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VOL 18 + ISSUE 6

FEBRUARY 11, 2016 - FEBRUARY 18, 2016 EDITORIAL

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EDITOR + PUBLISHER Jeff lawrence NEWS + FEATURES EDITOR Chris Faraone ASSOCIATE MUSIC EDITOR Nina Corcoran ASSOCIATE FILM EDITOR Jake Mulligan ASSOCIATE ARTS EDITOR Christopher Ehlers COPY EDITOR Mitchell Dewar CONTRIBUTORS Nate Boroyan, Renan Fontes, Bill Hayduke, Emily Hopkins, Micaela Kimball, Jason Pramas, Dave Wedge INTERN Oliver Bok, Mary Kate McGrath

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Politics and sex. Both beautiful activities, but also hideous in the hands of the wrong people. This week you probably have both on your mind, as the primary in neighboring New Hampshire runs into the hearts, candy, and roses holiday. We’ve taken care of you on both fronts, but I hijacked the reader note this week to especially tout the former, since more than a dozen reporters (including me) from our partners at the Boston Institute for Nonprofit Journalism (BINJ) turned a bar in Manchester into a newsroom and dispatched to the icy front lines across the Granite State to bring you alternative dispatches. What you see in these pages—Trump, Bernie—is a mere sampling. If you’re following the 2016 horse race closely and you want to smell the stalls, check out all our coverage at DigBoston.com.

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FIRST IN LINE FOR BERNIE NEWS TO US

Enduring patchouli and the Secret Service for Sanders

BY CHRIS FARAONE @FARA1 I stared through a glass door at a Secret Service agent who was playing with a pocket knife in front of his colleagues, all of whom were afraid to ask him to chill despite their being visibly appalled by his behavior.

It was a Bernie Sanders rally, but the overreaching arm of federal law enforcement—present around every snowy corner in the Granite State in the week leading up to the primary—was still punching.

I was the first person in line besides a slow trickle of volunteers who apologized for cutting those who waited while lawmen assembled a portable metal detector.

A metal detector. At a Sanders rally.

A woman smelling of a tolerable amount of patchouli cut the queue, which at the scheduled start time of 8:30 am had inflated to about 50 heads. Turned out she was introducing the Vermont senator, and while she wasn’t happy about waiting in the cold with the rest of us, she acted cool enough and started rapping with the crowd.

It was a colorful array of backers, young to old, all trading stories about previous Bernie rallies, their affection for the candidate, and of course rival Hillary Clinton. “What a class act we are,” the woman behind me said, referring to the rather civilized Democratic debate the other night. “But it makes for shitty television,” I added.

A Secret Service agent walked the line giving instructions, after which organizers finally opened the doors about 20 minutes late. At a Donald Trump rally I hit last week, people were incensed that they were being told they couldn’t bring their pocket knives into the building.

On this morning, it was the ban on metal thermoses that had the most folks disappointed.

“Bernie didn’t want all this security,” claimed one woman, shielding the candidate from criticism. “They’re making him have it.”

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It was like a high school mixer inside the gymnasium, with reporters walking through the crowd for interviews.

“Are you voting for Bernie?” “Do you think that he can get the backing he needs?” “Will you still come out to vote if it snows tomorrow?”

The Bern unit was talkative. Like they didn’t understand that TV crews just want quick and cute delicious sound bites to pop into their coverage. At one point I spotted a national news hairdo cutting off a long winded Berniebacker in mid-spiel: “Thank you so much, that’s really great.

Really, absolutely fabulous, just what I need.”

There was a blizzard warning in effect, and campaign workers were nervous about transportation to the polls on Tuesday. “Do you need a ride?” “Can you drive people?”

A younger voter is confused. “Wait a second, if I drive someone, does that mean they have to vote for Bernie?”

The operative chuckles, “They don’t have to, but we hope they will.”

It was cold inside the gym, felt in the mid-50s. A lot of locals were in Bernie T-shirts anyway, but the rest of us who hurtled up from southern throes could have stood to feel some more Bern.

One guy tried to start a chant, “Bernie Sanders—Not For Sale!” But the crowd wasn’t ready, and instead opted for a simpler two-syllable “Ber—nie” refrain that faded in seconds. It’s not exactly thrilling, but you rarely see this stuff on television, where producers often aim to yield a pretty finished product.

Go-time finally came about two hours after organizers started letting people in. The kind patchouli cutter from the line, a former New Hampshire state rep, introduced the candidate, but Sanders had not yet arrived. She put the party on pause, and with time to kill, a Bernie operative distributed flags to the supporters on stage to accompany their campaign signs.

The candidate came out swinging at Super PACs, and bragging that the average contribution to his warchest is $27. “We are treating the American people as if they’re mature enough to handle the truth,” he said. “And the truth is that democracy is being undermined.”

The candidate continued, “You have the power to transform the future of America. Not billionaires. Why do billionaires spend money on elections? Because they want to control it so it works for them … That’s called a rigged economy.”

The senator then pulled out his rhetorical Uzi, leaving not a single lobbyist or money-grubbing goon standing.

Comparing the average person’s plight against the American economy to a five-on-ten game of basketball, Sanders went into specifics, even slamming the Walton family as the “largest recipient of welfare in America” on account of the number of their employees who receive federal assistance.

Then on to the current minimum wage (“nothing short of a poverty wage,” should be $15 an hour), youth unemployment specifically (“a tragedy unto itself”), prisons (“what about investing in jobs and education for the kids instead of jails”), and of course the fat cats: “The power of Wall Street is that two executives of Goldman Sachs became secretaries of the Treasury.”

Bernie didn’t stop at jobs. “Today some kid in New Hampshire gets picked up for marijuana,” he said, drawing a relative comparison. “That kid will have a criminal record, but you don’t get a criminal record for destroying the American economy.”

And on and on the candidate went, saying things you rarely hear from people who are running for the White House. After listening to Republicans pound their chests all week, offering savior to the people of New Hampshire, it was a welcome relief.

“Real change never comes from the top down. Real change comes from the bottom up.”

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There’s a man with a dark complexion hocking “Bomb The Hell Out of ISIS” lapel pins. His heart’s not really in it. The next vendor over from him isn’t legitimately feeling the energy either, his long hair and thick Boston accent a dead giveaway that he’s a foreigner in Trump country. In any case, the prices on “Make America Great Again” merchandise are non-negotiable—for hats, $20 or $25 depending on whether the letters are embroidered or ironed on, and $5 for flags. There’s no bargaining with these leeches.

No pocket knives. No guns. No food. No water. No pepper spray. The guy in front of me snickers at the instructions, and asks his friends to hold his place in line as he presumably goes to stash one of the above items, not likely a bottle of water.

The woman in front of me is the principal of a middle school.

A reporter approaches a couple behind me from Wells, Maine, and asks if they have an opinion on Tom Brady’s relationship with Donald Trump. The guy says, “They’re both winners. I know that. They’re both honorable.”

The journalist returns: “Who do you consider less honorable—Roger Goodell or Obama?” Guy goes, “Goodell, because you’re in Patriots country.”

Then on through the metal detectors. You have to pity a Secret Service agent who studied hard and dedicated her life to protecting dignitaries but got stuck on the Trump detail.

