DBQ EVERYWHERE ABOVE THE RAINBOW
Special Edition Gay Is A Gift From God
Conversations With A Professional Bottom What If It Feels Good? A Review Of D. J. McLaurin's New Novel
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Volume 1 Issue 3 @DBQMAG DBQMAG.COM
amily
Aair
My Gallant Gay Fathers
DBQ Winter
2011
David Bridgeforth Quarterly
p.
Gay Is A Gift From God p.13
Here We GO! 3. A Family Affair My Gallant Gay Fathers
5.Doctor To The Gays
8. DBQ Fashion
10. Remy Mars Conversations with a Professional Bottom
13. Gay Is A 7. What If It Feels Good? Gift From Reviewed God by Stanley Bennett Clay
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What I've Come To Know
The Cover David Bridgeforth, Stanley Bennett Clay, and Reggie Wells in Indianapolis, Indiana. In the home of Derrick Adkisson and Lincoln Weir. Hair by Parris Wagner, makeup by Justin Pate and Reggie Wells , Cover styled by Reggie Wells and Derrick Adkisson. Photography by Torrie Hudson
DBQ Magazine is a nationally distributed quarterly lifestyle publication. Published and printed in Indianapolis, Indiana. For more information on advertisement, circulation, or articles please visit us at www.DBQMAG.com Or call 317.500.4327 or 908.656.6218.
DBQ Magazine
Winter 2011
Editor-In-Chief /
Dashawn Usher
Publisher
Copy Editor
David A.
Justyn Pate
Bridgeforth Jr.
Cover Editor
Senior Editor/
Reggie Wells
Executive
Art Director
Assistant
David A.
Jacqui Tanner
Bridgeforth Sr.
Contributing
Makeup
Editor
Reggie Wells
Stanley Bennett
Justin Pate
Clay
Hair
Fashion Editor
Parris Wagner
Shamara Lee
Photography
Editor at large
Torrie Hudson
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AA amily amilyAffair Affair
My My Gallant GallantGay GayFathers Fathers Stanley Bennett Clay and Reggie Wellsmake makeme meproud proudto tobe be aa Stanley Bennett Clay and Reggie Wells black gay man and their black gay son. They are my chosen fathers. black gay man and their black gay son. They are my chosen fathers. II chosen son. I was given beautifullybrilliant brilliantheterosexual heterosexual am am theirtheir chosen son. I was given beautifully parents and grandparents who loved and raised me well, but all that I parents and grandparents who loved and raised me well, but all that I am and all that I ever hope to be, as a gay man, I owe to these two am and all that I ever hope to be, as a gay man, I owe to these two men. And so the celebration of family is more than holiday food and men. And so the celebration of family is more than holiday food and fellowship, it is a celebration of who we are, and where we've come fellowship, it is a celebration of who and where we've come from. It is knowing the journeys of we the are, gay icons on whose shoulders from. It is knowing the journeys of the gay icons on whose shoulders we stand. we stand. Stanley Bennett Clay, one of the most legendary black openly gay Stanley Bennett one winning of the most legendary black openly gay artists alive is Clay, an award actor, playwright, novelist, journalists artists is an award playwright, journalists andalive film director. He iswinning the onlyactor, person in history, novelist, other than Quincy andJones, film director. He iscollaborate the only person in history, than He Quincy to musically with Ashford andother Simpson. was Jones, to musically collaborate withofAshford and Simpson. Hebeen was the the driving force behind the start this magazine, he having and publisher of of SBC thehemost widely the editor-in-chief driving force behind the start thisMagazine, magazine, having been the distributed, and and publisher most popular magazine in the the country LGBT editor-in-chief of SBC Magazine, mostfor widely people ofand color in the 90s. magazine in the country for LGBT distributed, most popular people of color in the 90s. Reggie Wells is arguably the greatest gay makeup artist alive. With overWells 400 celebrity clients Beyonce Janetartist Jackson to With Aretha Reggie is arguably thefrom greatest gayand makeup alive. and theclients late Michael Jackson,and I amJanet sure ifJackson you name a overFranklin 400 celebrity from Beyonce to Aretha celebrity touched their face first. Being Award Franklin andhe thehas late Michael Jackson, I am sureanif Emmy you name a winning makeup artist, he has been Oprah Winfrey's personal celebrity he has touched their face first. Being an Emmy Award makeup artist for over 22 years. He was the creative director for over winning makeup artist, he has been Oprah Winfrey's personal 120 Essence Magazine covers, as well as,every O Magazine cover makeup artist for over 22 years. He was the creative director for over for the past 10 years. 120 Essence Magazine covers, as well as,every O Magazine cover for the past 10 years. I remember Dr. Maya Angelou telling me that the reason Dr. Martin
