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On the Cover Hearts In The Sand Big John & Miss Ann From Us To You Spotlight on Lee County Professional Directory Tank Together They Are The Divas What Is The Best Internet Service Heatstroke And Heat Stress Become More Self SufďŹ cient Pioneer Village - Lexington, texas Cancer Fighting Foods And Spices The Tatooed Stranger Backroads - Porches of the Past How To Bathe A Cat... Food & Water...So Vitally Important Dime Box Black Bridge Festival Strawberry Shortcake Memories & Forgiveness Small Town Law Enforcement The Sweeter Side Of Bitter Chocolate
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HEARTS IN THE SAND by Bob Clark
HEARTS IN THE SAND based worked nearlyas5a decades as a gypsy radio & TV personality by Bob Clark -Texas Texas based Bob Bob worked nearly 5 decades gypsy radio & TV personality from Puerto Rico Puerto to Oregon Rico from ________________________________________
to Oregon to name a few.
If thirty-two year old Eugene Pavelik had known how to find the beach community of Port Aransas, he never would have stopped for the scruffy hitchhiker on Highway 59. Dusk was rapidly waning and in the coming dark, he knew he'd be totally lost in the jumble of unfamiliar roads that led to his holiday hideaway. He needed help. In the rear view mirror of his five-year old Cadillac, he watched as the slightly built hitchhiker shuffled toward him. He was surprised at how much older the shabbily dressed man was than most guys who stick out their thumbs. The man was cradling a gray canvas gym bag in his arms and for a moment, the frightening thought of a possible weapon flitted through Eugene's mind. Before his hand made it to the door lock button, the older man tugged at the door handle and pulled it open. He slid onto the seat and unzipped the gym bag. "Hope you don't mind," he croaked in a voice that sounded as though his morning routine included gargling with broken glass and sandpaper. He pulled out a disheveled lump of hair with legs and plopped it on his lap. It was a small Terrier mix with a red kerchief around its neck. The mutt licked his master's hand once, closed his eyes, and settled into a snooze. "That's Toby. Been my only friend for the last eight years." When Eugene slipped on a weak smile, the man continued. "Say amigo, you wouldn't by any chance have some lunch leftovers, would you? Toby really could use something to munch on." Eugene looked at his new traveling companion. The man also sported a red kerchief around his neck and wore a black knit cap on his head. He appeared to need the leftovers as much as the dog. "Um, sorry. I ate at a Dairy Queen in Victoria a little while back. Cleaned my plate." The rider nodded and Eugene asked, "How far you going?" "Toby and me, we're going to the place I was born, Port Aransas." Eugene beamed. "What an amazing coincidence. That's where I'm headed. I have a week's vacation from my job in Houston and I have a reservation at Pirate's Cove Resort Condos. I'm sure glad I met you because I'm not sure how to get there." "How 'bout that?" The old man flashed a gap toothed grin as his weathered hand smoothed out a tangle in the dog's hair.
"A few miles up ahead in Refugio, you gotta get off Highway 77 and onto 2678. Tell you more later. Don't want to confuse you." The old man stared at the logo on the steering wheel and closed his eyes as if remembering something pleasant. "This a Caddy, huh? Reminds me of the time Elvis give me one." Eugene's mouth dropped open and he took his eyes off the road for a second. "Elvis Presley? He gave you a Cadillac?" "Yeah. Ugly color. Canary yellow as I remember. Sort of a goodbye present. One of his regular singers got deathly ill and I sang backup for him in Vegas for a few weeks. That was back when I sang and played harmonica for my supper. He wanted me to come to Nashville with him, but I turned him down." "Well, uh... what was he like?" "Good guy. One weakness though. Never met a fourteen or fifteen year oldlon that trip." "Wait a second. You say you sang with him?" The older man nodded. "Yeah. Hard to believe, huh? I didn't always sound like this, you know. Sinatra changed that." "You're pulling my leg aren't you?" "I worked Vegas when I was young. Met a lot of the big names. When I got a pickup gig from Sinatra's band leader, I guess I went nuts. Thought I had it made. Trouble was, I celebrated with a bottle of vodka before the show. Got so drunk, I embarrassed Frank on stage. After the show, he told Eddie, one of his boys to get rid of me. Frank told me later that he meant I should be fired, but Eddie misunderstood. Within minutes, I found my harmonica being forced down my throat. Frank's manager saw what was happening or I wouldn't be here now. Sinatra paid for the hospital and had a check for ten thousand dollars sent over to my room. Doctors said it was a busted larynx and ripped vocal cords." Eugene didn't know if the man was letting him in on real secrets of show business or inventing stories, but it was an entertaining way to spend time. "How did you make a living after that?" "I blew the ten thousand in no time and then I just started drifting like the sand on the beach where I was born." He paused for several seconds and when he spoke again, fatigue had crept into his voice. "I gotta go back there tonight before it's too late." After that, the man pulled his cap down and faced the window.
Except for the necessary directions he gave to Eugene, he kept silent. They made it to Aransas Pass, went over a bridge that spanned the Intercoastal Waterway and continued on to the free ferry that would connect the mainland to Port Aransas on Mustang Island. The old man drew in an audible breath and croaked, “I can smell it now.” He looked down at the dog. “So can Toby.” Indeed, noted Eugene, Toby was stirring. “What? What do you smell?” “It’s the sea. The salt air of the Gulf of Mexico. It’s good to be home.” In just five minutes, the ferry glided across the waters of the ship channel and Eugene said, “I guess we’re finally here. Where to now?” The older man nodded, chucked Toby under his hairy chin and said, “End of the line, little buddy.” He looked ahead through the windshield and cleared his throat. “The place you want is up ahead a couple of blocks, but I’d really appreciate it if you could take me just a little further to where I’m going.” Eugene followed the man’s simple directions and within minutes, the Caddy was on the Port Aransas city beach. Streetlights spaced out at two block intervals showed the hard packed sand that served as the road to where the old man wanted to go, the South Jetty. It was a line of jagged boulders that formed the building blocks of a quarter mile walkway into the waters of the Gulf. The car stopped only a few yards away from the jetty and the rider smiled. “You done good boy. That’s where I’ll be staying for the night.” On the opposite side of the jetty was the cut between Mustang Island and San Jose Island where the ocean going vessels exited Corpus Christi Bay. Eugene saw no shelter for the man. “You’re gonna stay there?” he asked. In response, the other man took off his knit cap and placed it on the gym bag. He slipped off the tattered and filthy sneakers he wore and scooped up the dog. Pushing open the door, he got out of the car and stepped over to the jetty. He suddenly stopped and placed the dog on a boulder so that he could use his hands to undo the belt holding up his pants and pull off his shirt. In an instant, the older man was naked.
"Hey!" Eugene shouted over the sound of the surf and the wind. What's going on here?" " This is it for me boy. Ain't going nowhere no more." He kissed the dog's forehead and held Toby out to the younger man. "Here, you hold him while I get down." Eugene took the dog as his rider eased himself down and took up a cross-legged position on the sand. "This here is the very spot where my mother gave birth to me. That night, my father was over there on the rocks fighting a fish for their meal. She suddenly went into labor and out I came no bigger than the fish he had on the line. They washed the sand off me with the sea water." He saw Eugene begin to gather up the discarded clothing and shook his head. "Don't bother, boy. I won't need them where I'm going. It's my ticker. Ain't got much power left. I'm going back where I came from dressed the way I was when I got here. You take Toby. He ain't fancy. Table scraps are OK with him." Eugene held onto the old man's clothing and approached the dog. "I don't feel right leaving you like this. It's not humane. It's not..." "Soon as you get to your resort hotel, you pick up the phone and call the cops. Let them take care of me." The older man coughed twice. His head slumped down and he took a shallow breath. After a pause, he brought his face up to look straight into Eugene’s eyes. “Nothing you can do for me now. Just go. Feed Toby.” Eugene backed away, the dog cradled in his arms. He sensed that the naked man had very little time left and that it was senseless to argue. When he got to the car, he placed Toby on the man’s cap. With a last look back, he drove away. As he left the sandy road for the paved streets, a thin, high-pitched noise from inside the car caught his attention. The warning lights on the dash were not lit. There was no visible indication of a malfunction so after two blocks, he pulled over and shut off the engine. The noise continued. As he opened the door to get out and check the engine, the dog stopped making the sound, took the knit cap into his teeth and jumped down from the seat onto the pavement. “Toby! Come back here. Toby!” he shouted as he saw the dog run off. He knew where the dog was going and also knew that the dog would be picked up when they got his call about the man at the jetty. He would go to the pound in a day or two and pick up the dog as if it was his own. He would feed Toby as the man had requested. Two days later, he found a small story about the hitchhiker on page two, section B of the local paper. It said that an unidentified nude man was found dead on the sand next to the South Jetty. The police found no indication of foul play and the authorities thought the man was a drifter who stripped because he wanted to cool off, but the effort was too much for his heart. One officer said that a small dog was found at the scene. He was also dead. The officer speculated, “Probably from malnutrition.” Eugene folded the newspaper and put it down on the table pool side at the Pirate’s Cove. The pretty girl who was serving him a cold drink was startled when he said, “They can call it malnutrition if they want. I know better. That dog died of a broken heart.”