Inside, a fifty-something bumps into the son of a friend. “Hey, aren’t you in college? You should be at the Bernie rally—free tuition!” The lad chuckles awkwardly, then skips back over to his gaggle of goobers.

Trump is the kind of guy who makes loud entrances. On top of that, he seems to have an extraordinary number of supporters who cup their hands when they clap, all together sounding like firecrackers popping in a metal bucket. It’s every asshole uncle from every family in New England, all in one place feeding off mutual stupidity.

Then a message comes over the loudspeaker. It says Donald Trump respects the First Amendment as much as he adores the Second Amendment, but this is a private rally, the voice says, so protest isn’t allowed. Should a demonstration break out, the crowd is told, Trump supporters shouldn’t touch or harm the group or individual, but rather they should stand beside them holding a placard in the air and chanting, “Trump. Trump. Trump.”

An hour and forty-five minutes after the scheduled start time, there’s still no sign of Trump beside his supporters and sycophants using Donald lines on one another. “You’re fired,” a woman says to her husband after he fumbles his cell phone onto the floor.

Trump walks in at 7 pm, a whole two hours after the scheduled arrival time, and jumps right into the rapes and killings being committed by illegal immigrants. In your apartment. Right now! The candidate gives props to Maricopa County, Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio, and then rails about the border, undocumented (“illegal”) immigrants, and the border. “It’s very unfair to those who legally go through the process,” Trump laments.

Then the Paris attacks, sleazebags, and ISIS using the internet that Americans founded to recruit our children. Our children!

Also: Mexicans are paying for the wall on our southern border because Trump “has a great relationship with Hispanics.” He’s going to get their jobs back from China. He can do this in an hour, since “everyone in Washington agrees” that it’s the right thing to do.

Bowe Bergdahl. Then back to immigration. Then health care. “I want to get rid of Obamacare and give you something great.” The crowd goes nuts. “We’re going to make our country rich again.” Add bananas to the nuts.

I sneak out the back.

As I’m exiting, perennial fringe candidate Vermin Supreme and a small platoon of misfits slide in the side door.

So much for the metal detectors.

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APPARENT HORIZON

SASS BACKWARDS SEIU “fights for $15” in New Hampshire while its candidate fights for $12

BY JASON PRAMAS @JASONPRAMAS The “protest pit” outside the Republican Presidential Debate at Saint Anselm College in Goffstown, New Hampshire on Saturday evening was a fenced-in area in a field about a quarter mile down the road from the main entrance to the campus.

Powerful lights shone down on the scene from one side—lending it an eerie cast. Behind the fence facing the road were a couple hundred supporters for a few of the Republican candidates. But that was just the first layer. Behind them were about 500 activists with the Fight for 15 campaign—organized and bankrolled for $30 million as of last August by the Service Employees International Union (SEIU). Whose leaders had bused in SEIU staff and members; student activists; and allies from other unions and immigrant organizations from around the region. At least 13 busloads from southern New England overall, according to the campaign’s registration form for the event.

A respectable showing, if not the “massive crowd of underpaid workers” that SEIU’s press release had promised.

So there they were. Supporters of a $15 an hour federal minimum wage. A fairly diverse group. Standing in a snowy field on a back road, enthusiastically waving banners—some quite creative, cylindrical and glowing from within like Japanese lanterns—and periodically trading chants with the mostly white rightwing activists in front of them.

Their presence was part of SEIU’s current tactic to raise the profile of the Fight for $15 campaign by protesting presidential debates and other high profile events like the Super Bowl in recent months. Which makes sense as far as it goes.

What doesn’t make sense is why SEIU pulled out 500 people onto a chilly windswept hill in suburban New Hampshire to protest for a laudable reform that their chosen presidential candidate, Hillary Clinton, absolutely does not support.

Clinton, like Barack Obama, has come out in favor of a $12 an hour minimum wage. Bernie Sanders, the only candidate whose politics are in line with labor unions like SEIU, is also the only candidate who publicly supports the Fight for $15 campaign’s main goal—a $15 an hour minimum wage. Barely a living wage at all in many parts of the country. Hardly the huge ask that opponents make it out to be. Especially given the wage freeze imposed on most Americans by corporations and our political duopoly since the 1970s.

Yet the leaders of the 1.9 million member SEIU backed Clinton last November.

Joining the heads of a number of other large American unions in supporting the candidate with a proven record of pushing policies completely antithetical to union demands. Like the insurance industry scam known as Obamacare instead of “Medicare for all.” And they have already pumped millions to Clinton Super PACs over the heads of their largely voiceless members.

In response, a coalition of progressive unions and activist union members has formed Labor for Bernie to win as many union endorsements for Sanders as possible. Even as Sanders has amassed a $75 million warchest from mostly small donations—without the truckloads of cash that labor unions have traditionally lavished on Democratic candidates over the past few decades.

With Sanders doing very well in the NH polls as of this writing, and clearly capable of staying in the race all the way to this summer’s Democratic National Convention, it appears that SEIU leadership made a serious miscalculation this election. And the fallout from that miscalculation is already playing out in the very state where they organized the standout for their Fight for $15 campaign over the weekend.

Two New Hampshire SEIU locals—560 (Dartmouth College workers) and 1984 (NH State Employees’ Association)—broke ranks with SEIU leadership last fall and backed Sanders for President. Both locals were present in Goffstown on Saturday.

Whether Bernie Sanders wins the nomination and election or not, current SEIU leadership—and the leadership of every union marching in lockstep with the worst elements of the Democratic Party—is going to face increasing pressure from its rank-and-file members to stop supporting pro-corporate antilabor candidates like Clinton. Likely culminating in major grassroots insurgent campaigns aimed at removing union leaders perceived as sellouts—as has happened on many occasions in labor history. It remains to be seen whether such internal reforms will happen before the major unions collapse under the death of a thousand cuts being inflicted on them by their traditional political enemies and their erstwhile allies alike.

SEIU and less democratic unions like it could forestall the looming civil war in their own ranks—and increase the American labor movement’s chance of survival—by learning from the more democratic practices of the 700,000 member Communication Workers of America (CWA)—whose leadership stepped aside last year and let their members directly decide: a) If they should endorse any candidates for POTUS, and b) Which candidate they should endorse.

CWA members, some 30 percent of whom are Republicans, voted to back Sanders in December.

COPYRIGHT 2016 JASON PRAMAS. LICENSED FOR USE BY THE BOSTON INSTITUTE FOR NONPROFIT JOURNALISM AND MEDIA OUTLETS IN ITS NETWORK.

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JESSIMAE PELUSO SEXY INTERVIEW

A lady you can laugh your tits off with

BY DIGSTAFF | PHOTO BY TANYA DAHL

Jessimae Peluso is a girl we love to laugh with, and occasionally get all fappy over since she’s hot. With Valentine’s Day on our mind, we dropped her an email and got all sexy with her...because you can’t. What you can do though is see her live this Thursday, Friday, and Saturday at Laugh Boston.

What’s it like to be a comedic sex symbol?

Is it stressful? Do you ever just wake up and say, “I’m tired of being beautiful!”

