Memphis Parent May 2020

M AY 2020

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CURBING SCREEN TIME

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Model representations of real patients are shown. Actual patients cannot be divulged due to HIPAA regulations.

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M AY

SonSurf

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COVER KIDS WINNERS

Announcing the winners of our cover kids contest.

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TIPS FOR A HEALTHY PREGNANCY

D E PA R TM E N T S

Ways to make those nine months go by smoother.

by Jamie Lober

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MANAGING EAR INFECTIONS

Exploring causes, effects, and treatment of this common illness.

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THE BEST GIFT FOR YOUR FAMILY IS YOUR BEST SELF

Don’t forget the importance of self-care.

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by Stephanie Pereira

FAMILY CHOICE AWARDS

You voted, we listened — here are your favorites!

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AVOIDING EXCESSIVE SCREEN TIME

A doctor speaks on the harmful effects and tips on curbing them.

DEAR TEACHER Using rhyming to teach reading Page 6 OUTSTANDING TEACHER Celebrating unsung heroes Page 21 DAD LIBS My babies aren’t babies anymore Page 22 FAVORITE MOMENTS Kid funnies and photos Page 23

by Julia Baker

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Things have been … quite different, haven’t they? While we’ve all been sheltering in place, schooling from home, and crossing our fingers that Kroger will have toilet paper in stock next time we make a run for essentials, something bigger has happened amid the chaos and uncertainty of the COVID-19 crisis.

Certainly, as many others, I’m sure, I’ve had moments of panic and frustration.

Working from home is not the cakewalk some may expect it to be. As I write this in late April, our team now must communicate via an online chat channel, Slack, or by video conference on Zoom. The days of marking up physical pages during the copyediting process are behind us. All the files for the issue you see before you have lived on a virtual server until now. Once a story was ready to be designed, a note was sent, via a clacking keyboard: “Bryan, copy is ready for X story.” And later, a response, more typing, “Shara, X story is ready for you.” I miss actual talking and holding printed pages. Anyhow, we hope this issue turned out OK, considering it has materialized from keystrokes and general silence out of a digital cloud.

But back to what’s happened. Aside from the crumbling of routine and longterm plans flying out the window, we’ve all had a chance to slow down. We’ve been forced to spend more time at home with our families, and as exasperating as that may seem at times (“Mom!” “Dad!” “Look at this!” — or *thinking to yourself* “Didn’t I just do the dishes?”), it’s been a bit of a blessing in disguise.

We’ve all grown a little closer, with those living inside our homes, and even in some ways with friends and family who don’t, with complete strangers all across the world, and with what’s going on in our own minds. Some of us are having more, and longer, telephone conversations with our loved ones. Others are meeting virtually on Zoom with groups of friends or for birthday celebrations. Somehow in the separation, a deeper connectedness has been unearthed. We’re all in this together — this crisis, this world, this life.

With the planet experiencing one big pause and inching down to a fraction of its usual hurriedness, I hope you’ve all had a chance to re-evaluate what’s important in your life, what worked and what didn’t. Maybe when we all crawl out of this, we’ll have learned more about how we want to live our lives moving forward. I know for certain that we’ll all come out the other side stronger, more resilient, and with our hearts full of love and appreciation.

In the meantime, be well and take care of yourselves!

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THE IMPORTANCE OF RHYMING TO LEARNING TO READ Why is teaching rhyming so important when teaching children how to read?

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learned almost every consonant sound, giving them an excellent start in becoming both readers and spellers.

One great feature of these books is that you’ll know that they have mastered all the story words, as there are no picture clues. In addition, children will find the stories quite entertaining.

On the Dear Teacher website, you will be able to download free worksheets that accompany the word families stories to reinforce your children’s reading skills. Additionally, by entering in the keyword “rhyming,” you will find over three pages of columns that we have written explaining the importance of rhyming words for children.

Some of the articles you will find are: Helping First Grader Learn to Read Describing Phonemic Awareness Getting off to the Right Start in Reading How to Start Teaching Young Children to Read

Parents should send questions and comments to dearteacher@dearteacher.com or to the Dear Teacher website. ©Compass Syndicate Corporation, 2020

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DO GOOD. BETTER.

Research shows that young children learn to read faster if they are enjoying themselves. Using rhyming words to teach them to read definitely makes reading fun. All children love the rhyming word approach to learning to read. Also, rhyming words helps kids to develop phonemic awareness and learn how to break larger words into syllables.

Dear Teacher has done extensive research and developed apps that will teach your children to read using the fun rhyming word approach. By using Dear Teacher Skinny Books your children will start reading right away and quickly master basic phonics.

