Reader wants to let down beau gently
Dear Harriette: For the past few months, I’ve been seeing this guy, going on a few dates and hanging out with him in social settings. Lately, there have been a lot of things going on in my personal life with my family, and I don’t think I’m in the right head space to be there for him. We were never technically a couple, but we were working toward getting there. The other day, I texted my guy telling him that I think we should just be friends. He told me he understood and asked if I needed anything. He is still being extremely flirtatious, even asking me if friends can still
Harriette Cole
SENSE AND SENSITIVITY
kiss. I like him, but I know I’m not ready for a relationship and don’t want to hurt him. How can I make him understand that I’m not in the right head space to date him without hurting his feelings? — Friend Zone Dear Friend Zone: Decide if flirting without strings works for you. You enjoy his company. If you think you can continue to do that casually without feeling the need to commit, maybe he can be fun for this time in your life. If you fear that you may develop feelings for him or vice versa — that could lead to confusion and pain, stay firm and stop going out with him.
Dear Harriette: I’m in the process of looking for an apartment with two of my friends before heading into my senior year of college. Their budget is a little lower than mine, making it unrealistic for us to get an apartment near school, nor get the amenities that I want. A dishwasher and in-unit washer and dryer would make my life way easier, and it’s looking like that’s unlikely Recently another friend who has a similar budget to mine asked if I would like to look for apartments with her I’m at a crossroads, and I don’t know what to do. I don’t want my original two friends to get mad at me for deciding to get an apartment with someone else,
but I would be able to live closer to school and get the amenities I want. I think I’m leaning toward getting the apartment with the other friend closer to school. How can I break the news to my friends with minimal fallout? — Apartment Hunting Dear Apartment Hunting: Think about who you believe you would be most comfortable living with among your friend choices. The biggest challenge will be being in the company of these people on a daily basis. Think about personalities, anything you know about how they live now etc. If you still think that the person with the bigger budget is right for you, go to your other friends and
tell them that you have changed your mind and you no longer want to move with them. Be honest but not brutal. Explain that you want to live closer to campus and you want certain amenities that aren’t in the collective budget. Since that is important to you, you will be seeking accommodations that match your desires. Tell them as soon as possible so that they don’t get caught without enough support to be able to meet their needs.
Send questions to askharriette@ harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
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blueberries are bursting off the bushes this month. He says the last frost in midMarch hit a lot of farms further north and destroyed their crop, but it missed Waughsome Farm.
“We have a lot of blueberries to pick, and the blackberries are coming. They get rolling closer to Memorial Day,” Waugh said. “It should be a good season for both of them. It’s just funny how the timing is a little different every year.”
Open days and hours will vary, according to the season, weather and available ripe fruit. Waughsome Farm will post open days and hours at least a day in advance. The farm will close early if they run out of fruit or if there is inclement weather, including lightning, in the area. Check the farm’s website or Facebook page before heading over for last-minute announcements. The farm will be open this week from 8 a.m. to 10 a.m. on Memorial Day May 25. New pricing process Waughsome Farm has changed the pricing scale for this season. Last year, the buckets were measured by volume — $10 a quart, but this year, they will be measured by weight — $8 a pound.
GRADUATE
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earned his master’s degree.
There is no entry fee, and fruit pickers can bring their own bags and containers to bring the fruit home after it’s weighed and paid for Waugh says refrigerating or freezing the berries as soon as possible is the best route to preserve them. Another new option is the Waughsome Farm-branded “Golden Bucket” for $40 that you can take home. Any fruit picked into the one-gallon Golden Bucket will be 50% off for the current season, and 10% off for later seasons —
And it’s Houston where he lives and works today as a principal process control engineer for Celanese Chemical. By conventional means, Woods’ life has been a success. So, why was he surprised by his senior class favorite title?
“I wasn’t the class valedictorian,” he said. “I was ranked number five or six in our class, so it was probably a bit of a surprise when I think of the people in my class whose grade-point averages ranked higher than mine But I was probably more familiar with the embodiment of our senior class, which was probably why I came to mind.”
