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V5I4 DBQ Magazine AUG/SEPT 2015

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DBQ DAVID BRIDGEFORTH QUARTERLY

HOT

LIST

2015

BOLD

BEAUTIFUL

BLACK NYC ATL BLACK PRIDE

ALL THAT MAKES OUR SUMMER FIRE!

BLACKBIRD

STAR

JULIAN WALKER

THE MOST BEAUTIFULLEST MAN ON EARTH

WHAT I’VE COME TO KNOW ABOUT LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS

+

THE

SEX SURVEY

YOUR

RESULTS

ARE IN


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It’s hot and sunny out and everyone has body and most of our community have left their relationship to enter (thot) season with joy and excitement. As my favorite pride season starts and summer begins to end slowly, It is the perfect time to indulge in all the goodness of the summer.

Check out our Hot List 2015, which is a handful of people, organizations and happenings that make our summer fire both in NYC and Atlanta.

The Most Beautifullest man on earth this year is Julian Walker, the breakout star of Patrik Ian Polk’s new film, Blackbird, also starring Mo’Nique and Isaiah Washington –now available on DVD/BluRay. Pg 6.

We have a great excerpt of Craig Stewart’s new book One Thing For Certain, Two Things For Sure. His amazing story continues and we are so proud of his new continuing memoir. Pg 8

Be sure to check out our 5 Things We Love this issue, there are a few things you may want to add to your own personal love list.

Last, but not least, the heart of every issue of DBQ Magazine issue is in my column, What I’ve Come To Know. This issue I share what I’ve come to know about love and Relationships. The summer is almost over, lean into what is best for your soul.

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Roque Caston is a writer, editor, and journalist. He’s a college student majoring in Writing & Literature. His writings have been featured to various digital and print publications such as True Fashionista Now, MUSED Magazine, Floss, Swerv, and The GList Society.

Stanley Bennett Clay is an award-winning novelist, playwright, filmmaker and actor. His 8 novels include Looker, In Search of Pretty Young Black Men and Dominican Heat. As an entertainment journalist, he has interviewed everyone from Michael Jackson to Diana Ross. He lives in Manhattan with his husband Reny.

DBQ Magazine is a nationally distributed bimonthly lifestyle publication. Published and printed in Indianapolis, Indiana. For more information on advertisement, circulation, or articles please visit us at www.DBQMAG.com Or call 908.656.6218.


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DBQ CULTURE

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JULIAN WALKER ‘MOST BEAUTIFULLEST’ MAN ON EARTH

FRONT ROW Twenty-two-year-old Julian Walker was just your average Hattiesburg, Mississippi college student when he attended an open call audition for a feature film shooting locally. Although he had no prior professional acting experience, his untapped, natural talent caught the eye of writer-director Patrik-Ian Polk (“Punks,” “Noah's Arc,” “The Skinny”) and he landed the lead role of Randy Rousseau in the Mississippi-set coming-out and coming-of-age drama "Blackbird". Soon after receiving the script for the film, Julian learned his co-stars would be none other than Oscar-winner Mo'Nique and veteran actor Isaiah Washington. He received a crash course in acting from his new colleagues and wowed them all with his performance, which he completed while attending classes during the spring semester of his junior year. In addition to acting, Julian also sings many songs in the movie and on its soundtrack. Shortly after filming ended, he declared his major as Theatre Arts with a minor in Radio & Television Production and an acting career was born! The openly gay ‘Most Beautifullest’ Mississippian is a recent graduate of The University of Southern Mississippi where he appeared in the school's production of the Broadway musical "Rent" and "Spring Awakening". We sat down recently and talked about his new life as a professional film actor who happens to be that rarest of individuals. Black and open

DB: How it all did start for you? JW: I always knew I wanted to be a performer. In the beginning, when I was much younger, I just wanted to sing. But somewhere grew the urge to become an actor as well. I’d never done anything as major as (“Blackbird”) before. This is my first film ever! I remember recording my audition and emailing it to (film director) Patrik. Apparently, he saw something. I don’t know what it was because the audition video was really bad. But he gave me pointers, and told me to re-record it. After a few back-and-forth emails, he came to scout locations around where I was going to school. So I finally had a face-to-face audition with him. Two weeks later, he tells me I got the part. We started filming a week later. DB: What has been your experience now that you've finished this film? JW: I honestly feel beyond blessed. I’m so thankful for this experience. It feels like a dream. Everyday I’m constantly teasing myself and I’m just saying things like Ok Julian. You can wake up now. I do have a religious background. So I’m

