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david atlanta magazine

1874 Piedmont Avenue 390-C Atlanta, GA 30324 Mon-Fri 9:30am-5:00pm Phone: 404.418.8901 Fax: 404.418.8901 ext. 7 www.davidatlanta.com mail@davidatlanta.com

publisher

Matt Neumann matt@davidatlanta.com

associate editor

Katie Stover stover@davidatlanta.com

theater & arts editor

Tony Smithey tony@davidatlanta.com

graphic design

Matt Neumann Travis Barrón Katie Stover

photography

Brian Sawyer Matt Neumann Jeff Jackson Jesse Hancock Tony Smithy Les Bouska

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10 blushing blooms 14 brent star 20 momma mona 28 atlanta devine 36 datebook 46 blake’s brunch 50 vagitarian 53 health fair 62 atlanta a-z 70 frugal faggot 72 manhunt seen@ 12 16 38 64 68 guides

52 horoscopes 54 bartab nightlife guides 56 directory 74 adult classifieds 78 bitchsession

contributors

Katie Stover David Muller Luis Chiruco Jesse Hancock Lydia Lunch Tony Smithey Mary Beth Morrison

cover

Matt Neumann

cover and feature photography

Justin Monroe

classifieds

Luka Simone

office manager Carson Abele

operations & finance

Brian Sawyer brian@davidatlanta.com

sales & account management Steve Tyrrell sales@davidatlanta.com

marketing & promotions

Chip O’Kelley chip@davidatlanta.com Torren Moore torren@davidatlanta.com

national ad rep

Rivendell Media 908.232.2021

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Opinions expressed by any writer appearing in this publication are not necessarily those of the staff, management, advertisers, organizations or persons appearing in this magazine. No Part of this publication may be reproduced by any means: electronic, mechanical, photocopy recording or otherwise without written permission from the publisher. The mention, appearance or likeness of any person, business, organization, or event in this publication is in no way to be taken as any identification of the sexual, social or political orientation of such persons, businesses, events organizations, staff, shareholders or owners of such. DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE is not responsible for claims made by advertisers, errors or changes in information, events and schedules in ads, features or calendars. DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE reserves the right to reject or cancel any advertisement submitted. All copy, text, graphics, photo’s and illustrations in submitted ads are published with the understanding that the person and business’ submitting such are fully authorized and have secured proper consent for the use of images, graphics, pictures, names, logos and testimonials used in such ads and that DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE may lawfully publish the same. By submitting such materials, the advertiser agrees to indemnify and hold blameless DAVID ATLANTA MAGAZINE from any liability resulting from the publication of any such materials or images.

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Be surrounded with great food, music and fun with nonstop entertainment and an authentic New Orleans vibe at Harrah’s New Orleans. Located in the heart of downtown, get access to all the action, on and off the casino floor. The fun times keep on rolling, only at Harrah’s New Orleans.

SCHEDULE IN SOME WILD FUN: Gay Mardi Gras March 4 – 8

Easter Parade April 24

Southern Decadence August 31 – September 5

Essence Festival July 1 – 4 Halloween October 31

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New Business ‘Blooming’ in Midtown

By Jesse A. Hancock

Just In Time For Valentine’s Day! Blushing Blooms By Brennen 1830 Piedmont Rd. Atlanta, GA 30324 404-333-8002 Hours: Monday – Friday 11:00 – 7:00 Saturday 10:00 – 5:00 Sunday 12:00 – 4:00 Minimum $50 order for delivery Price range: $20 and up Any occasion Order online or by phone

loral arranging is truly an art form, according to sole owner and operator Brennen Farlow of Blushing Blooms By Brennen, a brand new business in Midtown. “You can put two florists together and one of them can make the arrangement look more expensive than the other, depending on their techniques and experience and using the same amount of product,” said Farlow. “Certain things have to be showcased. You have to have an eye for everything.” Farlow’s business officially opened in early January and is sort of a side business of shops owned by his mother and grandfather. His mother, Kathy Van Mannen, has owned a floral business for 38 years, and his grandfather owned one for over 50 years. Having

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been in the business “his entire life,” Farlow says it’s in his blood. “I wanted to create more of a floral boutique versus a traditional flower shop,” said Farlow. “So it’s a little more modern, more minimalist, a little more showy. I’ve always thought of naming my own business ‘Blushing Blooms By Brennen,’ ever since I can remember.” Business is already picking up. He is doing all the floral arrangements for the upcoming production of “The Wizard of Oz” as part of the Gas South Broadway Series at the Cobb Energy Center. For now, Farlow is running the boutique with the help of his mother and sister and will be hiring a full time delivery driver soon. Although time consuming, Farlow says he loves every minute. “We plan to be open seven days a week at least for the first year,” said Farlow. “A lot of floral shops close weekdays by 5:00 p.m. I wanted people to have time after work, if they are going to a dinner party or something, to stop in and get some fresh flowers to go or whatever they need. Or on Sunday after church if people are having a gathering at their house. We’ll always be here.” Farlow said he eventually plans on making the shop like a Chicago-style “bucket market,” which will mean “tons of flowers everywhere, unusual varieties, and an abundance of things.” However, he plans on making it affordable, yet not the cheapest in town either.

As walk-in business picks up, he plans to be able to provide more selection for the public. He says he is happy to be in his own shop, which is also conveniently close to where he lives. Before opening the shop, he recently did all the floral arrangements for a million dollar wedding out of his garage. He also did 17 weddings last year. He says the new location is perfect for a new business. There are 42,000 cars that pass by the shop each day, according to the research and statistics. “Business has picked up so much that I decided I had to open up a shop,” said Farlow. “Valentine’s Day should mean huge walk-in business for us.” Farlow grew up on a street called “Hog Jaw Road” in North Georgia, near Chattanooga, Tennessee in a small town called Chickamauga. He says he lost his country accent when he moved to Atlanta. He has “a little bit of art background” but says his mom got him involved in the business even as a child, but he never felt forced or taught. Farlow is also a painter and artist. Some of his works are on display in the shop. He likes the idea of “go green” art, using recycled materials, and says he enjoys creating art when he has some down time. “Floral arranging just came natural to me,” said Farlow. “My mom is one of nine children who can all professionally arrange flowers. Once I showed interested, my mom taught me the basics of running and operating a business. On weekends I used to go and run her shops as a teenager. There was a time where I considered other professions, but this is my life and I love it so much. I’ve known since I was 12 or 13 this is what I wanted to do. It’s more than a passion.” With so many floral shops in town, Farlow says there are lots of good reasons why customers should shop at Blushing Blooms By Brennen.

“We care about the customer, which is our number one priority. I like to establish a friendship with every single customer I have, and I want them to come back again and again.”

“We are not a 1-800 style flower shop,” Farlow. “We are not part of any of the online marketing places. We do not do assembly line production work, and we don’t do copycat reproductions. We are absolutely unique, and everything we do is with artistic flair. We care about the customer, which is our number one priority. I like to establish a friendship with every single customer I have, and I want them to come back again and again. I don’t want to charge someone an arm and a leg for a product and never see them again. A flower arrangement will not leave this shop unless it has passed 100% perfection. Every single time. That’s what’s going to make this business stand out among everyone else.” Farlow says he plans to continue working hard to make the business a success and continue being aggressive in getting out there and meeting with people who need floral arrangements. “We’re gonna fight and fight and fight,” said Farlow. “We do a lot for charities and are very giving. And we’re very friendly to all of our customers who walk in. I believe having that business mentality of treating a customer like a friend rather than a paycheck will bring in repeat business.”

