivated Continued on following page crowd in the bijou bar and chatted with many of the Archway's members, signing books, offering advice and more!

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

‘Clue’ continued from previous page Spot-On Casting From the moment the lights dimmed, the cast had the audience hooked. Each familiar character Colonel Mustard, Professor Plum and Miss Scarlet (perfectly played by our friend Mandy Humphries, whom we first met when we joined Horley Infants’ school PTA) among them - was brought to life with both wit and theatrical flair.

The casting was spot on, with each accomplished actor leaning into their chosen character’s Angela and Julie with director eccentricities without ever tipping into caricature.

James Murtagh The physical comedy was particularly strong, with timing and expression that had the audience in roars Quirky, engaging, and with a fun dose of the of laughter throughout. absurd, we cannot recommend this high-quality Director James' direction cleverly balanced suspense performance enough. and silliness, allowing the classic farcical elements Our advice? Arrive early to soak up the warm and to shine through while keeping the mystery at the welcoming ambiance of the cosy Arches bar before heart of the story alive. Cheeky double entendres a show in this top-notch auditorium and indulge in a and punchy one-liners were delivered with a unique buzzing ambience with an array of mischievous twinkle, while the energy on stage exuded in spades. The chemistry among the cast was pre-theatre drinks in which to partake. palpable, making for a seamless ensemble What's more, you can even order your interval performance. drinks in advance so they're ready and waiting, avoiding a queue at the bar. With sensational service Behind-The-Scenes Magic We must also mention and praise the magic behind and reviews of the show, what are you waiting for?!! the scenes. As always at the Archway, the www.archwaytheatre.co.uk sensational sets and props were crafted by volunteers, and their professional, meticulous dedication shows. The mansion set was charmingly atmospheric and authentic, while the intimate layout of the theatre meant the audience was pulled right into the action, making for a fully immersive experience.

Even the scenery changes were cleverly handled.

Rather than hidden behind blackouts, moveable props were integrated into the performance in ways that captured the audience’s attention, often adding to the humour and momentum of the play.

Wherever you sit in the plush comfy seats of this perfectly formed small theatre, you’re never far from the stage, making every gasp, laugh and suspicious glance feel all the more immersive.

Delivered with quality, confident and spot-on acting, creativity and great comedic timing, Clue at the Archway Theatre is an absolute triumph of community theatre.

Whether you're a fan of the board game, the film, or just a good old-fashioned murder mystery with a twist, this fabulous production delivers all the right clues.

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

The Man Who Killed England by Steve Cook Last night England perished in my sleep; Her cry for help was tangled in my dreams.

Smothered by their folds, held baby-like and weak, I may have stirred but was not woken by her screams.

And fleece the flock with fey agendum hid Behind “solutions” that always honest men bear ill, Who – while he tighter nails our coffin lid – Sees his coffers and psychotic dreams fulfilled.

And when dawn broke with dismal light I woke To winter’s paean hung upon the barbs of her defeat, Her wilted rose by blight of bare-faced liars choked, Her people strangled by their own elite.

I paid my tax and (honest) never broke the law And drove with care along the middle of the road And if I could I would have done much more But the medication then kicked in and so I dozed.

From a thousand tiny wounds of small neglects, The talents of her people frittered all away, Asset-stripped and sick with tax and debt Did she expire in slow inglorious decay.

Somehow I missed the better part of this glum tale, The diagnostic why’s and wherefores of our plight, Or perhaps we citizens were spared the odd detail The “who” and “how” kept out of sight.

A million lenses framed her agonized demise, Snapped each and every knife-twist of her pain, Freeze-framed, re-wound and then in some archive Each mishap stored from whence reviewed again.

For fear that we might make sense of it and wake And understanding fill us with its power, So that energised we might stir and then re-take From feral hands the febrile stem of the nation’s flower.

Fine-etched the small components of her death I knew, Slept through but studied after the event, In armchair ease with dull detachment viewed, Like a soap or sitcom scripted for lament.