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always praying and asking God to lead and guide me where I need to go in life. I know that was a big part of it. DB: You play gay teenager Randy Rousseau in the film. How do you identify with him? JW: When I first read the character the first thing that stood out for me was his experiences, what he was going through in his life; trying to figure out his sexuality and how he was learning to be an individual. For me, being openly gay, that’s something right off the bat I could connect with. I’m out to my family, but I was hesitant because I’m a quiet person. I tend to keep my business to myself. I don’t really like attention that much. So one of the main things I had to be aware of in doing this film is that if it does really well, I won’t be able to maintain the level of privacy I’m used to. Like me, Randy has a religious background. But unlike me, his mother is totally oblivious to the fact that her son is gay, because he’s trying to hide it, like so many gay people out there. Growing up, I always knew I was gay. I just didn’t know what to call it. I’ve always been comfortable with myself as an individual, but it was always different for other people.

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‘MOST BEAUTIFULLEST’ MAN

ON EARTH

DB: What was your reaction when you found out that you were going to work with Monique? JW: Patrick is so casual with how he tells you stuff. This is how my schedule was at the time. I would go to class. I would leave class and immediately go to the production house to do scene work and go over the script. Patrick would just be sitting there working on his laptop and I’ll just be reading the script. So out of the blue, he casually came to me and said “Oh, Monique signed on for the film. She’ll be playing your mother.” In my mind, I’m thinking “Oh my God!” I was thinking these people were going to say “Why did they choose this new actor? He doesn’t know what he’s doing.” But I powered through it. DB: When you got to meet her for the first time, what was it like, along with acting alongside her?

Now don’t get me wrong. There were times when I was younger I would pray like God is there something wrong with me? I didn’t ask for this. So why do I have to be made fun of because of this or that? I wasn’t as comfortable with myself just like Randy wasn’t. Also, when it came to the love story part of “Blackbird,” there comes a time in your teen years when you meet someone, and you think that’s the ‘someone’ you’re going to be with for the rest of your life. That’s another feeling I could relate to; meeting someone who helps you understand that you’re not alone and there is nothing wrong with you. DB: How old were you when you came out to your family? JW: Eighteen.

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JW: The first time I talked to her, she actually called me. She introduced herself. She asked me if I was ready and that she was so excited to meet me. The first time I met her in person was when we began filming our first scene together. As she’s arriving, I’m wondering if I’m ready. I asked myself Julian, are you ready? I don’t know if you’re ready. It felt like that moment when you’re younger and you’re in trouble, and your parents are about to come. Probably because of something bad you did. I was like Do I look pretty? Oh my God! What’s wrong with me? I don’t know what to do! But the minute she saw me, she gave me the warmest embrace I’d ever felt in my life. It was so much love coming from her. She hugged me and she said “We’re in this together. We got this.” From that moment on, it was just amazing. And the same thing happened with Isaiah as well. Not only just Isaiah, but I have to say the entire cast all the way to the production team. They were so welcoming and warm. It was the best first experience I could have ever asked for. DB: When you came out was your experience like Randy in the film, or was it different? JW: Very different. Luckily, my parents are really supportive. I’m happy I didn’t experience some of the things Randy and kids like Randy experience. People get kicked out of their homes. People get baptized. People experience the worst things you could possibly think of just because they want to be themselves. I am very blessed to be able to live my life the way God made me.

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When we read Words Never Spoken, our hearts sank reading about Craig Stewart and his life throughout the years. We got to laugh with him, cry with him, and be entertained with him. His life story ranges from so many accomplishments to so many setbacks as well. He was the first person in his family to graduate college. His debut stage production, A Day in the Life, had a successful run in Atlanta, giving Stewart the reputation as one of the nation’s up and coming artists. Media mogul Tyler Perry himself gave him props for his originality and ability to attract an audience with the skill for writing relatable stories. Still, there were setbacks as well. Stewart’s opens up about his struggles with love, friendships and a two-year bout with depression that led to an internet sex addiction in his memoir. But he found the strength to power through, and continue with his journey of self-discovery as a gay black man. Now it appears that we’re going to have more of him to read, for he has released the second volume of series of memoirs titled One Thing for Certain, Two Things for Sure. Once again, Stewart allows his readers an intimate look into his personal life through stories that center on dating, love, fear, fate and destiny. Moments that will make you gasp and take in another perspective on life and the human spirit.

