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On the Cover Have We Gone Too Far About the Cover From Us To You Professional Directory Food Just Like Moms Finding Her Niche Spotlight on Burleson County Heritage From the Back Porch Connecting Community History Trump Does the Unthinkable Ragged Old Flag And One Day, He’s Coming Lest We Forget Have You Ever Gone to Bed Hungry Quick & Easy Family Dinners Daddy’s Day It’s Not Just Wine & Roses A Step Too Far God! Help! I Need Strength Drought 2019 / 2020 Real Life in Never Never Land Managing Cash Flo in Retirement Please Be Aware Enough With Compromise Do You Know Where My Wife Is? The Sure Fire Red Hot Cures You Might Be a Texas If Give & It Shall Be Given to You I Dreamed I Went to Heaven A Step Ahead Tossed Green Salad Desserts or Stress What You Need to Know Explaining the Coronavirus On the Right Track Detour
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Have we gone too far? A perspective on how we are really more alike than different. It seems lately that anywhere you look, you can see doom and gloom. The ability to find something that is heartwarming and uplifting in the news is not as prevalent as the nail-biting and gutwrenching stories that make the headlines. Whether it is online, in print, word of mouth, or through television, the uncertainty is there. Have we gone too far? What I would like to propose for consideration is that we are really more alike than different. The truth is I’m not living in an imaginary world where I would believe that we will agree on everything. I’m not even suggesting we agree on anything. What I am suggesting is that whatever the case may be, we would consider for an instant what is happening on the other side of the aisle, if you will. This is a piece about hope. A story about how we are really more alike than different. This is about considering that when someone disrespects the office of the United States President or the local laws in place to protect us, there is practice of some self-awareness. I’d like to propose that we remain sensitive to the situation that has caused us to be in the position we find ourselves in, in the first place. Recently as I watched someone from a highly respectable position in our country disregard and destroy a copy of the State of the Union Address with the cameras rolling, I was so sad. As I listened and watched eyes roll, while others applauded, it was disheartening. It was not because I agreed with either party. We all realize that there will always be at least two sides to every story. Yet, it still troubles me to think the young eyes watching the events unfold learn blatant disrespect is tolerated and even encouraged. It seems we live in a time where discouragement and disappointment run rampant. Our society is at arms with each other on many opinions. Although there may be merit to both sides, they seem to divide us as citizens. Don’t misunderstand or think that it is even suggested that we would all agree with any political figure. I recognize there are different parties for many valid and necessary reasons. This is not the issue. The issue, people, is that we are all
people. We are Americans first, and we are more alike than different. On November 1st, I had a stroke that changed my outlook in so many ways. I was told I wouldn’t be able to travel for a few months, and I should lower my stress. I blamed it on my family’s genes. I continued to say on that Friday morning, “I need to get on a plane on Monday. I am speaking in Phoenix on Tuesday.” Sometimes it takes a BIG EVENT to make us realize how vulnerable we are. Perhaps to have us understand how really big our God is. To have us know that at the end of the day, we are NOT IN CHARGE! This was the day for me that things became much clearer. Real friendships more transparent, love more apparent, and life much more precious. With the Covid19 virus running amuck and cancellations of many events becoming regular news, we see more Americans unite. Whether tragedies happen to our country (like 9-11 or Covid19) or in our country (like a mass shooting at a country concert), Americans are more alike than different. Why is this? It seems that when disaster or catastrophe strikes us as people, we become more tolerant of our differences. We seem to be more united than separated. Our ability to try to understand and accept others is far more generous than in times of strong opinions about laws, politics, or religion. As a professional speaker, I have little to nothing in common with the track and field athletes’ gathering at Texas A & M in March 2020. However, I’m finding myself understanding how all the years of preparation and practice of these young track stars (many seniors) are over in an instant with no opportunity to see the fruits of their labor. This week, I had three speaking events cancel for the remainder of this month. Three events that I have spent time and energy preparing for. Three events that caused me to say no to others. Three events with some non-refundable travel involved. Three events that will cost me and my business real money. Lost income, if you will. I believe in this moment that these athletes and I are more alike than different. I sat in a courtroom last week and thought about the article I would write. I observed a jury stirred at times and stoic at others. It occurred to me that people on each side of the aisle in that courthouse lost something to some degree. Let me be clear; no one lost like the young man who lost his life. What occurred to me on the second day of the trial was that there were no real winners here. It struck me in an instant that the pictures, testimonies, and mother’s and father’s words would not bring this young man back. These parents would never be whole. As a human, we want justice as a human; we want something to feel good. Yet, many times we don’t want someone else to be hurt, but we do want them to be accountable. Accountability is at the heart of many issues that have damaged our morale and our society. It’s not always necessarily that we don’t agree about something. It is almost always about accountability. Taking responsibility and being accountable for something is a behavior we should be committed to teaching our children. For
many years, my husband and I had a lesson about the five hardest words you’ll ever have to say: “I’m sorry; I was wrong.” He would tell them learning to say this might one day save their marriage, church, business, even their life. These five words have no pride, no arrogance, and no conceit. They are vulnerable; they are openhearted and should be authentic. I’d like to share that I started this article ten days ago and since then things have turned to mayhem in our country. At the beginning of this story, I had three gigs cancel, and now that has more than tripled. Also, my husband’s dental practice has been limited to emergency care only for at least four-plus weeks. Earlier, I shared that after my medical emergency in November, I told the stroke team what needed to happen and where I needed to be. At about 24 hours, things became real, and I recognized that the stress that pushed me to this incident was on me. The ability to remain concerned yet composed was now on me. I can’t change my genes, but it is my responsibility to learn to react to things in a way that is supportive of my long-term goals. Today some might say I should be stressed out, but it doesn’t support my desire to live another day. We need to realize that as a country we are more alike than different today. Even more alike than just three short weeks ago. Many are out of work. Some concerned about family, food, even shelter. Yet,we’re together in the compassion and heartfelt outflow for those most vulnerable to this new disease. As I completed this story, I found this random photograph taken during a photoshoot for St. Joseph’s stroke unit three months after my incident. All posed pictures were completed. We gathered and reflected for an emotional reunion in Trauma Room 1. I was vulnerable and very exposed when I looked at the doctor who we credit with saving my life and giving us hope. In my weakest moment, he was brave and prayed with us for me. Things turned around as no one could believe in a short period of time. I’d like to suggest that everyone reading this do just that. Have we gone too far? I don’t think so. Be brave, be vulnerable, and stay humbled as you consider saying and praying to the only person who can help us now.
JoAn Majors is a professional speaker and published author. She is a mem-
ber of the National Speakers Association and the Global Speakers Network. She holds the designation as Certified Speaking Professional, (CSP) held by less than 12% of 5,000+ speakers worldwide. It is the highest earned international measure of professional platform competence. In addition, she has been published in 30 plus newsletters, magazines and online learning platforms. JoAn is the founder and content creation specialist of The Soft Skills Institute, she delivers keynotes, 3 and 6 hour presentations as well as a 2-day deep dive experience in developing the soft skills it takes to create greater connection today in business and life. When not on the road she functions as the Comprehensive Care Coordinator in their fourth and final practice, MajorSmiles in Bryan, Texas. To learn more or see JoAn in action, visit: www.joanmajors.com.
HOMETOWN BOY Our cover for this edition of the Front Porch Magazine is the home of Mike Valigura. His “built for me” house is located in the Oaks at Copperas Hollow. This home is a new one, finished in 2018. Mike says he’s celebrated two Christmases there now. Mike explains he had owned all but 3 lots of the Bent Oak area, having purchased them from Jeff Chapman. So he decided to use one of the lots to build a home for himself, exactly the way he wanted it. He says it isn’t too masculine, but was definitely built for a guy. His open concept living and dining area are spacious, as are his two bedrooms. He enjoys his large study, with windows that look out onto the front porch and yard. He also enjoys the large kitchen, storage, and utility rooms in the house. But his favorite feature is his big walk-in shower, affectionately known as “the car wash”. When asked about porches, Mike quickly responded that he loves porches, especially front porches. He is in the process of building some homes in Somerville and plans to have porches on them. For his own porch, he says it’s time for him to add a porch swing, which will provide a place for sitting under the ceiling fan, relaxing and enjoying visitors, whether they be relatives or friends. Mike, born and reared in Caldwell, says he is happy to be back home near his family members, Mark & Connie Valigura, and Kathy & Steve Kocurek and their families. Though his dad died last year, his mom, Rose Valigura, still lives near downtown here in Caldwell. (For all you old timers, you will remember that Mike’s dad had Valigura’s Market until he sold out to J&H in the midseventies.) After graduating from Texas A&M with her masters in
Home to Stay equine nutrition, his daughter Hannah Valigura is now at Mississippi State working on her PHD. But when she is home for a visit, they always enjoy sitting on the front porch together! Mike has fond memories of growing up here. He remembers all the sports he played in junior high and high school. He played them all except basketball, and that was because he simply couldn’t excel in it, he says. He fondly remembers Vic Barnett coaching him in junior high, and George Jett leading them to the district championship in football. Knowing that Mike is running for mayor, we asked him about his ideas. He quickly stated that he feels he can do some good for the city. He has a business degree from the University of Texas, and has been a successful home builder for the past 40+ years. He feels that his degree along with his business experience will help in his duties as mayor. He says that he came back to Caldwell with fresh eyes and would like to see downtown thriving like he remembers while living here growing up. In addition, there are two large subdivisions going in right now, that will bring additional people to town. This growth will bring many opportunities, but also some challenges. He wants to insure that Caldwell remains a great place to live, with a great downtown where people can go to shop and visit and enjoy life. His slogan for his campaign is Leadership for Responsible Growth. Mike says he is a hometown boy, and is home to stay!
F
rom us to you Editors Note
Dear Readers, As we are finishing up the production of the Front Porch, we find ourselves in the midst of the Coronavirus, COVID-19 concern. At present we’ve locked ourselves inside the building and are accepting no outside presence in order to complete this edition. We feel we owe you, our dedicated readers, writers, and advertisers the completion of the magazine. Never in our lifetime have we faced such a pandemic, nor has the majority of you, I feel sure. Dealing with this invisible enemy is humbling and uniting while scary and unsettling at the same time. Many, if not most adult Americans, are “glued to the tube.” We want the information about how the virus is affecting our nation and our individual states. We want to know how N Y, Washington State, and California are progressing. We want to know what medications are on the way. As we’ve gotten through the weeks of this, we have experienced an outpouring of concern for others as we face this enemy together. People call each other and check on them, and shop for older citizens. Prayer and recognition of the need for God’s help in all of this has humbled many of us. We are not as independent as we once believed, and that was not that long ago. But, dear reader, stay strong. Do what you are told to do! Let’s defeat the spread of this virus: wash your hands for 20+ seconds, distance yourself from others, refrain from hugging and touching, and clean the surfaces of your home or office, actually anywhere you spend time. And gloves and masks are good options if you must go out. No one knows the future, but we hope and we pray that our next edition will be in better circumstances…and we are found to be better people because of what we have faced. Thanks for reading The Front Porch. And thanks for passing it on to friends and family far from our location. We are still amazed to receive subscriptions from far and wide. We are truly blessed, and we pray blessings of health and prosperity on each of you. With sincerity, Sandi & Scarlette
professional directory Air Conditioning-Installation & Repair Reliant Mechanical 53 Weaver’s Refrigeration 41 Appliance Repair Pena Services 51 Automobile Parts-Supplies-Repairs Bud Cross Ford 27 Burleson County Motor Supply 61 dBm Auto Repair 32 Automobile Sales-Detail Bud Cross Ford 27 Milton Hodges -Caldwell Country 51 Banks Citizens State Bank 23 BarBQ Matus BarBQ 36 Beef - Local - All Natural Diamond A Ranch Beef 33 Burleson County Events Fair Association 49 Churches Church of Christ 53 First Baptist 44 City/Civic/Government Burleson County Republican Party 55 City of Caldwell 47 City of Somerville 48 Convenience Store Cat’s Pitt Stop 60 Granpops Country Store 50 Construction C & H Building Construction 41 The Farmhouse Twist 68 Dentistry Drgac Dental 21 MajorSmiles 2 Michael K. Reese 63 Dozer Services Hubert Hoyack 25 Farm Equipment Small Farm Innovations 10 Feed Faust Farms 39 Homeyer Feed & Supply 37 Financials LPL Financial 15 Florist Wine & Roses 32 Funeral Home Phillips & Luckey 49 Garden Accessories Garden Hoots 10 Gift Shop Wine & Roses 32
Guns - License to Carry Providence Hill 5 Health Care CHI St. Joseph Hospital 54 CHI St. Joseph Skilled Nursing 13 Hope Pregnancy 46 Insurance Brazos Health Benefits 57 Germania Insurance 14 Liquor Store King’s Liquor 65 Livestock Commission Caldwell Livestock Com. 22 Lumber Company Woodson’s Lumber Company 19 Oil & Gas Star Testers 36 Pest Control Armstrong Pesticide Solutions 20 Photograpy Schuman Photography 8 Political Mike Valigura 17 Printing & Copy Services ImageMaker Copy Center 68 Plumbing DP Plumbing 61 Real Estate Becky Schenk 61 Home & Ranch Real Estate 3 Polansky Realty 27 The Farmhouse Twist 68 Restaurants & Cateing Branding Iron 12 DE&S Donuts 43 Granpops 50 Lo Nuestro de Mexico 7 Masfajitas Mexican Restaurant 49 Texas Seafood & Steakhouse 67 The Garden Spot 29 Service Station Groce’s Service Station 12 Tax Preparers & Advisors Danny Koerth 29 Truck-Auto-Tires-Supplies Burleson County Motor Supply 61 Mitchell Tire Service 47 Veterinarian BVMVS 39 Vitamins Roots & Shoots 9 Water Well Drilling Loehr Drilling Co, Inc 25 Welding & Fabricating C&H Welding & Fabrication 43
Sandi Balcar & Scarlette Taylor publishers
sandi balcar
layout & design EDITOR
scarlette taylor advertising sales EDITOR
SCHUMAN PHOTOGRAPHY photographer
contributing writers
neal beard EDWIN COOPER Liz Crokin kaitlyn dunn janice easter Sharon ann laffere Ehlert cheryl costello-forshey marsha kocurek tammy kubecka JOAN majors dr. jack Mckemie dvm KAVON NOVAK renita odstrcil donna varner presnal dEL rOGERS, sR. Tommy ryan BECKY SCHENK SCARLETTE Taylor POLLY WILLIAMs CHRIS VAUGHN - CONTRIBUTOR Phone 979.567.7871 979.567.6753 301 Hwy 21 E Caldwell, TX 77836 www.frontporchmagazine.com The contents of all articles do not represent the views of the Front Porch Magazine. The magazine claims no responsibility for the accuracy of information or content.
