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Y 1946 THE WAR WAS OVER, LEAVING LARGE SWATHES B OF LONDON’S EAST END VIRTUALLY FLATTENED BY THE BLITZ, INCLUDING THE WHITECHAPEL HEADQUARTERS OF THE EAST LONDON LIGHT INFANTRY. MUCH-DECORATED WAR VETERAN C.S.M. RONNIE HICKS WAS GIVING A GROUP OF NEW RECRUITS A TOUR OF WHAT REMAINED, INCLUDING THE TEMPORARY REGIMENTAL MUSEUM. IT’LL BE A FEW YEARS YET BEFORE WE CAN HOUSE THE MUSEUM PROPERLY, BUT IT’S WHAT’S ON SHOW THAT MATTERS MORE THAN THE BUILDING IT’S IN. THIS IS YOUR REGIMENT’S HISTORY, AND IT’S SOMETHING YOU SHOULD TAKE PRIDE IN.

STORY ALAN HEBDEN ART BENET COVER BENET

4

BY BRITISH ARMY STANDARDS THE EAST LONDON LIGHT INFANTRY, OR E.L.L.I., WAS A YOUNG REGIMENT, FIRST RAISED DURING THE BOER WAR LESS THAN FIFTY YEARS EARLIER. BUT WITH TWO WORLD WARS HAVING BEEN FOUGHT SINCE THERE WAS NO SHORTAGE OF BATTLE HONOURS AND EXHIBITS TO PUT ON DISPLAY.

...AND OVER HERE IS THE REGIMENTAL SILVER.

FOR THE MOST PART THE REGIMENTAL SILVER WAS MUCH THE SAME AS A SCORE OF OTHER REGIMENTAL COLLECTIONS ACROSS THE COUNTRY, EXCEPT THAT PRIDE OF PLACE WAS GIVEN TO A MODEL OF A BATTEREDLOOKING BEDFORD Q.L. LORRY WITH ITS DRIVER STANDING NEXT TO IT.

WHAT’S SO SPECIAL ABOUT AN OLD ARMY LORRY? HANG ON, THE MODEL OF THE DRIVER . . .

5 THE SHARP-EYED RECRUIT HAD SPOTTED SOMETHING EXTRAORDINARY. IT’S YOU, SARN’T-MAJOR!

I SUPPOSE IT IS.

THE RECRUITS GATHERED ROUND RONNIE, EAGER TO HEAR THE STORY BEHIND THE MODEL. THE MODEL’S IN DESERT KIT. WAS IT SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED IN NORTH AFRICA?

COME ON, SARN’T-MAJOR. TELL US.

YES, NORTH AFRICA, FIVE YEARS AGO NOW. PIN BACK YOUR EARS, LADS. PREPARE FOR THE INCREDIBLE TALE OF QUEENIE, PRIDE OF THE DESERT!

THERE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN REGIMENTS OF THE BRITISH ARMY WHICH HAVE ATTRACTED MORE THAN THEIR FAIR SHARE OF THE ARISTOCRACY, NONE MORE SO THAN THE ROYAL FITZROVIAN REGIMENT. IN NORTH AFRICA IN 1941 A FIGHTING PATROL OF THE REGIMENT LED BY MAJOR THE EARL ROYSTON SCENTED BLOOD. AN EYETIE SUPPLY COLUMN. BETTER GET SPLODGE’S WHEELS OUT, BEEFY.

RIGHT-HO, ROLLO!

6 CAPTAIN THE VISCOUNT BOUFLEUR, BETTER KNOWN AS BEEFY, AND LIEUTENANT THE VISCOUNT WATERBURY, BETTER KNOWN AS SPLODGE, HURRIED ROUND TO THE BACK OF THE HALF-TON DODGE WHERE SPLODGE’S SOUPED-UP TRIUMPH TIGER MOTORCYCLE WAS BEING CARRIED. MOMENTS LATER IT ROARED INTO THROATY LIFE. CHOCKS AWAY, BEEFY.

YOUR WISH IS MY COMMAND, OLD BEAN!

THE MOMENT THE RAMP WAS IN PLACE SPLODGE OPENED THE THROTTLE AND THUNDERED DOWN IT. A-HUNTIN’ WE WILL GO . . .

A-HUNTIN’ WE WILL GO . . .

HEIGH-HO THE DAIRY-O, A HUNTIN’ WE WILL GO!

7 MOMENTS LATER THE EARL ROYSTON, BETTER KNOWN AS ROLLO, GAVE THE REGIMENT’S TRADITIONAL BATTLE CRY AND THE HUNT WAS ON.

TALLY HO...THE FITZROYS!

MIO DIO...

INGLESE!

THE LUMBERING ITALIAN LORRIES STOOD LITTLE CHANCE AGAINST THE FAST-MOVING ATTACKERS. ONLY THE FIAT HAD THE SPEED TO OUTRUN THEM. SAPRISTI...

AAARGH!

GET US OUT OF HERE, DRIVER...PRONTO, PRONTO!

HULLO, THE FIAT’S MAKING A BREAK FOR IT. CAN’T LET THAT HAPPEN.

8 SPLODGE’S TRIUMPH WAS ONE OF THE FASTEST IN THE WORLD FOR ITS TIME AND IT QUICKLY STARTED TO CATCH THE SPEEDING FIAT.

SIGNOR MAJOR, A MOTORCYCLE IS COMING UP BEHIND US!

KEEP GOING. I SHALL DEAL WITH IT!

AS THE BIKE DREW LEVEL THE MAJOR FIRED A PISTOL WILDLY OUT OF HIS WINDOW BUT SPLODGE WASN’T TOO CONCERNED.

DIE, INGLESE!

THE WAY THE CAR’S BOUNCING AROUND HE COULDN’T HIT A BARN DOOR AT TWO FEET.

9 SPLODGE GUNNED THE BIKE FORWARD AND CALMLY DROPPED A PRIMED GRENADE DIRECTLY IN THE CAR’S PATH. HAVE A PINEAPPLE, CHAPS!

MIO DIO!

IT WAS MUCH TOO LATE FOR THE DRIVER TO SWERVE ASIDE AND THE RESULTING EXPLOSION BLEW OFF ONE OF THE FIAT’S FRONT WHEELS. ARRRGH!

10 THE MAJOR AND HIS DRIVER STAGGERED OUT OF THE WRECKED CAR TO FIND SPLODGE’S STEN GUN AIMED DIRECTLY AT THEM ALONG WITH A STERN WORD OF ADVICE.

BEST THROW IN THE TOWEL, MAJOR. UNLIKE YOU, I SHAN’T MISS! THROW IN THE TOWEL? AH, SI...WE SURRENDER!

ONE OF THE REASONS FOR THE MAJOR’S ATTEMPTED FLIGHT MAY HAVE BEEN TO TRY AND SAVE THE FINE FOOD AND WINE PACKED IN THE BACK OF THE CAR. IT HAD BEEN DESTINED FOR HIS OFFICERS’ MESS, BUT WOULD NOW FIND ITS WAY TO ANOTHER ONE INSTEAD.

I SAY, ROLLO, LOOK AT THIS LOT. NOTHING BUT THE BEST, EH? BRING IT BACK TO OUR MESS TENT. JEABES WILL MAKE A FINE FEAST WITH THIS HAUL!