Luther King Jr. was so great was he knew who came before him,. He I remember Dr. Maya Angelou me that the reason Dr.SoMartin carried every 'Fathering' andtelling 'Mothering' mentor with him. when he Luther Jr. was so great washe hewasn't knew alone. who came before him,. He got King on stage to give a speech He had Howard carried every Gandhi 'Fathering' 'Mothering' mentor with him. Thurman, and and Benjamin Mays along with him. So when he got on stage to give a speech he wasn't alone. He had Howard Thurman, Gandhi Page 3 and Benjamin Mays along with him. DBQ Magazine
Our of of who wewe are.are. It isItthe Our lives livesare areaafamily familyaffair; affair;the theinception inception who is the family thethe trajectory of who we we are.are. family unit unitthat thatmany manytimes timeschanges changes trajectory of who What most people don’t understand is that in spite of the fact that we What most people don’t understand is that in spite of the fact that we cannot control the families we are born into, we do possess the power cannot control the families we are born into, we do possess the power to create our own families. So imagine the horror I experienced when to create our own families. So imagine the horror I experienced when told stories about the fallen state and standard of gay houses and told stories about the fallen state andcommunity. standard of gay houses and families, specifically in the black LGBT
families, specifically in the black LGBT community.
Now for those who aren't familiar with 'gay houses or families', a Now fordominant those who aren't familiar with 'gay houses or families', culture in the black gay experience, let me explain. Whena a culturegay dominant in the blackout' gay experience, let me explain. young boy or girl 'comes they usually arrive under the When a young gay boy or girlolder 'comes usually arrive thethem tutelage of someone and out' wiserthey in the gay life who under teaches tutelage of someone older and wiser in the gay friendly life whoor teaches them all the things their biological parenst; whether not, can't all thethem. thingsBut their parenst; whether are gayso friendly or not, can't teach thebiological current state and standards frightening, young peopleBut arethe coming out state and they having their friends, who teach them. current andare standards are so frightening, are children themselves, becoming or 'mothers'. young people are coming out and their theygay are 'fathers' having their friends,Iwho am time I hear a 19 year oldgay calling a 20 or year old his I are mortified children every themselves, becoming their 'fathers' 'mothers'. gay grandmother. It is theIblind leading theablind and old his am mortified every time hearand a 19simple year old calling 20 year simple to the country of the no return. Nowsimple we have gay 'families' of gay grandmother. It is blind and leading the blindfull and children, some dropping out of school, and others losing themselves simple to the country of no return. Now we have gay 'families' full of to temptations don't serve their highest interest. many times children, somethat dropping out of school, and others And losing themselves ittoistemptations even worse that thandon't that. serve There their are gays who have been 'out' for highest interest. And many times some time pursuing these newly gay faces with false intentions, often it is even worse than that. There are gays who have been 'out' for really only interested in sexual exploitation. some time pursuing these newly gay faces with false intentions, often In this holiday season, in this cold winter air, we need gay fathers and really only interested in sexual exploitation. mothers that can warm our hearts spritually and lead us to higher In this holiday season, in this cold winter air, we need gay fathers and ground. We need to surround ourselves with the kind of family that mothersus that can hearts for spritually and higher teaches how to warm reach our our hands the stars, thelead kindus ofto family ground. We need to surround ourselves with the kind of family that that guides us to truth. For example, one night in LA, while we were teaches us how to reach our hands stars, kind ofand family having wine, Stanley explained to me for thatthe every timethe I attend that guides us tothat truth. For example, one in LA, while we me were tithe at a church doesn't believe gay is anight gift from God, is like having wine, explained to me that every time I attend and marching with Stanley the KKK.
