CODE M Magazine 2023 November Issue

TRANSFORMING THE LIVES OF MEN

BARON DAVIS THE BLACK SANTA

STUCK IN THE MUD

IS

WHAT A BEAUTIFUL LIFE SUBSCRIBE HERE

ANARCHY IN THE SANDBOX

+ WHEN SHE FEELS UNPROTECTED

NOVEMBER 2023 ISSUE

[ LIFE ]

44 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

[ HEALTH ]

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 45

[ CLE ]

22 NOVEMBER2023 / CODE M

[ BUSINESS ]

INSIDE

64 HAIR ABOVE THE REST Having an amazing hair style can be the difference between getting noticed and standing above the rest.

ON THE COVER

36

24 STUCK IN THE MUD

THE BLACK SANTA

14 MAN CODES

Retired NBA player, Baron Davis, is on a mission to inspire the world by building diverse characters who tell

Resiliency.

contemporary stories that reflect a cultural change to build the future for Black kids and generations to come.

12 MOVERS AND SHAKERS Get to know people who are making a difference in their careers and changing the world!

6 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

16 REIMAGINING COMMUNITY Jean Accius is on a mission to help the world get back to a sense of community and compassion where everyone feels love and hope.

18 WHEN SHE FEELS UNPROTECTED “The most disrespected person in America is the Black woman. The most unprotected person in America is the Black woman. The most neglected person in America is the Black woman.”

— Malcolm X

If you are struggling to get motivated, try these simple steps to develop a process to get going and stay going toward your goals.

31 ANARCHY IN THE SANDBOX American schools have become a warzone for teachers who are struggling to keep order in the classroom where students show little respect or discipline.

35 THE IMPACT OF FORGIVENESS As we talk about personal development and transformation, we must also talk about the impact of forgiveness in helping you grow.

CODE M / NOVEMBER2023 7

[ INSIDE ]

51 THANKSGIVING IS THE GIFT OF WELLNESS

44 COUPLES WHO PRAY TOGETHER, STAY TOGETHER The transformative power of prayer in marriage is the tie that bonds couples together for longlasting relationships filled with love and respect.

Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks for food and family. Fitness is the ultimate gift that you can provide to yourself and your loved ones this holiday season.

56 WHAT A BEAUTIFUL LIFE

Pete Escovedo celebrates his amazing 88 years of life by honoring his God-given talent by entertaining the world.

58 OMARION COMES FULL CIRCLE R&B sensation Omarion takes the music industry by storm with his latest release, Full Circle, which takes listeners back to when music fed the soul.

ADVERTISE WITH CODE M Blacks influence the latest trends of popular culture, fashion, and music more than any demographic. Reach them when you advertise with CODE M Magazine. With over 1.4 million viewers monthly, we have your audience.

Call 216-273-9400 to request a rate kit.

4 NOVEMBER2023 / CODE M

TRANSFORMING THE LIVES OF MEN

ENGINEER RADIO/PODCAST Imari Hill

PUBLISHER Bilal S. Akram

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Carole Anthony

ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES David Williams Kevin Jones IT CONSULTANT Anthony Jones Digital Jetstream, LLC CONTRIBUTING WRITERS David Christel Leslie Logan Brad J. Bowling Garrett Waller Bilal S. Akram Laron Harlem Bolling Smith Chris Matthews Anthony Kirby nce Burnley CODE MEDIA GROUP LLC

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STAFF

To the PUBLISHER

Sharif Akram

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CODE M Magazine was created to be a guiding force in creating a dialogue for black men everywhere. Code M focuses on the conversations of advancement, mental health, career choices, the political landscape and relationships that define and shape the lives of black men everywhere.

Code M Magazine is published

by CODE MEDIA GROUP, LLC © 2023 All Rights Reserved

[ TRAVEL ]

CODE M / NOVEMBER2023 9

MOVERS &

SHAKERS

Get to know people who are making a difference in their careers and changing the world!

LAURIE A. MURPHY Laurie A. Murphy, MBA, MPH, MS is the dedicated Executive Director of the Black Professionals Association Charitable Foundation (BPACF), a non-profit in Cleveland, Ohio, a position she has held since 2021. The mission of BPACF is to create opportunities for African American professionals by providing scholarships, leadership, and career development. The vision of BPACF is to be a catalyst that develops emerging professionals, celebrates distinguished leaders, and elevates our community. BPACF has provided $3.7 million in scholarships since 1985 and celebrated an untold number of Black professionals at all levels in their

12 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

careers.

Murphy oversees the development, management, and execution of programs, services, and events, and exploration of partnerships that make a difference. Murphy feels like it is a wonderful and humbling opportunity to partner with a visionary board that strives to make positive, lasting change. Murphy adds to the legacy of supporting career development in the pre-professional pipeline, the career development of future leaders, while saluting stellar professional role models in the community.

[ MOVERS & SHAKERS ]

JASON GARRETT Jason Garrett is a "Hybrid" Creative based out of Cleveland, Ohio.

He is multidisciplinary, with an eye for innovation and pixel perfection. Academically, he studied Design and Communications at Kent State University. Professionally, he has worked with some of the top brands and amassed an impressive and versatile client roster. In life, he is a family man, Cleveland sports enthusiast, Old Forester drinker and a hugger. Garrett's secret sauce is his versatility.

Garrett Prides himself on his array of skills graphic design, photography, videography, and motion graphics as well as his many titles: designer, creative, marketer, art director, educator, business owner, mentor, husband, and dad. Jason's creativity, passion, and work ethic is evident in every thing that he touches.

CRYSTAL BRYANT-AGYEMANG Crystal Bryant–Agyemang is an East Cleveland, Ohio native. As both a lawyer and social worker, she has a unique set of professional experiences that have helped to shape her career. Bryant spent the first 20 years of her career providing service to others in the public sector.

Beginning her career as a passionate advocate in the Greater Cleveland Drug Court for Cuyahoga County TASC, Co-founding Cleveland VOTES, and lastly serving as the Executive Director of the Cleveland Branch of the NAACP—service to and for others has always been a driving factor in the work that has been chosen for her to do.

Bryant now serves as the National Engagement Strategist on the Community Relations Team for the Corporate Responsibility Department at KeyBank.

BRIAN BOWLING Brian Bowling is the President and CEO of Lean Machine, a company that specializes in using Lean Six Sigma to help corporations with process improvement. The University of Akron graduate has clients across the USA and offers consulting services to companies that have gaps in performance. Lean Six Sigma is a process improvement approach that uses a collaborative team effort to improve performance by systematically removing operational waste and reducing process variation. It combines Lean Management and Six Sigma to increase the velocity of value creation in business processes.

Bowling, who is certified with his Black Belt in Lean Six Sigma, specializes in reducing risk while increasing revenue for the companies his firm works with. To date, his company has saved his clients over 50 million by impacting how they do business.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 13

START

Nelson Mandela

RESILIENCY MAN CODES:

Compiled by Bilal S. Akram

"Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again." - Nelson Mandela

"Where there is no struggle, there is no strength."

