March 2020 Fifty Plus Advocate Eastern Edition by Community Advocate

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Eastern Edition | Vol. 46 | No. 3 | March 2020

Jeff’s Place offers a ‘home’ to grieve and heal

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Ruth

POINTER

The pop music icon reflects on her life in the spotlight… the highs, the lows and the lessons learned along the way. Story on page 20

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AARP Community Challenge Grant Program now accepting 2020 applications By Mike Festa, State Director AARP Massachusetts

W In a Livable Community, people of all ages can make their neighborhood, town or city a lifelong home.

MASSACHUSETTS Visit aarp.org/livable to learn how age-friendly, livable communities benefit people and places. AARP Massachusetts 1-866-448-3621 | maaarp@aarp.org Connect with us: @aarpma | AARPMA

e know that it takes time to build great communities. But, we also believe that quick action can spark longer-term progress. AARP launched the AARP Community Challenge in 2017 to fund projects that build momentum to improve livability for all. We are excited to announce the program is back in 2020 for its fourth year and is currently accepting applications through the April 1 deadline. The Community Challenge is open to 501(c)(3), 501(c)(4) and 501(c)(6) nonprofits and government entities. Other types of organizations will be considered on a case-by-case basis. Grants can range from several hundred dollars for small, short-term activiMike Festa ties to several thousand or tens of thousands for larger projects. The program will accept applications for projects in the following categories: The program funds • *New in 2020* Increase civic engagement with innovative quick-action projects and tangible projects that bring that help make residents and local leaders together to address challenges and communities better for facilitate a greater sense of comall ages; Application munity inclusion and diversity; • Create vibrant public places deadline is April 1, 2020. through permanent or temporary solutions that activate open spaces, improve parks and enhance access to amenities; • Deliver a range of transportation and mobility options through permanent or temporary solutions that increase walkability, bikeability, wayfinding, access to transportation options and roadway improvements; • Support the availability of a range of housing through permanent or temporary solutions that increase accessible and affordable housing options; • Demonstrate the tangible value of “Smart Cities” by developing and implementing innovative programs that engage residents in accessing, understanding and using data and participating in decision-making to increase quality of life for all; and • Other innovative projects to improve the community. Since 2017, the AARP Community Challenge has funded 376 projects nationwide, including right here in Massachusetts. All eligible organizations are encouraged to apply. We have seen tangible results from the AARP Community Challenge grant program supporting communities in Massachusetts as they make quick changes and inspire long-term progress. Here are the 2019 AARP Community Challenge winners: • The town of Belchertown was granted $10,000 to install wayfinding signage and a kiosk with information in braille for the Lake Wallace Sensory Trail. • The city of Chelsea was awarded $8,750 for the Division Street Alley Project to create a safe corridor to connect pedestrians and cyclists to the library, senior center, a bus stop, and a grocery store. • The city of Boston was granted $10,000 to install three to five benches along Main Streets in 20 neighborhoods. • Beyond the Walls, Inc. of Lynn was granted $16,000 for the installation of four parklets and public art installations for their annual art festival. The application deadline for 2020 AARP Community Challenge grants is Wednesday, April 1, 2020, 11:59 p.m. ET. All projects must be completed by Monday, November 9, 2020. For more information or to apply, visit AARP.org/CommunityChallenge. Mike Festa is the state director for AARP Massachusetts. Archives of articles from previous issues can be read at www.fiftyplusadvocate.com.

Ednah Pruce

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Breaking barriors while advocating for others By Serena Howlett Contributing Writer QUINCY - In the spring of 1956 a new member of the US Air Force Nurse Corps was ordered to report for basic training in Montgomery, Ala. The young nurse, named Edna, traveled by train from Wilmington, Del. to Montgomery. A doctor on the train, also headed to the Air Force base, offered to carry her bags. Together, they entered the station. Upon setting foot in the busy passenger waiting room, all chatter and activity ended abruptly. The doctor was white; the nurse was black. A few minutes later taxi drivers ignored the doctor as he stood on the curb with the nurse and their bags. Reentering the station to call the base for transportation, the doctor encountered a white policeman, who threatened him with arrest and worse, if he came back. Welcome to the Deep South. Ednah Pruce (née Wilson) was not taken aback by the treatment she received at the train station. She had grown up in an economically comfortable, education-oriented family. In her childhood she and her parents had lived in a large house owned by her grandparents. But her hometown of Wilmington was racially segregated: “segregated housing, segregated schools, segregated lunch counters, segregated movies,” she recalled. On the basis of race, she had been rejected from all nursing schools in the state of Delaware. Undaunted, she earned a nursing diploma at the highly-respected Freedman Hospital School of Nursing at Howard University. Montgomery was a life-changing experience. Although Pruce lived in the Air Force dormitory for nurses, she witnessed the civil rights movement with her own eyes and ears. On the first day of December in the previous year, Rosa Parks, a seamstress, refused to stand up when the white bus driver ordered her to give her seat to a white passenger. Parks’

Ednah Pruce

arrest sparked the Montgomery Bus Boycott, which lasted for 381 days — until the U.S. Supreme Court declared segregated transit unconstitutional. On Thursday evenings, while the bus boycott was in progress, Pruce heard the young Martin Luther King, Jr. exhort his listeners to protest segregation (“to be saved from that patience that makes us patient with anything less than freedom and justice.”). Pruce’s front row seat at this turning point in the history of civil rights has informed her work to this day. When the Air Force stationed Pruce in the UK, another transformative event took place. This time it was highly personal. Observing Pruce at a Baháʼí conference at Oxford University, a divinity student fell in love. Not finding her when the conference ended, he made a frantic search and finally caught up with her as she left a Woolworth store. After showing her the sights, he invited her to his room for tea. Their subsequent interracial engagement caught media attention and the couple received over 350 letters from all over Commonwealth and America. They were married on Christmas Eve 1960. While still in England Pruce

had written to Massachusetts General Hospital about her plans to return to the United States. MGH invited her for an interview. In 1964 she became the first black nurse to work in the MGH Outpatient Clinics. After many years of nursing Pruce was ready for a change and returned to college. She earned a bachelor degree in health education in 1967 and a master’s degree in Counseling Psychology in 1968, both at Boston University. Over the following decades, Pruce filled many roles. Between 1979 and 1995, she held the position of Associate Dean of Students at Northeastern University. She became president of the first organized YWCA. She was appointed to the Board of Trustees at Bunker Hill Community College. She served as president of Boston Senior Home Care and she is currently a member of the Ethos Board of Directors.

