Loving Someone with Dementia

By Parveen Singh, Senior Executive Director at Carefield Pleasanton Memory Care

Loving someone with Alzheimer’s, dementia or another form of memory loss can be complex and heartbreaking. As the disease progresses, you may have begun to notice a shift in your loved one’s personality. They may say or do things that are foreign to you and appear to be a different person from whom you once knew.

The beautiful thing about love is that it is an emotion that can be felt. While your loved one may have a hard time recalling your name, you can convey to them that you are someone that they love - and that they are someone that you love.

Here are some tips on how to show someone with memory loss that you love them:

1. Keep them company. Sit with them a little longer. Watch their favorite tv program. Or bring them outside to soak in the sunshine. One of the greatest acts of love is giving someone your time and presence.

2. Connect with them through music. Sing their favorite song to them. You may sound off-key, but a song from someone who loves you makes more of an impact than listening to a recording. Songs can also convey the feeling of love, happiness and tenderness in a way that sentences cannot. Singing your loved one their favorite song can give them comfort if they are confused or angry.

3. Keep them comfortable. Making them a cup of warm tea, giving them a hand massage with lotion, or putting their sweater or socks on for them can show affection beyond words.

4. Practice patience. As memory loss progresses, you may find your patience being tested more frequently with an increase in repetitive behaviors. Practicing patience with your loved one can be a way to express your love for them in the most difficult moments. Remember, your loved one practiced patience with you once.

5. Give yourself grace. Speaking with others who are experiencing the same situation can help you cope. Finding a local caregiver’s support group or connecting with your local Alzheimer’s Association can give you the tools you need to navigate this journey.

Reaching out to your local experts can help as well. The team at Carefield Pleasanton is always available to answer your questions about memory care for your loved one, and the benefits of a community. Contact Carefield Pleasanton by calling (925) 750-8744 or visit www.CarefieldPleasanton.com today.