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NHS FRESHMAN DOESN'T LET WHEELCHAIR SLOW HER / P5

'DOLLY' HAS NOBLESVILLE LOOK THANKS TO DESIGNER / P11

AUTHOR SWEAZY EXCITED ABOUT 2ND NATIONAL BOOK RELEASE / P12

Tuesday March 30, 2010 FREE Trish Morris-Butcher opened Artists on the Square a year ago to create a showcase for her work and the work of others.

Artists on the Square gallery celebrates its first year in historic Joseph Building / P2 Photo by Mary Milz


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Artists on the Square gallery celebrates its first year in historic Joseph Building By Mary Milz Current in Noblesville Trish Morris-Butcher opened the Artists on the Square gallery in historic Joseph Building downtown to have a place where she and other artists could showcase their work year-round. “If you’re self-taught or just starting, there’s no place to show it,” she says. “This Morris-Butcher has always been a dream of mine.” A year later the gallery is home to 35 artists who commit to working there 6 hours a month and giving the gallery a 25 percent cut of everything they sell there. The owner and the artists will celebrate the gallery’s one-year anniversary with an open house from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. April 2. “What Trish has done is awesome,” says Jordan Harrison, a Noblesville photographer who displays and sells her photographs there. “It really gives you an opportunity to show off your work.” Wend Boomhower, who displays her silk paintings there, enjoys “mixing with the other artists. It’s a mutual appreciation society. It’s nice to be in that environment,” she says. And while still operating at a loss, Morris-Butcher says she is committed to staying open. “I’m excited about summer,” says the painter, who also works with mosaics. “I think we’ll be busy again.” Here’s a look at three artists whose work visitors will see in the gallery:

Jordan Harrison, 26, sees her hometown through the lens of her camera. She carries her Canon Rebel with her everywhere she goes. “You have to be ready to capture things,” she says. What Harrison captures most are old buildings – or parts of them -- and landscapes. “I love to capture what people miss,” says Harrison, who caught the shutterbug three years ago. “I love to give them a different perspective.” So, instead of shooting the entire courthouse across the street from the gallery, she might zoom in on its clock tower. She also likes to “tweak the originals to pull out the colors.” Harrison, a collections analyst at an alarm systems company, signed on with the gallery when it first opened, and the exposure has paid off in sales. The best-sellers are her photo collages of Noblesville landmarks. “It’s exciting. It makes me proud that something I thought was beautiful and captured Noblesville was appreciated,” she says.

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Glass artist Tonya Glenn came to Noblesville where she heard art was appreciated.

Tonya Glenn, 35, works in a hot medium. Very hot. She fires up the kiln to at least 1,300 degrees to get started. The Kokomo mother of four is a glass artist who uses fusible glass to make jewelry, clocks, bowls and abstract pieces. “Lots of times I put it in the kiln and it’s almost like Christmas when it comes out with all the changing colors,” she says. Glenn’s interest was sparked two years ago when her husband gave her a glass pendant for their first anniversary. Having made jewelry in high school she wanted to try her hand at art glass. She likes “getting the glass fluid and shaping it.” Glenn was shopping for a permanent venue to display her works when she and found it at Artists on the Square. “I heard Noblesville was popular with artists and that people here appreciate art,” she says. “The gallery gets me out there and motivates me to make unique pieces.” Photos by Mary Milz

Location: 853 Conner St., Noblesville Phone: (317) 716-3998 Hours: 11 a.m.-5 p.m., Tuesday-Thursday 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Friday and Saturday

Photographer Jordan Harrison likes to photograph the not-so-obvious in Noblesville.

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Wend Boomhower uses silk painting to escape the boundaries of graphic design.

Wend Boomhower, 53, is a professional graphic designer who likes to color outside the lines. The Noblesville resident credits the gallery with giving her a chance to return to her “real passion,” which is art. Boomhower began experimenting with silk paintings a year ago. She paints colorful, abstract patterns on exotic Chinese silk. It’s an art form that allows her to combine elements of work and play. “Graphic design is structured and organized and silk is wild and untamed,” she says. “As a graphic designer I try to tame the silk by creating boundaries.” Boomhower joined the gallery in January, two months after her husband Mark Boomhower, began displaying his photographic art there. Having her work showcased keeps her motivated. “If I have a purpose or objective, it works better. Knowing I have a space on the wall, I want to provide more (pieces).”

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We put more hearts back on rhythm. Clarian North Medical Center is part of the team leading the way in correcting heart arrhythmia – a heart that’s out of rhythm. Our system of highly trained physicians includes fellowship-trained, best-in-class cardiologists from the IU School of Medicine, vested in teaching, treating and researching heart diseases and disorders. Found in about 2.2 million Americans, atrial fibrillation, the leading cause of arrhythmia, produces symptoms like palpitations, shortness of breath, fatigue, dizziness and can generally be controlled well with medication. Left untreated, the risk of stroke, heart failure and heart muscle disease increases, making it essential for you to tune into your body and seek the highest quality care to re-establish your rhythm.

Would you like to learn more? Free Heart Arrhythmia Seminar TUESDAY, APRIL 6, 6:30 P.M. Clarian North Medical Center Learning Center 11700 North Meridian Street, Carmel Cardiologist Woodrow Corey, MD, will share the latest information about arrhythmia diagnosis and treatment. Space is limited, so RSVP by calling 317-688-2829 or online at www.clariannorth.com

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The public option Founded Sept. 15, 2009, at Noblesville, IN Vol. I, No. 31 Copyright 2009. Current Publishing, LLC All Rights Reserved. 1 South Range Line Road, Suite 220 Carmel, IN 46032

317.489.4444 Publisher – Brian Kelly brian@currentincarmel.com / 414.7879 General Manager – Steve Greenberg steve@currentincarmel.com / 847.5022 Managing Editor - Zach Dunkin zach@currentnoblesville.com / 908.2697 Associate Editor – Terry Anker terry@currentincarmel.com Art Director – Zachary Ross zross@ss-times.com / 787-3291 Associate Artist – Lerin Morkal lerin@currentincarmel.com / 523.2956 Senior Reporter – Martha Allan

OUR VIEWS

It is our position that our schools are to be lauded concerning both aptitude and desire in preparing students for life after graduation. Too often we expect our youth to master calculus, music, art and geopolitics to satisfy our concept of “excellent education.” Dismal statistics on employment rates following direct entry into the workforce after high school and even four-year college, coupled with the continual demand for more money from tax and tuition payers, creates a demand for alternatives. Schools must consider employer expectations for workers. Isn’t it more important for those who may not excel at academics to understand the basics of balancing a checkbook and budgeting? Is a lesson in avoiding the accumulation of an unsustainable debt better than an ISTEP-required regimen? Is the pursuit of a high college entrance percentage distracting us from teaching basics to those unlikely to benefit from the time and money spent on the paper chase? Schools must offer students an opportunity to redirect their learning path at an early enough age to increase the graduation of employer-ready graduates. Are current results so good that we should not consider alternatives? We think not!

Be active

It is our position that our community provides us with an abundance of opportunities to get outside and be active. Whether it’s walking, running, hiking, biking, rollerblading, canoeing, fishing or going to Cool Creek Park to fly a kite with your kids, take advantage of the plethora of amenities we have available right in our back yard. Start with a stroll along the Monon Greenway, one of the Midwest’s most highly acclaimed rail-trails. If you missed the Mini Marathon deadline in Indy, visit the Zionsville-based Tuxedo Brothers Event Management Web site (at www.tuxbros.com) to check out what other running events are going on throughout the year. Visit our great local running/fitness shops – Athletic Annex, Runner’s Forum, the Running Company – to get fitted for the latest in technical apparel and shoes that will get you motivated to get out and take that next step in your active lifestyle.  Hamilton County was recently rated the healthiest county in the state by the County Health Rankings and was in the 90th percentile for the nation. With more than 59 miles of trails in our Indy Parks Greenways System, there is always an afternoon of fresh air and exercise just a short drive away.

Advertising Sales Executive – Kate Holleman kate@currentnoblesville.com / 379.9400 Sales Executive – Nicole Miller-Dixon nicole@currentnoblesville.com / 246.0985 Sales Executive – Dennis O’Malia dennis@currentincarmel.com / 370.0749

Business Office Bookkeeper - Deb Vlasich deb@currentincarmel.com / 489.4444 The views of the columnists in Current In Noblesville are their own and do not necessarily reflect the positions of this newspaper.

