Memphis Flyer 12.10.15

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The Snarkiest Man in Memphis The life and times of Wonkette writer and Memphian Evan Hurst.

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OUR 1398TH ISSUE 12.10.2015 LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

DESHAUNE MCGHEE Classified Advertising Manager BRENDA FORD Classified Sales Administrator classifieds@memphisflyer.com LYNN SPARAGOWSKI Distribution Manager ROBBIE FRENCH Warehouse and Delivery Manager BRANDY BROWN, JANICE GRISSOM ELLISON, ZACH JOHNSON, KAREN MILAM, RANDY ROTZ, LOUIS TAYLOR WILLIAM WIDEMAN Distribution THE MEMPHIS FLYER is published weekly by Contemporary Media, Inc., 460 Tennessee Street, Memphis, TN 38103 Phone: (901) 521-9000 | Fax: (901) 521-0129 letters@memphisflyer.com www.memphisflyer.com CONTEMPORARY MEDIA, INC. KENNETH NEILL Chief Executive Officer MOLLY WILLMOTT Chief Operating Officer JEFFREY GOLDBERG Director of Business Development BRUCE VANWYNGARDEN Editorial Director KEVIN LIPE Digital Manager LYNN SPARAGOWSKI Distribution Manager JACKIE SPARKS-DAVILA Events Manager KENDREA COLLINS Marketing/Communications Manager BRITT ERVIN Email Marketing Manager ASHLEY HAEGER Controller JOSEPH CAREY IT Director CELESTE DIXON Receptionist

National Newspaper Association

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CHO CES

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1726 Poplar Avenue Memphis, TN 38104 901/274-3550 www.memphischoices.org

Tiger Blue The Flyer’s MeMphis Tiger Blog

www.memphisflyer.com/blogs/TigerBlue/

Tiger Blue THE FLYER’S MEMPHIS BLOG

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m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

CARRIE O’GUIN HOFFMAN Advertising Operations Manager JERRY D. SWIFT Advertising Director Emeritus KELLI DEWITT, CHIP GOOGE Senior Account Executives SHAWNA GARDNER , ALEX KENNER Account Executives CRISTINA MCCARTER Sales Assistant

In the 14 years I’ve been the Flyer editor, I’ve gotten lots of hate mail. It mostly used to come in envelopes filled with pages of scrawled handwriting. I read them and put them in the wastebasket, chalking it up as a natural by-product of writing for a liberal paper in the conservative South. Lately, the angry folks have switched to email, and it comes in waves.

My last column about Donald Trump, for example, drew notes from folks who, like Trump, had seen the Muslims in New Jersey celebrating 9/11 on television. A couple of the writers threatened to come “look me up” and “straighten me out” about my “lies” about their hero. Nice.

The angry, crazy xenophobes have always been with us. You don’t have to look to the Spanish Inquisition or Nazi Germany for examples. In the U.S. the Irish, Catholics, Jews, and African Americans have all been targets of racism and discrimination through the decades. The enslavement of black Americans is a permanent stain on our history, as is the institutional racism that persisted long after the Civil War. Dylann Roof read white supremacist literature that falsely claimed African Americans were killing whites at a high rate. (Trump recently retweeted similar false statistics.) Roof took his revenge at a church in South Carolina. Robert Lewis Dear was spouting antiabortion rhetoric to police after his murderous rampage in Colorado Springs. The two Islamist terrorists who killed 14 innocent people in San Bernardino last week had been radicalized by ISIS’ loathesome doctrine of hatred.

Hate and ignorance comes in all colors.

Does anyone doubt that we’ll see a new surge of anti-Muslim violence in the U.S. in the wake of the California attack and Trump’s fascistic response to demonize all Muslims? I don’t. And so it goes. We ramp up the anger and inevitable violence in the U.S., giving more propaganda ammunition to Muslim extremists. Trump is playing his followers right into their hands.

And we just keep upping the ante. The president is called a “pussy” on Fox News, and worse on countless websites. Not even his wife and children are spared. I pray his security team is on full alert. I researched a couple of my emailers (yeah, I have your IP address) and found white supremacist websites that are terrifying. We can only hope the feds are monitoring them.

Yes, the hateful xenophobes and racists have always been there, but now we’re all connected via social media, so we’re exposed like never before to viewpoints N E WS & O P I N I O N that are an affront to human decency.

LETTERS - 4 “Unfriending” on Facebook is rampant, THE TIMES CROSSWORD PUZZLE - 4 assuring that we silo ourselves even THE FLY-BY - 6 further into echo chambers for our own SPORTS - 10 beliefs. And sensationalist media coverage POLITICS - 12 EDITORIAL - 14 just keeps turning up the heat. The annual VIEWPOINT - 15 “War on Christmas” insanity has become COVER STORY as much a part of the season as mistletoe.

“THE SNARKIEST MAN IN Damn you, Starbucks, and your satanic MEMPHIS” BY BIANCA PHILLIPS - 16 cups. (I’m not buying that Christmas STE P P I N’ O UT blend, either.)

WE RECOMMEND - 22 “Happy Holidays!” How dare you? It’s MUSIC - 24 AFTER DARK - 26 “Merry Christmas,” you heathen.

THEATER - 30 Is there anything we can’t turn into a CALENDAR OF EVENTS - 32 reason to fight each other? I’m beginning FOOD - 37 to doubt it. My advice: Pray for peace and FILM - 41 prepare for anything.

THE LAST WORD - 47 Bruce VanWyngarden C L AS S I F I E D S - 43 brucev@memphisflyer.com

CONTENTS

CARRIE BEASLEY Senior Art Director CHRISTOPHER MYERS Advertising Art Director DOMINIQUE PERE, BRYAN ROLLINS Graphic Designers

Hep C

Screen $50

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BRUCE VANWYNGARDEN Editor SUSAN ELLIS Managing Editor JACKSON BAKER, MICHAEL FINGER Senior Editors BIANCA PHILLIPS Associate Editor CHRIS MCCOY Film and TV Editor CHRIS SHAW Music Editor CHRIS DAVIS, TOBY SELLS Staff Writers JENNY BRYANT, LESLEY YOUNG Copy Editors JULIE RAY Calendar Editor ALEXANDRA PUSATERI, MICAELA WATTS Editorial Interns

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The 2016

What They Said...

Memphis magazine

Letters and comments from Flyer readers

Fiction Contest

GREG CRAVENS

Who cares how he got his money or whether he can dunk a ball or hang by his hair from the Brooklyn Bridge. He is beyond unqualified, and his popularity evidences America’s huge, bloated underbelly.

CL Mullins

$1,000 GRAND PRIZE

TWO $500 HONORABLE MENTION PRIZES* DEADLINE: February ENTRY FEE: $10

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The Trump joke is on us: a) scion of a moneyed and connected family; b) Ivy League B-school product; c) second-generation wealth via speculation (Manhattan real estate); d) more wealth via avarice (casinos); e) circus (reality TV star).

All the while, he presents himself as a “populist.” Only in America!

Jrgolden

per story

Sponsored by:

BURKE’S BOOK STORE • BOOKSELLERS AT LAURELWOOD MEMPHIS MAGAZINE

About the editorial, “The Whirlwind” …

I get the correlation between “Christianist” and “jihadist,” suddenly. But if you’re going to press the analogy, you’ll need someone other than Robert Dear. The jihadists whose pictures appear in the media don’t look like they’ve spent their lives away from church in a trailer in the woods.

Brunetto Latini

About Kenneth Neill’s Viewpoint, “Damned Statistics” …

Implying that the City of Memphis and the Memphis Metropolitan Statistical Area are congruent is just wrong. Using it to try and make the point that Memphis is safer is dishonest. Perhaps the city is safer. If so, use an apples-to-apples comparison to demonstrate it.

Arlington Pop

for rules and further details, EMAIL RICHARD@MEMPHISMAGAZINE .COM York Times Syndication Sales Corporation The New OR GO TO MEMPHISMAGAZINE.COM , Eighth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10018 620 AND CLICK ON FICTION CONTEST. For Information Call: 1-800-972-3550

For Release Monday, April 27, 2015 *Honorable mentions awarded only if quality of entries warrants.

Those who are concerned about young-

The New York Times Syndication Sales Corporation 620 Eighth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10018 For Information Call: 1-800-972-3550 For Release Monday, May 11, 2015

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I think the city has many positive aspects.

It could be a great city. However the negative aspects overwhelm the positive aspects. It isn’t an either/or proposition.

You may wish it so. You may demand it so.

You may imply anything you like. Reality, on the other hand, remains.

Ichabod McCrane

Edited by Will Shortz

The owners of this country want those violent games, movies, TV, etc., promulgated. Helps recruit and inure to the idea No. 0406 64 Boat withofakilling their armed 1 forces 2 who 3 defend 4 double-bladed their global interests, er, our country. paddle Packrat 14

Edited by Will Shortz Crossword 34 Frequently, ACROSS to a ACROSS 39 Stone Age tool 68 First light … or poet a phenomenon 1 Ang for 1LeeActor 40 Garment suggested by this film about a a gymnast or puzzle’s seven shipwrecked boy superhero and a Malcolm-___ tiger sets of circled 37 1977 hard42 Yellowstone Park letters?

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20 67 Long, hard look Indian tribe 47 Computer’s 3 Physicist Enrico and rip a person’ s body to shreds. You “brain,” for short 17 Drinkslove for 007 4 Approximate no.

48 Relatives of violas 18 McCartney’s don’t know where the next attack or ram42 Puts the 5 Inventor whose songwriting 50 Short-term office partner worker often success went up 11 Sandwich 23 page is going to occur, but you can be sure and down?

19 “A Nightmare on 54 Second-largest whammy on ___ Street” 6 Comic Sans, e.g. city in Kenya DOWN on toasted bread it is going to involve guns.

20 Disco ___ of 7 Green car that 58 Football “The Simpsons” six-pointers, for comes in 43 many Display model have 26 created 27 hundreds 28 21 Hoity-toity type short colors 1 One might Republicans start 14 Way 22 Narrow opening overweight 61 Damage 8 Chats online, for of new laws that restrict and reduce 24 The “S” of WASP 62 Question at the short “Knock knock …” around the country.ac-So 44 “Terrible” end of a riddle 26 “It’s allLetter-shaped about 9 Like jack-o’cess to abortions 15 me” trait 30 63 Coke Zero or lanterns or Pepsi One Russian autocrat 29 “That’s amazing!” meaningless why can’t 2 “___ to leap tallthey create even one new law to building support victories rival 30 Icelandic literary 65 Boeing saga 66 Release, as a 10 ___ a million alleviate that is gripping the buildings …” the madness 34 Fell apart 33 Samberg in 44 “You’ve got mail” 56 A.M. hours, (slim odds) 46 Age, and not try 37 16 ofseatbelt poetry co. formerly of 38 Hymn Note of praise 67 “It’spromise true!” country.

Why do Republicans continue to 11 Something a “S.N.L.” camper pitches to hide it 46 Not succumb to 57 ___ inTimid the woods 3 34 Network for 48 French author ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE block gun legislation when surveys show or iPad 17 Compulsion to 12 iPod Albert business news variety 41 49 Singer Turner’s 59 Openly challenge Americans support stricter laws on 35 Trompe l’___ 13 Wedding 48 vows Miniskirts autobiography steal 4 Egyptian that cobra 36 Take off, as 14 “Why ___ we be 51 Be melodramatic 60 Attack with a guns?

Follow the money. weight friends?” or37 “The oversize knife Last of ___” 52 Title character of Tyler Perry films 19 Baby bear 21 Book after RLoweof a (1973 murder 5 Like the bite 44 45 mystery) Genesis 53 April fool, e.g.

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sters growing up inundated virtually 24/7 by violent video games, violent movies, violent TV shows, violent music lyrics, violent comic books, violent sports, and excuses for violent crime are ridiculed.

ALJ2

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About Bianca Phillips’ story, “Majority of Uninsured15 Tennesseans Live in Shelby County” …

If you18 look at the Tennessee legislature, you’ll see that approximately 75 percent of Democrats in the House and Senate 21 are black people from Shelby County. 15 percent are old-school, white Southern 25 Democrats from Nashville, and24 the last 10 percent are black people not from Memphis, with the occasional oddball 29 Democrat from the middle of nowhere.

That tells31 you all need to know 32you 33 about why the state suppresses Memphis and Shelby County. If I was a 38 39 Republican who viewed Democrats as the enemy, keeping a foot on the neck 42 of Memphis would be my first step toward maintaining Republican control of Tennessee.

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Well, that explains why our legislators don’t want to expand Medicare. Anything 54 County is going to be at that helps Shelby the bottom of their list.

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THE

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ly on the wall

FUN WITH SCANNERS Be sure to check out @ScannerMemphis, a Twitter account devoted to sharing the “highlights and lowlights from the Memphis and Shelby County police and fire scanners.” Some sample tweets: “Intoxicated woman taking pictures of Taco Bell on Elvis Presley. Says she works for the corporate office, but she has a beer,” “Man is threatening to stab his television,” and your Pesky Fly’s personal favorite: “Car is on top of a fire hydrant and is on fire at this time.”

IN THE STREET Fly on the Wall would like to thank The Commercial Appeal for all of its St. Jude marathon coverage. Especially this handy little map of everybody’s favorite street, Popular Avenue.

Questions, Answers + Attitude

A Jesus Issue

Edited by Bianca Phillips

{

CITY REPORTER B y To b y S e l l s

Memphis evangelicals say fear has driven Tennessee’s response to the Syrian refugee situation.

Some Memphis evangelicals say keeping Syrian refugees out of Tennessee goes against the Bible, but Nashville lawmakers met this week to see how it jives with state law.

A group local evangelicals and immigration leaders met in Memphis last week and agreed that Christians should embrace all refugees and immigrants as they are “human beings made in the image of God and are all loved and valued by God” and that “you should love your neighbor as you love yourself.”

But state lawmakers sought a finer point on the matter, meeting this week in Nashville to review the policies, logistics, safety, and more questions that surround the Syrian refugee settlement.

Conversations about refugee settlement in the state rose in the wake of the November terrorist attack in Paris and President Barack Obama’s call to settle 10,000 Syrian refugees in the United States. Governors of many states, including Tennessee, said they wanted to pause Syrian refugee placement in their states.

“We as a state must do everything we can to provide Tennesseans the safe environment to live, work, and raise a family that so many across the world seek,” Tennessee

Live at the Garden

Governor Bill Haslam said in a statement at the time.

Last month, three Democratic lawmakers asked Tennessee Attorney General (AG) Herbert H. Slatery III whether or not the state legislature or the governor could deny refugees entry here even if they’d passed background checks and been given refugee status by the federal government. They also asked if the state or governor could deny refugees settlement in Tennessee based solely on a refugee’s country of origin or based solely on their religion.

“More people die in the state of Tennessee from cholesterol than terrorism acts.” — Mauricio Calvo Slatery summed up his opinion in a word: “No.” Doing so would violate the Constitution’s supremacy clause, which says federal law is the supreme law of the land. The president determines how many refugees will be admitted to the U.S. each year, Slatery wrote. But he also pointed to a 2011 state law, called the “Refugee Absorptive Capacity Act,” which could (with federal approval) stem the flow of refugees into a Tennessee community that cannot

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S POTLI G HT

By Alexandra Pusateri

December 10-16, 2015

The USDA pays a visit to Treadwell Middle School’s community garden.

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NEVERENDING ELVIS The Belfast Telegraph, a daily newspaper published in Northern Ireland, tells a strange story about an awkward bathroom encounter between “What’s Up Pussycat” crooner Tom Jones, who was fully naked, and Elvis Presley, who was naked from the waist down. According to the Telegraph, Jones was in the shower when Elvis dropped by to pitch a song. As it happens, the King needed to take care of a little business himself, so he joined Jones in the bathroom, where he proceeded to perform his song while sitting on the toilet. “I’m trying to towel down, and Elvis is singing,” Jones was quoted as saying. “So I’m naked, and he’s half-naked; his pants are down by his ankles.” The report notes that Elvis called his bodyguard and assistant Red West into the bathroom to help him back into a pair of leather pants.

By Chris Davis. Email him at davis@memphisflyer.com.

A group of students at Treadwell Middle School are getting a hands-on education in agriculture, nutrition, and the importance of community and teamwork through their school’s community garden. And that’s caught the attention of the federal government.

The school’s use of urban gardening as a learning tool and outreach program opened the door for a visit last week from Ann Bartuska, the deputy under secretary for the Department of Agriculture’s research, education, and economics programs.

She’s part of a task force to promote and advance urban gardening, and that brought her to Memphis to tour gardens at Treadwell, Jones Orchard, and Knowledge Quest, among others.

“It was very obvious that kids needed something else besides just sitting in the classroom.” — Daniel DeShon

“We’ve been trying to put [the Department of Agriculture’s programs] all together in urban areas because of the growth of interest and to respond to food deserts,” Bartuska said. “One way is through self-empowerment.

Another way is through teaching kids science, technology, engineering, and math through gardening. All of this seems to come together in an urban community garden-

type setting, so seeing these kinds of successes are really helpful.”

Daniel DeShon, a special education teacher, started the Green Thumbs 4H Garden Club at Treadwell more than two years ago. DeShon is a proponent of teaching kids about nutrition, which prompted the launch of the garden club.

That also prompted him to apply for a grant to install a salad bar in the cafeteria — one that would be filled with the bounties of the school’s community garden.

The 4-H and garden clubs at Treadwell joined forces for the garden. DeShon, who is also the adviser to the 4-H Club, was a horticulturalist for 30 years.

Brandasia Gooch, the president of the 4-H Club, loves working in the garden. (Her favorites are the strawberries and grapes.)

“I love to garden,” she said. “My auntie loves to garden, too. I love to practice in her yard. I just love it.”

The 4-H gardening club promotes parental involvement. Felisha Williams, Gooch’s mother, was a member of a 4-H Club when she was younger.

“I want her to go farther than I did, and I want her children to go farther than she did,” Williams said.

Nonprofits like The Kitchen Community have stepped in to help Treadwell with the community garden. The nonprofit donated raised garden beds and benches to create a complete outdoor educational environment. The

THE BEST

ENTERTAINMENT TOBY SELLS

IN TUNICA

A panel of evangelicals discuss the Biblical perspective on immigration.

THE TEMPTATIONS

RODNEY CARRINGTON

AARON LEWIS

RANDY HOUSER

MERLE HAGGARD

WANDA SYKES

On Sale This Friday at 10am

On Sale This Friday at 10am

ALEXANDRA PUSATERI

February 21

USDA’s Ann Bartuska (in the red jacket) meets with Treadwell students. garden has received grants from Lowe’s and Memphis City Beautiful, and it continues to grow.

“It was very obvious that kids needed something else besides just sitting in the classroom,” DeShon said. “At the first project we had, six kids showed up. When we have a project now, we have as many as 80 kids show up. It became quickly obvious when we started working outside on Saturdays, kids would start pouring out of houses from the neighborhood into where we were working. They really wanted something to do. They were looking for something to do besides sit inside and play video games.”

These days, instead of watching basketball and football games together on Friday nights, many residents of the neighborhood around Treadwell are building up the community garden for everyone to enjoy.

“This is the power of community gardens,” Bartuska said. “It becomes a gathering place.”

March 5

February 20

February 27

March 18

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m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

December 29

NEWS & OPINION

support them.

Still, lawmakers scheduled a Wednesday meeting to hear from members of the state AG’s office, a fellow from conservative think tank The Heritage Foundation, representatives of the Tennessee Department of Safety and Homeland Security and the Tennessee National Guard, and the director of Catholic Charities of Tennessee, which oversees the state’s refugee program.