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Food just like
Moms
The Branding Iron Lunch Box, located at 206 1/2 E Highway 21, Caldwell, Texas, next to McDonalds, is a new and welcomed cafe in the area. Owners Brenda Woodworth, daughter Stacy Vance, and granddaughter Morgan Ihlenfeldt are the owners of The Branding Iron Lunch Box, the successful breakfast and lunch establishment. Brenda is no new-comer to the restaurant business. She’s lived here in Caldwell for 26 years, and for 6 years had The Branding Iron Restaurant beside the hospital. Tragically, she had a bad wreck and was not able to keep the restaurant open. Originally, Brenda was from Austin, but moved to Spicewood, near Marble Falls. There she owned B J’s Restaurant and ran it for several years. She says people thought it was named after her, Brenda Joyce, but she says B J was actually the initials for Brenda and Jesus. Two years ago, Brenda wanted to open a restaurant and decided to go and take out a loan, but then someone overheard her trying to get the loan and gave her the money. The person said Jesus wanted them to help her. The Branding Iron offers breakfast as well as lunch from a full menu. Burgers, sandwiches, Philly cheese steaks, salads and enchiladas are also available. And there are lunch specials daily Monday through Friday. Monday-chef choice; Tuesdaymeat loaf; Wednesday-Hamburger Steak; Thursday-Fried Pork Chops: Friday-Liver and Onions. And Saturday is a Create Your Own special. Anyone can order chicken fried steak any day of the week, if wanted instead of the special of the day. Brenda has plans for the future of Branding Iron Lunchbox. Coming events/additions for the menu include: Soups, broccoli
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cheese along with other varieties. And she is thinking that meat loaf subs, and stuffed burgers, with jalapeno, mushrooms, and cheese will possibly be liked. And another thought in mind is the Friday evening of Rajin’ Caijun food. Brenda says that whatever is served is well received by faithful customers at Branding Iron Lunch Box. And she says her slogan is “All Our Food is Spiced with love from above.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers No Excuse Sunday To make it possible for everyone to attend church this Sunday, we are going to have a special “No Excuse Sunday”: Cots will be placed in the foyer for those who say, “Sunday is my only day to sleep in.” There will be a special section with lounge chairs for those who feel that our pews are too hard. Eye drops will be available for those with tired eyes from watching TV late Saturday night. We will have steel helmets for those who say, “The roof would cave in if I ever came to church.” Blankets will be furnished for those who think the church is too cold, and fans for those who say it is too hot. Scorecards will be available for those who wish to list the hypocrites present. Relatives and friends will be in attendance for those who can’t go to church and cook dinner, too. We will distribute “Stamp Out Stewardship” buttons for those that feel the church is always asking for money. One section will be devoted to trees and grass for those who like to seek God in nature. Doctors and nurses will be in attendance for those who
plan to be sick on Sunday. The sanctuary will be decorated with both Christmas poinsettias and Easter lilies for those who never have seen the church without them. We will provide hearing aids for those who can’t hear the preacher and cotton wool for those who think he’s too loud!
Tracy Pieper, new owner of Jaecks Insurance Agency, located down-town at 102 South Echols, has found her niche here in our small town of Caldwell. Pieper has been the owner of the agency since July 1, 2019, and she comes to us with much experience from Germania’s home office in Brenham. Tracy’s career has been centered around the insurance business with 18 years spent at Germania and 5 years at State Farm. She enjoys being able to help people plan for their futures and get to know them. Her goal is to provide coverage that her customers can rely on. Working as a sales rep for Germania with 63 agents in all areas of Texas was something she thoroughly enjoyed. However, what she discovered was she wanted a place to establish roots and serve an entire community. Tracy was actually the sales rep for Garland Jaecks, owner of Jaecks Agency, and after the family decided to go outside to sell the agency, Garland Jaecks and she began to talk. Caldwell is a community she has embraced as her own becoming a member of both the Rotary Club and the Chamber of Commerce. Pieper is excited to be here and says the people are welcoming. She is excited about the growth that is coming to Caldwell and is confident that even as Caldwell grows, the small-town appeal and warmth that it provides are values that won’t ever leave. Tracy Pieper has listened to feedback from the agency’s customers and has extended the operating hours of the agency to better accommodate clients. Jaecks will also be adding two additional insurance carriers in the future to give everyone more options in their selection of insurance that will best cover their desired needs. The full-service agency offers many services from personal lines (home, auto, & renter’s insurance) to commercial and business. The agency will be adding Medicare Supplements by the end of March. She has stated that she wants to be able to support everyone that she can with any insurance need they have. Jaecks Insurance Agency is an independent agency as well as a Farm Mutual Agency with laws that set it apart. One of these being that they have memberships, not stocks, and they each have a Chapter, 21 for Caldwell which has been in operation for some 100 years now. Local chapter meetings are still required for agents and is one of Pieper’s favorite parts of the business as this is a time where she can meet with all of her customers over good food and conversation. These meetings first began as farmers met in homes and conducted their insurance business. In the beginning, the first meetings were actually recorded in German. Tracy loves the history of the agency and of Caldwell’s downtown area. After she opened for business, Bob Smith dropped by and shared the history of his grandfather’s grocery store in the same location of her office which she loved hearing. Pieper, whose parents were from Hempstead and Brenham, was taught to value hard-work, community, family and the importance of giving back. Tracy is proud to be the owner of Jaecks and a member of the Caldwell community. She is also proud to be the mother of her two grown children who she has involved in the agency. Her son Hayden works at the agency and her daughter Lauren who lives and works in Austin but assists Pieper in community events. Aimee Lewis who lives in Somerville works in the agency as well. Tracy hopes to continue to be an insurance agent that Caldwell can trust as this is where she has found her calling. Caldwell does indeed seem to be the fit for Pieper. Be sure to go by and meet her and her staff.
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I TOLD MY WIFE SHE SHOULD EMBRACE HER MISTAKES... SHE HUGGED ME.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Last week I purchased a burger for $1.58. I handed the cashier $2.00 and started digging for some change. I pulled out 8 cents and gave it to her. She stood there with $2 and 8 cents. She looked bewildered, holding the nickel and 3 pennies, while looking at the screen on her register. I sensed her discomfort and tried to tell her to just give me two quarters, but she hailed the manager for help. While he tried to explain the transaction to her, she burst into tears. The incident got me thinking about how our kids were learning math in school.... (or not). Teaching Math In 1950: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5ths of the price. What is his profit? Teaching Math In 1960: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is 4/5ths of the price, or $80. What is his profit? Teaching Math In 1970: A logger exchanges a set “L” of lumber for a set of “M” of money. The cardinality of set “M” is 100. Each element is worth one dollar. Make 100 dots representing the elements of the set “M.” The set “C,” the cost of production, contains 20 fewer points than set “M.” Represent the set “C” as a subset of set “M.” Answer this question: What is the cardinality of the set “P” of profits? Teaching Math In 1980: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $80 and his profit is $20. Your assignment: Underline the number 20. Teaching Math In 1990: By cutting down beautiful forest trees, the logger makes $20. What do you think of this way of making a living? Topic for class participation after answering the question: How did the forest birds and squirrels feel as the logger cut down the trees. (There are no wrong answers) Teaching Math In The 2000s: A logger sells a truckload of lumber for $100. His cost of production is $120. How does Goldman Sachs determine that his profit margin is $60?
ACCIDENTALLY went grocery shopping on an empty stomach and now I’m the proud owner of Aisle 4! Our Anniversary Trip For our 10 yr anniversary I bought my wife a map of the world. I wrapped it up in a box and attached a card. In the box was a dart and on the card it said: “Throw this dart at the map and anywhere it lands is where I am taking you.” I’d been saving up money for close to two years now because we never had a honeymoon. I then put the dart in my wife’s hand. She was so excited and nervous. She said: “I hope it lands on Ireland!” She finally threw the dart and I’m happy to announce that this October my wife and I will be spending two wonderful weeks beside the baseboard in the kitchen.
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S
potlight
on
Burleson County’s
Unique Heritage
People in all walks of life influence those around them. In this column, we will be featuring those who have made an impact in our small towns.
Marsha Kocurek A Passion for Service
When asked about her involvements, Kocurek spoke of being proud of the accomplishments of the Caldwell Education and Leadership Foundation, which she helped start and where she now serves as president. She says the foundation is so beneficial to both teachers and students. Marsha also spoke of volunteering her time to her church, St John’s Lutheran in Deanville, where her home is. She feels that work for the Lord is the best you do. She does work in and through the Church and says it’s a personal thing. It renews her. Again, she understands that we need to reach out to serve others. She says that if we put God first, all else falls into place. And the other work in her home of Deanville and in Burleson County is vast: Caldwell
Our Spotlight Focus for this April 2020 edition of the Front Porch Magazine is Marsha Kocurek. Her involvements in the area truly qualify her for recognition as a woman who has made an impact in our small towns. Marsha was born and reared in Burton, Texas, where her parents were educators. In fact, many of her family members are in education today. And she says that her passion for service to others was modeled before her by her parents. She watched as they always served others, and she understands the need to be involved in the lives of others and helping where she can. And helping is truly her life. Marsha says she wants to make the world better for her children, and she wants them to know that things don’t just happen…that people have to take on responsibilities to accomplish things in life.
Elementary School PTO, Burleson County Go Texan, Burleson County Fair Pet Show, Burleson County Girl Scouts, Deanville Heritage Foundation, Hermann Sons-Life Deanville, Dimebox Lions Club, and Burleson County Domestic Violence Task Force. Marsha’s educational pursuits are vast, as well. After graduating from Burton as Valedictorian of her class, she attended Blinn College, earning her A.A. and A.S. and later earned her B.S. from Texas A & M. Her educational pursuits continued after marrying Blake Kocurek and having their two children, 8 year old Bailen, and 6 year old Marley. After A&M, she attended Texas Women’s University where she gained her Masters of Communication Science and Disorders which prepared her for speech therapy work in Lexington ISD for 7 years. Presently, she works at CHI Burleson St Joseph part time and then with her husband Blake at Summit Pump and Safety in Caldwell. She adds that education has been a life-long passion for her. In fact, she is half way through her Doctorate from Baylor University. Marsha is truly a woman who serves well and often. And many in our area have benefitted from her generosity of time, facility, and effort. Thank you, Marsha.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers OMG did you hear the news...Shifty Claus is holding impeachment hearings on Rudolph. Seems that Comet overheard Vixen talking to Donner who spoke to Dasher, Dancer and Prancer behind a Christmas tree that Cupid says that Blitzen said that Rudolph bribed a reindeer in Ukraine for his red nose. The Committee said all of this can be confirmed by a secret whistle blower they suspect might be Elf On The Shelf.
I’m not sure if I washed the Spider down the drain in my shower or if he took one look at me naked and then leapt willingly to his death.
When I ask for directions... please don’t use words like “east.”
From the Back Porch They Walk Among Us and they Vote
I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, “The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.” He responded, “Is that Eastern or Pacific time?” Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, “Uh, Pacific.” ************* My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk. **************
I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. “Now,” she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?” ************** While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. “Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.” ************** One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, “Look at that dead bird!” Someone looked up at the sky and said, “Where?”
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it’s safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, ‘What on earth are blind people doing driving?!’ She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS ************** I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn’t understand why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less. ************** I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave it back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor and gave her the money back. She became indignant and informed me she was educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the money back again...same scenario! I departed the store with the $46.64. ************** When I left Hawaii and was transferred to FL, I still had the Hawaiian plates on my car, as my car was shipped from Hawaii. I was parking somewhere (I can’t remember) and a guy asked me “Wow, you drove from Hawaii to here?” I looked at him and quickly said “Yep. I took the Hawaii/San Francisco Bridge.” He nodded his head and said “Cool!”
Your Vote Has Impact One Person.....One Vote 18
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers A College Professor got up and said, “If God really exists, then let him knock me out of my chair.” Nothing Happened! The class was quiet. He said, now I will give it 2 more minutes. A Marine Vet stood up, punched him in the face knocking him out and off his chair, then sat back down. As the Professor came to, he looked at his student and said, “WHY DID YOU DO THAT?” The Marine said, GOD was busy protecting my buddies still fighting for your right to say and do stupid stuff like this so...HE SENT ME!
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Connecting
Community History by Tammy Kubecka
We all know that Burleson County is a great place to live, and we have all kinds of great history serving as the foundation of our lives. What really connects us is the interspersed communities across the county. As settlers rolled into the county, small towns flourished, added a post office, church, school, and businesses, and then often faded away. Each community adds to our collective history. Caldwell is the county seat of Burleson County of course, and was designated the county seat in 1840 for Milam County. It was surveyed by George B. Erath and named for Mathew Caldwell. Burleson County was created March 24, 1846 and Caldwell remained the county seat. Lying along the Old San Antonio Road, eventually boasting a courthouse square, the town was naturally the hub for county activity, especially after the Gulf, Colorado and Santa Fe Railway built its main line through Caldwell in 1880. The city was incorporated in 1891. Mound Prairie was an area of largely Czech settlers southeast of Caldwell and was a mail stop in the mid-1800s. Eventually the area was referred to as Sebesta, or Sebesta’s Corner, after the Frank Sebesta family, who were among the earliest settlers in the area. After a couple of stores, a saloon and a gin began operations, residents sought to obtain a post office in 1895. John S. Snook, the postmaster at Caldwell, arranged for the post office at the nearby community of Dabney Hill to be moved to a site halfway between Dabney Hill and Sebesta. The new post office was named Snook in his honor. Settlement in the Somerville area began in the mid-1830s, but when the Gulf, Colorado and Santa Fe Railway constructed its Galveston-Caldwell spur through the area in 1880, the community flourished. In 1883 William N. Landolt purchased the first lot in a new townsite and that same year a second rail spur from East Texas via Navasota was extended to the site, and soon a train depot, a railroad yard with repair shops, and a roundhouse for engine servicing were erected. A post office opened in 1894 for sixteen months and was reopened in 1897. The community was named for Albert Somerville, the first president of the Gulf, Colorado and Santa Fe Railway Company. Lyons is just north of Somerville and they share a lot of railroad history. When the Gulf, Colorado and Santa Fe Railway came through in 1880, a construction workers’ camp, known as Camp Pennington, was established near what is now the site of Lyons. Several saloons popped up to serve the railroad workers, and the basis for a small railroad community was born. Early settler W. A. Lyon gave fifty acres of land to the railroad for a right-ofway and established the first general store near the settlement.
