City Weekly May 16, 2019

MAY 16, 2019 | VOL. 35 N0. 51

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CONTRIBUTOR

4 LETTERS 6 OPINION 12 NEWS 14 A&E 19 CINEMA 61 DINE 69 MUSIC 77 COMMUNITY

LANCE GUDMUNDSEN

Our newsroom’s Grand Maester’s face lights up when he recalls his first journalism job: “printer’s devil” at age 12 at the weekly Lehi Free Press.

Responsibilities included melting lead, washing presses and linotyping. Stints at the U.’s Chrony, the Trib and, luckily for us, CW followed.

“Ink has been in my blood for decades,” he says.

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Lt. Gov. Spencer Cox throws hat in gubernatorial ring. facebook.com/slcweekly

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SOAP BOX

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COMMENTS@CITYWEEKLY.NET

Cover story, May 2, “Home is Where the Hardship Is”

About time. The rent in Utah is unbelievable when you consider they pay you low wages. @LIZMALMQUIST Via Instagram

MARINA MARQUEZA Via Instagram Check out City Weekly for an in-depth [take] on some local housing advocates.

I’m not sure of every idea they have, but love the passion.

MICHAEL M. PARKER Via Twitter Loved this article! @COURTNEYINCOLOR Via Instagram I can understand anyone wanting to have housing. I, too, was once a renter and know how tough it can be trying to find affordable housing. Our first home after separation from the military and marriage was a small one-bedroom apartment above a garage. Our first quest was to save an emergency fund sufficient to carry us through at least six months of low or no income.

@CITYWEEKLY

We sacrificed, and I really mean sacrificed, and lived on bare necessities until we accomplished that goal. Three years later, by giving up all “wants” and spending only on necessities, we were able to purchase our first home. Today, I find far too many young people want everything given to them without any personal sacrifice. The same opportunities exist today if you are willing to work hard and sacrifice the “I wants.”

OLD ATTORNEY Via cityweekly.net

thus proving some fearmonger’s distorted theory of libtard’s feelings.

The lack of subtlety in this administration’s maneuverings only points to the breathtaking inequality already present in existing American society. Let’s show these mediocre white males what diversity can create. I mean, even a 2-year-old doesn’t want to color with only the white crayons.

AMANDA HALE, Millcreek

People are so lazy they can’t even hold a sign. I wonder if they forgot to go to work?

TRAVIS MIDDLETON Via Instagram

A&E Essentials, May, 2, Sweetheart Come

Opinion, May 2, “Mike Lee: Surely You Jest”

Loved the line, “Children certainly are a resource for the future, but [Sen. Mike] Lee didn’t have to act like a 2-year-old in order to make his point.” I wish author Michael Robinson Sr. had taken the extra 5 minutes to Google who said if this guy can be senator, you can do anything. It was Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. I am extra touchy about women getting credit during the Trump administration; closer to the truth is I am so full of rage that the violence might pour from my lips if I “smile more,”

Please, God, don’t let me ever look at another review of Jane and Emma ever again.

Mormons are the worst audience. The worst. And I’m exhausted from trying to get their attention. Trying to get them to appreciate our history through art.

I can’t. I just can’t.

PLAYWRIGHT AND SCREENWRITER MELISSA LEILANI LARSON Via Twitter Just here to say I’m stoked to see your play [Sweetheart Come]! I read the A&E editor’s pick in City Weekly and it sounds fascinating! @PLANETJOSEPH Via Twitter

Thanks! I’m excited for you to see it.

MELISSA LEILANI LARSON Via Twitter

Social media post, May 10, In honor of Utah Cann, here’s a throwback to our inaugural Cannabis Issue

Does the Mormon church not realize by making weed legal, the state will have money to build bigger churches for their hypocritical asses? @GREEKAYALA Via Twitter While I am not sure cannabis is not a cure-all, it is a hell of a lot better than the opioids that the medical professions pushed for years.

LYNN BAKER Via Facebook

STAFF Publisher COPPERFIELD PUBLISHING, INC Director of Operations PETE SALTAS

Contributors KATHARINE BIELE, ROB BREZSNY, BABS DE LAY, KYLEE EHMANN, RACHELLE FERNANDEZ, JAMES FINCK, GEOFF GRIFFIN, MARYANN JOHANSON, KEITH L. McDONALD, KATHERINE PIOLI, NIC RENSHAW, KARA RHODES, MIKE RIEDEL, AMANDA ROCK, ERIC D. SNIDER, ALEX SPRINGER, AMANDA TAYLOR, LEE ZIMMERMAN Production Art Director DEREK CARLISLE Graphic Artists SOFIA CIFUENTES, SEAN HAIR, CHELSEA NEIDER

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GUEST

OPINION

Religious Intolerance

With the shooting of Muslims at prayer in New Zealand, as well as Jews at Chabad of Poway synagogue near San Diego and reports of violence toward Christians in foreign lands, there has been a great deal of talk lately about religious tolerance. Depending on the source, religious toleration is either getting better or worse. Those same sources also claim that the U.S. either has freedom of religion, separation of church and state, or is a Christian nation. When looking at the history of religion in the country, what becomes clear is that there never really has been too much tolerance. This tradition has continued in many ways to the present. What is most surprising now is where this lack of tolerance comes from.

Before we start any conversation on religion, we need to look at the different parts of the Constitution that deal with religion or God. It won’t take long because there are none.

It is commonly believed that our Constitution maintains a separation of church and state, but in fact those words do not exist. After the Constitution was ratified, the First Amendment was added that states, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof,” but that is all—no mention of religion, or God, or the separation thereof.

After the American Revolution, religious intolerance fell on anyone not Christian and, within Christianity, squarely on the Catholic church. For the vast majority of U.S. history, Catholics have been persecuted. In this democratic, Protestant nation, the hierarchy of the Catholic church was seen as too authoritarian. There was always the question of Catholics’ ultimate loyalty—was it the nation or the Pope? Catholic immigrants from places like Ireland and southern Europe faced an uphill battle once arriving in the U.S. because of their Catholic beliefs. The 1850s Know Nothing Party even made anti-Catholicism one of its political planks. Later in

BY JAMES FINCK the 1920s, there was a resurgence of the Ku Klux Klan in the North, as well as the South. This new nativist Klan put Catholics alongside blacks on its list of undesirables. The best example of this nation’s anti-Catholicism is in choices of presidents. The Catholic church is the largest denomination in the U.S. by far, yet the country has had more Quaker presidents (two) in the 20th century than Catholic presidents (one).

After non-Christians and Catholics, 19th century Americans mostly turned their intolerance toward several of the Christian denominations started in the U.S. The century saw the creation of the Seventh-day Adventists, Jehovah’s Witnesses, Christian Scientists and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Those were just the new religious movements that stuck. The ones who saw the most opposition were the Latter-day Saints. The LDS were violently driven out of Ohio, Missouri and finally, Illinois. The worst violence occurred in Jackson County, Mo., where Mormons were dragged from their homes and beaten while their property was destroyed. Their leaders were jailed and tortured, while those left behind were beaten, raped and eventually, murdered. All because they believed differently. Finally, the governor of Missouri issued an executive order that all Mormons were to be driven from the state, forcefully, if necessary. The Mormons made an appeal to the president but were told he needed the vote of Missouri too much to help. Finally, in Illinois, the Mormon prophet Joseph Smith was arrested for disturbing the peace and, while the sheriff turned his back, a mob stormed the jail, killing him and his brother. Following the death of Smith, the only place the Latter-day Saints could find any peace was in Utah, a land no one else wanted.

What is most interesting about religious intolerance today is that it is the last socially acceptable form of intolerance. A good contemporary example comes from one of my favorite shows, The Simpsons. Recently, the show has decided to remove the popular character of Apu because he was seen as culturally insensitive. Yet there has never been outcries for removing the character of Ned Flanders (stupid Flanders), who can be seen as an insulting caricature

of a crazy Christian. Hollywood is full of such examples. It is positive that you can no longer mock race, gender, nationality, or, in the case of religion, Jews or Muslims, yet we still do not criticize mocking all religions.

What is also interesting is that the same religions attacked in the 19th century are still attacked today. Even more curious is that the attacks come not only from those who are against religion but also from within Christianity itself. I have been teaching students about early American intolerance against Catholics for years, yet for most of my life had felt it a thing of the past. That was until I moved to my current home. To my surprise, I have had Christian students make anti-Catholic statements, most frequently along the lines that Catholics are not Christians, which is interesting considering for several centuries, Catholics were the only Christians. I even had a woman once tell me that she did not mind if her son joined a religious Boy Scout troop, as long as it wasn’t Catholic.

Even more surprising is that some of the most intolerant are the ones who often call for tolerance. The Broadway community not only accepted intolerance, they gave it a Tony Award in 2011 when it awarded The Book of Mormon as best musical. The show, which still draws large crowds, including many Christians, mocks belief in God in general, but specifically LDS believers. Granted, the Broadway community has always felt under attack from religious groups and might be justified for their acceptance of this play, yet it still seems wrong.

What we see is that religious intolerance has always been part of the American experience, and that is without even investigating the non-Christian religions. We also see that intolerance is not only of others outside your personal belief system, but from within as well. We are doing better in so many other areas today. There is no reason we cannot hope we can do better here as well. CW

Dr. James Finck is an associate professor of history at the University of Science and Arts of Oklahoma and chair of the Oklahoma Civil War Symposium.

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CITIZEN REV LT IN ONE WEEK, YOU CAN CHANGE THE WORLD

WHITE MESA RALLY

In Utah, the health and well-being of Native Americans falls in the face of uranium development. So, for the third year in a row, the Ute Mountain Ute community of White Mesa is holding a rally, protest and spiritual walk to make a statement against the contamination from the uranium mill and the desecration of sacred sites. Join this small community of about 300 people in the White Mesa Concerned Community Protest and Spiritual Walk. “Come walk with us and support clean air and clean water for our children and our grandchildren here in our Ute Mountain Ute community,” says community member Thelma Whiskers.

The walk takes protesters to the Energy Fuels White Mesa uranium mill, the source of this angst. White Mesa Community Center, White Mesa, about 85 miles south of Moab off Highway 191, 435-485-0265, Saturday, May 18, 11 a.m., free, bit.ly/2VtqkrV

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Maybe it’s a small step, but the Legislature finally passed the Community Renewable Energy Act at its last session.

Now you need to find out just what that means. Northern Utah was at the forefront of the effort to pass House Bill 411, a “first-of-its-kind law in the country that enables next steps toward a net100% renewable electricity portfolio by 2030 for Utah communities,” according to KUTV Channel 2. “It also represents the biggest breakthrough ever in Salt Lake City’s pursuit of clean energy,” Mayor Jackie Biskupski says. Bring your concerns and high-fives to HB411 and Recycling in Ogden. You can hear all about recycling and get an overview of the new law. Lighthouse Lounge, 130 25th St., Ogden, Monday, May 20, 6:30-8:30 p.m., free, bit.ly/2V8jTWc

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It might be hard to hear, but you should listen as people who have faced homelessness tell their stories. At Affordable Housing and Salt Lake Families, learn about the barriers to people in poverty.

Landlords, legislators, property managers, community leaders and service organizations are expected to participate in this discussion with the goal of reducing poverty by 10% in 10 years. “We want to discuss, research and learn from one another,” the event’s Facebook page says. The evening starts with an overview of the poverty initiative from Circles Salt Lake, leading into a panel and Q&A. The Friendly Neighborhood Senior Center, 1992 S. 200 East, Thursday, May 23, 6:30-7:30 p.m., free, bit.ly/2PW2Khz

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10 | MAY 16, 2019

HITS&MISSES

BY KATHARINE BIELE @kathybiele

Inland Mess

Well, uh, thanks. Yes, Salt Lake City does believe that you, Derek Miller, know what’s good for us and all will be well. At least that’s what you’re saying now as opposition to the selfcontradictory inland port grows. Miller is trying the olive branch technique, saying it might be time for the Legislature to revisit Salt Lake’s role in the “port,” according to The Salt Lake Tribune. Like, sure, the Legislature will be just fine with that— like they were with the new prison, the city’s watershed, billboards, golf courses, the Legacy Highway and even plastic bags. Fox 13 even went to Kansas to show how great their inland port was doing, and found that it was just dandy for businesses, not so much for residents. And, oh yeah, Kansas is flat and windy and doesn’t have to deal with wetland and pollution issues like Salt Lake’s. The city council is trying to be diplomatic, but outgoing Mayor Jackie Biskupski is telling it like it is.

The majority in charge of the state thinks of Salt Lake as a pile of rubbish.

Up in Smoke

Hard to believe, but Utah’s attorney general just signed on with 38 other states seeking access to the federal banking system for, wait for it, the marijuana industry. No, Utah isn’t going to be the pot capital of the nation, but it is acknowledging an increasing acceptance of the medicinal benefits of this non-opioid substance. A Utah Policy report notes that many marijuana businesses use cash only, and AG Sean Reyes said that poses a threat to public safety.

We’ll call this an incremental step. City Weekly’s Utah Cann conference helped bring the issue into focus, despite the recent eviscerating of Proposition 2. Meanwhile, The Utah Department of Agriculture and Food is shortening licensure for growers. It’s not the end of the story. The Trib says the state just contracted with a problematic software company to track the program.

Salt Lake’s Ivory Tower

Not to be too snarky, but Ivory Homes wants to look at more affordable housing options?

Why do we think that Alpine is blanketed with Stepford-like developments housing Utah’s incoming population? But now, in the face of a recent study that showed home prices rising 14 percent last year— almost twice the national average—Clark Ivory is vowing to turn the tide, according to the Trib. Ivory is looking at more townhouses, multi-family dwellings and smaller-lot homes in the future. Indeed, that’s likely to be the trend whether communities like Cottonwood like it or not.

Ivory is probably hoping for some good PR, despite his name already being all over developments and centers throughout the state.

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12 | MAY 16, 2019

NEWS

GOVERNMENT

Keeping Count

The undertaking to prepare for the 2020 census in one word? Massive.

T

he presidential election isn’t the only event of national importance next year. There’s also a decennial census, a Constitutionally-mandated count of all persons living in the U.S., regardless of age or immigration status. The survey’s impact is wide-ranging: It determines Utah’s Congressional representation and the funding the Beehive State receives for a slew of federal programs—from Medicaid to Section 8 housing choice vouchers; affects the amount of federal loans that University of Utah students receive; and can hurt Utah businesses that benefit from government business and industry loans.

“The census provides us with critical information about the makeup of our community, and also directs millions of dollars of funding back into our communities, and that’s why it’s important for people to respond,” Jake Fitisemanu, a West Valley City councilman, says. Many Utahns who pay their income taxes also reap federal benefits, like Medicaid or Medicare, Fitisemanu adds, or their communities are helped by the federal money allocated for transportation and education-related measures. “A lot of these big programs, these are censusdirected funds that come back to our state, depending on the count from the census.”

Even though the American Community Survey yields annual information on the U.S. and its residents, the census provides a baseline that’s built upon for the next decade. “And so if we don’t get this right, it messes up the data, in my opinion, for years to come,” retired state lawmaker Rebecca Chavez-Houck says.

Expect a letter in your mailbox sometime around March 2020. “Everyone with a typical mailing address is going to receive a postcard inviting them to respond to the census,” Mallory Bateman, the state data center coordinator at the Kem C. Gardner Policy Institute, says. Census Day 2020 will be on April 1, but people are encouraged to participate a week early, when the feds will open an online portal where respondents can enter their information. “It’s kind of like early voting,” Bateman explains of the first-ever online response option. “You can get in ahead of the rush.”

If residents don’t respond by the April deadline, Bateman says, the Census Bureau will consider them unresponsive, and

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BY KELAN LYONS klyons@cityweekly.net @kelan_lyons

Former state Rep. Rebecca Chavez-Houck says census data makes elected officials better able to meet their voters’ needs. “The more we know where people are at, I think the more effective an elected official can be in being responsive to their constituents,” she says. will send follow-up letters to their homes.

“If they haven’t heard from you by a certain number of mailings, then someone will come to your door.”

Bateman says there are a multitude of “complete count committees” at the state, city and county level, the most local of which are “more focused on outreach, [and] interacting with community leaders and trusted voices in the community to try and build a more grassroots information network.”

Fitisemanu’s census involvement underscores just how much cooperation the survey requires among different-sized governmental entities in order to get as close as possible to an accurate count. He serves on complete count committees for the state and Salt Lake County, as well as the National Advisory Committee for the U.S. Census Bureau. Administering the census is the country’s largest civilian mobilization effort, requiring the hiring of hundreds of thousands of people, not to mention public servants who work in local and state offices across the country and help the federal Census Bureau prepare for its big day.

“It looks like the undercount problem has become a bigger problem over time,” Matthew Burbank, an associate professor in the University of Utah’s Department of Political Science, says. He has a few theories as to why. One involves an increase in the number of people who don’t think the government should have access to any of their personal information. Another is a proliferation of undocumented immigrants who are unwilling to respond—the number of unauthorized migrants rose from 1990 until 2010, the year of the last census, and has since declined— despite that there are no negative repercussions to filling out the survey. Bureau members could face up to a five-year prison sentence and a $250,000 fine for violating respondents’ confidentiality, and government agencies or courts cannot use personal information against those who answer the survey.

“There’s also, some sense, just the way people live and how busy they are, that too can contribute to undercounting because people aren’t as attentive to something

as filling out a census as they are to filing their taxes,” Burbank says.

Utah’s response rate during the past census was 75%, according to a video made by the Gardner Policy Institute. Concerns abound that the upcoming census will result in yet another undercount. It will be the first that will be conducted largely online, potentially posing a challenge for rural, elderly or immigrant Utahns, or Native Americans living on tribal lands, who do not have internet access. “People don’t have to respond online,” Bateman says, indicating there are alternatives for those who don’t want, or aren’t able, to e-file. “They still will have that paper option, or over the phone.”

Another issue is the Trump administration’s pithy budget request for the census.

It’s about $2 billion shy of what experts say they need for a successful survey. Bateman’s worry is the Census Bureau will need to invest more money in following up with people who don’t respond to the initial survey, a costly endeavor. Chavez-Houck, meanwhile, notes that the testing of the census’ questions was not as extensive as years’ past, due to funding issues.

“The fewer test runs you have then the fewer opportunities you have to adjust and recalibrate your strategy,” she warns.

Perhaps the most publicly known threat facing a complete count is the Trump administration’s plans to ask respondents if they are U.S. citizens, a decision the Supreme Court will be mulling over until the summer. A study conducted by Harvard researchers cautions the citizenship question could lead to an undercount of up to 4.6 million Hispanics.

“There’s a lot of fear out there. People come from mixed status families, and what we are hearing is they don’t even want to touch the census because of the political environment that we’re in,” Ze Xiao, the director of Salt Lake County’s Office for New Americans who is also coordinating the county’s census efforts, says. Xiao adds that even people who are in the U.S. legally have indicated they don’t want to fill out the census, “in solidarity with their immigrant neighbors and friends.”

An elected official in the minority-majority West Valley City, Fitisemanu plans on telling immigrants wary of filling out the census that he shares their unease. “I would tell them their concern is valid, but that the benefits we get from a complete census count can benefit our communities, and that’s still a worthy reason to participate,” he says.

Chavez-Houck acknowledges the American Community Survey asks a question about citizenship, but the census is too important to include a question that respondents are wary of answering. “We need a good baseline count,” she says, “and if that chills the response rate, then we don’t have as good data” All these potential pitfalls have rallied people like Bateman, Fitisemanu, Xiao and Chavez-Houck to start gearing up for 2020.

Xiao says the county has a four-prong approach to ensure the census count is accurate: updating address lists so those who don’t respond will receive follow-up prods; coordinating with local, state and national efforts to ensure resources are maximized and aren’t duplicated; forming subcommittees within the Salt Lake County Complete Count Committee; and engaging with and informing local residents.

“From now to December, we’re really just doing education, education, education in the community,” Xiao says. They’re also coming up with strategies to connect with “hard-to-count communities,” she says, which at the county level includes new Americans, senior citizens and children under the age of 5. “The outreach and the education is so extremely important right now.”

Efforts from city and county officials are crucial, Fitisemanu stresses, because the Legislature failed to provide any funding for census efforts, and the feds haven’t allocated as much money as those surveys conducted under previous administrations.

“This is not business as usual. This is not the 2010 census,” Fitisemanu says. “Because of the census-related policy and funding decisions that have been made, cities and counties will have to pick up the slack due to the lack of resources allocated by the state and the federal government.” CW

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Cold: Susan Powell Case Files Podcast Live It was nearly 10 years ago when Susan Powell went missing from her West Valley City home; police immediately suspected her husband Josh.

Susan’s body was never found. Josh was never charged. He took his own life and the couple’s two boys in 2012. WVC police declared the case cold in 2013.

KSL Channel 5 investigative reporter Dave Cawley spent years looking into the case, and in November 2018, he started putting out a weekly podcast titled Cold: Susan Powell Case Files: The Untold Story. The 18 episodes have garnered more than 10 million downloads.

While true crime has proved to be a popular genre in podcasting, what stands out about Cold is that it strives to be more than a “whodunit.”

Cawley focuses on understanding how Susan was not able to get out of an abusive marriage, and hopes to help other women in future situations.

Cawley goes beyond the podcast episodes for this special live presentation. “In a live event, Cold ditches the script,” he says. “We’ll share more of our personal experiences investigating the case. You’ll hear the story behind the story. We’ll discuss the important themes and issues raised

by Susan’s disappearance, and share how to turn those discussions into positive action in our own individual lives.”