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The Brent Star Report DRAGNIQUE

uPaul did it again. A few years ago, I couldn’t stop chatting “You better wurrrrk!” as the kids sashays away on a pretend runway wherever we were. Now, it’s hard not to quote his command line, “The time has come. The time is now, for you to lyp synch for your life (overly dramatic 5 sec pause) And don’t f@ck it up!”. Well, it’s not only a catchy line, but the drag pot has been brewing up all kinds of new and exciting flavorful dishes. First off, there are THREE new drag shows on Mondays (and guess which one I’m in)….first, DRAGAMUNDO, 8pm show at Las Margaritas hosted by Budda D Liscious and Angelica D’Paige, special guests, and plenty of salsa child. Then there’s RuPauls’s Drag Race Season 3 showing at Blakes with season 3 contestant Phoenix and of course, the Monday Mayhem show at Einstiens off Juniper with Nicole Paige Brooks, the other season 3 contestant Mariah Paris Balenciaga, and someone with the last name ‘Star’ (hi reader, just checking up on you...have you figured out which one of these 3 shows I’m in?). I’ve been seeing folks bar hop these 3 places as if they just can’t get enough of this Monday Mayhem! And the one person I’ve been seeing everywhere wearing crazy outfits and wearing just as much glitter on her face is Eve Michaels, the whore and creator behind her and the Jungle’s drag competition show called DRAGNIQUE (on Fridays). Seeing everybody there reminds me of the excitement ppl had back in the day when legendary Charlie Brown produced her Drag Idol at the Underground. Dragnique started early this year in January and having it’s finals THIS FRIDAY, Feb. 18th! It’s been so successful that I’m told another round will start in like a month later, so heads up for you new comers (hmmmm. I like the sound of “heads up”. Na.). So yea, here’s a quick run down of what you missed at Dragnique (not in any particular important order). 1. Super androgynous entertainer Genre made a surprise appearance in a duet with one of her drag monsters, Pandora Pussybox, and worked the crowd into a frenzy. 2. Phoenix’s daughter, Janelle, tore the crowd up with her take on “Welcome to the Jungle” causing one of the guest judges, Jazmine Antoinette, to take off and throw her panties out onto the stage in the middle of her critiquing which was hilarious and scary. 3. Weekly head judge Nicole Paige Brooks and host Eve Michaels read each other for points EVERY week! They’re worse than Ryan Semen Crest and Simon Cow. 4. Pageant emcee queen Celeste Homes made the crowd ‘gasp’ when she went in and read one of the contestants up and down with NO mercy AND her poor back up dancer. 5. We hadn’t seen Mary Edith Pitts in awhile, but her alto ego, Richard,

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came out to represent Jerusalem House. Actually, that’s one of the positive thing about this competition, every single Friday money is being raised to go to multiple charities (hell I need to raise money to pay my high ass gas AND light bill from these harsh and brutal winter months!). 6. On my guest judging night, I did a production number that ended in a thriller dance routine with Coochie Gabanna, Mimi Simone, Cliffery, Alana Kellie and of course the Mouth of the Mouth, burkhart’s own, Princess Charles. And now the time has come for the last three contestants to lyp sync for their lives! The finale is expected to be huge…get there early, and ‘remember ladies, don’t. fuck it up!” Until next week, don’t read the girls please….instead, read The Brent Star Report!

A Moment in Black History In 1985 Maya Angelou was recognized for remaining on The New York Times Paperback Nonfiction Bestseller List for two years. It’s the longest record in history! Honey, in other words, stop reading and get to writing! Write about that trick in your life (who’s probably more of a ‘tick’ than a ‘trick’. Damn. Tricked.).

In 2006, Whitney Houston, celebrated singer, songwriter and actress, was named the ‘most awarded female artist of all time by the Guinness World Records”. And she still is! (On a side note, she also holds the award for selling the most of her awards on ebay! Just kidding, I Will Always Love You Whitney!) Where to catch Brent Star: Mondays at Einsteins (with RuPaul’s contestants Nicole Paige Brooks of season 2 and Mariah Paris Balenciaga of season 3), Saturdays at Tijuana Garage Thursdays and Sundays once a month at Burkharts and everywhere else that pays! www.facebook.com/Mr.BrentStar

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QUESTION

Ask Momma Mona Dear Momma Mona, I recently contracted Herpes from who I thought was going to be a very long term relationship. I am a responsible person, take care of myself, and cautious when it comes to sex. I purposefully inquired as to whether this person had any STDs before we engaged in sexual behavior WITH A CONDOM. After several weeks (10) when we both expressed a desire for a long term relationship, the condom came off. But, within 2 weeks, I experienced a small pimple type bump on my penis, which I went straight to my doctor about. He did not think it was anything, but the biopsy came back positive for Herpes.

ANSWER

I don’t know that you can imagine how I felt when that phone call came in a few days later. It was a very good thing that it was around lunch time and I was at work because I needed a forced distraction while this sunk

in. He knew I went to the doctor about this and still said nothing. Then, when I confronted him, he still claimed not to have Herpes. Thankfully, we did not move in with each other and it was easy to say f*#@ off. Well, only in words. I’m so torn between rage and hurt that I can’t think straight. This has gone to my very core. First, this was a relationship that I thought would be my last. Second, I’ve managed to stay STD clean for 38 years. What do I do now? Join the ranks of “don’t ask, don’t tell” and just pass it along? That doesn’t sit right with me. I would never put another at risk even for a cold. Momma Mona, what words of wisdom do you have for me? I really need something about now. In Crisis Mode – Please Help

Dear Crisis Mode, WOW. This is quite a crisis for someone of your outstanding caliber. Accolades to you for standing strong for your values, and also for your respect of others. What a blow. I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me just in reading your story. Wish I could give you a big hug right now because you really need one. Now to address the reality of this situation. First - and very GOOD NEWS, your partner really may have NOT known that he is positive for herpes. In fact, it could very well be that YOU simply have been dormant and not known that you have had herpes for some time. Yep, some statistics state that up to 75% of people do not know they have herpes either because their herpes is totally dormant or the symptoms so mild that they don’t even notice. Ask your partner to get tested. Of course, unless he is not positive, you will never know who gave to who, but at least this introduces a possibility that your partner truly is not in the know about herpes and the two of you may be able to get over this together. http://www.ehow.com/ about_6506373_dormant-herpes-virus.html Second, while there is no cure for herpes, there are new treatments available to reduce symptoms and to decrease the risk of transmission to a partner. Talk to your doctor. Research the Internet. Herpes is a very manageable challenge that affects one in six people

(and that’s a very conservative statistic!). And, get this, 85% of people have oral herpes! And, keep in mind that with so many people out there unknowledgeable about whether they are herpes positive or not, it is important to approach your own diagnosis of herpes with as much knowledge as possible. Third, having a diagnosis of herpes does NOT define who you are. It is what it is – a minor aspect of your being that only reveals itself with a partner, and even then it may never be an issue because of medications or the fact that neither of you experience many outbreaks anyway. I share with you the ideal belief and value that if someone IS knowledgeable that they are STD positive for anything, they should disclose before engaging in sexual behaviors. I also believe that people should play nice. Again, it is what it is. After the initial shock, educate yourself, nurture your wounds both physically and emotionally, and move on. If the emotional wound has reactivated old wounds, as is usually the case, then this might be an opportunity to seek counseling to address the old wounds. For example, if this situation has reactivated trust issues from another time in your life, now is the time to address because relationships invariably WILL be challenged with trust issues. Tackle it now so that you may avoid issues later. Momma Mona wishes you a safe and healing transition!