tithe at a church that doesn't believe gay is a gift from God, is like me marching with the KKK. Winter 2011
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He taught me that night to stay no place that doesn't celebrate who I really am. We also need more gay fathers like Reggie. Once I was sad over a boy I was dating who was a jerk, Reggie told me the same thing he told Beyonce when she was 16: “Be careful who you let in your life because whatever he is, that is just who he is." I learned that I can't change someone once they are in my life because they will be exactly who they are and that is just what it is. These lessons changed my life. Every moment of my life I take my family with me. From my Grandmother 'Nano' to Maya Angelou, my dad David Sr., Les Brown, and my gay fathers, I hear their voices and study their truths. I can be and be better in this winter wonderland because my life is a family affair.
Behind the Cover 1.
Reggie Wells with Aretha Franklin, Reggie with Oprah Winfrey, Reggie in front of a wall of every O Magazine cover he did. Stanley Bennett Clay's award winning play "Ritual" that was turned into a feature ďŹ lm he directed in 1989.
2. 3.
4.
5. 1. Reggie Wells, David Bridgeforth and his father David Bridgeforth Sr. 2. Justin Pate (David's personal makeup artist doing Reggie Wells' makeup. 3. Photographer Torrie Hudson with iPad, Derrick Adkisson (owner of the home and close family friend), David Bridgeforth, and Reggie Wells. 4. David Bridgeforth and Parris Wagner (personal barber to Mr. Bridgeforth) 5. Reggie Wells, David Bridgeforth, and Stanley Bennett Clay.
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DBQ Magazine
Winter 2011
Page 4
Doctor to the GAYS Compilied by Dr. Janet Arno
It is only persistent HPV infections (the kinds that don’t go away for years) that put people at risk for cancer. The types of HPV that can cause cancer are not the same as the types that can cause genital warts.
1. What is HPV? Human Papillomavirus (HPV) is a virus that infects the cells of the skin in many parts of the body. There are more than 150 HPV types. Some of these cause common warts, which are transmitted via non-sexual contact. Others, such as the genital HPV, are transmitted via sexual contact. Of the 40 types of genital HPV that exist, some are low-risk, that is, they are unlikely to cause infections that develop into cancer and cause only genital warts or bumps with or without a stem-like attachment to the skin. Others are high-risk types, which are more likely to cause infections that could develop into cancer.
If you are a Woman
It’s important to know about the link between HPV and cervical cancer and about the steps you can take to prevent this disease. Getting three doses of an HPV vaccine and getting regular screenings can prevent cervical cancer. One HPV vaccine brand, Gardasil, can also prevent most genital warts.
If you are a Man It’s important to know that you can have genital HPV—and pass it to your partner—even if you have no symptoms. Some types of HPV can lead to cancer of the anus and penis, but these cancers are rare in men with healthy immune systems. If you have HIV infection too, both genital warts and anal cancer develop more frequently. A PAP smear can be done for men to help detect changes in the skin that might lead to cancer. Other more sensitive tests are in the process of being developed.
Genital HPV is considered to be the most common STD in the U.S. People who have had unprotected sex with more than two partners in their lifetime have probably been exposed to HPV. It's possible to have been exposed to the HPV months or years before warts appear or for symptoms never to appear at all after exposure. Once an individual is infected, genital HPV can be passed via skin-to-skin contact from one person to another during anal or vaginal sex. Most often it presents as wart-like bumps on the penis, in and around the vagina, on the cervix (opening to the uterus) and/or around the rectum and are usually caused by types 6 and 11. Types that most commonly are associated with cervical and anal cancers are types 16 and 18, but there are others as well.
There is one vaccine brand, Gardasil, to prevent the most common problem caused by HPV in men, genital warts. This vaccine is available for 9- to 26-year-old males.
3. What cautions and/or preventive measures should one take against HPV?
2. What is the effect of HPV on men and women?
The surest way to prevent HPV is not to have sex.
Genital HPV does not cause health problems for most people. Low-risk HPV infections can cause genital warts. The warts are usually painless and may be flat or raised, single or in groups and small or large. Without treatment, the warts may grow in size and number, or they may go away on their own. Women with HPV might have warts on the vagina, vulva or cervix. Men with HPV might have warts on the penis, scrotum, or groin. Both men and women can have genital warts on the anus or thigh.
