City Weekly March 28, 2024

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THE GAME IS AFOOT

What to expect from Real Salt Lake and the return of the Utah Royals in 2024.

12 CINEMA 23 MUSIC 11 A&E 17 DINING CITYWEEKLY.NET MARCH 28, 2024 — VOL. 40 N0. 44 CITY WEEKLY salt lake FREE
2 | MARCH 28, 2024 | CITY WEEKLY | | N EWS | A&E | DINING | CINEMA | MUSIC | | CITYWEEKLY.NET | 14 CITY WEEKLY STORE Find discounts to favorite restaurants, local retailers and concert venues at cwstore.cityweekly.net facebook.com/slcweekly Twitter: @cityweekly • Deals at cityweeklystore.com CITYWEEKLY.NET DINE Go to cityweekly.net for local restaurants serving you. SLC FORECAST Thursday 28 53°/39° PM rain Precipitation: 68% Friday 29 57°/46° Cloudy Precipitation: 24% Saturday 30 61°/46° Cloudy Precipitation: 23% Sunday 31 61°/42° Mostly cloudy Precipitation: 24% Monday 1 53°/36° Showers Precipitation: 45% Tuesday 2 56°/40° Mostly sunny Precipitation: 16% Wednesday 3 62°/43° Mostly sunny Precipitation: 10% SOURCE: WEATHER.COM CONTENTS CW salt lake Salt Lake City Weekly is published every Thursday by Copperfield Publishing Inc. We are an independent publication dedicated to alternative news and news sources, that also serves as a comprehensive entertainment guide. 16,000 copies of Salt Lake City Weekly are available free of charge at more than 1,000 locations along the Wasatch Front. Limit one copy per reader. Additional copies of the paper can be purchased for $1 (Best of Utah and other special issues, $5) payable to Salt Lake City Weekly in advance. No person, without expressed permission of Copperfield Publishing Inc., may take more than one copy of any Salt Lake City Weekly issue. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in whole or part by any means, including electronic retrieval systems, without the written permission of the publisher. Third-class postage paid at Midvale, UT. Delivery might take up to one full week. All rights reserved. Phone 801-654-1393 | Email comments@cityweekly.net Office address : 75 E. 400 South, Ste. 204, Salt Lake City, UT 84111 PRINTED ON RECYCLED PAPER STAFF All Contents © 2024 City Weekly is Registered with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office Copperfield Publishing Inc. | John Saltas, City Weekly founder Publisher PETE SALTAS News Editor BENJAMIN WOOD Arts & Entertainment Editor SCOTT RENSHAW Contributing Editor JERRE WROBLE Music Editor EMILEE ATKINSON Listings Desk WES LONG Executive Editor and Founder JOHN SALTAS Circulation Manager ERIC GRANATO Associate Business Manager PAULA SALTAS Technical Director BRYAN MANNOS Developer BRYAN BALE Senior Account Executive DOUG KRUITHOF Account Executives KELLY BOYCE, KAYLA DREHER, KRISTA MAGGARD D isplay Advertising 801-654-1393 National Advertising VMG Advertising | 888-278-9866 Editorial Contributors KATHARINE BIELE, ROB BREZSNY, S OPHIE CALIGIURI, MARK DAGO, JOSI HINDS, MIKE RIEDEL, ARICA ROBERTS, CONNOR SANDERS, ALEX SPRINGER, BRYAN YOUNG, LEE ZIMMERMAN Graphic Artists SOFIA CIFUENTES, CHELSEA NEIDER Cover Story The Game Is Afoot What to expect from Real Salt Lake and the return of the Utah Royals in 2024. By Connor Sanders Cover photo courtesy of Utah Royals 6 PRIVATE EYE 10 A&E 12 CINEMA 13 NE WS 17 DINE 2 2 C W REWIND 23 MUSIC 29 C OMMUNITY GET YOUR GEAR REPAIRED OR THAT UPGRADE YOU NEED WITH OUR GEAR EXCHANGE PROGRAM. ANYTHING YOU NEED TO GET OUT THERE, SKI TRUCKS CAN HELP MAKE IT HAPPEN! ALPINE / NORDIC / SNOWBOARDING / APPAREL & ACCESSORIES DROP IN AT 1260 WEST NORTH TEMPLE, SLC UT SKITRUCKS.COM / 801-595-0919 / SERVICE@SKITRUCKS.COM ARE YOU READY FOR ANOTHER EPIC SKI SEASON?!
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MAGA Hate

Various anti-hate campaigns in the media today fail to mention the biggest hate movement of all—the one currently sponsored by far-right Republicans against Democrats.

Republicans have incited hate crimes against Democrats’ offices in Congress and private homes in California, and they’ve encouraged hate against judges and election workers. Do Republicans really get a free pass to hate just because many go to evangelical churches and many Democrats go elsewhere?

In Utah, Senate candidate Brad Wilson has a TV ad where he promises to “risk it all” and fires a rifle as he talks about “fighting” Joe Biden. In another ad, he takes a sledgehammer to cinder blocks representing Biden’s agenda, which he claims is “destroying” the country’s foundations. This is outrageous incitement to violence against Democrats.

Wilson’s MAGA party is doing plenty of the destroying, however, if you count honesty, nonviolence and separation of powers as part of that foundation. MAGA candidates in this election cycle need to be held accountable for both religious and political hate speech before their partisans actualize their candidates’ violent fantasies.

Woods Cross

“Keep On the Silverside,” March 14 Dining Review

“Tried [Silverside Deil] for the first time last week. Everything was incredible.”

GEITA501

Via Instagram

Sandwich shops are a dime a dozen. You have to have something that blows the others out of the water. And better be consistent. Nothing worse than finding a place that has great food, and you go back and order the same thing and you are disappointed. A bad cook can destroy your business if you are not on top of your business.

PATRICIA GOURDIN

Via Facebook

“Radio Blah Blah,” March 7 Small Lake City

Hear, hear! It is the absolute truth! Talk about a bunch of Froot Loop nutcases! It actually makes me sick to my stomach to think of the damage [syndicated talk radio] might do to those who are not educated or very world wise!

Via Facebook R.I.N.O.s

A known political derogatory today, “Republican in Name Only” a party in disarray. A GOP divided as both sides claim the same name, So let’s review the “old” and “new” and who can proclaim.

The “old” traditional party of democracy, With “platforms” and support for a strong military. The defender of freedom for all nations, With a “laissez-faire” doctrine for all creation.

The “new” radical MAGA tribe of autocracy, With no “platforms” and disdain of our military. Their “orange Jesus” ignores Ukraine’s misery, A conspiracy and alt-facts dictatorship scary!

So which Republican side is R.I.N.O. and which is not? Freedom, “If we can keep it”, dependent on their lot!

THE WATER COOLER

What are you starting to appreciate more as you get older?

Scott Renshaw

That there are things I wish I appreciated more before I got older ...

Eric Granato

Not caring what people think.

Wes Long

How hard the people around me are trying to do right in their lives. Conversely, I am also appreciating how little some of us ever really “grow up.” I suspect I fall within both of these categories.

Krista Maggard

Staying in and getting quality sleep!

Tom Metos

Senior discounts at Hardee’s.

Mike Ptaschinski

Even though I survived getting attacked by two unvaccinated pit bulls and the follow-up rabies shots, I am even more grateful that the Kushners have yet to bail out The Donald with the $2B they made in their deal with the Saudis.

Katharine Biele

Family. Just that.

Eleni Saltas

My mother.

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PRIVATE

14 More Assists

The lead story on the Deseret News home page the past two days was headlined, “John Stockton Wants You to Leave Him Alone.” That’s all well and good. Stockton is certainly entitled to be left alone in his privacy and to share his time only with family and close friends.

But if that’s the case, why would he have agreed to what is fast becoming a controversial interview and story with the Deseret News?

The lengthy article—which I was happy to see because I’m a fan of lengthy articles chock full of useful, factual news—was not written by any among the gaggle of fine sports writers that the Deseret News has long produced. Instead, it was written by the paper’s national political correspondent, Samuel Benson.

I’m fine with that, too, even though Benson looks like he’s not old enough to have any memories of Stockton sending one of his NBA record number of assists to the likes of David Benoit and Jose Ortiz. So right off the top, a reader should know this particular article would not be one more maudlin piece about heroes gone by. Start to finish, Benson’s story is a political one.

Which is fine, since John Stockton has been plenty political since 2020 when then-President Donald Trump fully bungled the national COVID-19 response and set our country tumbling into the kind of mind-messing mayhem that follows him wherever he goes. In a quick summary, Stockton was an anti-vaxxer before being anti-vax became a political litmus test between left and right or blue and red. In many corners, it also became the demarcation between very stupid people and very smart people. Naturally, each

side took the position that they were the smart ones.

I appreciate the 22 years of joy that Stockton brought to basketball fans worldwide. Thanks, John—and sorry that one of the few times you ever gave a kid an autograph, it was to my kid (at St. Vincent’s parish) on a basketball that he immediately smudged off playing hoops in the driveway.

I appreciate that Stockton is entitled to his opinions. No problem, John. I can separate the jock from the jackass, same as he formerly separated my wallet dollars from my trousers. But his statements beg for public scrutiny. A basketball court has boundaries, same as truth and lies.

Benson’s story details how the once-shy gym rat emerged 20 years out of his NBA retirement to become not only an outspoken medical activist (Spoiler alert: The chiropractor did it!) but also by some twist of cosmic malfunction to be mentioned as a potential vice-presidential candidate for Robert F. Kennedy Jr.

In the piece, Benson asks Stockton about claims that people—especially high-profile, superbly fit athletes— were falling over dead all over the place after getting the COVID-19 vaccination. Here’s how that exchange went, per the Benson article:

“That research led Stockton to other conclusions, many of which were disputed by public health officials. He claimed vaccines were not a safe or effective way to protect against the virus. In January 2022, he alleged over 100 professional athletes had been killed by the COVID-19 vaccines. By December of 2022, he asserted it was over 300. He told me it was now ‘well over 1,000.’

“People say, ‘well, you’re making it up,’” he said. ‘Well, we’ve got a list.’

“When I asked where I could find the list, he explained that someone had sent it to him, and he hadn’t looked at it in some time. I followed up, asking where I could find it.

“He shrugged his shoulders. ‘I don’t know what to tell you.’”

Ye gads, folks! What could go wrong if the most advanced country on earth was led by two people who believe research is defined as dumpster diving into obscure corners of the internet to locate the perfect idiotic meme validation?

Or by reading the late-night email ramblings of a bevy of anonymous sorts, dating back to the fine tradition of such other medical minds as Jack the Ripper? How glorious it must be to be able to define your own rules of medicine simply because you didn’t die and someone else did, then crediting it to research, not what it actually was—luck?

Or perhaps it’s so simple as making shit up? Oh wait, we did that from 2016 to 2020, but I digress.

I really don’t care a whit if Stockton decides not to expose his own family to a medical treatment or vaccine. I don’t care if he pours ivermectin atop their Cheerios each morning. I don’t care if the bleach he uses to whiten his gym shorts does double duty as body cleanser. I don’t fret illness. I fret ignorance masking as bravado.

I also don’t fret being found to be wrong.

So, John, I’ll come up to Spokane. We will sit in the bar your pop worked so hard and long in, Jack and Dan’s. I’ll get you a beer and a bag of pork rinds. I’ll hand you a piece of paper. Then you hand me your piece of paper.

