December 27, 2011

PRITCHARD GIVEN KEY / P7 • HAUKE PLEADS GUILTY / P8 • FISHERS ‘SAFEST TOWN’ / P8

Tuesday December 27, 2011

©2011 IU Health 12/11 HY79311_4204 10.375” x 1.25” Front Strip Built at size (100%) Ben Irvin, 25, shown here in full Santa garb,

Fishers resident Ben Irvin turned a no-shaving dare into a community service project for at-risk families / P7

donned for a visit to a downtown children’s shelter.

Photo Illustration

Specialty care that’s as close as it is exceptional. ©2011 IU Health 12/11 HY79311_4204

79311_4204_IUHNRTH_10.375x1.25_4c_SaxonyFrontStrip.indd 1

11/22/11 3:38 PM

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Lap dogs Founded Jan. 25, 2011, at Fishers, IN Vol. I, No. 47 Copyright 2011. Current Publishing, LLC All Rights Reserved.

1 South Range Line Road, Suite 220 Carmel, IN 46032

317.489.4444 Managing Editor – Jordan Fischer jordan@youarecurrent.com / 489.4444 ext. 204 Associate Editor – Terry Anker terry@currentincarmel.com Art Director – Zachary Ross zach@youarecurrent.com / 489.4444 Associate Artist – Andrea Nickas andrea@youarecurrent.com / 489.4444

OUR VIEWS

It is our position that our pets do not belong on our laps while we are driving. They may be cute and cuddly and help keep us warm on these cold winter days, but it is a danger to you, your pet and everyone on the road with you.

The American Automobile Association reports that when a driver turns their attention to something other than the road for just two seconds, they double their risk of an accident. With all of the distractions already on the road, it is not a good idea to have our pets on our laps or able to wander around our cars without some sort of restraint.

We all love our pets, but there is no reason to put everyone in your car and on the road at risk. We can understand how some do not want to crate their pet. The use of harnesses (which can be found for purchase online or at your local pet store) are a good alternative and allow your pet to sit in the backseat in a safe manner. Let your dog be a lap dog at your home, not in your car.

Hoosier customer?

It is our position that certain state supported universities are doing the right thing by capping tuition increases and loosening course credit requirements to facilitate timely graduation from college for Hoosier students.

The welcome changes are occurring in response to tuition cap recommendations from the Indiana Commission for Higher Education, a coordinating agency that works closely with Indiana’s public and independent colleges. The commission made the recommendations as a result of rising tuition increases that are twice the rate of inflation and the resulting debt that delays timely graduation and creates financial hardships for graduates. Indiana State, Indiana and Ball State Universities have recently announced tuition breaks for summer school students – which also allows for better use of their facilities, as well as a reduction in college credits required to graduate. Ball State is even offering a $500 tuition break for Hoosier students who graduate in four years.

Even though these changes are likely occurring due to pressure from the legislature, it’s about time state universities put dynasty building aside and respond to the needs of Hoosier students in the current downside economy. This type of creative thinking is mandatory for colleges to remain a practical and affordable higher education option for Hoosiers.

The views in these editorials are of reader participants. They do not represent those of Current Publishing ownership and management.

Advertising

Sales Executive – Hollie Gossett hollie@youarecurrent.com / 372.8088 Senior Sales Executive – Dennis O’Malia dennis@youarecurrent.com / 370.0749

Business Office

Bookkeeper – Heather Cole heather@youarecurrent.com / 489.4444 Publisher – Brian Kelly brian@youarecurrent.com / 414.7879 General Manager – Steve Greenberg steve@youarecurrent.com / 847.5022 The views of the columnists in Current In Fishers are their own and do not necessarily reflect the positions of this newspaper.

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strange laws V E C TO R BU T TO N S . CO M V E C TO R BU T TO N S . CO M

CONSTITUTION CLOSEUP

Photo Illustration

Our nation has all sorts of arcane, nonsensical laws on the books. Each week, we’ll share one with you.

In Waterboro, Maine, dog leashes may not be over eight feet in length.

Source: dumblaws.com

www.youarecurrent.com

Every week, we will print a portion of the U.S. Constitution, followed by a portion of the Indiana Constitution. We encourage you to benchmark government policies against these bedrock documents. Today: the U.S. Constitution.

Article. I. Section. 6. Clause 2: No Senator or Representative shall, during the Time for which he was elected, be appointed to any civil Office under the Authority of the United States, which shall have been created, or the Emoluments whereof shall have been encreased during such time; and no Person holding any Office under the United States, shall be a Member of either House during his Continuance in Office.

Section. 7. Clause 1: All Bills for raising Revenue shall originate in the

Current in Fishers

House of Representatives; but the Senate may propose or concur with Amendments as on other Bills.

Clause 2: Every Bill which shall have passed the House of Representatives and the Senate, shall, before it become a Law, be presented to the President of the United States; If he approve he shall sign it, but if not he shall return it, with his Objections to that House in which it shall have originated, who shall enter the Objections at large on their Journal, and proceed to reconsider it. If after such Reconsideration two thirds of that House shall agree to pass the Bill, it shall be sent, together with the Objections, to the other House, by which it shall likewise be reconsidered, and if approved by two thirds of that House, it shall become a Law.

December 27, 2011 | 3

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FROM THE BACKSHOP Christmas gifts: Whew, that was close

GRAND OPENING!

NEW YEARS EVE S AT U R DAY D E C EM B ER 3 1 S T

------We have lived in Fishers for 20 years and we love the -------people in our town! One of the things we enjoy most --------is to host our friends & neighbors in our home....We ---------turn off the television, and just talk about life over a ----------drink or a meal. The connections we make during -----------those times are priceless!

Brian Kelly & Steve Greenberg

E 126th St

Alliso nville R

d

River Highlands Roy G Holland Memorial Park

Lantern Rd

• For the “chief executives” and common/ town councils across the county – A reading exercise where everyone is on the same page. (It can happen!)

• For the various summer festivals for which our county is becoming better known – Continued, enthusiastic sponsorship in 2012 from your favorite newspaper moguls.

OK, finish wrapping, get to bed and enjoy the day tomorrow. Merry Christmas.

••• We were fortunate to be included in the opening-night audience for Civic Theatre’s production of Roald Dahl’s Willy Wonka last Friday at The Tarkington. Wow! What a performance that was. Do yourself and your family a favor, and take in a show before it ends on Jan. 7. Tickets may be purchased at www.thecenterfortheperformingarts.org.

------------That’s why we’re opening Hearthstone. We want to ------------provide a place in our home town where our ----------friends and neighbors can comfortably gather --------around the fireplace over a cup of coffee, tea, beer, or -------a meal, and connect with each other.

- Mark & Sandy Goff Owners & Neighbors

HEARTHSTONE

E 116th St

Hague Rd

You hear the stories every year, naturally, about the guys who wait until this close to retail closing time on Christmas Eve to begin – and complete – their shopping. Uh, we came close; not that close, but perilously close. It’s not that the holiday or our families aren’t important to us – trust us, they are – but taking care of “the immediate free world” mostly takes something we haven’t had a lot of around here: time. The in-office holiday season, to speak nothing of our voluminous social engagements (It sounds good, at least, doesn’t it?), has had us pinned deep.

Getting out to shop hadn’t been much of an option, because we napped in our spare time – usually when the stores were closed.

No one should feel sorry for us, because we got it all done. And before you accuse us of taking to the World Wide Web, think again.

