We & Thee, Fall/Winter 2013

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Carolina Friends School

The More Things Change Sometimes,

They Really Do Change

Fall/Winter 2013

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From The Principal

The Transformative Power of Silence

By Mike Hanas, Principal

In this issue of We & Thee, I’m feeling especially appreciative of my experiences of settling in at school.

When I wrote my first contribution to We & Thee 11 years ago, I chose to focus on the ways in which my son Matt’s experiences at Campus Early School and in Sky Class seemed to be contributing to his inclinations to be deliberate in discernment. Matt is a CFS senior now (Yikes!), and I still take advantage of every chance I get to settle in whether at one of our Early Schools, with the Lower School community on Monday mornings, and/or with the Middle School at least once per week. As often as possible, I also join the Upper School staff and students as they settle into silence for their weekly Meeting for Worship on Wednesday afternoons.

Before my arrival at CFS, I’d never thought of silence as a source of power.

Truth be told, 14 years into my membership in the CFS community, three as Upper School Head Teacher and 11 as Principal, I still struggle to make good use of silence. I rarely feel “centered,” even when I’ve “settled in.”

But I am convinced now that our efforts to create conditions wherein students and teachers make deliberate use of silence can become a source of profound power, a superpower we don’t have to merely pretend we have.

The superpower I’m thinking of that our use of silence contributes to is attention, the ability to focus our energy on a matter of importance immediately in front of us. Has it ever been more difficult to do so?

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The alternatives are many in number and form, including our mobile phones and the access they provide to our email, our Facebook accounts, our Twitter feeds, etc. Why wouldn’t we opt for these “feeds,” especially instead of facing a difficult task or conversation or source of sadness?

Cal Newport, Georgetown professor and expert on expertise, thinks the ability to stay focused will be the superpower of the 21st century.

He argues in favor of employing the mindset of a craftsman, one who finds satisfaction in the development of a skill, in the habits of deliberate practice.

Newport suggests that the real craftsmen out there are not the guys checking their social media feeds every five minutes. They’re not looking for the easy win or the flowstate. They’re the guys that are out there three hours, pushing the skill.

“This is hard but I’m going to master this new piece of software. I’m going to master this new mathematical framework.”

That’s the mindset, the habit of the craftsman. I think the deliberate practice of being quiet, listening for that still small voice within, listening to others in ways that engender empathy and understanding, and opening our hearts and minds to what matters most will serve well our students and our selves.

So, next chance you get, please join me. Let’s each take a deep breath and then exhale.

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Things Are Changing @ Carolina Friends School

And, Yes, Virginia, It’s a Good Thing As is the case with every issue of We & Thee, much of what you’ll find in the pages that follow is a chronicle of changes that have been taking place at Carolina Friends School.

Some of the changes are historic and visible—like the new heads of the Upper School and the Middle School, and the expansion of the Middle School that is going up right before our eyes.

Some of the changes are less visible, but still significant—like the new wastewater treatment facility that is literally going down, in woods across the creek—and efforts in the Center to make sure the school has the policies and procedures needed to thrive as a learning institution going forward.

With so much change going on, some may be led to recall a quote that has been attributed to Mark Twain: “I’m all in favor of progress...it’s change that I don’t like.”

In some ways, CFS has always embodied change. The departure from the status quo of racially segregated Southern

schools in the early 1960s. The evolution from a single kindergarten class at the Durham Friends Meeting to a learning community of three Early schools all the way through Upper School on three separate campuses. The addition of an interscholastic athletic program in the 1990s.

Yet, we strive always to build upon the bedrock—the Quaker values and the expansive vision of our earliest days. A tri-fold brochure advertising CFS when it went only through the 2nd grade puts it well: It is the goal of the school to open children's minds and hearts to the exciting world of different ideas, beauty, and accomplishment, to prepare them for a satisfying life in our quickly changing society, to help them develop their own unique and special abilities and promise for the future, and to teach them how to see in the differences in nationality, color, religion, and past experiences that exist among people the discovery of the value and worth of each human being.

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Congratulations, Class of 2013!

The Members of the CFS Class of 2013 On Sunday, June 10, Carolina Friends School gathered in the gym for a Meeting for Worship with Attention to Graduation, focused on the 41 students in the Class of 2013. Our grads processed into the gym through a double line of applauding staff members from all units of the School; and sincere thanks were extended to trustees, staff members, and parents for all they have done on behalf of these students and the School. After the Meeting for Worship, during which many meaningful messages were shared with the group, each student received a diploma and a hug from Principal Mike Hanas and Upper School Head Teacher Carrie Huff. Then the graduates received a standing ovation, and hugs were exchanged all ‘round.

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Hannah Reid Bittle Halena Jean Searles Bohs Erin Elizabeth Boyle Davi Nydick Cheshire Caleb Maximillian Cole Isaac Dugan Dalsheimer Audrey Elizabeth Magnuson Dinyari Darius Donte Emerson Esten Lewis Steflik Fabec Rhiannon Sophia Faith Rosemary Valentine Gould Clara Eleanor Hazlett-Norman MacLean Tobias Holt Olivia Rinzelani Howes Emma Lin Hoyle Coleman Lynn Ikenberry Tyler Elliot Keel Milo Kim Mayer Nicholas Torquil MacLeod Celeste Li McGilvary Danilo Joel Meyer-Arrivillaga

Asante Amir Monadjemi Charles Hancock Moore Mikaela Kathryn Moracco-Schelp Emma Rollins Paul Daniel James Peraza-Rudesill Adam Jackson Prah Sydney Grace Ray James Theodore Richmond Nicholas Benjamin Shear Maxton Alexander Sockwell Hanna Ann Stoner Calvin Mackenzie Trisolini Maria-Betania Villalba Mark Daniel Wasilewski Jolene Elizabeth Wells Jenna Renee White Crispin Cone Whittier Hannah Michaela Wolf Lydia Anna Scholl Youngblood Tongyu Zhang

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Where in the World are Our 2013 Grads Heading?

Carleton College (2) College of Wooster Colorado College Earlham College Guilford College (4) Haverford College (2) Johnson and Wales University

Juniata College Oberlin College Occidental College Savannah College of Art and Design Southern California Institute of Architecture University of Minnesota-Twin Cities

UNC-Asheville (3) UNC-Chapel Hill (8) UNC-Charlotte UNC-Greensboro (4) Wake Forest University Warren Wilson College (2)

2013 graduates have been offered more than $1,780,000 in merit scholarships, in addition to the Morehead-Cain scholarship at UNC-CH that is valued at $80,000 - $100,000.

Other Colleges Offering Admission to Members of the Class of 2013 Allegheny College Appalachian State University Bard College Barnard College Clemson University College of Charleston Connecticut College Dickinson College Eckerd College Elon University Emory and Henry College

George Washington University Grinnell College Hampshire College Hendrix College LIM College Macalester College Middlebury College North Carolina State University Rhodes College Skidmore College Smith College

Towson University University of Cincinnati University of Denver University of Vermont University of Virginia University of Washington Vassar College Washington and Lee University Whitman College

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An Interview with Morehead-Cain Scholar Nick MacLeod ’13 I didn’t encounter many opportunities to befriend adults, and knowing that I’m able to talk to and get to know someone much older than me is a lesson that I’m sure will only prove more and more useful.

What CFS experiences stand out?

When were you at CFS?

I came to CFS in the fall of 2005, as a first year in Middle School, and stayed until the spring of 2013, when I graduated.

Who were your favorite teachers?

Though CFS has no shortage of great teachers and interesting classes, I found that my teachers excelled in an environment outside the classroom: the advisee groups.

Throughout my eight years at CFS, I had two advisors (Matthew Ross in Middle School and Elise London in Upper School), who were beyond helpful. The Middle and Upper School years are very formative. Having an adult other than my parents who was willing to talk to me and give me advice, but at the same time hold me to high expectations and sit me down when I messed up was invaluable.