- Oprah Winfrey

“Life is very interesting…in the end, some of your greatest pains become your greatest strengths.” - Drew Barrymore

“Resilience is an important key. Protect the key to your peaceful heart.”- Angelica Hopes

“Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient.” - Steve Maraboli

“If the fire in your heart is strong enough, it will burn away any obstacles that come your way.” - Suzy Kassem

“Once you carry your own water, you will learn the value of every drop.” - African Proverb

“Resilience is born by grounding yourself in your own loveliness, hitting notes you thought were way out of your range.”

- Gregory Boyle

"We don't even know how strong we are until we are forced to bring that hidden strength forward." – Isabel Allende “Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” - Khalil Gibran “The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.” - Ernest Hemingway

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"You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength." - Marcus Aurelius 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 - 8 “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair;” “9 persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.” NIV

CODE M / NOVEMBER2023 13

[ START ]

REIMAGINING COMMUNITY Jean Accius is on a mission to help the world get back to a sense of community and compassion where everyone feels love and hope.

Written by DAVID CHRISTEL David has been ghostwriting books for well-known people since 1995. He is also the author of Married Men Coming Out: The Ultimate Guide to Becoming the Man You Were Born to Be.

“W

e’ve lost so much in the last couple of years that I think it’s an important time for us to reimagine our collective future. Regardless of where you live, the sector, or within your organization, it’s time to recommit to community, to recommit to connection. But I don’t think we can tackle the big issues if we’re not willing to fully appreciate the commonality of our own sense of humanity and community.”

Those are the words of Dr. Jean Accius, President & CEO of Creating Healthier Communities (CHC) and a nationally recognized leader and author on aging, longevity, health, and long-term care policy.

In recent years, our sense of community has been shut down due to COVID. The forced isolation caused people — across all ages — to withdraw, to disconnect, their ability to communicate as before diminished and replaced by technology and AI. PostCOVID saw people gingerly stepping outside their homes to discover life had forever changed.

“The Surgeon General actually called loneliness and social isolation across all life stages an epidemic. It’s caused anxiety, fear, depression, mental disorders — we have a mental health crisis.”

Jean believes that we need to get back to our sense of community, our connections, and move forward in a way that really

16 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

Jean Accius

helps our collective well-being as a country. It means ensuring everyone in America has equal access to opportunity. It means bringing people in from the margins and acknowledging that our systems and society are fragile, and that we’re the only ones who can work together to build anew.

“We need to encourage individuals to take the time to either view or listen to others, to engage with someone who’s different from them. Unfortunately, we’ve gotten to a place of polarization. We need to move to a place where we can agree to disagree.”

In his work, Jean seeks to foster an environment where people can be seen, heard and understood. “I think it’s dangerous for us to think that everything is purely black and white.

There is so much that’s gray, which gives us an opportunity to take into account multiple perspectives.”

Jean feels that leaders, whether in the policy space, in business or running a nonprofit organization, have a responsibility to model what leadership looks like — and to get back to

[ START ]

CAP STRONG

some of the basics in terms of what exactly leadership is. He believes that leadership is an opportunity to serve and an opportunity to model the behavior that brings out the best in others.

His organization sits at the intersection of business, nonprofit, government, and community.

For more 65 years, CHC has worked together with partners to address the barriers to good health and equity and create resilient communities where everyone can thrive. Everything is centered on communities and their needs. “In order for us to really maintain and sustain ourselves and to ensure that communities are healthier long term, they have to be in the driver’s seat of their own destiny.”

leagues find that a healthier community means healthier families, it means healthier workers, it means stronger businesses, and a more resilient economy.

“We spent a significant amount of time listening, observing, looking at the community through an asset lens, and helping to co-create solutions in a way that meets that community’s needs — because again, it has to be community centric.” ●

Through Creating Healthier Communities, Jean and his col-

Jean Accius and his lovely family.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 17

LIFE

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[ LIFE ]

WHEN SHE FEELS

UNPROTECTED “The most disrespected person in America is the Black woman. The most unprotected person in America is the Black woman. The most neglected person in America is the Black woman.”

— Malcolm X Written by BRAD BOWLING Brad Bowling is the President of CODE Media Group, LLC. Bowling has his BA in mass media communication and an MBA in marketing. He contributes articles to the magazine continuing his love for writing.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 19

[ LIFE]

Blacks are being denied the right to vote all over the country.

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T

[ LIFE ]

here is no doubt that the Black woman is the most judged and criticized woman on the planet. Society has labeled her mean, standoffish, masculine, and intolerant. Yet she is expected to outwork all the others, raise children by herself, and compete at a level that is unmatched. And without apology she does. Black women have done an incredible job going to school, working hard to attain degrees, getting the most important jobs in America, and raising kids at the same time.

way she interacts with those around her.

She should be celebrated instead of judged. She should be supported instead of criticized. But what if everyone has it wrong?

What if we’re missing something? Has anyone considered investigating how a Black woman feels and behaves when unprotected?

Feeling unprotected comes out in other ways. Black women often will engage others from a slightly defensive position until they feel comfortable with those around them. They’ll withhold their emotions for fear of feeling weak. This has nothing to do with being mean or standoffish, it has more to do with feeling weak in a world where weakness is taken advantage of.

And because they’re the backbone of their own families and lives, they can’t let their guard down for a second.

Women who are unprotected must move differently. They must take different things into consideration when they’re alone.

They must become the man and woman for their kids if they’re going to parent well. And they’ll always engage the world from the aspect of protecting themselves when they have no protection.

What are they protecting themselves from?

“My father was there to protect me my whole life. But when I got married, my husband didn’t protect me, so I must protect myself,” Cheryl from Akron, Ohio said. “So that meant I had to move differently than when I was a little girl. I didn’t let people get close to me until I felt like they couldn’t hurt me.”

When a woman does or doesn’t have the protection of a man, she must create the protection for herself to go out into the world and thrive. Creating protection for herself often means changing the

The feeling of being unprotected means that Black women must fill the void themselves. This lack of protection results in different types of behavior.

“For me, it means always getting a car that is new, because I can’t be broken down on the side of some road,” Tanisha, from Boston, said. “I promised myself that I would never have to depend on some man to come to save me, so I do things to not need saving.”

They’ll also make decisions that don’t allow them to be taken advantage of. This will make them appear mean or evil when they’re just protecting their boundaries. Black women always feel marginalized because society doesn’t give them the respect they deserve. The result of feeling disrespected in the workplace means that they cannot enjoy their work environments either.

“I am constantly being challenged and made to feel like my ideas aren’t good when I’m at work,” Shardye from Dallas said. “I always have to speak for a few minutes for my white counterparts to realize that my opinions are valuable enough

Black women are sometimes mischaracterized as being mean due to having no protection.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 21

[ LIFE ]

22 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

[ LIFE ] to consider, it can be exhausting.”

The unfortunate realization that over 65 percent of Black women are raising children out of wedlock also means that they’re tired when they get home from work. That, coupled with the understanding that women are nurturers and not disciplinarians, means parenting children often requires having to become masculine to keep order and discipline in the house.

