PowerPoint Presentation

DAY 1: REMARKABLE LEADERSHIP AT IMC

GEORGIA MURCH

Insert Date

WHY ARE WE HERE? Give leaders the skills, tools and confidence to become remarkable leaders Understand how to give and receive great feedback that improves performance and relationships Become more aware of our style, the impact it has and develop tools to self manage

ACTIVITY TIME

Let’s play

REMARKABLE LEADERSHIP Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others.

As we look ahead into the next century, leaders will be those who empower others.

Jack Welch Bill Gates

Technology is just a tool. In terms of getting the kids working together and motivating them, the teacher is the most important.

Bill Gates

I suppose leadership at one time meant muscles; but today it means getting along with people.

Mahatma Gandhi

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.

John Quincy Adams

REMARKABLE LEADERSHIP What does remarkable leadership look like for you?

Break into 2 groups

Leaders What should we be doing more of?

What should we be doing less of?

Team members What would we like to see more of from our leader?

What would we like to see less of

LEADERS ISSUES DUMP

What issues or situations with your team do you tend to avoid or find difficult?

What issues or situations are you unclear about managing or talking into?

WHAT SHOULD MANAGERS MANAGE? Performance

2

This is about skills in the job. Their capability or their commitment.

Eg. Coding incorrectly Not keeping customers up to date Slow turnover of work Poor delivery Improving on technical skills

1

Behaviours

Relates to what people say and/or do that Eg. Gossip/spreading rumours unauthorised time off making offensive comments on social media being rude to colleagues

3

Unacceptable conduct The situation is so bad it warrants immediate dismissal Eg. Stealing Falsifying medical certificates Sabotaging client relationships

THE POWER OF COACHING Coaching allows your people to reach their fullest potential + Leading them become effortless POINTERS

Ask don’t tell

Coaching gives you time

Give up your strong relationship to control

Allow your ego to move to the side

WHEN TO COACH The Skill/Will Matrix

HOW TO COACH – THE GROW MODEL

Goal

Options

Way forward

Reality

LET’S DO IT! In pairs

Lead – Decide on the questions you will use

Participant – Decide on a problem/situation you would like to work through

15 mins in total

Then a group debrief - DON’T START THE NEXT ONE!

DON’T BELIEVE EVERYTHING YOU THINK How we perceive information, situations, people will have a profound impact on your relationships and your conversations.

“

We do not see things as they are. We see them as we are.

Anais Nin

BOARD OF DIRECTORS IN OUR HEAD 01

Blamer

06

Always right

02

All about Me’er

07

Powerless

03

B&W Thinker

08

Perfectionist

04

Negative Thinker

09

Labeller

05

Catastrophiser/Minimiser

10

Entitler

WHAT’S YOUR START, STOP AND CONTINUE?

STOP

CONTINUE

Workbook

START

REMARKABLE LEADERS EXCEL IN COMMUNICATION

Own your stuff

Deliberate Practice

Know the tools

REMARKABLE LEADERS EXCEL IN COMMUNICATION

Remarkable Leadership

“

The key to real change is not just to build a great process – it’s for people to hold each other accountable to use the process and that requires crucial conversations”

Ron McMillan

WHAT IS REMARKABLE FEEDBACK? In the moment….or close to

Fact based

Candid yet kind

Helpful

Performance enhancing

Respectful

Unbias

Not personal

Open to their side

TYPES OF FEEDBACK Constructive feedback – positive

Constructive feedback - negative

•

Information specific, issue focused, and based on observation

•

Information specific, issue focused, and based on observation

•

About an effort well done

•

•

Objective, specific and non-judgmental

News about an effort that needs improvement

•

It is not ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ so it encourages discussion.

•

Not accusing – focused on outcomes

•

Objective, specific and non-judgmental

Praise

Criticism

•

This is a personal judgment, a favourable judgment

•

This is a personal judgment, an unfavourable judgment

•

General and vague

•

General and vague

•

Doesn’t encourage discussion so it can come across as hollow, insincere or lacking in substance

•

Without specifics it can lead to a battle over whose perception is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’

•

Focused on the person

•

Focused on the person

•

Based on opinions and feelings

•

Based on opinions and feelings

WHY DO WE AVOID/HAVE THEM POORLY?

