Best of Penn 2015

&

of

2015

THE DAILY PENNSYLVANIAN | THEDP.COM

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BEST OF PENN

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

OF PENN

11 13 14 15

BESTS 3 5 6 8 9

Best Formal Location Best Place to Throw Up Best Place to Go When Sexiled Best Place to Meet Wharton MBAs Best Place to Nap Best Place to Anti-SAB Best Place to Cry Best Place to Go On an Adventure Best Place to Take Your Mom

Students' Choice 16 17 18 19

Best Food Truck Best Coffeehouse

Best Froyo/Ice Cream Best Campus Addition

Best Instagram Spot Best Place to Get Pampered

Best Delivery Best Brunch

Best Breakfast Sandwich Best Rowdy BYO

Best Use of Bursar Best Tailor/Laundry Service

Best Happy Hour Best Bar

Best On-Campus Housing Best Off-Campus Housing

OF PENN

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

After heated discussions of what makes Penn the best, this is what we, the Street Editors, came up with.

We reccommend that you read this while drinking a gin and tonic from the Rhythm Room lounging atop Amy Gutmann's feather bed.

Pop anthems. Leather couches. Sexy lighting. Lenient bartenders. Big drinks. Private places for a sneaky, fun time.

Was your first thought ‘Are you talking about the Rhythm Room?’ No, it wasn’t.

Was your second thought, ‘What is the Rhythm Room?’ Probably. (It’s the new bar in the Rave Cinema, by the way.)

Was your third thought, ‘Why, dear God, why would anyone go to there?’ Verified yes, it was.

Well, listen the fuck up because the Rhythm Room is the formal hotspot you never knew you needed.

The illustrious Elizabeth Barrett Browning once wrote of the Rhythm Room: How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee more than Copa, Tap or Smokes’ on Tuesday night.

Empty theaters my date and I will breach, when we want to get out of sight.

For the end of being sober, you’re an ideal place.

I love thee to the level Oz groupies love The HeyDaze.

If you asked me if I liked thee to feel ironic, you’d only be half right.

I love thee freely, as drinks are cheap in price.

I might’ve paraphrased that.

Either way, get yourself to the Rhythm Room. Street’s having our formal there—if you’re lucky enough to snag yourself an invite.

P.S. If you decide we suck, you can always Irish exit with your mojito in hand, courtesy of their convenient to–go cups.

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Best Formal Location: The Rhythm Room

Sip. Study.

Repeat.

Study for finals and enjoy exotic coffee blends at Pétrus Ky Café.

BEST OF PENN

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267.969.6196 | petruskycafe.com Chestnut Hall Apts - 3900 Chestnut St.

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Best Place to Go When Sexiled: Your roommate's fuckbuddy's room

Best Place to Meet Wharton MBAs: LinkedIn At Street we pride ourselves on being classy.

That is, being with the Wharton MBA Class of 2016.

And the best way to bask in the elegance of said class is LinkedIn, the Belvedere of social networks. True, the professional benefits of LinkedIn are debatable, but the site’s capacity for networking with a well–endowed Wharton Executive Education hottie is unmatched. Here’s how to take your romance out of the boardroom and into the bedroom:

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BEST OF PENN

1. Go to LinkedIn.com 2. Advanced search: The Wharton School 3. Select Industry: Finance 4. Company: Goldman Sachs, JP Morgan, McKinsey (whichever firm fits your fancy) 5. Optional: Fortune level (50 = old ass dudes, if you’re tryna get it now. 1000 = young dudes who you can debatably fuck without Viagra).

Now, find the most connected MBA and send him/her an InMail—ask about “networking opportunities." Make sure you mention your love of finace and the undeveloped market that is your body.

Once Mr. Hubby responds, ask him to connect. From there you can endorse his skills in proprietary trading. Then he can endorse your skills in the sheets (not talking about Excel here).