Share YOUR thoughts and experiences with other David readers! MommaMona@DavidAtlanta.com 20 davidatlanta

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The Stud Advantage

t’s no secret we are a culture consumed by image. Consider the following: over his career, a goodlooking man will make $250,000 more than his least-attractive counterpart. It’s called the “beauty premium”: the idea that pretty people, whatever their aspirations, tend to do better in, well, almost everything. Handsome men earn, on average, 5 percent more than less-attractive men. They get more attention from teachers, bosses, and mentors; even babies stare longer at good-looking faces (and we stare longer at good-looking babies). A couple of years ago, when the economy was thriving, we might have brushed off those statistics as superficial. But in 2011, when employers have more hiring options than ever, looking good is no longer something we can dismiss as frivolous or vain. When it comes to the workplace, its looks, not merit, that all too often rule. We spoke with former model turned business financier, Dorian Black, on how his beauty has helped him rise up the corporate ladder. Has anyone ever told you that you look like Robert Downey Jr.? Dorian Black: I have heard that. It depends on the day. When I am unshaven, I get Hugh Jackman. 26 davidatlanta

By Mark Gray

Do you agree that being attractive has opened doors for you? I believe attractiveness is more than just good looks; it’s an overall appeal. If one presents with confidence, his energy and passion will be evident and people will subconsciously gravitate toward him. What role have your looks played in your quick rise up the corporate ladder? My rise up the corporate ladder wasn’t due to good looks. So much of my business takes place overseas. Oftentimes I’m at my desk holding meetings via conference call so clients can’t even see what I look like. Still, I admit my looks can be an advantage when I eventually meet a client in person to close the deal. Do you rely on your looks to close a deal? No, it’s more accurate to say I rely on my polished presentation. I think a well-presented businessman is always going to come off as organized, successful, and driven. My looks are a small part of it. The confidence I exude plays a much larger role. Do you believe you would have that same confidence if you were 5’ 6” tall and 200 pounds? Confidence doesn’t depend on weight or height. I work with all facets of individuals, large and small, who know they are great and aren’t afraid to show it off.

Have you mastered the art of influencing people and getting them to like you? Before every meeting, I do my research on the companies and the executives I will be in front of that day. Recently, I met with an oil tycoon from Texas. Through research, I discovered he enjoyed 18th century art that focused on polo championships. In the first hour of our meeting, most of our conversation was centered on his love; particular artists and styles. We eventually got to discussing business and within 15 minutes, he agreed to invest with my company. So you influence people by pretending to have an appreciation for what they enjoy? I strive to build a connection to their world. That allows them to trust me. Its not manipulation; its communication. What do you do to maintain your looks? I do 45 minutes of cardio every morning, followed by weight training in the afternoons and diligent boxing twice a week. How important is diet? I eat six small meals a day, with limited amount of sodium. And yes, I get one day off a week to eat what I like. But, I have found that lately, I prefer to eat healthy even on my days off. How important are clothes? Clothes are essential to the presentation. I wear labels but I never buy them unless they are on sale. Recently, I bought a Prada Suit that was 60% off. I advise guys to spend $250-$300 on a suit. Spend a bit more on the tie and shoes and wear a shirt that requires cufflinks. What about the briefcase? If you are going to splurge, splurge on a great briefcase. It may sound strange, but it is something that everyone notices. It is an accessory that spells out the type of client and employee you can and will be. I recently scored, finding a $2000 Zegna briefcase for 80% off – now that’s a bargain! How important is it to be up on football and golf stats? I have found discussing sports before a meeting is a cop-out. It’s too general. If you do the research on the executives you will be meeting with, then you can lead the conversation to more polished subject matters that they will be interested in. Is there something else the well-groomed man should know if he wants to fit in with the white collar set? My father always told me, “be willing to spend money to fly first class, because you never know who you will be sitting next to”. It could be your next boss or client. Have your looks ever been a detriment in the board room? No, but my youth has. Not everyone is willing to take a COO in his early 30s seriously. But, as long as I maintain my confidence, without going overboard and falling into cockiness, I’m usually able to convince them I’m the right man for the job. What advice can you offer men on how to raise their attractiveness to get more attention on the job? Eat well, exercise, and be the best you can be. The well groomed man is polished and exudes confidence. You will find that being attractive requires not just a good suit, but also a great attitude and a lot passion.

I believe attractiveness is more than just good looks; it’s an overall appeal. If one presents with confidence, his energy and passion will be evident and people will subconsciously gravitate toward him. davidatlanta 27

Miss Atlanta Devine Continental

he Atlanta Devine Continental Pageant system began its journey five years ago with the crowning of Isabella Diamante as its inaugural queen.

entertainers to include: Mokha Montrese, Miss Continental 2010; Necole Luv Dupree, Miss Continental 2007; Isabella Diamante, Miss Atlanta Devine Continental 2009;

The years to follow have been no less stellar, with many Atlanta Devine winners captivating audiences and judges and garnering recognition at the national level. With Tamisha Iman reaching the top twelve, the stage was set for excellence to follow. Both Melania and Amailia continued to raise the bar by ascending to the top five, with Amailia capturing the 1st runner up position to CoCo Van Cartier in the Miss Continental Plus 2009 competition. Most recently, Danielle wowed the crowd with her infectious lyrical dance routine.

and the current reigning Miss Atlanta Devine Continental, Danielle DeLong. Serving as hostess for this year’s pageant is the vivacious Celeste Holmes, featuring the incomparable Jessica Black, the current reigning Miss United States.

Miss Atlanta Devine Continental 2011 is poised to move the next level of brilliance and sophistication on Thursday, February 24, at 8:00pm sharp! This year’s contest promises to be one to remember with a spectacular line up of sensational

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This year’s competition will not feature a Plus, category, but the executive committee has appointed the lovely Arione DeCardeza to represent the organization at nationals. Don’t miss your opportunity to entertained, enthralled and enchanted as Atlanta Devine Continental reflects on five years of excellence and looks forward to furthering its legacy of pageantry excellence.

Monday Mayhem! Mondays at 8pm. No Cover Charge! • Drag Show featuring contestants of Ru Paul’s Drag Race! • 9pm Screening of Ru Paul’s Drag Race with the contestants! • DJ McCracken! • Food and Absolut drink specials Sponsored By • As always, free valet parking! • Double loyalty points

Mariah Season 3 Brent Star Mr. Entertainer Nicole Paige Brooks Season 2

1077 Juniper St. Atlanta, GA 30309 404.876.7925 einsteinsatlanta.com

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WALK-INS WELCOME 1579 Monroe Drive • Atlanta, GA 30324 • 404.876.7745 32 bubblesatlanta.com davidatlanta

Men’s Haircut $20 Women’s Haircut $30 Sunday Haircuts $15

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Date Book

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Date Book

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Restaurant Review

DID SOMEBODY SAY BLAKES FOR BRUNCH? I DID. R

egardless of what restaurant I may write about Sunday’s are always without question reserved for Brunch and I love it for two reasons, one, it’s an excuse to have a cocktail during the day and two, it’s an excuse to have a second cocktail… during the day, and the food is there to soak up the Martinis so I don’t end up in a cab three hours later on my way to the airport screaming, “We don’t need clothes, we’ll buy them when we get there!” With that being said I decided that it was time to have Brunch at my favorite watering hole anytime of the week day or night at Blake’s on the Park. You’re thinking to yourself, isn’t that where Kitty LeClaw gets her groove on? Yes you are correct my little Chuppies, but Blake’s is not just for Drag Shows, though I do love each and every event that happens there, it’s also about the food. My “Girlfriend” (We shall name her Suzie) and I decided to walk up and discover what Sunday Brunch was all about. First I might add, it was the perfect sunny day and Blake’s had the French doors open so we could hear the Jazz quartet as we approached and we loved that! What goes better with brunch? Music! I must say that I have been to a few establishments where the band was a tad too loud which made it difficult to have a conversation but this was not the case, the acoustics were such that you could talk to the person across from you without any distractions. Then there is the buffet, we were very pleased with the variety of choices, if all you wanted was fruit and salad, it was there. If you wanted the Italian sausage