Pruce has inspired many to take action and such actions have improved the lives of many people. As president of the Massachusetts Senior Action Council (MSAC), her most recent accomplishment is inclusion of a measure to expand access to the federal Medicare Savings Plan in the 2020 budget. The expanded program, which reduces the cost of premiums and prescription drugs, will cover seniors with incomes up to 165 percent of the poverty level. Under Pruce’s leadership, MSAC members will continue to advocate for the program to cover a greater number of low-income seniors. In 2019 State Representative Dan Cullinane nominated Pruce for the Massachusetts Status of Women’s Unsung Heroine award. Pruce continues to exemplify the words of Rosa Parks, “Each person must live their life as a model for others”.

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Attorney presents his case for changing career to comedian By Ed Karvoski Jr. Culture Editor WAKEFIELD – The resume of a particular former Essex County assistant district attorney and criminal defense trial attorney also includes his credits for stand-up comedian, five-time author and co-star of the 2011 Showtime movie “The Godfathers of Comedy.” No longer presenting cases in courts, Paul D’Angelo is now headlining at comedy clubs and has opened for over 60 internationally-acclaimed entertainers. He pursued interests other than performing while attending Wakefield High School and later Suffolk University Law School, graduating with a Juris Doctor degree in 1982. The following year, he accepted a job as assistant district attorney. His stage debut of sorts was delivering a comical speech at a buddy’s bachelor party. “I loved the whole dynamic of performing in front of people and getting an immediate reaction,” he recalled. “I really hadn’t thought of

actually performing onstage.” Considering a try at performing onstage, he figured the DA wouldn’t allow him to moonlight at comedy clubs. He decided to perform open mic nights by the pseudonym Paul D’Angelo and continue working days by his birth name, Paul Murphy. He applied his law experience to experimenting onstage. “I wasn’t worried about my stage presence because I had done probably 100 trials by then in front of a judge and jury,” he explained. “When you’ve been admonished by a judge in front of a crowded courtroom, a heckler isn’t going to bother you.” Venturing into the comedy scene got his mother’s backhanded approval. “I’ll never forget my mother’s words of encouragement when I first performed comedy: ‘I’m glad you got that out of your system!’” he recollected. “After doing only about a dozen open mics, all of a sudden I was headlining shows four to seven nights a week while holding down my job at the DA’s office.”

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Paul D’Angelo

D’Angelo also began working as an opening act. Among the entertainers with whom he shared stages are The Beach Boys, Tony Bennett, Ray Charles, Chicago, Aretha Franklin, Tom Jones, Jerry Lew Lewis, Lyle Lovett, Dennis Miller, The Righteous Brothers, Joan Rivers and The Temptations. As an especially memorable gig, he cites opening for comic legend George Carlin in 1989 at Hampton Beach’s Club Casino (now known as Casino Ballroom). After D’Angelo invited friends to the much-anticipated show, he learned that Carlin’s manager wanted to replace him with the headliner’s usual opener. The venue’s owner convinced Carlin’s manager to give D’Angelo five minutes to perform. “When I got to the end of five

minutes, they kept telling me to stretch,” D’Angelo recounted. “I ended up doing 25 minutes, getting a standing ovation and signing autographs.” Afterward backstage, he joined his friends including Wally, the owner of a limo service in which D’Angelo invested when financial assistance was needed. “Wally grinned and said, ‘I don’t know what happened, Paul; I picked up George at the airport and we must have got lost,’” D’Angelo relayed. “That’s when I realized that Wally ‘got lost’ on purpose to give me more time onstage.” Named Boston’s Best Comedian in 1994 and 1995 by Boston Magazine, D’Angelo was also recognized as a finalist in several national comedy competitions. He left his job at

www.fiftyplusadvocate.com + March 2020 + fiftyplus advocate the DA’s office in 1994 and became a criminal defense trial attorney. “I was doing good things for bad people,” he said. “I eventually quit and moved to Los Angeles.” While in L.A. from 1996 to 2002, he wrote diaries to vent his aversion for Tinseltown. Now back in his hometown of Wakefield, D’Angelo continues to incorporate some of the writings into his act as well as his most recently released three of five books, a series titled “L.A. Miserables.” “Living in L.A. was frustrating, so writing was cathartic for me,” he noted. “Comedy comes from tension, conflict and awkward situations. The fact that I hated L.A. so much was actually beneficial because it lent itself to writing funny material.” For more information about Paul D’Angelo, visit pdangelo. com and facebook.com/comedianpauldangelo.

Gathered are “The Godfathers of Comedy” cast and crew members (l to r) Paul D’Angelo, comedian; John Caponera, comedian; Ron Onesti, producer; Rocky LaPorte, producer; Willie Fratto, comedian; and Frank Santorelli, comedian. (Not pictured is Rick D’Elia, comedian.)

I’ll never forget my mother’s words of encouragement when I first performed comedy: ‘I’m glad you got that out of your system!’ Paul D’Angelo at Giggles Comedy Club in Saugus

~ Paul D’Angelo

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Local men form Worcester County Senior Golfers traveling club By Brett Peruzzi Contributing Writer

to keep our club manageable and continue having fun, quality events,” Condelli added. The club gives members an opportunity to REGION - For decades golf has been a popular play together at a discount at premium courses pastime for seniors, but Dick Lisi of Sturbridge in the area. Foursomes, threesomes, twosomes, and Joe Condelli of Auburn see it as not only a and singles are all welcome. All levels of golfers sport but a social opportunity as well. That’s why are encouraged to join. they and Lisi’s brother Tom formed the Worcester Past club events have been held at venues County Senior Golf Club for both men and womlike Green Hill Golf Course in Worcester, Herien over age 60. tage Country Club in Charlton, Blackstone Na“Dick Lisi and I, with Tom Lisi as a consultant, tional Golf Club in Sutton, Cyprian Keyes Golf formed the club in November 2018,” recalled ConClub in Boylston, and Shining Rock Golf Club delli. “During the 2018 season, Dick and I played in Northbridge. with a similar traveling golf group in western While the club does not have dues, it asks Massachusetts, and we felt that the same type of that members donate $25 to the Shriners Hosclub could be a fun experience for central Massapitals for Children in Springfield. chusetts seniors.” “We wanted to contribute to a cause that Dick Lisi and Joe Condelli The club travels to play 18 holes at a different helped families and have heard of many casgolf course in central Massachusetts one Thurses where children were cared for regardless of day a month from May to October. family insurance or income,” observed Condelli. “We try to negotiate the best deal possible with each course,” said Dick Lisi. Lisi takes great satisfaction from the community of golfing seniors he and “Our greens fees are in the range of $35 to $50 for 18 holes and a cart. We also have Condelli have created. “I really enjoy showing up at a golf course on our event each of our golfers contribute $5 for prizes, which include prizes for the three days and seeing so many of our members talking, laughing, and ready to enplayers closest to the holes on all par threes. We also have chipping and putting joy a great day of golf. It’s great putting faces to the names of new members contests for prizes.” that we have only known previously via e-mail,” he said. Lisi stressed the enjoyable, inclusive nature of the events over a winner-take“Our club is both a golf and social club,” Lisi affirmed. “New friendships all competition. “Usually we give out 18 to 20 prizes at each event. Our idea is to continue to develop just as mine and Joe’s did when we met at the western have a good number of members go home a happy winner,” he said. Massachusetts golf group in 2018. We would like to see member carpooling “Our first golf event took place in May 2019 with 34 players,” he explained. evolve as friendships solidify.” “We have grown to 50 to 55 players per event, and we are still growing, through For more information, call Lisi at 508-410-1332 or e-mail wcsgolf@gmail. word of mouth and media coverage.” com. You can also visit the club’s Facebook page at https://www.facebook. “We want to continue to recruit new members and at the same time we want com/groups/2073253692767834.

