Speaking Our Truths: Reflections of Englewood Stem HS Students

Speaking Our Truths

Compilation of Ref lections of ESHS

The ConTextos Authors Circle was developed in collaboration with young people experiencing, navigating, surviving complex traumas in El Salvador. In 2017, this innovative program expanded into Chicago to create tangible, high quality opportunities that nourish the minds, expand the voices and share the personal truths of individuals who have long been underserved and underestimated. Through the process of drafting, revising, and publishing memoirs, participants strengthen self-reflection, critical thinking, camaraderie and positive self-projection to author new life narratives.

Speaking Our Truths is a compilation of memoirs from high school students of Englewood Stem High School. Through the CPS initiative WITT, We’re in This Together, ConTextos partnered with the ESHS learning community to provide meaningful supports, connections and opportunities for young people navigating multiple pandemics in the spring of 2021 in Chicago.

The memoirs in this compilation harness the power of complex truths and lift up important, authentic voices. Our thanks to everyone who made this journey possible: Chicago Public Schools, ESHS leadership team, the brave and talented authors.

May Speaking Our Truths complicate narratives and embolden the vision of vibrant futures for young people of ESHS and all generations near and far in Chicago..

In collaboration with

Speaking Our Truths Introduction COVID-19 has impacted life around the globe. In Chicago, students have navigated unprecedented educational and life waters. In the middle of March 2020, CPS students shifted from in person learning to receiving instruction online. This has been an unprecedented time in young people’s lives for many reasons.

Students learn and grow in the daily fabric of vibrant learning communities, through ongoing conversations and interactions that take place not only in classrooms but also throughout the school day in hallways, libraries, cafeterias with all generations. These levels of connection have been challenged for fifteen months and many young people have felt isolated.

Moreover the past year and a half has also seen a concentrated push for social justice, led by the Black Lives Matter’s movement, sparked by the murder of George Floyd at the hands of a Minneapolis police officer. Tension and righteous anger has become a daily backdrop of young people’s lives. Unsurprisingly, students have struggled.

Human beings seek to thrive, not merely survive. Speaking Our Truths is a ConTextos Authors Circle program that focuses on healing and nurtures the human instinct to tell stories of lived experience as a way to process and overcome challenges and trauma and engage key questions about the human experience such as identity and relationship to community.

Speaking Our Truths provided a platform and a gentle space for Authors to draft, revise, illustrate and publish their powerful stories while learning to give and accept feedback, strengthen reading and writing skills, build relationships with their facilitators and peers, and reflect upon the past to reimagine the future.

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D’Marionia Ja’Quan Ja’Wuan Jacorian Jasmine Trevion Jireh Kaylen Marshay Jaco Warren Tonnesha Kalief Ausar

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Stay strong and never give up.

I don’t back down from challenges.

I won’t stop. I’m not done.

Work hard to get very far.

Reach. Grind. Achieve. Complete. Steady Positivity.

-D’Marionia

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I Am

D’Marionia I am barrettes From flip flops and icee cups I am from the Southside 4 bedrooms, 8 people, 2 bathrooms crowded, excited I am from making mud salads Flowers, grass, and dirt I’m from church on sundays and loud aunties From Sabrina and Oscar I’m from athletes and singers From tooth fairy and Santa I’m from God, baptism I’m from St. Bernard Baked mac and cheese, greens, cornbread From the story of how my grandad so “strong” he knocked someone out The grandma’s house in the basement Auntie house’s kitchen Grandma’s living room and walls for all the athletes in my family

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Smooth Flight D’Marionia

May 20, 2019 I had my first trip to Florida. If you know me, you know I don’t like planes. Let’s rerun two days earlier. That Thursday, I got my hair done with pretty box braids. I was feeling myself and it wasn’t really hot, so it was going to last. I did a little shopping just to have clothes there. Time goes by and it’s Friday, my mom just took us out to eat and everything was just nice. Then the day came and I was kinda scared, but I had to put my pride aside and not think about it.

It’s now 4:30 and I had to get up and get ready for the flight. I had to make sure I had everything ready and organized before I left. Fast forward to 5:30 and we were on our way to the airport.

I just put all my pride to the side and it was time to get on the plane. I got on and overall it wasn’t that bad, it was smooth and I had fun in Orlando and got to see all the Disney characters :)

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Caring, thoughtful, remembrance, forgettable, thinking brighter Last chance, life can be breathtaking If you bleed you might succeed Get off your electronics. Get busy.

Train, rain, claim, insane, cane, blame -Ja’Quan

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I Am Ja’Quan

I am from Capri Sun. From apples and fruit punch.

I am from the trenches of Chicago.

Hot head, sweet, nice.

I am from the garden of raked leaves.

Leaves that fall from trees.

I’m from Thanksgiving and barbeque.

From Dad and Mom. I’m from football and basketball.

From bad lil kids and being smart and intelligent.