Cawley also conducts a live interview with retired detective Ellis Maxwell, who was the lead investigator on the case. A portion of every ticket sold benefits the Utah Domestic Violence Coalition. (Geoff Griffin) Cold: Susan Powell Case Files Podcast Live @ Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main, May 16, 4 & 8 p.m., $24.50-$44.50, artsaltlake.org

Complete listings online at cityweekly.net

ALEX GALLIVAN

DEVIN ROSS RICHEY

VIA KSL

THURSDAY 5/16

ENTERTAINMENT PICKS, MAY 16-22, 2019

FRIDAY 5/17

FRIDAY 5/17

These days, it doesn’t seem like diverse traditions are valued like they once were. The nation’s political and cultural divide seems to negate the need to celebrate the ancestry, individuality and heritage that make us who we are.

That makes the Living Traditions Festival, sponsored by the Salt Lake City Arts Council, an essential event. The free three-day celebration reminds us of the need to respect and value the many cultures that make up our area’s rich tapestry. Music, crafts, flavors and festivities are presented by more than 70 groups and organizations taking part in this popular annual kickoff of the summer festival season.

“The Living Traditions program fosters the preservation and inclusion of Utah’s diverse cultural landscape and artistic traditions,” Salt Lake City Arts Council director Felicia Baca writes via email. “It also aids conversations around social justice, equity and diversity by presenting folk art—art that reflects both the unique qualities of various cultures and the similarities of human experience—in a festive and safe environment.”

Baca also notes that for the first time, the event includes a series of free workshops (visit the festival website or Facebook page for details).

It’s also adding an expanded children’s art yard, featuring a number of new participants from various organizations and art groups.

“Community engagement is important to the mission of the Salt Lake City Arts Council,” Baca adds. “We’re interested in adding new elements that introduce participants to exciting new opportunities and experiences that they may not otherwise encounter.” (Lee Zimmerman) Living Traditions Festival @ Library Square, 400 S. 200 East, May 17, 5 p.m.-10 p.m.; May 18, noon-10 p.m.; May 19, noon-7 p.m., free, livingtraditionsfestival.com

Before the big parade and the parties can begin, Utah Pride Days needs to kick off by celebrating and commemorating members of the state’s LGBTQ community.

The grand festivities get underway at the fourth Pride Spectacular, a dinner and fundraiser hosted by the Utah Pride Center. Liz Pitts, director of community engagement, says the night marks a fun and energetic way to start the month-long celebration of LGBTQ history, culture, resistance and joy and is a way for the center to reflect on the year’s achievements—a fitting sentiment, given this year’s “Exist. Resist.

Persist.” theme.

And, given 2019 marks the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall Riots—an event that jump-started the modern LGBTQ rights movement—this year’s Spectacular takes a longer look of progress and equity. “It’s a great celebration and commemoration of what we’ve done in the last 50 years, and we’re looking forward to the next 50 years,” Pitt says.

This attitude is reflected in the night’s main event: the awarding of the Kristen Ries Community Service Award and The Utah Pride Lifetime Achievement Award. This year’s recipients are Sue Robins and Pepper Prespentt, and the lifetime achievement award goes to Ben Williams and Connell O’Donovan, co-chairs of a local queer history group.

Tickets for the main event are sold out, but there are plenty of tickets left for the Pride Spectacular after-party. This late-night celebration features a DJ, plenty of food, drinks and dancing. (Kylee Ehmann) Pride Spectacular @ The Union Event Center, 235 N. 500 West, May 17, 6-9:30 p.m.; after-party 9:30-11:30 p.m., $20-$150, utahpridecenter.org

Living Traditions Festival

KEVIN DAY PHOTOGRAPHY

ESSENTIALS

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FRIDAY 5/17

Celeste Ng: Little Fires Everywhere Celeste Ng is working on two new novels. “I won’t say too much about plot because it could change; I could tell you the plot and two years from now it could come out and be a dinosaur space romance,” she says, “but I think they’re going to deal with similar themes to my first book, which had to do with being an outsider versus belonging, about identity and family and relationships between parents and children from generation to generation.”

That first book to which she refers is Everything I Never Told You, Ng’s 2014 debut novel. Her second novel, released in 2017, was the much-lauded bestseller Little Fires Everywhere, currently in production as a Hulu mini-series starring Reese Witherspoon and Kerry Washington.

Ng comes to Salt Lake City—her first time in Utah—supporting the paperback release of Little Fires Everywhere, in a conversation with Utah poet laureate Paisley Rekdal. “It’s very much about motherhood and all the complicated facets of it—how we experience it and what we’re told it should be like,” Ng says of the book. “But I think it’s also about power and control, because that’s part of the mother-child relationship, too.”

The book plays with the question, what happens when our secrets are dislodged? “In the novel, Shaker Heights is almost a character in and of itself,” Ng says of the suburban setting, “and it’s a little complacent, in some ways, and it takes something really big to kind of get people’s attention. I think that’s true for communities as well as people.” (Naomi Clegg) Celeste Ng: Little Fires Everywhere @ Wasatch Presbyterian Church, 1626 S. 1700 East, May 17, 7 p.m., $20, paperback copy included; limited free student tickets available, kingsenglish.com

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A&E

Feminine Mystique

Girl Child explores the trials and treasures of being a woman.

BY KATHERINE PIOLI comments@cityweekly.net

I

n a small, second-story dance studio on a recent Saturday morning, two women are flipping their hair, throwing their hips and eyeing each other like first-class rivals at a junior high school dance. The tension builds in step with the rising techno beat. Suddenly, hands slapping, they close the small gap between them. One woman jumps on the other’s back.

“It’s got to be sharp. It could even go faster,” choreographer Karin Fenn says, watching from the edge of the room.

This duet—part of Fenn’s new eveninglength work Girl Child—is playful. But it’s also violent. Fenn explains that it comes out of her own junior high school days. The Susie Hard Chicks, the mean girls, the bullies, were always looking for fresh fodder, Fenn says. She still remembers what it felt like to be picked on.

Mining her own physical and emotional hardships for creative content isn’t something new for Fenn. In 2010, she contributed a tension-filled work about relationships for Ririe-Woodbury Dance Co.’s alumni performance Momentum. And her 2017 independent evening-length work Under Your Skin dealt with similar themes.

In beginning to think about Girl Child, Fenn says she found herself reflecting on her life as a single parent. “I realized that

I was the third generation of women in my family raising children alone and outside of marriage,” she says. “I didn’t have a network. I had to do all my own. And then I started to think about how I am the glue that holds everything together.”

Fenn says she is still surprised by how hard most women have to work in their lives.

They are the mother, the housekeeper and the professional. They are expected to excel in every area. And on top of that, women have to confront sexual assault, which Fenn fears is still normalized and largely ignored; just look at the last round of Supreme Court justice nomination hearings, she says. In a time when women should be finding equality, it feels to Fenn like we are losing ground.

Discussing these issues can be challenging. It can be uncomfortable to face society’s lack of progress. That is where art comes in to help. For Fenn, movement, theater and dance are powerful and useful ways to look at these human challenges.

Fenn has been a vital part of Salt Lake’s dance scene for the past three decades.

Her professional career began in 1985 with Ririe-Woodbury, and she remained with the company for six years before moving on to teach in Utah, Washington state and abroad in American Samoa. She returned in the early 2000s to enter the MFA program for Modern Dance at the University of Utah. Since then, she has performed locally with RawMoves Dance, as a guest for RDT and Ririe-Woodbury, and with dance theater company My Turkey Sandwich. Although most of her work during the past decade has been as the dance specialist at the Salt Lake Arts Academy, she has tried to keep her choreographic skills sharpened with occasional pieces of work submitted to the local Mudson works-in-progress series and with her own independent works.

For Girl Child, Fenn pulled together an impressive ensemble—including Emily Haygeman, Ai Fujii Nelson, Corinne Penka, Eileen Rojas, Frieda Johnston Dicke and

EMILY HAYGEMANN

DANCE

Sadie Havlicek—made up of former professional dancers, dance teachers and two of her own former students. The choreography is set to original music composed and performed by Ogden-born musician Wachira Waigwa Stone.

Working with her dancers, whom Fenn praises constantly—“They have so much to say and are such mature artists”—the process dug deep into the emotional experience of being a woman. “It was very visceral,” Fenn says, “almost like method acting. I worked a lot by [asking] questions. When was the first time you were cognizant of being a girl? What was that like? A lot of this work’s story or narrative is generated by the dancers because I wanted to get as many perspectives as possible.”

After the two animated dancers find their last pose—the question remains, who won the mean girl contest—the rehearsal danc-

Ai Fujii Nelson and Eileen Rojas rehearse Girl Child

ers come in for notes. Penka joins Fenn at the side of the room. Girl Child, Penka says, connects deeply with her own experiences.

“For me,” she says, “this duet is about the chaos of being a young woman. I remember feeling like everything was the end of the world. It’s so humorous. You want to look at your teen self and say, ‘baby girl, you should relax.’” CW

KF DANCE: GIRL CHILD

Salt Lake Arts Academy 844 S. 200 East May 16-18 7 p.m. $15 kfdance.org

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While it’s possible you already got your dose of Star Wars on “May the Fourth Be With You” weekend, or the following weekend with Utah Symphony’s performance accompanying the original 1977 film, it’s never too late to celebrate your pop culture love of that galaxy far, far away. Visit Urban Arts Gallery (116 S. Rio Grande, utaharts.org) through June 2 for its annual Star Wars: Heroes and Villains group show, with local artists presenting their interpretations of beloved (and hissable) characters from the saga (Quintin McCann’s Yoda sculpture is pictured).

PERFORMANCE

THEATER

OPERA

DANCE

Celeste Ng: Little Fires Everywhere Wasatch Presbyterian Church, 1626 S. 1700 East, May 17, 7 p.m., kingsenglish.com (see p. 14) David Habben: Mr. Sherman’s Cloud The King’s English Bookshop 1511 S. 1500 East, May 18, 11 a.m., kingsenglish.com David K. McDonnell: Buy the Horse a Guinness & Other Wee Tales of Ireland The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, May 21, 7 p.m., kingsenglish.com Jessica Day George: The Queen’s Secret The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, May 22, 7 p.m., kingsenglish.com Katherine Applegate: Endling #2: The First The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, May 18, 4 p.m., kingsenglish.com Leslie Miller: Reimagining a Place for the Wild The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, May 16, 7 p.m., kingsenglish.com Nicole Tomlin: Best Dog Hikes Utah The King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, May 18, 2 p.m., kingsenglish.com

LITERARY EVENTS

Field Work: Aligning Poetry & Science: River Walk w/ Paisley Rekdal & Brian Tonetti Day-Riverside Library, 1575 W. 1000 North, May 16, 6-9 p.m., slcpl.org SAGE Utah Poetry Reading Weller Bookworks, 607 Trolley Square, May 20, 6:30 p.m., wellerbookworks.com

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All-Star Youth Pro-Am Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, May 21, 7 p.m., utahsymphony.org Armed Forces Day Concert Gallivan Center, 239 S. Main, May 18, 4:30 p.m., casu.org Salt Lake Symphony: Mahler in May Libby Gardner Hall, 1375 E. Presidents Circle, May 16,

AUTHOR APPEARANCES

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CLASSICAL & SYMPHONY

LITERATURE

KF Dance: Girl Child Salt Lake Arts Academy, 844 S. 200 East, through May 18, 7 p.m., kfdance.org (see p. 16) Mountain West Ballet: A Midsummer Night’s Dream Sandy Amphitheater, 9400 S. 1300 East, May 17-18 & 20, 7:30 p.m.; May 18, 3 p.m. matinee, mountainwestballet.org Repertory Dance Theatre & Raw Moves: Wild. Barefoot. Free Jeanne Wagner Theatre, 138 W. 300 South, May 17, 7 p.m., artsaltlake.org Repertory Dance Theatre & Raw Moves: Take It Away Jeanne Wagner Theatre, 138 W. 300 South, May 18, 7 p.m., artsaltlake.org Silhouette Dance: A Joyful Heart, A Celebration Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, May 18, 2 & 6 p.m., tickets.utah.edu

Comedy Church w/ Greg Kyte Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, May 19, 7:30 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Comedy Killers Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, May 16, 7:30 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Craig Bielik Wiseguys Ogden, 269 25th St., May 17-18, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Hari Kondabolu Wiseguys SLC, 194 S. 400 West, May 17-18, 7 & 9:30 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com Kermet Apio Wiseguys West Jordan, 3763 W. Center Park Drive, May 17-18, 8 p.m., wiseguyscomedy.com

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10-Minute Operas Union Station, 2501 Wall Ave., Ogden, May 21, 7:30 p.m., symphonyballet.org Deseret Experimental Opera: Life Relegated The Gateway, 400 W. South Temple, May 16-18, 7:30 p.m.; May 19, 2 p.m., deseretopera.org School of Music & American West Symphony: Puccini’s La Boheme Libby Gardner Hall, 1375 E. Presidents Circle, May 18, 7:30 p.m., tickets.utah.edu

COMEDY & IMPROV

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12 Minutes Max Main Library, 210 E. 400 South, May 19, 2-3:30 p.m., slcpl.org Grease Pioneer Theatre, 300 S. 1400 East, through May 25, Mondays-Thursdays, 7 p.m.; Fridays, 7:30 p.m.; Saturdays, 2 & 7:30 p.m., pioneertheatre.org Ideation Wasatch Theatre Co., 124 S. 400 West, through June 1, wasatchtheatre.org JMatilda Hale Centre Theatre, 9900 S. Monroe St., Sandy, through June 15, hct.org Singin’ in the Rain The Ziegfeld Theater, 3934 S. Washington Boulevard, Ogden, through May 18, theziegfeldtheater.com Steel Magnolias Hale Centre Theatre, 9900 S. Monroe St., Sandy, through June 1, hct.org Sweetheart Come Rose Wagner Center, 962 S. 425 East, through May 18, artsaltlake.org

7:30 p.m., saltlakesymphony.org Utah Symphony: Aaron Copland’s Appalachian Spring & Billy the Kid Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, May 17, 10 a.m. & 7:30 p.m.; May 18, 5:30 p.m., utahsymphony.org

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moreESSENTIALS

SPECIAL EVENTS FESTIVALS & FAIRS

1000 Lights Water Lantern Festival Lindon Marina, 4400 W. Vineyard Road, Vineyard, May 18, 5:30-9:30 p.m., 1000lights.com Bhutanese Cultural Event Shree Krishna Temple, 3370 S. 965 East, May 18, 10 a.m.-2:30 p.m., bcinutah.org Celebrate Israel Festival Jewish Community Center, 2 N. Medical Drive, May 19, noon-2 p.m., slcjcc.org Chalk Art Festival Main Street, Bountiful, May 15-18, 10 a.m.-6 p.m., bountifulmainstreet.com Living Traditions Festival Library Square, 400 S. 200 East, May 17, 5-10 p.m.; May 18, noon-10 p.m.; May 19, noon-7 p.m., livingtraditionsfestival.com (see p. 14) Ramadan Celebration Marmalade Library, 280 W. 500 North, May 21, 6-9 p.m., slcpl.org SLUG Mag’s Brewstillery Trolley Square, 600 S. 700 East, May 18, 2-7:30 p.m., slugmag.com

LGBTQ

1 to 5 Club Brunch Squatters, 147 W. Broadway, third Saturdays, 10:30-11:30 a.m., utahpridecenter.org 1 to 5 Club: Radical Reading Group Utah Pride Center, 1380 S. Main, third Mondays, 7:30-9 p.m., utahpridecenter.org Live Literately After Party & Drag Show Club Try-Angles, 251 W. 900 South, May 18, 7-10 p.m., clubtryangles.com Matrons of Mayhem: Drag Queen Bingo First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East, May 17, 7 p.m., facebook.com/matronsofmayhem Ms. & Mr. Leather SL,UT Meet & Greet Sun Trapp, 102 S. 600 West, May 17, 7-10 p.m., facebook.com/thesuntrapp Mr. & Ms. Leather SL,UT Titleholder Contests Metro Music Hall, 615 W. 100 South, May 19, 8 p.m., utahleatherpride.net Pride Spectacular Union Event Center, 235 N. 500 West, May 17, 6-9:30 p.m., utahpridecenter.org (see p. 14) Utah Leather Pride Sun Trapp & Metro Music Hall, 600 West and 100 South, May 19, noon-8 p.m., utahleatherpride.net Utah LGBTQ Chamber of Commerce Breakfast Utah Pride Center, 1380 S. Main, third Thursdays, 7:30-9 a.m., utahgaychamber.com The Viva La Diva Show: Once Upon a Diva!

Metro Music Hall, 615 W. 100 South, May 18-19, 8 p.m., thevivaladivashow.com

COMPLETE LISTINGS ONLINE AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

TALKS & LECTURES

Brown Bag Lecture Series: Paisley Rekdal: West: A Poem of the Transcontinental Railroad State Archives, 346 S. Rio Grande St., May 22, noon, history.utah.gov Cold: Susan Powell Case Files: The Untold Story Podcast Live Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main, May 16, 4 & 8 p.m., artsaltlake.org (see p. 14) Dr. Jeff Packer: Language of Story: German Gale Center of History and Culture, 10300 S. Beckstead Lane, South Jordan, May 16, 6 p.m., storycrossroads.com Last Podcast on the Left Eccles Theater, 131 S. Main, May 19, 8 p.m., artsaltlake.org Noa Baum: A Land Twice Promised: An Israeli Woman’s Quest for Peace Gale Center of History and Culture, 10300 S. Beckstead Lane, May 16, 7 p.m., storycrossroads.com

VISUAL ART ART EVENTS

Salt Lake Gallery Stroll Various locations in SLC, May 17, 6-9 p.m., gallerystroll.org

GALLERIES & MUSEUMS

300 Plates Art Access Gallery, 230 S. 500 West, through June 7, accessart.org Andy Taylor: New Paintings A Gallery, 1321 S. 2100 East, through June 15, agalleryonline.com Celine Downen, Michah Payan & Miroslava K. Vomela: Krome Downtown Artist Collective, 258 E. 100 South, through June 14, downtownartistcollective.org Claire Taylor: Transcendence by Observation UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, through May 25, utahmoca.org David LeCheminant: Icons Finch Lane Gallery, 54 S. Finch Lane, through June 7, saltlakearts.org Horacio Rodriguez: Un(Invited) Collaborations with My Ancestors Finch Lane Gallery, 54 S. Finch Lane, through June 7, saltlakearts.org Intermountain Healthcare Art Therapy Young Artists: See Me UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, through June 1, utahmoca.org The International Tolerance Project Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, through June 23, umfa.utah.edu Jiyoun Lee-Lodge: Waterman the Stranger Alice Gallery, 617 E. South Temple, through July 5, artsandmuseums.utah.gov Karen Millar Kendall: A Collective Tapestry Downtown Artist Collective, 258 E. 100 South, through May 19, downtownartistcollective.org New West Modern West Fine Art, 412 S. 700 West, through June 8, modernwestfineart.com Parker Jones: From My Seat in the Dirt Kimball Art Center, 638 Park Ave., Park City, through June 2, kimballartcenter.org The Race to Promontory Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, through May 26, umfa.utah.edu salt 14: Yang Yongliang Utah Museum of Fine Arts, 410 Campus Center Drive, through June 2, umfa.utah.edu Shady Acres UMOCA, 20 S. West Temple, through May 25, utahmoca.org Star Wars: Heroes and Villains Urban Arts Gallery, 116 S. Rio Grande St., through June 2, urbanartsgallery.org (see p. 17) Tatiana Varela: Batik Art Red Butte Garden, 300 S. Wakara Way, through May 26, redbuttegarden.org

FILM REVIEW

Out in Africa

CINEMA

SCOTT

Renshaw

Rafiki explores a lesbian coming-of-age in a place where being gay is a crime.

BY SCOTT RENSHAW scottr@cityweekly.net @scottrenshaw

FILM MOVEMENT

T

Sheila Munyiva, left, and Samantha Mugatsia in Rafiki other story developments, and while the consequences of the actions involved are always clear, it’s hard not to wish for a bit more narrative meat on Rafiki’s structural bones.

It’s fortunate, then, that Mugatsia’s performance keeps Rafiki grounded, especially as Kena’s story becomes about her determination to transcend her prescribed societal place in ways beyond whom she’ll be allowed to love. A flash-forward epilogue allows us to see a life that Kena has made for herself, even as some people refuse to accept that life. The irony of this coda is that its optimism—providing a vision of Kena getting something akin to a happy ending while living as her authentic self—is what really inspired the Kenyan government’s ban of the film. Apparently, it’s acceptable to show people being gay if they’re punished for their transgressions; it’s something else entirely to suggest that fulfillment is possible for those who have stopped pretending that their most profound connections can be captured by the word “friend.” CW

Springtime at

Glover Nursery

RAFIKI

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BBB Samantha Mugatsia Sheila Munyiva Jimmi Gathu NR

PAIRS WITH Circumstance (2011) Sarah Kazemy Nikohl Boosheri R

Call Me Kuchu (2012) Documentary NR

God Loves Uganda (2013) Documentary NR

Mon-Sat 8am-7pm Sunday 10am-5pm 9275 S 1300 W 801-562-5496 glovernursery.com

MAY 16, 2019 | 19

Madame Satã (2002) Lázaro Ramos Marcelia Cartaxo NR

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conservative Christian culture that means Kena is always hearing ministers preach about her corrupt nature.

Yet at its core, this is a character piece about a young woman’s coming-out/coming-of-age, and on that level it’s mostly effective. Mugatsia’s performance captures Kena’s watchfulness at how far she can push her unconventional ways—refusing to wear dresses; hanging out and playing soccer with her male friends, including one (Neville Misati) who clearly has a romantic interest in her—before it becomes dangerous. There’s a potent early scene in which Kena hears one of her other male friends viciously insulting a gay man from their town, making it clear what kind of response she could expect if she ever decided to be open about her sexuality. It’s a bit of a shame that Ziki is never as well-developed a character as Kena; we get glimpses of her desire to avoid the expected Kenyan gender roles of wife and mother, but more often she feels like a dream girl in rainbow braids to fulfill Kena’s fantasies.