Yours will list the 1,000 or 300 or 100 professional athletes who fell over dead after their COVID-19 shots. My list will be the names of the 14 family members, business associates and friends who actually did die from contracting COVID-19. In other words, back your science with facts, not bum rush “research.”

Produce the list and this newspaper will print every name, give voice to your cause and buff shine your Delta Center statue. Don’t produce the list, then, just man up since you’ve now stepped out of bounds.

Until then, I’ll simply add 14 more “assists” to his career record of 15,860 when he quietly retired from the game and became a not-so-quiet medical authority. His assist total now is 15,874. CW

Send comments to john@cityweekly.net

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HITS & MISSES

MISS: Pour One Out

Religion is in the news this week and not just because of the Easter season. Here in Utah, it’s the juxtaposition of religion and liquor in the law. A sweet little Forty Three Bakery in Poplar Grove won’t be getting a liquor license anytime soon. Utah has an antiquated proximity law requiring anything with liquor to be 200 or 300 feet (depending on how you measure) from churches, schools and other community locations. The jury’s out on how the Legislature came up with the measurements, but there they are. Owner Andrew Corrao told The Salt Lake Tribune that he’d planned to create a welcoming neighborhood dining spot to bring customers to the west side. These liquor laws caused the demise of longtime favorite Cinegrill in 2016 after it had the misfortune of locating next to a place of worship—you know, that held services on Sundays. There are no exceptions to the draconian rule—even if a school or church signs off. There must be something to the lure of liquor within 200 feet.

MISS: True Believers

Good God, the Legislature is dancing around the practice of religion as if it’s somehow being challenged. The Religious Freedom Restoration Act of 1993 has been a bouncing ball of legislation and constitutionality, focused on such fun things as peyote and what the owners of Hobby Lobby can do. It comes with a balancing act that requires laws to serve a compelling state interest to avoid being undermined by religious exemptions. But that’s not the whole story. The governor has signed a just-in-case law that would extend RFRA to state and local communities. Everybody seems on board— not the least of whom is former Sen. Steve Urquhart, whose spiritual journey has taken him to the psychedelic Divine Assembly and its mushroom sacrament. “This gives robust protection to psychedelic worship. Interfering with psychedelic worship now will legally be the same as interfering with a Mormon temple ceremony,” he said. Be ready, though, for some confusion and misinterpretation.

HIT: Spring Cleaning

Yes, we let the feds in—with money. Doug Emhoff, Second Gentleman of the United States, visited Utah to announce $3.4 billion in infrastructure and energy investments. Of that, $580 million will go to the state’s water infrastructure. City Creek Canyon Water Treatment facility will get $36 million to rebuild and retrofit. There’s also a low-interest loan and other initiatives to make sure pipes aren’t spreading lead contamination. That means underserved areas, specifically Salt Lake’s west side, will have their lead service lines replaced. But it’s not all about replacing pipes. The administration got an up-front view of the crisis with the Great Salt Lake. CW

No Parking

Two of my favorite parks in Salt Lake City are Guadalupe Park and Jackson Park. Both are located on 500 North, with Guadalupe at 600 West and Jackson roughly 300 yards away on Grant Street.

I visit them when I’m out jogging with my dogs. Guadalupe has an art piece depicting the neighborhood’s namesake and Jackson has a blend of open space and walking paths. I first stumbled upon Jackson during the pandemic, when several streets—including 500 North—were closed to through-traffic to open up public space for people to get outside.

That program, called “Stay Safe Stay Active,” was great. It cost nearly nothing to implement and prevented exactly no one from getting anywhere they needed to go. It would take little effort to resume but there’s been nary a whisper on that front, nor on the Vision Zero pedestrian safety effort that Mayor Erin Mendenhall announced more than a year ago.

But I digress. Visiting both Jackson and Guadalupe Parks in a single trip is challenging. A straight line between them would probably make for a Par 4 on a golf course, but the colossal imposition of Interstate 15 requires a 1-mile detour to 300 North, the closest freeway underpass. Going over the 600 North bridge actually adds another half-mile due to the railroad, and you’re as likely as not to die in traffic if you go that way. The practical reality is that very few people go from Guadalupe Park to Jackson Park. If they did, you can bet your ass they’re driving.

It could have been built differently—further west, with fewer lanes and fewer interchanges or, since that notion is anathema to suburban motorists, with considerably more underpasses and bridges, integrated transit lines and a modicum of thought given to surrounding communities. But even when there’s an attempt to improve things, fixes tend to get shouted down.

Two opportunities are about to pass Salt Lakers by. First, the Utah Department of Transportation offered to punch a hole in the freeway berm between Guadalupe and Jackson Parks, but a vocal cohort of neighbors (particularly the handful who attend community council meetings) are fighting it tooth and nail. UDOT’s response has generally been “fine, why bother trying?” and it’s hard to blame them.

Second, the city is gearing up to rebuild 600 North and has abandoned plans for a beautiful tree-lined boulevard in favor of sticking with a 5-lane surface highway. City documents noted that traffic levels don’t justify so many lanes and surveys showed support for reducing car space—but some folks were upset, for the usual reasons.

In government, there’s a strong gravitational pull toward the status quo and unfortunately, pessimists are louder than optimists. Put another way, it takes 100 dog-walkers who want to visit a park to carry the weight of a single freeway driver. And yet, because of the freeway, the dog-walkers might not even realize how close the parks actually are. CW

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Organic Unintelligence

A creator implores others not to treat something created from others’ work as worth anyone’s time.

AIart is bad. And you should feel bad for sharing it.

I don’t mean to make you feel bad if you are the sort of person who will share it— but maybe I actually do. I’m happy to explain why you shouldn’t do it. And at the end, if you still feel like doing it, it’s on your conscience, not mine.

First off, let’s say that the term “artificial intelligence” is not really accurate when it comes to the sort of things image generators like Midjourney or engines like ChatGPT can do. They aren’t actually an “intelligence,” but merely learning machines. These machines take in mountains of input, then use an algorithm to evaluate whatever keywords you input, mix all of its data together, and then spit out something that resembles what you asked for. It’s not creating something artistically; it’s taking an average of everything it’s seen before based on your keywords, and mashing it together. It’s not art. It’s more of a novelty—and not a good one.

The biggest problem with this method (among many) is that the tech companies have built their AI--whether text-only or visual--on stolen work. There was no pay-

ment made, or permission given, to any of the artists whose work were fed into this machine, and it is undercutting their livelihood. Is it ethical to forego paying an artist by using a machine that has stolen their work? No. Even if it’s just for a joke or a meme.

You have artists in your life, and every time you share one of these AI-generated monstrosities, you are telling them implicitly that you don’t value them or their work. You don’t value the time it took them to learn their trade. You don’t want them to make a living.

It is hard enough to earn your way by making art. Our society has devalued it to the point where it’s a struggle where you’re expected to sacrifice your life and well-being in order to have a chance to ply your trade. By stealing the art and words of artists, putting them into a machine and then taking those images, it is a clear message to those of us who make art that you want things to be even harder for us. You would have to believe that art has value to you—because you obviously need and want it in your life, even just by pressing share on a social media post—but you don’t feel like it’s worth enough to pay for it in some way. Accordingly, that means you don’t think we should be paid.

My question is: Why? Why shouldn’t writers and artists be paid for their work? Why would it be okay for these tech companies to steal the work of tens of thousands of artists, and then charge to amalgamate it and spit something else out? And why would it be okay for you to share that stolen work?

If there were a museum, filled with paintings stolen from other museums, I feel like you probably wouldn’t feel good about buying a ticket to that museum. Would you feel good about going to a free

art gallery, taking pictures of all of the for-sale art on the walls, and then printing your own copies for home? Or would you buy the original—or even a print—for your own enjoyment?

It seems as though we all know, innately, that stealing the work of someone else is wrong, especially in the context of the capitalist hellscape that we live in. But why is there still such a disconnect when it comes to AI art? Why do some folks feel like it’s okay to share and disseminate?

I think part of it, for some, is entitlement. They think they should be able to take what they want, regardless of whom

it hurts. For others, they must just be oblivious to the damage they’re doing. But now you know. You know that it is wrong and unethical to share that stuff, and even sharing it tells your artist friends you don’t value them. And I know you do value us.

So… knock it off. Don’t share AI art. Don’t generate it. Don’t even bother. Your time would be better spent learning how to make the art yourself. And if you can’t do it yourself, don’t hesitate to pay someone else to do it. Put simply, it’s the right thing to do. CW

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JASON WONG A&E Big Shiny Robot

ESSENTIALS

Pioneer Theatre Company: The Lehman Trilogy

Sometimes, a business’s name feels like something separated from the real world, a signifier that just becomes part of the cultural atmosphere. When the investment firm Lehman Brothers collapsed as part of the 2008 financial crisis, it’s understandable that few people were considering the legacy of the actual Lehman Brothers who founded the company, and what that narrative says about the history of capitalism in America from the Gilded Age to the present.

Ben Power adapted Italian writer Stefano Massini’s The Lehman Trilogy, a three-act (and three-actor) play that tracks the origins of the company with the arrival of Bavarian immigrant Henry Lehman in the United States in 1844, opening his first store in Alabama. He was eventually joined in the country by brothers Mayer and Emanuel, eventually creating the financial powerhouse that seemed like one of those “too big to fail” entities—until it did. Cast members Jeff Talbott, Seth Andrew Bridges and William Connell portray the original Lehmann brothers, as well as their direct descendants and every other character in the play, as it tracks the evolution of Lehman Brothers across the decades.

In addition to being the debut of The Lehman Trilogy in Utah, Pioneer Theatre Company’s production marks the debut of the new 380-seat Meldrum Theatre at Einar Nielsen Fieldhouse. The venue allows for more intimate staging of shows for which that’s the appropriate creative choice—but it also means tickets are more limited. The production runs March 29 – April 13, with tickets beginning at $42. Visit pioneertheatre.org for tickets and additional event information (SR)

Jurassic Quest

In the nearly 30-plus years since  Jurassic Park became a cinematic blockbuster, dinosaurs have only continued to grow more compelling in the public imagination. They seem like things from another world, even though they were once part of ours. And thanks to an exciting touring attraction, it can feel like that again.

Jurassic Quest is a largescale event that feels like a touring dinosaur-themed amusement park, with walkthrough exhibits showcasing the Cretaceous, Jurassic and Triassic eras. But the real stars of the interactive event are more than 100 life-size recreations of those eras’ giant historical occupants, all of them painstakingly designed and brought to moving, sound-making life. Guests get a chance to dig up fossils, experience a dinosaur play area, participate in science and art activities, get their faces painted, take rides on their favorite life-size dinosaurs and even have close-up encounters with puppeteered baby dinosaurs; a “Triceratots” soft-play area is available for the youngest dino-lovers. There really isn’t anything like it in terms of the chance for youngsters—and perhaps also their young-at-heart caretakers—to get up close and personal with the mammoth beasts that ruled the earth 60 million years ago.