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and peppers (which was prepared to perfection) you had that option. I do love to put the feedbag on at these things and this particular Sunday morning I had pretty much everything. The baked Tilapia with a Mustard Chive sauce was round two after succumbing to the customized Omelets with Cheddar and Hash Browns and the potatoes had an ingredient that made them perfectly delectable. I actually had a second helping with my fish. Suzie had the Chicken Tetrazzini with linguine and mushrooms which were filled with flavor, at one point Suzie had to tell me to go and get my own. Our host and mixologist Rusty informed us that the lunch portion of the buffet changes weekly so go to Blake’s FB page or Google them to find out what else the chef might be creating for that day. It seems that last Sunday we missed out on the Krispy Kreme’s for dessert, but this particular day the Chef made Baklava which was as good if not better than Mother’s (Sorry Mom). I failed to mention that the buffet has everything and more for a mere……$12.00! Shut the front door! That’s right I couldn’t believe it! But back to what I talked about earlier….The Cocktails! Suzie had a Bloody Mary with all the right spices, but what blew my knickers off was Rusty’s hand crafted Mojitos, rum, mint, and simple syrup. You might think it’s simple, but this Mojito was made with love….So I had two. Rusty also informed me that the Mojito’s are only made from 12:30 -2 every Sunday. So when it’s Brunch you want and a strong cocktail to put that rosy glow on your face, Blake’s is the place.

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The Vagitarian

n case you forgot Valentine’s Day, are trying to make up for a failed attempt, or did not find the perfect valentine until after Valentine’s Day had passed, don’t worry. It’s not too late to celebrate love with someone very special. I’ve come up with a Happy Belated Valentine’s Day Plan. Check out some of my favorite spots in Atlanta and win her over. Buy her a box of chocolate, and she will think you forgot Valentine’s Day. Buy her intimate gifts (lingerie, sex toys, etc.), and she will think that you only have one thing on your mind, sex. Make her something homemade from the heart, and she will know that she one very special girl who you care about very much. Local stores, like Sam Flax, carry an enormous array of items that can cater to your crafty needs. Utrecht, Michaels, and our local antique shops are great places to find supplies to make the perfect gift.

By Katie Stover

A way to the heart, isn’t just through a man’s stomach; women love to eat a great meal too! My top picks for the perfect Valentine’s Day dinner are:

N’AWLINS Located in East Atlanta, N’awlins offers an intimate atmosphere, amazing Cajun and creole cuisine, and delicious drinks that won’t break the bank. The chef, Frankie, and his staff are some of the nicest and most genuine people I have met in Atlanta thus far. I highly recommend anything on the menu. Stop in for dinner at N’awlins, and stay after hours when N’awlins transforms into MSR for a night of dancing and good music. Tell em’ Katie sent ya!

SAUCED www.saucedatlanta.com You can find this little gem in Edgewood. Sauced has a great atmosphere, great DJ’s, and some of the best food and drinks that you can find anywhere in town. The food and drinks are unique and creative, and it’s a great spot for a romantic dinner, or a casual first date. Sauced is definitely a place worth checking out. You won’t be disappointed.

BOCADO www.bocadoatlanta.com Head over to the westside and stop at Bocado. Bocado means “mouthful” in Spanish. The name speaks for itself. The atmosphere is absolutely beautiful. The menu is inviting and focuses on delicious meats, cheeses, and fish. Bocado has something for everyone. Their “commitment to quality and to the farm-totable approach starts in there own backyard with a sustainable garden featuring fresh herbs.” I highly recommend the chesapeake flounder with succotash, elephant garlic, and vidalia onion vinaigrette. I would also suggest that you make reservations in advance. The restaurant is small and fills up pretty quickly. You don’t want to miss out on this unique experience. Her stomach will thank you later.

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After dinner, grab a drink and dance off those calories at some of my favorite spots:

Looking for something relaxing? Instead of barhopping, visit:

AURUM

PIEDMONT PARK

www.aurumlounge.com

It is close. It is beautiful and... It is FREE. Pack a lunch or dinner, find a cozy spot for you and your special someone, and enjoy the outdoors.

Aurum is a great spot right in midtown to stop in and have a cocktail. The atmosphere is contemporary, the lighting sets the perfect mood, an the bartop itself is gorgeous. “With posh seating, specialty cocktails, and light bites, Aurum has quickly become the premiere spot for Atlanta’s most discerning sophisticates.”

BELISSIMA Off Amsterdam Avenue you will find my favorite lesbian bar. The ambiance is blissful, the atmosphere is modern, the bartenders are friendly, the drinks are great, and they host of the of best comedy shows in Atlanta every Thursday. Stop by Bellissima on Thursday nights to check out Brady Smith and the gang for the comedy show, grab your girl and drink, and laugh til’ it hurts!

ART SHOWS/ WALKS Atlanta is home to many amazing galleries. Some of my favorites include: The High, Youngblood, Kai Lin, Beep Beep, and The Contemporary. Check out www.artrelish.com or www.burnaway.com to check out what is happening in the art community right here in Atlanta. Take advantage of what Atlanta and its emerging artists have to offer.

MJQ www.mjqatlanta.com MJQ is my favorite spot in Atlanta hands down. It is great to stop by on the weekends, but Wednesday night it is the place to be. Its grungy, artsy, laid back, fully equipped with PBR, and it has the best DJ and dance party in Atlanta. If you and your woman love to dance, love great music, and are looking for a place to let your hair down and get sweaty on the dance floor-- check out MJQ. You will be hooked. See you on the dance floor!

I hope you all had, or have, a very special Valentine’s Day with the one you love. Hope you all get a chance to check out the spots I have listed, and like them as much as I do. Have a great week!

Questions or Comments? Email me at Stover@davidatlanta.com davidatlanta 51

Horoscopes Aries Take action this week— things are getting weird, but you can rise to the challenge for sure. Let your people know what’s really going on as you jump from place to place, fixing it all as you go.

SAGITTARIUS You need to get creative this week — fortunately, you’ve got the best kind of energy for just that! See if you can take some time for yourself to find some new way to express yourself.

TAURUS It may feel as if the whole world is against you, but you’re only partly right — you’ve still got lots of allies! Just because a few people are pushing you hard, that doesn’t mean you have to take it.

CAPRICORN Your ability to push beyond boundaries and keep at it no matter what is quite valuable this week, so make sure that you keep your spirits up and keep yourself from doubting whether or not it’s all worth it.

GEMINI A good friend needs to bend your ear — but you might not like everything you hear. See if you can get them somewhere quiet and private, because their advice may take some time to un-spool.

AQUARIUS Try to explore some new neighborhood this week — preferably one featuring people who are quite different from you. It’s the perfect day for you to broaden your horizons and maybe change your life.

CANCER Your emotional side is all too easily riled up eight now, so you may want to avoid potentially explosive situations. Your energy is great for big fights, so if one needs to happen, get into it soon!

PISCES You are somewhat puzzled by a friend’s or coworker’s behavior this week — but don’t sweat it. The good news is that they are sure to explain themselves by next week at the very latest, and all will make sense.