But instead of threats from refugees, state officials should be more concerned about fried chicken, said Mauricio Calvo, executive director of Latino Memphis.

“More people die in the state of Tennessee from cholesterol than terrorism acts,” Calvo said.

Calvo’s statement came in a panel discussion last week at Memphis Leadership Foundation that brought together evangelical pastors and leaders who work with refugees and immigrants in Memphis.

Steve Moses, director of the refugee service nonprofit World Relief Memphis, said lawmakers have made the Syrian refugee situation a “security issue, not a Jesus issue.”

“We’re driven by fear and not by love,” Moses said. “The world sees that.

They’re talking about us as well, how we’re responding versus other countries … that are taking in hundreds of thousands of people and telling them ‘We will help you.’”

7

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Toby Sells (right center) and his relay team

I am not ready. But I’m going to do this anyway. Those two thoughts were constant billboards in my mind Saturday morning as I waited for the beginning of the St. Jude Memphis Marathon.

I was running the relay, so my part was only around six miles. But I hadn’t run regularly for a while and hoped that my recent efforts at the gym would somehow (somehow) see me through.

Thousands of bodies swelled around the starting line close to Union and Second. Helicopters thrummed overhead. Bruce Springsteen’s “Born to Run” pounded from a tower of speakers.

Runners took selfies. Runners checked Facebook. Runners steeled themselves with banal jokes. (“I’m running the half marathon so I’m only ‘half’ crazy!” Waka, waka.) Mostly, runners talked constantly about running.

I said a quick goodbye to my relay teammates, mentally checked my claustrophobia and security concerns (mass shootings, bombings, etc.), and wandered into the massive crowd at the starting line.

The tall(ish) buildings on Second gave the race a big-city feel. The huge race clock and the great announcer, the music and the sidewalks teeming with a cheerful crowd, set a stage for an impressive race start. I’m not sure if the other 20,000-orso runners felt this way. But I did, and I swelled with pride because my city was looking so damn fine.

The huge crowd counted down — 3, 2, 1! — and I got fired up with my mind set on the biggest reward for anyone who has run the marathon — the quarter-mile stretch through the St. Jude campus.

The race turned east onto Court, and once my eyes adjusted to the rising sun, I saw something amazing. Down the street’s gentle downward slope ran a dense parade of brightly clad bodies from Court Square

to Danny Thomas.

My legs hurt. My breathing was off.

My gloves were too hot. My music wasn’t right. People pushed by me. It sucked. This was close to the Happy Mexican, not even to the second mile. I was in trouble.

I was unhappily juggling all of this around the corner of Georgia and Carolina when I got a shock. An older woman was cheering on the runners when her body suddenly went completely rigid, and she fell stiffly to the ground. I ran toward her and in the split second before I got there, two people were already by her side and another was calling 911.

The situation was well under control, so I rejoined the race. It made me reconsider my health as a gift and be thankful that I could be out on a racecourse at all. My thoughts turned to St. Jude’s patients, many of whom would love to complain only about sore legs, dumb music, and rude runners.

All of it silenced my inner crybaby. I pressed on with a renewed strength.

I got dozens of high fives and heartfelt encouragement from random strangers. A guy dressed as a Stormtrooper held a sign that read: “May the Course Be with You.” A turn down Shadyac in the Pinch brought the St. Jude gate into focus. I turned my music off and yelled (like a maniac) to everyone around me: “Pay attention! This is the best part!” And it was.

Running through that campus on that day is a Memphis moment that’s incomparable to anything else and indescribable to anyone who hasn’t been there. If you can, do it. Pride and joy will melt your face off.

I handed my belt off to my teammate, grateful I hadn’t let my team down. But more than that, I felt a joy for my city and its amazing institutions. And I was proud that even though I hadn’t felt ready for the race, I did it anyway.

Food Justice League

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S POTLI G HT B y M i c a e l a Wa t t s

A new organization tackles hunger in Memphis.

The ribs in Tilth’s umbrella — Bring It Food Hub, Memphis Center for Food and Faith (MCFF), GrowMemphis, and Urban Farms-Memphis — will have the ability to collaborate for maximum food distribution through community partners, such as church congregations and community centers. It’s like a network of capillaries now being fed by a main artery.

For Noah Campbell, the director of MCFF, food justice comes down to three components: access, choice of food beyond limited availabilities, and food sovereignty, or the ability to choose and grow your own food.

“I think our hope is that with these different programs — which each have very specific functions in the local food system and food access network — we will be able to create programs and relationships with partners that can really attend to all three factors that I think of when I think of food justice,” Campbell said.

Alex and Lori Greene of the Bring It Food Hub will be one of the organizations gathered under the wings of Memphis Tilth. They offer subscriptions to produce, grains, and eggs from local farmers in the greater tristate area.

Alex refers to the community-sponsored agriculture subscriptions as the

the most.

“Our great hope is that as it expands, it will provide us with an opportunity to provide that food for free to foodinsecure families located in food deserts,” Alex said, referring to the census tracts that define densely populated areas without walking access to a traditional grocery store.

Seattle Tilth was able to serve 74,000 residents in 2014 alone. Should Memphis Tilth enjoy the same amount of cohesion and success, those stranded in Memphis’ food deserts may finally find their oasis.

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“Our great hope is that as [Tilth] expands, it will provide us with an opportunity to provide food for free to food-insecure families.”

— Alex Greene

Hub’s “bread and butter,” yet they still find themselves with an abundance of leftover subscriptions.

“Unused bags of the Food Hub subscriptions are redistributed to community contacts,” Lori said. “Or sometimes even the First Congo kitchen or the Urban Bicycle [Food] Ministry. It’s all about finding the avenues for the food to get into the proper hands.”

Through Tilth, Bring It Food Hub and the other food justice organizations involved will be able to use their combined resources to get food into the hands of people who need it

NEWS & OPINION

In 2010, the Food Research and Action Center reported that 26 percent of Memphis residents experience food insecurity. Just four years later, a report released by the U.S. Conference of Mayors showed that some 46 percent of emergency food assistance requests were going unmet.

For the vast numbers of residents experiencing food insecurities, the solutions needed are multipronged, and in most cases, too intricate for the individual efforts of any one local food justice nonprofit group.

Enter Memphis Tilth, a nonprofit organization that offshoots from Seattle Tilth. The goal of Tilth will be to serve as the umbrella covering several nonprofit organizations that have been previously battling one or more of the many components of food insecurity, thereby creating cohesion among each nonprofit’s ability.

9

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• Dedric Lawson has filled a void, and then some. The precocious power forward could be playing his senior season in high school. Instead, he scored 22 points and pulled down 15 rebounds in his second college game, against the 8th-ranked team in the country.

(Those numbers were never achieved by one Austin Nichols.) Last Saturday against Southeast Missouri State, Lawson scored 28 points and grabbed 14 rebounds in 38 minutes on the floor.

His current averages of 15.9 points and 9.0 rebounds haven’t been put up by a Memphis player since Chris Massie averaged 16.7 and 10.8 in 2002-03. There are lots of games left to play, and the competition gets stronger in January, but Dedric Lawson, as Pastner has said, “is a stud.”

• As good as Lawson has been, the case could be made that Ricky Tarrant Jr. has been the Tigers’ early-season MVP. This time last season, no one knew who the Tiger point guard was (or would be). Pookie Powell wanted the job. So did an out-of-shape Kedren Johnson.

Markel Crawford took some turns.

There is no debate this season. Tarrant has met every standard Pastner and the Tiger staff could have envisioned for the Alabama graduate transfer. Tarrant has set the pace for a team that must push the ball offensively to win. He leads the team with 31.3 minutes per game and has dished out 28 assists with only eight turnovers. Tarrant is aggressive to the rim and makes his free throws (87 percent on 56 shots).

• Shaq Goodwin is playing with urgency. Pastner likes to endorse Goodwin’s “high motor.” During his first three college seasons, that motor sputtered regularly. But the senior seems to know this will be the season his impact will make the most difference, on young teammates like the Lawson brothers, on the Tigers’ standing in the AAC, and on any chances this team has of reaching the NCAA tournament. Goodwin’s

11/24/15 4:20 PM

averages (14.1 and 8.6) are significantly up from his career numbers entering the season (9.5 and 6.0). “I need to make sure I enjoy [the season],” said Goodwin after the Louisiana Tech win on December 1st. “If I’m not, it’s a cancer to the team, and it shows.”

• The Tiger bench is thin but capable. Let’s start with the positive: Trahson Burrell can be one of the finest sixth men in the country. His sheer athleticism and active play at either end give the Tigers a boost five or six minutes into a game. In six games (all off the bench), Burrell has averaged 23.3 minutes and scored or rebounded in double figures in five of the six games. Freshman guard Jeremiah Martin has shown signs he is capable of manning the point full-time, perhaps as early as next season. And K.J. Lawson brings the energy you’d expect from someone known by too many as “the other Lawson.” After those three, though, the Tiger rotation is lacking. The biggest man on the team, Nick Marshall, hasn’t earned Pastner’s confidence. Dedric Lawson and Goodwin are going to get into foul trouble.

How will the reserves keep Memphis competitive in such scenarios? We don’t have a complete answer, at least not yet.

There are lots of games left to play, and the competition gets stronger in January, but Dedric Lawson, as Pastner said, “is a stud.”

• There are too many empty seats at FedExForum. Through six home games, the Tigers have announced attendance (ticket sales) above 12,000 only once (the Oklahoma game). This after attendance dropped precipitously last season (13,915 after 16,121 in 2013-14). Have basketball fans simply shifted their time, attention, and money to football? I don’t think it’s that simple. The Tigers need big wins, and they need a star. Dedric Lawson may fill the latter. As for big wins, would beating Ole Miss on December 18th count? What about South Carolina on January 2nd?

The Tigers have six more home games before they travel to UConn on January 9th, then just eight more games at FEF the rest of the season. The vacant sections of the home arena are uncomfortable statements on the condition of the program. When will they be filled again?

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POLITICS By Jackson Baker

Matters of Commission Election Commission administrator Holden to leave; county commissioners play Santa Claus.

The announcement Monday by Rich Holden of his decision to retire as Shelby County Election Commission administrator at the end of the year belongs to the category of events that are both surprising and instantly seen as inevitable, once they

occur.

For years Holden has borne the brunt of virtually nonstop criticism for a seemingly endless series of glitches and issues that have bedeviled the county’s electoral process. These have run the gamut from the issuance of ballots improperly matched up with the appropriate districts to snarls in vote-counting to what critics charged was a disregarding of quirks in the county’s voting machines.

At various times, Holden was the recipient of sanctions from the Election Commission itself, votes of no confidence by the Memphis City Council and the Shelby County Commission, and demands by local elected officials for federal investigations of his office.

Holden’s problems began as far back as the time of his appointment in 2009 by a commission that had become newly majority-Republican in the previous election cycle, when the state House of Representa-

VS

tives tipped over to GOP control.

Since the Senate had already come under a Republican majority, that made the GOP the state’s official majority party, and Tennessee law provides that not only the state Election Commission but each of the 95 county election commissions shall consist of a 3-2 majority in favor of the party which controls the legislature.

For decades, that fact resulted in anomalies like the presence of pretend-Democrats in control of election commissions in several ancestrally Republican East Tennessee counties where there were as many actual Democrats as there were aardvarks.

In Shelby County, however, the two parties had for some time coexisted in a condition of rough equivalence, and the change-over from Democratic to Republican control in the administration of elections had the potential of controversy under the best of circumstances.

And that fact was accentuated in 2009 by a fasttrack post-election effort of the new GOP majority on the county Election Commission to transition Holden, who had been a Republican member of the commission, into the administrator’s job, which had long been held by Democratic CAO James Johnson.

The move was initially staved off by a statement of caution from former state Attorney General Robert Cooper, but would eventually come to pass, with

Holden acceding to the position of administrator and Johnson becoming a Democratic commission member.

The newly configured commission hit a bump with the 2010 county election, the first major partisan election under the new management, when an apparent electronic glitch erroneously recorded thousands of potential election-day voters as already having cast ballots in the early-voting period, with hundreds of them being turned away before the problem was discovered and corrected.

Given that the slate of Republican candidates swept that election over their Democratic opponents, the losing Democrats thought they smelled a fish and sued to have the results overturned. They were supported by a series of itemized charges— some of them alleging chicaneries that seemed fanciful enough for a James Bond saga — from Black Box Voting, an outof-state watchdog organization.

The list of allegations was pruned down to a series of possible technical irregularities before trial, and thenChancellor Arnold Goldin dismissed the plaintiffs’ suit as not meeting the standards for declaring the election result “incurably uncertain,” as required for the trial to be pursued. The numerical gaps between winner and loser had, in any case, seemed far larger than could have been

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affected by the election-day glitch.

But the seeds of suspicion had sprouted, and the almost dependable eruption of new glitches in election after election ever since has done little to restore trust between the two parties vis-à-vis the election process.

The basis of contention shifted in the course of time from suspicion of fraud to simple negligence or mismanagement, and the spotlight shifted away from members of the commission itself to Holden.

Following the mismatching of thousands of races to precincts in ballots issued in the August 2012 county election, the commission members, Democrats and Republicans alike, agreed to put Holden on sixmonth probation.

He emerged with his job intact, but allegations and complaints continued, from Democratic members of the commission and self-appointed watchdogs like Steve Ross and Joe Weinberg. Most recently, Weinberg made a point of publicizing a new case of apparent wrong ballots being issued to specific voters, this one based on a challenge originally raised by John Marek, one of the losing candidates in the recent election for the Memphis City Council’s District 5.

And state Representative G.A. Hardaway had of late gone so far as to call for a criminal investigation of Holden.

There often seemed to be a good

• The Shelby County Commission, another local body accustomed to a fair amount of contentiousness, eased into its annual holiday break with a Monday meeting that lacked any of the clashes between members that have become routine, and, for the time being, avoided as well any resumption of the commission’s ongoing conflict with the administration of county Mayor Mark Luttrell.

And, as a result of the defeat at Wednesday’s committee sessions of a resolution from Commissioner Steve Basar requiring approval by the county commission and city council of any potential merger of the city/county Economic Development and Growth Engine Board (EDGE) with the Community Redevelopment Agency, Basar had withdrawn his resolution from Monday’s agenda.

The main order of business for the Election Commission administrator Holden to leave

commission on Monday was to approve further incremental grants to community organizations, projects, and charities deemed to be deserving by members of the commission acting under their recently adopted license to dispense such lagniappes on a district-by-district basis.

One indication of Monday’s laid-back pre-holiday mood came in the form of a quip from commission chairman Terry Roland to Luttrell’s CAO, Harvey Kennedy, who had previously complained that the microphone at his desk in the well of the commission auditorium was malfunctioning.

“Well, Cap, you see we got your button fixed, and you don’t even need to use it,” cracked Roland, during a lull in proceedings. (The breeziness of addressing Kennedy, a former Navy captain, as “Cap” was an interesting indicator of the commission’s relations with the administration, as well.)

The lack of action Monday on either the EDGE issue or the conflict between the commission and the administration does not mean that either is a closed matter, of course. There will doubtless be further actions on the commission (and on the city council, as well) to revise the terms of the relationship with EDGE so as to give members of the legislative bodies more active say on industrial recruitment matters than their presence on the EDGE board as ex officio members currently allows.

And there are ongoing discussions behind the scenes to break the stalemate over the commission’s wish to complete the installation of former Commissioner Julian Bolton to act as an independent attorney on behalf of the commission. Basically, the commission insists on the basis of the County Charter that it has that right; Luttrell and County Attorney Ross Dyer insist on the basis of the self-same charter that they do not.

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NEWS & OPINION

JACKSON BAKER

POLITICS

deal of overreach by Holden’s critics, and no doubt partisan motives played a role in his tribulations, as did a general need to find a scapegoat for problems and circumstances beyond the province of a single individual. And, though generally goodnatured and uncomplaining, the husky ex-Marine sometimes evinced a stubbornness in the face of complaints that others found frustrating.

In any case, Holden is at last off the hot seat. The five-member Election Commission, so often at odds with itself, will now have to agree on a successor.

13

E D ITO R IAL

A New Cabinet So far, the major appointees of Mayor-elect Jim Strickland seem an acceptable bunch. Like the members of his transition team, they are a mix. Appropriately enough for mayoral bridegroom Strickland, the old nuptial saying

December 10-16, 2015

applies: “Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.”

The “something old” component, previously announced, includes several retainees: interim, now permanent, public works director Robert Knecht; general services director Antonio Adams; information services director Brent Nair; libraries director Keenon McCloy; executive director of workforce investment Kevin Woods; finance director Brian Collins; and Memphis Police director Toney Armstrong.

Among the “something new” appointees: Douglas McGowen as chief operating officer (COO), a new position; Bruce McMullen as city attorney; Alexandria Smith as human resources director; and Ursula Madden as chief communications officer.

Madden, a longtime news anchor for WMC-TV, Action News 5, also qualifies in the “something borrowed” category, inasmuch as she is a lift from the ranks of the media, a rival “estate” to government in Edmund Burke’s category of major societal divisions.

And “something blue” as a category applies handily to Armstrong, the head of city law enforcement whose tenure in office has in the past few weeks endured despite dismissive rhetoric by two mayors. A C Wharton made a premature announcement of Armstrong’s departure in the aftermath of the election that proved to be, in the old Nixonian-era term, “inoperative.” And Strickland’s persistent refusals during his campaign to commit himself to re-employing Armstrong were widely read (and apparently misread) as a

14

vote of no confidence.

Indeed, it would almost seem that Armstrong himself — as resourceful in the politics of survival, it appears, as in his celebrated detective work (chronicled for a nation in TV’s 48 Hours) — has the major say in his professional destiny, including whether he will abide by his erstwhile, Wharton-era decision to retire in 2017 or keep on keeping on. The director is remarkably direct in his statements, keeping a sense of independence and an even keel, as when he spoke of the “logistical nightmare” he faced after cuts in police benefits played havoc with his forces. And who among us even remembers that group of restive police dissidents he identified as “the monsters” when he took over as director in 2001.

Without much fuss or fanfare, they were simply subdued.

And, speaking of independent hands, we confess to being intrigued

by Strickland’s “buck-stops-here” determination to reorganize his administration with himself as the handson center of the wheel vis-à-vis his major appointees. This contrasts with Wharton’s approach, which was more of a sort of chairmanship relationship to a group of autonomous departments.

All in all, we think Strickland has begun cautiously and well. And, without being at all conspicuous in a ticket-balancing sort of way, he appears to be fashioning an administration that is diverse and representative of several points of view — an administration that does not break jarringly with the preceding one but clearly can move in its own chosen direction.

C O M M E N TA R Y b y D a n z i g e r

V I E W P O I N T B y Te d R a l l

Bern Unit Senator Sanders is a socialist, and so are you.

Democratic socialism is a system that looks a lot like the United States.

These benefits are standard in almost every other technologically advanced nation on earth, as well as many developing countries. Democratic socialism? It’s like that old dishwashing liquid ad: You’re soaking in it.

As far as I know, Sanders hasn’t emphasized the quality of public education in his campaign. But something is, no pun intended, radically wrong when so few Americans understand basic political and economic terms — especially when they apply to the political and economic system under which they themselves live.

By global standards, Sanders’ campaign is calling for weak socialist tea. In most European countries, all colleges are free or charge nominal fees. Socialized medicine, in which your doctor is a government employee and there’s no such thing as a big for-profit hospital corporation, is the international norm. Paid leave? Obviously. And most governments recognize the importance of public infrastructure, and not relying on the private sector to provide every job.

There can only be one reason Americans don’t know this stuff: They’re idiots.

Their schools made them that way as kids. Media propaganda keeps them that way as adults.

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So what makes them socialist?