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BIG JOHN
&
MISS ANN
T
his stately home located on Hempstead Street in Giddings, Texas, is owned by John and Ann Pieratt and is the feature for this first edition of the Lee County Front Porch Magazine. We would like to thank the Pieratt family for being a part of this premeire edition of the Lee County Front Porch Magazine. Built in the 1880s by Ed Sinks, attorney in Giddings, the first District Judge from Lee County, State Representative and Charter Director of the First National Bank. Mr. Sinks’ mother, Julia Sinks, came to Texas from Cincinnati, Ohio on the same boat with Sam Houston. Realizing she was living in historical times, she collected many original letters and documents from our founding fathers including Sam Houston. She also had the original document from Santa Anna’s surrender at San Jacinto. The documents can be viewed at the LBJ Library Complex in Austin. John grew up in Giddings and spent his summers working on his family ranch between Giddings and Dime Box. His father Bill Pieratt, served as State Representative for Lee, Burleson and Bastrop Counties. He served two terms beginning in 1959. John meet Ann in Austin. They married in 1982. They have 3 sons, Will, J. (married to Jessica) and Rob (married to Kathleen), along with 4 grandchildren, Madeline, Lucy, Frances and Conway, who all call them Miss Ann and Big John.
The Pieratts purchased their home from Pete and Therese Chamout in 2015. Petea pharmacist, was a talented carpenter and Therese was a master gardner. Together they restored the Sinks house and the garden. Ann and John continued the restoration of the house and of the garden. Both the Chamouts and the Pieratts were determined to save this historic home andmaintain the integrity of this beautiful residence. In 2014 tradegy struck... the Pieratt family experienced the loss of their 15 month old grandchild, Moss. He was the victim of Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood (SUDC). Moss’ parents, J. and Jessica Pieratt, joined with the SUDC Foundation and created the Moss Pieratt Foundation. The Foundation’s annual fundraiser, Moss Fest, is held the first weekend of March in conjunction with the Kite Fest at Zilker Park in Austin. This foundation raises money for SUDC research and so far they have raised enough to fund a researcher at NYU for 3 years..... this is only the beginning. This year, John and Ann applied to have their home designated as an official Texas Historic Landmark. The Sinks house has been approved and they are awaiting the plaque which will proudly be displayed on the home. Future plans for the Pieratt family include restoring the York House, built in the 1870s, and located across the street from the Sinks House. When finished, this will become John’s office.
F
rrom om us to you om
Editors Note
W
e are thrilled to introduce you to the premiere edition of the Lee County Front Porch Magazine.
We chose “The Front Porch” as the name for the magazine because not too long ago front porches were where friends and family gathered to discuss the news, told stories and jokes. In this magazine, you’ll find the advertisements for local businesses, along with our Chuckles, Giggles, & Snickers and the stories that focus on people, nutrition, history and faith. Many of our stories come from local writers. Every edition of the Front Porch Magazine will have a different theme. The theme we chose for this Edition is “Open the Door to Sustainable Living”. Do you want to start living a more sustainable life, but aren't sure how to start? Well, we've got some tips to set you on the right track…knowing where your food and water comes from, growing your own food, and organic and natural ways to enhance your health and well-being. It is our hope, dear readers, that you will be inspired by articles and think about how you are living your lives. We know that living each day as a healthier person will enrich your life. Thank you for taking the time to read, laugh, cry or learn something new. We are looking forward to a long relationship between you, our readers and advertisers and the Lee County Front Porch Magazine. Sincerely, Sandi Balcar, Editor Whitney Faske, Advertising Manager
S
potlight on
Lee County’s
Unique Heritage
People in all walks of life influence those around them. In this column, we will be featuring those who have made an impact in our small towns.
Hattie Schautschick Known as the Noodle Lady
Hattie Schautschick was born in the 1920s in Serbin, Texas. Her parents, Johnny and Louise Mitschke were farmers of corn, cotton and peanuts. Although they were members of the Serbin Church, Hattie went to school at Warda Lutheran Church because she had to walk to school and it was closer. Hattie says, “Life was especially hard during World War II because there were no men to help with the farm work. Fields had to be plowed, planted, cultivated and harvested by hand. We worked sun up to sun down. But there was no need to complain...the work had to be done.” In addition to working in the fields, Hattie and her sister also worked for the neighbor for $.50 a day. By the end of the season
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they had earned $13. This money allowed them to buy a coat, shoes, stockings and enough material to make a dress for each of them... and they still had money left over. After Hattie married, she and her carpenter husband moved to Houston. While living there she worked at different factories, including Coca-Cola, where she learned to run different machines. When she returned to Giddings, she worked at the now closed boat factory. After retiring, Hattie found her true calling....making noodles. Using her mother’s recipe she started making noodles with the Heritage Society in 1992, and has been eating the noodles her entire life. ‘We always had noodles on Sunday...fried chicken and noodles.” Hattie remembers. In the society’s kitchen, Hattie is the lead on the team. She loves going to the museum every Monday and Wednesday, spending time with her team and making something special to keep traditions alive. At 90 years of age, Hattie has had many setbacks, but says “there is no reason to stop, you just have to keep going. As long as the Lord lets me, I’ll continue making noodles and doing as much as I can every day!”
Traditional Wendish Noodles Courtesy of Texas Wendish Heritage Society
5 c. broth (chicken or beef) or water 1 stick butter 1/2 lb. Wendish noodles Chopped parsley, to garnish (optional) Bring the broth or water to a rolling boil, add the butter and then the noodles. Cook for 10 minutes. Add chopped parsley, and serve.
professional directory Ag & Land Lender Capital Farm Credit Chamber of Commerce Giddings Chamber of Commerce Cleaners Siena Dry Cleaners Copies-Printing ImageMaker Convenience Store K&C Cosmetics Seacret Dozer Faske’s Custom Work Electrical Service Stevensons Electric Feed Faust Farms Grimm Feeds Financial Trivent Financial Firearms-Ammunitation-Knives Tejas Trading Post Health Becky Weise-Young Living Household Wares Gourmet Divas Insurance Germania Insurance Livestock Commission Caldwell Livestock Commission
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Lexington Livestock Commission Lumber Company Goodson-Voight Museum Texas Wendish Newspaper Fayette County Record Pest Control Armstrong Pesticide Solutions Photography Conni Diane Ida Schuman Whitney Faske Racing Cotton Bow Speedway Real Estate Home and Ranch Real Estate Listings Home and Ranch Restaurants City Meat Market Giddings Downtown Restaurant Los Patrones Grill Reba’s Diner Sawmill Lamont Custom Sawmill Service Clubs Dime Box Lions Club Sports Pitching Lessons Tractors-Supplies-Parts Paige Tractors
17 SANDI BALCAR 25
PUBLISHER
SANDI BALCAR
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LAYOUT & DESIGN EDITOR
35
SALES AND MARKETING
15
SCHUMAN PHOTOGRAPHY
WHITNEY FASKE
PHOTOGRAPHER
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CONTRIBUTING WRITERS
DOUG BOX BOB CLARK SUZY COHEN CONNI DIANE WHITNEY FASKE TRUDY HOLLAND JACK MCKEMIE, DVM SHERIFF RODNEY MEYER CHRIS NIETUBICZ ROGER TURNER Phone 979.567.7871 979.540.7168 301 Hwy 21 E Caldwell, TX 77836 www.leecountyfrontporch.com The contents of all articles do not represent the views of the Front Porch Magazine. The magazine claims no responsibility for the accuracy of information or content.