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It was first called Lyon’s Station. By 1890 the community had a population of 150 and a post office was established. Cookes Point was named for Silas L. Cooke, a surveyor who lived in the area during the days of the Republic of Texas. The community began around the home of Gabriel Jackson in the 1830s and 1840s. It was at the crossing of the road from Washington-on-the-Brazos to Tenoxtitlán and the Old San Antonio Road and on the first mail route through the county. In 1854 Judge A. S. Broaddus led a wagon train from Virginia to Cookes Point. German and Czech settlers began moving into the area in the late 1800s, and by 1884 the developing community had a population of about 100. West of Caldwell, Deanville was established. Horatio Chriesman was one of the first settlers in the heavily wooded area in the late 1840s, but community that eventually developed in the vicinity was named for James L. Dean, who established a general store there in 1872. The first school in the area was called Chriesman Chapel School and it was also used as a church. The community flourished with the arrival of the railroad and a depot. Hogg is a tiny community located on SH21, northwest of Deanville. Settlement began in the area by the early 1860s when the White family purchased property and operated a stagecoach stop called the White Inn. When a post office opened in 1893 residents selected the name Hogg in honor of Governor James Hogg. The post office closed in 1905. Further northeast of Hogg, the Blackjack community was being settled about the same time.
Watch for the October issue of the Front Porch for The Rest of the Story..
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Fake News A Harley Biker is sitting on his Harley, drinking a beer, by the Zoo in Washington, DC when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the collar of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents. The biker jumps off his Harley, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from the pain, the lion jumps back letting go of the girl, and the biker brings the girl to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly. A reporter has watched the whole event. The reporter addressing the Harley rider says, “Sir, this was the most gallant and bravest thing I’ve seen a man do in my whole life.” The Harley rider replies, “Why, it was nothing, really. The lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.” The reporter says, “Well, I’ll make sure this won’t go unnoticed. I’m a journalist, you know, and tomorrow’s paper will have this story on the front page. So, what do you do for a living, and what political affiliation do you have?” The biker replies “I’m a U.S. Marine, a Republican and I’m voting for Trump.” The journalist leaves. The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on the front page: “U.S. MARINE ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT & STEALS HIS LUNCH” And THAT pretty much sums up the media’s approach to the news these days!
I HATE IT WHEN i SEE SOME OLD PERSON AND THEN REALIZE WE WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL TOGETHER.
Trump Does the Unthinkable by Liz Crokin
Liz Crokin is an award-winning author, a seasoned journalist and an advocate for sex crime victims. Liz began her journey at the University of Iowa where she received a bachelor’s in journalism and political science. She took advantage of living in the first-in-the-nation caucus state to work on John Kasich and George W. Bush’s presidential campaigns. Her experience landed her an internship working for Bill O’Reilly at Fox News Channel and then to Washington DC where she interned for the State Department’s White House Correspondent which planted her in the White House daily.
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As an entertainment journalist, I’ve had the opportunity to cover Trump for over a decade, and in all my years covering him I’ve never heard anything negative about the man until he announced he was running for president. Keep in mind, I got paid a lot of money to dig up dirt on celebrities like Trump for a living so a scandalous story on the famous billionaire could’ve potentially sold a lot of magazines and would’ve been a Huge feather in my cap. Instead, I found that he doesn’t drink alcohol or do drugs; he’s a hardworking businessman. On top of that, he’s one of the most generous celebrities in the world with a heart filled with more gold than his $100 million New York penthouse. Since the media has failed so miserably at reporting the truth about Trump, I decided to put together some of the acts of kindness he’s committed over three decades which haVE gone virtually unnoticed or fallen on deaf ears. In 1986, Trump prevented the foreclosure of Annabell Hill’s family farm after her husband committed suicide. Trump personally phoned down to the auction to stop the sale of her home and offered the widow money. Trump decided to take action after he saw Hill’s pleas for help in news reports. In 1988, a commercial airline refused to fly Andrew Ten, a sick Orthodox Jewish child with a rare illness, across the country to get medical care because he had to travel with an elaborate life-support system. His grief-stricken parents contacted Trump for help and he didn’t hesitate to send his own plane to take the child from Los Angeles to New York so he could get his treatment. In 1991, 200 Marines who served in Operation Desert Storm spent time at Camp Lejune in North Carolina before they were scheduled to return home to their families. However, the Marines were told that a mistake had been made and an aircraft would not be able to take them home on their scheduled departure date. When Trump got wind of this, he sent his plane to make two trips from North
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Carolina to Miami to safelyreturn the Gulf War Marines to their loved ones. In 1995, a motorist stopped to help Trump after the limo he was traveling in got a flat tire. Trump asked the Good Samaritan how he could repay him for his help. All the man asked for was a bouquet of flowers for his wife. A few weeks later Trump sent the flowers with a note that read: We’ve paid off your mortgage. In 1996, Trump filed a lawsuit against the city of Palm Beach, Florida, accusing the town of discriminating against his Mar-aLago resort club because it allowed Jews and blacks. Abraham Foxman, who was the Anti-Defamation League Director at the time, said Trump put the light on Palm Beach not on the beauty and the glitter, but on its seamier side of discrimination. Foxman also noted that Trump’s charge had a trickle-down effect because other clubs followed his lead and began admitting Jews and blacks. Continued on Page 45
Ragged Old Flag Pretty Amazing! by Johnny Cash
She waved from our ships upon the Briny foam And now they’ve about quit waving her back here at home In her own good land here she’s been abused She’s been burned, dishonored, denied, and refused
I walked through a county courthouse square On a park bench an old man was sitting there I said, your old courthouse is kinda run down He said, naw, it’ll do for our little town I said, your old flagpole has leaned a little bit And that’s a ragged old flag you got hanging on it
And the government for which she stands Is scandalized throughout the land And she’s getting threadbare and wearing thin But she’s in good shape for the shape she’s in ‘Cause she’s been through the fire before And I believe she can take a whole lot more So we raise her up every morning We take her down every night We don’t let her touch the ground and we fold her up right On second thought, I do like to brag ‘Cause I’m mighty proud of that ragged old flag
He said, have a seat, and I sat down Is this the first time you’ve been to our little town? I said, I think it is He said, I don’t like to brag But we’re kinda proud of that ragged old flag You see, we got a little hole in that flag there when Washington took it across the Delaware And it got powder-burned the night Francis Scott Key Sat watching it writing say can you see And it got a bad rip in New Orleans With Packingham and Jackson tuggin’ at its seams And it almost fell at the Alamo Beside the texas flag, but she waved on though She got cut with a sword at Chancellorsville And she got cut again at Shiloh Hill There was Robert E. Lee, Beauregard, and Bragg And the south wind blew hard on that ragged old flag On Flanders field in World War one She got a big hole from a Bertha gun She turned blood red in World War Two She hung limp and low a time or two She was in Korea and Vietnam She went where she was sent by Uncle Sam
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And One Day,
HE’S COMING BACK by Scarlette Taylor
“The chief priests, the scribes, elders, and the High Priest Caiaphas assembled and plotted to take Jesus and kill Him.” But they did not want to take him during the Passover because they knew there could be an uproar among the people. “…a woman came to him having an alabaster flask of very costly fragrant oil, and she poured it on His head as He sat at the table.” When Jesus was aware of it, He said, “…She has done a good work for Me… for in pouring this fragrant oil on My body, she did it for My burial.” “Judas Iscariot went to the chief priests and said, “What are you willing to give me if I deliver Him to you?” And they counted out to him thirty pieces of silver. From that time on, he sought opportunity to betray Jesus.” After Jesus celebrated Passover with His Disciples and instituted the Lord’s Supper, He predicted Peter’s denial of him: He told him, “Assuredly, I say to you that this night before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.” And later Peter would do just that. Jesus, Peter, James and John then went to the Garden of Gethsemane where Jesus asked them to watch and pray. He went alone and cried out to the Father, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.” Afterward, He went back to the sleeping three. After Jesus prayed the third time, He went back again, and told the three their betrayer was at hand. “…Judas…with a great multitude with swords and clubs, came from the chief priests and elders.” Judas had told them that whomever he kissed was the One, seize him.
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“Immediately, Judas went up to Jesus…and kissed Him.” He had been singled out for the troops. As they went for Jesus, Peter reacted and severed the ear of one of the soldiers. But Jesus restored it. Nevertheless, they took Jesus. “Then all the disciples forsook Him.” Jesus was led to Caiaphas, the high priest, where the scribes and elders had assembled. And false witnesses came forward. But Jesus spoke nothing until Caiaphas asked Him to tell them if He is the Christ, the Son of God. Jesus responded, “It is as you said. Nevertheless, I say to you, hereafter you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of the Power and coming on the clouds of heaven.” At those words, His fate was determined by them, they thought. But the punishment began: “Then they spat in His face and beat Him; others struck Him with the palms of their hands, saying, “Prophesy to us, Christ! Who is the one who struck you?” When morning came, the accusers sent Him to Pontius Pilate, the governor, who questioned Him and asked, “Are You the king of the Jews?” And Jesus said, “It is as you say.” Although one prisoner could be released by Pilate at the feast, it was not to be Jesus. Barabas, a murderer was chosen instead, gratifying the crowd. And after having Jesus scourged, Pilate sent him on to crucifixion. The governor’s soldiers took Jesus into the Praetorium and gathered the whole garrison around Jesus and stripped Him, put a scarlet robe on Him, put a crown of thorns on his head and a reed in His right hand. They bowed and mocked him. They spat on Him, and took the reed and struck Him on the head. Then they put his clothes back on Him. Weak from lack of sleep, the flogging, the beatings of the soldiers, Jesus was led to the cross, the punishment for criminals. There they crucified Him, driving nails into His hands and feet, and divided his garments, and casting lots, they determined what every man should take.. The accusation against Him was placed over His head: “THIS IS JESUS THE KING OF THE JEWS.” He hung between two robbers. And those who passed by blasphemed Him, saying “…save yourself. Let the Christ, the King of Israel, descend now from the cross, that we may see and believe. From noon till three o’clock, darkness was over the land. Then Jesus cried out, “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? that is My God, My God, Why have You forsaken Me?” Jesus was taking on the sins of all mankind, and though His body reeked in pain, the weight of fulfilling God’s plan lay on Him. After He cried out, they offered Him sour wine which He refused. He then spoke His last words on the Cross, “It is finished.” And He yielded up His spirit. No one took His life; He gave it. Jesus was taken from the cross, buried, and guards were set at His tomb. The next morning when women went to the tomb, a great earthquake occurred because an angel from heaven came down and rolled back the stone and sat on it. The guards saw it all, and shook and were like dead men. The angel spoke to the women and said, “Do not be afraid because I know you seek Jesus who was crucified…He is not here; for HE IS RISEN, as he said.” The angel told the women to come and see where Jesus had lain, and then to go and tell his disciples HE IS RISEN FROM THE DEAD!” There is so much more to the story of Jesus’ Crucifixion, but this is the heart of the story found in Matthew 26-28. What a Savior to celebrate this Easter, and every day of the year. We serve a risen Savior, a supernatural Savior, a loving Savior, a sacrificial Savior. And one day, He’s coming back to claim His own, not everyone, but those who believe in HIM. Are you ready?
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers Many of us Old Folks (those over 40, WAY over 40, or hovering near 40) are quite confused about how we should present ourselves. We’re unsure about the kind of image we are projecting, and whether or not we are correct as we try to conform to current fashions. Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together, and should be avoided: 1. A nose ring and bifocals 2. Spiked hair and bald spots 3. A pierced tongue and dentures 4. Miniskirts and support hose 5. Ankle bracelets and corn pads 6. Speedos and cellulite 7. A belly button ring and a gall bladder surgery scar 8. Unbuttoned disco shirts and a heart monitor 9. Midriff shirts and a midriff bulge 10. Bikinis and liver spots 11. Short-shorts and varicose veins 12. Inline skates and a walker
When I finish eating something I have to show my hands to the dog like I’m a blackjack dealer...
... and last, but not least: 13. Thongs and Depends! Please keep these basic guidelines foremost in your mind when you go shopping.
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Lest We Forget
Is the greatest contribution To the welfare of our land, Some jerk who breaks his promise And cons his fellow man? Or the ordinary fellow Who in times of war and strife, Goes off to serve his country And offers up his life? The politician’s stipend And the style in which he lives, Are often disproportionate, To the service that he gives.
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He was getting old and paunchy And his hair was falling fast, And he sat around the Legion, Telling stories of the past.
While the ordinary Veteran, Who offered up his all, Is paid off with a medal And perhaps a pension, small.
Of a war that he once fought in And the deeds that he had done, In his exploits with his buddies; They were heroes, every one.
It is not the politicians With their compromise and ploys, Who won for us the freedom That our country now enjoys.
And ‘tho sometimes to his neighbors His tales became a joke, All his buddies listened quietly For they knew where of he spoke.
Should you find yourself in danger, With your enemies at hand, Would you really want some cop-out, With his ever-waffling stand?
But we’ll hear his tales no longer, For ol’ Joe has passed away, And the world’s a little poorer For a Veteran died today.
Or would you want a Veteran His home, his country, his kin, Just a common Veteran, Who would fight until the end.
He won’t be mourned by many, Just his children and his wife. For he lived an ordinary, Very quiet sort of life.
He was just a common Veteran, And his ranks are growing thin, But his presence should remind us We may need his likes again.
He held a job and raised a family, Going quietly on his way; And the world won’t note his passing, ‘Tho a Veteran died today.
For when countries are in conflict, We find the Veteran’s part, Is to clean up all the troubles That the politicians start.
When politicians leave this earth, Their bodies lie in state, While thousands note their passing, And proclaim that they were great.
If we cannot do him honor While he’s here to hear the praise, Then at least let’s give him homage At the ending of his days.
Papers tell of their life stories From the time that they were young, But the passing of a Veteran Goes unnoticed, and unsung.
Perhaps just a simple headline In the paper that might say: “OUR COUNTRY IS IN MOURNING, A VETERAN DIED TODAY.”
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers A RETIREE'S LAST TRIP TO COSTCO Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Owen, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had an elephant? So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, (certified), so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I had stopped to pee on a fire hydrant and a car hit me. Well, I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.
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Have you ever gone to bed hungry?