We’re storefront shoppers, preferring to give to those in our midst items you can’t buy in an indoor human traffic jam. We support local business whenever possible, and we did that in the nick of time. We also picked up “little somethings” for those outside our families. Allow us to clue you in: • For The Center for the Performing Arts – Full houses all across the campus.

• For Hamilton County Highway Dept.

– Clearing thoroughfares roads of snow without pummeling residents’ mailboxes to plastic pulp.

Fishers Cheeney Creek Natural Area

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Women in office Commentary

By Terry Aker Former Presidential hopeful Herman Cain’s purported dalliances have been well publicized and lines of political contention have been drawn. It is the nature of the process of vetting our would-be leaders. But is there any other benefit that we can extract from this painful and often gory method?

The obvious message to many (if it is not abundantly apparent, I strongly encourage another look) is to conduct one’s personal life with some degree of restraint. Playing duck-duck-goose around the office with someone else’s spouse is not going to remain a secret – ever. And, no matter how strict the confidentiality agreement, someone, given the right incentive, will talk.

But is there more here? Does this case speak to the subtle work-place politics that continue to keep women under the glass ceiling and out of the White House?

If I stay late alone with and then buy dinner for a male subordinate, I am lauded as hard working and respectful. If I stay late alone with

and then buy dinner for a female subordinate, distinctly different perceptions are created. One executive recently announced to a group of our peers a policy of never closing his office door with a female underling. I asked the group if this would limit women’s opportunity to advance. Doesn’t trust come from intimacy and shared confidentiality? If I can express with Joe my secret plan to acquire the company but not with Jane, doesn’t Joe have an advantage? If a solution to prospective transgression is to restrict access, can we ever find parity?

Of all the bigotry that has plagued humanity, is gender bias the most pernicious? Does our fear of one’s misunderstanding our intentions or actions prevent us from achieving a higher level of interaction? If in fact we are different, how can we be the same?

Doesn’t trust come from intimacy and shared confidentiality?

4 | December 27, 2011

Terry Anker is an associate editor of Current Publishing, LLC. You may e-mail him at terry@ currentincarmel.com.

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DISPATCHES » Trinity Weslyan to promote community health/fitness – Trinity Weslyan Church will be offering a free, four-week health and fitness course taught by local physicians and health professionals beginning Jan. 11 at 6:30 p.m., and continuing each Wednesday thereafter. The course will cover heart health, exercise, nutrition and emotional health. Beginning Jan. 25, the church will also offer free Zumba classes for participants 13-and-up. Courses will be held at Trinity Weslyan Church, 9709 Allisonville Rd., Fishers. For more information, or to register, visit the Web site at www.trinityweslyan.com. » Fishers Fun Guide now available – The Fishers Parks & Recreation Winter/ Spring 2012 Fun Guide is now available online at www.fishers.in.us/parks. Hard copies are available at Fishers Train Station Welcome Center at 11601 Municipal Dr, at Fishers Town Hall at 1 Municipal Dr, and at the Fishers Parks & Recreation offices at 11565 Brooks School Rd. Summer camp registration begins Mark 1. For more information, visit the website or call (317) 595-3150. » Stewards of Children training – Chaucie’s Place will present Darkness to Light’s Stewards of Children Child Sexual Abuse Prevention Training on Tuesday, Jan. 24, from 6-8:30 p.m. at Westfield Police Dept., 17535 Dartown Rd., Westfield. Cost is $15 per adult; no one under the age of 18 is permitted to attend. Registration is available online at chauciesplace.org, or via phone at 317-759-8008.

Holiday goal: Survive the holidays COMMENTARY

By Danielle Wilson I got a new job! And so did my husband! And thanks to both of these majorly stressful life changes (and the stupid timing of the holidays), we are ready to kill each other! Maybe “kill” is too strong a word, but maiming to the point of incapacity has crossed my mind on several occasions during the last two weeks. Here’s the skinny: Both opportunities presented themselves literally within one week of each other, which meant we were interviewing, negotiating contracts and resigning from our current jobs at the same time. And while this definitely was a good kind of stress, it was stress nonetheless. And because we were both so caught up in our own employment insanity, we weren’t able to offer much support to each other.

See, when I’m stressed out, I morph into a control freak – nit-picking, criticizing and belittling anyone in the near vicinity. I go around mumbling the “eff” word and flipping off fellow drivers. And thanks to the accompanying insomnia, I swap my normally high levels of patience for constant headaches and nausea.

Under normal conditions, however, Doo is there to talk me down off the proverbial ledge.

He steps up his parenting role and allows me to decompress sans children. And if I’ve let him see me cry, I can expect a break from laundry and kitchen duty to boot. (The tears always get ’em.)

And the same holds true when Doo is freak-

ing out. I make sure he has the time and space to work through his issues. I let him have his selfish moments and try to be a loving, supportive wife. And though I’m inclined to hold the inevitable poor choices made during his stressinduced tantrum over his head, I don’t. At least not for too long and only after I’m certain he has experienced proper remorse.

Problem is, I can’t be that supportive partner when I’m also experiencing chaos. And Doo sucks as an attentive spouse when he has got too much on his plate. So our household has been a war zone lately: me, barking orders and driving my children to seek refuge at neighbors, and Doo holing up and trying desperately not to suck his thumb like a toddler searching for his happy place.

And did I mention it’s the holidays? Office parties, family get-togethers, mall traffic, that stupid Elf on the Shelf commitment (I simply CANNOT come up with another location for Pickle Knuckle to appear!) … I’m amazed Doo and I are still functioning at all. The good news?

Come Jan. 3, we both will be starting dream jobs and, God willing, laughing about this crazy December.

Peace out, and Happy New Year!

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Danielle Wilson is a Carmel resident and contributing columnist.

You may e-mail her at danielle@ currentincarmel.com.

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» Fishers Chamber Pillar Awards – The Fishers Chamber of Commerce will present its Pillar Awards “Celebrating Business Excellence” at its monthly luncheon on Jan. 18, from 11:30 a.m. – 1 p.m at the FORUM Conference Center, 11313 USA Parkway, Fishers. For more information, visit the Chamber Web site at www.fisherschamber.com. » FHS students compete in Math Fax – Top performers in the December 7 Math Fax contest at Fishers High School are as follows: Algebra I: First - Amanda Hoover, Lexi Heer; Third - Andrew Zervos, Robert Swift, Connor Granwald; Geometry: First - Jordan Heiniger; Second - Rebecca Carr; Third - Sam Markwood, Molly Baldwin, Kelynn Shafer; Algebra II: First - Prabhdeep Singh; Second - Sydney Kemp; Third - Tara Scher, Ruth Xing; Advanced: First - Madeline Snipes; Second - Victor Gonsalves, Thomas Ritz.

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Family Owned

Joe Golden, Sue Albano and Beth Hanover, displaying their Hero Awards.

Sarah Blackwell with Town Council President Scott Faultless.

Sleep like a baby on a Bowles Mattress

Photos courtesy of the Town of Fsshers

Town recognizes local ‘Good Samaritans’

By Jordan Fischer jordan@youarecurrent.com The Fishers Town Council presented “Hero Awards” Monday night to several local residents who went above and beyond the call of duty to protect their fellow man.