I’M A SEX SYMBOL?? SHUT THE FRONT DOOR, LOCK IT AND CALL ADT!! I never really looked at myself that way. Being a woman can be fuckin exhausting, sometimes I don’t feel complete unless I have a set of fake eyelashes on. It’s a conundrum! I don’t wake up and say “I’m tired of being beautiful.” I have, however, woken up, many a day, and looked at myself in the mirror and said, “WHEN DID GAREY BUSEY GET HERE?!” I’m just happy to wake up most days. Even if I do look like Nick Nolte’s mug shot. Fuck it, I’m cute.

Do you ever regret Girl Code, and by that we mean, does the success from that show suck more so than it doesn’t suck?

REGRETS? HA! I regret NUFFIN! Any success is this biz is a gift. I am forever grateful for my experience on Girl Code. But, that being said, you have to adapt, move and persevere. This business is cyclical. So if you don’t turn with it you’ll sink. So the answer is no, the success doesn’t suck. Success is an achievement as much as it is a responsibility. I owe it to my former broke-ass self to never get lazy and aim sky high. You know what sucks? Sleeping under a bridge at night and performing sexual tasks for a little of that crack rock. I think I’ve got it pretty damn good.

If you could be any kind of toothpaste, which brand would you be and why?

DAMN THIS IS SUCH A WEIRD QUESTION! Are you

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high? Why do I gotta be toothpaste? That goes into the mouth when it’s at its funkiest. Do you not like me? What did I do to you that you think I deserve to be toothpaste? Can I be a kind of cereal? Everyone loves cereal! Kids, adults, everyone. Cereal makes people happy. But NOOOO, you want me to be shackled to a life of halitosis. Last time I checked I’m pretty sure I didn’t kick your dog. But I MUST have done something horrific for you to condemn me to a life of gingivitis.

You got your start in Boston. Is it nice to come home to that or does it make you feel like you’re starting over?

I love coming back to Boston. There are so many fond memories there for me and a few of my good friends still live in Bean Town. It’s good to go back to places that were there in the gestation of a certain place in your life. It provides the perspective and nostalgia that can give you a little boost of inspiration in your current life.

If you could say anything to Whitey Bulger, what would it be?

Wanna be penpals? I’d LOVE to pick that guy[’]s brain! Sentenced to two life terms at the age of 83!!

He’s already served a life term on Earth!! We need to update our sentencing guidelines. LOL! Like “um, yea your Honor, he um, yea, he’s probs gonna kick the bucket in like 78 min. Should we maybe pick something else on the retribution menu?” He should get old people endorsements now. Can you imagine

Whitey Bulger doing a fibromyalgia commercial???

I’D DIE! So would a lot of other people, according to his record.

Your Sharp Tongue podcast is fucking hilarious. Why? Podcasts usually suck so it’s a nice change.

I honestly love doing it. There so much pressure accompanied with performance, so this podcast acts as my rebellious outlet. I like to mix it up each week and not stick to a theme like so many podcasts out there do. It works for them but for me I like to have the option to explore every aspect of this crazy-ass world. Check out the “Farts” episode, it’s pretty epic.

Teaser: it features Girl Code director and writer (and my dear friend) Laura Murphy. She makes fart noises with her mouth that deserve a Grammy nom at the very least.

Social media, especially Twitter, has been good to you. Has Tindr been good to you?

I don’t mess with Tindr. I do however have bumble, happn and seamless. I know seamless is an app for getting food delivery, but you never know when you’re going to make a love connection with the guy who’s delivering your ramen. A girl must always be prepared.

What’s your perfect man look like, and if he doesn’t speak English is that a deal breaker?

My perfect man looks like John Stamos. He HAS to speak english! How else is he going to tell

“... you never know when you’re going to make a love connection with the guy who’s delivering your ramen.

A girl must always be prepared. “

me the password to his heart??? I’M SO FUCKIN SMOOTH! SOMEONE STOP THE TRAIN BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR OF LOVE HAS LEFT THE BUILDING. Or train, left the train. Ok, never mind. I’ll just see myself out.

What’s next for you? Any projects we should know about?

I’m currently cross stitching you a hate letter. But I may include poetry to soften the blow. Other than that, I’m currently working on creating my own TV show. So You Think You Can Shart. I know I can shart.

You don’t wanna know how I know, but I know. We take people from all walks of life and give them time to shine with their true talents. But seriously, I am writing a show for me to star in and produce. I’m also continuing the comedy tour and podcast for the people to keep them ABREAST of what[’]s going on in my life. Get it? A breast? #HappyValentinesDay #LetHimGetAQuickHandful

Finally, are you over Stamos yet?

That depends. Is HE over ME yet? Stay tuned next week on So You Think You Can Stamos? #HaveJessiMercy

>> JESSIMAE PELUSO. PERFORMING LIVE AT LAUGH BOSTON THU 2.11, FRI 2.12, AND SAT 2.13. IF YOU’RE LUCKY ENOUGH, YOU’LL SHART YOURSELF LAUGHING.

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Dwight & Nicole Porch Party Mamas Semi-Good Lookin’ & Ray Hendricks and the Messengers Booty Vortex Fri 2/12 - V-Day Party!

McKENNA’S CAFE

A Neighborhood Eatery That’s Hidden Above One of the City’s Busiest Roads

BY MARC HURWITZ @HIDDENBOSTON

Rock

Sat 2/13 - Pre V-Day Disco Party!

Sun 2/14 - SKA

Bim Skala Bim w/ Plate O’ Shrimp Pressure Cooker 6:30PM

10PM

17 Holland St., Davis Sq. Somerville (617) 776-2004 Directly on T Red Line at Davis

Is it possible for a restaurant to be “hidden” when between 100,000 and 200,000 cars pass within a few hundred feet of the place each and every day? It is if you’re McKenna’s Cafe, a friendly neighborhood spot in Dorchester’s Savin Hill that sits just west of a bridge above the busy Southeast Expressway. And while this breakfast and lunch place is maybe a one-minute walk from the highway (and don’t do that), it is just far enough away from the Columbia Road and Morrissey Boulevard/Freeport Street exits that it is actually quite a drive from the highway, making it a spot that is probably easier to get to by the T—which is almost literally next door—or by walking if you happen to live in this close-knit section of Dorchester. However you get there, you’ll find that McKenna’s is a classic local hangout that more than a few neighborhood folks call their second home, especially on weekend mornings.

Located up the hill from where Dorchester Avenue and Savin Hill Avenue meet, McKenna’s Cafe is very easy for drivers to miss, especially considering that Savin Hill Avenue basically goes nowhere once it heads east from Dot Ave, making a sort of loop in a gorgeous neighborhood that is cut off from the rest of Boston by the Expressway, Morrissey Boulevard, and little pieces of Dorchester Bay and Savin Hill Cove. The restaurant’s location makes it ideal for Savin Hill residents to walk to, and on weekends there are often lines out the door of people who live nearby—along with a few food nerds from outside the area who know about the place. The setup of the interior is a bit awkward on busy days, as the line of people extends from the head of the counter where people check in by writing their names, resulting in many “excuse mes” while trying to get to the signup sheet. The counter itself has several seats where the hardcore regulars can often be found, while the rest of the space is set up with booths and tables of various sizes.