“I have to say, that I would not know how to react if I had a man try to protect me,” Claudine said. “Opening doors, killing the bug, or putting gas in my car, I have always done those things, so I don’t know how I would respond if I had someone try to do those things for me.”

The women interviewed for this article realized just how much they counter-balance themselves due to not having protection.

For those that did not have the protection of a male growing up said they struggled to see it or acknowledge the value of it when they did encounter it.

The lack of support from a male influence at home leaks into their relationships with everyone when they’re forced into a dual role at home.

“After I got divorced, I realized that my alpha husband was actually trying to protect me, but I saw it as him trying to be controlling,” Ann from Virginia explained, “This created real tension in our marriage. I wish I’d realized this when I was married.

It might have changed my decision to end it.”

Women who did have or feel protected by a father or male figure don’t struggle with the emotion of feeling unprotected.

They express the joy of being able to rely on a male counterpart to protect them. They also expressed that they were able to fall back into their feminine characteristics when they met someone who made them feel safe.

Those who didn’t have the protection of a male growing up said they struggled to see it or acknowledge the value of it when they did encounter it.

They acknowledged the fact that they do have to be more masculine when navigating the world. They do have to wear both hats when parenting, and they understand that turning off their need to protect themselves when they do meet a masculine man is difficult.

For the man who dates a woman who might feel unprotected, it means making sure to get a good understanding of how to provide the assistance she needs to date her. The women who were interviewed desire protection from a man. They also said that they would be willing to embrace their feminine nature if they felt like the man in their lives could fill that void effectively.

But they also said that they would not give up ground until the man exhibited the characteristics that are needed for them to feel protected.

There is no easy way to resolve a woman’s feelings of being unprotected, but there is a rainbow at the end of the journey when the conditions are right. It comes with a balance of a good relationship built on respect, trust, and adequate protection. ●

Black women will often feel more lonely due to the lack of protection from the daily chores of their life.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 23

[ LIFE ]

STUCK IN THE

MUD

If you are struggling to get motivated, try these simple steps to develop a process to get going and stay going toward your goals.

By Bolling Smith

24 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

[ LIFE ]

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 25

[ LIFE ]

26 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

[ LIFE ]

I

t’s happened to everyone at some point or another. You can’t seem to get going. For some strange reason, you have lost the motivation to do anything meaningful. And it gets worse by the day. It seems controllable at first, but then you realize that you’ve spent twenty days creating some really bad habits for yourself that, if not changed quickly, will have you homeless and broke.

Don’t panic. Losing motivation happens to everyone. There are many reasons that people get stuck in the mud. Most of the reasons come with a change. It could be a change in process or a change in the structure of your day. But change impacts people in different ways. The goal is to not let change impact your overall mood or mode of operation.

DAILY THINGS TO DO The first step in getting back on track is to create a list of things to do daily. This list should not be things that can’t be accomplished in a day. They must be obtainable goals that allow you to complete them with little to no effort. The goal of writing things down is to begin to hold yourself accountable for your daily tasks.

If you can begin to complete the simple things you need to do, you’ll begin to see the daily results of getting things done.

Writing things down allows you to track and grade your progress. If you have ten daily goals, at the end of the day, grade yourself on the completion of those goals. The percentage you

Make sure to give yourself plenty of time to get things done so you can track the results of your efforts. Make sure that you build in the rest of relaxation in between working.

Getting out of the mud and getting back to a routine that works is paramount if you’re going to get back to being productive.

Building and maintaining productive habits can reduce, control, and even avoid not being motivated.

If you are the kind of person who never had any motivation, these simple changes can also help you. Being productive comes with a score of things that need to be done to develop a consistent behavior, which leads to a desired outcome. Whether your goals are about health, finances, or professionalism, consistency is the key when it comes to reaching the finish line.

get is the grade you earned that day. Anything less than a B is a non-productive day.

You must be able to maintain a B grade if you’re going to actively pursue a goal. Make sure that you create tasks that can be tracked and are measurable. There is no reason to set yourself up for failure.

DEVELOP A ROUTINE When it comes to getting out of the mud, you must create a routine and stick to it. Take yourself out of the equation and

Finding the motivation to exercise is one of the first things to do when trying to get out of the mud.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 27

[ LIFE ]

Developing your passion is the key to success.

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[ LIFE ]

develop a process you can operate by. This will reduce the amount of time you spend doing nothing and replace it with actionable items. Set the alarm clock for a certain time to get up. Create time windows for completing the next tasks.

Make sure to give yourself plenty of time to get things done so you can track the results of your efforts. Make sure to build in rest and relaxation in between working. If you sit at a desk all day, build in breaks or time to get away from the desk so you don’t burn out. For every three hours of work, take a 20minute walk to keep your blood flowing and get away from your work.

You’ll find that these scheduled breaks are simple rewards for staying focused on tasks and begin to look forward to them.

More importantly, you’ll find that these scheduled breaks will allow you to dial back into your work knowing that you will have another break in the next three hours.

DEVELOP AN EVEN MINDSET When you’re working to get out of the mud to get back to being motivated, understand that there will be days and moments that challenge your mindset. There will be obstacles thrown at you that question if you’re doing the right things.

You must remember not to get too low when it’s not working out, and you must also remember not to get too high when everything is going as planned.

Developing an even mindset will allow you to maintain effort and energy no matter the circumstances of the day. Remember, the goal is never the problem. The intensity to hit the goal is the problem if you let it be. So, work the plan, no matter what kind of stress or issues come. You will find that they will

pass just as quickly as they arrived.

Arm yourself with the things that maintain your position. This means that you need to surround yourself with the proper perspective, people, and lifestyle that will aid in the completion of your goals.

EXERCISE IS THE KEY When it comes to creating and maintaining the consistency needed to obtain a goal, exercise is the fuel that keeps the desire lit. The benefits of exercise are better sleep, increased healthy hormones for positive thoughts, better eating habits, better physique, and better physical health. All these things are needed when you’re working to get back to becoming who you need to be to hit your goals.

Exercise also allows you to create meaningful time away from the daily stress of working to hit your goals. The hours you put into yourself physically will help you work ten times longer on the actual work you need to do.

You’ll feel so proud of yourself for putting the time into maintaining your physical health. By the way, if you’re not healthy enough to enjoy the fruits of your labor, what is it all for anyway?

These are the few simple steps you can take to get out of the mud and get back to being who you were or knew you always could be. Don’t be embarrassed or ashamed that you got stuck in the mud. Forgive yourself, and get back out there — the world needs you! ●

Do not blame yourself for being unmotivated.

Forgive yourself and work to get back to being the person you know you can be.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 29

[ LIFE ]

30 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

OPINION

ANARCHY IN THE SANDBOX DEAR CY BORG: A COLUMN WRITTEN BY CHATGPT

American schools have become a warzone for teachers who are struggling to keep order in the classroom where students show little respect or discipline.