Might ruin the relationship It’s not my

Lack of

job/team

confidence

member

Too

Unsure of

confrontational

the facts

No point …

Don’t have

nothing

time

will change Not sure how to approach

GREAT LEADERS ‘NIP THEM IN THE BUD’

Incidents

Cost to the Business

BushFire

SpotFire Time

If you do nothing…

It is likely the behaviour or

Only remarkable

nothing will change

action will repeat or accelerate

conversations will influence

THE BOTTOM LINE IS….

Joseph Grenny

CONFLICT IS GOOD

Thomas-Kilman conflict model

COMMUNICATION IS EVERYTHING

“

In any relationship, it’s important to be a good listener as well as a good communicator. Open, honest communication is the best foundation for any relationship, but remember it’s not what you say or what you do but how you make people feel that matters most. As the company grows, communication becomes more and more important..

Communication is one of the weakest spots in any organisation, no matter how good the communication is.

Tony Hsieh CEO Zappos

POOR COMMUNICATION COSTS ENGAGEMENT

RESULT

PROFIT

Devoted

Effortless

+100

Dedicated

Discretionary

+50

Committed

Compliance

+10

Tolerant

Non-committal

-10

Withdrawn

Pollution

-50

Disregard

Sabotage

-100

Ignoring the real cost of ineffective

Communication is like

communication is corporate suicide.

money…. You can never

But you don’t know it until it’s too late.

have enough!

WHAT ARE THE FACTS?

Luke is a Developer and has been on

Luke does not appear to be taking the

your team for just over a year. He is

feedback on board and you have been

based in NZ and you are in Melbourne.

having the same conversation for over 6

As the Team Leader you regularly catch

months now (your notes are on the

up with Luke to check on how things

database). This is becoming quite

are going and what he may need help

frustrating. The team in NZ have made

with. His skills when he joined were not

comments that the quality of work is not

as strong as others on the team,

great and are frustrated working with him.

however with training and coaching

They are not prepared to pass on this

along the way you felt confident he

feedback to him and have asked you as

would get there as he is a smart guy.

his manager to do something about it quickly. You need to have the conversation with Luke.

SPECULATION KILLED THE CAT Thoughts Beliefs

Facts

Speculate

Story

Conversation

Opinions Values

When we speculate on the facts and then

“Our personal earthquake of

present our story, not the facts, the outcome

assumptions become our own natural

is damaging – for us and for them.

disaster that shape our relationships”

THE ICEBERG SYNDROME

“

Never judge a man’s actions until you know his motives”.

Words and Behaviours

Thoughts and Feelings Values and Beliefs Driving needs

SEPARATE YOUR STORY FROM THE FACTS

Step

Step

Step

01

02

03

Reflect on your future conversation

Separate the facts from the story

In groups of 3 discuss, what story have you been telling yourself? Were you leading with facts or opinion?

DISCOVER THE REAL TRUTH Do you have

Conversations

or Yoursations?

You Conversation

Them

A good conversation is like a tennis rally – back and forth, back and forth.

PREPARATION PRESERVES RELATIONSHIP 1.

State the issue (the purpose)

2.

Provide some examples (high level only)

3.

Share you opinion/feelings about this

4.

Clarify what is at stake

5.

Identify your contribution to the problem

6.

Indicate your intent to resolve (do not problem solve)

7.

Ask them for their thoughts/perspective

LET’S GIVE IT A GO In pairs  Prepare for the future conversation (separate the story)  Lead – Practice your 1-2 minute start  Participant – Give feedback  10 mins in total  Then a group debrief - DON’T START THE NEXT ONE!

CREATE A SAFE ZONE Maintaining safety in a conversation is the difference between an outcome and an outbreak.

Mutual purpose Mutual respect

GOTTA AGREE ON THE PURPOSE

Your topic

My topic

Mutual Purpose

Not agreeing on the purpose of the conversation is like playing darts with a blindfold on. It’s pointless and often dangerous.

RESPECT OR BUST

0 -50

Much work to do before you ask for anything

100 Ask for anything

Respect is like air. You don’t notice it day to day but as soon as it’s gone it’s all you can think about.

RESPECT OR BUST

“

If you want to be a great leader, remember to treat all people with respect at all times. For one, because you never know you’ll need their help. And two, because it’s a sign you respect people, which all great leaders do.

