Are You A Peach Or A Coconut? by Erin Meyer

24 I was having dinner with two German business colleagues. At one point, they were both discussing their children, so naturally, I turned to one of them and asked: “So how long have you been married? In hindsight, and before becoming a cultural expert, little did I know that my question was inappropriate and too personal in German culture. It was a classic mistake. One of the first things you notice when working in a new culture is that the rules about what information is and is not appropriate to ask and share with strangers are different. Understanding those rules, however, is a prerequisite for succeeding in a new culture. One way to find out if you are acting properly is understanding the difference between “peach” and “coconut” cultures. U.S.A. and Japan are good examples of “peach” cultures. Americans and Japanese are “soft” on the outside. They are very friendly to people they just met. They smile at strangers, chat, share information, and are very friendly and helpful. However, once you get past the initial friendliness, you see their real private self is protected by a hard shell of the pit. Russia, France, and Germany are good examples of “coconut” cultures. They are “hard” on the outside. They rarely smile at strangers, do not easily engage in conversation, and may look unfriendly or even aggressive first. However, if you manage to break through their hard outer shell, they tend to become close, loyal friends who will accept you as family. In other words, relationships are built up slowly, but they also tend to last longer. These differences often lead to misunderstandings and conflict: Russians, French, and Germans may think Americans and Japanese are shallow, have a fake smile, are manipulative and egoistic. Americans and Japanese may think Russians, French and Germans are rude, aggressive, humorless, cold, angry, and nepotistic. “Coconuts” may react to “peaches” in a couple of ways. Some interpret the friendliness as an offer of friendship, and when people don’t follow through on the unintended offer, they conclude that the peaches are disingenuous or hypocritical. An Israeli student studying in the U.S. understood this the hard way. Every time he would meet an American student, the meeting would end with “Let’s get together soon” and “got to invite you to the house for coffee.” The Israeli was very pleased with making so many new friends. Again none of those friendships developed beyond the superficial invitations, or they would forget to tell him where they live. Others get annoyed with

the over friendliness. A French woman leaving Walmart was disturbed by Walmart’s greeter’s “peachiness”: “Did you find everything you came in for?” “He doesn’t even know me, why does he care about my purchases?” She felt uncomfortable sharing information with a stranger she never met before as in German culture, one does not easily converse with strangers. Everything is relative. After understanding these differences, we need to remember that when comparing cultures, everything is relative. The British are “coconuts” in California but “peaches” in Paris. And there are also subtle gradations, as caricatured in the old joke about the Swede and the Finn who meet for drinks, spending hours drinking beer in silence. Eventually, raising his glass, the Swede says, “Skol!” The Finn is appalled: “Did we come here to talk, or to drink?” Having said that, it’s odd that in the 21st century, being a part of a hyper-connected world, cross-cultural misunderstandings still retain their power to offend. Can an American even genuinely offend a Russian by asking information that is perceived as too personal?. Or a Brit a South Korean by handling his business card too casually?.

Broken Language

What does it mean to speak a broken language? Broken English is a non-traditionally spoken or alternatively-written version of the English Language, sometimes considered a pidgin. In literature, broken English is often used to depict the foreignness of a character or that character’s lack of intelligence or education.

Accents Are Cool AF

An accent is a stress or emphasis on a particular part of something, usually a word. Accent comes from the Latin accentus, which means “the intonation of singing.” We use an accent for different kinds of emphasis in speech. In some foreign languages, the mark above a letter is an accent that signals how to pronounce it.

Why do I have an accent? People have accents because they match the sound patterns of the people around them. Small differences are reinforced, and eventually, the people in one place begin to sound different from the people in another area. It’s not a shame to speak without an accent; it has never been. If you speak and communicate effectively, I think that’s enough, more than enough. Essentially, that’s the defined standard of English in our country. Still, the unknown ingress leads us into believing that we are speaking wrong English by not having an accent. Hoard mentality, I call it, which is more prevalent in the younger generation.

Playing the Sympathy card

An accent is a stress or emphasis on a particular part of something, usually a word. Accent comes from the Latin accentus, which means “the intonation of singing.” We use an accent for different kinds of emphasis in speech. In some foreign languages, the mark above a letter is an accent that signals how to pronounce it.

Why do I have an accent? People have accents because they match the sound patterns of the people around them. Small differences are reinforced, and eventually, the people in one place begin to sound different from the people in another area. It’s not a shame to speak without an accent; it has never been. If you speak and communicate effectively, I think that’s enough, more than enough. Essentially, that’s the defined standard of English in our country. Still, the unknown ingress leads us into believing that we are speaking wrong English by not having an accent. Hoard mentality, I call it, which is more prevalent in the younger generation.

Never think that what you’re saying sounds ridiculous. Your conversation partner will appreciate the effort you’re making to speak their language or the language they are also learning. Leave the shame behind. Grammar mistakes don’t signify an inability to speak your target language. You know how to speak it when you can express yourself, and in order to express yourself, you need to speak spontaneously and fluidly — not 100 % correctly.

Mistakes are OK; they will help you learn another language. Calmly and collectedly approach your target language. Don’t get frustrated, and never be afraid to learn more.

It’s OK if you forget a word here or there. Try paraphrasing, using a synonym or giving the definition to your speaking partner.

You absolutely do not need to devote a significant amount of time to learning a language. However, you do need to be consistent — even if that means only studying for a few hours each week. It’s useless, for instance, if you devote an entire week to learning Chinese, only not to pick it up for another week or two.

Don’t think in your native language, and then translate into your targeted. Think directly in your target language, even if it takes a while at first.

Always practice your speaking skills with natives. Native speakers are not scary, snobby, rude or whatever else they may appear to be. They will politely correct you, which will help you improve more quickly.

Learn idioms, collocations, and phrasal verbs; they are some of the most commonly used constructions.

You shouldn’t be focusing on grammar at first. Instead, you should be forging a solid base of vocabulary. No matter how many grammatical rules or idioms, you know, you still won’t be able to express yourself fully without this base.

I really wish beginning speakers wouldn't dwell on their mistakes. To me, it's a shame that errors make beginning speakers afraid to learn more. Instead, fuck-ups should motivate them to learn more.

Illustrations GrillaDesigns @elodia_

Credits https://www.gooverseas.com/blog/tips-overcoming-language-barrierswhile-traveling https://www.workitdaily.com/language-barriers-workplace

by Daniel Acevedo