Jurassic Quest brings the prehistoric world to the Mountain America Expo Center (9575 S. State, Sandy) March 29 (noon – 8 p.m.), 30 (9 a.m. – 8 p.m.) and 31 (9 a.m. – 7 p.m.). Tickets are $19 - $36, including general admission; and kids’ allyou-can-ride options; while door purchases are available, advance purchase is recommended. Visit jurassicquest.com for tickets and additional event information. (SR)

Pretty Woman: The Musical

Movies become iconic for a wide variety of reasons. Some achieve fame for the way they became part of the cultural conversation; others resonate through the years by virtue of introducing technological innovations. And then there are those that are well-known because they became the launching pad for one of its actors—movies that served notice Hollywood had added a star to its firmament. Such was the case with Pretty Woman, the 1990 romantic comedy that catapulted then23-year-old Julia Roberts to A-list status—despite the fact that she only got the role after other actors including Molly Ringwald and Meg Ryan turned it down first. Such a star-driven success would seem like a challenge to adapt into a stage musical, but original screenwriter J. F. Lawton and director Garry Marshall took up the challenge when they began working on the book in 2014, with work continuing after Marshall’s passing in 2016. For the music, they turned to hitmakers of the movie’s original era: singer Bryan Adams and his longtime songwriting partner Jim Vallance (“Summer of ’69,” “Heaven”). They wisely stuck to the now-beloved story of a Hollywood streetwalker named Vivian who gets an unexpected look at another life when she’s “rented” for a week as personal escort for wealthy businessman Edward. Broadway at the Eccles’ touring presentation of Pretty Woman visits the Eccles Theatre (131 S. Main St.) April 2 – 7 for eight performances only, including matinee performances on April 6 and April 7. Tickets are $52.50 - $149; visit arttix.org to purchase tickets and for additional event information. (SR)

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CINEMA

God Save the King

Modern versions of kaiju movies miss the point of what turned them into legends.

It probably sounds like a kind of self-mythology for a film critic to suggest that some of the first movies he fell in love with as a kid were foreign films. In this case, however, it’s the truth—because the films in question were the English-dubbed versions of Japanese kaiju adventures, beginning with Godzilla.

A lot of things were different about the world where I grew up, in 1970s suburban California, long before the internet, streaming services or even video stores placed near-infinite viewing choices in easy reach. My family was an early adapter to cable television, largely so that we could get the independent Los Angeles stations after our move to Bakersfield. Those stations filled their broadcast hours with local Southern California sports teams, reruns of TV shows like I Love Lucy and The Twilight Zone … and plenty of old movies.

Most of those old movies held little interest for a grade-schooler, but the kaiju movies—Godzilla, Gamera, Ghidorah, Mothra and the like—were perfect fodder for a budding nerd. Yes, they were filled with leveled cityscapes, but even at that age I could tell that the cityscapes were scale models. They were great cheesy fun, and at their best when they set two or more of the monsters in opposition, like my personal favorite, Destroy All Monsters. I understood nothing about the allegories for

nese culture, but I fluently spoke the language of people in big rubber suits going smashy-smashy. Before Star Wars, before comic books, before any other media, the Toho kaiju were my gateway drug to loving fantasy spectacle.

You’ll understand, then, if I feel somewhat possessive about what has happened to Godzilla over the years. Even in childhood, I immediately rejected stuff like the Hanna-Barbera animated Godzilla series that introduced the bumbling Godzooky, and I later approached with intense skepticism the attempt by Hollywood to appropriate the character, beginning with Roland Emmerich’s 1998 feature. I’ve rarely returned to re-watching the big-rubbersuit movies of my childhood, but they’ve always been in my heart. And these newer movies were … something else.

It took the release of Godzilla Minus One last year for me fully to latch on to what that something else was. Decades had passed since I was a kid binge-watching monster movies on a 14” TV screen, but I recognized immediately that thing I loved. Those circa-1960s movies were spectacles, and they were disaster movies, but they were safely silly; like a roller-coaster, they allowed you to experience danger in a way that was non-threatening. It’s not that Godzilla Minus One wasn’t also a solid piece of storytelling, because it did work on that level as a narrative about the futility of Japan’s own particular World War II-era culture of war. The action, however, was a deft mix of modern technology and an aesthetic that made Godzilla, that atomic force of nature, still feel like a guy in a rubber suit.

This week marks the release of Godzilla X Kong: The New Empire—a continuation of a franchise reboot that has been going on for a decade now, since Gareth Edwards’ 2014 Godzilla, and has folded King Kong into its universe. Some of these movies have been okay, some of them not-sookay, and some of them actively terrible, but all of them have operated on the same

misguided principle that the way to make Godzilla appealing in the 21st century is to make the monster’s world more real. That notion could apply to the trauma experienced by the characters, or to the physical devastation of the locations where the monsters get crazy, or to the look of the creatures themselves. CGI has given birth to a default assumption that what audiences want is hyper-realism, for the visual effects to render a physical world indistinguishable from our own. And that feels like it misses the point of the kaiju movies

entirely—that they’re set in our world, but only a scale model version of that world built specifically to be trampled by people in rubber suits.

As of press time, I’ve not yet seen Godzilla X Kong, and I always hope for the best when approaching any as-yet-unseen movie. I worry, though, that this Godzilla will continue to not be my Godzilla, the Godzilla whose distinctive sing-song roar has lived rent-free in my head for nearly 50 years. I don’t need that Godzilla to be real in order to be special. CW

MARCH 28, 2024 | 12 | CITYWEEKLY.NET | | M USIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS | | CITY WEEKLY |
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Washington Square Dispatch

SLC Council approves U baseball lease of Sunnyside park; limits public comment under fire from residents.

The Salt Lake City Council convened on the evening of March 5 to recognize Women’s History Month as well as to announce changes to the council’s general comment policies. The council also approved the leasing of a section of Sunnyside Park to the University of Utah for a new baseball stadium. Councilmember Darin Mano was absent.

Women’s History Month

The council voted to adopt a joint ceremonial resolution with Salt Lake City Mayor Erin Mendenhall to recognize March as National Women’s History Month in Salt Lake City, with this year’s theme of “Celebrating Women’s Contributions to Equity and Inclusion.”

“Salt Lake City acknowledges the indispensable role that women have played in shaping the cultural, economic and social fabric of our community,” Councilmember Sarah Young read from the resolution.

General Comment Policy

The council voted unanimously to adopt a resolution amending policies for public comment at its meetings. The new amendment limits the portion of council meetings dedicated to general comments to one hour and limits individual speakers to no more than two minutes. This change does not impact comment on items specifically included on a meeting’s agenda.

“Today we’re updating our general comment policy to preserve our ability to effectively conduct city business and maintain a safe and welcoming public forum for all constituents,” Councilmember Chris Wharton said.

The council discussed this change during a work session on March 5. In that discussion, councilmembers emphasized the need to keep public comment safe for all viewpoints while also allocating city resources effectively.

In adopting this resolution, the council also moved to allow that comments in the form of recorded videos be submitted to the council.

“I’ll note that with our city council meetings, they do cost money, and they do cost taxpayer dollars,” Wharton said. He added that he has personally received statements from constituents explaining they’ve felt unsafe to comment at recent meetings and that they don’t support their tax dollars going to never-ending city council meetings.

Wharton and the rest of the council were met with angry yells from the audience. Wharton then called for a recess.

The vote on the changes and this dis-

ruption to council proceedings come after a string of city council meetings in which groups of pro-Palestine constituents have used the general comment period to call for a ceasefire resolution regarding the conflict in Gaza. In the previous Feb. 20 city council meeting, general comment ran for roughly three hours before Councilmember Alejandro Puy adjourned the meeting before all those wishing to speak had done so.

After Tuesday’s meeting resumed, Wharton later attempted to readjourn over an audience member’s reading of a poem they had started while the council was still in recess. And after several requests to stop the disruption, Wharton asked security to clear the room of people and took the general comments portion of the meeting off the agenda.

University of Utah Baseball

The council voted unanimously to adopt a resolution authorizing a 99-year ground lease to the University of Utah for a roughly 1-acre section of Sunnyside Park. The U plans to use this land in the construction of a new baseball stadium. The leased land includes portions of one softball field and one multi-use field that will be lost in this development.

In exchange for this lease, the U will be committing $4.2 million to Sunnyside Park for improvements and maintenance. In their adoption of this resolution, the council also outlined a set of terms for this lease. Some of these conditions include making the stadium available for rent when not in use, permitting public ac-

cess to the leased land when not in use and constructing restrooms that will be available for public use during park hours when the stadium is not reserved for events.

The complete set of terms is included in the council’s motion sheet for this item, which can be found with the council meeting agenda available through the Salt Lake City government website.

“I want to thank all who engaged, who examined and made comments on this project,” said District 6 Councilmember Dan Dugan, who represents the Sunnyside area. He added that he was looking forward to the process of engaging with the community to see how the public wants the $4.2 million to be used in the park.

New Historic District

The council voted unanimously to establish the Yalecrest-Laird Heights Local Historical District after holding a public hearing on the ordinance. In these districts, demolitions and exterior changes to buildings are subject to review “to ensure that changes to historic properties are compatible with the site’s historic architecture,” as explained on slc.gov.

The council also adopted an amendment to the Landscaping and Buffers chapter of the Salt Lake City Code. This amendment, among other things, requires water-wise and drought-tolerant landscaping, limits the amount of rock ground cover allowed in yards and bans the use of artificial turf in landscaping. CW

MARCH 28, 2024 | 13 | CITYWEEKLY.NET | | M USIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS | | CITY WEEKLY |
Visit cityweekly.net for additional dispatches from Salt Lake City Council meetings.
NEWS

THE GAME IS AFOOT

What to expect from Real Salt Lake and the return of the Utah Royals in 2024.

Professional soccer season is back in the Beehive State, and for the first time since 2020, Real Salt Lake isn’t the only team in town.

March 16 marked the return of the Utah Royals, a second attempt at an expansion team in the National Women’s Soccer League. With RSL having one of the youngest squads in all of Major League Soccer and the Royals sporting a debut squad full of hometown heroes, there’s a lot to be excited about.

THE RETURN OF ROYALTY

After a two-season hiatus (and the club being acquired by Lindsey Vonn, Ryan Smith and David Blitzer), the Royals are back in action for the 2024 season. Like so many Utah sports teams before them, the OG Royals were strikingly mediocre in past seasons, finishing dead in the middle of the standings in both 2018 and 2019.

Previous ownership shut the team down in the wake of NWSL’s pandemiccanceled 2020 season and allowed the Kansas City Current to take control of the roster. Now, league expansion has made the going a bit tougher than what the Becky Sauerbrunn and Christen Press-led team faced in 2018.

A key holdover from that era is club alltime leading scorer Amy Rodriguez, who will serve as head coach. Rodriguez was a fixture on the U.S. teams that dominated the World Cup and Olympics of the early 2010s. She should have buy-in from Day 1. If the squad forms an identity close to what RSL has built, expect a hardworking, organized team that is solid on defense. The Royals picked up their first win of the new era in a 2-1 rockfight on the road against North Carolina Courage on March 21 after falling 2-0 in the season opener against the Chicago Red Stars on March 16.

KEY PLAYERS

Mikayla Cluff, MF

Hometown: Kaysville, Utah

Previous team: Orlando Pride

Cluff is a Brigham Young University legend who romped through opponents en route to the 2021 NCAA National Championship game. She notched 4 goals and 1 assist across her first two professional seasons in Orlando. Rodriguez may hand Cluff the keys to the middle of the park from the start, though there are other intriguing midfield options on the roster in Frankie Tagliaferri and Emily Gray.

Ifeoma (Ify) Onumonu, FW

Hometown: Rancho Cucamonga, California

Previous team: NJ/NY Gotham FC

Onumonu joins from the 2023 NWSL champions, where she was named to the Best XI second team after registering 8 goals and 4 assists in 2021. The Nigerian international played in all four of the Super Eagles’ World Cup matches in 2023.

