Darling Magazine North Surrey Spring 2019

SPOTLIGHT ON

Cobham

ELIZABETH HAMMOND

Winter Haze by Jo Quigley

Calm Horizons by Henrietta Stuart

Battersea Red II by Richard Knight

Sunset Bay Kames by Emma Davis

The Affordable Art Fair, Battersea 7 - 10 March (Stand G6) Surrey Contemporary Art Fair, Sandown 15 - 17 March (Stand 3) Contact us for free tickets for both fairs

Take advantage of our interest free Own Art scheme

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118-120 High Street, Esher, Surrey, KT10 9QJ

Tel: 01372 466740

editor’s letter Dear Darling Reader,

Cover Girl Elizabeth Hammond

Publisher Darling Magazine UK Karine Torr Editor Karine Torr 020 8739 0059 Advertising 07930 396356 Email

I love watching my daughter growing up. What sort of woman will she be? How do I ensure she feels confident in the modern world, is able to be the best she can; and enjoys healthy and rewarding relationships? Speaking in this edition to Ascot Racecourse Director, Juliet Slot, and this month’s inspiring woman, Elizabeth Hammond, one of the major topics of conversation is how they succeed in a man’s world. The day this becomes an irrelevant question will be when we have achieved a properly inclusive workplace. Women and gender issues continue to grab the headlines and in our article ‘The Tipping Point’ we highlight the urgent need to forge a more gender-balanced world. I wonder if it will happen in my daughter’s lifetime? Here’s hoping.

Some fabulous women ‘doing it for themselves’ were in attendance at Cobham’s Ivy Brasserie business lunch and you can see the pictures in our social pages. Cobham was buzzing that day and everyone was commenting on how vibrant the high street was looking. Our Cobham spotlight features many of the best shops and businesses in the village – go see!

Along with success in the workplace, naturally as a mum, I hope my daughter finds ‘the one’. Enjoy Kate Greenhalgh’s musings on the joys of planning her daughter’s wedding: a witty piece of writing - and not a bridezilla in sight.

northsurrey@darlingmagazine.co.uk

Go girls!

Contributors Holly Candlish Kate Greenhalgh Ali Clifford

Holly

Darling Wimbledon Karine Torr 020 8739 0059 Darling Richmond & Kingston Marja-Leena Toseland 07802 949836 Design Director Hermina Williams design@herminawilliams.com Website Design wimbledonvisuals.com Printer Direct Colour mark@directcolour.com Distribution Right Distribution Whilst every care has been taken to ensure that the data in this publication is accurate, neither the publisher nor its editorial contributors can accept, and hereby disclaim, any liability to any party to loss or damage caused by errors or omissions resulting from negligence, accident or any other cause. Darling Magazine does not officially endorse any advertising material included within this publication. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in any retrieval system, or transmitted in any form – electronic, recording or otherwise, without prior permission from the publisher.

Features Editor, Holly Candlish | hollycandlish@gmail.com Editor-in-chiefs Karine Torr and Marja-Leena Toseland northsurrey@darlingmagazine.co .uk CONTENTS 6 9 11 14 18 19 21 23 25 26 29 30 32 33 34 35 36 38 39 40 42

Elizabeth Hammond, inspiring coach and mentor Charlotte goes peachy for spring Spotlight on Cobham – local special feature Ascot, as Royal as they come. Juliet Slot CCO Kids enjoying exercise at David Lloyd Vessy gets Gale back on the dance floor Thembalitsha transforming lives in South Africa Sophie Kahn keeping tabs on The Bill De-stressing with Dr Mariette Jansen Online grooming - Breck’s tragic story Andy Clark introduces the new NRT Therapy Women of the World unite!

Paul Mendelson’s Spring Bridge Darling interview with Reed’s Head, Mark Hoskins McAllister Thomas Fine Art leading the way Paul Lock – Star portraits Darling’s Out & About with Holly Candlish What’s Hot picks – the latest ‘must haves’ The rise of women’s networking Darling Diary for what’s on At last… a wedding for Kate

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COACH & MENTOR Elizabeth Hammond is a leading UK individual 1:1 Life and Executive Coach and Mentor Consultations are held in Surrey and London

020 3207 7779 reception@elizabeth-hammond.co.uk / elizabeth@elizabeth-hammond.co.uk elizabeth-hammond.co.uk

inspiring woman

BRINGING OUT THE BEST Elizabeth Hammond believes that through life evaluation and coaching, we can create the best life for ourselves. So does that explain who she is today? Life Coach Elizabeth Hammond talks to Holly Candlish about her turbulent upbringing, her stellar city career and Action for Children, a charity close to her heart

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lizabeth Hammond is smart, successful and stunning: with two beautiful children and a husband with whom she recently celebrated her 25th wedding anniversary. Sitting crosslegged in her tasteful Oxshott home, immaculately dressed and practically flawless, Elizabeth is the first to admit that she has a wonderful life. But proving the old adage true, that you can’t judge a book by its cover, she reveals the challenges she faced growing up.

“My story’s not dull. I was the youngest of four from a deeply Catholic family, and sadly my mother died in a flu pandemic in 1969. Within a year, my father married his shop local

second wife and I inherited a step-brother, Mark, who became my ‘twin’. We enjoyed an idyllic childhood running free, chasing rabbits in Shropshire. However, the rural nirvana was shattered in 1979 when Teresa, my elder sister, joined the army and mysteriously disappeared on a private jet bound for Jeddah. The family was left reeling and we all dealt with her death in different ways: my father embarked on an all-consuming mission to find out what happened using our military connections to discover the truth and my brother sadly took a darker path and died after a lifetime of drug abuse. I went off the rails only pulling it back after university when I started work.” As for what had happened to her sister,

she concludes, “My father’s investigations revealed that Teresa was actually working for MI6 and was tortured, and probably killed, because of that.”

It’s a shocking account of a family living through a trauma and goes a long way to explain why Elizabeth is so successful as a coach and counsellor; but how Elizabeth has ended up so strong, resilient and happy is harder to fathom. She admits her father had a positive influence, “He was a grafter and a very successful business man. He ensured we never lost our family sense of optimism and fun and told me that you have to take responsibility for your life.”

Armed with a degree

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from Newcastle University, Elizabeth heeded her father’s words to take responsibility and ‘blagged’ her way onto the derivatives desk at Goldman Sachs, and from a job with this leading investment bank her career took off. She moved into headhunting and says, “This is where I really found myself. I was working at a senior level, understanding complex products but more importantly working out who people were and where they would fit, and I loved it.”

She forged a long and successful career in high level search as Head of Global Financial Services Practice at Heidrick & Struggles and in 2002 founded her own firm, Hammond Partners, which her husband, Paul, now runs.

Alongside this successful company, she established 6

TXG Ltd, a leading provider of corporate coaching and worked with an impressive list of female business leaders for the Princes Trust Leadership Group. She freely admits, “I was a workaholic and hugely successful. I went back to work three weeks after the birth of my daughter and, looking back, I don’t think I’d do anything different.”

These days Elizabeth adopts a healthier work/home balance but is no less impressive, adapting her corporate skills for her personal 1:1 coaching, seeing clients in London and in Oxshott. “I usually see people when they are in a period of transition, moving from one role to another or starting a new business.

