TCB June 2, 2022 — Survivors

JUNE 2-8, 2022 TRIAD CITY-BEAT.COM

SUR VIV ORS How domestic violence survivors find hope and help in the Triad

by Autumn Karen | pg. 4

UP FRONT | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

EDITOR’S NOTEBOOK: A skirmish in the culture war at Northern High School

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determined pair of Guilford County parents lost their case to remove

by Brian Clarey a book from the AP Literature curriculum at Northern High School on May 26, after a school advisory committee voted 12-1 to keep it.

For the parents who opposed it, this was never about the book.

Based on the objections they levied against it, this was about all books, particularly the ones that challenge a reader’s worldview or force them to empathize with characters whose experience may be vastly different than their own.

Because to distill Salvage the Bones — a gripping tale of survival in the rural South in the days before and after Hurricane Katrina by Jesmyn Ward — down to the dirty parts is a crime against literature itself.

In a perverse bit of irony, two parents read the dirty parts out loud during the first hearing on May 19. And that was what bothered Savannah Tuhro, the student liaison on the committee, the most.

There were students present at that meeting, she said, who deliberately did not read those passages

BUSINESS PUBLISHER/EXECUTIVE EDITOR Brian Clarey

brian@triad-city-beat.com

PUBLISHER EMERITUS Allen Broach

allen@triad-city-beat.com

1451 S. Elm-Eugene St. Box 24, Greensboro, NC 27406 Office: 336.681.0704 ART WEBMASTER Sam LeBlanc ART DIRECTOR Charlie Marion

charlie@triad-city-beat.com

SALES KEY ACCOUNTS

PHOTOGRAPHY INTERN Juliet Coen

Chris Rudd

COVER:

Jonathan Jones

AD MANAGER

EDITORIAL MANAGING EDITOR

Domestic violence survivor Lalani Reaves poses for a shot in Borough Market. (photo by Juliet Coen)

noah@triad-city-beat.com

OF COUNSEL

Sayaka Matsuoka

sayaka@triad-city-beat.com

CHIEF CONTRIBUTORS Suzy Fielders James Douglas

james@triad-city-beat.com

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in the book, which was allowable under guidelines set by the teacher who assigned it, Holly Weaver. In this way, Tuhro rationalized, the students were actually forced to take in the very parts of the book those parents found objectional.

“It unsettled me too,” said Tuhro, a senior who will start Western Carolina University on a full academic scholarship in the fall, “and I read the book.”

She was among four committee members who gave their comments on May 26, after time ran out at the last meeting. Tuhro told the group that she had her concerns about the book at first but then, she said, “I was able to find the artistry.” She added that she and her mother had a three-hour conversation about the book’s significance during a long car ride.

Assistant Principal Monique Wallace quoted the definition of AP courses, saying plainly: “Parents do not decide which materials are suitable for college-level courses.”

Art teacher Katie Sayani, one of the committee members, said that everyone in her AP art classes had been talking about Salvage the Bones, and that most of them ended up reading it. As a parent of teens, she said that the music, Tiktoks and televised content that teenagers take in unsupervised

chris@triad-city-beat.com

Noah Kirby

CONTRIBUTORS

Carolyn de Berry, John Cole, Owens Daniels, Luis H. Garay, Kaitlynn Havens, Jordan Howse, Matt Jones, Autumn Karen, Michaela Ratliff, Jen Sorensen, Todd Turner

TCB IN A FLASH @ triad-city-beat.com First copy is free, all additional copies are $1. ©2022 Beat Media Inc.

Design by Charlie Marion

JULIET COEN AP Literature teacher Holly Weaver defends her choice at Northern High.

is “so much more dangerous than the book, facilitated by an amazing educator.”

Before the vote, media specialist Annie Harris addressed the specific complaints one by one: The book did not meet the definition of “prurient” or “obscene” because titillation was clearly not the intent of those scenes, which is what those words mean. It was appropriate reading material for both the grade level and interest rate of the class, according to two groups that classify such things. The committee acknowledged that books the complaining parents suggested as substitute, such as Hillbilly Elegy, were “written by white people,” negating the criteria of diversity under which this book had been selected. They reiterated that parents give “implied consent” when they agree to allow their children to take college-level courses. And as to the charge that the school would have to get parents’ permission to screen a film version of Salvage the Bones at school, Harris called it a “red herring.”

Committee members agreed that

films are vastly different than books, but that if the class was a college-level film course, they wouldn’t need parental permission for that, either.

“The facts aren’t what they say they are,” said parent Elena Wachendorfer, one of the mothers who opposed the book, from her seat in the front row as the votes were counted. Wachendorfer declined further comment to a Triad City Beat reporter, but she has told another media outlet that she and Kimberly Magnussen, the other parent, will appeal this decision.

On May 26, committee members had three choices: Retain the book in both the course and the school library, retain the book in the course but remove it from the school library, or remove the book from both the course and the library.

Before the vote the committee acknowledged that Salvage the Bones was not currently cataloged in the school library.

“If it passes, will we have to buy one?” one member wanted to know.

“We have plenty of copies now,” Harris said.

In a perverse bit of irony, two parents read the dirty parts out loud during the first hearing on May 19.

by SAYAKA MATSUOKA

THURSDAY, June 2 Salsa and Sangria with Lisa @ ROAR (W-S) 7-10 p.m.

Ever wanted to try salsa dancing? Well now’s your chance. On June 2 and 23 visit ROAR’s rooftop for an hour-long professional salsa dancing lesson from Winston-Salem native Lisa Konczal. Don’t need lessons? Come just for the dancing and sangria which starts at 8:30 p.m. For tickets and more info, visit roarws.com.