Men of ill intent usurped the offices of state And so the state ere long was organised for crime ‘Gainst we for whom their scams did seal the fate Of a nation pushed, not fallen, to decline.

It seemed to me she got the rough end of the script: Good people never should be written from the plot, But the moving tape records and serves its writ: No rewinds change the truth of it one jot.

Yet every one of us ne’er less did play our part, For where we dare not look does evil bloom And the sum of all our blind eyes turned grew vast And for the spread of evil obligingly made room.

Commercial breaks and sitcoms came and went, Like prosy time-released each to its slot, But the tape ran on until all life was spent And just before the end it seems that I dozed off.

The collective irresponsibilities of folk in truth Do government’s tomfoolery comprise, For where from decency they hold themselves aloof, Entrusting it to criminals, it dies.

But slumber carries with it its own curse, That he who sleeps is doomed at last to wake And there the TV waits to tell the worst Of what he tried to miss but never could escape.

Behind each sorry aspect of this mess there lies Some criminal self-serving with intent, For good men’s efforts never would contrive To snare good men in such predicament.

I watched each documented exposé – I did my bit – That mapped each sorry twist of her decline And somberly agreed how bad was all of it, That something should be done while there’s still time.

For evil to take root and win the day Alone requires that good men all do naught: They sleep or wait or look away And so forfeit the battles they never truly fought.

How dutifully I watched each televised debate Confirming it was all some governmental wrong And what could anybody do but wait For some new messianic nut to come along

I would have fought of course, I always planned To rise and join the fray.

I hope you will forgive I lived life second-hand; I thought of it but my armchair barred the way.

Attention local poets and lyricists!

Submit your verse to the Town Crier. See website for details

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

HORLEY UNITED FC U14 CROWNED LEAGUE CHAMPIONS 2024/2025!

Horley United FC U14 have secured victory and are promoted to the Premier Division of the Epsom & Ewell League next season. The team and coaches have shown incredible determination and teamwork throughout the season. The club and community are extremely proud. Thank you to all the parents, carers and supporters, their contribution has been invaluable. And to our sponsors D & R Carpentry, Joshua Lewis Carpentry & Construction, James Dean Estate Agents Horley, thank you for your continued support of this team and club, it would not have been possible without you!

CONGRATULATIONS!

Celebrations were also in order at the AMEX for Horley United FC U12 Emerald. The team finished runners up earning promotion to Division 2 of the Mid Sussex League next season. Well done team!

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

AS THE SEASON ENDS THE TOURNAMENTS BEGIN FOR HORLEY UNITED FC

U12 Emerald Semi Finalists

U12 Emerald Semi Finalists

U11 Gold Broadbridge Heath Tournament

U9 Girls Burgess Hill Tournament

U12 Gold Burgess Hill

U9 Boys Horley Town

U8 Gold Semi Finalists Three Bridges Tournament

U8 Emerald Worthing Tournament

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Promote Yourself in the Town Crier Become a Columnist If you belong to or are active in the communities embraced by this magazine, you can promote yourself, your community activity, charity, club society, special interest, hobby, cause célèbre or small local business in it.

Free promotion

Another way to promote your enterprise (whether for-profit or not-for-profit) is to become a columnist for the magazine providing a monthly article that gives people advice and tips from your area of expertise - a great way to promote your competence and good will. In exchange for providing interesting material for our readers, and a small monthly donation you get monthly free advertising. To apply to have a column, please email the editor at horleytowncrier@gmail.com and we’ll give your proposal fair consideration.

If you are a charity or not-for-profit club, society, association or group, you can promote free of charge. In exchange, if you can contribute a small donation this will be appreciated. Donations are not obligatory but in the interests of fairness, those Paid Advertising in the Town Crier who have helped with donations will, where need In order to avoid becoming just another advertiser over-filled with ads, we are making only a limited arises, be given priority in proportion to their amount of space available for advertising. This generosity. amounts to the equivalent of one page of advertising for every four pages of articles. It is to As we want to avoid the Town Crier becoming the benefit of advertisers to have a magazine full just another advertiser in which articles play second-fiddle to advertisements, we ask that where of content people will want to read without a possible you submit an article about your charity, barrage of advertisements competing for their attention. activity, event and so forth that will provide an interesting and engaging read. Such articles can be Advertising costs are being kept low and amount any length up to about 600 words and should be to the equivalent of roughly £10 or less per week accompanied where possible with some pictures for a quarter page ad. Our full pricing structure can that will help grab attention plus any contact/ website/social media details you would like people be found here to have.