I was involved briefly with a married man who believed he had the courage to leave his wife to be with me, and to live his truth. This isn’t the typical story of a married man promising to leave his wife for a secret lover. Rather, this is a story, in part, about a gay man who knew he was gay before he got married, but chose to marry a woman because he didn’t know how to break free.

sending him a woman who could see beyond his past and accept him fully. However, Rocky hadn’t been completely forthcoming with his wife about his relationships with men, and his past wasn’t really in the past. Frankly, his future wife had no knowledge about his partner of ten years, who was also once married, or the three children that Rocky helped him raise.

Rocky shared that he was married, but that he had regrets. He explained that he had come out to his mother and siblings when he was eighteen years old. He sat them down one day in the family room and told them he was gay, but his mom struggled with the truth. In fact, the stress of Rocky coming out of the closet caused his mother’s hair to fall out. Nevertheless, his first gay relationship ensued and lasted for ten years, but out of his family’s sight in another state. Rocky said that he was still romantically involved with men during the course of their engagement because his soon-to-be wife was a virgin. Rocky thought that he would be able to quell his attraction to men once he began having sex with his wife. However, one of the men he dated, for two of the four years that he and his fiancée were together, advised him against getting married because he had once been married himself, and he knew firsthand how Rocky’s story would play out. He told Rocky that over time he would no longer be able to perform sexually, but Rocky ignored his advice and chose to get married with the hope that he could manage his desires for men. Rocky had been molested as a child, so he was convinced that this molestation was the reason he was conflicted sexually, and he convinced his wife to believe the same. He believed God had answered his prayers by

Less than a year into his marriage, Rocky began to realize that the day would eventually come when he would leave his marriage because he fantasized about being with one man long-term. But, leaving his wife was never of urgent concern because he had yet to meet a man he cared enough about to walk away from his marriage. Instead, he would simply live on the periphery of the gay and straight worlds—bobbing and weaving between the two. One month after Rocky and I began communicating he started talking about leaving his wife for me, and I believed him. Rocky made a teary confession that, if we had met first, he would never have gotten married. Today, he’s still locked in that marriage, pretending to be happy, pretending he isn’t gay—even posting pictures of himself on Facebook with his wife to maintain the illusion because he fears disappointing his family by living in the light. I never had any intention of getting involved with a married man or living in my nevers—doing the things I said I would never do such as participating in an abusive relationship, tolerating a cheating partner, or in this case getting involved with someone who was already in a relationship. What I know for sure is the moment we begin negotiating our nevers and compromising our standards is the moment we begin living in our nevers.

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DBQ CULTURE

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5 THINGS WE LOVE

1 2 Invisible Life: The Musical

Audiences gathered at the famous Apollo Theater to watch the long awaited musical adaptation of the debut novel by iconic author E. Lynn Harris. Invisible Life: The Musical, a dramedy directed by Javon Johnson about college football player Raymond and his down low romance with star Quarterback Basil Henders out on delivered night after night with sold shows back to back. Harlem Pride even took the liberty of hosting its opening night. The cast delivered strong performances that will be memorable from every line to every song they performed. Music and lyrics were composed by Nick Asford and Valerie Simpson with additional lyrics by Stanley Bennett Clay. The book was written by Proteus Spann and Javon Johnson. All together, this musical is definitely deserving of something to be loved.

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DBQMAG.COM | @DBQMAG

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The film Blackbird, directed by PatrickIan Polk is officially out on DVD/BluRay and available for online streaming. Whether you’ve seen it at the movies or not, you can now watch it in the comfort of your home. Starring Monique, Isaiah Washington, and newcomer Julian Walker, this film should definitely be added to your collection of LGBT films to watch. Whether it’s having the DVD or streaming it on your computer, you will enjoy this latest masterpiece. For more info DBQMAG.COM.

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DBQ PRIME

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YES NO

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% of our community have had a threesome.

% of our community have had sex in public.

% of our community has sex with friends.

YES NO

% of our community didn’t use condoms their 1st time.

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Treatment allows me to live stronger —Tyrone, Positive since 2006


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I'm a yoga instructor so I pretty much eat, sleep and breathe wellness. I chose to begin HIV treatment to insure that I stay as healthy as possible. Being positive, I also wanted to make sure that I don't transmit the disease to my partner. HIV treatment minimizes the risk of transmission. —AARON

Treatment changed my life very quickly. Within one month of starting meds, my viral load was undetectable, and my T cell count started going up. Today, I've been on treatment for nine years, have maintained an undetectable viral load. I have been afforded the opportunity to experience great health, feel wonderful, and put my energies into making the most of my life. —DARRELL

Without a healthy lifestyle I wouldn't be able to continue my love for performing arts nor my daily activities.Treatment made my health do a 180. —JAHLOVE