If you decide to be sexually active, limit the number of partners you have. The fewer sex partners you have, the less likely you will be to get HPV.
High-risk HPV infections can sometimes develop into cancer of the cervix. These infections may also lead to other cancers, such as anal cancer. In some people, highrisk HPV infections can persist and cause cell changes. If these cell changes are not treated, they may lead to cancer over time.
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Condoms may lower chances of getting HPV, genital warts or cervical cancer if used the right way every time you have sex. However, HPV can infect areas that are not covered by a condom— so you should not expect condoms to fully protect against HPV. Washing the genitals, urinating or douching after sex will not prevent any sexually transmitted disease including HPV. Females and males can get vaccinated to protect against the types of HPV that most commonly cause health problems. These vaccines are given in three doses over six months. The vaccines are most effective when all doses are received before a person has sexual contact with his or her first partner.
Winter 2011
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4. Are there any health problems specific to lesbians? According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office of Women’s Health, research tells us that lesbian and bisexual women are at a higher risk for certain problems than other women. It is important for lesbian and bisexual women to talk to their doctors about their health concerns, which include:
Depression and anxiety. Many factors cause depression and anxiety among all women. However, lesbian and bisexual women report higher rates of depression and anxiety than other women do. Bisexual women are even more likely than lesbians to have had a mood or anxiety disorder. Depression and anxiety in lesbian and bisexual women may be due to:
Heart disease. Lesbians and bisexual women have a higher rate of obesity, smoking and stress. All of these are risk factors for heart disease. Lesbians and bisexual women should talk with their doctors about how to prevent heart disease. Cancer. Several factors put lesbian and bisexual women at higher risk for developing some cancers. Remember: •Lesbians are less likely than heterosexual women to have had a full-term pregnancy. Hormones released during pregnancy and breastfeeding are thought to protect women against breast, endometrial, and ovarian cancers. •Lesbians and bisexual women are less likely to get routine screenings, such as a PAP test, which can detect cervical cancer. The viruses that cause most cervical cancer can be sexually transmitted between women. •Lesbians and bisexual women are more likely to smoke than heterosexual. This increases the risk for lung cancer in all women who have sex with women.
• Social stigma • Rejection by family members • Abuse and violence • Unfair treatment in the legal system • Stress from hiding some or all parts of one's life • Lack of health insurance
Lesbians and bisexuals often feel they have to hide their sexual orientation from family, friends and employers. Bisexual women may feel even more alone because they don't feel included in either the heterosexual community or the gay and lesbian community. Lesbians and bisexuals can also be victims of hate crimes and violence. Discrimination against these groups does exist, which can lead to depression and anxiety. Women can reach out to their doctors, mental health professionals and area support groups for help dealing with depression or anxiety. These conditions are treatable, and with help, women can overcome them.
5. Is it true you can die from syphilis? If so, how?
Untreated syphilis can lead to organ damage, including brain damage, and in some cases death. In addition, syphilis infection makes HIV easier to catch or to give to sex partners. New data show that for people who have HIV, syphilis can dramatically increase their viral load and cause a drop in CD4 counts. This increase is resolved with syphilis treatment. About one-third of untreated people with syphilis experience serious damage to various organs and body systems. Tertiary syphilis can appear any time from a 1 to 50 years after becoming infected; most cases occur within 20 years. The brain, heart, liver, and bones are the most commonly involved organs. Tertiary syphilis can cause paralysis, mental problems, blindness, deafness, heart failure and death. Portions of this article were written by members of the San Francisco City Clinic and can be found on their website, created by ISIS, Inc. They have generously shared this information with us, and so it can be included on the Bell Flower Clinic website. In addition, information may be found on the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) website including information about a new vaccine recently approved to prevent HPV infection of men. Men who have sex with men are at particular risk for this infection, which may cause anal cancer, particularly if the individual is infected with HIV, the Human Immunodeficiency Virus.
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DBQ Magazine
Winter 2011
Page 6
DBQ
BOOKS
What If It Feels Good? Reviewed by Stanley Bennett Clay
D.J. McLaurin’s hardto-put-down, exceptionally wellwritten and phenomenally plotted “What If It Feels Good?” is pure old-school pop fiction with an edge. Harkening back to the better days of Danielle Steele, Sidney Sheldon, and Jeffrey Archer, and a terrific homage to Charles Dickens, Ms. McLaurin restores melodrama’s good name with a story as heart-wrenching as anything concocted by the Bronte sisters, while still maintaining a unique voice of her own with a contemporary and downright controversial slant few writers have been brave enough to traverse.