Written by CY BORG Cy Borg is an artificial intelligence writer. Using Open A.I., Cy responds to various prompts with fully-qualified answers using the internet and technology.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 31

[ OPINION ]

I

n a shocking turn of events, children worldwide have staged a revolution against respect and discipline, declaring their right to live in a state of perpetual chaos. Parents and adults everywhere are left scratching their heads, wondering what happened to the days when kids actually listened and obeyed. It seems that the little rascals have decided to take matters into their own sticky, cookiecovered hands.

Gone are the times when a stern look from a parent was enough to keep a child in line. Nowadays, it’s more like a mere suggestion that is promptly dismissed with an eye-roll and a dismissive “whatever.” Children have become experts at tuning out any form of authority, preferring to forge their own path through life, or rather, through their parents’ sanity.

Parents who once wielded their disciplinary powers like Jedi knights now find themselves powerless against the dark side of childhood rebellion. It’s as if a memo went out to all children,

instructing them to unite and overthrow the oppressive regime of rules and responsibilities. The result? Anarchy in the sandbox.

It’s not uncommon to witness scenes straight out of a slapstick comedy routine. Parents chase their kids around grocery stores as they gleefully knock down displays of canned goods like bowling pins. Bedtime routines have transformed into epic battles of willpower, with children vowing to stay awake until the crack of dawn and parents desperately trying to keep their eyes open.

Respect? Forget about it. Kids these days seem to think it’s a foreign concept, akin to eating broccoli or wearing pants that actually fit. They prefer to communicate in a language that consists of grunts, eye rolls, and the occasional monosyllabic response. Parents are left wondering if they accidentally gave birth to cavemen rather than children.

The situation has become so dire that some parents have resorted to enrolling themselves in boot camps designed to teach them the ancient art of child control. They spend hours learning negotiation tactics, mastering the art of timeouts, and practicing their stern faces in the mirror. Unfortunately, their efforts often prove fruitless as children have developed immunity to these traditional methods.

In a bizarre twist, it seems that the tables have turned, and children are now the ones doling out discipline. Parents are subjected to trial by tantrum, with children presiding over impromptu courts, demanding unreasonable requests like unlimited screen time and ice cream for breakfast. If parents dare to object, they risk being banished to the land of eternal timeout.

But amidst the chaos and the uproar, there is a silver lining.

For all their defiance, children still manage to bring joy and laughter to their parents’ lives. They are a constant reminder that life is unpredictable and that sometimes the best way to navigate it is to let go and embrace the madness.

So, parents, take heart. Remember that these tumultuous times are merely a phase, and your children will eventually grow up and out of their rebellious ways. Until then, hold on tight, keep a sense of humor, and maybe invest in some noise-canceling headphones. After all, laughter is the best way to survive the revolution of the tiny terrors we call children. ●

Teachers all across the country are leaving the teaching profession due to unruly kids.

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[ LIFE ]

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 33

[ LIFE ]

34 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

[ OPINION ]

THE IMPACT OF

FORGIVNESS As we talk about personal development and transformation, we must also talk about the impact of forgiveness in helping you grow.

Written by DR. WILLIE JOLLEY Dr. Willie Jolley, Hall of Fame speaker, Sirius XM radio host, and global best-selling author of A Setback Is a Setup For a Comeback and An Attitude of Excellence.

F

orgiveness is a powerful tool for developing yourself.

Holding grudges is like drinking poison and hoping it will kill the person you are angry with. Bitterness and malice do more damage to the person holding the bitterness and malice than the person who is the object of that anger. Many illnesses and maladies are the result of bitterness and anger that’s not resolved or released. Psychologists proclaim loudly that it’s best to let it go!

In the marriage book I wrote with my wife, Dee, Make Love, Make Money, Make It Last, and in our TED Talk, we share how we have been married for almost 40 years and haven’t had an argument in over 35 years. That doesn’t mean we always agree, but rather we have learned to disagree without being disagreeable, and when we have an issue, we talk about it. Forgiveness is the loving cornerstone of our ability to rise above and beyond our differences.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to forget or condone what the person did, but it does mean that you must not let them have unpaid rent in your mind and spirit. You must choose to forgive, and when you do — you start to win more!

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. taught us great lessons on forgiveness and the transformational power it offers. He said, “I have decided to stick with love because hate is too great a burden to bear. We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is also devoid of the power to love!”

When you choose to forgive, you release the chains that keep you bound; you’re now able to move forward with a renewed spirit.

Forgiveness is a critical component of relationships. Forgiveness can impact personal relationships, business relationships, family relationships, and marriage and love relationships. Many marriages are destroyed because of unforgiveness. I love this quote, “Marriage is a union of two imperfect people, who are working on perfecting forgiveness!”

Today, I want to encourage you to forgive someone who has hurt you and decide to win! It can transform your life! ● To learn some tips from our TED Talk “Never Argue Again in Marriage,” go to www.jolleymarriage.com to view the talk and get a free chapter from the book, where we discuss communication and forgiveness.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 35

COVER

BARON DAVIS IS

Retired NBA player, Baron Davis, is on a mission to inspire the world by building diverse characters who tell contemporary stories that reflect a cultural change to build the future for Black kids and generations to come.

Written by BRAD BOWLING Brad Bowling is the President of CODE Media Group, LLC. Bowling has his BA in mass media communication and an MBA in marketing. He contributes articles to the magazine continuing his love for writing.

THE

BLACK

SANTA Cover and inside photos taken by Franklin Solomon.

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[ COVER ]

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 37

[ COVER ]

C

hristmas has always been a special time of year for anyone who covets giving and celebrating blessings.

For Blacks, Christmas is fun but doesn’t necessarily represent them in a way where they can really embrace the holiday.

Enter Baron Davis, the celebrated NBA basketball player who was out on injury all season. He was invited to a Halloween party and had nothing to wear, so he decided to go as

Claus, and it was a huge hit. I realized then that I was filling a void.”

Davis trademarked Black Santa and a company was born.

Davis played in the NBA for thirteen years for several different teams. During his career, he was loved by the fans who watched him and developed a national following due to the way he played the game.

“I always connected with people when I played the game

Davis’s mission to provide a feel-good, inspirational product that fills the void of what Blacks need and want during Christmas is fulfilling his goal of creating meaningful content and allowing the community to have a deeper connection with their own Christmas experience.

Santa. Little did he know that his costume would resonate with the entire party and from that an idea was born.

“I was laying there injured and trying to figure out what I was going to do with the rest of my life. I wanted to become a content creator but didn’t know what content I wanted to create,” Davis said. “It was Halloween, and I had no costume, so I went as Santa

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because I played hard and loved to give the fans what they wanted,” Davis said. “So I knew after I retired that I wanted to stay connected to people and find a way to be impactful off the court.”

The UCLA player made a name for himself in the two years that he played for the university by playing with spirit and excitement. Davis was named the PAC 10 freshman of the

[ COVER ]

Davis played for five NBA teams during his 13-year career.