They told me the big black Lab's name was Reggie, as I looked at him lying in his pen. The shelter was clean, no-kill, and the people really friendly. I'd only been in the area for six months, but everywhere I went in the small college town, people were welcoming and open, even waving as I passed them on the street. But something was still missing as I attempted to settle in to my new life here, and I thought a dog couldn't hurt. And I had just seen Reggie's advertisement on the local news. The shelter said they had received numerous calls right after, but they said the people who had come down to see him just didn't look like "Lab people," They must've thought I did. But at first, I thought the shelter had misjudged me in giving me Reggie and his things, a dog pad, bag of toys and many brand new tennis balls, his dishes and a sealed letter from his previous owner. See, Reggie and I didn't really hit it off when we got home. We struggled for two weeks (as long as the shelter told me to give him to adjust to his new home). Maybe it was the fact that I was trying to adjust, too. Were we too much alike? I saw the sealed envelope. I had completely forgotten about that. "Okay, Reggie," I said out loud, "let's see if your previous owner has any advice." To Whomever Gets My Dog: Well, I can't say that I'm happy you're reading this, a letter I told the shelter could only be opened by Reggie's new owner. I'm not even happy writing it. So let me tell you about my Lab in the hopes that it will help you bond with him and he with you. First, he loves tennis balls. The more the merrier. Sometimes I think he's part squirrel, the way he hoards them. He usually always has two in his mouth, and he tries to get a third in there. Hasn't done it yet. Doesn't matter where you throw them, he'll bound after them, so be careful. Don't do it by any roads. Next, commands. Reggie knows the obvious ones --- "sit," "stay," "come," "heel." He knows hand signals, too: He knows "ball" and "food" and "bone" and "treat" like nobody's business. Feeding schedule: twice a day, regular store-bought stuff; the shelter has the brand. He's up on his shots. Be forewarned: Reggie hates the vet. Good luck getting him in the car. I don’t know how he knows when it's time to go to the vet, just knows. Finally, give him some time. It's only been Reggie and me for his whole life. He's gone everywhere with me, so please include him on your daily car rides. He sits well in the backseat, and he doesn't bark or complain. He just loves to be around people, me most especially. And that's why I need to share one more bit of info with you ... His name's NOT Reggie. I just couldn't bear to give them his real name. But if someone is reading this... well it means that his new owner
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should know his real name. His real name is "Tank." Because, that is what I drive. I told the shelter that they couldn't make "Reggie" available for adoption until they received word from my company commander. You see, my parents are gone, I have no siblings, no one to leave Tank with ... and it was my only real request of the Army upon my deployment to Iraq, that they make one phone call to the shelter ... in the "event" ... to tell them that Tank could be put up for adoption. Luckily, my CO is a dog-guy, too, and he knew where my platoon was headed. He said he'd do it personally. And if you're reading this, then he made good on his word. Tank has been my family for six years, almost as long as the Army has been my family. And now I hope and pray that you make him part of your family, too, and that he will adjust and come to love you the same way he loved me. If I have to give up Tank to keep those terrible people from coming to the US, I am glad to have done so. I hope I honored him by my service to my country and comrades. All right, that's enough. I deploy this evening and have to drop this letter off at the shelter. Maybe I'll peek in on him and see if he finally got that third tennis ball in his mouth. Good luck with Tank. Give him a good home, and give him an extra kiss goodnight - every night - from me. Thank you, Paul Mallory I folded the letter and slipped it back in the envelope. Sure, I had heard of Paul Mallory, everyone in town knew him, even new people like me. Local kid, killed in Iraq a few months ago and posthumously earning the Silver Star when he gave his life to save three buddies. Flags had been at half-mast all summer. Staring at the dog, I quietly said, “Hey, Tank" The dog's head whipped up, his ears cocked and his eyes bright. "C'mere boy." He was instantly on his feet, his nails clicking on the hardwood floor. He sat in front of me, his head tilted, searching for the name he hadn't heard in months. "Tank," I whispered. His tail swished. I kept whispering his name, over and over, and each time, his ears lowered, his eyes softened, and his posture relaxed as a wave of contentment just seemed to flood him. I stroked his ears, rubbed his shoulders, buried my face into his scruff and hugged him. "It's me now, Tank, just you and me. Your old pal gave you to me." Tank reached up and licked my cheek. "So whatdaya say we play some ball?" His ears perked again. "Yeah? Ball? You like that? Ball?" Tank tore from my hands and disappeared into the next room. And when he came back, he had three tennis balls in his mouth. If you can read this without getting a lump in your throat or a tear in your eye, you just ain't right. A veteran is someone who, at one point, wrote a blank check made payable to 'The United States of America' for an amount of 'up to and including their life.' That is Honor, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it. "The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him."
This is one of those stories in which the facts don’t add up, but it still could be true...especially if you want it to be.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Unanswered Prayers The preacher’s 5 year-old daughter noticed that her father always paused and bowed his head for a moment before starting his sermon. One day, she asked him why. “Well, Honey,” he began, proud that his daughter was so observant of his messages. “I’m asking the Lord to help me preach a good sermon.” “How come He doesn’t answer it?” she asked.
She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break, and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops. She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands. “Good Heavens,” said the horrified teacher. “What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?” “Stay away from Mommy when she’s been drinking.” Police Officer and The Kid
The Woman Marine Pilot The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular types of stuff; spilled milk and pennies saved. But then the teacher realized, much to her dismay, that only Janie was left. Janie, do you have a story to share?” “Yes ma’am my daddy told me a story about my Mommy. She was a Marine pilot in Desert Storm, and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory, and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife.
The police officer got out of his car and the kid, who was stopped for speeding, rolled down his window. “I’ve been waiting for you all day,” the police said. The kid replied, “Well, I got here as fast as I could.” When the officer finally stopped laughing, he send the kid on his was without a ticket. Mad Cow Disease There were these two cows, chatting over the fence between their fields. The first cow said, “I tell you, this mad cow disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm.” The other cow replies, “I ain’t worried, it don’t affect us ducks.”
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Peppy . Fun Loving Together they are the
Divas
I
t was Christmas Eve and a man came in and started hauling in all the gifts he had bought that day from other stores and was so happy they offered gift wrapping. The Divas wrapped his gifts, and said Merry Christmas. You see, Gourmet Divas only offers gift wrapping services for items purchased in their store. But this small gesture of kindness shows you the love and Christmas spirit they display all year long. Linda Pruitt, owner of Gourmet Divas has had a love of “going to market” for years. There she fell in love with dishes from Inspired Generations and that is when she knew she would bring this to Giddings. The year was 2016. Linda’s assistants, Chandra Williams and Jaime Manning, share Linda’s love of beauty and community. They have helped her since day 1. Gourmet Divas offers top of the line cookware along with cooking classes that started in January 2017. The classes give people a chance to learn something unique while coming together and having fun. They share a love for cooking and getting folks in the kitchen. Located at 721 E Austin Street in Giddings, Texas, this unique shop with it’s inviting decor welcomes all who enter. The divas want you to feel like you walked into your best friends home to make the best food ever. Here you will find food items purchased locally or from nearby Central Texas, along with top quality cookware, i.e. USA Pan, Nordic Ware, All Clad, Fiesta, Green Pan, Paleo Powder, and Salt Rox. They also carry an array of quality utensils and gadgets. The three Divas have big plans for the future...coffee bar, outdoor wine and cheese bar, and entertaining small private parties. They are always looking for ways to bring people together. Linda’s heart lies in her community as evidenced by her many contributions and willingness to always extend a helping hand.
Cooking with the Divas 721 E Austin St., Giddings, TX 78942 979-540-3482 (DIVA) 14
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Retiree Humor An eldery gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, “Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.” The gentleman replied, “Oh, I haven’t told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I’ve changed my will three times!” *********************** Cream Loses It’s Magic Little Michael watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face.’ Why do you do that, Mummy?’ he asked ‘To make myself beautiful’, said his mother who then began removing the cream with a tissue. ‘What’s the matter?’ asked little Michael, ‘Giving up?’
*********************** The Ten Commandments A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to “honor thy father and they mother, she asked “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without missing a beat one little boy answered, “Thou shall not kill.” ************************ Biting Nails Two golden-agers were discussing their husbands over tea. “I do wish that my Elmer would stop biting his nails. He makes me terribly nervous.” “My Billy used to do the same thing,” the older woman replied. “But I broke him of the habit.” “How?” “I hid his teeth.”