BUT DON’T COUNT ON IT

strange laws

CONSTITUTION CLOSEUP

Photo Illustration

Our nation has all sorts of arcane, nonsensical laws on the books. Each week, we’ll share one with you. In Connecticut, in order for a pickle to be considered a pickle, it must bounce. Source: Weird Laws (iPhone application)

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Every week, we will print a portion of the U.S. Constitution, followed by a portion of the Indiana Constitution. We encourage you to benchmark government policies against these bedrock documents. Today: the U.S. Constitution.. Article. V. continued …which, in either Case, shall be valid to all Intents and Purposes, as Part of this Constitution, when ratified by the Legislatures of three fourths of the several States, or by Conventions in three fourths thereof, as the one or the other Mode of Ratification may be proposed by the Congress; Provided that no Amendment which may be made prior to the Year One thousand eight hundred and eight shall in any Manner affect the first and

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fourth Clauses in the Ninth Section of the first Article; and that no State, without its Consent, shall be deprived of its equal Suffrage in the Senate [Possibly abrogated by Amendment XVII]. Article. VI. All Debts contracted and Engagements entered into, before the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be as valid against the United States under this Constitution, as under the Confederation. This Constitution, and the Laws of the United States which shall be made in Pursuance thereof; and all Treaties made, or which shall be made, under the Authority of the United States, shall be the supreme Law of the Land; and the Judges in every State shall be bound thereby, any Thing

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Wheelchair doesn’t slow Alexis; that’s how she rolls COMMENTARY By Zach Dunkin The two things Alexis Allen likes best about playing basketball is fouling and setting picks. It’s no wonder the six guys on her team fear this spunky freshman from Noblesville High School and her two female teammates. “I think we girls give them a run for their money,” said Allen. Born with spina bifida that has caused major nerve damage from the waist down and paralysis below her knees, Alexis is among nine area teenagers competing on the Rehabilitation Hospital of Indiana Racers wheelchair basketball team. The Racers will be playing in the National Wheelchair Basketball Association Championships in Denver April 7-11. “Alexis is a great role model for these kids,” praised Coach Jake Patrick. “She concentrates on what she can do and not what she can’t do, which is what I try to teach all the kids.” At a recent fundraising scrimmage at the Community Center of the Boys & Girls Club of Noblesville, nearly 400 spectators showed, each making donations to help defray $10,000 in travel expenses for players and family members. (If you wish to help, send a check payable to RHI Sports to RHI Sports Program, 4141 Shore Dr., Indianapolis 46254, or visit www.rhisports. com and click on “Donate to Team.”) “The scrimmage was fun because the people there got to see of different side of us,” said Alexis.

Photo provided by Angela Allen

Alexis Allen, 15, hasn’t let spina bifida deter her.

The 15-year-old has not let 11 surgeries and a lifelong use of a wheelchair keep her inactive. In addition to basketball she has participated in wheelchair track, swimming, tennis, water skiing and surfing. She’d be out on the slopes with her dad and brother next week skiing but doesn’t believe Patrick would approve. “I don’t want to get hurt before I play,” she said. An English devotee in school, Allen says she hopes to put her word skills to good use someday. “I really enjoy public speaking, so I want to get into a position where I am able to raise awareness for people with disabilities,” she said. She certainly has my attention.

From the backshop It's time to make your mom a winner Mother’s Day rapidly is approaching. In celebration of all moms in our area, we’re teaming with Ology Spa at Clarian North Medical Center to reward a special woman with a wonderful prize package – just for her. It’s the first Rejuvenate Your Mom Contest, and nominations may be made online at www.currentincarmel.com or www.ologyspa. com through April 27. As important as the haul our winner will receive is the fact that someone cared enough to nominate her and the reasons why. So, think hard about the No. 1 woman in your life that might be “world class” but possibly “taken for granted.” (See the advertisement on page 18.) ••• Let’s give credit where it’s due. There’s been a great deal of criticism over President Barack Obama and his pay czar cutting compensation an average of 15 percent for top executives at companies that received federal bailout dollars, but have yet to repay the money. It’s the right thing to do. These companies took taxpayer money, so they have to play by the established rules. ••• We find it troubling that the new heath-

Brian Kelly & Steve Greenberg care bill, touted by supporters as the greatest thing since the remote control, may require up to 16,500 new IRS agents to enforce. So, Obama is saying, in effect, “This bill is so great that I’m going to sic the IRS on you to make sure you’re in compliance, and if not, you’ll be fined.” And let’s be honest, do you really think the IRS will only be looking for health care compliance? It’s all about control, of us, and making sure our government knows everything about us. Really scary stuff. ••• We wish Noblesville Mayor John Ditslear the speediest of recoveries in the wake of his heart-stent surgery last week. He was planning to be back in the office this week.

Zach Dunkin is the managing editor for Current in Noblesville. You may e-mail him at zach@ currentnoblesville.com

Readers' views Publicity of church dinner appreciated Editor, I just want to thank you for the publicity you gave us in The Current. We had a great turn out for our Chicken/Beef Noodle Dinner at Refuge Christian Church.  Your paper was the only one who gave us publicity, although I had contacted

the other local papers.  Thanks again.  With the money we raised we will be able to help others in the community and our church.  Shirley Ward, president, Refuge Christian Women’s Circle.

Pit bulls need to be eliminated Editor, I know you are pushing Pit Bull Education Month and you (The Humane Society of Hamilton County) are probably up to your eyeballs in pit bulls, but the March 16 article by Rebecca Stevens is propaganda and nowhere near the truth. So, “pit bull terriers consistently score better on temperament tests" than golden retrievers (ha!), border collies, boxers and German shepherds. Were the testers drunken psychos, morally corrupt, drug-addicted or insane? Maybe the testers forgot about the fact that 47 percent of all reported dog attacks

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against humans are committed by these good tempered pit bulls. Yes, I know that other dog breeds attack people, but never with the ferocity and intent to kill a pit bull brings to the attack, along with ability to get the job done. With most dogs, you won't get hurt, unless you need to get hurt. With pit bulls you can be killed by merely taking out the garbage. God knows irresponsible owners aren't helping the situation by breeding more of these malicious dogs. To be blunt: pit bulls as a breed need to be eliminated. Larry Megazzi 46062 

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Selling a house is as stressful as it gets

DISPATCHES » Police application deadline approaching – The deadline for applying the Noblesville Police Department’s next personnel selection process is at 4:30 p.m. April 2. The selection process will take approximately 4‐6 months and will establish a list of qualified applicants to be considered for hire as positions for police officer become available. Applicants should complete a pre‐application form online at www.cityofnoblesville.org/police or by visiting the Noblesville Police Department. » Return Census forms by April 1 – Hamilton County Commissioner Christine Altman is appealing to residents of Hamilton County to respond to the 2010 Census questionnaire and return it by mail. Everyone is expected to return their completed survey by April 1. The 2010 Census will help determine how more than $400 billion in federal funds are distributed to state and local governments every year. “We want to make sure Hamilton County counts,” said Altman. » Safe Sitter sessions help young babysitters – Children ages 11 to 13 can learn how to handle babysitting emergencies, how to keep their charges secure, and how to nurture and guide a young child at Safe Sitter from 9 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. April 6 at Forest Park Lodge, 878 Forest Court, Noblesville. Cost is $30. For information call ( 317) 770-5750.

Commentary By Danielle Wilson I just want to throw up right now. We had our home inspection today, and I am waiting on the results. If they are decent, then we will have officially sold our house. If they aren’t, then the deal will probably fall through. My husband gives it a 50/50 chance of coming back bad for us. So I can now confirm that selling your house is one of the most stressful experiences you can go through, after death of a loved one and divorce. (In one chart, incarceration also ranked higher. Fair enough.) Leaving for showings is one thing, but today when I returned home after the inspection, I actually felt violated. I knew people had been scrutinizing and analyzing every nook and cranny of my home and deciding whether or not they could live with it. They were judging me and my family based on the condition of our roof and garage doors and sump pump. It made me want to take a shower, except I could tell they’d looked in there too and probably commented on the one little chipped tile toward the back wall. Will they still want to buy our house? Will they be able to look past its flaws and remember why they made their offer in the first place? Will we have to go back to daily showings and the possibility of not being able to sell? Will I ever sleep again? THREE HOURS LATER: I just read the report, and I still feel sick. Some of the comments were not unexpected, but some were. And the fact that we can’t defend the lack of an electrical outlet in the island or explain why there is a stain on the bathroom ceiling just honks me off. Do they care that the stain has been here since we moved in, nine years ago? That there has never been a leak? That I’ve noticed it maybe twice in all those months of actually living in that room? No, I’m sure they don’t.

I guess that’s what’s really getting to me. I’ve spent a lot of time in this house. I’ve invested money and sweat and gallons of creative juices to make this the perfect place to raise my family. I’ve brought three infants home from the hospital to this address. I’ve mowed the lawn approximately 400 times. I’ve spent countless hours finding just the right shade of green for my family room: Dutch Boy lonely pines in a satin finish. I’ve hosted eight Kentucky Derby parties on my back deck, serving hundreds of authentic mint juleps and plates of country ham. Hell, I’ve even watched my husband track and kill a coon in his PJs up in this very attic. But none of that is in the stupid inspection report. They didn’t give me any kudos for finishing the basement or planting perennials or installing granite countertops. There is no “great” or “good” category, only “major repair/safety hazard” and “needs maintenance.” And who knows what our buyers will ask to be fixed. Could be the rotted windows or the chimney mortar cap or maybe just the settled front stoop. I’ve got a whole week to worry about that. Yippee! NEXT MORNING: I had a good cry last night (“It’s just tension, it doesn’t mean anything!”) and felt marginally better when I awoke, only to discover our dream house is now off the market. Again. So I e-mailed my realtor and suggested they begin offering psychiatric services and look into keeping a G.I. physician on retainer. The nausea is back tenfold. Peace out.

Danielle Wilson is a Carmel resident and contributing columnist. You may e-mail her at danielle@ currentincarmel.com.