These relationships helped me learn a lot about myself, and they also taught me one other surprising lesson: having friendship with an adult is not only possible, but it can alsoprove to be very meaningful. Outside of CFS,

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I think that the End-of-Year Program is one of the best things we do, and some of my best CFS experiences come directly from those trips. I had the opportunity to travel to Newton Grove, Trinidad, and the Galapagos.

Each trip was powerful in its own way, but there are lessons that extend across all three.

To name a few: I’ve learned that a pick-up soccer game is unrivaled when it comes to forming bonds with strangers, even when you cannot understand each other; every other culture has better food than ours; no gift is better than receiving a heartfelt thank you; and, the only surefire recipe for a good night’s sleep is a hard day of service.

What’s your favorite spot on campus?

Two spots will always be special for me. The first is the soccer field. I think our field, with the trees that surround it, is one of the most picturesque around. My CFS soccer teams were by far the closest teams I have ever played on, and getting to play great soccer alongside my close friends and my brother is something I will never be able to replicate.

The second location is Elise’s office.

Besides its being home to my advisee group for four years, it was where I spent almost every single lunch over those four years. I could never explain why my friends and I chose that room; it’s not meant to fit more

than 10 people, but we consistently crammed more inside it. That office has some intangible quality that makes it great for conversation.

Can you describe CFS in 30 seconds?

I would describe it in three words: individuality, reflection, and community.

From bare feet to the first-name basis and the elimination of grades and class ranking, CFS isn’t about doing what is traditional, it’s about doing what feels right for you.

With settling in and meeting for worship, it’s clear that students are given time to reflect upon themselves, but reflection doesn’t stop there. The staff are always open to hearing feedback to see if what we do still aligns with the School’s mission, leading to a learning environment that is dynamic and progressive.

At CFS everyone is considered an equal member of the community. Whether deciding who to hire as a new teacher, what is an appropriate consequence for a student who has broken the School’s trust, or developing a long-term plan, students sit alongside staff and board members and play an important role in making decisions, which serves to strengthen the community as a whole.

Tell us about moving through the Morehead-Cain selection process.

When I began my senior year, I had no idea that the Morehead-Cain Scholarship existed.

My college counselor, Elise London, told me that CFS wanted to nominate me, so I got to work on the application in order to have it in by the early October deadline. This all happened quickly, and even by the time of my submission, I didn’t fully understand what the scholarship entailed. The one thing I did know

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was that it was very competitive, so I tried to keep myself from getting my hopes up. But when I learned that I had made it to the semifinals, I realized that the scholarship was no longer a pipe-dream; I had a real shot at it.

From the semi-finals on, the application process becomes centered around interviews, something I didn’t have much experience with. To help me prepare, Elise set up practice interviews with a wide range of people from the CFS community, including Mike Hanas, Anthony L. Clay, UNC professors, and parents of students and alums. Getting the chance to practice a few interviews was immensely helpful; each group I met with was unique, and had its own interview style and types of questions. At the end of a practice interview, each group would walk me through our conversation and highlight what I haddone well and what I should work to improve.

When I walked through the doors of the Morehead-Cain Foundation on the day of my semi-final interviews, I was one of the most prepared applicants in the room. I talked to other of the semi-finalists, and many told me that they hadn’t gotten the opportunity to conduct any practice interviews; instead they had been left on their own. It was humbling to know that the entire CFS community was behind me, with people I had never met willing to sacrifice their time to help me prepare.

After making it to the final round, I was invited to UNC’s campus for Finals Weekend, which consists of staying in a hotel with the other finalists, attending events, learning more about the scholarship, exploring UNC’s campus, and moving through another set of interviews. The weekend turned out to be a strange mix of nerves and fun. The events were interesting and exciting, we ate well, and we got to hear some great stories from current scholars; but the entire time I was thinking about my interviews. Hearing how great the scholarship is all weekend led me to want it even more, and knowing that receiving the scholarship depended on the interviews coming up left me feeling increasingly nervous. Though I had butterflies in my stomach when I first walked in, as I began talking I settled into my rhythm and ended up having a great conversation with my interviewers, and when I left I felt that I had done as well as I could have hoped.

Tell us about your Morehead-Cain summer experience.

This summer I went on a NOLS Sea Kayaking course in Southeast Alaska. When choosing a course, I tried to pick something as far outside my comfort zone as possible, and since I had never visited Alaska nor spent an extended amount of time on the ocean, let alone sea kayak for a month, it seemed like the best choice. Southeast Alaska is beautiful. In ancient times, the area used to be a mountain range, but since then has slowly shifted lower, leaving tree-covered mountains that emerge directly from the ocean and end in snowcapped peaks. Though the landscape was incredible, it paled in comparison with the wildlife.

As we paddled further and further from civilization, we began to see more and more animals, including sea otters, river otters, bald eagles, golden eagles, porpoises, puffins, jellyfish, minks, sea lions, seals, killer whales, humpback whales, and on one occasion a black bear. Sea kayaking is by no means a fast way of traveling, but it more than makes up for its slow speed with its nonthreatening appearance to animals. On more than one occasion we had animals swim within a few feet of us to check us out, and my personal favorite was having massive humpback whales breach right beside us. Even though they had no interest in harming us, nothing can help you realize just how small and vulnerable humans are than sitting in a kayak right beside a whale or a few sea lions. Along the way, we cooked for ourselves, using simple ingredients like flour, sugar, spices, pasta, and cheese to make everything from mac and cheese to pizza or cinnamon rolls. At one point, we set up a fishing rod in the cove where we were sleeping, and, in the morning, we woke up to a 100-pound halibut on the line. When we were done fileting the fish, there were over 80 pounds to eat. Over the next few days, everyone consumed a large portion of fish with every meal, and though some people grew a little tired of halibut, we managed to finish every bite.

Until that trip, if you had asked me if I was a mountains person or a beach person I would have told you mountains without hesitation, but now it would be a toss-up. Though I’m

still not a fan of the beach, especially the sand, Alaska opened my eyes to the world just beyond the shore, and I’m now intrigued by the ocean and everything that resides within it.

How did the Morehead-Cain shape your first semester?

One of my favorite parts about the Morehead is how separate it is from my life at Carolina. I am expected to keep a certain G.P.A, but beyond that I’m just like every other student at UNC. The Foundation does bring alumni from various fields back to campus to host certain events and conduct speeches, but none of it is mandatory. The biggest advantage the scholarship offers me while at school doesn’t come from the Foundation, but rather from the other scholars. There are Moreheads involved in all sorts of organizations across campus, and all of them are willing to talk to or help out any other scholar who wishes to join. Though right now I’m still trying to adjust to life at Carolina and trying to figure out what interests me, I know that should I want to learn more about a certain topic or cause there is someone who will answer all my questions.

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In the Footsteps of Ten CFS staff members. Nineteen members of the Chapel Hill Friends Meeting (CHFM) and the Durham Friends Meeting (DFM)—many of whom are CFS alumni parents, current or former trustees, or otherwise connected to the School. Together, they spent a week last August retracing the 1652 travels of George Fox, founder of Quakerism, in the Lake District of northern England.

The trip organizers and leaders—staff members Cesanne Berry (DES), Charlie Layman (LS), and Natasha Shannon (LS)—were veterans of similar pilgrimages facilitated by the Friends Council on Education (FCE) and the Philadelphia Yearly Meeting (PYM). They had the help of two alumni parents, former CFS Board clerk Lynn Drake (CHFM) and current CFS trustee Nikki Vangsnes (DFM).

The Planning Committee envisioned this journey to historical Quaker sites and meeting houses in England as a spiritually nurturing experience for each person and an opportunity to deepen the relationships among the School and our local Meetings (members of

…many teas and biscuits (were) offered to each pilgrimage participant. … to be served and take delight in the receiving was a constant experience throughout the pilgrimage.