In fairness, that skimpy character development feels in part like a function of having a short story as source material. Rafiki zips through its story in a brisk 83 minutes, giving the relationship between Kena and Ziki only a few scenes to evolve from complete strangers to lovers, though the romantic scenes are shot with a graceful recognition of general awkward inexperience and the line that’s being crossed. It all builds to a genuinely unsettling sequence involving a mob gaybashing attack that comes just as quickly as

CONGRATULATIONS TO SCOTT RENSHAW, FIRST OF HIS NAME AND PROTECTOR OF THE A&E REALM, WHO THIS WEEK CELEBRATES 20 YEARS WITH CITY WEEKLY. HERE’S TO MANY MORE!

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

he title of Wanuri Kahiu’s Kenyan drama Rafiki comes from the Swahili word for “friend”—and if ever there were a simple word that could be more contextually loaded, it’s that one.

That’s because Rafiki is a story about the relationship between two gay women in a neighborhood on the outskirts of Nairobi, in a country where homosexuality is still against the law—and where this film was banned. They’re part of a culture that still requires such a couple to euphemistically refer to a partner as a “friend” because the consequences of being open are too severe.

Kahiu—adapting Monica Arac de Nyeko’s short story “Jambula Tree”—dives right into that culture in her story of Kena Mwaura (Samantha Mugatsia), a tomboyish teenager living with her single mother while working in the store owned by her remarried father, John (Jimmi Gathu). She becomes interested in Ziki Okemi (Sheila Munyiva), the daughter of Kena’s father’s opponent in an impending election for assemblyman. While their respective families question this “friendship” because of how it might appear politically, Kena and Ziki quickly grow more intimately connected than anyone realizes.

Part of Rafiki’s effectiveness as a narrative comes from the way it layers on the impediments to the protagonists’ relationship, beginning with that simple-but-time-tested Romeo & Juliet-esque notion of Kena and Ziki as from two rival families. Kahiu builds a rich sense of the kind of place where everybody is watching you and ready to spread rumors—a phenomenon certainly not unique to Kenya, but given a cultural specificity in the food counter owner who delights in her role as curator of the local gossip. We get a clear idea of the tension and moral judgment that already fill Kena’s home, as her mother (Nini Wacera) stews in anguish over having been abandoned by Kena’s father, and of the

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20 | MAY 16, 2019

CINEMA CLIPS MOVIE TIMES AND LOCATIONS AT CITYWEEKLY.NET

NEW THIS WEEK Film release schedules are subject to change. Reviews online at cityweekly.net A DOG’S JOURNEY BB It’s doesthedogdie.com: The Movie. Yes, the dog dies. Over and over again, in fact. That’s no spoiler and kind of the whole point of this sappy “tail,” a sequel to 2017’s A Dog’s Purpose, about a boy, Ethan, who grew into Dennis Quaid and was cute-stalked through his entire life by a dog called Bailey (the voice of Josh Gad). Every time the dog died and was reborn into a different doggy body, he (or occasionally, she) tried to get back to Ethan. Here, Ethan commands the latest reincarnation of Bailey—Ethan has sorta caught on to what’s happening—to watch over his step-granddaughter, CJ (Kathryn Prescott). Movies don’t get more inoffensive than this, in which there isn’t anything that a canine friend cannot put right, from grief and trauma to potentially fatal illness—such as cancer, as CJ’s bestie Trent (adorable Henry Lau) endures. People might suffer the biggest, most profound of problems, and yet all is put right as long as a dog is by one’s side. Is that even inaccurate, though? I’m not crying, you’re crying. Opens May 17 at theaters valleywide. (PG)—MaryAnn Johanson JOHN WICK: CHAPTER 3 — PARABELLUM [not yet reviewed] Lots of people want ex-assassin John Wick (Keanu Reeves) dead; expect him to avoid death, and cause it, in creative ways.

Opens May 17 at theaters valleywide. (R)

THE SUN IS ALSO A STAR [not yet reviewed] Adaptation of the Nicola Yoon novel about two students (Yara Shahidi and Charles Melton) who begin a romantic relationship.

Opens May 17 at theaters valleywide. (PG-13) SAUVAGE / WILD BBB Léo (Félix Maritaud) appears to be at a doctor’s appointment at the outset of Camille Vidal-Naquet’s gritty character study—but it’s a roleplay, part of 22-year-old Léo’s life as a gay sex worker in Strasbourg, France. The narrative that follows is mostly episodic, following the illiterate, for-all-practical-purposes homeless Léo through his days and nights picking up tricks and his unrequited infatuation with fellow prostitute Ahd (Eric Bernard). Vidal-Naquet creates a compassionate portrait of the community of mutual support among these sex workers, who warn each other about potentially violent clients and roust the Serbian immigrants trying to undercut their prices. Yet mostly it offers a bleak vision of Léo’s life facing health problems, hunger and the prospect of dangerous encounters, while it’s obvious that all he wants is some kind of human connection.

Maritaud’s performance evokes that mix of streetwise kid and eager puppy, and even as some of the individual episodes begin to feel repetitive, it’s hard not to feel compassion for someone who needs someone to hold him, but might not believe he deserves to be held.

Opens May 17 at theaters valleywide. (NR)—Scott Renshaw TRIAL BY FIRE [not yet reviewed] Fact-based drama about a man facing the death penalty in spite of possible exonerating evidence. Opens May 17 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (R) WILD NIGHTS WITH EMILY BBB There are two things I know about Emily Dickinson: She was a reclusive spinster, and many of her poems can be sung to the tune of “Yellow Rose of Texas.” The second thing, which is definitely

true, is addressed in Madeleine Olnek’s deadpan biopic that details, tongue-in-cheek, how the first thing probably isn’t. Turns out Emily (Molly Shannon, played with apt nervous spaciness) had a romantic relationship with her brother’s wife, Susan (Susan Ziegler), while her brother was cheating with Mabel Todd (Amy Seimetz), who would posthumously publish Emily’s work after erasing all of the poet’s references to “Sue.” Olnek wants to set the record straight (as it were) about Emily’s life and personality, but does so in the style of Drunk History: historical facts mixed with comedy. A potential publisher of Emily’s poems (Brett Gelman) is a fatuous, “woke” feminist; Emily and Susan (and the film itself) mock the shallow verses of Helen Hunt Jackson, then called “America’s greatest lady poet,” with modern causticity, albeit expressed in the formal, contraction-less language of the 1880s. It’s altogether more charming and sweet than you might expect an Emily Dickinson biography to be. Opens May 17 at Broadway Centre Cinemas. (NR)—Eric D. Snider

SPECIAL SCREENINGS AMAZING GRACE At Park City Film Series, May 17-18, 8 p.m.; May 19, 6 p.m. (G) RAFIKI BBB See review on p. 19. At Main Library, May 21, 7 p.m. (NR)

CURRENT RELEASES AVENGERS: ENDGAME BBB Joe and Anthony Russo get to deliver what no other Marvel film has been able to offer: an actual ending. In the aftermath of Thanos’ (Josh Brolin) big snap that erased half of all creation, the surviving Avengers—including Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.) and Captain America (Chris Evans)—are left to pick up the pieces and maybe even try to set things right. The first act shows an impressive willingness to let an elegiac tone settle in before it’s time for the big action stuff. It’s an awfully busy center section, bouncing between characters and locations in a way that isn’t always graceful. Yes,

there’s a climactic battle, but it’s really about what happens after that battle. Those satisfying epilogues are for viewers who have stuck with the franchise for 11 years. (PG-13)—SR

HAIL SATAN? BBB Penny Lane’s documentary about the contemporary Satanic Temple and its challenges to Christian symbolism in public spaces conveys the principles underlying what amounts to masterful trolling. Lane provides useful historical context—including the “satanic panic” of the 1980s—while providing an enigmatic character study of the Satanic Temple’s puckish leader, Lucien Greaves. There’s also material involving some internal dissent within the organization, which serves to make them more normal than their provocative name would suggest and bumps up against their stunts like performing a “conversion to gay” ritual at the gravesite of notoriously homophobic pastor Fred Phelps’ mother. Mostly, it’s an entertaining and engaging look at whether the principles underlying an organization—in this case, tenets upholding reason, compassion and individual liberty—are more important than whatever button-pushing name that organization might choose for itself. (R)—SR

POKÉMON: DETECTIVE PIKACHU BBB.5 Rarely has a clear cashing-in movie turned out so downright adorable. This kiddie noir posits a lovely world where Pokémon and humans live in companionable harmony in Ryme City. But intrigue has struck! Human Tim’s (Justice Smith) cop dad has gone missing, so he teams up with Dad’s Pokémon partner, a fuzzy yellow Pikachu (the voice of Ryan Reynolds, reining in his usual smarm), to find him. Their task is made somewhat easier by the strange fact that Tim and the Pikachu can understand each other, which isn’t usually the case with humans and Pokémon. The ensuing mystery is gentle enough for little’uns, but packs enough satirical bite for imaginative grownups. And it all works even if you don’t know the first thing about Pokémon. As Detective Pikachu himself might say, you will feel it in your jellies. (PG)—MAJ

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Summer is COMING

OUR ANNUAL CELEBRATION OF ALL THINGS FUN IN THE SUN IS HERE! s it hot in here or is it just the natural hot springs under the Great Keep? In any case, send a raven, summer has come!

Well, technically, not till June 21, but we figured we’d serve up an insiders’ take and give you an all-knowing three-eyed raven’s bird’s-eye view to all things fun-in-the-sun. (Yes, we thought long and hard about these GoT references.)

What’s your idea of a perfect summer day?

Perhaps checking out an arts festival or outdoor concert? You’ll find inspiration here. How about setting up camp, hitting the trails and sipping on a frosty local ale? Aye, that’s in here, too. Spoiler alert: You’ll also find a local authors spotlight, a rundown of the best places to ride your e-dragon, er ... scooter, and nary a mention of twincest.

Be still, my stoneheart!

While the hit HBO series might be ending, talk

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of multiple spin-offs is stronger than anti-Daenerys backlash, so why not daydream that some scenes could be shot right here in our own backyard? “My show is about castles and medieval cities, and there aren’t many castles in New Mexico, sad to say,” the grand maester himself, George R.R. Martin, told me in Santa Fe back in 2013. Well, George, a white castle towers over this capital city’s skyline, so, keep your options open.

But, hold the door, there’s more! Think: a longdistance running primer for jesters, a comprehensive farmers market directory and a lion’s share of al fresco dining options.

We’re not sure if songs will be written about this special issue or not, but in the end, we hope it inspires you to get out, explore and bask under the scorching sun of the Seven Kingdoms (Or, you know, the 29 counties).

MAY 16, 2019 | 21

—Enrique Stormborn of House Limón, the First of His Name, the Ruler of Newsroom Staffers and First Freelancers, the Keeper of the Red Pen, the Lord of 248 S. Main St., the Unsunburnt, the Breaker of Run-On Sentences.

22 | MAY 16, 2019

GoT SLC

The Maiden Fairs

IN THE

Squint hard enough, and these destinations could easily double for Thrones locations.

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alt Lake City haunts are more of a natural fit for wholesome productions like High School Musical and the forthcoming The Other Side of Heaven 2, but beneath its gleaming surface, a fair amount of Flea Bottom-approved grit can be found across our gilded town. Sure, some locations below are peppered with Old Nan’s breed of creative license, but there’s no denying the Greyjoys would feel right at home on the shores of the Great Salt Lake; Park City gets as cold as North of the Wall; and if there’s one eatery in the known world that could cater a feast in Winterfell’s Great Hall, it would be Chuck-A-Rama. So why in the seven hells not?

Salt Lake Temple Dominating the capital city’s skyline, it’s the seat of the King of the Andals and the First Missionaries. With its impenetrable walls (unless you’re lucky enough to be a recommendcarrying member), the monolithic LDS temple could easily be cast as SLC’s version of the Red Keep. Bonus points: Rumor has it its cellars are home to the great Jell-O molds of Relief Society presidents past.

Ogden Walnut Tree Just off Park Boulevard grows an imposing English walnut tree, thought to be the oldest in the state. It’s not a far stretch to think of the urban deciduous specimen as the Beehive’s equivalent of a sacred Weirwood. And an even shorter stretch to imagine that against it, Orrin Hatch was awarded immortality at the hands of the elfin Children of the Ward.

Gilgal Sculpture Garden Tucked away near the corner of 700 East and 500 South, the diminutive public park is chock-full of lore and whimsy. With its central statue of founder and visionary Thomas Battersby Child Jr., as well as a sphinx topped with Joseph Smith’s head, it could easily serve as the local version of the Crypts of Winterfell. For the love of everything holy, the Night King should deffo keep away.

Bonneville Salt Flats Think of it as Utah’s version of Vaes Dothrak. Known for playing host to numerous land speed records, hordes of motorsports enthusiasts descend upon the 30,000-acre salt pan each year, and hoot and holler at metal steeds racing at otherworldly speeds. Yes, the barren expanse is considerably whiter than the Great Grass Sea, but then again, everything is whiter in Utah.

—Enrique Limón

… AND SOME ESTABLISHED ONES, TOO.

By Scott Renshaw

very year, the warm weather brings along with it a cornucopia of opportunities to experience concentrated doses of artistic expression. Whether it’s bingeing theatrical productions, taking in the arts and crafts of various cultures or seeing work by dozens of visual artists, you can get a taste of almost everything somewhere this summer. Get out your calendars, and carve out some time to support local creators.

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THEATER FESTS Tuacahn: Fans of Disney musicals are bound to be in heaven, as Tuacahn’s glorious red-rock amphitheater hosts both Disney’s The Little Mermaid and the Disney songbook roundup Disney’s When You Wish.

But the musical memories don’t stop there. The season also includes the beloved The Sound of Music and the multi-Tony Award-nominated The Gentleman’s Guide to Love and Murder. A season package is the perfect way to enjoy some of the greatest tunes you’ve always loved. 1100 Tuacahn Drive, Ivins, May 24-Oct. 24, tuacahn.org Utah Shakespeare Festival: Celebrate the Bard in Southern Utah, even as you immerse yourself in the great art of theater. This season’s Shakespeare productions include the tragedy power-pairing of Macbeth and Hamlet, plus Twelfth Night and Henry VI, Parts II & III. You can get a bonus dose of Elizabethan-themed fun with the comedy The Book of Will, about friends of the recently deceased Shakespeare trying to preserve his writing legacy. Arthur Miller’s The Price, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat and Every Brilliant Thing round out the season. 195 W. Center St., Cedar City, June 27-Oct. 12, bard.org Utah Festival Opera & Musical Theatre: Make your way to Logan, and get a sense for the wide range of emotions that can be created by the pairing of music with theatrical performance. Family-friendly musical theater in the Broadway tradition includes Disney’s Newsies and Mary Poppins, plus the classic West Side Story; for a sample of vintage opera, enjoy Mozart’s The Marriage of Figaro. There’s even a couple of opera-themed plays in Terrence McNally’s Master Class and William Luce’s Bravo, Caruso. Make time for special events like silent films and the annual International Vocal Competition. Ellen Eccles Theater, 43 S. Main, Logan, July 5-Aug. 2, utahfestival.org

ARTS FESTIVALS Moab Arts Festival: Memorial Day Weekend is a perfect time to revel in Moab’s spectacular scenery, and enjoying art is just a bonus. Artist booths present painting, sculpture, woodworking, jewelry and more, while scheduled live performances include music from Quicksand Soup, Meander Cat and the Vitals, plus Grassroots Shakespeare doing Henry V and The Little Mermaid (not at the same time). Swanny Park, 400 N. 100 West, Moab, May 25-26, moabartsfestival.org Queer Spectra Arts Festival: This inaugural event looks to showcase art from a wide variety of LGBTQ perspectives. Experience a 2D and 3D art gallery, live performances and installations, plus panels and discussions on topics related to the intersection between queer identity and art. Commonwealth Studios, 150 W. Commonwealth Ave., May 25, 1-10 p.m., queerspectra.com Ogden Arts Festival: Ogden showcases local artists, plus plenty of family-friendly activities and live performances, at historic Union Station. Union Station, 2501 Wall Ave., June 8-9, ogdenartsfestival.com

COURTESY UTAH RENAISSANCE FAIRE

Utah Renaissance Faire

Utah Arts Festival: No other single event brings together so many different kinds of creativity, with so many guests ready to enjoy it all. Visual arts booths fill two blocks of downtown SLC, with a schedule serving up dance, street theater, writing workshops, short films and dozens of musical acts. Headliners include New York-based ska band The Slackers, folk artist Christine Lavin and Colorado four-piece string band Head for the Hills. Library Square, 200 S. 400 East, June 20-23, uaf.org Park City Kimball Arts Festival: By the time the dog days of August roll around, you’ll be itching for an excuse to get out of the valley into the cooler mountain air. Park City’s annual arts festival—supporting the Kimball Art Center—takes over Main Street, for a full weekend of booths showcasing local and national artists, wonderful food and live music performances. Historic Main Street, Park City, Aug. 2-4, parkcitykimballartsfestival.org

CULTURAL FESTIVALS

MAY 16, 2019 | 23

Living Traditions Festival: See p. 14.

Scandinavian Heritage Festival: If you’ve ever wondered about the history behind Utah’s plethora of Hansens, Andersens and Jensens, Ephraim is the place. A full weekend of activities includes plenty of storytelling, live music, craft and food booths, family activities and a Friday night fireworks show. Various venues, Ephraim, May 24-25, scandinavianfestival.org Utah Scottish Festival & Highland Games: Scottish culture in Utah is on display during a weekend of bagpipe performance and highland dancing, but don’t miss the athletic events that make this a real one-of-a-kind spectacle. In the ancient tradition of clan competitions, witness caber toss, hammer throw, stone toss and other feats of strength. Utah State Fairpark, 155 N. 1000 West, June 7-9, utahscots.org Venezuela Festival: Celebrating the culture, traditions and history of Venezuela, this event includes food, arts-and-crafts, vendors and live music

performances, with headliner Jerry Rivera, “El Baby de la Salsa.” All that, plus the “Miss Venezuela 2019” pageant. Vincit Amor Event Center, 993 S. Bending River Road, June 26, noon-11 p.m., bit.ly/2vTd2G3 NACIP Powwow & Festival: While much of the state celebrates the arrival of white pioneers on July 24, Utah’s indigenous populations celebrates those for whom this was the place for generations before 1847. Experience traditional singing and dancing, plus food, family activities and fireworks. Liberty Park, 600 E. 900 South, June 24 Rocky Mountain Elk Festival: The national convention of the Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation incorporates two events into this inaugural Park City showcase. While the Elk Camp is open to RMEF members with registration, the Elk Festival is a free event open to the public, full of unique activities like cooking demonstrations, archery challenge, a traveling conservation exhibit featuring some of largest bull elk from across North America, and even the World Elk Calling Championship featuring more than 100 competitors going for more than $14,000 in prizes. Canyons Village, Park City, July 11-14, rmef.org Mega Peruvian Festival: The melding of Spanish and indigenous cultures—plus those of more recent immigrants—gets a grand party at Library Plaza, featuring folklore, original art, live music and plenty of amazing food. Library Plaza, 210 E. 400 South, July 26-27, 6-11 p.m., facebook.com/fiestas.delperu Utah Renaissance Faire: Live your own olde tyme adventure with enough authentic flavor to make you wonder whether dragons are right around the corner. Wandering minstrels, mages and fire performers provide the atmosphere throughout the festival grounds, as well as live jousting exhibitions by the Knights of Mayhem, armored combat, an authentic Viking village, food vendors and live Celtic music. Plus, more family-friendly activities than you would ever find on a Game of Thrones episode. Thanksgiving Point Electric Park, 3003 N. Thanksgiving Way, Lehi, Aug. 23-24, utahrenfaire.org Greek Festival: For the 44th year, Utah’s Greek community shares its wealth of cultural treasures with guests of all backgrounds, giving us all a chance to sample authentic food, experience traditional dance performances and tour the Hellenic Cultural Museum. 279 S. 300 West, Sept. 6-8, saltlakegreekfestival.com

24 | MAY 16, 2019

Beehive Scribes LOOK OUT GRRM, THESE LOCAL AUTHORS HOLD THEIR OWN.

By Amanda Rock

onsider yourself warned. Famous authors live in our realm and you could run into them grocery shopping or grabbing a bite to eat. Don’t panic. Be cool. Authors are totally normal people and why wouldn’t wouldn’t you see them at Smiths? Should you ask for their autograph? A selfie? Gush about their latest novel? Ask if they still believe Bran is the Night King? Probably. Here are five to watch out for:

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Shannon Hale You don’t have to explain what fry sauce is to Shannon Hale. This New York Times bestselling author is a Salt Lake City native. More than 25 books are in her roster, including Princess Academy, which won the prestigious Newbery Honor award. Along with husband Dean Hale (who also calls SLC home), she writes the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl novels. Hale’s books feature awesome female characters and she writes them for everyone to read—girls, boys, kids, teens and adults. She’s a champion for equal reading rights, fighting gender bias whenever she can. shannonhale.com

Gabriel Tallent When Celeste Ng and Stephen King rave about your first novel, you know you’ve made it. My Absolute Darling by Gabriel Tallent is heartbreaking, beautiful and impossible to put down. The most talked about book of 2017, My Absolute Darling received stellar reviews and it was the first debut novel to appear on the best-seller lists in the U.S. and U.K. at the same time. Raised on the Mendocino coast by his two mothers, Tallent now resides in Salt Lake City. gabrieltallent.com

Paisley Rekdal The Utah Poet Laureate is required reading for locals of all stripes. Besides poetry, the University of Utah English professor also pens novels and essays.