But it’s not just executives who are looking to develop new skills and management techniques, it is often men

spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

and women transitioning into retirement or women who would like to go back to work after the kids have left. The first thing I’d say of the last group is that they’ve been working throughout this period: they’ve probably raised children, run houses, and managed the whole family. They’re doing a lot but they’re not fulfilled and lost track of who they are.”

But be warned, you have to do your homework. “The starting point is keeping a diary where you mark down when you feel good, feel bad, and feeling in the flow. We work out a map of who you are: What are your true values? How would people describe you and what is your story? I show you the map and how to change. Life evaluation and transformation work sit at shop local

inspiring woman

the core of what I do and it requires a level of honesty and hard work.” We should all try coaching: it sounds fun.

Fun and a whole lot of hard work goes into Elizabeth’s other major occupation: the hugely successful ‘Action for Children’ fundraising lunch at the Jumeirah Carlton Tower in London.

It’s quite simply the ultimate ladies’ lunch and features a fashion show sponsored

by Harvey Nichols. Tickets for the yearly event sell out within days and Elizabeth, along with her committee, is responsible for every aspect of the event. “It’s equivalent to having a full-time job but is a marvellous opportunity to shine a light on the work of Action for Children, the charity founded on the belief that every child should have the opportunity to get a head shop local

start in life regardless of their backgrounds.”

First impressions really can be deceiving. Elizabeth looks like someone who attends charity lunches rather than gets stuck in and organises them. Like her father, she’s a grafter and she has undergone personal

challenges in her life and it is these characteristics, just as much as her 16 years in the city, that have made her the inspiring woman she is today.

For information on Life & Executive Coaching contact elizabeth-hammond.co.uk

Elizabeth with Prince Charles

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Where children become everything they can be Singing, dancing and acting classes for 4 - 18 year-olds COBHAM 0203 723 9702 stagecoach.co.uk/cobham

HINCHLEY WOOD 01372 238238 stagecoach.co.uk/hinchleywood

WEYBRIDGE 0808 208 5134 stagecoach.co.uk/weybridge Stagecoach Performing Arts is the trading name of Stagecoach Theatre Arts Limited. Stagecoach Theatre Arts schools are operated under franchise and are independently owned by their Principals. Stagecoach and Creative Courage For Life are registered trademarks of Stagecoach Theatre Arts Limited.

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NARS Lipstick, Breaking Free, £21

Pretty as a Peach

Crushing on corals & new nudes, we’re as pretty as a peach this spring; personal stylist Charlotte Broadbent tells us to add bows, headgear & pattern to our wardrobe now, now, now!

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Navy Ri Monogram High Neck, £32 Riverisland.com Beige Monogram Cross Body Bag, £25 Riverisland.com Beige Monogram Lock Front Belted Bum Bag, £26 Riverisland.com

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Beige Monogram Cross Body Bag, £25 Riverisland.com

charlotteloves.co.uk E: charlotte@charlotteloves.co.uk T: 07946 615357 Follow her on insta ._charlotteloves_ twitter charlotteloves_ 1 hour personal shopping session; £150 includes mini colour consultation, body shape analysis and shopping. T&C’s apply

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Cobham

In 1086 the Domesday Book listed the assets of the little town of Covenham, held then by Chertsey Abbey, as “12½ hides; 3 mills worth 13s 4d, 10 ploughs, 1 alike unit of meadow, woodland worth 40 hogs”. A millennium later you’ll find the assets of Covenham, now modern-day Cobham,

Adaptations - Kitchens for Living

Adaptations has been designing and installing high quality, bespoke and German kitchens in South West London and Surrey for twenty years.

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CORE

“I felt the difference after one session”, “I used muscles I didn’t know I had”, “The next day I woke up with no back pain for the first time in years”.

These are just some of the comments from clients at CORE! Based in the heart of Cobham Village these fast-paced, Pilates reformer classes offer a fantastic range of intense, core strengthening workouts.

Helping you to feel stronger, leaner and more flexible than you’ve felt in years. With the addition of a circuit Pilates class you’re guaranteed to feel like you’ve worked every muscle in your body!

44 High Street, Cobham KT11 3EB | allaboutthecore.co.uk

The Cobham Bookshop

There has been a bookshop on our site for over 30 years and as a thriving independent bookshop, we offer the best new books for all ages. Personal service is at the heart of the shop, with staff recommendations to help you find books you’ll love, gift books, school reading lists and book club choices. Next-day delivery is often available for customer orders. Open 7 days a week.

12A Anyards Road, Cobham KT11 2JZ | cobhambooks.com

Evie Loves Toast

Evie loves Toast is an outstanding award winning independent boutique established in 2010. This is the go-to shop for exciting, original clothing, jewellery, accessories, cards and gifts. Since opening, this family run business has gone from strength to strength, enjoying a new prime location next to Waitrose. Brimming with wonderful gift ideas, you cannot fail to find something for the friend who has everything, or a treat for yourself!

1 Oakdene Parade, Cobham KT11 2LP | evielovestoast.com

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just as charming but a little less rustic. The High Street is a magnet for shoppers and socialites from far and wide and boasts some of the most glamourous restaurants, cafés, celebrity fitness establishments and beautiful independent shops

in green and leafy Surrey. It even has its own landscaped 18th-century park and a mill on the babbling river Mole in the heart of the village.

One could describe it as idyllic and perfect for that leisurely shopping experience.

Phoenix Style

Are you ready for a wardrobe DETOX? Then join the ever-growing number of savvy people who are streamlining their wardrobes by selling their luxury designer labels at Phoenix.

Leading the way in designer consignment for over 40 years, they can sell any of your unwanted designer items. Call 01932 862147 to arrange collection or visit them in store.

5 Church St, Cobham KT11 3EG | phoenixstyle.co.uk

Pip & Gray and Curtain Call

Pip & Gray boutique and gift shop as well as Curtain Call. The Curtain Agency which is situated in the garden showroom, sells a beautiful selection of ‘as new’ pre loved designer fabric, discounted high quality curtains. The gift shop has a stunning new extension and now sell woman’s clothes, jewellery, fashion accessories, homeware, cards and gifts which are unique and have been lovingly sourced by Interior Designer and owner Alicia Gray. The shop is dog friendly too!

3 Church Street, Cobham KT11 3EG | curtaincallcobham@hotmail.com | pipandgray.co.uk

Jeremy Hobbs - Fine Menswear

A friendly independent men’s clothes shop and formal outfit hire service. We have been trading for over 30 years and specialise in top quality casual clothing including labels such as Gant, Tommy Hilfiger, Hackett, Claudio Lugli, Olymp, Hunt & Holditch, Robert Charles, Paolo Vandini and Lacuzzo and also stock a large choice of shoes, ties, cufflinks, belts, wallets, caps, socks, underwear, bags, towels, and more.

3 Oakdene Parade, Cobham KT11 2LR | jeremyhobbs.co.uk

Number Six

An independent women’s fashion boutique situated in the heart of Cobham, Surrey. The collections are a fresh, eclectic and unique edit of designs from around the world. We offer a personalised service which offers you an individual look that will last across seasons and years.

Brands featured include Odd Molly, Twin Set, ChloBo, Kobi Halperin, Ottod’Ame and many more.

Whether it is for everyday or that special occasion you can count on Number Six.