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Helping you navigate your finances as you plan for retirement By Bonnie Adams Managing Editor MARLBOROUGH – Last December the U.S. Congress passed, and President Donald Trump signed, the SECURE Act [Setting Every Community Up for Retirement Enhancement Act of 2019]. “It was the most consequential retirement-related legislation since the passage of the Pension Protection Act of 2006,” said Joseph McManus, a Financial Planner with Prudential. The SECURE Act aims to significantly improve the retirement readiness of millions of Americans by making significant changes to the current retirement planning system. Some of its provisions will make it easier for small business owners to set up retirement plans while also allowing more Americans, specifically part-time workers, to be eligible for retirement plans. The Act will also push back the age at which retirement plan participants need to take required

Joseph McManus

minimum distributions (RMDs), from 70½ to 72, and will allow traditional IRA owners to keep making contributions indefinitely. While this Act is significant in that it can help businesses and employees plan for a secure future, it is, like most legislation, complicated. Financial Planners like McManus, who is well versed in re-

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As a Financial Planner, Joseph McManus assists clients at each step along the roadmap to retirement. He has earned the RICP (retirement income certified professional) designation. As such, he is uniquely qualified to help individuals and/or couples with their investment strategies, analyzing their projected expenses and challenges that they may encounter. Small businesses also rely on his advisory services for their planning. Whether you are discussing new legislation such as the Secure Act or simply doing a strategy review to ensure that your financial plan still matches your existing goals, a financial planner can be a trusted advisor in navigating a constantly changing financial landscape. McManus’s office is located at 293 Boston Post Rd West, Suite 110, Marlborough. To contact him call 508-382-4904 or email Joseph.McManus@Prudential.com. Visit www. prudential.com/advisor/joseph-mcmanus for more information.

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tirement strategies, assist clients by staying up to date on legislation that impacts their financial lives and adjusting their strategies to maximize their income in retirement. “Progress brings new challenges,” noted McManus. “Many of our clients are focused on ensuring that they do not outlive their money. Others have specific goals that require more specialized solutions. And, of course, clients want to know how legislation like the SECURE Act will impact their financial planning.” According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the average age life expectancy for American males is 78.6 and for women, a bit higher at 81. While most do not retire at age 62, as previous generations did, most people will find that there are still many years of fun, travel, volunteering and living the life they choose, that is, if they have sufficiently prepared for their financial life after the regular weekly, work paycheck stops.

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Fifty Plus Advocate is published monthly, 12 times annually by Bagdon Advertising, 32 South Street, Westborough, MA 01581. Fifty Plus Advocate accepts no responsibility for unsolicited manuscripts or materials and does not return them to sender. Retractions for any inaccuracies will be printed when necessary. Unsolicited letters to the editor become the property of this newspaper and can be reprinted in part or in whole unless otherwise stated. Fifty Plus Advocate columnists writing under a byline are expressing their personal opinions and not necessarily those of the newspaper.

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Meet Lady Maria Chaffington, Jane Austen’s ‘friend’ By Jane Keller Gordon Assistant Editor

PHOTOS COURTRTESY OF DONNA CHAFF

HUDSON - Speaking in an English accent and dressed in a gown from the early 1800s, Lady Maria (pronounced Mariah) Chaffington loves to talk about growing up with her close friend Jane Austen. Chaffington, a proficient pianist, fondly remembers Jane’s life and enjoys playing Jane’s music. The fact is — Chaffington has outlived her friend by more than two centuries. She is the creation of Donna Maria Chaff, a retired music teacher and longtime Hudson resident. Chaff has found her muse. In real life, she can be seen wearing earring with quotes from Mr. Darcy of Pride and Prejudice, a scarf imprinted with Austen’s music, and a charm bracelet that’s all about Austen. An accomplished organist and pianist, Chaff has taken a deep dive into learning about Austen’s life story, her books, and her music. When transformed from Chaff to Chaffington, she dresses in period gowns that she has purchased and sewn.

Music has always been center stage in Chaff’s life. The eldest of five siblings, she grew up in Lawrence, Mass. with her father, who was a professional pianist and organist, and her mother, who played the piano. Chaff studied both the piano and organ as a child. “My father used to say that I had the fingers of a pianist,” she recalled. She majored in music education at the University of Lowell, which is now UMass Lowell. “Being able to play the piano and sight read was a big advantage for me,” said Chaff. Her first teaching job was in Newburyport, followed by one in Nashua and a three-year stint at an American school in Athens. Chaff settled into a 27year run in Wellesley, teaching K-5 general music. “We worked on creative movement to the beat, reading music, singing folk songs, learning music from other cultures, and integrating with the rest of the curriculum,” she explained.