Leo You need to enjoy yourself a little more — why not? Your energy is just right for making sure that your mind is fully engaged and that the people around you feel as free as they can to speak their minds. VIRGO Financial business is plaguing your mind right now, and you need to take it seriously — and slowly! Don’t just jump on the first solution that presents itself, as you’ve got to get it right this time. LIBRA If you think there’s no compromise to be had, that means you didn’t try hard enough. Things may get weird, but you are the master of splitting differences, so suggest something that makes all parties feel like winners. SCORPIO No matter what you’re doing this week, make sure that you’re as methodical as possible. Your energy is sure to help you plow through work one step at a time in a way that really impresses the right people. 52 davidatlanta

The Flaming Sugarbaker Sisters’ Health Fair is still on!

n February 26th, Novice Sister Prissy GoLightly is bringing a Health Fair Expo to Amsterdam Café. The midtown based venue located on Amsterdam Walk in midtown will feature local non-profits especially targeting the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered communities. MISTER, a program of Positive Impact, will participate offering information on free HIV and STD screening, riskreduction services and offering volunteer o p p o r t u n it ie s with outreach projects and the community center. Promising more than just resources for health and safety, services for nontraditional families and social networking options will also be available from 4:00pm to 7:30pm. Organizations such as The Atlanta Lesbian Health Initiative, Positive Impact, AID Atlanta, United 4 Safety, Michael Teal – Licensed Massage Therapist, Queer Justice League, Emory Hope Clinic – Life Forward Vaccine Center, Georgia Equality, Lambda Legal and Officer Brian Sharp will be present to provide information, volunteer opportunities, and link

potential clients to services. This not to be missed event will also be offering up a variety of door prizes. The Flaming Sugarbaker Sisters are an order of 21st century nuns dedicated to the manifestation of cosmic joy through freedom of expression, chartable acts, community outreach, and social activism. The Sisters were formed in 2009 by Novice Sister Gunza Blazin, Novice Sister Ivana Pocahotass, Novice Sister Fiddle D. Dee, and Novice Sister Rapture Divine Cox. MISTER is a onestop resource for gay and bisexual men to increase awareness of available resources and services, and to promote social and sexual health. The program also provides a community center for gay and bisexual men dedicated to providing information about available programs and services in Atlanta, health and sexual educational materials and free condoms and lubricants in addition to free rapid HIV testing and STD screening. For more information v i s i t M.I.S.T.E.R. online at http://www. positiveimpact-atl.org or call 404-589-9040x137.

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W E D N E S DAY

3 Legged Cowboy - Intermediate 2 Step @ 8-9 Amsterdam - Get L.I.T. All Day Specials Bellissima - Karaoke 8pm BJ Roosters - Male Bar Top Dancers - 8pm-1am Blake’s - FEATHERS & FLESH BURLESQUE REVUE 11pm Burkharts - Karaoke 10:30pm Club 91 - The Main Event Cabaret & Talent Show Followed By DJ Rick The Eagle - 80s Music with Travis-Tim’s Black Jack Friends on Ponce - 3D Thursdays Disco & Dazzle with Diva Jasen Heretic - Boys Night Out-Mandatory Dress Code Party Or Go Shirtless-DJ Lydia Prim 10pm Las Margaritas - Karaoke 8pm LeBuzz - Hump Night & New Entertainer Showcase Mary’s - DJ Yes Sir Spins Rock 9pm Mixx - Texas Hold’em Poker 7:30 - 10pm Model T - Karaoke 9PM Oscar’s - Wicked Wednesdays 80s Music Videos 8pm Tripps - Taco Buffet 5pm Swinging Richards - 2-4-1 VIP Room Woofs - Woofs House Trivia starts at 8:00pm 3 Legged Cowboy - Dance Lessons @ 8-9 - Ladies Night Amsterdam - Rita’s & Smirnoff Tini’s Special Bellissima - ‘The Midtown Comedy Show’ / Open Mic at 9pm BJ Roosters - Male Bar Top Dancers - 8pm-1am Blake’s - Texas Hold’Em Poker 7pm-The Shawnna Factor Show 11pm Burkharts - Princess Charles’ Fashionistas Show 11:30pm Club 91 - Customer Appreciation FREE ALL NIGHT The Eagle - Karaoke with Mikey-Tim’s Black Jack Felix’s - Karaoke with Brett & Tyler 10pm Friends on Ponce - HOT NIGHTS With Jasen and Donnie Heretic - AZUCA-Latin Night Hot Latin Tribal Beats with DJ Karlitos 10pm Las Margarita’s - Crazy Bitch Bingo 7:30PM LeBuzz - Ladies Night Shows Mary’s - Themed Parties Reto DJ’s Swinging Richards - 2-4-1 Door & 2-4-1 VIP Room Tripps - Karaoke with Darlene 9pm Midtown W – Chris Coleman Presents “Indulge” 9pm-Midnight Mixx - Karaoke 9pm-1am Kamikaze Karaoke Contest 11-Midnight Model T - Robert & Michael serve up their Best! Woofs - Meet and Greet for “Gathering Time”! Daily Food Specials

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F R I DAY S AT U R DAY

3 Legged Cowboy - Family Poker 7:30pm Amsterdam - Showtunes 9pm BJ Roosters - Male Bar Top Dancers - 8pm-1am Blake’s - 1/2 Price Appetizers 11am-8pm-Blake’s Wild Card Show11pm Burkharts - Family Feud 11:30pm Club 91 - Swagg Tuesday’s The Eagle - Rock Music-Free Pool with Tony Felix’s - Smirnoff Martini Night Friends on Ponce - Let’s Make A Deal Heretic - Time Warp 70s 80s 90s Music with Paul-Dance Floor Open 10pm Las Margaritas - Crazy Bitch Bingo 7:30pm LeBuzz - Talent Search & Karaoke Mary’s - CJ Hosting Mary-Oke @ 10pm Mixx - Texas Hold’em Poker 7:30 - 10pm Model T - Always a Party! Wyatt, Gary & Elvis serve up their Best! Oscar’s - Show Tunes & Glee 8pm Swinging Richards - $5 Cover After Midnight Woofs - Free WII from 4:00 till close - Industry Night!!

S U N DAY

Amsterdam - Video Request Night - Industry Night 9pm BJ Roosters - Male Bar Top Dancers - 8pm-1am Blake’s - Drag On The Edge Show 11pm Burkharts - Karaoke 10:30pm The Eagle - Comedy TV-Free Pool with Tony Felix’s - Free Pool Friends on Ponce - Afternoons with Jasen 2pm Frogs - $1 Tacos 6-9pm Heretic - S.I.N. Night with Brian - Dance Floor Open 10pm Jungle - Stars of the Century Show 11pm Las Margaritas -Dragamundo (formerly Dragamaki) with Bubba D. Licious and guests LeBuzz - Man Dance Cabaret - GOGO Dancers - Drink Specials 8pm Mary’s - Open 5pm - DJ Va Jay Jay Spins Mixx - Live Pianist 9pm - 1am Model T - Service Industry Night! Discounted Drinks! Woofs - Texas Hold’em 8pm

T H U R S DAY

T U E S DAY

M O N DAY

Bartab Nightlife Guide

3 Legged Cowboy - Sugar Baby’s Trailer Park Revue-10pm Amsterdam - DJ Dance Party Bellissima - Live DJ Entertainment BJ Roosters - Male Bar Top Dancers - 8pm-1am Blake’s - Kitty LeClaw’s Meow Mix Show 11pm Burkharts - Best Drag Shows In Atlanta 11:30pm Club 91 - It’s Bingo Bitch Hosted by: Auntie Snickers Chaparral - Got Leche? 10pm - Hot Latino Dancers The Eagle - Club Nights-DJ Dance Party Felix’s - Bartenders Ray & Cory - Serve it up! Friends on Ponce - Happy Time With Daniel and Terry Heretic - Special Guest DJs-Dance Party 10pm Jungle - Dragnique Talent Search Competition. Doors Open 9:30pm. Dance Party Follows LeBuzz - Dance Party & Show Mary’s - Open 5pm - Boys Room Party - Themed Party - Love DJ Mixx - High Energy Music Videos 9pm-1am Model T - Poker Night 9pm Swinging Richards - Open 6:30pm - $10 - Hot Naked Men and Big Cocktails Tripps Bar - Laser Show Dance Party with DJ Steve Lynch Woofs - Great Food, Drink & Good Times