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

BEPP250 prefers to fuck you slowly to the Mortal Kombat theme song on loop for 10 hours on YouTube. But before you camp out in a GSR with the door cracked slightly open to prevent the pooling of your tears, remember that somewhere on campus there is another person like you, and another bed like yours. Spending a weekend night holed up in Huntsman is already depressing enough. Dragging yourself back to your room to find a sock on the doorknob fucks you over minus the actual fucking. All of a sudden you’re nothing but a wanderer of the night, left out in the cold while your roommate makes use of your R. Kelly Spotify playlist, which is so untouched it has pixelated dust bunnies on it.

Cheer up and go grab yourself some late–night Axe Body Spray from The Fresh Grocer, because it’s time to make a new friend. This will not be another night spent playing Yu–Gi– Oh! against yourself in a dark Van Pelt corner. Go to your roommate’s lover’s room, knock on the door and brace yourself for some good ol’ human interaction. Maybe you’ll meet your new best friend. Or, better yet, a lover. Remember on How I Met Your Mother when Ted was in The Mother’s apartment like four seasons before they ever met? (Ed. note: If this is a spoiler for you, forget going to their room and get on Netflix, ASAP.) This is you cutting corners. Penn has 10,000 undergrads and a huge chunk of that population is single and ripe for picking. What if the roommate is that slender blonde with the piercing blue eyes who you catch checking you out in your Spanish class? What if the roommate is the person from your freshman hall you had way too much sexual tension with, swiped right on Tinder “by accident,” matched and laughed it off as a joke even though you would totally do it (read: them)? You miss 100% of the shots you don’t aimlessly barge into at 2am.

THE DAILY PENNSYLVANIAN | THEDP.COM WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

Best Place to AntiSABS: Penne

Everyone knows that there are certain places on campus that are perfect for SABS–ing, like the outside deck of Frontera or an elevated surface at Rumor. But sometimes you wake up in the morning in an ugly guy’s bed, with your eyebrows not at all on fleek, and you really just need to avoid people.

What you need is a good anti–SABS location. What you need is a trip to Penne Restaurant and Wine Bar. You know Penne—it’s that vaguely Italian restaurant at 36th and Walnut that you’ve never stepped foot inside.

Maybe your parents have gone there for a drink to pregame your horrible Pan–Asian tap dance show they have to attend because they literally conceived you. But it’ll be a cold day in hell before you see a Penn student there.

That’s what makes it the perfect place to anti–SABS. You step into Penne, order a large glass of their house red and a plate of fettuccine alfredo, and revel in your social irrelevance.

There’s no way you’ll run into your big or that bro in Kappa Sig that would be cute if he weren’t so bitey when you hooked up (Ed. note: please stop biting my lips—they’re not chew toys).

It’s just you and your pasta, the way it should be.

BYOB Weekend Special (Thursdays through Sundays)

Enjoy Your Favorite Bottle of Wine When Dining in Our Restaurant

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BEST OF PENN

Call for more information!

3549 Chestnut Street | (215) 387-8808 | sangkeenoodlehouse.com

Best Place to Throw Up: Sig Chi/ ATO Volleyball Court You stumble home from your late night, only to find yourself in desperate need of a throw up location. Trashcans are too widely dispersed, and any public bathrooms still open (read: Allegro) put you at the risk of running into your hookup from 20 minutes ago. Sure, you could vomit on the side of the road or into some bushes, but you’d like to maintain at least a little dignity while you dry heave.

So, look no further than the sand volleyball court behind ATO. The sand is absorbent and the courts are vacant about five months out of the year (shoutout to the decidedly anti–beach volleyball weather of Philadelphia). Most importantly, the court’s location—hidden in the shadowy depths of Locust Walk—provide you with easy access, while the surrounding shrubbery and architecture add a surprising amount of privacy. It’s like the drunken version of The Secret Garden.

As an added bonus, the sand provides extra padding for you and your hair–holding companion to kneel comfortably.

There’s only one downside: The windows of Hillel put you on full display. Swallow your pride and let everything else come up while rabbis watch you vomit to your heart’s content.

Best Place to Nap: Amy Gutmann's House Since tobacco barons Mr. and Mrs. Eisenlohr turned over 3812 Walnut to dear old Pennsylvania in 1939, this chateau revivalist mansion has probably seen less shut–eye than celebrated architect Horace Trumbauer initially designed it for. Originally passed on to the Graduate School of Education, it was only in 1981 that this West Philadelphia masterpiece came to be the much neglected President’s House.