The menu at McKenna’s offers mostly familiar breakfast and lunch items with no real surprises included, but the food is consistently good, the portions are big, and the ingredients used are fresh (probably because it is constantly busy with locals, so ingredients don’t have a chance to sit around like at spots that are often devoid of customers). One of the breakfast highlights here is the granola-crusted French toast, which is made healthy (wink wink) by the granola coating, while another favorite is the McKenna’s Special, a nap-inducing plate that includes two eggs, home fries, bacon or sausage, corned beef hash, and toast. Sandwiches are the way to go for many at lunch, including a meatball sub with cheese and lots of red sauce, a delicious “turkey stuffer” with all the fixings, and a classic tuna melt, while a downright cheap New York sirloin, a spaghetti and meatball plate, and chicken parmigiana are a few options for those looking for a more substantial meal. McKenna’s doesn’t have a liquor license, but it does have some of the best coffees in the area, and if you like flavored coffees, the sweet and rich Snickerdoodle is about as good as it gets.

Like most breakfast places, McKenna’s isn’t a trendy, chic place that everyone talks about, nor does it seem to want to be anything like that. Instead, it pretty much is what it is, a solid eatery where you can get a good stick-to-your-ribs meal at a decent price and be served by people who seem to know more than a few of the customers on a first-name basis (especially up at the counter). If you’re looking for a good meal in the morning or around lunchtime and you happen to be on the expressway, hop off and set your GPS for this totally unpretentious spot. >> MCKENNA’S CAFE. 109 SAVIN HILL AVE., DORCHESTER. MCKENNASCAFE.COM

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FEATURE

DEPT. OF COMMERCE

ARTS + ENTERTAINMENT

13

ARTS ENTERTAINMENT

CONS PROJECT WILL BE ON HAND AT THE ORCHARD CONSEVATORY SKATEPARK AND SO WILL YOU.

14

THU 2.11

FRI 2.12

SAT 2.13

SAT 2.13-SUN 2.14 SUN 2.14

On The Body @ Gallery 263

Pre-Sale Tickets ON SALE @ TogetherBoston May 15-22

Converse Con Project presents DIY Skate Spot

25th Annual Boston Wine Expo

Valentine’s Day Brunch @ Commonwealth Cambridge

Twenties Swing Party @ Saloon

What’s sexier than the human body? Not much.

In its simplest form, it can be a series of shapes and angles, forms and figures, all tied together, or loosely tangled ideas coming together for one moment in time. This, along with the lucid visions and imaginations of an artist’s eye, can create one singular statement. I’m getting hot just thinking about that!

Opening this Thursday and running through March 11, an amazing exhibition by 29 artists handpicked by Ruth Erickson, associate curator at the Institute of Contemporary Art/Boston, this show highlights 30 exceptional pieces by artists working in all forms of media that capture exactly that and so much more. Now that’s amore!

Seven years later and the Boston area still has the coolest, most amazing festival dedicated to music, art, and technology this side of SXSW. Everything you hate about poser festivals with limited access and bifocal viewing opportunities usually reserved for city-hall blah blahs is the antithesis of this week-long celebration.

The Black Madonna, Floating Points, Honey Dijon, Juju Jordash, Fatima Yamaha, Henrik Schwarz, and Palms Trax are just the tip of the iceberg.

Throw in an amazing yet-to-be-announced speaker series with artists and technologists, and anything short of this signature event is just standing on concrete staring at city hall.

It’s not every day that you get to be part of creating something lasting and permanent in Boston, unless of course you’re a construction worker, driving a moving truck on Storrow Drive, or Whitey Bulger, but the sneakerheads at Converse are giving you this once-ina-lifetime opportunity this Saturday. Emceed

by Boston skating guru Evan Kenney alongside skate park designers Tom Dupere and Noah Powell, this incredible event will have you pouring concrete that the next generation will ollie off of. Joined by Converse Cons Skate Ambassadors Tom Remillard and Robbie Russo, it’s open to the public and will help you forget all about not having a date come Sunday.

That’s right, it’s the goddamn fucking Boston Wine Expo! Whether you’re a hard core wino or simply looking to drop mad coin on an absolute shit show drunk fest (Let’s be honest, people get WRECKED here!), this is the place to be this weekend.

Now in its 25th year and presented yet again by those lushes at the Boston Guild of Oenophilists (say that fast with a mouthful of Pinot Grigio in ya!), this two-day celebration of all things grape is a must-attend slosh-expo for anyone who has never been uncomfortably drunk in public. In all seriousness, though, you’re gonna get fucked up and quick!

Is it a restaurant? Is it a market? It’s both! With literally no other options for Sunday brunch on Valentine’s Day, this is your only choice. Thank goodness it’s flippin’ awesome! Curated by Chef de Cuisine Ellie Campbell, this potpourri of deliciousness includes kung pao fried chicken with egg, vegetarian hash with sweet potato, winter vegetables, and good old fashioned scrambled eggs.

Throw in some avocado toast with radish, feta, and olive oil-cured tomatoes, as well as a ménage à trois pork chop and this shit just got real. But wait! They also have AYFKM red velvet Oreo pancakes and a naughty selection of raunchy cookies to go from their market?! Sign me up—but make a reservation if you really want to go. This house will be packed.

Good Golly Miss Molly!

No wait, that’s the wrong era. Um, Swing Low? Nope. Uh… ok, let’s go with bebop skiddly-doo!

That’s it. Regardless of your confusion over what the hell a swing party sounds like (besides keys dropping in a glass bowl and your neighbor-dude moaning while he bones your wife—oh shit, that’s a swinging party, never mind), this little ditty is sure to be a good time.

Complete with passed plates, flapper cocktails, and booty-shaking danceoffs, Saloon’s Prohibition Celebration looks to be a surefire way to forget V Day. I mean Valentine’s Day. Dress sharp and dapper and win some prizes, but remember, loose lips sink ships!

Gallery 263. 263 Pearl St., Cambridge. 7pm/all ages/ FREE. gallery263.com

Together Boston.

620 Mass. Ave., Cambridge.

Tickets on sale now/all ages/$130 festival pass. togetherboston.com

Orchard Conservatory Skatepark. 89 Brighton Ave., Boston. 11am/all ages/FREE. consproject.com

Seaport World Trade Center. 200 Seaport Blvd., Boston. 1pm/21+/$99+. wine-expos.com

Commonwealth.

11 Broad Canal Way, Cambridge. 10am/ all ages/menu priced. commonwealthcambridge. com/

Saloon. 255 Elm St., Somerville. 8am/21+/$25.

Reservation required. saloondavis.com

2.11.16 - 2.18.16

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MON 2.15

NEWS TO US

FEATURE

DEPT. OF COMMERCE

ARTS + ENTERTAINMENT

15

MUSIC

MUSIC

Advice and wisdom from the bold bassist of Warpaint

The beloved charm and Bowie covers of Brazilian musician Seu Jorge

ASK JENNYLEE

MODERN LOVE

BY NINA CORCORAN @NINA_CORCORAN Singer-songwriter jennylee is the type of laidback friend who puts your fears at bay before you even collapse on her couch, where every phone call feels like an afterschool chat—as evidenced by her pausing our conversation twice to shoo her dog from snooping through grocery bags—over landline phones, and where ruminations on intent and fear feel like open dialogues driven in the direction of self-improvement. It’s a strange level of total chilldom, given she’s the bassist in ever-popular four-piece Warpaint.