When one door closes, sometimes you want to get a hammer and nails and make sure that it stays shut.
What is the Best Internet Service? Wired or Wireless? Faced with the various types of Internet connections, from the traditional dial-up access to the many different broadband options, Internet users are probably asking, which is the best for me? “The answer really depends on the user’s priorities and needs” says Robert Zoch, President of ZochNet and ZochNet Cable. “Also, because some of the high-speed options are available only in certain locations, this will play an important role in selection.” he added. It used to be Internet speeds needed only to be fast enough to send and receive email. Yet with more people using digital devices than ever, those needs have changed. The time you spend waiting for a webpage to appear, the speed at which that YouTube or Netflix video will load on your TV or computer, without it pausing countless times is determined by how much data your Internet connection can transmit at any one time. That capacity is also called bandwidth, which is measured in units of data called bits, or better known as speed. Residents must decide their internet usage and understand what amount of speed that they need; Lee and Burleson County residents have options to get anywhere from 1mbps to 200mbps, depending on the type of service available in their location, here are the types of residential services: TYPES OF RESIDENTIAL INTERNET SERVICE DSL: Digital subscriber line service, such as from AT&T, uses copper phone lines to deliver Internet service. Speeds may be slower if the home or business is far from a telephone hub. Cable: Providers such as ZochNet Cable use the same coaxial cables as your television service. Users can use the Internet and watch TV at the same time. Fixed wireless: Service is delivered via microwaves sent from the provider’s facility to receivers attached to homes, ranches and businesses. Heavy tree cover or hills may make locations unsuitable for fixed wireless. Mobile wireless: Uses the same technology used for cell phone service, such as 4G. It is typically slower than wired or fixed wireless options. Providers; such as Verizon, may impose caps on how much data you use and charge a premium for going above that level. Satellite: Is available in very rural and remote areas, as long as the location has a clear line of sight to the satellite. Bad weather
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can interrupt service. Service typically has data usage limits. One of the leading internet service providers in Lee and Burleson County is ZochNet; a Fixed Wireless Internet Service Provider, as well as a Cable Operator in the communities of Lexington, Birch Creek and Somerville. If a ZochNet customer was in an area that could be serviced with either Cable or Fixed Wireless service, they would recommend their Cable most of the time, because it can deliver a more consistent download speed of 10-200 mbps and is less susceptible to weather. As one Lee County resident had posted to their home blog said: “My suggestion for all those living in the country looking for the best Internet provider, is to find a responsible local provider that knows his craft and has the integrity to run the Internet business like it should be. Ask the questions and do the research, leave no stone unturned! Richard and Mariah. by Roger Turner
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers The Coyote Principle California * The Governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the Governor’s dog, then bites the Governor. * The Governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie “Bambi” and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural. * He calls animal control. Animal Control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it. * He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the State $200 testing it for diseases. * The Governor goes to hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and on getting his bite wound bandaged. * The running trail gets shut down for 6 months while Fish & Game conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals. * The Governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a “coyote awareness program” for residents of the area. * The State Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world. * The Governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training regarding the nature of coyotes. * PETA protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state. TEXAS * The Governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks his dog. * The Governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging. The Governor has spent $1.50 on a .45 ACP hollow point cartridge. * The buzzards eat the dead coyote. And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.
A person who demands further gun control legislation is like a chicken who roots for Colonel Sanders.
HEATSTROKE AND HEAT STRESS by Jack F. McKemie, DVM
Summer is here, so today I would like to discuss animal thermoregulatory methods and a few common sense things to prevent heat stress and stroke in animals. Canines, rabbits and felines primarily displace heat through evaporative cooling during the breathing and panting process. Livestock like horses and cattle displace heat through sweating and evaporative cooling/breathing process. Thus livestock typically accommodate for excessive heat more efficiently than pets, but that does not make livestock immune to the effects of our brutal summers. All animals have a thermoregulatory center in the brain that keeps body core temperature with its set reference range for that animal. Once body core temperatures increase, the animal will compensate by panting, drooling, sweating and if that is not sufficient, blood vessels will dilate channeling blood from vital organs to the skin for a less efficient radiated cooling process. Heatstroke is defined as a condition of hyperthermia resulting in the body’s inability to dissipate heat due to metabolic, exercise, environmental or a combination of the above processes. Typically, once the body core temperatures increases above 106 degrees in most species, peripheral vasodilation, hypotension, shock and organ damage begin. If body core temperatures increase above 108 to 110 degrees, organ damage has begun and death can occur in minutes. In this community, I see canine and equine cases of heatstroke the most. Dogs can have strokes for a variety of reasons, medical conditions like laryngeal paralysis, Brachycephalic airway (smashed or short face dogs), and heart disease. Hog hunting dogs, even working at night, can also overheat and die very easily due to a combination of heat and humidity. Horses can have medical conditions such as heaves (COPD), laryngeal paralysis (Roarer) and heart disease that can lead to hyperthermia and death. A horse can lose up to 4 gallons of water per hour during strenuous riding in hot and/or humid conditions, so it is imperative to allow these animals to rest rehydrate and cool themselves periodically. Heat Stress is a less recognizable but real syndrome experienced by pets and livestock. Consider you being subjected to temperatures over 90 degrees with 90% humidity day after day without shade or relief. This kind of stress will cause cortisol release thus weakening an animal’s immune system, making them more susceptible to disease and shorting their life span, not to mention making their life miserable. Heat stress will cause measurable losses in livestock production and performance if the producer is not managing it properly. Both heat stress and stroke can be prevented by following a few normal precautions in the care of your pet and livestock husbandry. Obese , older and pets with pre-existing medical conditions should have special accommodations; shade, fans, water tubs or left indoors in the A/C. Livestock should not be worked in the heat of the day, have ample shade, be allowed to rest when stressed and have access to ample fresh water. FRESH WATER is probably one of the most important and easiest management practices you
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can do as a pet or livestock owner. Water should be cool and fresh. Change out your pet’s water daily and have a water trough available to livestock in addition to that muddy stock tank. PLEASE DO PUT A BLACK WATER TROUGH IN DIRECT SUNLIGHT. The water temperature will increase well over normal atmospheric temperature, thus decreasing intake. Would you want to drink 140 degree water when it’s 100 degrees outside?? If you suspect your pet is having heat stroke, there are some very important things to do. #1 Get the animal into shade without excessive stress. #2 Cool the animal with NORMAL TAP WATER, NEVER USE ICE WATER. Concentrate on back, neck, groin and under arm areas. Offer water for drinking, consuming small to moderate amounts over 30 minutes. #3 Never force water down an animal’s mouth, you may drown them or cause aspiration pneumonia. #4 Get a fan and start blowing it directly on the pet. #5 Monitor the animal’s rectal temperature with a thermometer. Once the animal’s temperature reaches 102.5 degrees decrease cooling measures or stop them. Rapid but controlled cooling is very important, once your animal has reached a core body temperature under 102.5 degrees, access their mentation. If the animal is still depressed or poorly responsive, vomiting, having diarrhea, trouble breathing or unable to stand and drink water on its own, transport to a veterinary hospital. If your animal’s core body temperature was over 108 degrees for any length of time, transport to a veterinary hospital. Mortality rate for these animal are 50% or more and your animal may need aggressive care at a referral hospital like Texas A&M veterinary hospital. In conclusion, with a little common sense you can increase your pet’s quality of life, life span and productivity of livestock by putting yourself in their place. Make special considerations for animals with medical conditions, plenty of fresh/cool CLEAN WATER, fans to aid in evaporative cooling, shade and do not over work or stress livestock during the heat of the day especially with our humidity.