6 Anyards Rd, Cobham KT11 2JZ | numbersixcobham.co.uk

Pole Structural Engineers Designing structures for alterations, extensions and new houses Local, friendly and professional

Admel House 24 High Street Wimbledon Village SW19 5DX T: 020 8944 9955 E: mail@pole.co.uk

pole.co.uk

Specialists in Audio, Cinema & Smarthome

O’Brien Hi-Fi Est. 1966

020 8946 1528 www.obrienhiďŹ .com

Cobham Sunstyle UK

Citing the casual glamour that defines Cobham as a strong motivating factor, Sunstyle UK have created a unique Beauty & Tanning salon. A one stop shop with friendly, specialised staff that can cater to all your beauty & tanning needs. Our therapists are known as some of the best in the industry ensuring treatments are of the utmost quality.

24 Anyards Road, Cobham KT11 2LA | sunstyleuk.com

The Juice Smith

An imaginative Vegan Café. Offering breakfast, brunch & lunch options, a variety of healthy cold-pressed juices, snacks, sweet treats and organic coffee. They pride themselves on the highest standard of creative vegan cooking, made in house, using fresh healthy produce on a daily basis, delivering tasty, natural and healthy food. Free from additives, preservatives and refined sugar. There’s something for everyone and they’re dog friendly too!

23 Oakdene Parade, Cobham KT11 2LR | thejuicesmith.com

Feltonfleet Preparatory School

Feltonfleet is a community ‘where individuals really matter’ - a core belief which shapes all they say and do. Set in 25 acres of landscaped grounds on the outskirts of Cobham, Surrey, this co-ed day and flexi-boarding school for three to 13 year olds has recently announced exciting development plans.

Find out more on their website below

Byfleet Road, Cobham KT11 1DR | feltonfleet.co.uk

Reed’s School

Set in 40 acres Reed’s is an independent secondary school that offers huge advantages to all pupils, both day and boarding, along with outstanding pastoral support. The values-driven education equips pupils with excellent academic qualifications along with the interpersonal skills they will need for the future, and ensures they possess a strong moral compass and a desire to go into the world and improve it.

Sandy Lane, Cobham KT11 2ES | reeds.surrey.sch.uk

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AND THEY’RE OFF!

Juliet Slot speaks to Holly Candlish about the history of Royal Ascot, dressing to impress and how to curtsy when you meet HRH The Queen

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oyal Ascot is one of the world’s most renowned race meetings, known as much for its extravagant hats, glamour and tradition as it is for horse racing. For many, it is the centrepiece of ‘the season’ offering an opportunity to dress up, meet with friends, see and be seen. Royal Ascot is Britain’s most valuable race meeting, attracting many of the world’s finest racehorses to compete for millions of pounds in prize money (£7.3m in 2018). Over the course of the five-day event the racecourse welcomes more than 300,000 visitors and at the heart of the

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Ascot buzz is Chief Commercial Officer, Juliet Slot. Juliet has an impressive career in sports marketing with senior roles at Fulham Football Club, Haymarket Press and worked on the successful Olympic bid team for London 2012, which she describes as a career highlight. She lives in Barnes with her rugby correspondent husband, Owen Slot, and their three children.

Juliet, you have one of the most important jobs at one of the most important events in the social calendar. What are you responsible for at Ascot?

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by an Act of Parliament in 1913 and Ascot is now overseen on behalf of the Crown by Her Majesty’s Representative, Johnny Weatherby, appointed by the Queen and supported by two other Trustees who report to her. We take our responsibility to the monarch and the direction in our constitution to deliver ‘racing for the people’ very seriously.

Her Majesty the Queen, along with members of the Royal family have attended Ascot every year since she acceded to the throne. Each year, as a Director, you have the honour to be presented in an official line up: how does that make you feel?

Ultimately, I ensure that we deliver the brand experience across the venue. That means I’m in charge of all the media rights, tickets, hospitality, sponsorship, retailing and licensing at Ascot - marketing and consumer communications also comes under my umbrella.

Royal Ascot is a hugely prestigious event. What is the history of the royal association?

The Royal meeting was established in 1711

by Queen Anne and since that day racing has been held at Ascot. A trust was established

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At two o’clock on the first day of the Royal Meeting, the Golden Gates open and the Royal Procession starts. As I watch Her Majesty the Queen and the four Landau carriages glide up the racecourse, with the throngs of racegoers cheering by the side of the course, the hairs on my neck always tingle. It’s at that moment I am proudest. The Queen loves this meeting and we want to make it the best it can be for her. The first year, I had no idea I would be presented and that I would have to learn to curtsy; which is more than a simple bob. The CEO, who was male, ended up having to show me how it was done and I’m aware of his eyes, along with my Mum, watching me every year. (The trick is to put your leg back further and go deeper than you think.)

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Greeting The Queen

Ascot gets bigger and better every year. What can we expect in 2019?

I want you to walk away thinking Ascot was better than ever, but you won’t necessarily be able to put your finger on it: it may be that we have improved the walkways, put different types of planting, different decorations or added more furniture. New for 2019, we have bought in celebrity chefs Raymond Blanc, Phil Howard and Ollie Debbous to our restaurants and introduced afternoon tea by Eric Lanier. The Village Enclosure is doubling in size and is Ascot’s take on a festival with lots of music.

Sports marketing is traditionally maledominated. What advice would you give to women in the work place?

from years before. Of course, I go to Becky saying I’ll only buy one new outfit and I come out with two or three - it’s definitely a perk of the job. The ladies who work at Ascot borrow and share hats, but we also need bags, shoes, tights and jewellery. I generally wear nude shoes, like the Duchess of Cambridge, but not as high as hers. Finally, I send photos of the outfits to a good friend, Claudia Bradby, and she lends me jewellery - and then I feel dressed.

Any racing tips?

I wouldn’t bet against Stradivarius in the Gold Cup. Royal Ascot: Tuesday 18th to Saturday 22nd June.

You can’t have it all. In my experience, you have to be prepared to make compromises. Bringing up children, you may have to pull back on your work or have proper childcare. Don’t feel you have to apologise for either route. Women’s rights are very strongly protected in the workplace therefore my advice is to stay working and get support and help. Don’t allow the fact that you have children stop you from promoting yourself.

For race-goers and television audiences, fashion is very much a part of the Ascot experience. You attend each day of Royal Ascot in something amazing; what’s your secret?

Becky Patsianas, in personal shopping at Bentalls, is my go-to person. I need five entirely different outfits and she keeps a record of everything I wear and ensures I reuse pieces

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Juliet and Clare Balding

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DAVID LLOYD CLUB NEWS A Healthier Tomorrow Getting our kids into good habits

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healthier tomorrow is normally a statement that has negative connotations.

It implies that you have fallen off the diet wagon, given in to your favourite treat or are putting off doing something challenging today and waiting 24 hours to start again. However, for us, there is a far deeper meaning which will have a profound impact on not only tomorrow, but all the tomorrow’s after that.

As a nation we are struggling with rising rates of obesity, increasing sedentary rates and many health issues as a direct result. The question is how can we change and reverse this cycle? The

answer is clear. Educate our children on how to enjoy exercise, eat healthily and create their early social circles within environments within these surroundings.

At Brooklands we offer activities for children of all ages. From swimming to Karate, family gym sessions, crèche, make & create, mini dance and so much more. Together we can start creating a healthier tomorrow today.