Knock it off with the bomb scare stuff; it’s not funny COMMENTARY By Leslie Webber Things were much different when I was in high school. We had a payphone in our parking lot because, at that time, Wall Street guys were the only ones with cell phones. Like clockwork, someone called in a “bomb scare” from that very payphone on the first sunny, warm day we had. Back then, it was a “bomb scare,” not a “threat,” because honestly, who would dream of such a thing happening? The threats were taken seriously and our school was searched while we basked in the spring sun on the bleachers. However, all involved were fairly confident it was just another idiot who decided everyone needed some time outside. My high school days were pre -Columbine, pre -9/11, and pre-24 hour cable news outlets breathlessly reporting another tragedy. Things are different now. A lunatic planting a bomb in a school no longer seems entirely impossible. When I answered the 7:30 a.m. call that read “Noblesville Schools” on caller id a few weeks ago; I had a pretty good guess as to what was going on. Sure enough, an exasperated Dr. Libbie Conner was calling to inform parents the school system was experiencing their second

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bomb threat in as many months. The police, Dr. Conner, the administrators, teachers, bus drivers, and parents all have enough on their plates without dealing with such nonsense. At a time when budgets are stretched thin and educators are trying to make the most of time and resources, the last thing they want to do is waste both. In a post-9/11 world, threats no longer have quotation marks. These situations are taken very, very seriously and what might have once been considered a prank, is now regarded as criminal activity. Parents, take some time to talk with your children so you can be certain they are completely aware of the trouble they could find themselves in should they attempt such a stunt. If whoever placed the calls suggesting he or she had placed a bomb somewhere on school property happens to be reading this, as my mom would say… “Knock it off!” Leslie Webber is a Noblesville resident, wife, mother of two very young children and a professional photographer. Visit her Web site at www.lesliewebber.com.

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2 miles NW of Riverview Hospital off SR 38...right across from the fire station

Serving Hamilton County since 1982 ...where friends meet for fitness!

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Ditslear and fellow county mayors put their ‘heart’ in meal deliveries Commentary By Krista Bocko Just a day after he was released from Riverview Hospital following heart surgery in which he had two stents implanted, Mayor John Ditslear joined other Hamilton County mayors in delivering meals to area senior citizens during the “Mayors for Meals Day” program. The March 24 delivery was part of the March for Meals campaign, seeking to raise awareness of senior hunger and to encourage action on a local level through public events, partnerships with local businesses, volunteer recruitment and fundraising. Meals on Wheels is an organization whose “mission is to deliver nutritional meals to elderly, disabled and homebound residents who are unable to prepare food for themselves due to a physical or mental challenge.” The organization’s primary goal is to help clients remain living independently within the community in their own homes for as long as possible. Meals are delivered from 11 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. Monday through Friday. Compassionate volunteers deliver

more than 45,000 meals annually throughout the eight communities of Hamilton County. Visit their Web site at www. mealsonwheelshc.org or call (317) 776-7159 for information on how to volunteer or donate to this worthy organization. It costs just $6 to provide meal service for one day. NOTE TO READERS: Look for “Historic Homes of Noblesville, “a new feature which debuted March 23 to run every other week in The Current. The Noblesville Preservation Alliance is looking for homeowners whose homes have previously been on the Home Tour to be featured in the Historic Homes spotlight. If your home has been on the tour, and you’d like to be featured, please email me at kbocko@sbcglobal.net. If you aren’t sure if your home has been on the Historic Home Tour, I can probably find out for you. Krista Bocko, her husband and four children live in “Old Town.” Noblesville in a historic home. She can be reached at www. cachetwrites.blogspot. com

Photo courtesy of Sauce Pan Creative

Mayor John Ditslear delivers a meal to Noblesville resident Milford Pearson during Meals on Wheels' "Mayors for Meals Day. "

Parks Department offering lots of sports classes for ages 3 to 5 Current in Noblesville The Noblesville Parks Department is taking registration for several of its athletic and sports sessions for children ages 5 and younger. Pre-registration is required for all classes. For more details about the classes or to register, visit www.cityofnoblesville.org/Parks or call the Parks Recreation office at (317) 770-5750. The April/May programs are: Sports Awareness for 3 – 5 year olds (Dillon Park Events Lawn): Learn a new sport each session including warm-ups, exercises, rules of the game, drills and skills, and the game itself. Cost is $35 per child for Noblesville residents/$40 for non-residents. Sessions: Tuesdays, April 13, 20, 27, and May 4 from 11:30 a.m. - 12:15 p.m. Tee Ball/Softball for 3 – 5 year olds (Dillon Park Events Lawn): Develop baseball skills in a fun, safe, non-competitive four week class. Skills include batting, throwing, catching, and teamwork. Class will progress from tee ball to coach pitched softball. Cost is $35 per child for Noblesville residents/$40 for non-residents. Bring a catcher’s mitt. Two sessions offered: Wednesdays, April 14, 21, 28, and May 5 from 11 – 11:45 a.m.; and Thursdays, April 15, 22, 29, and May 6 from 6:30 -7:15 p.m. Soccer for Parent and Child (Dillon Park Events Lawn): Give your three-year-old playtime

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with a parent while getting acquainted with a structured program of soccer. Sessions include warm-ups, skills, drills, and games. This class is recommended for three-year-olds prior to them enrolling in the Preschool Soccer class. Cost is $35 per child for Noblesville residents/$40 for non-residents. Sessions: Wednesdays, April 14, 21, 28, and May 5 from 5:30 – 6:15 p.m. Preschool Soccer for 3 – 5 year olds (Dillon Park Events Lawn): Develop skills including kicking, dribbling, blocking, and teamwork in a fun, non-competitive four week program. Sessions include warm-ups, rules of the game, drills, and fun games to reinforce skills. Cost is $35 per child for Noblesville residents/$40 for non-residents. Two sessions offered: Three-year-olds: Wednesdays, April 14, 21, 28, and May 5 from 6:30 – 7:15 p.m.; and four-and-five-year-olds: Wednesdays, April 14, 21, 28, and May 5 from 7:30 – 8:15 p.m. Flag Football for 4-5 year olds (Dillon Park Events Lawn): Develop skills in running, kicking, passing, and teamwork in a non-competitive environment. Sessions include warm-ups, drills, skills, rules of the game, and fun games. Cost is $35 per child for Noblesville residents/$40 for non-residents. Two sessions offered: Wednesdays, April 14, 21, 28, and May 5 from 12 – 12:45 p.m.; Thursdays, April 15, 22, 29, and May 6 from 7:30 – 8:15 p.m.

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DISPATCHES » Erasing dark circles – It may not be your lifestyle that causes those dark circles under your eyes. For some people, the discoloration is from blood vessels that lie close to the surface. Age exaggerates the problem. There are three good options, though, to decrease or eliminate the dark circles:                • Wrinkle creams can help by boosting elastin production. • Injectable fillers can be used to replace lost fat tissue. • Concealer can temporarily make the area appear less dark. -Remedy   » Tattoo removal – Removing a tattoo is a procedure best left to professionals, and even in professional hands, there’s really only one good way to do it: qualityswitched (or Q-switched) lasers. Dermabrasion, salabrasion, cryosurgery (also known as cyrotherapy) and surgical removal all leave scars and can be painful. The laser removal breaks down the ink into particles small enough for the body to absorb without scarring. - www.health.com  

Gym is no place for a fashion GRAND OPENING show; think safety, comfort By April Conard Current in Noblesville A dilemma for some exercisers is what to put on when they go “clubbing.” And by clubbing I don’t mean Saturday night in Broad Ripple; I mean your fitness club. First of all, the lamest excuse I have ever heard for not going to the gym – and believe me, I have been told some real pathetic ones – was that they had nothing to wear. I mean, come on people, you don’t own one pair of sweats and a T-shirt? I guess when you think of a fitness facility you may envision people in brightly colored sports bras and Spandex shorts, but this is usually not the case. I mean, don’t get me wrong, a sports bra is a must, however baring the midriff is not. When selecting your fitness fashion, there are a few things to keep in mind. • It should be comfortable. Consider your own comfort and that of those who see you while you are working out. Please take in to consideration what can be mistakenly revealed to others when getting your burn on.

• Safety is top priority. Clothing shouldn’t be too baggy or long; you could get caught or trip. • Your attire should make you feel ready to work hard. Choose things you like. If you don’t feel confident in yourself at the gym, your workout will suffer, if you go at all. There are many options out there for workout clothes, to fit everyone’s body and budget. The bottom line is not to worry what other people think regarding your attire at the gym. It’s not a fashion show. If you do belong to a gym where everyone looks like Ken and Barbie, and you’re uncomfortable there, move on. My thought is that we go to the gym to look better for later, not now, so throw on whatever works for you and get in there! Noblesville resident April Conard is an NETA- certified trainer and Group Fitness Director at the Noblesville Athletic Club. You may contact her at nac@nacfitness.com

The bottom line is not to worry what other people think regarding your attire at the gym.

AH-H-H-CHOO! The attack of the histamines! COMMENTARY By Carol Rossetti, N.D. Are allergies the bane of your existence? Do you suffer each and every spring with a barrage of annoying symptoms? Itchy nose and throat, runny nose, coughing, sneezing, itchy eyes. Help is on the way So, how do allergies get started and why do they get worse as you get older? It is a digestive issue. If you are unable to digest your food because of low stomach acid or if you are taking antacids, your food sits in your gut and putrefies. This putrefication gives off histamines causing symptoms requiring an antihistamine to combat the symptoms. Allergic symptoms build up like building blocks until it becomes too tall and it falls down causing those hasty effects. There are several things you can do now: • Get rid of all forms of antacids as they make the problem worse. If you have indigestion, take some food enzymes or

8 | March 30, 2010

Proactazyme Plus to help you digest. • Spring is a great time to clean up your body. I like a product called Clean Start. It not only cleans up your intestines but it scrubs them clean and you get a fresh start. Cleanses are best to be done four times a year when the seasons change. • I also recommend HistaBlock and I am especially fond of a Chinese formula called Spleen Activator. It is terrific and turns off the symptoms after about one week of use. It is concentrated so you only need two daily. • Eat a clean diet and stay away from wheat and dairy. After a couple of weeks or less, you will notice a wonderful difference as you find you are able to take those long spring walks, smell the blooming blossoms, and leave the tissue box behind.