To help these volunteers distribute the tea and sweet treats, a few pilgrims found this a privilege as well. In their daily lives the people on this pilgrimage give so much of themselves through service to the world. It is also a special opportunity to let others give to you… knowing the pleasantness of both kinds of tender exchanges.

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whom helped found CFS some 50 years ago).

Deborra Sines Pancoe, FCE staff member and co-leader of the PYM pilgrimage, highlighted for us some of the reasons for such a pilgrimage, including: the renewal and energy that comes from seeking a deeper understanding of 17th century Friends and the experience of following in the footsteps of George Fox. Also, connecting, in person, with British Quakers provides a sense of the wider world of the Society of Friends. Visiting historic meetinghouses, Swarthmoor Hall (the home of Margaret Fell), and Lancaster Castle/Prison as well as climbing Pendle Hill provides a tangible sense of the commitment and perseverance of the “harmless and innocent people of God - called Quakers.”

The itinerary included stops at sites well-known in Friends history, including the Sawley, Brigflatts, Kendal, Lancaster, and Colthouse Meetinghouses; Pendle Hill; Firbank Fell and Fox’s Pulpit; Lancaster Castle/Prison; Swarthmoor Hall; and the Kendal Quaker tapestry.

George Fox In addition to the three trip leaders, these staff members made the journey:

Anthony L. Clay Barbara Conger (also CHFM) Matt Drake (retired; also CHFM) Jamie Hysjulien (also DFM) Lisa Joyner Kathy Krahenbuhl Connie Toverud (retired) Randall Williams

From the Chapel Hill Friends Meeting: Catherine Alguire Emile Condon Jimmy Condon Peter Condon Lynn Drake Jennifer Leeman Pat Mann Tom Munk Wendy Richesin Pam Schwingl

From the Durham Friends Meeting: Ann Allen Timothy Allen Mary Cleary John March Margaret March Bob Passmore Carol Passmore Nikki Vangsnes

When our lives become full of busy-ness, even of the Quaker kind, it can be hard to remember we have the capability to be open, vulnerable and centered on the Divine, as you all were last week. But it's important to retain the memory that we have been thus, and therefore know that we can be again—and then bring that into every situation we can turn into one of worship. When we do that, we turn the world upside down every bit as much as early Friends did. Thank you for giving me the depth of your worship and care, and your tenderness with me. William Penn wrote that Friends who cross the sea ‘live in one another still’—and so it is, and will be, of you all, with me.

In loving friendship, Roy (Roy Stephenson is the British Quaker who served as the pilgrimage tour guide)

Planning is underway for another Quaker pilgrimage to England, July 19-26, 2015, with registration beginning in a few months.

If you'd like information as it becomes available, please email aclay@cfsnc.org.

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Reflection on my CFS PACE Grant Travel

For Every Thing That

By Jamie Hysjulien, Upper School Humanities Teacher

Jamie received one of the School’s two 2013 PACE [Professional And Community Enrichment] grants to travel on a journey of “intellectual and spiritual renewal” to animate his work in Humanities curriculum development and End-of-Year Service Learning on a global scale. In the next issue of We & Thee, please look for a dispatch from Director of Summer Programs Chris Firpo, who’s traveling to Costa Rica on her PACE Grant.

I have always been fascinated by the Mediterranean World and the civilizations that grew up around its edges. As a child, I would turn the pages of my family’s encyclopedia until they were worn, looking at drawings that re-imagined and recreated this past.

In college, I studied Classical Greek, believing that dead languages and past cultures were still an essential part of who we are today.

The world I explored last summer as I traveled on a PACE Grant across North Africa into Jerusalem and from Turkey to Greece was not the dusty and innocent land of my imagination. It was living, vital, and diverse. The diversity was not just from one place to the next, but I found that each city offered various windows into our moment in history. Certainly it offered windows into my

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own self and my travels. As a Quaker, I have a profound belief that every person, every place, and every time is equally sacred. Still I saw tourists, like myself, laying claim to social, historical, and natural beauties while abandoning whatever did not interest them.

I was suspicious of my own intentions.

Walking through the narrow, medieval streets of Fez, for example, I wondered why I was taking certain pictures—what was I looking for or hoping to see? What did I have to give anyone in return for what I was trying to take? The unstated question in the eyes of those whom I encountered was: We are showing you our lives, but what do you have to show us? In the midst of this complexity, even an act as simple as buying a belt in the artisan market turned into a couple hours of conversation and tea, which ended

in being led to the shop of a friend. Those places I traveled were overcrowded, driven by the good and bad aspects of globalization, and eaten away, at every level, by an uncontrolled consumerism. People wanted more, but were fearful about losing what was most meaningful. They are caught between a past that is disappearing and a future that seems empty and unsustainable. Not surprisingly, this confluence of forces is often violent. As I sat in a tea house in Marrakesh watching bodies in blood-soaked sheets being laid out on to the street, I realized I would not be going to Cairo. Despite the violence, I found everywhere people have an unshakable desire, both personally and collectively, to touch some common humanity While I was staying in Jerusalem, I took the local bus one Sunday up to Ramallah to

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Lives is Holy

attend the small Quaker Meeting there.

After meeting for worship, I went with Jean Zaru, the clerk of Ramallah Friends Meeting, back to her house for lunch. We spent the afternoon in the courtyard of her simple, Scandinavian-style house, in a middle-class neighborhood not far from downtown. We ate falafels from her favorite shop and olives from her tree. She had met my wife Nikki, and was a friend of my wife’s aunt, so we talked about family, about children and grandchildren. We shared our skepticism about the peace talks that were in the works since I arrived. She told me about the Israeli occupation, especially its effect on her daily life—her ability to travel and the regular interruptions to the supply of water.

Throughout the conversation she held out a radiant, but weathered, acceptance of the

power of peace to transform the world. As a life-long resident of Palestine, now in her seventies, she is not naïve. She is a clear-eyed witness to the potential of love to untie even the most intractable knot.

As a teacher, I try to live out in my daily work the mission of the School. I especially believe in the part of the mission that asks us to “to teach our children it is possible to change the world.” In my mind, this is not a grandiose expectation that asks every student to “save the world.” It invites them to share their gifts with positivity and optimism. It calls them to accept not only the world before them—a world of holiness, urgency, and wonder—but also the world beneath the visible world that is ready to emerge.

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A Welcome to

A Reverence for Learning and Profile of Tom Anderson, new head of the Upper School

By Marsha Green, CFS Board of Trustees Clerk

Tom Anderson, their new Head Teacher, felt a quiver of nervousness as he stood in front of the CFS Upper School students the first day of school. He knew that the impression he gave in the first 15 seconds could define him in the minds of the 120 or so students squeezed into the Upper School Meeting Hall.

So he named his nervousness.

“Do me a favor and cut me some slack,” he asked the class. “This is my first time in front of you.”

From that moment on, Tom says, he felt that the students were hearing him as he intended to be heard—as someone willing to accompany them on the roller coaster journey of high school.

“I invited them into a conversation about what it means to grow up, and a lot of them responded, then and later,” Tom says. “It has been a wonderful conversation to build on.”

This is Tom’s first position in a Quaker school, but his connection to Quakers and Quaker educational philosophy has been growing for many years.

“My college professor once told me I sounded like a Quaker when I talked about religion,” he says. Tom has a B.A. in History

and Political Science from Butler University and an M.A. in History from The College of William and Mary.

Shortly after moving to Charlotte in 2002 to teach history at Charlotte Country Day School, he began attending the Charlotte Friends Meeting with his soon-to-be wife, Michelle, a life-long Quaker and alumna of Wilmington Friends School. In 2007, Michelle became the founding teacher at Charlotte Friends School, remaining on staff until 2010.