Rekdal’s work has appeared in The New York Times Magazine, American Poetry Review and The New Republic, among other popular publications. She’s received a Guggenheim Fellowship as well as other distinguished awards.

Nightingale, her newest collection of poems, will be published this spring. paisleyrekdal.com

Jessica Day George New York Times best-selling author Jessica Day George also put down roots in SLC with her husband and three kids. She writes compelling fantasy books and fairy tales for young adults and adult-adults who appreciate a good story about debutantes in 1890s who travel to Romania and maybe become servants to the Draculas. (Pick up a copy of Silver in the Blood and let’s read it together!) In 2007, she won the Whitney Award for Best Book by a New Author for Dragon Slippers. jessicadaygeorge.com

James A. McLaughlin OK, you’re less likely to run into James A. McLaughlin, as I think he prefers the mountains to the city. Relocating to the Wasatch Range east of Salt Lake from rural Virginia where he grew up, McLaughlin is an avid photographer, capturing landscapes and wildlife. Bearskin, his first novel, has been nominated for both the Edgar and Barry awards for best first novel. Set in the Appalachians of Virginia, Bearskin is an action-packed thriller written with a naturalist’s voice. He’s currently working on two novels related to Bearskin. jamesamclaughlin.com

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Campfire & Blood

WANT TO SPEND MORE TIME IN THE GREAT OUTDOORS, BUT NOT SURE WHERE TO START? WE’VE GOT YOUR BACK.

By Naomi Clegg

ou’ve gone on a few hikes, done a little car camping, and you want to go harder. Bigger. Deeper. Wait, that’s not what I meant at all. Let’s start over. You’ve gone on a few hikes and you want to step up your outdoors game. Now what? The next step is backpacking, also known as the process of putting your shelter and sustenance on your literal back and toughing it out in the wilderness for a minimum of one night and a maximum of forever nights. But since it’s your first time, let’s maybe stick to one or two.

The first time I went backpacking, I set out at twilight and hiked maybe two miles up an isolated, quickly darkening trail. About 20 minutes in, I realized I didn’t know whether this was cougar territory, and from then on assumed every rustle was the beginning of a vicious animal attack. My toes were so cold that I couldn’t fall asleep until 4 a.m. When I woke up, a snowstorm had hit. I hope you don’t have this experience your first time out.

Since I clearly did it the hard way, I chatted up an unassuming REI employee for some advice—thank you, Morgan, for your assistance.

I am sure you, dear reader, have a much better sense than I did, but nevertheless, there are some things you need to know before you go. Shall we?

Need to know: The basics

What to bring: The gear list • A backpack • A tent • Hiking boots • A sleeping bag rated for at least 10 degrees below the projected low temp • A camp stove plus fuel • More food than you think you need • A headlight or flashlight • Water bottles or a reservoir bag • Layers. Bring extra clothes.

• Map, compass, GPS • A small first-aid kit • A lighter or matches • A pocket knife • Sun and insect protection Things that are very close to necessary but that you perhaps won’t die without: • A little shovel • Ziplocks and trash bags • Good wool socks • Four sporks • At least one trekking pole or hiking stick • Hand sanitizer and wipes.

• A good book, a journal and a pencil P.S. Wondering where to get all this gear? Start one piece at a time. REI Co-op (locations in Salt Lake and Sandy) holds a garage sale several times a year. Recreation Outlet (3160 S. State) offers, as one Yelp reviewer puts it, some “sick deals” on gear from second-tier brands. Kirkham’s Outdoor Products (3125 S. State) is pricier, but offers highquality gear, including their own line of canvas tents.

Where to go: 3 local destinations for first-time backpackers Wasatch Range: Lake Desolation Starting at the Mill D trailhead in Big Cottonwood Canyon, you’ll hike about 3 ½ miles through aspen and pine groves and meadows of wildflowers. The name belies the beauty of the lake, which is, if not super busy, far from desolate. Just make sure you camp at least 200 feet from the lake.

Wasatch Range: Lake Blanche Another Alpine lake, and it’s lovely. It’s about 3 ½ miles to the lake from the Mill B South Fork Trailhead in Big Cottonwood Canyon. Leave time to explore the natural playground that surrounds the lake.

Uintas: Amethyst Lake I really love hiking to lakes, clearly—arriving at a big bowl of water is a tangible reward that makes all your hard work seem worth it. This hike in the Uintas is best done over the course of two or three days if you’re just starting out. It’s 13 miles roundtrip, but there’s quite a bit of elevation gain.

You’ll find plenty of places to camp along the way.

Start at the Christmas Meadows Trailhead. The permit fee is $6. Smaller lakes, waterfalls, meadows and coniferous trees dot the trail. Consider setting up a base camp halfway up the trail your first night and day-hiking to the lake and back to base on day two.

MAY 16, 2019 | 27

Safety first, kids! Know where you’re going.

Research camping options before you set out and make sure you follow the guidelines, which vary. (Do you need to reserve a campsite? Camp a certain distance from trails and roads? Camp only at existing campsites?) Always bring a map, compass and GPS. I don’t own a GPS because I spent all my money on a tent, but Morgan tells me they are worth it, and there are even devices that can send emergency text messages in your time of need. Also, tell a friend or family member where you’ll be and when you expect to be back. Leave a note under your car seat with your itinerary, too.

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

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The Lord of Fright

CONQUER YOUR FEARS AND TACKLE THAT ADRENALINE BUCKET LIST.

By Scott Renshaw

inter in Utah is so inextricably linked to the thrills of skiing, snowboarding and other winter sports that it’s easy to forget that the excitement doesn’t need to end with the spring thaw. There’s no need to put your jones for adrenaline on hold for six months—not when the state is filled with opportunities to try out other activities that can really get the blood pumping. If you’ve got yourself an “adrenaline bucket list” of stuff you’d like to try, there’s no time like the present. Here’s a look at some of those activities, organized for different comfort levels so that you can find your sweet spot between baby-steps and death-defying.

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INTERMEDIATE LEVEL

EXPERT LEVEL

Zipline Utah Everyone wants to experience what it’s like to fly; while you work your way up to it, try starting by remaining firmly attached to something. Many locations offer zipline experiences, but Zipline Utah serves up some of the longest experiences in the world, including the Screaming Falcon Full Tour: a 3,900-foot-plus swoop over Rainbow Bay, plus seven suspension aerial bridges, and additional lines, for a total of two miles enjoying spectacular views while never touching the ground. Shorter zips and kid-appropriate options are also available; reservations only.

Deer Creek State Park, Highway 89, Mile Marker 22, ziplineutah.com Deer Creek Island Resorts Wakeboard Clinics Utah’s beautiful lakes and reservoirs are a great place to experience the daredevil sensation of treating a wave of water like a skateboard halfpipe. Even if you’ve never been pulled behind a boat on anything before, you can learn everything you need to know at Deer Creek Island Resorts wakeboard clinics. Individual sessions are a one-hour, one-on-one intensive personal introduction to the sport; group clinics are also available for a more cost-effective option. There are even specialty clinics for pre-teen riders and for women only. Highway 89, Deer Creek Reservoir, deercreekislandresort.com High Country Adventure Provo River Tubing The experience of navigating down the state’s rivers, fresh from the melting Rocky Mountain snows, evokes a sense of adventurous discovery, almost as though you’re seeing the world the way 19th-century explorers did. If you’re not quite ready yet for the whitest of white water, but still in decent physical shape and with solid swimming ability, try floating along the Provo River with friends on heavy-duty tubes. Experiences include life jackets and basic river navigation instruction, plus a shuttle back to your point of origin, with discounts for larger groups. 3702 E. Provo Canyon Road, Provo, highcountryadventure.com

Hang Gliding and Paragliding The conditions at Point of the Mountain are legendary as one of the world’s best spots to learn—and perfect—the art of hang gliding or paragliding, providing the smooth winds that make for ideal learning. The area is home to multiple schools and companies that provide equipment, as well as experiences perfect for every comfort level. Try out a tandem flight to get a feel for soaring with a professional instructor, then take the lessons needed to be able to manage sustained flights on your own. Check with the Utah Hang Gliding and Paragliding Association to find the preparation that’s right for you. uhgpga.org Zion Adventures Waterfall Rappelling Feel like experiencing the splendor of Southern Utah’s red rock country in an unexpected way? How about descending into secluded canyons while waterfalls lap at your feet? If you’re in shape for a 9-11 hour day, get a glimpse of rarely-seen, privately-owned areas as you experience 9-10 rappels along a 400-foot waterfall to the bottom. The adventure includes a mandatory ground school clinic, and a sense for taking the road—or the canyon—less traveled.

36 Lion Blvd., Springdale, zionadventures.com Sky Dive Utah OK, no more messing around: It’s time to jump right the hell out of that plane. Only 25 miles west of downtown Salt Lake City, you can build up to your solo experience with a tandem jump with an instructor, getting amazing views of the Great Salt Lake and surrounding areas.

That 60-second freefall before opening the parachute might seem like an eternity, but once you’re getting instructed on how to control and maneuver your way to the ground, you’ll wonder why it took you so long to get started. 4647 N. Airport Road, Erda, skydiveutah.com

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BEGINNER LEVEL The wAIRhouse Trampoline Park If you’re going to ease your way into the big-time activities, you might as well begin with a reminder of the stuff that thrilled you in your younger years. The wAIRhouse offers a 35,000-square-foot facility full of places to get your bounce on, plus dodgeball courts, slamdunk courts to give you that illusion of NBA legitimacy, and an extreme net course (not included with general admission). If you’re coming with little ones, there are age-appropriate areas for toddlers, and even a lounge area with TVs to take a little break as you work yourself back into thrill-seeking shape. 3653 S. 500 West, wairhouseslc.com Park City Mountain Resort Alpine Coaster Amusement park roller-coasters like those you’d find at Lagoon are a perfectly respectable way of adding a safe sense of danger. But there’s an added touch of spectacle involved in taking that ride down a mountainside. Park City Mountain Resort’s Alpine Coaster winds its way through the summer greenery at speeds up to 25 mph (roughly the equivalent of Disneyland’s Matterhorn Bobsleds). There are height and age restrictions; individual rides are available, but you get the best deal with a summer “adventure pass” that also includes access to the luge-like Alpine slide, climbing wall and much more. 1345 Lowell Ave., Park City, parkcitymountain.com Dive Utah, Bonneville Seabase You say that Utah is a landlocked state, so ocean-type activities are simply impossible here? You have so much to learn. If you’ve ever wanted to learn to SCUBA dive, set up individual or group lessons with Dive Utah (4679 S. 2225 East, Holladay, diveutah.com), with introductory classes and preparations for open-water diving, all right here locally. Or if you’d like the experience of swimming through tropical reefs without major travel expense, take just a short drive to Bonneville Seabase (1600 N. SR 138, Grantsville, seabase.net), where natural springs and natural salinity creates a de facto inland ocean full of fish, available for visitors to dive right in (reservations available).

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Get in the Game

DEREK CARLISLE

Here are a few races around the Wasatch Front you might want to check out through August. (These include races that offer distances longer than 5K.)

A Race of Thrones

LOOKING TO WING YOUR FIRST LONG-DISTANCE RUNNING EVENT? READ ON.

By Ray Howze

o I winged my first half-marathon. Don’t get me wrong. I trained, but for only less than a month ahead of time. Experienced runners and fitness coaches might cringe. “You could be injury prone. Don’t forget to stretch,” I imagined them telling me.

But dammit, I had to set some goal and I figured the Salt Lake Half-Marathon was as good as any. Except I’m also lazy. As a half-baked New Year’s resolution, I said I’d start training for the April 13 race date. Then March 18 rolled around. Still no training. I signed up, though, telling myself if I ran for three days a week, I should be OK. My goal was to simply finish and not necessarily in a certain time.

After I signed up, I started my “training.” 5Ks on Monday, run for an hour on Wednesday and try to go anywhere from 5 to 10 miles on Saturday. To my surprise, it wasn’t as impossible as I imagined.

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Coronation Day

Dracarys Dos and Don’ ts Here are a few tips I learned from my short time as a long-distance runner: Do start training earlier than a month before. Maybe at least six weeks ahead of your race.

Get shoes that feel comfortable. I stopped by Salt Lake Running Co. to get new shoes. The place offers a video analysis of your running so you can get the right kind of fit, as well as a more thorough analysis to understand your “run signature.”

Don’t worry about all the accessories. When it comes down to a race, it’s just putting one foot in front of the other. Air pods? Too fancy. Heart monitors? Sure, if you really need it to monitor your heart rate.

Do take it easy. If you’re not an experienced runner, just focus on reaching your distance first.

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I woke up on race day around 5 a.m. to a fresh layer of Beyond The Wall snow. Yikes. My first long-distance running event and it was going to be cold AF. I’ll admit, if it was raining, I probably would have passed and said, “Not today.” But the weather was clear enough to run.

After the race started, though, there were a few brief uphill climbs to get to 11th Avenue. Hey, I didn’t sign up for this. There was still 12 miles to go and I was afraid I’d wear myself out. But I got that out of the way as quick as possible and headed toward City Creek. Then, a woman passed me power walking faster than I was jogging. Sheesh!

At the beginning, I had to keep telling myself to ignore the others and go at my own pace. I averaged 11:30 per mile. Not fast by any means, but I was going to have to get to 13.1 somehow.

When I made it to South Temple, I was already starting to feel the grind after about 5 miles. To my surprise, though, the people cheering along the route really do help your psyche. I saw a sign that read “Pain is just the

French word for bread.” A little humor helps.

Next came the climb up to 1100 East from 900 East on 800 South. That’s not the steepest part of the hill, but it was uphill nonetheless. I had to walk. And so did just about everyone else.

After that climb, I figured it would be smooth sailing down to Sugar House. But my energy started to drain.

If you’re new to endurance events, you might not be as familiar with those energy gels. But, boy, I took one down at mile 7 and it gave my body the boost it needed.

When I reached mile 10, I had never run farther than that—so this was all new territory. Friends advised me though that at this time, it was going to be adrenaline that carried me the rest of the way. Sure enough, that’s what I needed. I turned the corner to see the finish line and couldn’t believe I was going to finish. My time: 2:30:31.

Plenty of room for improvement. But I think I proved to myself and hopefully to anyone else looking to get in shape, it can be done. Just get started. Set a goal. And you’ll be happy you did. Meanwhile, I’ve already signed up for a full marathon next year. Lord of Light, help me.

Ogden Marathon (Full and Half) May 18, Weber County, ogdenmarathon.com Timp Trail Marathon (Full and Half) May 18, Orem, timptrailmarathon.com Race for Grief (10K) May 27, Bountiful, raceforgrief.com Oquirrh Mountain (Half, 10K) June 1, Tooele, facebook.com/oquirrhmountainhalfmarathon Utah Valley Marathon (Full, Half, 10K) June 1, Provo, utahvalleymarathon.com Corner Canyon Half Marathon (Half, 12K, 6K) June 8, Draper, happytrailsrace.com Drop13 Half Marathon (Half) June 8, Cottonwood Heights, drop13.com Lantern Run (Half, 10K) June 8, Liberty Park Squaw Peak (50 mile) June 8, Provo, squawpeak50.com Butterfield Brawl (10K) June 15, Herriman, rungr8.com Huntsman Hometown Heroes (10K) June 15, Salt Lake City, hope.huntsmancancer.org Wahsatch Steeplechase (17 mile) June 15, Salt Lake City, wahsatchsteeplechase.com American Fork Canyon Run Against Cancer (Half, 10K) June 22, American Fork, afcanyonrun.com Heber Half (Half) June 29, Heber, heberhalf.com Freedom Run (10K) July 4, Provo, freedomfestival.org Riverton Country (10K) July 4, Riverton, rivertoncity.com Park City Trail Series (10K) July 13, Park City, pctrailseries.com Crack of Dawn (8K) Millcreek Canyon, July 20, sports-am.com HandCart Days (Half) July 20, Bountiful, southdavisraces.com Deseret News Marathon (Full, Half, 10K) July 24, Salt Lake City, deseretnews.com/marathon Steel Days Run (10K) July 20, American Fork, steeldaysrun.com Legacy Midnight Run (Half, 10K) July 26, Farmington, utahmidnightrun.com Timpanogos Half (Half) July 27, American Fork, timphalf.com Wasatch Half (Half, 10K) Aug. 3, Midway, triutah.com Wasatch Wellness Run (10K) Aug. 3, Provo, wasatchwelnessrun.com Park City Trail Series (15K) Aug. 10, Park City, pctrailseries.com Herriman Hold ’em Half (Half) Aug. 17, Herriman, rungr8.com Mid Mountain Marathon (Full) Aug. 17, Park City, mountaintrails.com Run Elevated Half (Half) Aug. 17, Sandy, sandy.utah.gov Porters Half (Half, 10K) Aug. 17, Draper, triutah.com PC2PG (Half, 10K) Aug. 17, Provo, pc2pg.com

32 | MAY 16, 2019

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

Kingscoot

THE BEST—AND WORST—PLACES TO TRY OUT THE REALM’S HOTTEST WAY TO GET AROUND.

By Kelan Lyons

hether you think they’re terrific traveling companions or sidewalk scourges, there’s no denying that electric scooters have changed how to get around Salt Lake City. They may not have the same convenience as commuting via car, but zipping from Point A to Point B on a Bird, Lime or Spin scooter is a cheap, fun way to travel that—just like riding a bike or walking—doesn’t make the Salt Lake Valley’s air quality worse.

But, rider beware: not all roads are created equal. Each brand’s scooter can travel up to about 15 miles per hour, making some streets safer to scoot on than others. Below are some suggestions on the best and worst places in the city to scoot your little heart out. And, for Christ’s sake, wear a helmet regardless of which route you travel.

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Worst

Liberty Park The second-largest park in Salt Lake City (after Sugar House Park), Liberty Park features ample space to scoot along its paved trails while basking in the beautiful mountain views. Kill a lazy Sunday by scooting over and joining its famed drum circle, or if you like plays on words, restore a Bird to its namesake’s habitat by riding to the Tracy Aviary.

300 South The city’s bike map marks the space along 300 South between about 1100 East and 400 West as being mostly “high comfort.” That’s probably because much of that bike lane is protected by a divider that separates it from the rest of traffic. If you want to ride a scooter downtown but you’re afraid of motorists, this street’s for you.

Jordan River Parkway Considering it runs 45 miles, it’s unlikely you’ll be able to ride the entirety of the Jordan River Parkway on a scooter. But don’t let that stop you from soaking up some sun and scooting to famed local hotspots like the International Peace Gardens, Glendale Golf Course and Constitution Park.

1000 West from 800 South to 600 North Much of 1000 West from 800 South to 600 North is listed as “medium comfort” on the city’s bike map. If you want to see the West Side, the Jordan River and the Utah State Fair Park, and don’t mind trekking along a higher volume road, this route is ideal.

1200 West If you start scooting at the northern end of the Utah State Fair Park, you can go even farther north than 1000 West would take you. Throttle that accelerator and head through Rosewood Park and the Rose Park Golf Course. If you’re feeling adventurous, follow the trail west from the links and eventually you’ll connect with the Jordan River Trail.

State Street There’s no better way to risk life and limb than taking a scooter on State Street, a high-volume, no-nonsense road that’s hostile to bikers and scooter riders alike.

Unless you’re looking to break the law and ride on the street’s uneven sidewalks, steer your scooters away from this asphalt asshole.

2100 South The crowded, bus-heavy 2100 South is nobody’s friend, least of all scooter riders who want a fast, low-stress ride. Instead, if you’re riding from Sugar House toward UTA’s Central Pointe Station, steer that scooter a block or two south, along the less-traveled, safer Trax walking platforms that run beside the train tracks.

Temple Square Terrorizing missionaries and the religious faithful is generally frowned upon in polite society, especially in the Utah theocracy’s capital city. Do yourself a favor and keep clear of the LDS church’s hallowed grounds. The Temple Squarebordering 200 West is a great place to wind your scooter through the busy city streets. It’s what Jesus would do.

Redwood Road If you have a death wish, Redwood Road between 2100 South and North Temple is a great place to scoot. Otherwise, avoid it at all costs. Riding down Redwood is a miserable experience that should be reserved only for masochists, people who have good health insurance and those who enjoy waiting for medical care in emergency rooms.

Highland Drive If you’re feeling an inter-city trek between Sugar House and Holladay, don’t bother scooting on Highland Drive. It’s a grueling ride devoid of friendliness toward scooter riders. You’ll get honked at, fear for your life and loath your decision to take such a crowded, unprotected, bus-infested road. Instead, ride on 900 East for a more comfortable, albeit more indirect, route.

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Best

34 | MAY 16, 2019

DEREK CARLISLE

Breaker of Chains

SAY ‘DRACARYS’ TO THAT CORPORATE MEAL AND OPT FOR THESE LOCAL HAUNTS INSTEAD.

By Alex Springer

es, SLC is home to more national food chains than the Night King had zombie minions, but that doesn’t mean that our own scrappy forces of local restaurant heroes can’t take ‘em down. For every debauched menu item that the big boys roll down the track, Utah’s own burger joints, pizza parlors and taco stands are standing by ready to defend us from the onslaught. Lift your hands and rise.

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Westerosi Bacon Cheeseburger Few of the combos on this list have as much bitter history as the Western Bacon Cheeseburger at Carl’s Jr. and the Texas Bacon Cheeseburger at Apollo Burger (multiple locations, apolloburgers.com). There was a time when you could get a Western bacon at both restaurants, but CJ’s took Apollo Burger to court for copyright infringement— they claimed to have invented the term “Western Bacon Cheeseburger.”

Apollo did its best to fight back, but their efforts were in vain and so the Texas Bacon Cheeseburger was born.

When you bite into a tasty Texas Bacon Cheeseburger, pictured, not only

are you getting a superior product for practically the same amount of money, but you’re also sticking it to a soulless chain that, truth be told, goes a little overboard with their barbecue sauce.