Or have you gone to bed feeling so stuffed that you can’t sleep? Caldwell is home to some hungry folks. A whopping 58% of students in Caldwell ISD are on the free/reduced meal plan. That means that their breakfast and lunch provided for them at Caldwell schools just might be the only meals they get for the day. Caldwell is so very blessed and home to three, yes three, food pantries! Caldwell Christians Care, “In God’s Hands Ministry” and Elizabeth Lutheran Church Community Pantry serve hundreds of our community members each month. Caldwell is now a host site for the Brazos Valley “Food for Families” food drive held annually in December. St. Mary’s Catholic Church Parish Hall has been the drop-off location for the last 3 years. In the food drive in 2019, 14,158 lbs. of food and a whopping $30,000.00 was collected and distributed equally among our 3 food pantries. For every $1.00 donated, the food pantry is able to purchase $5.00 worth of food at the food bank in Bryan. In
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2019, the “In God’s Hands” Ministry in Cade Lake fed their families for one entire year with food and monetary donations from the 2018 food drive held in Caldwell. The Elizabeth Lutheran Church Community Pantry serves hundreds of families each month! The food collected in 2018 was able to serve their ministry for several months. While “In God’s Hands” and Elizabeth Lutheran Community Pantry are open once a month, Caldwell Christians Care (which has served Caldwell for over 30 years) is open three days per week. When an individual or family goes to Christian Care, they must first qualify to receive the food. Once they qualify, they are given a box of food. The day I spend at the food drive is one of my favorite days of the year. Caldwell is the best small town in Texas ~ full of kind and generous people. Since the food drive started in Caldwell, there are at least 400+ volunteers that come to volunteer to sort the food each year. Caldwell and Snook ISD students spend their day sorting food and stacking boxes. Most classes have competitions to see who can donate the most food items. The Knights of Columbus from St. Mary’s are instrumental in the success as well. We are a finetuned machine of a team ~ everyone has a responsibility. My favorite part of the 2019 food drive was when a recipient of the food drive came to volunteer. This very grateful person said it was “the least she could do”. She said she depends on the food from the food pantry and she was so thankful that she could help make a difference. She spent 6 hours with us that day sorting
food. Mark your calendar for Wednesday, December 2nd and plan to come volunteer and see for yourself how wonderful & generous Caldwell really is! Janice Easter *Employed by CISD for 21 years ~ Caldwell High School Campus Secretary *Current Main Street Board Vice-President *Current Burleson County Chamber of Commerce - Kolache Festival Chairperson *Member of St. Mary’s Catholic Church ~ church organist for 45+ years
*Current Chairperson for the Caldwell host site ~ Brazos Valley “Food for Families” Food Drive *Current member of: Burleson County Czech Heritage Society, Burleson County Republican Women, Burleson County Czech Museum *Candidate for Caldwell City Council
Quick & Easy Family Dinners By Sharon Laffere Ehlert
Our schedules are so busy these days. It is often
difficult to find time for family dinner. Rotisserie chicken has become a staple in our recipes. It is a great time saver to create quick dinners. Here are a couple of our favorite recipes. Quick Chicken Enchiladas Shredded Rotisserie Chicken 10 corn tortillas Can of black beans Can of red enchilada sauce 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
Fill each tortilla with shredded chicken, beans, shredded cheese, and enchilada sauce. Roll each tortilla and place in a casserole dish. Top with red enchilada sauce and shredded cheddar cheese. Bake at 350 degrees for 20 minutes or until cheese is melted.
Tell our Advertisers You saw them in the Front Porch Magazine
Quick Soup For another quick meal, save the bones from the rotisserie chicken. Add the bones and 4 quarts of water to a pot and boil to make chicken broth. Remove the bones from the broth. Add a can of carrots or mixed vegetables, salt and pepper, and a package of noodles to the broth. Boil according to package directions. Enjoy with family and friends!
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’Y S DD
Y A D
A D
By: Cheryl Costello-Forshey
Her hair was up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow. Today was Daddy’s Day at school, and she couldn’t wait to go.
But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home. Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone. But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say. What to tell her classmates of why he wasn’t there today. But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home. But the little girl went to school, eager to tell them all. About a dad she never sees a dad who never calls.
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There were daddies along the wall in back, I know because he told me, for everyone to meet. he’ll forever be in my heart” Children squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats. With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. One by one the teacher called, Feeling her own heartbeat, a student from the class. beneath her favorite dress. To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears. At last the teacher called her name, Proudly watching her daughter, every child turned to stare. who was wise beyond her years. Each of them was searching, for a man who wasn’t there. For she stood up for the love of a man not in her life. “Where’s her daddy at?” Doing what was best for her, she heard a boy call out. doing what was right. “She probably doesn’t have one,” another student dared to shout. And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd. And from somewhere near the back, She finished with a voice so soft, she heard a daddy say, but its message clear and loud. “Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day.” “I love my daddy very much, he’s my shining star. The words did not offend her, And if he could, he’d be here, as she smiled up at her Mom. but heaven’s just too far. And looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on. But sometimes when I close my eyes, it’s like he never went away.” And with hands behind her back, And then she closed her eyes, slowly she began to speak. and saw him there that day. And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique. And to her mother’s amazement, she witnessed with surprise. “My Daddy couldn’t be here, A room full of daddies and children, because he lives so far away. all starting to close their eyes. But I know he wishes he could be, since this is such a special day. Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt inside. And though you cannot meet him, Perhaps for merely a second, I wanted you to know. they saw him at her side. All about my daddy, and how much he loves me so. “I know you’re with me Daddy,” to the silence she called out. He loved to tell me stories And what happened next made believers, he taught me to ride my bike. of those once filled with doubt. He surprised me with red roses, and taught me to fly a kite. Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed. We used to share fudge sundaes, But there on the desk beside her, and ice cream in a cone. was a fragrant long-stemmed red rose. And though you cannot see him, I’m not standing here alone. And a child was blessed, if only for a moment, by the love of her shining bright star. “Cause my daddy’s always with me, And given the gift of believing, even though we are apart that heaven is never too far.
The Aging of Mickey
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It’s Not Just
Wine & Roses... It’s So Much More
Sisters Kimber Dowell and Heather Hernandez are the new owners of Wine and Roses. When the business was up for sale, the sisters saw the sign and knew they didn’t want the business to leave Somerville. They had been looking for something they could have, something that was their own. They had been born and reared in Somerville, so they felt it was a natural for them. With Heather’s background in home design, floor covering and lighting, and Kimber’s enthusiasm, they purchased the store, and on July 1, 2019, they opened their doors. Wine and Roses provides many services and merchandises, and the ladies are adding all the time. Wine and Roses is a fullservice florist, with delivery and pickup. There you can purchase flowers for special events such as weddings, holidays, and funerals…or just for that special event. Silk arrangements are also available: seasonal wreaths or that special table centerpiece. Some new lines of clothing include Judy Blue Jeans, Kan Can Blue Jeans; and Umgee and Mud Pie are clothing lines. The shoe lines are Blow Fish, casual tennies, and Mia Shoes, spring sandals. They also have American Darling purses. Their gift offerings are plentiful: candles, Mud Pie Christian gifts, Baptism gifts, and Wedding gifts. Jewelry pieces such as earrings, necklaces, and bracelets, San Saba pecans, Fredricksburg jams, jellies, glazes and salsas, and Texas wines are all available. Heather and Kimber, of course, want to grow their customer base and provide people the things they want. They also plan to get more into wedding services, not just provide the wonderful flowers. They know how important supporting their community is. Heather and husband Tommy’s two children are in elementary school in Somerville, and they are happy to help with the school’s endeavors. They’ve also extended donations to the Caldwell area: the Elementary PTO, and the Ag Breakfast. The sisters say they like to support those who support them. Heather and Kimber are appreciative of their design specialist Janet Oppermann who stayed on after the business was sold. She will be one of their designers, and they are thankful for her. Be sure to go by Wine and Roses at 125 Seventh Street, behind Citizens Bank in Somerville. They’ll be there to assist you.
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I’M A FLORIST I run on Caffeine, Glitter & Chaos
A Step Too Far…I’m sure each of you can quickly think of ways you’ve gone too far in your own life: over-spending on things that you “had to have” or “needed,” committing to another endeavor when your plate was already full, or brimming; saying yes, again, to your child when you should have said no. Eating that extra piece of pie, and nibbling at another. The list could go on and on. In our America, we can think of ways our country’s leadership has gone A Step Too Far. Whatever your political leanings, let’s seriously think about the right and wrong that is going on in America. Let’s face the truth of what is right, or wrong about an issue. What do you believe about Infanticide, gun-control, open borders, peaceful assembly, Socialism, Sanctuary cities? Pro-abortion or Infanticide: even to killing a newborn after it has been through the birth process??? Gun control: advocating taking guns from Americans when our 2nd Amendment states the right to bear arms??? Open borders: Immigrants looking for a better life but disregarding the law. Letting the criminal, diseased, cartel, antiAmericans, Sex trafficking of our children along with innocent people come on in??? Peaceful Assembling: Nick Sandman, college students’ rudeness toward speakers, Antifa??? Socialism: Open disrespect for our way of governing, our Republic; a less rigid ideology of Communism. Open disrespect for our way of governing??? Sanctuary Cities: disregarding the law to protect illegals from legal prosecution and deportation; caring more for illegals than American citizens???
And, you know in your heart, THERE IS NOTHING FREE!!!!!! Someone pays for it! Let us all consider the issues that so greatly affect our way of governing our precious nation, and our individual lives. Let us be pro-active as we are living out our lives…whatever the issues. Stand tall, American. What we have was bought and paid for with blood, whether it was the blood of the Revolution, WW I and II, or any of the more recent on-going battles. Our precious country needs your commitment to the best.
God! Help!
I Need Strength!
My mother was dying of a terrible form of cancer . There was no cure. No one has ever lived five years after a diagnosis with this cancer. She had been diagnosed at the age of 61 and she was a vibrant, happy, enthusiastic, loving woman. She fought the cancer with all her strength, submitting to an experimental operation to give her a few more precious months on Earth. My sister, my stepfather, and I cared for my mother after the operation, as she wasted away in the intensive care unit of a wonderful national cancer center. She had the best care anyone could have asked for. However, all three of us could see that she was getting worse and worse. She allowed herself to be put on life support, with the promise that she would be off it and home again soon, but weeks later, there was little hope she would ever be able to survive off the machines. After long deliberations and tear-filled soul-searching, all three of us decided that it was time to ask the hospital to allow us to take our beloved mother off life support and to let her die with dignity. We had promised her throughout our lives that we would not allow her to be kept alive on machines, and we wanted to do our duty for her, no matter how difficult we found it to be. After days of meetings, the hospital ethics committee agreed with us that it was time to take our mother off life support. I came back to Florida from my home in Virginia and together, my sister, my stepfather, and I stood at my mother’s side, more upset and stressed than I could ever imagine. I remember thinking, as I observed how distressed my sister and stepfather were, that there were few situations on Earth more challenging than the one we faced. Suddenly, I was filled with love and sympathy for the family members of someone on death row, waiting in a room to hear that their loved one was dead. I thought to myself, “I can’t take much more of this.” Then, the minister, a member of the ethics committee came into the room. He said, “I’m very sorry to tell you this, but the ethics committee has changed its mind. Your mother’s doctors have withdrawn their names from the committee and from your mother’s case. They say it feels like euthanasia to them. I must also tell you that there is great disagreement from other doctors on the
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committee who feel that your mother’s doctors are more interested in protecting their reputations, than taking care of your mother and the three of you. We are going to have another meeting this afternoon. I will keep you posted of the outcome.” My sister began to scream and cry and my stepfather turned beet red. I felt my own stress levels climb to intolerable levels. In my own mind, I said, “God! If you have more strength out there for me, I need it now. I need help right now or I won’t be able to get through this and to help my family get through this! Help me, God! Please!” Suddenly I was no longer in my mother’s hospital room. I was standing on the edge of a cliff overlooking a heaving, green and gold ocean. The air was soft as silk against my skin and the light seemed to float around me like the finest cloth. Somehow, I knew in my heart that the ocean was infinitely wide and infinitely deep. I knew inside myself that it was the strength of God. Behind me, someone (an angel?) leaned over my shoulder and whispered in my ear in a kind and loving voice, “Take what you will.” As I stood once again in the room with my grieving, angry family, I was flooded with the strength I had requested. I was able to help us all get through the afternoon and evening as the hospital went through the processes they needed to feel comfortable allowing us to take my mother off life support. Together, we were there for her, fulfilling our promise, standing together as a family, making sure she had the support she needed to leave this planet surrounded by love. “Take what you will” is such a loving invitation and one I have remembered many times since, whenever I begin to doubt the infinite love of God. And one day, I hope to thank, in person, the angel whose gentle, supportive voice whispered those words into my ear.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers A RETIREE’S LAST TRIP TO WAL-MART Yesterday, I wore my Vietnam Veterans cap when I went to Wal-Mart. There was nothing in particular that I needed at the world’s largest retailer; but, since I retired, trips to Wally World to look at the ‘Wal-Martians’ is always good for some comic release. Besides, I always feel pretty ‘normal’ after seeing some of the people that frequent this establishment. But, I digress ... enough of my psychological fixations..... While standing in line to check out, the guy in front of me, probably in his early thirties, asked, “Are you a Vietnam Vet?” “No,” I replied. “Then why are you wearing that cap?” “Because I couldn’t find the one from the War of 1812.” [I thought this was a snappy retort.] “The War of 1812, huh?” the ‘Wal-Martian’ queried, “When was that?” God forgive me, but I couldn’t pass up such an opportunity. “1936,” I answered, as straight-faced as possible. He pondered my response for a moment, and then asked, “Why do they call it the War of 1812 if it was in 1936?” “It was a Black Operation. No one is supposed to know about it.” (This was beginning to be way too much fun!) “DUDE! Really?” he exclaimed. “How did you get to do something that COOOOL?” I glanced furtively around me for effect, leaned toward the guy, and in a low voice, said. “I’m not sure. I was the only Caucasian on the mission.” “Dude!!” he was really getting excited about what he was hearing! “That is seriously awesome! But, didn’t you... kind of stand out?”