Go to dearteacher.com and you can link directly to the app store and your children will be learning to read with Skinny Books the Word Family Readers. There are two Skinny Book apps. The first app will help your kids learn to read more than 200 rhyming words and 37 basic sight words. The second app Skinny Books 2 will help them learn an additional 200 rhyming words and 18 new sight words. In addition, they will have

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Baptist Medical Group — River City Pediatrics has a dedicated team of board-certified pediatricians, certified lactation consultant (coming soon), and support staff providing personalized care for children of all ages. We listen to and work with families to understand the unique medical and developmental needs of each child.

While maintaining social distancing during this challenging time, our River City Pediatrics team continues to deliver compassionate care to our patients. We schedule well child check-up visits and immunization in the morning and reserve the afternoon for sick visits as needed. We work to eliminate wait time and minimize time spent in our clinic for everyone’s safety and protection. Fortunately, many pediatric concerns can be effectively handled while you and your family remain safely sheltered in your home through telephone consultation, e-visits and video visits. For more information please give us a call or visit us at www.rivercitypediatrics.org. and https://mychart.baptistonecare.org/PRD where you can activate your Mychart account to access your child’s health information, manage appointments, pay bills and more.

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F E AT U R E

TIPS FOR A HEALTHY PREGNANCY Ways to make those nine months go by smoother.

by Jamie Lober

A healthy pregnancy is never guaranteed, but the best thing you can do is seek prenatal care early. The American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists says that since health status and risk factors can change over time, pre-pregnancy counseling should take place several times during the reproductive years.

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2020

The purpose is for the woman to be as educated as possible and increase the chance of a positive outcome. Even chronic medical conditions like hypertension, diabetes, thyroid disease, and psychiatric illness can be managed so pregnancy goes smoother. Assessment for sexually transmitted infection screening also takes place at the time of counseling.

Communicate The more your doctor knows about your personal and family health history and lifestyle, the easier time he will have in guiding you. The American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists says that all patients should be routinely asked about their use of alcohol, nicotine products, and drugs, including prescription opioids and other medications used for non-medical reasons.

“If you are on prescription medications, you want to make sure it is something that will not harm the baby or else switch to something that you can take during pregnancy,” says Vicki Hardesty, executive director at Birthright. Folic acid supplementation should be discussed as well since it can reduce the risk of neural tube defects.

In addition to your healthcare provider, you want to communicate with friends and family and find out what their pregnancy was like. It is good to have this support and hear about others’ experiences, but you cannot compare, as no two pregnancies are alike. It can be equally beneficial to attend an early pregnancy childbirth class, read

books, or watch videos. Information is power.

The last one you want to communicate with is the baby inside of you. Lamaze International says that there is research showing that babies react to the sense of touch as early as 10 weeks of pregnancy, and a little later, the baby can react to light, voice, music, and other sounds.

Make Good Choices Nutrition makes a difference. “Start to get the right kinds of food so your body is stronger and cut back on fast foods and fried foods,” says Hardesty. The goal should be to have a colorful plate with lots of fruits and vegetables and fish (that is not raw) a few times a week for the baby’s brain growth and development. You want to eat healthy for life and not just for pregnancy. “Drink lots of water and avoid soft drinks and caffeine,” Hardesty says.

If you have an exercise routine, talk about it with your doctor to make sure it is safe to continue during pregnancy. If you were not exercising, consider swimming, walking, or a prenatal dance class. Lamaze International says that regular, moderate exercise makes labor shorter and less painful and decreases the risk for cesarean surgery.

Take Time for Yourself Maintain open communication with your partner and figure out the best ways to manage stress.

You may try deep breathing, yoga, or meditation.

Pregnancy is supposed to be a special time in your life, so you want to have faith in yourself, your body, and the journey.

A good attitude can go a long way. Never blame yourself, even if your pregnancy does not go as perfectly as you hope. “Some people cannot get pregnant, and some can; some have miscarriages, and others do not; sometimes it is genetic, sometimes it is lifestyle; sometimes it is lack of prenatal care or nutrition,” says Hardesty.

Be Patient The March of Dimes says that if your pregnancy is healthy, it is best to stay pregnant for at least 39 weeks and wait for labor to begin on its own.

You want your baby to have maximum time to develop, especially because the brain, lungs, liver, and other important organs are still developing in the last weeks of pregnancy. Babies born too early can have health problems at birth and later in life.

Seek Support It is important to stay calm and address any questions or concerns with your doctor. Let loved ones and close friends know that you are pregnant and tell them how they can help you. “It is important to have somebody in your life who is your support system and can be there for you,” says Hardesty.

You want to plan ahead. “Even after the baby is born, you need someone you can call and say you have not slept in three nights and are tired, frustrated, and need help.”

Jamie Lober, author of Pink Power (getpinkpower.com), is dedicated to providing information on women’s and pediatric health topics.

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F E AT U R E

MANAGING EAR INFECTIONS Exploring causes, effects, and treatment of this common illness.

M AY

2020

by Jamie Lober

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The American Academy of Pediatrics reports that middle ear infections, also known as otitis media, are one of the most common illnesses in U.S. children.

While it is usually obvious, parents should know the signs of trouble.

