DATING DURING A LOCK

DatingDuring a Lockdown

How to better handle being separated from your partner

Georgia is officially on lockdown, and while that has not changed everyone’s day-to-day lives, most people are experiencing certain conflicts that they never had to encounter before. One of these is dating during a lockdown.

People can find themselves in many different situations during lockdown. Some people who are living with their significant other may suddenly find themselves around them 24/7 for the first time in their relationship. Some couples may not have experienced much change because they were already long distance, communicating over the phone and used to spending time separately.

For most relationships, however, this may be the first time that they are being forced to stay apart, and that can certainly be difficult in a loving relationship. For those who find themselves in this boat during the lockdown, the following tips and tricks may help make things a little bit easier for your relationship at this time.

1. See this as a self improvement opportunity.

Every relationship is comprised of the people who make it up, so working on yourself is an excellent way of working on your relationship. Use this time alone to really meditate on who you are, what your needs and wants are, but most importantly: what you can improve or change for the better. Journal, read some self-help type books, and really analyze your habits, words, and actions. If you find you have some toxic traits as most people do—don’t worry!—decide what actions you can take to correct them. Doing so will result in a much happier and healthier relationship in the long run. Then, when you come back together with your significant other(s), you can be confident that you have a healthy romance.

2. Connect in new ways.

With today’s technology, there’s no shortage of communication channels to talk to your loved one while you both are at home. There is always FaceTime, Skype, and now the oh-so-loved Zoom, but don’t forget that you can also use Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook Messenger, or WhatsApp to video chat! Outside of video chatting, you can still watch Netflix together using a Netflix Party browser Chrome extension, or maybe even get old fashioned and send some snail mail with that fancy stationary that you haven’t used in years!

3. Find a balance.

Being able to talk to your sweetheart all day everyday is a great advantage of modern technology, but sometimes it can do more harm than good. The truth is, experts say that talking everyday might actually be harmful to your relationship. Keep some of the mystery alive! If you are constantly speaking all day, you may run out of things to talk about, and the conversation won’t be as special or exciting. Consider waiting till the end of the day to do a video chat or phone call so that you can tell each other about your days and have plenty of things to catch up on.

4. Even so, ensure you are communicating clearly.

Being separated physically may be hard on you, and enduring all of the other changes of being on lockdown may also be taking a toll on your psyche. Instead of letting negative thoughts and feelings seep into your system, be sure to communicate with your partner how you are feeling and if there is any way for them to help. On the flip side of that, make sure you are also reaching out to check on them and trying to help their psyche any way that you can. Remember that this is a partnership, and you can lean on each other in hard times. Be careful, it can be easy to just sweep negative feelings under the rug and then let them fester, leading to problems later on. Just communicate clearly and effectively, and make sure your loved one knows that they are loved!

5. Use this as a time to truly get to know them better.

Sometimes, it is easy to fall into a routine and just go about everyday mundane life with the person you’re in a relationship with. This in itself has a beautiful value, but once you fall into this, sometimes deep conversations and learning about each other is set to the curbside. Day-to-day life is necessary, but if your conversations are typically reduced to agenda-setting, it could be hard to feel that ‘spark’ of passion, regardless of whether you are together or apart. So use this time to really talk to each other, and instead of sharing daily “wyd” updates, talk about your greatest ambitions, fears, and memories. Also look forward, and talk about all the things you want to do once you are physically back together again!