NEW TO NOBLESVILLE SATURDAY APRIL 17th 10:00 am-6:00 pm

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“I’m proud to wear shorts now.” -TRACY

LOOK AND FEEL GOOD AND SAVE MONEY DOING IT. Find out if vein treatment is covered by your insurance. Decatur Vein Clinic got Tracy back to her normal self in no time. She used to suffer in silence and be embarrassed, but not anymore. Why live with painful and unsightly legs when you might be covered by insurance? We provide full-service insurance assistance, beginning with predetermination of benefits. Plus, we offer: • Board-certified professional staff with years of experience • Minimally invasive procedures for rapid recovery

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We accept most insurance plans, including Medicare. Get ready to wear shorts this spring by starting treatments now. Better looking, better feeling legs can be yours.

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Look Feel Live Better Noblesville resident Carol Rossetti, N.D. is a Naturopathic Doctor with Wellness By Nature. She can be reached at (317) 773-1612 or visit www.wellnessbynature.com.

FACT: Varicose veins might be a symptom of other circulatory problems. Learn more at FIXVEIN.com.

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MONEY MATTERS Part of Noblesville Schools’ budget cut plan includes nixing use of the freshman campus pool. Is that fair? “The freshmen already have to be separated from the rest of the high school body, and they are missing out on some of the activities. They could at least keep one of the more exciting parts of gym class!” Bekah Crouch, Noblesville “The only problem I have with it not being used is that the freshmen won’t be able to use the pool during the school year for gym. Other than that, it seems like an okay way to save a little money.” Taylor Coonce, Noblesville “If the elimination of the pool takes out all pool sports from the freshmen PE curriculum, then I am opposed to it. The freshmen should get an equal opportunity to use the same PE equipment.” Allen Graham, Noblesville

DISPATCHES » Somerset seminar – Join Somerset CPAs on March 31 for a free seminar entitled “Building Your Management Control Plan and Business Finance,” 7:45-10 a.m. at the Somerset Conference Center, 3395 River Crossing Parkway in Indianapolis. You will gain an understanding of how to utilize a management control plan in your business.   » Investing on the cheap: 2 stocks under $5 1. ValueVision Media (WTV) – Its ShopNBC is the smallest of the three home shopping networks but may grow up like its bigger rivals.   2. Chimera Investment (CIM) – This company purchases repackaged home mortgages and passes most of the yield to investors because it is a real-estate investment trust.   - moneycentral.msn.com » Subway to debut breakfast menu – Starting April 5, Subway will begin offering egg, meat and cheese breakfast sandwiches, using healthier options such as egg whites. Prices will range from about $2 to $6.

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WHAT’S IT WORTH

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noblesville golf and batting center MY OPINION

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Type: Traditional American Age: Built in 2004 Location: 5724 Kenyon Trail, Noblesville Neighborhood: West Haven  Square footage:  4,296  Rooms: Four bedrooms upstairs, 2 ½ baths, great room, living room, center island kitchen with breakfast room and walk-in pantry, main level laundry room, finished basement with large rec/play room and spacious bonus room. Strengths: Move-in ready and like new,  hardwoods in the kitchen and breakfast room, arched windows and soaring ceiling in the great room, lots of living/entertaining space in the basement, double sinks in the upstairs hall bath, oversized patio and fenced-in back yard. Listed by:  Bart Gauker, RE/MAX Legends Group, 317-819-3100.

Kurt Meyer is a Noblesville resident and realtor for F.C. Tucker. Contact him at (317) 776-0200 or talktokurt@ comcast.net

Owner Sid Davis has returned from his annual “winter hibernation” to open the Noblesville Golf and Batting Center for the season. Davis eases into spring with March hours of 10 a.m. until dark Monday through Saturday and noon until dark on Sunday, weather permitting. The facility, less than 2 miles west of downtown Noblesville off State Road 32, features a golf range with 35 tees, an 18-hole miniature golf course, five batting cages with arm-type delivery and sand volleyball courts. A snack bar offers a varity treats, including pizza, hot dogs and popcorn, and drinks. Golf lessons are also available. Buckets of golf balls range from $5-$10. Miniature golf is $4, and kids ages 6 and younger play for free. For groups of 10 or more, the cost is $3 per person. Batting cage hitters pay 50 cents for 10 balls; helmets and bats are provided free of charge. Special indoor and outdoor party packages for groups of eight or more include: unlimited miniature golf, individual pizza or hot dog and soft drink for $6 per person, and 40 swings in the batting cage or one small basketball of range balls and unlimited miniature golf, an individual size pizza or hot dog and soft drink for $8 per person. Sid says you can bring your own cake and ice cream. Regular summer hours will be 10 a.m. to 9 p.m. Monday through Thursday, 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. Friday and Saturday and noon to 9 p.m. Sunday, through October. Owner: Sid Davis 17400 Willow View Road 317-773-2908 | www.golfandbattingcenter.com

Always run like it is daytime COMMENTARY By David Cain Now, I’m not an avid runner; I run for my blood pressure. Shockingly, my doctor informed me a couple years ago that I had high blood pressure. Imagine that, a 42-year-old, high stress, no hair, impatient, obsessive, somewhat compulsive workaholic with high blood pressure? It just didn’t add up. I endeavored to solve this mystery. I quit drinking. I started exercising. I cut out sodas. I dialed back salt. I went to bed earlier. I relaxed. And each variable I tracked on a daily graph for two weeks to see what made a difference, just like any good obsessive-compulsive would do. As expected, exercising had the biggest impact. Great, the one thing I didn’t want to do. So I’ve become a self-proclaimed blood-pressure runner. Running is the only exercise I can continue to do. Seems that if you can just get a mile from your house, you have to get back. It’s the only exercise where I can’t stop in the middle and quit. I’m usually a morning runner, lumbering along before the light of day. Under the cover of darkness in the light of the dawn, I can hide my bad running form and matching awkward outfit. Last week, I was preparing to run in the morning, peeked out the door, and was greeted with a rush of cold. I knew the day would usher

in near-60s temperatures, so I decided to defer. I’d wait until after work to run. It seemed like a good idea. That night, I got home at an early 6 p.m. and hit the streets. As I trudged along, I felt a need to pick up the pace. Cars were rushing by, and people were looking at me. Running in the light of day was different. I had to be better or, more likely, I wanted to be better because I felt people were watching. My form improved, my pace quickened, I felt better. The lumbering bear shot with a dart had been transformed into a nimble cat. Then my mind drifted to the work. I wondered how many businesses were running in the dark? How many were hiding in the early dawn of the morning instead of running in the daylight? Was my organization making all the decisions like we were running in the light of day? I don’t know for sure, but it’s my new mantra: Run in the daylight. Be open, transparent, clear, and fearless. Chances are you’ll get faster and more functional.

Current in Noblesville

David Cain works at MediaSauce, a digital media and online marketing company in Carmel. David welcomes your questions or comments at David.Cain@MediaSauce.com.

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March 30, 2010 | 9


There’s nothing average about our top doctors www.clariannorth.com During any given week, our physicians at Clarian North Medical Center perform an average of 175 surgeries, 49 deliveries and numerous other procedures, making our doctors anything but average. In honor of Doctor’s Day 2010, we extend a sincere thank you to our dedicated medical staff, part of the very best from Clarian Health who have been recognized as 90 of the area’s 142 Top Doctors. As part of the Clarian Health system, our physicians have collaborated to bring state-of-the-art technology, more than 100 years of health care experience and compassionate caregivers together for superior patient treatment. Going above and beyond, the physicians at Clarian North are the foundation of our success. For a physician referral, please call 317-688-DOCS.

10 | March 30, 2010

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DISPATCHES » Eggs, Easter bunny and country singer at free hunt – Youngsters can search for more than 10,000 eggs filled with candy at the free Easter Egg Hunt, beginning at 2 p.m. April 3 on the north field of the Noblesville Golf and Batting Center, 17400 Willow View Road. The age groups are 3 and younger, 4-8 and 9-11. Four prizes will be awarded to children in each age group. The Easter bunny will visit from 1:30 p.m. to 3 p.m. Country singer Linda Lee Essig will sign and sell her new CD. For more information, call (317) 773-2909

Noblesville costume designer’s creations make a difference in ‘Dolly’

» Easter Dinner at The Mansion – The Mansion at Oak Hill, 116th St., and Hazel Dell Parkway, Carmel, is having an Easter Day Buffet for the family from 12:15 p.m. to 2:45 p.m. April 4. The menu includes prime rib, baked ham with honey glaze, sautéed chicken with a champagne cream sauce and seafood pasta. The buffet is accompanied by pastries, muffins and cheese blintz, several vegetable selections, salad bar and dessert table. Cost is $27.50 for adults and $18.50 for children. Reservations are necessary and can be made by calling (317) 843-9850. » “Easter Frog” author at Borders – Author Gabe Washburn, who wrote the children’s book, “The Easter Frog,” will be at the Borders book store, 13145 Levinson Lane, Noblesville, at 11 a.m. April 3 for a book signing. “The Easter Frog” is a story about Jimmy Fliez, who interviewed for the job of Easter bunny and nearly got the job.