Call 01932 827900 or visit davidlloyd.co.uk/brooklands

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GALE’S STORY “Strength training and new habits can help reduce your biological age no matter how old you are” says Vessy Zlatareva

Gale: I was diagnosed with osteopenia about 12 years ago, when I was 53. I had no idea of the meaning and implications of the condition. I was merely told that I should exercise more. Shortly after my diagnosis I discovered a dance called Leroc, also known as modern jive, and I loved it. I had never enjoyed the gym, nor did I ever exercise consistently in my life, so finding something I enjoyed was a real revelation. I danced with gay abandon and forgot all about my apparent condition.

However, in 2011 I was diagnosed with osteoporosis, almost by chance. I recall my GP saying, “Don’t worry we can reverse this. A good diet, exercise and a bisphosphonate medication (which may have side effects) will do it.”

The medication side effects were very uncomfortable. I

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recall feeling a mixture of hope and also so much fear, particularly of my bones breaking. As a dancer, I froze. I was nervous about moving with the freedom I had felt before.

The drugs began to take their toll on my general health. I knew I had to find a better way to beat feeling so incapacitated by this invisible disease.

I began to research different ways of doing that and discovered that there was an exercise machine in the USA that had the promise of reversing osteoporosis. After lots of detective work in this country, I found a machine to use. But more importantly I found Vessy and her “Simply Strong for Life” Program.

The regular workouts with Vessy have changed my life in so many ways, for which I am unbelievably grateful.

Vessy Zlatareva

It’s been amazing. The machine diagnostics show me that there has been a 280% increase in my strength since I began. I am also feeling more-sure footed and my balance has improved hugely. The fear of future of living with brittle bones has hugely diminished and I am more confident in my body.

Needless to say, I am back to dancing with the freedom my dance deserves. bonelifeclinic.com info@bonelifeclinic.com 07970 133992 316 High Street, Dorking RH4 1QX

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OPEN MORNINGS

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Means-tested bursaries are available.

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spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

Call: 01372 462627 Email: school.registrar@ rowanprepschool.co.uk Register online: rowanprepschool.co.uk

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Access to quality education is still a pipe dream for many South Africans. A dismal 50% of the children that begin school in Reception successfully make it through to Sixth Form.

Now meet Miche. She fell pregnant while she was repeating Grade 8, and when her baby girl arrived the day before her 16th birthday it seemed as if her last hopes of completing her education were gone. After two years of staying home to care for her daughter, her grandmother, knowing how difficult it would be to find reliable work with only a Grade 8, encouraged Miche to get back into school. Planning for a future for herself and her child would be challenging if Miche

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didn’t make a change, but what kind of school was going to accept an 18-year-old GCSE student?

Fortunately, she soon discovered the School of Hope, one of the flagship projects funded by the Thembalitsha Foundation with the help of Thembalitsha UK. In 2018 Miche graduated from the School of Hope at the top of her class with a Bachelor Pass and two distinctions!

What’s next for Miche? She hopes to study Foundation Phase teaching, should her financial situation allow it, all the while raising her daughter.

Her journey as a young mother has been one filled with trials and tribulations, but Miche has

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REAL CRIME NEEDS REAL POLICE Sophie Khan, Solicitor-Advocate states her case

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n November 2017, the London Mayor announced a decision to close 37 of the 73 police stations across London.

The decision followed a consultation launched on 14 July 2017 by the Mayor’s Office for Policing and Crime on a Draft Public Access and Engagement Strategy (PAES) for London. The Mayor’s decision was judicially reviewed by Professor Paul Kohler, who had in 2014 been the victim of a violent attack in his home in Wimbledon.

On 20 July 2018, the High Court found that the Deputy Mayor had “failed to ensure that there was consideration of a material matter raised in the consultation responses relating to Merton.” The material matter which had been ignored was “the need to test whether the new technology would reduce the amount of time officers needed to spend in the community.”

The shift away from traditional policing methods to digital policing has already been explored by other police forces to include Kent Police.

In 2013, Kent Police started to use the PredPol programme, a predictive policing algorithm which claimed that on a daily basis it can identify 180 crime hotspots, each 500ft by 500ft.

Unsurprisingly, Kent Police has decided not to renew the £100,000 per year contract and in

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November 2018 launched “a new policy model that places victims and witnesses at its centre…” after evaluating “alternative options which will support a focus on both traditional and emerging crime types”.

The unpredictability of the “new technology” has also been experienced by the Metropolitan Police in its trialling of Live Facial Recognition.

The NEC’s NeoFace Technology, is said to identify a person from a digital image, held on a system database which contains the “watch list”, but there has been an almost 100 per cent misidentification rate. It has cost the Metropolitan Police £198,000 for the software and £23,000 on hardware, such as cameras.

It is uncertain what impact the closure of the police stations will have in the future, but what is clear is that the experiment with digital policing has failed. It is difficult to see how the Mayor can remain of the view that “new technology”, can bring about savings to the police fund and safety to Londoners at the same time.

If you wish to seek legal advice on whether you have a human rights claim against the police or a detention claim, if you have been arrested, contact Sophie Khan & Co, Solicitors and Higher Court Advocates on 07702 999 638. enquiries@sophiekhan.co.uk sophiekhan.co.uk

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

23

care home promo

Moore Place Proud to Care

M

oore Place care home, operated by Anchor, is a contemporary residential care home set in luxurious and comfortable surroundings in Esher, Surrey. Meticulously finished to a very high standard, Moore Place offers first class care and facilities. En-suite rooms are available for up to 60 residents, in an atmosphere of light, spacious and elegant surroundings.

Moore Place provides high quality dementia care and support for residents living with dementia by treating them as individuals. All of the carers are trained and supported by a dedicated dementia team to ensure residents feel valued and able to live life to the full. Ever ready to support family and friends via access to information and advice, our approach respects the uniqueness of each person rather than focusing on the diagnosis of dementia.

Anchor was named ‘Residential Care Provider of the Year’ at the prestigious Health Investor Awards and celebrated its 50th Anniversary in 2018. It operates on a not-for-profit basis, which enables reinvestment in its care homes.

For further information, please call Moore Place care home on 01372 478200 or come in and see us at Portsmouth Road, Esher, Surrey, KT10 9LH

Live life tostagecoach the full provided

From the moment you step into Moore Place, you will feel at home. Our beautiful contemporary care home is finished to a high standard and it is set in luxurious landscaped gardens. We offer personally tailored care, specialist dementia care and short breaks.

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Moore Place care home Esher, KT10 9LH Please call 0808 102 5530 or visit Moore-Place.org.uk

Rated September 2017

Good

mental health

couch with Dr De-Stress On the

Dr Mariette Jansen

It must be love, love, love… What else could it be? sking questions that make you think is an important part of my job. It is so easy to mix up love with something else. How would you answer this love and relationship quiz?

A

I work really hard and it’s lovely that she doesn’t want me to do anything in the house.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is he just selfish and is she a martyr?

I am always looking to please him.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it insecurity and fear of losing him?

He always takes over when I am upset.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is he a rescuer, making me a victim?

I don’t know how she does it, but things always go her way.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it skilful manipulation?

She continuously checks on my health, giving me supplements and sending me to the gym.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it smothering?

We give each other space to pursue our own dreams.

It must be love, love, love.

Or are we being selfish?

I do everything to accommodate him.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it low self-esteem?

He knows so much and he always gives me the right advice.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is he domineering?

She texts me at least three times a day to tell me she loves me.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it covering insecurity?

She always criticises me so I do more and try my best.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it fear for rejection?