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Austen became her muse

PHOTO/JANE KELLER GORDON

Chaff’s devotion to Austen began 15 years ago when she took a continuing education seminar in the Teachers as Scholars program at Harvard University. “Dr. Marcia Fulsom from Wheelock College showed me how intriguing the language was and how interesting the characters were in Austen’s Pride and Prejudice,” said Chaff. Next Chaff joined the Jane Austen Society and attended some lectures in Boston. She read and re-read Austen’s six published novels. Her connection to Austen goes beyond her fascinations with Austen’s characters – including Elizabeth Bennett and Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice. Austen was an accomplished pianist herself, and piano music was featured in many of her novels. Chaff’s bond to Austen’s music was deepened when she discovered the Austen Family Music Books, which was published online by the University of Southampton. Donna Chaff Chaff was fascinated by the scans of 12 volumes, six of which belonged to Austen. “There is period music from 1760 to 1850. There were sonatas and opera transcriptions as well as songs, duets for violin and piano, and country dance songs,” she said. “There’s little bit of Mozart, Handel and Haydn, but none of the composers were people who we would find famous.” Chaff quickly mastered Austen’s music. The Jane Austen Tea at M.I.T.’s Endicott House, and Jane Austen Weekends at the Governor’s Inn in Hyde Park, Vt., have added to Chaff’s immersion in all things Austen. When Chaff retired from teaching in 2016, she and her six published novels husband, Bob Specian, also a music teacher, travelled ense and ensibility to Austen’s U.K. home, Chawton ride and rejudice Cottage. Chaff was able to play a Clementi Pianoforte ansfield ark from 1815, which is the type of inmma strument on which Austen played. orthanger bbey Chaff’s creation, Lady Maria Chaffington, made ersuasion her debut on Sep*posthumous tember 14, 2016 at the Marlborough Public Library. She returned in 2017 at the Acton Senior Center, and in 2019 at 19 Carter, a community center in Berlin. “My performances include props for selfies with Maria,” Chaff noted. Austen herself once noted, “Without music, life would be blank to me.” “Through [her] music, I’ve been able to ensure that more people read more Jane,” said Chaff. For more information about Jane Austen’s music, visit chaffmusic.weebly.com. If you would like to invite Lady Maria Chaffington to your organization, Chaff is eager to hear from you. She can be contacted at Chaffmusic@gmail.com.

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Jeff’s Place offers a ‘home’ to grieve and heal By Lauren Schiffman Contributing Writer

hen her brother, Jeff, died almost 40 years ago, Jenny Kaplan became a bereaved sibling. But, she said, “no one talked about it. It was not a very healthy way of grieving. I grew up feeling like I was the only one in the world who had a family member die.” Today, families throughout MetroWest need not feel that they are alone in their grief. Kaplan established Jeff’s Place, the nonprofit grief support provider, 10 years ago after years of experience in, volunteering for and running other bereavement support programs. It ensures that participating families do not have to grieve alone.

Jeff’s Place originally served six families and has grown significantly to serve between 50 and 55 families from 38 communities at its home in Framingham. Services include peer support groups for children ages three to 19 and their caregivers who have experienced “a significant death loss.” Art, music, memory sharing and discussion are various ways for the children to express their grief, and programs geared to even younger children ages three to eight - utilize sand, art and play. Caregivers participate in group discussions while the children are in their groups; are supported through their grief; and educated on how to parent a child who is grieving. A warm, welcoming environment, Jeff’s Place is like home. It’s a The Scott family – Danny, Christy, Joan and Daniel

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place where people feel comfortable expressing themselves without fear of judgment. It’s a place where families gather to be among others who are grieving. And it’s a place where participants are treated as the experts on their own grief. Families can participate in programming for as long as they need it. A stepdown program is available for those ready to “graduate.” Rather than participating in groups twice per month, they participate monthly. One family that has benefitted from Jeff’s Place is the Scott family of Northborough. When their son, Danny, died by suicide in 2012, Joan and Dan Scott sought help for their then17-year-old daughter Christy. They were referred to Jeff’s Place. “We were in an adult group with people who had lost children,” Joan said, while Christy participated in a teen support group. They all found comfort in “making that connection with other families and having a place where everybody ‘gets it.’” Joan says that the groups were safe spaces. “There was nothing you could say that was too off the wall. People just understood. It was that feeling of connection,” too, that was critically important for Christy, because she

was surrounded by other children who had suddenly lost a sibling and were going through similar feelings and emotions. After two years, the Scotts “graduated” from the program and wanted to be there for others who had experienced sudden loss. Today, Dan serves as Treasurer on Jeff’s Place Board of Directors; Joan volunteers with children’s groups; and Christy volunteers as a facilitator for the sibling loss group. Joan says that it helps their healing. Part of Jeff’s Place’s success is due to its staffing and oversight; Jeff’s Place has an extensive intake process and employs one full-time and two -part-time clinicians; an intern; six contract clinicians who run support groups and “wonderful volunteer facilitators,” said Kaplan. While Kaplan added that the organization outgrew its space about three years ago, they didn’t want to move, “because this is our community.” However, a new home recently purchased at 281 Pleasant Street, Framingham, will enable Jeff’s Place to expand its services and double the number of group support rooms to eight. The move will take place this summer. To help support the purchase of the new home, and to honor ten years of Jeff’s Place and Kaplan’s tireless

www.fiftyplusadvocate.com + March 2020 + fiftyplus advocate

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The caring that Jeff’s Place has for every person in the program is just phenomenal. I think we’d be in a different place if it weren’t for Jeff’s Place.

efforts, a gala will be held on May 2, 2020 at the Weston Waltham Hotel. The event will feature a silent auction with prizes that include two first class airline tickets and a five-night trip to Cancun; tickets to the Nantucket Wine Festival; tickets to Boston’s professional sporting events; and more. To donate items for the auction, and to purchase gala tickets, visit www.jeffsplacemetrowest.org. “Grief is very isolating,” says Joan. “Jeff’s Place helps to break that isola-

~ Joan Scott

tion. “I feel so strongly about encouraging people to take advantage of this program. Often, people (who are grieving) feel that they can handle it themselves. (But) it’s just such a healing experience. It gives you that connection you don’t get in a lot of ways” when one suddenly loses a loved one. “The caring that Jeff’s Place has for every person in the program is just phenomenal. I think we’d be in a different place if it weren’t for Jeff’s Place,” Joan said.

Joan, Daniel and Christy at the Jeff’s Place Memory Walk held last October in Framingham

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Acclaimed writer advocates against ageism By Susan Gonsalves Contributing Writer SHARON - Ted Ludwiczak, a refugee from Poland survived the Nazis invasion and Russian occupation to settle in the U.S. and work as a contact lens grinder. In his 60s, without any experience, he was compelled to sculpt faces into a wall along the Hudson River, becoming an acclaimed artist. At 93, Harry Bernstein started writing about his life before World War I in northern England, the anti-Semitism he experienced and his sister’s forbidden romance with a Christian. His memoir was published when he was 96. Bruce Frankel highlighted these individuals and others like them in his award-winning, best seller “What Should I Do with the Rest of My Life?” published by Penquin, 2010. The author’s life is equally as compelling. Frankel has always been a storyteller – starting as an eight-yearold who published his own mimeographed five cent newspaper called “The Item.” “My claim to fame was an article about a boy who jumped off his dresser and landed with his teeth in the headboard,” Frankel recalled. The Miami Herald picked up the story of the budding journalist and “so began my career,” he said. Born in Hollywood, Florida he moved to Curacao in the West Indies as a boy, honing his writing skills composing letters to sports figures. Eventually, Frankel moved to Long Beach, New York where he graduated high school. After earning a bachelor’s degree in government from Franklin & Marshall College, he worked as a psychiatric aide, wrote poetry and launched what was to become an award-winning journalism career. Frankel has fond memories of his days as a local reporter in northern Westchester, finding satisfaction investigating topics such as a fire set by bullies at a senior group home. His reporting led to state legislative action. “I think the work I liked best was reporting that was local and made a difference,” Frankel said. His varied career took him to USA Today, where he covered major trials including John Gotti’s third,

Someone who views aging with fear and sees it as an inferior part of life is more likely to get ill and not recover.

