Why do we make fun of women with similar interests? Let the Girls Live

Words by Connie McCaul

A fter a few years of being an expat gal in Amsterdam, I have finally made the next step towards integration which is, (cue applause) – understanding Dutch memes!

And more specifically the Amsterdam meme pages making fun of the ‘Anne-Fleurs’ and the ‘Marie Claires’. These meme pages live on Instagram and have many loyal followers, it has even become a trend on TikTok to record young women who fit the stereotype, unbeknownst to them, and share it for the world to see.

The stereotype of the ‘Marie Claire’ consists of mini shoulder bags, claw hair clips, oversized blazers, and cowboy boots. I have not yet identified the difference between a ‘Marie Claire’ and an ‘Anne Fleur’ but I assure you my research shall continue as I fall deeper into Dutch culture.

I have to admit that I was highly enthralled with the extensive starter pack posts and detailed descriptions, all the way down to associated brand logos – but eventually, it got me thinking; this shame and ridicule of women who follow trends seems to be cross-cultural and perhaps even a form of internalized misogyny.

Let’s go back to the term ‘basic b*tch’. Do people still use that? It must be the most well-known phrase associated with women who dress alike and enjoy similar things.

According to Urban Dictionary: “She engages in typical, unoriginal behaviors, modes of dress, speech, and likes. She is tragically/laughably unaware of her utter lack of specialness and intrigue. She believes herself to be unique, fly, amazing, and a complete catch, when really, she is boring, painfully normal, and par.”

…ouch

Blatantly written by an incel, yet there’s nothing like an Urban Dictionary description to humble us all.

However, this highlights the mean and misogynist undertones of labeling women as ‘basic’, because it intrinsically labels us as unworthy.

Unworthy of what you ask? Respect, love, or even attention.

‘Basic’ goes hand in hand with trends, and to me, trends are also a display of collective enjoyment, especially in fashion and media.

So how, when millions are invested in the promotion of trendy items, do we deem women unoriginal and devoid of personality for partaking in such trends?

What is interesting to point out, is that the same does not usually apply to typically masculine areas of interest. We can all agree that there’s a different attitude towards men who cry at football games and women who cry at concerts. Are men and boys ever labelled as ‘basic’ for supporting a popular football team, or fanboying over a famous video game? Not likely.

Somewhere along in the development of modern society, we have created this double standard and it causes women and girls to be ridiculed for our collective enjoyment of things and it goes so far that we shame each other for it too.

This is where we can begin to bend the status quo a little – by being kinder and more conscious of each other.

The overlying issue with judging people for what they choose to wear, buy, eat, and watch – is that we are reducing their entire personality to a few shallow categories.

When it comes down to it, as trends evolve and rapidly change, each and every one of us ( God forbid) will most likely enjoy something mainstream. So evidently, we’re all ‘basic’ anyways.

Lastly, we can recognize the joy in having shared interests, choosing to see our similarities as an opening for connection instead.