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departments 7 T HE HIGHROAD: Scott Walker budget cuts 8 DANISH PLAN: Longmont fracking suit: What if Longmont wins?

8 LETTERS: Anderson right on healthcare needs; Comic generalized women; Bikes should follow laws; Good competition; Colorado against Obama; Civility by proxy; What would it take, Congressman?; Confused by Barack 43 OVERTONES: Mary Lambert asks her fans to be present 45 ARTS & CULTURE: A screening of ‘Transamerica’ offers a chance to learn 47 BOULDER COUNTY EVENTS: What to do and where to go 53 POETRY: by Stephen Arney 54 SCREEN: ‘No Escape’ shows why travel is bad 55 FILM: Summer 2015 was a fine season for film 57 CUISINE REVIEW: Moxie Bread Co. brings Old World pastries and breads to Boulder County 59 TIDBITES: Food happenings around Boulder County 65 DRINK: Cocktails to see summer out 71 ASTROLOGY: by Rob Brezsny 73 SAVAGE LOVE: Foot fetish female wanted; more Ashley Madison woes 75 WEED BETWEEN THE LINES: Using actual evidence to discuss cannabis 77 IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: Enforcing Boulder’s occupancy limits; Gluten?

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September 3, 2015 Volume XXIII, Number 5 As Boulder County's only independently owned newspaper, Boulder Weekly is dedicated to illuminating truth, advancing justice and protecting the First Amendment through ethical, no-holdsbarred journalism and thought-provoking opinion writing. Free every Thursday since 1993, the Weekly also offers the county's most comprehensive arts and entertainment coverage. Read the print version, or visit www.boulderweekly.com. Boulder Weekly does not accept unsolicited editorial submissions. If you're interested in writing for the paper, please send queries to: editorial@boulderweekly.com. Any materials sent to Boulder Weekly become the property of the newspaper.

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Boulder Weekly

the

Highroad Scott Walker cuts higher-ed budget

by Jim Hightower

M

eet Scott Walker, corporate whore.

The Wisconsin governor says he should be America’s president because he’s a proven budget whacker who, by gollies, has dressed down teachers, slashed funding for higher education, busted unions and gone after welfare recipients. He’s the Koch brothers’ favorite because he’s tough on government “moochers” — unless, of course you’re a corporate moocher. If a corporation wants public

money… well, then Walker’s your go-to Wisconsin whore.

Wesley Edens could vouch for the governor’s willingness to bestow public favors on big men with big money.

Edens is a New York City hedge fund gazillionaire who bought the Milwaukee Bucks pro basketball team last year. Showing the usual ethical perversity that afflicts “private-enterprise” sports owners, this flim-flamming carpetbagger immediately demanded a $250 million subsidy from Wisconsin and Milwaukee taxpayers to build a sparkling new sports palace for him.

Oh golly, Scott squealed with unseemly delight, it will be my exquisite pleasure to ramrod the deal through my Republican legislature for you, and I’ll also schmooze secretly with Democratic officials of Milwaukee County to get them to put out for you!

Edens did his part to consummate this

For more information on Jim Hightower’s work — and to subscribe to his award-winning monthly newsletter, The Hightower Lowdown — visit www.jimhightower.com.

back alley affair by doling out ownership shares of his basketball team to prominent Republicans, including Jon Hammes, a developer who happens to be co-chairman of the national finance committee for Walker’s presidential run.

Sure enough, in mid-August, the beady-eyed governor signed this $250 million giveaway of public money into law. Compounding his sleaziness is the fact that, only one month earlier, Walker had slashed $250 million from the budget of the University of Wisconsin. So, if you’re keeping score on Scott, corporations get the goldmine, students get the shaft.

This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.

September 3, 2015 7

Really BAD Ideas

letters Anderson right on healthcare needs

Bravo!! You have clearly presented the essence of America’s health reformneeds and options (Re: Universal health care for Colorado, Aug. 27).

Barry Karlin, Doctor of Public Health/Lafayette

Comic generalized women

Reading Tom Tomorrow’s strip about the Republican party’s appeal to women (Re: Tom Tomorrow, Aug. 20).

This post, aside from the typically trite, liberal narrow mindedness, displays a gross generalization of women in this country. Do you truly believe that all women embrace the murder-funded, depravity of Planned Parenthood and the like? Obviously you don’t. Your publication is disturbingly void of fair, thoughtful journalistic integrity. Have the courage to at least consider other viewpoints.

Luke Hansen/Internet

Bikes should follow the law

Manfred Schwoch has a few points to make (Re: letters, August 27) about the way cyclists are treated on the roads. I am not opposed to sharing the highway, though I believe that in the face of never-ending sprawl, bicycles are less practical (and I’ve lived in Europe).

Moreover, for sport riding — hopefully away from cities — more danger must sadly be accepted owing to narrower roadways.

First, what makes Mr. Schwoch think drivers of autos treat only bicycles poorly? If I had a dime for every stop sign run or cell phone detachment, I could talk ship to shore.

Second, it is possible some motorists have a low opinion of cyclists for some valid reasons. A better relationship could be cultivated if bicycle riders scrupulously followed a few simple practices: (1) ALWAYS obey ALL road rules, especially stop signs; (2) WALK your bike across EVERY roadway, no matter what (it’s the rule!); and (3) NEVER, EVER ride elbow to elbow; tandem or single file is also the rule.

Look them up. And if those are a burden, then you know there are alternative modes of travel. And entertainment.

Gregory Iwan/Longmont

A good competition

I was very excited to read the article

by Paul Brown (Re: “The US and India compete to have the largest solar power field in the world,” Aug. 27). It’s great when we hear that nations are competing for something that will benefit the 8 September 3, 2015

whole planet.

The time has passed when we can delude ourselves into believing that climate change isn’t real. So it is very reassuring when we hear of massive efforts to help reduce greenhouse gas emissions.

The problem that still exists is that we are continuing to extract fossil fuels from the earth’s core. We are being warned by scientists that if we continue to dump CO2 into the environment at the current rate, even with solar power taking its place front and center on the energy stage, we are headed into unknown territory with the warming of the environment.

Citizens’ Climate Lobby is a national organization which is trying to get legislators in Washington, DC to introduce a Carbon Fee and Dividend Bill which would tax carbon at its source (well, mine, port of entry), and then return all the tax revenues back to the American households. Yes, it is true that if we put a fee on carbon than the cost of fuels would go up, but we know how human psychology works. If things cost too much, we use less of them or seek alternatives. And with the extra money coming back to the households, people could chose to spend that revenue how they wanted. Maybe they’d start to drive less and then could afford to upgrade their home appliances to make them more energy efficient. All of this leading to less CO2 being put into the environment.

If you are interested in learning more about Citizens’ Climate Lobby and a study they commissioned to see what effects there would be on the economy and the health of the environment go to https://citizensclimatelobby. org/.

Another great thing you can do is write Senators Cory Gardner and Michael Bennet and Representative Jared Polis and let them know that you want them to support a carbon fee and dividend.

Cleaning up our environment will take a multi-pronged approach.

Continue adding more solar power fields AND put a fee on carbon. We are entering an exciting time as we let the market move us forward and the American people speak up and let Congress know what we want.

Roberta Benson/Boulder

Colorado against Obama

It was disappointing but not surprising to read that, without a consensus from the people, Cynthia Coffman see LETTERS Page 10

Relax, Xcel doesn’t have a leg to stand on when it comes to municipalization.

by Joel Dyer & Dave Kirby

danish plan Longmont fracking suit: What if Longmont wins?

By Paul Danish

L

ongmont’s ban on fracking, which was struck down by a district judge earlier this year, appears headed for the Colorado Supreme Court.

So the time has come for Longmont’s city fathers, mothers and taxpayers to give some thought to what happens if the city wins.

There’s not much mystery as to what happens if Longmont loses. The fracking ban goes down the drain and TOP Operating Co., the oil company that controls 1,287 acres under Longmont, starts drilling.

The more interesting question is what happens if the city wins and the ban stays in place.

The issue that’s currently being argued in the courts is whether Longmont has the power to ban fracking within its city limits or whether that power resides exclusively with the State of Colorado (which state law says it does).

The suit doesn’t get to the broader question of whether the ban is constitutional under the Fifth and 14th Amendments of the U.S. Constitution and similar clauses in the Colorado Constitution — that for decades have been interpreted to mean that government may not deny a property owner all uses for his property, without paying compensation for its value.

In Colorado, mineral rights are a property right that may be bought, sold, owned and leased separately from the surface rights on a parcel of land. The legal term for this is “split fee” ownership.

Under Colorado law, the owner of the mineral rights beneath a property has the right to extract the minerals without the permission of the owner of the surface rights. (He may, however, be on the hook for any damage to the surface rights he might cause.)

So if the Colorado Supreme Court ends up ruling that Longmont has the right to ban fracking under the city, Longmont can expect to be sued by TOP Operating Co. — and anyone else who owns or leases oil and gas mineral rights under the city — on grounds that the ban works to deny them any economically viable use of their property and therefore constitutes a “taking,” the equivalent of an outright confiscation in the eyes of the law. And if they win, the city has to compensate them for the value of the property that has been “taken” ­— the oil and gas in the shale in this case.

So how much could Longmont be on the hook for if it won the right to ban fracking and then left its fracking ban in place?

One way to make an estimate see DANISH PLAN Page 10

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letters LETTERS from Page 8

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has decided to pit Colorado against Obama’s plan to reduce carbon emissions 32 percent by 2030. Garnering praise from the Coal Industry Association, Coffmann cited job loss, increased cost of goods and services and an unreliable grid system as the reasons we should ignore the increasing hazards of an abnormally warming planet.

Firstly, yes there will be job loss in the coal industry but significant job growth in the industry of renewable energy systems. Secondly, solar and wind energy are already cost effective compared to coal fired electrical production so we should actually see a decline in the cost of goods and services. Lastly, we already have an unreliable grid system and see blackouts on a regular basis. The smart grid of the future will allow for multiple sources, including community and individual energy systems of all kinds and of course, coal and gas, to chime in automatically from local and remote areas when needed.

DANISH PLAN from Page 8

(short of drilling a few test wells in the city to find out what’s actually under it) is to look at how much oil is being produced from wells in the same Niobrara formations east of the city in Weld County.

Based on the results from wells drilled in Weld County, Longmont’s exposure could run into the hundreds of millions if not billions of dollars.

Anadarko Petroleum and Noble Energy are routinely completing wells in the Wattenberg Field with an Estimated Ultimate Recovery over the life of the well of 750,000 barrels. At $100 a barrel, the price of crude oil before the current crash in oil prices began a year ago, that works out to $75 million a well.