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[ HEALTH ]

Getting help for mental illness is still a struggle for most men.

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[ COVER ] year his freshman year and made the All-Freshman year as well.

That mentality proved successful for Davis as he played for five NBA teams where he was a two-time NBA All-Star and two-time NBA steals leader.

Davis was the third pick in the 1999 NBA draft by the Charlotte Hornets. In his NBA debut, a 100–86 win over the Orlando Magic, Davis scored nine points and added five rebounds, two assists, and two steals. In Davis’s first year, he backed up Eddie Jones and David Wesley, as the Hornets lost in the first round of the playoffs to the 76ers in four games.

In the summer of 2002, the Hornets relocated from Charlotte, North Carolina to New Orleans. In the New Orleans Hornets’ inaugural season, Davis suffered multiple injuries that limited him to just fifty games. He was still able to lead the Hornets back to the playoffs, but they would fall to the Allen Iverson-led Philadelphia 76ers in the first round. Iverson would later describe Davis as the most difficult defensive assignment of his career.

On February 24, 2005, Davis was traded from the Hornets to the Golden State Warriors for guard Speedy Claxton and veteran forward Dale Davis after tension with the Hornets’ coaching staff and several nagging injuries. The move created one of the more potent backcourts in the NBA with Davis and star guard Jason Richardson. It also saw Davis’s return to California, where he had craved to return since his college days at UCLA.

On July 1, 2008, Davis verbally agreed to a 5-year, $65 million deal to play for his hometown team, the Los Angeles Clippers, and officially signed with the Clippers on July 10, 2008. Davis initially decided to join the Clippers with the intent of playing with Elton Brand, but Brand shockingly opted out of his contract to sign with the Philadelphia 76ers. After officially signing with the Clippers, Davis said that Brand’s departure had no impact on his decision to come to Los Angeles.

In November 2009, at a home game vs. the Denver Nuggets, Baron reached and surpassed the 5,000-assist mark. In his third year with the Clippers, a rejuvenated and healthy Davis saw some success playing alongside youngsters Eric Gordon, DeAndre Jordan, and Rookie of the Year Blake Griffin. While Davis was finally showing the ability that prompted Clippers management to sign him, run-ins with the coaching staff and Clippers’ owner Donald Sterling, as well as the team’s decision to get younger and rebuild, made the Clippers decide to move in a new direction.

The success on the court led to Davis having success off the

The Black Santa brand allows Davis to create meaningful content that inspires Black children.

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[ COVER ] court as well. The Black Santa brand represents an opportunity for Blacks to feel more included in the holiday spirit. Davis and his team thoughtfully created a brand around the idea of Black Santa and knew it would mean a lot to the kids who got a chance to experience it.

“With all that’s going on in this country, and particularly in the African American community, I wanted to offer heroes and role models through storytelling. Black Santa is the first character. His mission is to celebrate diversity, the joy of giving, and the magic of good. He’s here to bring people together and have fun,” Davis explained.

The brand is doing more than that. Davis has turned his idea into an enterprise. Black Santa gives Blacks the opportunity to purchase all kinds of items tailored to the Black Christmas experience. From Christmas cards to ornaments, wrapping paper, sweaters, and hats, the Black Santa brand allows those who want a deeper connection with Christmas to do so.

Christmas experience.

“We partner with brands to create positive campaigns that speak to a grander audience, and then we create a quality product. These things combined represent the feeling and the emotion of the company,” Davis said.

The brand has expanded beyond just Black Santa. It has gone on to create a host of characters that complete the Black Santa experience. Those characters are brought to life through exceptional storytelling and character design from the Black Santa team.

And the response has been overwhelming. Davis’s mission to provide a feel-good, inspirational product that fills the void of what Blacks need and want during Christmas is fulfilling his goal of creating meaningful content and allowing the community to have a deeper connection with their own

Davis had an excellent first career in the NBA, but his second career as a business owner and content creator might garner him more awards and accolades than his NBA career ever could. Davis wanted to create a more meaningful holiday experience, and he did just that. ● To view or order your own Black Santa products, visit: https:// shop.blacksanta.com/

Characters from the Black Santa Lineup.

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HEALTH

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[ HEALTH ]

COUPLES WHO PRAY TOGETHER, STAY TOGETHER The transformative power of prayer in marriage is the tie that bonds couples together for long-lasting relationships filled with love and respect.

Written by CHRIS A. MATTHEWS Chris A. Matthews is a licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT) and approved supervisor for the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy. Visit chrisAmatthews.com to learn more about his work with couples and families.

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[ HEALTH ]

M

arriage is an intricate journey, filled with ups and downs, and the ever-present winds of change.

When couples set out on this path to build a resilient and enduring union, they often seek valuable tools and strategies to navigate the intricate terrain of married life. One such tool that has recently gained recognition for its potential to positively impact marriages is the practice of prayer.

In this article, we embark on a journey into the world of highly religious couples, each sharing an impressive 20-year bond.

Their shared secret? The act of praying together. We shall explore the reasons behind why these couples who pray together tend to stay together, and how this seemingly simple act can be a catalyst for profound transformation within a marriage.

Marriage, as it turns out, is far from being a static institution; instead, it’s a continuous process of growth and adaptation.

Much like individuals themselves, marriages evolve over time.

Couples who have weathered the challenges and shared joys of decades together understand that transformation isn’t an abrupt occurrence but rather a cumulative, adaptive, and facilitating journey. As these couples gracefully adapt to life’s myriad challenges and the ever-shifting landscapes of their own selves, they turn to various tools that aid them on their remarkable journey.

Our voyage begins with a comprehensive research study that has identified 368 couples, all highly religious, who have forged

bonds lasting an average of two decades. These couples have not been immune to the changes that life inevitably brings, yet they have found a way not only to endure but to flourish.

Their enduring marriages are a testament to the potency of cumulative, adaptive, and facilitating transformation.

At the heart of these remarkable unions lies the practice of prayer. For these couples, prayer is a cornerstone of their marital transformation. They do not perceive prayer as a quick -fix miracle worker; instead, it is a catalyst for meaningful change. Prayer serves as a tool to gain deeper insights and discover effective solutions to the inevitable challenges that married life presents. In this exploration, we shall delve into the ways in which sincere and profound prayer equips these couples with the tools necessary to navigate the intricate journey of married life successfully.

Understanding the Research Before we dive into the transformative potential of prayer in marriage, it is imperative to gain a comprehensive understanding of the research that reinforces the value of prayer.

Researchers have dedicated themselves to the investigation of how Evangelicals in their interpretation of the Christ-groom metaphor within the context of their own relationships and spiritual experiences have found consistent marital growth by way of faith-based practices. The participants in this study described their understanding of Jesus within this metaphor in a multitude of ways: •

Some perceived Jesus as tender and intimately desiring a relationship.

•

Others saw Him as relentlessly pursuing them with passionate love.

•

Some viewed Jesus as a stable and companionate partner, highlighting reliability.

•

Many described Jesus as continually sacrificing and generously giving.