On Nov. 13, Sarah Blackwell, 18, was eating lunch near 96th Street when she saw smoke coming from a residence across the street. She drove over to the home and discovered that not only was the building on fire, but the family who lived there was deaf. Blackwell, who studies American Sign Language at Hamilton Southeastern High School, helped the family communicate with firefighters who arrived to put out the fire.

On Nov. 19, teenagers Levi Colman and Matthew Cunningham saw a fire burning in bushes and vegetation next to a house on Trophy Drive. The pair put out the flames by the time the first fire engine arrived, saving the house from serious damage.

On Nov. 15, Andrew “Drew” Robinson, 17, suffered a seizure and cardiac arrest at Hamilton Southeastern High School. HSE staffers

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Levi Colman and Matthew Cunningham with Faultless.

Joe Golden, Sue Albano and Beth Hanover performed CPR and administered aid via an Automatic External Defibrillator (AED), which restarted Robinson’s heart with a single shock.

By the time paramedics arrived, Robinson was lucid and able to speak to firefighters and medics.

For more information about the awards, visit the Fishers Fire Department homepage at www. fishers.in.us/fire.

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Pritchard given Key to the Town

By Jordan Fischer jordan@youarecurrent.com Outgoing Fishers Town Council member Eileen Pritchard was awarded the Key to the Town Monday night by her colleagues at the final regular council meeting of the year.

Pritchard, a Fishers resident since 1977, has been a member of the Fishers Town Council since 1998. She and husband Randy have two children: a son, Cameron; and a daughter, Katie.

“It was a privilege and a joy to serve with someone so committed to the well-being of the community at large,” said Town Councilman Stuart Easley. “She grew up in Fishers as a child, went away to college, and returned to have a career and family. Her involvement in the community was a testament to her commitment to make the community a better place.”

While on the council, Pritchard brought a strong, fiscally conservative philosophy which influenced many of the Town’s positions on economic development strategies. She was a major advocate of expansion and improvements to the

6 | December 27, 2011

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Eileen Pritchard, right, with Town Council President Scott Faultless Photo by Jordan Fischer

Town’s parks and recreation facilities.

“To a very large degree, local government is very much about common sense and caring for the citizens’ needs and expectations, and in that she was an exemplar,” Easley said.

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Hauke pleads guilty to defrauding investors of corruption in our communities, and

By Jordan Fischer neither does this office,” Hogsett said. jordan@youarecurrent.com “No matter who it is or how much the Keenan R. Hauke, 40, of Fishers, amount, whether they be shareholders agreed to plead guilty last week to or taxpayers, if you are swindling harddefrauding investors of more than $7 working Hoosiers this office is commitmillion in connection with his role as Hauke ted to finding you, investigating you, owner and CEO of Fishers-based Samex and bringing you to justice.”

Capital Advisors.

Hauke founded Samex Capital Advisors in Hauke’s plea comes after a Dec. 14 charge 1999; forming a hedge fund and soliciting invesof securities fraud by U.S. Attorney Joseph tors. He was a frequent newspaper columnist and H. Hogsett. In his filing, Hogsett alleged that occasional Fox Business commentator. AccordHauke defrauded more than five dozen victims ing to court documents, in 2004 Hauke began of more than $7 million between 2004-2001. receiving funds illegally converted from investors, The filing comes after an April complaint which he then used to pay off a mortgage on his against Hauke and Samex Capital by the state personal residence. Hauke was also accused of for “misleading investors by failing to inform using new investor funds to pay off older clients, them that the funds they were investing would in what is known as a “Ponzi Scheme.” be converted to (Hauke’s) personal use” – origiA spokesman for Hogsett said Hauke is due nating from accusations by one of Hauke’s forin court for sentencing on Dec. 28. He faces a mer financial advisors, Scott Noble. maximum sentence of 25 years imprisonment “I want to be clear this morning: Hoosiers and up to $250,000 in fines. have no tolerance for those who foster a culture

Fishers named safest place to live in U.S. editorial@youarecurrent.com The Town of Fishers has been named the safest town in the nation by CQ Press in their City Crime Rankings 2011-2012: Crime in Metropolitan America report. The report is based on 2010 crime statistics of 405 cities in categories such as murder, rape, robbery, aggravated assault, burglary and motor vehicle theft.

According to CQ Press, “Last year CNN Money ranked Fishers number eight on its top 100 places to live in America. CNN Money noted the (town’s) low unemployment rate of just above 6 percent and cheap housing stock as reasons to make the move to Fishers. As CQ Press found, it also has a very low violent crime rate, with no murders and just four aggravated

assaults reported in 2010.”

“We are excited to be recognized as the safest place to live in the nation,” said Fishers Town Council President Scott Faultless. “This latest recognition is largely due to the outstanding efforts of Chief (George) Kehl and the members of the Fishers Police Department. We congratulate them for an exemplary job in keeping us safe.”

Published annually, City Crime Rankings is a staple resource for researchers, city and law enforcement officials, and news media that follow trends in crime. The rankings include all cities of at least 75,000 residents that reported crime data to the FBI in the categories noted for calendar year 2010.

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Teacher of the Month makes most of career change

By Jordan Fischer jordan@youarecurrent.com An injury sustained while serving in the U.S. Coast Guard proved fortuitous for Dan Renckly, who used the opportunity to transition into his dream career – teaching.

Renckly, 49, now teaches sixth grade science at Fall Creek Intermediate School in Fishers. He was selected recently as the December Marco’s Pizza Teacher of the Month.

“Every day … to me, it’s a lot of fun,” Renckly said, “because I know they’re going to learn something that they didn’t know. Every day it’s a challenge to be creative in the way you approach things.”

Renckly lives in Fishers with wife Jill, who teaches at Brooks School Road Elementary, and their six children – Charli, Danielle, Connor, Hailey, Cole and Caden – the youngest of which is just enrolling in preschool, the oldest two of whichattend Ball State University.

Renckly taught for six years in his native Arizona after earning his Master’s Degree in elementary education from Arizona State University. He brought his family to Fishers, he said, looking for a cooler climate.

Renckly, who was stationed on an ice breaker in Michigan during his service, said he has no qualms about his change in profession.

H

Dan Renckly with his sixth grade class Submitted Photo

“They offered me a chance to go to school … and I haven’t looked back since,” he said. “I absolutely love what I do. The kids here, to put it bluntly, are really a dream to teach.”

Renckly said he particularly enjoys getting to teach astronomy, which has long been one of his favorite subjects.

“I’m trying to churn out some astronauts,” he said. “I always tell my students, if they get a great job at NASA, I want a behind-the-scenes tour.”

To nominate an educator who goes above and beyond the call of duty to be the Marco’s Pizza Teacher of the Month, send your name, number and a 100-word summary of why you think your nominee is deserving of the award to Managing Editor Jordan Fischer at jordan@ youarecurrent.com. The deadline for nominations for the January award is Jan. 15.

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Fishers resident Ben Irvin turned a no-shaving dare into a community service project for at-risk families Photo by Jordan Fischer

By Jordan Fischer jordan@youarecurrent.com Ben Irvin is a brave man.

On a whim, the 25-year-old Fishers resident began growing a beard in July, “just to do it.”

On a dare, he decided to leave it untouched until December – not a particularly audacious endeavor, at first glance, until one talks to his vexed, if not good-humored, wife, Melissa.

“We’ve only been married for nine months … and he’s had this beard for six of them,” she said.

“I’m excited to shave it off … but, it was for a good cause, and we were excited to make children smile and bring a little holiday cheer to them.”