Mhysa, Mhysa!

There’s nothing quite as satisfying as floppy, foldable slices of pizza. Pizza Hut, Domino’s and Little Caesar’s do an OK job at mass-producing this kind of magic, but if you happen to find yourself with a hankering for some greasy, slightly trashy (in all the right ways) pizza, then The Pie Hole (344 S. State, 801-359-4653, pieholeutah.com) needs to be in your life. The Pie Hole is open later than the storefronts operated by big pizza (until 2 a.m. SundayThursday and 3 a.m. on Fridays and Saturdays); they offer vegan pizza that doesn’t suck; and after one slice of the Munchy Mango, it makes it obvious they’re the Arbor Gold to the other guys’ swill.

Cersei Gordita Crunch When in the market for tacos in the 800 South and State Street area, you can either go to Taco Time or one of

the several taco carts that now surround the fast food chain’s location. El Paisa is my favorite of the bunch—for a couple bucks, you can get tacos al pastor or carne asada, but they’ll always have my respect for showing me the beauty of well-cooked beef tongue. Songs will be written about El Paisa’s lengua. So, when taco Tuesday rolls around—and your first impulse is to hit up Taco Bell, Del Taco or the ilk—pass on the drive-thru, prop yourself along the sidewalk, frosty bottle of Mexican Coke in hand, and get ready to feast like a king (or queen).

Dothraki Dessert The Cheesecake Factory is perhaps the most dastardly chain of them all.

Thought to be unbreakable, despite the bad casino lighting and tacky menu advertisements, it rises like an impregnable garrison of Glamburgers. Across the Wasatch Front, good people who have simply been lulled into submission by the siren song of a five-page cheesecake menu flock to this unholy place. With a little bit of redirection, however, these folks can be freed. For those of you whose parents

insist on the Cheesecake Factory for special occasions, may I present The Dodo (1355 E. 2100 South, 801-4862473, thedodorestaurant.com) as an alternative. It’s got the same faux-fancy aesthetic; it boasts an equally eclectic menu; and a slice of their mountainous Toll House Pie towers above Frankencheesecake any day of the week.

Wrenching the Wheel If there’s one area of the fast food spectrum in which Utah leans local, it’s ice cream. Sure, Baskin Robbins has its 31 flavors, but visiting Leatherby’s Family Creamery (multiple locations, leatherbys.com) or Monkeywrench (53 E. Gallivan Ave., facebook.com/monkeywrench) on a Friday night shows that the Beehive’s frozen treat connoisseurs prefer their icy thrills homegrown. Both Leatherby’s and Monkeywrench offer gigantic sundaes, overstuffed ice cream cones and plenty of other sweet surprises that have yet to be bested by their national counterparts.

Their addictive menu items’ secret ingredient? Locally unsullied ingredients plus heaps of TLC (and, perhaps, blood magic).

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ENRIQUE LIMÓN

What is Dead May Never Pie FROM HANDHELD TO TRADITIONAL, IS THERE A BETTER FOOD THAN PIE?

By Alex Springer

hether you’re spending your time is avoiding spoilers at the dinner table or warding off your twin’s advances (too far?) there’s no denying pie is the ultimate way of capping off a feast. Regardless if your taste is more Joffrey or Rat Cook, these best pies of Crusteros are sure to do the trick.

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Old-Fashioned Buttermilk Pie ($3.79) The time to get yourself a rich slice of buttermilk pie from Penny Ann’s Café is now. This is a warm hug of wholesome goodness that mixes the best elements of pie with the best elements of sugar cookies. After fighting the Army of the Dead in low lighting, this is the kind of flavor combo that can make your head right again.

Multiple locations, pennyannscafe.com

Cubano Meat Pie ($4.25) Take a trip to Fillings & Emulsions before our eternal winter and munch on this savory hand-held pie. Not only will the flavor explosion of one of the finest sandwiches on the planet make you appreciate the culinary diversity that only immigrants can give us, but, as evidenced by his multicultural staff and stellar Latin American-inspired offerings, Chef Adalberto Díaz, pictured, is a true champion of diversity.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Walder Frey. 1475 S. Main, 385-2294228, fillingsandemulsions.com

MAY 16, 2019 | 37

Toll House Pie ($6.99) Enter The Dodo’s Toll House Pie. It’s a warm, gooey hybrid of chocolate chip cookies and pecan pie, which are two of the most comforting resources that human beings have conceived. Snag one or two slices of this excellent dessert for cases of extreme long night duress.

1355 E. 2100 South, 801-486-2473 thedodorestaurant.com

Snack Crack Pie ($25.00) Want to live like a Lannister? Then treat yourself to a Snack Crack pie from Heber’s June Pie (they’ll sometimes do pop-up shops in Salt Lake City, if the journey is too daunting).

The treat’s crust is made out of a sticky sweet Chex mix, and a combo of creamy fillings seals the deal. Hear your taste buds roar. 133 N. Main, Heber, 435-503-6950, junepie.com

38 | MAY 16, 2019

A Feast for Bros OUTDOOR PATIOS YOU CAN (IRON) BANK ON!

DEREK CARLISLE

By Naomi Clegg

CAMPFIRE LOUNGE Alleged Julien Baker once sang from the rooftop above Alleged’s patio bar before she turned 21, which cements the three-story club— once Ogden’s finest brothel—as both the stuff of legends and an all-around swell place to enjoy an outdoor drink.

201 25th St., Ogden, 801-9900692, alleged25th.com A Bar Named Sue on State A classic dive. Neon lights that spell “cold beer” and “whiskey” light up the outdoor patio, where you can have a smoke after listening to local bands play inside.

8136 S. State, Midvale, 801-5663222, abarnamedsue.net Bar X/Beer Bar Whether you’re in the mood for classic cocktails in a Prohibitionera speakeasy or casual beers and brats, these adjoining bars have it all, plus a buzzy patio.

155 E. & 161 E. 200 South, 385-2590905, beerbarslc.com

Bohemian Brewery Step into olde-worlde central Europe—and then step outside onto the patio to enjoy a traditionally brewed lager with some potato pancakes and Bohemian goulash.

94 Fort Union Blvd., Midvale, 801566-5474, bohemianbrewery.com Campfire Lounge Is there any local establishment for which the patio is more integral than Campfire Lounge? This Sugar House bar takes camping kitsch to the next level—in a good way—with outdoor firepits, wood furnishings and tin foil dinners.

837 E. 2100 South, 801-467-3325, campfirelounge.com Cliff Dining Pub A classy Draper establishment with craft cocktails and a menu that draws on dining traditions from around the world to create new dishes, like sushi nachos, which you can eat while enjoying the expansive views.

12234 Draper Gate Drive, Draper, 801523-2053, cliffdiningpub.com

MAY 16, 2019 | 39

Blue Iguana Tacos, burritos and Iguanaritas on a summer night at Blue Iguana’s

below-ground patio? Sign me up.

165 S. West Temple, 801-533-8900, blueiguanarestaurant.net

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MIKEY SALTAS

Patio Guide

GRACIE’S Dick N’ Dixie’s The small patio that lines the side of this neighborhood bar is the perfect place to do some people watching, catch up on gossip or debate the most recent sports game.

479 E. 300 South, 801-994-6919 The Dodo Get your park views at this classy establishment, right across from Sugar House Park.

Add a slice of rainbow cake or peanut butter pie to sweeten the deal.

1355 E. 2100 South, 801-4862473, thedodorestaurant.com East Liberty Tap House A perfect summer night: A fantastic burger and fries with a glass of cider at ELTH, chased by a late-night showing at the Tower Theatre, right next door.

850 E. 900 South, 801-441-2845, eastlibertytaphouse.com Elixir Lounge This ain’t your average neighborhood beer joint. Enjoy craft cocktails, martinis and an expansive wine list from the cozy, warmly lit outdoor patio.

6405 S. 3000 East, Holladay, 801943-1696, elixirloungeslc.com

Gracie’s Ah, Gracie’s. Catch some live music and drink a local beer on a summer night at this celebrated spot.

326 S. West Temple, 801-819-7565, graciesslc.com Green Pig Pub Whether you’re in the mood for classic burgers or vegan burritos, enjoy the breeze on the awardwinning rooftop patio—voted the best in SLC—of this downtown sports bar.

31 E. 400 South, 801-532-7441, thegreenpigpub.com HandleBar A biker bar—for cyclists. Beer hounds and mustachioed persons also welcome.

751 N. 300 West, 801-953-0588, handlebarslc.com Hog Wallow Pub Live music at a rustic tavern located at the base of Big Cottonwood Canyon.

The perfect post-hike pitstop.

3200 E. Big Cottonwood Canyon Road, 801-733-5567, thehogwallow.com Ice Haüs A wood awning shades patrons at this classic Murray bar. Beer, brats, booze and a breeze? Perfection.

7 E. 4800 South, Murray, 801-266-2127, icehausbar.com

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Feldman’s Deli Sandwiches should be eaten outdoors. That’s especially true if that sandwich is a Reuben from Feldman’s Deli.

2005 E. 2700 South, 801-9060369, feldmansdeli.com

Garage on Beck Enjoy a show from local bands, then step out on the spacious patio for a breath of air, a Corona and a chat around the firepit.

1199 Beck St., 801-521-3904, garageonbeck.com

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PARTY ON THE PATIO!

PIPERD OWN PU B. COM 149 2 S . S TAT E | 801. 4 68. 14 92

751 N. 300 W. | handlebarslc.com

7 EAST 4800 SOUTH • 801-266-2127

OPEN 11AM WEEKDAYS - 10 AM WEEKENDS - ICEHAUSBAR.COM

2 5 5 0 Wa s h i n g t o n B l v d . O g d e n 801.621.3483 | harphound.com

25% off

Patio Guide

DEREK CARLISLE

PIPER DOWN PUB La Caille If what you want is a magical, romantic experience, La Caille is the place to go. Watch peacocks wander the grounds from the lantern-lit eating area while dining on French cooking.

9565 S. Wasatch Blvd., Sandy, 801-942-1751, lacaille.com Level Crossing Brewing Co. This newly opened brewery boasts an outdoor patio complete with picnic tables and cornhole where you can enjoy your fave local brews.

2496 S. West Temple, levelcrossingbrewing.com Log Haven Take a drive up Millcreek Canyon for special occasion fine dining at this atmospheric (think a magical cottage in the woods), Zagat-rated New American restaurant.

6451 Millcreek Canyon Road, 801-272-8255, log-haven.com Lucky 13 Enjoy Utah’s best burgers and a beer on the large, rustic patio that looks out on 1300 South.

135 W. 1300 South, 801-487-4418, lucky13slc.com

Oasis Café A perfect Sunday morning hangout: Browse the selection at adjoining Golden Braid Books while you wait for a table on the flower-filled outdoor patio, then enjoy the best damn potatoes you’ve ever put in your mouth.

151 S. 500 East, 801-322-0404, oasiscafeslc.com Piper Down Pub It’s an Irish pub, but it’s so much more. Head up to the rooftop patio to enjoy Sunday mimosas and endless bloody marys, or down some bangers and mash on Mondays.

1492 S. State, 801-468-1492, piperdownpub.com

• • • • • • • • • •

Luxury Throw-back Unique Standard Wall to Wall Area Rugs Discontinued Minor Blemishes Boat/Auto Binding

HUGE DISCOUNTS

Enormous in-stock selection Carpeting at comfortable prices 3663 Main St, Salt Lake City (801) 266-1788 / carpetbarnutah.com

Poplar Street Pub Sit on the high stools out back at this popular pub and enjoy some garlic fries. Come early if you want a seat—those bar stools are in high demand on warm summer nights.

242 S. 200 West, 801-532-2715, poplarstreetpub.com Porcupine Pub & Grill A family-friendly pub geared toward the outdoorsy, with spacious patios at both their original location at the mouth of Big Cottonwood Canyon and their university location.

258 S. 1300 East, 801-5825555; 3698 Fort Union Blvd., Cottonwood Heights, 801-9425555, porcupinepub.com

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Mazza With locations at 9th & 9th and 15th & 15th, these airy eateries offer modern takes on Middle Eastern classics, with an extensive Lebanese wine list.

912 E. 900 South, 801-521-4572; 1515 S. 1500 East, 801-484-9259, mazzacafe.com

REMNANTS UP TO 22 FEET DURING JULY!

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Welcome to Millcreek’'s Newest

Watering Hole!

Quality Spirits • Excellent food • Live Music

Dog Friendly Patio Coming Soon!

1306 E. Woodland Avenue, Millcreek Wed-Sun 5pm-1am | riverbankbar.com

801-484-1718

JOHN TAYLOR

Patio Guide

RUTH’S DINER Prohibition It’s a speakeasy, all right. There’s a secret password (tell them you’re under the weather), a dapper staff dressed in their 1920s best and burlesque performances on weekends. Bring your cigarette holder and smoking jacket for a trip to the outdoor patio.

151 E. 6100 South, Murray, 801-2814852, prohibitionutah.com Roots Café This is a restaurant worth driving out of your way for. It’s fresh and affordable, the breakfast of your dreams, every time—and the food tastes even better basking in the shade right outside.

3474 S. 2300 East, 801-277-6499, rootscafeslc.com The Royal Salt Lake’s hottest club! Get your dance moves on, then cool off on a tree-shaded patio overlooking a creek.

4760 S. 900 East, 801-590-9940, theroyalslc.com Ruth’s Diner Along with being the state’s second-oldest restaurant, Ruth’s has the distinction of having one of the best patios in all of SLC. 4160 Emigration Canyon Road, 801582-5807, ruthsdiner.com

The Sun Trapp One of Salt Lake’s few true queer bars. Pregame for your next Viva La Diva show at Metro Music Hall, mere feet away, with a beer in a Mason jar on the patio out back.

102 S. 600 West, 385-235-6786, thesuntrapp.com Taco Taco Downtown’s best tacos. Get buzzed with a side of chips at this eatery right across the street from the Main Library.

204 E. 500 South, 801-355-8518, canellas.com The Tap Room It’s been around forever, but still remains a hidden Sugar House gem. Have a whiskey and a latenight chat under the umbrella tables that fill a greenery-filled alley.

2021 S. Windsor Circle, 801-4846692, facebook.com/slctaproom Taquería 27 “Not your average rice-and-beans place,” says chef Todd Gardiner.

Enjoy fresh takes on Latin classics at four different locations in the Salt Lake Valley, plus one in Lehi. All have patios.

Multiple locations, taqueria27.com

MAY 16, 2019 | 47

Shades Brewing Go through the red door on this industrial street and enjoy a locally made brew on the newly refurbished patio. But BYOF (bring your own food). Pets welcome!

154 W. Utopia Ave., 435-200-3009, shadesofpale.com

Stanza Italian Bistro & Wine Bar A contemporary Italian restaurant in an architecturally stunning building that includes—you guessed it!—a lovely, tree-shaded patio. Class up a weekday evening with a glass of wine and some fancy pasta.

454 E. 300 South, 801-746-4441, stanzaslc.com

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Exotic Burgers!

Ostrich Elk Buffalo Wild Boar Venison Wagyu 2106 W. North Temple. Salt Lake City, Utah 801-741-1188

10% off for military, firefighters and law enforcement

Tin Angel This establishment seems made for nostalgic summer nights, with twinkle lights, live music and tasty eats on a secluded patio right next to Pioneer Park.

365 W. 400 South, 801-3284155, thetinangel.com

Taste The Difference Fresh Makes

Patio Guide

Twist Enjoy live music and a drink or two on the patio at this downtown nightclub, once a 19th-century boiler room.

32 Exchange Place, 801-322-3200, twistslc.com

Trio Wood-fired pizza and lobster lasagna, California wine, and a spot on the patio looking out on 900 South. What more could you ask for?

680 S. 900 East, 801-5338746, triodining.com

White Horse This Main Street mainstay opens onto the street on warm summer nights so you can enjoy a craft cocktail and New American dishes au naturel. Wait, not that kind of au naturel.

325 S. Main, 801-363-0137, whitehorseslc.com

TRADITION

JOHN TAYLOR

Tradition Comfort food, mostly Southern style. Chow down on classic dishes such as fried green tomatoes, cornbread, fried chicken and pie right across from Liberty Park.

501 E. 900 South, 385-2027167, traditionslc.com

Speciality pizza & pasta made in house Tues & Wed 11:30am - 9:30pm

Thurs - Sat 11:30am - 10pm

Sunday 4:30pm - 8:30pm

2819 S. 2300 E. SLC www.nuchs-pizzeria-and-restaurant.com

MAY 16, 2019 | 49

50 | MAY 16, 2019

Growing Strong YOUR HANDY SUMMER FARMERS MARKET GUIDE.

DOWNTOWN FARMERS MARKET 9th West Farmers Market This Sunday market takes place at Jordan Park, next to the International Peace Gardens. Buy produce, honey and handiwork, or watch local musicians and entertainers perform. A tokenexchange system allows marketwide debit and EBT payments for produce.

Jordan Park, 1000 S. 900 West, Sundays, June 9-Oct. 13, 10 a.m.2 p.m., 9thwestfarmersmarket.org

Murray Farmers Market A produce-focused market (yes!)

that claims to be Utah’s oldest farmers market, with a great central location in the valley.

Murray Park, 296 E. Murray Park Ave., Fridays & Saturdays, July 27-Oct. 27, 9 a.m.-2 p.m., facebook.com/murrayfarmersmarket

SERVING DINNER & SUNDAY BRUNCH

Park City Farmers Market Drop by Park City’s farmers market on a weekday afternoon. This Wednesday market takes place at the Park City Resort and prioritizes local, organic produce.

Park City Resort, Silver King Lot, 1845 Empire Ave., Park City, Wednesdays, June 12-Oct. 16, noon-5 p.m., parkcityfarmersmarket.com Park Silly Sunday Market For a weekend Park City option, the Silly Sunday Market offers a county fair atmosphere along Park City’s Main Street, with costumed vendors and stilt-walking performers; the market sees an average of 13,000 people every Sunday.

Main Street, Park City, Sundays, June 2-Sept. 22, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., parksillysundaymarket.com (801) 466-9827 | HARBORSLC.COM | 2302 E PARLEY’S WAY SLC, UT

MAY 16, 2019 | 51

Downtown Farmers Market The farmers market of all farmers markets, this Saturday bazaar winds around the entire perimeter of downtown’s Pioneer Park.

Stop and shop with a free bike valet, grab lunch at one of the many food carts and pick up produce and handiwork from local vendors.

Pioneer Park, 350 W. 300 South, Saturdays, June 8-Oct. 19, 8 a.m.2 p.m., slcfarmersmarket.org

COURTESY DOWNTOWN FARMERS MARKET

By Naomi Clegg

52 | MAY 16, 2019

Sugar House Farmers Market This family-friendly neighborhood market focuses on local, artisan prepared foods and crafts.

Fairmont Park, 1049 E. Sugarmont Drive, Wednesdays, July 3-Sept.

25, 5-8 p.m., sugarhousefarmersmarket.org Sunnyvale Farmers Market This farmers market, located in a food desert that houses many refugees and immigrants, partners with New Roots to sell produce grown by refugees at urban community farms. It’s right off the Trax red line and offers a food pantry, resource booths, produce—including many crops from around the world—and a free kids’ lunch and activities.

Sunnyvale Park, 4013 S. 700 West, Saturdays, June 15-Oct. 19, noon2 p.m., sunnyvalefarmersmarket.org Tuesday Farmers Market Satisfy your mid-week vegetable

NIKI CHAN

SUGAR HOUSE FARMERS MARKET

cravings with this Tuesday extension of the Downtown Farmers Market, which starts at 4 p.m. and ends at dusk.

Pioneer Park, 350 W. 300 South, Tuesdays through Sept. 24, 4 p.m.dusk, slcfarmersmarket.org University of Utah Farmers Market This late-season farmers market starts in August, with the arrival of the fall semester—but don’t worry, it’s open to everyone, students and non-students alike.

Tanner Plaza, 201 S. 1460 East, Thursdays, Aug. 22-Oct. 3, 10 a.m.2 p.m., sustainability.utah.edu Wheeler Sunday Market Murray’s Wheeler Historic Farm hosts a Sunday market with produce, canned goods, arts & crafts and food trucks and stands.

Wheeler Farm, 6351 S. 900 East, Murray, Sundays, June 2-Oct. 27, 9 a.m.-2 p.m., slco.org/wheeler-farm

MAY 16, 2019 | 53

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Songs of Ice and Fire TAP YOUR BOOTS AT THESE ED SHEERAN-LESS MUSIC FESTS.

By Erin Moore

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Red Butte Garden Outdoor Concert Series (May 31–Sept. 23) The concert series at Red Butte Gardens offers a great chance to not only get outside to enjoy music and the summer weather, but also to enjoy the beauty of the gardens and the views of the valley from the hillside. The series brings big names across the genre-spectrum to its family-friendly, picnicon-the-grass setting. Some of this year’s 31 shows include Seal, John Prine, Lucinda Williams, the Utah Symphony, Shakey Graves and the B52’s as they make their anniversary tour with Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark. Red Butte Gardens, 300 Wakara Way, $20–$94, redbuttegarden.org/concerts Ogden Twilight (June 6–Sept. 27) Ogden Twilight, located at the Ogden Amphitheater, offers up a chance for Ogdenites to enjoy big acts in their own backyard. The series stretches out to September, with shows roughly every two weeks. Their lineups always include heavy hitters, and this year is no different: headliners include Washed Out with Deerhunter, The Flaming Lips, Phantogram, Iron & Wine, and Rüfüs Du Sol. Ogden Amphitheater, 343 E. 25th Street, Ogden, $10-$20, ogdentwilight.com

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Utah Blues Fest (June 14-15) Put on by the nonprofit Utah Blues Society, the Utah Blues Fest is a fouryears-running festival born from the tossing and turning of different past blues festivals that have come and gone. The festival takes place at the Gallivan Center, and includes not only local and national blues acts, but workshops where festival-goers can learn how to play and make instruments. Ronnie Earl & The Broadcasters, Sue Foley and the UBS Youth Blues Showcase are among the performers. The Gallivan Center, 239 S. Main, $30–$150, utahbluesfest.org Deer Valley Music Festival (June 28-Aug. 10) Akin to Red Butte in some ways, Deer Valley Music Festival is a great escape for those who want to get away from the city for an evening and nestle among the stars and the cradle of Park City’s mountains, with the glow of the sunset and the stage as company. Deer Valley frequently features performances by the Utah Symphony, and this year they’ll perform on separate occasions with trumpeter Chris Botti, Broadway star Kristin Chenoweth and Indigo Girls, among many other performances.