And the companies are drilling a dozen or more wells per square mile.

But let’s make a conservative estimate. Let’s assume that the parts of the Wattenberg Field that underlie Longmont aren’t as rich as those in Weld County, that Longmont wells would ultimately yield only 375,000 barrels each not 750,000, that the price of oil will stabilize at $50 a barrel (half of what it was last year) and that the companies drilling in the Longmont area would drill only four wells per square mile. That still works out to about $75 million a square mile.

Longmont currently covers more than 26 square miles, which suggests it could in theory end up looking at a

It is not Colorado against Obama nor coal versus renewables, nor us verses them. It is about how mankind can steer away from self destruction by accepting the realities it has engendered.

Tom Lopez/Longmont

Civility by proxy

This has been a difficult month for Tea Party types and others whose irreverence, intractability and even incontinence confront, dismay, and embarrass us all. Worst, those politicians-for-sale (or rent) who want to pander to these ugly strains in order to gain power now may have fewer clear avenues to the bottom.

First we have the new Encyclical from Pope Francis. Can you imagine?

Trying to do something about imminent climate change is a moral issue?

Aren’t these self-righteous charlatans see LETTERS Page 11

danish plan couple billion dollars in compensation if its ban on fracking holds up.

To be sure, not all 26 square miles of the city would be in play. Chances are that many Longmont property owners still own the mineral rights under their homes and businesses and that the City of Longmont owns the mineral rights under some of its public property holdings. It’s also possible that there are large parts of the city that oil companies aren’t interested in leasing.

But even if the only land in play turns out to be TOP’s 1,287 acres, the city could end up having to pay about $150 million in compensation.

Personally, I think the (almost entirely theoretical) risks from fracking are so small, the economic and strategic benefits from not being dependent on oil imports are so large, and the legal risks from banning it are so great, that leaving the ban in place verges on insanity.

However, if Longmont has its heart set on permanently banning fracking under the city, it should do it the same way the City of Boulder and Boulder County permanently prevented open space from being developed — raise taxes and use the revenue to start buying mineral rights.

More about that some other time.

This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.

Boulder Weekly

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the same people who thump the Bible at every turn, telling us where we’re all wrong? Biblical interpretation is not the same, alas, as revealed truth.

Then we had the sad incident (is this the 10th or the 11th mass shooting in the USA this decade?) Never mind gun control. Isn’t it odd that bias and hatred based on economic position and human rights abuses took precedence here and grew into some kind of political conundrum? Who knows; perhaps the far right planted that dispute after the church shooting.

Then the Supreme Court got into the act. Could we expect the ultraconservative element to actually respect the Constitution they so often lean on, as they march in front of it? If these rubes won’t at least acknowledge the Pontiff, the Supreme Court, the Constitution of the United States, and 150 years of jurisprudence and civil law, to what under the sun will they bow?

I earnestly hope the rational part of the electorate will realize just what we have running things today. And understand why nothing goes anywhere inside the Beltway. The GOP is so busy scratching for incrimination about Benghazi or clawing to overturn Obamacare that crumbling highways, second-class education, and so many other needs are ignored. For variety they try to cram fracking or some other devilish scheme down our throats.

Too many of these whitewashed characters, like their owners, pay little or nothing in taxes. Hence, they have no skin in the game. Small wonder, then, that the rest of us suffer. We must ask ourselves: when was the last time the GOP did ANYTHING positive to advance the well-being of the common person? I’ll wait.

There may yet be time to save this republic and our society. But it is very short.

Gregory Iwan/Longmont

What would it take, Congressman?

Now that Congressman Polis has voted to give the President fast track authority to ramrod the massive TransPacific Partnership (TPP) through Congress without amendments and with minimal debate I wonder what it would take for Mr. Polis to reject the agreement dubbed “NAFTA on steroids.�

For Mr. Polis it wasn’t enough that fast track undermines congressional authority to oversee international commerce. It wasn’t enough that the TPP Boulder Weekly

had been negotiated in secret under the auspices of nearly 600 corporate advisers with virtually no members of the public or their representatives in attendance.

It wasn’t enough that according to data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics earlier agreements such as NAFTA, the World Trade Organization (WTO) and NAFTA expansion deals had led to the offshoring of 57,000 American manufacturing facilities and the loss of nearly five million American manufacturing jobs.

Apparently, it wasn’t enough that NAFTA fostered wage stagnation in the U.S., stimulated mass immigration, accelerated the erosion of the American middle class, and gave rise to environmental cesspools on the other side of our southern border.

So what would it take for Mr. Polis to reject the TPP? Would it be enough knowing that several parties to the agreement have abysmal human rights records, shelter slave traffickers and harbor criminal gangs that murder hapless migrants then bury their remains in mass graves?

TPP will add 9,000 potential corporate litigants from Japan, amd other developed countries to those who could sue the U.S. over laws protecting public health, consumers, workers and the environment. Would that be enough to convince Mr. Polis to vote no? Might the prospect of tens of millions losing access to affordable life-saving drugs to profit big Pharma be sufficient for Mr. Polis to nix the TPP? Please call Mr. Polis and ask him what it would take.

Ken Bonetti/Boulder

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news Joel Dyer

After a July fire destroyed much of the Rocky Flats Lounge, the owners are trying to get the storied bar back up and running.

Ghost Stories

I

The ongoing tale of the indestructible Rocky Flats Lounge

by Matt Cortina

f the fire had totaled Rocky Flats Lounge, you might not believe it ever existed. But there’d be too many people with ghost stories to say for sure.

It was a Thursday afternoon one year ago this week. The first people to show up at the Lounge were two blonde-haired girls. They wore shirts that said “Rodgers” on the back and talked about Wisconsin. They ordered a pitcher of Leinenkugel to their table and waited for the game to start. It was the beginning of the Green Bay Packers football season at the Lounge.

The stream of green and gold flowing through the shabby wooden door picked up over the next few hours. By kickoff, there wasn’t a chair, stool or bench unoccupied; it was standing room only and there was no more room to stand. All eyes were fixated on the collection of pre-HD televisions mounted haphazardly throughout the bar, pool room and patio.

It was a big game. Not only was it the season opener in a year when the Packers had a legitiBoulder Weekly

mate shot at the Super Bowl, but they were playing a new rival in Seattle. See, the Packers, or maybe just their fans, were still reeling from a bizarre Hail Mary pass two years prior that was aided by a blown call by part-time referees. This was payback. The atmosphere in Rocky Flats that night, 1,000 miles away from the game in Seattle, was buzzing.

But it felt more like a family reunion than a pitchfork mob. As the game settled in, the avatars of Packer greats like Paul Hornung, Reggie White and Donald Driver passed from group to group to greet friends and neighbors. Two Brett Favres met each other by the kitchen window, and one ordered cheese curds. Bart Starr drank PBR. A little wide receiver weaved her way back to her family’s table by the old, unlit fireplace with a plain hamburger in hand.

On the TV, the Packer quarterback was sacked time and time again as the night wore on.

The game soon got out of hand. When the final blow was dealt, and the Packers were doomed to

defeat on their redemption day, the room deflated. Well, it exhaled. Because soon the wind of laughter and hope for the other 15 games, the earnest belief that “We’ll get ’em next time,” filled the room. It was only a game, after all. Back slaps abounded, tabs were paid and plans were made to meet next Sunday back at the Lounge for another Packer game, or else on Friday for the fish fry.

But this year, for the first time in 30 years, the doors will likely be shuttered at Rocky Flats Lounge for the start of football season. A fire ripped through the interior of the restaurant in July, burning the beer taps, the televisions, the multicolored holiday lights, the Brett Favre bobble heads and the Super Bowl banners.

Owner Wyman Stacey says he’s trying to get at least the outdoor section open for the team’s first game on Sept. 13. There are obstacles and inspections that need to be dealt with. There is even the likelihood that the Lounge doesn’t See ROCKY FLATS Page 14

September 3, 2015 13

news ROCKY FLATS from Page 13 Joel Dyer

return at all. roll office for the plant from 1952-57. When But if history is any indication, Rocky it was moved across the highway, it was used Flats Lounge will be back soon. It has as storage for construction equipment for already lived many lives, and the stories it two years, before it was remodeled on the tells are too good to go up in smoke. inside and turned into the Rocky Flats The story of the little bar in the middle Lounge in 1959. of nowhere starts in 1870. Bill Hogan, who “I was pretty young, and a guy came now owns the land and building the Lounge along and wanted to open up a restaurant,” calls home, was bequeathed the property by Hogan said via the oral history program. “So his father, who got it from his father, who him and my dad worked on it and put it got it from his father — a man who bought together and fixed it up and started it as a the land while homesteading in the area in restaurant.” the 1870s. Hogan was born in 1941 in They bought a long, wooden bar from a Boulder, and the family moved to a home in Holiday Inn in Boulder, because due to Eldorado Springs in 1953, keeping the familiquor laws in Boulder at the time, the hotel ly’s vast area of land just south. was unable to sell liquor by the drink, and In that same year, the United States thus had no use for their bar.

Atomic Energy Commission (which would The Lounge underwent another remodel later be known as the Department of in 1963, and Larry Wilson, vice president of Energy) built the Rocky Flats nuclear power the Rocky Flats Cold War Museum and a facility. The Dow Chemical Company first former plant engineer, says by then “it was operated the plant, and its primary purpose actually a pretty decent place for an afterwas to build plutonium pits, which are essenwork get together.” The Lounge soon tially the core component of major explosive became colloquially known amongst plant materials. workers as Building 93, as in, “I’ve got an In oral histories collected by the Maria appointment in Building 93.”

Rogers Oral History Program at the At about the time of the remodel, the Carnegie Library in Boulder, workers at the liquor store that Hogan’s father had owned Rocky Flats Lounge owners Wyman and Pat Stacey holding a signed football plant largely expressed the belief that they (and sold by then) burned down. The buildsent by the Green Bay Packers. were providing a service that benefitted ing was scrapped, and so Rocky Flats national security while working at the plant.