Not content simply to forgo shaving for nearly half a year, Irvin, as part of a community service project sponsored by his employer, Defender Direct, decided to bleach both his hair and beard white, don the familiar fur-trimmed red suit and become Santa Claus for children at the Children’s Bureau’s Gene Glick Family Support Center.

Named for local developer and philanthropist Gene Glick, the center offers preventive and support services for parents and caring for children in at-risk families. The center is in Indianapolis at 1575 W. Dr. Martin Luther King St. “It was really amazing how receptive the kids were,” Irvin said. “It was kind of humbling.

They didn’t ask for anything. When we were handing out presents, and asking what they wanted for Christmas, they just said, ‘The next present is fine.’”

“It seemed like they were more interested in the adults who had come down to interact and spend time with them,” Irvin said.

www.youarecurrent.com

Before

After

A culture of service The Indiana Children’s Bureau was one of many local organizations to be the beneficiary of Defender Direct employee service projects – and one of five to receive $10,000 grants from the home security and satellite services company.

“Community service is definitely one of the pillars of the company,” Irvin, who works in marketing for Defender Direct, said. “We usually do a volunteering experience once a quarter.

It’s definitely something the organization puts a heavy emphasis on.”

Irvin said that emphasis comes from the topdown, saying founder Dave Lindsay and president and CEO Marcia Raab have “servants’ hearts.”

“They try to encourage every member of the organization to experience the same thing,” Irvin said. “The company gives us two full paid days of work a year to volunteer, so they’re not penalizing us for missing work to volunteer, they’re actually incentivizing us.”

More information about Defender Direct and its corporate culture can be found online at

www.defenderdirect.com.

Six months, no shaving “For the first couple weeks, I just stopped shaving,” Irvin said of his initial decision. “Two months in, we had a visit from one of my aunts, who suggested I should grow it until Christmas.

From that, I talked to our marketing department about incorporating it into our December service project.”

Irvin said Melissa, 26, was very supportive of his hairy commitment. The two met while they were both students at Purdue – studying mass communication and business management, re-

spectively – where Melissa said Irvin never grew any facial hair, beyond a “little goatee.”

The two were married in April of this year, and live in Fishers – Irvin is a 2004 graduate of Hamilton Southeastern High School – with Kobe, their 3-year-old Papillon/Bischon Frise mix.

While Irvin said he enjoyed the experience, both he and Melissa seemed eager to finally pull out the electric razor.

“If I do it again … it will definitely be with a wig or fake beard,” Irvin said. “But I would love to volunteer like that again.”

Irvin, right, along with other Defender Direct employees presented a $10,000 check to the Children’s Bureau.

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December 27, 2011 | 9

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DISPATCHES » Are free albums the future? – Musicians no longer need to sell albums in order to be financially successful. That’s what industry insider Mark Geiger–of talent agency WME– said in a video interview with Billboard.biz a couple months ago. The idea is that great reviews help an artist build buzz and credibility, helping said artist gain a strong financial foothold when it comes to live performances. Obviously, this doesn’t work in every case, but that hasn’t stopped countless other acts from releasing new music online for free.

-www.forbes.com » Cursing Christmas present? – One of the hottest gifts this Christmas season was the You and Me Interactive Triplets sold at Toys R Us stores and online via Amazon.com. Many buyers, however, claim the supposedly babbling baby dolls say “You crazy b***h” in one of its audio recordings. Dozens of videos of the doll have been uploaded onto YouTube and angry parents have flooded Toys R Us with complaints.The toy store insists the baby is just babbling but is allowing offended customers to return the dolls with a receipt.

-www.news.com.au

» Memorable extras – Adding a few extra touches to your New Year’s Eve party can make it even more memorable. Leave your digital camera in a designated “photo corner” and encourage your friends to take photos of each other throughout the night.

After the party, choose the best pics and create a commemorative photo book to give to guests as gifts. You can also shoot video throughout the evening with your digital camera and afterwards, create a movie of the event and share with guests.

-www.workliveplaycafe.com » The best kitchen knife around? – Pineapple corers, egg slicers, melon knives, the Slap Chop — these are ridiculous things you should not have clogging up the drawers in your kitchen. The perfect tool for all of these jobs, and a good many more, is a simple, wellmade knife: the Gyutou, a Westernstyle chef’s knife handmade in Japan by the master forgers at Togiharu.

Many chefs have at least one Togiharu knife in their bag. It’s balanced, strong, comfortable, and ludicrously sharp. If you are ready to get serious about their chef’s knife, this is the one you want: 9.4” Togiharu Hammered Texture Damascus Gyutou, $169, korin.com.

M-F 8 - 4

Saturday – Come celebrate the end of 2011 at the inaugural “Family First Night” New Year’s Eve event at the Hamilton County 4-H Grounds Exhibition Hall C, 2003 Pleasant St., Noblesville.

The event will include free movies, games and food. Doors open at 7 p.m. with the double feature starting at 7:30 p.m. Movies include “The Apple Dumpling Gang” (1975) starring Don Knotts and “Lassie Come Home” (1943) star-

LIVE MUSIC Mickey’s Irish Pub, 13644 N. Meridian St. For more information call 573-9746.

Friday – Loo Abby Saturday – Whiskey Biscuits Mo’s Irish Pub, 13193 Levinson Lane in the Hamilton Town Center, Noblesville. For more

ring Roddy McDowall and Elizabeth Taylor.

Now to Saturday – Hamilton County Art Center & Birdie Gallery195 S. Fifth St., Noblesville, invites the public to visit and see art that represents “Good Things Come in Small Packages.”

Birdie Gallery hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Thursday, Friday and Saturday. For more information, visit www.hcaa-in.org.

Now to Jan. 7, 2012 – Grab your golden ticket as Civic Theatre presents Roald Dahl’s “Willy Wonka” at The Tarkington, 3 Center Green, Carmel. Performances are 7 p.m. Wednesday through Friday, 2 and 7 p.m. Saturday and 2 p.m. Sunday with no shows on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. Join Charlie Bucket and his quirky cohorts on a tantalizing tour of the mysterious candy-maker’s fantastical factory. For more information, call 843-3800 or visit www. civictheatre.org. information, call 770-9020.

Friday – My Yellow Rickshaw Saturday – Something Rather Naughty Moon Dog Tavern, 825 E 96th St., Indianapolis, 46240. Call 575-6364 for more information.

Thursday – Zanna Dooo Friday – Blonde Sonja

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Saturday – Start your New Year’s resolution to get in shape with “Race to the New Year” at Cool Creek Park, 2000-1 151st St., Westfield.

The Hamilton County Parks and Recreation Department is partnering with Washington Township Parks and Recreation and Westfield Parks and Recreation for this 5th Annual 5K walk and run. Awards will be given in seven age groups. Registration begins at 8:15 a.m. with the race starting at 9:30 a.m. For more information, call 574-9450.

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Carmel’s Most Anticipated Luxury Apartment Community

Wise Guys Pizza The Scoop: Hey, don’t “Forgedd-aboud-it!” Get wise to Wise Guys Pizza! For six years, Wise Guys Pizza has brought its unique blend of Italian cuisine to Fishers. Wise Guys Pizza serves up a menu of tasty pizza, subs, calzones, and strombolis in a traditional pizzeria setting. However, traditional doesn’t mean that there aren’t modern aspects.