Who better to receive advice from? A few months after the release of her post-punk debut LP, right on!, jennylee dishes out wisdom on conquering fear, dancing onstage, and what it takes to ultimately follow your own weird path.

What’s the best way to step into the role of a lead vocalist?

It’s not adding cherries on top with harmonies or backing vocals. You have to step up to the spotlight, but the trick is not being too hard on yourself. Let yourself have fun and let yourself go. If you try to control your vocal process and what’s coming out, you may put a stop to something that works. Children don’t do that.

They do what’s natural and have a good time.

When I don’t do that, things happen effortlessly.

That’s what people look for in a singer.

How do you overcome the nerves that come with it?

Sometimes when I get nervous, my voice cuts out or trembles. It’s because I tighten up and get nervous, so before I go onstage I have to jump around and stretch and calm down. I constantly have to remind myself that the whole goal of this is to have fun. The first couple minutes may be nerve-wracking, but remember that it will fade after a couple minutes.

Clearly having fun ranks pretty high for you as advice. How come?

People want to see you having a good time, but they also want to see you being yourself. You’re already on a pedestal.

It’s refreshing to remind people that you’re a human, too. Everyone shits and pees and hears and eats. Obviously it’s important to shine, but what I think is the most rewarding is when you’re as much yourself as possible.

How do you do that musically? The natural pressures of friends, family, or the general public hearing your music often pushes artists of any size to write songs a certain way.

In Warpaint, we always do what we want. If you get a song on commercial radio, that’s great, but we’re not going to sit there and write a song for fucking commercial radio. Writing this album, since I knew it was my first time releasing, the concept was to follow a stream of consciousness. Don’t rewrite your stuff 500 times. Don’t get heady.

Let the music flow and trust in what comes out of you. It takes a lot of force to do that.

What advice would you give at-home musicians who want to make an album but let doubt block them?

Know that it doesn’t have to be the best song. It’s just important to finish things. Choose to write one song in a day and tell yourself before you start that, no, this may not be exactly as you envision it, or flawless, or “normal.” Then do that the next day and the next day. When you get into a flow of writing songs, eventually you know how to do it—and there’s no right way, too. >> JENNYLEE, PALE HANDS, FACIAL. WED 2.17. BRIGHTON MUSIC HALL, 158 BRIGHTON AVE., ALLSTON. 7PM/ALL AGES/$15. CROSSROADSPRESENTS.COM

MUSIC EVENTS THU 2.11

WORLDLY TOUR STOP BAIO + JULIA EASTERLIN + DJ CARBO

[Brighton Music Hall, 158 Brighton Ave., Allston. 8pm/18+/$13. crossroadspresents.com]

16

2.11.16 - 2.18.16

|

SAT 2.13

SOUL FOR THE SOUL MS. LAURYN HILL

[Paradise Rock Club, 967 Comm. Ave., Boston. 9pm/18+/$75. crossroadspresents.com]

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SUN 2.14

HAPPY GALENTINE’S DAY MINI DRESSES + LITTLEFOOT + AMERICAN ECHOES + SOULELUJAH DJS

[Middle East Upstairs, 472 Mass. Ave., Cambridge. 8pm/18+/$10. mideastoffers.com]

SUN 2.14

FENWAY RECORDINGS SESSIONS PRESENTS MARTIN COURTNEY + EZTV

[Brighton Music Hall, 158 Brighton Ave., Boston. 8pm/18+/$15. crossroadspresents.com]

When we’re first introduced to Bill Murray’s boat in Wes Anderson’s 2004 film The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, there’s soft guitar playing elsewhere in the frame. It’s hard to pin down. Several moments later, we see the source of that voice. In a red knit beanie and a thin black tuxedo sits a man with a petite acoustic guitar laying bare across his lap at the bow, a boom mic hovering by his face. The song sounds familiar, like a campfire version of David Bowie’s iconic hit “Ziggy Stardust,” but the words aren’t right.

That’s Seu Jorge, the secret weapon of that film and the overt musical star of Brazil.

Born near Rio de Janeiro in 1970, Seu Jorge grew up with more than his fair share of struggling. He was born in a slum, became homeless as a teen, and suffered to see any financial changes all the way through to legal adulthood. Naturally, he picked up guitar to keep his hopes up. As he began renewing the Brazilian pop samba in his favela neighborhood, word spread, and he slowly became known around the city.

It wasn’t until a decade later when he joined Farofa Carioca as a singer, writing most of the songs for its 1998 debut LP, that he found the course to become a solo artist.

After seeing Jorge’s work as an actor and soundtrack composer in the 2002 film City of God, Anderson quickly contacted the musician. The two worked closely together to have him act as the same in The Life Aquatic. Jorge not only acted as character Pelé dos Santos in the movie, but he provided almost the whole soundtrack, a collection of Portuguese covers of David Bowie jukebox classics.

From “Changes” to “Rebel Rebel” on to “Space Oddity,” Jorge nosedives straight into the heart of Bowie’s talent on the soundtrack. The soft deliver of Portuguese lyrics paired with the tonally candid tuning of his guitar reinvents the songs with an emphasis on nurturing. Even without the bizarre friendships of the film taking place over the music, his songs possess a restorative quality that leaves you feeling healed. And yeah, Bowie loved ’em. “Had Seu Jorge not recorded my songs in Portuguese,” he said, “I would never have heard this new level of beauty which he has imbued them with.”

We don’t need to remind you why his covers are more important now than ever before. Grab a seat in the comfort of Berklee’s most highbrow theater and wait for your frozen self to be warmed by the prodigy known as Seu Jorge. >> SEU JORGE. FRI 2.12 BERKLEE PERFORMANCE CENTER, 136 MASS. AVE., BOSTON. 8PM/ALL AGES/$50. BERKLEE.EDU

TUE 2.16

LOCALLY GROWN AND LOVED LEAPLING + KAL MARKS + HORSE JUMPER OF LOVE + ST. NOTHING + LADY PILLS

[O’Brien’s Pub, 3 Harvard Ave., Allston. 6pm/$10. obrienspubboston.com]

WED 2.17

SYNTHPOP FOR ALL AGES ST. LUCIA + TIGERTOWN

[Royale, 279 Tremont St., Boston. 8pm/all ages/$24. royaleboston.com]

JENNYLEE PHOTO BY MIA KIRBY

BY NINA CORCORAN @NINA_CORCORAN

THE NEW ALBUM PRODUCED BY JEFF LYNNE

FEATURES THE HIT SINGLES “YOU BELONG TO ME” & “BRAND NEW DAY” See Bryan on tour now.

Check out BryanAdams.com for tickets and more info.