Lounge remained just about the only waterThe ’50s saw the start of the Cold War and many in There was still, however, the recognition that the ing hole between Boulder and Golden for the throngs the plant saw nuclear development as a valuable tool materials in use at the plant were not safe, even if the of workers at the facility. in winning a global arms race. magnitude of its hazardousness wasn’t fully underThe plant kept plugging along throughout the ’60s “I saw Rocky Flats as a good place to work and as stood at the time. despite two major incidents. The first saw members of an instrument that essentially kept the United States “Well, I felt like we were this one big, happy, dysthe plant go on strike to protest working conditions out of war for 50 years,” said John Beachem, an engifunctional family,” said Jacque Brever, a chemical and hours. Larry Ferris, a clerk at the plant, was at the neer at the plant. “Even though maybe none of what operator. “Yeah, we were really close. You didn’t piss Rocky Flats Lounge the night workers organized the they were making was used — just the fact that the each other off. You didn’t do that. You just did not do strike. items were there kept the United States in a strong that. You got little surprises for doing that, like dip“I walked across the field at two o’clock in the position where they didn’t have to fight a war.” ping your hands in the [critical] drain and flicking it morning to get to the plant from the old bar that sits Many workers described the plant in the ’50s as an in the radioactive water on someone as they’re walkout there,” Ferris said. “The employees, the union at exciting and rewarding place to work. Picnics, outings ing by and coming up all of a sudden contaminated that time, the Steelworkers, decided they were going and parties all occurred from time to time, the pay when you know you haven’t been anywhere. The first on strike. The strike was difficult, there was tacks was good and their work was fulfilling. thing that you do is, you think, ‘OK, who did I piss thrown on the road, road blockage, and a lot of other “We pretty well knew what the project was all off? What did I do?’” things went on, and we walked across the field in the about,” said Herman Conrad Anderson, a lab operaBy 1957, 27 buildings had been erected and made middle of the night. … There was mass picketing to tor. “It was — you have to understand that in ’51, operational at the plant, but two temporary buildings close the plant entirely. A lot of confusion for a few when news had come out about atomic energy, there were dragged across Highway 93 and sold to the pub- days; the strike went on quite awhile. It was difficult.” were many conjectures as to, hey, this was the new lic. The plant had brought an influx of workers to the The strike eventually settled but in 1969, the plant thing, it’s going to make life a lot simpler. Like maybe area and had attracted talent from across the country. endured the largest industrial accident in the U.S. at even running automobiles and so on.”

Hogan’s father recognized a business opportunity. the time. A fire started in a plutonium glove box and All the work that was done with plutonium and He bought the relocated buildings and turned one spread to several areas. The cleanup took two years into a liquor store. The family lived in one half of the other hazardous materials was done in glove boxes, due to the hazardous nature of the materials involved. building, and sold spirits and beer out of the other Anderson and others said. Many of the nearly 100 Meanwhile, Highway 93 was proving a treacherhalf. Rocky Flats employees were the primary custom- ous drive for anyone not associated with the plant. former employees of the plant who were recorded in er base. the oral history program say it was a safe working The other relocated building was the former payenvironment.

See ROCKY FLATS Page 16 14 September 3, 2015

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The Rocky Flats Plant served as the Lounge’s primary customer base for three decades.

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That is, it was becoming clear that as the plant went, so did the Rocky Flats Lounge, it seemed.

“Driving on 93; there was a bumper sticker out at one time, and it said, ‘Pray for me, I drive 93,’” said Don Getman, a former employee. “And that was kind of true, because in the wintertime the wind and the snow and fog, you couldn’t see. That was the most dangerous part.”

When the ’70s rolled around, the bar had deteriorated into a dive bar, said Wilson with the Rocky Flats Cold War Museum. In fact, he said, the bar closed for a brief time when someone was shot and killed there in the mid’70s.

The plant continued its downward trajectory as well. When new owners were brought on, workers reported an immediate drop in morale. But most damning was the increased pollution coverage and safety hazards to the environment, plant workers and area residents that occurred in the decade. The federal government bought a buffer zone of land around the plant to reduce the risk of widespread environmental contamination, but it didn’t stop landowners in the area from filing suit against the plant in 1975 for such offenses. In 1978, 60 protestors from the Rocky Flats Truth Force were arrested for trespassing on the property.

And in 1979, Jackson Browne and Bonnie Rait joined 15,000 people in the area to protest the plant. Studies on contamination caused by the Rocky Flats plants increased and so did protests.

But just as the plant seemed

doomed to its ultimate fate, the Lounge started to write its own history. Joyce Hawley, a woman from Wisconsin, bought the bar in 1978 and sought to change the quality and atmosphere inside it. One of her earliest and most popular decisions was to hold Friday night fish fries. She shipped in walleye and perch from the Midwest to cook for plant employees and any transplants who happened to stop by. When Wyman Stacey, the current owner, joined a few years later after moving from South Carolina, he brought with him Mississippi catfish and frog legs.

“I didn’t know what a walleye was,” Stacey says.

Hawley was a Chicago sports fan — in fact she had a large satellite put in so she could catch Chicago Cubs baseball games. The unlikely transformation to a Packer bar didn’t happen until one Saturday in 1985 when a Wisconsin transplant noticed the oversized dish and stopped in to inquire.

“My story’s always been I became [a Packer fan] in 1985,” Stacey says, laughing. “One Saturday someone came in and asked if he brought about 20 people in here, would I find the Packer game? I said, ‘You bring 20 people here, I’ll find a Packer game.’”

Stacey is a Vietnam vet with a bleach white George Jones haircut and a healthy love of motorcycles. He talks deliberately and has an easy-going, friendly demeanor.

When Rocky Flats workers would come in for lunch, dinner or drinks through the ’80s, ultimately the final decade for the plant, Stacey says they didn’t want to talk about work, and he Boulder Weekly

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didn’t ask. He never had any health concerns working in and owning the Lounge, even as he says he watched nuns walk by and protest, or when the man with the beating drum made his pilgrimage from Boulder to the plant.

Stacey says none of the protestors ever came in for a drink.

Eventually the plant cut lunch hours from one hour to 30 minutes, and Stacey says it became pretty hard for workers to duck out for that short amount of time for a meal. Workers on the first shift would still come in for drinks after 4 p.m.; workers on the second shift at about midnight.

And it didn’t stop the bizarre stories from rolling into the Lounge. Stacey recalls the time country Wyman Stacey with the package of memorabilia singer Jerry Jeff Walker sent by the Packers. stopped by one night in the late ’80s, likely the first bar Walker saw on his route says, ‘My friend’s Jerry Jeff Walker. He from the Jefferson County airport on just wanted to know if you still had his up north. hat.’”

“Three guys walked in one Monday Though Stacey says there was never night and sat down and ordered beer,” a scheduled music program at Rocky Stacey says, “and I looked at them, and Flats Lounge, a bluegrass band made of it was back when the satellite was going members from the plant would play strong and we had the country music once or twice every fall in the ’80s. It station. I kept looking at him and I also wasn’t rare for impromptu perforsaid, ‘Hope you don’t mind me askmances from esteemed singers and laying… what’s your name?’ He said, ‘Jerry men alike from time to time either.

Jeff Walker. Mr. Bojangles.’

As the Lounge stayed afloat, 1989 “He said, ‘If we go get our guitars saw the beginning of the end for the and start playing music, you won’t call Rocky Flats plant. By then, reports of everyone you know?’ I said, ‘We won’t major health issues from former workcall anyone.’ So we had a free concert ers had begun to surface. Many workers going on and people coming in and out were soon being diagnosed with lung and just thought he was a drunk playcancer, berylliosis, reactive airway dising the guitar. … He stayed ’til like one ease, radiation exposure and other in the morning. I think he was drinking exposure-related diseases.

Coors. Then when he was leaving, he The FBI and EPA raided the always wore that hat, cowboy hat, he plant in ’89 and found major and said, ‘Anything I can give you? multiple violations of federal antiSouvenir or something?’ I said, ‘I don’t pollution laws. In 1992, the plant know of anything.’ He said, ‘How ’bout laid off 4,500 workers, and orders my hat?’ So he took off his hat and were put in place to deconstruct the signed the inside of it and gave it to facility and begin cleanup. me, and he left.

There was a dip in business, Stacey “About a few years later, a guy says — losing 4,500 potential customers comes in one Friday night and he said, in a day does that to a business. But ‘Friend of mine left his hat here, do you 1992 also happened to be the year Brett still have it?’ And I said, ‘Well we Favre took over as quarterback for the always keep a rack back here. Everyone See ROCKY FLATS Page 18 leaves their coats. Let me check.’ He Boulder Weekly

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Packers, ushering in two decades of success for a franchise that had bumbled its way at the bottom of the league since 1968. With that new success brought new customers to the Lounge, which had gotten the nickname, among others, “the Packer bar.”

But the Packers only played once a week, four months a year. Keeping the business afloat required Stacey, who bought out full possession of the bar when Hawley died in 2001, to be more than just a Packer bar. Stacey says the Lounge, during the week, may no longer support the workers at the Rocky Flats plant, but it does bring in a varied crowd, including those from the sawmill and cement factories nearby. Motorcyclists, like himself, appreciate the no-frills, middle-of-nowhere vibe of the Lounge.

Poker games began to take place in the pool room that was added on to the original building. Catholics, he says, come by for the fish fries in droves during Lent. A patio was constructed and the outdoor area was fitted with horseshoe pits, allowing those customers who take a chance on that shabby-looking bar way out where to drink cold beer and watch the sun set over what is likely the best view any restaurant has on the Front Range. The construction of the patio also coincided with the enforcement of the smoking ban in Boulder. Lying just outside Boulder County, Rocky Flats Lounge became a place for those who hadn’t given up.

Also benefitting the Lounge during the ’90s and ’00s was the massive influx of residents to Boulder and Jefferson Counties, and Stacey says the slow development in Arvada has put more people in the bar’s proximity.

The bar was never going to make Stacey a fortune — he knew that — but the Lounge was suddenly the only building that remained from the plant, and it was making him a living.

And then, in the middle of the night, on July 15, a fire sparked in the kitchen roared through the interior of the restaurant. Nearly everything inside was insinerated or else ruined beyond repair: kitchen equipment, beer taps, televisions and the hundreds of pieces of Packers memorabilia save for one banner. The wood from the original payroll office building at the plant went up like kindling.

If you drive by now, you’ll see what looks like the same old run-down bar.

But two months after the fire, you can still smell the smoke if you put your nose to the wood.

Inspectors have told Stacey it’s unsafe to go in the building and over the last several months, he’s worked with insurance companies to find out how to repair and rebuild the restaurant. Stacey says he could be months away from opening the interior, but he is trying to work with several Jefferson County agencies to set up the outside patio to provide the food, beer and services required to accommodate the hundreds of displaced Packer fans who want to watch the season open like they always have — at Rocky Flats, with friends.

These are the same Packer fans who Stacey says have reached out to him hundreds of times since the fire offering to replace burned memorabilia out of their own collections. These are people who are offering their professional services to help get the restaurant up and running again.

And it’s the Packer organization that, when they heard of the fire, sent Stacey a box filled with a Packer jersey, banners, a football signed be the entire team and a letter.

“Thank you for your contribution to our team over the past 30 years.