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Photos courtesy of Beef & Boards Dinner Theatre

(Above) Chicago's Jefferson Award winning actress Iris Lieberman stars as the matchmaking Dolly Levi. (Inset) Tori Hicks portrays fashionconscious Irene Molloy, owner the hat shop.

By Zach Dunkin Current in Noblesville If you attend the current run of “Hello, Dolly” at Beef & Boards Dinner Theatre through May 2, you will see Noblesville all over the stage. Irene Molloy in blue. Ernestine Money in yellow. Dolly Levi in red. Dolly Levi in purple. No, the actresses portraying these characters in the Tony Award-winning musical aren’t from Noblesville. But the incredible and colorful designs they are wearing are creations of the theater’s resident costume designer, Brian Horton of Noblesville. In all, six ladies in the cast wear 17 dresses and nine different hats. The guys are decked out, too, in 29 different outfits and 17 hats and caps. That’s 46 costumes total. That doesn’t include six parasols and those hats on display at Irene Molloy’s hat shop.

Current in Noblesville

Horton, who has been at Beef & Boards for more than 20 years as an actor and designer, says this show’s era is his favorite time period to costume, and he uses authentic patterns to inspire his creations. “The costumes make all the difference in the world,” noted Doug Stark, theater owner. “If Whistler’s mother had been wearing a polka dot dress, the painting wouldn’t have had the same effect.” Successful costumes, Stark added, “take us to the period that’s intended to help in the creation of the character, and establish the illusion of the time.” “Costumes not only set the period, they set the feeling, and they give the actor that added element to take them into another character.” See At Play on Page 14 for information. Visit www. currentnoblesville.com for more costumes.

March 30, 2010 | 11


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Noblesville author anxious about second national release By Zach Dunkin Current in Noblesville If someone in Hollywood ever decides to make a Western movie out of Larry Sweazy’s paperback character, Josiah Wolfe, Texas Ranger, the author has a suggestion for who would play Josiah. Matt Damon. “Matt Damon can say a lot without saying anything,” explained Sweazy, a longtime Noblesville resident. “There are few actors who can do that. Sweazy Josiah Wolfe is a lot like that.” But before some Hollywood mogul notices his work like someone did fellow Spur Award winner Tom Cobb’s out of print novel “Crazy Heart,” Sweazy has some more writing to do. On the heels of the surprisingly successful debut of “The Rattlesnake Season,” the first of at least four paperbacks in the Josiah Wolfe, Texas Ranger series, comes “The Scorpion Trail ($5.99, Berkeley Books), ” scheduled for national distribution April 6. The book will be available in all major and independent bookstores, Wal-Mart, Walgreen and grocery stores and through online outlets such as Amazon.com. Amazed by the acceptance of his initial novel – it’s in its fourth printing -- Sweazy is anxious to see how readers will respond to his sopho-

BOok signings April 6, 6-8 p.m. – Big Hat Books, 6510 Cornell Ave., Indianapolis, (317) 202-0203. April 10, 1-3 p.m. – Mudsock Books & Curiosity Shoppe, 11631 Fishers Station Dr., Fishers, (317) 317-579-9822. April 12, 7-8 p.m. – Glendale Branch, Indianpolis-Marion County Public Library, 6101 N. Keystone Ave., Indianapolis, (317) 275-4410. April 17, noon-3 p.m. – Barnes & Noble, 17090 Mercantile Blvd., Noblesville, (317) 773-7952.

more effort. “You don't have to read the first one before the second because there's enough that carries over and brings you up to date," said Sweazy, 2005 Western Writers of America Spur Award winner for Best Short Story. One thing we do know is that, like Jack Bauer in “24,” Josiah Wolfe will survive some close calls to finish out the series. "The challenge is to create that tension," explained Sweazy, who is almost done with book No. 3. "We know Josiah isn't going to die but no one else is sacred."

Happy kids = happy trails COMMENTARY By Tracy Line Long ago, my husband and I loaded our two children into the mini-van and followed a herd of Hoosiers to Florida for Spring Break. Boy were we naïve. By 5 p.m. our cooped-up kids were whining and so were we. Fast forward 10 years and you’ll find we’ve added another kid to the mix, and that we now have a few travel tricks up our sleeves. If you’re one of the many families heading out for Spring Break next week, try these tips for making kids’ travel time a good time. • Keep ‘em busy. Travel involves waiting; little ones don’t wait well. Bring music or books on CD from the library, DVDs from Redbox (returnable at any Redbox anywhere) or puzzles and games along to help time pass. Plan travel around your children’s schedules and pack healthy snacks to curb whining. And while McDonald’s may not be your favorite, it’s cheap and 20 minutes on one of their playgrounds does wonders for lively children. • Surprise them. One year, I bought “sur-

12 | March 30, 2010

prises” and doled them out to my children every few hours throughout our trip. The kids loved it, and knowing they’d get another surprise soon helped them develop patience. Ideas for surprises include games, notebooks, markers, stickers, CDs, candy or small toys. I learned to hold back an item or two for emergencies; a pack of fruit-striped gum once provided great entertainment in an unbearable traffic jam. • Be Prepared…for anything! We’ve had our share of vacation-related carsickness, ear infections, flat tires, delayed flights, and trips to the emergency room. I’ve learned the hard way to travel with Tylenol, paper towels, band-aids, wet wipes, Swim Ear and my doctor’s phone number. Be prepared and when things go awry, have patience. While never funny at the time, vacation disasters make great stories! Tracy Line is a travel agent for Family Vacations in Noblesville, and also a travel writer. Contact her at (317) 770-2211, ext. 312, or Tracy @ familyvacations.com.

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Views | Community | Anti-Aging | Dough | Diversions | Education | Lifestyle | Inside & Out | Pets | Laughs | Puzzles | Classifieds Where I Dine

RESTaurant

Abby drumm

nickel plate bar and grill

Server at Ben & Arni’s

Better chocolate makes for a much better mousse I have loved this dessert since I was a little girl at my grandmother’s dinner table. To my sister and me, chocolate mousse with whipped cream and chocolate shavings on top was always the most lavish of desserts. We loved that it came in its own little dish – “especially for you!”

By Molly Herner Current in Noblesville Who says you can’t make delectable chocolate mousse yourself? Once only a specialty of French restaurants, chocolate mousse was introduced to American home cuisine in the 1960s. It’s a desert that is simple to make, and can even even be prepared days before a dinner party. Remember, the better chocolate you use, the better tasting your end result will be. The word mousse is derived from the French word mousse which means “later” or “foam.”

Molly Herner, is the baker/pastry chef at Matteo’s Ristorante Italiano. You may email her at odette05@ aol.com.

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Why do you like Panera? I mostly like it because it wins in the areas of vegetables and vegetarian foods, which most places aren’t all that keen on.

8654 E. 116th St., Fishers Phone: (317) 841-2888 Web site: www.nickelplatebarandgrill.com Hours: 11 a.m.- close Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-midnight Sunday.

17177 Mercantile Boulevard (317) 773-7261 panerabread.com

3. While the mixture cools for 10 minutes, whip the egg whites until they form very stiff peaks. 4. When the chocolate has cooled stir in the cognac or brandy and then fold in the egg white a bit at a time. Do not overwork the mixture or it will be too liquid. 5. Pour the mousse into individual glass dishes or ramikens and whip some heavy cream to go on top. 6. Let the mousse sit at least overnight or for two days before serving.

Now That You’re Retired Isn’t It Time For You To Fulfill Your Lifelong Dreams?

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What do you like to order there? I get vegetarian soups and their bread because bread is awesome.

Get Ready For Spring Break 2010 at

chocolate mousse Ingredients: • 10 tablespoons of unsalted butter • 6 ounces of chocolate chips • 8 eggs, separated • 1/4 cup of cognac or vanilla brandy • Whipping cream Directions: 1. Melt the chocolate chips over a double boiler with the butter. Let it combine until smooth and shiny and then remove it from heat. 2. Add egg yolks one at a time, stirring thoroughly after each yolk.

Where do you like to eat? Panera.

Nickel Plate Bar and Grill, appropriately planted next to the former Nickel Plate Railroad tracks in Fishers, opened as Parks Place Saloon way back in 1880, and is still serving the residents of Hamilton County tasty food more than 100 years later. Start your meal with tasty, deep fried wedges of macaroni and cheese, served alongside creamy ranch dressing, or a hefty bowl of Nickel Plate’s allegedly world-famous Hobo Stew. If anything says “homestyle,” it’s this combination of chunky, slow-roasted beef with carrots, onions, green peppers, celery, and tomatoes. The award-winning, pork tenderloin -- voted best in the state by Indy Men’s Magazine -- is a safe choice. Try something a little lighter, perhaps, like the veggie melt, a seasoned blend of spinach, cream cheese, and artichokes with red onions on grilled rye bread. Nickel Plate offers a full-service bar, private dining area, family area, and an all-season patio for year-round enjoyment.

Get Ready For

Spring Break

1198 North 10th Street Noblesville, Indiana 46060 317-773-5080

2010

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THEATRE

THEATRE You Can’t Take It With You

Hello Dolly!

Love is in the air in the 10-time Tony Award winning musical , “Hello Dolly,” March 25 through May 2 at the Beef & Boards Dinner Theater, 9301 N. Michigan Road, Indianapolis. Based on the play “The Matchmaker” by Thornton Wilder, “Hello Dolly” is the story of turn-ofthe-century matchmaker Dolly Levi, who is supposed to be arranging a match for the wealthy Horace Vandergelder, but would rather keep him to herself. Tickets range from $35 to $58, and a buffet dinner, coffee and tea. For reservations, call (317) 872- 9664 between 10 a.m. and 7 p.m. Tuesday through Sunday and from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Mondays. For complete show schedule, visit www.beefandboards.com.