“Not really. The other guys were all wearing white camouflage.” The moron nodded knowingly. “Listen, man,” I said in a very serious tone, “You can’t tell anyone about this. It’s still ‘top secret’ and I shouldn’t have said anything.” “Oh yeah?” he gave me that, ‘don’t threaten me’ look. “Like, what’s gonna happen if I do?” With a really hard look I said, “You have a family, don’t you? We wouldn’t want anything to happen to them, would we?” The guy gulped, left his basket where it was and fled through the door. By this time, the lady behind me was about to have a heart attack, she was laughing so hard. I just grinned at her. After checking out and going to the parking lot, I saw Dimwit leaning in a car window talking to a young woman. Upon catching sight of me, he started pointing excitedly in my direction. Giving him another ‘deadly’ serious look, I made the ‘I see you’ gesture. He turned kind of pale, jumped into the car and sped out of their parking lot in a flurry of dust! What a great time I had! Tomorrow I’m going back with my Homeland Security cap. Then the next day, I will go to the DMV -- so I can wear a Border Patrol hat, and see how long it takes to empty out the place. Whoever said ‘Retirement is boring,’ just needs the right kind of cap!
I hate when old people poke you at a wed-
TELL OUR ADVERTISERS YOU SAW THEM IN THE FRONT PORCH MAGAZINE
Drought 2019/2020 –
the Good, the Bad and the Ugly Howdy! Today we are going to discus a topic more geared to the hoofed animals of Burleson County. Burleson County is and has been considered to be in the severe drought category for over a year. Now our watering tanks are extremely low, water quality is poor, pasture forage is non-existent or taxed to the limit and hay, if found now, is expensive and of low quality. This drought is not near the severity of 2011, but should serve as gentle reminder of the things we MAY have already forgotten since then. During our daily travels across Burleson County, it is very easy to determine the GOOD ranchers that did not forget the lessons of 2011. Typically, their cattle have a body condition score 5 out of 9, with winter forage on the ground to still graze. They have covered hay barns with a year worth of stock piled baled forage. The baled forage is further enhanced with judicious supplementation of high protein and mineral feeders. No, throwing a tub of molasses with 23% urea for 30 head of livestock DOES NOT QUALIFY for adequate compensation for the severe lack of digestible fiber, protein, energy, vitamins and minerals normally available in a properly stocked and managed pasture. Animals with hoofs MUST HAVE decent forage that is alive and growing along with hay or dead forage to survive and thrive. This includes all animals with hoofs such as cattle, horses, deer, other exotics, sheep and goats! The biggest mistake I see in this county is overstocking disease. God created animals with hoofs to ROAM and graze selectively, not to be forced to eat weeds, grass contaminated with stomach worm eggs and drink stale stagnant algae infested pond water. I consider these conditions BAD for the humane treatment of livestock and the rancher’s pocket book.
worse mistake I see is people holding on to poor or non-productive animals. Unless they are pets, please take the advice of an old friend and long-time veterinarian in Burleson County, “cut her head off ”. Build a hay barn if you are going to gamble on cattle and mother nature at the same time. You better stack the deck when you can. Clean out and/or expand your watering tanks. Better yet, provide an additional water source that is not affected by drought. Re-configure your pastures so you can rotate your livestock and graze them more efficiently. Have your soil analyzed to determine what kinds of soil amendments are needed to maximize forage production. Improve your pastures by spraying or shredding weeds, renovating or loosening soil and planting winter forage. Above all, plan for the future, do not just react to the current issues. Stay ahead of the game. There are probably many other opportunities I have not included but with a little planning and forethought, a rancher of any hoofed livestock can increase their production, efficiency and income in an ever-increasing difficult industry. I pray the drought is over before this article is published.
This leads me to the UGLY segment of this talk. Animals that are stressed due to malnutrition are more prone to increase cost of maintenance. Poor quality forage or no forage must be supplemented with high cost cubes, or worse, low quality molasses tubs. The rancher will also see increases in labor cost to feed these animals DAILY. This stress leads to poor conception rates of females, increased rates of abortion, birthing anomalies and dystocia. These animals will also have other medical problems like mineral or protein deficiencies that lead to DOWN ANIMALS. Any hoofed animal unable to stand, walk and graze should be considered critical with the chance of death. Obviously, if the veterinarian is phoned, then it will be ugly to your bottom line as well. So how to make lemonade out of sour lemons? Consider the positives during a drought and take advantage of it. Cull your herd. The
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Good luck and happy ranching. Jack F McKemie DVM
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers When God sends you help, don’t ask questions. She hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside. The woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said, “I don’t know how to use this.” She bowed her head and asked God to send her some HELP. Within 5 minutes a beat-up old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag. He got off of his cycle and asked if he could help. She said: “Yes, my daughter is sick. I’ve locked my keys in my car. I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?” He said, “Sure.” He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was open. She hugged the man and through tears aid, “ThankYou, God, for sending me such a very nice man.” The man heard her little prayer and replied, “Lady, I am NOT a nice man. I just got out of prison yesterday; I was in prison for cartheft.” The woman hugged the man again, sobbing, “Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a Professional!”
If you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn’t fit any of your containers.
Real
Life in Never Never Land “Most weeks I spend four mild-mannered Clark Kent days at home with dear hubby. The other three days I am out of town, acting as a sort of Peter Pan for the grandchildren. My official title is Keeper of Precious Treasures. Like the St. Bernard, Nana of Peter Pan fame, beloved, and fluffy, I keep the two little sweeties from trouble, somewhat in line, and act as their play companion. My darling daughter works from home a few days a week. After finding coats, hats, gloves, packing the baby supplies, stroller and snacks, we arrive on the first day of ice skating lessons which will be one afternoon a week. We find a front-row seat for orientation, but the two-year-old refuses to sit. She toddles around, walks in the back of the orientation lady who is standing, and in the middle of her speech. Little rascal grabs skating pro’s legs and proceeds to climb through. I quickly yank her away. Next stop presentation laptop. Our cherub pulls the hanging cord and moves on. I take her out of the room. The second I put her down, she runs like she’s in training for the Olympics. Laughing like crazy, Baby Cakes bolts through the opening onto the ice. I manage to grab her by her pink hoodie, but quicker than a flash she transforms into a slippery eel. I slide little cherub off the ice rink, barely evading my own eel experience. Attempting to entertain her, we sit on a wooden bench next to the glass partition. I stand little darling on my legs. Energized, she bounces to the peppy music. I’m quickly feeling like the frazzled underdog in this wrestling match. Finally, her smiling dad arrives. He confidently takes her from my tiring arms and gives her a cracker. Tinker Bell spits in his face. Ah Ha! A new game! We all go home ready for bedtime, and a glass of wine. Apparently, needing a new challenge, the family recently adopted a third child, Waffles, a one-year-old German Sheppard. While I was away driving Baby Doll to kindergarten, Waffles was secretly in the kitchen, eating muffins, scrambled eggs, and licking the baby’s plate, found under the dining table, the muffin container turned
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upside down on the living room floor. Wonder dog didn’t get the container open, but, it’s only a matter of time before she figures out how to open closed containers and raid the refrigerator. Note to self, don’t leave the can opener on the counter or open the refrigerator when ”Wolf Wolf ” is in eyesight. Toys left on the floor, couch, or at eye level are her personal property. Within an hour of opening presents at Christmas, she chewed the heads off of two miniature dolls. She “drops it,” only after receiving a doggy treat. They recently paid a dog trainer to help them “socialize” Waffles. He recommended a shock collar for walks because she goes berserk when she sees other dogs. For those of you who might have reservations, my daring hubby tried it out on his arm. He said it just gives a little buzz. The collar is also to use when she is in the back yard alone. She barks at squirrels, birds, blowing leaves, or anything that moves. I’m pretty sure her barking irritates the retired neighbors. Doggy broke through the fence into their yard, motivating them to volunteer in sharing the cost of a new fence. Yesterday, while the adults were out, I made use of the handy, little remote device all day. She wouldn’t quit barking at a sassy, tail wagging squirrel. She kept barking, I turned it up a bit, and a bit more, but no luck. I kept giving her a little shock all day. She kept barking. When working daughter arrived home, she informed me, “By the way, Mom, I forgot to put the shock collar on Waffles this morning.” The almost-two-year-old with a full set of teeth bit the dog on the ear. I am guessing the ear was a substitute teething ring. Our smart as a whip kindergartener has only two goals in life. She covets play and having her way. Who can blame her? Isn’t that what we all want? Our little children everywhere teach us the wonderment, and simple abandon of life. To quote, the song, “Through Heaven’s Eyes,” “sometimes we must look at life through heaven’s eyes.” Look through a child’s eyes, and we renew our wonder of the simple things. We will see life anew. Grandmas. Grandpas and aunties know children are where we find the true meaning of joy. Donna Varner Presnal Published Author Retired Elementary Teacher, Caldwell High School Graduate
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers A SHOT OF WHISKEY In the old west a .45 cartridge for a six-gun cost 12 cents, so did a glass of whiskey. If a cowhand was low on cash he would often give the bartender a cartridge in exchange for a drink. This became known as a “shot” of whiskey. BUYING THE FARM This is synonymous with dying. During WW1 soldiers were given life insurance policies worth $5,000. This was about the price of an average farm so if you died you “bought the farm” for your survivors. IRON CLAD CONTRACT `This came about from the ironclad ships of the Civil War. It meant something so strong it could not be broken. SHIP STATE ROOMS Travelling by steamboat was considered the height of comfort. Passenger cabins on the boats were not numbered. Instead they were named after states. To this day cabins on ships are called staterooms. SLEEP TIGHT Early beds were made with a wooden frame. Ropes were tied across the frame in a crisscross pattern. A straw mattress was then put on top of the ropes. Over time the ropes stretched, causing the bed to sag. The owner would then tighten the ropes to get a better night’s sleep. There, don’t you feel smarter now?
Never laugh at your wife’s choices... You’re one of them!
Managing Cash Flow in Retirement
Kavon Novak is a registered Investment Consultant and Branch Manager with LPL Financial. He holds Series 7, 24 and 63 licenses. Kavon has over 20 years of experience in the financial industry and is a member of the Financial Services Institute and the Burleson County Chamber of Commerce. He is a multi-year “Outstanding Client Service” award recipient and a Fightin’ Texas Aggie ’91. For more information please call 979-255-8796.
Except for the fortunate few who don’t have to worry about money, the ultimate goal for most retirees is making sure their assets last as long as they live. Once a person or household no longer can rely on earned income to pay the bills and save for the future, balancing income and expenses becomes the primary focus of financial planning. And because of increasing longevity, managing cash flow is more critical than ever. A typical American electing to retire in his or her mid-60s may expect to live 20 or more years after retirement. While many variables come into play depending on each person’s mix of income, lifestyle, and health, there are a number of planning moves that can help retirees live within their means and make appropriate adjustments in response to changes in income and expenses. Tools for the Task If you are retired, or about to retire, you will need to gather and organize key information before you can tackle the ongoing tasks of monitoring and managing your cash flow in retirement. The purpose is to give you a clear and complete picture of your current financial situation, as well as of any significant changes you expect. Two sources will provide this information: • An up-to-date net-worth statement, which provides a snapshot of your assets, debt, and cash reserves. • Your monthly or annual budget, with itemized breakdowns of your income and expenses. If you haven’t retired yet, it’s a good idea to prepare a projected budget of your retirement income and expenses. Be sure to account for all expenses, including those that occur infrequently, such as insurance bills, college tuition, member-
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ship fees, and investment management fees. They should be reflected in your monthly budget on a prorated basis. If you need assistance creating your net-worth statement and budget, you may want to consult a financial advisor, a book on the subject, or resources that are available online. Analyzing this information will reveal any major problems that you need to overcome, such as insufficient cash reserves for an emergency or an income shortfall compared with current or projected expenses. It may also point up areas for improvement. For example, you may be able to free up cash by reducing debt or eliminating nonessential expenses. Regular Monitoring Plans and projections are always subject to change. Even with reasonable assumptions about investment returns, inflation, and retirement living costs, it’s likely you will encounter numerous changes to your cash flow over time. Frequent monitoring of your income and expenses will detect changes that you can address in a timely fashion to prevent significant problems down the road. Experts often recommend a monthly review of your budget, as well as a comprehensive annual review of your financial situation and goals. While you can keep track of your situation with paper and pen, specialized software may make the task easier, especially if your finances are relatively complex. What to Look For What should you look for as you monitor your finances? Following are potential developments that could affect your cash flow and require adjustments to your plan. • Interest rate trends and market moves may result in an increase or decrease in income from your savings and investments. For example, if interest rates decline, you may have to reduce your expenses if you are periodically withdrawing a fixed percentage from your investment assets. Alternatively, you might consider altering your investment mix to pursue other sources of income, aside from traditional fixed-income investments -- equity dividend income investments, for instance. • You may also encounter changes in federal, state, and local tax rates and regulations. This factor may come into play if you relocate after retiring. The state you move to may impose higher income or property taxes, for example. Other factors that could have a bearing on your retirement cash flow include changes in Social Security and Medicare benefits or eligibility, as well as those affecting employer-provided retiree benefits and private insurance coverage. • Inflation and health care costs are two other variables that can have an impact on living costs and, hence, your retirement plan
Managing Cash Flow in Retirement Cont’d from Page 42 ning assumptions. • Life events -- such as marriage, the death of a spouse, and the addition or loss of a dependent -- may also affect your cash flow. Cash flow is also a matter of personal preferences and decisions, and here you will be in control of the many small and large choices likely to be made over the course of retirement. How much you spend on travel, entertainment and recreation and whether you live in a lower or higher cost locale are examples of factors that can have a significant effect on cash flow -- and how long your retirement assets are likely to last. That’s why it’s worth paying close attention to cash flow, making sure you budget carefully, monitor income and expenses frequently, and take action whenever you see significant changes in income and expenses. Required Attribution Because of the possibility of human or mechanical error by DST Systems, Inc. or its sources, neither DST Systems, Inc. nor its sources guarantees the accuracy, adequacy, completeness or availability of any information and is not responsible for any errors or omissions or for the results obtained from the use of such information. In no event shall DST Systems, Inc. be liable for any indirect, special or consequential damages in connection with subscriber’s or others’ use of the content. © 2019 DST Systems, Inc. Reproduction in whole or in part prohibited, except by permission. All rights reserved. Not responsible for any errors or omissions. LP Tracking # 1-909511
PLEASE BE AWARE of your surroundings
“I feel like I need to share what happened to me today.