Government regulations and the social safety net. Government agencies tell power companies, for example, how much they may pollute the air and set the minimum wage. There is, as in all capitalist societies, poverty. But the government mitigates its effects with welfare and unemployment benefits.

Social security for retirees and free or subsidized health care make things easier when times are tough.

The United States is a democratic socialist country, albeit a lame one.

Senator Sanders wants less lameness.

The New York Times summarized Sanders’ speech: “He wanted an America where people could work 40 hours a week and not live in poverty, and that such a society would require new government entitlements like free public colleges, Medicare-for-all health insurance, a $15 minimum wage, $1 trillion in public works projects to create jobs, and mandatory [paid] parental leave.”

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Because American voters are political ignoramuses, Senator Bernie Sanders found it necessary to take the stage at Georgetown University last month to explain what socialism and democratic socialism are. The point being that too many Democratic primary voters plan to cast their ballots for Hillary Clinton, not because they like her or her ideas, but worry that a self-declared socialist (or democratic socialist) won’t be able to beat the Republican nominee in the general election.

I have to wonder whether an electorate that knows nothing about socialism is qualified to vote at all. And remember: These are Democratic primary voters. One shivers in fear at the colossal dumbness on the Republican right, where climate-change denialism is normative, Ronald Reagan was brilliant, and Tea Party marchers carry signs demanding “government get out of my Medicaid.”

Socialism, Marx and Engels explained, is the transitional economic system between laissez-faire capitalism and communism. Communism being an ideal utopian state that will only become possible after the rise of a New Man (and Woman) whose total commitment to communitarian ideals over individualistic concerns allows the state to wither away and people to rule themselves in small collectives.

This true ideal communism, Marxists believe, is centuries away at best.

In contemporary politics, Communist Party rule in nations like the Soviet Union and China led to confusion, especially in the West. Neither the Soviet nor the Chinese Communist Parties ever claimed to have achieved true communism. These communist parties govern self-declared socialist states, not communist ones. It was, after all, the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics.

When Sanders calls himself a socialist, he’s drawing upon a tradition of Western European electoral politics in which socialist principles live alongside free-market capitalist ones. For Sanders and the hundreds of millions of citizens of the nations of Europe and their postcolonial progeny (Canada, Australia, many African countries), democratic socialism is a system that looks a lot like the United States of America.

In the ur-democratic socialist nations of Norway, Denmark, and Sweden, citizens’ elected representatives propose and vote on laws — just like here.

There is no state economy. There are, as in the U.S., small private businesses and giant corporations.

15

COVER STORY BY BIANCA PHILLIPS / PHOTOS BY JUSTIN FOX BURKS

December 10-16, 2015

SAME SAME

16

The Snarkiest Man in Memphis The life and times of Wonkette writer and Memphian Evan Hurst.

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onkette.com editor/writer Evan Hurst has called Sarah Palin “Our Lady of the Mesquite Moose-Scented Denali Farts” and Mike Huckabee a “presidential candidate and sometimes conjugal-visit-sex lover of Kim Davis.” But he makes certain to protect his journalistic integrity by following that moniker with an all-caps “ALLEGEDLY!” Speaking of Davis, the Kentucky county clerk who was briefly jailed for refusing to issue marriage certificates to same-sex couples, Hurst wrote a Wonkette article in September comparing Davis’ jail sentencing, which happened on a Thursday, to Jesus’ sentencing before Pontius Pilate. (For all you heathens, that’s when Jesus was sentenced to die on the cross, and Jesus was sentenced on a Thursday, too).

That piece opens with “And lo it shall come to pass that on Thursday, the third of the month of September, that Kim Davis, clerk of Rowan County, Kentucky, will be taken before the high priest, and all the chief priests … the chief priests and the whole Sanhedrin will seek evidence against Davis so they may put her to death, but they will not find any, because the United States doesn’t put people to death for being a dirty adulteress … Instead they’ll probably just find her in contempt of court for refusing to do her job for Bigot Reasons.” ‘‘It’s probably my favorite thing I’ve written for Wonkette,” says Hurst, who grew up in a religious household in Germantown, became an atheist, and says, “I’m somewhere in the Christian tradition, though I’m not sure where. Let’s just say I’m a hopeful agnostic who likes Jesus.”

Hurst is one of only three full-time staff writers at Wonkette.com, an online political satire magazine best-known for snarky social commentary, intentionally misspelled words for comedic effect, and lots of dick jokes. But they do all that while managing to present actual journalism and reliable reporting.

Wonkette is national publication, so its writers are scattered all over, but Hurst lives in Memphis, and he cooks up his sarcastic columns from the comfort of his Cooper-Young home.

Ben Carson, Chick-fil-A, and Josh Duggar! Oh My! Hurst posts multiple articles on Wonkette daily, averaging about 21 posts per week.

And the topics range from whatever wacky idea Ben Carson is spouting that day (like that time he backed up Donald Trump’s claim of seeing a video of American Muslims partying it up on the Jersey Shore after 9/11 and then later admitted that maybe he was confusing New Jersey with the Middle East) to sex tips from Jim Bob Duggar, the father of accused molester (or as Hurst calls him “nasty-ass scum pervert”) Josh Duggar and 18 other kids made famous from their TLC reality show 19 Kids and Counting.

The latter focused on a post the elder Duggar wrote about preventing sexual

already know how many bags of dicks we think it sucks — has come up with a whole new thing in its desperate attempts to let this gay kid know how much the school hates him.”

Growing Up Gay and Religious Hurst spent his early years in Little Rock, but his family moved to Memphis when he was 12, so he thinks he’s lived here long enough to claim “Memphian” status.

He went to Germantown High School for a while but finished up his studies at Briarcrest Christian School.

“My parents are good, normal Christian people who live in the suburbs,” Hurst says.

“We had gone to a church that I don’t care about naming. You won’t get much better church music in town than there, but their theology is insane. When you combine Calvinism and predestination — the whole idea that God decided before anyone was born who would end up saved and who wouldn’t — you get an attitude that’s very, very rigid.”

Right after high school, Hurst worked in the church music department as an intern, singing and playing piano. A classically trained pianist, Hurst was certain at the time that he was headed for a music career.

He majored in piano performance at the University of Memphis.

“I didn’t finish. I left school like a common gadabout. Part of it was that I started to realize that I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with my life. Existential crisis right there,” Hurst says.

He quit his job with the church shortly before coming out at age 19. His pastor had made some anti-gay remarks in a sermon. And Hurst says he thought, “Am I really sitting here in the Republican Party of Prayer Memphis Country Club Church hearing this?”

He got a job at the Borders bookstore in Germantown. Many of his coworkers were also gay, and he says it was the first place he saw “out, happy, gay people.” He officially came out to a manager there before he came out to his parents. His parents struggled with the realization that their son was gay, but they eventually came around, and he has a good relationship with them now.

Hurst also spent 10 years as a knife peddler with Cutco, the direct-sales knife purveyor that employs mostly college students as independent salespeople. He credits the job with teaching him to be “assertive without being an ass.”

Hurst was still selling knives when he took on a job in 2010 as the social media director (and later as the associate director) for Truth Wins Out (TWO), a national organization aimed at taking down religious ministries that focus on reparative therapy that claims to “cure” people of homosexuality, often dubbed the “ex-gay movement.”

“At that time, I realized I had loud opinions that I wanted to share. I was in the very beginning of the process of learning how to harness that and make it

productive,” Hurst says.

Hurst was ideal for the job, since one of the most well-known ex-gay organizations was the Memphis-based Love in Action (LIA). In its heyday, LIA was headed up

by John Smid, a man who once claimed he’d been cured of homosexuality, and it operated a widely criticized youth “straight camp” known as Refuge.

LIA turned its focus to adults-only treatment and ended its Refuge program in 2007, a couple of years after it made national headlines when gay youth Zach Stark posted a Myspace entry about being forced into the program by his parents.

Smid resigned in 2008. He denounced reparative therapy and came out as gay in 2011. He’s now married to a man.

By the time Hurst took the job at TWO, Smid was already out of the picture, but Hurst’s job as social media director was focused on the national ex-gay movement, which was very much alive and well in 2010.

“As social media director, I was making things up as I went along. I was doing a lot of writing [on TWO’s website] and trying to build an audience,” Hurst says. “There was a lot of improvisation and creativity. But I’m kind of a jack-ofall-trades, at least in areas that I know,” Hurst says.

“We‘re dirty and vulgar, but we also pride ourselves on being ... the most accurate.”

Around the same time in 2010 that Hurst started with TWO, he began freelancing a semi-regular column on Wonkette called “The Homosexuals,” a tongue-in-cheek report on “what the homosexuals are doing to society.” But as his responsibilities grew at TWO, his freelancing fell by the wayside.

In recent years, though, more and more former ex-gay leaders have denounced reparative therapy. Leaders like Smid and former Exodus International chairman John Paulk have made formal apologies to the gay community for the harm the ex-gay movement caused. Hurst saw the need for TWO diminish as the movement changed, and in February, he contacted Wonkette publisher Rebecca Schoenkopf about getting back into freelancing for the site. Within a few months, Schoenkopf had moved Hurst into a full-time role. In addition to writing for the site, Hurst also serves as its social media director, meaning he’s responsible for Wonkette’s tweets.

“Evan is disgusting, and he’s my favorite person in the world,” Schoenkopf says.

Wonkette Value Added Hurst and other Wonkette writers pride themselves on being more than just a news aggregator site. When a piece goes up on Wonkette, it typically contains new information or an angle not covered by the national media.

“If we write about something on Wonkette, there has to be what we call the ‘Wonkette value added.’ You might not hear about something from us the second it happens, but for our readers, they’ll see a big story happen, and their reaction is ‘I can’t wait for Wonkette’s take on this,’” Hurst says.

Take, for example, Hurst’s piece on Troy Goode, the Memphis man who died in police custody after being hog-tied. Goode had taken LSD before a Widespread Panic concert in Southaven, and when he began acting erratically, his wife attempted to drive him home. She pulled over in a parking lot on the way home. Police were called, and they attempted to restrain Goode by hog-tying him. He died in Southaven police custody at the hospital.

The Mississippi state autopsy report is claiming Goode overdosed on LSD, which, as Hurst reports in his story, is highly unlikely. Rather than simply rehashing what other Memphis media had reported, Hurst did some original reporting, comparing how much LSD was in Goode’s system (1.0 nanogram) to a 2008 Harvard Medical School study that looked at eight test subjects who had between 10 and 70 micrograms per milliliter of LSD in their bloodstreams. There are 1,000 nanograms in a microgram. Hurst mentions in his article that while some of those test subjects experienced comas and respiratory problems, none died.

“If we are doing our back-of-the-napkin math correctly, Troy had approximately A FUCKTON less acid in his system than the research subjects we just mentioned, who, again, did not die,” Hurst wrote.

Hurst prides himself on accuracy.

Lately, he likes to point out that none of Wonkette’s San Bernadino coverage has been retracted.

“We’re dirty and vulgar, but we also pride ourselves on being one of the most accurate websites that we know of,” Hurst says. “When you read about a bill or a Supreme Court decision or a court filing on Wonkette, you can be sure that the author read the thing first. We have the source material.”

Wonkette.com was founded in 2004

by Gawker Media. Its founding editor Ana Marie Cox has gone on to work as the Washington correspondent for GQ and as the lead blogger on U.S. politics for The Guardian. The site went through a few editors and another owner before Schoenkopf purchased it in 2012.

Schoenkopf has a background in altweekly journalism, having previously worked for OC Weekly, the Santa Barbara Independent, and LA CityBeat.

“In the early days, there were like continued on page 18

COVER STORY m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

deviance by removing books, magazines, and other media “that have worldly or sexual content.”

“Well, praise Jesus, because Jim Bob Duggar knows how to keep your wangdoodle sparkly clean for Jesus and your broodmare wife,” Hurst wrote.

From the patio at Bar DKDC, one of his favorite haunts, the 35-year-old Hurst discusses his style over Wiseacre beers.

He’s a self-professed introvert, but you’d never know from talking to him. He’s constantly cracking jokes, and he cusses like a sailor.

“I write about anything and everything,” says Hurst, who showed up to the interview in a Wonkette T-shirt.

“You always end up getting your pet things when you’re a writer — some more serious, some less serious. The first two stories I posted on Wonkette this morning were one on Kim Davis (I read the 126page appeal they filed in the Sixth Circuit) and one on which one of the Duggars is going to have sex next. Those are two pet things of mine.”

His style is snarky and filled with witty one-liners, even when he’s writing about far more somber topics, like last week’s mass shooting in San Bernadino.

His piece the day after the shootings was a harsh critique (a style he calls “journalism ’splaining”) of the mainstream media’s tendency to sensationalize and jump to conclusions before the facts are known. Although more is known now on the shooters’ possible links to radical Islam, not much was known on the day after the shooting, yet mainstream networks were all over the terrorism angle.

From that story: “There are theories flying around: that it was an act of workplace violence after Farook’s stapler was stolen one too many times, or maybe he was a hardened jihadist doing ISIS in Southern California. (Fox News is already committed to the DUH, OBVIOUS conclusion that of course it is radical Islamic terrorism, just like in Paris, because Farook had a Muslimy name and his co-shooter’s name is just plain ‘weird.’) We don’t know yet, and neither does Fox News, and neither does your right-wing uncle.”

Most of the time, though, Hurst’s commentary focuses on less tragic stories of national interest. As a gay man, he tends toward stories that affect the LGBT community. Last month he wrote about the “wing-nut gay-hatin’ fans of Chickfil-A” being up in arms about a Nashville Chick-fil-A franchise’s sponsorship of an LGBT film festival.

Since he’s located in Memphis, Hurst has the upper hand when a Memphis story goes viral. In September, he picked up on a story originally broken by the Flyer about Christian Brothers High School senior Lance Sanderson, who wasn’t allowed to bring his male date to prom.

Wrote Hurst: “The all-male Christian Brothers High School in Memphis — which SCIENCE FACT, was yr Wonkette’s rival high school back in the day, so you

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continued from page 17 a million posts a day, and they were a paragraph long with a link to something.

Now it’s longer form, and each article should have an entire argument within it, instead of just like, ‘here’s a thing,’” Schoenkopf says. “I think it’s really well-done by smart people with a lot of institutional knowledge.”

The Wonkette style is unique in that each writer puts a personal spin on stories through any combination of made-up words, cursing, or run-on sentences.

“Some people see the style, and it personally offends them. For other people, it might take a minute, but then they’re like, ‘Oh, I get it. [The writers] really are smart people,’” Schoenkopf says.

Hurst is a fan of cursing, dick jokes, and funny asides written in parentheses and in all-caps. For comedic effect, he also likes to use phrases and slurs that he knows may offend some, but that’s his way to address what he sees as a tendency among liberals to be overly politically correct.

“There’s a reason I use phrases like ‘the gays and the BLTs’ for the LGBTwhatever-it-is community. We call all kinds of people on our own side funny things,” Hurst says. “But it’s like, get over yourself. There’s this sort of humorlessness that has taken over on a lot of the left that says we can’t even laugh at ourselves anymore.”

He crafts his vulgar prose from his home computer, likely with his 11-yearold dog Lulu at his feet. He lives alone, since he’s “hopelessly single,” which suits him just fine, since he says writing for Wonkette is a 65- to 70-hour-a-week job.

“It’s always a struggle. I work on weekends too. It takes a lot just to make that happen, week after week. And then you have days where we have a presidential debate or when the namea-shooting-here happens. Those days are completely different. That’s a whole different schedule,” Hurst says.

“If there’s a debate, I’m going to work a whole day, starting at 7:30 a.m., and, hopefully before the first debate, I’ll have an hour to do whatever — eat some food, play Scrabble on my computer, or whatever. And then we’re live-blogging, and then you get to the end of it, and it’s 10 p.m. Then you have to figure out what happened in the debate that deserves its own individual story the next day. I wouldn’t be doing it if I didn’t love it. But it’s a very time-consuming job.”

He’s so busy writing for Wonkette that Hurst says he’s completely let his passion for music fall by the wayside. He used to play at Mollie Fontaine, but he hasn’t done that in a while.

“I want to get back into it. It’s one of those things on my to-do list, forcing myself back into writing music and singing,” he says. “It’s a big thing to find the time.”

For now, though, Hurst is making a different kind of music — the kind where he writes lyrical blog posts about gun-

crazed Nevada Assemblywoman Michele Fiore’s Christmas card, which features the lawmaker posing with her entire family — even the 5-year-old grandson — posing with an arsenal of Glocks and assault rifles (The large-breasted Fiore famously released a 2016 calendar filled with pictures of herself in tight clothing, posing with guns).

Wrote Hurst: “For liberals, it is the War on Christmas season, where we get up every single day at early-o-clock to receive our marching orders for how to make the baby Jesus cry in his manger.

REAL AMERICANS, though, are sending Christmas cards, with reindeer and funny faces and nativity scenes and #familyjokes.

And boobs and guns. Mostly boobs and guns.”

RANDOM THOUGHTS

As you might imagine, Hurst has a few strong opinions. Here are some of the Flyer’s favorite quotes from our interview with him.

On Kim Davis: “[She] actually said this is a heaven or hell issue — doing her job as a representative of the government.

You mean to tell me that she literally thinks that her belief system says this loving God she found four years ago who gave her life is going to turn around and throw her in hell because she signed a gay marriage license? That’s stupid. That’s a dumbass belief.”

On Ben Carson: “This guy, the poor thing, we think his brain is broken. I don’t understand how that’s the same person who walked into an operating room and said ‘I’m going to operate on your brain.’

We think something happened, and his brain is broken.”

On the presidential race: “The Republicans ... don’t know what the hell they are doing. They have such high hopes, and I’ll eat my words if something happens, but I don’t see any of those Republicans having a prayer against Hillary Clinton. I wouldn’t say that about Bernie [Sanders], but I’d say that about Hillary. They’ve lost their last scandal with Benghazi.”

On disgraced former Congressman Aaron Schock, who resigned in March after he was caught spending government funds on lavish office décor, new cars, and a personal photographer, among other things: “There are the long-standing rumors about him being gay — you can look at his Instagram and draw your own conclusions. We never explicitly said he was, but we implied it. A lot. Regardless, he was misusing taxpayer funds to do all of these elaborate, ornate things for himself, starting with the office [decorated in the style of TV show Downton Abbey].

And then you find out about his hot, personal photographer Jonathon with an ‘O.’ And you see how Jonathon gallivants around the globe with him. He took him to India on what I imagine was a completely romantic trip. Not that I’m saying he’s gay.”

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steppin’ out

We Recommend: Culture, News + Reviews

By Chris Davis

Like the dirty street urchins who drive the plot, Newsies seemed destined to flame out and disappear. Disney’s sprawling mess of a movie musical flopped at the box office, and critics gave it a nearly unanimous thumbs down.

The notionally true story about orphaned newsboys unionizing and striking when media baron Joseph Pulitzer docks their pay one-tenth of a cent landed in theaters at a time when organized labor was weak, newspapers were slashing budgets, and, in spite of the fact that most people were working longer hours and for less pay, nobody in America seemed to be feeling nostalgic for labor unions. What could have possibly inspired investors to back a Broadway musical and tour built around a film that seemed to have failed so badly on every front?

“It was the fans,” says Joey Barreiro, who plays Jack Kelly, a role originated by a singing and dancing Christian Bale, six years before American Psycho launched the Batman star’s journey to the dark side. “The fans demanded it.

Newsies was the most fan-requested material to be turned into a Broadway musical.”

Disney listened to the show’s fans but proceeded with caution. Reviews of the musical were mixed, but a successful run at New Jersey’s Paper Mill Playhouse opened the door to a limited Broadway run that performed well past its planned expiration date.