“Signs of a middle ear infection in a child may include redness, bulging, or a dull appearance of the eardrum, which can only be assessed by examining the ear with an otoscope or microscope,” says Dr. Paul Shea of Shea Ear Clinic. Drainage like pus or blood and fever are other red flags in kids.

Causes Ear infections can accompany colds, upper respiratory infections, or sinus infections. The outer ear infection, also known as swimmer’s ear, is also common, especially in summer. “In an outer ear infection, the ear canal as opposed to the middle ear is infected and may be swollen, tender, and painful,” Shea says. Treatment is antibiotic ear drops instead of oral antibiotics.

Colds and allergies can precipitate a middle ear infection. As for the cause, it is complicated. “Middle ear infections are thought to be caused by inadequately functioning Eustachian tubes because the tubes are too small or possibly congested by chronic allergies or infection,” says Shea. If this continues into adulthood, it is advised to seek guidance from an ear, nose, and throat doctor instead of the pediatrician or primary care provider.

Prevention Unfortunately, ear infections cannot be avoided in most cases. Keeping your kid home from daycare and not having contact with kids who may be sick is a good idea. Be sure to keep an eye on your child’s hearing.

Hearing screening is usually done at birth or at the first well-child visit. If you are not sure if your child’s hearing has been checked, ask the pediatrician. Sometimes schools check it as well. “The best indication on whether a child has normal hearing is his speech development, and it is a safe bet that if a child is talking normally by age 18 months to 2 years that he has near normal hearing in at least one ear,” says Shea. If a child is speech delayed or not saying words by age 18 months to 2 years, a hearing evaluation should be done by a qualified ear, nose, and throat doctor.

When to See the Doctor If your child presents ill by acting fussy, not eating or sleeping, becoming nauseous or vomiting, or not acting like himself, it is a good idea to see the doctor. If he only has a low-grade fever and is acting fine, he most likely does not need medical attention. Antibiotics have both pros and cons. “Antibiotics are generally indicated for an ear infection when a child is obviously ill, when there is infected or bloody material draining from the ear, or when the child is experiencing pain, high fever, or hearing loss,” says Shea. Overuse of antibiotics when they are not indicated has led to resistance in some cases.

Be sure to take ear infections seriously. If persistent and left untreated, it can affect a child’s speech. Early in life, this is the most vital. “If a child becomes speech delayed because of a hearing problem, it may be difficult for him to catch up before he reaches kindergarten and first grade,” Shea says.

The Bright Side You will be happy to know that most kids outgrow ear infections by the time they are 7 or 8 years old. “It is believed by 7 or 8 years old that a child’s head is almost fully grown and thus their Eustachian tube has reached adult size,” says Shea. The Eustachian tube is the opening between the middle ear and the back of the nose and its purpose is to provide ventilation and drainage for the middle ear, which is what you use to hear.

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PEDIATRIC DENTISTS Steven J. Fuson, DDS, MS Nathaniel Denson, DDS, MDS

What’s New Treatment for ear infections has not changed much over the past few decades. New antibiotics have been developed, but the first line of treatment remains the same, and those remedies have been around for many years. “Ventilation tubes are still recommended when a child has more than six infections in 12 months or when antibiotics are not able to eradicate middle ear fluid,” says Shea.

For kids with severe to profound hearing loss at birth, cochlear implantation gives them the ability to develop completely normal speech and begin school in a mainstream environment. “It is important that all children be screened for their hearing at birth or at the first well-child visit, which was mandated in Tennessee PEDIATRIC DENTISTS several years ago as it has been in virtually every other state in the country,” Steven J. Fuson, DDS, MS Nathaniel Denson, DDS, MDS Shea says.

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Management There are some things you can do to make your child more comfortable. “If he has a fever, a room-temperature bath is a good idea, and Tylenol can also help with pain and fever from an ear infection,” Shea says. If your child has a fever, refrain from giving aspirin, as it can cause a serious condition called Reye’s syndrome if he has a viral illness. “Amoxicillin is a good first-line choice, and amoxicillin/clavulanate or a cephalosporin are also commonly used,” Shea adds. With antibiotics, the ear infection typically resolves in a week or two.

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THE BEST GIFT FOR YOUR FAMILY IS YOUR BEST SELF M AY

2020

Don’t forget the importance of self-care.

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by Stephanie Pereira

You’ve heard how important self-care is and have probably even reminded yourself or a stressed friend of this necessity at one point or another in your parenting. But what are you supposed to do in unprecedented times?

You are told to practice social distancing, shelter in place, and you feel so uncertain of what the future holds that you may panic and kick into survival mode. How can you embrace the beautiful chaos as a mom during times like this?

You deserve to be on your to-do list. Your family is counting on you, and the only way to be your best for them is to take care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. It’s OK to take some time from your day and focus on yourself. You will be a better mom for it. You will be a better wife for it. You will be a better person for it. Your job is too important to only do halfway. It’s not enough to be there, merely going through the motions. You need to be there and really embrace yourself and your family in each moment.