I’m from no religion, God. I’m from Chicago Hospital.

Fried chicken, barbeque ribs.

From my dad fought this dude who stole his money and got it back.

He told me that my mom almost bled out After a radio was thrown.

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Finally Fitting In Ja’Quan

Well first I’m going to start off by saying I’m finally fitting in this school. Every teacher I walk past I greet them with respect.

Showing other people how to properly converse with other fellows. Many times I have butterflies during the first day of school. I don’t need friends, I only need my teachers for support and more.

My household is crazy loud. I have to deal with my goofy siblings everytime I eat or go into the kitchen. I am always followed by one of them. I cook for them and they still show me attitude even though I think it’s the attitude of love. But I care for all of them.

My favorite shoes are Jordans. Jordan 13 and 12’s are my favorites. I have a lot of shoe recommendations. I have the choice to choose between dressing professionally or just dressing as me. I’m going to dress how I want because I can do whatever I feel. Dressing professionally can get me a long way, but I’d always want to be me.

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Be smart, and be aware Think in your mind. You’ll shine Don’t be scared, show less fear Trust family, outsiders can be enemies -Ja’Wuan

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I Am Ja’Wuan

I am from Illinois I am from the trenches OG house, gudda I am from sea weed I am from Thanksgiving and barbecue From The hospital

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Keep calm, and fight for power Be chill and play it cool Stay calm and become the future They only love you when you dying Stay calm and take control Little kid, big family, big expectations -Jacorian

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I Am Jacorian

I am from light up shoes From Ramen Noodles and lemon pepper wings I am from the two bedroom and closet with two sisters and one brother An apartment, crowded, bad and destructive I am from grass I stepped on Nice grass that I was told not to but did anyway I’m from family barbecues and look like my daddy From Rozalyn and Popson I’m from the loud and noisy From Easter Bunny and Tooth Fairy I’m from Christianity, having a relationship I’m from Roseland Hospital Mild sauce, chicken, pizza From the grandma who died at 34 from suicide The 14 year old girl who got pregnant at 18 Flooded basement, destroyed baby picture Overlooked photo albums that’s never forgotten

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I Am Jasmine

I am from coffee mugs From Steve Madden and Cheerios I am from the block filled with old people Peaceful, quiet, lit I am from the roses and tulips Blooming with beautiful colors I’m from Curtis and Taneisha From Mahammad and Princess I’m from the helping and snitching From being respectful and truthful I’m from Christianity, but still confused I’m from the south side of Chicago Macaroni, chicken From the two kids in high school The dying twice

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Old House Jasmine

My old house was my favorite house I’ve been at and I lived in the hood and suburbs. I can’t say it was peaceful but it wasn’t bad.

It was an apartment because there weren’t as many people in my family as it is now.

There are now 14 people in my family, not including certain people.

Most people were surprised because my house was big. My house was like the house everybody came over and a lot of people would think it was a big daycare. There was even a candy store in the building. Everybody was three blocks away. Plus it was the last house my grandparents were at because they are now deceased.

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I Am Trevion

I am from eating plain oatmeal From messed up shoes and Legos I am from the small house Wisconsin, Milwaukee, westside I am from playing in dirt Making mud pies and cake I’m from family parties and family reunions From Daquan and Davonta I’m from the good and bad From act your age and it’s a time and place to play I’m from a lack of church, and a lack of prayer I’m from Milwaukee Chicken, rice From the time my mother had to raise 7 kids by herself The brother Davonta who has asthma The pictures at my dad house The pictures we took with my dad when we were babies

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Was bad at math, now I’m good Be good, be great, never hate.

-Jireh

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I Am Jireh

I am from The Hood From football and air forces I am from the brickhouse on Loomis, busy, wide, sounds of passing cars I am from dandelions, trees, ponds Big, dirty, murky, I’m from family reunion and tall and loud From Ziyah and Sharee I’m from the protective and loyal From tooth fairy and Santa I’m from God, baptism I’m from St. Bernard Baked mac and cheese, greens, cornbread From look both ways before you cross the street and do my homework I’m from not going to church but believing in God

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The Warm Up Jireh

My first time playing basketball was when I was 10. I joined this program and this coach was teaching us new drills and stuff.

I went there everyday to get better at the sport. Then I became a teenager and I had to leave. Because of that I started playing football.

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Forever is not forever. Remember that Before felt nervous, now happy proud

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-Kaylen

I Am Kaylen

I am from Xbox From Nikes and Payless I am from the houses next to trap houses Poor, bad, the people on the block do bad things I am from fields next to my house filled with sunflowers and guns I’m from karaoke and charades From Deloris and Krystal I’m from the softness and chillness From to yourself and respectful I’m from Christianity, Church with family I’m from Chicago Home Run Inn, chicken From the family reunion in Atlanta The moving to the westside with my cousin Bedrooms, living rooms Photos and games

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Proud of My Progress Kaylen

My goals and dreams mean so much to me. If I fail I don’t think I could forgive myself, I know I came too far to give up. That’s my motivation and I try to listen to positive music and creative memories with my friends because life is too short. I’m big on these two saying “ Life goes on” and “forever is not forever” because the world won’t stop for nobody. You gotta keep going.