We hope you are able to rebuild soon and continue your tradition of providing a Lambeau Field environment to Colorado Packer fans,” the letter read.

Rocky Flats Lounge is resilient. So is Stacey and his wife, Pat. But it’s the community that supports this bar-thatcould. A community of bikers, of Packer fans, of poker players, of old and new factory workers, and of journalists who like to drink PBR on Thursdays.

It’s the people that make Rocky Flats Lounge so endearing, but the fact that it still stands is magic.

“We’re the neighborhood bar without a neighborhood,” Stacey jokes. “Not many left like this.”

The day after the fire, before the locks had been thrown on the door, a regular patron walked through the mudroom, turned left and walked down the end of the bar, Pat says. He either didn’t see or didn’t care about the wreckage the fire had wrought. He wanted a beer.

He could’ve been a mirage. Then again, the Lounge could be, too. But there are too many people with stories about this place for it not to exist.

Boulder Weekly

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Boulder Weekly

news A toxic legacy

The Gold King Mine spill is a sobering reminder of the number of abandoned mines in Boulder County

by Caitlin Rockett

F

or decades after the first gold was found addressed. near Gold Hill in 1859, Boulder County “But none of them have direct flows going into endured a boom and bust cycle of mining waterways as is the case with Gold King,” Brannon as veins of minerals were discovered, mined says. and abandoned. The County is built, quite Even so, leaky mines have wreaked havoc on literally, on gold, silver, lead, tungsten and zinc, minWestern waterways. erals that brought droves of settlers to the Front “Mining in the western United States has contamRange in the late 1800s and created a mining industry inated stream reaches in the headwaters of more than that still exists today.

40 percent of the watersheds in the West,” the While these abandoned mines may seem like Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) writes on endearing pieces of Western history, the early-August their website. blowout at Gold King Mine near Silverton, Colorado While mining may seem like an innocuous pro— an EPA-triggered accident that turned the Animas cess, metals like gold, silver and copper are rich in sulRiver turmeric yellow — serves as a reminder of the fide minerals, which, when exposed to air and water, toxic legacy mining has left behind in the Courtesy of the Environmental Protection Agency/Wikimedia Commons West, including right here in Boulder County.

Colorado’s share of the burden

The EPA’s website says that as of March 2012, the agency was spending $30,000 per day to treat contaminated mine drainage at the Summitville Mine in Colorado, “which will cost an estimated $170 million to clean up.”

Located in Rio Grande County, just 25 miles south of Del Norte, the Summitville Mine was first excavated around 1870, according to the EPA. However, the area was mined out by the mid-1880s.

The site was reopened a number of times in attempts to extract more gold, but traditional mining techniques proved unsuccessful.

The site wasn’t lucrative again until the mid1980s, when a new company — the Summitville Consolidated Mining Company, Inc. — bought the area and used new techniques to extract gold by treating the ore with a sodium cyanide The Western mining legacy solution, which pulled gold out of the Of the more than 550,000 abandoned ore. The valuable metal was extracted mines in the United States, Colorado is from the resulting solution using activathome to approximately 23,000 of those, ed carbon in a large pool known as a according to the Colorado Geological heap leach pad.

Survey.

The EPA claims that a leak was Boulder County sits on one of two almost immediately detected in the liner mineral belts in Colorado. Known as the of the mine’s heap leach pad.

Colorado Mineral Belt (CMB), this strip The state government issued the of deposits extends some 250 miles north Summitville Consolidated Mining from the La Plata Mountains in the Company a cease-and-desist order in southwestern part of the state to Boulder County. It is the CMB that bore the 1991 after high levels of heavy metals lion’s share of the state’s silver and gold were found in surrounding waters, predeposits. sumably due to the damaged pad liner in The majority of Boulder’s mining the heap leach pad. The mining compaindustry was “hard rock” mining for minny filed for bankruptcy in 1992 and the The blowout at Gold King Mine served as a reminder of the hundreds thousands of erals and precious metals such as gold, EPA assumed cleanup of the site, but it abandoned mines in the West, and the threat those mines pose to the environment. silver and tungsten. And while hard rock would be another three years before the mining was lucrative, the process of site was placed on the National Priorities exposing these metals created what has become one of yield sulfuric acid. And if this doesn’t seem bad List of Superfund sites. the West’s most enduring environmental concerns — enough, the resulting sulfuric acid can further dissolve At the time they took over the Summitville Mine acid mine drainage. other harmful metal and metalloids, such as arsenic, cleanup, the EPA estimated that 3,000 gallons of conVirginia Brannon, director of the Colorado from surrounding rock. taminated water were leaking from the site every minDivision of Reclamation, Mining and Safety, says that ute. Troublesome contaminants included copper, cadThe resulting toxic byproducts can occur at any there are about 500 abandoned mining sites that cremium, manganese, zinc, lead, nickel, aluminum and point in the mining process, from the underground ate environmental issues statewide and about 220 of iron, which leaked into tributaries of the Alamosa tunnels where miners excavated rock, to waste rock those affect waterways. piles, to open pits, leach pads and tailings. Earthworks River and eventually into the river itself. The contam“The fact of the matter is that the vast majority of conducted a literature review on acid mine drainage ination ultimately wiped out all life across a 17-mile abandoned mine sites are actually just mine openings, stretch of the Alamosa River. and found that “no hard rock surface mines exist and they are a public safety issue — and that’s most of today that can demonstrate that acid mine drainage This year marks the fourth five-year review of the what we have, especially in Boulder County,” Brannon can be stopped once it occurs on a large scale.”

Summitville Mine site. says. “It’s not tailings piled up or soil that’s contamiTroubling as it is, the Summitville Mine is only Over time, acid mine drainage can make itself visnated or waterways getting contaminated — it’s an one such story of mining contamination in the state. ibly known — it creates an obvious yellow-orange old mine opening, and maybe people think it’s cool to substance (sometimes known as “yellow boy”) when Many of the state’s abandoned mines leak at consisgo into those when in fact it’s extremely dangerous. the pH of affected acidic water raises above 3, causing tent low levels throughout the year. Some release toxic Or people fall in — it’s happeend in the backcountry.” iron to leach out. (Remember high school chem — wastes during the spring melt. Still others release large Brannon says there are six abandoned mines in quantities of contamination in one fell swoop — in the natural pH of water is 7.)

Boulder County with environmental, as opposed to the early 1980s, a spill occurred at the California The resulting precipitates can smother plant and public safety, issues; two have been remediated and animal life, as well as decrease the pH of the stream. have on-going treatment, while four have not been See MINES Page 22 Boulder Weekly

September 3, 2015 21

news Courtesy of the Environmental Protection Agency/Wikimedia Commons

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Gulch Superfund site near Leadville, Colorado, killing off aquatic life on the headwaters of the Arkansas River. In 2009, thousands of gallons of Tangcolored mining waste flowed into a 400-mile watershed at the North Fork of Clear Creek, again killing life along part of the river.

With 23,000 abandoned mines, limited funding for cleanups and mining sites located across public and private lands, the possibilities for disaster are daunting.

Trouble at home With Boulder’s rich history of mining, the county has shouldered its share of mining’s toxic legacy.

Just a mile and a half south of Ward in Boulder County sits the Captain Jack Mill site at the headwaters of the Upper Left Hand Creek. The site includes a number of mines, the Big Five discharging tunnel, a waste rock pile and a settling pond.

To fully understand the problem at Captain Jack, you have to first understand the flow of water near the site: Left Hand Creek is fed by James Creek, which in turn is fed by Little James Creek.

Little James Creek is currently devoid of life, but full of arsenic, beryllium, copper, iron, lead, manganese and zinc — all mining products. Yet by the time the Little James meets James Creek, just a mile downstream, most of the metals have settled and aquatic life resides. Even further down, where James Creek meets Left Hand Creek, the water is even cleaner — but not before Left Hand Creek gets a dose of polluted runoff from abandoned mines at the Captain Jack site.

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The Captain Jack Mill site near Ward, Colorado, was made a Superfund site in 2003 after years of reports of polluted water.

federal government didn’t got involved at the Captain Jack site until September 1986, when the Mine Safety Health Administration (MSHA) found the owners of the site improperly storing chemicals at the mill buildings. The EPA sent an emergency response team to the site.

They recovered and removed barrels of chemicals, and then the EPA began testing Left Hand Creek.

But it wasn’t until 1992 that the Colorado Mined Land Reclamation Division received reports that mill operators were dumping waste directly into Left Hand Creek. The EPA was alerted soon after when a Boulder County Health Department official noticed a milky substance in the water. Subsequent water samples reveled high levels of zinc, cadmium, copper and lead.

The Left Hand Water District temporarily shut down its intake value while the EPA cleaned up, and the Captain Jack Mill was soon shut down permanently. In 2003 the EPA decided that the risk was too large not to place the mill site on the National Priorities List as a Superfund.

And while all eyes are on abandoned mines in the wake of the accident at Gold King Mine, Brannon from the Colorado Division of Reclamation, Mining and Safety asks people to remember that it was only in 1977 that the federal and state governments created laws to regulate soft and hard rock mining practices.

“People tend to think there’s always a responsible party or there most be some kind of financial assurance or someone we can go after,” Brannon says. “And in these old mines where mining happened before we had laws to restrict their activities, we don’t usually have anyone to go after.”

Boulder Weekly

news Courtesy Touché Howard

SENSING TROUBLE Critics claim new EPA methane regulations are based on measurements that underestimate the real threat of global warming

by Angela K. Evans

I

n the fight against untary programs and selfglobal warming, both reporting mechanisms. “I carbon dioxide and don’t think industry is all methane are known too happy with the regulagreenhouse gases that tions,” says Harry Weis, effectively trap heat in the chair of the environmental earth’s atmosphere. and natural resources pracAlthough there is distice at Ballard Spahr LLP, agreement on which gas the law firm representing contributes more signifithe oil and gas industry. cantly to global warming, “Industry would say in experts and scientists some places it might be across the spectrum conhard to disagree, like in Colorado, ‘We’re already clude that methane ultisubject to regulations and mately traps heat at a rate of 20 to 100 times greater the state is doing a fine job than carbon dioxide. taking care of it.’”