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FEATURE

DEPT. OF COMMERCE

ARTS + ENTERTAINMENT

17

1/28/16 2:29 PM

FILM

OFF THE PAGE

FILM

BY JAKE MULLIGAN @_JAKEMULLIGAN

The latest Coen Brothers movie is a backstage affair

BAD DAY AT BACKLOT

On Spike Lee’s latest Michael Jackson pop-doc To split the works of Spike Lee into “fiction films” and “documentaries” does the artist a great disservice, for he is a formalist with more modes than two fingers can count. A number of his documentaries, for instance, are filmed records of shows or performances; The Original Kings of Comedy is one, Passing Strange is another. But in six nonfiction films made since the late ’90s, Lee has crafted another box to store his joints in. The films are 4 Little Girls (which considers the bombing of a black Birmingham church in 1963), Jim Brown: All-American, When the Levees Broke, If God is Willing and Da Creek Don’t Rise (which, along with Levees, considers the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina), Bad 25, and now Michael Jackson’s Journey from Motown to Off the Wall, which just premiered at Sundance and is now playing on Showtime. Each of them intercuts interviews (conducted by Lee himself) with archival footage (of the given subject), meaning that Mr. Lee emerges with a three-sided role: filmmaker, interviewer, reporter.

The last two films among those six place Lee’s cinematic journalism within the arts section. They’re each authorized profiles of Michael Jackson centered around track-by-track breakdowns of a given album. Journey from Motown to Off the Wall saves that approach for the second half, beginning with a scattershot portrait of Michael Jackson as a young man where Lee presents him as an artist trapped within his own career. Deprived of his ability to do so with composition, the director does all his editorializing in the editing room: The live-wire opening mixes and matches footage of early Jackson 5 performances with clips of an older Michael still dutifully performing favorites like “I Want You Back” in concert, implicitly positioning Jackson as a mature artist ensnared by the cultural value of his youthful efforts. And the people who are here to comment—which includes Michael’s parents, his brother Marlon, and Motown executive Berry Gordy, as well as fans ranging from Rosie Perez to Kobe Bryant to Questlove to the Weeknd to Gene Kelly—all have nothing but profound praise for the singer’s talents. The split from Motown may earn placement in the film’s title, but the reasons it happened are left almost entirely to the subtext. Whenever a subject of potential sensitivity is broached, we’re soon on to the next one. The editorializing rarely serves a narrative other than “MJ was the greatest.” It’s fitting that these two Lee-studying-Jackson movies are sold exclusively at the official website of Michael Jackson.

What remains, when you remove anything that might offend the more delicate sensibilities of the Jackson estate, is a film of historical digressions. The opening half dances its way through the 1970s, sliding back then forth then back again, presenting a number of riffs—the subjects interviewed comment on the New York City music scene of the era, the production of The Wiz, and the cultural phenomenon that was Ben, to provide but three examples—that put the Off The Wall album into a sociocultural context. The second half, which matches the structure of Bad 25 by going through Off the Wall track by track and collecting comments based on the individual songs, is comparably tangential: “Rock with You” leads to a conversation about the American roller-skating fad; “She’s Out of My Life” leads to clips and comments taken from Eddie

BY JAKE MULLIGAN @_JAKEMULLIGAN

Murphy: Delirious. What Lee’s crafted, in lieu of a comprehensive biography or timeline, is a cultural spiderweb: a record of the places that Jackson’s artistry emerged from and of the other artists who splintered out of his shadow.

The question this all begs, then, is what separates Lee’s investigatory nonfiction films from other documentaries made out of talking heads and testimonials. The first mark is aesthetic: rhythm, glorious rhythm. Just as Lee has his trademark techniques within fiction (say, the way he often “replays” a single hug or handshake, showing it from two or three angles), he’s developed hands to play in nonfiction. Each sequence cuts between interview subjects and clips at a pace relevant to the given substory, but it slowly and imperceptibly builds up to the few moments where all the subjects agree on a topic—at which point Lee piles all their answers on top of one another, as if printing a headline in large-type font.

Here, that happens when everybody just can’t help but start humming and tapping to the hooks of “Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)” and “Don’t Stop ’Til You Get Enough.” At those moments, when everybody is orating over one another, rushing through at a rapid clip, these Lee-directed nonfiction films literalize their theoretical approach: It’s a cacophony of disparate voices.

The other quality that separates these six films from legions of sleep-inducing social-issue documentaries is Lee’s dedicated aversion to using his subject’s quotes as a prop for a chosen thesis. The scattershot of Michael Jackson’s Journey is a defiantly anti-narrative conceit, one that refuses to paint the past with broad strokes: Rather than structuring all the quotes around a heavily massaged “narrative,” the film defers to exploring the subject’s comments on their own terms, in greater depth than would otherwise be allowed (if this weren’t the case, you wouldn’t have heard anything about roller skating). As in the New Orleans documentaries—which end up creating a record of 20th-century black Southern diction, in what is among the grandest accomplishments in the career of this essential American artist—the commentary offered here is the end, and not the means. Spike Lee might have the byline, but the people in these films speak for themselves. He’s writing history with voices and making voices into history.

DeeAnna Moran (Scarlett Johansson) emerges from underwater to reveal herself a mermaid queen. Then we find her in a disreputable man’s office, clad in the standard-issue femme fatale uniform, smoking a cigarette and seducing her mark.

Joel and Ethan Coen’s Hail, Caesar! is a skit-based trip across a movie studio’s lot circa sometime in the ’50s, set across one day and including visits to film shoots of all sorts, which allows the brothers to indulge in absurdist and anachronistic recreations of at least five different semi-obscure subgenres. But in point of fact, only one of those two Moran costumes was worn on a movie set. Pliability among movie stars, and among the planes of reality, is the touchstone of this universe: Even “reality” looks like the movie of the past, even day is shot for night. Meanwhile, continuing the anachronisms, the Coens’ script allows the worst fears of the midcentury left and right to be literally realized. For the latter, there is a crew of communist screenwriters who are smuggling leftist subtexts into films by day and kidnapping movie stars like Baird Whitlock (George Clooney) by night. For the former, there is Eddie Mannix (Josh Brolin), head of physical production at Capitol Pictures, who bypasses laws and smuggles cash, all to keep his studio’s scandals unreported and its cash flow consistent, rendering himself the personification of every rumor and myth about the era’s ruthless producers. “I’m not really a student of history,” Baird concedes to his captors, while clad in the dress of a period film. That’s probably meant as a metatextual admission of guilt, but we forgive the transgression, given that Hail, Caesar! is a student of movies instead.

>> MICHAEL JACKSON’S JOURNEY FROM MOTOWN TO OFF THE WALL. NOT RATED. AVAILABLE FOR STREAMING VIA SHOWTIME ANYTIME UNTIL 2.29. BLU-RAY/DVD AVAILABLE AT MICHAELJACKSON.COM >> HAIL, CAESAR! RATED PG-13. NOW PLAYING.

FILM EVENTS THU 2.11

FRI 2.12

SAT 2.13

[Brattle Theatre. 40 Brattle St., Harvard Sq., Cambridge.

9:45pm/R/$9-11. 35mm. brattlefilm.org]

[Brattle Theatre. 40 Brattle St., Harvard Sq., Cambridge. 4, 6, and 8pm/NR/$9-11. 35mm.

Looney Tunes programs are at the Brattle through 2.21. brattlefilm.org]

[Brattle Theatre. 40 Brattle St., Harvard Sq., Cambridge.