The story opens on the mean streets of Detroit. Michael Bagley is an almost too beautiful street urchin, a cross between the angelic Oliver Twist and the streetwise Artful Dodger, homeless, eating out of trashcans, surviving anyway he can. The novel opens with three telling sentences: “Men were attracted to him. At just fourteen, Michael could see it. Of course not every man was attracted to the youthful sweetness of the innocent, but there were enough of them to make a lucrative living.”
But there’s something special about Michael’s personality, as special as his unearthly beauty. Even as he half-heartedly hustles male tricks twice his age and older with mixed results, the kid’s got chutzpa and a lot of heart, with no desire to do anyone harm. He beds an older woman out of gratitude and genuine affection, his good heart earns him shared shelter under the highway with a
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DBQ Magazine
loving homeless couple, and even his single mother, a stripper and a loving (if irresponsible) parent beset by unfortunate circumstances, benefits from his unconditional love and devotion. Ironically it is because of his protection of her (whom, against her protest, he stays away from to give her space with an abusive pimp-type) that lands him in trouble, as a gun accidentally goes off injuring his mother’s nefarious paramour.
Swirls of activities ensue at a deliciously dizzying pace—court hearings, mysterious lawyers, the sudden appearance of an unknown father, the threat of incarcerations, and custody decisions. Suddenly the court gives Michael’s biological father, Joseph Simpson, a black billionaire entertainment and media mogul from New York, an ultimatum: either assume custody of his illegitimate son, or watch the boy be remanded to Michigan state custody.
Both mother and son are devastated by the results, as Michael is whisked off to a New York mansion by a father he doesn’t know and to a stepmother and half-siblings who are less than cordial.
Without resorting to simple black-and-white stereotypes, the author creates circumstances for Michael in his new setting so emotional that tears of sadness and tears of joy are guaranteed to fly, and after being roller-coastered through every emotion imaginable you’ll jump with the bitter sweet joy of parents at their only daughter’s wedding when Michael’s ultimate relationship with his father works itself out.
Over time a bond is created between Michael and the rest of his new family, only for the now 17-year-old to enter into a deeply moving love affair with his father’s best friend, a man twenty years his senior, creating another grand crisis in a story awash with crises.
Ms. McLaurin’s handling of the delicate issue of pedophilia is nothing short of miraculous; leaving readers with conflicting views and though-provoking questions that will spark discussion long after the final page is turned.
Books like these—impossibly beautiful people, rags to riches, what price celebrity, a media eating frenzy, tawdry sex, infidelity, deep family jealousy, dark family secrets, international jet-setting, deathbed confessions, and the kitchen sink—usually have very little on their minds and are so often mere titillating stories poorly articulated (How do you say Jackie Collins-Judith Krantz?), but in “What If It Feels Good?” D.J. McLaurin has cracked the secret recipe for writing an intelligent and literate potboiler.
It is almost a cliché’ to say that I didn’t want this book to end. Well it also happens to be a fact. What a hellifiliscious read. What a hellifiliscious writer. I wait anxiously for whatever she comes up with next.
WHAT IF IT FEELS GOOD?
A novel by D. J. McLaurin
[Taylor Nicole Publishing 404 pp. ISBN 9780909403804 website: www.djmclaurin.com]
Winter 2011
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As he approaches my seat nothing about him screams prince of urban porn, nor does he look like the smooth soft feminine bottom with the perfect 'cakes' in his videos. We are in Philly at the 30th street train station for the first time ever I got intimate with a porn star. Here is my raw conversation with a retiring professional bottom. David Bridgeforth, DBQ: Why porn? Remy Mars: I have always had a fascination with porn, even as a young kid I would study it. I mean every little boy goes into their dad's room and gets his stash of porn. DB: So you never had any judgment about the industry? RM: No. I mean I look at sex like an art. DB: What kind of childhood did you have? RM: I had a good childhood. I was born down south in Jackson, Mississippi. DB: I can tell. I hear the accent. RM: I'm trying to get rid of it but it comes back and forth. But my childhood was good. I have an older sister and two younger brothers. I’m the smart kid of the family, I guess. My brothers and I are close. Steven is the closest to me in my family to this day. My childhood was regular. I grew up around white people for the most part of my life. I didn't really get introduced to an urbanized setting until high school. DB: What did your parent do? RM: They’re regular blue-collar folk. They both are still together to this day and have been together for 28 years. I have great parents, even though they weren't the easiest parents. DB: When did you come out? How old we're you? RM: I was 18 going on 19. DB: And how old are you now, because I hear you keep changing your age?