Wise Guys Pizza has a plasma TV and features family-friendly seating. While you’re there, don’t forget to check out the original movie posters and artwork that decorate the walls of this family-owned and operated restaurant.

Type of Food: Pizza and Italian dishes Price of Entrees: $8 to $19 Specialties: Pizza

Craig Costa, GM Chili’s Grill and Bar Restaurant Where do you like to dine?

Bonges Tavern What do you like to eat there?

“They have the best applewood-smoked ribs!”

What do you like about Bonges? “I like the prices for the food. It’s five-star but for a threestar price.”

Bonges is located at 9830 West 280 North, Perkinsville. They can be reached at (765)7341625 and www.bongestavern.

Reservations: Not accepted Smoking: Not permitted Dress: Casual Hours: 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Monday through Saturday Phone: 915-8202 Address: 11005 Allisonville Rd., Fishers Website: www.wiseguysinfishers.com

Depaz Hottie Ingredients: 1 lb. brown sugar, 2 oz. Depaz Cane Syrup, 1/4 lb. butter, Pinch of salt, 4 oz. fresh apple cider, 1/2 tsp. nutmeg, 1/2 tsp. cinnamon Preperations: Blend the ingredients together and bring to a boil before removing from the heat. Select an appropriate mug. Add 2 heaping tablespoons of the prepared cocktail base. 2 oz. Depaz Blue Cane Amber Rhum. Approximately 6 oz. hot water.

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Gougères You can prepare these party favorites ahead of time and bake them not long before your guests arrive.

Ingredients: • 2/3 cup beer • 1/3 cup milk • 8 tablespoons butter, thickly sliced • 3/4 teaspoon fine grain sea salt • scant 1/2 cup all-purpose flour • scant 1/2 cup oz whole wheat flour • 4 large eggs, room temperature • 1 1/4 cup sharp white cheddar, grated on box grater • 1 teaspoon fennel seeds, crushed Directions 1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees, with a rack in top third. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

2. Bring the beer, milk, butter, and salt just to a boil in a large (thick-bottomed) saucepan over medium-high heat. Dial back the heat a bit. Add the flours and use a wooden spoon to stir, stir, stir. Really go at it. Keep going for a couple minutes, until the dough comes together smoothly, and gives off a faint toasty scent. Remove from heat and let cool, stirring occasionally to

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let heat out, for about five minutes, long enough that the eggs won’t cook when you attempt to work them in.

3. One at a time, add each of the four eggs, stirring vigorously after each addition. Stir in 1 cup of the cheese, and right away scoop gougères onto the prepared baking sheet in heaping tablespoon-sized dollops, leaving at least 1 1/2 inches between each. Sprinkle with the remaining cheese and fennel seeds.

Place in the oven, bake for 5 minutes, then dial the heat back to 375, and bake another 20 to 25 minutes, or until gougères are deeply golden all over, puffed, and well set.

-www.101cookbooks.com

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December 27, 2011 | 11

Healthy Times A W E E K LY P U B L I C AT I O N O F S T. V I N C E N T M E D I C A L C E N T E R N O R T H E A S T

northeast.stvincent.org

•

13914 Southeastern Parkway (I-69 & State Road 238) Fishers, IN (317) 415-9000

ISSUE #45

PROVIDER SPOTLIGHT

Michael Thieken, Md Sports Medicine, Orthopedic Surgeon

New year, new . . . running schedule?

RuN SMARTER ANd SAFER. Here we are again, in the season of good intentions and excess enthusiasm. When those two characteristics join forces in a new runner (or even in an experienced runner), overuse injuries are often the result.

Physical Therapist Rod Tank sees more overuse injuries than other running-related injuries, and he offers advice for avoiding them, asking all runners to focus on the six S’s: Schedule: Avoiding running too much and resting too little. As you build mileage, increase no more than 10 percent a week.

Surface: Hills add unique stresses to your joints and muscles.

Treadmills are softer than roadways, which are softer than sidewalks. When you’re just getting started, you might want to avoid hills and concrete.

Shoes: It’s worth going to a specialized shoe store and having a salesperson match your shoe to your foot and gait. But perhaps the most important thing is to replace your shoes regularly. Five hundred miles is the absolute maximum you should put on a pair of shoes.

Dr. Michael Thieken received his medical degree from Indiana University School of Medicine in 2002. He completed his surgical internship in 2003 and his orthopedic surgery residency in 2007. In 2008, Dr. Thieken completed an Arthroscopy and Sports Medicine Fellowship at New Mexico Orthopaedics in Albuquerque, New Mexico.

Strength: Weakness, particularly in the hips, plagues even the most experienced runners. A physical therapist can help identify and suggest ways to strengthen your weak areas.

Stretching: In addition to forgoing stretching altogether, mistakes like stretching unevenly or overstretching are common. A good stretching program can help you avoid injury. Talk to a physical therapist to learn stretching exercises and form.

Structure: Maybe your feet are flat. Or your knees angle out a bit. You can’t change your body’s structure, but you might be able to use orthotics to overcome the challenges.

Finally, the best advice for new, returning or advancing runners is worth reiterating: Build slowly, whether you’re working to increase mileage or increase your speed. You can’t become a runner overnight, nor can you jump from beginner status to marathoner in a week. Trying to leap from one stage to another can take weeks off your progress by causing an injury that keeps you off your feet.

To schedule a Physical Therapy appointment at St.Vincent Medical Center Northeast, call 317-415-9135.

Dr. Thieken is a physician with OrthoIndy® and a member of the American Academy of Orthopedic Surgeons, American Orthopaedic Society for Sports Medicine and the Arthroscopy Association of North America.

His focus includes: • Sports-related injuries • Arthroscopic surgery of the shoulder, knee and hip • Knee and shoulder reconstruction • Cartilage repair and restoration • Knee and shoulder replacement • Fracture management • Work-related injuries dr. Thieken sees patients at St.Vincent Medical Center Northeast in Suite 301. Call 317-802-2863 to schedule an appointment.

H E A LT H Y T I M E S

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A publication of St.Vincent Medical Center Northeast

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St.Vincent Medical Center Northeast 13914 Southeastern Parkway, Fishers

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St.Vincent Medical Center Northeast is right here at Exit 10 on I-69.

And with a full-service emergency department, complete diagnostic services, primary care and specialty physicians, and lots more, all under one roof, The Spirit of Caring has never been closer.

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DISPATCHES » Texts combat problem drinking? – In a recent study, 15 heavy drinking young adults who sent and received weekly text messages tracking their alcohol consumption reported drinking less at the end of the 12-week program than they did at the beginning. By comparison, a group of similar 18- to 24-year-olds who sent but didn’t receive texts and a control group that sent no texts at all didn’t manage to scale back their drinking as effectively. Although the study should be considered preliminary, given its size, the researchers say that textmessage programs are a promising strategy for reducing problem drinking, as well as other dangerous or unhealthy behaviors.

-www.health.com » Herbal remedies – To prevent flu infection, try taking immunomodulating herbs, especially Panaxquinquefolius (American ginseng), because there are clinical trials showing it can prevent both colds and flu.

This may also help flu vaccines work better, especially in the elderly. Follow the dosage instructions that come with the product, and continue to use hand washing and other flu-preventing strategies.

-www.prevention.com

Celebrate the Season with Us!

Realistic goals important for cosmetic surgery ANTI-AGING

By Dr. Barry Eppley Q: I had liposuction six months ago on my stomach, saddle bags, flanks and inner thighs.

