The Prevailing of the Righteous
Demell Govan
The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people at-risk of, victims of, or perpetrators of violence in El Salvador. In 2017 this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high quality opportunities that nourish the minds, expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising and publishing memoirs, participants develop self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie and positive self-projection to author new life narratives.
Since January 2017 ConTextos has partnered with Cook County Sheriff's Office to implement Authors Circle in Cook County Department of Corrections as part of a vision for reform that recognizes the value of mental health, rehabilitation and reflection. These powerful memoirs complicate the narratives of violence and peace building, and help author a hopeful future for human beings behind walls, their families and our collective communities.
While each author’s text is solely the work of the Author, the images used to create this book’s illustrations have been sourced by various print publications. Authors curate these images and then, using only their hands, manipulate the images through tearing, folding, layering and careful positioning. By applying these collage techniques, Authors transform their written memoirs into illustrated books.
This project is being supported, in whole or in part, by federal award number ALN 21.027 awarded to Cook County by the U.S. Department of the Treasury.
The Prevailing of the Righteous
Demell Govan
1/2
I alwayshad a problem with authorityfigures who abusetheir power.I'm goingto make yourlife a livinghell.That’s whathetold mejustthree monthsin,which ultimatelyled metolosing2 years oftime andthisis one ofthe reasons why.
Well,IfirstgottoIllinoisRiveronmyb-dayin2019.Thiswasmyfourthtimetoprison,soIknewhowtheinsand outsworkedinprison.WhenImadeitoutoftheintakeprocess,Iwasputon3house,onCwingincell20.
I had an old white man as a celly. I won't say his name. All I know was that his vibe and energy level was weird. We didn’t have anything in common at all. I mean nothing!
Now here it is, I've been here for two months and they still haven’t deleted my old numbers. So at this time IDOC let you call any numbers straight through without having to put it on a phone list, you only had to put in a new phone list to delete the old numbers that you didn’t want anymore and all you can have is 30 numbers on your phone list.
SosinceIllinoisRiverhadn ’tdeletedmyoldnumbersafterbeingthereforthreemonths,Istartedtopayother inmatestogivemetheirpinnumberstothephonesoIcouldgetotp.Man,amonthintomehavingother peoplespinnumbers,IAcalledmetooperationsoneSaturdaymorning.
WhenIgottheretheyaskedmehowwasIusingthephoneandItoldhimIpicked upthephoneanddialedanumber.AtthispointIknowtheyonmyasssoIsay fuckit,I
’mabealittlesmartasscuztheywannaplaygamesandaskme questionsthattheyknowtheanswersto.
They showed me two people’s pictures and asked if I knew them and I told them I see them on the wing every day. I see them getting frustrated at this point because they can’t get me, well should I say, trick me.
They say… well they is really one of the main IA dudes. His name was Adams. Well anyways, Adams says he got a number that they hear my name on or both of the dudes phone list who he showed me the pictures of.
Then he tells me that they opened up the C grade wing and if I don’t want to end up over there, stop using other peoples pin numbers and he also said he wasn’t going to write me up. I told him I ain’t know nothing, I just wanna do my time as smoothly as possible and he tells me it’s all up to me.
In my mind I’m telling myself that I just dodged a ticket, so I’ma fall back on using other dudes pins. Man, next day early I get a typed up ticket from Adams. I tell myself since he went against his word and still wrote me up, I’m still finna use the other dudes pins, so I come back from lunch, put a popper in the cell door, and when the top side dayroom came out, I popped out.
Man, aboutfive minutes afterI getdone usingthe phone, people yelling“IA in thebubble2x” soI tried to sneakback to the cell,but theylocked in on mycell. Theycome in and go straight to mycell and start goingthrough mybox.
I cometothedoor andaskthemwhytheygoingin mybox andAdamsaskedwhyI’m out of mycell usingthe phone again.AtthispointI’mtakingAdamsforwhathe reallyis:“12” alltheway.Itellhim,
“whyyouwriteme aticketwhen yousaid youwasn’t goingto?” and“get yo assout mycell,goofy.”