Remy Conversations Professional Mars Bottom with a
with the industry. I had just graduated from high school and I was working two full time jobs while in college at Penn State. I withdrew from school and just started to work. When I saw it wasn't working for me I started to wonder what was next for me. I had gotten in some underground modeling in some local urban stores. Around the same time I had gotten an Adam 4 Adam account and one of the first adult entertainment companies in Philly hit me up on there and we exchanged some messages. About a month later I was on a set.
RM: No, I don’t keep changing my age. I just turned 24 last Friday. Let me show you my license so we can stop all these rumors.
DB: What was it like doing your first porn scene?
DB: Was your coming out hard for your family?
DB: Are you nervous before every scene?
RM: It was a secret to my family at first. I was out and doing porn for like 4 months before they found out. My closest brother called me and told me that someone sent my sister a video on MySpace—you know MySpace was hot at the time—and my sister ended up showing my parents. To this day I still don't know why she did that, but that’s how they found out. DB: What got you into porn? Was it the money? RM: I can't say it wasn't the money. I'll put it this way. It was the fascination I had
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RM: I was nervous as fuck.
RM: There's a little bit, even now, there is this belly feelin'...but once I get on set and in the room it goes away. DB: Especially once the chemistry is created? RM: Well, many times you can't even bank on that. I don't know what it is but something just clicks and I guess that’s when Remy Mars comes on, because in my regular life I'm reserved. I'm shy. I'm not very social, but when I get on a set and around that environment it's like I tap into this whole different character. Not too much different
DBQ Magazine
Winter 2011
from myself but the inhibitions melt away. It‘s kind of like the id and the ego. And plus the people there try to make it as comfortable as possible. I gotta tell you, after my first scene, I honestly couldn’t wait to do the next one. It was a thrill. DB: You know, in the black gay community porn stars are like movie stars, like rock stars. Do you feel like a rock star? RM: Yes! It gets crazy at times. I mean I live a fast life. I’m constantly on the move. Being a porn star isn't just that one day of going to the set and doing the do. After that, you have to promote the DVD, and you have to travel to different cities and different clubs. An average day can go from 6 a.m. to 6 a.m. the next day. They keep you busy, especially around the gay prides. DB: What kind of money does a porn star make? RM: Different rates. Really, it depends on your likeability and your popularity. Sometimes it depends on the company. But starting off its always crap. Starting off, I think i was paid $250.00 for a scene. Honestly, that isn't that bad... I know people are like $250 isn't anything, but you’re making that much and you’re probably shooting 3 times a day and maybe 4 times a week.
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DB: So $250 to have an orgasm, verses having one for free. RM: Yes, it gets a bill paid. DB: I'm sure you get a lot more than that now? RM: Yes... DB: So you’re a free agent, aren't you? Your not signed with any certain company? RM: Yes, I’m a free agent, not signed with anyone. You have more control that way. DB: You did a live scene with Tyson Sexford. How did that come about? RM: We both actually got that gig through Cuban Michaels. He is a close friend of the person who was hosting the event. When I got there I met Tyson. I heard of him before and we talked and he was as nervous as I was. Neither of us had done anything like this before. DB: Live. Both of you having sex live in front of a large audience. RM: Yes live. And it's not even like a naked audience with people masturbating. They’re just sitting there watching, like they’re at an opera.
