YEARS OF EVERLASTING SISTERHOOD

by: pamela pedersen, university of north carolina at charlotte

To celebrate the 25th anniversary of Delta Phi Lambda, we wanted to explore the Everlasting Sisterhood® experience of our organization through the scope of 5 Sisters from 5 different generations and 5 different chapters. We wanted to get a sense of what Everlasting Sisterhood experience meant to sisters across multiple generations and chapters and were surprised to find so many similarities among the different members.

Joining a Sorority is an exciting opportunity for any college student looking for relationships built on trust, respect, and mutual support. Sisterhood is more than just a term or a concept; it is a way of life that encompasses a shared set of values and experiences. Sorority Sisters are there for each other through thick and thin, offering encouragement, guidance, and a shoulder to lean on. Sisterhood also involves a sense of accountability, where members hold each other responsible for upholding the principal values and standards of the Sorority.

“Everlasting Sisterhood” refers to the lifelong connections formed through the shared experiences, values, and traditions of the Sorority. The term “everlasting” suggests that this bond is not just a temporary or fleeting one, but rather something that lasts beyond graduation and into adulthood. Having 2,500+ Sisters initiated in our Sorority across 25 Chapters, over 25 years, means that Delta Phi Lambda has a plethora of members from different walks of life who Sisters can connect and grow a bond with.

While there are plenty of Sororities to join, we are always plagued with the question of how a Sorority differs from another. While each Greek organization has different philanthropies and perhaps different values that they stand for, what really makes a Sorority unique and different from another are its members. There is no Sorority like Delta Phi Lambda, because no other Sorority has the same members we have.

what does everlasting sisterhood mean to you?

Everlasting sisterhood means a lifelong commitment to my Sorors. Every major milestone in my life has included my sisters. They were a part of my wedding party, served as god mothers to my children, and helped me when I needed them the most. For example, my line sister helped me with my uncle’s funeral even though we had not been in touch for 15 plus years. — Anh Ngoc Nguyen (Founder, UGA, 1998)

Everlasting sisterhood is love within boundaries. When you fully understand why a Sister ticks the way she does, you come to respect her boundaries and lift her in times of struggle and celebrate her in times of success. Cindy Lee (Charter, GVSU, 2009)

Each sisterhood connection is unique, and it is up to each individual to define and shape their own understanding of the experience. — Tracy Wang (Charter, UAlbany, 2012)

Everlasting Sisterhood to me means an open door. No matter where you are in your life, Sisters will be there to support you. Sisters can always take a step back in involvement and come back when they feel ready! — Kaitlyn McCarthy (Charter, UConn, 2016)

Everlasting sisterhood to me is a community, a long lasting group of friends, and a family. Joining this sisterhood has helped me understand myself more as a person and understand myself more as someone’s friend and sister. Not only can I call this sisterhood a group of close friends, but I can also call them my rock when I’m at a low point in life. — Ada Eng (Active, OSU, 2021)

what are great ways to keep sisterhood alive?

AN: My tips for keeping the sisterhood alive is to be accessible. Often, sisters will contact me for various reasons. I usually say yes when there is an ask 95% of the time. Also, I try to attend events periodically. This gives all of us an opportunity to catch up and remain relevant in each other’s lives.

CL: Keeping a sisterhood alive starts with ourselves. Sometimes all it takes is a leap of faith to share a story of vulnerability to let someone into our lives in a meaningful way. If we can’t show our true selves… then we can’t expect others to do the same.

TW: Always remember why you joined this sorority in the first place. Having a sense of belonging is important, and so is the approval and acceptance to a group; however, always remember to love yourself and be true to yourself. Learn and grow from your time as an undergraduate Sister. Know that everyone is going to make mistakes, and it is all about learning from them and knowing how to apply them to your personal growth as a sister and as a person. No matter how disengaged you feel from the sorority, understand that you always have a support system to go to for advice or just to vent.

KM: I think there’s so many ways to keep Sisterhood thriving. From simple hangouts and get togethers to volunteering with the Sorority, to giving back to your chapter or Sorority as a whole, Sisterhood is the backbone of what is shared.

AE: Never stop bettering your relationships between the sisters and the chapter. It’s important to continuously work towards creating a safe space and community for each other. We’re all here for the same reasons and for the same goals, so keeping that sisterhood alive creates bonds that not only improve/help you, but also can help the sisters and sorority.

what are the benefits of joining an everlasting sisterhood?

AN: The benefits of joining an everlasting sisterhood is knowing you are never truly alone. We have such strong leaders that we can lean on for help and support when it comes to career or personal growth. We also have empathetic and giving sisters that provides us a shoulder to cry on or give constructive advice if needed.

CL: You watch crows feet grow on the corners of their beautiful eyes and see laugh lines you know you were part of. Growing older together is such a wonderful feeling even if it’s just seeing each other once a month at best.

TW: You will have access to a network of women that you will find and form lifetimes of new friendships and opportunities; personally, and professionally.

KM: Joining an Everlasting Sisterhood gives the person access to a network of Sisters with diverse experiences. It is not only beneficial for social interaction but also professional.

AE: You get lifelong friends! I transferred my junior year and crossed my junior year so my first group of friends at my school was the sorority and it has definitely made me become a better person and made me become more confident in myself. This sisterhood doesn’t only help you socially or mentally, it can also help you academically. This sisterhood definitely made me more focused and more goal-oriented in life.

what are your personal examples of everlasting sisterhood?

AN: My personal examples of sisterhood is taking a call or meeting with a sister I’ve never met before because they asked me too. I want to be helpful and provide assistance or advice when I can. I hope my actions validate that our sisterhood is truly special and will inspire others to pay it forward to another Sister.

CL: Personal examples of sisterhood: Officiating my Sorority Sisters/roommates wedding, that was such an honor. Standing up for my line sisters wedding. Having sisters come over to help watch my newborn and help me recover from a c section by allowing me to rest and feeding me sushi when my family wasn’t present.

TW: Creating a unique bond with my 8 line sisters during our chartering days. We just recently celebrated our 11 years of charterversary on March 31. It was at that moment, I didn’t even realize that more than a decade has gone by, and each of us are in our own stage of life, and yet we never stopped trying to put in the effort to stay connected (wishing each other Happy Birthday, attending each other’s wedding, congratulating on transitioning into motherhood).

I volunteered to be on staff position and later joined the National Board and worked alongside many strong, professional, and talented female leaders. I felt honored that I had the opportunities to work with them and learn from them. I am who I am today in my professional career because of what I have learned during this unique experience.

Meeting different sisters from different chapters and building everlasting friendship with them. Thanks to DPhiL, some of these sisters are my closest friends today, where I can go to them about anything. This is what I called Unconditional Love, and where we accept each other’s flaws and always encourage and uplift each other.

KM: To this day I am close with many Sisters since I have crossed in Spring 2016. My line sisters and family tree still are in touch and hang out. I’m also still here to help other sisters and love to give back to the Sorority through volunteering.

AE: Some personal examples of everlasting sisterhood are creating bonds and memories that I can relate with my actual sister, who is a charter at my school. I’ve always heard stories of her and her experiences with the sorority but now that I’m a sister at our chapter, it’s refreshing to understand what she meant about finding the right crowd and community. Being with those who understand you and being with those who become your best friends.