He can really put me down, but when he apologises I immediately forgive him.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it fear of confrontation?

I make the decisions for my partner all the time.

It must be love, love, love.

Or is it overstepping boundaries?

Just a few questions to make you think.

About others, yourself and your relationships.

To receive the full list of questions and relationship tips, text Darling and your email to 07967 717 131.

Dr Mariette Jansen, Dr De-Stress is a lifecoach, meditation teacher, EFT therapist, blogger, award winning and expert in helping women to take control of their lives, overcome anxiety and build confidence. drdestress.co.uk | mariette@drdestress.co.uk shop local

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 19 2019

21 25

Breck’s Last Game The tragedy that’s inspiring change. Holly Candlish speaks to Lorin LaFave, Breck’s mother

Breck Brednar, aged 14, was killed by an online predator. The murder happened five years ago, but with police estimates of over 100,000 online predators in the UK, it’s not a story that’s going away. Holly Candlish met with Breck’s mother, Lorin LaFave, to talk about the Breck Foundation, an organisation promoting safer web use.

“There are times when I want to run into a cave and never tell this story again,” says Lorin LeFave, dignified and admirably calm as she relates the harrowing tale of her son, Breck.

“I was devastated when my father died, but I wasn’t responsible for him. On the other hand, I was responsible for Breck. That’s our ultimate goal as a parent - to protect our children - and I can’t forgive myself for failing.”

In February 2014, Lorin’s 14-yr-old son, Breck, from Caterham Surrey, was groomed and brutally murdered by Lewis Daynes. 18-yrold Daynes ran a gaming server where he 26

spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

shop local

befriended boys and dazzled them with stories of his computer expertise and international travel, claiming to run a tech company. After gaining Breck’s trust by chatting to him for an extended period, he began telling him a series of lies, turning him against family and friends.

Daynes then lured Breck to his flat, saying he wanted to give him a job at his fictitious company, which he claimed could earn the schoolboy millions of pounds. When Breck arrived, Daynes sexually assaulted him and killed him. Lorin was devastated, especially as she had previously flagged her concerns to the police, his school and other parents of the gaming group.

“The local police failed to pass on my suspicions to the relevant police department - which had an existing file on Daynes; the school didn’t have an appreciation of the growth of internet grooming; and when a group of parents blocked our children from using the gaming forum, Breck’s killer circumnavigated the ban by sending him an expensive phone as a present.”

As the background of the story came out during the police investigation, the overwhelming lack of awareness motivated Lorin to set up a charity. “Two weeks after Breck was killed I sat my three children down in the living room and said I had to have something good come out of this: because Breck was innately good. Inspired by Breck, I set up a charity devoted to warning children about the dangers of grooming, and persuading them to be the person who reports it to someone when they see it.” Since then, she has worked tirelessly to achieve that goal.

So what are the warning signs and what action should we take? Lorin says ”I believe every child will be contacted online by someone who would cause them harm. The starting point is to educate ourselves about what exploitation, manipulation and grooming looks like. Watch out for pulling away, and personality changes.

Also, being isolated from their friends - if it doesn’t seem right, it probably isn’t. Breck was being given presents, isolated by the predator, taken to another game and started to view the online friend as his only friend.

If you think there’s manipulation or control relating to online activity, go and talk formally shop local

to someone trained in safeguarding at school so there’s a record. The school can start to build a picture and then take it to CEOP, the child exploitation arm of the national crime agency with access to criminal records. Report and re-report and if you’re not happy, contact CEOP direct. Police say that 90% of the time if a parent has got to the stage of reporting something, then there’s something to it.”

The foundation has exceeded her expectations and Lorin travels the UK training police, educators, health practitioners, parents and school children. She has been recognised by the Suzy Lamplugh Trust and advises the NSPCC and Downing Street. The extent of her success is borne out by the changing attitudes of schools and police. Both institutions have embraced Lorin’s crusade, so much so that four major police forces have funded a video, Breck’s Last Game, which is now available to schools alongside well-crafted lesson plans.

“Just as we teach children how to cross the road, not to talk to strangers in the street, we need to understand that everyone online is a stranger. Breck never got those messages, never heard words like exploitation and predator, they didn’t use that terminology.” darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

27

BRECK’S PRINCIPLES

Be aware Opening files from

people you don’t know can lead to problems

Five years later, something good has come out of her son’s death, with more young people aware of online dangers. Lorin is also slowly recovering. “The hurt will never go away, and I think about Breck daily. But there is a fundraising ball to organise, a play of Breck’s life to produce and this year I’ve been able to celebrate the holidays, because my three children don’t deserve to see me sad their whole lives.”

To enquire about the fundraising ball, or to get a copy of the video and lesson plans contact: admin@breckfoundation.org

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spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

Report it Tell a trusted parent if

something is making you or a friend uncomfortable

Educate Someone might lie about who they are online

Communicate Online friends are strangers. Never meet up with them alone Keep Safe Don’t give out personal information

Hampton Court Palace Festival 2019

header

Historic Royal Palaces and IMG are delighted to announce the line-up

P

erforming are princess of pop Kylie Minogue on 20 and 21 June, the iconic Nile Rodgers & Chic on 14 and 15 June, Dutch songstress Caro Emerald on 12 June, music virtuoso Jools Holland on 6 June, new-wave legends Tears For Fears on 18 and 19 June and pop royalty The Jacksons on 7 June.

General admission and VIP tickets for these concerts are on sale now, except general admission tickets for both of Kylie Minogue’s shows and Nile Rodgers & Chic’s show on 14 June as they are now sold out.

Artists will perform in a 3,000-seat auditorium in the stunning Tudor courtyard Base Court, of Henry VIII’s magnificent palace. Attendees can enjoy a Fortnum & Mason picnic hamper in the Palace Gardens before each night’s concert, or perhaps enjoy an unforgettable VIP package by eating a three-course dinner plus a selection of fine wines fit for royalty before seating in premium positions for the main music event. hamptoncourtpalacefestival.com

Don’t massage it, reset it From tennis elbows to frozen shoulders, NRT is a fast and easy way of getting rid of muscular pain and tightness Andy Clark of the new NRT Therapy in Surrey explains

N

euro Reset Technique is a pioneering physical therapy that instantly restores and optimises muscle and joint function, transforms movement, posture, mobility and physical performance.

By strengthening the electrochemical signals sent from the body to the brain, NRT resets the nervous system to release a muscle from excess tension. With the release, the knots, pain, and tightness are gone. Joint mobility and posture are improved.

Whether you need to recover from an injury, require help with a painful condition, or you want to improve your physical performance NRT can do this and offers long term, demonstrable changes.

Because of its unique mode of action, NRT can help with osteo-arthritis, headaches, balance,

shop local

posture correction, chronic pain, carpal tunnel, breathing difficulties and much more.

Alex Brockman, exprofessional cricketer, is just one of the many clients we have helped with NRT: “My body was riddled with injuries, some of which I had been feeling for over 20 years.

After six NRT sessions the results are truly amazing.”

Contact Andy Clark 07904 367419

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

29

the

Tipping Point Redressing the gender balance - that’s the idea behind #BalanceforBetter, the 2019 International Women’s Day theme for women around the world

T

he economic and social benefits of a fair gender balance are well documented. Women’s issues are grabbing the headlines with the #MeToo and

Jude Kelly, Founder of WOW

Gina Miller Photo Emma Freeman

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Naomi Klein

spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

Time’s Up movements, but everyone from school children to world leaders need to play their part if we hope to make the world a better place for us all.