3 Legged Cowboy - Dance Lessons @ 8-9 Amsterdam - High Energy Videos 9pm Bellissima - Live DJ Entertainment BJ Roosters - Male Bar Top Dancers - 8pm-1am Blake’s - Jealouse’s Daring Divas Show 11pm Burkharts - Best Drag Shows In Atlanta 11:30pm Club 91 - RT Parties brings you Klimaxx Dance Party with Miss Sophia (go go dancers) DJ Maestro, DJ Rick, DJ Scrilla spinning on two floors all night The Eagle - Club Nights-DJ Dance Party Felix’s - Karaoke with Brett & Tyler 10pm Friends on Ponce - Open @ Noon with Bob Brewer Heretic - Special Guest DJs-Dance Party 10pm Jungle - Special Guest DJs Dance Party LeBuzz - Saturday Night Fever Show Mary’s - Dance Party Hot Mess 9PM Differnt DJ Every Week Mixx- Dance Party 10pm - 3am Model T - Free Tacos! All The Fixins! 3:30 pm to gone! Sanctuary - Sextasy Latino Night, Divas Show and DJ Dance Party Swinging Richards - Open 6:30pm - $10 Tripps - Cookout 2pm Woofs - Great Food, Drink & Good Times Amsterdam - Sunday Brunch 11:30am - 3pm Showtunes with a Twist 7pm BJ Roosters - Male Bar Top Dancers - 8pm-1am Blake’s - Sunday Brunch 12-3-DJ’s Bill Berdeaux & Daryl Cox Spin All Night Burkharts - Sunday Spectacular Show 9pm Club 91 - Lions Den Legendary Sunday’s DJ Sedrick & DJ Brooks Felix’s - Bloody Mary & Mimosa Wallet Pleasers Las Margaritas - All You Can Eat Brunch 11AM-3PM Model T - Sunday Dinner 3pm Tripps - Complimentary Buffet 3pm-Karaoke 7pm Woofs - Great Food, Drink & Good Times

See Guide on Page 62 for Locations

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Gay Atlanta Guide

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1. Amsterdam 502 Amsterdam Ave. 404-892-2227 myspace.com/amsterdamatlanta

20. Mary’s 1287 Glenwood Ave. 404-624-4411 www.marysatlanta.com

PRIVATE SOCIAL CLUBS 40. Eros 2219 Faulkner Rd. 404-287-4482

2. Bellissima 560-B Amsterdam Ave. 404-917-0220 myspace.com/bellissima_lounge

21. Mixx 1492 Piedmont Rd. 404-228-4372

41. Manifest 2103 Faulkner Rd. 404-549-2815

22. Model-T 699 Ponce De Leon Ave. 404-872-2209 www.modeltatlanta.com

Atlanta Tourist Spots

3. Blake’s on the Park 227 10th St. 404-892-5786 myspace.com/blakesonthepark 4. BJ Roosters 2345 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-634-5895 www.bjroostersatl.com 5. Bulldogs 893 Peachtree St. 404-872-3025 6. Burkhart’s 1492-F Piedmont Rd. 404-872-4403 www.burkharts.com 7. Chaparral 2715 Buford Hwy. 678-886-3205 8. Club Europe 4001 Presidential Pkwy. 770-452-1240 www.thelionsdenatlanta.com 9. Club Opera 1150-B Crescent Ave. 404-872-1150 www.operaatlanta.com 10. Eagle 306 Ponce De Leon Ave. 404-873-2453 www.atlantaeagle.com 11. Felix’s 1510-G Piedmont Rd. 404-249-7899 12. Friends On Ponce 736 Ponce De Leon Ave. 404-817-3820 www.friendsonponce-atl.com 13. Gilbert’s 219 10th St. 404-872-8012 www.gilbertscafe.com 14. Heretic 2069 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-325-3061 www.hereticatlanta.com 15.HOBNOB 1551 Piedmont Ave. 404-968-2288 16. Joe’s on Juniper 1049 Juniper St. 404-875-6634 www.joesatlanta.com 17. Jungle 2115 Faulkner Rd. 404-844-8800 jungleclubatlanta.com 18. LeBuzz 585 Franklin Rd. (Marietta) 770-424-1337 www.thenewlebuzz.com 19. Las Margaritas 1842 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-873-4464 www.lasmargaritasatl.com

23. My Sisters Room 1271 Glenwood Ave. SE 678-705-4585 24. New Order 1544 Piedmont Rd. 404-874-8247 25. Opus 1 1086 Alco St. 404-634-6478

A. Atlanta Botanical Gardens B. Atlanta History Center C. Atlantic Station D. Centennial Olympic Park E. CNN - Atlanta F. Fox Theater G. Georgia Aquarium H. Georgia State Capitol I. High Museum of Art J. Margaret Mitchell House K. The Atlanta Opera and The Atlanta Ballet L. The Atlanta Symphony Orchestra M. Virginia-Highlands N. World of Coca-Cola O. Zoo Atlanta

26. Oscar’s 1510 Piedmont Ave. NE www.oscarsatlanta.com 27. Swinging Richards 1400 Northside Dr. 404-352-0532 www.swingingrichards.com 28. 3 Legged Cowboy 931 Monroe Dr. 404-876-0001 www.3leggedcowboy.net 29. Tripps 1931 Piedmont Cir. 404-724-0067 30. Woofs 2425 Piedmont Rd. 404-869-9422 www.woofsatlanta.com 31. 91 91 Broad Street SW 404.581.0577 www.91below.com GYMS/SPAS/BATHS 32. FLEX 76 - 4th St. NW 404-815-0456 33. Gravity Fitness 2201 Faulkner Rd. NW 404-486-0506 34. Workout Anytime 2140 Peachtree Rd. 404-351-3264 RETAIL/BOOKS/DVDS 35. Atlanta Leather Company 2070 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-320-8989 36. Brushstrokes/Capulets 1510 Piedmont Ave. 404-876-6567 37. Boy Next Door 1447 Piedmont Rd. 404.873.2264 www.boynextdoor.biz 38. Outwrite Bookstore & Cafe 991 Piedmont Ave. 404-607-0082 39. Poster Hut 2175 Cheshire Bridge Rd. 404-633-7491

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CLUB ARGOS 1923 WaltonWay-706-481-8829www.clubargos.net THE FILLING STATION @ The Parliament Resort 1258 Gordon Highway-706-828-7400 www.gayaugusta.com/thefillingstation

MACON

KAOS 2780 Riverside Drive – 478-621-0662 www.kaosmacon.com SYNERGY 425 Cherry Street – 478-755-9383

SAVANNAH

BLAINE’S 13 East Perry Street-912-233-6765 www.blainesbar.com CHUCK’S BAR 305 West River Street-912-232-1005 CLUB ONE 1 Jefferson Street-912-232-0200 www.clubone-online.com UNADILLA The Lumberyard @ Lumberjacks Resort 50 Highway 230-1-877-888-1688 www.lumberjackscampground.com

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TENNESSEE

AUGUSTA

CHATTANOOGA IMAGES 6005 Lee Highway-423-855-8210 www.mirage-complex.com CHUCK’S 27 W. Main Street- 423-265-5405 ALLAN GOLD’S 1100 McCallie Avenue-423-629-8080f