While Amy G personally may prefer to keep her hubby company in New York, we at Street hear that our friends from SLAP and SOUL got her covered. Despite the availability of unused rooms, recliners and garden benches (the cherry blossoms are beautiful), our activist brethren set up shop on the floor with some coordinated sleep–shouting. (Ed. note: Italian marble may not be the comfiest place to violently dream up Penn’s PILOT contributions, though the 24 newly–empty Philly public schools make a viable alternative.) Not to be outdone, our President’s empathetic response was probably the closest thing she’s gotten to a good old nap in a 90 mile radius. A top tip for the next soirée-crashers: sweet nightmares—die–in’s are out, and lie–in’s are, well, in.

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BEST OF PENN

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Best Place to go on an Adventure: The Woodlands Cemetery

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

There’s nothing more adventurous than blurring the line between life and death. If you’re ready to live on the edge, leave the Penn bubble and walk a few blocks to the Woodlands Cemetery at 40th street and Baltimore avenue. The multipurpose ground is a West Philly gem. The mile–long loop around the edge of cemetery is the perfect path for runners and walkers (including the walking dead). Also, many Philadelphians picnic at the Victorian era grounds. The Hamilton Mansion, located in the cemetery’s center, can be rented out for private events. You can also do drugs here.

Or maybe, make this your formal destination? The Woodlands Cemetery also holds events throughout the year, such as the upcoming GO WEST! Craft Festival this Saturday, April 25th, from 11am to 5pm. The festival highlights local art vendors, food, music and performers—including circus aerialists. This spooky cemetery is so hot right now that people are dying to get in.

Best Place to Cry: Women's Center BRAND NEW Student Apartments!

Enjoy granite kitchens with all appliances, custom private bathrooms, hardwood floors, Flat Screen TVs in family rooms, alarm systems, front door monitors, fire sprinkler systems.

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BEST OF PENN

FREE SHUTTLE SERVICE for all tenants to and from campus every 45 minutes!

38th & Spring Garden: 3BR, 3BTH – starting at $1,895.00 38th & Hamilton: 3BR, 3BTH – starting at $2,000.00 38th & Hamilton: 3BR, 2BTH – starting at $1,950.00

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Women, am I right? Always crying about this or that, probably because of the patriarchy. In any case, Fergie was wrong when she said big girls don’t cry. Sometimes you just have to let it all out, and there’s no better place than the Women’s Center. Seriously, the Women’s Center has an amazing, supportive staff, a community of extremely caring people (not just women), the cutest dog you’ll ever see, couches and free tea. It’s not only the best spot to cry, but really, it’s the best spot to do anything. They can help you get through any crisis, no matter how big or small, and for that we thank them. It might be called the Women’s Center, but the place is perfect for fellas and non–cis people too.

Mom’s made her way to campus to see her little smoochykins. (Ed. note: Yes, you should be embarrassed she still calls you that.) You’ve gone through the routine: shown off your freshly cleaned room, walked up and down Locust and had a late lunch at White Dog. Now it’s time to bring out the big guns and show her how liberal artsy your Penn education has made you. The Barnes Foundation is just a short ride from campus and an oasis of its own. Step onto

the smooth stone pathway and you’ll be greeted by lush greenery, reflective ponds and soothing fountains. Perfect to relax that nervous mother of yours after any concerns raised at White Dog. The Barnes Foundation crafted this quirky museum with the crucial understanding that people hate to read. Enjoy his vision.

No more labels and tedious texts to bog you down, just take in the creative assembly of art. The galleries are intimate and the

arrangement of the art is visually stimulating. The dynamic range of artistic styles gives the exhibits definition and depth. Bonus: the small size of the Barnes means you don’t even have to schlep mom around too much. She'll be captivated for hours and there's plenty of places for you to sit while trying to come up with an Insta caption that’ll make you seem cultured as fuck.