“We both recognized that education is an intellectual process that has a spiritual element that is hard to engage in if a school doesn’t have the language or culture to support it,” Tom said. “We dreamed of teaching together in a Quaker school where there is a real reverence for learning.”

When the Upper School head position at CFS opened up, it looked perfect, Tom said.

“I've never wanted to give up teaching, but after nine years as chair of the Department of History I was finding myself drawn to school leadership opportunities, and the attraction of Friends education was only getting stronger for me.”

The icing on the cake came when Michelle

was selected as an extended-hours teacher at the Durham Early School, allowing her to spend portions of the day with their twoyear-old son Sammy while staying involved in Quaker education.

Principal Mike Hanas says Tom has quickly shown his mettle as both a learner and a leader. “He listens very closely, seeks out and considers a wide range of views, and then does his homework in formulating an action to advance the mission of CFS in the Upper School,” Mike says. “He has a wonderful way of asking more of people in a way that makes them want to respond.”

When not at school, Tom spends time with his family exploring their new home town of Hillsborough, which Tom says has the smalltown feel of Libertyville, Illinois, where he grew up. He’s also an avid runner, cooks up a mean pizza from scratch, and likes to dabble in home repair.

“Because the work of an educator is so gradual and the payoff is often not immediately visible, it is nice to come home and make a nice meal or work on the house and see that something looks better immediately,” he said.

“It gives my life a nice balance.”

Stay updated on Twitter at CarolinaFriends and on Facebook at Quaker Dome.

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A Welcome to

Magical Middle School Head and Profile of Kip Kuhn, new head of the Middle School

By Marsha Green, CFS Board of Trustees Clerk

At a recent Middle School gathering, Kip Kuhn, the new Head Teacher, held up three uneven lengths of rope. Tucking the ropes into his left hand, he began to manipulate them as he talked about the relative size of different groups at CFS and how they all work together. Finishing his brief message, he casually showed off the ropes again, letting the students see that they had been transformed into equal lengths.

He hadn’t performed the trick in 35 years.

He learned magic from his father, a public school teacher who often used sleight of hand to illustrate moral points at church or school gatherings, with Kip serving as his assistant. But as Kip entered high school, he veered toward science and his interest in magic waned.

Until this summer.

While moving from Utah to North Carolina, Kip and his wife, Kari, and sevenyear-old daughter, Mikayla, visited his home town of Fort Wayne, Indiana.

“My dad passed away four years ago and I discovered on this trip that my mother had boxed up all his magic stuff, from bags that make things disappear to floating balls and card tricks,” Kip said. “I hadn’t touched those things since middle school, and I

decided taking the boxes and rediscovering magic was a way to remember my dad.”

Kip’s re-discovery of magic illustrates what may be his most obvious talent–to approach everything with the wide-eyed curiosity of a true student.

“Kip’s curiosity is contagious,” says Principal Mike Hanas. “It’s there whether he’s sharing a magic trick he’s learned or wondering with wide eyes what a student or staff member is about to uncover.”

His curiosity and sense of adventure have taken Kip far from his roots. After graduating from Indiana University with a Bachelor of Science in Education and obtaining a Masters in Educational Administration and Supervision from Ball State University, his teaching career has taken him to Fairplay, Colorado and to Amman, Jordan (where his daughter Mikayla was born). For six years before coming to CFS, Kip taught high school science and served as co-director of academics, assistant head of school, and founding director of the new middle school at Wasatch Academy, an international boarding school in Mt. Pleasant, Utah.

But, he says, coming to CFS feels like coming home.

He was raised a Quaker (his parents

helped found the Fort Wayne Friends Meeting in the 1960s) and he and Kari have long wanted to settle in North Carolina.

More importantly, Kip senses that he has been given a precious opportunity to participate in a school whose values, mission, and educational philosophy resonate with him personally as well as professionally.

“I have been delighted to discover just how deep CFS’ commitment is to living out its values,” he said.

He has been particularly struck by the thoughtful way decision-making at the School includes a variety of people and voices, including students. “We don’t ask students rhetorical questions: we ask students questions because we value their voices,” he said.

Kip and his family are currently renting a home while they explore their new environs.

Weekends are dedicated to visiting museums, traveling to the North Carolina mountains, or exploring family-friendly locales such as the Haw River Ballroom at Saxapahaw.

“I’ve already been told that I’ve seen more of this area than many of my students,” he says. “But we want to get to know it, because we feel strongly that this is the place we are supposed to be.”

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Welcome to Our New Staff...

Extended Day teacher Michelle Anderson (DES) attended Wilmington Friends Meeting and studied at Wilmington Friends School as a child. In 2000, she received a Bachelor of Arts in Dance Pedagogy from Butler University in Indianapolis.

During her junior year she studied at the Laban Centre in London where she earned a Professional Diploma in Dance Studies. Two years of teaching conflict resolution in the Indianapolis Public Schools as an Americorps member, followed by studies at Lesley University in the Peaceable Schools Program, helped her to clarify her purpose as an educator. Michelle completed her Master of Arts in Teaching (Elementary, K-5) from Queens University (Charlotte) in 2013. She first visited CFS in 2007 to learn from the faculty in preparation for the founding of the Friends School of Charlotte.

Michelle was touched by the sense of community she witnessed among the students here. Her passions include dance, yoga, gardening, and teaching children's yoga.

Kai-Lukas Barlow (“Kai”) (Center) joins CFS as Human Resources Generalist.

A California native who recently learned he has ancestral roots in North Carolina, he earned a Bachelor of Science in Speech Communications and Social Science (Psychology/Sociology) from Portland State University (Oregon) and an M.A. in Cultural and Applied Anthropology from the California State University. Kai has worked for the East Bay Regional Park District, the Natural Resources Defense Council, and Viz Media, LLC. Kai relocated to the Triangle in spring of 2013 due to his husband Michael’s job transfer and to be closer to family in Durham and on the East Coast. He enjoys opera, movies, spending time with friends and family, walking and playing with his enormous 160 lb. dog Rufus, volunteering for numerous social justice causes, and exploring the beauty and hidden treasures of the Piedmont and the Carolinas.

Stephanie Bradley (DES) grew up outside of Boston, in the town of Weston. She attended Kimball Union Academy, in Meriden, New Hampshire, and went on to receive her B.A. from Washington College. After teaching in Connecticut for two years, she decided to further her career in education and attended Bank Street School of Education in New York City where she received her Masters of Science in Early Childhood Education. At Bank Street, Stephanie compiled a portfolio of her teaching experiences on the importance of creating a community of connected learners. She is passionately committed to continuously making children’s educational experiences meaningful each day. She recently relocated to the area from New York City.

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Stephanie has six years of experience teaching at the elementary school level in both public and private schools. She is excited to be applying these experiences to her teaching at DES! Cyrise Davis (AfterHours) holds a B.A. in Art Education from North Carolina Central University and a B.S. in Commercial Art and Photography from Alamance Community College. In addition to her freelance photography, she’s worked as an art and photography teacher at The Hawbridge School in Saxapahaw, a site coordinator and lead teacher for a middle school afterhours program, a YMCA summer camp counselor, and a display ad designer for the News and Observer. Cyrise is excited to employ her child-centered style of teaching (and passion for art) to help CFS Lower and Middle Schoolers learn, explore, and create in our AfterHours program.

Spanish teacher Erica Davis (MS) is tremendously excited to join the faculty at CFS and comes to us with nine years of teaching experience. After teaching ESL in Japan and South Korea for three years, she moved to Carrboro/Chapel Hill, where she has been teaching elementary and middle school Spanish for the last six years. Originally from Seattle, she completed her B.A. in Comparative Religion at the University of Puget Sound in Tacoma, WA in 2003 and her M.A. in Teaching Spanish (K-12) at UNC-Chapel Hill in 2010. Erica also teaches Nonviolent and Compassionate Communication, is a certified yoga teacher, and loves and has taught dance. She also enjoys traveling and playing soccer whenever possible.