On Aug. 18 the U.S. But while the industry Environmental Protection maintains this position, Agency (EPA) released leading methane experts proposed regulations to question the proposed curb methane emissions EPA methane regulations from the oil and gas sector Touché Howard, standing in front of a valve from a natural gas transmission pipeline, questions the accuracy of as well. methane emissions estimates due to faulty sensors in technology he invented. across the country by 40 Robert Howarth, proto 45 percent from the fessor of ecology and envi2012 measurements by ronmental biology at 2025. These regulations are the first attempt by the short tons of methane, or the equivalent of 9 million Cornell University, has been vocal about the severity EPA to address methane emissions specifically as the metric tons of carbon dioxide, from oil and gas emisof methane as a greenhouse gas for several years. agency estimates close to 30 percent of methane emis- sions by 2025, according to an email from Enesta Although Howarth is pleased that the EPA is directly sions due to human activity in the U.S. are from the Jones from the office of media relations. The EPA is addressing methane emissions in the proposed regulaoil and gas industry. currently taking public comment for 60 days following tions, he still feels they fall short in two ways. First of The agency’s regulations propose emission stanthe regulations posting to the Federal Registrar on all, the regulations only apply to new developments in dards for new developments for all production, proAug. 27 and will consider all comments before makthe oil and gas industry — new wells, new facilities, cessing, transmission and storage facilities associated ing the final ruling, which it estimates will be released new pipelines — without addressing the leakage from with both oil and natural gas development. It will also by spring 2016. infrastructure already in use that may be anywhere require operators to find and repair leaks for these The oil and gas industry has long argued there are from 50 to 100 years old. “new and modified emission sources.” The agency already enough regulations at both the state and fedThe U.S. Energy Information Administration estimates this will result in a reduction of 400,000 eral level to mitigate methane emissions through vol(EIA) reports 363,559 oil wells in its most recent data 24 September 3, 2015

Boulder Weekly

from 2009. Additionally, the EIA reports 487,286 producing natural gas wells in the U.S. as of 2013, making a combined estimated total of 850,845 oil and gas wells. The non-profit FracTracker Alliance reported 1,156,870 operational oil and gas wells in the U.S. as of February 2014, which they calculated from individual state reporting. Regardless of which number is accurate, none of these wells will be covered by EPA’s proposed regulations.

Secondly, Howarth contends the EPA has underestimated the extent of methane emissions and “under-characterized” methane’s contribution to overall greenhouse gas emissions on a national scale.

“They’re 10-fold off in terms of how important methane is as a starting point. And then they’re ignoring the current emissions and just looking at new infrastructure. It’s just way off the mark of what’s needed,” Howarth says.

He says the EPA has traditionally favored a bottom-up approach using source measurements to determine methane emissions rather than a topdown method, utilizing airplane flyovers to measure the amount of methane in the air at any given time. He questions this method, specifically how emissions are source-measured across the industry as the proposed regulations would rely heavily on the self-reporting of the oil and gas industry.

And Howarth’s concerns are not without merit.

In a paper released Aug. 4 in Energy Science & Engineering, Touché Howard reports sensor failures in the Bacharach high flow sampler, an EPA-approved instrument and a common device used by the oil and gas industry to report greenhouse gas emissions to the EPA through the Subpart W section of the Greenhouse Gas Reporting Program.

With a background in environmental engineering and air pollution control, Howard invented the high flow sampling system in 1993 and for the next decade any recorded measurements using the technology used either his sampler or one of his design. However, the device was not commercially available, so in 2003 Bacharach, Inc. developed the Bacharach high flow sampler for commercial use, implementing Howard’s idea but using different sensor technology.

The sampler utilizes two different sensors, a catalytic oxidation sensor and a thermal conductivity sensor. The oxidation sensor measures natural gas levels between 0 and 5 percent. If natural gas levels are higher than 5 percent, the sampler should automatically switch to the thermal sensor to accurately measure emissions. However, according to Howard’s tests, the Bacharach sampler Boulder Weekly

failed to switch to the thermal sensor, meaning that the device was recording much lower emission rates than were most likely occurring.

Through further testing, Howard concluded in his paper that updating the software and frequently re-calibrating the device solves the sensor failures.

Although he tells Boulder Weekly he recently saw a Bacharach sampler that still failed even after meeting these criteria. “We certainly think updated software and frequent calibration has been shown to improve performance dramat-

ically but we still don’t understand all of the problems,” he says.

Howard says the discrepancies he’s found using the Bacharch high flow sampler has created uncertainty within the field of methane emissions based on measurements taken from the device.

He also allows for variability across these measurements as not every device may be experiencing the same issues, depending on the version of software, frequency of recalibration and level of expertise of the person taking the measurements.

Howard accidentally happened upon this problem while testing a Bacharach device for a client in January 2013. He took measurements with the device and then compared those numbers to measurements done with his own sampler, at which point he noticed a difference. He didn’t do much with his knowledge at first, but in October 2013 when an Environmental Defense Fund study out of the University of Texas released its findings of methane See METHANE Page 26

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news METHANE from Page 25

emissions at natural gas facilities based using the sort of instrument Howard on measurements using the Bacharach just criticized?” he asks. However, both sampler, Howard realized the problem Howard and Howarth remain unclear could have far-reaching consequences. whether or not measurements using the Although he alerted the authors of the Bacharach high flow sampler went into study to the issue he experienced with the recent proposed regulations. the sampler, it took him almost two “They’re (EPA) not good at documentmore years to conduct his own study ing what they’re doing,” Howarth says. and publish his findings at the beginAnthony Marchese, professor of ning of August 2015. mechanical engineering at Colorado “If we had disclosed Courtesy Robert Howarth State University, has this in the fall of 2013, also studied natural gas that’s a whole other emissions and proposes year of Subpart W another theory for the measurements that data EPA uses as the were made without 2012 baseline for emispeople realizing there sion reductions prowere problems,” posed by the regulaHoward says. “Second, tions. He suggests the the Environmental EPA could have used Protection Agency the Greenhouse Gas could look at this issue Inventory (GHGI) to determine emission and say, ‘Hmm maybe levels in 2012 instead we could do prelimiof reported emissions. nary regulations but GHGI is an annual factor in the fact that Robert Howarth, professor of report released by the we don’t have enough ecology and environmental EPA tracking greendata yet and allow for biology at Cornell University. house gas emissions by modifications as more source and economic data came in.’”

Howard says that if sector. the EPA Subpart W inventories are too However, Marchese questions the low based on the faulty sensors and the validity of this approach. “We know agency is using that data as a basis for [GHGI] is based on years of estimates their emission reduction goals, “They without a lot of direct measurements…” might be using the wrong target to start Marchese says. “It’s a comparison to with. Their baseline number could be something that has a lot of uncertainty too low,” Howard says. He says his in it.” findings are important not only for Marchese says the GHGI is based methane emission measurements that on measurements taken over 20 years go to the EPA, but also present safety ago, that the EPA “tweaks” every year. risks at facilities that are using the “You really have to take the GHG Bacharach device to detect leaks. inventory with a grain of salt,” he says.

Howard’s research causes Howarth Like Howarth, Marchese is skeptito question the EPA regulations further. cal of the numbers coming out of the “How do you know it’s leaking if you’re EPA, specifically the leakage rates com-

ing from natural gas, the sector he is The proposed New Source Performance most familiar with. “The GHGI right Standards would avoid future emissions now, if you do the calculation, would from several types of new and modified suggest that there is an overall leakage equipment and processes (called “sources”). of 1.3 percent. I’m seeing almost .5 per- Estimating those avoided emissions cent from gathering and processing and involves several steps, including: · estimating emissions from each type of that’s only one step in the process.

When we add gathering and processing source covered by the proposed rule; · projecting industry growth, so we can to transmission and storage, distribuestimate what emissions would be from tion and production, I’d be shocked if new and modified sources we come in at 1.3 per- Courtesy Anthony Marchese without the rule; then cent. I think we’ll be · applying the coming in at a little requirements of the rule north of 2 percent,” to each type of source to Marchese says. estimate the reductions Howarth estimates a the rule would yield.

10 percent leakage rate.

In making these estiBut both scientists mates, EPA uses the best agree that despite available information. these discrepancies, the For this proposed rule, regulations still fall that included the U.S. short due to the fact GHG inventory and they would only apply EPA analyses, among to new infrastructure other information and don’t address leaks resources. and other emissions at EPA compiles the current facilities, tying Anthony Marchese, professor of mechanical engineering at U.S. GHG Inventory the estimated reducColorado State University Fort annually as a requiretions to production in Collins. ment under the United a time when the oil Nations Framework and gas industry is Convention on Climate Change. slow. “When we’re going gangbusters Substantial amounts of new information and drilling new wells, those new wells on the oil and gas sector have become are going to adhere to these new stanavailable recently and additional informadards, but if we don’t drill any new tion will become available in the coming wells there will be less changes, so it’s a little bit ironic there,” Marchese con- years from a number of channels, including EPA’s GHGRP, and research studies by cludes. government, academic, and industry Boulder Weekly made multiple researchers, and industry organizations. attempts (a phone call and nine emails) EPA will continue to refine its emission to speak with someone at the EPA to answer our questions about what specif- estimates to reflect the most robust and up to date information available. ic information was used to determine EPA will host a public hearing conmethane emission levels. We received cerning the proposed regulations at their the following statement via email as a Denver office on Sept. 23. response.

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Wildfires put the heat on Congress to fund fire suppression

by Sarah Haas

W

ith catastrophic wildfires blazing across the nation, Congress is pressured to address the runaway growth of fire suppression at the cost of other critical programs.

“This year, the United States Forest Service received $1.011 billion for wildfire suppression and as of August 10, we had spent $671 million,” says Jennifer Jones, public affairs specialist from the U.S. Forest Service (USFS) Washington Office says. “Given the fire activity we are currently experiencing and with weather and fuel conditions conducive to ignitions and wildfire spread to continue for the next several weeks, it won’t be surprising if we run out of money.”

The USFS budgets for wildfire suppression as a routine expense each year, but as climate change and new development in the wildland-urban interface raise the costs, the agency is asking to fund catastrophic wildfires as natural disasters that would tap emergency budgets.

Currently, the USFS is spending more than 50 percent of its overall budget to suppress the nation’s wildfires. A report released Aug. 5 estimates that within a decade, the agency will spend more than two-thirds of its budget to battle increasing fires. Once the agency uses its allotment for fire suppression, it must transfer funds internally, away from other mission-critical programs that can help prevent fires in the first

place, such as forest restoration and fire risk-reduction. No other natural disasters are funded this way.

Current fire conditions add urgency to the call to action for wildfire management reform. For the fifth time in 10 years, the National Multi-Agency Coordination Group (representatives from several federal agencies) raised the National Fire Preparedness Level to 5, the maximum. This year, 39,254 wildfires have burned nearly 6.4 million acres in the United States and that number is increasing.

Plus, the size and intensity of these fires have increased by 38 percent over a 10 year average, while the number of fires has remained steady. Prior to 1995, there was less than one large catastrophic fire in the U.S. per year. In the period between 1995 and 2014, there was an average of 9.8 per year. Despite this increase, there is a 17.5 percent drop in firefighting personnel as budget processes are increasingly insufficient.