Catherine Mayer

Jo Brand

Sandi-Toksvig

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Women’s rights rights –– Darling Darlingexclusive exclusive Women’s We have We havereached reacheda acrucial crucialmoment momentin inhistory. history.

InIn every everysphere sphereofoflife, life,there therehas hasnever neverbeen been a more a moreurgent urgentneed needtotohelp helpforge forgeaamore more gender-balanced gender-balancedworld. world.Women Womenhave havecome come a long way, yet there’s still more a long way, yet there’s still more toto bebeachieved. achieved.Feminism Feminismhas has evolved too and we evolved too and weare areininthe the fourth fourthwave waveofoffeminism, feminism,also also called modern day called modern dayfeminism, feminism, according accordingtotoleading leadingscholars scholarsinin the subject.

The focus the subject. The focusisisnow nowon on combatting sexual harassment combatting sexual harassmentand and violence violenceagainst againstwomen womenasaswell well establishingequal equaleducational educational asas establishing and professionalopportunities opportunitiesfor for and professional womeneverywhere. everywhere. women

launched

by Jude Jude Kelly Kellyand andhas hassince since launched in 2010 by spread worldwide.

It attracts activists, experts, spread It attracts activists, experts, artists audiences from from all allover overthe theworld world artists and audiences and from all walks of life.

Real change follows and of life. Real change follows after its its groundbreaking groundbreakingdebates, debates, such as as the the founding foundingof ofthe the Women’s Equality EqualityParty Partyby bySandi Sandi Women’s Toksvig and Catherine Mayer the Toksvig and Catherine Mayer atatthe WOW London London Festival Festivalin in2015.

2015.

In In every every sphere sphere of life, life, there there has has never been been aa more more urgent need need toto help help forge aa more more gendergenderbalanced world. world. balanced Women have have come Women long way, way, yet aa long there’s still still more there’s be achieved. achieved. toto be

InternationalWomen’s Women’sDay Dayisis International celebratedannually annuallyon onMarch March88 celebrated but theglobal globalcampaign campaigntheme theme but the continuesallallyear yeartotoencourage encourage continues actionand anddiscussion. discussion.March Marchisisalso also action Women’sHistory HistoryMonth.

Month.ItItwas wasfirst firstintroduced introduced Women’s 1978ininCalifornia Californiaand andmade madeofficial officialin in1987 1987 inin 1978 theUS USCongress.

Congress.Many Manyamazing amazingevents events byby the take placethroughout throughoutMarch, March,such suchasasWOW WOW take place - Womenofofthe theWorld WorldFestival Festivalon on8-9 8-9March March - Women London’sSouthbank SouthbankCentre.

Centre.WOW WOWwas was inin London’s

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Out of of frustration frustrationFrances FrancesScott Scott founded the 50:50 Parliament founded the 50:50 Parliament 2013 and and #AskHerToStand #AskHerToStand in 2013 campaign campaign in in 2016 2016to toachieve achieve 50:50 Parliamentary Parliamentaryrepresentation, representation, an inclusive inclusive gender-balanced gender-balancedparparliament, liament, that that draws drawsupon uponthe thewidest widest possible possible pools pools of of talent, talent,in-cluding in-cluding men and and women women equally. equally.We Westill still have a long long way way to togo gowith withaarecord record 208 women women MPs MPs elected electedatatGeneral General Election Election in in 2017, 2017, aarecord recordhigh highofof 32%. As of January 32%.

January 2018, 2018, there thereare are206 206female female peers, making up 26% peers, 26% of of Members Membersof ofthe the House of Lords. In House In this this day day and andage, age,that’s that’sjust just not good enough! not 5050parliament.co.uk 5050parliament.co.uk

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

31

Spring Fever with Bridge Guru Paul Mendelson The Surrey Schools Championships filled the Roehampton Club this spring with a hundred bridge players under the age of eighteen, all enthused to compete and enjoy this wonderful game. KCS Wimbledon took home the garlands. Although some were less experienced, many declarers proved that they had their wits about them…

♠ West S 2 H 7654 D KJ74 C KQJ5

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Dealer South N/S Game N E S W 1C NB 1S NB 1NT NB 4S North’s 1C was artificial and his 1NT rebid showed 12-14pts. South ambitiously, but correctly, jumped to game. West led K♣ and declarer realised that he faced four losers: a club, two diamonds and the ace of trumps. South won with dummy’s A♣ and then made the key plays: he played 10♥ to his Q♥, then 9♥ back to dummy’s A♥. Next, he laid down K♥ and discarded 9♣ from his hand. Then, and only then, was it safe to draw trumps.

Even for experienced players, the temptation to play too quickly at trick 1 can be overwhelming, yet this is the time when both declarer and defenders must take their time, analyzing the dummy, the lead, recalling the bidding and forming some kind of basic plan to make or break the contract. aceoftrumps.com

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darli exclu ng sive

Inside Reed’s School with Mark Hoskins, Headmaster at Reed’s School in Cobham

Mark Hoskins has been Headmaster at Reed’s School since 2014. An independent school for boys from 11 to 18 and girls from 16 to 18, it prides itself on providing exceptional pastoral care along with the inspiration and motivation to exceed academically. Founded as a school for orphans in 1813 by Andrew Reed, to this day, around 10% of the 700 pupils are from families where the pupil has lost the support of one or both parents.

• What do you consider to be the essence of Reed’s?

It’s the community - the central mission of our Foundation inspires everyone in the Reed’s community, from staff to parents to pupils to alumni and, in so doing, creates a genuinely warm and nurturing school which is a privilege to be a part of.

• What is the Reed’s ethos and how do you prepare pupils for life after education?

Our ethos is simple: to produce happy children through an environment that promotes their self-confidence and self-esteem. Through superb teachers, excellent facilities and the countless opportunities on offer at Reed’s, we realise not only the academic potential of our pupils, but also develop their character. I feel that this is what ultimately prepares them for the future.

• What is the best part of your job?

The best part of my job is speaking with the pupils, watching their progress and sharing, in a small way, in their challenges and achievements. I am exceptionally proud of the fact that they are wellrounded, compassionate, and personable. I find constant inspiration by what I learn from them, and how they support one another.

• What would you change about the current education system?

I would like to dismantle it and start again! It’s baffling that debate around the future of education misses the fundamental point; that we have a system predicated on failing a large proportion of our children. Many leave school knowing only what they ‘can’t do’ . This is scandalous and a huge loss in human potential. We should have a system that finds out what children can do and rewards them for it. An ideology at the heart of everything we do at Reed’s. reeds.surrey.sch.uk

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darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

33

McALLISTER THOMAS FINE ART Original Paintings & Sculpture McAllister Thomas Fine Art

117 High Street, Godalming, Surrey, GU7 1AQ

2017 - 10 - Half Page - McAllister Thomas.indd 1

Telephone 01483 860591

www.mcallisterthomasfineart.co.uk 25/01/2019 11:10

McAllister Thomas Fine Art

McAllister Thomas helps private and corporate clients nationwide and internationally through this journey, exhibiting only original works and helping realise an individual uniqueness in each and every piece of work acquired.