Super Smash Brothers Tournament @ Boxcar Bar + Arcade (GSO) 8-10 p.m.

Anyone else want to down+B as Kirby for two hours? If you think you’ve got what it takes to dropkick Starfox off of the map and into oblivion, sign up for Boxcar’s Super Smash Brothers tournament on the Nintendo Switch this Thursday evening. And don’t worry, the event is 21+ so you won’t get your pride hurt by a bunch of 12-year-olds, this time.

Call the bar for more info.

SATURDAY, June 4 Culture Grand Opening @ 102 W. Third Street, 9th floor (W-S) 4 p.m.

Join other local artists to celebrate the grand opening of CULTURE, a new studio and gallery space in downtown Winston-Salem. The space will be on the ninth floor of the Liberty Plaza Building and will include photography, spoken word poetry, live music and immersive installations. Refreshments

by Hoots will be available at the event. Visit the Facebook event page for more info.

Who doesn’t love this classic? Cabaret is set in 1929-30 Berlin in the midst of post WWI depression and centers on the underground, avant-garde community. The story follows Clifford Bradshaw, an American writer who wanders into the Kit Kat Klub and meets Sally Bowels, a talented cabaret performer. To learn the rest of the story, buy tickets and see the live performance which will take place in the Theatre Alliance’s new space at 650 W. Sixth St. Buy tickets at theatrealliance.ws.

Grab your sunbrellas and head out to the bicentennial garden this Sunday afternoon for the Parisian Promenade. Complete with massive paintings, sidewalk cafes, fencing duels and the occasional stilt walker, this annual event transforms the city park into a French matinee the likes of which Monet and Renoir would have loved to capture.

Admission is free and there’s parking on site. Visit greensborobeautiful.org/events for more info.

event will feature musician Aloe Blacc, most famous for singing on Avicii’s “Wake Me Up.” Proceeds from the event will support Wake Forest Baptist’s Comprehensive Cancer Center. Visit Ticketmaster to purchase tickets.

Does hearing the first eight notes of the Harry Potter theme give you goosebumps? Then snag tickets for this live concert of music from the first film in the series. Compositions by John Williams and others will be played by the Greensboro Symphony. Purchase tickets at tangercenter.com. The concert will also take place on Saturday.

Sweat the Technique Cypher with Dance Project @ Center City Park (GSO) 6:307:30 p.m.

Cabaret @ Winston-Salem Theatre Alliance (W-S) 8-10 p.m.

Parisian Promenade @ Tanger Family Bicentennial Garden (GSO) 12-5 p.m.

SummerLark Concert featuring Aloe Blacc Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone in @ Bailey Park (W-S) 6 p.m.

Hosted by Innovation Quarter, this fundraising concert @ Tanger Center (GSO) 3 p.m.

FRIDAY, June 3

Looking to test out your dance skills? Every Friday evening community members are invited to Center City Park for a freestyle hip-hop and break jam. The event is open to anyone looking to show off their moves. For more info, visit greensborodowntownparks.org/thingstodo.

SUNDAY, June 5

UP FRONT | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

CITY LIFE JUNE 2-5

Downtown Greenway Community Picnic @ Corner of MLK Jr. Drive and Bragg Street (GSO) 5-7 p.m.

Comedy showcase @ Oden Brewing (GSO) 9 p.m.

Gather at Oden Brewing in Greensboro this Saturday evening for a showcase of local comedians.

Sip some IPAs or stouts while Khari Reid, Todd Riley, Ashley Preston, Harrison Tweed, Hulin Saunders and Jonah Lewis sling jokes in Oden’s backyard. The event is free.

Send your events to calendar@triad-city-beat.com for consideration in City Life and the Weekender.

Join community members at the corner of MLK Jr. Drive and Bragg Street on the downtown greenway for the first ever downtown greenway community picnic! Attendees can pack their own picnic — $10 per person — or purchase a box dinner from Chez Genese or the Historic Magnolia House ahead of time for $25 per person. Beverages are not provided so bring your own. Kids aged 10 and under are free. Visit downtowngreenway.org/ events for the picnic menus and to purchase tickets by Friday.

For further information, email Laura Lorenz at llorenz@actiongreensboro.org.

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NEWS | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

NEWS

The power of ‘I believe you:’ How domestic violence survivors find hope and help in the Triad

by Autumn Karen

CAROLYN DE BERRY

Survivor Eileen Martin left her abusive relationship after her teenage daughter told her, “You don’t deserve this.”

Trigger warning: This article mentions instances of domestic violence and sexual assault, including multiple survivors’ personal experiences.

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hat doesn’t sound like him. I’ve never known him to be violent with women.”

“People loved him. My family loved him.”

“What will this look like to the people outside of this house?”

“He was witty, clever, and charismatic.”

“What did you do to make him hit you?”

Right now, a bright light is being turned onto the subject of intimate partner violence. It’s nearly impossible to escape the current cultural firestorm surrounding the defamation trial between actors Johnny Depp, 58, and Amber Heard, 36.

Wide-ranging and salacious allegations of physical and sexual assault, psychological abuse and substance abuse during the couple’s marriage have been detailed in the weeks-long, televised trial that ended last week in Fairfax, Va. The constant churn of commentary, memes, and Tiktoks has been a catalyst for conflict and conversation.

Though the trial itself centers on two unreachable celebrities, the reality of intimate partner violence and domestic violence hits close to home for victims right here in our area.

Perpetrators of domestic violence don’t usually look like monsters to the outside world. Five survivors in the Triad are speaking up to share their stories in the hope that they can educate others and prevent the kind of physical, emotional and psychological suffering they’ve had to endure.