“The worst 1 percent of fires are consuming 30 percent of the assets and we expect that to increase steadily.

Climate change has led to fire seasons that are now on average 78 days longer than a decade ago,” Jones says. ”We need more resources to accommodate these severe, long duration fires so we can manage fire, not react to them.”

With 79 large fires currently burning across 13 states, the severity of the problem is also a call to action.

“It’s unfortunate that it sometimes takes a catastrophe at home to get

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A firefighting plane flies over the 75,000-acre Canyon Creek Complex Fire in Canyon City, Oregon. Over 7.1 million acres have burned so far this year, the earliest the number of national acres burned has exceeded 7 million in the last 20 years.

Congress to act, but it’s impossible to see our friends and neighbors struggling because of a natural disaster and not want to do everything we can to help,” writes U.S. Rep. Jared Polis (D-Boulder) in an email to Boulder Weekly. “There are very real steps Congress can take to reduce wildfire damage, prevent future wildfires, and fix funding shortfalls in wildfire response, and when members of Congress know that there are homes and lives in their districts that can be saved if we act, that is a huge motivation to take action.”

Rep. Polis is a co-sponsor of one such bill, The Wildfire Prevention Act of 2015. Inspired by post-fire communities in Colorado, the bill aims to provide resources to reduce risk against future fires as well as post-fire related natural disasters such as flooding or watershed damage.

A second bill, The Wildfire Disaster Funding Act of 2015 presents an alternative approach to increasing fire suppression funds. Proposed as an amendment to the Balanced Budget and Emergency Deficit Control Act of 1985, it provides for adjustments to dis-

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cretionary spending to fund catastrophic wildfire suppression at 70 percent of its 10-year average. With the recent backing of the USFS, the bill is quickly gaining support with 127 co-sponsors, including Rep. Polis.

In the heat of the current fires in Washington state, Sen. Maria Cantwell (D-Washington) recently announced her intention to introduce another bill, the Wildfire Management Act of 2015 this fall. The bill extends beyond budget fixes to include six categories of reform including funding deficiency, fire mitigation, strategic management of fire as an essential part of Western ecosystems, strategic agency coordination, prioritization of federal spending and post fire response.

“I’m very pleased that Senator Cantwell is introducing her bill because it’s important that this issue get the attention it merits from both chambers of Congress. ...” Polis writes. “There’s no single correct strategy to address this problem, so I’m hopeful that having several thoughtful, bipartisan proposals in both the House and Senate will give us the momentum we need to pass a comprehensive solution.”

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FEDERAL JUDGE STOPS CLEAN WATER RULE IN 13 STATES

On Aug. 27, Chief District Judge Ralph R. Erickson for the District of North Dakota filed a preliminary injunction against the Waters of the United States (WOTUS) regulation under the Clean Water Act before it was to take effect on Aug. 28.

The EPA and U.S. Army Corps of Engineers issued a final ruling at the end of June 2015 to change the definition of WOTUS under the Clean Water Act to include streams and wetlands. The EPA states that roughly 117 million Americans get their drinking water from streams formally unprotected by the Clean Water Act. However, 13 states including Colorado, immediately filed lawsuit against the EPA, stating that the new WOTUS regulation is an overreach of federal authority, which Judge Erickson affirmed through his ruling.

Wikimedia Commons “The EPA cannot simply ignore state sovereignty as it continues to reach further into state affairs. Today (Aug. 27) the court agreed with Colorado and its fellow States that EPA likely overstepped its authority in trying to take control over state waters and, in doing so, poses a threat to state sovereignty. We will continue to vigorously defend Colorado from federal overreach,” said Colorado Attorney General Cynthia H. Coffman in a press release.

While WOTUS went into effect in 37 states as planned on Aug. 28, the injunction prevents the implementation of the new regulation in Colorado and other litigating states until the case can be heard in federal court.

“It’s disappointing that opponents of clean water would prefer legal maneuvers and confusion over clarity in the law, which benefits industry and conservation alike,” said Whit Fosburgh, president and CEO of the Theodore Roosevelt Conservation Partnership in a press release. “To ensure the health of one in three Americans, who get their drinking water from streams currently without protection, and the $646 billion outdoor economy driven by hunters, anglers, and others who rely on clean water, this rule must be allowed to move forward.”

HARMFUL ALGAE BLOOM PERSISTS IN THE PACIFIC

Throughout the summer scientists along the entire West Coast from Alaska to Southern California have been reporting abnormally large harmful algae blooms (HAB) due to above-average surface water temperatures in the Pacific Ocean. These blooms, also known as “red tides,” are especially concerning given the high concentration of the phytoplankton pseudo-nitzchia, a microalgae known to produce the neurotoxin domoic acid.

The National Centers for Coastal Ocean Science (NCCOS,) a program of the Courtesy NOAA National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA), reports that the current HAB event in the Pacific is causing the highest concentration of domoic acid observed in the last decade, which has caused the closure of many shellfish harvesting areas in Washington and Oregon, as well as some anchovy and sardine fisheries in California, to protect against amnesic shellfish poisoning (ASP). ASP can cause gastrointestinal problems, seizures and even permanent short-term memory loss in severe cases according to Washington Sate Department of Health. The high concentration of domoic acid is also causing seizures in sea lions and poisoning birds.

NOAA has committed additional scientists to research the algal bloom and granted $88,000 in Washington state alone to monitor and analyze the toxic pseudo-nitzchia in order to determine how long the event will persist this year and the likelihood of similar blooms in the future.

Boulder Weekly

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ADVENTURE

Courtesy of the Adventure Film Festival

MAKE YOUR OWN

LEGENDS The Adventure Film Festival takes over the Boulder Theater

by Michael J. Casey

The animated film A Line in the Sand is part of a braoder project called Our Canyon Lands, a conservation film series bringing awareness to public lands. The animation in A Line in the Sand is set to words by famous Western environmental writer Edward Abbey.

F

ilmmaking has always been an adventure. Whether it was Robert J. Flaherty trekking out to the arctic in Nanook of the North (1922), Werner Herzog pulling a 320-ton steamship over a Peruvian hill in Fitzcarraldo (1982) or Hubert Sauper building a lightweight plane to explore the remote corners of Southern Sudan in We Come As Friends (2015), filmmaking has always required, and captured, an adventurous spirit.

That spirit returns to the Boulder Theater, Sept. 12–13, for the 10th annual Adventure Film Festival.

With the tagline, “Make your own legends,” the Adventure Courtesy of the Adventure Film Festival Film Festival (AFF) boasts a line-up of 30 films of varying lengths, subjects, genres and mediums to give festivalgoers a taste of adventure, a sense of legends in the making and, hopefully, inspiration to go forth and create their own personal stories.

Of the 30 films featured at this year’s AFF, 24 of them are under 30 minutes. Bite-sized chunks for audiences to chew on while they are transported to far off places to meet people from all walks of life.

One of those adventurous spirits is already a legend in the making: the 14-year-old rock climber Kai Lighter, the subject of Colorado filmmaker George Knowles’s documentary, 14.c.

On the surface, Lighter is a dedicated student and a devoted climber. Lighter learns to climb indoors before moving outside to tackle the craggy rocks of Fayetteville, North Carolina’s surrounding area, which he does so with an impressive dominance. But For his film Every Runner Has a Reason, director Jordan deBree says he looked beyond Lighter’s skill as a climber is overshadowed by race. Lighter is Ronnie Goodman’s troubled past to examine the transformational power of running. black in a sport that is predominantly white. “[Lighter’s] story was introduced to me by Sarah Wood, who is one of the directors of the 5Point Film Festival (a festival based out of Carbondale, Colorado),” director George Knowles tells Boulder Weekly. “I started to do some research online and everything I found was very race driven, it was very, ‘What’s it like being the only African-American climber in the sport?’ ‘Tell me about the struggle?’ ...

Very ‘how hard it is’ and the challenges of this racial perspective.”

Knowles could see that there was more to the story than just Lighter’s race and used that to the benefit of 14.c.

“I didn’t think race should really be an issue, because that doesn’t have any impact in see FILM FESTIVAL Page 34

Boulder Weekly

September 3 , 2015 33

Massage is like water

Courtesy of the Adventure Film Festival

you need it more than you think

Kai Lighter may be an exceptional climber, but he’s also only 14 years old.

The film 14.c explores his talent and his relationship with his mother.

FILM FESTIVAL from Page 33

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terms of his talent,” Knowles continues.

And while Lighter’s talent is impressive, the real story Knowles found wasn’t between Lighter and the rock, but between a son and his mother.

Dr. Constance (Connie) Lighter, an associate professor in the Department of Management for Fayetteville State University, is a hard working single mother that makes sure her son maintains straight A’s before hitting the hills. “[Lighter is] definitely an intelligent kid, and a lot of that comes from Connie,” Knowles says.

As impressive as Lighter’s skills and talents are, it is important to remember that he is still 14 years old — Knowles isn’t planning a follow-up just yet, but if “the right story” comes along, Knowles is there.

George Knowles isn’t the only director coming to AFF with a project that sidesteps the predictable route. Jordan deBree’s Every Runner Has a Reason follows San Francisco-based runner Ronnie Goodman. Goodman is homeless and a recovering drug addict, neither of which deBree was interested in.

“For me, that’s the predictable route, talking about all of that. I think many people are fatigued by that,” deBree says. “If you talk about that, it’s hard to see the person behind that story, you just immediately make assumptions.

Not in a malicious way, or a careless way, it’s just human nature. You’re always looking for a shorthand solution to understand things.”

Instead of wallowing in Goodman’s past, deBree keeps the focus on the running and what that activity provides Goodman.

“I wanted to make something that tricked you,” deBree says. “The first 10 seconds felt like it was a slick, polished spot about a runner. The kind of thing we might make for a Nike [commercial], for instance. And then flip it on its head and surprise people.”

Equally surprising is how Goodman approaches running and how it improves and provides focus for his life.

“I think Ronnie’s story is a story of coming to terms with yourself and who you are, and finding peace,” deBree explains. “And he’s found that, in a lot of ways, through running. It kind of centers him and steers him away from all the demons that he otherwise would be vulnerable to.”

The director’s realization verbalizes AFF’s greatest offering: people using the spirit of adventure, the discipline of sport and the total hold of activity to advance themselves as people.

But no one does it alone, and Dominic Gill’s Comes With Baggage highlights the importance that a community plays when it comes to sports, and in this particular instance, bikepacking.

“The first bicycle explorers, back in the 1800s, had no choice but to go over all different types of terrain and horserutted, cart-rutted tracks,” Gill says.