Bruce Frankel

the Oklahoma bombing, and the first World Trade Center bombing in 1992. “That stayed with me,” Frankel said. “So many were predicting if we didn’t understand radical Islamic cells in the U.S. and the FBI didn’t coordinate, we were likely to see worse…And those predictions were fulfilled.” A cancer scare made him re-evaluate his life’s direction, steering him toward creative writing, but first he and another reporter were hired by People magazine to start an investigative unit. Although he expanded his skills over four years by composing comprehensive, long-form magazine pieces on subjects like hunger in America, the job was not for him. He quit. Frankel went on to co-author the best-selling “World War II: History’s Greatest Conflict” (Little, Brown), ghost write and edit several books for others and at age 51, enroll as a graduate student at Sarah Lawrence College, majoring in writing/ poetry. “Graduate school was like Alice in Wonderland, having amazing teachers and being in heaven discussing ideas, listening to young, crackling minds. I loved it,” Frankel said. Frankel heard from a former Time Inc. colleague, who was let go from his job at age 60. “Following a four glasses of water lunch,” Frankel said, they decided to team up to write stories about people who succeeded after 60. But they didn’t want to highlight individuals with prior wealth or achievement. “We wanted people who created success for the first time and did things that were significant, fulfilled an ambition and developed a path,”

Frankel explained. And, “What Should I Do with the Rest of My Life,” was the result. Today, Frankel is still spreading the message about the value of older people and fighting ageism as a frequent guest speaker. He is also co-president of The Life Planning Network, co-leader of its New England chapter and editor of its journal. The nonprofit organization is comprised of professionals from diverse fields who look at life holistically and help guide people to “optimize” the second half of their lives.

~ Bruce Frankel

“Someone who views aging with fear and sees it as an inferior part of life is more likely to get ill and not recover,” Frankel said. The older generation should instead be embraced and accommodated in the workforce, so they can pass on knowledge and wisdom, he said. Frankel is also chief content officer at BSLI Redstring, an online platform for community building with non-profits and businesses. He’s working on a project developing an online “village experience,” for the LGBT community of New York City.

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Shirley Moore Leading the way for wayward pups By Sandi Barrett Contributing Writer

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SUDBURY - Leading a successful nonprofit for over 20 years is a testament to love, dedication, and an ever present desire to make a difference. Shirley Moore’s career path was traditional. However, she found herself commuting into Boston for a high tech job that didn’t provide her any joy. The daily trip was emotionally draining and when the city skyline come into view each day, as a feeling of dread and sadness enveloped her, she knew this was not her destiny. During this time, Moore and her husband Dave Bernier volunteered at a shelter to give back to their community and serve the dogs they loved. Unbeknownst to them, they were preparing the way for their future. In 1999, they began a dog fostering program out of their home, giving birth to Save A Dog. The nonprofit humane society’s primary focus is rescuing and rehoming abandoned dogs. It works to educate about pet overpopulation and the need to “adopt” rather than “buy”. The society also works with humane society in the rural south, taking in groups of dogs from those regions and finding them forever homes in the New England area. While working full-time, Moore began taking in rescues, finding

qualified foster homes, and eventually a forever home for each dog. This time consuming side hustle required her to be available 24/7 to cover emergencies, general care, and meet-and-greets. Over the years, the Moores have fostered over 1,000 dogs in their own home. Holding down a full-time job, raising two children, wrangling volunteer foster parents, and fostering multiple dogs in her home left Moore little time for hobbies. “I love to garden. Every spring I’m gung ho about planting, but then I get too busy to take care of it,” she lamented. In 2008, Save A Dog moved into its permanent home at 604 Boston Post Road in Sudbury. The kennel was now Shirley’s full time gig. The dream of operating a kennel dedicated to rescuing unwanted dogs and helping them find their forever homes was a glorious reality. Moore, a staunch believer in holistic medicine, stumbled upon it by accident. She had a very sick foster whose treatment was going to be thousands of dollars. Desperate to find an alternative, she discovered the Teleosis Institute in Cambridge. “Homeopathy changed my life,” she said. In nursing the dog back to health, she became convinced the future care for people and their pets lies in the holistic path.

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www.fiftyplusadvocate.com + March 2020 + fiftyplus advocate

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Moore began taking in rescues, finding qualified foster homes, and eventually a forever home for each dog.

ic serv

ditionally, she will soon be celebrating her daughter Mindy and fiancee Jesse’s wedding. “Spending time with my grandchildren is my retirement plan,” she said. “My goal as I reach retirement age, is to pass the torch of the Executive Director to someone with the same vision and commitment. I’ll have to fib about how many hours a day it takes,” she said with a wink. Moore will continue to be a champion for wayward dogs. Not able to slow down, the Moores have opened Natural Care Kennels in Northborough as their retirement gig. Their leisure years will be filled with loving kennel guests, overseeing Save A Dog, and enjoying their grandchildren. For more information on Save a Dog, visit www.saveadog.org. or call 978-443-7282.