Asiya Gusa, Ph.D. (US), is teaching Advanced Biology, Chemistry and Introduction to Physical Science. She is a microbiologist by training, having majored in Microbiology as an undergraduate at Miami University in Oxford, Ohio before obtaining a doctorate degree in Microbiology and Molecular Genetics from Emory University (Atlanta, Georgia) in 2006.

With research training at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention as well as Merck Pharmaceuticals, Asiya’s research interests include bacterial gene regulation, antibiotic resistance, and public health issues. She is a published author in several scientific journals and brings her passion for science research and mentoring to the classroom and the laboratory. She has previously taught chemistry and biology classes at Emory University and Spelman College in Georgia and, most recently, Durham Academy in North Carolina.

Language arts teacher Kathy Lucente (MS) grew up in the Washington D.C. area. She earned her B.S. in Elementary Education at Lesley University and did graduate work in liberal arts and counseling. Kathy is certified in Elementary Education and Middle School Social Studies. She has taught for 21 years in public and private schools in New York City, San Diego, Annapolis, and Chapel Hill.

She loves to read, hike, kayak, and explore the arts.

She has two daughters, both college students majoring in music.

Bradley McDevitt (US) is the guest teacher of Drama and Theater. After graduating with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Performance and Cultural Studies from The Evergreen State College in 1996, he was immediately offered a position with the award-winning UMO Ensemble, spending the next 10 years traveling, performing, and teaching their unique physical theater style to young people, collegiate residencies, and professional workshops around the world. He also served as UMO's Educational Director, guiding the company to become the most requested in-school arts residency in Washington state. Bradley has provided production management for Seattle's groundbreaking INTIMAN Theater, and has worked with such luminous performers as John Michael-Higgins, Simone Forti, Blue Man Group, Donald Byrd, & Pickle Family Circus founder and personal mentor, Larry Pisoni. A CFS alum ('89), Bradley is the proud father of two young ladies, Tallulah Cadence and Harper Evangeline. He is a working artist and continues teaching adult and professional classes.

Gayle Rush (CES) holds a degree in Child Development from the University of Illinois.

Most recently, she served as the Lower School Learning Specialist and Coordinator for the junior kindergarten through second grade classes at The Jefferson School in Georgetown, Delaware. Gayle has taught for over 30 years in a variety of early childhood settings, including High Scope programs in the Northern Virginia and Maryland area. She taught kindergarten at Sandy Spring Friends School and also served as the Head of the Early Childhood program at Northern Virginia Friends School.

Gayle has served as a Child Development Specialist-Consultant for Early Childhood Curriculum and was an instructor for Early Childhood and Developmentally Appropriate Programs, Family and Workplace Connection for the State of Delaware. Gayle also served as a Child Development Specialist at Mother Teresa's Orphanage in Calcutta, India. She is a Quaker and a member of Langley Hill Friends Meeting.

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And New Trustees Administrative assistant Amy Smoker (MS) graduated from New College in Sarasota, Florida, with a B.A. in social sciences, and later received an M.S.W. from UNC-CH. After having lived up and down the East Coast, she and her husband Randall settled in North Carolina in 1991. She has worked as a bookstore manager, sold plants in a nursery, and facilitated family groups through county social service agencies. Amy's two children attend CFS and she is an active volunteer with the Afghan Sister Schools Partnership at CFS. She enjoys making wheel-thrown pottery, Ultimate Frisbee, backpacking and hanging out with her family playing games.

Spanish teacher Caitlin Wells (MS) holds a B.A. in Latin American Studies from Macalester College and has been teaching for 10 years–theater, ESL, Portuguese, and Spanish from Maine to Minnesota, and most recently at CHICLE Language Institute in Carrboro. After living in Brazil and Spain, she speaks Portuguese and Spanish fluently. Caitlin is also an actor and designer with Little Green Pig Theatrical Concern in Durham.

Where in the world is Jim Henderson?

Jim, who retired this past June after three decades at CFS, and wife Jan are traveling the globe this year.

They’ve already made stops in Hawaii, Japan, Korea, Australia, and Bali. She’s taking HUG Your Baby (her expectant and new parent support program) to nursing schools; parenting institutes; international conferences; lactation, childbirth, and doula organizations; and hospitals. Jim is meeting with international schools and producers about Ariel’s Way, his adaptation of Shakespeare's The Tempest (which premiered as a student production at CFS in 2005 and was performed again as an alumni theatre project in 2010) and supporting Jan’s work, especially with fathers. In each country, they’re writing a lullaby using indigenous musical motifs and inspiration from their own experiences.

You can follow all of their adventures at http://tedderhenderson.blogspot.com.

Bill Jenkins, 2016, is CEO of Community Health Analytics.

Previously, he worked at the UNC Institute of AfricanAmerican Research and taught at Morehouse College and the Morehouse School of Medicine.

He’d served for two decades as Supervisory Epidemiologist in the National Center for HIV, STD, and TB Prevention (NCHSTP) at the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and managed its Minority Health Activities Program. Bill also managed the Participant Health Benefits Program, which assures medical services to the survivors of the Tuskegee Study of Untreated Syphilis in the Negro Male. He has been instrumental in founding the Institute for African American Health, the Public Health Sciences Institute at Morehouse College, the Master of Public Health program at Morehouse College (the first such program at a historically black institution), and the Society for Analysis of African American Public Health Issues.

Bill obtained his B.A. in Mathematics from Morehouse College. He holds a Master's degree in Biostatistics from Georgetown University and both a Master in Public Health degree and a Ph.D. in Epidemiology from UNC-Chapel Hill (which honored him with a 2004 Distinguished Alumni Award). He has also completed Biostatistics postdoctoral work at Harvard University’s School of Public Health. Bill was an active member of the Friends Meeting of Atlanta and a Board chair for the Friends School of Atlanta.

Chris Ringwalt, 2016, has longstanding ties with Carolina Friends School. His mother, Mildred Ringwalt, was one of the School's co-founders; his son Stuart attended CFS Early, Middle, and Upper School; and he has served previously on the CFS Board. Chris currently works as an injury prevention researcher both at UNC and the Pacific Institute for Research and Evaluation.

Mark Kuhn, 2016, is a parent of two CFS alums, Elena ’99 and Eric ’01, as well as grandparent of Alula (DES). He is an investment advisor and serves on the CFS Business Committee, Investment Committee, and Campaign Steering Committee, as well as the Head Review Committee. Mark also serves on the boards of the Friends Council on Education, the Brady Education Foundation, Student U, and the Triangle Community Foundation.

Bill Velto, 2016, is a newcomer to Durham Friends Meeting, though his affiliation as a Quaker dates back to his high school days. He is a Social Science teacher and has taught high school in New York, Texas, and North Carolina. Bill likes cooking and reading impossibly dense history tomes. He is also interested in helping teachers leverage new technology to create a more dynamic classroom experience. Bill and his wife Linda have two children, Alex and Margaret.

Eric Stein, 2016, started serving on the CFS Business Committee in 2012. He is the father of Abe (senior), Eli (second year of Middle School), and Hannah Eichner’12 (a UNC sophomore) and is married to Maxine Eichner. He works at Self-Help and its affiliate Center for Responsible Lending, nonprofits dedicated to creating and protecting ownership through providing financial services and engaging in public policy advocacy. He previously worked for the Obama Treasury Department on financial reform legislation. He grew up in Chapel Hill and enjoys biking, soccer, and mysteries.

(Eric has recently had to conclude his CFS Board service because he’s accepted a position working with former North Carolina Congressman Mel Watt at the Federal Housing Finance Agency, the regulator of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. Thanks to Eric for his service and good luck to him in Washington!)