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Best Place to Take Your Mom: The Barnes Foundation

A UNIVERSITY CITY FAVORITE FarM FresH BruncH Every Saturday and Sunday from 10 AM – 2:30 PM with $4 Bloody Marys, Mimosas, Greyhounds and Sangria

BEST OF PENN

3420 sansom st, philadelphia | 215-386-9224 | whitedog.com

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

To everyone: Read Street tomorrow #Shoutouts

Best Happy Hour $6 house wines, sangria, well drinks and discounted draft beer with our specially priced Happy Hour Menu. Mon Fri from 4 - 7 PM

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WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

THE DAILY PENNSYLVANIAN | THEDP.COM WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

The only place on campus where you actually can’t believe it’s vegetarian. The regular lunchtime line is always worth the wait for the best falafel balls at Penn.

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Best Food Truck: Magic Carpet

Best Coffeehouse: Hubbub

Students' Choice MI JIANG/STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER

BEST OF PENN 1 1

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Be SABS-y, recover from your hangover or go hard on your homework in the only restaurant at Penn with a 100 percent health code rating. With donuts almost as delicious as the owner, let the fleet of hipster baristas treat you to your next caffeine rush.

THE DAILY PENNSYLVANIAN | THEDP.COM WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

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Get your favorite pizza, oven-baked sandwiches, and cheesy bread at our two locations!

12 BEST OF PENN

215-662-1400 4438 Chestnut St. Philadelphia, PA

215-557-0940 401 N. 21st St. Philadelphia, PA

Open Late, Deliver Late: Sun-Thur 10:30am-1am • Fri & Sat 10:30am-3am Any delivery charge is not a tip paid to your driver. Our drivers carry less than $20. You must ask for this limited time offer. Delivery Charges and Tax may apply. Prices, participation, delivery area and charges may vary. Returned checks, along with the state’s maximum allowable returned check fee may be electronically presented to your bank. © Domino’s IP Holder LLC. Domino’s Pizza ® and the modular logo are registered trademarks of Domino’s IP Holder LLC.

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It’s a rite of passage at Penn to at least once embrace your inner basic betch and Insta the Love Statue. If you haven’t posed in front of the Love Statue with your new BFFs during NSO or with your bae on Valentine’s Day, you probably go to Drexel.

Treat yo’self to a blowout or manipedi without even having to cab downtown.

GUYRANDY JEAN-GILLES/STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

Best Place to Get Pampered: Adolf Biecker

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Best Instagram Spot: Love Statue

Izakaya * Sushi * Sake

BUY BOOKS BOOKS BUY SELL BOOKS BOOKS SELL SAVE MONEY MONEY SAVE Independent 1962 Independentbooksellers booksellers since since 1962

(267) 233.7488

HOURS Mon - Fri : 11:30am - 10:00pm Sat : 5:00pm - 10:00pm Sun : 5:00pm - 9:00pm

www.cozaraphilly.com

BEST OF PENN 1 3

130 S 34th Street (215)-222-7600 130 S 34thhttp://www.pennbookcenter.com Street (215)-222-7600

33rd & Chestnut Philadelphia, PA 19104

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Best Breakfast Sandwich: Lyn’s The egg sandwiches — which are under $5 btw — are always worth the lunchtime line.

That eggplant parm doe.

You don’t go to Iztaccihuatl for their guac, quesadillas or burritos. You go for the next day’s hazy memories of the good times.

28 beers on tap

Philly’s Best Wings!

Great Service!

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WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

Best Rowdy BYO: Iztaccihuatl

150 Bottled Beers.

A favorite of Penn students for decades!

1116 Walnut Street | 215.627.7676 | www.moriartyspub.com

from Ice Cream and Yogurt to Gourmet Chocolates and Cakes!

WE DELIVER: find us on

1315 Walnut Street | 215-988-9992 |

@phillyscoopdeville

Featuring $2 beers, $3 wines and $4 sangria, Harvest takes happy hour to the next level.

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Best Happy Hour: Harvest

Best Bar: Smokey Joe’s WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

LUKE CHEN/DIRECTOR OF ONLINE PROJECTS

Business Insider recently discovered what we all know to be true — Smoke’s is one of the best college bars in the U.S. Sink or swim is why you’re late to your Wednesday 9 a.m., and you haven’t lived until singing along to Kweder’s rendition of “You Belong With Me.”