The myth of the “perfect victim”

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oming forward to speak out about abuse is a terrifying prospect, in no small part because victims don’t always fit the mold of acting perfectly in the midst of abuse. Where the perpetrator projects a sense of calm to the outside world, victims often project a sense of being out of control or unstable due to the emotional and psychological duress they experience.

“People loved him; my family loved him,” says Eileen Martin as she leans forward in a cushioned chair at a local coffee shop. She met her husband through his younger siblings when he came home from grad school years ago. She was a high school cheerleader, and he’d come to games to watch her. They married when she was 18 and he was 26.

Martin recalls being swept up in the relationship at first, but it all changed almost immediately after they were married. Four hours into the car ride to travel 3,000 miles to move, the rain poured down in sheets, creating dangerous road conditions.

Cars were pulling over, but he wouldn’t slow down, even as she begged him to. As she continued to plead, he finally lost his temper and threatened to take her back home and leave her.

Martin’s husband became violent, striking her repeatedly throughout their first year of marriage, up until their first child was born that same year. However, the psychological abuse continued throughout their decades-long marriage. Martin shares that he would lock her in the bedroom, screaming and refusing to let her leave.

“He was always making me seem crazy to everyone around me,” she says.

Her moment of realization came when her teenage daughter told her, “You don’t deserve this.”

CAROLYN DE BERRY

“He always told me that if I ever left him, I’d never see my kids again and I’d never get a dime from him,” she says.

As a stay-at-home mom, the financial implications were terrifying. When Martin finally decided to leave, things got worse. She says that he grabbed her by the arms, had her followed and made threats to cut her arms and legs off.

In the years that came after, her family said they believed her but would not give up their connection to him. To get away from him, she chose to cut ties with many of the people in her life.

“I’ve had to give up a lot for my freedom,” Martin says, her eyes looking emptily into the distance, Now a licensed therapist, she works with

survivors of abuse in the Triad.

Overall, domestic violence rates increased during the pandemic according to the North Carolina Coalition Against Domestic Violence. Three-fourths of service providers in the state reported higher needs for services since the start of COVID-19. According to a study led by researchers from UNC Charlotte, North Carolina saw a rise in intimate partner violence during the pandemic due to increased unemployment, higher than usual levels of alcohol and drug use, social isolation, and COVID related stress.

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Lalani Reaves became a licensed counselor after she left an abusive relationship.

She speaks openly about her own imperfect reactions. After her abuser attacked her and trapped her in her apartment while her kids were at school, she ran for the gun that she knew he kept in the bedroom. Holding the firearm, she ordered him to leave.

Sitting on a couch in the Family Justice Center in downtown Greensboro, she lifts her hands and looks up at the ceiling.

“I thought, What am I doing?,” she says. “If that thing had went off, what would have happened to my children?”

That incident led Reaves to pursue a protective order against her then boyfriend, though he eventually pleaded with her that he had changed, and she let him back into her life.

“The intermittent reward and punishment is powerful,” counsels Martin. “It makes it hard for women to leave.” Another driver for why victims stay is that violence tends to escalate when they try to leave. The most dangerous point in an abusive relationship is when victim informs the abuser that they want to end the relationship, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

After returning the violence quickly escalated for Reaves again, only this time it was worse. Her abuser hid under the bed and grabbed her legs or lay in wait and jumped out from behind the shower curtain, grabbing her and attacking her. The fear of him hiding and suddenly becoming violent left Reaves in a constant state of anxiety.

“At one point, I didn’t feel like anybody could keep me safe,” she says.

Her situation culminated in an incident where he tried to take her car, and her school-aged daughter was knocked to the pavement with the vehicle when he put his foot on the gas as she stood at the window. Though the car didn’t strike her directly, the sight of her daughter being thrown to the ground shook Reaves deeply.

After that, she re-engaged with the protective order.

All along the way, Reaves said she attempted to tell people about what was happening to her, but no one believed her.

“They’d say, ‘That doesn’t sound like him. I’ve never known him to be violent with women.’”

A persistent misconception is that false allegations in domestic violence and inti-

mate-partner violence situations are rampant. In reality, domestic violence against people of all genders is underreported, with only 50 percent of incidents engaging with law enforcement, according to the Department of Justice. Female victims of domestic violence are also four times as likely to refrain from reporting than male victims due to the fear of reprisal.

Societal pressure sustains silence

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n abuser often presents a charming picture to the outside world while terrorizing their victim behind closed doors. Relationships can move at lightning speed, before partners have time to process red flags.

“Three or four months in, he’s already talking about blending families, getting married,” says local survivor Juanyetta Beasley, who met a man through friends in 2019.

“We transitioned into a pandemic relationship that progressed our plans, and we set a date to get married,” she says.

Even before they were married, Beasley saw red flags like increased control over her behavior and outrageous financial demands, but she didn’t want to give up the relationship. Concerned, she reached out to his family members, who she was close to, but they minimized his behavior.

They got married during lockdown, and things escalated within weeks. It began with silent treatment and soon progressed to property damage. He broke things and left holes in the walls.

Eventually, he threatened her and held her hostage. His children finally called the police.

“I thought that I did something to mess up this relationship,” Beasley confesses. “I am the highly-educated African-American woman who cannot hold a relationship together.”

Though law enforcement encouraged her to pursue legal action, pressure from COURTESY PHOTO outside expectations pushed Beasley to Juanyetta Beasley was reluctant to leave her stay silent. He moved out after that inciabusive relationship for fear of what others would dent, but she was still embarrassed. think of her.

“What will this look like to the people outside of this house?” worried Beasley, who was a healthcare leader at a Guilford County hospital at the time.