While on my lunch I went to Target, the one on 249 and Louetta. I do this weekly to get formula, diapers, etc. I pulled up and parked and got out of my car. As soon as I started walking towards the entrance, a car swerved towards me, stopped and two huge men jumped out, one out of the passenger seat and one out of the back seat, both on their phones. The car was parked behind other parked cars. I was very alert and noticed this and immediately walked fast to the next aisle of cars where there were other people walking in. These same men followed me in, and I kept an eye out and went up to a target employee and told him what had happened and I just didn’t feel comfortable. He told me to grab what I needed quickly and go to check out. I did and went to self check out when I noticed these same two men once again at self check out, one closer to the exit and one closer to the line. I checked myself out while still keeping an eye on my surroundings when one of the men walked behind me on his phone and I heard him say, “she’s right here.” Immediately I knew they were talking about me because the other people at the self check out were men. I finished up and went up to the two target employees standing by the checkout and let them know what was going on. They said they noticed him and noticed that something wasn’t right. I asked one to walk me to my car. We walked out and they followed behind us. I got into my car and they got into the same parked car. As I tried to back out they reversed and tried to block me in. The target employee yelled, “I have their license plate number GO!!” I continued to back up and they must have heard her because they sped off. I am shaken to my core. I can’t believe this happened to me. I am so thankful that Reece was not with me. And I am so thankful for a husband who constantly tells me to watch my surroundings and to be aware. I’ll be honest; sometimes I’m very distracted and all over the place, but today for some reason I was so incredibly aware. And I’m so happy that I was. Ladies, keep your head on a swivel!! It can happen to anyone!!! Sex trafficking is everywhere, and it’s not a joke. I keep thinking of all the awful different scenarios and how bad this could have turned out if I had not been paying attention. I’m so grateful that I got to come home and hug and kiss my son and husband because I know that most of the time in this situation that would not have happened. *The cops were called and it is under investigation *they were in a Silver Volkswagen Atlas YES, we own guns, and yes, I will be getting my CHL! Please share so others are aware!!”
Church Fun The preacher was approached by his small son who told him proudly, “I know what the Bible means!” His father smiled and replied, “What do you mean, you ‘know’ what the Bible means? The son replied, “I do know!” “Okay,” said his father. “What does the Bible mean?” “That’s easy, Daddy,” the young boy replied excitedly, “It stands for ‘Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.!” ************* While driving in Pennsylvania , a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... “Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust.” ************* A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. “Reverend,” said the young man, “I’m so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip.” The minister chuckled, “I know what you mean. It’s the same in my business.”
Trump Does the Unthinkable (Cont’d) In 2000, Maury Povich featured a little girl named Megan who struggled with Brittle Bone Disease on his show and Trump happened to be watching. Trump said the little girl’s story and positive attitude touched his heart. So he contacted Maury and gifted the little girl and her family with a very generous check. In 2008, after Jennifer Hudson’s family members were tragically murdered in Chicago, Trump put the Oscar-winning actress and her family up at his Windy City hotel for free. In addition to that, Trump’s security took extra measures to ensure Hudson and her family members were safe during such a difficult time. In 2013, New York bus driver Darnell Barton spotted a woman close to the edge of a bridge staring at the traffic below as he drove by. He stopped the bus, got out and put his arm around the woman and saved her life by convincing her to not jump. When Trump heard about this story, he sent the hero bus driver a check simply because he believedhis good deed deserved to be rewarded. In 2014, Trump gave $25,000 to Sgt. Andrew Tamoressi after he spent seven months in a Mexican jail for accidentally crossing the US-Mexico border. President Barack Obama couldn’t even be bothered to make onephone call to assist with the United States Marine’s release; however, Trump opened his pocketbook to help this serviceman get back on his feet. In 2016, Melissa Consin Young attended a Trump rally and tearfully thanked Trump for changing her life. She said she proudly stood on stage with Trump as Miss Wisconsin USA in 2005. However, years later she found herself struggling with an incurable illness and during her darkest days, she explained that she received a handwritten letter from Trump telling her she’s the bravest woman, I know. She said the opportunities that
she got from Trump and his organizations ultimately provided her Mexican-American son with a full-ride to college. Lynne Patton, a black female executive for the Trump Organization, released a statement in 2016 defending her boss against accusations that he’s a racist and a bigot. She tearfully revealed how she’s struggled with substance abuse and addiction for years. Instead of kicking her to the curb, she said the Trump Organization and his entire family loyally stood by her through immensely difficult times. Donald Trump’s kindness knows no bounds and his generosity has and continues to touch the lives of people from every sex, race, and religion. When Trump sees someone in need, he wants to help. Two decades ago, Oprah asked Trump in a TV interview if he’d ever run for president. He said: “If it got so bad, I would never want to rule it out totally because I really am tired of seeing what’s happening with this country.’” That day has come. Trump sees that America is in need and he wants to help. How unthinkable! On the other hand, have you ever heard of Hillary or Obama ever doing such things with their own resources? Now that’s really unthinkable! Might be worth passing on!!! Just shows we hired the right guy. If Hollywood, the liberals and the media ever STOP harassing him, Trump will have time to do many more positive things for our country....the good ole United States of America!! P. S. To those who are already Fact Checking, don’t bother...... already did it, and all the stories are TRUE! The Liberal, progressive, socialists want to destroy this guy. The same mindset crucified Jesus.
A New Mercedes There was a middle-aged guy who bought a brand new Mercedes convertible SLK. He took off down the road, sped it up to 80 mph and enjoyed the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head. "This is great," he thought and accelerated it some more. He looked in his rear view mirror, and noticed a Florida Highway Patrol Trooper behind him - blue lights flashing and siren blasting. "I can get away from him with no problem," thought the man, so he floored it and flew down the road at over 100 mph. Then he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this kind of thing." He pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the State Trooper to catch up with him. The Trooper pulled in behind the Mercedes and walked up to the man. "Sir," he said, looking at his watch, "my shift ends in 30 minutes. If you can give me a reason why you were speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go with a warning." The man looked at the Trooper and said, "Last week my wife ran off with a State Trooper, and I thought you were bringing her back." The State Trooper said, "Have a nice day."
ENOUGH with
COMPROMISE
Recently, I revisited an old sermon from Timothy Ateek of Breakaway Ministries titled, “Enough with Compromise.”
God used Moses, a murderer, to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. Can he not, then, use you too?
Compromise. TA would define this as “bailing on my convictions and settling for less than who God has made me to be”, which is often the result of “filling legitimate desires in illegitimate ways”.
Father, may we give ourselves fully to Your will. Use me, in spite of me.
We’re all deeply familiar with compromise. At first glance, it looks appealing. It usually feels like instant gratification. It’s the voice telling you that God’s desires are irrelevant, while your own desires are ultimate. We ignore the whisper of the Holy Spirit, guiding us to abundant life. We exchange that abundant life for brokenness and death, disguised as satisfaction and joy. For a moment, or maybe even more, we think we have outplayed the God of the Universe. Maybe my way is better after all? “There is a way that seems right to a person, but its end is the way that leads to death.” Proverbs 14:12 Then consequences follow. And God’s standard of perfection still stands. We were tricked. God, I repent. Forgive me. And who is our next opponent? Shame. Shame creeps into your soul and tells you lies about who you are at your core. Shame yells, “You didn’t just fail, you are a failure.” “You’re too damaged to ever be used by God again” “God may still love you, but he sure doesn’t like you.” But the cross has the final word. Colossians 2:13-14 says, “And even though you were dead in your transgressions and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, he nevertheless made you alive with him, having forgiven all your transgressions. He has destroyed what was against us, a certificate of indebtedness expressed in decrees opposed to us. He has taken it away by nailing it to the cross.” Shame has no power over you. The blood of Jesus will always be enough to erase your debt and promise you lasting freedom. Compromise will not be the end of your story.
Kaitlyn Dunn, Outreach Director Hope Pregnancy Center of Brazos Valley BIO: Kaitlyn Dunn is the Outreach Director at Hope Pregnancy Center. Originally from New Braunfels, Texas, Kaitlyn began volunteering with Hope in 2016 as a Client Advocate during her time at Texas A&M University. She also completed her Community Health internship with Hope and now resides in Bryan, Texas. About Hope: Hope Pregnancy Centers of the Brazos Valley is a faith-based, non-profit 501(c)(3) organization providing a safe and confidential refuge for those in crisis. Services (all of which are free) include pregnancy tests, ultrasounds, peer counseling, parenting and life skills classes, and material aid based on an “earn while you learn” system. More information may be found at www. partnerwithhope.org.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers A Funny A young woman brought her fiancé home to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother told the girl’s father to find out about the young man. The father invited the fiance to his study for a talk. “So, what are your plans?” the father asked the young man. “I am a biblical scholar,” he replied. “A biblical scholar, hmmm?” the father said. “Admirable, but what will You do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in?” “I will study,” the young man replied, “and God will provide for us.” “And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?” asked the father. “I will concentrate on my studies,” the young man replied, “God will Provide for us.” “And children?” asked the father. “How will you support children?” “Don’t worry, sir, God will provide,” replied the fiance. The conversation proceeded like this...and each time the father questioned, the young idealist insisted that God would provide. Later, the mother asked, “How did your talk go, honey?” The father answered ... “He’s a Democrat. He has no job; he has no plans. And, he thinks I’m God.”
Don’t you hate it when a couple argues in public, and you missed the beginning, so you don’t know whose side to be on?
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A Dish of Ice Cream
The Dean Schooled Them
In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. “How much is an ice cream sundae?” “50 cents,” replied the waitress. The little boy pulled his hand out of his pocket and studied a number of coins in it. “How much is a dish of plain ice cream?” he inquired. Some people were now waiting for a table and the waitress was a bit impatient. “35 cents,” she said brusquely. The little boy again counted the coins. “I’ll have the plain ice cream,” he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and departed. When the waitress came back, she began wiping down the table and then swallowed hard at what she saw. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were 15 cents – her tip.
One night four college kids stayed out late, partying and having a good time. They paid no mind to the test they had scheduled for the next day and didn’t study. In the morning, they hatched a plan to get out of taking their test. They covered themselves with grease and dirt and went to the Dean’s office. Once there, they said they had been to a wedding the previous night and on the way back they got a flat tire and had to push the car back to campus. The Dean listened to their tale of woe and thought. He offered them a retest three days later. They thanked him and accepted his offer.hat time. When the test day arrived, they went to the Dean. The Dean put them all in separate rooms for the test. They were fine with this since they had all studied hard. Then they saw the test. It had 2 questions. 1) Your Name __________ (1 Points) 2) Which tire burst? __________ (99 Points) Options – (a) Front Left (b) Front Right (c) Back Left (d) Back Right
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a wellknown heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike. The mechanic shouted across the garage “Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?” The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked “So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, fix ‘em, put ‘em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?” The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic... “Try doing it with the engine running”.
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Do You Know Where My Wife Is? The other day, I was out grocery shopping at my local supermarket around 6:30 pm when an older man turned a corner into the pasta aisle and put his hands on my shoulder. I jumped up. My first instinct was to get angry and ask him to please not touch me. Then I noticed something. The man was crying. He looked distraught and confused. Suddenly, he asked, ‘Do you know where my wife is? I’ve been looking for her.’ I told him I didn’t know and suggested maybe he ask the store front for help finding her. I was thinking maybe he lost her in the aisles. Hasn’t everyone lost someone this way? I was wrong. He proceeded to ask, ‘Where is my wife? She was right here.’ Tears welled up in his eyes. I told him once again that I was not sure and gestured to walk with him to the customer service counter where they could use the overhead speaker service to make an announcement for her. He obliged. There, the woman asked for a name. He looked to me in confusion, as if I had the answer for him. The woman half rolled her eyes and turned to me. ‘Miss. Do you have THE NAME?’ I explained he was a stranger and I had no other information than she did. “Is this a joke?” she asked. By then, it became really clear to me that this man was very confused. Not just regular confused, but Alzheimer’s confused. Having had a grandpa with this condition, I knew it all too well. I took him to the food court and we sat down. He was now shaking and crying softly. “Where is my love?” I held his hands and I asked him if he had a cell phone. My heart was breaking for him. He said he wasn’t sure, so I asked if I could search his pockets. He obliged. I was careful. In it, I found a small flippy phone. I searched through his contacts and found one that read ‘Daughter Krissy.’ I immediately called her. She answers in seconds. Hello?’ she said, her voice already sounding frantic. I explained that I was with an older man who I assumed was her father. That we were at the supermarket on Lane St and he was very distraught and upset. ‘On my way, ‘she said. “Can you make sure he doesn’t wander off?” She continued, “Thank you, thank you. I’m coming.” For 20-something minutes, I sat with a crying stranger. I held his hands. I wiped his tears. When he shivered, I layed my jacket down in his lap. I gave him answers he needed to hear in the moment. I kept him from trailing off. Because that’s the least I could have done. Suddenly, in walks this tall young woman who looked about 28 or 29. Long black hair and green eyes. We locked eyes and she came rushing over. “Thank you. THANK YOU,” she said. I had to leave for just an hour, and this happens. I knew I shouldn’t have left him. I’m SO sorry.” She explained that he sometimes runs off and looks for his wife. That he lost her 13 years ago, but he never stops trying.
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She proceeded to help him out of his chair and thanked me once again. On their way out, I heard him say once more, “Where is my wife?” My heart hurt, but I was so happy to see him with his family again. I share this not only because this man touched my heart, but to say this: The majority of this world are strangers to you. I know that. But never forget that we all share this world together, and in it we can share kindness. That is the only thing that can keep us going. If you see something, do something. You never know how big your impact can be on someone else’s life. I don’t care that the shopping cart I accidentally left in the pasta aisle during the frenzy of this situation was unloaded and put away. That I had to re-find everything. I don’t care that I ate dinner a little later that night. That I went home and cried my eyes out in the kitchen for this sweet, poor man. Kindness costs nothing. Kindness...it costs nothing, but can mean the world to someone today.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers
A Diamond is merely a lump of coal that has done well under pressure.
If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed. ~Adolf Hitler~
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The Sure Fire Red Hot Cure
I huddled around the pot bellied stove at Duke’s store one blustery day with a couple of the regulars. One of them told a story about a fellow, named Hoss, who lived in Bill Arp during the Great Depression. Hoss was a bull of a man, John Henry, Paul Bunyan, and “Stone Cold” Steve Austin rolled into one huge hunk of manhood. Anything any other man could do he could do better, faster, and longer. He was tough. One time he made a miss lick with an ax and nearly cut his big toe off. He poured kerosene on it, wrapped it with a rag and hobbled on about his business, and never seemed to be bothered by it. The tale teller said he was swapping work with Hoss once, planting corn. He saw Hoss put a 200 pound bag of fertilizer under each arm and walk across the field with it. There were an abundance of stories about his larger than life exploits. One told about a big, bad billy goat that attacked him. He balled up his big fist, that looked like a ham of meat, and smacked the goat between the eyes knocking him to his knees. When Billy awakened he clambered to his feet and got as far away from this monstrosity of a man as fast as his rubbery legs would carry him. Much to his embarrassment, Hoss developed a bad case of hemorrhoids. Country folks called them the piles. He suffered through several bouts before his wife Bessie convinced him to go to the Dr. who gave him some soothing medicine to be applied for temporary relief.