To give further value for your paid advert, while Having said that, we will also do our best to place you have a paid ad running in the magazine we your announcements, event promo and so forth so will not run a paid ad for a competitor selling the same product or service. Where your ad clashes please do send them in. with a free advertorial by a competitor, the advertorial will be placed in a different part of the Best formats for images are JPEG and PNG. magazine and every effort made to have your paid ad appear earlier in the magazine. Our policies Free Promotion for Local Businesses regarding paid advertising are further explained If you are a local for-profit operation we will here provide one free advertorial-style article per business. As described above we are looking for We have also made advertising space available on something that will engage, inform, inspire or the Town Crier website. See the details here interest our readers. Length can be up to 600 words, which would give you a full page of free The door is also open for you to submit humorous/ advertising. Please also provide some pictures and satirical articles, poetry and verse, “how-to” tips full contact/website/social media details. and advice, interesting/entertaining news and Alongside the opportunity for a free advertorial we titbits, recipes etc and if we publish your also provide very affordable advertising space (see submission you can include a link to the website below). of your choice.

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Phone: 07948702788

Translations into and from French

30 years experience Turnaround and prices to suit your needs WHETHER YOU NEED THE TRANSLATION OF : • • •

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OR Calls made to French-speaking countries I can help!

I cater for businesses, large or small, as well as private individuals, keeping my prices competitive while understanding that speed is of the essence. Of course, quality will never be sacrificed in the process.

QUALIFICATIONS • Holder of the Diploma in Translation from the Chartered Institute of Linguists • Member of the Chartered Institute of Linguists • Translating professionally since 1995 •

Level 3 community interpreter

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"Dominique has been helping us negotiate some of the more incomprehensible areas of French red tape for some years now! We would have found things a lot more difficult, if not impossible, without her willing & able assistance."

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House sale documents Birth, marriage and death certificates

Visit to your home or office if necessary to go over your requirements 24

CONTACT ME NOW! Dominique Cook French translator since 1995 MCIOL, DipTrans, CIOL Phone: 07948 702788 Email: domicook64 @gmail.com

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Walking the Kingdom 2015

by Steve Cook

An adventure revisited

I was looking for something else on my computer and found some old pics of the "Walk the Kingdom" caper I did in 2015. On this date ten years ago, at the youthful age of a mere 63, I was about a week into my planned walk of the British mainland coast.

The gig was to walk the entire British coast (about 4K miles) to raise funds for Drug Education for Kids, specifically for my good mate Pete Dwan, former British Thai boxing champion, who at that time was doing superb drug education talks for children.

I wanted to help Pete as best I could because what he was doing was in my opinion so valuable. I have worked in drug rehabilitation - much of which was putting people through drug withdrawal - and seen first-hand the devastating damage drugs can do to their users and such an heroic effort to arm kids with enough knowledge to help them make the right decisions and avoid the deadly trap that drugs comprise was well worth my giving it all the support I could muster.

Well, I wasn’t as good at fisticuffs as Pete nor was I good at giving talks but I realised that (albeit with practice) I could be fairly good at walking.

So that is what I did!

I started in my home town of East Grinstead, walked south to Brighton, turned left at the sea and just kept on walking. I had planned to be the oldest person ever to have done the walk (I was 63 at the time and would have been 64 by the time I finished it).

But here for nostalgia's sake are the pics I found from that escapade. After ten years I can’t recall where three of them were taken. The bloke with the mayoral chain was the Lord Provost of Edinburgh a very, very nice man. The one where I am celebrating by the side of a main road was where I crossed the border into Scotland having walked off my you-know-what for many weeks.