Deer Valley Resort, 2250 Deer Valley Drive South, Park City, $15-$100, deervalleymusicfestival.org

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COURTESY LOVELOUD

Summer Festivals in Lander, WY

LOVELOUD LoveLoud (June 29) Imagine Dragons frontman Dan Reynolds founded LoveLoud three years ago to benefit LGBTQ youth in Utah, a group which is deeply underserved in our state, with its conservative politics and Mormon religion leaving many kids abandoned by their families. The festival includes queer artists such as Kesha, Tegan and Sara, Laura Jane Grace and the Devouring Mothers. Proceeds from ticket sales go to local and national LGBTQ charities. Usana Amphitheater, 4150 Upper Ridge Road, West Valley City, $29.50–$59.50, loveloudfest.com Twilight Concert Series (July 20–Aug. 30) The uniquely affordable summer mainstay that is the Twilight Concert Series returns for another round at the Gallivan Center, after a several years-long stint at Pioneer Park. Although it’s had its ups and downs over the years, the series pushes on, giving people around the valley an affordable, accessible way to spend summer nights downtown. This year is the second year the series finds itself back at the Gallivan Center, and its lineup of headliners includes: Hippie Sabotage, Blind Pilot, Young the Giant, Vince Staples, Leikeli47, Courtney Barnett and Santigold. The Gallivan Center, 239 S. Main, $10 presale, $15 day of show, twilightconcerts.com

More Festivals Around the Kingdom: Blues, Brews, and BBQ Blues festival with expansive lineup.

Snowbasin Resort, 3925 Snowbasin Road, June 9–Sept. 8, snowbasin.com Crucialfest Late summer metal, punk and post-punk festival. Utah State Fairpark, 155 N. 1000 West, dates and lineup TBA, crucialfest.com Das Energi A well-known EDM event in the hot Utah desert. The Great Saltair, 12408 W. Saltair Drive, Magna, Aug. 16–17, dasenergifestival.com Moab Music Festival Classical music sweeps over breathtaking Moab canyons and red rocks. 58 E. 300 South, Moab, Aug. 26–Sept. 12, moabmusicfest.org Ogden Music Festival Americana, bluegrass and rock ’n’ roll camping fest. Fort Buenaventura, 2450 A Ave., Ogden, May 31–June 2, ofoam.org Provo Rooftop Concert Series A locals-focused concert series that

features “battles of the bands” and theme nights. 100 W. Center St., Provo, June 7, July 5, Aug. 2, Sept. 6, lineup TBA, rooftopconcertseries.com

Reggae Rise Up The Utah counterpart to Florida’s own Reggae-only fest of the same name.

River’s Edge Campground, Heber City, Aug. 23–25, reggaeriseuputah.com Rio Grande Concert Series Features one national and one local artist every Thursday in May. The Gateway, through May 30, shopthegateway.com Salt Lake City Jazz Festival Weekend event full of prolific jazz figures in the heart of SLC. Gallivan Center, 239 S. Main, Sept. 5–7, slcjazzfestival.com Women’s Redrock Music Festival Folk and singersongwriter festival on the edge of Capitol Reef National Park. Torrey.

Dates, lineup, location TBA, womensredrockmusicfest.com

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58 | MAY 16, 2019

of

Clinks

SAIL, BIKE OR DRAGON-RIDE TO THESE LOCAL BREWERIES.

By Mike Riedel

t used to be that “Salt Lake City” and “beer” were as rarely uttered in the same sentence as “Sandor Clegane” and “thottie.” Now, our little mountain enclave is finally getting its ale groove, and is in the midst of a craft beer boom.

Need proof? Over the past three years, a baker’s dozen of new breweries have opened across the state, six of those in the central downtown area. Here’s a quick brewery guide to the craft beer spots in the capital city’s inner grid:

I

Toasted Barrel Brewery Billed as Utah’s dedicated sour brewery, Toasted Barrel’s goal is to push the limits of what sour and wild beers can be by producing exotic and standard styles, all with an emphasis on hand craftsmanship. Owners Sage Dawson and Lynn Litchfield came by craft beer through the joy of homebrewing, but found little in the way of regularly-available, local sour beers. Now the city’s northernmost brewery has a regular selection of young and old sours, including beers like their Sour Farmhouse ale and their newest release, Black Currant Sour.

412 W. 600 North, 801-657-6942, toastedbarrelbrewery.com Red Rock Brewing Co. One of Salt Lake’s O.G. breweries, this downtown staple opened its doors in 1994 and has been upping the city’s beer game since, all while nabbing the Great American Beer Festival’s Large Brewpub of the Year award in 2007. No matter if you skew toward ales or lagers, low- or high-point, Red Rock’s consistent portfolio of awardwinning beers keeps the comfy brewpub packed on a nightly basis. Their Elephino Double IPA is the state’s second-most popular local beer, and their Nut Brown Ale has more awards than creepy Craster had kids.

Multiple locations, redrockbrewing.com

Fisher Brewing Co. It’s rare when you can take a brand and successfully reinvent it. That’s what happened in February 2017 when four pals (including a former City Weekly scribe) opened up the second incarnation of the A. Fisher Brewing Co. in Salt Lake’s Granary district. The original brewery shuttered in 1963, and primarily brewed light lagers. This new iteration went in a completely different direction: small and localized. Concentrating on small batches and wide variety, this draft-only brewery has become one of the city’s greatest success stories.

320 W. 800 South, 801-487-2337, fisherbeer.com Templin Family (T.F.) Brewing The newest brewery in central Salt Lake is the brainchild of noted brewer Kevin Templin, who made a name for himself as head brewer for Red Rock Brewing. Looking toward German traditions for his family-style brewery, Templin decided to concentrate on Old World styles with an emphasis on comfort beers. Long festival-style tables with benches that encourage social interactions, mixed with a variety of highand low-point brews have created a cozy atmosphere that’s drawing in beer lovers every hour of the day. 936 S. 300 West, 385-270-5972, tfbrewing.com

Proper Brewing Co. In early 2013, two brothers by the name of Connelly opened a brewpub in the Aves. Their Avenues Proper and Publick House was an instant hit, and the beer gushed out of the small, neighborhood brewery. To keep up with demand, the Connellys created Proper Brewing Co. on Main Street, the heart of downtown. The beer flows much more freely here, with 10 rotating beers on tap and multiple bottled high-point offerings. Proper’s Vienna-style Leisure Brau always puts me in my happy place.

857 S. Main, 801-953-1707, properbrewingco.com Epic Brewing Co. Utah’s largest locally owned brewery has been bucking the system since opening their doors in 2010. When this maverick brewery debuted, they were the first in the state to exclusively offer high-point beers. Eventually, they got into the lucrative draft-beer scene, but the State Street brewery’s bread and butter has always been its cutting-edge big beers. From its Big Bad Baptist Imperial stout to a cornucopia of IPAs, this downtown staple continues to be ... well, epic. Don’t forget to check out their newly expanded taproom.

825 S. State, 801-906-0123, epicbrewing.com Desert Edge Brewery In 1972, a restaurant called The Pub opened in SLC’s Trolley Square. Back then, it was mostly Coors that made its way down wayward travelers’ gullets. In 1995, The Pub expanded into the craft beer business and dropped its generic name in favor of the jazzier Desert Edge. It won Utah’s first gold medal at the Great American Beer Festival for its Happy Valley Hefeweizen the following year. Over its history, brewers have come and gone,

but current head brewer Chad Krussel is making a name for himself at the east side brewpub with his American pale ales. If you haven’t tried Krussell’s Citra Rye Pale Ale yet, get on it.

551 S. 600 East, Trolley Square, 801-5218917, desertedgebrewery.com RoHa Brewing Project Chris Haas, RoHa’s co-owner and head brewer, built a reputation brewing at the aforementioned Desert Edge by concocting classic beer styles with mass appeal. After decades in the biz, Haas and his partners established the RoHa Brewing Project in April of last year. The philosophy remained the same: Create technically proficient beers that are appealing and interesting with the added freedom of no draft restrictions. Right out the castle gate, RoHa’s Thursday India Pale Ale won a bronze medal at the North American Brewers Association competition. If IPAs aren’t your thing, their Kensington Saison is sure to satisfy nicely. As always, valar morghulis!

30 E. Kensington Ave., 385-227-8982, rohabrewing.com A version of this feature appears in our 2019 City Guide. Pick up a copy today to read up on everything that makes SLC the coolest place this side of The Wall.

And now our special issue has ended.

MAY 16, 2019 | 59

Squatters Beers Think of them as local beer’s First Men. Way back in 1989, Peter Cole and Jeff Polychronis took a gamble that their

Kiitos Brewing One of Utah’s newest breweries is all about gratitude. Hell, the word Kiitos means “thank you” in Finnish. Located on the far west side of SLC’s Granary District, Kiitos has rapidly built an excellent reputation. The large, unassuming brewery houses a bar, retail store and a vast selection of pinball machines.

Head Brewer Clay Turnbow committed early on to making full-flavor draft offerings while rolling out the barrels (literally) with a diverse range of barrel-aged beers. Try their Vanilla Stout.

608 W. 700 South, 801-215-9165, kiitosbrewing.com

SQUATTERS

ENRIQUE LIMÓN

A Clash

fellow Utahns would crave homegrown beers in a cozy downtown setting—and they’ve only continued to grow since.

Initially, the brewpub occupied the first floor of its 300 South location; it now takes up all three levels. Building on that legacy, head brewer Jason Stock keeps the beer selection fresh, innovative and traditional all at once and handsomely adorns every bottle of Hop Rising, the realm’s best selling high-point beer.

147 W. 300 South, 801-363-2739; 1900 Park Ave., Park City, 435-649-9868, squatters.com

60 | MAY 16, 2019

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COUORTESY LA CAILLE

This prom season, let us reflect on fine dining through a teenage lens.

T

The Roof

Benihana

| CITY WEEKLY |

MAY 16, 2019 | 61

Sometimes, the pressure of planning a pre-prom destination restaurant that was sure to inspire romance with a capital “R” became too much to bear. That’s when Benihana would always pop up.

Although it’s a bit of a dark horse in Utah’s prom scene, visiting this nationally renowned hibachi restaurant was perfect if you had the right group of people. Revisiting it as an adult just serves to reinforce Benihana’s prom date vibe—it’s nice in an approachable kind of way, and its inner kitsch is obscured by its outward presentation.

The real draw of Benihana is, of course, the tableside spectacle—it’s the only place I can think of where you’re actually stoked to see a shrimp tail end up in your drink. The price point for what you get is totally doable on a parttime budget, and it’s endlessly entertaining to watch a skilled hibachi chef prepare a meal right at the table.

You could actually tell quite a bit about the evening ahead of you based on how your date reacted to the whole operation, which also made it a good litmus test. If you’re eating here with a person who enjoys watching meat and veggies get sliced up mere inches away from their face, there’s a good chance they’ll stick around when they find out what a crappy dancer you are. While you’re there, pour some virgin Benihana Punch in honor of The Five Alls— a pre-prom staple that’s now gone, but not forgotten. CW 165 S. West Temple, 801-322-2421, benihana.com

Hitting up the 10th floor of the Joseph Smith Memorial Building was a homerun for us LDS teens on many different levels.

When you’re growing up Mormon, ideas of romance often blossom into daydreams about getting married, mostly because we’re not really allowed to do romance-y stuff until marriage.

All the same, enjoying a fancy but moderately priced dinner with a stellar view of Temple Square in the background was a mainline of squeaky-clean Mormon romance. It got our heads in the lovey-dovey zone while casually reminding us to keep our loins in check.

There’s also something about the buffet-style service at The Roof that alleviates some of the pressure of fine dining. There’s no anxiety about ordering the wrong thing or spending too much because the whole meal costs around 40 bucks per person and everyone involved can pick and choose whatever they like. While eating at The Roof might not have quite the same impact for non-LDS prom groups, it’s straight up fine-dining catnip for those planning on facing their bishops with a clear conscience the next day.

15 E. South Temple, 10th floor, 801-539-1911, templesquare.com

| MUSIC | CINEMA | DINING | A&E | NEWS |

Anyone in the class of 2001 will tell you that La Caille, pictured, was the pinnacle of prom-centric fine dining.

Its impressive acreage is filled with floral nooks and crannies that make great backdrops for photographs, and the restaurant itself looks like it was

BY ALEX SPRINGER summoned directly from the scenes of comments@cityweekly.net a Disney film. @captainspringer For high school students who have never left the country, the interior also his time of year, it’s not uncommon to see high school does a great job of evoking a distinctly kids dressed in their rented tuxes and charmeuse gowns French pastoral vibe—très romantraipsing around our local fine dining establishments. tique. The true test for any teenager Although it’s now officially been 18 years since I was 18, prom footing the bill during a visit to La season always tends to strike a chord with me. When I was a Caille was always to not let the shock high school teacher, it signified the blessed conclusion of an- of seeing the menu prices become other school year, but when I was a high school student, prom visible to your date. Even when you season was something else altogether. crunch the numbers and realize that a filet mignon costs as much as a brandrituals and 12-hour day dates. new PS4 game, you have to maintain When you grow up Mormon, It was weird. you don’t get a whole lot of enthat poker face. If your eyes bug out One of the most crucial as- for even a second, you’ll make your couragement to be alone with a pects of said day dates was the already slim chances of getting lucky member of the opposite sex. At pre-dance dinner. Places like disintegrate completely. a very early age, I learned that The Olive Garden or even Sizan unsupervised social call Once the food arrives, it doesn’t diszler would do for the Spring appoint. In keeping with the adolescent with a girl was the first step on Formal or the Winter Jubi- propensity to try and gross out everythe path to eternal damnation. lee, but prom was a different one at the table, it’s fun to order a plate So, when all the church leaders beast. That dinner was some- of escargot and dare one another to take and parents suddenly rallied thing that prompted you to the first bite. It’s easy to leave La Caille around the concept of high take out a high-interest loan happy as a teenager. Dropping a few school dances like prom, we from your parents or work ex- hundred bucks on a meal when you’re started treating these events tra shifts at Taco Bell. When earning minimum wage at a mall job like the Super Bowl. All that deciding on the perfect din- pretty much ensures that even if you or pent-up hormonal frustration ner destination, the choice your date didn’t enjoy your meal, you that we knew wasn’t going to inevitably came down to one sure as hell pretended to. be spent having sex somehow of these three promtastic bas- 9565 S. Wasatch Blvd., 801-942-1751, manifested itself through ritions of fine dining. diculously complex invitation lacaille.com

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

Prom Nom-Nom

La Caille

NOW OPEN

BY ALEX SPRINGER @captainspringer

SO GRILL KOREAN BBQ AND SUSHI New vendors at Living Traditions Festival 111 W. 9000 S. Sandy, Ut | 801.566.0721

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

| NEWS | A&E | DINING | CINEMA | MUSIC |

| CITY WEEKLY |

BACK BURNER

Pasta for the People since 1968

The Living Traditions Festival (livingtraditionsfestival.com) kicks off this weekend at Library Square, and it’s added a few new food vendors to keep an eye on. Chef Miatta Stevens-Nahas and her business, African Spice, serve up Ghanaian cuisine that includes jollof rice with veggies, spiced plantain on a stick and banana fritters. From Sudan, Chef Alual Kuol Majok and Am Bor Sudanese Cuisine deliver bowls of hearty chicken sheia and Sudanese kabobs. The Bolivia Utah Association also offers Bolivian fare that includes chicharrón Boliviano, a fried pork and corn dish topped with cool, vinegary salsa criolla. It’s not every day that the cuisines of the world assemble within walking distance of one another, so swing by Library Square from Friday, May 17, to Sunday, May 19, for some cultural appreciation. See p. TK for more details.

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Serving American Comfort Food Since 1930 -CREEKSIDE PATIO-89 YEARS AND GOING STRONG-BREAKFAST SERVED DAILY UNTIL 4PM-DELICIOUS MIMOSAS & BLOODY MARY’S-LIVE MUSIC ON THE PATIO-SCHEDULE AT RUTHSDINER.COM“In a perfect world, every town would have a diner just like Ruth’s” -CityWeekly

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Karaoke is widely accepted as awesome, but performing in front of the large crowds that converge in some venues might not be for everyone. If you’re the kind of person who doesn’t mind butchering the falsetto in “Night Fever” as long as it’s with a group of people you trust, then Heart & Seoul Karaoke (67 W. 100 South, 385325-1672, saltlakekaraoke.com) might be the place for you. It’s an operation that started in Provo and has expanded its private room approach to downtown Salt Lake. In addition to furnishing groups both large and small with their own room complete with LCD screens, light shows and a huge catalog of songs, Heart & Seoul has a drink and sushi menu to keep things rolling.

25

year

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Pasha Middle Eastern opens

A family-owned Middle Eastern restaurant that dips into the sultry realm of Moroccan tajine has recently opened its doors downtown. Pasha (60 E. 800 South, 801-355-1515, pashaslc.com) offers traditional dishes like shakshuka and lamb with eggplant alongside a fully stocked wine and beer menu. Pasha shares a neighborhood with Sapa and the up-and-coming Food Alley that recently broke ground across State Street, which is shaping this area up to be one of downtown’s go-to spots for international cuisine. Pasha’s quiet opening has started to generate more traffic, but now’s a good time to check out this new restaurant while the crowds are still manageable.

Quote of the Week: “Food is our common ground.”

—James Beard

4160 EMIGRATION CANYON ROAD | 801 582-5807 | WWW.RUTHSDINER.COM

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62 | MAY 16, 2019

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Summer Brewin’

Two beers designed to make you have a blast.

BY MIKE RIEDEL comments@cityweekly.net @utahbeer

I

’ve been having a lot of fun over the last few months assaulting my palate with a kaleidoscope of local flavors. To be honest, when I first took this gig, I imagined there would be times when the beer scene would become repetitive or slide into territory that seemed too familiar. That has definitely not been the case. This week, I have more proof of our local beer culture’s expanding diversity.

Hopkins Brewing Co. Guava Goddess: This fruited IPA has a cloudy straw color, with a large sudsy head that breaks apart and falls relatively fast. The aroma is guava with some hop spiciness; I also smell some bread, possibly due to the yeast—it’s pleasant, but not overwhelmingly strong. As you can imagine, the guava hits first, along with

citrus and lychee. From there, I’m met with a balance of malt and bread that seems to be driven by the yeast. Most of the hoppy flavors reside in the aftertaste, which is accompanied by floral and grapefruit peel notes. The bitterness is not too overpowering, and similar to the perceived bitterness of most Northeast-style pale ales.

Overall: The best part about this 4.0% beer is its drinkability—probably because it’s an IPA variety most people can get into. The guava comes on even stronger as it warms and jams its fruity boots on the throat of anything else that might surface in the beer. It’s really juicy, and what it lacks in overall roundness on the palate, it makes up in drinkability.

Bohemian Brewery Lagerpalooza Baltic Porter: Every spring, Bohemian Brewery teams up with Midvale’s Salt City Brew Supply to put on the state’s only homebrew lager competition. Lagerpalooza’s best-in-show winner gets to take his or her recipe and brew it with Bohemian’s team of brewers, then release it to the world. Last year’s winner was Curt McCuistion, and his winning beer was a Balticstyle porter. This style of lager hails from the Baltic states of Latvia, Estonia, Lithuania and Poland. It’s akin to a Russian imperial stout in flavor but is cold fermented (lagered) for longer periods.

This iteration is basically black in color, with a copper-colored head that falls rather

MIKE RIEDEL

BEER NERD

quickly to a froth. The head could have stuck around a little longer, but besides that, it’s a really good-looking porter. This beer begins with a big noseful of freshly-brewed black coffee; it’s the most pronounced coffee scent I’ve come across in a Baltic porter.

Dark chocolate plays a big part in the aroma as well. The malts offer up notes of dark doughy bread, but the implied coffee notes dominate. The big dose of coffee up front fades slightly and combines with the dark chocolate to create a great flavor combination. The doughy malts join the coffee and chocolate mid-palate, and while all these flavors work through this phase, dark fruits

like fig and dates make an appearance. The 7.3% alcohol will add a little color to your cheeks.

Overall: This beer is a sipper for sure, and they obviously won’t let you drink too many, but I’d drink these until I couldn’t.

As per McCuistion’s request, and in an evolution of Lagerpalooza’s mission, Bohemian is donating a portion of the proceeds from the sale of this Baltic Porter to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI). As for Guava Goddess, you will only be able to find it at Hopkins Brewing Co. on draft until it’s gone. Hint: Don’t wait too long. As always, cheers! CW

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Post Office Place has gone all out with its creative nods to Peruvian and Japanese cuisine, and it all starts with ceviche.

The hamachi ceviche ($10, pictured) arrived with a pop of vibrant orange, as roasted sweet potatoes sat alongside uniform cubes of yellowtail tuna and thinly sliced habanero peppers. From there, the menu deviates into quite a few deep cuts that gleefully exemplify the dark side of Central American food. The anticucho de corazón ($10) consists of expertly grilled beef heart, and the lengua carpaccio ($12)—the star of the evening—is a carousel of grilled, thinly sliced beef tongue topped with an herbaceous chimichurri sauce. Having found myself on a bit of an offal kick, I ordered a plate of crispy pig ears ($7).