Kaleigh Riehl, CB

Hometown: Fairfax Station, Virginia

Previous team: San Diego Wave

This is the third time Riehl has been drafted to an expansion team, so she brings an element of experience that is valuable. It’s surprising that the Wave let

her go after she helped to lead the team to the best regular season record in the NWSL. A nice player to build the defense around.

KEY HOME MATCHES

Saturday, May 25: vs. Kansas City Current. Playing our former roster + RSL’s longstanding beef with Sporting KC should set up for a nice rivalry with the Current.

Friday, Aug. 23: vs. Bay FC. A chance to measure up against the other 2024 expansion team.

Friday, Nov. 1: vs. NJ/NY Gotham FC. Can the reigning champs do it on a snowy night in Sandy?

NWSL matches are streamed on numerous platforms including ESPN+, Paramount+, Prime Video and the league’s own streaming service NWSL+.

THE REAL DEAL

Over on the men’s side, there’s been a ton of turnover at the club since Real Salt Lake were knocked out of the 2023 playoffs in a penalty shootout loss to the Houston Dynamo.

Kurt Schmid has replaced Elliott Fall as chief soccer officer. MLS.com’s Matt Doyle notes this is sort of weird because Fall led RSL to the playoffs last season and made the club’s record signing of Cristian “Chicho” Arango last summer.

The team also kept Pablo Mastroeni on as head coach, but replaced all of his assistants. What can you really make of that?

The roster seems to be in decent enough shape, even after club captain Damir Kreilach left for the Vancouver Whitecaps and the front office sold hotand-cold winger Jefferson Savarino to Brazil in the offseason.

That has opened up two big salary slots that are still unfilled, though the club did bring in English lower-league legend Matt Crooks, who has started the season strong.

The long and short of it is that RSL has one of the youngest rosters in all of MLS.

The players play hard for Mastroeni.

Somehow, this team always seems to add up to more than the sum of its parts. Can they do it again this year?

So far, it’s been up and down. The Claret and Cobalt got sauced up by the G.O.A.T. Lionel Messi on the way to a 2-0 loss to open the season on Feb. 21 and drew against St. Louis City SC three days later. They bounced back in a big way with a snow-covered 3-0 drubbing of Los Angeles FC in the home opener March 2.

The momentum appears to have stopped, however, as RSL fell 2-1 at home to rivals Colorado Rapids on March 9. A 2-1 win over the Vancouver Whitecaps on March 23 has RSL sitting in 5th early on in the Western Conference race.

14 | MARCH 28, 2024 | CITY WEEKLY | | N EWS | A&E | DINING | CINEMA | MUSIC | | CITYWEEKLY.NET |
COURTESY PHOTO
The Utah Royals are back in action after a cancelled season, ownership change and a move out of state.

KEY PLAYERS

Diego Luna, MF/FW

This is a huge season for Luna as he works to earn a spot on the U-23 roster for the Paris Olympics. Luna is as exciting a player as there is in MLS, and he was rewarded with a call up to the U.S. Men’s National Team in January. He had a hot finish to the 2023 season and has already notched three assists in 2024.

It seems like Crooks will take most of the minutes at the 10, so Luna will have to cook inverting from the left wing. He’s probably the biggest swing player for the team this season, especially since the other key distributor, Pablo Ruiz, is out for the season with an injury.

Cristian “Chicho” Arango, ST

Given that RSL plays a fairly bunkered down style, goals really come at a premium on this team. That puts a lot of pressure on the Colombian 28-year-old Arango, who was named captain before the season.

Arango appears to have a calming presence, and there also wasn’t the same zip to the team when he was out injured last season. They need a big year from him to make noise in the playoffs.

Alexandros Katranis, LB

Projecting how a 25-year-old from 14thplaced Poland will do in MLS is never easy, but Real Salt Lake has been desperate for creativity from its fullbacks. Andrew Brody and Bode Hidalgo are fine players for Homegrown guys, but the modern game asks for more punch during build-up than what they’ve shown. It’s not like the team will sink if Katrantis isn’t the MLS equivalent of Theo Hernandez, but a forward thinking left back would help jumpstart this team out of the mud.

So far, so good, Katranis notched the winning goal to beat the Whitecaps in Vancouver.

KEY HOME MATCHES

April 13: vs. Columbus Crew. Reigning MLS Cup champs in town. Any chance to watch Diego Rossi play is worth the price of admission.

May 4: vs. Sporting Kansas City. So much history between these teams. The crowd at this game will be jumping.

June 3: vs. Houston Dynamo. Revenge game against the team that knocked RSL out of the playoffs. Mastroeni might be dreading the thought of facing Carlos Carrasquilla again.

Sept. 21: vs. Portland Timbers. Early fall is the perfect time of the year to catch a game, and what better team than the Timbers, who have had a nice start to the season?

Broadcasts of RSL matches are available on Apple TV+, but require an additional subscription to MLS Season Pass CW

MARCH 28, 2024 | 15 | CITYWEEKLY.NET | | M USIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS | | CITY WEEKLY |
COURTESY PHOTO Real Salt Lake has seen a lot of turnover on its roster heading into the 2024 season.
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Creativity Meets Classic at Scelto

This Sandy restaurant is full of tasty risks that pay off nicely.

Though Italian restaurants often find themselves on the fancier end of the local dining spectrum, I’ve sometimes wondered if they rest on their laurels a bit too much. I get that there’s nothing quite like an excellent, rich bolognese or a cheesy brick of lasagna, but I think it’s rare to see an Italian-inspired restaurant take risks. As the history of ItalianAmerican cuisine has been built on a series of safe—albeit tasty—bets, it’s fun when a restaurant like Scelto comes along and shakes things up a bit.

Scelto (pronounced “shell-toe,” the Italian word for “chosen”) is the brainchild of local real estate investors Waleska Iglesias and Scott Dilley. Noting a lack of fine dining options in the Sandy area, Iglesias and Dilley have successfully created a destination restaurant in Scelto; this is a place you’re going to want to check out. When I visited, I was instantly spellbound with the overall vision that Scelto is going for. All that sleek velvet upholstery, modern design aesthetic and immaculate service has still got me swooning.

Having been sold on the face of Scelto’s concept, it was time to turn to the menu. Its beat is similar to other Italian spots around town, but items like the seared

ahi starter ($19) and the butternut squash salad ($10) give you a glimmer of creativity on display. I started things off with the arancini ($14), as I just can’t quit those golden-brown medallions of rice and cheese. I love them for many reasons, but I was a little concerned that they’d be a heavy way to start the meal; arancini tend to be umami bombs, which can be a double-edged sword sometimes.

The arancini at Scelto, however, have been prepared with this in mind. Serving them with a sprinkling of roasted fennel, salt and lemon zest provides plenty of great acid to cut through the mushroomforward richness. You’ll be tempted to just eat the arancini on their own, perhaps using the fennel as a garnish, but your best bet will be to engineer a bite that captures a little bit of everything, so you can truly appreciate the composition of this dish.

Next up was the short rib ($39), which borrows a bit more from France than Italy; its red wine jus evokes a well-prepared beef bourguignon. Of course, that shouldn’t deter you from ordering this generous helping of comfort food. The short rib itself is braised to tender perfection; the server will ask if you’d like a serrated steak knife with your meal, but a fork is all you’ll need to dive in. It’s served on a bed of creamy mashed potatoes, and the plate is adorned with a few caramelized shallot halves. It’s a simple dish that has been gorgeously executed, and it’s definitely a standout on the menu.

Moving on to the pasta side of things, I was intrigued by the gnocchi ($27) because it’s served with a ragu and a sage cream sauce. Typically, you get one or the other when ordering a pasta dish, so I was eager to see how Scelto would pull this off. The plate arrives with a heaping helping of deep red ragu, topped with homemade

gnocchi and then dolloped with the sage cream sauce. It’s an unconventional presentation to be sure, but I have to say I was impressed. Based on my experiences at Scelto, their interpretations of classics aren’t so rigid as to avoid experimentation—and that’s a really good thing.

My biggest gripe with nice Italian restaurants is that the food is usually spectacular for the first few bites, but the final few are diminished by the overall sameness of the dish. This gnocchi at Scelto was not guilty of this crime, because of the variety on display. The addition of pickled onion and crispy fried basil does a lot to help with this, as each bite carries an acidic snap or herbaceous crunch to cut through its richness.

If you’re interested in sampling the fruits of Scelto’s pizza oven, your best bets are the fig-and-prosciutto-topped Settembrina ($19) or the Cacio E Pepe ($17). Sure, you can get a perfectly serviceable Margharita ($18) here, but the former pair are better examples of the Scelto team’s creativity.

Based on my time spent at Scelto, I’d definitely say it’s accomplished its mission to be a bastion of culture and finedining flair for the Central Sandy community. What makes Scelto special, however, is that it’s achieved this goal while also providing so much more than a nice place to eat. The food here is creative and thoughtful while remaining accessible to local diners, and the level of service is top-notch. I could see its success emboldening other restaurateurs to set their sights further South along the Wasatch Front for similar concepts. CW

MARCH 28, 2024 | 17 | CITYWEEKLY.NET | | M USIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS | | CITY WEEKLY |
SCELTO 849 E. 9400 South, Sandy 385-542-3030 sceltoslc.com
DINE Protect Your Loved Ones 30 east Broadway, SLC 801.355.0667 Richsburgersngrub.com Burgers so good they’ll blow your mind!
ALEX SPRINGER

2 Row Brewing 6856 S. 300 West, Midvale 2RowBrewing.com

Avenues Proper

376 8th Ave, SLC avenuesproper.com

On Tap: Midnight Especial- Dark Mexican Lager

Bewilder Brewing

445 S. 400 West, SLC BewilderBrewing.com

On Tap:  Irish Lager

Bohemian Brewery

94 E. Fort Union Blvd, Midvale BohemianBrewery.com

On Tap: Boho Extra Dry Lager

Bonneville Brewery 1641 N. Main, Tooele BonnevilleBrewery.com

On Tap: Peaches and Cream Ale

Chappell Brewing 2285 S Main Street Salt Lake City, UT 84115 chappell.beer

On Tap: Liquid Lunch - IRA - NW India Red Ale

Level Crossing Brewing Co. 2496 S. West Temple, South Salt Lake

LevelCrossingBrewing.com

On Tap: Sinday - Pale Ale

Level Crossing Brewing Co., POST

550 So. 300 West #100, SLC LevelCrossingBrewing.com

On Tap: Down the Road - West Coast IPA

Moab Brewing

686 S. Main, Moab TheMoabBrewery.com

On Tap:  Bulliet Bourbon barrelaged Brown

Mountain West Cider 425 N. 400 West, SLC MountainWestCider.com

On Tap: Orange & Cardamom

Resolutions Cider 6.9% Abv

Offset Bier Co 1755 Bonanza Dr Unit C, Park City offsetbier.com/

On Tap: DOPO IPA

Ogden Beer Company 358 Park Blvd, Ogden

A list of what local craft breweries and cider houses have on tap this week

Red Rock Kimball Junction 1640 Redstone Center

Redrockbrewing.com

On Tap: Bamberg Rauch Bier

RoHa Brewing Project 30 Kensington Ave, SLC RoHaBrewing.com

On Tap: The Raven Blackberry Wheat

Roosters Brewing

Multiple Locations

RoostersBrewingCo.com

On Tap: Cyclops Irish Stout

SaltFire Brewing

2199 S. West Temple, S.Salt Lake SaltFireBrewing.com

On Tap: New Zealand hopped Pilsner

Salt Flats Brewing

2020 Industrial Circle, SLC SaltFlatsBeer.com

On Tap: Luau Rider - Coconut Chocolate Milk Stout

Scion Cider Bar

916 Jefferson St W, SLC Scionciderbar.com

On Tap: Shacksbury Yuzu

Strap Tank Brewery, Lehi 3661 Outlet Pkwy, Lehi, UT StrapTankBrewery.com

On Tap:  Celestial Lineage, Kölsch. 4.6%

Strap Tank Brewery, Springville 596 S 1750 W, Springville, UT StrapTankBrewery.com

On Tap: Bananza Hefeweizen

TF Brewing

936 S. 300 West, SLC TFBrewing.com

On Tap: Kiss From a Gose

Talisman Brewing Co. 1258 Gibson Ave, Ogden TalismanBrewingCo.com

On Tap: The Griffen- Citrus Wheat Ale in collaboration with the 419th at Hill AFB

Top of Main Brewing

250 Main, Park City, Utah topofmainbrewpub.com

On Tap: Top of Main’s Hop Carousel Rotating IPA

Uinta Brewing

BEER + PIZZA = <3

SUN-THU: 11am - 10pm • FRI-SAT: 11am - 11pm

550

Craft by Proper 1053 E. 2100 So., SLC properbrewingco.com

On Tap: Gungan Sith Lord - Dark Lager

Desert Edge Brewery 273 Trolley Square, SLC DesertEdgeBrewery.com

On Tap:  La Playa-Mexican Style lager

Epic Brewing Co. 825 S. State, SLC EpicBrewing.com

On Tap: Pink Boots IPA

Fisher Brewing Co. 320 W. 800 South, SLC FisherBeer.com

On Tap: A rotation of up to 17 Fresh Beers!