“And funnily enough, a lot of the designs that [bicycle manufactures] come out with today — which we think of as cutting-edge bicycle and gear-carrying technology — was designed way back then.”

Gill’s “yearning to make a film about the history of bicycle adventure” led him to explore how bicycles were designed and adapted over time to the types of bikes that riders rely on today.

And while the technological advancements interest Gill, the heart of Comes With Baggage is not about the bike, but the bikers.

“I think the key is, there are all sorts of different cyclists out there, which the film sort of highlights, and the one thing that joins us all together is a sense of belonging, a sense of companionship and a sense of enjoying the road for whatever reason you choose to enjoy it,” Gill says. “However much we get into the nerdiness of cycle technology or getting the miles done, those things in our minds are secondary. The primary importance is having fun on the road with companions.”

Some of the adventures featured in this year’s AFF lineup are fun and Boulder Weekly

ADVENTURE enjoyable, others are simply necessary. ... By ignoring that, you’re ignoring That’s the line of thinking behind Justin these places that we go, that we seek out Clifton and Chris Cresci’s A Line in the this adventure.”

Sand, a call to action concerning Clifton’s comments cut right to the America’s canyon lands. heart of the matter: What exactly is an “[A Line in the Sand is] part of a adventure film, and what is the purpose broader project called Our Canyon of an adventure film festival?

Lands, a land conservation film series “The thing about ‘adventure film’ is bringing awareness to our public lands,” you can pigeonhole it, right?” Clifton Justin Clifton tells BW. “In their multiasks. “You can pigeonhole it and be like, ple-use designations, some of our most ‘Well, it’s not adventure if you’re not cherished public lands are under threat, hanging yourself off a cliff.’ Or a bike, and we need to stand up to protect or with a parachute, or, you know, them from inter- Courtesy of the Adventure Film Festival whatever it ests that don’t might be. But, I necessarily jive don’t think with the landadventure is that scape.” myopic.”

To bring “The stereoawareness and type of adventure drive his point is getting out across, Clifton and skiing, or cycling, or used animation climbing before and narration breakfast,” Gill from the words says, echoing of the great Clifton’s sentienvironmentalist The film Comes With Baggage is about the bikments.

Edward Abbey. ers, not the bikes.

“Beautiful Clifton’s shots that if travels to the Abbey archives in Tucson, Arizona, you’re into skiing you can watch it proved to be fruitful, but Clifton still with no real [plot],” Knowles says. couldn’t find the right words that would “But I guess, in my opinion, I would fit the time constraints of the short — a lean it more towards some sort of stoproblem that was solved when he hit rytelling.” upon the idea of crafting his own script “Everyone, every walk of life, by blending Abbey’s writings together every street corner has a person on into something that complimented the it that is having an adventure of animation. some kind,” Gill “We felt pretty continues. “I think a ON THE BILL: 11th Annual Adventure Film Festival. Sept. good about that knowmore accurate defi12 and 13, Noon, Boulder ing that Ed had always nition of the word Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030. said that he was pretty [adventure] is stepSaturday tickets $35, two-day derivative of Ed,” ping outside of your passes $55. For more information go to adventurefilm.

Clifton says chuckling. comfort zone. And org/boulder/ “As long as we stuck that might be takwith his words ing a different path throughout, we [knew than your father we] would have something pretty good.” took through life. Or it might be It is good, but A Line in the Sand is trying to get a job for the first more than just a call to action, it’s an time. It might be losing your job, important part of AFF because it or choosing to loose it and going reminds the audience that if there is no out on the life of the road.” untamed land to retreat to, there is no “I think it is hard to describe — to adventure. define adventure,” Knowles concludes.

“If you allow these wild places to be “Any number of things can be considoverrun by development, they’re no lon- ered ‘an adventure’ just depending on ger wild,” Clifton says. “And then where what story is being told, and the subare you going to adventure? Where does jects you are working with.” the adventure exist if we don’t say some Those subjects aren’t just crucial to places are better left alone to exist as the adventure film, but to the audience they are? that attends AFF as well.

“We don’t need to try to tame every“Maybe they can’t go to those places, thing,” Clifton continues. “In my opinor they can’t do those sports,” Clifton ion, you can’t have an adventure film muses. “But they certainly enjoy watchfestival — that has sort of basis in reali- ing.” ty — if you’re not talking about some of And from Sept. 12 to 13, they can the bigger issues surrounding our envicome together and watch it all in the darkronment, our planet and things like that. ened quiet of the Boulder Theater.

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UPCOMING...

Adventure Calendar

Monday, Sept 7 – Sunday, Sept 13 Join the Town of Lyons commemorate the 2013 flood, and celebrate two years of rebuilding Lyons Strong. The festivities include live music, happy hours and incredible food, a special ribbon-cutting celebration, and a community potluck BBQ, featuring special guest speakers.

Courtesy of Neptune Mountaineering via Facebook

Stevie Haston is a climber’s climber, embracing all forms of the sport. Haston is recognized in the climbing community for climbing bold, loose routes, as well as the first free ascent of the 1,000foot Titan via the Sundevil Chimney (5.13a), in Utah’s Fisher Towers. Come listen to Haston thrill with stories of his adventures on Thursday, Sept. 3 at Neptune Mountaineering.

Monday, September 7 Labor Day Cookout Oskar Blues Grill & Brew | 12:00 - 4:00pm Concert and tapping of VIVA LYONS brew Tuesday, September 8 Bluegrass Pick Oskar Blues Grill & Brew | 7:00pm Wednesday, September 9 Livin’ the Blue Dream Lawn Party River Bend | 6:00 - 8:00pm Cocktails & Lawn Games

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THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 3 Boulder Cycling Club Ride. 6 p.m. Avery Brewing Company, 4910 Nautilus Court, Boulder.

“No Summit Out of Sight” — with author Linda LeBlanc. 6:30 p.m.

Boulder Bookstore, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-447-2074.

50 Years of Climbing and Adventure with Stevie Haston. 8 p.m.

Neptune Mountaineering, 633 S. Broadway St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-499-8866.

“Rider the Wolf” Screening Oskar Blues Grill & Brew | 8:30pm Thursday, September 10 Oskar Blues & City Star’s 5-Course Beer Dinner The Fork | 6:00pm

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Friday, September 11 Happy Hour Benefit Spirit Hound Distillers | 4:00 - 7:00pm VIVA LYONS All-Star Bluegrass Band Oskar Blues Grill & Brew | 8:00pm Saturday, September 12 Lyons Fire Station II Open House 1250 CR 37e | 9:00am - 3:00pm Lyons Fire will celebrate the new opening with helicopters, live demonstrations, tours, and food from Oskar Blues.

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SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 6 Introduction to Mountain Biking. 8 a.m. Flatirons Vista, Boulder.

Hosted by REI. To register: www.rei.com/stores/boulder.html Colorado 14er Training Hike. 8 a.m. Bear Peak, Boulder. Hosted by REI. To register: www.rei.com/stores/boulder.html Introduction to Map and Compass Class. 8 a.m. South Mesa, Boulder.

Hosted by REI. To register: www.rei.com/stores/boulder.html

Clarifier Ribbon Cutting & Open House Mosaic Clarifier | 1:30 - 3:30pm Sounds of Lyons at Sandstone Park Sandstone Park | 3:30 - 6:00pm VIVA LYONS All-Star Funk Band Oskar Blues Grill & Brew | 8:00pm Sunday, September 13 Lyons Revival Community Potluck BBQ & Concert Planet Bluegrass | 3:00-8:00pm Sponsored by Planet Bluegrass, the Stone Cup, & the Lyons Community Foundation

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 5 American Heroes Run. 6 a.m. Rogers Grove Park, 220 S Hover Road, Longmont, 720-275-2197.

2015 Waneka Classic 5K. 6:45 a.m. Waneka Lake, Lafayette. To register, visit www.centaurustcc.org/events/waneka-classic/waneka-classic-registrationform.

Coal Creek Crossing Run. 7 a.m. Louisville Community Park, 955 Bella Vista Drive, Louisville, www.4allrunners.com.

Rocky Mountain Brew Runs. 10 a.m. Finkel & Garf, 5455 Spine Road, Boulder, 720-379-6042.

Bears in Our Backyard. 10 a.m. Mud Lake Open Space. Contact Larry Colbenson, 303-678-6214 or lcolbenson@bouldercounty.org.

Horseback Riding Through Mud Lake and Caribou Ranch. 10 a.m. Mud Lake Open Space. For more information, contact Pascale Fried, pfried@bouldercounty.org or 303-678-6201.

Hardrock Mining Tour. 10:30 a.m. Meet at Nederland Park-n-Ride. For more information, contact Sheryl Kippen, 303-776-8848 or skippen@bouldercounty.org.

Boulder Cycling Event Training Ride. 8 a.m. 3354 61st St., Boulder.

Training for a century, Ride the Rockies, MS 150, Ragbrai, or other big event?

Join for a “spirited” and extended ride.

Bicycle Village Boulder Saturday Group Ride. 9:30 a.m. Bicycle Village Boulder, 2100 28th St., Boulder. An all-levels, no-drop ride, typically 30-40 miles in length with a coffee break about halfway.

MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 7 Mechanics 101. 6 p.m. Community Cycles, 2805 Wilderness Place, Suite 1000, Boulder, 720-565-6019.

C MOSAI

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For more information on Lyons, upcoming activities and events, please visit our website.

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 8 Nature Detectives in the Field: Jumping Grasshoppers. 10 a.m.

Betasso Preserve. For more information, contact Deborah Price, 720-526-9154 or dprice@bouldercounty.org.

Boulder Beer Ride. 6 p.m. Boulder Beer, 2880 Wilderness Place, Boulder.

Best Local Fall Hikes. 6:30 p.m. REI, 1789 28th St., Boulder, 303-583-9970.

Pilgrim Wheels: Reflections of a Cyclist Crossing America — with author Neil Hanson. 7 p.m. Changes in Latitude Travel Store, 2525 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-786-8406.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 9 Open Space Bus Tour. 4 p.m. Bus departs from the Boulder County Fairgrounds. For more information, contact Tina Nielsen, tnielsen@bouldercounty.org.

To list your event, send information to: editorial@boulderweekly.com attn: “Adventure”

LYONSCOLORADO.COM 36 September 3, 2015

Boulder Weekly

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” ~Marcel Proust September 19 & 20, 2015 11:00 am to 5:00 pm Free, self-guided tour of artists’ studios in Gilpin County

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Boulder Weekly

September 3, 2015 37

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Boulder Weekly

buzz WE’VE GOT THE JAZZ Boulder may not be a well-known jazz hot spot,

but the local scene has more going for it than you might expect

by Sam Routhier

If

you want to become a movie star, you should move to Los Angeles. If you’re hoping to get your country music career off the ground, pack your bags for Nashville. But what if you want to be a jazz musician? New York? San Francisco?