Being self sufficient is comforting. Knowing where your food comes from, knowing that you will be saving money, knowing that if things get tough you aren’t going to starve, and knowing that you are helping the environment are all comforting feelings to have. The first place I started was in a small garden. There is nothing better than a fresh, home grown tomato or a bucket-full of bright red potatoes. My wife loves decorating with pumpkins, and they grow well even in a flowerbed. And if you are like my son and his wife, you may yield many veggies that you can provide to family and neighbors and have plenty left over to preserve for the winter. Another simple step towards sustainability is growing a few fruit and nut trees. Your local co-op, garden or big box store will have several varieties available. Another category is back yard animals. If you have a large yard or some acreage you can raise a few chickens for fresh eggs. All you need is a small permanent coop or a movable chicken tractor. I raised two dozen guineas to help keep down the bugs; they love eating harmful scorpions, ticks and grasshoppers, and seem to scare the snakes away. If you are one of many with a few or more acres out in the country you may also raise your very own grass-fed beef and create a stock tank that can double as a fish farm. Fresh fish, grass-fed beef, your own brown eggs and home raised vegetables, and I think you are on your way to sustainability and self sufficiency. Anyone can add a rain barrel and start collecting water for your garden and flowerbed, or even use for back up drinking water. With only one inch of rain, you will collect .6 gallons per square foot of roof space! Just make sure you use screen wire over the intake to keep the mosquito problem in check. Other simple, yet exciting ideas to consider while on your quest for self sufficiency are starting a compost pile, making your own
soap and laundry detergent. Nothing is better for your plants than fresh compost that is pesticide free. Besides not only saving you money, making your own soap products can also be an enjoyable way to make for gifts for friends and family or even as a small business-more and more people these days are demanding such chemical free products. Perhaps one of the most significant steps towards self sustainability is utilizing your own solar power. Harness an ever-present source of energy that is created by the sun and convert that energy to electricity to run your household! Solar costs have been coming down and the energy output from panel systems has increased so much that now is the time to invest in solar. Let’s realize that we will likely pay an electric bill to someone for the rest of our lives. However, having your own solar panels can cut your electric bill in half or even more, and it actually doesn’t cost you a penny up front! I added solar panels to our house and it is by far the best investment that I have made in a long time. Your very own solar panels will produce electricity whenever the sun is shining and many of the electric companies will give you credit for the power you create, which is called Net Metering. Plus, there is a recently renewed 30% Federal Income Tax credit to of take advantage of to reduce the initial costs of your solar system. Written by Doug Box whose interest in sustainability and natural systems started in the early 70’s when he added a homemade wood heating system to the split level home he built in Brenham, Texas. He worked in the Heating and Air Conditioning field and learned about electrical controls while working for General Packaging Company. In 1979 he started his professional photography business. Photography got Doug interested in studying, measuring and controlling light. In 1994 Doug moved his home and photography studio to the family farm outside Caldwell, TX. He began to add facilities and operations to harmonize with natural systems for his home based photography business and every day living needs for himself and his family. He started including Permaculture principals in his life and homestead. In addition to 4 small lakes, an oak forest, natural grasses, wild flowers, organic garden area, water harvesting and free-range chicken/ guinea space, Doug has added Solar Power to his home. When Doug retired as Executive Director of the Texas Professional Photographers Association after 22 years in the position, he opened Texas Sustainable Solar with his step-son Sam.
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+,6725< Pioneer Village Lexington, Texas by Trudy Holland President of the Board
It was 1976 and the small town of Lexington was looking for a Bicentennial Project. Two log cabins were found in the area and through the donations from the community and even school children with their pennies and nickels, the cabins were to be moved to city property on the Lexington Square. With the help of volunteers and students from the school AG classes, the cabins were taken apart and put together in what became known as Pioneer Village. One cabin was a dogtrot cabin built by George Washington Guthrie and his wife, Permelia, approximately three miles northwest of Lexington on the Old Belton Road. This cabin was set up
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with a permanent exhibit of a pioneer kitchen and bedroom. The single room cabin was built near Tanglewood by Major Ephraim Roddy. It was sold to Wiley Fowler in the 1870’s. This cabin houses temporary exhibits. Later a corncrib from the Blue area and a portion of the jail that had housed infamous killer Bill Longley were moved to the complex. The corncrib stores 19th century tools and implements. After a few years Pioneer Village met with neglect and had to be closed. By 2000 a board of directors was established and memberships were gathered to help repair and reopen the Log Cabins. It is now known as the Lexington Log Cabins. Later a building was built to store artifacts, office equipment and room for membership meetings. This building is known as the Heritage Center. This year another building is being added for a ca. 1940 replica of Lexington complete with model railroad built by the late Jerry Poston of Lexington. The board of directors is working hard to complete this building and get the replica ready for exhibit. The Lexington Log Cabins and Heritage Center are available for tours from 9 to 4 on Thursday through Saturday. Group tours can be arranged with costumed docents and demonstrations of pioneer activities by calling 979-773-8400 or Board President, Trudy Holland, at 979-773-2673.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut . The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest’s breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, ‘Sir, have you been drinking?’ ‘Just water,’ says the priest. The trooper says, ‘Then why do I smell wine?’ The priest looks at the bottle and says, ‘Good Lord! He’s done it again!’
Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender, ‘Pour me a stiff one - just had another fight with the little woman.’ ‘Oh yeah?’ said Charlie, ‘And how did this one end?’ ‘When it was over,’ Mike replied, ‘She came to me on her hands and knees.’ ‘Really,’ said Charles, ‘Now that’s a switch! What did she say?’ She said, ‘Come out from under the bed, you little chicken.’
A woman went to a doctors’ office and was seen by one of the new doctors. But after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped her and asked her what the problem was, and when she explained, he had her sit down and relax in another room. The older doctor marched back to the first and demanded.... ‘What’s the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was PREGNANT??’ The new doctor smiled smugly as he continued to write on his clipboard. “Cured her hiccups though, didn’t I?”
Cancer Fighting Foods and Spices The National Cancer institute estimates that roughly one-third of all cancer deaths may be diet related. What you eat can hurt you, but it can also help you. Many of the common foods contain cancer-fighting properties, from the antioxidants that neutralize the damage caused by free radicals to the powerful phytochemicals that scientists are exploring. The following foods have the ability to help stave off cancer and some even help inhibit cancer cell growth or reduce tumor size. Avocados are powerful antioxidants that attack free radicals in the body. They supply more potassium than bananas and supply beta-carotene, believed to be useful in treating viral hepatitis, a cause of liver cancer, and other sources of liver damage. Broccoli, cabbage, and cauliflower have indole-3-carbinol that can combat breast cancer by converting a cancer-promoting estrogen into a more protective variety. Broccoli, especially sprouts, also have phytochemicals, believed to aid in preventing some types of cancer, like colon and rectal. Carrots contain a lot of beta carotene, which may help reduce a wide range of cancers, including lung, mouth, throat, stomach, intestine, bladder, prostate and breast, according to the Danish Institute of Agricultural Sciences. Carrots should be eaten raw. Chili pepper and jalapenos contain a chemical, capsaicin, that may neutralize certain cancer-causing substances (nitrosamines) and may help prevent cancers such as stomach cancer. Cruciferous vegetables- broccoli, cauliflower, kale, Brussels sprouts and cabbage contain two antioxidants, lutein and zeaxanthin which may help decrease prostate and other cancers. Figs apparently have a derivative of benzaldehyde, tested and found highly effective in shrinking tumors. Figs contain vitamins A and C and calcium, magnesium and potassium, and may curtail appetite and improve weight loss. Garlic has immune-enchancing allium compounds (dialyl sultides) that appear to increase the activity of immune cells that fight cancer and indirectly help break down cancer causing substances. These help block carcinogens from entering cells and slow tumor development.
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Grapefruits, like oranges and other citrus fruits, are believed to help prevent cancer by sweeping carcinogens out of the body. Some studies show that they may inhibit the proliferation of breast-center cells in vitro. Grapes, red contain bioflavonoids, powerful antioxidants that work as cancer preventives. They are also a rich source of resveratrol, which inhibits the enzymes that can stimulate cancercell growth and suppress immune response. Mushrooms appear to help the body fight cancer and build the immune system-Shitake, maitake, reishi, Agaricus blazei Murill and Coriolus Versicolor. These mushrooms contain polysaccharides, esp. Lentinan, powerful compounds that help build immunity. Nuts contain the antioxidants quercetin and campferol that may suppress the growth of cancers. Brazil nut contains 80 micrograms of selenium, which is important for those with prostate cancer. (A word of caution: many people are allergic to the proteins in nuts, so watch for symptoms such as itchy mouth, tight throat, wheezing, etc after eating nuts. If any symptoms occur, stop eating nuts.) Papayas have vitamin C that works as an antioxidant and may also reduce absorption of cancer-causing nitrosamines from the soil or processed foods.