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Moore is committed to education and is continually learning about canine behavior, signals, and reactions. She runs an enrichment program with Mt. Ida College where interns assist at the shelter. She oversees “lunch and learns” for the students imparting years of knowledge to the next generation of canine caregivers. Save A Dog is currently running a Legacy Bricks Fundraiser. The bricks will line the front walkway commemorating four and two legged family members. Bricks are $150 and $300. The proceeds will be used to upgrade the kennel, a priority for Moore. This will allow showings to take place indoors and ease the flow during bad weather. Shirley’s life has always been family focused. Her son, Tommy and his wife Kaitlyn have blessed her with two granddaughters. Ad-

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Shuffleboard – Not only found on ship decks By G. Gregory Tooker State Ambassador, MA Senior Games TEWKSBURY - Cheryle and John Laffey are recently retired but full of energy and anxious to tackle new adventures in life. The active couple chose the sport of shuffleboard a years ago. Selection criteria included an opportunity to travel, injury avoidance and a chance to meet new friends. Shuffleboard is a game in which players use cues to push weighted discs, sending them gliding down a narrow wooden court, with the purpose of having them come to rest within a marked scoring area. It is commonly found in places where seniors enjoy recreational opportunities such as cruise ships, senior centers or retirement complexes. Neither Cheryle nor John shy away from a challenge. After a relatively short introduction to the game and virtually no measurable practice, they decided to travel to Utah and compete in the 2016

Huntsman World Games, an event that attracts some of the best senior athletes from throughout the world. The couple was pleasantly surprised when, despite their inexperience, they were welcomed and provided needed advice and assistance by the Games officials and fellow athletes. John and Cheryle did not place but they came away convinced they would have a good chance to medal in the future. In the following years, the husband and wife team continued to improve, qualifying for the National Senior Games in Birmingham, Ala. where they did not medal but performed very well. In 2018, they competed in both the Massachusetts and New Hampshire Senior Games, winning gold medals in both singles and doubles, qualifying them again for the National Senior Games in 2019 in Albuquerque, New Mexico where they won a bronze medal in doubles. Their seven children and 14 grandchildren cheer them on energetically. Cheryle and John serve as Cheryle and John Laffey

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Event Managers in Shuffleboard for the MA Senior Games and are actively supporting development of the game, especially at senior centers. The couple also teaches classes in Tewksbury. Shuffleboard is friendly to players at every level, including the physically challenged. John has also served for many years as an umpire for wheelchair softball competitions throughout the state. The Laffeys believe that seniors should seriously consider making the game of shuffleboard part of their active lifestyle. For a relative-

ly modest investment, your senior center can install a court, according to John and Cheryle. (They were able to convince Tewksbury to add two courts.) As they said, the sport is a good way to improve flexibility, eye-hand coordination and to make some new friends. If you are interested in learning more about the world of shuffleboard, contact Cheryle and John at meanswell@comcast.net.

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Regret The man who insists upon seeing with perfect clearness before he decides, never decides. Accept life, and you must accept regret. – Henri Frederic Amiel

By Marianne Delorey, Ph.D. Executive Director, Colony Retirement Homes

p until recently, my only true regret was that I did not go with my father to the vets the day he put our childhood dog down. I was not too distraught; I was being lazy. I may not have been much comfort to the dog, but it would have been nice to be with my father. I regret choosing to sleep in. Now, I am sad to report that I can add a regret to this list. My uncle just passed. He was the last of the three siblings and he had the most intact memory. When he died, I lost the opportunity learn more of my family’s history. I wasn’t being lazy or cavalier. I knew he was dying, but I thought I had time. Oddly, this regret is less strong than the first. Turns out, I am not alone. Researchers have found that when we have more options, regret is a stronger consequence of making choices. I did not actively choose to ignore my uncle, but we did not know he had so little time. I missed time with him, but it was neglect, not active choice, on my part. Research also indicates that regret is stronger in Western cultures where there is more individual choice in life. This made me wonder how regret plays out in the elderly. I see a lot of families with rifts between members and even more who just have lost touch. Maybe some of these connections can be reestablished, mended, and made whole, and in some cases, maybe these connections should remain broken forever. According to Bronnie Ware, an Australian blogger who worked in hospice care, the five most common regrets shared by people nearing death were: “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.” “I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.” “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.” “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.” “I wish that I had let myself be happier.” Regret does offer us helpful information about how we want to live our lives moving forward. I would be curious to hear from our readers how regret and choice interact in their later years. If you, like many, feel “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends,” then what is stopping you from reconnecting? Have some ties been cut on purpose? Do you regret making that choice? Were there people with whom you just lost touch? Do you regret not yet making the effort to reconnect? Can you let go of regrets that cannot be changed? As noted in the Alcoholics Anonymous credo, wisdom is knowing that I cannot turn back time and be with my father, but also recognizing that I never want to be that lazy again. Here is hoping that you can let your regrets help you make the most of your remaining years.

Housing Options

www.fiftyplusadvocate.com + March 2020 + fiftyplus advocate

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Marianne Delorey, Ph.D. is the executive director of Colony Retirement Homes. She can be reached at 508-755-0444 or mdelorey@colonyretirement.com and www.colonyretirementhomes.com. Archives of articles from previous issues can be read at www.fiftyplusadvocate.com.

• 17

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fiftyplus advocate + March 2020 + www.fiftyplusadvocate.com

money matters

Reverse mortgages and the ‘Sandwich Generation’ By Alain Valles, CRMP, CSA, MS, MBA Nonprofit Charitable Managing Director

Nope. I’m not talking about older peoples’ eating habits but the harsh reality of balancing the financial, physical, and emotional support of three generations. Two types of generational “sandwiches” Young-Middle-Old: The typical generational sandwich is the middle-aged person struggling to financially support their children (often grown adults) AND aging parents. This is also often called the squeeze generation. Out of de-

Reverse Mortgage

votion and duty, the 45-60 year old middle-aged person is caring for their parent(s) financially or in the role of an unpaid caregiver. And, at the same time, stressed trying to give support to their children, often in their 20’s and even 30’s. Studies show that the person in the middle is at a much higher risk of health, emotional, and financial stress. And, deferring their own financial planning will continue the cycle on to the next generation. Though counterintuitive, higher income and net worth families are at an even greater financial risk. One opinion is because they have not had to say over the years “no, we can’t afford that.” And now that a parent has health issues and an adult child is not living within their means, the person in the middle faces the stark financial reality of what my father-in-law would say – “the waiter will eventually bring the bill.” Something must proactively be done to keep the family in balance. Young-Old-Middle: A growing trend is where aging parents are caring both financially and phys-

ically for their grandchildren. In this case, the older person is in the middle caring for the younger generation. This may be due to a single parent situation, military duty, work demands or being unemployed, health situations, or sadly, addiction or legal challenges. The older person may still be working which only compounds the emotional and financial stress of keeping everything in equilibrium. My experience is even though the stock market is roaring it is just plain hard for the typical family to keep it all together. Older people don’t want to be a financial burden Every study shows that older people do not want to be a financial burden on their adult children. Older people desire to remain financially independent and will sacrifice their quality of life to achieve this goal. That might include not being able to pay for needed medical care and medicines, maintaining their homes, or incurring increasing credit card balances to cover bills. Too many times we hear – “Don’t

worry about me, I’ll be ok” and know in our hearts that is not true. The older person is not alone in these thoughts. Adult children don’t want to admit to their aging parents that finances are tight. They will postpone funding their retirement plans to provide for their parents’ needs. Adult children will incur more debt to fund their children’s education and other needs. This all can become a vicious cycle. It’s hard out there – reverse mortgage is a possible solution For fortunate homeowners 62 years old or older, a reverse mortgage may be the optimum solution to minimizing or eliminating the financial squeeze of the generational sandwiches. When used properly, a reverse mortgage gives the options of receiving immediate taxfree cash, a monthly check for life, and/or a line of credit to be used if ever needed. Each of these options provides that no monthly mortgage payment is required thereby increasing monthly cash flow. Of course, real estate taxes and insur-