What’s up with Carrie Huff?

After 10 years as Upper School Head Teacher, Carrie Huff retired from the position last June. But she’s not done working at CFS. While she and husband Greg are spending a year in San Francisco in order to be closer to her son Dave, his wife Jeanine, and their four children (a former CFS family) and enjoying time with other family members across the country, she is continuing to co-lead the Planning Committee for CFS’ 50th Anniversary. She supported Building Friends Campaign outreach efforts by being part of November community gatherings in Los Angeles and San Francisco! And this coming fall, she’ll be returning to work at CFS, in a still to be determined role.

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Afghan Sister Schools

By David Swanson, CFS Alum Parent

As I write this on a Sunday afternoon from a small cottage on the outskirts of Eldoret, Kenya, I am certain that I would not be here were it not for the encouragement I derive from watching how the Afghan Sister Schools Partnership works.

With gratitude, I want to share with you here my sense of why this good idea took wing and how it maintains flight through all the turbulence and complexity that fill the skies about it.

In the wake of September 11th, 2001, at the outset of the war in Afghanistan, a group of CFS parents were led to show our children and the children in Afghanistan that Americans had more to offer than military strength alone. What sprang from this need was the desire to link our school community directly with a school in Afghanistan. Upon discovering that the American Friends Service Committee had a program to partner American and Afghan schools, CFS first began fundraising to improve facilities at a village school near Kabul. We soon began a letter exchange between students at our two schools, believing that developing long distance friendships could break down stereotypes and lead to deeper understanding.

A perusal of its web page (www.cfsnc.org/Afghan Sister Schools Partnership) shows how successful this partnership has been. The Afghan community with which we eventually came to build a long-term partnership is Topchi in the province of Bamiyan. When our friendship

16 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2013

began, Topchi Village School was situated in an old wastewater facility and stopped at the eighth grade. Funds raised from the CFS community, primarily through weekly pizza lunches organized by the Partnership, have helped furnish classrooms and refurbish sanitary and classroom facilities.

We have supported teacher training broadly and specifically in science, along with the provision of lab equipment. We have provided health and safety education. We have established a library at the school that serves the entire village and whose offerings we augment each year. We have begun providing computer equipment along with the necessary training of teachers and students to help Topchi make the best use of that technology. Our support, moreover, has helped Topchi garner large-scale support from international organizations, including Save the Children Japan, such that it now has 16 classrooms serving over 800 students in two shifts. Three classes comprised of both boys and girls have now graduated from the 12th grade. In honor of their tremendous achievement, we have provided graduates with certificates and gifts of cooking oil, gloves, and winter scarves.

By any set of metrics, the Partnership is a success. It can be seen to have achieved that ever-elusive goal of sustainability, with pizza lunch the central funding mechanism that provides a consistent income stream. But what truly sustains the Partnership is something that runs much deeper than metrics

can capture; something that its founders instinctively understood and everyone who chooses to lend a hand cannot help but feel.

There is an openness to the Partnership that is instantly apparent at its monthly meetings, and at all the sporadic meetings that necessity creates. There is a willingness to listen and a desire to come to an agreement on the best approach. There is deference to the fact that everyone is volunteering their time, coupled with–and this always encourages me the most–an abundance of offers to take up all parts of an agreed-upon action.

I think the reason this openness prevails is that the Partnership remains steadfast in keeping its original intent of fostering the relationships between the students of Topchi Village School and CFS its primary focus. While it is no small feat to gather and match the letters from each student with their pen pal, let alone orchestrating the translations that our current partner organization in Kabul, AFCO (Afghan Friendship and Cooperation Organization) undertakes twice a year, the joy in seeing these relationships grow drives every other aspect and venture of the Partnership. Reading what their children and our children have to share with one another across all that divides them never ceases to amaze and to inspire. I think it is precisely because of the amount of care given by its volunteers to the process of pen pal letter writing that there exists a warmth to the Partnership that is self-sustaining.

This openness allows remarkable things to

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Partnership At 10 Years

happen. It has allowed me, whose children have long since moved on from CFS, the opportunity to play an active role in the monthly committee meetings where I occasionally have some insight from having worked in Afghanistan and elsewhere in the developing world. It has guided us as we try to decipher the intentions of the Topchi community through the translated correspondences that are our primary means of communication. It has helped us build trust with the school’s principal and with our dedicated partners in Kabul as we successfully implement projects together. It also keeps us alive to how precarious it is to be a girl in school in Bamiyan, where the future is clouded with uncertainty.

This openness was, perhaps, most apparent on a Thursday evening last March when the Partnership celebrated its 10th anniversary. The Partnership chose, rather than simply trumpeting it successes, to delve into the complex landscape that surrounds the Topchi community, looking for a glimpse at what the future will bring. It brought together a diverse set of panelists, each with a different perspective on Afghanistan and the competing forces that complicate efforts at progress there. Fahima Vorgetts, founder of the Afghan Women’s Fund, who grew up in Afghanistan and now raises funds to build schools and clinics there, talked openly about her frustrations with American policy towards Afghanistan past and present.

Abdullah Antepli, the Muslim chaplain at

Duke University, spoke of the destruction of Afghanistan as being a collective failure and how painful it was for him to see, on a visit to Afghanistan several years ago, the religion he loves being distorted beyond recognition.

Via Skype, amazingly, from Kabul, Hassina Sherjan, founder of Aid Afghanistan for Education and a former refugee who has returned to open schools in her country, spoke of the challenges of sustaining the gains of recent years in an environment where funding is drying up.

Within the Upper School Meeting Hall transformed into an Afghan bazaar, lined with gorgeous carpets, clothes, and jewelry, and a beautiful and authentic Haft-Seen table set to celebrate the Persian holiday of Nowruz, the discussion was a complex and at times difficult one. Each of the panelists spoke passionately, and each elicited passionate responses and questions from the audience. Through the skillful moderating of Phillip Gary, each concluded by expressing how they remained in touch with the hope that carries them forward in their pursuits.

The formal discussion concluded with Mike Hanas emphasizing the importance our community places on sharing and leaning into all of our various opinions and passions. The richest conversations, he reminded us, derive from dealing honestly with difficult topics about which people do not necessarily agree.

The evening was, in other words, a most befitting way to celebrate these first 10 years

of the Afghan Sister Schools Partnership.

What I believe everyone took home with them that night was a sense that the need which brought the Partnership into being remains as great as it was a decade ago, and the terrain through which it walks, just as complex. We have so much to learn about how we find and maintain peace, and the genius of the Partnership is that we are learning in lockstep with our children, who will do more with this knowledge than we ever can.

With the evening approaching here, I need to close this and wade back into all the complexity of the global health initiative which has brought me here, but I must tell you that taking these few hours to remind myself of the Afghan Sister Schools Partnership, and the openness and warmth which sustains it, has been as rejuvenating as participating in one of its monthly committee meetings.

This initiative I am working on is five years in the making, and, in working through all of the politics that have encumbered it over this stretch, I am positive that I would not have found my way here were I not reminded monthly of how things can work.

So as the sun drops over the hilltops here in Kenya, I want to leave you with one last thought. If you are looking for inspiration for your own pursuits, I think it can be found by lending whatever time you have to the Afghan Sister Schools Partnership and its many pursuits. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

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Mark Your Calendars:

50 Years of Friends We are proud and happy to announce the 50th Anniversary of the Carolina Friends School, which will be celebrated during the 2014-2015 school year!

This celebration begins September 13th, 2014 (exactly 50 years from the day when school began at CFS) with a silent meeting for worship at the Durham Friends Meeting and culminates in a weekend-long extravaganza in April of 2015. FIFTY YEARS OF FRIENDS will offer a school year full of special events, alum gatherings, and historical highlights.