The gallery also works alongside interior designers to source paintings and sculpture for specific locations and projects. A piece of art can often be the finishing touch that enhances the character of a room.

McAllister Thomas Fine Art has been established since 2007 and is now one of the South East’s leading contemporary independent art galleries. Located in Godalming in the heart of Surrey, the gallery exhibits original works by leading UK and International artists.

An art collection is an expression of self. Finding and acquiring unique works of art is tremendously rewarding whether it is an original painting or a piece of sculpture.

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spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

With our specialist courier service based at London Heathrow you can be assured that every piece of valuable work will be delivered seamlessly and securely to a location of your choice.

The gallery offers a yearly calendar of group and solo exhibitions.

To join the gallery mailing list please visit the website at mcallisterthomasfineart.co.uk or call 01483 860591

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Paul Lock

header

Surrey boy made good

By Simon Tarrant

‘I am the obstacle and I am the painter’

T

hames Ditton based artist Paul Lock first picked up a paintbrush in 2012 and hasn’t stopped painting since. However what makes Paul’s story unique is not that he’s your proverbial bad-boy Surrey teenager, more that he’s a brilliantly artistic George Clooney like silver fox.

Although a late starter to the artistic scene his extraordinary painting talent shines through highly stylised artworks – Francis Bacon meets Frank Auerbach – but with the iconic immediacey of pop artist Roy Lichtenstein.

Paul’s subjects are like a roster

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of 20th century legends; from Pablo Picasso, Audrey Hepburn and Muhammad Ali; to Ziggy Stardust, Jimi Hendrix and George Michael. All gazing directly back from the canvas as if still strutting their stuff.

Paul says of his portraits, “I want to convey a likeness but I also want to create a painting.

A painting that recognises the form and essence of the person while containing something of me, the painter. Ironically the obstacle in achieving this is me.

I am the obstacle and I am the painter. It is only when I stand back and observe what has been created without knowing that I created it, that I am in some way satisfied.”

Beyond portraiture Paul works from his Thames side studio to create electrifying, almost luminous abstract landscapes.

Real and imagined scenes that entice the viewer to step into Paul’s technicolour dreams. “I continually strive to balance the freedom of colour and mark making with creating an engaging image. I spend time just observing, in silence. What seem to be mistakes underpin something new and fresh that becomes part of the painting.

There is always a new colour, knife or brush stroke that excites me.”

Engrossed in a world of colour and shape, Paul studies images for hours, his artistic process demonstrating a rollercoaster of excitement, frustration and elation. In art critic Estelle Lovatt’s words, “Paul is a striking artist engaging a balance between mark making, colour and line.”

Last November saw Paul’s debut exhibition ‘You Simply Are’ at the fittingly fashionable NoHo Showrooms in the heart of Fitzrovia. The exhibtion was such a success that Paul is already planning his next exhibition for June this year. paullock-art.com

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

35

onthescene

Darling Socials

IVY COBHAM HOSTS ‘WOMEN IN BUSINESS’ LUNCHEON - DARLING FEATURES EDITOR HOLLY CANDLISH WAS THERE

Adrian Fairbank & Janet Nelson

Joer

Lizzie Liebenhals Event Organiser Halls and Halls

Speakers: Sian Marshall (Core Pilates), Joss Dickson (Evie Loves Toast) and Annalie Howling (Incasa)

Jo Hills and Jay Bretherton

Annalie Howling

Surrey ladies enjoying the luncheon

Emily & Gavin Towers

Debbie Barrett, Gemma McLaughlin, Kelly Lindbergh, Judy Bird and Emma Eaton

Elizabeth Hammond

Corinne Sterry, Emma Donald and Lottie Nimmo Claire Grant, Val Lipton, Lucy Manchester and Sue Annesley

Paula Macarthur and Darling’s ‘On the Scene’ Editor, Holly Candlish

Surrey Photographer Juliet Lemon shop local

Sian Marshall, Lucy Jansen and Joss Dickson

Louise Traore, Samantha Taylor-Kwei, Helen Faulkner and Sarah Hall

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2017

37

ESHER & WALTON CONSERVATIVE WOMEN’S ORGANISATION HOSTED DRINKS PARTY WITH RT HON DOMINIC RAAB MP

WHAT'S HOT

WHAT’S HOT COL

Harriet Thorpe

Alex Smith (Founder Harrison’s Fund) & Ant Anstead

Chairman Elise Dünweber, Chris Platt – President of EWCA, Darling’s Holly Candlish and Councillor Ruth Mitchell

CREW CLOTHING, Skinny Jean In Worn Out Mid Wash Blue, £65

EVIE LOVES TOAST, Estella Bartlett Sunburst Gold Necklace, £17.99

SWEATY BETTY, Slogan Crop Vest, tulip red, £45

SPACE NK, Velvet Eau de Parfum, £100

Charly Brennan, Dominic Raab MP & Elise Dünweber Nicki Shields

MINT VELVET, Emma Print Midi Dress, spring forward, £129

Spring Salad at BRONTE'S, Cobham

Helen Peace, Julia Jaconelli and Tommy Dünweber Dominic Raab MP and Neha Dhull - Right 38

spring 2017 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

LadyWimbledon.com @ladywimbledon

#LadyWimbledon shop local

women in business

Soft

POWER

The rise and rise of women’s networking The benefits of women only business groups by Claire Pelenc

F

or many women business owners, the word networking still evokes images of early morning breakfast meetings in a male dominated environment making superficial encounters, exchanging cards with people who are only looking to “sell” and rarely leads to genuine new connections or business. Yet, being a business owner can be lonely, and getting out there is crucial for business growth and success so more and more businesswomen have started to “dip their toes” into the networking pond.

This explains why women-only networking has become a popular way to connect with likeminded entrepreneurs. Thanks to networking groups like The Athena Network, female business owners are finding their tribe, making authentic connections and discovering the power of women supporting women. In fact, we are currently in the middle of a “Networking Explosion” as more and more women are realising that this is, by far, the most effective, supportive and exciting way to grow their business.

As there are different styles of networking to choose from nowadays, The Athena Network offers everything from, informal coffee mornings (Cappuccino Connections) to lunchtime meetings which include monthly minutes, business and networking training, opportunities to build strategic alliances

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partnerships, give and receive referrals, build strong business relationships and have a fun in the process.

There is even a large online community where connections and referrals are made through the power of social media.

Women feel they understand each other and can be themselves in an all-female group. Many are juggling the work/life balance and feel better understood and supported by their networking colleagues with no judgement, as they are in the same boat. It is amazing how confidence can grow when women surround themselves with women supporting each other, cheering them on, being uplifted and inspired and sharing stories of their business building journey together.

The members all have a different profession, so effectively over time, we develop an ‘in-house PR and sales team’ who, once they get to know and understand people’s businesses in the group, are more likely to use each other’s services and happily recommend them to their contacts. It’s well known that people only refer people who they know, like and trust.