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• 19

Get ready for National Grilled Cheese Sandwich Month By Janice Lindsay

t’s only March, but we all need time to get ready. April 1 is the beginning of National Grilled Cheese Sandwich Month. This is no April Fool joke, especially for those of us who take our grilled cheese sandwiches seriously. And there are lots of us. In a 2019 study done by international research firm yougov.com, 79 percent of Americans name grilled cheese as their favorite sandwich. Exactly why an international research firm based in London is asking Americans about sandwiches, I do not know. I haven’t been able to learn who started this worthy annual celebration, a whole month dedicated to grilled cheese, or when it started. I googled — come to think of it “google” sounds a

Inklings

Answers to Super Crossword (puzzle on previous page)

little like a grilled sandwich bubbling on a griddle — I googled “history grilled cheese sandwich month” and found 5,690,000 results. Not expecting to live long enough to check nearly 6 million comments, I speculate that the celebration’s beginnings are lost in the mists, or frying pan fumes, of time. A good traditional grilled cheese sandwich is crispy on the outside, gooey on the inside. In classical mode – developed when you buttered the bread so the sandwich wouldn’t stick to the griddle – it’s greasy. You have to lick your fingers. Non-stick pans enable you to make neater sandwiches. If you must. Poking around on the Internet for sandwich recipes, I was appalled to see some of the barbarous and sacrilegious ingredients with which chefs mutilate the sandwich’s simple perfection: peppers, leeks, potatoes, roast beef, crab, tuna, meatballs, marmalade. According to Kraft Foods, 33 percent of Americans want only cheese in their grilled cheese sandwiches. Favorite additions after that, says Kraft (and who knows grilled cheese better than Kraft?) are ham, bacon, turkey, tomato, onion, avocado. I am with the 33 percent who want only cheese, with one concession: toma-

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toes. I agree with 20 percent of Americans about that. Perhaps that’s because some of my earliest childhood memories of comfort food involve lunches of grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup, still my favorite meal. My brain’s flavor center is programmed to love the combination of cheese and tomatoes. (But don’t you dare come near my sandwich with that ketchup bottle.) It’s not clear who invented the grilled cheese sandwich, but similar recipes appear in the cookbooks of ancient Rome. It stands to reason: there’s

bread, there’s cheese, there’s fire. Bingo. Apparently the modern grilled cheese sandwich became popular in the 1920s, but was usually served openfaced. According to Kraft, the top slice of bread was added in the 1960s. I dispute that, since the two-slice tradition was well established in our family a couple of decades before that. Perhaps we were in the vanguard, because who am I to argue with Kraft. As I write, I must confess that, while I love grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup, I am a lazy cook. So — at the risk of censure from others who love my favorite meal – I will share my recipe for The Lazy Cook’s Grilled Cheese Sandwich and Tomato Soup. Heat a can of tomato soup. Meanwhile, make a piece of crispy toast and cut it into crouton-size cubes. Put the croutons in a soup bowl. Cut the cheese into similar cubes (I buy cheese in a block). Put those cubes in the bowl. Pour the hot soup over the toast and cheese. The cheese gets melty, the toast gets soupy, the soup gets cheesy and crunchy, and the lazy cook gets very happy. Contact jlindsay@tidewater.net

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‘Still So Excited’

Pop music icon Ruth Pointer reflects on her life in the spotlight… the highs, the lows and the lessons learned along the way.

By Jane Keller Gordon Assistant Editor HOPEDALE - Ruth Pointer’s life has been split in two halves: before and after. In many ways, after has been better. Before was based on the West Coast, where she rode a wave of success with the Pointer Sisters, known for their sonorous sounds and sinuous moves. During that time, however, Pointer’s life was riddled with alcohol and drugs, abuse, and four failed marriages, including one to Dennis Edwards of the Temptations. After is taking place in Massachusetts, where Pointer lives with her fifth husband, Mike Sayles, who grew up in Milford. Here they have happily raised their now 26-yearold twins, Ali and Conor. Pointer’s daughter Issa, from a previous marriage, also graduated from high

Ruth Pointer (center) with her daughter Issa (left) and granddaughter Sedako

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school in Massachusetts. Faun and Malik, Pointer’s eldest children, are from her first marriage. Life began for Pointer and her three sisters in Oakland, Calif. The children of ministers, she said, “We sang in church all the time.” In 1969, her sisters June and Bonnie formed, “Pointers, a Pair,” adding sister Anita later. “I never dreamed of being a famous singer, but I was leaving a very abusive relationship with my husband. I was a single mom with young children,” Pointer said. “I was making $400 a month as a key punch operator, and I realized that I could make $100 a session singing

backup. My sisters were gracious enough to allow me to join the group.” Renamed The Pointer Sisters, in 1974 the quartet won their first Grammy for Fairytale, for best country vocal performance. A few years later, Bonnie left the group to pursue a solo singing career. Now a trio, The Pointer Sisters achieved great success during the 1980s. They went on to earn two more Grammys, a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, and many Top 40 singles, including “I’m So Excited,” “Jump (For My Love),” and “He’s So Shy”. All of that came with a very high price.

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Ruth Pointer’s Grammy Awards

With co-author Marshall Terrill, Pointer detailed her struggles in her 2016 book, “Still So Excited!: My Life as a Pointer Sister.” She described the period in 1984, when at the age of 38, after years of abusing crack cocaine, she was hospitalized with viral meningitis. “That catapulted me into being concerned, and I had three children who I was raising as a single parent, and I thought, I’m all that they had,” she recalled. It was time for a change.