Cooking Broccoli Steam it on the stove, not in the microwave. Stovecooked foods contain up to 22% fewer immunityweakening pesticides; the longer these hazardous compounds are exposed to heat, the more they’re broken down.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Airline Humor Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the “in-flight safety lecture” and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported: Pilot - “Folks, we have reached our cruising altitude now, so I am going to switch the seat belt sign off. Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stay inside the plane till we land ... it’s a bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings it affects the flight pattern.” And from the pilot during his welcome message: “We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry ...Unfortunately none of them are on this flight...! After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the Flight Attendant came on with, “Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Captain Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt up against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we’ll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal. Another flight Attendant’s comment on a less than perfect landing: “We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal.” An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the Passengers exited, smile, and give them a “Thanks for flying our airline.” He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, “Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?” “Why, no, Ma’am,” said the pilot. “What is it?” The little old lady said, “Did we land, or were we shot down?” And, after landing: “Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.”
Why Seniors Still Need Newspapers I was visiting my granddaughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper. “This is the 21st century,” she said. “I don’t waste money on newspapers. Here, use my iPad.” I can tell you this. That fly never knew what hit him.
The Tatooed Stranger
He was kind of scary. He sat there on the sidewalk with his cardboard sign, his adorable dog and tattoos running up and down both arms and even on his neck. His sign proclaimed him to be “stuck and hungry” and to please help. I’m such a soft touch for anyone needing help. My husband both hates and loves this quality in me. I pulled the van over and in my rearview mirror contemplated this man, tattoos and all. He was youngish, maybe forty and he wore a stripped cap on his head. Anyone could see he was dirty and had a scraggly beard. But if you looked closer you could see that he had neatly tucked in the black T-shirt, and his things were in a small, tidy bundle. Nobody was stopping for him. I could see the other drivers take one look and immediately focus on something else — anything else. It was so hot out. I could see in the man’s very blue eyes how dejected and tired and worn out he felt. The sweat was tricking down his face. As I sat with the air- conditioning blowing, the Scripture suddenly popped into my head. “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto the least of these, my brethren, so ye have done it unto me.” I reached down into my purse and extracted a $10 bill. My 12-year-old son, Nick, knew right away what I was doing. “Can I take it to him, Mom?” “Be careful, honey,” I warned and handed him the money. I watched in the mirror as he rushed over to the man, and with a shy smile, handed it to him. I saw the man, startled, stand and take the money, putting it into his back pocket. “Good,” I thought to myself, “now he will at least have a hot meal tonight.” I felt satisfied, proud of myself. I had made a sacrifice and now I could go on with my errands. When Nick got back into the car, he looked at me with sad, pleading eyes. “Mom, his dog looks so hot and the man is really nice.” I knew I had to do more. “Go back and tell him to stay there, that we will be back in 15 minutes,” I told Nick. He bounded out of the van and ran to tell the tattooed stranger.
We then ran to the nearest store and bought our gifts carefully. “It can’t be too heavy,” I explained to the children. “He has to be able to carry it around with him.” We finally settled on our purchases. A bag of dog food, a flavored chew toy shaped like a bone, some doggie snacks, two bottles of water (one for him and one for the dog), a water dish and some people snacks for the man. We rushed back to the spot where we had left him and there he was, still waiting. And still nobody else had stopped for him. With hands shaking, I grabbed our bags and climbed out of the car, all 4 of my children following me, each carrying gifts. As we walked up to him, I had a fleeting moment of fear, hoping he wasn’t a serial killer. I looked into his eyes and saw something that startled me and made me ashamed of my judgment. I saw tears. He was fighting like a little boy to hold back his tears. How long had it been since someone showed this man kindness? I told him I hoped it wasn’t too heavy for him to carry and showed him what we had bought. He just stood there, like a child at Christmas, and I felt like my small contributions were so inadequate. When I took out the water dish, he snatched it out of my hands as if it were solid gold and told me he had no way to give his dog water. He gingerly set it down, filled it with the bottled water we brought, and stood up to look directly into my eyes. His were so blue, so intense, and my own filled with tears as he said, “Ma’am, I don’t know what to say.” He then put both hands on his bandanna-clad head and just started to cry. This man, this “scary” man, was so gentle, so sweet, so humble. I smiled through my tears and said, “Don’t say anything.” Then I noticed the tattoo on his neck. It said, “Mama tried.” As we all piled into the van and drove away, he was on his knees, arms around his dog, kissing his nose and smiling. I waved cheerfully and then finally broke down in tears. I have so much. My worries seem so trivial and petty now. I have a home, a loving husband and four beautiful children. I have a bed. I wondered where he would sleep tonight. My stepdaughter Brandie turned to me and said in the sweetest little-girl voice, “I feel so good.” Although it seemed as if we had helped him, the man with the tattoos gave us a gift that I will never forget. He taught that no matter what the outside looks like, inside each of us is a human being deserving of kindness, of compassion, of acceptance. He opened his heart. Tonight and every night I will pray for the gentle man with the tattoos and his dog. And I will hope that God will send more people like him into my life to remind me what’s really important. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? 1 John 3:17
Backroads - Porches of the Past Change Isn’t Always A Good Thing by Conni Diane I’ve always been in favor of change, or so I thought, but there are some things just are meant to be left alone. I have unknowingly passed this abandoned house many times during the years, but obviously not in the winter time when the trees and bushes surrounding it were bare of their leaves, leaving it in plain view and a temptation to explore. There are times when I can locate someone who knows the history of an abandoned home, and I was lucky enough to find out the history of this house. There was an elderly lady who never married and had no children who lived in this home for most of her life. I was told it never had indoor plumbing (only a water well located nearby). This woman had been somewhat of a hermit - she didn’t have many friends other than an elderly woman and her husband who lived in the next town, and they checked on her regularly. Over the years (about 25+ years ago), her friend died, and shortly thereafter the husband died, so she was pretty much all alone. I’m told she was healthy enough to take care of herself, however, a concerned neighbor decided someone should check on her and contacted the State. They made the decision that she wasn’t in a position to care for herself although she had been there for many years and was doing fine. They removed this very unhappy elderly lady from her home and checked her into a State nursing home where they could make sure she was cared for. She died after just two days of living in the nursing home. I guess she missed her home so much that she decided she didn’t want to live anywhere else.
How To Bathe A Cat... As anyone who has attempted this feat can tell you, bathing a cat is no laughing matter. In fact, it can be downright painful, and humiliating too. But don’t despair. Bathing a cat is simple, really. No, just kidding. But it can be done. You can succeed. The key is to be properly prepared, mentally and physically. Remember, although your cat has advantages in intelligence, speed and total lack of concern for you, you will have advantages in size, strength, and the ability to wear protective garments. Follow these instructions for bathing your cat. 1. First, dress for the occasion. A four-ply rubber wet suit is recommended, along with a helmet, face mask and welders gloves. 2. A bathtub with a glass enclosure is preferred to the one with a shower curtain. A frenzied cat can shred a shower curtain in about 3.5 seconds. 3. Place the Kitty Bubbles and towel in the enclosed bathtub area before you begin. No need for the blow dryer. As tempting as it might be, blow drying the cat after a bath is most definitely not recommended. 4. Fill the tub with water. Make it a little warmer than necessary because you still have to find the cat. Position everything strategically in the shower, so that you can reach it even if you are prone or face down in the tub. 5. Find your cat. Use the element of surprise. Pick the cat up nonchalantly, as if you were simply carrying him to the supper dish. No need to worry about the cat noticing your strange attire, because the cat barely notices you anyway. 6. Once you and the cat are inside the bathroom, speed is of the essence. In a single fluid motion, shut the door to the bathroom, step into the shower, close the glass doors, and drop the cat into the water. While the cat is still in a state of shock, grasp the Kitty Bubbles and squirt whatever part of the cat is above the water line. You have just begun the wildest 45 seconds of your life. Remember that cats have no handles; add to that the fact that the cat now has soapy fur. His state of shock has worn off and he’s madder than a wet hornet. Looks a little like one, too. 7. As best you can while wearing welder’s gloves, try to grab hold of the cat as he catapults through the air toward the ceiling. If possible, give another squirt of Kitty Bubbles while his body is fully exposed in midair. 8. During the five seconds you are able to hold onto him, rub the
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cat vigorously. There is no need to worry about rinsing, because the cat will invariably slide down the glass enclosure into the tub, fall back into the water, thrash about wildly, and rinse himself in the process. 9. Only attempt the lather and rinse process about three times. By that point, the cat will have realized the lack of traction on the glass and on the next attempt will climb the most readily available part of you. 10. Next, the cat must be dried. No, this is not the easiest part. By this stage, you will be worn out and the cat will have just become semi-permanently affixed to your right leg. We suggest here that you drain the tub and - in full view of your cat - reach for the bottle of Kitty Bubbles. 11. If you have done step 10 correctly, the cat will have left your leg and will be hanging precariously from your helmet. Although this view of the cat is most disgusting, he will be in a much better position for you to wrap the towel around him. 12. Be sure the cat is firmly wrapped in the towel before opening the tub enclosure. Quickly step out, open bathroom door, put the towel-wrapped cat on the floor, step back quickly into the tub enclosure and close the glass door. 13. Do not open the glass door until all you can see is the shredded towel. Remain in the shower while administering first aid to any part of your body which accidentally became uncovered during the bathing process. 14. In about two hours it should be safe to exit the bathroom. Your cat will be sitting out there somewhere looking like a small damp hedgehog while plotting revenge. Congratulations! You have just bathed your cat. Once you have recovered, begin planning your strategy for getting him into the shower next time, since the nonchalant pick-up will only work once. In fact, since your cat will be determined never to let you trick him like that again, you might want to be careful around him for a while. Even if you have no ulterior motives whatsoever your cat, who no longer trusts you, may for any reason or no reason, completely freak out on you at any time within the next week or two.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Use of the Car A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss the use of the car. His father took him to his study and said to him, “I’ll make a deal with you. You bring your grades up, study your bible a little and get your hair cut and we’ll talk about it.” After about a month the boy came back and again asked his father if they could discuss use of the car. They again went to the father’s study where his father said, “Son, I’ve been real proud of you. You have brought your grades up, you’ve studied your bible diligently, but you didn’t get your hair cut!” The young man waited a moment and replied, “You know Dad, I’ve been thinking about that. You know, Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair....” To which his father replied....” Yes, and they WALKED everywhere they went! ********************* I Don’t Want to Go to Church A mother went to wake her son for church one Sunday morning. When she knocked on his door, he said, “I’m not going!” “Why not?” asked his mother. “I’ll give you two good reasons,” he said. “One, they don’t like me. Two, I don’t like them.” His mother replied, “I’ll give you two good reasons why YOU WILL go to church. One, you’re 47 years old. Two, you’re the pastor!”