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One night, in pain with his perennial piles problem, he went to bed but flopped around like a dying chicken. His wife said, “Hoss why don’t you jist get up and use that medicine the Dr. give to you? We need to git some sleep.” Hoss, still trying to be tough said, “Naw, I kin handle this without that there medicine. “ “I shore wish you’d do something. I’m tard and need some sleep.” The piles were stronger than Hoss. He got up. His medicine was on the mantle in the parlor. He decided not to light the kerosene lamp (electricity had not yet discovered Bill Arp). He felt his way to his bottle of soothing relief and liberally anointed his offending anatomy. The Watkins man had been by that day and Hoss’ wife had bought a bottle of liniment and set it on the mantle. Hoss got the wrong bottle. He let out a war whoop and screamed, “I’m on far Bessie. Help me.” But Bessie couldn’t help him---she couldn’t catch him. He ran out of the house bellowing like a wounded buffalo. The trap door of his long johns flapped in the breeze like a ghost chasing him. Bessie found him at the well sitting and soaking in the mule’s watering trough. He said, “Bess when I set down in this here water, it jist fried, like bacon a’cookin’, that’s how hot hit was. Later Hoss declared that this he-man treatment had forever cured him. He became evangelistic about Watkins liniment. He recommended that anybody suffering with back door problems take the liniment cure. So far no one has attempted to prove him wrong. If you choose to do so make sure you’re near a mule’s watering trough. And be sure to video the episode; most of us have never seen fried water.
by Neal Beard, a retired pastor living in Douglasville, Georgia. He writes history / humor about the rural northwest Georgia community where he grew up in the 40s and 50s.
2 Timothy 3: 1-5 The Dangers of the Last Days You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that?
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You Might Be A Texan if
1. You can properly pronounce Corsicana, Palestine, Decatur, Wichita Falls, Mexia, Waco, Beaumont, Pflugerville, Kerrville, Boerne, New Braunfels, Amarillo, Pedernales and Leakey!! 2. Your manners include: “Please”, “Thank You”, “Excuse me”, “Ma’am”, and “Sir” & you wanna punch those who don’t use them. 3. A tornado warning siren is your signal to put the stuff out in the yard you wanna get rid of. 4. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway. 5. You’ve had to switch from “heat” to “A/C”, TWICE in the same day. 6. You know that the true value of a parking space is not determined by the distance to the door, but by the availability of shade. 7. Stores don’t have bags, they have sacks. 8. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals, with the utmost respect! 9. You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent. 10. You measure distance in minutes or hours. 11. You hear and use the term “fixin’ to” daily. 12. Little Smokies are something you serve only for special occasions. 13. You go to the lake because you know what a Bigmouth and a Striper is. 14. You listen to the weather forecast before picking out an outfit. 15. You know cowpies are not made of beef. 16. Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan a wedding date. 17. You have known someone who has had one belt buckle bigger than your fist. 18. A bad traffic jam involves two cars staring each other down at a four-way stop, each determined to be the most polite and let the other go first. 19. You know that “DamnYankee” is one word. 20. You aren’t surprised to find movie rental, ammunition, and bait all in the same store... and it’s a drive-thru. 22. A Mercedes Benz is not a status symbol. A Ford F350 diesel 4x4 is. 23. You know everything goes better with Ranch dressing or hot sauce. 24. You are 100% Texan if you’ve EVER heard this conversation: “You wanna coke?” “Yeah.” “What kind?” “Dr. Pepper.”
GIVE AND IT SHALL BE GIVEN TO yOU After a service when I used that verse as my text, a man came up to me and asked, “Do you really believe that if I give money that God will give me back more money than I gave?” I said, “Absolutely, but it is not always money. The return is often money or material things, but often the blessing – the return – is something else.” “Let me share two incidences with you that I am including in a book that I’m writing. I had nothing to do with either of them, but they illustrate my point that the return can take many forms.” “The first occurred in the 1800’s and concerned a struggling store owner in Illinois. He related the story. “I sat on the front porch of the store that my partner Barry and I owned. “How much longer can we hang on?“ I asked Barry. My partner answered, “Looks like our business has about winked out.” I continued, “You know what I want to do – I want to study law. I wouldn’t mind so much if we could sell everything we’ve got – pay our bills and have enough left over to buy a book – one book – Blackstone’s Commentary on English law.” Just then a horse and wagon came down the road and stopped close to the porch. The driver looked at me, ignoring my partner and said, “I am trying to move my family out west, and I’m out of money. About the only thing I’ve got that I can spare is this good barrel that I’d let you have for fifty cents.” I looked over the wagon and came to the man’s wife – looking at me pleadingly, face thin and emaciated. I ran my hand into my pocket, and took out the last fifty cents I had and said, “I reckon I could use a good barrel” and handed the fifty cents to the man and took the barrel down from the wagon. All day long the barrel sat on the porch. Barry kept kidding me about it. Late in the day, I walked out and finally looked at my new possession – looked down into the barrel and saw some cloth and some paper that I had not noticed. I reached down into the barrel, moved things around and felt something solid. I pulled out a book and stood there for a minute – petrified; it was The Commentary on English Law by Blackstone.” Later, the store keeper, Abe Lincoln, said, “I stood there holding the book, looking up toward heaven. There came a deep impression on me that God had something for me to do, and He was showing me now that I had to get ready for it. Why this miracle otherwise?” You see when we give (in this case, money to someone who needed it) God gives back to us bountifully – God gave Lincoln the nation and Lincoln blessed us by saving the nation. And then I shared another “oldie but goodie: “Another way to look at blessings and blessings delayed, and blessing upon blessing from giving.
A college student with no money to pay tuition hit upon an idea for raising money to stay in school, by engaging world famous concert pianist Paderewski, who was touring the US, to do a concert on his campus. Paderewski performed but ticket sales were only $1,600. Unfortunately, Paderewski’s fee was $2,000. When the young man tried to give Paderewski the money and a note for $400, the pianist told him to keep it and pay his tuition. Paderewski even paid for the concert hall. Paderewski eventually became Prime Minister of Poland. Poland was going through a famine, as was all of Europe. Paderewski made the bold move to request food and other resources from Herbert Hoover, who was in charge of US Food and Relief Bureau. Hoover responded and virtually saved Poland (and Europe). A year later, Hoover was attending a meeting in Paris, and Paderewski decided to go to Paris to thank Hoover personally. Shaking hands with Hoover, Paderewski said, “On behalf of the Polish people, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.” Hoover, still holding Paderewski’s hand in both his hands said, “No, it is I who should thank you.” A surprised Paderewski asked, “Why?” The President said, “You do not remember the young college student for whom you graciously gave up your fee so that he could pay his college tuition and graduate. That student was me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.” “Give and it shall be given...”
Del Rogers, Sr., founder and CEO of Stewardship Enrichment is a recognized authority on successful fund raising for churches, ministries and personal stewardship growth for individual christians.
I Dreamed I Went To Heaven I dreamed that I went to Heaven and an angel was showing me around. We walked side-by-side inside a large workroom filled with angels. My angel guide stopped in front of the first section and said, ‘This is the Receiving Section. Here, all petitions to God said in prayer are received.’ I looked around in this area, and it was terribly busy with so many angels sorting out petitions written on voluminous paper sheets and scraps from people all over the world. Then we moved on down a long corridor until we reached the second section. The angel then said to me, ‘This is the Packaging and Delivery Section. Here, the graces and blessings the people asked for are processed and delivered to the living persons who asked for them. ‘I noticed again how busy it was there. There were many angels working hard at that station, since so many blessings had been requested and were being packaged for delivery to Earth. Finally at the farthest end of the long corridor we stopped at the door of a very small station. To my great surprise, only one angel was seated there, idly doing nothing. ‘This is the Acknowledgment Section,’ my angel friend quietly admitted to me. He seemed embarrassed ‘How is it that there is no work going on here?’ I asked. ‘So sad,’ the angel sighed. ‘After people receive the blessings that they asked for, very few send back acknowledgments .’ ‘How does one acknowledge God’s blessings?’ I asked. ‘Simple,’ the angel answered. Just say, ‘Thank you, Lord.’ ‘What blessings should they acknowledge?’ I asked. ‘If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back, a roof overhead and a place to sleep you are richer than 75% of this world.
If you have money in the bank, in your wallet, and spare change in a dish, you are among the top 8% of the world’s wealthy .’ ‘And if you get this on your own computer, you are part of the 1% in the world who has that opportunity.’ ‘If you woke up this morning with more health than illness ... you are more blessed than the many who will not even survive this day .’ ‘If you have never experienced the fear in battle, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation ... you are ahead of 700 million people in the world.’ ‘If you can attend a church without the fear of harassment, arrest, torture or death you are envied by, and more blessed than, three billion people in the world! .’ ‘If your parents are still alive and still married ...you are very rare .’ ‘If you can hold your head up and smile, you are not the norm, you’re unique to all those in doubt and despair.’ Ok, what now? How can I start? If you can read this message, you just received a double blessing in that someone was thinking of you as very special and you are more blessed than over two billion people in the world who cannot read at all. Have a good day, count your blessings, and if you want, pass this along to remind everyone else how blessed we all are. ATTN: Acknowledge Dept.: ‘Thank you Lord, for giving me the ability to share this message and for giving me so many wonderful people to share it with
A boy asked his father, “Dad, what is the size of God?” The father looked up in the sky, saw a plane and asked his son, “What is the size of that plane?” The little boy replied, “It looks so small, I can hardly see it.” The father then took his son to an airport and as they watched a plane approach, the father asked his son, “How big is that plane?” The little boy replied, “Wow, it is so big!” The father then explained to him that the size of God depends on how far or how close you are to him. The closer you are to God, the bigger he will be in your life. I think most of us have a desire to be closer to God. Being human though, we are faced with daily temptations by the devil who works diligently to keep us further away from God. He wants to cause constant disruption in our lives to make us believe that God is small. The devil is always at work and we must constantly persevere to stay a step ahead of him. Most likely you’ve heard the saying that God works in mysterious ways. Well, there is nothing mysterious about the ways of the devil. Albeit he can be very sneaky at times, he is blatantly out here trying to pull us back every chance he gets. It is his desire to constantly tempt us with things that keep us further from God. He tempts us with food, drugs, and alcohol in excess to try and destroy our bodies which are meant to be temples of God. He tempts us with people, money, and materialistic things. He tempts us with just about anything to keep our hearts and minds off God. He wants us to compete with each other, judge each other, hate each other, and to be constantly at war with each other. He wants us to succumb to the ways of the world. He wants to cause stress and turmoil in our lives and relationships in hopes that we grow further apart from God, and ultimately blame God for our circumstances. He tempts us in so many ways and wants to make us believe it’s all normal and okay. He tempts us every day into thinking that it’s okay to gossip, argue, bad mouth, and criticize; after all, everyone does these things. We deal with these things on a daily
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basis, and a lot of times forget that these things are all works of the devil. He wants us to believe that if everyone else is doing it, then it’s not a big deal. But it is a big deal. God commands us through scripture Romans 12:2, “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect he really is.” We are to be more concerned with pleasing God rather than other people. We will always be running from the devil, trying to stay a step ahead. God knows this and so he’s there for us always. Again, he tells us through scripture, Ephesians 6:11, “To put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.” God is, and always will be bigger than the devil! Let us always remember to put him first, and he will show us how big he really is and in ways we never thought were possible. When we are wrapped in the armor of God, we will not only be a step ahead of the devil, but also all that is wicked and evil.
Renita Odstrcil is a licensed texas Realtor. She is a member of the National and Texas Association of Realtors, and the local B/CS Association of Realtors.
Chuckles, Giggles & Snickers
A man is reading his newspaper and says to his wife: “Michelle, look. Here is an article about how women use about twice as many words per day as men do.” The wife responds: “That’s because we have to tell you everything twice”. *************** A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful,” he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!” The wife stared at him. “What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?” The husband calmly replied, “I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.”
Tossed Green Salad Of all the food items known to mankind, I place highest value on home grown tomatoes. For 39 consecutive years I have grown tomatoes for our personal delight, not to mention that of the red spiders, cut worms, mockingbirds, fungi and other agents which share the bounties of spring and summer gardens with us. There are all sorts of regulations about truth in advertising, but somehow they do not seem to apply to those announcing “Vine ripened tomatoes” in our markets. It seems to me that most have been picked green so they will not be mushed into puree while being shipped from California, Mexico, Florida, and other exotic places. Generally, what they are is pith, thus 39 consecutive home gardens around our place. There is tremendous therapeutic value in selecting young plants at the garden store after receiving lots of free advice on choice of varieties from tomato-growing friends. There is healthful pleasure to be gained in tilling the soil and planting the little beauties. Spraying for insect pests is no fun, but that is part of the price we gardeners pay. Counting all costs, including my labor at 50 cents per hour, I am convinced that our home grown pithless tomatoes cost less than $9 a pound. But don’t ask me to let modest cost interfer with the myriad pleasures gained from tomato gardening. A major pleasure in gardening is staring at the plants as they adapt to the cold ground and then during their remarkable growth stages thereafter. Concentrated sharing as the fruit matures nearly exceeds the pleasure of harvest and cold, rich slices on the plate. Almost. Consider then, the following horrible chapter in my tomato gardening career. Spring before last I stared intently at my half-grown tomatoes to be in a proper frame of mind for a particularly stressful meeting about to take place. Later I emerged from the meeting total-
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ly exhausted and with no forward progress to report. It was tomatostarting time again. In the meantime my wife was baby-sitting three of our grandbabies while I was flaying at windmills that afternoon. While resting her eyes during my absence, one of the little heathens escaped to the garden. Unfortunately, he found a badminton racquet unguarded in the backyard as he approached the garden. Swish! Swash! Down went the tomato vines. Down went the egg plants! And the squash were mutilated by downward angular blows as best I could determine. The three varieties of leaf lettuce were more of a challenge, lying close to the ground as they do. But golflike chip shots solved that problem. And there were no strings worthy of mention remaining on the badminton racquet following this crime against nature and me. I do not count that afternoon among my favorite tomato staring expeditions. The vines and fruit looked pitifully lonesome and withered, scattered around the backyard so far from their roots. So did the lettuce and egg plants and squash. I am talking about a massive tossed salad here, and all for naught. There were tracks of little tennis shoes in that garden which left no doubt as to the identity of the tomato attacker. I would know them anywhere---footprints five inches long and four inches wide. Nearly round. I was upset. Many things to say about him, and for that matter, do to him, did occur to me as I realized the full gravity of what had transpired. Thank goodness he had already gone home when I viewed the pillage. Since that very day I have prohibited any sharp-edged toy or long handled blunt instrument from being kept in the back yard. A perfectly good croquet set has been given away. Fallen trees branches are thrown into Bee Creek before visitors arrive. Our backyard is virtually weaponless-a no man’s land. It is, for all intent and purpose, Grandson Proof! With courage, hope and faith, new plants were set-out. And they prospered. Edwin H. Cooper, writer of human interest stories and articles, has been published in many Texas magazines and newspapers, and is active in numerous civic and school organizations. His new book, 40 Years at Aggieland, was published in 2013.