The doctor told me he removed 4 liters of fat. I am very happy with the results, with the exception of my inner thighs. I now have some saggy skin and irregularities of the inner thighs. Is this common afterwards? Can some form of non-surgical skin tightening be done to make it better?

A: Liposuction can be tremendously effective for many body areas, and the inner thighs are no exception. But inner thigh skin does not usually have much ability to contract, so only conservative fat removal should be done in this area and patient expectations should be tempered as to how much size reduction can be done. If too much fat is removed, the inner thigh skin can be made to sag with irregularities. There are numerous non-surgical skin tightening devices that can be tried and they have all have some effect.

My current favorite device is Exilis, which uses monopolar radiofrequency energy to create skin tightening through a series of treatments. If this is not successful, you may need a definite inner thigh lift which will solve this concern.

Q: Dr. Eppley, I have a rather big nose (and it becomes much bigger when I smile or grimace). How much of it can be reduced by rhinoplasty? Can I have a nose like, for example, Angelina Jolie? And the other question is, will

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my nose get bigger (when I smile or grimace) after a nose job?

A: The first concept to grasp about rhinoplasty surgery is that you cannot have a nose like someone else. While it is important to have a surgical goal, looking like someone else’s nose is not realistic. This is particularly true when it comes to a large nose with thick skin. There are simply limits as to what can be achieved based on the amount and thickness of the nasal skin cover. Whether rhinoplasty is worthwhile for you, or any patient, requires some sense of what the result may be using computer imaging. When done carefully by an experienced rhinoplasty surgeon, you will get a much better sense of whether rhinoplasty can make enough of a difference to justify the effort. When I do rhinoplasty computer imaging, I always show the most conservative or achievable result that I think can happen. That way, if the patient chooses to have rhinoplasty surgery, they will not be disappointed and may even be pleasantly surprised. With smiling, everyone’s nose gets wider as the facial muscles pull the nostrils to the side.

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Tuesday, Dec. 27, 2011 Vol. 1, No. 7

COMMUNITY EVENTS

Many seniors find the winter months a perfect time to see the world, enjoy warmer climates

By Jordan Fischer jordan@youarecurrent.com The holidays are a popular time for travel, and seniors are no exception to this rule.

Whether they’re snow birds heading to warmer climates, visiting out-of-state children, or just joining the rest of the family for a holiday vacation away from home, many seniors will make the most of their Golden Years by opting out of some of Indiana’s less-pleasant months.

Despite a still-sluggish economy, leisure travel, both domestic and international, is showing signs of an increase, according to an annual Travel Trends Survey released this week by the Travel Leaders company. And, while 43 percent of respondents in the survey said they’d be spending roughly the same amount per trip in 2012 as they did in 2011, 44 percent said they’d likely be spending more.

For those looking to book travel plans to escape the winter months, seniors or otherwise, the Travel Leaders report contained plenty of other useful information, including top destinations and average trip-planning time:

Winter Market – The Carmel Winter Market will resume at Carmel City Center, 720 S. Range Line Rd, beginning at 9 a.m. on Jan. 7. The free, public event features 15 to 20 vendors from the Carmel Farmers Market and, with exceptions during the holiday season, will be held every Saturday through March 17. For more information, visit www. carmel.in.gov.

Santa’s Train Home – This short, fun train ride takes families from the Fishers train station to the North Pole at ITM in Noblesville’s Forest Park. Say goodbye to Santa and then return on the scenic trip to Fishers. Passengers also might get one last gift from Santa. This train will operate twice each day on Tuesday and Wednesday. Departure times on both days are 10:30 am and 1:30 pm. from the train station, 11601 Municipal Dr., Fishers.

All-you-can-eat pancakes – Breakfast at the Carmel Lodge No. 421 will be held Jan. 14 from 7 to 10 a.m. at the lodge, 310 1st St. NE. Attendees are asked to make a donation of $5 for adults and $2 for children. For more information, visit www.carmel.in.gov.

Las Vegas

Top 2012 International Destinations

Top 2012 Domestic Destinations Las Vegas – 49.5% Orlando – 44.8% Maui, Hawaii – 44.2% Alaskan Cruise – 37% New York City – 31.4% Honolulu, Hawaii – 28.9% Washington, D.C. – 16.6% Chicago – 15.2% Los Angeles – 11.9% Phoenix, Ariz. – 11.1% Numbers based on percentage of travel agents who reported booking one or more trips to these locations.

Cancun, Mexico

Domestic Travel Booking Window 4 weeks or less – 21.2% 5-7 weeks – 15.1% 8 weeks or more – 63.7%

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International Travel Booking Window 4 weeks or less – 6.4% 5-7 weeks – 4.1% 8 weeks or more – 89.5%

Caribbean Cruise – 47.5% Cancun, Mexico – 34.8% Playa del Carmen, Mexico – 31.1% Mediterranean Cruise – 25.9% Rome – 20.9% London – 17.3% Punta Cana, Dominican Republic – 16.4% Paris – 13.8% Montego Bay, Jamaica – 13.1% Negril, Jamaica – 13.1%

Natural health open house – Join the Logan Institute for Health & Wellness (8499 Fishers Center Drive) on January 12, 4 to 7 p.m. for a free Natural Health Educational Open House. The practitioners present will be experts in naturopathic nutrition, acupuncture, massage, hypnosis, reflexology, detoxification, Reiki, yoga and much more. Attendees will also have a chance to schedule an appointment with each practitioner at a 25 percent discount. For more information, visit www.loganmd.com.

Sam Bush Band – The Sam Bush Band will perform at the Palladium in Carmel, 3 Center Green, Jan. 12 at 8 p.m. Bush is a Grammy Award-winning vocalist and multi-instrumentalist who fuses traditional bluegrass music with jazz, rock, blues, funk and other styles. He has been honored by the Americana Music Association and is the co-founder of the genre-bending New Grass Revival. For tickets or more information, visit www.thecenterfortheperformingarts.org.

Euchre group – The euchre group will meet at the Westfield Washington Public Library twice next month, Jan. 11 and 25, at 5:30 p.m. The library is at 333 W. Hoover St. For more information, visit www. wwpl.lib.in.us or call 896-9391.

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It’s Golden | Current Publishing Special Section | It’s Golden Giving Florida the cold shoulder? – According to the Empire Center for New York State Policy, 2009 marked the first time that more people left New York state for North Carolina than for Florida. A lot of states are trying to attract retirees, population studies specialist Stan Smith told Reuters. Between 2000 and 2009, New Yorkers migrating to the Sunshine State, for example, delivered $11 billion of new net income to Florida.

-Reuters Medicare experiment – Medicare says it’s launching a national experiment to improve care for seniors, and hopefully save taxpayers money as well. Officials announced Monday that 32 networks of doctors and hospitals around the country are becoming Pioneer Accountable Care Organizations, or ACOs. The networks will be eligible for financial rewards if they improve care and lower costs.

-www.yahoo.com Try these maneuvers – To keep your blood pressure from dropping upon standing, wiggle your toes and flex your feet before you stand up to help push blood back up to the heart. Squatting and stooping forward can temporarily increase blood pressure.

Once you’re standing, crossing and tensing your legs may also improve blood flow and even out distribution of blood in the body.

If you’ve been standing awhile, sitting down is a simple way to help your cardiovascular system maintain blood pressure.