“How will they judge my ability to lead my team if I don’t follow through with the marriage?” she wondered.

The wakeup call for Beasley came as an actual phone call. A number she didn’t recognize called her repeatedly, until at last she decided to answer. When the voice on the other side said they were a domestic-violence liasion, she closed her office door and pulled the blinds. It was the first time she’d heard the words “domestic violence” associated with her situation.

Only three people knew about Beasley’s situation: the domestic-violence coordinator, her mother and her son. She continued to carefully curate her image socially and at work, pretending be a happy newlywed, hiding the fact that she’d skipped her honeymoon because of the violence. When a coworker pulled her aside one day, Beasley thought she was going to ask about her honeymoon. Instead, the woman said that she had noticed the change in her demeanor. She could tell that something was wrong because she, too, was a survivor of abuse.

NEWS | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

NEWS

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NEWS | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

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NEWS

The revelation that someone at work knew turned out to be freeing, Beasley says.

She went public with her story, taking time off of her job to reset her life, and wrote a book about her experience.

“We have this perception of what domestic violence is, and it doesn’t always look like that,” Beasley asserts. “It makes it hard for some women to identify they are in it.”

Navigating litigation can be brutal

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here are no laws against domestic violence in North Carolina, according to Greensboro Legal Aid attorney Emily Carico, who works with up to 200 cases of domestic violence per year. Instead, there is an umbrella of civil and criminal laws that victims must wade through in order to find safety. The process can be intimidating, financially draining and emotionally exhausting.

A Domestic Violence Protective Order, also known as a DVPO, a 50B, no-contact order or restraining order, is a civil order that grants a range of protections to victims in NC. DVPOs cover stalking, harassment, sexual assault and physical violence between individuals who have a “personal relationship.” Breaking a no-contact order can result in criminal charges. Per the ACLU, North Carolina is the only state that does not codify same-sex couples in its laws regarding domestic violence between dating couples, though the NC Court of Appeals ruled in December 2020 that same-sex couples must be included in domestic-violence protections. That decision was upheld by the NC Supreme Court just two months ago.

To get a 50B, the victim or their attorney files paperwork at the courthouse detailing their claims, then a judge or magistrate can enter a temporary “ex parte” order, meaning that the perpetrator doesn’t have to be present for the initial hearing. Within 10 days, both parties are to appear in front of a judge, who will decide whether to extend the order.

Criminal charges are a separate matter altogether, with a different burden of proof. In NC, criminal acts are considered to be against the people of the state, not against the victim. The prosecutor decides whether and which charges to pursue; police officers responding to the situation can hold offenders for up to 48 hours on suspicion of a crime. For intimate-partner violence, this could include both felony and misdemeanor charges like assault on a female, sexual assault, stalking and kidnapping, among others.

In Guilford County alone, Legal Aid annually supports nearly 1,000 victims in obtaining restraining orders and navigating the civil legal hurdles required to stay safe — free of charge. Carico works closely with survivors to pursue civil protection, but not JULIET COEN all victims know how to get representation.

Lalani Reaves represented herself in Survivor Lalani Reaves became a licensed counselor after she left an abusive relationship. her initial bid to get a 50B at the Guilford County Courthouse.

“His thing was choking,” Reaves recounts. “I thought I was hiding the bruises.”

Reaves attempted to cover the bruises with clothing and makeup when she was around other people. She had text messages and hotel receipts to back up her story, but her abuser appeared in court with a series of counter-claims against her. The judge wasn’t sure the evidence she presented rose to the burden of proof to extend her ex parte order as she didn’t have corroborating evidence from other sources.

Reaves remembers pleading with the judge.

Towards the end of the hearing, one of Reaves’ coworkers presented pictures of

strangulation injuries on Reaves’ neck that they had taken while they were at work.

Those pictures were enough for the judge to grant her a protective order. In NC, initial orders last a year, then a victim can petition the court to extend for up to two years after that.

In half of cases, DVPOs are effective at stopping violence, and they’re effective at reducing it in most of the other half, according to a policy brief from the Carsey Institute of Public Policy. Though these orders are enough to keep many perpetrators from contacting victims or physically seeing them, abusers can still find other ways of seeking control.

Reprisal against reporting abuse often comes in the form of judicial retribution.

Litigation abuse occurs when an abuser attempts to retain control over their victim by continually filing motions in civil and even criminal court. North Carolina is a private warrant state, meaning anyone can go in front of a magistrate and take out a warrant on another party. The prosecutor will decide then whether to pursue charges, after the warrant is out there.

In domestic violence situations, abusers sometimes take out unfounded criminal warrants on their victims through this process, according to Carico.

“Anything an abuser can use to keep control is used as leverage,” she says.

Like other victims, it was a hard road for survivor Keely Jordan to find people to believe her. Now a public policy analyst and intimate partner violence advocate, Jordan met her abuser in college, where she says he was a ‘shining star.’

“He was witty, clever, and charismatic,” she says of her ex-husband. “Everybody loved him.” She says that he was able to hide his drug use and physical violence because he managed to be so high functioning at work.

Far away from family support, she had to navigate her situation completely on her own.

Over the course of her time with him, Jordan suffered from six concussions. One night, when she tried to run from the violence, all of the shelters in Greensboro were full. Jordan had to drive to Reidsville to find safety.

“Child Protective Services had to kick him out of the house,” she says. “He has taken me to court every year since then.”

Like in Jordan’s case, judicial engagement keeps perpetrators connected to their victims, even after the victim leaves the relationship.

In May 2021, bipartisan sponsors introduced HB795 to “regulate and restrict abusive litigation”, but it remains in committee. This proposed legislation specifically targets perpetrators of domestic violence, stalking and harassment to censor their ability to bring victims frivolously into court.