Be on the lookout for the unveiling of our CFS Archives, which is presently and lovingly being created by archivist Pam Mayer with the help of an Upper School class and an Archives Committee. We also look forward to the publication of an anthology of essays, short stories, poems, and songs, entitled 27 Views of CFS, with the permission of former CFS parent and Eno Publishers founder Elizabeth Woodman. In honor of our deep history of large and delicious potluck dinners, we will create an updated version of our cookbook, Dinner with Friends.

We welcome the involvement of past and present students, parents, grandparents, staff, and trustees in the planning of events for 50 YEARS OF FRIENDS. If you are interested in helping with Archives, Virtual Presence, Sports and Athletics, Community Service, Commemorative Artwork, or Special Events, please contact one of the co-conveners of the 50th Anniversary Planning Committee: Jane Anderson (janeedithanderson@gmail.com), Will Gordon (wtgordon@gmail.com), or Carrie Huff (chuff@cfsnc.org).

We also invite you to take a look at—and bookmark—our 50th Anniversary information page at www.cfsnc.org/50th for updates.

Preserving the Past

By Pam Mayer, CFS Archivist

During the 2014-2015 school year, Carolina Friends will celebrate its 50th birthday. During that half-century, according to the Fourth Long-Range Strategic Plan, CFS has evolved “from a young school with an experimental quality to an established, enduring educational institution.” Our school is now old enough to have a past! This important benchmark raises questions for us regarding the stewardship of our history. How can we responsibly preserve the materials that document the distinctiveness of our community and its origins? What resources and memorabilia are in the hands of former and current parents, staff members, and alums? What is the best way to collect and organize these historical documents? The answer was immediately clear: create the Carolina Friends School Archives.

The Purpose

5 0 Ye a r s

of Friends

Celebrating a Half Century of Learning, Community, and Service

18 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2013

Creating a CFS Archives is not about collecting old stuff; it is, rather, an opportunity to preserve items from the past that will tell the story of the School in the future. It’s a chance

to be intentional about what we save. We convey what is important to us in what we choose to preserve—instead of being left with that which merely survives. We can also be intentional in a way that shows the important facets and dimensions of the community. Left to chance, it’s possible, perhaps even likely, that smaller or temporary programs may be forgotten altogether. As the School gets older, its past will no longer reside in the living memory of community members. The archives will serve as an institutional memory. We will be able to tell the story of the evolution of CFS to future audiences by letting the records speak. However, archival material is collected and organized not only for the future, but also for today. The archives will strengthen our community in the present. Materials from the archives can be used for outreach as well as celebrations—like the 50th Anniversary!

The Process

The core of the archival collection was literally rescued from destruction by Upper School

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as We Prepare for the Future

teacher Bryce Little. When he was approached about taking on materials found in the Center Building in 2004, he agreed. Thank goodness!

He worked with a group of Upper School students during their End-of-Year experience to begin the organizing process. Later, Natalia Silva Harwood, Admission Secretary, also played a role. In the summer of 2012, the archives were folded into the planning for the 50th Anniversary of the School. This marks a new phase in the stewardship of the old materials—a commitment to preserve them in accordance with archival principles and standards.

Since August 2012, I have been working with the newly established Archives Committee. Members Bryce Little, Jim Henderson, Kathy Schenley, Libby Pittman Pendergrast, and Willy Rotella (all current or former staff members) have provided guidance in terms of policies and collection decisions as well as rolling up their sleeves and working with the archival collection. It has been a joy spending time working on the proj-

ect with them. In addition, I have spent many happy hours devising an organizational taxonomy, organizing the materials, and determining preservation and media format issues.

I am also teaching the first ever Archiving class in the Upper School. The students are introduced to archives and archival theory and learning about their school’s history through their work with the CFS photo and newspaper clipping collections.

The Collection

As an archivist, I have never met an old document or photo that I didn’t like. That’s why I’m glad we created a mission statement and selection policy. We are not adding to the archives indiscriminately. The mission statement informs our decision-making with regard to what we choose to collect and preserve: The CFS Archives seeks to promote knowledge and understanding of the origins, aims, programs, and goals of the School.

The selection policy further refines collection decisions: The CFS Archives collects

noncurrent official records created in the course of the operation of the School as well as materials that reflect the life of the School that are deemed to be of enduring value.

The materials in the CFS Archives are many and varied—school directories and handbooks, yearbooks, We & Thee magazines, Meeting for Graduation programs, student publications, photographs, and much more. I am meeting with CFS staff members about transferring archival treasures in their possession to the archives. If you think you have a unique treasure that might help to tell the CFS story, I’d love to have a conversation with you, too.

Carolina Friends is about teaching and learning. Our Archives is about teaching and learning, about CFS! We hope that our collection will help students for generations to come to learn about and from this very special endeavor that is Friends School. Preserving our past sends a message about our commitment to the future. As Mike Hanas says, “CFS is here for the long haul!”

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Elizabeth Taylor

Family, School, & Values

By John Ladd, Development Coordinator

“I made a gift in my will to keep the spirit of CFS alive” Elizabeth Taylor

In the spring, the flowering cherry and crab apple trees on campus fill me with hope for the future. To me, their beauty and growth over the years reflect how children are nurtured and blossom at CFS. The trees are a living demonstration that one person can make a difference in many lives for decades to come. Elizabeth Taylor, parent of two CFS alumni, donated some of these lovely trees. They are but one example of her legacy of caring.

On a sunny autumn morning, I sat outside with Elizabeth as we talked about CFS and its meaning to her family.

Dana and Laurel, Elizabeth’s daughters, began CFS in Early School. From the first days, she knew she had made the right choice.

“What I immediately loved about CFS was that the teachers understood and accepted my children as individuals. And that from age three, they were surrounded by people of all ages who engaged them respectfully. The multi-generational environment taught them how to get to know adults as individuals.”

She liked that CFS teachers made learning interesting and memorable.

“We talk about CFS often. Recently, Dana fairly lit up as she explained Zoo Land [in Lower School] to her fiancé. Twenty years later, she could recount in vivid detail everything about that biology assignment.”

Elizabeth noted her daughters continue to benefit from CFS. “My daughters learned how they learn best and what they need to do to succeed. The importance of honoring commitments, and

that once you make a decision you own it. CFS gave them the tools to communicate, to question, to learn, and even to have fun.”

“I see all of this reflected in how they’ve navigated situations, challenges, and relationships in college, in grad school, and at work.”

Elizabeth appreciates that the School remains true to its principles.

“I’m passionate about the arts. I’m thrilled that the arts remain strong at CFS. And that the curriculum is an integrated curriculum.

There’s still the beauty of CFS being a real community, one in which [Principal] Mike [Hanas] knows everyone’s name.”

“From the beginning, CFS was a community for our family. To this day, my best friends include parents of my daughters’ classmates.

And my daughters’ closest friendships are with those they knew at CFS. And many of their friends are now my friends.”

Elizabeth sees CFS teaching values that influence alumni’s lives for decades. “CFS is foundational; it gave my daughters their value system. They learned to find the essence, the light in each individual. They learned how to engage the world.”

“My daughters and many alumni are committed to making the world a better place. I love to imagine the huge ripple effect of so many alumni out there making differences in people’s lives and communities. Through our alumni, CFS is changing the world.”

“I made a gift in my will to keep the spirit of CFS alive. Friends School’s values are close to the core of who I am, the kind of world I envision. The gift in my will supports my hopes for

*Special thanks to alumni parent Diane Robertson, who procured the trees and supervised their planting.

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the future.”

“My daughters are the most important people in my life, and I can’t imagine them being the incredible women they are today without the love, support, and education they received at CFS.” “It feels good to give back to CFS because it’s been so instrumental in their lives. And in my life. My gift in my will gives thanks to the school that means so much to all of us.”