“People are attracted to stories that are true and relevant,” Barreiro says. “We’re always going to be rooting for the underdogs. You can guarantee that 100 percent of the time the audience is going to be rooting for for the characters who aren’t rich and exploiting the people below them to win.”

“NEWSIES” AT THE ORPHEUM DECEMBER 8TH-13TH. $25-$125. ORPHEUM-MEMPHIS.COM

December 10-16, 2015

Cafe Le Roux, DeJaVu, and the Choo Food News, p. 37

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Prison Christmas memories The Last Word, p. 47

THURSDAY December 10

FRIDAY December 11

Thursday Night Live!

Beth Sholom Synagogue, 6:30-9:30 p.m., $60 Celebrating the Beth Sholom’s 60th anniversary, featuring Last Comic Standing contestant Gary Gulman and Amy Shanker, a regular at Chicago’s Laugh Factory.

Bianca Del Rio’s Rolodex of Hate Minglewood Hall, 8 p.m., $35 Comedy show by Bianca Del Rio, winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race and described as “Joan Rivers in Drag.”

All’s Well That Ends Well Dixon Gallery & Gardens, 7 p.m., $16 The Tennessee Shakespeare Company present this tale of a quest for love.

Glitchmas Glitch, 6-10 p.m.

A one-night-only art market featuring jazz by Alex Gatez.

Snowy Nights in My Big Backyard Memphis Botanic Garden, 5:30-8:30 p.m., $10 Annual holiday event with fake snow, hot chocolate, winter crafts, games, and a musical light show.

Through December 30th.

Star Wars Skate Mid-South Ice House, 7-9 p.m.

Skaters dress in their best Star Wars threads (and plastic?). There will be a DJ and Star Wars trivia as well.

“Extra Celestial” Crosstown Arts, 6-9 p.m.

Opening reception for this exhibition featuring works on paper and video by artists from Oakland, California’s Creative Growth Art Center, serving adults with mental, developmental, and physical disabilities.

Creative Growth director and exhibition curator Tom Di Maria will give a talk on Saturday, 2 p.m.

SHANE GUTIERREZ

Underdogs

Morgan Keene and Joey Barreiro

“Cast of Blues” at the Blues Foundation Friday

Blue Faces

9PM –1AM

By Chris Davis If you’ve visited the Blues Foundation’s Hall of Fame, you may be at least a little bit familiar with the work of Como, Mississippi, artist Sharon McConnell-Dickerson. There is a bust in the permanent exhibit for 1981 inductee Bobby “Blue” Bland that’s more than just a rack supporting the “Stormy Monday” artist’s signature captain’s hat. The detailed life cast of Bland’s face depicts every fleshy fold and worry line. It was taken by Dickerson in 2002 during a session at the Malaco recording studio in Jackson, Mississippi.

McConnell-Dickerson’s “Cast of Blues” exhibit is 15 years in the making. It collects 40 white composite resin life-cast masks of blues musicians in the exhibit, and one bronze cast of Johnny Winter’s hands. Blues legends collected for this series include Ruth Brown, James Cotton, Bo Diddley, David “Honeyboy” Edwards, John Hammond, Robert Lockwood Jr., Taj Mahal, “Little Milton” Campbell, Charlie Musselwhite, Pinetop Perkins, Bobby Rush, Hubert Sumlin, Koko Taylor, and Johnny Winter.

McConnell-Dickerson is a blind artist, and visitors to the exhibit are encouraged not only to look at the masks but to explore them through touch, and the masks will be installed at a height accessible to children and people in wheelchairs.

There’s no admission charge to visit the Legendary Rhythm and Blues Cruise Gallery, which is located in the Blues Foundation lobby, upstairs from the paid Hall of Fame exhibit.

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SUNDAY December 13

MONDAY December 14

Melinda Doolittle Halloran Centre, 7 p.m., $27.50 The Halloran Centre Music Series continues with this Christmas concert by Melinda Doolittle of American Idol fame.

Memphis Grilled Cheese Festival Hi-Tone, 1-7 p.m., $5 Teams compete in this grilled cheese contest, vying for the top prize in the following categories: Most Ridiculous, Most Cheesiest, Best Tomato Soup, and Best All Around. Festival-goers can try samples of each team’s goods and vote for Fan Favorite. Benefiting Alive Rescue Memphis.

Just City: Wonder Amurica, 6 p.m.

Just City presents this evening of storytelling “exploring the wonder of brokenness.” There will be live music, food trucks, and holiday treats as well.

The Twelve Tastes of Christmas The Gallery at Madison Square, 7-11 p.m., $35 A winter martini tasting, including the Green Grinch and Creme Brulee. Also, desserts! Presented by the Stemmed Glass.

“Taiwan International Metal Crafts Competition” Metal Museum, 2-4 p.m.

Opening reception for this exhibition of the winning works of the Taiwan International Metal Crafts Competition, featuring jewelry and other objects.

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Spike Lee is given free rein in Chi-Raq. Film Review, p. 41

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M U S I C F E AT U R E B y C h r i s S h a w

Ride the White Horse Dirty Streets return with a new album of heavy rock-and-roll.

F

or the past eight years, Dirty Streets have been carving out a niche as one of the most reliable rock bands in Memphis.

Once again working with Alive Naturalsound records and Matt Qualls (the Memphis engineer who worked at Ardent in addition to running Brass Tacks Audio), Dirty Streets have honed their James Gang-meetBlue Cheer sound into their most cohesive album yet with White Horse, and rock critics from all around the country are taking notice. Singer and guitarist Justin Toland sat down with me the week before the White Horse record release show at the Hi-Tone to tell me more about working with Alive records, his thoughts on being a Memphis band, and what exactly the White Horse means to him.

December 10-16, 2015

The Memphis Flyer: How long have you guys been working with Alive records now? So many bands approach working with indie labels on a record-to-record basis. What’s made you want to stick with them?

Justin Toland: This is our second album for Alive.

The first two were released independently. Alive normally does record-to-record deals, which is honestly why we like working with them. You can basically negotiate your contract every time a new album comes out, and Patrick [Boissel], the guy that runs the label, is super laid-back about stuff. We had some friends in other bands that recommended working with Alive, and that meant a lot to us. If we wanted to leave the label, we could. He lets the bands have control over everything, which is another reason why we like working with them.

24

Let’s talk about the album name White Horse. I’m pretty sure you guys aren’t riffing on the Taylor Swift song of the same name. What’s the inspiration there?

The idea of the white horse is this mythical thing that you’re trying to find. It represents a creative inspiration that you feel when you’re writing music. I started researching the white horse, and it shows up in so many different traditions, from Native American traditions to Greek mythology. It just seemed fitting. We went over a bunch of titles, and everyone liked White Horse the most.

Dirty Streets

afraid to jump in and suggest that we move parts around. There will be times when I hit a brick wall with writing or I’ll show him a demo that I don’t even really like, and he will come up with parts that make me like it. That’s a new thing that never used to happen.

Matt Qualls has been your main man in the studio for a long time now, but he recently moved to Northern California. Does this mean you’ll be looking for a new producer moving forward?

He helped work on the last record, and we did a single with him a year ago, and both of those just sounded so good that we got him to do everything for White Horse. I mean, we are really trying to work with him on the next record.

What’s the feedback for White Horse been like?

So far it’s been great. It’s also been the fastest response that we’ve ever had. The reviews have all been positive, and there’s been some good press. I definitely feel like this is our best album, mostly because we worked so hard on it. Every record we’ve done, we’ve gone in and worked harder than before. It’s been two years since we’ve had a record, and before this one we were trying to bang them out every year.

Part of the reason I think this album is so strong is because we went into the writing process trying to make everything come out naturally. There was no fear of criticism or wondering what people might think about it, we were just trying to write an album that we would like and want to listen to.

You guys have been a band for eight years, and other than moving from a four-piece to a three-piece at the very beginning, there haven’t been any lineup changes.

Being so comfortable with each other must make the writing process easier.

Definitely. Our bass player, Thomas [Storz], is really good at arranging stuff, but I think in the beginning he was less inclined to jump in and tweak a song. I’d write a song, and he’d be like, “that’s cool.” But now, he’s not

I guess that means Alive records will just have to fly you to California.

I think we might. We are definitely going to cut a single out there the next time when we are on tour. Even if all we do is stop in for a few hours and lay something down, it’s something we all want to happen.

You guys don’t play Memphis that often. Is that a conscious decision? You and I have talked before about the difference between being a locally loved Memphis band and being a Memphis band that’s trying to tour.

We got to a point where we were playing all the time here, and it was awesome. Things were really good for us in Memphis about four or five years ago, but so many people told me, “don’t worry about playing in Memphis.

Don’t worry about winning awards here, because regardless of how great it is here for you, you don’t want to be the band that’s always there.” Now it’s just a thing where we have more stuff going on out of town. We just have more opportunities happening out of town than we used to. I have to book the shows here on my own, but other people book us out of town. The shows we play here at this point are more about introducing out-of-town bands that I like to a Memphis audience.

Dirty Streets album release show with Jack Oblivian, the Sheiks, and DJ Andrew McCalla, Saturday, Dec. 12th, 9 p.m. at the Hi-Tone. $10.

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The King Beez Thursdays, 5:30 p.m.; B.B. King’s All Stars Thursdays, Fridays, 8 p.m.; Will Tucker Band Fridays, Saturdays, 5 p.m.; Lisa G and Flic’s Pic’s Band Saturdays, Sundays, 12:30 p.m.; Blind Mississippi Morris Sundays, 5 p.m.; Memphis Jones Sundays, Wednesdays 5:30 p.m.; Doc Fangaz and the Remedy Tuesdays, 5:30 p.m.

Blue Note Bar & Grill 341-345 BEALE 577-1089

Queen Ann and the Memphis Blues Masters Fridays, Saturdays, 8 p.m.-midnight.

Blues City Cafe 138 BEALE 526-3637

Itta Bena 145 BEALE 578-3031

Susan Marshall Fridays, Saturdays, 7-10 p.m.

Jerry Lee Lewis’ Cafe & Honky Tonk 310 BEALE 654-5171

Gary Hardy & Memphis 2 ongoing, 5 p.m. and ongoing, 7 p.m.; The Jason James Trio Fridays-Sundays, 7-11 p.m.; Rockin’ Joey Trites and the Memphis Flash Saturdays, 3-7 p.m., and Wednesdays, 7-11 p.m.

Rum Boogie Cafe’s Blues Hall

Center for Southern Folklore Hall

162 BEALE 521-1851

182 BEALE 528-0150

119 S. MAIN AT PEMBROKE SQUARE 525-3655

Mack 2 Band Mondays-Fridays, 2-6 p.m.; Fuzzy Jeffries & the Kings of Memphis Thursdays, 6:30-10:30 p.m.; Nate Dogg and the Fellas Fridays, Saturdays, 6:30-10:30 p.m.; McDaniel Band Saturdays, 2-6 p.m.; Cowboy Neil Sundays, 2-6 p.m., and Mondays, 6:30-10:30 p.m.; Chic Jones Sundays, Tuesdays, 6:30-10:30 p.m.; Sensation Band Wednesdays, 6:30-10:30 p.m.

King’s Palace Cafe Tap Room 168 BEALE 576-2220

Don Valentine Thursdays, Tuesdays, 8 p.m.-midnight; Mississippi Bigfoot Fridays, 9 p.m.-1 a.m.; Chic Jones, Blues Express Fridays, 9 p.m.-1 a.m., and Saturdays, 8 p.m.-midnight; Vince Johnson and the Plantation Allstars Wednesdays, 8 p.m.-midnight.

Rum Boogie Cafe 182 BEALE 528-0150

Vince Johnson and the Boogie Blues Band Thursdays, 8 p.m.-midnight; Pam and Terry Fridays, Saturdays, 5:30-8:30 p.m.; Memphis Blues Society Jam Sundays, 7-11 p.m.

King’s Palace Cafe 162 BEALE 521-1851

David Bowen Thursdays, 5:309:30 p.m., Fridays, Saturdays, 6:30-10:30 p.m., and Sundays, 5:30-9:30 p.m.

Memphis Bluesmasters Thursdays, 8 p.m.-midnight; Plantation Allstars Fridays, Saturdays, 3-7 p.m.; Low Society Sundays, 8 p.m.-midnight; The Dr. “Feel Good” Potts Band Mondays, 8 p.m.midnight; McDaniel Band Tuesdays, Wednesdays, 8 p.m.-midnight.

Silky O’Sullivan’s 183 BEALE 522-9596

Barbara Blue ThursdaysFridays, Wednesdays, 7-9 p.m., Saturdays, 5-9 p.m., and Sundays, 4-9 p.m.; Dueling Pianos Thursdays, Wednesdays, 9 p.m.-1 a.m., Fridays, Saturdays, 9 p.m.-3 a.m., and Sundays, Tuesdays, 8 p.m.-midnight.

Purple Haze Nightclub

The Bell Singers Sunday, Dec. 13, 4-6 p.m.

Double J Smokehouse & Saloon 124 E. G.E. PATTERSON 347-2648

Live Music Thursdays-Saturdays, 10 p.m.

Brass Door Irish Pub 152 MADISON 572-1813

Live Music Fridays.

Brinson’s 341 MADISON 524-0104

Melting Pot: Artist Showcase Thursdays, 7-11 p.m.

Riverfront Bar & Grill 251 RIVERSIDE

Local Music Fridays, 6-8 p.m.

303 S. MAIN 523-0020

Salsa Night Saturdays, 8:30 p.m.-3 a.m.

Earnestine & Hazel’s

The Silly Goose

531 S. MAIN 523-9754

100 PEABODY PLACE 435-6915

Amber Dunn Hosts: Open Mic Night! Wednesdays, 8-11 p.m.

DJ Cody Fridays, Saturdays, 10 p.m.

The Halloran Centre 225 S. MAIN 529-4299

Melinda Doolittle Saturday, Dec. 12, 7-9:15 p.m.

Bhan Thai 1324 PEABODY 272-1538

77 S. SECOND 527-2700

119 S. MAIN, PEMBROKE SQUARE 417-8435

DJ Dance Music ongoing, 10 p.m.

Rumba Room

Live Music Thursdays, 7-11 p.m., Fridays-Saturdays 9 p.m.-1 a.m.

Huey’s Downtown Blind Bear Speakeasy

140 LT. GEORGE W. LEE 577-1139

Jimbo Mathus and Them Durty Crooks Sunday, Dec. 13, 8:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m.

Two Peace Saturdays, 7-10:30 p.m.

Blue Monkey 2012 MADISON 272-BLUE

Paulette’s RIVER INN, 50 HARBOR TOWN SQUARE 260-3300

Live Pianist Thursdays, 5:308:30 p.m., Fridays and Saturdays, 5:30-9 p.m., Sundays, 11 a.m.-2 p.m., and MondaysWednesdays, 5:30-8 p.m.

The Plexx 380 E.H. CRUMP 744-2225

Old School Blues and Jazz Fridays, Saturdays, 9 p.m.

Karaoke Thursdays, 9 p.m.midnight.

Boscos 2120 MADISON 432-2222

Sunday Brunch with Joyce Cobb Sundays, 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m.

The Buccaneer 1368 MONROE 278-0909

Devil Train Mondays, 8 p.m.; Dave Cousar Tuesdays, 11 p.m.

December 10-16, 2015

Brad Birkedahl Band Thursdays, Wednesdays, 8 p.m.; The Memphis 3 Sundays, 6 p.m., and Mondays, 7 p.m.; FreeWorld Sundays, 9:30 p.m.; Earl “The Pearl” Banks Tuesdays, 7 p.m.

Jeffrey Jordan Sunday, Dec. 13, 7-9 p.m.

King’s Palace Cafe’s Patio

26

2 SHOWS: SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 20 THE ORPHEUM THEATRE

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Hi-Tone

Murphy’s

El Toro Loco

412-414 N. CLEVELAND 278-TONE

1589 MADISON 726-4193

2809 KIRBY PKWY. 759-0593

Otherlands Coffee Bar

Folk’s Folly Prime Steak House

JOSH MILLER

1927 MADISON 726-4372

The Chaulkies Sunday, Dec. 13, 4-7 p.m.; Laura Rain and the Caesars Sunday, Dec. 13, 8:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m.

GOLDEN PELICANS AT THE LAMPLIGHTER The cozy, quiet dive bar known as the Lamplighter will turn into a rowdy rock-and-roll venue when Orlando’s Golden Pelicans stop through Memphis this Friday. The Lamplighter has served as a live music venue sporadically for the past five or six years, hosting local bands like NOTS, The Oscars, and Kruxe, in addition to ex-Memphian Cole Weintraub’s many musical projects like the now infamous weekly “jazz night.” While the bar has long been a haven for Midtown outsiders, it’s service as a live music venue has always been a “love it or hate it” type of situation.

Those not into the idea of loud music tainting the house that Miss Shirley built definitely aren’t going to experience a change of heart when the Golden Pelicans — a band that’s known for their loud and unpredictable, beer-splattering live show — perform.

Since forming in 2011, Golden Pelicans have put Florida garage rock back on the map, releasing handfuls of singles and two (now sold out) LPs. They’ve toured most of the U.S. and recently got back from a successful outing in Europe. While the band’s median age is probably in the upper 30s, their youthful energy and willingness to hit the road has made them one of the premier garage-rock bands in the country. Drummer Rich Evans also serves as the figurehead of Total Punk records, a label that’s worked with the Memphis band Manateees and a bunch of other Southern punk bands. Musically, Golden Pelicans sit somewhere in between High Voltage-era AC/DC and Eddie & the Hot Rods, blasting through their songs with enough ferocious energy to power a small town. Total Punk alumni Manateees and Black Panties open the show. Donations are encouraged. — Chris Shaw Golden Pelicans, Manateees, and Black Panties, Friday, December 11th at the Lamplighter, 9 p.m.

Lafayette’s Music Room 2119 MADISON 207-5097

Scott & Vanessa Sudbury Thursday, Dec. 10, 6 p.m.; James and the Ultrasounds Thursday, Dec. 10, 9 p.m.; 88 Bones Friday, Dec. 11, 10 p.m.; River Bluff Clan Saturday, Dec. 12, 11 a.m.; Naughty Professor Saturday, Dec. 12, 10 p.m.; Joe Restivo 4 Sundays, 11 a.m.; Jeffrey and the Pacemakers Sunday, Dec. 13, 4 p.m.; The Motel Mirrors Sunday, Dec. 13, 8 p.m.; John Paul Keith and Friends Monday, Dec. 14, 6 p.m.; Junior Brown Tuesday, Dec. 15, 8 p.m.; Breeze Cayolle and New Orleans Wednesdays, 5:30 p.m.; Ashley McBryde Wednesday, Dec. 16, 8 p.m.

Lamplighter Lounge 1702 MADISON 726-9916

Memphis Made Brewing Company 768 S. COOPER 207-5343

Tony Manard Saturday, Dec. 12, 5-8 p.m.

Celtic Crossing

The Cove

Dru’s Place

Midtown Crossing Grille

2559 BROAD 730-0719

1474 MADISON 275-8082

394 N. WATKINS 443-0502

Jazz with Ed Finney and Friends Thursdays, 9 p.m.; Faith Evans Ruck Friday, Dec. 11, 10 p.m.; Smokin’ J’s Saturday, Dec. 12, 10 p.m.; Justin White Mondays, 7 p.m.; Richard James Tuesdays, 7 p.m.; Anne Schorr Wednesdays, 7 p.m.; Karaoke Wednesdays, 10 p.m.

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Karaoke Fridays-Sundays.

MARVEL UNIVERSE LIVE! JANUARY 1–3

MARVEL SUPER HEROES including Spider-Man and The Avengers come to life in an action-packed extravaganza. TICKETS ON SALE NOW!