Commit to yourself a small portion of time each day to take care of your needs. It’s not counterproductive. If you spend an hour each day, that’s less than 5 percent of your day spent doing something for yourself. It can include anything that makes you feel good, from reading, dancing, or painting to pampering yourself — anything that you truly enjoy doing.

You will get way more done from a place of feeling good and experiencing well-being than you ever could from having an empty cup.

There were many days when I was operating from an empty cup. I know that I was doing the best I could with what I was working with at that time in my life, but I’m very thankful to be in a better place now, and it just keeps getting better.

Option 1. Mom has a full cup (and I don’t mean a margarita!).

You took time earlier in the day to do something for yourself. You feel balanced and, at this moment, you have an easier time feeling the joy of your daughter freely dancing and singing in the kitchen. It’s easier for you to notice the beauty, the sparkle in her eyes as she peeks at you as she rounds the island for the thirty-fourth time. You not only see the magic of this moment but soak it up and cherish it. You know from your older kids that this phase flies by — and soon will just be a memory.

Option 2. Mom’s got an empty cup.

Things have been crazy. You didn’t have a chance to do anything that you wanted today. You still have so much to do and are feeling behind. You’re more easily annoyed by the song and become resentful that you’re cooking. You end up missing all of the goodness noted above. You might get pushed to the point of no return when you reprimand your daughter, saying something you don’t really mean (that she may never know or believe that you don’t mean).

In your irritation, you might send a message to her that you don’t like being around her if she is happy or enjoying herself, possibly guiding her indirectly to

dull her beautiful sparkle.

I didn’t intentionally make the second scenario as dramatic as possible, but I did want to point out the possible repercussions. Some of the things that have stuck with me the most are simple scenarios from my childhood when someone reacted and said something that indirectly affected me. No one intentionally said or did anything to dull my sparkle, but there were moments that led to that result.

As an adult, I now understand that those comments were never about me. They were merely a reaction of someone who wasn’t devoting time to themselves and who’d had a long, hard day and didn’t have a lot of patience for the 4-year-old in the room. The 4-year-old me didn’t always understand that, though.

Self-care has been a strong foundation for my days as a parent, and I’m so grateful I found it when I did. There were many days when I was operating from an empty cup. I know that I was doing the best I could with what I was working with at that time in my life, but I’m very thankful to be in a better place now, and it just keeps getting better.

In order to fully embrace the beautiful chaos of motherhood, we need to take care of ourselves. Our families will not only understand and make out OK, but they will be much better off when we are in a good place. You can be a better version of yourself when you are rested and taken care of. When you allow yourself to be a part of your daily routine, taking time to focus on yourself, you fill your cup.

This will probably look a little different each day, and that’s OK. Remember, it’s not what you’re doing that matters as much as the satisfaction it brings to you. Explore this idea of putting yourself back as a top priority and what it looks like for you by answering the following questions:

 What do I wish I had more time to do?  What would I like to do for myself in the following areas?

• Physical • Mental • Emotional • Educational • Creative/Self-expressive • Spiritual  Was there a time that I was on my to-do list?

What did I do? How did I feel? Do I miss that?  How do I feel when I am not on my to-do list consistently?

Now is your time to commit to taking back that firstpriority place for yourself. Give yourself permission for self-care. Place your hand over your heart and recite this aloud as many times as necessary: “I, (your name), give myself permission to be number-one on my to-do list and will make this time for myself: (number of days a week, hours a day, etc.), not only for me, but for everyone who I love and care for, so I can be a better version of myself for them.”

Now more than ever, we need to take care of ourselves in every way. In case no one has told you lately, you are a wonderful mom and your kiddos are lucky to have you. Go easy on yourself.

This story has been excerpted from Embrace the Beautiful Chaos of Motherhood: The Secret of Staying True to Yourself by Stephanie Pereira. If you’d like more information on this book, please visit embracethebeautifulchaos.com.

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Let’s run through a scenario together. It’s a Tuesday evening; you’re making dinner. Everyone has already expressed feeling hungry but is excited about the tacos you’re preparing. Your husband is away for the week, and you’re holding down the fort the best you can. Your adorable 4-year-old is prancing around the kitchen island, loudly singing the same line from the My Little Pony theme song over and over. There are two ways this could potentially go down:

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Each year, it seems the challenge for judges of the Memphis Parent Cover Kids contest gets more difficult.

This year, we had 40 entries to ooh and ahh over, and we let YOU decide. Thank you to all of the parents who submitted photos of their children. We truly wish we had space for all of these cutie pies! But we want to say congratulations to the five children selected to grace our covers. We are excited to introduce them to our readers over the next year.