Divorce and custody proceedings are also a massive piece of the puzzle for many people trying to escape violent situations, and they can drag on for years. Litigation abuse sometimes manifests in the form of custody battles, lengthy divorce petitions, libel or defamation cases, or property litigation.

Jordan has spent upwards of six figures on attorney’s fees over the course of two decades, only to be awarded custody of her children again and again with each new filing from her ex-husband. For her, filings often come with life events like her going back to school or getting into a new relationship.

“Every time I get a little agency in my life, he comes in and wants to have control,” she says.

Signs of immediate danger

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rior to the Family Justice Center opening in Greensboro in 2014, Guilford County led the state in domestic violence homicides, according to director Catherine Johnson. Since the center’s opening, the number of incidents has dropped by more than 50 percent, per data from the NCCADV. The center provides aid to victims of domestic violence, sexual assault, child abuse and elder abuse. Twenty percent of the clients supported by the Family Justice Center are male identifying.

Even with the drop in incidents in Guilford County, the numbers are sobering.

More than half of women killed by homicide in the United States are killed by an

intimate partner, according to data from the CDC. Homicide is the leading cause of death for women under the age of 44. Black women and Indigenous women are at the highest risk.

The danger isn’t just for those immediately involved. According to a 2014 study from researchers at the CDC, 20 percent of homicides associated with domestic violence are not committed against the JULIET COEN person who is the initial target, but Abby Catoe left her relationship, she founded Annie’s against neighbors, first responders, After Hope Center, a long-term, safe housing center near friends and family, or bystanders.

Winston-Salem for those like her.

It’s notable that the school shooting at Robb Elementary in Uvalde, TX, last week began as an act of domestic violence against the shooter’s grandmother, whom he lived with.

Abby Catoe is a domestic survivor and founder of Annie’s Hope Center, a longterm, safe housing center located on a 20-acre farm near Winston-Salem.

A safe place wasn’t available for Catoe when she reached out to her church about the violence she experienced at the hands of her husband.

“Elders in my church would advise me to stay in the relationship and to do everything I could not to cause the violence,” she shares.

They would ask her, “What did you do to make him hit you?’” Having grown up watching her mother, Annie, live through the same kind of violence from partners, she didn’t understand how wrong it was.

“He didn’t hurt the kids, so I just thought I’d stay and take it,” says Catoe.

At first, she tried to fight back, once even shooting a gun at him to get him away.

After a while, she stopped retaliating and just took it. The level of physical abuse continued to increase, until one day he broke her nose, nearly ruptured her kidney and sexually assaulted her in front of her young children.

“He said to my kids, ‘This is what happens to trash women,’” she recalls.

Catoe made a plan to leave and worked her way through the difficult path of building a new life. She was able to find a job, eventually earning her Masters of Divinity from Wake Forest University and started Annie’s Hope Center.

“It’s a difficult decision,” she says. “There are lots of reasons why a woman would not leave.”

The real risk of death or serious injury is a compelling reason to leave, though not all victims realize how dangerous their situation is. According to Johnson and informed by national standards, five things that are immediate red flags for increased violence in a domestic violence situation are: strangulation, the victim informing the perpetrator that they’re leaving the relationship, constant jealously, a history of violence and threats of homicide or suicide. When any of these five are present, victims should immediately seek support.

Non-fatal strangulation is a major indicator of homicide in women in intimate partner situations. Women whose partners have choked them are 750 percent more likely to be murdered with a firearm by that same abuser, according to the Training Institute on Strangulation Prevention.

That’s why it’s critical that anyone, no matter their gender or age, reaches out for support if they have experienced domestic violence.

“We believe you and we care about you,” Johnson says. “Not only does your voice matter, but we’ve got your back.”

The Family Justice Center offices in downtown Greensboro and in High Point are open to walk-ins Monday through Friday from 8:30-4:30. Victims can call the 24-hour hotline at (336) 273-7273 to ask confidential questions, discuss options for escaping their situation or get immediate help.

NEWS | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

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OPINION | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

OPINION

EDITORIAL NC’s ‘Don’t Say Gay’ Bill is a paranoid delusion

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rue to its name, North Carolina’s proposed Don’t Say Gay Bill never actually uses the word “gay” or the acronym “LGBTQ,” and only uses the words “sexuality,” “gender” and “pronouns” once each.

But like other bills being promoted around the nation this year, HB755 is designed to appeal to deep fears of conservative parents that our schools are dens of indoctrination and hotbeds of weird, gay stuff they prefer not to understand.

And it displays the ignorance of the legislators behind it, including House Whip Jon Hardister, a primary sponsor who — it seems fair to point out — is unmarried and does not have children himself.

For example, HB755 dictates: “Instruction on sexual orientation or gender identity shall not be included in the curriculum provided in grades kindergarten through third grade,” which ignores more than 100,000 LGBTQ+ adults in NC who are raising children. Must we wait until the third grade to broach the subject as to why Tyler has two mommies?

It also forces teachers to notify parents if their child has made a name or pronoun change at school — in other words, has “come

out” among their peers but not at home. It doesn’t take a parent to see that this dictate pushes LGBTQ+ kids further into their closets, deeper into shame and closer to mental trauma. What it does take is a legislature that wants to punish kids for being gay.

In its treatment of parental involvement in childhood education, the bill assumes parents are expert enough to make recommendations and give critiques as to curriculum.

By and large, however, they are not.

Just 32 percent of North Carolinians have achieved any degree of education past 12th grade, and more than 10 percent of NC adults did not graduate high school at all.