To find out more about networking in your local area email claire.pelenc@theathenanetwork.com theathenanetwork.co.uk

darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

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What’s On this spring The Affordable Art Fair

RHS GARDEN WISLEY

Thu 7 - Sun 10 March Battersea Evolution affordableartfair.com

Science Week

Contemporary Art Fair

Spring Community Free Day

Fri 15 - Sun 17 March Sandown Park Racecourse, Portsmouth Rd, Esher contemporaryartfairs.co.uk/surrey-2

Sat 9 - Sun 17 March Tue 19 March rhs.org.uk

DENBIES WINE ESTATE WATTS GALLERY – ARTISTS’ VILLAGE

International Women’s Day Fri 8 March

Christina Rossetti: Vision & Verse Until Sun 17 March

Fire and Earth: The Compton Pottery Until Tue 30 April

Journeys in the Holy Land: Recent Paintings by Alexander Creswell Fri 26 April - Sun 23 June wattsgallery.org.uk

SAOS - Surrey Artists Open Studios 1 - 16 June surreyopenstudios.org.uk GUILDFORD CATHEDRAL

Guildford Choral: Mirror of Perfection Sat 23 March, 7:30pm guildfordchoral.org

Royal Holloway Science Festival Sat 9 March royalholloway.ac.uk/about-us/events/sciencefestival/

Chocolate Fair Sun 7 April

Horse and Carriage Rides Fri 19 April

Wineyard Train Chocolate Trail Sun 21 - Mon 22 April

Rampant Rooster - Morris Dancing Performance Mon 22 April denbies.co.uk THEATRES

Amelia, a play about the enigmatic 1930’s aviator Amelia Earhart 12 April at Godalming’s LynchPin Theatre 16 April at The Electric Theatre, Guildford Tickets on the door or at electric.theatre/events THE BARN THEATRE CLUB, West Molesey

The Real Inspector Hound, by Tom Stoppard Wed 20 - Sat 23 March thebarntheatremolesey.co.uk

THE LEATHERHEAD THEATRE

FAME: Auditions for 9-22 year olds Sun 17 March, 9am

Dance Variations 2019 Thu 21 - Sat 23 March Julie Sianne Theatre Arts 35th Anniversary show

Charlie’s Chocolate Adventure

Sat 6 - Sun 7 April The Rosalle School of Dance show

Treasure Island 40

spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

Fri 12 April theleatherheadtheatre.com

EPSOM PLAYHOUSE

The Story of Me, adapted from Jacqueline Wilson’s Tracy Beaker Thu 7 - Sun 10 March Laine Theatre Arts show

Tinder (The Comedy) Fri 15 March

9 to 5 The Musical

Tue 19 - Sat 23 March

Hot Mikado by Epsom Light Opera Company Tue 9 - Sat 13 April

Coppelia by Vienna Festival Ballet Thu 14 April

The Greatests Hits of Motown How Sweet It Is

Fri 17 May For full listings see epsomplayhouse.co.uk VERA FLETCHER HALL

Title and Deed (show with Fish & Chips supper) Fri 8 March

Her Majesty Fed An Elephant (show with Fish & Chips supper) Sat 30 March

Florence ‘Flo’ Smith - Now and Then Sun 14 April

The Wind in the Willows Sat 27 April

Northanger Abbey

Fri 10 May For full listings visit verafletcherhall.co.uk NEW VICTORIA THEATRE

Dirty Dancing - The Classic Story On Stage Mon 18 - Sat 23 March

Calendar Girls - The Musical Tue 26 - Sat 30 March

Club Tropicana

Mon 1 - Sat 6 April

The Little Mix Experience Wed 10 April

Hormonal Housewives Tue 16 April

Seven Drunken Nights: The Story of the Dubliners Mon 22 April

Matthew Bourne’s Swan Lake Tue 30 April - Sat 4 May

The Guilty Feminist - Live

Sat 1 June For full listings go to atgtickets.com/venues/new-victoria-theatre/ THE THEATRE IN THE WOODS

Don Carlo - Giuseppe Verdi Thu 6 June - Tue 9 July

Porgy & Bess - George Gershwin Sat 8 June - Sun 7 July

Joyce DiDonato

Thu 11 July grangeparkopera.co.uk EASTER HOLIDAY ACTIVITIES

Easter Extravaganza Sat 6 - Mon 23 April

Spring Spectacular

Sat 25 May - Sun 2 June bockettsfarm.co.uk

National Trust Easter Egg Hunt Polesden Lacey

30 March - 15 April, 10am - 3pm

Claremont Landscape Garden KT10 9JG Sat 6 - Mon 22 April, 10.30am - 4pm nationaltrust.org.uk

The Passion of Jesus

High Street, Guildford Town Centre Sat 20 April, 12:00 and at 2:30pm wintershall.org.uk/passion-jesus-guildford PAINSHILL PARK

Celebrating World Book Day Sun 10 March

Mother’s Day Tea in the Walled Garden Sun 31 March

Easter Themed Family Afternoon Tea Fri 19 - Mon 22 April painshill.co.uk

The Surrey Sculpture Society (SSS) 25th Anniversary

Exhibitions at a number of prestigious locations, first event at the Surrey Hills Sculpture Garden and Art Festival Sat 4 May - Sun 2 June surreysculpture.org.uk 41

point of view

Something OLD, Something NEW

By Kate Greenhalgh

S

tep aside! Future mother-of-thebride here - cancel everything, clear the diary, daughter has had a proposal of marriage from an eligible young man. So excited. Where to start?

Obviously, the first thing is to rush out and buy a glossy magazine featuring a dewyeyed bride on the cover. Vital to scour its pages in order to avoid populist cliché. You will not catch me booking a flock of doves dyed in pastel colours for release as the happy couple ascend petalstrewn steps overlooking a lake lit by myriad floating candles reflected on water, while a choir sings a classical cover-version of something

by Coldplay. (Hmm, but how lovely that sounds!)

My first message of congrats was from a veteran Mama of Daughters: ‘So happy with the news! Warn brideto-be it is a NIGHTMARE booking a venue.’ So it has

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proved. Everyone wants edgy weddings these days, not Princess Castles. Very sad. Hipster warehouse in Nunhead - booked out until 2020. Derelict chapel in Peckham - ditto. Condemned bingo hall in Luton - ditto.

And no drinking or music after, like, 10pm, thanks to killjoy Nimbies who have forgotten what it is to be young and wide awake.

Annoyingly, I just moved from a house with a garden big enough for a marquee.

I wish eligible young man had spared a thought for his future mother-in-law, and proposed before I did this. On the other hand, it’s possibly quite good he did not spare a thought for future mother-in-law, as it will be Moi. It’s even rather romantic that he proposed DESPITE future mother-in-law.

Daughter, who seems to think she has any say in any of this, (Bridezilla Syndrome - I was warned about this) wants

spring 2019 | darlingmagazine.co.uk

a wedding which will be ‘inclusive’, by which I take her to mean all her Welsh relatives, half of Wimbledon, and anyone else I can think of. Or she might not mean that. But whatever. And Bridesmaids! I have yet three other daughters - they must not wear puce satin, unfetching to prospective suitors who may be amongst the Welsh guests. So much to think about and worry.

So little time! Oh no, wait, due to lack of venues, far too much time, which is stressful, as danger of OVER planning; and groom getting cold feet, although I can’t think why he would, given his conscious choice of future mother-in law.

But help is at hand. ‘No flowers in jam-jars - so over’ is the advice from one daughter, and my son has offered to organise a stag party in Bangkok for his future brother-in-law.

I’m starting to feel more confident already. shop local

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darlingmagazine.co.uk | spring 2019

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S c h o o l

Details of forthcoming Open Mornings are available on our website www.reeds.surrey.sch.uk “A good education is a fortune a child can never spend” Andrew Reed, who established Reed’s School’s Charitable Foundation 1813

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