Like her gift of trees, Elizabeth’s gift in her will reflects her commitment to a brighter future. Both gifts will make a difference for generations yet to come: thousands of children who will blossom at CFS and, like Elizabeth, be the change they wish to see in the world.

You can, too. Please contact John Ladd.

919.383.6602 x270, jladd@cfsnc.org.

Glimpses of This Fall’s Campus Events

(Photos, left to right, and top to bottom) Back to School picnic; parent coffee; Fall Sports Day; packing care packages for the Class of 2013; and finally, two shots from Halloween.

You'll find lots more campus event photos in the web edition of We & Thee, www.cfsnc.org/Fall_Winter2013

Please mark your calendar for

FriendsFest!

Saturday April 26 Haw River Ballroom, Saxapahaw www.cfsnc.org/FriendsFest2014

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CFS Athletics:

A Look Back at 2012-13

by Alex Gordon, Athletic Director

There were many great moments in athletics at CFS this past year, including: • A top 10 finish by the boys’ cross-country team in the state meet.

• A second straight appearance by the boys’ soccer team in the state finals.

• A 3rd place finish by the girls’ tennis team in the state tournament.

• The first girls’ tennis state tournament flight winner.

• The second straight conference tournament championship for our Middle School ultimate Frisbee team.

• Regular season and tournament championships for the Middle School girls’ soccer team.

• The first ever win in the state tournament by our baseball team.

• Our first ever state championship—in any sport—in ultimate Frisbee!

Here’s a listing of 2012-2013 team and individual highlights: FALL

WINTER

SPRING

MS Boys’ Soccer All Conference: Nick T

MS Girls’ Basketball All Conference: Hadiyah O

MS Baseball All Conference:

MS Volleyball All Conference:

MS Boys’ Basketball All Conference: Alex C

MS Girls’ Soccer Regular season champions Tournament champions All Conference: Jamie B Naomi T Coco W

Naomi T

US Cross-Country 10th out of 24 schools state championship meet (boys’ team) All Conference: Anna K Dillon L Mac S US Boys’ Soccer Conference regular season champions Conference tournament champions #3 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Isaac D Knox E Esten F Nick M Dani M-A (Player of the Year) All State: Isaac D Dani M-A US Girls’ Tennis #3 finish in the state tournament All Conference: Ellie M State champion #2 doubles: Clara H-N, Lydia Y US Volleyball All Conference: Jolene W

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MS Ultimate TYUL tournament champion US Girls’ Basketball #12 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Jolene W Lydia Y (Player of the Year) All State: Lydia Y US Boys’ Basketball All Conference: Josh B

Lukas B

US Baseball #11 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Matt G-H US Girls’ Soccer Regular season conference champions #6 seed in the state tournament All Conference: Davi C Olivia H Lydia Y All State: Davi C US Boys’ Tennis #8 seed in the state tournament All Conference: David B Tate G Mark W All State: Tate G US Ultimate State champion

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CFS is a very friendly place— especially in fundraising!

by Rebecca Swartz, Annual Giving Coordinator

We have the Friends of Friends School Annual Campaign. As the name implies, we ask all CFS community members each year to support the School’s ongoing operational needs. This helps us close the difference between the cost of tuition paid by families and the actual cost of educating each student—a difference of $2,712 per student, of which $740 is covered by the annual fund.

We have the Building Friends Capital Campaign. This special fundraising effort, for a defined period of time, allows us to do

the big things and realize big dreams that we couldn’t do otherwise because we don’t have the tuition revenue or yearly fundraising to make them possible.

And, we have Visionary Friends, individuals who include CFS in their retirement plans or in their will, legacy gifts truly of any size that down the road make the School an even stronger place. These three friends— through the generosity of our community— are working together for the benefit of CFS students, now and in the future.

Did you know?

Annual fund gifts can be made anytime (and you can be a SUSTAINER by setting up a gift that reoccurs monthly) via our website: www.cfsnc.org/donate.

Annual fund appeal letters are mailed in late November followed by phonathon calls in the Spring.

Questions or comments?

Contact Rebecca Swartz at 919.383.6602 x228 or email rswartz@cfsnc.org.

Want to save a tree?

Every issue of We &Thee is available online at www.cfsnc.org.

If you would like to stop your paper copy and have a PDF emailed to you, please email: lshmania@cfsnc.org.

We & Thee is published twice a year by

Carolina Friends School 4809 Friends School Road Durham, NC 27705

Mike Hanas, Principal Anthony L. Clay, Editor Kathleen Davidson, Associate Editor Doug Johnston, Designer Laura Shmania, Staff Photographer

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We & Thee Web Edition Bonus

Additional Images of First, We Held a Meeting for Graduation 2013

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Events At CFS

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26 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2013

Then Came The Fall:

Assistant Principal for Teaching and Learning Renee Prillaman talks with parents at the Back-to-School picnic

Lisa Joyner poses with students at the MS retreat

Staffer, alum, and alum parent Robert Bittle at the Middle School retreat

Students at the MS retreat

Dedicated CFS sports fan (and US teacher) Dave Worden enjoys soccer at Fall Sports Day

Students and parents at Fall Sports Day

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9.28.13 a large contingent of CFS community members marched in the North Carolina Pride parade in Durham (Ida Trisolini photo)

9.28.13 a large contingent of CFS community members marched in the North Carolina Pride parade in Durham

9.28.13 MS Ecochicos at Climate Change march in Raleigh

10.28.13 Gayle Rush (CES) and Lillemor Ross participate in the new staff retreat at the Durham Friends Meetinghouse

Principal Mike Hanas, Assist Principal Renee Prillaman, US head Tom Anderson, MS head Kip Kuhn, & Dir of Adv Anthony L. Clay join Friends Council on Education Executive Director Irene McHenry & other educators at a Q-1 Conference

Former Upper School head Carrie Huff and her father and stepmother (recognizable to many from their decades as stars of “Days of Our Lives�) at CFS Community event in Los Angeles

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Susanne Friedrich and Eric Garner '80 visit at a CFS community gathering in Los Angeles

Pete Kiehart '04 talks with Principal Mike Hanas at the San Francisco gathering of CFS community members

School co-founder and Build Friends Campaign co-chair Martha Klopfer visits with Rebecca Laszlo '80 and her partner Sara Intriligator in Seattle

Director of Advancement Anthony L. Clay poses with a group of Chinese school principals who toured CFS

Middle Schoolers participants in the NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) pose

Middle Schoolers participating in the Battle of the Books pose with their books

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A Lower Schooler works on her gingerbread house

Ben Harris '09 took part in the 2nd annual Alum-Student Ultimate Frisbee game

Hannah Strom '09, Jason Hopkins Parker '05, and Nick MacLeod '13 head off the field at the 2nd annual Alum-Student Ultimate Frisbee game

Students and a parent at Lower School Night at the Gym, our Winter Sports Night

Middle Schoolers show off their period attire on '60s dress day

Campus Early Schoolers work on letters to civil rights activist Bob Zellner, our Martin Luther King, Jr. celebration keynote speaker

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Shan Cretin, General Secretary of the Nobel Peace Prize-winning American Friends Service Committee speaks to CFS community members and members of the Chapel Hill & Durham Friends Meetings

Longtime teacher Henry Walker visits with retired colleagues Hattie Scott Warner (Middle School head), Shirley Block (Lower School head), and Peggy Manring (our first visual arts teacher) before a Middle School performance of “Oliver�

Retired LS head Shirley Block, retired MS head Hattie Scott Warner, MS teacher Leon Ikenberry (whose 1st yr as a teacher was Hattie's last), School co-founder Martha Klopfer, & Hattie's newest succesor Kip Kuhn

And Then Came The Winter Dance

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34 We&Thee/Fall/Winter 2013

A Photographic Progress Report on the Middle School Expansion

(A project made possible by your support for the Building Friends Capital Campaign.)

It’s really remarkable how much can change in just a couple of months!

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