Grid City Beer Works 333 W. 2100 South, SLC GridCityBeerWorks.com

On Tap: Cask Nitro CO2

Helper Beer

159 N Main Street, Helper, UT  helperbeer.com

Hopkins Brewing Co. 1048 E. 2100 South, SLC HopkinsBrewingCompany.com

On Tap: Irish Stout

Kiitos Brewing 608 W. 700 South, SLC KiitosBrewing.com

OgdenRiverBrewing.com

On Tap: Injector Hazy IPA

Park City Brewery 1764 Uinta Way C1

ParkCityBrewing.com

On Tap: Jalapeno Ale

Policy Kings Brewery

223 N. 100 West, Cedar City PolicyKingsBrewery.com

Prodigy Brewing

25 W Center St. Logan Prodigy-brewing.com

On Tap: Cached Out Hefeweisen -- Now available to go!

Proper Brewing/Proper Burger

857 So. Main & 865 So. Main properbrewingco.com

Proper Brewing: SLC Pils - Pilsner

Proper Burger: Salted Caramel Porter - Porter Brewed with Caramel and Salt

Proper Brewing Moab 1393 US-191, Moab properbrewingco.com

On Tap: YRJB - Juicy IPA

Red Rock Brewing 254 So. 200 West RedRockBrewing.com

On Tap: Gypsy Scratch

Red Rock Fashion Place 6227 So. State Redrockbrewing.com

On Tap: Munich Dunkel

Ginger - 6% ABV

Second Summit Cider 4010 So. Main, Millcreek secondsummitcider.com

On Tap: Imperial, Dry cider with English apples

Shades Brewing

154 W. Utopia Ave, S. Salt Lake ShadesBrewing.beer

On Tap: Foggy Goggle Winter Lager Live Music:  Thursdays

Shades On State 366 S. State Street SLC Shadesonstate.com

On Tap: Hellion Blonde Ale

Silver Reef

4391 S. Enterprise Drive, St. George StGeorgeBev.com

Squatters Pub Brewery / Salt Lake Brewing Co. 147 W. Broadway, SLC saltlakebrewingco.com/ squatters

On Tap:  Salt Lake Brewing Co’s O’Caden Irish Red Ale

Squatters and Wasatch Brewery 1763 So 300 West SLC UT 84115 Utahbeers.com

On Tap: Wasatch Apricot Hefeweizen – Fruited Wheat Beer

1722 S. Fremont Drive, SLC UintaBrewing.com

On Tap: Was Angeles Craft Beer

UTOG

2331 Grant Ave, Ogden UTOGBrewing.com

On Tap: Golden Grant 5% ABV.

Vernal Brewing

55 S. 500 East, Vernal VernalBrewing.com

Wasatch Brew Pub 2110 S. Highland Drive, SLC saltlakebrewingco.com/ wasatch

On Tap:  Top of Main’s Mother Urban’s Parlor Blonde Ale

Zion Brewery

95 Zion Park Blvd, Springdale ZionBrewery.com

Zolupez

205 W. 29th Street #2, Ogden Zolupez.com

18 | MARCH 28, 2024 | CITY WEEKLY | | N EWS | A&E | DINING | CINEMA | MUSIC | | CITYWEEKLY.NET | LEVELCROSSINGBREWING.COM @LEVELCROSSINGBREWING
TWO LOCATIONS
S. 300 W. SUITE 100 SLC 2496 S. WEST TEMPLE, SLC

Spring Barrel Releases

Two very different beers showcased through casks

Salt Flats Open Road Series – Barrelaged Single Bock: This is the first beer in Salt Flat’s new Open Road Series of beers. It’s a traditional bock bier, aged in Salt Flat’s own Bonneville Bourbon barrels.

It pours a nice, cloudy mediumbrown; a honey color trickled in and out of the appearance. The aroma was very interesting—lots of bourbon here, which is never a bad thing, and hints of oak. You also get alight caramel touch to it, and lots of malted grains—a rather interesting, and very complex mixture of aromas, almost (but not completely) obscuring the initial style.

The flavor followed along very nicely. Some nice light caramel in the main body as well as a touch of light fruit and a bit of vanilla. The bourbon barrels are very well defined and not too hot. The 8.7 percent ABV is definitely there. The finish was loaded down with oaken and earthy malts and a ton of bourbon, leaving you with that long, lingering bourbon flavor in the back. Medium-bodied with appropriate softer carbonation, this was good—I had no issue finishing off the can, as it was easily drinkable.

Verdict: A tasty barrel-aged lager, and a great debut for this new series. The malt character is a bit tamer than that of a barleywine, which creates more drinkability while remaining complex. Well worth checking out; it would make an excellent Easter beer.

Uinta/Beehive - Jack Rabbit GinBarrel Aged Saison: This beer originally debuted in fall of 2016, but it’s under-

gone a few changes in the seven years since then. Gone is the 750ml corked and caged bottles, in favor of 16-ounce cans; the ABV has been dialed back to a more approachable 7.0 percent instead of its potent 9.3 percent. It still features Beehive Distilling Company’s locally-made barrel-aged gin.

Objectively, this is a nice beer—a real clean smelling saison with a simple French saison yeast profile, or something similar, and no rustic, farmy, funky or wild character whatsoever. It’s also a little sweet, almost like a Belgian tripel with the esters, the malt sugar and seemingly an added sugar source too, like a rock candy or something. In short, it’s not as saison-esque as some may like it to be.

Fortunately, the gin barrel element, the aspect that sold me this one in the first place, is killer here. Yeah, there’s juniper, but also some citrus peel notes, medicinal sage and even some vanilla from the oak. I think the base beer is well suited to handle the botanicals, the wood and the booze, as the whole is better than the sum of its parts here. The esters of the yeast do make sense with the gin, adding some useful complexity.

The gin isn’t super-pungent here, so less grain sugar would make it pop a bit more, I think. Even though this isn’t as weird and strongly-flavored as it was in previous incarnations, I think it’s a cool beer—obviously high quality from Uinta, and relatively unique still in terms of the taste overall. I’m not sure I would pay $12 (or whatever this cost seven years ago) for it, but it was a fun one to have next to some gin cocktails.

Verdict: This was way more dramatic on the gin the second time around, fresh and peppy and really dynamic. The base saison is still clean, and the barrel character seems really ramped-up. Obviously, this changes from batch to batch at least a little bit, but I was stoked to hear of its return.

Seek these offerings out at their respective breweries. Lucky for you, they’re practically right next to each other. As always, cheers! CW

MARCH 28, 2024 | 19 | CITYWEEKLY.NET | | M USIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS | | CITY WEEKLY |
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Women of Compassion Event with Mama Africa

If you’re a fan of spicy food, and have visited the Downtown Farmers Market with any regularity, you’ve likely heard of Mama Africa. It’s the business name of local entrepreneur Cathy TshilomboLokemba, and she’s been a force to be reckoned with in the local food scene. On March 30, from 3 p.m. to 6 p.m., Tshilombo-Lokemba will be hosting a Women of Compassion event at Spice on 9th (422 W. 900 South, Ste. 101). The event will spotlight local women leaders who exemplify compassion in their professional and personal lives, and will be a great place for community building, networking and sampling a bit of local food in the process.

Thai Better Opens Second Location

Thai Better is one of my favorite up and coming Thai restaurants, and I just saw that they opened a second location in South Salt Lake (1435 S. State Street). Local diners will recognize that this spot once belonged, at various times, to Thai Siam and Coco Wok. While we’ll miss those local spots, it’s nice to see this space will still be whipping up some hot curries and mango sticky rice.

Thai Better’s concept has taken traditional Thai recipes into the realm of fast-casual service, and I’ve become a bit of a regular at their South Jordan location (11511 S. 4000 West, Ste. 101). South Salt Lake Thai fans will want to check this place out.

Easter Brunch Roundup

Here are a few Easter brunch options I’ve got my eye on:

Easter Brunch at Grand America

555 S. Main Street, grandamerica.com

The Grand America has a stellar brunch buffet on most weekends, but they really go all out for Easter. Diners after something both posh and family-friendly will also want to check out their Easter Bunny Tea event on March 28-31.

Easter Brunch at La Caille

9565 Wasatch Boulevard, lacaille.com

Perhaps the fanciest of the fancy, this family-style brunch at La Caille is ideal for those looking to splurge a bit. Nosh on some giant prawns and crab claws to start, move onto the brûlée French toast, and then wrap things up with the prime rib.

Quote of the Week: “All happiness depends on a leisurely breakfast.” –John

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CITY WEEKLY

“During his monthly press conference on Thursday, Gov. Gary Herbert was asked about proposed legislation that would make Utah the 24th state to legalize medical marijuana,” reported City Weekly managing editor Enrique Limón in a Jan. 22, 2016, Buzz Blog entry.

Then-Gov. Herbert had said “the discussion is now at hand, the time is nigh, to see if we can find a pathway forward on this.” But Herbert was not interested, he said, in “having Dr. Feelgood out there say, ‘Yeah, yeah, ¿qué pasa? You know, here’s your doobie for the day, and you’ll feel better.’”

Limón did not allow Herbert’s bizarre twaddle—purportedly based on a George Carlin routine—to go unremarked. “The governor’s choice of words hinted that all Latinos are drug dealers—or at least, whatever version of ‘drug dealer’ or ‘medical pot provider’ he has in his head,” Limon wrote. He further quipped his suspicions that Herbert’s idea of an “authentic” taco was Taco Bell’s Doritos Locos variety, that the sombrero and serape constituted the entirety of Hispanic fancy dress, and that all Latinos loved the singer Selena. “OK, we all fucking love Selena,” Limón conceded. “Still, in a state where prescription opioid overdoses are among the highest in the nation, the governor’s comments stung.”

Such was the pith and tenor of the times, where substantive issues were often buried beneath a landslide of bunkum and folly. With so much seemingly going to pot, the only recourse, at times, was to crack wise.