Drew Erwin Friday, Dec. 11, 8-11 p.m.: Memphis Musicians Benefit for the Monic Children’s Center featuring Juju Bushman Saturday, Dec. 12, 7:30 p.m.

P&H Cafe 1532 MADISON 726-0906

Rock Starkaraoke Fridays; Jack the Giant Killer, Black Orchestra Saturday, Dec. 12; Open Mic Music with Tiffany Harmon Mondays, 9 p.m.-midnight; Zeke Johnson Wednesday, Dec. 16.

The Phoenix 1015 S. COOPER 338-5223

Bluezday Thurzday Thursdays, 8-11:45 p.m.; Cowboy Bob’s Roundup Mondays, 8-11:45 p.m.

Sports Junction 1911 POPLAR 244-7904

Live DJ Fridays.; Live music Saturdays.; Karaoke Wednesdays.

Strano Sicilian Kitchen 948 S. COOPER 552-7122

Davy Ray Bennett Sundays, Wednesdays, 6-9 p.m.

Wild Bill’s 1580 VOLLINTINE 207-3975

The Soul Connection Fridays, Saturdays, 11 p.m.-3 a.m.

Golden Pelicans, Manateees, Black Panties Friday, Dec. 11, 10 p.m.-3 a.m.

903 S. COOPER 274-5151

DJ Tree Fridays, 10 p.m.; DJ Taz Saturdays, 10 p.m.; Jeremy Stanfill and Joshua Cosby Sundays, 6-9 p.m.; Candy Company Mondays.

641 S. COOPER 278-4994

Memphis Ukelele Meetup Tuesdays, 6-7:30 p.m.

Minglewood Hall 1555 MADISON 866-609-1744

The Sword “High Country Tour” Tuesday, Dec. 15, 9 p.m.-midnight.

MONSTER JAM FEBRUARY 12–13

University of Memphis Ubee’s 521 S. HIGHLAND 323-0900

Karaoke Wednesdays, 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

East Memphis Dan McGuinness Pub 4694 SPOTTSWOOD 761-3711

Acoustic with Charvey Tuesdays, 8:30 p.m.; Karaoke Wednesdays, 8 p.m.

The world’s premier Monster Jam truck series is returning to FedExForum for two shows.

TICKETS ON SALE NOW!

Karaoke and Dance Music with DJ Funn Mondays, 7-10 p.m.

551 S. MENDENHALL 762-8200

Intimate Piano Lounge featuring Charlotte Hurt Mondays-Thursdays, 5-9:30 p.m.; Larry Cunningham Fridays, Saturdays, 6-10 p.m.

Huey’s Poplar 4872 POPLAR 682-7729

The Scott Holt Band Sunday, Dec. 13, 8:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m.

Mortimer’s 590 N. PERKINS 761-9321

Van Duren Thursdays, 6:308:30 p.m.

Racquet Club of Memphis 5111 SANDERLIN 765-4400

Dantones Saturday, Dec. 12, 8 p.m.-midnight.

T.J. Mulligan’s 1817 KIRBY 755-2481

Karaoke Tuesdays, 8 p.m.

The Windjammer Restaurant 786 E. BROOKHAVEN CIRCLE 683-9044

Karaoke ongoing.

Poplar/I-240 East Tapas and Drinks 6069 PARK 767-6002

Carlos & Adam from the Late Greats Thursdays, 7-9 p.m.; Elizabeth Wise Tuesdays, 7-9 p.m.

Neil’s Music Room 5727 QUINCE 682-2300

The Thrill at Neil’s featuring Jack Rowell and Triplethret Thursday, Dec. 10, 8 p.m.-midnight; Eddie Smith Fridays, 8 p.m.; Backstage Pass Saturday, Dec. 12, 8 p.m.; The Crop Dusters Sunday, Dec. 13, 6-10 p.m.; Gene Nunez and Debbie Jamison Tuesdays, 6 p.m.; Elmo and the Shades Wednesdays, 8 p.m.-midnight.

continued on page 29

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Huey’s Midtown

The Queers, the Glory Holes Friday, Dec. 11.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Final Drive Thursday, Dec. 10, 9 p.m.; Dirty Streets Album Release Show with Jack Oblivian Saturday, Dec. 12, 9 p.m.; Memphis Grilled Cheese Festival featuring Banditos and Dead Soldiers Sunday, Dec. 13, noon; Bleak, Inrage, Thief ’s Hand Monday, Dec. 14, 9 p.m.; Open Mic Comedy Night Tuesdays, 9 p.m.

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28

6-8

Closing Reception for Joey Miller and Panel Discussion to follow featuring Tami Sawyer, Elle Perry, Noel Hutchinson, Joey Miller, and moderator Zandria Robinson

After Dark: Live Music Schedule December 10 - 16 continued from page 27 Owen Brennan’s THE REGALIA, 6150 POPLAR 761-0990

Lannie McMillan Jazz Trio Sundays, 10 a.m.-2 p.m.

Summer/Berclair

Old Whitten Tavern 2800 WHITTEN 379-1965

Live Music Fridays, 9 p.m.-1 a.m.; Karaoke with Ricky Mack Mondays, 10 p.m.-1 a.m.; Open Mic with Susie and Bob Salley Wednesdays, 8 p.m.

Cordova

Germantown

Bahama Breeze

Huey’s Southwind

2830 N. GERMANTOWN PKWY. 385-8744

7825 WINCHESTER 624-8911

Fox and Hound Sports Tavern

Huey’s Germantown

Karaoke Mondays, 8-11 p.m.

819 EXOCET 624-9060

Barbie’s Barlight Lounge

Karaoke Tuesdays, 9 p.m.

661 N. MENDENHALL

Possum Daddy’s Karaoke Saturdays, 9 p.m.-2 a.m.

Maria’s Restaurant 6439 SUMMER 356-2324

Karaoke Fridays, 5-8 p.m.

The Other Place Bar & Grill

The Sensations Sunday, Dec. 13, 8:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m.

7677 FARMINGTON 318-3034

Gary Escoe’s Atomic Dance Machine Sunday, Dec. 13, 8-11:30 p.m.

North Mississippi/ Tunica

Horseshoe Casino Tunica

The Crossing Bar & Grill

In Legends Stage Bar: Live Entertainment Nightly ongoing.

7281 HACKS CROSS, OLIVE BRANCH, MS 662-893-6242

Karaoke with Buddha Tuesdays, Thursdays, 8 p.m.midnight.

1021 CASINO CENTER, TUNICA, MS 800-357-5600

Huey’s Southaven 7090 MALCO, SOUTHAVEN, MS 662-349-7097

JoJo Jeffries and Ronnie Caldwell Sunday, Dec. 13, 8 p.m.-midnight.

J.R.’s Bar & Grill 4788 BETHEL 662-890-5612

2015 Hyundai Sonata

Full Effect Band Friday, Dec. 11, 8 p.m.-midnight.

Mesquite Chop House 5960 GETWELL, SOUTHAVEN, MS 662-890-2467

4148 WALES 373-0155

Pam and Terry Thursdays, 7-10 p.m.

Karaoke Saturdays, 9 p.m.-1 a.m., and Wednesdays, 8 p.m.midnight.

Tunica Roadhouse 1107 CASINO CENTER, TUNICA, MS 662-363-4900

Live Music Fridays, Saturdays.

Whitehaven/ Airport

Wadford’s Grill & Bar 474 CHURCH, SOUTHAVEN, MS 662-510-5861

1870 COVINGTON PIKE • 901.388.8989

Karaoke with DJ Stylez Thursdays, Sundays, 10 p.m.

159

Mugs Pub 4396 RALEIGH-LAGRANGE 372-3556

per mo

Arlington/Eads/ Oakland Rizzi’s/Paradiso Pub 6230 GREENLEE 592-0344

Live Music Thursdays, Wednesdays, 7-10 p.m.; Karaoke and Dance Music with DJ Funn Fridays, 9 p.m.

Bartlett Bartlett Municipal Center 5868 STAGE

Grif ’s Gifts Live - Welcome to the Stage Mondays-Sundays, 6-7:30 p.m.

Hadley’s Pub 2779 WHITTEN 266-5006

Charlie Belt & Friends Thursday, Dec. 10, 8 p.m.midnight; Grand Theft Audio Friday, Dec. 11, 9 p.m.-1 a.m.; Swingin’ Leroy Saturday, Dec. 12, 9 p.m.-1 a.m.; The Original Sunday Funday with the Lineup Sunday, Dec. 13, 5:309:30 p.m.; No Hit Wonders Wednesday, Dec. 16, 8 p.m.midnight.

$

Karaoke Fridays, 9 p.m.-1 a.m.

Stage Stop 2951 CELA 382-1576

Open Mic Blues Jam with Brad Webb Thursdays, 7-11 p.m.

West Memphis/ Eastern Arkansas

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RockHouse Live

Huey’s Cordova

Ice Bar & Grill

Dan McGuinness

5709 RALEIGH-LAGRANGE 386-7222

1771 N. GERMANTOWN PKWY. 754-3885

4202 HACKS CROSS 757-1423

3964 GOODMAN, SOUTHAVEN, MS 662-890-7611

Live Bands Fridays, Saturdays, 8 p.m.; Open Mic Mondays Mondays, 8 p.m.-midnight; Live Music Tuesdays, Wednesdays, 8 p.m.-midnight.

Six String Lovers Sunday, Dec. 13, 8:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m.

T.J. Mulligan’s Cordova 8071 TRINITY 756-4480

Unwind Wednesdays Wednesdays, 6 p.m.-midnight.

Acoustic Music Tuesdays.

Mesquite Chop House

Fitz Casino & Hotel

3165 FOREST HILL-IRENE 249-5661

711 LUCKY LN., TUNICA, MS 800-766-5825

The Lineup Tuesdays, 8 p.m.midnight.

Pam and Terry Wednesdays, 7-10 p.m.

Live Entertainment Wednesdays-Sundays, 6 p.m.

7729 BENJESTOWN 876-5770

Frayser/Millington

Russo’s New York Pizzeria & Wine Bar

Fox and Hound Sports Tavern

Collierville

9087 POPLAR 755-0092

6560 HWY. 51 N. 872-0567

6565 TOWNE CENTER, SOUTHAVEN, MS 662-536-2200

Shelby Forest General Store Tony Butler Fridays, 6-8 p.m.

Huey’s Collierville 2130 W. POPLAR 854-4455

Bex Marshall Sunday, Dec. 13, 4-7 p.m.; Ghost Town Blues Band Sunday, Dec. 13, 8-11:30 p.m.

Haystack Bar & Grill Karaoke Nights at The Stack Wednesdays-Fridays, Sundays, 7 p.m.-1 a.m.

Raleigh

Live Music on the patio Thursdays-Saturdays, 7-10 p.m.; Half Step Down Fridays, 7-10 p.m.

DJ Crumbz Thursdays, 8 p.m.; Club Night Fridays, Saturdays, 9 p.m.; Live Band Karaoke Sundays, 7:30 p.m.; Karaoke Tuesdays, 7 p.m.; Boot Scootin’ Wednesdays, 7 p.m.

The New Backdour Bar & Grill 302 S. AVALON 596-7115

Ms. Ruby Wilson and Friends Sundays, 7 p.m.-midnight; Karaoke with Tim Bachus Mondays, 8 p.m.-1 a.m.; DJ Stylez Wednesdays, 8 p.m.1 a.m.

Live Music Thursdays, 5 p.m.; Karaoke Tuesdays.

Hollywood Casino 1150 CASINO STRIP RESORT, TUNICA, MS 662-357-7700

Live Entertainment Fridays, Saturdays, 9 p.m.-1 a.m.

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4381 ELVIS PRESLEY 332-4159

662DJ, Karaoke/Open Mic Saturdays, 7-11 p.m.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Marlowe’s Ribs & Restaurant

29

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PO

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LiteracyMidSouth.org

Love’s Funny

Playhouse revives I Love You, You’re Perfect, Now Change.

T

ime’s a funny thing. It’s hard to believe it’s been 14 years since the first time my socks were charmed completely off by Joe DiPietro and Jimmy Robert’s musical essay on the perils of romance, I Love You, You’re Perfect, Now Change. It really does seem like just yesterday since Kim Justis, Christopher Swan, Carla McDonald, and Guy Olivieri introduced Memphis theatergoers to DiPietro, the playwright and lyricist who would, in turn, introduce Memphis (the musical) to Broadway. Playhouse on the Square’s current mainstage revival is just about as minimalist as musical theater gets, and nearly as captivating as the show’s regional premiere. It may not be perfect, but it’s a welcome adult alternative to the juvenile fare and holiday-themed perennials that occupy stages this time of year.

I’m still not sold on every aspect of the show, though the complaints I have are relatively minor. Like so many contemporary scripts, I Love You tends to substitute subtext for dialogue. In other words, the characters just come right out and say the things that, even in this kind of sketch comedy, audiences should be allowed to discover over time. The best example of this is in the show’s very first musical number, “Cantata for a First Date,” when the characters all begin singing, “But I’ve got baggage, emotional baggage, a planeload of baggage, that causes much saggage.” Well, of course you do, if you didn’t we wouldn’t be interested.

So stop telling us, and get on with the business of the show. Thankfully, that’s more or less what happens.

I Love You, You’re Perfect, Now Change is a fully clothed burlesque show, stripped from the glittery tease and feathery illusions of glamour. Oh sure, in their preface to the script, the authors beg the performers to play the scenes for honesty, not laughs, noting that the comedy will be better that way, but that’s just good advice in any case. The musical is still a contemporary take on baggy-pants vaudeville comedy, and that lineage was warmly evident in Kevin Shaw’s 1994 production at the intimate old Circuit Playhouse. A lush, red velvet curtain and illuminated, hand-made placards announcing the names of the various sketches placed this compendium of modern love in a kitschy vintage frame. The revival, directed by Dave Landis, is more technological, with the names of the sketches spelled out on a digital screen above the stage. Even with a

piano and violin on stage all the time, this small show feels a bit adrift in the bigger, seemingly emptier space. Fortunately, Landis has assembled a cast that’s more than capable of filling the void.

There’s no narrative connecting the musical numbers and comedy sketches in I Love You, You’re Perfect, Now Change.

Each bit is self-contained. “Satisfaction Guaranteed” is a music-free skit satirizing late-night TV commercials for law firms.

These sharks will arbitrate to get you the kink you deserve, and even sue your partner if they fail to satisfy you in bed. It plays out like an early-season Saturday Night Live skit, still funny if a little stale. “A Stud and a Babe” is timeless by comparison. It’s like a tiny little musical inside a musical showing us how even wallflowers can get lucky on occasion. “Tear Jerk” is another joke that still works in spite of its wellworn subject matter. It will appeal to every man who has ever agreed to take his date to a “chick flick.”

The cast of I Love You

The multitalented Jordan Nichols is fully in his element in this musical comedy, as is Kimberly Baker, an ablebodied veteran of shows like Pippin and Urinetown. Lynden Lewis, who turned heads in the title role of Mary Poppins, shows her range and versatility here, but Justin Asher delivers the night’s biggest laughs. In recent years Asher has devoted himself to playwriting and set design, and his onstage appearances have been limited to sight gags (albeit very good sight gags) taking advantage of the actor’s height in shows like Young Frankenstein and The Addams Family. Asher’s a strong vocalist and a top-notch character actor. He’s especially funny here in a skit called “Scared Straight … to the Altar,” where he plays a hardened mass murderer offering some extremely effective relationship advice.

Whatever works, amiright?

Through December 19th at Playhouse on the Square

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HOURS Mon. - Sat. 10:00 am - 10:00 pm | Sun. 11:00 pm - 7:00 pm whatevershopmemphis.com

m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

2027 Madison @ Morrison 901 590 0048

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

PASSPORT TO Oregon

31

CALENDAR of EVENTS:

Send the date, time, place, cost, info, phone number, a brief description, and photos — two weeks in advance — to calendar@memphisflyer.com or P.O. Box 1738, Memphis, TN 38101.

DUE TO SPACE LIMITATIONS, ONGOING WEEKLY EVENTS WILL APPEAR IN THE FLYER’S ONLINE CALENDAR ONLY.

December 10 - 16

Flicker Street Studio

TH EAT E R

“The Instructors,” exhibition of work by Elizabeth Alley, Jim Buchman, Nancy Cheairs, Maysey Craddock, Hamlett Dobbins, Melissa Dunn, Tad Lauritzen Wright, Susan Maakestad, Sunny Montgomery, Ed Rainey, Kerrie Rogers, and Laurel Sucsy. (767-2999).

Through Dec. 11.

Circuit Playhouse

A Tuna Christmas, the colorful residents of Tuna, Texas’ third-smallest town, are competing in the annual Christmas lawn display contest when a mysterious Christmas phantom wreaks havoc. www. playhouseonthesquare.org. $22-$35. Sundays, 2 p.m., and Thursdays-Saturdays, 8 p.m.

Through Dec. 27.

74 FLICKER (767-2999).

Frame Corner Inc.

Opening reception for “Trophies Through the Lens: African Wildlife Safari Images 2015,” exhibition of photography by Jack Kenner and student photographers benefiting conservation efforts to prevent rhinoceros extinction in Africa. www.jackkenner.com. Thurs., Dec. 10, 5-8 p.m.

51 S. COOPER (725-0776).

Landers Center (DeSoto Civic Center) Miracle on 34th Street, www. dftonline.org. $22. Through Dec. 20.

4560 VENTURE, SOUTHAVEN, MS (662-280-9120).

The Dixon Gallery & Gardens

5056 PARK.

All’s Well That Ends Well, www. tnshakespeare.org. Dec. 10-20.

4339 PARK (761-5250).

Germantown Community Theatre

Miracle on 34th Street: A Live Radio Play, classic tale about a department store Santa who claims to be the real Kris Kringle. The belief of one little girl could save Santa. www. gctcomeplay.org. $24. Fridays, Saturdays, 8 p.m., and Sundays, 2:30 p.m. Through Dec. 20.

3037 FOREST HILL-IRENE (754-2680).

Germantown Performing Arts Center Madonna Learning Center: A Christmas Gift, families and community are entertained and enlightened by the pure, heartfelt joy of the students. www.gpacweb.com. $5.

Tues., Dec. 15, 7 p.m.

1801 EXETER (751-7500).

Gold Strike Casino

Celebration on Ice, original theatrical ice production featuring figure skating and live singers. www.goldstrikemississippi.com. $8. Through Dec. 20.

The Orpheum

If Scrooge Was a Brother, businessman Eb Scroo has a surly attitude about the world, displaying no pity on the poor. This Christmas will be like no other. www.hattiloo.org. $13-$26. Thursdays, Fridays, 7:30 p.m., and Saturdays, 2 and 7:30 p.m., and Sundays, 3 p.m.

Through Dec. 20.

Newsies, story of a band of underdogs who become unlikely heroes when they stand up to the most powerful men in New York. www.orpheummemphis.com. $25-$100. Tues.Thurs. Through Dec. 13.

203 S. MAIN (525-3000).

Playhouse 51

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, children’s classic by C. S. Lewis. www.playhouse51. com. $12. Sun., 2 p.m., and Fri., Sat., 7:30 p.m. Through Dec. 13.

37 S. COOPER (502-3486).

The Salvation Army Kroc Center

A Lifetime of Christmas, music, dance, and entertainment.

The Sensory Family Friendly Performance is Dec. 13. All are pay-what-you-can. www.stagedoormemphis.org. Sundays, 7 p.m., and Fridays, Saturdays, 2:30 p.m. Through Dec. 20.