Woods was definitely on his classmates’ minds that year, because the senior class also voted him “Most Outgoing.”
Looking back now Woods credits his parents for his success.
“My parents were my inspiration, especially my dad, because growing up, we had to make straight A’s,” Woods said. “That was always his expectation. So, I would say that tutelage and that structure they provided is the basis for what I would consider success to have been then.”
But now, he sees success differently
Today, he defines success as his “overall balance and happiness of life.” Which, for Woods, means his life now travels a different path. His career is important to him, but connections with the people in his life have become top priority
PROVIDED PHOTO BY THE MCKINLEY HIGH SCHOOL ALUMNI ASSOCIATION
Terrance Woods, right, was voted by McKinley High School’s ‘Most Likely to Succeed’ by his senior class in 2006. Today, he is a principal process control engineer for Celanese Chemical in Houston. His classmate, Kahlia Gager left also shared the class favorite title.
He thinks back to the Terrance Woods he was 20 years ago — looking at the future, thinking about what he wanted to do in life.
He says he always knew he was going to be either an engineer or a doctor and today he is fulfilling one of the two aspirations as a chemical engineer
“Though you can achieve all these different things, you have to ask yourself, ‘Am I of living or am I existing? Right?,’”
Woods said “And so I don’t live to work I work to live.”
Woods isn’t married, and most members of his immediate family still live in Baton Rouge.
ZENO
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Zeno was grooving in the background as usual. But as emcee, I sneaked up behind Zeno to share his history and fate with the audience. The standing ovation was long and loud for Zeno, who was touched by the response. He served as an instructor with the University of Louisiana Lafayette’s traditional music program. I asked his advice for students.
Email Robin Miller at romiller@theadvocate.com.
“If you’re going to play — play If you’re not going to play, leave it alone,” he said. Thanks for never leaving the groove alone, Mr. Lee. Thanks to all who helped him see, feel and enjoy his flowers.
Herman Fuselier is executive director of the St. Landry Parish Tourist Commission. A longtime journalist covering Louisiana music and culture, he lives in Opelousas. His “Zydeco Stomp” show airs at noon Saturdays on KRVS 88.7 FM.
Also, each bucket will have a bag inside, and when customers go to check out, the bag will be lifted out, weighed and then sent home with them. Generally, a 1-gallon picking bucket can hold 5 to 6 pounds of picked fruit. Waugh says this new process should speed things up and make it more fair
POSTCARD
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For multiple summers, a reader named Michael G. has sent postcards he made himself from the ends of Kleenex boxes, the fronts of cereal boxes and the backsides of campaign mailers.
So for year five, all postcards are welcome — store-bought, vintage, homemade, improvised.
To spark inspiration for readers, I texted a few artist friends to ask whether they’d be willing to make a postcard, photograph it and mail it in.
Rosemary Goodell got right to work and sent an image of a postcard she painted earlier this week while vacationing in New Mexico. Barbara Hoffman sent an image of a quilted postcard she made and is already mailing. My husband did a quick sketch of a Mississippi River bridge.
Then I texted Kelli Scott Kelly Kelly is a prominent visual artist who teaches at LSU and is known for her work with vintage fabrics and found objects.
When I pulled up her name in my phone, it appeared as “Kelly Kelly.” I thought to myself, “I thought she spelled her first name with an i.” But I sent the text anyway, included a link to a previous year’s launch column and two photographs of homemade postcards. She responded immediately She would be happy to make one, she said, and asked whether the postcard needed to be Louisianathemed. “That works,” I wrote back, “but it can really be about anything you’d like.” She said she was going to have her whole class make postcards. LSU is out of class. But I figured she must be teaching something special and moved on.
The next morning, she texted: “Ok! So are we just designing the front? Or do we write something too?”
I told her ideally both — that the messages are often the best part, that the project runs through Labor Day and that I write about its progress throughout the summer She wrote back: “My kids painted the front. What kind of message should they write on back?” My kids.