An English professor wrote the words, “A woman without her man is nothing” on the blackboard and directed the students to punctuate it correctly. The men wrote: “A woman, without her man, is nothing.” The women wrote: “A woman: withouth her, man is nothing.”
Food & Water So Vitally Important by Whitney Faske
How much do we really care about where our food and water comes from and what it contains? In the last century we have become blind sided by the impact of GMO’s, additives and ultimately dependency. For most of us, gone are the days of supplying food for you and your neighbors, and drinking the water from a hand dug well. My 102-year-old granny tells us stories from a time that seems so far away but she still lives like this to this day. She lives in her own home and has a 40-foot hand dug well which supplies her water.. She grows her own food, as much as she can...after all she is over 100! But before age set in and blindness from macular degeneration, she had the most beautiful garden I have ever seen. Fresh vegetables were always on the plate and the meat was usually fresh bass caught and fried that day or locally bought and butchered pork. She taught me all about plants, soil preparation and the tender love and care they needed. Even if they are just plants, she handled them as if they were a newborn baby. In early spring she would start the seeds she saved from the last growing season. Any container she had would line her porch, filled with fresh dirt my brother and I would help her find in the woods, under rotted leaves or down by the creek. Once the seedlings were big enough, and her garden was plowed (with a one row hand push plow) and the weeds and old plant stalks were burned and turned into the soil, she would carefully remove the young plants and set them in their rightful spot where they would grow vigorously. I always thought her water was magic because if I tried planting at my own home they just didn’t grow the same. As I grew older I realized that it really is the fact of unadulterated water, without added chlorine or fluoride... just straight out of the ground, chalk full of natural minerals. I highly value the lessons my granny taught me and I owe it to her to help the rest of us understand...We must take back our
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food. When we go to the store and buy our seeds; are we choosing seeds that will be able to grow next year?
Hybrids, Heirlooms and GMO’s If you are going to take the time to grow a garden, this is important. A hybrid plant is made by naturally cross-pollinating two plants to make one superior plant. Although, you can save your seed from the crop grown, it is likely it will not produce the same as the year before. Heirloom variety seeds are my favorite. It can only be classified an heirloom if it has been around 50 years or more. These are tried and true plants from the generations before us. If planted correctly, you can self sustain yourself with pure and true plants...but plant carefully because they will cross-pollinate. GMO’s (Genetically Modified Organisms) have quickly become the “killer bee” of our gardens. Like the killer bee, a chemical company has been able to change the makeup of a seed so much, that it is infiltrating and suffocating our sustainable seeds. These seeds were created to be herbicide tolerant and because of the patent you are not allowed to save and replant your seeds. Corn, the most consumed crop, when less that a foot tall can be sprayed with roundup and not wilt and die because the seed was created with a roundup gene. When it starts making ears and kernels a bug can take one bite and fall off and die. Yes, you eat that same ear and you are eating poison. My husband and I conducted our own “scientific” research when we caught a yearling hog. We gave it an ear of GMO corn from our farm in Milam County and an ear of heirloom, Reid’s Yellow Dent, from our Lee County field. The hog devoured the heirloom corn and never touched the GMO. We left it in there 2 days and still, she never ate it. I know it’s not science, but we should take note, if a hog that will eat anything and everything knows the difference, ...so should we. Corn is not the only plant that has been genetically modified. Some of the others are wheat, soybeans, papaya, potatoes, sugar beets, summer and zucchini squash, apples, tomatoes, and the list goes on. In our small community we can do our part in stopping this. Unlike the 1000 acre farms that span the corn belt, our fields our smaller and more secluded. We can search and buy heirloom corn, maize, wheat, oats and more and not have to worry about cross pollination. Did you know that heirloom varieties are also cheaper and you can reuse the seeds? In our 2 years of experience, we have seen heirloom varieties produce as much if not better yields. Like my Granny and the generations of a simpler time, it is time for us to stand together and grow sustainable crops and insure we are not dependent on anyone but our neighbors and ourselves. That is why we need to start a Lee County Farmers Market. There we can have handmade goods, produce and hopefully start a seed exchange. I would like to become a member of that group and if anyone else has an interest, please call Whitney Faske at wdfaske@gmail.com or 979-540-7168.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Life After Death “Do you believe in life after death?” the boss asked one of his employees. “Yes, sir,” the new employee replied. “Well, then, that makes everything just fine,” the boss went on. “After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother’s funeral, she stopped in to see you!” Support a Family The prospective father-in-law asked, “Young man, can you support a family?” The surprised groom-to-be replied, “Well, no. I was just planning to support your daughter. The rest of you will have to fend for yourselves.” First Time Ushers A little boy in church for the first time watched as the ushers passed around the offering plates. When they came near his pew, the boy said loudly, “Don’t pay for me daddy - I’m under five.” The Water Pistol When my three-year-old son opened the birthday gift from his grandmother, he discovered a water pistol...he squealed with delight and headed for the nearest sink. I was not so pleased. I turned to mom and said, “I’m surprised at you. Don’t you remember how we used to drive you crazy with water guns?” Mom smiled and then replied, “OH YES! I do remember.” We Are But Dust A visiting minister prayed during the offertory prayer: “Dear Lord” he began with arms extended and a rapturous look on his face, “without you we are but dust...” He would have continued, but at that moment one very obedient little girl (who was listening very carefully for a change) leaned over to her mother as asked quite audibly in her shrill little voice, “Mommy, WHAT is butt dust?” Church was pretty much over at that point.
When the store manager returned from lunch, he noticed his clerk’s hand was bandaged, but before he could ask about the bandage, the clerk had some very good news for him. “Guess what, sir?” the clerk said, “I finally sold that terrible, ugly suit we’ve had so long!” “Do you mean that replusive pink-and-blue double-breasted thing?” the manager asked. “That’s the one!” “That’s great!” the manager cried, “I thought we’d never get rid of that monstrosity! That had to be the ugliest suit we’ve ever had! But tell me, why is your hand bandaged?” “Oh,” the clerk replied, “after I sold the guy that suit, his seeing-eye dog bit me.”