In 1996 my t-cell dropped from 825 to 400 in a matter of 3 months, I got really scared. I didn't expecting them to drop so quickly but I was also just getting myself off of all drugs, my doctor had explained to me that because I had never given my body a break from drugs my body was finally getting a correct reading in my labs. I choose to get on treatment knowing some side effects would occur regardless I had to take a chance. Within 3 months my t-cell count was 620. Treatment changed my life. It has been 25 years since I was diagnosed and I believe treatment has kept me around longer and will continue to do it's thing. Having an open mind in this area of my life has changed so much of my life and the people around me. — JACKIE


THE HOT LIST 2015

*

ALL THAT MAKES OUR SUMMER FIRE!

WE ARE

PROUD TO RECOGNIZE THE 2015 HERITAGE AWARD HONOREES. WE ARE HONORED AND EXCITED TO CELEBRATE YOUR MAJOR CONTRIBUTIONS TO OUR COMMUNITY AND WE THANK AND WE THINK YOU ARE SIMPLY HOT!


THE HOT LIST 2015

GMHC’S 25th Annual Latex Ball

Dave Bridgeforth with gay son Que Marcellis at the 25th Latex Ball on July 25th 2015

GMHC has gone through recent changes, but it is still a force to be reckoned with as it still was during its early years. They recently named Kelsey Louie their new chief executive officer, who recently worked seven years at the Harlem United Community AIDS Center. The building has expanded while continuing to provide services and resources for its LGBT clients. The formation of the organization during the AIDS crisis of the 1980s was the basis of the Emmy-award winning TV film The Normal Heart, based on the play of the same name by Larry Kramer. The organization also presented the 25th anniversary of The Latex Ball with this year’s theme being “Year of the Legends.” This year GMHC will be an official sponsor for NYC Black Pride.


THE HOT LIST 2015

#ATLBOSS

VAUGHN ALVAREZ

V

aughn Alvarez is an executive level publicist with over a decade of experience in television production, social media, journalism, web design and executive assisting. He’s also the creator of “The Brandy Blog,” one of the go-to sites for all things Brandy, our fellow Grammy Award winning singer of the same name. Alvarez also serves as a Junior Publicist at the esteemed 135th Street Agency, a marketing and public relations firm based in both New York and Atlanta. Through his work at the agency, Alvarez helped managed the OWN Network, WE tv, and So So Def accounts. Not only that, but the spirited and spiritual Alvarez also has his hands in the gospel arena, serving as publicist for

various gospel acts: J Moss and 21:03 of PMG Gospel, Isaac Carree, Damita and Y'Anna Crawley. He's a talent booker for Reach Media’s ’The Yolanda Adams Morning Show’ and ‘The Nightly Spirit’. He’s also provided his professional skills set at his local church, working as publicity support for The Vision Church of Atlanta, under the leadership of Bishop Oliver Clyde Allen, III. Spearheading campaigns for actress Sheryl Lee Ralph and her D.I.V.A Foundation, Alvarez uses his passion for HIV/AIDS awareness and education. Alvarez also lends his time and resources to Atlanta Black Gay Pride annually by helping to put on “The Pure Heat Community Festival.” Follow Vaughn Alvarez online on Twitter & Instagram @4everVaughn. Also read his blog “The Brandy Blog” at (TheBrandyBlog.com)


THE HOT LIST 2015

MIGHTY REAL: A FABULOUS SYLVESTER MUSICAL #AtlantaGetReady For one night only, have a hot night with your buddies in ATL by going to see the Off-Broadway musical Mighty Real: A Fabulous Sylvester Musical. Based on the true story of Sylvester, better known as “The Queen of Disco,” this musical is a dedication to the 1970s, and the person who made his mark on that decade. The musical has already found its way singing tunes and entertaining its audience across America, and will next play a special one-night-only performance on Saturday, September 5, 2015 at The Variety Playhouse (1099 Euclid Avenue NE, Atlanta, GA 30307). Tickets are now available. Visit www.FabulousSylvester.com for tickets and information.