Complete Rentals:

$59.99

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THE DAILY PENNSYLVANIAN | THEDP.COM WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

Best Froyo/Ice cream: Franklin Fountain Finally, something historic you actually want to take your parents to.

One of the oldest ice cream parlors in the U.S., Franklin Fountain employees serve up insane sundaes while sporting dope 18th century outfits.

Best Campus Addition: Zesto’s Zesto’s is like Allegro’s hotter older brother. The eatery first began to throw us off our diets when it opened in the fall, providing delicious, cheesy pizza until 3 a.m. on weekends.

NOW LEASING!

THE BEST LOCATIONS

1BR Apartments

42nd & Pine | 44th & Pine

Available July 1! Renovated Eat-in-Kitchen w/ Garbage Disposal Washer/Dryer in Building | Hardwood Floors

3BR Apartment 16 BEST OF PENN

42nd & Pine

Available September 1! 2BTH | Bi-level | Hardwood Floors Central Air | Renovated Kitchen | Washer/Dryer in Building

4019 Locust St.

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OUR 50th YEAR SERVING PENN STUDENTS

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There is possibly nothing better than getting food from almost anywhere delivered with minimal human interaction. Aside from Netflix automatically playing the next episode of "House of Cards," Postmates is the ultimate laziness enabler. And we love it.

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Best Delivery: Postmates

Best Brunch: Sabrina’s

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WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

Sabrina’s is the only place in Philly worth a 20+ minute walk.

Taking a more-is-more approach to brunch — aka, the only way to brunch — our homegirl Sabrina throws caution to the wind and makes french toast bigger than your face stuffed with cream cheese, oreos and blueberries. It creates and defines the term “flavorgasm.”

D MILE

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THR IFT STORE

Clothing, appliances, books, furniture, household items, and more!

214 South 45th Street (Between Locust & Walnut) 215.662.1663

To donate, call 215.662.1663

www.TheSecondMileCenter.com

BEST OF PENN 1 7

Monday–Saturday 10AM–8PM

THE DAILY PENNSYLVANIAN | THEDP.COM

LUKE CHEN/DIRECTOR OF ONLINE PROJECTS

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

Best Use of Bursar: Penn Bookstore Why bursar your latte from Starbucks when you can buy sweats on sweats from the place you’re supposed to buy that Chemistry textbook from?

Happy Hour Monday through Friday, 5pm-7pm Enjoy it on our outdoor patio!

Best Tailor/ Laundry Service: Bonded Cleaners The next time you spill jungle juice on your roommate’s shirt, take it to Bonded, which is essentially the ER for stained clothes.

If you’re trying to not look like an unmade bed for an OCR interview or formal, hit up their same-day dry cleaning.

House Available 42nd & Baltimore

Victorian house with very large rooms. Perfect for college students!

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Includes:

Kitchen open everyday, 11am-1am Bring your appetite!

Happy Hour: $5 Appetizers $1 off all Beer, Wine, and Cocktails 215.386.4600 • NewDeckTavern.com • 3408 Sansom St

8 BR & 3.5 BTHS Wall to wall carpet Storage room Washer & dryer Backyard Finished basement 2 Kitchens 3 Refrigerators Housekeeping Alarm system

Prices range from $425–$525 per person plus utilities.

Available May 1st Contact Said Mohamed at 267-872-5154

With a giant lawn, ultimate study breaks and an easily accessible roof, the Quad is the ultimate dream oncampus living location.

Close to both Tap House and Jimmy John's, The Radian ensures you never have to be further than five minutes away from home. With its clutch location, waking up 15 minutes before class isn’t just possible — it’s a lifestyle.

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015

Best Off-Campus Housing: The Radian

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Best On-Campus Housing: The Quad

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Stopinin Stop

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LUKE CHEN/DIRECTOR OF ONLINE PROJECTS

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Today learnfor how tomake make Don’ttotosettle less than Today learn how to TheAxis Axis your home away The your home away THE BEST! fromhome! home! from

20 BEST OF PENN WEDNESDAY, APRIL 22, 2015 THE DAILY PENNSYLVANIAN | THEDP.COM