AL ABAMA

G EO R G I A

Out of Town Directory BIRMINGHAM THE QUEST 416 24th Street South-205-251-4313 www.the-quest-club.com OUR PLACE 2115 8th Avenue S. 205-715-0077 JOE’S ON SEVENTH 2627 7th Avenue South- 205-321-2812 www.joesonseventh.com

DOTHAN

CLUB IMAGINATION 4129 Ross Clark Circle 334-792-6555

MONTGOMERY

CLUB 322 322 N. Lawrence Street - 334-263-4322

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2011

THE AMERICAN CRAFT COUNCIL SHOW COBB GALLERIA CENTRE ATLANTA MARCH 11-13

SAVE TIME AND MONEY: BUY DISCOUNTED TICKETS ONLINE! CRAfTCouNCiL.oRG/ATLANTA Above: Covered bowl by Gartner/Blade Bottom L to R: Glass bowl by Michael Schunke, Adirondack chairs by Robert Erickson

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Atlanta A to Z

By David C. Muller

EPISODE THIRTY-SIX:

“L is for Lesbians” Once upon a time Luke went to a palm reader in Gwinnett County. The palm reader told him, “You must move to Atlanta, Luke, for you will find love there.” Luke unlocked the door to his fantastic, down his throat and looked back in the fridge. He high-ceilinged apartment in a large erection of glass checked the expiration date on that plastic Publix on the corner of Peachtree and a street named with bottle: it had expired on Monday- Valentine’s Day- and a number. He went in to his super-modern sleek and Luke said: stylish kitchen and opened the refrigerator. There “I’m going to need some more milk.” were only four items inside: half a dozen eggs, a bottle Luke also needed sugar and he decided, of orange juice, a stick of better and a nearly empty right then and there, to seek out the assistance of plastic bottle of Publix milk. Luke checked the freezer: a neighbor. Although he had lived in this same the bottom shelf was stacked to capacity with various apartment for the past nine months, Luke had never versions of Absolut: Absolut Mango, Absolut Peppar, once met any of the other residents from the building. Absolut Mandarin, Absolut Citron, and Absolut Ruby Luke knocked on the next door and heard the muffled Red. music of Melissa Etheridge oozing from the other side. “Oh those Swedes,” Luke laughed to The door opened inward and there stood a himself as he took a glug of the original blend, “they woman, “Yes?” have such wacky spelling!” He poured the libation 62 davidatlanta

“Hi, I live next door.” Luke held out an empty sugar jar, “Do you have any milk?” “You live next door?” The woman reached out with her hairy arm and pulled Luke inside a party of purples and pinks. Seated around the room were women of all shapes and sizes; each woman a different color, they each held a glass of red wine and nibbled on charred cupcakes, stalks of celery, sticks of carrots and hors d’oeuvres of deviled eggs, tofu sausages in flourless pastries and on patties of rice and wheat germ. The music changed and the music of the Indigo Girls emanated from hidden speakers. Luke overheard their conversations: “I told her I like to take it slow with her this time and do you know what she did on our second date? She brought over a U-haul truck and a motorbike, and that was after the spectacular new Sunday brunch they have now at Las Margaritas!” “I know the place; I did the plumbing when they put in those new Mexican toilets.” “What the hell kind of party is this?” Luke was brought before a raven-haired beauty dressed in a plaid cotton shirt and form fitting jeans capped with a white belt; she wore decorative pumps and, in Luke’s opinion, she was quite pretty. “Natalie,” said the hairy-armed woman, “this guy says he’s your next door neighbor.” “Hi there.” Natalie smiled; she had perfect white teeth, “It’s nice to finally meet you. I read this column,” she offered her hand in friendship. “I understand your name is Luke?” “Wow!” Luke said, “I’m impressed, I didn’t think anyone actually read this stuff.” “Let me introduce you to my friends.” Natalie took Luke by the hand, “We’re having a little party for my friend, Consuela. She just bought a green card from the authorities.” Natalie brought our hapless hero into the center of the room. “Ladies, I want to introduce all of you to my next door neighbor. This,” she presented him, “is Luke and, like most of the men reading this drivel, he is a homosexual.” The women “oohed” and “aahed” and Luke waved, “Hi.” “Let me go around the room for you. That girl over there,” Natalie pointed to a blonde with closecut cropped hair dressed in a crisp suit; she crossed her legs and wore a pair of men’s sneakers, white in color, “that’s Melanie and she’s my on again-off again lesbian muff-diver. Next to her is Shaquifah.” Luke raised his eyebrow, “Is that really your name?” “Don’t you make fun!” Shaquifah was big and black; her hair was piled high and braided into cornrows bright with colors of scarlet orange and muted chartreuse, “I’ll snap your cracker ass in half if you make any comments about vaginal flatulence.” “This here,” Natalie motioned toward a petite Asian woman dressed like a school girl in a uniform that included a pleated plaid skirt, “this is Ping-Pong and she comes from the Far East.”

Luke nodded at the Asian, “It’s nice to meet you.” She responded by pushing a pair of glasses up the bridge of her nose, “Ni-hao.” Luke asked, “Who was that girl with the hairy arm who dragged me in here?” “Oh her,” Natalie rolled her eyes. “That was Heidi. Heidi is here with her girlfriend but…” Natalie glanced around the room, “I don’t know where they are right now.” Suddenly there was a crash; the sound of glass breaking and the sound of a slap. A door opened and, from out of nowhere, a beautiful, busty brunette dressed in a golden tight sequin cocktail dress stormed through the room. Chasing after, there followed a larger woman dressed in baggy pants and a white sleeveless shirt that revealed a permanent tattoo: “I k.d.” “Please, Suzette! Don’t leave me. Think of our children; think of our dogs and the turtle!” The golden tight sequin cocktail dress turned on her heel and glared at the white sleeveless shirt and the baggy pants. “Go screw yourself, Heidi. I don’t ever want to see you again! I want you to get you clay and your paints and your feminist ideology and I want you to get out of my house. You hear me, Heidi? We are through!” She yanked the front door open and stepped out into the fluorescent hall light, slamming the door shut behind her. Silence befell the room; everyone sat stunned. Heidi started to sniffle and Natalie said, “That was Suzette and I’m guessing she just dumped her girlfriend.” Heidi heard that and got angry. She glared around the room and snarled, “I swear to all of you, I will get Suzette back or else! If I can’t have her, no one will!” Heidi threw back her head and cackled like a witch. Luke widened his eyes, “Oh boy.” “Oh God,” Natalie shook her head and sipped her wine, “Wait until next week!”

Tune in next week for another installment of “DYKE vs. DYKE” in EPISODE THIRTY-SEVEN: “M is for Melanie” “ATLANTA A to Z” would LOVE to hear from you! QUESTIONS, COMMENTS, SUGGESTIONS: We welcome your feedback! Send us an email at: AtlantaAtoZ@DavidAtlanta.com AND AtlantaAtoZ@Gmail.com

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The Frugal Faggot

t’s Monday morning and you just woke up late for work. You are slightly hung-over from Sunday Funday and there is no time to pack something to eat. Your bank account has just a few dollars in it before your next pay check—just enough to grab a double cheeseburger from the McDonald’s $1.00 Value Menu for lunch. Next thing you know you feel like crap, your boss is breathing down your neck over a deadline and you are updating your Facebook status to reflect that Monday’s suck ass. Sound familiar? Last week, the First Lady visited Atlanta in order raise awareness over childhood obesity and espouse the message that healthy habits start young, but eating is expensive. Correction. Eating healthy is expensive . . . and time consuming. In an age of .99 and $1.00 value menus, we ‘re constantly forced to choose between price /convenience and our health. I didn’t have the most nutritious of diets as a kid. There was always a piece of fruit in my lunch but our cupboards were stocked with Twinkies, Doritos and my favorite to this day, Oreos. When I reached high school my lunch mainly consisted of french fries and the occasional slice of pizza. So when I turned 30 last year changing my eating habits was a hard adjustment . . . and even harder on my wallet.

