SELF-CARE ISN'T SELFISH

By Jheri Walters

We talk a lot about Secondary Trauma here at Child Advocates of Fort Bend. The definition is listed as “Secondary trauma is experienced indirectly through hearing details or witnessing the aftermath of a trauma experienced by another person. Those who work in helping professions (e.g., social workers, professional counsellors, first responders, and police officers) and the loved ones of trauma survivors are at a greater risk of experiencing secondary trauma or secondary trauma stress.”

Choosing Therapy.com goes to to say “Those who experience STS will have at least some of the symptoms that are commonly associated with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). A small proportion of these individuals will experience full-blown PTSD as a result of secondary trauma exposure. ” primary benefit of self-care is that it supports our mental health It helps us to relax and de-stress and can be a great way to improve our mood and be more present It can also help to boost our energy levels and allow us to sleep better Taking time out for ourselves can be something small or simple. If you need help figuring out where to start, that's okay.

This is where self-care comes into play. Self-care is so important, and yet it's something that we often neglect. We get so caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life that we forget to take care of ourselves; however, if we are not intentional about self-care, showing up for others in our lives can be challenging.

A primary benefit of self-care is that it supports our mental health. It helps us to relax and de-stress and can be a great way to improve our mood and be more present. It can also help to boost our energy levels and allow us to sleep better. Taking time out for ourselves can be something small or simple. If you need help figuring out where to start, that's okay. Below are a few self-care activities you can add to your monthly schedule!

Below are a few self-care activities you can add to your monthly schedule!

One day without the use of social media (or news)

One day spent outdoors (walking, sitting outside, or biking)

One breakfast/lunch/dinner date with friends to check in on them.

One day spent doing acts of service (volunteering, tutoring, etc.)

One day spent learning something new (even if it isn't a necessity)

One self-care day dedicated to renewing your energy.

One day spent being a tourist in your city or neighboring cities.

So, challenge yourself to take a few days out of the month for self-care. Whatever you do, ensure you ' re intentional about taking care of yourself physically and mentally. Your body and mind will thank you for it!

When we asked our staff what Self-care means to them and how they give themselves self-care, these were some of their answers.

Jheri Walters: Setting boundaries with myself to do things from a place of joy and sincerity. Not out of guilt.

Irene Wisner:

Pampering myself – getting a pedicure and manicure , coloring my hair , facial , etc.

Lizbeth Ocampo: Self-care to me means taking care of yourself; mentally, spiritually, and physically

Working out , massage, pampering myselfmani & pedi, nap, treat myself to something delicious!

Courtney James: My self-care includes going to the gym/staying active , spending time with my dog, and allowing myself to be lazy and lay on the couch and watch TV whenever that’s what my body/mind needs.

Lacy Starnes: I divide self-care into 3 buckets: stuff that makes my future self less stressed (i.e., meal prep, exercise , cleaning/organizing/planning type things), stuff that re-energizes me (i.e., mindfully enjoying time with my family, being outdoors , playing violin , more hobbytype activities), and recovery (i.e., extra sleep, treat meals , movie days, more indulgence-type things and basic needs). The trick is finding the balance between the three to stay functioning logistically, physically, and emotionally.

Luisa Bowers:

What I do varies on whether I am needing physical, emotional , spiritual or mental selfcare but includes any of the following: Adventures with family and friends , Gardening, Working out , Sleeping, Relaxing, Reading scripture, Learning something new.

Suzanne Slavin: I love to go down to Galveston on a weekend it’s those walks on the beach to reflect and rejuvenate with the sun out and the wind blowing. It’s definitely my happy place! That’s truly self care of my mind and spirit.

Carolyn Thesing: Self Care for me is “ me time”. Time to quilt and making time for Pilates.

Melissa Johnson: Being outside sitting on my front porch and watching the birds , squirrels, and butterflies listening to the sounds of nature and talking to God Taking a nice bubble bath , sipping wine , and listening to spa music Getting a massage, a manicure , and/or a pedicure

Ruthanne Mefford: For me , self-care is about getting away from routine with either quiet, alone time in a yoga class , a walk or gardening or the doing the complete opposite with fun , social time with family and friends over a great dinner and nice glass of wine.

Dana Mersiovsky: “Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise , trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.”

My solace is the ocean. A walk on the beach , combing for sea glass and other treasures is #1 on my list for self care. Fishing is a close #2!

Jen Brown: Self-care for me is being aware of when I need time to recharge or get regulated again. The way I do this is based on what I need at that moment- sometimes it’s a snack , sometimes it’s a book or time outdoors.

Brenda Zavala:

A lot of times when we think of self-care we think we have to go and do something grandiose like a spa day or a getaway vacation but I have learned that self-care is allowing yourself to get that chocolate chip cookie you ’ ve been eyeing or even just sitting in the car for 5 minutes before heading into the house.

On the daily. I jam to music on my way to work and listen to my favorite song that is going to help pump me up for my day. Selfcare is also closing the door to my office for a few minutes to sit in silence as I mentally take care of myself for my next client.

CAFB's Self Care Alphabet CAFB's Self Care Alphabet

Adventures Bubble bath

Coloring my hair

Exercise

Fishing

Hobby time

Jogging

Dinner & nice wine

Gardening

Indulge

Kicking back with friends

Learing something new

Massage

Organize Pilates & Pampering

Nap

Quilting & quiet time

Relax

Scripture Unplug

Treat yourself

Violin playing Walking on the beach

Xtra time

Yoga

Zzzz's