More than anything else, the bill proves the validity of the Leandro decision, which found major discrepancies in our state’s public schools and directed the General Assembly to rectify it financially.

The GOP-led legislature is fighting hard against Leandro, but, aside from the gay issue, their own bill makes mandatory things like college-planning services, mental-health counselors, schoolchoice events and other things that parents in the Triad have enjoyed for decades, but that smaller schools and their students have had to do without.

Jen Sorensen jensorensen.com

Must we wait until the third grade to broach the subject as to why Tyler has two mommies?

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NOW LEASING THE STEELHOUSE CENTER FOR URBAN MANUFACTURING AND INNOVATION

1451 S Elm Eugene Street #BusinessisBuiltHere

CULTURE | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

CULTURE

From A to Zinnia: Glenwood Library’s seed catalog grows a following

by Sayaka Matsuoka

JULIET COEN

The seed library at the Glenwood Library Branch in Greensboro has been steadily growing since its inception in 2018. “It was just my idea for a library program to get people excited about growing things,” says library associate Luce Hartsock.

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uce Hartsock has a lot of marigolds.

As they flip through the paper packets lined up inside of the decades-old filing cabinet at the Glenwood Library, they pass almost an entire section containing only marigold seeds. The next row over boasts all zinnia seeds.

“I have so many marigold seeds to put in here,” they say as they look at the small collection that’s been growing since 2018.

Hartsock is an associate with the Greensboro Public Library who is in charge of adult programs for the Glenwood Branch. Since 2018, they’ve been lovingly trying to grow the seed library that currently is housed in the top two drawers of a four-foot-tall metal filing cabinet that they suspect once held microfiche.

The concept behind the seed library is simple. Like one would check out a book, patrons are encouraged to come and peruse the selection of seeds, take what they want and cultivate their own plants at home. Once they have succeeded in growing something and they want to give back to the library, they can bring their own seeds to share.

“It was just my idea for a library program to get people excited about growing things,” Hartsock says. “I know Glenwood as a neighborhood has a lot of community gardens in the area. I know a lot of folks in recent years have gotten more interested in growing house plants and stuff, so it was just an idea to make plants and sharing the resource of plants more accessible to people.”

The project started in 2018 with a plant share, Hartsock says, when a few local growers brought in some houseplant cuttings, vegetables from their gardens and yard perennials like irises. A local farm donated several vegetable starts like kale and tomatoes. After the success of the plant share, Hartsock says they started keeping seeds in a small box for people to come and take. That eventually grew into a four-drawer catalogue, which then became the larger cabinet where the seed library is housed today.

The goal, Hartsock says, is to encourage people to grow things and to create plants that are adapted to the area.

“I think it would be really awesome to get more people involved in helping bring back seed from the community because it helps create plants that are adapted to the environment,” they say. “When there’s things like climate change or different changes in weather, communities are able to create tomatoes that are adjusted to the conditions of Greensboro, NC, which I think is really incredible.”

They also think that teaching self-sufficiency is valuable in a time with rising inflation and supply chain issues.

“I think that there’s something really wonderful about people learning their own power and their own abilities for self-sufficiency or just creation,” they say. “It’s sometimes hard to convince adults that they can do something, and they can have fun, too.”

In the years since the pandemic, the idea of mutual aid and the sharing of resources has taken off as well. Last year, a community fridge opened in the

Warnersville neighborhood of Greensboro for people to drop off fresh food for anyone to take. The seed library follows that kind of model so it’s a bit different from a traditional library in which people bring the items back.

“I think there’s a type of shock that happens,” Hartsock says. “Like even at the 2018 plant share, people were like, ‘This plant is for me? For free?’ I think that we do so many things that are expected to be transactional and involve money and like everything is for sale.”

Hartsock points to a nearby table where they have put out pots of chive starters for free for patrons to take.

“Like we’ve got plants sitting out today for people to take home for free,” they say. “And people get so confused when I tell them that.”

But watching and getting to know the community of growers in the area, Hartsock has learned that there’s not only an abundance of plants and seeds, but also an abundance of knowledge and passion for gardening.

“Gardeners are just so generous and so excited to share whatever plant they were able to take up out of their yard to share with other people,” they say.

Plus, once you successfully grow one plant, it’s easy to collect seeds for next season or to share.

“I think that’s one of the wonderful things about saving seeds is that one plant can generate a whole bunch of seeds to share with so many people

Mobility Options Exist – The Choice Is Yours

by Regina Gardner / Piedmont Authority for Regional Transportation

Recent bus driver shortages interrupting our local public-school systems and rising gas prices bring an issue to the surface that those of us in Transportation Resources work hard to untangle. Why is a large segment of the population in our region not utilizing alternative modes of transportation?

When the bus driver shortage threatened to shut down Guilford County public schools, it was troubling to watch parents thrown into chaos, as were most of the student riders who were high school-aged young adults. Parents went on the news worried about their grown kids hopping on the city bus and shuttling across their hometown streets to get to school. Social media chatter was hot on the topic, and neighborhoods went on various message platforms talking about the havoc that was sure to come.

and make so many more plants,” Hartsock says.

And sometimes, even if you fail to harvest the plant you can still get seeds.

“Even if I’m not great at growing cilantro because it gets so hot in North Carolina so fast, I can really grow some coriander and bring that in for people,” Hartsock says.

Right now, the library has a lot of flower seeds and some vegetable seeds donated by the Guilford County Cooperative Extension that would be good to plant next year. For the future, they envision having so many seeds that entire shelves could be taken up by just peppers or leafy greens. But for now, Hartsock says they want to see more people utilize the resource because the seeds go bad if they stay in the cabinet for too long.