I told her whatever they’d like. I mentioned that many of the college-aged interns who help with the project have never mailed anything, that messages from previous years have come from all over the world and said things I still think about.
An hour later, she sent a photograph of the bag of finished postcards The inscription on the outside read: “To: Jan ª Mrs. Kelly.”
That’s when it landed. Somewhere in the momentum of texting, I had completely forgotten that earlier this year that I met another Kelly Kelly She teaches kindergarten at University Lab School. A neighbor’s child is in her class. I had texted the kindergarten teacher The postcards the 5-year-olds created are extraordinary Louisiana through and through: snoballs, alligators, crawfish, king cakes, beads and beignets. Beautifully painted. The full confidence of people who have not yet learned to second-guess themselves. When I reached out to Kelli Scott Kelly to tell her the story, she chuckled along with me and said, “Well, that was what was supposed to have happened.”
Louisiana artist Rosemary Goodell painted this scene, creating a postcard for the 2026 Postcard Project, while vacationing in Taos, N.M.
Louisiana artist Julio Naudin painted this image of a bridge across the Mississippi River for the 2026 Postcard Project.
Baton Rouge quilter Barbara Hoffman quilted this postcard of fabric and mailed it in to help launch the 2026 Postcard Project.
And, I think she’s right. The kindergartners inspired a new goal that a reader suggested last year: Getting postcards from as many places across Louisiana as possible, not just from the state as a whole. If you’re in Natchitoches, Cut Off, Dry Prong, Shreveport, Waterproof, Bunkie, Zwolle or anywhere in between, consider this an invitation. The rest of the world is out there, too. Send bought, found, painted, quilted, cut from a cereal box or drawn by a 5-year-old who signs things with a heart postcards. The goal includes any and everywhere Louisiana, all 50 states and as many countries as possible.
Send postcards to: Jan Risher, The Advocate, 10705 Rieger Road, Baton Rouge, LA 70809. The 2026 Postcard Project runs through Labor Day
STAFF FILE PHOTO BY HILARY SCHEINUK
Owner Chairity Waugh chats with a guest while readying their freshly picked blueberries and blackberries to go home last year at Waughsome Farms in Prairieville.
Woods
PROVIDED PHOTO
STAFF PHOTO BY JAN RISHER
PROVIDED PHOTO
FIGHTING THE SUMMER SLIDE
6 local children’s books that are great for young readers
“Dinos Down South ABC,” written by Ashlyn Blanchard; illustrated by Alexandra Elliot
In “Dinos Down South ABC,” 26 dinosaurs rhyme their way through the letters of the alphabet and the landmarks of the South. Join the Ankylosaurus on a jaunt to the Atchafalaya Basin or watch the Zuniceratops hang with zebras at the Audubon Zoo. Discover why dinosaurs make the best local tour guides. For children ages 3 to 6.
“Hannah Bear and LuLu’s Southern Sneaux Party,” written by Julie Hooks; illustrated by Drew
Beech
The air is crisp in the Honey Hollow Woods, and the sister cubs are busy getting ready for their big winter party But Magnolia, the newest resident of the woods, is feeling homesick and missing her favorite part of the season: snow Determined to make their new friend feel welcome, Hannah and LuLu spring into action with a plan — and one ingredient that could make all the difference. This picture book is a tale of friendship, creativity and the magic of the season. For children ages 3 to 8.
“Henry the Star-Spangled Spaniel,” written by Amanda Martin; illustrated by Zoya Malik
“Henry the StarSpangled Spaniel” is a 32-page illustrated children’s book that follows a courageous and curious pup on a timetravel adventure through America’s founding moments, encouraging literacy, imagination and a deeper understanding of history Henry, a curious Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, discovers that his birthday is shared with the United States of America. The book is a fun way to celebrate America’s 250th birthday
“Roux’s First Day,” written by Julie Gerdes Becnel and illustrated by Cullen Bernard Roux has never felt so nervous. She’s about to begin “kinderswamp-garten,” and she will be the only rougarou in her class.