Harlem United is a nationally-recognized nonprofit organization with a 26-year history of providing life-saving services to some of the most underserved and hard-to-reach communities in New York City, with particular focus on Upper Manhattan and the South Bronx. Our mission is to provide full access to integrated health care and social services for clients experi- encing multiple and complex issues—HIV/AIDS, social stigma related to sexuality and gender identity, mental illness, chronic substance and alcohol use, homelessness, and extreme poverty—regardless of race/ ethnicity, socioeconomic status, or sexual orientation. Today, we operate as a fullyintegrated, patient-centered medical home for our communities. For more info visit HarlemUnited.org

HARLEM UNITED #ThePrideOfHarlem


THE HOT LIST 2015 INTRODUCING

# NYC #TheChildrenAreTalking

DAISHA & OUR PRIDE

JOY

What inspired your artistry? Life experiences inspire my artistry. Whatever I’ve experienced or am experiencing at that moment. It is also inspired through things I observe when I walk the streets of NYC.

What female artist do you admire? I like strong woman who are confident in their skin; Janet Jackson, Gwen Stefani, Sia, Jlo, Missy Elliott, Beyonce, Sheila E, and Santigold to name a few.

Is there a message in your music, and if so, what is it? I'm sure there will be several messages and they will change as I change. But right now, my message is to live life to the fullest and be yourself no matter how others may see you.

What's your favorite album? I really don't have one. My music changes with my moods.

How old are you? I am 105. I was very wise to drink from the fountain of youth. Lol.

Back-up dancer for Hot HipHop and R&B artistes such as Rihanna, Diddy, Ryan Leslie and Letoya Lucket, makes her way to the center stage just in time for NYC Black Pride in August to showcase her music and her artistry. Daisha grew up in Columbia, MD and now reside in Brooklyn, BedStuy – do or die.


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There are so many truths about relationships that are growing inside the center of my bones like a wild flower. And there also are a few lessons and experiences I haven’t come to terms with because of my own personal fear and disbeliefs. But what I’m clear enough to know now is that I have a personal responsibility to share my journey. That way, the many brothers and sisters all over the vacillating orb of dust and shade can look ahead, see this bridge I’ve built, and be inspired. It is today and will always be my intention to cause my generation to step into their worlds and turn up the color and volume. To meet each day better and wiser than we were before. With that said, here are a few of my most dominant truths that I’ve come to know at this time. Relationships are about expanding our capacity to give and receive love with others and ourselves. It’s about growing into unconditional love for self first and then for our partner. I’ve learned that all drama in relationships is created by the egos that we bring into it. Therefore, I’ve come to learn to leave my ego for work and art (it can be healthy to let it run wild there), and be egoless in my relationships. Ego is that part of us that makes us right and our partner wrong, even if it’s true. The ego is that part of us that would rather fight or hurt our partner because they did something to us instead of hearing their cry for love in the middle of their seemingly unloving actions and showing up as who they really are, and who they really are is love. Relationships are about giving and receiving just that. I’ve also come to realize that we must be careful about who we give our hearts to, and who we cast our pearls upon. Because once we start loving someone and they become special, it is hard to cut that love off, and anytime we cut ourselves off from love, we can feel the disconnect down deep inside. If we are thankful for the things we love and we keep ourselves focused on those things, then the things we don’t care for will slowly disappear from our experiences, or we will evolve to a place where we won’t really care for it, or even remember what it was that we didn’t like. Let me be clear, if we continue to point out, talk about, nag, focus on the things we don’t like about our partner, what happens is that the universe – begins to pick up on the contrast we put out, and will move that partner out of our lives, thereby making us available for a partner who is more of what we feel we want. If we love the one we have and the person means something to us and we are not interested in another person, just a better experience with that person, then love them and only focus on the goodness. There is no need to leave or run from our relationships because wherever we run to, we will find ourselves at the exact same reflection we were before, for our relationships are mirrors reflecting our internal stuff for the evolution of our souls into everything we’ve asked for.

I’ve also learned to take nothing for granted because when we do, we will find ourselves missing and looking for all things we had, but never gave our grateful attention to. It is also many times very rare to find someone who will choose to love us even when we aren’t easy to love. To love someone when they are wrong, or are hurting us, or when we don’t approve of their behavior is difficult, but when someone decides to show up with that kind of love, I believe they’re worth fighting for. What I’ve come to know is that relationships at the end of the day are never really about the other person’s growth. It is about our own. Once we ground and center ourselves in the truth of that, we no longer will fight and push against all the different things that show up in our relationships. What we know is that everything is coming into our experiences because we’ve attracted it simply because there is something amongst the contrast that is for us to experience that will allow our growth. It is all about our growth. It is not our responsibility to make sure our partner is growing, for that is their own personal responsibility. What I know is that God is love and love is all, and if we can stand and hold the God Love within (which is the essence of us), and have enough balls to love the partner in front of us as much as we love ourselves, not only will the love we give change our lives, but we will look at our lives and see all that our hearts have ever desired is in front of our very eyes.

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