Disney’s Aladdin Jr.

Beef & Boards Dinner Theatre’s Pyramid Players presents “Disney’s Aladdin Jr., the stage adaptation of the popular Disney movie as their first Live Theatre for Kids series, April 10, 17 and 23-24 These one-hour shows take place on Fridays at 10 a.m. and again on Saturdays at 10 a.m. and 1 p.m. Adam Crowe, formerly of Noblesville, plays the Sultan. The audience has the opportunity to meet the cast after each show for pictures and autographs.Performances are for all ages, but offered particularly for children in preschool through sixth grade. All tickets are $12.50 and include a snack. For reservations, contact the box office at (317) 872-9664.

A wealthy, conservative family is thrust into a household of eccentric characters, each pursuing their own version of happiness in the Pulitzer Prize-winning “You Can’t Take It With You,” at The Belfry Theatre, 10690 Greenfield Ave., April 9 through April 25. When the manufacture of fireworks in the basement goes awry and an explosion occurs, the police arrive and haul everyone off to jail.  Performances begin at 8 p.m. April 9-10, 16-17 and 23-24 and at 2 p.m. April 17 and 25. Tickets are $15 for adults and $12 for ages 12 and younger. Reservations required. Call (317) 773-1085.

Crimes of the Heart

This 1981 Pulitzer Prize-winning story of three sisters gathering to await news of their ailing grandfather will be presented at the Carmel Community Playhouse at Clay Terrace from April 15-25. Ticket prices are $15 for general admission and $12 for students and seniors. For more information, visit www.carmelplayers.org. 

SPECIAL EVENTS Follow the North Star

Become a fugitive slave on the Underground Railroad, fleeing from captivity, risking everything for freedom during “Follow the North Star” at Conner Prairie, 13400 Allisonville Road, Fishers. The 90-minute program begin at 7:30 p.m. through 8:30 p.m. on April 9-10, 16-17, 23-24. Cost is $19 per person and reservations are required, by calling (317) 776-6006.

The following musical acts will be playing live at Mickey’s Irish Pub,13644 N Meridian, Carmel. For more information, call 317-573-9746: April 2 – Henry Lee Summer and Friends April 3 – Wooly Bullies April 9 – Endless Summer April 10 – Lemon Wheel Band

Mo’s Irish Pub

The following musical acts will be playing live at Mo’s Irish Pub, 13193 Levinson Lane in the Hamilton Town Center, Noblesville. For more information, call (317) 770-9020. April 1 – Lady Di & The King April 2 – Daniel Joseph Band April 8 – Greta Speaks April 9 – Lou Abby April 10 – Through Being Cool

Hedgehog Music Showcase

The Radio Review at Hedgehog Music Showcase, 101 W. Main St., Arcadia, takes the form of a live radio show featuring big band, swing and pop standards of the 1920s-30s-40s performed by musicians and vocalists 8 p.m. every Saturday. For more information, call (317) 573-9746:

Just In Time For Spring!

An Education

Come experience how your guests will feel being welcomed by the grandest of entries. Granite kitchen countertops, lavish baths and closets, home theater. With over 6,000 sq. ft, there’s plenty of space for pool table and workout area in the lower level. Located in the prestigious Brookside subdivision just north of Bridgewater Country Club.

PG-13, 95 minutes

14 | March 30, 2010

Mickey’s Irish Pub

A.M. REAL ESTATE Brookside Subdivision

Capt. Critic’s DVD pick

A good though not great film, “An Education” will be most remembered as the coming-out party for Carey Mulligan. Previously a virtual unknown, she delivered a career-launching performance -- and earned an Oscar nomination -- in this drama about a young English girl who gets caught up in a whirlwind of romance with a dubious character in 1961 London. Although the film didn’t light any fires in its theatrical run, movie lovers are poised to discover Mulligan’s nuanced, layered turn as “An Education” hits video stores. Mulligan plays Jenny, a working-class girl whose entire existence seems to revolve around meeting her parents’ expectations that she get into Oxford. She dreams of escaping her bourgeois confines and seeing the world, and meeting people “who know lots about lots.” One day she meets David (Peter Sarsgaard), who represents everything she desires: He wears sleek suits, drives a rare sports car, goes to mod parties and whisks her off to Paris for romantic getaways. Though at least twice her age, the charismatic David convinces Jenny’s parents (Alfred Molina and Cara Seymour) to condone the affair. As Jenny edges closer to ditching her future

LIVE MUSIC

Proudly offered by A. M. Home Rentals for a monthly rental in the 3’s. Contact Jim Canull for a private viewing. 507-4431. Photo by Kerry Brown, Courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics

Carey Mulligan (left) as Jenny, Peter Sarsgaard as David in “An Education.”

• • • • • • •

– despite the warnings of her English teacher (Olivia Williams) and headmistress (Emma Thompson) -- some cracks appear in the attractive pedestal upon which David is placing her. Danish director Lone Scherfig brings an outsider’s touch to this very British tale, showing the allure of both worlds in which Jenny rests a foot. Movie: B Read more of Chris Lloyd’s review of current films and DVD’s at www. captaincritic.blogspot.com or www. TheFilmYap.com.

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DISPATCHES » More public forums scheduled – Members of the Noblesville Board of School Trustees will meet the community to discuss the building projects and the need to replace operating funds lost to state budget cuts and to answer questions. The remaining forums will take place at 6:30 April 14 and April 28 at Noblesville City Hall. For an detail explanation of the plan visit www. noblesvilleschools.com.

HAMILTON 16 IMAX N o b l e s v i l l e / C a r m e l / We s t f i e l d

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Is this proper language for a leader? Probably not, but… COMMENTARY By Hannah Davis As Barack Obama stepped up to the podium last Tuesday before signing the health care overhaul into law, he got an ear-full. The microphone just barely caught it, but listen closely and you’ll hear it: “This is a big [expletive] deal.” Oh, no. Joe Biden, you’ve done it again. This has to be the high point in Biden’s long history of verbal gaffes. A year ago, while supporting a $1.3 billion investment in train stations and rail lines, the error-prone vice president was apparently unCURRENT aware of a near-by microphone, and when one TUESDAY of his former Senate colleagues called him “Mr. Vice President,”MARCH he replied30 with what is reportedly one of his favorite phrases. Let’s just say its KEEP SAME SIZE terminology was similar to his recent slip-up. Professional? Sophisticated? Uh, well, no. That one naughty word has earned Biden a perceived personality akin to a someone’s drunk uncle at a wedding. Not exactly ideal for a man who’s supposed to be running our country. Let’s focus on the positives, though: Biden has yet to do any damage, and I get the impression that both he and Obama are genuinely good, kind-hearted people. Normal people.

HANNA’S UNOFFICIAL JOE BIDEN POLL Were you offended by Vice President Joe Biden’s use of an expletive prior to the signing of the health care bill? Yes: 30 percent No: 50 percent No, but it was inappropriate: 20 percent (20 students polled) People who, though ultimately at a higher level than the rest of us, are just like us. And at last check, normal people use some fiery words on a fairly regular basis. Yes, Biden has a history. But as far as political screw-ups go, I’d rather they involve phraseology than politics.

Hannah Davis is a senior at Noblesville High School and the opinions editor for The Mill Stream.

Exp. 4-13-10

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March 30, 2010 | 15


Views | Community | Anti-Aging | Dough | Diversions | Education | Lifestyle | Inside & Out | Pets | Laughs | Puzzles | Classifieds

One thing leads to another, and another COMMENTARY By Darla Kinney Scoles Recently, while researching genealogy blogs, I was intrigued by an ad at the bottom of an e-magazine article. Having just written about celebrities who find they are linked to figures in American History, I had such things on my mind. The ad, an eBay prompt, featured (no surprise here) items of interest to those involved in family history work. The featured items up for bid included “Stonewall Jackson grandparents history and genealogy,” “1929 Genealogy Chase Family – Declaration of Independence,” and “Huge Northern Virginia Genealogy Lot.” Stonewall Jackson got me thinking. Really. My husband, it seems, is related to American History as well. In his mother’s lineage one will find General George Armstrong Custer as a nottoo-distant relative. If Stonewall was available on ebay, why not Custer? I was thinking that purchasing some historical literature and doing additional research on Custer might be fun, having previously done the same for our cowboy-evangelist ancestor and finding it enlightening. So, I took the bait and did a search.

Indeed, Custer was up for bid in a big way. Custer offerings numbered in the hundreds and ranged from a $1 paperback book on his life to a Custer-signed endorsement dated 1864 for $4,000 – all subject to the bidding wars, of course. The lot included postcards, portraits, DVDs, a flag, a plastic action figure, a rare fountain pen and even a Civil War Custer mouse pad. My curiosity now piqued, I searched Google Images to see Custer what sort of free Custer art I might find. That search also revealed a plethora of items, as well as a link to a blog (full circle?) in which a science-math inclined blogger noted that if one simply “does the math” based on population numbers alone, we are all likely linked to someone famous somewhere in our lineage. Oh. Darla Kinney Scoles is a freelance journalist living in Noblesville. Her most recent work involves the creation of “Stories,” an individualized writing service helping people get their personal histories down on paper. Contact her at darlakinneyscoles@gmail.com

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P5999

‘06 LEXUS IS250 ‘07 ‘07 LEXUS LEXUSES350 ES350

P5994 P5992A...........................................................

