twice birthed

An interview with Martin Dunkley by Jenny Wonderling

that someone can be born once more and can truly recognize all that. I hear, smell, and process things differently. I am simply not the same person. And, in fact, she did what she was supposed to do as a mother, she did her “job.” She was the best mom anyone could ask for and she “went” before me, for a mother is not supposed to buryhersonordaughter.

I’ve found that the emotional/spiritual work you do prior to such a loss is very important and that is why the journey with grief can be destructive or unintentional. Instead, I’ve experienced this true discovery with all of my cells. And one of the things I’ve noticed is that, since her death, I’ve had an internal battle going on. My mind accepts what happened and can recognize that she’s free of pain and in a better place. My spirit can appreciate that she’s a part of everything now and that I can access her all the time. But my flesh and myhearttelltheotherstoshutthe hell up! I just want to feel and hear her, hug her. I know you can’t exist as a spiritual being without recognizingthatyoucan’tdestroyenergy or the spirit. So I can see that because I have this battle within me, thereisnotabalancewithinmyself.

What I am learning is that we shouldn’t fear the inevitable, and dying is the ultimate fear. That’s probably the reason I am grieving the way I am. It makes me wonder why we don’t offer a class in school to help children to change this perception in a ceremonial way, so that individuals like myself wouldn’t go through it this way. Instead it could be a celebration to recognize sooner how it is through death that she now has superpowers. She has actually become supernatural! And with those new powers she has helped me pay betterattentiontothesmallthings, helping my heart to really look. Like this. This is our moment, now, to connect fully. Grief is allowing me to better appreciate, and love what I may not have noticed before.SoI’mgrateful,too.”

Dorothy I. Murray, age 79, passed peacefully at the MidHudson Regional Hospital inPoughkeepsie, NY on August 5th, 2022, surrounded by her loved ones. She was born on July 3rd, 1943, to Wilhelmina and Cornelius Murray, in Kingston, Jamaica W.I. Dorothy worked as an LPN in New York City at the Jacobi Hospital in Bronx NY and New York Presbyterian Hospital in New York, NY. She is survived by her five daughters: Leila, AnnMarie, SandraDee, Claudia and Denise; and two sons: Ivan and Martin, as well as 23 grandchildren and 16 great-grandchildren. She was predeceased by her parents Wilhelmina and Cornelius Murray, and only brother, Leaford (Jiggs) Murray. Dorothy dedicated her life to her kids and grandkids and was passionate about her role as a homemaker. She was also an excellent cook, which culminated in her becoming the face of, and inspiration for, the Seasoned Delicious Foods brand. Affectionately called “Momma Blossom,” she was loved and adored by all who met her. She will be greatly missed.