I got about a quarter of the way - about 1100 miles all around the coast of Sussex, Kent, Essex, Suffolk, Norfolk, Lincolnshire, Yorkshire, Northumberland etc - crossed the Forth Bridge and reached North Queensferry in Scotland before a broken toe forced me to retire (I am a bit of a wuss when it comes to pain).

I have a great many fond memories of that adventure. Not least of which is the bountiful kindness of the people I met and was helped by along the way.

Oh, and I also managed to dredge up a large number of the daily video reports I made during the walk.

I have really fond memories of that adventure and would consider tackling it again with the right sponsorship. And I’ll wear better boots and avoid breaking my toe next time.

You can find them on YouTube, here 26

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Walk the Kingdom photo gallery

Me with Pete at my send-off in East Grinstead High Street

The day I reached Scotland

With the Lord Provost of Edinburgh

On a path by the River Humber

Some random photos I was lucky to find (God knows where the rest of them went - there were hundreds!)

Anyway, I’ve managed to find a fair number of the daily video reports I did and you can see them here

Also by the Humber (the bike isn’t mine - honest!)

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Work from Wilf’s (WfWs) is open every Wednesday between 10-2pm at St Wilfrid’s Hall in Horley.

WfWs was set up in order to help those who may be at home isolated, or unable to afford heating when working from home. It has become a wonderful meeting place and we invite others to join us. We serve good coffee and fresh cake.

Horley Community Choir has been meeting alongside WfWs, if you enjoy singing and would like to join in, come along and find out more.

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Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

V

French Recipe of the Month

Calling all the local community’s musicians, comedians, spoken word and other performers BUSK STOPS NOW OPEN FOR BOOKING!

This month I thought I’d share how to make a mayonnaise, something one cannot do without in France. This is how my mum used to make it and how I make it too. I will put it in English and French just for fun.

Find your place and add your voice to the Reigate Summer Festival, with busk stops throughout the town on Saturday and Sunday 21-22 June.

Save your place here: https:// reigatesummerfestival.co.uk/info/get-involved/

Ingredients/Ingrédients 1 egg yolk/1 jaune d’œuf A pinch of salt/une pincée de sel Some pepper/un peu de poivre A spoonful of Dijon mustard/une cuillerée de moutarde de Dijon A few drops of lemon juice/quelques gouttes de citron Vegetable or sunflower oil/huile végétale ou de tournesol, about 300ml/environ 300ml Separate the yolk and the white, keep the white aside for later to use in another recipe if you wish/Séparez le jaune du blanc d’œuf, gardez le blanc d’œuf pour l’utiliser plus tard si vous le désirez.

Put the yolk in a bowl and add a pinch of salt, some pepper and a few drops of lemon juice and mix with a fork/Mettez le jaune dans un bowl, ajoutez une pincée de sel et du poivre ainsi que quelques gouttes de jus de citron, mélangez à l’aide d’une fourchette.

Add the mustard and mix/Ajoutez la moutarde et mélangez.

Add a small amount of oil while mixing continuously/ ajoutez un filet d’huile en mélangeant continuellement.

You should have a thick mixture/le mélange devrait être épais.

Keep adding oil, a bit at time, mixing continuously/ Continuez d’ajouter l’huile, petit à petit, en mélangeant continuellement.

Taste it, add more salt, pepper or lemon juice to taste/ Goûtez, ajoutez un peu plus de sel, de poivre ou de jus de citron selon votre goût.

Et Voilà !

Goes well with chips, tuna, hard-boiled eggs, etc/ Accompagne bien les frites, le thon, les œufs cuits dur, etc.

Enjoy ! Bon appétit !

Dominique French translator and interpreter domicook64@gmail.com 29

Horley Town Crier Issue 4 May 2025

Farewell for now!

We hope you enjoyed this issue of the Town Crier.

The June issue is already under construction so please don’t miss out and get your submissions in early.

Browse www.towncrier.uk for more info and look out for Town Crier bulletins and updates.

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