‘07 LEXUS ES350 ‘06 LEXUS LEXUSES350 LS430 ‘07 $ WHITE W/IVORY LEATHER AND ONLY 58K MILES! 10795A . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW $24,988 MOONLIGHT W/IVORY LEATHER AND JUST 47K MILES! 10701A ...................................................... NOW $

MOONSHELLW/GRAYLEATHERANDFACTORYNAVIGATION! P5992A........................................................... NOW ‘07 ‘07 LEXUS LEXUS ES350 RX350

$$ ‘06 LEXUS LS430 BLUE P5989 ...................................................................... SILVERW/IVORY W/BLACKLEATHER LEATHERAND ANDJUST JUST40K45KMILES! MI! FACTORY NAVIGATION! L6003 .................... NOW NOW 27,435 32,995

W/IVORY ES350 LEATHER AND JUST 47K MILES! 10701A ...................................................... NOW 31,988 ‘07 LEXUS ‘08 MOONLIGHT LEXUS ES350 $

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16 | March 30, 2010

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‘07 ‘08

‘08 LEXUS RX400H P5957............................................................................... NOW $49,995 SILVERW/BLACKLEATHERANDJUST40KMILES! 10826A..................

L5981......................................... P6002

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P5988

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WHITE W/IVORY LEATHER AND 23KNAVIGATION! MILES! BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND NAVIGATION! 10880A . . . . . . . . . . .P6004 . . . SUPERCHARGED! . . . . . . . . . . . . .. .. .. . . . . . .. . .P6007 . . . . . . . .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .... . . . . . . . .NOW DESERT ROSE W/BLACK LEATHER ANDONLY FACTORY . NOW

‘07 VOLKSWAGEN AUDI 2.0T A4 NEW QUATTRO ‘08 BEETLE

P5957............................................................................... 10777A

33,985 13,995 20,995

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$ ‘08 REDCHEVROLET W/IVORY LEATHER AND ONLY 23KIMPALA MILES! P6032 . . . . . . . . . . . .SS . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 26,995

$ DESERT ROSE W/BLACK LEATHER AND FACTORY ‘09 PONTIAC G8 GTNAVIGATION! SUPERCHARGED! P6007. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 20,995

$ ‘07 BLACK AUDI 2.0T A4 QUATTRO W/BLACK LEATHER AND ONLY 19K MILES! 10799A . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 27,495 RED W/IVORY LEATHER AND ONLY 23K MILES!

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$

26,995

‘07 WRANGLER ‘09 JEEP PONTIAC G8 GT SAHARA UNLIMITED

27,995 27,495

$$ 4 DOOR, LIKE NEW! 18KAND MILES! . . . . . . . . . . . .10799A . . . . . . . . . .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..................................... .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. NOW BLACK4WD, W/BLACK LEATHER ONLYP6020 19K. . MILES! . NOW

‘07 JEEP WRANGLER SAHARA UNLIMITED 4 DOOR, 4WD, LIKE NEW! 18K MILES! P6020. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW

‘04 LEXUS MERCEDES-BENZ E55 AMG ‘08 LS600H L C300 MERCEDES-BENZ

$

27,995

WHITE W/TAN LEATHER AND ALL WHEEL DRIVE! ONLY 30K MILES! 10777A. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 29,988 ‘04 MERCEDES-BENZ E55 AMG ‘08 BMW 335CI $ ‘08 DESERT MERCEDES-BENZ ROSE W/ BLACK LEATHER AND FACTORY NAVIGATION!C300 SUPERCHARGED! P6002 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW $28,995 BLUE W/TAN LEATHER AND LOADED W/OPTIONS! 15K MILES! 10753A . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 46,995 $ 4-MATIC, BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND LOADED! 19K MILES! P5987. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 32,995 ‘08 CADILLAC CTS4 BLUE W/TAN LEATHER AND ONLY 53K MILES! 10280A . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW

39,995

$$

$ W/TAN LEATHER AND ALL3.0SI WHEEL DRIVE! ONLY 30K MILES! 10777A. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 29,988 ‘07 WHITE BMW X5

$ ‘08 MERCEDES-BENZ C300 BLUE W/TAN LEATHER AND ONLY 53K MILES! 10280A . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 39,995 BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND LOADED! 19K MILES! P5987. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 32,995 ‘08 4-MATIC, BMW 335CI St. | Indianapolis $

4610 E. 96th ‘07 BMW X5 3.0SI

$ 46,995 39,995 (888) 774-7738 BMW 335CI $ BLUE W/TANwww.tomwoodlexus.com LEATHER AND LOADED W/OPTIONS! 15K MILES! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 46,995 BLUE W/TAN LEATHER AND LOADED W/OPTIONS! 15K MILES! 10753A. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW$

‘08

BLUE W/TAN LEATHER AND ONLY 53K MILES! 10280A . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 10753A

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IS-5623096.INDD IS-5623096.INDD

PROOF O.K. BY: __________________________________________________

Current in Noblesville

O.K. WITH CORRECTIONS BY:_____________________________

PLEASE READ CAREFULLY • SUBMIT CORRECTIONS ONLINE ADVERTISER: TOM WOOD LEXUS SALES PERSON: Alan Judkins

83,995 28,995 32,995

$$

SMOKEY GRANITEW/BLACK LEATHERAND ONLY MI! FLAGSHIP LUXURY DESERT ROSE W/ BLACK LEATHER AND FACTORY NAVIGATION! . . . NOW$ 4-MATIC, BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND8KLOADED! 19KSUPERCHARGED! MILES!HYBRID! P5987. . P6002 . . 10826A.................. . . . . . . .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..NOW NOW

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$ W GRAY LEATHER AND JUST 53K MI! FACTORY & DUAL HEADREST P5999 ............. NOW ‘07 BLUE LEXUS LS460 LNAVIGATION SMOKEY GRANITEW/BLACK LEATHERAND ONLY 8K MI! FLAGSHIP LUXURY HYBRID!DVD’S 10826A.................. NOW 42,995 83,995

‘07 LS460 ‘04 LEXUS MERCEDES-BENZ E55 AMG $ 33,985 SMOKEYGRANITEW/BLACKLEATHERANDONLY8KMI!FLAGSHIPLUXURYHYBRID! NOW$ 83,995 31,988 SMOKEY GRANITE W/GRAY ANDNAVIGATION! ONLY 40K SUPERCHARGED! MILES! 13,995 DESERT ROSE W/ BLACK LEATHERLEATHER AND FACTORY . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 43,988 28,995 LEXUS RX350 ‘07 LEXUS LS460 L VOLKSWAGEN NEW BEETLE CADILLAC CTS4 TOM WOOD‘08 SELECT $ $ SILVER W/BLACK LEATHER JUST 45K MI! FACTORY NOW 32,995 SILVERW/BLACK LEATHERAND 40K MILES! BLUE W/TAN LEATHER ANDAND AUTOMATIC! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NAVIGATION! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..................... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 16,495 WHITE W/TAN LEATHER AND ALLJUST WHEEL DRIVE! ONLY 30K MILES! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW 49,995 29,988

BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND ONLY 19K MILES! 10799A . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW $

RedUCed 5875 doveRTon dR $137,900 Mls# 2847683

‘07 SILVERW/BLACK LEXUS LS460 AWD,GLACIER FROSTW/BLACK JUST 26K MILES! FACTORY NAVIGATION! P6038 LEATHERAND JUSTLEATHERAND 40K MILES! P5957...............................................................................

SMOKEY GRANITE W/GRAY LEATHER AND ONLY ‘07 LEXUS GX470 ‘08 LEXUS LS600H L 40K MILES! L5981......................................... NOW$

$ WHITE W/IVORY LEATHER AND ONLY 23K MILES! P6004. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW $ MOONLIGHT AND JUST 47K. . . .MILES! NOW BLACK W/BLACKW/IVORY LEATHER LEATHER AND NAVIGATION! 10880A . . . . . . . . . . . .10701A . . . . . . . . . ....................................................... . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW

REDW/TAN W/IVORY LEATHER ONLY 23K MILES! . NOW BLUE LEATHER ANDAND AUTOMATIC! P5988. . . . .P6032 . . . . . . . .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..................................... .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. NOW

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37,495 43,988 42,995 ....NOW NOW $39,650 49,995 $

BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND JUST 23K MILES! 10873A............................................................ NOW ‘07 LEXUS GS350 ‘07 LEXUS LS460 L $

‘06 LS430 ‘04 LEXUS BUICK RENDEZVOUS ULTRA AWD

‘04 BUICK RENDEZVOUS ULTRA AWD

It’s A Great Time To Be

10892A....................... 10873A............................................................

$ WHITEW/IVORYLEATHERANDJUST9KMI!STILLUNDERLEXUSFACTORYWARRANTIES! 10737C.................... NOW NOW $ $ SMOKEY GRANITE W/GRAY LEATHER AND ONLY 40K MILES! L5981.........................................