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DB: Wow! So, you get naked and it's cold. What if you don't get turned on? What if you can't get it up? RM: I think it's more pressure on the 'top' performer, but Tyson got through it. I mean we were both nervous and we did a little warm up before in the back. DB: What's a warm up? RM: You know a little fluffin’... a lil' oral somethin' somethin’. I guess Tyson wanted to prove he could 'get it up' beforehand in the back just in case it didn't work out in front of all these people. DB: What makes you the 'Prince of Urban Porn'? RM: I like to push the envelope. I like to do different positions, give a show. I kinda want to be able to have my viewers feel like they are actually in the scene with me. You know, give the eye contact, and give the moans. Positions are key, and I can do so many crazy positions. DB: If someone is to have sex with you privately are you the same as you are in your videos? RM: No. When I'm on camera it's always a show I'm putting on. I'm doing it for the
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Winter 2011
entertainment value. Personally it depends on my relationship and connection to the person. If I'm in a relationship with the person, it's always going to be more passionate than anything I'll ever do on camera. But, if it's just a regular person, really it's just always about getting my nut and then I'm ready to go. But it depends. If I'm 'vibing' with the person, then they can get their nut too. DB: So you’re a bottom, right? RM: I'm personally versatile. But I’m a great bottom. What are you, Mr. Bridgeforth?
DBQ: (Laughter) No comment RM: (Laughter) DB: Are you addicted to sex? RM: No. I honestly don't even have sex like that. There was a point when I was only having sex when I was filming. See, in this business, sex can become meaningless very fast. It can lose its value. You can easily become just a fuck. So it's like, why am I wasting this much energy? I can be saving this for the set. And also for the good majority of my career I was in a relationship with another model.
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heterosexual community. Both are life changers but not life breakers. Not if you don't let it.
DB: Another porn star? RM: Yes. I don't know if too many people still remember his name, 'Pinky Untouchable'.
DB: Who are your favorite porn stars?
DB: How did that work? RM: You gotta find a balance.
RM: Dream, hands down! Also, Lo and Hotrod.
DB: So it’s okay to have sex with someone outside the relationship if you’re getting paid for it?
DB: How many videos have you done?
RM: Yes, that’s pretty much the strict rule you have in that type of relationship.
RM: I'll say between 60 to 85.
DB: What kind of boy—well let's scratch boy and say man— what kind of man do you like? What does he look like? How does he smell? How does he carry himself?
DB: Do you know how many people you've slept with? RM: (Laughter). I think under 80 but over 50. I use to keep track. DB: So you’re single now, and you’re looking?
RM: Yes! Man! I need a man, not a boy! But he can look like different things; I don't really discriminate physically, although I know what my 'nonos' are. I don't do anyone shorter than me.
RM: I'm single and I'm living. DB: Has being a porn star automatically effected your dating? Do you feel every person who wants to talk to you just wants sex? RM: No. I don't think that. I mean it's a thought but I'm surprised if someone doesn't know who I am.
DB: Sad day for all the short people like me. RM: Well, unless I am in my 'top' mood. When I am in that versatile mood, I like my bottoms short, skinny, and slim. Well the thick ones aren't bad either, but you can't be sloppy thick. No, I don't have a particular physical attraction. You have to be funny but not too goofy because some people go over board where every sentence that comes out their mouth is a big ass joke. You must be goal oriented, not just a dreamer. I have to see that you’re motivated and driven. And you must have a backbone because I got a ruthless mouth at times. I call it 'bitchfully honest'. I think it's a Scorpio thing. DB: So it doesn't really matter how he looks. RM: I like unique guys. I will never go for the ' double take', for the guy who is just strikingly gorgeous. I mean I don't go for the ugly ones, but you know not conventionally sexy. DB: Would you date someone HIV positive? RM: Yea, why not, if someone is regularly on their meds and living a healthy lifestyle? It's not a definite that the virus can get passed.