Flavor-wise, they land fairly close to pork rinds, but the sprinkles of cotija cheese, cooked jalapeños and a fresh slice of lime add some subtlety to the plate. A bounty of happy hour offerings is available every day before 6 p.m. and after 9 p.m. For best results, enjoy Post Office Place for what it is—a fresh-faced and hip nightspot designed to be the evening’s launchpad, its unexpected nightcap or both. Reviewed April 4. 16 W. Market St., facebook.com/postbarslc

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Longing for Summer

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wandering to Pie Hole for a deliciously greasy late-night slice of pizza. My friends and I will also enjoy not having to worry about storing our coats or layering up for the frigid walk from bar to bar.

(Kara Rhodes, writer) Comebacks Galore. This summer marks the long-awaited return of Bastille, some of the best live performers I’ve ever seen (thrice!). Their new album (Doom Days, June 14) focuses on the current state of the world and is sure to be full of thoughtful lyrics and the layered sound aesthetic Bastille is known for. Also, there’s a reunion we didn’t even dare to hope for: Jonas Brothers are back with not only a handle on how to style their curly locks but new wives and a new lease on their creative lives. Lead single “Sucker” and its subsequent album Happiness Begins—which celebrates love, madness, joy and color—is a great indicator of what’s to come. I, for one, cannot wait to hear more. (Amanda Taylor, writer) Time Flies When it Comes to Shows. Oh man. The thing about me is that I don’t really plan ahead. Present me simply can’t comprehend the future me I’ll be a month from now. This means I’ve already missed out on tickets to Lord Huron at the Red Butte concert series in August. (Three months away! It might as well be a decade.) Luckily, there are still plenty of options on the table for summer shows. Ogden Twilight has a killer lineup: Deerhunter! The Flaming Lips! Matt and Kim! Phantogram! Iron & Wine! Looking a little closer, I cannot wait to see Tacocat in June at Kilby Court. And I’m looking forward to exploring more great local music with a lil’ help from Parker Mortensen, who runs SLUG Magazine’s Soundwaves podcast. (Naomi Clegg, copy editor) CW

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LUKAS HENKEL VIA WIKIMEDIA COMMONS

$

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ith summer ready to turn the chartreuse of spring into the darker green of heat-laden leaves and lawns, our writers and editors in the music section here at City Weekly are just as ready to consider what music and events will soundtrack our journeys into summer.

Warm Desert Nights in this Little City: Maybe it’s because I was born in Reno, Nev., the “Biggest Little City in the World,” but I think I have a thing for small cities. After spending a year cooped up in a Minneapolis apartment with the huge city bustling around me, a record-breakingly cold Polar Vortex swirling above me, and no means of finding shows I actually liked that didn’t require an expensive Uber or a sober night of driving to get to, each day back in SLC has felt beyond relief. My new downtown apartment will allow me to enjoy the evening air and walk to shows, such as those at my favorite place, Diabolical Records. There, I’m excited to catch an underground favorite of mine, NYC’s Haybaby, later this summer. (Erin Moore, music editor) Sonic Summer Sets. Getting some vitamin D via the sun after a winter of layers, boots and slipping on ice is always something to look forward to. When the weather breaks, people you haven’t seen in months suddenly pop up out of hibernation—you see them at Salt Lake City events like Living Traditions, Bike Prom and the Twilight Concert Series. Twilight has always been one of the highlights of my summer schedule. I’ve seen The Roots, Nas, Lauryn Hill, Anderson .Paak, Wu-Tang Clan, De La Soul … the list goes on. This year, the act I’m most looking forward to is Vince Staples.

Catch me on the “Norf” side of the plaza having “FUN!” on Aug. 8.

(Keith L. McDonald, writer) Another Year, Another Flaming Lips Extravaganza. I’m really excited to see The Flaming Lips at the Ogden Amphitheater as part of the Ogden Twilight Series for the second time this July.

I first saw them last summer, and they entirely lived up to their hype as one of the best live acts currently going. Giant inflatable robots, animatronic unicorns and frontman Wayne Coyne’s iconic human-sized hamster ball made the night one of the most engaging and spectacular concert experiences of my life so far.

This year’s show is looking to be an even bigger spectacle, taking place the night before the worldwide release of their 15th studio album King’s Mouth. I’m looking forward to hopefully seeing some of the new material performed live, as well as Lips classics like “Race for the Prize” and “Fight Test.” (Nic Renshaw, writer) Hugh Jackman: The Man, The Music, The Show. While the youngsters are getting ready for whatever the crazy youngsters are into these days, I’m hoping to get my slightly-more-old-fashioned groove on. Hugh Jackman might still be best-known as the X-Men’s ferocious Wolverine, but the actor is also doing his single-handed best to bring showtunes back into the pop mainstream. His solo performance tour (July 11-12 at Vivint Smart Home Arena) finds him sharing some of his Broadway favorites—including his Tony Award-winning role in The Boy from Oz—and Great American Songbook standards, as well as songs from his own Oscar-winning hit The Greatest Showman. That’s my idea of the greatest show.

(Scott Renshaw, editor) A College Grad’s First Summer of Freedom. Summer 2019: a post-grad summer for this new journalist. This summer will be busy spent at a recurring event that is a Salt Lake City favorite: the Twilight Concert Series. The concert series includes a solid headliner for those who were in high school around 2010 in the duo Hippy Sabotage. My nights will be filled with numerous outdoor concerts followed by bar hopping and going to see some rad local bands and DJs, plus dancing to charged EDM at Sky before

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THURSDAY 5/16

Immortal Technique, Emrsn, Cig Burna

Deep, meaningful raps will always be important to underground hip-hop, and rightfully so. Third-eye-blinding truth is what most hip-hop purists expect, but it’s not the only thing that drives the genre. Storytelling, synthesis and satire make for lasting lyrical content. Immortal Technique—born Felipe Andres Coronel—is one of underground hiphop’s most respected emcees, best-known for his magnum opus, “Dance with the Devil.” The hip-hop community needs party cuts and deep, intricate lyricism like those of Immortal Technique. Even though dance songs and tunes with a preachy tone seem to have a short shelf life, some are known to make artists a mint in the long run, eventually becoming a permanent part of the culture. Artists like Immortal Technique can still land interviews and book shows—and that’s encouraging for old heads. His style is heavier than Slick Rick’s jewelry box, which means he won’t cater to every fan and every situation, but if you like aggressive New York raps about politics and struggle, Technique is right up your alley. (Keith L. McDonald) Soundwell, 149 W. 200 South, 8 p.m., $25 presale; $30 day of show, 21+, soundwellslc.com

SATURDAY, 5/18 The Samples

It’s hard to put an easy label on The Samples’ sound. However, that’s all the more cause for ongoing admiration from their fans. The Colorado-based band has nurtured a singular identity for more than 30 years, winning a reputation as populist purveyors whose jam-band sensibilities find equal footing with their more melodic attributes. Propeled by reggae rhythms

Sean Kelly

and tightly-knit instrumental arrangements, they’ve been described as part Police with more than a hint of the Grateful Dead. Indeed, over the course of approximately 25 studio albums, live offerings and assorted compilations, The Samples have attracted a steadfast following even though they remain outside the musical mainstream. We can credit founder and mainstay Sean Kelly for maintaining their mission.

At this point in the band’s trajectory, he’s the sole remaining founding member, having kept The Samples’ signature sound flourishing both as a band and on his own despite an everchanging lineup that’s seen some two dozen musicians rotate in and out of the group’s ranks. As for their name, it could easily imply the band’s fluent mix of musical ingredients, but in fact it derives from the fact that early on, the musicians depended on free samples at a local grocery store to provide their daily meals. Fortunately, that’s no longer the case, and with a new album—their first in five years— due soon, we can only hope that Kelly and company no longer have to find such creative ways of subsisting. (Lee Zimmerman) O.P. Rockwell, 268 Main, Park City, 8 p.m., $45, 21+, oprockwell.com

Immortal Technique date and arguably her most successful; it already reigns at the top of the charts. But in the beginning, Lewis was forced to face her fears. “It is scary and a lot of responsibility,” she once told Miami New Times. “I’m the only one that can sabotage my own career.

I have a pretty strong artistic vision. … It’s kind of great to be able to express that.” It’s all the more remarkable considering the fact that she’s signed to Warner Bros. Records yet is still given free rein to pursue her artistic inclinations without the constraints major labels often impose. If the album’s title reflects a certain sense of responsibility, Lewis is leveraging it well. The show is sold out at press time, but fans can still see her on July 11 at the Deer Valley Concert Series.

(LZ) The Commonwealth Room, 195 W. 2100 South, 8 p.m., sold out at press time, 21+, thestateroompresents.com

Jenny Lewis

Jenny Lewis, Karl Blau

DAVID HILL

70 | MAY 16, 2019

JEFF BENGELS

Ostrich Elk Buffalo Wild Boar Venison Wagyu

BY KEITH L. McDONALD, NIC RENSHAW & LEE ZIMMERMAN

Jenny Lewis felt the lure of show business early on. Born into a family of entertainers, she següed into a stage career practically from birth, initially as a child actress and then as a singer who established her indie cred as a member of widely hailed alt-rock outfit Rilo Kiley. Giving way to restlessness, she was drawn to a solo career even as she continued to contribute to the band. By the time Rilo Kiley broke up in 2011, Lewis alone already had two albums under her belt, along with the kind of kudos that assured solo success. Lewis recently celebrated the arrival of a new album, On the Line, her fourth to

AUTUMN DE WILDE

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LIVE TUESDAY 5/21

Xiu Xiu, Durian Durian, Muzzle Tung

SPIRITS . FOOD . LOCAL BEER 5.15 JOHN DAVIS

5.16 MYTHIC VALLEY

5.17 MEANDER CAT ALBUM RELEASE PARTY

5.18 SCOUNDRELS

5.20 OPEN BLUES & MORE JAM

Of all the acts to rise to prominence in the 21st century from the post-punk diaspora, Xiu Xiu is perhaps the strangest. Spearheaded by singer, multi-instrumentalist and provocateur Jamie Stewart, Xiu Xiu’s body of work ranges all over the map stylistically, from caustic industrial howls and delicate acoustic balladry to deranged spoken-word pieces, haphazardly tied together by Stewart’s warped, idiosyncratic musings on nihilism, societal decay and queer sexuality. Stewart often seems determined to alienate as many people as possible, whether it’s through shocking, vulgar lyricism, abrasive instrumentation and vocals or songs that eschew conventional structure.

Nonetheless, Xiu Xiu has amassed a sizeable following since the release of their 2002 debut Knife Play, and their influence can be heard in scores of experimental artists tackling LGBTQ themes today. The past few years have seen the group catch something of an artistic second wind—their 2016 covers album Plays the Music of Twin Peaks became their most acclaimed and popular release in more than a decade, and recent albums like Forget and this year’s Girl With Basket of Fruit have enjoyed similarly warm receptions. Xiu Xiu are known for bringing all the intensity and inventiveness of their recorded work to their live sets, and we here in SLC will be able to experience this first-hand when the band takes the stage at The Urban Lounge. Local post-punkers Muzzle Tung and drone-dance act Durian Durian open.

(Nic Renshaw) The Urban Lounge, 241 S. 500 East, 8 p.m., $14 presale; $16 day of show, 21+, theurbanloungeslc.com

Xiu Xiu

Cult Leader, Baby Gurl, Call of the Void

Cult Leader is quite possibly the biggest Utah metal band ever. Rising in 2013 from the ashes of the mighty Gaza (themselves leading lights in the world of extreme metal throughout the 2000s), Cult Leader further honed their previous band’s potent mix of crust punk, sludge metal and grindcore into a dense and chaotic sound that impressed Converge’s Jacob Bannon enough to sign the young group to his own Deathwish, Inc. label. In 2015, they marked the release of their debut full-length Lightless Walk, which dished out plenty of the same punishing riffage that Gaza built their name upon. However, Lightless Walk also found Cult Leader venturing forth into brooding, atmospheric gothic rock in several places, calling to mind acts like Nick Cave and Swans on songs “How Deep it Runs” and “A Good Life,” as well as the apocalyptic title track. The album was a hit with critics and garnered the band a following beyond the borders of the Beehive State. Cult Leader finally unleashed their sophomore album, A Patient Man, in November of last year, again balancing sonic wrecking balls like lead single “I Am Healed” with dark slow-burners like “To: Achlys.” Fresh off a run of tour dates in Oceania and East Asia, Cult Leader is kicking off a North American tour at The Beehive.

Joining them are local noise-rock duo Baby Gurl and Denver-based grindcore act Call of the Void. (NR) Beehive Collective, 666 S. State, 7 p.m., $10 presale; $12 day of show, beehivecollectiveslc.com

Cult Leader

5.24 THE WHISKEY REBELLION

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74 | MAY 16, 2019

THURSDAY 5/16

CONCERTS & CLUBS

CINDY FUNK VIA WIKIMEDIA COMMONS

Herman’s Hermits feat. Peter Noone

THURSDAY 5/16 LIVE MUSIC

Cumbia Night + Street Jesus (Garage on Beck) Herman’s Hermits feat. Peter Noone (Egyptian Theatre) see above Immortal Technique (Soundwell) see p. 70 Mars Highway (Rye) Matt Calder (Lake Effect) Mythic Valley (Hog Wallow Pub) No Robot (Velour) Reggae at the Royal feat. Indubious + Reggaemoons + Tribe of I + Funk & Gonzo (The Royal) Slaughter to Prevail + Alumni + The Conscience + Amorous (Kilby Court) SLUG Localized feat. Martian Cult + Umbels + Coolaid (Urban Lounge) The Violet Temper + Precariat (Metro Music Hall)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE

DJ Chaseone2 (Lake Effect) Dueling Pianos: Drew & JD (Tavernacle) Dueling Pianos (The Spur) Dusty Grooves All Vinyl DJ (Twist)

Hot Noise + Guest DJ (The Red Door) Jazz Jam Session (Sugar House Coffee) Jazz Joint Thursday (Garage on Beck) Synthpop + Darkwave + Industrial + Goth w/ DJ Camille (Area 51) Therapy Thursdays feat. Nova Lotus Takeover (Sky) Tropicana Thursdays feat. Rumba Libre (Liquid Joe’s)

KARAOKE

Areaoke w/ DJ Kevin (Area 51) Cowboy Karaoke (The Cabin) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Karaoke Night (Tinwell) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke That Doesn’t Suck w/ Mikey Danger (Chakra Lounge) Live Band Karaoke (Club 90)

FRIDAY 5/17 LIVE MUSIC

Austin Weyand (Brigham Fine Arts Center) Brother Chunky (HandleBar) Elle King + Barns Courtney (The Depot) Flaural + Tenkaras + RCS (Kilby Court) Grant Sabin & The Juke Joint Highball

Back in the mid-1960s, at the height of the so-called British Invasion, the Beatles weren’t the only band from England that took the states by storm. There were plenty of other contenders as well—The Dave Clark 5, Manfred Mann, The Animals, The Rolling Stones and the most innocent appearing outfit of them all, Herman’s Hermits. Today, most are little more than footnotes in rock’s ongoing trajectory, but two still remain active and engaged: The Rolling Stones, and … Herman’s Hermits. Granted, the original Hermits disbanded in 1971, but its erstwhile namesake, whose given name is Peter Noone (pictured), continues to carry on the legacy established by such giddy, happy-go-lucky hits as “Mrs. Brown, You’ve Got a Lovely Daughter,” “There’s a Kind of Hush,” “I’m Into Something Good” and “I’m Henry the Eighth, I Am.” Noone was only 15 when the band was formed, but he managed to turn his role as Herman into a lifelong profession. His solo cover of David Bowie’s “Oh You Pretty Things” became a top 15 U.K. hit, and he went new wave at the helm of a band called The Tremblers, scored successes on TV, radio and the stage, and currently maintains his upbeat and effusive attitude fronting a new Hermits incarnation. Amazingly cute, cuddly and youthful looking even at age 71, Noone is, as that aforementioned hit claimed, still into something good. (Lee Zimmerman) Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main, Park City, May 16-18, 8 p.m.; May 19, 6 p.m., $43-$75, egyptiantheatrecompany.org

+ The Dirt Nappers (Ice Haüs) (Hed) P.E. (Liquid Joes) Herman’s Hermits feat. Peter Noone (Egyptian Theatre) see above Kevin Morby + Sam Cohen (State Room) Leopard Skin Zebras (Brewskis) Live Local Music (A Bar Named Sue) Mark Owens (The Westerner) Matthew Bashaw (Lake Effect) Meander Cat (Hog Wallow Pub) Michelle Moonshine (The Yes Hell) Microwave Mountain + Payout Beast + Static Replica (Urban Lounge) Mimi Knowles + Garrett Garfield + Talon Cardon (Velour) Natural Causes (Club 90) Shuffle (The Spur) Slim Chance (State Road Tavern) Spot & Waldo (Outlaw Saloon) Tav Falco + Panther Burns (Garage on Beck) The Reverend and the Revelry (Harp and Hound) The Wild Reeds + Jenny O (Metro)

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All-Request Gothic + Industrial + EBM + and Dark Wave w/ DJ Vision (Area 51)

Dance Music (Chakra Lounge) DJ Brisk (Bourbon House) DJ Chaseone2 + Lounge 40 (Lake Effect) DJ Dizz (Downstairs) DJ Sneeky Long (Twist) Dueling Pianos (Tavernacle) Frankie J + Mi Cielo (Sky) Funkin’ Friday w/ DJ Rude Boy & Bad Boy Brian (Johnny’s on Second) Funky Friday w/ DJ Godina (Gracie’s) Hot Noise (The Red Door) New Wave ’80s w/ DJ Courtney (Area 51) Top 40 All-Request w/ DJ Wees (Area 51)

KARAOKE

Areaoke w/ DJ Kevin (Area 51) Karaoke (Cheers to You SLC) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge)

SATURDAY 5/18 LIVE MUSIC

Allman Brown + Aisha Badru + Branson Anderson (Kilby Court) Annika Chambers (Gracie’s) Bill ’n’ Diane (Harp and Hound) George Nelson & Friends (Johnny’s on Second)

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76 | MAY 16, 2019

DICK N’ DIXIE’S

NAOMI CLEGG

BAR FLY

Half Halloween Party feat. DJ Matty Mo + Flash & Flare + Bo York (Urban Lounge) Herman’s Hermits feat. Peter Noone (Egyptian Theatre) see p. 74 Insane Clown Posse + Rittz + Mushroomhead + DJ Paul + Ouija Macc + Kissing Candice (The Complex) Jenny Lewis + Karl Blau (Commonwealth Room) see p. 70 Kenz & the Golden Age (HandleBar) Live Local Music (A Bar Named Sue) Live Trio (The Red Door) Mark Owens (The Westerner) Marmalade Chill (Lake Effect) Microwave Mountain + Queenadilla + Kasadoom (Velour) Natural Causes (Club 90) Psychology (Ice Haüs) Royal Bliss: The Royal’s 6th Anniversary Party (The Royal) Scoundrels (Hog Wallow Pub) Spazmatics (Liquid Joe’s) Spot & Waldo (Outlaw Saloon) Sylar + Cane Hill + Varials + Bloodline (The Complex) Talia Keys (Garage on Beck) The Samples (O.P. Rockwell) see p. 70 Triggers & Slips + Alice in Chains (State Room) Zion Riot (Brewskis)

Sky Saturdays w/ DJ Karma (Sky) Top 40 + EDM + Alternative w/ DJ Twitch (Area 51) Victor Menegaux (Downstairs)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE

Karaoke (Tavernacle) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue)

Dance Music (Chakra Lounge) DJ Handsome Hands (Ruin) DJ Juggy (Bourbon House) DJ Latu (The Green Pig) DJ Mr. Ramirez (Lake Effect) DJ Soul Pause (Twist) Gothic + Industrial + Dark ’80s w/ DJ Courtney (Area 51) Dueling Pianos (Tavernacle) Scandalous Saturdays w/ DJ Logik (Lumpy’s Highland)

KARAOKE

Areaoke DJ Kevin (Area 51) Karaoke (Willie’s Lounge) Karaoke w/ B-Rad (Club 90)

SUNDAY 5/19 LIVE MUSIC

Bob Bland (Garage on Beck) Castle + Dude Cougar + Heretic Temple + Hyde Park (Urban Lounge) Herman’s Hermits feat. Peter Noone (Egyptian Theatre) see p. 74 Michelle Moonshine (Gracie’s) Omni + Rebel Rebel + Odd Equals (Kilby Court) Patrick Ryan (The Spur)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE DJ Handsome Hands (Ruin) Dueling Pianos (The Spur) Live Bluegrass (Club 90) Open Blues Jam (The Green Pig) Sunday Night Bluegrass Jam w/ Nick Greco & Blues on First (Gracie’s)

KARAOKE

MONDAY 5/20 LIVE MUSIC

Amanda Johnson (The Spur) Catbamboo + Mannequin Mishap + Arrows Inward (Kilby Court) Dawnlit + Bath + Gastonmustdie (Urban Lounge)