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15MO-3Y ARI

N A ME U N AVA I L A B LE*

GABBY

RUBY

GUINNEVERE

GRANGE

SUTTON

N A ME U N AVA I L A B LE*

THANK YOU

PEACE*

4-6Y AERYN

M M AA YY 22 00 22 00

LUKAS

1166

GINO

PA I G E

TO ALL OF YO U !

JENNIE

HARMONY

TIA

AND A VERY SPECIAL

ROSALIE

SADIE

7-10Y BECKETT

DAPHNE

GABE

BRANDON

ROMAN

CHLOE

CHAMP*

N A ME U N AVA I L A B LE*

*Some names were unavailabe at the time of printing due to an error. These names will be corrected when published online.

PARENT STAFF

HEALTHCARE BEST PEDIATRICIAN

1st Pediatrics East 2nd Laurelwood Pediatrics 3rd Pediatric Consultants

BEST ORTHODONTIST

1st Saddle Creek Orthodontics 2nd Memphis Orthodontic Specialists: Stanley and Scott Werner 3rd Parris Orthodontics

EDUCATION BEST DAYCARE CENTER

1st Memphis Jewish Community Center 2nd Calvary Place Child Care Tie 3rd Collierville Christian Academy Tie 3rd St. Francis of Assisi Catholic Church

BEST PARENTS DAY OUT PROGRAM

1st Burriss Pediatric Dentistry 2nd Pediatric Dental Group & Orthodontics 3rd Dentristy for Children

1st St. Francis of Assisi Catholic School 2nd Mullins United Methodist Church 3rd Memphis Jewish Community Center

BEST PEDIATRIC ASTHMA & ALLERGY SPECIALIST

BEST PARENTS NIGHT OUT PROGRAM

BEST PEDIATRIC DENTIST

1st McCulley Allergy, Sinus & Asthma Center 2nd Hanissian Allergy: Gregory A. Hanissian, MD 3rd Daher Asthma and Allergy Clinic

1st Kid Station 2nd YMCA 3rd Code Ninjas

BEST PRESCHOOL

1st St. Francis of Assisi Catholic School 2nd Woodland Presbyterian School 3rd Memphis Jewish Community Center

BEST PUBLIC SCHOOL

1st Richland Elementary School 2nd Grahamwood Elementary School 3rd White Station High School

BEST THEATER PROGRAM

BEST PRIVATE SCHOOL

1st St. Francis of Assisi Catholic School 2nd Playhouse on the Square 3rd Germantown Community Theatre

BEST MUSIC LESSONS

1st Woodland Presbyterian Church 2nd St. Francis of Assisi Catholic School 3rd St. Benedict at Auburndale

1st St. Benedict at Auburndale 2nd Woodland Presbyterian School 3rd St. Francis of Assisi Catholic School 1st Howard Vance Guitar Academy 2nd Music for Aardvarks 3rd School of Rock Memphis

BEST DANCE LESSONS

Tie 1st Collage Dance Collective Tie 1st Dance Academy of Bartlett 2nd Children’s Ballet Theater 3rd Studio B Dance

BEST SPORTS PROGRAM

BEST SPORTS LESSONS

1st Autumn Chase Farm 2nd Memphis HappyFeet/ Legends LLC Tie 3rd Memphis Jewish Community Center Tie 3rd YMCA at Schilling Farms

BEST TUTORING SERVICE

1st Tutor Memphis 2nd Mathnasium 3rd Bowie Reading & Learning Center

MEM PH I SPA R ENT.COM

EMPHIS COMPILED BY M

Memphis Parent is a great resource for families. But you, our readers, also have insider secrets on what to do, where to go, and who to see for this and that in Memphis, Germantown, Collierville, Cordova, Millington, and all places in between.

After culling through scores of entries, the results are in from the 2020 Family Choice Awards, which puts the spotlight on places that you say are the best of the best around town.

Thank you for your votes, and congratulations to all of the winners of the Family Choice Awards!

17

FA M I LY

C H O I C E

AWA R D S

GET OUT THERE BEST FREE FAMILY OUTING

1st Shelby Farms Park 2nd Levitt Shell 3rd Memphis Zoo

BEST FAMILY DAY TRIP

BEST OVERNIGHT SUMMER CAMP

1st Lakeshore Camp & Retreat Center 2nd Pinecrest Camp 3rd Camp Bear Track

BEST SUMMER CAMP

1st Tennessee Safari Park 2nd Discovery Park of America 3rd Memphis Zoo

1st Easel Town 2nd Woodland Presbyterian School 3rd St. Francis of Assisi Catholic School

BEST FIELD TRIP FOR KIDS

BEST RECREATIONAL OUTING FOR FAMILIES

1st Memphis Zoo 2nd Pink Palace Museum 3rd National Civil Rights Museum

BEST HIKING SPOT FOR KIDS

1st Shelby Farms Park 2nd Memphis Zoo 3rd High Point Climbing and Fitness

BEST FAMILY FUN RUN

1st St. Jude Kids Marathon 2nd Forrest Spence Fund 3rd LeBonheur Children’s Hospital Pumpkin Run