In the past six months, I have tried to incorporate more fruits and vegetables into my diet but it isn’t cheap. In addition to the price factor, sometimes the fruits and vegetables get messy pretty quickly (a lot like some of those Sunday Fundays). This just ends up being wasted money (again, a lot like those Sunday Fundays) Enter the solution. The Dekalb Farmer’s Market. I swear by my weekly trips to Dekalb Farmer’s Market not only for the money I save but the freshness of their produce. Purchases there have outlasted produce purchased from Publix and Kroger by over a week and for items such as garlic, shallots and spices (fresh or dried) the savings really add up. In addition to produce, you can often find meats, breads, pasta and cheeses - much fresher - with prices comparable to their large grocery chain counterparts. But what about time Frugal Faggot? Between work and my social life, I just don’t have the time to cook. I often use my Sunday mornings (after 11) and early afternoons before going out to whip up a few tasty, cheap and healthy meals that last me through the beginning of the week. In just two hours you can be sure when you wake up Monday morning you will have something to eat for breakfast and something to take to work that’ll make you the envy of your coworkers. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day (no, coffee doesn’t count – I don’t care how much crap you add to it). This great breakfast casserole recipe can be made on Sunday (before Sunday Funday bloody mary brunch), popped into the oven Monday morning while you’re getting ready (and attempting a recovery). Don’t worry, that recovery can take a few days - there’ll be enough for leftovers for the entire work week. And as an added bonus , it can be made for under $10.00 (which is great since you probably spent half your week’s grocery budget on Sunday drinks). 70 davidatlanta

8 ounces of ciabatta bread cut into small cubes* 1/2 pound of turkey sausage ½ cup of chopped green onions* 1 ¼ cup of fat-free milk 1 cup of reduced fat shredded sharp cheddar cheese 2 large eggs 1 (8-ounce) carton of egg substitute 2 tablespoon of chopped fresh parsley (optional)* *- Items to be purchased at the Farmer’s market Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. Place cubed ciabatta bread on a baking sheet and toast for about 8 minutes Heat a skillet over medium heat and add sausage to pan cooking until browned and crumbled. Combine sausage, bread cubes and green onions in a large bowl. Combine milk, cheese, eggs and egg substitute in another bowl. Stir. Add milk mixture to sausage and bread mixture tossing well to coat the bread. Pour mixture into a baking dish. Cover and refrigerate overnight. Next morning preheat oven to 350 degrees. Uncover casserole and bake for 40-45 minutes. Sprinkle with parsley and enjoy.

This breakfast is not only healthier than a morning trip to McDonald’s, it’s also less expensive and it only takes about 20 minutes to prep (we’ve all spent that much time in a morning drive-thru) and it should last you through the week. Make sure to visit the Dekalb Farmer’s Market to purchase your ciabatta bread; they sell a 16 oz. package of ciabatta rolls for $3.49. You can use the rest during the week as sandwich bread or throw into the freezer to use throughout the week as a complement to a pasta dish or anything else you might cook for dinner. Eating healthy is really only half the battle. In order to stay in tip-top shape, make sure you’re exercising during the week. Need a gym? I suggest a great deal over at Colony Square Athletic Club where a monthly membership is only $19.00 month. Visit the David Magazine website for additional recipes and to see MY week’s menu, complete with recipes, and my very low grocery bill. Pick up David Magazine next week where my article will tackle the Oscars—movies on the cheap and an Oscar’s party for 20 people on a budget of $125.00!!??!!! Not sure if I can pull it off but we’ll see!

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Manhunt Mobile Adds 175,000 Users in First Month

The Launch of Mobile App to America’s Leading Gay Hookup Website Exceeds Industry Expectations

anhunt Mobile, the companion application of America’s leading gay male hookup site, Manhunt.net, announced this morning that it has added 175,000 users in its first month. Available on both the Apple iPhone and Google Android, Manhunt Mobile launched in January. The app offers members mobile access to more than four million Manhunt users around the world. “Manhunt Mobile is the first gay hookup app to be available on both the iPhone and Android platforms,” explained Online Buddies CEO Adam Segel at this morning’s announcement. Online Buddies is the parent company of Manhunt and Manhunt Mobile. “A large part of the success of Manhunt Mobile is due to the app being an extension of the website. The app offers a seamless integration with the web so that regardless of what platform members are using mobile or web -they can access and communicate with all four million Manhunt members.” App users rate the ability to check their mail from both their computers and mobile devices as one of the best functions of Manhunt Mobile. They also give high marks to the ability to view multiple photos through member photo galleries. The launch of Manhunt Mobile has also increased membership to the website. Before the launch, the website averaged 28,000 new sign-ups each week. Since January, that number has grown to 30,000, a ten percent increase. “The integration of the web with the mobile app is key because it is what sets Manhunt Mobile apart from its competitors,” continued Mr. Segel. “When you become a mobile member on Manhunt, you’re automatically a web member too. Members are no longer restricted to speaking to guys who share their same mobile platform. Manhunt Mobile opens doors to millions of men looking to hook up via phones and computers.” 72 davidatlanta

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Protect Your Monster

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By Richard Marshall

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Bitch Session Yes, I’ll support you when you’re trying to quit smoking. No, I am not content being your verbal punching bag. Honey, living with your parents at age 30 with your BF is just pathetic.

Hey, bitch. If you have something to say, stop using Bitch Session and get some balls.

To the grey-haired lesbian at the same bar night after night: shut up! Even with all the Red Bull you drink, you are tired, and no one cares what you are babbling about. It’s bar talk, not a political summit. To the grey-haired lesbian again . . . Who cares? It has been two hours since my first bitch and you are still babbling. Shut up! Some clubs in town really need to shorten their drag shows! Or at least make them better.

Compared to your BF who doesn’t talk to you If you don’t stop trying to screw every man and just acts like a prick, you are boring. Yes, I’m trying to date, I’m going to break your I am exciting compared to all these bitches. face with my pint glass. All you do is hang out at the same bar four times a week. Get a life.

You can nyot talk to my friend, Piss Flaps, like that!

Stop judging. I’m on disability and living on my own. Not in my parents basement at age 30 with my BF who is on disability like you. Another Valentine’s Day single. It’s such a LOSER!!! gay day. Where are you, Cupid? Please shoot Thank the gods football season is over! I like the man of my dreams and send him my way. watching sweaty men on my TV, but not like It is becoming more and more fashionable for that. Really! celebrities to come out of the closet. Come on Anderson and Ryan, we’re just playing along with you.

Don’t judge me because I need to eat breakfast.

You say I’m negative and a bore lately. Maybe Honey, your butt implants are messing up. it’s because you are screwing around with Better get some more surgery. And that wife your ex and expecting me not to notice or beater in January with your cliché tattoo care. I love you, but I’m planning my escape. showing? Really, I just want to hurl. Yay, Glee is back. The girls playing football? Quit asking me if I want shots just because you think you are hot in just your underwear. The football team singing and dancing at Your black mane reminded me of the horse halftime? Can we get any more unrealistic? The plot is getting dumber and dumber, but from She-Ra. it’s so fun to watch Who are you trying to kiss with that breath? I turned away because it smelled like So XTina messed up the national anthem? something died half way down your throat. Does anyone really care?

Gotta Bitch?

? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitc ch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? ? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitc ch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch? Bitch?

Text it to 404.969.BTCH(2824) 78 davidatlanta

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