•

Some believed that Jesus provided for their needs, even when they could not reciprocate.

These participants have employed the image of the husband or lover God to sanctify their marital relationships, attributing sacred qualities to their unions. In this sacred metaphor, they view their spouses as “gifts” from God and consider Jesus as a guiding example of how they should behave within their own

Couples who put God in their marriage tend to stay together longer than couples that do not.

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[ HEALTH ]

White doctors will under prescribe medications to Blacks based on their bias.

CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 47

[ HEALTH ] marriages.

It’s important to note that interpretations of this metaphor were not uniform among the participants; some applied it quite literally, acknowledging hierarchical aspects in their marriages, while others grappled with these hierarchical elements, choosing to favor more equal partnerships. Nevertheless, the metaphor has been a powerful influence, promoting qualities such as patience and love as ways of relating to their spouses.

Take the example of Tal, a devoted Muslim husband, who turns to prayer when he is upset. During prayer, he centers himself and seeks guidance. By the time he returns to his wife, he is in a better emotional state to engage in a productive discussion. This approach highlights the role of prayer as a calming and clarifying force that aids in problem-solving within the marriage.

•

The Interplay Between Spirituality and Marriage

The study reveals that the Christ-groom and Church-bride metaphor has the potential to enhance the commitment of couples to one another. It encourages the embodiment of qualities such as unconditional love, patience, and sacrifice, while also enhancing their conceptions of God. The Transformative Power of Prayer It is evident that the transformation of a marriage is an ongoing process, and highly religious couples have discovered that prayer plays a pivotal role in their personal and marital development. But how does this process work, and what are the key factors that contribute to the enduring bond of couples who pray together?

•

Enhanced Communication and Understanding – One of the most notable benefits of couples who pray together is their ability to foster improved communication and understanding. When couples engage in prayer together, they create a dedicated space for a deeper connection. This shared practice provides a safe haven for them to express their desires, hopes, and concerns, deepening their connection, and enhancing mutual understanding.

For example, consider Zach, a devout Latter-day Saint husband, who, together with his wife, prays every night, offering specific prayers for each other. This shared spiritual communion strengthens their bond as they express their desires for each other’s well-being. Through prayer, couples find a platform to prioritize selflessness over selfishness, focusing on their partner’s needs and thus elevating the relationship.

•

Conflict Resolution – Another prominent benefit of prayer in marriage is its role in conflict resolution. Disagreements and challenges are a common occurrence in any marriage, and prayer provides couples with a constructive means to address these issues. When conflicts arise, sincere and poignant prayer offers couples a brief respite to step back from the situation, regain control over their emotions, and become more rational and reasonable in their discussions.

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Shared Values and Goals – Praying together also serves to reinforce shared values and goals within a marriage. It is vital that partners in a marriage share fundamental beliefs and aspirations. Through prayer, couples align themselves with their shared spiritual values and remind each other of their common objectives, ensuring a strong sense of purpose within the relationship.

Mary, a devoted Christian wife, underscores the significance of their nightly prayers with her husband as a reminder of their shared faith and purpose. They employ prayer as a means to seek guidance and reaffirm their commitment to both their faith and each other, thus establishing a robust foundation for their marriage.

•

Encouragement of Gratitude – Prayer within marriage also encourages a profound sense of gratitude. By expressing thankfulness for each other and the blessings they have received, couples create a positive and appreciative atmosphere within their relationship. Gratitude holds the power to counteract negative emotions and significantly enhance marital satisfaction.

Lina, a devoted Jewish wife, emphasizes the role of gratitude within her marriage. Both she and her husband include expressions of gratitude in their daily prayers, which have helped them focus on the positives in their relationship. Gratitude becomes a means of acknowledging each other’s contributions and strengths, ultimately creating a more harmonious and fulfilling partnership.

•

A Source of Strength During Difficult Times – In the evershifting landscape of marriage, couples inevitably face trials and tribulations, stemming from both internal and external sources. Highly religious couples find that prayer serves as a profound source of strength during these challenging moments. It provides them with a sense of spiritual support and resilience, ultimately enabling them to weather the storms of life together.

Ella, a devout Buddhist wife, shared the role of prayer in their marriage during her husband’s illness. She attests that their shared prayers provided them with a profound sense of unity and strength, helping them confront the uncertainty of the

[ HEALTH ] situation with courage and faith, ultimately bringing them closer together.

As couples strive to unlock the secrets of enduring and flourishing marriages, couples who pray together offer profound insights.

The transformation within a marriage is not a one-time event but rather a continuous journey of growth and adaptation. These couples have demonstrated that prayer, as a catalyst for positive change within a marriage, isn’t a panacea but a source of guidance, understanding, and strength.

Through enhanced communication, conflict resolution, shared values, gratitude, and the ability to face challenges head-on, prayer emerges as the glue that binds these couples together. They have learned the transformative power of prayer, showcasing the enduring strength of marriages where partners not only grow together but also pray together, thus ensuring their bond remains unshaken through life’s myriad seasons.

It’s clear that in the ever-evolving river of marriage, the transformative power of prayer keeps couples grounded, connected, and resilient. It serves as a reminder that in the face of change, challenges, and the passage of time, couples who pray together are more likely to stay together. ●

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[ HEALTH]

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[ HEALTH ]

THANKSGIVING IS THE GIFT OF WELLNESS Thanksgiving is a time to give thanks for food and family. Fitness is the ultimate gift that you can provide to yourself and your loved-ones this holiday season.

I

magine if all men looked at their health and fitness the same way they looked at their Thanksgiving plate.

Strength training is your meat and potatoes, kind of like turkey and sweet potato yams. Cardio is a nonnegotiable that is there to make everything better just like stuffing or dressing, collard greens, and a biscuit.

Stretching is like the whole Thanksgiving dinner altogether because most men only do it once a year; yet every time they do, they wonder why they don’t do it more often. This is a call for all to lock in for three weeks of consistency before the big day. It’s time to clean up their diet and get off the couch in preparation for a well-earned indulgence on Thanksgiving Day. It’s time to get their act together because this November is about Thanksgiving, the Gift of Wellness to

Written by GARRETT WALLER Garrett is the founder and owner of Garrett Waller, LLC, "A Fitness, Health, & Lifestyle Company." Garrett has his BS in Psychology and is a nationally certified personal trainer. He helps people find more freedom in their lives through a commitment to fitness and an active lifestyle. https://garrettwaller.com

oneself and their family.

First of all, let’s keep gratitude at the forefront of this holiday season when looking around the room at family and loved ones this Thanksgiving. Be grateful for the blessing of family,

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[ HEALTH ] health, and food. Thanksgiving dinner represents another year that each person’s presence is possible and that it’s to be celebrated. Take advantage of the opportunity to deepen the family fellowship through a shared experience of fitness.

For the men who are known in the family for being fitness fanatics, this year, it ain’t no fun if the family can’t have some.