Midnight/X/$9-11. 35mm. brattlefilm.org]

WILL SMITH IN TONY SCOTT’S ENEMY OF THE STATE

18

2.11.16 - 2.18.16

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THE BUGS BUNNY FILM FESTIVAL ALL BUGS REVIEW

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DARIO ARGENTO’S WITCHY MASTERPIECE SUSPIRIA

‘HIGHWAYS TO HELL’ KEEPS ROLLING AT THE COOLIDGE ROAD GAMES

[Coolidge Corner Theatre.

290 Harvard St., Brookline.

Midnight/PG/$11.25. 35mm. coolidge.org]

SUN 2.14

‘INNOCENCE ABROAD’ CONTINUES AT THE HFA BOY ON A DOLPHIN

[Harvard Film Archive.

24 Quincy St., Harvard Sq., Cambridge. 4:30pm/ NR/$7-9. 35mm. hcl. harvard.edu/hfa]

MON 2.15

BIG SCREEN CLASSICS PRESENTS AMÉLIE

[Coolidge Corner Theatre.

290 Harvard St., Brookline.

7pm/R/$11.25. 35mm. coolidge.org]

MICHAEL MOORE IS BACK TO ACTUALLY

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19

ARTS

CHILDREN WILL LISTEN Actress Jasmine Carmichael chats about Kirsten Greenidge’s Milk Like Sugar

261 MAIN ST., WORCESTER, MA

BY CHRISTOPHER EHLERS @_CHRISEHLERS

JUST ANNOUNCED!

FRIDAY, MARCH 25

THURSDAY, APRIL 7

THU 2/11 8PM

COMEDY

NIGHT Comedy Hosts: Tyler Gist & Anjan Biswas FRI 2/12 10PM

PVRPLE Knife, Amadeezy, DJ Frank White + super smash broz.

DIRTY SOUTH, CRUNK, TRAP, TRILL, CHOPPED N SCREWED, DIPSET SAT 2/13 9:30PM

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 26

DARK CITY BASS VS. RED LIGHT SPECIAL Jakes (Hench Recordings), Symetrex, Terraphorm, Mista Manc, Stylyze, Maverick, Iceman+ DJ Real P GRIME, FUTURE BASS+ HIP HOP, TRAP, PARTY JAMS & REGGAE

FRI. & SAT. APRIL 15 & 16

WED 2/17 10PM

TRINITY Shahin , Matt Foley TECHNO AND EDM

SUNDAY, APRIL 17

SATURDAY, MAY 14 2/13 2/13 2/19 2/19 2/24 2/24 3/5 3/5 3/6 3/6 3/11 3/11

FLESHGOD FLESHGOD APOCALYPSE APOCALYPSE SOUTHSIDE SOUTHSIDE SUICIDE SUICIDE TOUR TOUR FT. FT. POUYA POUYA II SEE SEE STARS STARS CHELSEA CHELSEA GRIN GRIN SECRETS SECRETS THE THE WORD WORD ALIVE ALIVE

All shows, All ages. Tickets available in person at the Palladium Box Office, FYE Music and Video Stores, online at Ticketfly.com or by phone at 877-987-6487.

www.thepalladium.net 20

2.11.16 - 2.18.16

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THU 2/18 10PM

SWEAT Thurmon Green, and BIG GAL TING (djs EARTHACLIT & CreamyKitten )

Winner of a 2012 Obie Award for playwriting, Kirsten Greenidge’s Milk Like Sugar has finally arrived in Boston with a stylish and absorbing production at the Huntington Theatre Company.

Milk Like Sugar is about three 16-year-old girls who enter into a pregnancy pact that they believe will guarantee a bright future for them. Bright, anyway, as measured by material possessions that they think go hand in hand with having both a baby and a baby daddy.

At the center of the play is Annie, a bright and curious yet impressionable girl who, unlike her friends Talisha and Margie, still has one foot in childhood.

She begins to question the plan and wonder if there’s not something better for her out there. Her complicated relationship with her bitter mother, Myrna, only makes things murkier for Annie.

Greenidge has written a play that is both captivating and stark, exploring beautifully the impossibility of unequipped young girls making real, big decisions. It is a reminder that not all of us are lucky enough to have people to look up to and that sometimes just having the audacity to dream takes an enormous amount of courage.

I saw Milk Like Sugar last night. I have to say, I was shocked when I looked at your bio and noticed that you were not really 16. You really tap into everything that a 16-year-old girl embodies. I’m so impressed by how you were able to pull that off, so congratulations.

Thank you so much! Thank you.

I was unprepared for how sad the show actually was to me. I found that I had confidence in Annie very early on, and to see her struggle with some big decisions throughout the play was riveting but heartbreaking.

So much of the end of the play takes place in the span of one day or one night, really. So it’s just this roller coaster of stuff that happens where all of the sudden all these possibilities have fallen away and Annie was just looking for something to feel good. That’s something very human that we all do.

What has been your biggest challenge with bringing Annie to life?

My director [M. Bevin O’Gara] said one day, “At 16 you’re all at once invincible and completely vulnerable.” So getting to that point has been the biggest challenge, I think.

How has it been having Kirsten Greenidge there for the whole process?

It’s been awesome. First of all, Kirsten is just such a brilliant, brilliant writer. Her words, when you just give in to them, make it really easy to understand these girls and all of these characters. We’re happy when we see her come in; we want her to be there.

What has been the most fulfilling thing for you so far?

Honestly, last night when I got to talk to those 16-year-old girls. That was the most fulfilling part for me. They really connected to the show and they really saw themselves in that character. To know that they saw something and that it will stick with them, that was really awesome and so fulfilling. I’ve been thinking about them all last night and today, ’cause that’s who we really do it for. That’s all that you’re hoping for. And to be able to do that is such a gift. >> MILK LIKE SUGAR. RUNS THROUGH 2.27 AT THE HUNTINGTON THEATRE COMPANY AT THE BCA. 527 TREMONT ST., BOSTON. HUNTINGTONTHEATRE.ORG

PHOTO BY T CHARLES ERICKSON

SATURDAY, MAY 21

touchperformanceart.com

THURSDAYS & FRIDAYS

FRIDAY FEBRUARY 12

FEB. 18 - MAR. 4

EDM dance party meets theater

DOORS @ 7:30PM

Searching for

A THEATER EXPERIENCE

INFUSING DIALOGUE, DANCE, & VIDEO.

clubOBERON.com

A.R.T.’s club OBERON 2 ARROW ST. HARVARD SQ.

touchperformanceart.com

18+ TO ENTER 21+ TO DRINK

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21

SAVAGE LOVE

TOP TO BOTTOM ADVICE

WHAT'S FOR BREAKFAST

BY PATT KELLEY WHATS4BREAKFAST.COM

BY DAN SAVAGE @FAKEDANSAVAGE | MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET I’m a 24-year-old gay male. My boyfriend and I have been together for just over a year.

I have a hang-up when it comes to anal sex. I like bottoming, and I’ve had my fair share of great experiences, but I’ve bottomed only once with my boyfriend. I think I’ve identified why: The ceremonies around anal sex (the lube and condoms part) turn me off due to the smell of the lube and the sound of the condom wrapper.