Herbert’s hits continued with rolling out a welcome mat for the anti-LGBTQ World Congress of Families and his attempt to block federal funds to Planned Parenthood after a doctored video against the organization surfaced online. But he was far from the only person acting in questionable ways. Brad Smith—the dubiously qualified state superintendent of public instruction—was attacking Utah teachers and former campaign manager-turned House representative Justin Miller was reported to the police by County Mayor Ben McAdams on allegations of embezzling campaign funds.

Nationwide, anti-black killings at a Charleston, South Carolina, church horrified many while spawning knee-jerk defenses of the Confederate flag from reactionaries. Immigrants were subjected to scapegoating

from the presidential candidacy of Donald Trump. Closer to home, a far-right militia led by Ammon Bundy occupied Oregon’s Malheur National Wildlife Refuge.

The loss of trans woman Ashley Hallstrom (1988-2015), local artist Gyll Huff (1952-2015), peace activist Ethel Hale (19222016), 100 illegally cut trees in Big Cottonwood Canyon and of venerable meeting places like the Canyon Inn and downtown’s Arrow Press Square building, all left irreplaceable voids in their own ways. These injustices, losses and tragedies all required attention and coverage, and City Weekly duly provided them without neglecting the offbeat and amusing across the local scene.

Jake Nichols investigated ill-treated guest workers at resort hotels while Stephen Dark explored the rural neighborhood of Chesterfield in West Valley City. Gavin Sheehan reported on the world of YouTube gamers, Carolyn Campbell detailed the travails of Utah romance novelists and Colby Frazier profiled veteran reporter Rod Decker and covered the acquisition of The Salt Lake Tribune by Paul Huntsman.

City Weekly hosted a convention of the Association of Alternative Media and Jerre Wroble departed once more as editor, succeeded by Limón. Bill Frost’s “Ocho” was succeeded by Mason Rodrickc and Michelle Larson’s “The Nueve,” Randy Harward stepped up as music editor, and we enjoyed the aid of behind-the-scenes people like technical director Bryan Mannos, interns Ameda Tarr and Matthew Kunes, and proofreader Lance Gudmundsen (1939-2024).

Many events and people at this time certainly gave credence to the George Carlin joke about the “dope problem,” namely that there “were too many dopes.” Such could not be said about the folks keeping this paper alive, however.

Remembering Vol. 32: In the festival

“Every year, more than 40,000 people—including 30,000 out-of-state movie-lovers, filmmakers, industry professionals and journalists—descend on Park City for the Sundance Film Festival,” Scott Renshaw wrote on Jan. 21. “They subject themselves to the winter weather of a mountain ski town, and the complex logistics of navigating it, all for the chance to be there when the Next Big Thing is discovered.”

To help navigate the daunting event,

Renshaw and David Riedel provided readers with insight into that year’s proceedings by looking at past filmmaker discoveries, upcoming book adaptations and the festival’s mobile app. They were providing creative approaches to an issue that had become a yearly staple since we first reported on Sundance in the late 1980s, with advice that holds true for festival-goers today.

“If you can avoid it, don’t drive anywhere,” Renshaw advised. “Plenty of factors conspire to make it unpleasant to try to navigate the festival as an individual driver—and believe it or not, the winter weather is often the least of them.” During the festival’s screenings in Park City and Salt Lake, he noted, public transit was preferable.

“Get up early, stay up late, sleep at noon,” he continued. “‘Sold out’ shows are largely ‘sold out’ due to seats reserved for festival pass-holders, many of whom spend their nights at various parties and their mornings sleeping it off.” Consequently, waitlist seats were usually available at venues during the first and last shows of a given day.

“Trust the ‘buzz’ only so far,” Renshaw counseled. “... For the first two days, nobody really knows anything about most of the movies, and whatever deafening ‘you gotta see this’ bustle you’ll hear likely comes from particularly shrewd publicists or from the presence of one or two familiar actors.”

Renshaw concluded by suggesting that readers brown-bag meals rather than going for all the pricey concession items. That way, they might just save some extra funds for another waitlisted ticket.

In one quote

“In some baseball leagues, there is a rule— the mercy rule—that’s used when one team is beating another so badly, the umpire lifts his mask and declares the game over.

“In Utah, there’s a constitutionally mandated mercy rule built into the Legislature, requiring, forcing, limiting, restricting and demanding that this body of 104 souls meets no longer than 45 days. Lobbyists with money on the line and bills languishing in the final days might view this timeline as tyrannical, but warm-blooded citizens of Utah will remember 2016 as a year when this time limit was merciful. For, what if the Legislature met for 90, 120 or an unlimited number of days, as do lawmakers in other states? What if?

“All anyone knows is that in 45 short days, the Utah Legislature lived up to its reputation as a body thoroughly dominated by special interests as it invested hundreds of millions of dollars in a coal-shipping port in California and dubious water-pipeline projects, while simultaneously insisting it lacks sufficient funds to expand Medicaid and properly fund public education.”

(Colby Frazier, March 17, 2016)

In the park

“It’s 3:30 p.m. on a partly cloudy Wednesday, and I’m sitting in the shade of a pine tree, on a green knoll, in a park on Salt Lake City’s west side,” began Katherine Pioli for the April 21, 2016, issue. “For effect, I’d like to say that there’s no one around—the absence of voices and general lack of commotion makes it seem so—but, in truth, there are a few other people enjoying this place on a mid-afternoon.”

Pioli spotted a father walking with his child in an external-frame backpack and two elderly gentlemen making their way to a bench. Someone was navigating a grocery cart like a scooter across the asphalt.

“We are all here on this day—me and the old men, the young fathers, the wanderers—in this public space unlike any other found in this city, or most other places in the United States (except North Dakota),” Pioli mused. “We are at the International Peace Gardens in Jordan Park.”

The piece was one among many recreational illustrations that Pioli crafted for City Weekly between 2013 and 2019. Cultural events and outdoor happenings were her specialty, and whether the subject was a local dance company production, birdwatching excursions or stargazing trails, Pioli lent a keen eye and a graceful touch.

“City Weekly had a monthly A&E column called ‘Get Out,’” Pioli recently recalled. “I was spending lots of time wandering around the mountains, skiing the golf courses, and I figured why not get paid for it.”

With backgrounds in dance, English, and a working history with the Forest Service, Pioli was an ideal contributor—ever ready to help readers better appreciate the finer details of their surroundings, as in her Peace Gardens story: “A young couple is sitting, whispering. And I am looking at a cherry tree in bloom and, in the silence, contemplating the beauty of the world.”CW

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Volume 32: 2015 to 2016
salt lake
Rewind years of

Avenue Avengers Assemble

Scott Lippitt brings a ton of local talent together for Me, You, and the Avenues .

Some of the most magical moments happen when people come together to collaborate. Whether it’s the Avengers assembling, or bands coming together to form a supergroup, good things happen when people come together. SLC’s Avengers-level team up comes in the form of Me, You, and the Avenues, a collaboration album facilitated by singer/songwriter Scott Lippitt featuring some great local talent.

“The idea came from a sincere love for the music scene here and a good level of surprise around how much talent there is,” Lippitt said. “Three years ago, I found myself in a local record store perusing the local section. I had just left my professional career to pursue music full-time, and I was curious what kind of local music was out there. I purchased Nicole Canaan’s Wherever EP. This was before we became friends and before I knew who they were. I fell in love with that EP and started my journey of uncovering more and more local music. I couldn’t believe the quality, depth, and connection I was feeling to the music I was uncovering. The talent here is unreal.”

After Lippitt’s 2022 release Meaning Maker, collaboration was on his mind, and Canaan was the first person he asked. To his excitement, Canaan agreed, and this set this new album in motion. “I took that excitement and started asking more Utah musicians. I eventually had a list of 12

musicians/bands that were excited to collaborate and I hit the ground running. This project became my life for over a year, and I don’t regret a second of it.”

On the album, you’ll find Lippitt pairing up with Sean Mena, Josaleigh Pollett, Yuccas, Karl Ricky, Rachael Jenkins, Ambedo, From Dusk, Number One Babe Team, This Valley Glow, Maren Gayle, Nicole Canaan and Bly Wallentine. A few of the tracks have been released, but the full album drops on April 12.

Going through the album is a delightful and satisfying journey, because you get to hear the sounds of these beloved artists coming together as one. You can hear characteristics from Lippitt’s music fused with the others’ sounds to create something familiar, yet fresh and new. While each collaboration was a challenge, it wasn’t a difficult one. “We were each bringing in our styles, and we were equally interested in holding space for each other’s styles, but also seeing what’s new,” Lippitt said. “I didn’t have a vision for the album and then forced other people’s sounds to what I wanted, or I also didn’t feel forced to totally meet theirs.”

Getting local artists involved also wasn’t a challenge; plenty of local artists were excited at the thought of collaboration. “I was immediately on with being a part of this project,” said Ryan Delvey of This Valley Grow. “Bringing together a group of great artists and people to make a full album together is such a cool thing. It showcases local talent in such a real, communal way and really kind of is what music should be about at the end of the day. It has a sense of friendship and community in a way that I feel is important for artists to have a sense of these days.”

Singer/songwriter Josaleigh Pollett also expressed the same sentiment. “I am so deeply honored to be a part of Me, You, and the Avenues from Scott Lippitt,” they said. “I believe in our SLC music community so deeply. I’ve tried to place myself in other parts of this country/industry, and I al-

ways find myself coming back here to Salt Lake. Being a part of this collaborative album feels like coming home—being a part of something that celebrates our scene because we all made it, and Scott is the powerhouse of organization and creativity that made it happen. I am thrilled to have my name be anywhere near any of these folks in any capacity, and it feels really special to be a part of this collection.”

The name of the album itself holds great meaning for the artists as well. “It felt like I was exploring a neighborhood or a maze with each person. The ways we navigated and created were special to our connection, and that’s reflected in the distinctiveness of the songs,” Lippitt said.

For example, the last song on the album, “Avocado,” with Bly Wallentine is “a snapshot of Scott and my individual processes at the time of deepening and opening further into living in our hearts,” according to Wallentine. It was a no-brainer for them to agree to join Lippitt’s project.

MUSIC

“I love Scott’s approach to creation and collaboration, and it was so exciting to be included in the project. Very easy BIG YES when he asked me. Creating a community is collective healing. Coming together and being human, making art together. YES,” Wallentine said.

If you’re going for a walk through the Avenues, bring this album with you. It’s a perfect snapshot of the community and some of the people who create art in it. It’s a lovely collection that incorporates so many different styles into a beautiful harmony. “I love hearing these songs because I can hear a bit of my musical style and a bit of the other musician’s, too. And yet, we created something beyond what I would have created alone, certainly,” Lippitt said.

