I Only Ever Told You and the Moon Mazie Solarz-Patel

I Only Ever Told You and The Moon

I only ever told you and the moon, How much light his absence brought, How I hate the marks His words made on my skin, And how he never taught, Me How to truly love. Did you know he’s gone? Their long fingers dragged him to the place where he’ll sit, ‘Til the final dawn,

In fifteen months, He’ll come home, deteriorated, At-home life back to beyond R-rated. Why did he do it? Why did he go? It wasn’t his fault, But he should have known. Maybe I’m selfish, Just like they say, But it doesn’t change the fact, He was never there to stay. When he left I felt free again, Lighter in a way, But her, She was full of dismay. The weights and the chains that tugged down my mind, Were finally lifted, But thrown back at me in time.

I only ever told you and the moon, How I don’t think I love him, Which is a terrifyingly real feeling. After all, He’s who made my tears brim,

And helped me construct the walls surrounding my heart, Made me think no one loves me. Emotion is a foreign language, To ignorant/ beings who aren’t free.

On Tik Tok “daddy issues” are romanticized, Made to be a joke, But real life is messy and hard, Tugging you down like a rope. When you always feel like you’re on guard, It seems there is no hope.

I only ever told you and the moon, That I cried only once, And not for him, But for What could have been. It was the anger bubbling up and over me, A helpless pot of pain. The tears trailed droplets of moonlight as they trickled, Tasting of ocean and rain. That night your soul glowed through the pain, Glowed in the dark, Glowed in the rain.

You’re a constant reminder, That despite everything, We must admit there will be music. Because even when The world ends, We will still be singing.

Mazie Solarz-Patel, Grade 8 South View Middle School, Edina Teaching Artist, Frank Sentwali