$ $ TOM WOOD‘08 SELECT MOONSHELLW/GRAY LEATHERAND FACTORY NAVIGATION! P5992A........................................................... NOW 28,300 BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND JUST 23K MILES! 10873A............................................................ NOW 42,995 ‘08 LEXUS ES350 LEXUS LS600H L

‘09 CHEVROLET PONTIAC G8IMPALA GT $ ‘08 SS BLACK W/BLACK LEATHER AND NAVIGATION! 10880A. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . NOW $13,995

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RedUCed

31,988 28,300

‘10 LEXUS HS250H ‘07 ‘08 LEXUS LEXUS LS460 RX400H

PROOF DUE: -

NEXT RUN DATE: 03/20/10

www.youarecurrent.com


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March 30, 2010 | 17


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Much to do about mulch COMMENTARY By Holly Funk It’s that time of year when mountains of mulch pile up in suburban driveways. Scooping servings of it into wheelbarrows, people cruise it around to their designated mulched areas. It looks nice and (I think) it smells nice, but you might not know just how great it really is for your garden. Mulch retains moisture, discourages weeds and eventually breaks down to improve the texture and fertility of the soil. With so many different types available, it’s hard to know which is best. But it really depends on your purpose and how much you want to spend. Mulch can be purchased either bagged or bulk. There are benefits to both, such as bagged can be saved outside in the rain and a pile must have a tarp. The convenience of having a load of mulch delivered usually carries a hefty fee. Shop around for the best price and always see what you are buying before you purchase it. Several materials are used as mulch. Chipped trees and limbs are the most common, as in Cypress, Pine Bark and my favorite, Hardwood mulch. Some mulch is available artificially enhanced with red or black dye but over time it fades and looks particularly awful, especially the red. (hint, hint)

Other materials used to make mulch are pine needles, which make the soil a little more acidic; cocoa shells, which smell nice and have a nice color but blow and wash away easily; pebbles, for a decorative touch and believe it or not, newspaper makes an excellent weed barrier. Just top with a layer of mulch. Common landscape debris can be used as mulch, and it’s free. Do you have lots of leaves at the end of the season? Those leaves can be shredded and used as mulch. If you have a compost pile, you can use compost as mulch and that is ultimately the best thing you can do for your soil and your gardens. What luck… it is free. Apply mulch to a thickness of about three inches, keeping it away from the base of plants and trees. Piling mulch around the base risks the health of the plant or tree as the damp, dark areas make it susceptible to insect damage, fungal problems and root rot. Reapply mulch one to two times per year, as needed. Merry mulching! Holly Funk is an Indiana accredited horticulturist and advanced master gardener residing in Noblesville. Email your gardening woes (or wisdom) to hollyfunk75@yahoo.com.

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Surrendering your pet should be a last resort

DISPATCHES » Hairy situation – Pet hair can make furniture and rugs unsightly. In order to keep your furry friend’s hair under wraps, store a pet-hair-removal tool, like GHRI fave Scotch Fur Fighter ($10; furfighter. com), in a living room drawer or cabinet. It will be handy for frequent use. -Good Housekeeping   » Koi ponds – With spring here, you may be considering some landscaping – even a koi pond – in the coming weeks.  The ideal set-up for koi is a pond of at least 1,000 gallons with a smooth gravel substrate, rocks, and hearty plants. A good pond for koi will be at least three to four feet deep. Here, koi will find the cooler water they need during the warm summer months. Keep in mind, though, that koi ownership is a long-term commitment; koi can live a very long time: 25 to 35 years on average, but more than 100 years is possible. - www.peteducation.com 

easter

COMMENTARY By Rebecca Stevens We call them “owner releases” and they have increased significantly at the Humane Society of Hamilton County over the last 3 years. These pets are surrendered to us by their owners for a variety of reasons—some of which are very legitimate, most of which could have been completely avoided, and then there are those where there is no doubt the animal is better off in our care. One of the most popular reasons people give up their pets is because they are moving. Now, I understand that in some cases one doesn’t have a choice on where they can afford to live and that pets may not be allowed. However, we find that many of the pets we receive due to a move are a result of poor planning. There are ample apartments and landlords out there who do allow pets, so please check first. Financial hardship has also been a common theme. The silent victims of today’s economy are definitely family pets. The Humane Society does, however, offer free pet food to those in need as donations are available. We’re more than

happy to work with someone to build a plan on how to keep their pet in the home during these difficult times. And lastly, there is behavior. Things like “my dog jumps on the kids,” “ she doesn’t get along with my other pet,” “my cat potties outside the litter box,” etc. And remarkably, when we ask many of these folks if they have ever done any obedience training or sought veterinary assistance to rule out a medical condition, the answer is “no.” If you’re having difficulty potty-training a pet, or they are demonstrating behaviors you dislike, please ask for help. There are numerous resources out there including the Humane Society that can offer free assistance and solutions. Surrendering your pet to the local shelter should always be an absolute last resort. Rebecca Stevens is executive director of the Humane Society for Hamilton County . You may contact her with questions, solutions and story suggestions at hamiltonhumane@ yahoo.com.

We’re more than happy to work with someone to build a plan on how to keep their pet in the home during these difficult times.

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Technology always gets the best of me

Answers to INDIANA WORDSMITH CHALLENGE: BONE, BOON, EBON, OBOE, BOO, EON, NOB, ONE, BE, EN, NO, ON Answers to BUILD THE WORDS: PAULA DEEN, CHECKERS, CHARLES SCHULTZ, BULLDOGS, TALLAHASSEE Answers to HOOSIER HODGEPODGE: Shades: AZURE, CYAN, INDIGO, NAVY, SKY, TEAL; Movies: ENVY, GREENBERG, MYSTERY MEN, REALITY BITES, ZOOLANDER; Companies: ANTHEM, CONSECO, LINCOLN F R E T M A R C U S U R P O R E O N O T E R E U R O NATIONAL, R E E F D U E T O A S I F SAFECO; T H E F I N A L F O U R Mannings: E M S I R E F A T P E E P F I N N P A L E ARCHIE, ELI, O R B S A R A B L E P A N PEYTON; L U C A S O I L S T A D I U M Swords: EPEE, E K E S A D S U S A G E S I O T A P A N E M E M O FOIL; Terminal: E S P S E X H E W WEIR COOK M B O S O R E H A A R E N

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you which three. So you download a different program and start all over again. And get exactly the same result. The worst problems, in terms of annoyance, are the browser hijackers. These are programs that do exactly as the name implies. You search for something – anti-virus software, let’s say – but when you click on an entry, the hijacker sends you to something else entirely, often as not a bogus search engine or a site you wouldn’t want the pastor to catch you visiting. And hijackers have proved nearly impossible for me to remove. I am sure there is an 8-year-old computer wizard kid out there who could fix this in a jiffy and then scoff at my predicament as mere child’s play. Well, let him scoff. After all, he’s a child and I’m not. And that is why I decided to go ahead and buy the computers I had already been planning on buying in a couple months, anyway. Which does lead me back to the question of where all this malware originates. It’s just a guess, but I think the computer companies may be in on it as a way to create demand. And I wouldn’t be surprised if that 8-year-old wrote the program. Mike Redmond is an author, journalist, humorist and speaker. Write him at mike@ mikeredmondonline.com or P.O. Box 44385, Indianapolis, IN 46244.

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COMMENTARY By Mike Redmond It’s new computer time at my house. Make that computers, plural. I’m getting a new desktop for use in my office, and a new laptop I’ll probably end up using in my office as well. I ordered the laptop for those times when I need a computer for travel. Then I realized I don’t do all that much traveling anymore. Oh well. The reason I am bringing all this new technology into the home is because my old computer has reached the end of its effective life. I’m not complaining. I got seven years’ service out of the old girl. In computer years, that makes her several thousand years old. Let me put it this way: When I bought this computer, it had just replaced the Flintstones model. I have spent the last few years squeezing as much life as I could out of this old computer, adding memory, upgrading whatever needed upgrading, and keeping it clean as a whistle on the inside. But time was not on my side. In other words, it was only a matter of time before something happened to upset the Apple cart (well, actually, it’s a Dell, but whoever heard of a Dell cart?). And that something was an attack of various viruses designed to make my life way more interesting than I had planned. For the last few days, I have done nothing but download and run programs with rather … shall we say aggressive names, all of which promise to send spyware, Trojans, worms and any other type of malware into oblivion: Little Big Horn. Nuclear Blast. Armageddon. And here’s the beauty part: All the malware programs pretty much ignore them! I’m not kidding. You spend three hours running a deep scan of every last electron on your system. The scan then barfs up a list of bad programs (Bad program! Shame on you!) three pages long. You hit the “Fix Problems” button. The computer grinds away for an hour or two. Then it comes back to tell you it got rid of all the problems except for three, but it doesn’t tell

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22 | March 30, 2010

Build the words

49. Clairvoyant’s gift 50. Indiana driver’s license datum 51. Chop down 52. NCAA basketball tournament moniker (2 wds.) 58. Kind of buddy 61. Many millennia 62. Tolstoy’s “The Death of ___ Ilych” 63. Peyton Manning’s post-op time 64. Milieu for Indiana Ice 65. Pianist Peter 66. Market Square ___ 67. Pacers’ Murphy 68. Bite like a beaver on Fall Creek Down 1. Accomplishment 2. Colts’ Joseph Addai play 3. Indiana town between Peru and Wabash 4. Peanut brittle base 5. Bob & Tom time slots, briefly 6. Westfield HS geometry class calculation 7. Orvis fishing department buy 8. Leppert Mortuary purchase 9. Excessive 10. Old Town Tavern drink: Whiskey ___ 11. Eiteljorg Museum tribe 12. Part of AARP: Abbr. 13. Colts or Pacers player, e.g. 21. Levy

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Current in Noblesville

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Solutions on page 21 www.youarecurrent.com


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March 30, 2010 | 23


24 | March 30, 2010

Current in Noblesville

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March 30, 2010  

Current in Noblesville

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