As she walks to school beneath the towering cypress trees, one by one, fellow swamp creatures join in, each one different from the next. With their help, Roux’s jitters melt into joy, and she discovers that what makes us different is also what makes us shine. Roux’s tale is a celebration of belonging, courage and the magic of being yourself. For children ages 3 to 8.
Summer is here, and that means summer reading is in full gear During the summer months, reading with children is one way to counteract the “summer slide,” or loss of academic skills when school is not in session. Here are a few curated local books for children under the age of 10.
BY JOY HOLDEN | Staff writer
“Where’d You Go, Kitty,” written by Samantha Schott Boudreaux; illustrated by Kimberly Broadbridge Navarrete
A little girl named Cecilia catches a prized parade throw, a little stuffed orange cat, at a Mardi Gras parade, and the two become inseparable.
Cecilia names her stuffed animal “Kitty” and takes it everywhere, including some of New Orleans most iconic venues, such as Café du Monde, City Park and Sal’s Snoballs in Metairie.
Cecilia is always misplacing Kitty, but someone always finds it until they can’t. For children ages 5 to 8.
“Mo Skeedeaux Visits the Smoky Mountains,” written by Sheila Wells Flynn
This story about Mo blends adventure, imagination and emotional learning through the journey of a Cajun mosquito.
Mo leaves the familiar Louisiana bayou and explores the misty peaks of the Smoky Mountains. Along the way, the story gently introduces themes of curiosity, emotional awareness and resilience. For children ages 4 to 9.
Summer books offer something for every
Danny Heitman
I’ve been reading “The Correspondent,” Virginia Evans’ bestselling novel about a modern retiree, Sybil, who composes handwritten letters to acquaintances near and far She even writes notes to authors of books she’s just read, perfectly at ease dropping a few lines to Ann Patchett, Joan Didion or Larry McMurtry It’s how Sybil continues the thread of thought she’s traced through their books. Though few of us would follow Sybil’s example, I’m drawn to her sense of reading as a discussion between reader and writer, an idea with special resonance here in Louisiana. We value lively talk in this part of the world and books, at their best, can be a memorable form of conversation In the spirit of celebrating that connection, I offer some ideas at this time of the year for great summer reads. This isn’t meant to be a Top 10 list; I’m just talking up a few books I’ve recently enjoyed
and that you might like, too.
I’ll start with “Rebecca Sue,” a wonderful new memoir by Kathleen Norris about the author’s bond with her mentally and physically challenged sister Norris has written beautifully about matters of the soul in books such as “The Cloister Walk” and “Amazing Grace,” and what I like best about her work is the way it tries to reconcile the high ideals of spirituality with the often messy realities of daily life. In this way, “Rebecca Sue” is vintage Norris I found a similar sensibility in
“Ordinary Time,” a new memoir by Annie B. Jones that explores “lessons learned while staying put.” Jones once thought her grown-up life would bring glamour and adventure in a big city Instead, she wound up running a bookstore in a small Georgia town. With an open heart that refrains from bland earnestness, Jones writes about how she’s found a deeply meaningful life in a part of the country that many of us would overlook.
Like Jones, poet Connie Wanek is keenly attentive to how what
we call “ordinary life” can yield moments of mystery and wonder It’s why “How to Sing for Money,” her recent collection of poems, has been such an abiding companion for me. One of my favorite poems in the book is “Avocado,” which follows a family uncle as he shops for his wife. Like most husbands with a grocery list, he’s hard-pressed to fulfill the directions he’s been given. In 14 lines, Wanek has aptly summarized the foibles of matrimony
Another recent favorite is “Bookish,” British writer Lucy
Mangan’s love letter to the joys of reading. “I’ve come to realize that possibly the greatest of books’ virtues is patience,” she writes. “They will wait for us to get to them, they will wait for us to return to them, they will allow as many repeat visits to their pages as you ever want.”
All the more reason to enjoy books this summer, and every season of the year
Email Danny Heitman at danny@ dannyheitman.com.