8077 WILKINSVILLE (872-7170).

Playhouse on the Square

800 E. PARKWAY S. (729-8007).

New Discovery Christian Church The Gift of the Magi, a young couple unable to afford presents for each other on their first Christmas together each sacrifices a treasure to provide a gift for the other working at almost tragically funny cross-purposes. www.kudzuplayers.com. $5.

Thur.-Fri., Dec. 10-11, 7 p.m.

I Love You, You’re Perfect, Now Change, fast-paced musical celebrates the ups and downs behind contemporary relationships. $22-$35. Thursdays-Saturdays, 8 p.m. Through Dec. 19.

Peter Pan, the Darling children adventure to Neverland and meet Captain Hook, Tiger Lily, and Tinkerbell. www. playhouseonthesquare.org. $35. Saturdays, Sundays, 2 p.m.

Through Jan. 10.

66 S. COOPER (726-4656).

Sunday Funday holiday pop-up at High Cotton Brewing Co. Sunday Southwest Tennessee Community College

29th Annual Students’ Works and Dances, www.dancersinc. us/. $10. Sat., Dec. 12, 7 p.m.

UNION AVENUE CAMPUS, 737 UNION (333-5300).

A R T I ST R EC E PT I O N S

The Annesdale Park Gallery

Opening reception for “Bedford-Stuyvesant Comes to Memphis,” exhibition of black and white photography by Russell Frederick documenting the rapid gentrification of the Bedford-Stuyvesant neighborhood and honoring displaced residents. theannesdaleparkgallery.com. Sat., Dec. 12, 5-7 p.m.

1290 PEABODY (208-6451).

Theatre Memphis

A Christmas Carol, a Memphis tradition now in its 38th annual production. www.theatrememphis.org. $30. Through Dec. 23.

630 PERKINS EXT. (682-8323).

TheatreWorks

Holiday Judgment, 21st century take on the Dickens’ classic.

Spoiled and rich Holly Wilson hates Christmas, destroys a kid’s bike, gets sued, and disrespects the court. Her sentence teaches her a needed lesson. (946-6140), bluffcitytriarttheatre.com. $20.

Sat., Dec. 12, 7:30-9:15 p.m., and Sun., Dec. 13, 3-5:15 p.m.

2085 MONROE (274-7139).

The Blues Foundation

Opening reception for “Cast of Blues,” exhibition of blues musicians’ life casts by Sharon McConnell-Dickerson. www. blues.org. Fri., Dec. 11, 4-6 p.m.

421 S. MAIN.

Crosstown Arts

Opening reception for “Bellatrix Redux,” exhibition of works by Nick Canterucci. Fri., Dec. 11, 6-9 p.m.

Opening reception for “Extra Celestial,” exhibition of works by artists from the Creative Growth Art Center. www. crosstownarts.org. Fri., Dec. 11, 6-9 p.m.

Memphis Botanic Garden

Opening reception for “uRbanRuraLandscapes,” exhibition of photographs by Stephanie Wexler. www.memphisbotanicgarden.com. Sun., Dec. 13, 3-5 p.m.

750 CHERRY (636-4100).

Metal Museum

Opening reception for “Taiwan International Metal Crafts Competition,” exhibition of objects and jewelry promoting the metal crafts of Taiwan. www.metalmuseum.org. Sun., Dec. 13, 2-4 p.m.

374 METAL MUSEUM DR. (774-6380).

WKNO Studio

Opening reception for “Bartlett Art Association,” exhibition of work by members. www.wkno. org. Sun., Dec. 13, 2-4 p.m.

7151 CHERRY FARMS (458-2521).

continued on page 34

430 N. CLEVELAND (507-8030).

961 VINSON.

December 10-16, 2015

1010 CASINO CENTER IN TUNICA, MS (1-888-24K-PLAY).

Hattiloo Theatre

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33

CALENDAR: DECEMBER 10 - 16

continued from page 32 OT H E R A R T HAPPE N I NGS

Curator Talk: “Extra Celestial”

Creative Growth Art Centerdirector and exhibition curator Tom Di Maria will present “From the Margins to the Mainstream: Artists with Disabilities Today” in conjunction with current exhibition. Sat., Dec. 12, 2 p.m.

CROSSTOWN ARTS, 430 N. CLEVELAND (507-8030), WWW.CROSSTOWNARTS.ORG.

“Disco”

Holiday cash-and-carry sale with work by the entire lineup of CSG artists and more.

Enjoy refreshments, and over half the art holdings of CSG will be available for immediate purchase. Fridays, 6-9 p.m.

Through Dec. 18.

CIRCUITOUS SUCCESSION GALLERY, 500 S. SECOND.

Recycle Runway Fashion Show

Created to inspire students around Memphis to learn to redesign and reuse instead of throw away their old clothes. The show consists of styles created by local high school student artists.

Free. Sat., Dec. 12, 2-4 p.m.

HUTCHISON SCHOOL, 1740 RIDGEWAY (761-2220).

Terry Gower Art Show December 10-16, 2015

Sat.-Sun., Dec. 12-13, noon6 p.m.

CROSSTOWN ARTS, 430 N. CLEVELAND (507-8030), WWW.CROSSTOWNARTS.ORG.

WinterArts 2015

Handcrafted works by the region’s finest artists crafted in glass, metal, wood, fiber, and clay. Mondays-Wednesdays, Saturdays, 10 a.m.-6 p.m., Sundays, 1-5 p.m., Thursdays, 10 a.m.-7 p.m., and Fridays, 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Through Dec. 25.

FORMER LISA KURTS GALLERY, 766 S. WHITE STATION, WINTERARTSMEMPHIS.COM.

C O M E DY

Beth Sholom Synagogue

34

Thursday Night Live!, Beth Sholom’s 60th anniversary. See Gary Gulman, finalist on the NBC reality show Last Comic Standing, who will be joined

by Amy Shanker, a regular at

Chicago’s Laugh Factory. (6833591), www.bsholom.org/. $60.

Thurs., Dec. 10, 6:30-9:30 p.m.

6675 HUMPHREYS (683-3591).

Memphis Gay and Lesbian Community Center

OUTLoud Comedy Showcase, featuring Memphis Improv & Sketch Collective, Jowa Horn, Tommy Oler, and you at an open mic. Bring your best jokes. www.mglcc.org. Sat., Dec. 12, 8 p.m.

892 S. COOPER (278-6422).

Minglewood Hall

Bianca Del Rio’s Rolodex of Hate Comedy Special, get ready for an evening of stories, life experiences, and outrageous comedy as Bianca travels through her Rolodex spewing hate along the way. www.minglewoodhall.com. $35-$75. Fri., Dec. 11, 7 p.m.

1555 MADISON (866-609-1744).

B O O KS I G N I N G S

Booksigning by Graham Sale

Author reads and signs Leo’s Other Christmas. Sat., Dec. 5, 11 a.m.-2 p.m.: Woman’s Exchange; Sat., Dec. 12, noon-1 p.m.: Harbor Town Sq.; Through Dec. 31: www.memphishandmade.com; Mon., Dec. 21, 10 a.m.: The Knowledge Tree, 2095 Exeter # 40.

WWW.LEOSOTHERCHRISTMAS.COM.

Booksigning by James Paavola

Author discusses and signs Cast the First Stone: Murder in Memphis. Sat., Dec. 12, 2 p.m.

THE BOOKSELLERS AT LAURELWOOD, 387 PERKINS EXT. (683-9801), WWW.THEBOOKSELLERSATLAURELWOOD.COM.

S PO R TS/ F IT N ES S .

Star Wars Skate

Dress as favorite character featuring Star Wars trivia and DJ. Fri., Dec. 11, 7-9 p.m.

MID-SOUTH ICE HOUSE, 10705 RIDGEWAY INDUSTRIAL. (8818544), MIDSOUTHICEHOUSE.COM.

F U N D -R AI S E R S

Hope House Wish List Item Drive

For every wish list item donated during December at both the Collierville and Mid-

Jammies and Jingles Breakfast at the Children’s Museum of Memphis Saturday town boutiques, Eclectic Eye will donate $5, up to $500. See Hope House website for wish list items. Through Dec. 31.

ECLECTIC EYE, 242 S. COOPER (276-3937), WWW.HOPEHOUSEMEMPHIS.ORG.

S P EC IA L EVE NTS

“Bears for Le Bonheur”

For each donor that gives blood or platelets during the designated dates, Lifeblood will donate a stuffed bear to a Le Bonheur patient. See website for locations. Through Dec. 15.

WWW.LIFEBLOOD.ORG.

The Metamorphosis Project

Admission includes open bar and appetizers from local Memphis restaurants and live auction to benefit LGBTQ homeless youth and the MGLCC youth services program. $50. Sat., Dec. 12, 5-8 p.m.

NESHOBA UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CHURCH, 7350 RALEIGHLAGRANGE (266-2626), WWW. MGLCC.ORG.

H O LI DAY EVE NTS

Made in the Mid-South: A Winter Wonderland

Local merchant holiday showcase benefiting the Fallen Officer Memorial Fund and FRAGO. $10. Sun., Dec. 13, 10 a.m.-7 p.m.

COOPER WALKER PLACE, 1015 S. COOPER (303-990-3999), WWW. MADEINMYCOMMUNITY.COM.

20th Annual Charles Billings Christmas Concert

Billings will be joined by his friends, Shane Beeson, Carol Craig, Gregory Odom, Pamela Poletti, and Jeanne Elting Simmons. Sadly, this will be the final year, so you don’t want to miss it. Sun., Dec. 13, 5:30 p.m.

SHADY GROVE PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH, 5530 SHADY GROVE (683-7329), WWW.SHADYGROVEPRES.ORG.

CALENDAR: DECEMBER 10 - 16 All Saints Christmas Concert

Community carol sing and concert of favorite Advent and Christmas music with flute, hammered dulcimer, piano, and organ.Wassail reception follows.

Free admission, donations accepted. Sun., Dec. 13.

ALL SAINTS EPISCOPAL CHURCH, 1508 S WHITE STATION (685-7333), WWW.ALLSAINTSMEMPHIS.ORG.

Bartlett Lights

Tune your radio to FM 101.7 while viewing. Donations benefit local charities. Through Dec. 31.

BARTLETT LIGHTS, 4064 SUNNY MEADOWS, WWW. BARTLETTLIGHTS.COM.

Christmas in Collierville

Children of all ages are invited to bring a Christmas wish list to give to Santa. Bring a camera. Saturdays, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Through Dec. 19.

Holiday Store

Jammies and Jingles Breakfast

Museum Store will be offering items, from one-ofa-kind jewelry to grilling skewers for the holiday gift giving. Through Jan. 3, 2016.

Wear Christmas PJs, family fun, holiday memories, a pancake breakfast, pictures with Santa, face painting, crafts, holiday movie, and cutest jammies contest.

Advance purchase required. $12 members, $17 nonmembers. Sat., Dec. 12, 9:30 a.m.

METAL MUSEUM, 374 METAL MUSEUM DR. (774-6380), WWW.METALMUSEUM.ORG.

CHILDREN’S MUSEUM OF MEMPHIS, 2525 CENTRAL (320-3170), WWW.CMOM.COM.

In the Christmas Spirit with the Maitre D’s

Magic of Memphis Holiday Spectacular

Memphis’ Maitre D’s cover Booker T. and the MGs’ classic holiday album, In the Christmas Spirit.

Featuring refreshments, craft activities, and gift shop promos. $10 Donation. Fri., Dec. 11, 6-8 p.m.

Memphis Symphony Orchestra holiday concert. $15-$79. Sat., Dec. 12, 7:30 p.m.

CANNON CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS, MEMPHIS COOK CONVENTION CENTER, 255 N. MAIN (TICKETS, 525-1515), WWW.MEMPHISSYMPHONY.ORG.

STAX MUSEUM OF AMERICAN SOUL MUSIC, 926 E. MCLEMORE (261-6338), WWW.STAXMUSEUM.COM.

The Magic of the Holidays Light Show Residential light show. Weather permitting.

Through Dec. 27, 5:30 p.m.

EASTHILL SUBDIVISION, KIRBY WHITTEN/ST. ELMO, WWW.THEMAGICOFTHEHOLIDAYS.COM.

Memphis Arts Collective Holiday Show & Sale

Photography, jewelry, textiles, vintage collectibles, prints, paintings, pottery, and more. Solstice party, Dec. 19. Through Dec. 24.

1501 UNION, MIDTOWN (833-9533), WWW.MEMPHISARTSCOLLECTIVE.COM.

continued on page 36

COLLIERVILLE TOWN SQUARE.

Christmas in Collierville Home Tour

Tour five Collierville homes decorated with holiday decor. Benefits multiple nonprofit organizations within the area. $20. Sat., Dec. 12, 10 a.m.-4 p.m.

A Fitz Table Games Exclusive

MORTON MUSEUM OF COLLIERVILLE HISTORY, 196 MAIN, (457-2650), COLLIERVILLECONTEMPORARYCLUB.ORG.

The Christmas Spectacular 2015

Featuring Lindenwood Chancel Choir, orchestra, soloists, organist-conductor Chris Nemec, and guests Anthony & Beard. $18. Sun., Dec. 13, 7:30 p.m.

LINDENWOOD CHRISTIAN CHURCH, 2400 UNION (458-8506), WWW.LINDENWOOD.NET.

Enchanted Forest Festival of Trees

Animated characters set in the magical snowy setting. Santa greets guests at the end of the Forest and poses for holiday photos. Benefiting Le Bonheur Children’s Hospital. $6. Through Dec. 31.

$10,000

Saturday, January 9 • 9pm

MEMPHIS PINK PALACE MUSEUM, 3050 CENTRAL (636-2362), WWW.LEBONHEUR.ORG.

Receive entries December 1 - January 8 while playing Blackjack, 3-Card Poker, Roulette, Mississippi Stud and Craps.

Festival of Carols

Annual favorite is fun for the whole family featuring sing-along carols and festive atmosphere of worship.

Free. Sun., Dec. 13, 6-7 p.m.

SECOND PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH, 4055 POPLAR (454-0034), WWW.2PC.ORG.

HOLIDAY

Garden Path Studio Holiday Open House

Featuring live music, festive food, and cool gifts including terrariums, ceramics, photographs, paintings, wearable woven art, jewelry, and more. Sun., Dec. 13, 1-6 p.m.

MEGA CASH

GARDEN PATH STUDIO, 597 MADISON (828-3685), GREENMANSIONSMEMPHIS.COM.

Germantown Holiday Parade

Uniformed Marines and volunteers will collect new, unwrapped toys for children through 14 years old along route beginning at the corner of Kimbrough and Farmington, ends at Germantown Athletic Club. Sat., Dec. 12, 2 p.m.

GOING ALL IN Cash and Promo Chips Giveaway

G I V E AWAY

Receive

5X entries on Sundays

Fridays and Saturdays December 4 - 19 • 6pm - 10pm

Receive

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 26

10X entries on

Win up to one $250 prize in the 6pm-9pm drawings, and one $500 prize in the 10pm drawing.

One winner will win $500 CASH every 15 minutes from 6pm – midnight!

Mondays

Light snacks, drinks, and kickoff for the 2016 grant cycle announcing the new grant theme. RSVP to vlangston@cfgm.org. Thurs., Dec. 10, 5:30 p.m.

COMMUNITY FOUNDATION OF GREATER MEMPHIS, 1900 UNION (684-6605), WWW.CFGM.ORG.

Glitchmas Holiday Artist Market

Art sale and jazz night featuring Alex Gatez.

Fri., Dec. 11, 6-10 p.m.

GLITCH, 2180 COWDEN (734-6136), GLITCHGALLERY.TUMBLR.COM.

Holiday Bazaar

Coffee and pastries for holiday shoppers. Handcrafted items and archival photographs, films, and recordings from the Center. Sat., Dec. 12, 11 a.m.-4 p.m.

CENTER FOR SOUTHERN FOLKLORE, 123 S. MAIN AT PEABODY TROLLEY STOP (525-3655), WWW.SOUTHERNFOLKLORE.COM.

Holiday Concert featuring the Germantown Symphony with the Germantown Community Chorus $14. Sat., Dec. 12, 7 p.m.

CH E F M A N 3 - I N -1

POINT VALUE

GIF T GIVE AWAY

SUNDAYS, DECEMBER 13 & 20

Christmas Day

TAKE HOME ALL THREE GIFTS!

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 25

Simply earn 200 points playing slots or tables any time between 4am and 8pm. Visit the Hotel Lobby gift distribution area between 2pm - 9pm to receive ALL THREE GIFTS.

3pm – 5pm and 9pm – 11pm Video Poker earns half the stated amount.

CYBER HOTEL

DEALS

HOTEL ROOM SALE AT THE FITZ UNTIL 12/13!

2499 $3499

$

per night

Sunday – Thursday

per night

Bed & Breakfast Special Sunday – Thursday

Holiday periods are excluded.

Holiday Pop-Up Shop

PINK DIVA CUPCAKERY AND CUISINE, 936 FLORIDA (946-0056), WWW.PINKDIVACUPCAKERY.COM.

per night

Friday & Saturday

BOOK YOUR ROOM FOR DECEMBER & JANUARY. MENTION CODE: CYBER

GERMANTOWN PERFORMING ARTS CENTER, 1801 EXETER (751-7500), WWW.GPACWEB.COM.

Vendors with wares. Holiday cupcake orders receive a 15 percent discount. Sun., Dec. 13, 1-6 p.m.

69

$

Must be 21 and a Key Rewards member. See Cashier • Players Club for rules. While supplies last. Photo may not be representative of actual gift. Management reserves the right to cancel, change and modify the event or promotion notice to the Mississippi Gaming Commission where required. Gaming restricted patrons prohibited. Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-522-4700.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

PLAY & EARN

GiVE 365 Holiday Cocktails

m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

GERMANTOWN ATHLETIC CLUB, 1801 EXETER, WWW. GERMANTOWN-TN.GOV.

35

CALENDAR: DECEMBER 10 - 16 continued from page 35 Memphis Indie Holiday Market

Food, art, clothing, paper goods, vintage items, and more.

Sat., Dec. 12, 11 a.m.-5 p.m.

MUDDY’S COFFEE & BAKE SHOP, 585 S. COOPER (683-8844),

Music in the Galleries

Enjoy music in the galleries.

Featuring Jeremy Shrader on trumpet: Dec.12; Michelle Shrader on guitar: Dec. 20; Tamar Love on cello: Dec. 27.

Sundays, 2-4 p.m.

THE DIXON GALLERY & GARDENS, 4339 PARK (761-5250), WWW.DIXON.ORG.

A Piano Christmas Concert

Philip Wesley, Joseph Akins, and John Albert Thomas perform their Christmas arrangements, original music, and share stories. $20. Fri.-Sat., Dec. 11-12, 7:30-9:30 p.m.

BEETHOVEN CLUB, 263 S. MCLEAN (218-6284), WWW.BEETHOVENCLUB. EVENTBRITE.COM/.

Santa’s Helpers Skate

Day-skate with Santa and Crush the Polar Bear. Wear Santa or elf hat for door prizes. Sat., Dec. 12, 1:30-4 p.m.

MID-SOUTH ICE HOUSE, 10705 RIDGEWAY INDUSTRIAL RD. (8818544), MIDSOUTHICEHOUSE.COM.

Snowy Nights in My Big Backyard

FO O D & D R I N K EVE NTS

Bring the family to celebrate the holiday season. Play in the “snow,” sip hot cocoa or spiced tea, create a winter craft, enjoy games, and a musical light show. Closed December 24 and 25. $8 members, $10 nonmembers. Fri., Dec. 11, 5:30-8:30 p.m., and Sat., Dec. 12, 5:30-8:30 p.m.

Frank Sinatra’s 100th Birthday Dinner

This four-course feast will include some of Sinatra’s favorite things, including traditional Italian cuisine and Jack Daniel’s.