Me, You, and the Avenues is streaming everywhere April 12 with a release show at Kilby Court on April 14. You’ll be able to catch Lippitt with several of the collaborators on stage, so don’t miss out! CW

MARCH 28, 2024 | 23 | CITYWEEKLY.NET | | M USIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS | | CITY WEEKLY |
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Cinders EP Release show ft. Heber Matüte, West Max @ Soundwell 3/29

Beloved indie band Cinders are kicking spring off right with a tour, with SLC being their kickoff city. Get ready to dance and sing all night, as they fully unveil their latest EP. Cinders has given us a taste with tracks “Gold Pearl” and “Going Nowhere,” two new songs that exude the signature Cinders sound, but are still fresh and energetic. If you’re a fan of the band’s back catalog, you may know that their album Looking Forward to Looking Back turned five this last October (where do the years go?). “We put (literally) our blood, sweat, and tears into it. This is the album that pushed us to start touring to the east coast, as well as our first trip abroad!” the band said in a tribute post last October. “We are so grateful to everyone who was on the album, who came to see us tour it, and to everyone who has ever listened to it! If you have a favorite memory either seeing us playing songs from it, or just memories you have with songs from the album we’d love to have you tell us them!” It’s exciting to see local bands reach these levels of success and get their music to more and more listeners. Come rock out on Friday, March 29 at 8 p.m. Tickets for the all-ages show are $16 and can be found at soundwellslc.com. (Emilee Atkinson)

24 | MARCH 28, 2024 | CITY WEEKLY | | N EWS | A&E | DINING | CINEMA | MUSIC | | CITYWEEKLY.NET | Cinders AIMEE MAY PHOTOGRAPHY
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MUSIC PICK S

Slander @ The Marquis 3/30

Enter trap heaven this weekend with Los Angeles-based DJ and producer duo Slander. The two grammy-nominated artists, Scott Land and Derek Andersen, have been performing at the biggest global festivals in EDM including EDC (Las Vegas, Orlando and Mexico), Nocturnal Wonderland, Electric Zoo, Sun City Music Festival, Electric Forest and Ultra Music Festival over the past decade. They are fully-established powerhouses for future bass, house and their unique brand of “heaven trap,” which was attributed to their remix of Above & Beyond‘s “Love Is Not Enough” 10 years ago. The trap-trance combination genre pioneered by Slander has been consistent from their 2015 EP Nuclear Bonds to singles like “Gud Vibrations,” to their 2019 single “Love Is Gone” featuring Dylan Matthew. The description “heaven trap” describes the feelings these songs evoke; a place of pure joy and euphoria where one is free from this world. Their debut studio album, Thrive, was released in 2022 and is a futuristic cosmic love story that focuses on a singular astronaut in search of a new home for mankind. The beautiful production of Slander’s music can still feel like heaven even when conveying emotions like desperation and regret. For example, their single “Walk on Water” includes the lyrics, “I would walk on water / I would turn the tide / I’m sorry more than anything / That I left your side / I would raise the anchor / Of all the pain and pride / My God, I would do anything / To bring us back to life.” See Slander at The Marquis in Park City on Saturday, March 30 at 9 p.m. General admission costs $65. Go to tixr.com (Arica Roberts)

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Low Cut Connie, Fantastic Cat @ The State Room 4/1

It’s been just over a dozen years since Low Cut Connie’s debut record Get Out the Lotion was dubbed one of NPR’s “Fresh Air Top 10 albums” of 2011, and since that time, the kudos have kept coming. The Los Angeles Weekly described the band’s live show as “unmatched in all of rock right now.” In August 2015, former President Barack Obama included the band’s song “Boozophilia” on his presidential Spotify playlist. Their connection with the Commander in Chief continued when Low Cut Connie was given the honor of performing at President Biden’s inauguration ceremonies. This show pairs them with Fantastic Cat, a supergroup of sorts whose members include Anthony D’Amato, Don DiLego, Brian Dunne and Mike Montali (aka Hollis Brown), all of whom are exceptional singer/songwriters in their own right. “Everyone’s put out a bunch of records, and we each have typeA personalities,” DiLego said in an interview with Rock and Roll Globe. The title of their debut album, The Best of Fantastic Cat, may seem a bit presumptuous, but given the talents of those involved, they can easily live up to it. “We’ve each run our own careers, but for me, it’s become such a pleasure to be in a situation where I’m only 25% responsible for whatever happens,” DiLego continued. Given the combined talents of the musicians involved, that should be enough. Low Cut Connie and Fantastic Cat perform at The State Room at 7 p.m on Monday, April 1. Tickets cost $32; go to tix.axs.com. (Lee Zimmerman)

Saxsquatch @ Urban Lounge 4/1

Of all the things that seem like improbable, imaginary things, Bigfoot is the one that I think might exist. It gets a highly qualified “maybe” out of me. Aside from being the reigning hide-and-seek champion for 250-plus years in a row, they might have left behind solid evidence in the form of tissue, bone or waste samples. Or perhaps, signs of the mythical creature hitting the stage with a woodwind instrument. Performing as a one-beast band, Saxsquatch has come out from the woodlands and is currently in the midpoint of their coast-to-coast Bigfoot Rave tour. But for real, why the saxophone? “I studied Bird (Charlie Parker) and Trane (John Coltrane) growing up, because I wanted to play really fast and I wanted to impress the females? But as I grew up, I realized that life was more than female squatches,” Saxsquatch told Forbes. “I decided to really recognize the stories and the spirit in the notes these classic jazz musicians were playing. And I began to identify and really be able to tell my own story through my notes. That’s what I love.” Their take on “Maneater” with John Oates really is something that you need to experience for yourself. Not the collab we deserve, but definitely the collab we need. Catch Saxsquatch as they present the Bigfoot Rave at the Urban Lounge on Monday, April 1. Doors open at 7 p.m. Tickets for the 21+ show are $17 and can be found at 24tix.com (Mark Dago)

Gary Numan @ The Depot 4/3

Seeing Gary Numan live for the first time is akin to the feeling of the first rush of red wine finally hitting your bloodstream: life, flushed and fresh. And, as the old saying goes, like red wine, Gary Numan just seems to get better with age. If you’re looking for a show that is not just a concert, but an experience altogether, Numan and his band deliver upon that promise tenfold. Outfitted in post-apocalyptic, Fury Road garb with accents of blood red and deep black smeared upon their faces, the band isn’t just performing music for the audience, but projecting at them with impressive bouts of deep bass and sinister synthesizer, all coated in Numan’s signature voice and A-line dancelike maneuvers. Starting off his career as the frontman of The Tubeway Army, Numan sling-shotted himself into success with his solo work like the hit single “Cars,” and is known to many as a quintessential component of any ‘80s soundtrack worth its salt. However, his recent releases, which have wrung out his earlier club hits, leaving them taut and dripping with a darker edge, are fit less for a John Hughes movie and more for times of societal disruption and inevitable collapse. So … perfect! See Gary Numan for yourself at the all-ages show at The Depot on Sunday, April 3. Doors open at 7 p.m. and tickets (which start at $44.50) can be found at concerts.livenation.com. (Sophie Caligiuri)

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BRYNN OSBORN SARA-LOUISE
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Low Cut Connie Gary Numan
MUSIC PICK S

free will ASTROLOGY

ARIES (March 21-April 19)

In the coming days, your hunger will be so inexhaustible that you may feel driven to devour extravagant amounts of food and drink. It’s possible you will gain 10 pounds in a very short time. Who Knows? You might even enter an extreme eating contest and devour 46 dozen oysters in 10 minutes! April Fool! Although what I just said is remotely plausible, I foresee that you will sublimate your exorbitant hunger. You will realize it is spiritual in nature and can’t be gratified by eating food. As you explore your voracious longings, you will hopefully discover a half-hidden psychological need you have been suppressing. And then you will liberate that need and feed it what it craves!

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Taurus novelist Lionel Shriver writes, “There’s a freedom in apathy, a wild, dizzying liberation on which you can almost get drunk.” In accordance with astrological omens, I recommend you experiment with Shriver’s strategy in the coming weeks. April Fool! I lied. In fact, Lionel Shriver’s comment is one of the dumbest thoughts I have ever heard. Why would anyone want the cheap, damaged liberation that comes from feeling indifferent, numb and passionless? Please do all you can to disrupt and dissolve any attraction you may have to that state, Taurus. In my opinion, you now have a sacred duty to cultivate extra helpings of enthusiasm, zeal, liveliness and ambition.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

At enormous cost and after years of study, I have finally figured out the meaning of life, at least as it applies to you Geminis. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to reveal it to you unless you send me $1,000 and a case of Veuve Clicquot champagne. I’ve got to recoup my investment, right?! April Fool! Most of what I just said was a dirty lie. It’s true that I have worked hard to uncover the meaning of life for you Geminis. But I haven’t found it yet. And even if I did, I would of course provide it to you free. Luckily, you are now in a prime position to make dramatic progress in deciphering the meaning of life for yourself.

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

For a limited time only, you have permission from the cosmos to be a wildly charismatic egomaniac who brags incessantly and insists on getting your selfish needs met at all times and in all places. Please feel free to have maximum amounts of narcissistic fun, Cancerian! April Fool! I was exaggerating a bit, hoping to offer you medicinal encouragement so you will stop being so damn humble and self-effacing all the time. But the truth is, now is indeed an excellent time to assert your authority, expand your clout and flaunt your potency and sovereignty.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

Michael Scott was a character in the sitcom The Office. He was the boss of a paper company. Played by Leo actor Steve Carell, he was notoriously self-centered and obnoxious. However, there was one famous scene I will urge you to emulate. He was asked if he would rather be feared or loved. He replied, “Um, easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.” Be like Michael Scott, Leo! April Fool! I was half-kidding. It’s true I’m quite excited by the likelihood that you will receive floods of love in the coming weeks. It’s also true that I think you should do everything possible to boost this likelihood. But I would rather that people be amazed and pleased at how much they love you, not afraid.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Now would be an excellent time for you Virgos to snag a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Momma or Sugar NonBinary Nurturer. The astrological omens are telling me that life is expanding its willingness and capacity to provide you with help, support and maybe even extra cash. I dare you to dangle yourself as bait and sell your soul to the highest bidder. April Fool! I was half-kidding. While I do believe it’s prime time to ask for and receive more help, support and extra cash, I don’t believe you will have to sell your soul to get any of it. Just be yourself!

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Happy Unbirthday, Libra! It’s that time halfway between your last birthday and your next. Here are the presents I plan to give you: a boost in your receptivity to be loved and needed; a constructive relationship with obsession; more power to accomplish the half-right thing when it’s hard to do the totally right thing; the disposal of 85% of the psychic trash left over from the time between 2018 and 2023; and a provocative new invitation to transcend an outworn old taboo. April Fool! The truth is, I can’t possibly supply every one of you with these fine offerings, so please bestow them on yourself. Luckily, the cosmic currents will conspire with you to make these things happen.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

Now would be an excellent time to seek liposuction, a facelift, Botox, buttocks augmentation or hair transplants. Cosmic rhythms will be on your side if you change how you look. April Fool! Everything I just said was a lie. I’ve got nothing against cosmetic surgery, but now is not the right time to alter your appearance. Here’s the correct oracle: Shed your disguises, stop hiding anything about who you really are and show how proud you are of your idiosyncrasies.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

I command you to love Jesus and Buddha! If you don’t, you will burn in Hell! April Fool! I was just kidding. I was being sensationalistic to grab your attention. Here’s my real, true oracle for you: Love everybody, including Jesus and Buddha. And I mean love them all twice as strong and wild and tender. The cosmic powers ask it of you! The health of your immortal soul depends on it! Yes, Sagittarius, for your own selfish sake, you need to pour out more adoration and care and compassion than you ever have before. I’m not exaggerating! Be a lavish fountain of love!

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

If you gave me permission, I would cast a spell to arouse in you a case of ergophobia, i.e., an aversion to work. I think you need to take a sweet sabbatical from doing business as usual. April Fool! I was just joking about casting a spell on you. But I do wish you would indulge in a lazy, do-nothing retreat. If you want your ambitions to thrive later, you will be wise to enjoy a brief period of delightful emptiness and relaxing dormancy. As Buddhist teacher Sylvia Boorstein recommends, “Don’t just do something! Sit there!”

