My Interpretation Of by Jeffery Meegan

Until the lion learns to write their own story, tales of the hunt will always glorify the hunter - African Proverb The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people at-risk of, victims of, or perpetrators of violence in El Salvador. In 2017 this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high quality opportunities that nourish the minds,,expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising and publishing memoirs, participants develop self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie and positive selfprojection to author new life narratives.

Since January 2017 ConTextos has partnered with Cook County Sheriff's Office to implement Authors Circle in Cook County Department of Corrections as part of a vision for reform that recognizes the value of mental health, rehabilitation and reflection. These powerful memoirs complicate the narratives of violence and peace building, and help author a hopeful future for human beings behind walls, their families and our collective communities.

While each author’s text is solely the work of the Author, the image used to create this book’s illustrations have been sourced by various print publications. Authors curate these images and then, using only their hands, manipulate the images through tearing, folding, layering and careful positioning. By applying these collage techniques, Authors transform their written memoirs into illustrated books.

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My Interpretation Of Jeffrey Meegan

Telling the story is the first step. If you can tell it, you can write it. When you tell the story it opens up the mind, heart and soul. To feel something you are used to pushing down deep. When you push it down it feels depressing. So tell your story, write your story. It will be a game changer.

The things we write and tell will change the way you feel. So ask yourself how do I want to feel now and the rest of my life? Write how you feel then ask yourself how did I feel before I wrote down my story. Then write down how you feel after. My bet is you will feel better. So just like Nike says, just do it. Tell me if I’m wrong so I can learn.

You can learn. Everyone who reads it or hears it will learn.

It is not easy to stay strong when everyone thinks you’re weak. I just want to tell the world that when everything feels like it is out of control and really hard, that is just where God wants you to be. Just the way God wants it to be, so we can learn.

So when the going gets tough, the tough get going. I feel even when people hate me I still love them. I like to say forgive them, they know not what they do. Well they don’t know what they are doing because the devil, which is anger, is taking control and trying to hurt us. They want to help people in literal terrains and physical terrains.

We all will see God’s light whether we want it or not. One time in our lives when we are young or old God will come. Seek and you will find. Ask and it will be given. Knock and it will be opened. I just want to help people see that God is real and God is in all our stories. Just have faith, hope and love, most of all love for God. He will not give you more than you can handle.

Well my hope is to find a way to help all the people in jail to see GOD'S light. We all have eyes, but we don't see. It really is hard to see with our eyes closed. So my mission is to open eyes that are closed and hearts that are broken. Just like my story needs to be told, everyone has a story that needs to be heard. I know it's not easy to write down what is going on or what has happened or will happen.

But if we try, the key word is try to do what we think is impossible, we will find that that is when God steps in to help give you the push. So I hope I can give someone a push. too. Because I am starting to learn how much writing can help us cope with our problems.

Getting it out is a real game changer. No one is weak.

Damn I miss my mom. I would sleep in one of those bug ridden beds the rest of my life if I could get one last night with her. So when I was younger me and my mom used to go grabbing and picking. It was a fun hobby. We would find cool stuff, new stuff, old stuff and sell it and make a lot of money. We really liked to help people out. If they had nowhere to go we would bring them home, same with families. So a lot of times they would need clothes, food or a bed and we always have extra because we grabbed it from the garbage.

This one time we got this really nice bed and we gave it to him. The next day he said he got bit up, so we took the bed and burned it. When we burned it a lot of bugs and spiders came running out of it. So we stopped getting beds out of the garbage lol.

Well I guess I never talked about the time I saved my mom's life when she had an overdose. My little sister came running and screaming out of our mom's room. There was a family Thanksgiving party going on and my little sister said Mom was blue and not breathing. She looks dead! I ran as fast as I could to her room and she was blue in the face and not breathing. I asked God what do I do? And my body kicked into action.

I did not know what I was doing, but I picked her up and brought her to the bathtub. I started to shout for someone to get ice because something was telling me to shock her with cold water. My Aunt J came with the ice, so I filled the tub up with ice water and put her in it. It woke her up and I fell to my knees and thanked God for the help to do what I did.

Thank you GOD and I love you mom!

Well it happened when I was 11.

I was at school and I got called to the office, I thought I was in trouble. My aunt was on the phone and she asked if I wanted to come home early. I asked why but she said because your brothers and sister are coming home early, so you want to? Something felt funny, but I pushed it down and I said I want to stay because I was going to have practice for track. She said I can't go to practice, I have to come home after school. She said she already talked to my coach. It was ok. I was a little disappointed, but I knew something was up. So I finished school that day, got on the bus and went home.