-Harvard Health Letter Intense workouts for diabetics – Brief high intensity workouts - as little as six sessions over two weeks - rapidly lower blood sugar levels in type 2 diabetics, offering a potential fix for patients who struggle to meet exercise guidelines, according to researchers at McMaster University in Canada. Their study found that a total of 30 minutes of high-intensity intermittent exercise per week, involving a total time commitment of 75 minutes, lowered 24-hour blood sugar concentrations, reduced blood sugar spikes after meals, and increased skeletal muscle mitochondrial capacity, a marker of metabolic health.

-www.seniorjournal.com Give generously before Dec. 31 – Are you charitably-minded but not sure what charity you want to benefit from your largesse?

Then consider putting money into a donor-advised fund by December 31. You get a charitable deduction upfront to offset your 2011 income (you’ll see the benefit on the tax return you file April 2012), and you get to dole out the money you stashed in the fund to operating charities of your choice later.

-www.forbes.com

Noninvasive facial rejuvenation the buzz in cosmetic circles ANTI-AGING

By Drs. Robert Jackson and Chris Lowrey Non-surgical facial rejuvenation is currently in vogue with individuals looking for cosmetic improvement without the down time of a traditional surgical procedure. Noninvasive procedures include chemical peels, laser skin rejuvenation, dermabrasion and microchanneling technology.

Previously, patients of these cosmetic procedures could expect treatments that were often painful, and came packaged with extended downtimes, depending upon the intensity of treatment. Recent dermatological advances, however, have shown marked reductions in both pain and downtime – and the Indianapolis area is starting to see these treatments offered in medical offices. Among the more promising of these for consumers to keep their eyes on are DermaFrac and the Vi Peel, a new micro-channeling technology and deep chemical peel, respectively.

The DermaFrac system is a micro-needling treatment designed to deliver injectable “cosmeceuticals” directly into the junction of the dermis and epidermis. High-grade active serums (anti-aging peptides, skin lighteners, hyaluronic

acid moisturizers, and acne treatments, etc.) are injected through microscopic pathways into the skin, activating its natural rejuvenating processes. Treatments last 15-20 minutes, and run from $175-$250. Patients experience some post-procedure redness, but usually no pain. The procedure may be repeated approximately every four weeks if needed.

Traditionally, chemical peel patients had to weigh the benefits of better results with a corresponding increase in pain and downtime.

New procedures like the Vi Peel are (virtually) painless options for patients seeking skin tightening, removal of fine lines, or to help “slough off” the upper layer skin from an aging face. Such peels take approximately 15 minutes and require no reconditioning. After the procedure, patients’ skin will be slightly red, and begin to lightly peel around the third day. The procedure runs $300-$500.

Drs. Robert Jackson and Chris Lowrey are board certified cosmetic surgeons with Hamilton Surgical Arts.

They can be contacted at hamiltonsurgicalarts@yahoo.com.

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16 | December 27, 2011

Current in Fishers

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It’s Golden | Current Publishing Special Section | It’s Golden

Body Recall founder got us moving COMMENTARY

By Marcia Wilson In 1978, about the same time Detroit was starting to recall cars, Dorothy Chrisman was starting to recall “senior citizens.” A physical education and health instructor at Berea College, Dorothy was challenged to offer an exercise course for older adults. In the 70s, our exercise gurus were Richard Simmons and Jane Fonda, but the idea of “old” people exercising was not on the radar. Information was slim to none on the subject, so as she taught she monitored acceptance, comfort level, enthusiasm and anecdotal results. Students actually used the word “fun” when describing her class. What was supposed to be a one semester course turned into a lifetime commitment for Dorothy and her students. She named the program Body Recall, and class members could be seen wearing shirts that read, “This body has been recalled.”

Dorothy was ahead of the times. She realized more than 30 years ago that old age isn’t a disease.

Lack of movement is the biggest culprit as we age, because without proper movement the body will “rust-out.” So as they exercised, her students learned how movement massages the blood vessels, helping circulation in all parts of the body; they learned how movement strengthens bones; and they learned how movement stimulates production of the synovial fluid that keeps the joints lubricated. They learned that they were not too old to maintain and/or improve their level of well-being and independence.

In recent years, Dorothy recognized that physical activity is our best bet to combat rising healthcare costs. While the medical system has enabled us to live longer lives, it’s up to us to make those extra years better and healthier.

In her words, “I feel there is no single effort that can help more in lowering medical bills, preventing hospitalization, depression and stress and giving purposeful momentum to people than to get them moving and help them continue to keep physically active.”

Dorothy passed away recently, but her inspiration and her teachings live on. More than 300 instructors in 32 states continue her mission to get people moving and keep them moving.

In January of 2011, a group of adults, 50 to 90-something, decided to give it a try, so we started a small class at the Fishers United Methodist Church. The class was to meet for only 10 weeks, and in what seems to be Body Recall tradition, the class is still meeting and growing. We learn, we laugh, we move, and the side-effects of our simple movements include strength, balance and stability.

As we look toward 2012 with our resolutions (and excuses), remember that exercise is not about the class or the gym – it’s about living.

Marcia Wilson holds an M.A. in gerontology and Body Recall courses for aging adults in Fishers. Wilson can be reached at wanderw@iquest.net.

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Food for thought about medical terms HEALTH

By Jugnoo Husain ‘Tis the season for food, so I decided to bake some Christmas cookies that called for dried cherries. The cherries brought to mind a benign skin lesion (an unfortunate occupational hazard of being a pathologist) called a “cherry angioma,” a cherry-red growth caused by proliferation of capillaries under the skin. In fact, there are numerous medical conditions described in food terms. These terms possibly originated from a pre-technology era when physicians had only their senses (smell, touch, sight) to arrive at diagnoses. The sight and smell of food could have been a universally understood way to describe certain diseases.

Berries, especially strawberries, seem to be a favorite. There’s “strawberry tongue,” as seen in scarlet fever or toxic shock syndrome. A “strawberry nevus” is a benign skin growth in infants. A “strawberry gallbladder” aptly describes the inner surface of the gallbladder studded with cholesterol deposits. “Mulberry molars” refer to defective molar teeth caused by congenital syphilis. Finally, a “berry aneurysm” is a berry-like protrusion at a branch point of a vessel wall in the brain.

Pathologists use food-related terminology the most, as they’re the ones who see and diagnose diseased tissues. Inflammation of the sac around the heart, often associated with acute rheumatic

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fever, is described as “bread and butter pericarditis.” There are “chocolate ovarian cysts” of endometriosis, “coffee bean nuclei” of certain tumors, and “popcorn cells” of Hodgkin’s disease.

A congested liver is described as “nutmeg liver,” one multicystic condition of the breast is “Swiss cheese disease,” and “Wharton’s jelly” is the gelatinous substance in the umbilical cord. Perhaps the most descriptive is “maple syrup urine disease,” an inherited disorder of metabolism in infants where the body cannot break down certain amino acids. The urine of these infants has a distinctive sweet smell, hence the name.

Not to be outdone, however, other medical specialties also have their own terminology.

Radiologists have their “pancake vertebra” and “sausage digits,” while GI physicians describe dilated stomach blood vessels as a “watermelon stomach.” Dermatologists see cherries, strawberries, and café-au-lait spots, just to name a few.

This is not an exhaustive list, just a few amusing examples of how food infuses the language of medicine.