I’m proud of my progress and I want to acknowledge that because I feel I deserve it. I might be 15 about to be 16 on July 8th but I’ve grown a lot. My number one supporter passed away but I know my granny is with me everyday.

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We’re friends. I won’t stay mad.

I’m a goofy and cultural person.

Bring afros back. They’re so cool.

Can’t stay mad at my friends.

-Marshay

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I Am Marshay

I am from hot combs From hair gel and weave I am from the basement with a lot of grandkinds jumping, playfighting, warm I am from mud salads Dirt, leaf, and flower I’m from 4th of July and joking From Poodah and Chrissy I’m from athletes and business people From “we got food in the house” and “let me hold your money for you so you won’t lose it” I’m from God, I’m from Holy Cross Chitterlings, ribs From the story the used to tell about my cousin head Granny house My granny having a jacket with dirt on it from collecting dirt at my grandad’s grave

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Bump Set Spike Marshay

Hey, my name is Marshay. I’m 15 years old. I like to dance and play volleyball. The story I will be talking about is how I started playing volleyball. I started playing in 9th grade, which is now.

Before I started I thought I wasn’t going to like it so I tried it. My first practice was okay, we didn’t really do anything. The next day my volleyball coach told me that I made the team. Some of my friends ain’t make it, but they aint want to do it anyway.

Now I like it because it’s fun. I met new people and all. We won like five games. I will be trying it again next year.

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Quit playing games, press the gas Win in silence make them think you’re losing Win in silence, you’re not losing

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-Jaco

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When you want something, don’t stop.

Trust no one. Stay to yourself.

-Warren

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I Went Crazy Warren

First time I stepped on the court playing ball I was scared because I thought I was going mess up and sell the game. He put me in the game and I did my thing for the first time. But I aint going to lie to you when I first got in I did mess up, but I made up for it. I got back and shot four three’s and gave us the lead. After the game everybody was proud of me because I gave my team a twelve points and we were down by 9. So yeah, the first time I stepped on the court I went crazy.

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Went through things now I’m scared.

I was happy until I died.

He left me. Abandonment issues.

No more 6 word memoirs. Period.

-Tonnesha

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Started painting, ended up a lifestyle.

Figured it out. Figured out nothing.

Paid attention. Still no lunch money.

Head on a swivel. Stuck between.

Big Kid. Big City. Bigger Dreams.

Don’t be mediocre in your greatness.

-Kalief

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Letter to Englewood Kalief

Dear Englewood, Shout out to y’all for being inspiring. Yall inspire me, yall inspire each other, and you’re already inspiring the world. Inspiration and hope are the best gifts I believe you can give anyone. It can change someone’s life and if you’re lucky they’ll come back and tell you how your inspiration helped them in their life. Well I’m here to tell y’all that your inspiration has changed my life for the better. Our conversations were the highlight of my day and they will always stick with me. Even the conversations when yall thought Lupe Fiasco was mexican and a gospel singer. I hope one day you’ll understand how crazy that statement is. That’s the beauty of being allowed in the same space as you all and your unique and unapologetic perspectives. Do me a favor and never change that for anyone, ever. You are a product of your environment and your success will be a part of that, own it. You are the creative director of your life and you can make it into whatever you please. Live life without limitations, continue to ask “why?”, and continue to be you. Unapologetically you. Scream your truth or whisper it, at the end of the day it is still yours and no one can take that from you. I’m grateful that you all allowed me to at least hear a piece of your truth as it has helped me get closer to finding my own truth. That wouldn’t be possible without yall gift of inspiration and hope. The best gift ever, thank you.

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Reflection!

Ausar

Woke up in the morning and I thought about Well my mind was blank for a second Everyday is a canvas What you paint out should reverence The beliefs that you cherish We inherit trauma from a long line of fighters That have sparred till the stars seemed like stepping stools to look inside the mirror see that same shine in the lives of the kids Who were fibbed to and told this life not bigger than the crib and the blocks that they roam and the clicks they belong to How long till we finally break that mindset I sat inside a class full of talented writers One of em spoke right up Asked me about the write ups that we been studying Knowing we’d be publishing the words they had been writing down and journaling

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He asked if published do that make him an author forreal And that bothered me Cause just your words is enough You don’t need validation Can’t no stamp of approval Make or break what you saying Know your story is yours And that’s important enough Ain’t no difference in your work and any book you pick up It’s some lives you could touch Through your tales and I failed to realize as I spilled these emotions through my message That I was projecting how I felt he reminded me of me hope it don’t Take this long for him to get it

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