BEST ANNUAL EVENT FOR FAMILIES

1st Memphis Moms Blog Hanging with Heroes 2nd Germantown Festival 3rd Memphis Italian Festival

BEST TOURIST ATTRACTION

1st Memphis Zoo 2nd National Civil Rights Museum 3rd Graceland

1st Shelby Farms Park 2nd Meeman-Shelby Forest State Park 3rd Overton Park

TASTY EATS BEST KID-FRIENDLY RESTAURANT

1st Huey’s 2nd Chick-fil-A 3rd Belly Acres

BEST DATE NIGHT RESTAURANT (W/O KIDS)

1st Southern Social 2nd Flight Restaurant and Wine Bar 3rd Texas de Brazil

2020

1st Cotton Tails 2nd Spoiled Sweet Boutique 3rd Itty Bitty Bella

BEST KIDS’ CONSIGNMENT SHOP

1st Once Upon a Child 2nd Summer Kids 3rd KidsTown

BEST LOCAL STORE FOR BABY GIFTS

1st Cotton Tails 2nd Itty Bitty Bella 3rd Spoiled Sweet Boutique

BEST SALON FOR KIDS’ HAIRCUTS

BEST BBQ

1st Gould’s Salon Spa 2nd Eden Spa & Laser 3rd Germantown Day Spa

1st Village Toymaker 2nd Knowledge Tree 3rd Cotton Tails

BEST SPA FOR MOM (OR DAD)

BEST FAMILY FITNESS CENTER

1st YMCA of Memphis & the Mid-South 2nd Salvation Army Kroc Center 3rd Germantown Athletic Club

BEST CHILD CARE AT A FITNESS CENTER

1st YMCA of Memphis & the Mid-South 2nd Salvation Army Kroc Center 3rd Memphis Jewish Community Center

BEST GROUP FITNESS PROGRAM

BEST KIDS’ MENU

1st Salvation Army Kroc Center 2nd YMCA of Memphis & the Mid-South 3rd Orangetheory Fitness

BEST MEAL-TO-GO

PARTY SERVICES

1st Huey’s 2nd Chick-fil-A 3rd Belly Acres

1st Chick-fil-A 2nd Taziki’s Mediterranean Cafe 3rd Lucchesi’s Ravioli & Pasta Company

BEST LOCAL TOY SHOP

FAMILY SERVICES

BEST LOCAL PIZZERIA

1st Central BBQ 2nd Germantown Commissary 3rd Corky’s Ribs & BBQ

M AY

BEST LOCALLY OWNED CHILDREN’S STORE

1st Pigtails & Crewcuts 2nd Gould’s Salon Spa 3rd 1776 Men’s Grooming Parlor

1st Memphis Pizza Cafe 2nd Aldo’s 3rd Broadway Pizza

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SHOPPING

BEST KIDS’ PARTY DESTINATION

1st Easel Town 2nd Imagine Nation Playcenter 3rd Pump It Up

BEST KIDS’ PARTY ENTERTAINMENT

1st Incredible Pizza 2nd Easel Town 3rd Music for Aardvarks

BEST LOCAL BAKERY

1st Muddy’s Bake Shop 2nd Frost Bake Shop 3rd Smallcakes Bartlett

Immanuel Lutheran School Built on FAITH Together as FAMILY Preparing for the FUTURE

Pre-K3 – 8th grade

SIGN UP BEFORE MAY 2020 TO GET 20% DISCOUNT!

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M E M PH I SPA R ENT.COM

Thank you to healthcare workers across the Mid-South!

Your child deserves the best.

19

F E AT U R E

AVOIDING EXCESSIVE SCREEN TIME A doctor speaks on the harmful effects and tips on curbing them.

by Julia Baker

M AY 20

Dr. Steele says he started to become aware of the negative effects when he noticed an increase of patients coming into his office with significantly larger pupillary sizes.

“I used to see maybe one congenitally large pupil a semester,” he says.

“Now I’m seeing five or six a day.”

At first, he attributed this issue to the use of prescribed attention-deficit/ hyperactivity disorder medications.

But he found out that many of his patients weren’t on medications of any kind. “So I started looking at other things, and sometimes things just dawn on you,” he says.

“One day, I happened to go into a room for an exam on a young child, and he was there on his device. And he was playing with it. It took me a minute or two just to get his attention away from the device. When he looked up at me, his pupils were huge.”

He started surveying other parents whose children were exhibiting large pupils, and they all confirmed that their children spent way too much time on

their devices. From there, Steele realized that he had to dig deeper into the effects of device use on children.

“The more I looked at that, the more I began to read outside of just eye care and look at a lot of the things that people were seeing with kids who were on devices,” he says. “And one of the things that just shocked me was, there’s an article that shows that increased screen time by 24 months of age shows poor responses on developmental screening tests at 36 months of age.”