“A lot of the seeds in the library right now are getting to the point where we need people to take them home,” they say. “So it’s great when people take them home because it means that they’ll go get grown which is their job. It would be the same if we had books on the shelf. We want them to get checked out; we want them to go home with people.”

CULTURE | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

CULTURE

To access the seed library, visit the Glenwood Library Branch at 1901 W. Florida St. in Greensboro. To donate seeds or to learn more about the program, email Luce Hartsock at luce.hartsock@greensboro-nc.gov.

SPONSORED CONTENT

But students rode the city bus, and havoc never came. Various local news outlets reported that Guilford County School (GCS) and Greensboro Transit Authority (GTA) officials felt that everything went smoothly.

Kevin Elwood with GTA issued this statement, “We recognize that there are perceptions out there about the safety of using public transportation, especially with children, but we emphasize the fact that we have professional drivers [and] we have cameras on the buses that record all the activities …” (wfmynews2).

Fast forward to May 2022, and gas prices reached record highs. It is no surprise that Americans are susceptible to the cost of oil. When it comes to getting around, the United States is a worldwide outlier. Decades of car-centric land-use decisions have created a landscape where owning a motor vehicle is almost required. As a result, “Americans currently consume roughly 20% of the world’s oil despite having less than 5% of the population” (The Philadelphia Inquirer, LLC).

With the idea that public transit is an easy, safe, and affordable option, we should rethink how to utilize alternative forms of transportation, especially in the Triad region, where an excellent system is already in place.

Narrowing down our vast region to focus on Winston-Salem, High Point, Burlington, and Greensboro, there is already a seamless bus system working. Within each city, the agencies work together to

offer standardized payment methods and service delivery and identify areas where partner consistency is beneficial to our riders. An excellent example is that each agency promotes biking as an option and has equipped their vehicles with the same standardized bike racks.

Unique to our region, Piedmont Authority for Regional Transportation (PART) connects member counties and cities so citizens can easily commute throughout our region utilizing public transportation. PART also offers a Vanpool service designed to help people in the Triad share their ride to work. It works through a lease that is split among the group members. The more people, the lower the cost. They offer 7 to 15 passenger vans to groups of 3 or more people on a month-tomonth lease.

As an added option to encourage alternate means of mobility, PART manages 17strategically placed Park & Ride lots throughout our member counties. These offer free day parking to those sharing rides, accessing bus systems, vanpooling, or utilizing other modes of transportation. In addition, some of these Park & Ride lots offer electric vehicle charging stations for commuters.

And we can’t have this conversation without mentioning our fragile planet. Most citizens now see the sustainability of our natural environment as necessary. And the Triad can beam with environmentalist pride that our communities have positioned us with a comprehensive and valuable public transportation system. Now, all we need to do is utilize it! Expand it and enhance it! There is no better time than now to make our move!

RideTheTriad.org

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CULTURE | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

CULTURE

Q&A: Artist Jasmine Best talks self-care, fabric plants and new community-oriented residency

by Sayaka Matsuoka | photos by Juliet Coen

From May 31 through June 26, textile and fiber artist Jasmine Best will be producing new work as part of the Greensboro Residency for Original Works at the Greensboro Cultural Center. On Thursday, Best will be hosting a meet-the-artist event from 6-8 p.m. She will also be in the studio for First Friday from 5-9 p.m.As part of her residency,Best will be offering workshops in fiber arts including fabric plants. Workshops are free but registration is encouraged at jasminebest.com/growresidency. To learn more about studio hours and Best’s upcoming exhibit, visit creativegreensboro.com.

Q A

Congratulations on the residency. Tell me about it and what kind of work you’ll be making.

The GROW residency focuses on community engagement, so I wanted to create a more social-practice oriented piece. A lot of my work draws from personal memory, and I wanted to open up my practice to take in what I hear from the community. Often times people will tell me stories of what my art reminds them of, and I’ve never before recorded those stories. I wanted something that opened up my practice to the city of Greensboro.

This particular exhibition will hopefully be shaped on the idea of caring.

Earlier this year I started creating pieces that linked my lack of self-caring to how to I cared for my house plants. I realized that I used them to set a gauge to check in on myself. The exhibit will be about how we care for other things instead of ourselves and how we can link it back to caring about ourselves.

I’m curious in what ways people care for themselves, or what are they good at caring about or what are they bad at caring about. I’m hoping to turn these into pieces that are similar in aesthetics to fabric plants that I’ve made before by mixing what people are telling with text as image with these fabric plants.

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Q A

Tell me about your background and your work.

So I mainly do fiber and textile installations. My art practice is based in Black, Southern, femme identity. I consider my work to be Southern, and I’m a truly Southern artist. For me that means a focus on storytelling, and not shying away from the legacy of slavery in the South. A lot of my work is rooted in memory.

Q A

Back to this idea of self-care, describe how you came up with this idea.

I imagine everyone was really struggling for different reasons for taking care of themselves or their loved ones during the pandemic whether it was physically or mentally or a mixture of both.

For me, it was a lot of knowing when to disengage from what I was seeing online and out in the world and taking time to just be by myself.

It was also a matter of creating boundaries, really — creating boundaries socially as well as with work and knowing when to check in with myself.

I was seeing that I was checking in with my plants and my garden but noticing that I wasn’t checking in with myself with same level of care.

I knew what a wilted leaf meant, but I wasn’t giving that same sort of meticulousness with myself. I think it’s easy to ignore ourselves; it’s easy to think that this body is just a machine that will keep going without fuel or the limited amount of fuel.