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Current in Fishers

December 27, 2011 | 17

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Basement bedroom with new egress window REMODELING

By Larry Greene Original basement: This home was built in 2005 in the Village of West Clay development on the west side of Carmel. The original builder finished about two-thirds of the basement, but there was also a significant amount of unused area left. When asked why they decided to remodel, they homeowners said, “We have triplets – two boys and a girl. The boys have shared a bedroom for the past 12 years. We wanted them to have their own space so we decided to do that by remodeling our basement and giving them their own bedrooms.”

Egress window: Local building codes required the addition of an egress window and window well in the new bedroom. The driveway is very close to the window so the design included the installation of a decorative wrought iron fence around the window well. The existing concrete foundation wall was cut and a new window meeting building code for egress was installed. The window well outside the new 48-by-48-foot window was designed to allow natural daylight and ventilation into lower-level

Before living areas. This satisfied section R310.2 of the International Building Code (IRC 2009) for emergency egress. The terraced step design facilitates emergency egress and can be used as a planter for added visual enhancement. The designer chose a soft earth tone color to complement the basement interior and blend with the landscaping and exterior colors.

Final result: The homeowner decided to add a new walk-in closet in the new bedroom. The new bedroom has the same square footage as the other bedroom that already existed in the

After basement. They both have the same look and feel and now each boy has his own room. The homeowner commented, “It doesn’t feel like a basement. It’s very warm and comfortable down there. The boys absolutely love it.”

Larry Greene is the president of Case Design/Remodeling, a fullservice design/build firm serving Hamilton County. Contact him at lgreene@indy.rr.com.

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December 27, 2011 | 19

Views | Community | Cover Story | Diversions | Anti-Aging | It’s Golden | Inside & Out | Laughs | Puzzles | Classifieds

A holiday brew ha ha!

LAUGHS

By Dick Wolfsie No one is better at returning presents than my wife – some would say it’s a gift. The only year I rivaled her was 2009. Mary Ellen checked out two novels from the library that I wanted to read because she thought it was a waste of money to actually buy the books. She wrapped them up and gave them to me for Christmas. I returned both of them.

I don’t have a gift-giving knack. One problem is that I am not a very good listener, which explains why three years ago I got my wife an Irish Setter for Christmas when what she wanted was an Irish sweater.

But this year, my wife’s unhappiness with my gift selection takes the cake. For the first time in our marriage, Mary Ellen has chosen to return something before she’s even opened it – a decision she made by simply observing the package under the tree. It was a Keurig coffeemaker, the one with the compact individual containers that brew one cup at a time. We have a standard coffeemaker in the kitchen, made by Black and Decker. I choose not to drink liquids from an appliance made by the same people who manufacture my weed whacker. That’s not the way I want to get my buzz in the morning.

I was quite proud of the time and effort I had put into the selection of this gift. The meticulous wrapping of it alone had taken almost an hour of my time, but that’s because the line for

that service at the store was long.

Mary Ellen walked into the room and saw it.

“What a beautiful box – so tastefully wrapped,” she said. “But I don’t want what’s inside. I’ll take it back today before those return lines get too long.”

“Huh? You don’t even know what it is, Mary Ellen!”

“Yes, I do.” “Okay, give me a hint.”

“That’s not the way it works, Dick. I don’t give you hints. You’re supposed to give me hints.

The gift is for me, remember?”

“I think you are bluffing. You have no idea what’s inside.”

“Well let’s see. My guess is that I already have something similar, that it will take up more space on the counter than the current one, and that the little disposable containers it uses are bad for the environment. Oh, and a cup of coffee will taste exactly the same as it does now, but for three times the money.”

“Wow, I think you pretty much nailed it. But other than all that, why don’t you want it?”

Mary Ellen agreed to take back the Keurig after New Year’s, just so I can say she kept one gift for at least a week. Returning a coffeemaker any sooner would be grounds for divorce.

Dick Wolfsie is an author, columnist, and speaker. Contact him at wolfsie@aol.com.

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20 | December 27, 2011

Current in Fishers

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Views | Community | Cover Story | Diversions | Anti-Aging | It’s Golden | Inside & Out | Laughs | Puzzles | Classifieds Across 1. Atomizer output 5. Hamilton County animal shelter home 9. Indy basketball legend, ___ Robertson 14. WTHR anchor, ___ Marie Tiernon 15. Fair Oaks Farms group 16. Rudely push 17. Ponzi scheme, e.g.

18. Awestruck 19. Took a shine to?

20. Phrase that will be said a lot this week (3 wds.)

23. General Mills brand at Marsh 24. Steep drop-offs 28. Sort 31. Indianapolis Zoo lair 32. The third degree at PU 33. Mythical bird 34. Not optional 36. Sound from 15-Across 37. Thomas ___ Howe Academy 38. Swipe a base at Victory Field 39. Old Town Tavern beer, briefly 40. Pig out 41. Cable TV award won by Peyton Manning 42. Former IU football coach, ___ Cameron 43. Poland’s second-largest city 44. In times past 45. ___-di-dah 46. Last word of “America, the Beautiful” 47. Indiana hog heaven?

48. Genghis Khan, e.g.

50. Butler sorority letter 52. Song associated with 20-Across (3 wds.)

57. Prominent, like Richard Lugar 60. Inactive 61. Fly like an eagle at Eagle Creek Park 62. Counting everything (2 wds.)

63. Needs to go to IU Health 64. Fishers HS pitchers’ stats 65. Rotten 66. “___ we forget...”

67. Riverbend Campground sight Down 1. WISH war sitcom from 1972-83 2. Old Peruvian 3. Colts center Jeff Saturday’s first responsibility 4. Entice 5. Cheered in unison for the Shamrocks 6. Sea between Turkey and Greece 7. Sound of an empty stomach 8. Jittery 9. Warren Commission subject 10. Puppeteer Lewis 11. WRTV’s “Cougar Town” star, Courteney ___ 12. Mass. or Keystone follower 13. Lawrence North HS color 21. Alpine call 22. Bluespring Caverns sound 25. Hinkle Fieldhouse dogs?

26. Drew a blank 27. Off the wall 28. Pants measurement at Lucy’s Tailor 29. “Get a move on!” (2 wds.)

30. “___ Truckin’” (2 wds.)

32. Pea’s place 35. Carmel furs name 36. Ornamental flower at Andrews 37. Cloak-and-dagger org.

39. Scrooge’s cry 40. North Carolina fort 42. Indiana Live! poker action 43. Sharpest

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CHA EBOW ERY EWH ITE JAG JOH MON NSON RLI TGOM TIMT UAR

1) Kennedy Successor (2) ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

2) IUPUI Mascot (2) ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___

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___ ___ ___ ___ ___

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45. So everyone can hear 46. Shirt sizes at Nordstrom 49. Highlanders, e.g.

50. Gold 104.5 song words Bank, 51. Money inbuild Oldthe National say 53. Obsolescent phone feature 54. Olden days

55. Amber Indian RestaurantHARVARD, bread 56. Prefix with “while” 57. Common Dads Club soccer game score 58. Lennon’s widow 59. Ball State fraternity letter

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Indiana University Health Saxony Hospital brings nationally ranked care focused on cardiovascular, orthopedics, spine care and emergency services to your community this December. Conveniently located just off Exit 10 in Fishers.

2011 U.S.News & World Report rankings

Discover the strength at iuhealth.org/saxony

©2011 IU Health 11/11 HY83911_4204

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