Steele says that these responses can include reductions in fine motor skills, vocabulary and communication skills, eye contact, decision making, and cognitive control, as well as an increase in ADHD symptoms.

The good news for families isolated in their homes during the pandemic is that children don’t need to cut out screen time completely. Rather, they should follow a few guidelines and tips to maintain children’s health and growth.

“We can’t take them away, because

our future is going to be based on that,” he says. “So my goal in working with parents and patients is to try to get them to understand the importance of taking a break.”

Steele recommends that children take breaks from their screen every few minutes, preferably every five minutes for toddlers and preschoolers and every 10 minutes for older children. To do this, he suggests using a timer or a screen time monitoring app like Zift, Screen Time, or Qustodio.

“They don’t even have to get up and move around,” he says. “Even just looking up and looking around will break that intense use of the device.”

During breaks, Steele recommends that parents check the size of their child’s pupils. “The larger they are, the more often and more consistently parents need to reinforce [taking a break],” he says.

Steele also recommends ways of handling devices so that children aren’t looking too close at the screen, which can cause problems with depth perception, headaches, eye discomfort, and possibly even myopia (nearsightedness). “So many kids bring them up so very close, but the hand that is holding the device needs to be in their lap,” he says.

Steele references guidelines written in the World Health Organization’s 2019 “Physical activity, sedentary behavior and sleep for children

under 5 years of age,” which states that children should not be introduced to sedentary screen time until they are 2 years old and that children ages 2-4 should not receive more than one hour of screen time a day.

“Kids are not moving, and the kids are on their devices, and the younger they start on the device, the greater the potential for long-term complications and consequences,” he says.

Steele recommends plenty of movement and play wherever and whenever possible — while keeping a safe distance during this time — including running, throwing, and catching.

He also suggests searching online for screen-free activities and games kids and families can play.

Steele emphasizes that, while he’s certainly not suggesting taking screen time out of children’s lives, he wants to bring awareness and provide guidelines to parents so they know how to best mitigate the risks of overexposure.

“On the one hand, we need to embrace, but on the other hand, we need to use caution,” he says. “We’re in a stage where we don’t know how they’re going to evolve over time. It is so widespread and there are so many different professions that are reporting on the consequences out there. So I want to be proactive and give guidelines and support for parents to be able to help their kids.”

P H OTO G R A P H Y B Y B R YA N R O L L I N S

2020

Just before the COVID-19 pandemic, Dr. Glen Steele, a professor at the Southern College of Optometry in the Pediatric Service, gave a lecture on the negative effects excessive device use can have on children, which include vision impairment, as well as negative impacts on social, psychological, and physical development.

O U T S TA N D I N G

T E AC H E R

by Julia Baker

JOY COPOUS

Copous, who teaches Pre-K3 at Immaculate Conception Cathedral School, derived her inspiration for teaching early on from her mother, who was a third grade teacher. “She was an amazing role model,” says Copous. “I used to help her in her classroom, help organize her things, and just watch the creativity that she used with her students. And it just kind of inspired me to go out and teach creatively, not just through a bunch of worksheets and things like that.”

Although Copous had this strong role model growing up, her path as an educator wasn’t always clear to her until college. “For a little while, I thought that I might go into nursing, ultrasound, or something like that,” says Copous.

“But it just didn’t feel right until I went back to education and all of a sudden, things just clicked.”

She says that she enjoyed going to class and being around people with common interests, and when she began her student teaching at Kansas Elementary and Farmington Elementary, she felt like she belonged. “There were just so many hardships [at Kansas Elementary], and I felt like I was making a difference in their lives,” says Copous. “And Farmington was just amazing. I felt accepted by both groups.”

She student-taught first grade at those schools and was offered a permanent job at Farmington, but she turned that down to work with younger kids because she wanted to reach kids at an earlier age to show them that learning can be fun, not scary.

“My thought was if I can change their perspective early, then maybe as they get to

those older grades, they will feel they’ll be more prepared, and they’ll already have that love of school and not be afraid of the learning,” says Copous.

Copous uses a hands-on approach with her students, often using music, art, and play to help students learn multiple concepts at once. “Most of the lessons that we have teach a variety of things in that same lesson,” she says. “We teach things that look really really simple.”

One of her latest lessons involved having students paint with melting ice cubes that had food coloring in them so they could learn about the different properties of water while learning fine motor skills. “Even at a 3-year-old level, learning can be deeper than most people think,” she says.

One of Copous’ and her students’ favorite lessons, however, is the fruit bowl, or stone soup, lesson, where students are each asked to bring in a small baggie of fruit to put in a large bowl and share with the entire class. During this lesson, students learn about sharing, colors, recipes, and measurements. “That’s just a fun, multifaceted thing that we do,” says Copous. “It also creates teamwork and teaches character-building.”