Everybody was really sad when I got there. I already knew it was about mom. I didn't know what it was because we hadn't seen her in three days. They made me go into the bed room and sit down. Then my dad came in with my aunt and they were crying. I said, “it's mom, right?” They said, "how do I know.?" I said, “because I feel it. I don't care what happened, please don't tell me.” My dad and brothers got mad at me because I did not want to hear it.

So I ran to the barn and started working with the horses and my Aunt Juley came out and asked why I didn't want to hear what happened. I said, “because mom taught me to always think the best, but know the worst.” Then she said do I want to hear a story your mom loved? She says it's about a tree that gets stronger every year no matter what it goes through.

So she got me to open up and hear what happened to my mom. So I asked do you think I need to hear it? She said yes, because we need your thoughts on the situation. Well, the nurses said a van pulled up outside the hospital and pushed your mom out on the ground then took off. She was unresponsive. They took her in and tried to hit her with narcan, but she didn't respond. So all they could do at that point is hook her up to a bunch of machines to keep her alive.

She was on them for over three days and the doctor said we had to make a choice. If she was going to come out of it she would be brain dead. So the choices were to keep her on the machines and hope she starts breathing on her own, but she will be brain dead, or pull the plug.

Well that's what they needed me for. After that I told them to remember how much fire she had and all the great stuff she used to love doing for all of us and others. If she could not do what she wanted and loved, and not be there mentally, she would be pissed if we did not let her go. I said you all know her bad side, the melted mac and cheese spoon LOL!!! If it was you, what would you want? I told them to pull the plug.

It's ok, God has her now. She is free of pain…

My mom died of a drug overdose and I had nowhere to go. There was a guy trying to kick me out of my mom’s house or pay $3000 a month to stay there. I did not want to leave there, so I walked 6 miles to the nearest farm and asked if they needed help with the horses.

They said they already had a guy for that so I said I will do it for half the money he is doing it for. Please, I need a job so they let me clean horse poop for 10 stables for $100.

It took me about four hours then I walked to the next farm 2 miles away and did the same thing. Then I did it. All I’m trying to say is no matter what may happen, we all shovel shit in life to get where we need to get.

Well I started drinking and smoking when my mom passed away. I never talked to no one about it, but I was looking to God and I never found him out here. So I pushed everything down and used drinking and drugs to cope with it. But now that I'm in jail, I see life more clearly. I found God right here. He was in the darkest corner to help the sinners. So I see that God brought me here to show me that the way I have been looking for was hard and scary.

To everyone who hasn't felt needed, there was a time when I didn't want to live. I asked God to take me so I could be with my mom. I used to say to myself this is too hard, please take me. I would go to the barn and find love and happiness in the animals. I saw that they needed me more than I needed my mom. So when you think you're not needed you just need to look outside your own needs. Someone or something might need you.

No matter what, we are all needed. Don't give up, this is only the beginning.

That’s how I know that this writing class is God’s class. Johnny Page’s class, Lisa’s class, all my brothers in the circle’s class, my class. Man I’m not lying, this writing class is changing lives. I can only hope that someone sees what I’m saying and writing. So this is me in God’s story.

Just as you have heard our brother Jonathan’s story, God wants us, we are God’s workers. God will come get you when you least expect it. In the blink of an eye God will transform everything in your life. It’s in the end. God is the heart of our stories.

We just need to write it. Tell it. Hear it. Then you will feel it.

This writing class is healing people, changing people for the love of God. Don’t stop. Don’t give up.

So what I found was not Bad people, but good people in Bad situations.

Thank you ConTextos. God bless all that is involved in making this possible, nothing but love.

There’s alw ays light a t the end

of the tunn el.

Telling the story is the first step.

To everyone who has not felt needed

There was a time when I did not want to live.

I asked God to take me so I could be with my Mom. I used to say to myself this is too hard, Please take me.

Then I would go to the barn and find real love and happiness in the animals And I seen that they need me more than I needed my mom So even you think you’re not needed, You just need to look outside your own needs Because someone or something might need you.

We are all needed.

Jeffery Meegan I Am From I am from Peotone, Monee From horses and animals.

I am from the farm I am from hay fields and the pond.

I’m from Papa and Nana, From taking care of horses, Animals and people.

I’m from keep on the sunny side.

And from stay still, calm down I am from God Alpha and Omega.

I’m from Saint Mary’s From little huggies and Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving and Halloween.

From the Backoffs and the Meegans I am from the light of love.

I am from a miracle of love.

Until the lion learns to write their own story, tales of the hunt will always glorify the hunter - African Proverb Copyright

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