The Dime Box Black Bridge Festival and Annual Mini-Marathon October 6 - 7, 2017
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little history of our event: The Dime Box MiniFair originated in 1974 to help celebrate the 100th Anniversary of Lee County while the Dime Box Mini-Marathon was begun in 1978 as an Eagle Scout project. These two were combined and have become the Dime Box Black Bridge Festival and MiniMarathon which is held on the first weekend in October annually. This event has become the chief fundraiser for the Dime Box Lions Club. Most of the proceeds are used for scholarships and community needs. The Dime Box Lions Club has given over 100 scholarships during the 28 years we have been in existence. Also, we maintain the light at the FM 141 and Hwy 21 intersection, provide eye glasses for needy persons, sponsor a child for camp, put up a community Christmas tree, bring Santa to town, recycle aluminum cans and support Lions Club activities worldwide.
The Dime Box Lions Club has added as our focus the historic Black Bridge which spanned the railroad from 1912 until 1998. The bridge, also known as the Moses Bridge was destined to be sold for scrap, and was “rescued” by the Lion’s Club and moved to the SPJST Lodge 13, Dime Box property in 1998. In 2015 the Dime Box Lions Club was able to move the bridge to its final resting place on land owned by the Lions Club adjacent to the Rodeo Arena with plans for a community park and walking trail. We would like to offer you the opportunity to sponsor this historical event. Last year, the Black Bridge Festival and Mini Marathon attracted approximately 5000 persons during the two days of our festival. We hope you can fit us into your advertising budget for 2017. For more information about sponsorships please contract Rhonda Pharis at 979-777-8682 orrhondapharis@yahoo.com.
Photograph by Jeanie Gold 32
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Deer Season
Police STOP at 2 AM
The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season.
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night.
Our pastor asked who had bagged a deer. No one raised a hand. Puzzled, the pastor said, “I don’t get it. Last Sunday many of you said you were unable to make service because of hunting season. I had the whole congregation pray for your deer. One hunter groaned, “Well, it worked. They’re all safe.”
The man replies, “I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects is has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late.” The officer then asks, “Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?” The man replies, “That would be my wife.”
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Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers We Need A New Cuckoo Clock The other night I was invited out for a night with the girls. I told my husband that I would be home by midnight. Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3AM, a bit loaded, I headed home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and ‘cuckooed’ three times. Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I ‘cuckooed’ another NINE times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him, “Midnight.” He didn’t seem angry in the least. Whew, I got away with that one! Then he said, “But we need a new clock.” When I asked him why, he said, “Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, ‘ouch.’ Cuckooed four more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table.” His Son Got A Part In The School Play Billy’s father picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment. Knowing the acting roles for the school play were being posted that day, he asked Billy if he got a part. Billy enthusiastically announced that he’d gotten a part. “I play a man who’s been married for twenty years.” “That’s great, son. Keep up the good work and before you know it they’ll be giving you a speaking part.”
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on. ~Winston Churchill~
Memories& by Chris Nietubicz
Forgiveness
If you have ever been around young children for any length of time, they will totally surprise you. My two kids seem to be able to remember the smallest things that happened long ago, at some of the oddest moments. This past week while we were driving, my daughter spoke up and said, “Dad, remember when I saw …?.” The thing that my daughter remembered happened over two years ago and just once, but the memory was like yesterday for her. We too have memories that we will never forget: some good and some not so good. When our mind is reminded of the event, our emotions and memories of the event come flooding back. I can remember when I got married, when I graduated from college, then seminary and when my kids were born. I remember these events as if they were yesterday. Along with those positive memories, my mind can recall some of the hardest parts of my life. Very often during these difficult times, my memory associates these struggles with a person or an organization.
Life on Earth is too short to hold onto grudges... I’m not sure about you, but too often my mind tightly holds on to these negative memories from the past, For whatever reason, I personally struggle to let go of these memories and not hold the person or organization responsible for what is in my head. The ability to forgive and let go seems impossible. In my head, it seems easier to hold a grudge than to let go. The problem with a grudge is that it hurts you more than the person or organization you are upset with. Many times the person has no clue that you are upset. As your mind brews over the event, these grudges eat away at you and consume you. Many years back, the opportunity to talk to a person with who I had a grudge. This grudge was deep and really hurt. As I talked it out, the person had no idea that this was even a problem. At the end of our talk it became clear that many of the issues were misunderstandings or things that were not meant to hurt me personally. The event that had consumed so many of my thoughts for years was finally gone. Jesus teaches that we are to forgive others. In Matthew 18, Je-
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sus says we are to forgive, not just once but seventy times seven -- some 490 times -- a number so high that we could never reach the end. He must have known how much holding on to unforgiven events in our past can affect us and the importance of letting things go. Yet we still hold on to things like they happened yesterday. God’s forgiveness is complete. Micah 7:18 says, “Who is a God like you, pardoning iniquity and passing over transgressions for the remnant of his inheritance? He does not retain his anger forever, because he delights in steadfast love (ESV).” God forgives and does not let his anger stay forever. We too are told that we should forgive like God. This summer, I challenge myself, and you, to forgive. Forgive those who have wronged you. Let go of your grudges and move forward. It does you no good to cling to the past. Forgiveness is of God, so forgive, and be forgiven. Our past memories do not need to be filled with bitterness and anger, but should be full of joy and hope! Life on earth is too short to hold on to grudges, so live a life of forgiving others and letting go of those things that have offended you. I know this is easier said than done, but God’s love, found in the sacrifice of Christ, is greater than any of our past and present grudges. Forgive as God has forgiven you. Chris earned his Masters of Divinity in 2016 from Concordia Seminary. Chris’s first call is to Immanuel Lutheran Church as Associate Postor. His focus is on discipleship ministry. Chris was born in Nacogdoches but grew up in Carrolton. He married his wife, Lauren in 2005. They have two children, daughter, Lillie, a shy 4 year old and their son, Mark, a talkative 2 year old. The family is excited for a new adventure as they settle into the community.
Small Town Law Enforcement by Rodney Meyer Lee County Sheriff
The History of the Office of Sheriff During the colonization of America, the Sheriff became an integral part of our government. American sheriffs undertook the English responsibilities of law enforcement and tax collection, as well as new responsibilities such as chief executive officer of the county and overseeing jails. The duties of serving criminal and civil process, summoning juries, executing judgments and conducting judicial sales soon evolved. The term “high sheriff ” was used to distinguish the sheriff from deputies, assistants or under sheriffs. The Office of Sheriff is one of the oldest offices known to our system of jurisprudence. Sheriffs are elected to office and serve for a four-year term. The sizes of Texas Sheriffs’ offices are as diverse as the population of their counties. The Office of Sheriff in Texas was created by the Texas Constitution. History indicates in 1827, Stephen F. Austin requested and received authorization for establishment of Constitutional Government in his colony. The first Sheriff in Texas was appointed in 1828. There are 254 Counties in Texas and each county has a Sheriff. By statutes, the Sheriff is a Texas peace officer, a conservator of the peace, enforces the criminal laws of the State, and is responsible for the county jail, bail bonds, civil process, and security of the courts. In some small counties, the Sheriff is also the tax collector.
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The Lee County Sheriff ’s Office has been providing law enforcement services to the citizens of Lee County since 1874, beginning with the first county Sheriff, James McKeown. In February 1876, the infamous James Madison Brown was elected Sheriff. Browns most notable act was the legal hanging of noted outlaw William P. Longley. Since 1874, there has been 14 Sheriffs to serve Lee County. During this time, a father (Vernon A. Goodson) and son (Joe G. Goodson) held the office of Sheriff for over 56 years. Below are the 14 men that took Office of the Lee County Sheriff. James. H. McKeown (June 2, 1874- Feb 15, 1876) James M. Brown (Feb 15, 1876- Nov 4, 1884) William. M. Brown (Nov 4, 1884- Nov 6, 1888) O.A. Bexley (Nov 6, 1888-Nov 4, 1890) James S. Scarborough 1891-1896 I. W. Sparks 1897-1902 James S. Scarborough 1903-1910 W.D. Scarborough 1911-1918 John T. Carlisle 1919-1928 John J. Burttschell 1929-1934 Ernest Allen 1935-1938 John J. Burttschell 1939-1950 Vernon A. Goodson 1951-1974 Charles “Lucky” Thompson (Nov 2, 1976- Dec 19, 1978) Joe G. Goodson (Dec 20, 1978- Apr 7, 2007) Rodney W. Meyer (Apr 9, 2007 – Present
have wondered at times about what the Ten Commandments would have looked like if Moses had run them through the U.S. Congress.. -Ronald Reagan-