Copous says she is impressed with how much her students, many of whom are learning four languages, can absorb. “I’ve had several students come to me not able to speak in English,” she says. “And at our school we teach Spanish three days a week, and I teach them sign language. So they might have come in only speaking Chinese or Vietnamese or something like that, and within a couple of months, they’re saying words in

Spanish and English and still being able to communicate with their parents in their native tongue. They certainly learn languages faster than I do.”

Copous credits her principal, Karen Gephart, for being supportive and allowing her to think outside the box with her lesson plans. “She has allowed us to sort of rewrite the curriculum,” says Copous. “We are a Catholic school, so we do teach religion every day. But instead of just teaching it out of the book, she’s allowed me to teach it in a fun and innovative way.”

Copous says she has learned a lot in her 20 years of teaching, like learning to find a good balance with her partners and assistants, but most importantly, she’s learned adaptability from making learning fun for her students.

“I think I learn something every day,” she says.

“Being able to adapt when this project or this lesson isn’t going well. I’ll say, ‘Let’s just switch gears,’ and if they’re really leaning toward this other thing, we can tie it in to what we’re learning.

It’s just going with the flow, because every class is different.”

Copous offers a few pieces of advice to other teachers. “I would definitely say be willing to try new things, but don’t be afraid to fail,” she says.

“Failing doesn’t make you a failure. What makes you successful is if you can have a lesson that doesn’t work and then recover from it. Also, dream. The kids want to dream with you. Be sincere with the children, because they can tell when you’re not. They’re really good judges of character, sometimes better than most adults.

Most importantly, smile and love them.”

We want to shine a light on your child’s teacher, or even a teacher who made a difference in your life.

Submit your nomination today by emailing teacher@memphisparent.com.

M E M PH I SPA R ENT.COM

Parents always hope to find educators who can bring about a sense of joy during their children’s school days, and one of our readers has found this in Joy Copous, not just in her name, but in her level of care with her students, describing her as the “personification of love, hope, and joy” in all of her children.

21

DA D

L I B S

with Jeff Hulett

MY BABIES AREN’T BABIES ANYMORE Leaning into a season of independence and growth.

M J AANYU A 2 0R2Y0 2 0 2 0

Years ago, eight years ago in fact, Memphis Parent held a “Baby Fashionista” contest that I entered my Ella into. It was at a time where things were slower, simpler, and dare I say, more orderly.

Schedules were on point, and we were locked into them. Naps happened twice a day, dinner was at a consistent hour, and bedtime occurred at the same time each night.

Not to mention, I could always count on some sweet and snuggly cuddling at the end of a long day.

Now Ella is 8 years old and my youngest is 5, and while Beatrice is down to wrestle and give daddy a big smooch from time to time, both girls are more and more independent and less inclined to want to cuddle these days. I long for the days when I could just hold them with one arm and do so effortlessly. The other day I was holding Ella and she almost hit her head on the ceiling! They’re growing like weeds, I tell you.

While I’m a little sad about these new developments in growth and independence, I think it’s important to recognize and respect personal space. If one of my jobs as a parent is to teach my kids appropriate boundaries, I need to be the first one to listen and hear them when they say they are good and don’t want a hug or high five. There seems to be some perpetuating expectation that all kids should hug their relatives or close friends, when in truth, that’s the opposite of what we should be doing and encouraging them to do.

I get it, when I get home from work and my kids run into my arms, there’s literally nothing better, but when I get home and they don’t, it’s not time to force affection. As parents, we should be sending the message to our children that personal space and boundaries are theirs to set.

And conversely, if our kids want to cuddle us and we don’t want to, we should be letting them know our boundaries as well. It’s a two-way street, and one that should be modeled regularly.

The bright side of this is two-fold. First, our kids are growing up and don’t need us for every little thing anymore. There was a time when I couldn’t even sit down for a hot cup of coffee without hearing “mommy” or “daddy” every two seconds.

Secondly, there are other ways to connect and be close with your children.

Lately, I’ve been finding comfort in playing board games and jumping on the trampoline with my girls. The main thing is that we are spending time together and bonding. If you put in the time, there is so much payoff. And admit it, it’s fun to monkey around and roughhouse. It keeps us parents young.

Jeff Hulett is a freelance writer, musician, and PR consultant in Memphis.

He lives in the Vollintine Evergreen neighborhood with his wife Annie, two girls Ella and Beatrice, and two dogs Chalupa and Princess Freckles.

22

YOUR CHILD SHOULD BE HERE!

M E M PH I SPA R ENT.COM

Send us your kid funnies, photos, or artwork via email with Favorite Moments in the subject line to shara@memphisparent.com

23

You want what’s best for your kids.

That’s us.

Now more than ever, you can trust the experts at Le Bonheur Children’s Hospital to provide the best care for your children.

Our nationally recognized health care heroes are here for you, and there’s no substitute for the care and expertise you will find at Le Bonheur.

When it matters most, look to Le Bonheur.

Where Every Child Matters lebonheur.org/coronavirus