Desserts or Stress! Becky Schenk, born and raised in Burleson County, is a wife, mother to three, a random thinker, deep thinker sometimes, loves reading, listening to spiritual or motivational speakers and volunteering. She is a licensed realtor with The Lone Star Team powered by Keller Williams. She may be reached at 979-587-0059 or beckyschenk@kw.com .
Stressed spelled backwards is desserts. Yes, I know you’ve heard it more than once. Probably even focused on it for a bit so as to bring it to life. If it were only that easy, right? So let’s talk about this a little bit. Stress is a fact of life. It can be big as in divorce, moving, death, major illness or a job loss. It can be small, everyday matters like the hassles of prioritizing your workday. Nonetheless, we all deal with it one way or another. How we choose to react to it is what matters. Everyone is different, so we all react differently according to what we know, how mature we are, how we were raised or how we believe as in religion or spirituality. Keeping it all in was my way of dealing with it for a long time. Eventually, frightening panic attacks occurred and fainting spells. Later, debilitating back and shoulder pain. People, let me tell you, if you think stress doesn’t show up, somewhere, somehow, it does. I chose to hold all my stressors inside causing pain that led me straight to the emergency room believing the severe pain in my shoulders was the beginnings of a heart attack. Thankfully, it was not a heart attack. Then anxiety showed up and, well, let’s just say I’m still working on that with the help of a doctor and cognitive therapy. But what if you can’t deal with the routine stressors or it’s much too big to handle all alone? Don’t be afraid to talk to someone you trust or make an appointment with your family physician first. He will be able to help find different ways to get to the bottom of your stress or advise you to speak with another professional. Many times, just being honest with yourself and asking for help when you need it will bring your mind some release. The world is not out to get you, and your friends and family want to see you feeling well and at your best. It’s important to find small and manageable ways to control how stress affects your life. Leave the office at six o’clock most nights. Go to yoga several times a week. Try to disconnect on nights and weekends (for the most part). Take a vacation and lock your iPhone in a safe. Get eight hours of sleep almost every single night. Seriously. It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses and worries. No matter what happens during the day, as early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don’t carry them through the night and into the next day with you. If you still feel the weight of yesterday’s stress, it’s a strong sign that it’s time to put things to rest. And if all else fails, think desserts.
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* The virus is not a living organism, but a protein molecule (DNA) covered by a protective layer of lipid (fat), which, when absorbed by the cells of the ocular, nasal or buccal mucosa, changes their genetic code. (mutation) and convert them into aggressor and multiplier cells. * Since the virus is not a living organism but a protein molecule, it is not killed, but decays on its own. The disintegration time depends on the temperature, humidity and type of material where it lies. * The virus is very fragile; the only thing that protects it is a thin outer layer of fat. That is why any soap or detergent is the best remedy, because the foam CUTS the FAT (that is why you have to rub so much: for 20 seconds or more, to make a lot of foam). By dissolving the fat layer, the protein molecule disperses and breaks down on its own. * HEAT melts fat; this is why it is so good to use water above 77 degrees Fahrenheit for washing hands, clothes and everything. In addition, hot water makes more foam and that makes it even more useful. * Alcohol or any mixture with alcohol over 65% DISSOLVES ANY FAT, especially the external lipid layer of the virus. * Any mix with 1 part bleach and 5 parts water directly dissolves the protein, breaks it down from the inside. * Oxygenated water helps long after soap, alcohol and chlorine, because peroxide dissolves the virus protein, but you have to use it pure and it hurts your skin. * NO BACTERICIDE OR ANTIBIOTIC SERVES. The virus is not a living organism like bacteria; antibodies cannot kill what is not alive. * NEVER shake used or unused clothing, sheets or cloth. While it is glued to a porous surface, it is very inert and disintegrates only -between 3 hours (fabric and porous),
-4 hours (copper and wood) -24 hours (cardboard), - 42 hours (metal) and -72 hours (plastic). But if you shake it or use a feather duster, the virus molecules float in the air for up to 3 hours, and can lodge in your nose. * The virus molecules remain very stable in external cold, or artificial as air conditioners in houses and cars. They also need moisture to stay stable, and especially darkness. Therefore, dehumidified, dry, warm and bright environments will degrade it faster. * UV LIGHT on any object that may contain it breaks down the virus protein. For example, to disinfect and reuse a mask is perfect. Be careful, it also breaks down collagen (which is protein) in the skin. * The virus CANNOT go through healthy skin. * Vinegar is NOT useful because it does not break down the protective layer of fat. * NO SPIRITS, NOR VODKA, serve. The strongest vodka is 40% alcohol, and you need 65%. * LISTERINE IF IT SERVES! It is 65% alcohol. * The more confined the space, the more concentration of the virus there can be. The more open or naturally ventilated, the less. * You have to wash your hands before and after touching mucosa, food, locks, knobs, switches, remote control, cell phone, watches, computers, desks, TV, etc. And when using the bathroom. * You have to Moisturize dry hands from so much washing them, because the molecules can hide in the micro cracks. The thicker the moisturizer, the better. * Also keep your NAILS SHORT so that the virus does not hide there.
The Front Porch Magazine could not verify the accuracy of all contents of this article. Although we could not verify all of the contents, we felt it was sound advise in trying to combat the Coronavirus. Please stay safe and vigilant during these trying times.
Explaining the Coronavirus
Information from a Nurse at Pennington Biomedical
The Front Porch Magazine prays that you and yours have stayed healthy throughout this Pandemic. It is our hope that by the time you read this article, the worst is over! Feeling confused as to why Coronavirus is a bigger deal than
Seasonal flu? Here it is in a nutshell. It has to do with RNA sequencing.... i.e. genetics. Seasonal flu is an “all human virus”. The DNA/RNA chains that make up the virus are recognized by the human immune system. This means that your body has some immunity to it before it comes around each year... you get immunity two ways...through exposure to a virus, or by getting a flu shot. Novel viruses, come from animals.... the W.H.O. tracks novel viruses in animals, (sometimes for years watching for mutations). Usually these viruses only transfer from animal to animal (pigs in the case of H1N1) (birds in the case of the Spanish flu). But once, one of these animal viruses mutates, and starts to transfer from animals to humans... then it’s a problem…, Why? Because we have no natural or acquired immunity, the RNA sequencing of the genes inside the virus isn’t human, and the human immune system doesn’t recognize it so, we can’t fight it off. Now.... sometimes, the mutation only allows transfer from animal to human, for years its only transmission is from an infected animal to a human before it finally mutates so that it can now transfer human to human. Once that happens, we have a new contagion phase and depending on the fashion of this new mutation, that’s what decides how contagious, or how deadly it’s going to be. H1N1 was deadly....but it did not mutate in a way that was as deadly as the Spanish flu. Its RNA was slower to mutate and it attacked its host differently, too. Fast forward. Now, here comes this Coronavirus, it existed in animals only, for nobody knows how long, but one day, at an animal market,
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in Wuhan China, in Nov/Dec 2019, it mutated and made the jump from animal to people. At first, only animals could give it to a person, but here is the scary part.... in just TWO WEEKS it mutated again and gained the ability to jump from human to human. Scientists call this quick ability, “slippery” This Coronavirus, not being in any form a “human” virus (whereas we would all have some natural or acquired immunity), took off like a rocket because humans have no known immunity and doctors have no known medicines for it. It just so happens that this particular mutated animal virus, changed itself in such a way that it had the potential to cause great damage to human lungs. That’s why Coronavirus is different from seasonal flu, or H1N1 or any other type of influenza.... this one is very slippery. It attacks the lungs and, it’s already mutated AGAIN, so that we now have two strains to deal with, strain S, and strain L....which makes it twice as hard to develop a vaccine. We really have no tools in our shed, with this. History has shown that fast and immediate closings of public places has helped in the past pandemics. Philadelphia and Baltimore were reluctant to close events in 1918 and they were the hardest hit in the US during the Spanish Flu. Factoid: Henry VIII stayed in his room and allowed no one near him, till the Black Plague passed...(honestly...I understand him so much better now). Just like us, he had no tools in his shed, except social isolation... And let me end by saying....right now it’s hitting older folks harder. Stay home folks... and share this with those who are just not catching on.
road acquired the line in 1930 and kept until the 1980s when it was sold to Union Pacific Railroad, to which it remains today. From the 1920s until the 1950s, Deanville had a second siding track that was about a mile long to let other trains pass. It also had a spur track that came to the cotton warehouse and lumber yard.
By: Marsha Kocurek and Tommy Ryan Although Deanville, TX is no longer a stop for any railroad company, the Deanville Depot has been restored as a testament to a time when taking the train was a way of life. In the early 1900’s, cotton was king in Deanville, and the way to ship it was by train. The Deanville Depot and Cotton Warehouse were vital parts of the Deanville economy. At its business peak in the 1930s, the Deanville depot served primarily as a freight depot for cotton, cord wood, lumber, and merchandise. Each train usually had at least one passenger car. However, to ride the train the station agent had to flag the train to stop for passengers. In 1913, the Houston and Texas Central Railroad built a line from Giddings to Stone City through Burleson County, with depot stops in Dime Box, Deanville, Caldwell, and Cook’s Point. The line was later expanded to Hearne. Southern Pacific Rail-
During the days of the steam engine, trains ran at a slower pace. Water had to be refilled every 10 to 15 miles, depending on the grade of the tracks. They were also considerably slower than diesel locomotives. When diesel replaced steam engines in the early1950s, the small depots, including Deanville, were closed. The Deanville Depot restoration began in 2018 by a group of passionate Deanville residents and Burleson County supporters. The purpose of the depot restoration was to restore and preserve the history of Deanville. The restoration was sparked by the legacy of local Orphan Train riders who grew up and lived in the Burleson County area. Information about local Orphan Train riders will be included in the restored depot. Over the last three years, the local Burleson County residents have shown tremendous support for the restoration process. As the last remaining depot in Burleson County, the Deanville Depot will feature information about other Burleson County train depots. The depot will also feature information about local Deanville businesses and industry over the history of the town. The depot is set to open to the public on June 6, 2020, at a large grand opening ceremony held in the Deanville community. To learn more about the Deanville Depot or help support the preservation of Deanville history, contact Tommy Ryan at 979-5354719 or visit the Deanville Heritage Foundation Facebook Page.
hadn’t seen in years. That added to our outing. Next, we decided to take a “detour” through another small town to see how life was there, and imagine our surprise and shock at finding a real road detour that took us a long way around the country to get home. But, and this is God’s blessing, this was the road Hubby was planning to take the next week to deliver a trailer full of hogs to market. Imagine him coming on this detour with a trailer, and having to back up and turn around! A real problem was averted now because of the restaurant not having the food we wanted, and one thing leading to another, to another. Through all this, we learned of this detour. So now, come next week, Hubby will easily take the longer route around the real detour and be safely on his way. What a joy to realize our God, through circumstances, has our back. Now, the biggie: What detours in your life has God blessed you with?
by Polly Williams Detours can be a blessing! Detours can be gentle reminders that our God is looking out for us…that He has our best interest in mind. That is what was on my mind when I began this writing. When my hubby and I go visit his brother who is newly relocated to a care facility due to declining health, I take along old music piano books to play from. I like to play while the residents are eating their noon meal, and while we are waiting for ours to be brought to us in a room set aside for families to be with their loved one for visiting or eating together. The old music book I took is from the late 40’s and 50’s and is in pretty bad shape. Lots of pages are missing, front and back covers are missing. But there are still a lot of old songs that residents can relate to. In fact, after playing one old song, I heard a man say, “I thought I’d never hear that song again.” What a joy it was to hear that response and realize that old songs are what they enjoy. There is a Half Price Book Store nearby I called one day to see if they even had old piano books, and their answer was yes. So, I sit at home hankering to take a road trip to the store and check things out. In fact, the need to go got so bad I was going to drive myself when Hubby was on his own road trip getting feed for the livestock. In fact, I asked him if he would be too upset if I did just that. I wasn’t surprised that he told me absolutely, “No way are you going to drive yourself!” I appreciated his love and concern because he knows I can drive ok, but it’s getting from the car to the place that I want to go that’s dangerous. I am still unbalanced with the diabetic neuropathy in my feet. But he did ask, “Can you wait till tomorrow? That surprised me. Sure enough, we had the road trip, found the store, and looked through the shelves of old music books. Now, this is the beginning of God’s detour for us. While at the shopping mall, Hubby noticed a pet store nearby that he checked out to buy our cat her monthly dose of mite and flea medication. He found it and that is itself a stretch out of his comfort zone. So, I was proud of him to check it out. We then decided to use our Christmas money from a friend to eat out. The restaurant we chose hadn’t gotten their chicken truck in that day, so instead of eating there, and after we ordered malts that were way too high priced and told the clerk sorry, we decided to eat at a place that was on the way home, out of the big city and in our familiar territory. We just aren’t savvy to the big city driving and getting around. So, we ate at the little place in the small town. I had a large salad and he had his good cup of coffee. As we sat enjoying the quiet, Hubby met an old farm buddy he
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“Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,” the divorce court judge said. “And I’ve decided to give your wife $775 a week.” “That’s very fair, your honor,” the husband said.” “And every now and then I’ll try to send her a few bucks myself.”
Getting older is just one body part after another saying “Ha Ha, you think that’s bad
Watch This.”