Pointer moved from LA to Malibu to get away from what she described as “bad influences.” She worked hard on breaking her addiction to drugs and alcohol, and then food too. She said, “Girl — when I stopped doing cocaine I ate like crazy. I needed to change… I got involved with L. Ron Hubbard’s Dianetics and it really helped me. But it was so damn expensive. My son Malik was in the 12-step program, so I gave it a try. I stayed in

it for years.” Three years into her work at recovering, Pointer met Sayles at a Malibu gym that he co-owned. He had gotten into body building with his best friend Howie Long, himself a native of Milford, former pro football player and now in the Football Hall of Fame. Pointer fell hard for Sayles, and the two decided to get married and have a child. At 46, she wasn’t sure that could happen. “I was in love and I wanted to raise a family in a traditional way with a mom and dad, which is something I had never done,” she said.” Thanks to IVF and a donor egg from a woman of Pointer’s likeness, Pointer and Sayles’ dream came true. Pointer continued to perform. Eight months pregnant, she was on the East Coast doing gigs and being interviewed on television about her IVF experience. She ended up having her babies by C-section in Providence, R.I. Pointer and her husband brought their newborn son and daughter back to Malibu. During that time, terrible fires were getting close to Pointer’s house. Sayles asked her to move to Massachusetts.

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“It sounded good to me. I didn’t have any more family in California, and I knew that we’d have a lot of help from his family. We had already agreed that we didn’t want to raise our children in California,” said Pointer. She added, “I’ve always loved New England ever since The Pointer Sisters performed here. I think of it as a beautiful and traditional place… Here people don’t care as much about materialistic things… People here don’t wear their worth on their bodies like they do in California.” Pointer and Sayles have built a wonderful life together, as evidenced by family photos displayed throughout their home, along with photos of Pointer with presidents and celebrities, and of course, awards. The Pointer Sisters still perform, now with Pointer, her daughter Issa, and her granddaughter Sadaka. They still make those sonorous sounds and sinuous moves to hits, including — “I’m So Excited,” “Jump (For My Love),” “Automatic,” Slow Hand,” and so many more. There is one change though – she now wears sneakers. “I’m done with high heels!”

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Working as Museum’s Train Curator keeps Beverly man on track By Brett Peruzzi Contributing Writer WENHAM - Rob Flanagan’s interest in model trains began when he received his first set as a Christmas present when he was a young boy, but little did he know that it would someday turn into a paying job, and one that he loves, as well. Flanagan works part-time as the train curator at the Wenham Museum in the North Shore town of Wenham, Massachusetts. The mission of the museum is to protect, preserve and interpret the artifacts of childhood, domestic life, and the history and culture of Boston’s North Shore. The 64-year-old Beverly resident became the official train curator 12 years ago after serving as a volunteer at the museum since the late 1980s. “As train curator I oversee the 10 permanent operating displays and temporary displays throughout the year, as well as a collection of model and toy trains and real railroad-related items,” Flanagan explained. “This involves install-

ing, cleaning, and repairing things, and talking with visitors and answering questions.” But while working with model trains inside a museum is an enjoyable avocation, his full-time jobs have kept him mostly outside. “My professional career is in the green industry, working in greenhouses, at garden centers, and for the last 23 years, on my own as a landscaper, from which I am about to retire. I received a BS in plant and soil science from UMass-Amherst in 1977.” So where did the museum’s train collection come from? “For the most part all of the model and toy trains as well as the real train items have been donated to us over the years,” said Flanagan, “with the exception of our large North Shore and Western HO layout that was built here in place by volunteers in the late nineties.” (A model train layout is the term used for the dioramas that are constructed by enthusiasts that contain the trains, tracks, buildings, people, and other items in the display.)

Rob Flanagan

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“The museum has its own collection of trains that are preserved for display and an ever-revolving collection of trains we use and operate every day,” he continued. “When we do temporary exhibits they come out of things we store to only use once in a while, as well as borrowed items and things from my own personal collection.” Flanagan noted that in addi-

tion to the museum’s permanent displays and temporary exhibits, they also have two “visiting layouts” that outside train clubs set up for a weekend in the museum’s function hall. And also, he said, “Every other year we take over the main display gallery and put on a ‘Train Time’ exhibit for the winter. This is made up of visiting displays, lots of hands-on things and educa-

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Reverse mortgages and the ‘Sandwich Generation’ Reverse mortgage | from page 18

ance must be paid and abide by other loan guidelines. The biggest challenge I find is not the mechanics or math of a reverse mortgage but rather facing the emotional challenge to acknowledge and address that the current financial situation is untenable and can very well destroy the caring and love that every family desire. And that is why we are here. Helping Hands Community Partners is an approved 501(c)(3) self-funded nonprofit company with the mission to educate people about senior housing options and, when appropriate, we can arrange reverse mortgages for qualified individuals. Get accurate information A great place to get reverse mortgage information is the free

“How to Use Your Home to Stay at Home” 36-page book. This is the official reverse mortgage consumer booklet approved by the U.S. Department of Housing & Urban Development and published by the National Council on Aging. We’re happy to mail it to you. Also, email to reversemortgage@hhcp.org to receive our ongoing “Reverse Mortgage Success” series. This will give you examples of how a reverse mortgage was the best solution to a life challenge. Email your challenge and we’re likely to have already invested resources towards a solution. Or, please feel comfortable to give me a call at 781-724-6221 and I’ll be happy to have an educational conversation with you about your unique situation and mail you the free 36-page book. Thank you.

Alain Valles is Managing Director of Helping Hands Community Partners, Inc. and was the first designated Certified Reverse Mortgage Professional in New England. He obtained a Master of Science from the M.I.T. Center for Real Estate, an MBA from the Wharton School, and graduated summa cum laude from UMass Amherst. Alain can be reached directly at 781-724-6221 or by email at reversemortgage@ hhcp.org. More articles can be found at www.fiftyplusadvocate.com.

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tional displays about trains around a common theme.” “I have a very large collection of my own trains, mostly in ‘O’ gauge and standard gauge, but also a little in some other gauges,” he explained. “’O’ gauge is the gauge most people think of when they talk about Lionel trains. Standard gauge is an old gauge that was made by many companies from the early 1900s until World War II.” Standard gauge, Flanagan noted, has Rob Flanagan with a train layout at the Wenham been revived by a Museum couple of companies over a hundred years old that has and has gained popbeen converted into a summer ularity again. house,” he said. “I’m also a con“It is about twice as large as ductor for the Conway Scenic Rail‘O’ gauge. I have an 8 by 16 feet road in North Conway. I have taken standard gauge layout of my own, many train trips and visit railroads but no place,” he admitted, “in my any time I can.” house to set it up, so I take it to train But the work he does as the shows to display as well as at the train curator at the Wenham Mumuseum sometimes.” seum holds a special place in his But Flanagan’s interest in trains heart. doesn’t end with the models, toys, “What I like most is seeing the and other artifacts he oversees at smiles and joy our train exhibits the museum. and displays bring to visitors, espe“I own an old caboose in North cially the kids.” Conway, New Hampshire that is

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