Whiskey flight, add $30. $85$115. Sat., Dec. 12, 6:30 p.m.

CHEZ PHILIPPE, THE PEABODY, 149 UNION (529-4188), WWW.PEABODYMEMPHIS.COM.

MEMPHIS BOTANIC GARDEN, 750 CHERRY (636-4100), MEMPHISBOTANICGARDEN.COM.

Memphis Grilled Cheese Festival

Starry Nights

Biggest holiday light show and festival in the Mid-South benefiting Shelby Farms Park and Shelby Farms Greenline. $20-$150. Through Dec. 27.

Cook-off to see who has the most cheesiest, most ridiculous grilled cheese — and, of course, best tomato soup. Sun., Dec. 13, noon-6 p.m.

HI-TONE, 412-414 N. CLEVELAND (278-TONE), WWW.MEMPHISGRILLEDCHEESE.COM

SHELBY FARMS, 500 N. PINE LAKE (767-PARK), WWW.SHELBYFARMSPARK.ORG.

The Stirring: A Soul Stirring Christmas

Art and music for the season.

Sun., Dec. 13, 5:30 p.m.

HOPE PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH, 8500 WALNUT GROVE (INFO, 755-7721, EXT. 1900), WWW.HOPECHURCHMEMPHIS.ORG.

Sunday Funday

Holiday pop-up shop from Lesouque featuring jewelry, scarves, handbags, and home decor from independent designers in Memphis and around the world. Free beer, food truck, dog friendly. Sun., Dec. 13, 1-6 p.m.

The Twelve Tastes of Christmas

Tantalize your taste buds with winter martinis such as the Green Grinch and Creme Brulee. $35. Sat., Dec. 12, 7-11 p.m.

THE GALLERY AT MADISON SQUARE, 1819 MADISON (949-5999), STEMMEDGLASS.COM.

December 10-16, 2015

CHRISTMAS TRIO

36

Friday, Dec. 25, 10:30am-2:30pm.

Christmas feast plus Peabody brunch favorites and champagne. $68* per adult, $28* per child (ages 5-12).

For reservations: 901.529.3668.

Chez Philippe

Friday, Dec. 25, 5:00pm-8:00pm.

Holiday elegance, 3 sumptuous courses, impeccably served. $85* per person, $115 wine pairings.

For reservations: 901.529. 3687.

Featuring hot cocoa, holiday goodies, s’mores pit, kids ornament-making area, caroling, and a tree lighting. Sat., Dec. 12, 3-6 p.m.

ST. LUKE’S UNITED METHODIST CHURCH, 480 S. HIGHLAND (452-6262)

“Extra Celestial” opens Friday at Crosstown Arts Zoo Lights

See snow at the Farm, Santa in his shop, reindeer, thousands of holiday lights, and more. $6 members, $8 nonmembers.

Fridays, Saturdays, 5:30-9:30 p.m. Through Dec. 30.

MEMPHIS ZOO, 2000 PRENTISS PLACE IN OVERTON PARK (333-6500), MEMPHISZOO.ORG.

HIGH COTTON BREWING CO., 598 MONROE (543-4444),

Christmas Brunch, Mezzanine

University District Tree Lighting

Capriccio Grill

Friday, Dec. 25, 11:00am-10:00pm.

A feast for the whole family that keeps you out of the kitchen. $36* adult, $16* child (12 & under).

For reservations: 901.529. 3687. * plus tax & gratuity.

149 Union Avenue . Memphis, Tennessee 38103 901.529.4000 . 800.PEABODY . www.peabodymemphis.com

F I LM

Heart of a Dog

A film about telling and remembering and forgetting, and how we put together the fragments that make up our lives. $9. Wed., Dec. 16, 7-8:45 p.m.

MEMPHIS BROOKS MUSEUM OF ART, 1934 POPLAR (544-6200), BROOKSMUSEUM.ORG.

SUBMISSION DEADLINE FOR EVENTS DATED DECEMBER 24THJANUARY 6TH IS DECEMBER 17TH.

FOOD NEWS By Susan Ellis

Helpings Now open: Cafe Le Roux by DeJaVu and the Choo.

mimicking a train station. There are toy trains in the window, plus luggage. On the wall is a mural of a train, vibrant in red, blue, purple, and yellow.

The theme extends to the menu as well. Sandwiches include the Conductor (chargrilled or fried chicken breast), the Brakeman (red smoked or polish sausage); and the Engineer (po’boy with shrimp, chicken, or catfish). Tee’s Engine Starter a choice of chicken wings in a number of flavors, including hot, lemon pepper, and honey gold. Chris’ Caboose is a plate of chicken tenders served with fries. (Prices range from $3.95 to $11.95.)

There are salads, too, a daily chef ’s special, and meat-and-two plates. For dessert, butter cookies like you had in school and Suh’s homemade pound cake.

“Some people don’t get home with it, if they take it to go,” Dandridge says of the poundcake.

“I have the entrepreneurial spirit. He has the cooking talent,” Lisa Dandridge Dandridge says they chose the location because of the diverse neighborhood. says. “Together, we make the perfect couple.” And together, Dandridge and her There’s the University of Memphis nearby, the Fairgrounds, the Country Club, and husband, J.C., opened The Choo in August. tons of homes. The train comes by about twice an hour, Dandridge says. When cars NitOV Mstopped BER 3track, 0 they go out and greet the drivers and hand them a menu.

The Choo is a play on “chew.” (“You get that chew, that bite — hopefully, will E are at the be marvelous,” Dandridge explains.) The name is also a nod to the restaurant’s The Choo is open Wednesday through Sunday, 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. Parking is location at Southern and Semmes — right next to the train tracks. Inside, there are available on the street.

The Choo, 3045 Southern, 324-3246 clocks on the wall with times for New York, Los Angeles, Sante Fe, and Memphis, HOLIDAY RECORD RELEASE PARTY

SUSAN MARSHALL DECEMBER 15

JUNIOR BROWN 12/9 THE NIGHTOWLS 8PM | 12/10 JAMES & THE ULTRASOUNDS 9PM | 12/11 88 BONES 10PM | 12/12 NAUGHTY PROFESSOR 10PM | 12/13 THE MOTEL MIRRORS 8PM | 12/14 JOHN PAUL KEITH & FRIENDS 6PM | 12/15 JUNIOR BROWN 8PM | 12/16 ASHLEY MCBRYDE 8PM 2 1 1 9 M A D I S O N AV E N U E M E M P H I S , T N 3 8 1 0 4

DECEMBER 31

NEW YEAR’S EVE

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m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

Gary Williams of DeJaVu (left) and Dereck Allen of Cafe Le Roux

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

JUSTIN FOX BURKS

S

ix months ago, Dereck Allen came to Memphis from New Orleans to interview for a job with Gary Williams of DeJaVu. He got the job, but while still in Memphis, a horrific situation occurred, and Allen ended up losing his left arm. He returned to New Orleans to recuperate. “[Williams] would call me every day,” Allen says. “I thought I would probably never work again.”

Williams eventually convinced Allen to return to Memphis to become general manager of Cafe Le Roux by DeJaVu, which opened about six weeks ago in the United Way building on Tillman.

Stars aligned for this project. Williams had decided to turn the original DeJaVu on Florida into a catering kitchen. Then he bumped into Cassi Conyers of Pink Diva Cupcakery. She told him was looking for her own space, so he leased the Florida building to her. He heard from United Way a couple of weeks later.

The deal: Williams would run United Way’s restaurant and provide their catering, and he would run DeJaVu’s catering operation from the building’s spacious, well-stocked kitchen. “I didn’t have to buy a pot,” Williams says.

Kenneth Robinson, president and CEO of the United Way of the Mid-South, says that when the organization moved into the building in April, he wanted a world-class restaurant on-site, one that would serve not only the 40 employees of United Way and other businesses in the building but also the general public. He wanted a chef with name recognition who could provide healthy options.

Cafe Le Roux is a nonprofit, serving breakfast and lunch. Along with Allen, there are two employees, Elizabeth Boyd and Naomi Williams, getting folks fed.

Williams describes Cafe Le Roux as sort of like Piccadilly, with diners picking what they want. “Turkey necks, shrimp étoufée, black-eyed peas, candied yams, meatloaf — you can’t go wrong with this stuff,” he says, listing that day’s offerings.

Breakfast items include omelets, breakfast sandwiches, pancakes with sausage or bacon and eggs, and French toast with sausage or bacon and eggs. For lunch, in addition to the meat-and-two offerings, there’s a salad bar, daily specials, soups, seafood gumbo, quesadillas, po’boys, and sandwiches. There are desserts as well.

Prices top off at $9.50.

As for the name, Cafe Le Roux, it’s cool, and as Williams says, “The roux starts everything. It’s the roots. It’s the beginning. It’s the glue, man.”

Cafe Le Roux by DeJaVu, 1005 Tillman, 207-0683

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WEEK DECEMBER 10 - DECEMBER 16

THURS, DECEMBER 10

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Jeff Jordan 6-10PM DJ Big Al Spins the Hits

from The 90’s 10:30PM-4:30AM THIRD FLOOR

DJ Crumbz ALL NIGHT SAT, DECEMBER 12 FIRST FLOOR

Drew Erwin 6-10PM Kind of a Big Deal 10:30PM-2:30AM THIRD FLOOR

DJ Crumbz ALL NIGHT SUN, DECEMBER 13

After Dark Band 7:30-11:30PM

DJ Nyce 11:30PM-4:30AM MON-WED FIRST FLOOR Mercury Blvd DJ Tubbz 11PM-3AM 152 BEALE ST • DOWNTOWN MEMPHIS • 901.544.7011

Broadway Pizza Old-fashioned pizza house with a lovely, comfortable atmosphere, where the staff has you feeling like you are in their pizza home. Delicious hot pizzas overflowing with toppings of your choice. Appetizers, salads, spaghetti, catfish, cheeseburgers, Philly cheese steaks, Broadway whole wings, daily plate lunch specials,

and more. Holiday drink specials at both locations! Located in Memphis’ Broad Avenue Arts District, and, look out, Memphis, NOW a second location on Mendenhall stocked with a full bar. Legendary pizza since 1977.

Call-in orders are welcome!

2581 Broad • 454-7930 629 S. Mendenhall • 207-1546 broadwaypizzamemphis.com

OPEN DAILY FOR LUNCH & DINNER WITH LIVE MUSIC NIGHTLY 315 Beale....steps away from the FedEx Forum December 10-16, 2015

UPCOMING EVENTS: LOVE & THEFT FREE SHOW - DEC 15 APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION GNR TRIBUTE - DEC 19 • NEW YEAR’S EVE - DEC 31 • AND MORE!

TinRoofMemphis.com 38

@TinRoofMemphis

Kooky Canuck Kooky Canuck Downtown and Cordova offer daily drink specials, Tuesday’s 34-ounce specialty drinks are half off!

Every Saturday and Sunday 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., we offer premium mimosas, Bloody Marys, and Bloody Caesars for only $5. We have private party spaces available at both locations, and we can cater any size group, party, or office.

97 S. Second • 578-9800 1250 N. Germantown Pkwy. • 800-2453 kookycanuck.com

Peabody Lobby Bar and the Corner Bar Try the frosty Snowflake Martini — Malibu rum and Godiva White Chocolate Liqueur in a martini glass rimmed with sweetened coconut shavings — at the Peabody Lobby Bar or Corner Bar inside the “South’s Grand Hotel.”

149 Union • 529-4000 peabodymemphis.com Pearl’s Oyster House Warm up your holiday with the Fireside Comfort, a cozy concoction of Baileys Espresso and Rumple Minze served with a cinnamon stick.

299 S. Main • 522-9070 pearlsoysterhouse.com continued on page 40

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Sean’s Cafe Now serving Breakfast.

Eat Healthy, Live Healthy. New Ownership. New Menu.

Catering and Delivery • 1651 Union Avenue • 901.274.3917

m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

Celtic Crossing Laethanta Saoire Sona Daoibh! (Gaelic for happy holidays.) St. Patrick’s Day isn’t the only time to party at the Celtic Crossing! Book our private Ballina Room or reserve some tables on Memphis’ favorite heated patio. Food and beverage options are customizable to your needs, and there is always something going on for entertainment.

Reserve your space today.

903 S. Cooper • 274-5151 celticcrossingmemphis.com

Lafayette’s Music Room Specialty cocktails, local brews, great wines, and high-quality spirits from our upstairs and downstairs bars match perfectly with listening to live bands on our stage and enjoying Southern food with an attitude from our kitchen.

2119 Madison • 207-5097 lafayettesmusicroom.com

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

The Buccaneer Lounge There’s nothing like a hot winter cocktail to warm you up. The Buccaneer Lounge offers hot drink specials every Saturday, perfect for celebrating the season.

1368 Monroe • 278-0909

39

continued from page 39 RockHouse Live Memphis Grill & Venue Celebrate the holidays right with RockHouse Live Memphis Grill & Venue. Enjoy our winter specials Monday through Friday, 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Brrrring on the celebrating with our new frozen drink machine.

Specials: $2 select domestics and Fireball; $3 Jäger, Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Fire and well liquors; $4 Cuervo and house wines; $5 burger and fries.

2586 Poplar • 324-6300 5709 Raleigh Lagrange • 386-7222 rockhouselive.com

Broadway Pizza House Legendary Pizza Since 1977

2581 Broad Avenue (901) 454-7930

Memphis Magazine’s

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629 South Mendenhall (901) 207-1546

Sports Junction Enjoy the season watching sports and drinking your favorite drink.

Domestic drafts are only $1 from 2 to 7 p.m. daily. Or choose a festive mixed drink made with premium spirits from our cocktail menu.

1911 Poplar • 244-7904 sportsjunctionmemphis.com Terrace at the River Inn Toast the holidays with the Passion Peach Martini made with pomegranate vodka, peach schnapps, and orange juice, lemon

juice, and fresh ground cinnamon.

50 Harbor Town Square • 260-3366 terracememphis.com Tin Roof Sixteen beers on tap featuring Ghost River Grindhouse Ale (for Grizz season), a large bottle and can selection, custom cocktails, and great holiday specials! Happy Hour — half off appetizers and $1 off all beer and liquor, Monday through Friday, 2-7 p.m.

315 Beale • 527-9911 tinroofmemphis.com Young Avenue Deli Pick Young Avenue Deli for your holiday parties this season! We have pool tables, games, and great food and can accommodate large groups.

Will rent out the entire restaurant.

Please email tessa@youngavenuedeli. com. Christmas Day we open at 5 p.m. We have 36 draft selections and 130 can and bottle options. Also a large selection of seasonal beers.

2119 Young • 278-0034 youngavenuedeli.com

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FILM REVIEW By Chris McCoy

Spike Lee Vs. the World Chi-Raq is the wild musical comedy about gun violence you didn’t know you needed.

T

Teyonah Parris

In isolation, it’s a powerful scene, as Lee and screenwriter Kevin Willmott indict the whole sociopolitical system that keeps African Americans locked in cycles of poverty and violence. But in the context of the film, it’s a momentum killer. Free to follow his wildest impulses, Lee constructs one killer image after another, but little thought seems to have been given as to how it all fits together, which means Chi-Raq adds up to less than the sum of its impressive parts.

It’s inspiring to see a talent of Lee’s caliber swing for the fences. Chi-Raq may not be perfect, but I can’t stop thinking about it.

Chi-Raq Now playing Multiple locations

m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

I would be content listening to Jackson speak in rhyme for two hours. Fortunately, Lee introduces us to Teyonah Parris as Lysistrata, a powerhouse of confidence and sexual energy. After witnessing the horrors of street violence and having her apartment burned down by a rival gang out to kill her boyfriend Chi-Raq, Lysistrata is inspired

by Miss Helen (Angela Bassett) to organize a sex strike, asserting their power by “seizing the means of reproduction.” The gangs will either end their senseless violence or go without booty. The sex strike spreads until, as Dave Chappelle says in a hilarious cameo as a strip-club owner, “Even the hoes is no-shows.”

The sprawling cast includes Wesley Snipes, Jennifer Hudson, and token white guy John Cusack as a priest who shouts himself hoarse at a funeral for a little girl killed in the gang crossfire. Cusack looks more engaged and passionate onscreen than he has in years, but his big scene is also a symptom of what’s wrong with Chi-Raq.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

here’s so much to say about Spike Lee’s Chi-Raq, I don’t know where to begin.

One of the film’s themes is the nature of power. Since its inception, the film industry has been characterized by a struggle for power between directors, producers, stars, and writers. As seen in Trumbo, the first to lose the battle were the writers, so they decamped to television. The power of the old-line Hollywood studios declined in the late 1960s, so the 1970s saw the ascendance of the director and, as a result, a second golden age of American film. In 1980, the directors’ power was broken on the rocks of Heaven’s Gate, and by the end of the decade, movie stars like Arnold Schwarzenneger and Tom Cruise were in charge, commanding high salaries and exerting creative control. The indie film revolution of the 1990s, which Spike Lee helped kick off, was on some level an attempt to reclaim the directors’ power. Now, in the twilight of the movie stars, power has reverted to the producers, and so resources are tied up in making endless sequels and reboots of proven properties. Enter Amazon, the internet retail powerhouse who is making a big push into video. For their first foray into theatrical film, they tapped Lee and apparently gave him free rein. Lee responded by going absolutely insane.

2015 finds Lee in a familiar state: energized with righteous rage. The director could have taken a look at widespread reports of police brutality against people of color and the resulting Black Lives Matter movement, pointed at his 1989 masterpiece Do the Right Thing, and said “I told you so!” Instead, he made Chi-Raq, which is like nothing else in theaters today. It’s a satire, a comedy, and a musical. It’s also based on a 2,500-year-old Greek play called Lysistrata, and so it is written mostly in rhyming verse. And yet, Chi-Raq is even weirder than it sounds.

The first five minutes or so are essentially a lyric music video for “Pray 4 My City,” with nothing but text and an animated image of a map of the United States made up entirely of guns. When we finally do see someone on screen, it’s the rapper Chi-Raq (Nick Cannon) rocking a packed club. Then the action freezes, and we meet Dolmedes, the narrator/chorus played by national treasure Samuel L. Jackson in full Rufus Thomas mode.

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TV REVIEW By Ben Siler

Marvel vs. Rape Culture Jessica Jones is a superhero show with a conscience.

As Marvel continues to infect our lives with stridently competent comic book adaptations, it’s nice to see what they produce actually be about something. Previous incarnations dealt with joy (Guardians of the Galaxy) and the security state (Captain America: The Winter Soldier).

Jessica Jones deals with rape.

Kilgrave (David Tennant) is a walking nightmare. His power is mind control.

He’s constantly using and throwing away people to serve his immediate needs, sexual and otherwise, which results in support groups, self-medication, discussions of the cycle of abuse, and post-traumatic stress disorder. This is unique for

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MOVIES

a mainstream narrative. Like Preacher’s Jesse Custer, he can compel someone to his will just by speaking to them. At any point in the story, he will walk into the room with a purple suit and a sneer and demand strangers do his bidding. His attitude is one of entitlement to other people’s bodies, and dismissive sarcasm to empathy. His most frequent dictum is a short, curt “Leave.” His one passion is stalking Krysten Ritter’s title character, a superpowered private eye who deals with having been in his mental grasp by descending into alcoholism.