He then tells me he’s going to the C-Grade Deck and that he is going to make my life a living hell. I tell him he can’t make my life a living hell because he don’t and can’t have control over my brain. In that instance, I felt boxed in, angry and disgusted. Not by him, but by myself because here it is, I’m following a continued pattern of rebellion against power-stricken authority figures. Even though I know this dude is goofy, I’m feeling even more goofier than him.
As it happens, I’m on the C-grade wing two weeks later because of this ticket Adams wrote. Man, this C-grade wing is something different. No phones, no TVs in the cell, just all privilege is gone.
Here it is though, we got yard with a regular wingthree times a week and it’s4 to5 workingphones on the yard.Now everybodyknow thatI stayto myself and allIdo is get otpand with us goingto the yard with a regular wing,I can use the phone.
So my30days on C-Grade wingisfinally over. I get moved to a regular wing,but now the onlythingis that I’m on B-Grade and I can only get to use the phone two times a week on my pin number.
Yeah these MFS finally decided to delete my old numbers from my previous bid but only when I got moved to the C-Grade wing. Now with me being on B-Grade on a regular wing, I feel like “fuck it,” so I start using other people’s pin numbers again and having people give me 3ways, but mostly 3ways. So three weeks in, here come Adams with his crew of IA buddies.
These mfs wait three weeks, just one week away from getting back to A-grade, and they give me not one, not two, not three but four major tickets. I go hear the tickets, and they found me guilty on all four, even the false trumped up charges for the three ways.
Nowthemainchargeisa211whichispossessionofpersonalinformation,basically havingotherpeople’spinnumbers.Withthe3waysIneverhadpossessionofpins becausetheywoulddialtheirownpinsandcalltheirownpeopleandgiveme3ways.
Soyouseehowtheywereoutforme.
Well as it goesI’mfound guiltyon allfour tickets and nowI’mback on theC-Grade wing,but onlythis time it’s notfor30days,it’sfor eight months, plusI gotfive months ofdayroom restriction and at this time theytook45days worth of good timefrom me.
At this time I’m in school for horticulture and I'm trying to get good time. The IA squad see my rebellion and attitude towards them as war and honestly I see it the same way, and I only see it this way because Adams told me that he was going to make my life a living hell. Now that I’m back on the C-grade wing, IA doesn’t want me back on a regular wing.
Man, when I tell you, it’s like they got an APB on me with all the C/Os. I started getting tickets for stupid shit like standing on the first step while waiting to go back to the wing from school. I lost 30 days good time for a minor ticket.
Soatthispointwithmelosingalittleoverayearandahalfoftime Istartedgoingtothelawlibrarytogetanunderstandingoftherulesand regulationsofnotjusttheinmates,butfortheC/Osandstaffmembersaswell.
OnceIstartedreadingwhatcanandcan ’tbedonebyinmatesandstaffalike(readingbetweenthefinelines),Istartedwritinggrievances.
At first IRCC was denying all of my grievances, so I learned that I had to mail them to Springfield after they get denied. On top of this, I started having my OG, brothers, and other loved ones calling the warden and calling Springfield because I was being targeted and was starting to get unjust treatment.
After all this, Covid hit and I’m finally getting all of the time back that they took from me.
Once Covid hit they shut down the C-Grade deck; now everything is back to normal for the most part as far as prison goes.
So allin allI’mbackinthe mix of regular prisonlife andI’m now earninggoodtime. So yeah,I end upgoinghome earlierthan myoriginal outdate.
I Am From
I'm from Roseland
From downhill in Granny's porch
Demell Govan
I am from backyard functions and BB guns
I am from with shorties be our past curfew
And don't hang on that corner, it's not for you
From OG and Ms. Sturdivant
From Mom and son is first date
And from watch what you show cuz friends hate
I'm from a hard head
And from a smart ass
I'm from Mind Over Matter
I'm from blank yellow stares???
From Soul Food is the best food
From Theresa's sacrifices and happiness
I'm from stars shine in any scenery
Until the lion learns to write their own story, tales of the hunt will always glorify the hunter - African Proverb