It brings up memories of times when I didn’t have a great time bottoming. Additionally, he is a little bigger than most, so there’s that. What do you suggest? Would it be as simple as finding a lube that doesn’t smell so much? When I top him, which is something we both enjoy, there isn’t a problem.

Wants Anal Now, Goddamnit!

Usually when someone complains about an unpleasant smell associated with anal sex… lube isn’t the issue. But that’s an easily solved problem, WANG, so easily solved that you bundled the answer up with your question: There are 10 million brands of lube on the market, kiddo. Shop around until you find one that doesn’t offend your nostrils.

As for the condom-wrapper issue, try opening condoms 10 or 20 minutes in advance. Condoms are likelier to be an interruption—one that derails hot butt sex—if you wait until the split second before penetration to bust one out.

Open condom packets early, WANG, and put the condom on the BF during foreplay. That way, if the fumbling deflates your bottom-boner (which is a state of mind), you’ll have time to make out, roll around, rim each other, stroke yourself— whatever it takes to get your bottom-boner back.

To get a handle on your performance anxiety and those negative associations—bad memories of lousy experiences, fear of your boyfriend’s big ol’ dick, concerns about whether you’ll have to bail—get some butt toys of varying sizes, and use ’em when you’re alone. With no boyfriend around to disappoint, the penetration will be about your pleasure. In a month or two, with a little effort and non-stinky lube, you’ll have built up a store of positive associations and gained some confidence.

And finally, WANG, if nothing works… maybe you’re a top?

On the Lovecast, Dan chats with the amazing Midori about how to get your dom on: savagelovecast.com.

THE STRANGERER

BY PAT FALCO ILLFALCO.COM

22

2.11.16 - 2.18.16

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OUR VALUED CUSTOMERS

BY TIM CHAMBERLAIN OURVC.NET

THE 2016 NEW ENGLAND

CANNABIS

CONVENTION

The largest MMJ, Cannabis, And Hemp Industry event in the Northeast

April 23rd & 24th, 2016 The Hynes Convention Center Boston Tickets now on sale

NECANN.com

OVER 120 INDUSTRY VENDORS:

Health Care providers, growing equipment, lab testing, information services, growers, teachers, security, career opportunities, and the best smoking, vaping, and dabbing accessories available for purchase!

80 EXPERT SPEAKERS COVERING FOUR PROGRAMMING TRACKS:

Careers & investment, Live Demos, Marijuana as Medicine, and Opportunities in Hemp. Plus the 1st Annual N.E. Cannabis Film Festival!

NECANN is a MUST ATTEND if you want to be part of the FASTEST growing industry in the U.S.!

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BOWERY BOSTON

For show announcements, giveaways, contests, and more, follow us on:

WWW.BOWERYBOSTON.COM • • • • LIVE MUSIC IN AND AROUND BOSTON • • • •

ROYALE 279 Tremont St. Boston, MA • royaleboston.com/concerts RON POPE + THE NIGHTHAWKS DUE TO DEMAND, SECOND SHOW ADDED

W/ TRUETT, JONATHAN TYLER

SAT. FEBRUARY 20

SUN. FEBRUARY 21

FRI. FEBRUARY 19 - SOLD OUT ON SALE FRIDAY AT NOON!

THURS. FEBRUARY 25

KYLE KINANE

W/ CFM

W/ AUSTIN PLAINE, JARED HART

TUESDAY, MARCH 1

FRIDAY, MARCH 11

SUNDAY, MARCH 13

FRIDAY, APRIL 1

SATURDAY, APRIL 2

TUESDAY, APRIL 12

PETE Yung YORN Lean

THURSDAY, MARCH 17

SUNDAY, MARCH 20

52 Church St. Cambridge, MA

MONDAY, MARCH 21

The Chuck Ragan &Camaraderie

W/ CAYETANA, MIKEY ERG

W/ CORY BRANAN, MARK LIND

sinclaircambridge.com

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 17

PIMPS OF JOYTIME Joe Pug / Mandolin Orange W/ VAN GORDON MARTIN BAND

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 19

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 25 (EARLY)

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 18

W/ K A R M A K I D

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 25 (LATE)

SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 27 ON SALE NOW!

FRIDAY, MARCH 4

W/ ARTIFAKTS TUESDAY, MARCH 1

THURSDAY, MARCH 3

ON SALE FRIDAY AT NOON!

ON SALE NOW!

JULIEN BAKER

TUESDAY, MARCH 22

ON SALE FRIDAY AT NOON!

THURSDAY, MAY 12

W/ PRIESTS, URSULA

ON SALE FRIDAY AT 1:00PM!

SUNDAY, APRIL 24

WEDNESDAY, MAY 4

MONDAY, MAY 9

ON SALE FRIDAY AT NOON!

ON SALE NOW!

ON SALE FRIDAY AT 11AM!

(L I VE) SUNDAY, MAY 15

MONDAY, MAY 16

ON SALE NOW!

LANY TUESDAY, MAY 17

FAMILY AND FRIENDS

W/ FLORIST, KAL MARKS, BRITTLE BRIAN

W/ NEMES

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14

THURSDAY, MAY 19

M ASS G OT H I C W/ MAZED, PHILOSPHICAL ZOMBIE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 19

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 24

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 25

1222 Comm. Ave. Allston, MA

RADIATION CITY

JULIA HOLTER

LUKE RATHBORNE

greatscottboston.com

W/ DEEP SEA DIVER, ABADABAD

W/ CIRCUIT DES YEUX

W/ JOY AGAIN

FRIDAY, MARCH 4

SUNDAY, MARCH 6

TUESDAY, MARCH 8

FRIDAYS AT 7PM!

‘s S GA E TH

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 28

ROB CROW’S GLOOMY PLACE W/ PALM, ANIMAL FLAG WEDNESDAY, MARCH 9

W/ PLASTIC PLATES FRIDAY, MARCH 11

ON SALE FRIDAY AT NOON! TUESDAY, MARCH 15

KEVIN MORBY W/ JAYE BARTELL SUNDAY, JUNE 19

≠ 2/12 PETTY MORALS ≠ 2/13 AMINALS ≠ 2/16 PLASTIC WAVES ≠ 2/20 NORMAL INSTRUMENTS ≠ 2/21 AUDIO SOCIAL DISSENT 2016 ≠ 2/26 TOWNSHIP ≠ 3/7 NAP EYES ≠ 3/10 BENT SHAPES ON SALE NOW!

OTHER SHOWS AROUND TOWN:

ON SALE FRIDAY AT 10AM!

ON SALE NOW!

JOSEPH R E SC H E D U L E D FR O M 4 / 2 3 G R E AT SC O TT

THU. MARCH 3 MIDDLE EAST UP

SUN. MARCH 6 MIDDLE EAST DOWN

FRI. APRIL 29 RED ROOM AT CAFE 939

Tickets for Royale, The Sinclair, and Great Scott can be purchased online at Ticketmaster.com or by phone at (800) 745-3000.

No fee tickets available at The Sinclair box office Wednesdays - Saturdays 12:00 - 7:00PM

SAT. APRIL 30 MIDDLE EAST DOWN

THURSDAY, MAY 5 MIDDLE EAST UP

FOR MORE INFORMATION AND A COMPLETE LIST OF SHOWS, VISIT BOWERYBOSTON.COM