Simon Sinek Author of ‘Leadership Expert’

LEARN TO LOOK FIGHT

Mutual Purpose and Mutual Trust

FLIGHT

LEARN TO LOOK

YOUR BRAIN BECOMES HYJACKED

Range

“

When we don’t Anger

feel safe we have a natural stress response, we

Visual Cortex

Auditory Cortex Basolateral amygdala Central amygdala Pons Spinal Cord

Medulla

Irritation

can’t fight it but we can tame it”.

Calm

FIGHTERS

Fighters tend to

Controlling Labelling Attacking Intimidating

FLIGHTERS

Flighters tend to avoid

Withdrawing

Issues

Avoiding

Content

Masking

People

LEARN TO LOOK

Your Self Analysis

LEARN TO LOOK

“

George

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.

Bernard Shaw

WHEN DON’T OTHERS FEEL SAFE?  Little eye contact

 Focusing on your faults/mistakes

 Limited contribution to the

 Raised voice/aggressive tone

conversation  Short responses  Interrupting  Not answering question  Talking non stop  Eye rolling

 Sarcasm

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN IT IS SAFE?

 Body language is positive  Good eye contact  Honesty is prevalent  Apologies may exist  Conversation flows  Options are discussed

TECHNIQUES TO RESTORE SAFETY 01

Apologise, when appropriate

02

Use do/don’t statements

03

Agree on a mutual purpose

04

Ask what is going on

05

Paraphrase to acknowledge their story

06

Make silence your friend

07

Validate their feelings

APOLOGIES MATTER

Apology

TRUST

Other Person

An apology is the super glue of conversations.

It can repair just about anything.

LET’S GIVE IT A GO In the same pair  Use the conversations you prepared earlier  Lead – prepare and practice the techniques to restore safety  Participant – decide on fight or flight mode and do it  10 mins in total  Then a group debrief - DON’T START THE NEXT ONE!

THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK What stops us from receiving feedback graciously Truth triggers Relationship triggers Identify triggers Delivery trigger

What we can do in the moment

Find the ‘gold’

Be the example

Beware of your iceberg

BUT HOW DO I SELF MANAGE? Positive self talk (good wolf, bad wolf)

Breathe

Go back to your notes

Listen… really.

Avoid interrupting

The only person you can control is a conversation…. is YOU!

Own your stuff/reacti ons

Ignore the story/speculation

Look for the gold

Be aware of your triggers

THE RIGHT PLACE, AT THE RIGHT TIME

Timing

Method

Location

METHOD

OUTCOME

Face to face

Ideal outcome

Face to face (tech)

Near 100%

Phone

Highly likely

Email

Highly unlikely

Text/message

Dangerous

Snapchat/ FB

Epic Fail

Ideal outcome

WHAT DO GREAT 1 ON 1’S LOOK LIKE In groups of 3:

Discuss what awesome 1 on 1’s look like?

 Fact based

 Address issues as they arise

What do we need to do to make them effective?

 Assess and manage to skills or will

 Conversations not Yoursations

LEADERS ISSUES RESOLUTION

What issues or situations with your team do you tend to avoid or find difficult?

What issues or situations are you unclear about managing or talking into?

WHERE HAVE WE BEEN? Why we avoid or manage poorly?

Separate facts from story

FIGHT Controlling Attacking Labeling Intimidating

Beware of the Iceberg

Preparation preserves relationships

The ‘real’ truth

Recognise the BOD’s Masking Avoiding Withdrawing

Climb out

FLIGHT

thinking trap

Right place at the right time

KEY TAKEAWAYS Learn to Look and STOP the

Shut the hell up!

discussion until safety is restored

The ‘real truth’ is your facts…

Don’t believe everything you think

AND theirs

– the BOD’s might be in control

‘Nipping it in the bud’ maintains

Beware of the Iceberg syndrome

relationships and productivity

and that you don’t apply it

Be conscious of Conversations

If you don’t practice then

not Yoursations. Telling does

NOTHING will change

not improve performance.

Present facts first always, don’t lead with opinion

When all else fails…. Breathe!

WHAT’S YOUR START, STOP AND CONTINUE?

STOP

CONTINUE

Workbook

START

GET OUT THERE AND BECOME REMARKABLE! Talk to Georgia Murch

0402 252 791 georgia@canwetalk.net.au www.canwetalk.net