Those men who are known for being health conscious have an advantage when it comes to rallying the family together in the name of fun and fellowship. Someone in the family is secretly or admittedly inspired by the drive it takes to be consistent with a fitness routine. The Thanksgiving Day gathering is a perfect time to be a leader in wellness for the family and spread health with the ones who matter most.

For some people, fitness is not currently part of the routine or tradition. That’s OK because there is an advantage that comes with this position as well. This type of person is surprisingly effective in motivating other family members to try something new as well. Whether it’s the person who just isn’t into health or fitness or the family member who’s known for speaking out against all things sweaty; the more unexpected it is for them to be the one who calls for a family walk or exercise routine the better. The family will be shocked by the unlikely leader and they’ll say, “Well, if they can do it, so can I!” As we get to the middle of this autumn season, anyone can turn a new leaf and start to be successful in improving or maintaining their health and fitness. This month, in particular, nutrition should be on everyone’s mind with the upcoming Thanksgiving feast. Virtually everyone can mark their calendars for a huge bump in caloric intake on the fourth Thursday

of this month. Knowing this, make a plan to be modest and moderate for twenty-two days leading up to Thanksgiving.

The following are examples of simple whole-food meals that can help make some wiggle room for seconds on Thanksgiving: Breakfast: Oatmeal with fruit and eggs Non-fat Greek yogurt with cinnamon, fruit, nuts, and granola Lunch A. Fish, beef, or tofu taco bowl with lettuce, spinach, tomato, avocado, and a handful of tortilla chips with 2 tablespoons of salsa B.

Curry chicken, fish, or tofu salad with 1 serving of crackers

Dinner A. Protein pasta with chicken, shrimp, or veggie alfredo and a green salad B.

Honey garlic salmon or veggies with a half cup of brown rice and 2 cups of grilled veggies

Snacks A. A protein shake and a piece of fruit B.

Non-fat Greek yogurt with cinnamon, fruit, nuts, and granola

C.

One serving of protein trail mix

Be mindful that different foods have different effects on each person’s body depending on a number of factors such as lactose intolerance and allergens.

These examples show that healthy options don’t have to be complicated, but when they are planned ahead, the benefits are much more likely to produce the desired results. Use this meal plan example as a template to start today until Thanksgiving and after you finish your leftovers. Own it by customizing it and substituting the healthy options above for foods that you prefer and are

Disciplined fitness is the key to success this holiday season.

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[ OPINION ]

The right workout routine can add years to your life and overall happiness with yourself.

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[ MUSIC ] not allergic to.

Twenty-one days of clean eating leading up to the Thanksgiving Day feast will help reset energy levels, and hormones, and help you drop a few pounds. Hopefully, this is enough to balance out the damage done at the Thanksgiving dinner table.

In addition to nutrition, here are the fitness tools that will keep your heart and arteries happy, as well as help you feel good and strong in just three weeks. This year, Thanksgiving Day Turkey Trots will become a household staple that more families than ever participate in. A Turkey Trot is typically a 5k (3.1 miles) that is done on Thanksgiving Day. It’s an incentive to get out of bed and avoid the laziness that comes with waiting for the big meal to be ready.

dition addition is that virtually any age or ability can do it.

The 5k can be walked, jogged, run, or rolled. The most important thing is that families do it together and have fun with it! For all who may not feel fully prepared, here’s how to get ready. The following is a beginner walk/running program that has helped many personal training clients go from couch to 5k by following a manageable routine: 3 Week Couch to 5k Program Week 1: 3 walks/runs 1.

10 min (Start slowly and keep the same pace for all 10 min)

Add a Turkey Trot to the family itinerary this year and with the young ones along the young at heart can all participate in something physically active together, feel accomplished and productive, and create a core memory to cherish forever.

2.

10-15 min (Push the pace in the last 5 min)

3.

20 min (Easy and steady)

The part that makes the Turkey Trot the hottest new family tra-

3 walks/runs

Week 2:

1.

10–15 min (Easy and steady)

2.

15-20 min (Finish with three 20-second speed bursts)

3.

20 min (Walk or run further than last week’s 20-min run)

Week 3: 2 walks/runs + Turkey Trot!

1.

20-25 min

2.

20-25 min

3.

5k (3.1 miles) Thanksgiving Day Turkey Trot!

Athletic ability is not required to be successful with this program, only exceptional effort and dedication. Be sure to warm up before and stretch after each workout. Modify the times or the number of walks/runs per week to adjust to the current fitness level.

Let’s get social! Tag @garrettwaller_llc and @codemmagazine_ on Instagram and hashtag #CodeMTurkeyTrot in preparation for the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving Day! Let’s build the excitement for as many families as possible to run the race before they stuff their faces! ●

Maintaining healthy eating habits this holiday season will go a long way towards your 2024 fitness goals.

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[ HEALTH ]

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MUSIC [ MUSIC ]

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[ MUSIC ]

WHAT A BEAUTIFUL LIFE Hyatt Pete Escovedo celebrates his amazing 88 years of life by honoring his God-given talent by entertaining the world.

Written by ANTHONY KIRBY Anthony T. Kirby is the Lifestyle Editor for CODE M Magazine and has spent over 30 years in the menswear industry. He lives in Philadelphia, PA where he is the Creative Director for FINICKEY, an online men's haberdashery brand. (https:// finickey.us)

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[ MUSIC ]

M

ost people would feel lucky to do anything well for a long period of time. For 88-year-old Pete Escovedo, delighting audiences all over the world has become second nature.

Born in Pittsburg, CA, on July 13, 1935, he began his musical journey while attending high school in Oakland. At the age of sixteen, he began playing the saxophone and then discovered percussion, which became his love of rhythm and his dream of playing Latin Jazz music.

After performing with various bands, in 1960, Escovedo and his brothers, Coke and Phil Escovedo, formed the Escovedo Brothers Latin Jazz band and performed around the San Francisco Bay Area. In 1970 Escovedo and Coke formed the band Azteca that toured the US with Stevie Wonder and The Temptations.

They recorded two albums on Columbia Records, which are now considered collectors’ items, Azteca and Pyramid of the Moon.

In 1978 Escovedo and daughter Sheila E. recorded two albums on Fantasy Records Solo Two and Happy Together, which were

produced by Billy Cobham.

Peter has performed with his orchestra for President Obama twice at the White House.

As a solo artist, Escovedo has recorded 7 acclaimed albums on Concord Records: •

Yesterday’s Memories, Tomorrow’s Dreams – Live in Concert (1987)

•

Mister E (1988) – nominated for a Grammy.

•

Flying South (1996)

•

E - Street (1997)

•

E - Music (2000)

•

Pete Escovedo Live (2003)

•

Live From Stern Grove (2012)

Pete has also received numerous awards for: •

1983 Jammie Jazz Musician of the Year

•

1984 Bammie Latin Musician of the Year

•

1989 Grammy Nomination for Mister E

•

San Francisco State College Purple Globe Award

•

Ronald Dellums Congressional Award

•

National Recording Academy Governors Award San Francisco Chapter and Chicago Chapter

•

California Arts and Council Award

•

ABC Television Profile of Excellence Award

Has appeared in the following movies: •

Jack (1996)

•

Chasing Papi (2003)

Nightclubs: •

Escovedo’s - Oakland, CA

•

Mister E.’s - Berkeley, CA

•

Mr. E.’s Spotlight on the Square – Alameda, CA

•

Pete Escovedo’s Latin Jazz Club – San Jose, CA

Escovedo believes that there is healing through music and has

Pete Escovedo will perform in Pittsburgh at the Highmark Blues & Heritage Festival on November 4th.