Since it’s only a few blocks from our apartment, my partner and I took a jaunt to Dick N’ Dixie’s on a recent spring evening, watching the sunset and pointing out the abundant, multicolored blossoms and newly unfurled leaves along the way. Inside, we were greeted by a friendly bouncer, who pointed out the camera around my neck—“Take any good pictures?” he asked. It would have been hard not to take any good pictures, considering how beautiful it was outside. I told him I estimated that they were, at least, OK. Inside, the bar was small but clean and full of shining wood, with unobtrusive TVs and a pool table toward the back. We visited post-dinner, but patrons can request a steaming bowl of ramen through a window in the back of the bar that connects to Yoko Ramen, and I am highly considering going back for some charshu. A tumbler of High West Double Rye in hand, we made our way to the outdoor patio, where we watched the light fade and talked up our summer plans. “We could stop here after shows at Urban Lounge,” my partner posited, and I imagined a long summer of good music chased by drinks and existential conversations on the patio at Dick N’ Dixie’s. What better way to spend an evening, after all, than drinking a drink and talking a talk and watching passersby make their way along the summer streets? Content and slightly buzzed, we made our way back home, stopping to stare up at the stars that had begun to dot the sky. (Naomi Clegg) 479 E. 300 South, 801-994-6919

Deicide + Origin + Jungle Rot + The Absence + Swine of Dissent (Metro Music Hall)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Industry Night Mondays w/ DJ Juggy (Trails) Monday Night Blues & More Jam hosted by Robby’s Blues Explosion (Hog Wallow Pub) Monday Night Open Jazz Session w/ David Halliday & The JVQ (Gracie’s) Open Blues Jam w/ West Temple Taildraggers (The Green Pig) Open Mic (The Cabin)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Poplar Street Pub) Karaoke Bingo (Tavernacle) Karaoke w/ DJ Benji (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke (Cheers To You)

TUESDAY 5/21 LIVE MUSIC

Big Band Tuesday (Gallivan Center) Cult Leader + Baby Gurl + Call of the Void (Beehive Collective) see p. 72 Daniel Torriente (The Spur) Foxing + Now, Now + Daddy Issues (The Complex) Luke Redfield (Kilby Court) The Faint + Choir Boy + Closeness (Metro Music Hall) Xiu Xiu + Durian Durian + Muzzle Tung (Urban Lounge) see p. 72

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE DJ Bryson (Brewskis) Groove Tuesdays (Johnny’s on Second) Locals Lounge (The Cabin) Open Jazz Jam (Bourbon House) Open Mic (The Wall at BYU)

Open Mic Night (The Royal) Tuesday Night Bluegrass Jam w/ Pixie & The Partygrass Boys (Gracie’s) Tuesday Night Jazz (Alibi)

KARAOKE

Karaoke (Liquid Joe’s) Karaoke (Tavernacle) Karaoke w/ DJ Thom (A Bar Named Sue) Karaoke That Doesn’t Suck (Twist) Karaoke w/ Zim Zam Ent. (Club 90)

WEDNESDAY 5/22 LIVE MUSIC

Dylan Roe (Hog Wallow Pub) Needtobreath + Trent Dabbs (Eccles Theater) Sego + Uncle Reno + Super Young Adult (Kilby Court) Shannon Runyon (The Spur) The Twilight Sad + Kathryn Joseph (Urban Lounge) Utah Opera (Gallivan Center)

DJ, OPEN MIC, SESSION, PIANO LOUNGE Dark NRG w/ DJ Nyx (Area 51) Dueling Pianos (Tavernacle) Energi Wednesdays feat. Buku (Sky) Live Jazz (Club 90) Open Mic (Velour) Roaring Wednesdays: Swing Dance Lessons (Prohibition) Top 40 All-Request w/ DJ Wees (Area 51) The Freakout w/ DJ Nix Beat (Twist)

KARAOKE

Areaoke w/ DJ Casper (Area 51) Karaoke w/ B-Rad (Club 90) Karaoke (The Wall at BYU) Karaoke w/ Spotlight Entertainment (Johnny’s on Second)

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): I think it’s time for a sacred celebration: a blow-out extravaganza filled with reverence and revelry, singing and dancing, sensual delights and spiritual blessings. What is the occasion?

After all these eons, your lost love has finally returned. And who exactly is your lost love? You! You are your own lost love!

Having weaved and wobbled through countless adventures full of rich lessons, the missing part of you has finally wandered back. So give yourself a flurry of hugs and kisses. Start planning the jubilant hoopla. And exchange ardent vows, swearing that you’ll never be parted again.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The Louvre in Paris is the world’s biggest art museum. Over 35,000 works are on display, packed into 15 acres. If you wanted to see every piece, devoting just a minute to each, you would have to spend eight hours a day there for many weeks. I bring this to your attention, Gemini, because I suspect that now would be a good time for you to treat yourself to a marathon gaze-fest of art in the Louvre—or any other museum. For that matter, it’s a favorable phase to gorge yourself on any beauty anywhere that will make your soul freer and smarter and happier. You will thrive to the degree that you absorb a profusion of grace, elegance and loveliness.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In my astrological opinion, you now have a mandate to exercise your rights to free speech with acute vigor. It’s time to articulate all the important insights you’ve been waiting for the right moment to call to everyone’s attention. It’s time to unearth the buried truths and veiled agendas and ripening mysteries. It’s time to be the catalyst that helps your allies to realize what’s real and important, what’s fake and irrelevant. I’m not saying you should be rude, but I do encourage you to be as candid as is necessary to nudge people in the direction of authenticity.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): London’s British Museum holds a compendium of artifacts from the civilizations of many different eras and locations. Author Jonathan Stroud writes that it’s “home to a million antiquities, several dozen of which were legitimately come by.” Why does he say that? Because so many of the museum’s antiquities were pilfered from other cultures. In accordance with current astrological omens, I invite you to fantasize about a scenario in which the British Museum’s administrators return these treasures to their original owners. When you’re done with that imaginative exercise, move on to the next one, which is to envision scenarios in which you recover the personal treasures and goodies and powers that you have been separated from over the years.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “I hate it when people tell me that I should ‘get out of my comfort zone,’” writes Piscean blogger Rosespell. “I don’t even have a comfort zone. My discomfort zone is pretty much everywhere.” I have good news for Rosespell and all of you Pisceans who might be inclined to utter similar testimony. The coming weeks will feature conditions that make it far more likely than usual that you will locate or create a real comfort zone you can rely on. For best results, cultivate a vivid expectation that such a sweet development is indeed possible.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): According to humorist Dave Barry, “The method of learning Japanese recommended by experts is to be born as a Japanese baby and raised by a Japanese family, in Japan.” As you enter an intensely educational phase of your astrological cycle, I suggest you adopt a similar strategy toward learning new skills and mastering unfamiliar knowledge and absorbing fresh information. Immerse yourself in environments that will efficiently and effectively fill you with the teachings you need. A more casual, slapdash approach just won’t enable you to take thorough advantage of your current opportunities to expand your repertoire.

52. "____ Breath You Take" (#1 hit by the Police) 53. Dirt road feature 57. Fire hydrant attachment 58. Lasting reminder 61. Uno + uno 62. Bespectacled Disney dwarf 63. Prez on pennies 64. Basics of school learning, in brief 65. Coffee alternative

Last week’s answers

MAY 16, 2019 | 77

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “All human nature vigorously resists grace because grace changes us and the change is painful,” wrote author Flannery O’Connor.

I think that’s an observation worth considering. But I’ve also seen numerous exceptions to her rule. I know people who have eagerly welcomed grace into their lives even though they know that its arrival will change them forever. And amazingly, many of those people have experienced the resulting change as tonic and interesting, not primarily painful. In fact, I’ve come to believe that the act of eagerly welcoming change-inducing grace makes it more likely that the changes will be tonic and interesting. Everything I’ve just said will especially apply to you in the coming weeks.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Capricorn author Henry Miller wrote that his master plan was “to remain what I am and to become more and more only what I am—that is, to become more miraculous.” This is an excellent strategy for your use. The coming weeks will be a favorable time to renounce any tendency you might have to compare yourself to anyone else. You’ll attract blessings as you wean yourself from imagining that you should live up to the expectations of others or follow a path that resembles theirs. So here’s my challenge: I dare you to become more and more only what you are—that is, to become more miraculous.

18. Med. plan option 22. Not as much 23. Be of ____ (help) 24. Prize that comes with 9 million kronor 25. Tossed ____ 27. ____ and aahs 28. When doubled, dance of the 2010s 30. Old-time teacher 31. "Young Frankenstein" lab assistant 34. Bit of finger food 36. Whacks 37. Unfunny, as a joke 38. Jobs for plumbers 39. Yo, she was Adrian 40. Schindler of "Schindler's List" DOWN 42. Hathaway of "Ocean's 1. Big step for a young company, for short Eight" 2. Skype annoyance 44. "Alley ____!"

3. It's inhaled 46. 1980 film with the #1 4. Mardi ____ hit "Magic" 5. Glimpse 48. One-named "Parks 6. Verb that's a homophone for a letter and Recreation" actress 7. Title for Lancelot 49. "____, truth is the 8. Playing hooky, say first casualty": Aeschylus 9. Message that might include an "@" and a "#" 50. "Kathy Griffin: My Life 10. Company rule on the ____" (Emmy11. ____ acid (protein builder) winning reality show) 12. Stubble remover 51. Barbs 13. Snide remarks

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VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): It’s time for you to reach higher and dig deeper. So don’t be a mere tinkerer nursing a lukewarm interest in mediocre stories and trivial games. Be a strategic adventurer in the service of exalted stories and meaningful games. In fact, I feel strongly that if you’re not prepared to go all the way, you shouldn’t go at all. Either give everything you’ve got or else keep it contained for now. Can you handle one further piece of strenuous advice, my dear? I think you will thrive as long as you don’t settle for business as usual or pleasure as usual. To claim the maximum vitality that’s available, you’ll need to make exceptions to at least some of your rules.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Author Hélène Cixous articulated a poetically rigorous approach to love. I’ll tell you about it, since in my astrological opinion you’re entering a phase when you’ll be wise to upgrade and refine your definitions of love, even as you upgrade and refine your practice of love. Here’s Cixous: “I want to love a person freely, including all her secrets. I want to love in this person someone she doesn’t know. I want to love outside the law: without judgment. Without imposed preference. Does that mean outside morality? No. Only this: without fault. Without false, without true. I want to meet her between the words, beneath language.”

1. Connective tissue that gets its name from a Latin word meaning "gristle" 6. Fresh ____ daisy 9. Ski lift varieties 14. Duos 15. Barbecue bone 16. Longtime Rolling Stones bassist Bill 17. Mapmakers 19. Spouse of Alexander Hamilton 20. ____ orch.

21. First Lady between Lou and Bess 23. Young ____ (kids) 26. "The Powerpuff Girls" TV channel 29. "Me, too!"

32. Honey Bunches of ____ 33. Full discretionary power 35. Did business with 41. It's enough to make you cry 42. To the extent that 43. Hemingway title character 44. Its contents are often poured into a cereal bowl 45. Nerve cell part 47. Instagram filter shade 48. Printmaker's durable sheet 54. Patriotic org. founded in 1889 55. Jazz up 56. Sounds of hesitation 59. Certain close-knit social media group 60. Message clicked on by an online buyer ... or a hint to solving 1-, 17-, 26-, 33-, 44-, 48- or 71-Across 66. It fires electrodes 67. ____-wop 68. Buffalo NHL player 69. Like many student films 70. George Lucas' alma mater: Abbr.

71. The late 1970s, politically

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LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): During summers in the far northern land of Alaska, many days have 20 hours of sunlight. Farmers take advantage of the extra photosynthesis by growing vegetables and fruits that are bigger and sweeter than crops grown farther south. During the Alaska State Fair every August, you can find prodigies like 130-pound cabbages and 65-pound cantaloupes. I suspect you’ll express a comparable fertility and productiveness during the coming weeks, Leo. You’re primed to grow and create with extra verve.

So let me ask you a key question: to which part of your life do you want to dedicate that bonus power?

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): There’s a certain problem that has, in my opinion, occupied too much of your attention. It’s really rather trivial in the big picture of your life, and doesn’t deserve to suck up so much of your attention. I suspect you will soon see things my way, and take measures to move on from this energy sink. Then you’ll be free to focus on a more interesting and potentially productive dilemma—a twisty riddle that truly warrants your loving attention. As you work to solve it, you will reap rewards that will be useful and enduring.

ACROSS

No math is involved. The grid has numbers, but nothing has to add up to anything else. Solve the puzzle with reasoning and logic. Solving time is typically 10 to 30 minutes, depending on your skill and experience.

Go to realastrology.com for Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text-message horoscopes.

Audio horoscopes also available by phone at 877-873-4888 or 900-950-7700.

CART

BY DAVID LEVINSON WILK

Complete the grid so that each row, column, diagonal and 3x3 square contain all of the numbers 1 to 9.

B R E Z S N Y

© 2019

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SUMMONS BY PUBLICATION IN THE SALT LAKE CITY DEPT. OF THE THIRD JUDICIAL DISTRICT COURT, SALT LAKE COUNTY, STATE OF UTAH. CASE NO. 189918414, JUDGE KEITH KELLY. CASCADE COLLECTIONS LLC, PLAINTIFF V. NINA BUSHONG, DEFENDANT. THE STATE OF UTAH TO NINA BUSHONG: You are summoned and required to answer the complaint that is on file with the court. Within 21 days after the last date of publication of this summons, you must file your written answer with the clerk of the court at the following address: 450 S State St., Salt Lake City, UT 84111, and you must mail or deliver a copy to plaintiff’s attorney Chad C. Rasmussen at 2230 N University Pkwy., Ste. 7E, Provo, UT 84604. If you fail to do so, judgment by default will be taken against you for the relief demanded in the complaint.

This lawsuit is an attempt to collect a debt of $1,722.23. /s/ Chad C. Rasmussen

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Downtown Dust

I can’t keep up with all of the construction along the Wasatch Front. From roadwork on the Mountain West Corridor and the neverending Lehi road mess to the airport, prison, inland port and all the high-rises going up—phew! But, for the millionth time, those tall buildings are apartments, office buildings and hotels, not condos for sale!

As long as there’s easy money from banks and tax breaks from the federal government, you’ll keep seeing apartment complexes being built.

Salt Lake City’s Redevelopment Agency just approved a $7 million loan to help construct a luxury hotel smack-dab against the Union Pacific depot at The Gateway. And Athens Hotel Development is dropping almost $80 million to add another five-star hotel downtown. Of the 13 five-star hotels in Utah, 10 are in Park City. The other two are the Grand America and Hotel Monaco.

The odd one out (No. 13) is Amangiri at Canyon Point in Southern Utah.

The Salt Palace Convention Center will get a 28-story hotel on the corner of 200 South and West Temple. This behemoth will have more than 700 guest rooms, three-story video displays outside (think the electronic billboards in Las Vegas), ground-level shops, a rooftop garden, a 25,000-square-foot ballroom and possibly a small grocer. The light pollution from those screens will be horrific—but nobody seems to care about that when it’s billed by designers as “giving a vibrancy at night to downtown.” The cost estimate is $337 million. It’s a project from two private developers with the support of Salt Lake County, and it should be finished by 2022—about the same time Temple Square will re-open.

Oh, you didn’t hear? Yes, Temple Square will be closed for about four years starting December 2019 for a huge remodel. The LDS Church intends to take down the walls around the Temple block.

And let’s talk about food establishments.

The owners of the hugely successful Sapa restaurant are in talks with SLC planners to develop a food alley with small retail stores on the northeast corner of 800 South and State Street. It’s refreshing to see a woman—Mai Nguyen, head chef and owner of the Sapa Group—succeed and plan to invest more money into our local economy.

The 100-year old tea houses she brought over from Vietnam to grace the patio of Sapa are insanely beautiful. Watch this area of town closely as we all pace back and forth to see what development will land on the old Sears block across the street. n Content is prepared expressly for Community and is not endorsed by City Weekly staff.

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WEIRD

Florida!

Police officers in Indialantic, Fla., responded to at least seven calls about a man disturbing the peace on April 7. Patrons of Starbucks and Sassy Granny’s Smoothies, among others, were startled when 61-year-old Thomas Devaney Lane started yelling, calling himself “the saint” and threatening to unleash his army of turtles on the community. According to WKMG, Lane went along with an officer to the police station, where he screamed at the dispatcher and pounded on the walls, but then left the building. He was located later at a 7-Eleven, verbally assaulting customers. As officers stood by, Lane called 911 and told the dispatcher, “I need to leave now or you will all be sorry you (expletive) with the saint.” Lane was charged with disturbing the peace, resisting arrest without violence and misusing 911.

The Way the World Works In Nashville, Tenn., as the NFL Draft was taking over the town, brides and bridesmaids celebrating bachelorette parties were confounded by the crowds. WZTV reported on April 25 that the influx of crazed football fans was cramping the style of several groups: “We come here to listen to country music, not hang out with football boys,” pouted a bride named Cara. “I’ll tell you who’s going to pay for this. My husband. No football next season,” threatened a bridesmaid named Cyndi. But a bride named Savannah was more Zen about the situation: “We’re gonna make the best of it. It is what it is.”

Lame Why spend all that money on a real vacation when you can just fake a trip to an iconic destination? That’s the service offered by Fake a Vacation, a Nebraska company that offers to superimpose you in a photo from a popular vacation spot, such as Las Vegas

You Know You’ve Thought of It United Press International reported on April 25 that the Arizona Department of Public Safety arrested yet another driver using a dummy in the passenger seat to cruise in the HOV lane along State Route 202. “Don’t let this be you,” the department’s Twitter feed warned. The mannequin in this case was dressed as a woman.

Awesome!

Idahoans embraced the Big Idaho Potato, a 28-foot-long steel-and-plaster potato constructed in 2012 to mark the Idaho Potato Commission’s 75th anniversary. It’s been traveling the country ever since, promoting Idaho’s biggest crop, and the plan was for it to be retired this year, when Big Idaho Potato 2.0 arrives. But Kristie Wolfe had a better idea. The tiny house builder has converted the sculpture into a single-room hotel (aptly called the Big Idaho Potato Hotel), reported USA Today. It features a queen bed, two chairs and a bathroom with a whirlpool and skylight for stargazing; Wolfe lists it on Airbnb for $200 per night. “It’s a way of inviting people to experience Idaho in a unique way,” remarked Frank Muir, CEO of the Idaho Potato Commission.

Babs De Lay

Broker/Owner 801-201-8824 babs@urbanutah.com www.urbanutah.com Selling homes for 35 years in the Land of Zion

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY

Family Values A 33-year-old man from Pittsburgh, Pa., was arraigned April 29 on two counts of abuse of a corpse and one count of criminal mischief after he flushed his grandparents’ ashes down the toilet.

The Tribune-Review reported that Thomas Porter Wells was living at his mother’s house when she became fed up with his drinking and marijuana use and asked him to leave last September.

Denise Porter told police she learned from a relative in February that Wells had disposed of her parents’ remains, which had been stored in a box as part of a memorial in her bedroom, before leaving. Wells denied flushing the ashes, but he later texted his mother that he would flush her remains, too, after she died.

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The High Price of Vanity A “vampire facial” is a procedure during which blood is drawn with a needle and then “spun” to separate the plasma, which is then injected into the face. For customers of a spa in Albuquerque, N.M., though, the most lasting effects might come after a blood test. The state’s Department of Health is urging customers of VIP Spa, which closed in September 2018, to undergo HIV testing after two people were infected following treatment there. Dr. Dean Bair of the Bair Medical Spa said people should always make sure they’re going to a licensed facility for such procedures. “This is just the worst example of what can go wrong,” he told KOAT. The spa closed after inspectors found the spa’s practices could potentially spread bloodborne infections, including hepatitis B and C as well as HIV. Smooth Reactions An unnamed Ogden, Utah, woman who accused her boyfriend of cheating added emphasis to the charge in a most unusual manner on April 27, according to a Salt Lake County Jail report. The 23-year-old was with her boyfriend in the parking lot of a strip mall in Sandy when she “took her clothing off as she accused the boyfriend of cheating. ... The incident took place in a busy public area with constant vehicle and pedestrian traffic.” KSL Channel 5 reported the woman told police she stripped because “her boyfriend doesn’t want her anymore.” She was arrested for disorderly conduct and lewdness involving a child.

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MAY 16, 2019 | 79

Inexplicable The Lankenau Medical Center in suburban Philadelphia was the site of a break-in on the morning of April 20, but it was the stolen loot that leaves us scratching our heads. Two men and a woman stuffed several colonoscopes worth $450,000 into three backpacks. The scopes are used to examine colons during colonoscopies. “This is not something that a typical pawn shop might accept,” said Lower Merion Police Det. Sgt. Michael Vice. “My feeling would be that it was some type of black market sales.” He also told WCAU that it’s not yet clear whether it was an inside job.

or the Grand Canyon, for posting on your social media pages. According to United Press International, they’ll even offer you some fun facts about the place you choose to help you make your trip stories more legit. Packages start at $19.99; no word on what it costs to get your dignity back.

| COMMUNITY |

Least Competent Criminal One way to assure a negative response to a job application is to lift a few items from your prospective employer on the way out.

So it went for an unnamed 36-year-old man in Gillette, Wyo., who visited a Sportsman’s Warehouse on April 24, where he paid for some items with a rewards card but also left the store with some bullets and a pair of sunglasses. Two days later, the Gillette News Record reported, the man returned and asked to fill out a job application, then walked out with two more pairs of sunglasses worth $85. This time, workers called police, who arrested the man and recovered all the stolen items.

GRADUATES

| CITYWEEKLY.NET |

Running Out of Time Lukas Bates, 30, of southeastern England, dreamed big while running the London Marathon on April 28, according to Fox News. In addition to finishing, Bates hoped to secure a Guinness world record as the fastest runner dressed as an iconic building.

His costume, the tower known as Big Ben in London, rose several feet above his head—and that, it turns out, is what tripped him up. As Bates approached the finish line, his costume got caught on the scoreboard structure overhead. Finally a sympathetic race steward helped Bates free himself and make it over the finish line in three hours, 54 minutes and 21 seconds—missing by only 20 seconds the record held by Richard Mietz, who ran last year’s Berlin Marathon dressed as Germany’s Holstentor gate.

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