CULTURE | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

CULTURE

Jasmine Best draws inspiration from her art from history, folktales and her personal memories. A mixedmedia artist, she uses everything from digital paintings to fabric sculptures to embroidery.

Q A

So what changed?

For me, since it was easier to see signs of things outside of myself, I could say, ‘Well, my plants are wilting,’ and I noticed that I wasn’t watering my plants when I wasn’t feeling well. So I would water my plants and then make sure I was getting water. If I had to move my plants, it was a seasonal checkmark. So I’m thinking, What do they need? A lot of plants don’t do well in the winter and a lot of people get seasonal depression when it gets darker outside, so I was conserving my energy, not going out as much.

Q A

How do you hope to use this idea of self-care to engage with the community?

I’m hoping to start gathering information from the public as well as hosting series of workshops, like a leaf-making workshop to paint or embroider things onto the leaves. For the plant-making workshops, we’ll be making small plants which includes a lot of hand sewing which I find to be a good time to meditate and reflect on yourself. I’m hoping to use what I’m learning from the community to work in other people’s thoughts and words to leave a larger work. I am leaving Greensboro, and I would love to have a series of work that reflects my community.

Q A

Where will you be going?

I will be starting an MFA program at the University of Georgia in Athens.

It’s a three-year program that’s very interdisciplinary. I’ll be focusing on expanding my work, medium use, printmaking, sculpture, possibly even jewelry-making. I think this is a great time to focus on my art practice.

Q A

How long have you been in Greensboro?

I’ve been in Greensboro for close to eight years. I moved here for school and went to UNCG and then I stayed. I have honestly fallen in love with this city; it’s kind of obnoxious. I tell people about how we have the best restaurants and parks. Also the art community in Greensboro is lowkey a family. We look out for each other; everyone is a person or two away from being connected. The city has been so great to me.

Q A

Why do you create art? Why is it important?

Artmaking is still a form of self-care for me. It’s the closest thing I can think of as meditation. It’s something I would do no matter where I was at in my life. If I could not create art, I feel like my life would feel stagnant. If I go too long without creating art, there’s something wrong that I need to check in with.

Art is something that’s always been in my life. I’ve always been involved in the arts since I was born, so I don’t know what my life would look like without actively pursuing or practicing art — it’s part of who I am.

In general, I think art allows us to talk about things with people that’s harder to do otherwise. I think it’s one of the best forms of communication we as humans have. I think it’s important now because now there’s so many means to disrupt communication, there’s so many means to twist communication, so many ways to dissuade honest communication or clear communication.

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SHOT IN THE TRIAD | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

SHOT IN THE TRIAD

BY CAROLYN DE BERRY

Martin Luther King Jr. Drive, Greensboro

This Neoclassical Revival style home is one of 73 properties deemed unsafe that will be demolished by the city. It was built for John A. Hodgin, a real estate developer and president of a number of local businesses, between 1910 and 1913.

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‘Study Time’s Over’—we’re missing some conclusions.

by Matt Jones

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS:

Across

1. Oscar follower?

5. Nutini with the upcoming album “Last Night in the Bittersweet” 10. Perform terribly 14. Dutch cheese variety 15. Actor Elgort of “The Goldfinch” 16. Peace Nobelist Wiesel 17. Offices of a N.Y. conglomerate (as opposed to their online services)?

19. Tip slightly 20. Kind of squad or rally 21. Title fish in a Pixar movie 22. He’s (spoiler alert) “The Monster at the End of This Book” 24. “Chains of Love” duo 26. Día de Martin Luther King Jr. month 27. Moves, in real estate jargon 28. Prefix meaning billion 31. Bran muffin bit 32. Bad thing to say at a driving test when asked to put it in neutral?

36. What tempeh might replace 39. What a time zone might be named after 40. Pub potables 41. Underwater version of a Britney Spears hit?

44. Shag, e.g.

45. Inkling 46. Carpal tunnel locale 50. Aluminum foil alternative 52. It’s full of -ologies 54. Mathematician/philosopher Pascal 56. Explanations 57. Soft shoe, informally 58. Bldg.’s rental units 59. Option to take during “Choose Your Own Oration”?

62. Fence around a racetrack 63. Discussion group 64. “Heads up” abbr.

65. “Auld Lang ___” 66. Night, in Napoli 67. R&B artist who got his nickname from a producer who made comparisons to “The Matrix”

Down

1. Sneeze inducer 2. Stick 3. Venmo’s parent company 4. Wake-up times 5. 1970s AMC car 6. “What’s in ___?”

7. World capital on a fjord 8. Table part 9. Couturier Cassini 10. Back with money 11. Popeye’s paramour 12. Gym class challenge, maybe

PUZZLES | JUNE 2 - 8, 2022

CROSSWORD

© 2022 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com)

13. Promises to wed 18. Occupied 23. Realize, as profits 25. Not quite 28. Time’s 2019 Person of the Year Thunberg 29. Aoki of the PGA 30. Post-punk fan’s group, maybe 33. Nothingness 34. “Behold!” to Caesar 35. “___ bleu!”

36. Confections first made in the 1930s 37. Part of a 2022 U.S. women’s soccer negotiation 38. One way to prepare potatoes 42. Altoids purchases 43. “In my dreams!”

47. Time doer 48. “Star Trek” engineer 49. Synthpop kin 51. Passage in a plane 52. Bedding layer 53. Washing machine stage 55. “30 for 30” airer 56. Took off 60. Kung ___ shrimp 61. Pizza option

SUDOKU

© 2022 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com)

LAST WEEK’S ANSWERS:

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Spacious outdoor amphitheater | FREE Midday Mountain Music Music Center Road, Galax, VA | Parkway Milepost 213 (866) 308-2773, ext. 212