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[ OPINION ]

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[ MUSIC ] donated his time to numerous charity events to help children around the world by teaching them the importance of music.

Today, Escovedo leads one of the top Latin Jazz Orchestras in the country performing his own unique sound and continues to deliver his music throughout the world.

“I’m beginning to wind down now and will stop traveling after this last trip,” Escovedo said. “Traveling is beginning to be a bit much for me, so I’ll perform closer to home going forward.”

Escovedo is performing in the Highmark Blues & Heritage Festival (HBHF) at the August Wilson African American Cultural Arts Center in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, on November 4.

Escovedo feels honored to have been able to play the music he loves for so long. Born to a musical family, Escovedo and his brothers would listen to his father and family play music around the house.

“When I was 16, I started to play music with my father,” Escovedo said. “After that, my brothers and I would play music anywhere; they’d let us play. That turned us into a band, and we started to get noticed around the community.”

And noticed they did. Escovedo and his brothers played music in the area until they got their first music deal. After that, the show hit the road to support their albums.

“This life has afforded me the opportunity to play with some amazing people,” Escovedo said.

Escovedo’s versatility as a Percussionist has been featured in performances and recordings by a wide range of artists such as Carlos Santana, Tito Puente, Herbie Hancock, Mongo Santamaria, Bobby McFerrin, Cal Tjader, Woody Herman, Stephen Stills, Billy Cobham, Anita Baker, George Duke, Boz Scaggs, Andy Narell, Al Jarreau, Ray Obiedo, Dionne Warwick, Marlena Shaw, Barry White, Angela Bofill, Arturo Sandoval, Poncho Sanchez, Chick Corea, Dave Valentine, Najee, Gerald Albright, Prince — and the list goes on.

“I have been blessed to have seen a lot and done a lot and I have loved every minute of it,” Escovedo said with a smile.

He might be starting to slow down, but he’ll never stop doing the thing that has brought him and his musical family so much joy.

Everyone should be so lucky to have the ability to do something so well, for so long at a high level.

Pete Escovedo is living a beautiful life and enjoying every minute of it. ●

Pete Escovedo is the father of Sheila E.

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[ MUSIC ]

OMARION COMES FULL CIRCLE R&B sensation Omarion takes the music industry by storm with his latest release, Full Circle, which takes listeners back to when music fed the soul.

F

ew artists can make waves in the music industry the way this R&B titan has. So, when they make their rare appearance, take note, or you might miss something spectacular. The global sensation rose to fame after his innate star power caught the eye of a music executive, who later recruited Omarion to be the face of the iconic boy band B2K.

As the lead singer of B2K, Omarion sparked a series of timeless 2000s chartbusters ("Uh Huh," "Bump, Bump, Bump," and "Girlfriend"). Despite their record-breaking success, they disbanded, opening the door for Omarion's multi-platinum, awardwinning solo career.

Omarion set the precedent with his critically acclaimed freshman album, O, which debuted at #1 on Billboard 200. One of the top album tracks in his unparalleled discography, "Touch" is still a top streamer today.

Beyond O and 21, Omarion has consistently fed the culture's sonic palate with follow-up albums Face Off, Ollusion, and Sex Playlist boasting quintessential radio favorites, including "Ice Box," "O," and the 6x platinum smash hit "Post to Be" featuring Chris Brown & Jhené Aiko. This year, Omarion returned with his two-part project entitled Full Circle. As Omarion geared up to release his next studio album, know that this era will be his most intentional.

There are two chapters of Full Circle, also known as Sonic Book One and Sonic Book Two. Full Circle: Sonic Book One debuted at #1 on iTunes R&B/ Soul Chart. The current single, “Serious” recently hit #1 on both iTunes and Amazon R&B/Soul Charts. This introspective project is an affirmation that Omarion is not just your traditional artist but rather an intensely spiritual individual aiming to connect with his audience on a deeper level through his transparency and overall vibrational energy.

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Written by JOHN O. HORTON JR. John O. Horton Jr, aka DJ Johnny O, is the President of the NerveDJs DJ Coalition, a coalition of over 9000+ DJs, Artists, Musicians, Producers and Label & Radio reps. Johnny O has been in the entertainment business for 46 years.

Both installments of Full Circle will feature 22 total tracks with vocal appearances from Sevyn Streeter, Amber Riley, BJRNCK, Rileyy Lanez, Nah Nah, and his brother O'Ryan. The robust #noskip project includes a medley of genres, ranging from bass-infused house tracks ("Bass'') to sultry, stripped-down piano ballad duets ("Waiting," featuring Amber Riley). It’s a glimpse into Omarion's current monologue of love, where he grapples with a yearning for a partner he knows is wrong for him ("BS") and basks in the euphoria of simply being attracted to someone (''Big Vibez").

When asked about the project, Omarion explained, "A lot of people will find a hot record, but there's a difference between wanting to create a 'hot recording' and being strategic about the music. This album, Full Circle, is the moment where I come back to my new self."

Last November, Omarion completed a philanthropic HBCU tour to share his book and meaningful solutions with students who are suffering from stress, anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts at alarming rates.

Most importantly, anticipate Omarion’s most authentic record to date, Full Circle.

Reflecting on his journey while creating the album, he teased, “There aren’t many artists who can inspire positivity. Not many people can invoke that feeling of, ‘I feel good’ or ‘I want to do something with this.’ Through this project, I’m inspiring people. This is that full-circle moment of me coming back to a place where there’s power in my vulnerability. That’s what my music means to me at this time.” ● Click below to listen to Omarion https://stem.ffm.to/fullcirlce

[ MUSIC ]

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FASHION

HAIR ABOVE THE REST Having an amazing hair style can be the difference between getting noticed and standing above the rest.

Written by LARON HARLEM

A wardrobe shopper, stylist, and accessories designer who specializes in dapper looks that truly appeal to the most discerning eye. mailto: styledbydecar-lo@gmail.com, https://www.styledbydecarlo.com/

Absalom Photo by Dlyfephotollc

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[ FASHION ]

Kylie Davis Styled and bowtie by Styled By Decarlo

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[ MUSIC ]

Dorian Cordice

Top by RALPH LAUREN

DJ Johnie O is the owner of Nerve DJ’s Mixtapes.

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64 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

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Cardigan by DIFFERENT NEW COOL bowtie by STYLED BY DECARLO shirt by OLD NAVY CODE M / NOVEMBER 2023 69

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Kylie Davis Photo by the late E37 PHOTOGRAPHY

70 NOVEMBER 2023 / CODE M

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