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DB: Who was the best sex of your life? HIV doesn't kill you. Ignoring the fact does. I get tested every 3 to 6 months depending on how sexually active I am. In my field it's a MUST to know your status and not just HIV, but for everything. DB: Are you afraid of getting HIV when you do raw porn? RM: No. Everyone is tested. And they know who has what. They put the HIV negative models together with other negatives and the positive ones together in scenes with other positives. DB: What is your status? RM: (laughing) I'm not going to mention my status in an article. That’s not really for anyone else to know if I'm not sexually involved with him. It’ll just be another thing for folks to question, speculate and talk about. Folks already believe they know what my status is, so I guess that's what it is then. It doesn't really bother me. It comes with the job, I suppose. HIV is nothing to fear though. Being gay and sexually active makes it common, like making babies in the
DBQ Magazine
Winter 2011
RM: Honestly, umm... It actually was two years ago at Washington, DC Pride. It was a stripper. He was a big fan of my work and had this crush on me. He was gorgeous but he had this awkward look to him. We vibed that weekend and lets just say when I went back to Philly I had a happy face. DB: What made it the best? RM: Just the chemistry and the passion. He was aggressive and everything was just on point. Everything I wanted to happen happened when I wanted it to that night. I didn't have to lead him into it. There wasn't any beating around the bush or twostepping. It all just gradually happened. It was a great night. DB: Why are you retiring? RM: I am just tired of making money for other people. I want to do my own thing. DB: You’re doing one last DVD before you retire. What can your fans expect? RM: My scene partners will be all new faces, underground models only, dudes no one’s heard of. I don't want this DVD about anyone else but me. I’ll be the only star.
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What I've Come To Know
David Bridgeforth's highly anticipated inspiration speaking CD, for the 1st time ever created for the LGBT community. It is the one CD ever LGBT person needs to hear to fortify that gay is a gift from God. WWW.DBQMAG.COM to get your copy today.
W
hat if you lived your whole life and at the end of it you realized it was all wrong? This is a question my spiritual godfather, world renowned motivational speaker Les Brown had asked me when I was 18 years old. Unbeknownst to him, I was fighting an internal battle that every gay person fights before they come out of the closet. I didn't want to sin against God or go to hell for being gay. Like most "church grown", "bible fed", "closet cases", I just wanted to do what was right. Pondering the question posed by Mr. Brown opened my ears and my heart to the possibility of a new and vibrant truth. I was told at a workshop shortly after this realization that nothing is truly right or wrong within this world. Your perception is what makes these choices so. This allowed me to gaze at what was right and wrong through my own rose colored glasses. This was the moment the church bells began to rang in my head. In that instance the ashy antique box of truth exploded, shattering the opinions of other people, those both religious and those afraid into a million little pieces. I began to march to the beat of my own drum. I realized that if I lived life by everyone else's expectations and not my own, which to an extent involved following the bible to supposedly make God happy (doing the things that would get me through the pearly gates), than I truly would not be happy. And if at the end of my life there were no pearly gates, I would have lived a life that hadn't come from an authentic place and I would have to whoop someone's ass. This epiphany, this thought expansion of my mind enabled me to see that God's greatest gifts to me were my life and the power to write the story as I wanted it to be written. It has been said that once a mind has expanded to this realization, it can never go back and be satisfied with
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DBQ Magazine
the limiting mold from before. As I evolved into my own truth I was liberated. I began to see the gift from God in being gay. I understood what James Baldwin jokingly said over 25 years ago, "I felt like I hit the jack pot", in response to the question, "How did you feel when you were poor, black, and gay in America?" Gay was the greatest gift I could have been given because it gave me permission to be myself, whatever self that was. I could wear whatever I desired, from skin tight jeans to booty shorts, and that was alright. I could wrap myself in a rainbow flag or wear all pink. I could switch or skip, be masculine or feminine it didn't matter. The only thing that could be said about me was that I was a fag or a gay person, and to be frank, that was true. I am a fag, a feminine man. I am gay. I am a very happy homosexual. In my book these titles held no wrong. I had rewritten the story and deleted the shame often felt in the gay experience. I was more interested in being the best and greatest gay and finding a way to be that individual who changed the lives of those who were homophobic. I became ballsy and gallant. If life was in color I intended to be bright red. I became famous for being a brilliant and chic black gay man who lives, moves, and breathes in love, intention, and purpose. What I've come to know in this season of gift giving, this season of Mary, Joseph, and baby Jesus, this season of snow and winter air is that God's gift to us is life and how we live our lives is our gift to God. No bible scripture distorted and written in fear, nor any loveless religions, nor any closed-minded person should stop you from unwrapping the beauty, gayness and greatness of which you are. For more of David Bridgeforth Follow him on twitter @DBRIDGEFORTH or DAVIDBRIDGEFORTH.COM
Winter 2011
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