Jones is a Hulk-Buffy variant wrapped in friendly Marvel packaging. She can’t

SINCE

1915

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Ridgeway Cinema Grill CAFE • IMPORTED BEER & WINE • LUXURY SEATING

December 10-16, 2015

Macbeth R In the Heart of the Sea PG13 Creed PG13

Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 PG13 Spectre PG13

FULL MENU • IMPORTED BEER & WINE LUXURY SEATING

Brooklyn PG13 Trumbo R Spotlight R Spectre PG13

IMPORTED BEER & WINE • EXPANDED CONCESSIONS • LUXURY SEATING • ALL DIGITAL CINEMA •

In the Heart of the Sea PG13 3-D In the Heart of the Sea PG13 Big Stone Gap PG13 Krampus PG13 Chi-Raq R Creed PG13 The Good Dinosaur PG 3-D The Good Dinosaur PG Victor Frankenstein PG13 Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2 PG13

TUESDAY 12/15 Rifftrax Live: Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny 7:00pm

The Night Before R Secret in Their Eyes PG13 Love the Coopers PG13 Spectre PG13 The Peanuts Movie G SATURDAY 12/12 Metropolitan Opera: The Magic Flute Encore 11:55am

THURSDAY 12/17 Star Wars Marathon 4:00am Star Wars: The Force Awakens 7:00pm

MALCO THEATRES CORPORATE EVENTS • MEETINGS CHURCH RENTALS • GROUP RATES

kill her nemesis because she needs to prove he compelled a victim to murder; he won’t kill her because he professes love. This makes for a wonderful fluidity between hero and villain. He shows up to talk, and it’s terrifying. We could have gotten a version of this character that delves into the mind control aspect as wish fulfillment, and his British accent as suave. (He is often seen with women and money, or having people take his insults literally.) Instead the emphasis is on what it feels like to have your mind scrambled.

In the support group Jones starts, victims talk about a loss of identity and being overcome by shame for things as simple as Kilgrave asking for their jacket.

Ritter is great at both snappy dialogue and weightier PTSD moments. She enlists a large number of allies, including fellow comic book heroes Luke Cage (Mike Colter) and Trish Walker (Rachael Taylor). Kilgrave’s horror is the show’s star, unusually scary for a Marvel villain.

His dialogue is often textbook chauvinistic defenses of sexual assault, and his psychology based on abuse as a child: the medical experiments which gave him his powers, done by his parents.

Like other Marvel entertainment, there are tonally off supporting characters, once and future comic-book plots

Krysten Ritter in Jessica Jones awkwardly grafted on, and wastes of good actors. The ending is anticlimactic, the action repetitive kick-punching.

Overall, it says something. Showrunner Melissa Rosenberg has said she was trying to make a blatant corrective to the use of sexual assault as a plot device on shows like Game of Thrones, where no time or realism is given to the psychology of victims or perpetrators. The result is a corporate product that has the ring of something honest and direct.

Jessica Jones Now streaming Netflix

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42

5101 Sanderlin Ave., Ste. 104b • Next to Fox & Hound

ORDER ONLINE AT MALCO.COM OR GROUPSALES@MALCO.COM

visit mifa.org to volunteer.

HELP WANTED • REAL ESTATE

901 575 9400 classifieds@memphisflyer.com

EDUCATION AIRLINE CAREERS Begin here- Get started by training as FAA certified Aviation Technician.

Financial aid for qualified students.

Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance.

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GENERAL PHONE ACTRESSES From home. Must have dedicated land line and great voice. 21+. Up to $18 per hour. Flex HRS./ most Wknds.

1-800-403-7772 Lipservice.net (AAN CAN)

HOSPITALITY/ RESTAURANT BROADWAY PIZZA is now interviewing for new members to our team. All positions available.

Apply in person, no phone calls please. 2581 Broad; 629 S. Mendenhall, 10am-10pm.

RETAIL RAFFERTY’S We are looking for service minded individuals, that don’t mind working hard. We work hard, but make $.

Apply in the store. 505 N Gtown Pkwy SPORTS JUNCTION Experienced Servers & Bar Manager needed. Call 244-7904 and ask for Norma. 1911 Poplar Ave.

HELP WANTED Baristas and Cooks. Reliable transportation required. Apply Monday through Friday between 2pm and 4pm at East Memphis location. 6070 Poplar Ave Ste #110 Memphis, TN 38139 (Located in the Triad Center next to Evolve Bank).

WIZARD’S Seeks mature, motivated, reliable Salesperson. Computer skills needed. $9 hrly + depends on experience. Work a retail scheduled as required. Adapt quickly to fast paced environment. Apply in person at 1999 Madison Ave, MonThur, 11am-5pm. Or email resume to wizxtoo@bellsouth.net

APTS AND CONDOS FOR RENT

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COPELAND SERVICES, L.L.C. Hiring Armed State Licensed Officers/Unarmed Officers Three Shifts Available Same Day Interview 1661 International Place 901-2585872 or 901-818-3187 Interview in Professional Attire

PART-TIME & FULL-TIME | DAY & NIGHT SHIFTS AVAILABLE SAM’S TOWN HOTEL & Gambling Hall in Tunica, MS is looking for the next Direct Marketing Pro, is it you? We need someone who has excellent organizational skills, knows Direct Mail and Database Marketing, previous Casino Marketing experience preferred. Must have strong written and oral communication skills and the ability to meet deadlines in the fast paced casino environment, proficient in Microsoft Office, CMS and LMS. Must be able to obtain and maintain a MS Gaming Commission Work Permit, pass a prescreening including but not limited to background and drug screen. To apply, log on to boydcareers.com and follow the prompts to Tunica. Boyd Gaming Corp is a drug free workplace and equal opportunity employer. Must be at least 21 to apply.

Full time employees eligible for paid vacation, 401K and other benefits

THE FOLLOWING LOCATIONS HAVE EITHER FULL-TIME OR PART-TIME POSITIONS AVAILABLE: Huey’s Cordova

DOWNTOWN APTS MINUTES FROM DOWNTOWN Come visit the brand new Cleaborn Pointe at Heritage Landing.

Located just minutes from historic Downtown Memphis. 2BR Apts & Townhomes $707; 3BR Apts & Townhomes $813. Community Room, Computer Room, Fitness Room. A smoke free community. 440 South LauderdaleMemphis, TN 38126 | 901-254-7670.

DOWNTOWN HOMES FOR RENT 1364 ISLAND TOWN DR. 3BR/2.5BA, $1625/mo. Call MTC (901) 756-4469

Retail SaleS

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Cleaning is a physical job but all tools are company provided. Send Resume to cleannpink@msn.com

COOPER YOUNG 1978 Oliver. Adorable 4BR/2BA brick home. Features include a large inviting front porch, FP, built-in in LR and spacious kitchen. The upstairs works great as a master suite w/attached bath. or as a bonus/playroom. Lovely backyard with pool! Only $185,000.

Call Linda Sowell, Sowell & Company Realtors. 901-278-4380.

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Apply in person ONLY AT THE LOCATION YOU WISH TO WORK AT 9:00 am to 11:00 am and from 2:00 pm to 4:00 pm.

1999 madison ave.

Seeks Mature, Motivated, Reliable, Salesperson. Computer skills. $9 hrly+ depends on exp’d. Work a retail schedule as reqd. Adapt quickly to fast paced environment.

apply in Person: Mon-thur, 11:am-5:00pm. or email: wizxtoo@bellshouth.net

NOW HIRING SALES REP/ACCOUNT REP Contemporary Media Inc., locally owned and operated publisher of Memphis magazine, The Memphis Flyer, Memphis Parent, and Inside Memphis Business is looking for a full-time salesperson to join our team. Must have proven sales experience, excellent communication skills (both written and oral) and be a self-starter.

Candidate must be highly organized and able to thrive in a high volume, fast-paced and teamoriented environment. Knowledge of the local market a plus.

Preferred Qualifications: · Print, digital, event sponsorship, and mobile selling experience · High-level cold calling · Negotiation skills · High competency in MS Office or Google Drive products · Ability to communicate effectively to a large group Compensation package commensurate with experience, plus paid company benefits

Please send cover letter and resume to: HR@contemporary-media.com No phone calls please.

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PAID IN ADVANCE! Make $1000 a week. Mailing Brochures from home. Helping home workers since 2001. Genuine Opportunity. No experience required.

Start immediately. MailingHelp.com (AAN CAN)

UPSCALE WINE & SPIRITS Store: Kirby Wines & Liquor is currently seeking responsible, hard working applicants for Cashier & Stocking positions. Experience preferred but not required. Must be dependable & have a flexible schedule. 756-1993

REAL ESTATE

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

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REAL ESTATE

901 575 9400 classifieds@memphisflyer.com DOWNTOWN LOFT/ CONDO HISTORIC CLARIDGE HOUSE Condominiums at 109 N. Main: Studio, $650/mo; 2BR/2BA, $1150/mo; 2BR/2BA, $1250.

Indoor pool, work out room, roof top patio. Call (901) 331-3807.

THE WASHBURN Ideal Location. Stunning Spaces. One of a Kind. 60 S. Main St. Memphis TN. 901.527.0244 thewashburn.com

MIDTOWN APT 199 S. MCLEAN 2BR/1BA, $1025/mo.Call MTC (901) 756-4469 CENTRAL GARDENS 2BR/1BA, hdwd floors, ceiling fans, french doors, all appls incl. W/D, 9ft ceil, crown molding, off str pking. $720/mo. Also 1BR, $610/mo.

833-6483.

MIDTOWN APARTMENT Large 1BR, living room, kitchen, CH/A, off-street parking. Close to grocery, restaurant, bus. 901.356.9794 MIDTOWN APARTMENTS Midtown - Mayflower Apts 35 N. McLean - 1BR, appl, w/air, HW floors, patio $675 Midtown - Union Place Apts 2240 Union - 1 & 2BR, appl, C/H&A $405 - $510 Call 272-9028. Free list @ lecorealty.com. Leco Realty, Inc. MIDTOWN APTS FOR RENT Large 1 Br. Midtown Apt. Off Overton Square. Water incl. $550. Huge 3Br. 2 Bth. Apt. Midtown area. 1 mile from Overton Park. Water/gas incl, gated, hardwood floors, CH/A, onsite laundry $695. 2Br. Apt. $525-$575.

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901-405-5755 or 901-236-4629 NICE ROOMS FOR RENT S. Pkwy & Wilson. Utilities and Cable included. Fridge in your room. Cooking and free laundry privileges. Some locations w/sec. sys. Starting at $435/ mo. + dep. 901.922.9089

BUY, SELL, TRADE

ARE YOU IN BIG trouble with the IRS? Stop wage & bank levies, liens & audits, unfiled tax returns, payroll issues, & resolve tax debt FAST. Call 844-753-1317 (AAN CAN) FASHION REWIND Online Consignment & Resale.stores. ebay.com/fashionrewind KING OF THE WORLD MOVERS Winter Special On Local Moves! $90 per hr +$50 service fee. (2hr minimum). Long Distance moving also available. A+ BBB rating. Call for Info 901.299.9566

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Premier retailers, chic Conveniently located: Easyfresh access to premier retailers, chic eateries, eateries, markets & fresh markets & live entertainment venues that are just minutes away. live entertainment venues • Townhouse, garden or high-rise units areto trolley justlineminutes away!

• Adjacent • Located near historic Beale Street and AutoZone Park • BeautifulCall park-like setting today!

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Rosecrest Apartments A Northland Community

888.589.1982

ROOMS FOR RENT For rent In Midtown Area: Furnished rooms ideal for student or retirees.

Includes living/dining room. Off street parking. Close to stores, restaurants & bus. 356.9794

U OF M HOMES FOR RENT 1280 CAROLYN DR. 3BR/1.5BA, $895/mo. Call MTC (901) 756-4469

+ Controlled access building + Beautiful historic Midtown location + Community Lounge and Business Center + Inviting Swimming Pool + 24 hour fitness center + 24 hour laundry facility + Balconies + Fully equipped kitchens + Huge closets + Recycling center

HOMES FOR RENT Park / Highland 3567 Carrington 2BR, Den, C/Heat, carpet $495 3480 Hadley - 3BR, C/Heat $565 3192 Carrington - 3BR w/large den, C/Heat $605 U of M - Sherwood Forrest 1079 Will Scarlet - 2BR/1BA, den, HW floors, C/H&A $775 Free list @ lecorealty.com or come in, or call 272-9028. Leco Realty, 3707 Macon Rd.

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4701 Summer Ave • 901.842.0805

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The

Washburn

IDEAL LOCATION. STUNNING SPACES. ONE OF A KIND. 44

SERVICES

ROOMS FOR RENT Clean, furnished, CH/A, cable, utilities, WD included. I-240/Whitten area. $110/wk. Owner/Agent 901.461.4758

December 10-16, 2015

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APARTMENTS

Midtown – Mayflower Apts 35 N. McLean – 1BR, appl, w/air, HW floors, patio $675 Midtown – Union Place Apts 2240 Union –1 & 2BR, appl, C/H&A $405- $510 Many More to Choose From – Section 8 OK

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TH E LAST WO R D by Tim Sampson

Bah!!

m e m p h i s f l y e r. c o m

I am so filled with holiday spirit and good cheer I could just explode. I so love the Christmas holidays. I particularly love shopping malls and big-box stores. I love the thought of Black Friday and Cyber Monday and all of the other opportunities to get great deals on things that neither I nor anyone else really needs. But it’s the game that counts. It’s that thrill of putting down the turkey drumstick and racing immediately after Thanksgiving dinner to one of the malls or big stores to shop. Camping out for a day or two in the parking lot of said retailers? Even better. I LOVE that! I love the lines of people and the stampedes that take place when they blow the horn to let shoppers know that it’s time to fight each other for the newest Xbox or Star Wars-themed merchandise of varying kinds. It is so thrilling and heartwarming.

Oh, and I just can’t get enough of Christmas music and television commercials. I live for that. I love the sounds of bells jingling and crooners crooning and whistling the holiday classics. It’s just so joyous.

It’s downright rapturous. Oh, and Christmas movies. God, I live for those too. Especially new ones that blend humor and drama and romance and cute dogs and lots of holiday whimsy. I am nothing less than a big sucker for Christmas movies with lots of holiday whimsy. Can’t get enough of that.

The best type of holiday movie whimsy to me is when older, divorced men and women find unexpected love during the holidays and their families meet and there’s a lot of gosh darn, good old holiday merriment with a couple of the family members being a little eccentric and the cute dog eats the turkey or the ham from the holiday table. Hollywood could crank out a million of those every Christmas, and it still wouldn’t be enough for me.

Oh, and the Christmas DECORATIONS. This is perhaps the best aspect of all during the 12 beautiful days of Christmas. I’m not talking here about just lights, either. Sure, Christmas lights are more than awesome. When I drive by really big houses in really nice neighborhoods and the lovely new homes are completely covered in blinking lights and there’s a Santa and his sleigh and reindeer in light on the roof, I just get a warm feeling all inside me. It makes me so happy to see a display like that because you know someone had to put a lot of thought and work into creating something that majestically gorgeous.

I also like the vignette decorations, like the nativity scene with the baby Jesus and Joseph and Mary and the camels and the manger and all that. It’s so cheerful and nostalgic and wonderful. It just makes me want to sit around a warm fire with the people I love, drinking eggnog and sharing memories from Christmases past. Like the time Uncle Buddy got out of prison just in time to celebrate Christmas with his family — well, the members of the family who lived in the county into which he was released after doing time for aggravated assault because he was still on parole and couldn’t leave that county. It didn’t really matter though, because most of the whores he hung around with all lived in the county, too, and they had plenty of drug-dealer connections without having to steal another car and go to a different county to get the Christmas crystal meth. There were plenty of local convenience stores to rob to get the cash to pay the guy at the meth lab.

And Uncle Buddy would tell us all sorts of wonderful stories about celebrating Christmas in the state penitentiary with all of his Aryan brothers and how he was always married in prison to the man with the most cigarettes. And since it was just as easy to get drugs in prison as it was on the outside, if not easier, he and the brotherhood never had to worry much about spending Christmas without heroin. They could just attack and gangbang any of the drug dealers in there and get their drugs and celebrate the night away.

Of course, it was harder for them to get the Christmas lights and decorations, since they didn’t carry those in the prison commissary. They had to bribe the guards to bring those in under the cover of night. Well, they didn’t so much bribe them as they did threaten them with having associates on the outside murder their children on Christmas day if they didn’t get them the lights and decorations so they could spend Christmas Eve smoking crack in their cells and then making fake reindeer antlers to wear to the chow hall.

I don’t know why those stories warm my heart so during the holiday season but they really, really do. In fact, I feel like going Christmas shopping right now and getting what I heard on the news the other day is the most popular gift this year: an assault rifle. They’re on sale, you can get them at the gun shows without a background check, and everybody needs one. What’s the downside to that? So Merry Christmas, you hear?

THE LAST WORD

MIRIAM DOERR | DREAMSTIME.COM

In which the author confirms he is a Grinch.

47

MURPHY’S

MINGLEWOOD HALL

Pool Table • Darts • WI‑FI • Digital Jukebox

JUST ANNOUNCED: Sister Hazel [2/26] Elle King [4/21]

Visit our website for live music listings or check the AfterDark section of this Memphis Flyer KITCHEN OPEN LATE, OPEN FOR LUNCH! 1589 Madison • 726‑4193 www.murphysmemphis.com

YOUNGAVENUEDELI.COM 2119 Young Ave • 278‑0034

12/9: $3 Pint Night!

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12/26: Devil Train Kitchen Open Late! Now Delivering All Day! 278-0034 (limited delivery area)

GONER RECORDS New/ Used LPs, 45s & CDs. We Buy Records!

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Coco & Lola’s

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Midtown Salon Space

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DOWNTOWN VAPE SHOP 111 S. Court Ave. 901.517.6451 Next Door To Blue Plate Cafe’ www.GetFreeEjuice.com

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THE FIXERS An Association of Attorneys Let Us Handle It!

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BUCCANEER LOUNGE since 1967 12/9: Platinum Boys, Liquid Teens 12/10: Detective Bureau 12/11: Joe Sheike & The Shaman 12/12: Other Stories, Warm, Early Christmas Jam w/ Cosmic Hate Destroyer from 6‑9pm 12/13: Gringos & Boldgerz 12/14: Devil Train 12/15: Dave Cousar

1368 MONROE • 278‑0909

I Buy Old Windup Phonographs & Records

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Club 152 Presents

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1884 LOUNGE

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ROCKHOUSE LIVE EAT. DRINK. ROCK!

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TUT‑UNCOMMON ANTIQUES 421 N. Watkins St. 278‑8965 December 11‑13 ‑ 50% OFF all EARRINGS 1500 sq. ft. of Vintage & Antique Jewelry. Retro Furniture and Accessories. Original Paintings, Sculpture, Pottery, Art & Antiques. We are the only store in the Mid‑South that replaces stones in costume jewelry.

DACH ORIENTAL IMPORTS Largest Martial Arts Supplier Since 1979

Kung Fu DVD’s $10.00 www.dach.us • 4491 Summer • 901.685.3224 Tues – Sat 11:00 – 6:00

“MEANWHILE IN MEMPHIS: The Sound Of A Revolution” Documentary DVD’s! A great gift for all Memphis music lovers. Now available at brokenstringmemphis.com & at Memphis Music store (149 Beale), Shangri‑La Records, & Goner Records.

SOA PRESENTS: “Rock The World Tour”. net

at The PLEXX “Home Of The Blues” Producer S O A “Sounds Of Alfred”BLUES JAZZ, THE PLEXX, 380 E H Crump A Promotion See Web ‑ for Info and advance tickets or call 901‑744‑2225 FRIDAYS 9 pm, see iTunes “SOA Experience” $15, BYOB, Hit Songs: “America” “Bluesmobile” “Reindeer Christmas”. Security & Parking.

Sponsor - Dr A R Brown, SMILES.

Tin Roof Memphis

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The Memphis Flyer SHOP LOCAL HOLIDAY 2015 SPECIAL Call 575.9425 for details

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