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

In accordance with current astrological omens, I suggest you get the book Brain Surgery for Beginners by Steven Parker and David West. You now have the power to learn and even master complex new skills, and this would be an excellent place to start. April Fool! I was half-kidding. I don’t really think you should take a scalpel to the gray matter of your friends and family members—or yourself, for that matter. But I am quite certain that you currently have an enhanced power to learn and even master new skills. It’s time to raise your educational ambitions to a higher octave. Find out what lessons and training you need most, then make plans to get them.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

In the religious beliefs of Louisiana Voodoo, one God presides over the universe but never meddles in the details of life. There are also many spirits who are always intervening and tinkering, intimately involved in the daily rhythm. They might do nice things or play tricks—and everything in between. In alignment with current astrological omens, I urge you to convert to the Louisiana Voodoo religion and try ingenious strategies to get the spirits to do your bidding. April Fool! I don’t really think you should convert. However, I believe it would be fun and righteous for you to proceed as if spirits are everywhere—and assume that you have the power to harness them to work on your behalf.

MARCH 28, 2024 | 29 | CITYWEEKLY.NET | | COMMUNITY | | CITY WEEKLY |
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Senior Revenue

Mid-Mod

World’s fairs in the United States used to be a thing. They were huge events held to showcase the newest technology, trends and fads in everything from science, industry, farming and homemaking.

Since the mid-19th century, more than 100 World’s fairs (called “expositions”) have been held around the globe, with the last U.S.-hosted one held in New Orleans in 1984.

ACROSS

1. Jesting sort

4. China, long ago (as seen in an airline name)

10. “Blueberries for ___” (award-winning kids’ book)

13. Chicken ___ king

14. Max for tax calculation

15. Bird that’s not native to Tasmania

16. Radio personality who’s good at archery?

18. With “The,” 1970s musical Oz remake

19. Scorched

20. Notable time period

21. Bionicles maker

22. “Return of the Jedi” princess

23. Actor who’s good at pressing clothes?

The only one I attended was in 1964 in Flushing Meadows (Queens), New York, as a child, where I got separated from my parents in the crowd and had the police find them for me. The site back then was just over 600 acres with 140 pavilions and 110 restaurants representing 80 nations. The theme, “Peace Through Understanding,” was dedicated to “Man’s Achievement on a Shrinking Globe in an Expanding Universe,” symbolized by a 12-storieshigh stainless-steel model of the Earth called the Unisphere (which is still there in the permanent public park).

It was very much like today’s Epcot Center in Florida—a showcase of midcentury modern America, highlighting the new space age and NASA. General Motors featured mock-ups of sleek space-age car designs in a groovy midmod building designed for the event.

Attendees had their first look ever at computers, teletype machines and punch cards. Formica, used on countertops and cabinet faces, was invented in the early 1900s but was used primarily to coat car parts and then bomb parts and airplane propellers in WWII. After the war, Formica laminates popped up all over the country—on dinette tables and throughout homes. The company built a “Formica House” on the only hill at the fair and more than 10 million visitors came to see how Formica could be used in a home.

Unfortunately, the company used the product on the exterior of the home, which didn’t stand up to the elements and hasn’t been used since except on the interior surfaces of homes and commercial properties.

Once the fair was over, 10 homes were licensed by Formica to be built around the country, and one of them is now on the market in Salt Lake City on “Pill Hill” (the upper Avenues) at 731 E. 17th Ave.

Jim Christopher, the local architect who passed away in 2016, was the lucky one to design this home and his emphasis on interior natural lighting could give some local modern architects a few lessons in design.

The home is very plain on the outside but wonderfully practical on the inside. There are five bedrooms and three baths, a large kitchen with floorto-ceiling windows to the rear yard plus a main floor rec room.

Downstairs is a walk-out basement with a kitchen and what we call a “forever home” because people can live on the main floor where the laundry is and never go downstairs. It’s currently open for showings on Saturdays from 1 to 3 p.m. If you’re a fan of Mid-Mod, stop by! n

26. July in Marseille

27. Pilot-licensing org.

28. Show grief

29. Cardinals’ cap initials

30. ___ nous (confidentially)

33. Ceremony performed by a mohel

36. Actress/TV host who’s good at economics?

39. “SNL” alum Horatio

40. Search site with an exclamation point

41. N, S, E, or W

43. Talk trash about

45. Write-___ (some nominees)

46. Number of three-letter chemical elements

47. Blues rocker who’s good at hauling stuff?

52. Prefix for drama

53. “Roots” author Haley

54. “Anchorman” anchorman Burgundy

55. Colts’ fathers

56. Big wheel

57. Rapper/actor who’s good at holding together documents?

60. Vow words

61. Curse-inducing stare

62. Graceful shade tree

63. ___ Moines, Iowa

64. Picks up for another year

65. “The Waste Land” author’s monogram

DOWN

1. Sings like a bird

2. Montreal CFLers

3. English actress Wilde of “Carrie” and “Wonder Woman 1984”

4. ___ au vin (French dish)

5. Kwik-E-Mart owner

6. Director Lars von ___

7. Le ___ (French seaport)

8. Starting lineups

9. The Beatles’ “___ Blues”

10. “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” setting

11. Fernando’s friend

12. Largest island of the Philippines

14. It’s a blast

17. ___ minute

21. Scales of the zodiac

23. 1998 Wimbledon champ Novotna

24. Food package date, informally

25. Yokels, in Australian slang

27. Andre the Giant’s role in “The Princess Bride”

31. Irish actor Stephen

32. Body of morals

34. Companion that’s great for apartments (and won’t run off)

35. They’re found in the epidermis

37. Alphabetical listing

38. Sound the horn

42. Phrase on tote bags and plastic containers

44. Try hard

47. Michelangelo masterpiece

48. Bypass a vowel

49. Auctioned autos, often

50. “Rise of the ___” (PlayStation game coming out on March 22)

51. Mom’s brother

52. ___ de los Muertos

55. ___-Therese, Quebec

57. To see, in Tijuana

58. “That’s disgusting”

59. Pt. of CBS

30 | MARCH 28, 2024 | CITY WEEKLY | | COMMUNITY | | CITYWEEKLY.NET |
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NEWS of the WEIRD

Creme de la Weird

Arthur “Jack” Schubarth, 80, of Vaughn, Montana, pleaded guilty on March 12 to two felony wildlife crimes after the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service and Montana Fish, Wildlife & Parks conducted a years-long investigation, Business Insider reported. Schubarth was accused of buying, selling and breeding “alternative” livestock, such as mountain sheep and mountain goats, for captive hunting operations. Between 2013 and 2021, court documents said, he conspired with others to create a large hybrid species of sheep that would garner higher prices from shooting preserves. To do so, he brought parts of Marco Polo argali sheep from Kyrgyzstan to the U.S. without declaring them. His other crimes include forging veterinary documents and shipping hybrid semen to other breeders. He faces jail time, fines and supervised release.

Recurring Theme

In the waning days of 2020, a silver monolith popped up in various locations in California, Texas, Romania and elsewhere. Now, Wales Online reports, it’s back. The 10-foot-tall tower, which appears to be stainless steel, turned up near Hay-on-Wye in Wales around March 10, when Richard Haynes came across it while he was out for a run. “I thought it ... might be a scientific media research thing collecting rainwater. But then I realized it was way too tall and strange for that. It was hollow and I imagine ... light enough for two people to carry it up and plant it in the ground,” Haynes said. Stay tuned.

Awesome!

n At the Goodwill store in Du Bois, Pennsylvania, workers found a treasure in a box of old Lego pieces, United Press International reported on March 12: a 14-karat gold Kanohi Hau mask from Lego’s Bionicle collection. Originally priced at Goodwill at $14.95, the piece eventually sold for $18,100 to an anonymous collector. “We didn’t know it was worth anything until people started asking if they could buy it for $1,000,” said Chad Smith, vice president of e-commerce and technology for Goodwill. Lego created only 30 pieces in gold in 2001.

n LAD Bible reported on March 5 about two unacquainted Brits who were headed to a holiday in Bangkok, Thailand. At the airport, Mark Garland, 58, of Wiltshire, tried to check in, but gate staff told him he already had. After some sleuthing, they realized there was another Mark Garland (62, from Bristol) on the flight—and the look-alikes were seated next to each other. As it happens, they live only about 15 miles apart and sometimes ride the same bus. They even have a friend in common. “We were so shocked by how strange it was,” said the younger Garland. “It was crazy—I have never known anything like it,” said the older. “I’ve made a friend for life.”

Quantitative Modeling Analyst

(QMA-SM) in Salt Lake City, UT. Collect, analyze & prep Financial Data for model dvlpmt. Build & implement financial statistical models to be used for Business Decisioning. MS+2 yrs rltd exp. Send resumes to Zions Bancorporation at ZionsCareers@zionsbancorp. com. Must reference job title & code in subject line.

Questionable Judgment

After Jacob Wright, 24, and Cambree Wright, 19, exchanged wedding vows on Feb. 10, it was time for pictures, Fox News reported. So Jacob grabbed his Apple Vision Pro headset and wore it while the photos were snapped. Jacob said he saw an opportunity to have fun and create a viral moment. “I was like, ‘Oh, it’d be like such a meme. It’d be so funny if we just took some pictures with it on after the wedding.” Sure enough, when they posted the pics, Cambree said she started getting “crazy” messages: “I woke up to 200-plus messages and just random girls telling me to divorce my husband.” But the bride said the photos “perfectly encompass Jacob and his personality ... and what our relationship is like.”

Bright Idea

Amber Denae Wright of Cape Town, South Africa, has shared a marriage tip on TikTok that other wives may want to adopt, People reported on March 9. A video on the social media site shows her husband, Nick, talking when Amber plays orchestra music from her phone. When Nick asks, “What is that? What are you playing?”

Amber says, “It’s Oscars music. You know, when the speeches are too long ...” Nick’s taking it well, though: “She’s been doing this the whole week. Every time I tell a story! Is this gonna be the rest of my life?” One TikTok commenter suggested, “I should use this at work when guys mansplain.”

Field Report

New Orleans Police Superintendent Anne Kirkpatrick told city council members on March 13 that rats had infested the department’s building so thoroughly that they made their way into the evidence room and were eating confiscated marijuana. “They’re all high,” she said, according to the Associated Press. “The uncleanliness is off the charts.” She elaborated, saying the building is full of mold and cockroaches, and staff suffer broken air conditioning and elevators.

The Golden Age of Air Travel

Indonesia’s National Transportation Safety Committee reported this week that on a Jan. 25 Batik Air flight, both pilots fell asleep for about 30 minutes as the plane flew off its “correct flight path.” Sky News reported that when the plane, carrying 153 passengers and four flight attendants, reached 36,000 feet, the 32-year-old pilot asked his co-pilot to take over while he rested. But the 28-year-old, whose wife recently delivered twins, also nodded off, and the plane flew itself for 241 miles before they woke up. They were able to get the plane back on the flight path and land safely in Jakarta.

Send your weird news items to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com

Oracle Programmer Analyst (OPA-CP) in Midvale, UT.

Resp for design, dvlpmt, test & deployment of Oracle E-business suite appls. Telecommuting permitted within the area of intended employment. BS followed by 5 yrs prog rltd exp. Send resumes to Zions Bancorporation at ZionsCareers@zionsbancorp. com. Must reference job title & code in subject line.

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