What about Boulder?

Unbeknownst to some Boulderites, the county is home to a commuCourtesy of Nissi’s nity of jazz musicians and enthusiasts that might rank among the most serious in the country. The community extends through cultural spheres of academia and musicianship, from jazz studies programs at the University of Colorado to major jazz music festivals Renowned musican Nelson such as Boulder Rangell has played his monthly Arts and Jazz festigig at Nissi’s for the past six years. val and Jazz on 2nd Avenue in Niwot.

With a consistent output of music both live and recorded, Boulder County manages to maintain a community of musicians without what should be a Boulder Weekly

Courtesy of Annie Booth

crucial ingredient: a Boulder’s jazz combig-time jazz joint. munity. One such You’d be hard individual is pressed to find many Christine venues in Boulder Robertson, who runs County that could jazzinboulder.com. be considered trueRobertson grew up blue jazz clubs. Sure, around Boulder but there are copious didn’t become a jazz venues that host jazz enthusiast until she musicians, and there found herself are events that proimmersed in the jazz vide a setting remiscene in San niscent of a jazz Francisco. When Annie Booth’s debut album Wanderlust came out in 2014, and was club, but among she moved back to made with the aid of a grant from Pathways to Jazz. those opportunities Boulder a few years the community lacks ago, she started her a venue solely devoted to jazz musicians. website in an effort to connect with like-minded jazz This is an unfortunate truth, because among the lovers along the Front Range. It wasn’t long before community are a number of world-class jazz heavyRobertson says the website struck a chord in the comweights. Art Lande, Grammy-nominated pianist, is a munity.

Boulder resident. John Gunther, a saxophonist who is “I started doing this calendar, which from the very the director of the University of Colorado Boulder’s beginning has been a huge success, because it links Thompson Jazz Studies Program, is a local. Alongside musicians and the audience,” Robertson says. “There Gunther on the staff of the jazz program is Brad is a lot more jazz in Boulder than people realize. A lot Goode, an elite trumpet player who continues to play of people when they first get the calendar are surjazz music across the world, but gets his mail sent to prised at how much there is, or that there are venues Boulder. you wouldn’t think had jazz.”

Beyond that top tier is a sprawling landscape of musicians and jazz enthusiasts who breathe life into see JAZZ Page 40 September 3, 2015 39

buzz JAZZ from Page 39 Courtesy John Gunther

Robertson cites a wouldn’t have normally “It is kind of a means to an end, having musicians laundry list of venues in gone for. It’s a big thing record their music and letting them know somebody Boulder that either reguperforming, the aspect of believes in what they’re doing and wants to see this larly host jazz shows or the audience is huge.” music and see them succeed,” Goodroad says. “The have done so, including Booth is a bona fide ripple effect that will occur because of that — that Caffè Sole, the Laughing up-and-comer in the people will hear the music and be effected, maybe fall Goat, the St Julien Denver-Boulder jazz in love with jazz where they wouldn’t have normally Hotel, Nissi’s, Under the scene — she received the — it’s a farther reaching effect than just funding one Sun, Boulder Elks Lodge “Best in Denver” Jazz musician.” and License No. 1 (forMusic Award from Goodroad, who has a degree in music from the merly the Catacombs).

Westword this year on the University of Northern Colorado, sees the jazz comThe list goes on to heels of the 2014 release munity in Colorado as one that is both interactive and include various cafes, of her debut album, on the rise. resturants and concert Wanderlust. But if it “I think there is a lot of real talent in Colorado. halls all around the weren’t for a last minute We’ve got two universities, CU Boulder and the county. change of heart, Booth University of Northern Colorado, both have some treShe says that even might not even be playmendous faculty members that are really fostering though these are not ing jazz right now in the young talent in the area,” Goodroad says. “I think it’s jazz-specific venues, they Mountain Standard time a close community, it’s a tight-knit community. I do provide a stage for zone. think it’s a great community, and from what I see I jazz musicians to do “I was actually all set feel like it’s a growing community.” their thing. And that to go to grad school in Local musician Brad Goode is director of the LA at [the University of alone allows for an enviColorado Jazz Group and producer and performer in Southern California],” ronment when an audithe Jazz on 2nd Avenue festival. In the ’80s and ’90s For Jazz at the Dairy Presents: Welcome to the Jungle, Booth says. “I was comence commits its undihe cut his teeth as a full-time musician in Chicago John Gunther will be playing with the Carpe Diem Quartet at The Dairy on Sept. 4. mitted, and I even found vided attention to what before transitioning to work in the academic world, an apartment. I was ready first at the Cincinnati Conservatory before he moved is happening on stage. to go.

“It does happen in venues all over Boulder, where to Boulder in 2004 and became a member of the fac“Then I don’t know, something just kind of hit everyone in the room is just listening and there is this ulty in the Thompson Jazz Program. He sees potential me, and I realized I was maybe making a mistake by energy that’s happening between the musicians and in Boulder’s jazz scene, both in the musicians and in leaving Denver and never really giving myself a the audience,” Robertson says. “When the musicians the potential for some jazz-specific venues on the chance to be in Denver and see what the scene is like are feeling listened to and honored, it brings out horizon. here. I bailed on grad school, and I’m really glad I did something more.”

“I know there are a lot of jazz supporters in the What Robertson is describing is the idea of a “lisbecause in Denver I’ve community — I can clearCourtesy of Cara Blome Photography tening room,” where musicians play to a room that, ly see that from the type been able to grow for the most part, is completely silent. Although it of attendance we have at immensely in the past two isn’t quite as intense of an expectation as that of an our concerts at CU and at years and play gigs I never orchestral performance, where audiences hold in Jazz on 2nd Avenue,” thought I’d be able to play.” coughs for breaks between movements, it does lend Goode says. “I think Booth’s absence from itself to an air of importance for the music on stage Boulder could use some the scene in Los Angeles similar to that of a classical concert. real jazz venues, and I has certainly been In addition to putting together her calendar hope there are some peoColorado’s gain. In addionline, Robertson also hosts house jams, where she ple who would be willing tion to her accolades in the rents space at a venue, brings in a house band of jazz to do it correctly and give press, Booth also got assismusicians and creates a listening room style atmoa boost to the local scene.” tance in the recording of sphere. One of the jazz musicians at her most recent Goode wants to see an her album by way of a jam was Annie Booth, a native of Westminster and environment where musigrant from Pathways to graduate of CU, where she got a degree in jazz piano cians in Boulder can supJazz, a program founded by performance in 2011. port themselves through Alan Cogen and sponsored Booth considers herself to be based in Denver, performance, a scenario by the Boulder County where she had a residency with her trio at one of the similar to the one he Arts Alliance, which works Mile High City’s newest jazz clubs, Nocturne, and thrived within in Chicago to give Colorado jazz artcurrently is a part of the Tom Gershwin Quintet’s res- ists grants to record their Boulder jazz band Wellington Bullings plays Caffè Sole, years ago. His sentiment a venue known for its expansive jazz lineups. idency at the club. Booth echoes Robertson’s longing that jazz musicians find a music. for a listening room setting in Boulder, citing the difway to support themselves Booth was among the ference in settings at Nocturne during her initial resithrough their music is five artists who received the dency last spring. shared by John Gunther, who is entering his third first set of grants awarded by Pathways to Jazz — a “From night to night the audience would vary year as the director of CU’s Thompson Jazz Program. list that, according to the program’s administrative pretty drastically; sometimes it would be dead silent “You know musicians have to be entrepreneurs,” director Sarah Goodroad, has doubled this year to and everyone would be listening, and sometimes it Gunther says. “I think there are probably a lot of placinclude 11 musicians. Goodroad says the grants, would be so loud that we would kind of be backes that would be interested if they were approached by which vary in size and stipulation for each musician ground music,” Booth says. “That kind of affects the some musicians to see if they can have some live based on a plan that they submit to Pathways to Jazz, way you play, if you feel people are really listening or music.” represent more than just extra monetary support if you feel like they’re not I might go for things I Gunther and Goode both stress that while there musicians need to get their compositions recorded.

40 September 3, 2015

Boulder Weekly

buzz are opportunities available for musicians in the community, it is up to the musicians to hold themselves to a standard where they can be properly compensated for their talents. Gunther says jazz musicians in the community can pursue better opportunities for themselves by advocating to not play for free, instead seeking wages and situations that can contribute value to the musicians and their venue.

This fall, Gunther will be performing at the Dairy Center for the Arts with the Carpe Diem Quartet in the first in a series of “Jazz at the Dairy” concerts. Jim Bailey, the Dairy’s music producer, is another advocate of creating a listening atmosphere that promotes emphasis on the music.

“I want to establish a pure listening environment for the jazz musicians,” Bailey say. “There won’t be people that are talking, plates clanging and people in the kitchen — that won’t be going on.”

He continues to remark that the latter description, with background noise and other things going on, is a setting he’s encountered in venues in the area.

“I understand why that happens, it is a problem with venues, but a lot of the venues I’ve been in in Boulder and Denver, there is a significant amount of noise,” Bailey says. He acknowledges that for some musicians and audiences the relaxed atmosphere is ideal, but he thinks there should be opportunities for musicians to perform with an audience’s undivided attention.

But in the local jazz community extending to Denver, Bailey believes there is a level of musicianship and activity in the area rivaled by only a handful of locations in the American West.

“Denver, compared to other places around the country, has more going for it jazz-wise. You would certainly have to go all the way to Kansas City, if not Chicago, to find more going on in jazz,” Bailey says. “And then you’d have to go all the way to LA. There is more going on with jazz in Denver than anywhere else in the western half of the United States until you get to LA.” The thread that runs through the participants in the local jazz scene is a sense of community and pride in local jazz. Those close to jazz in Boulder believe the area is able to draw talented musicians at a level that is perhaps out of proportion with what could be expected.

“There are a lot of people who, given our size, if this was Iowa or something, they would have already moved to New York or Los Angeles or someplace with a bigger scene,” Robertson says.

“But because our quality of life is great Boulder Weekly

here, they stay. We have a very high level jazz community here, and many of those people play in Boulder.”

Gunther also stresses that around Boulder and Denver there are plenty of jazz artists across generations, regardless of the opportunities provided for live music.

“Boulder and Denver has a really strong community of both older musicians and younger musicians,” Gunther

says. “And I’m seeing over the years, you see it ebb and flow in terms of the number of places to play, but the quality of the musicianship here both with the older generations of musicians and younger is really exciting.”

With organizations, resources and venues keeping an eye on jazz in the community, it seems likely that jazz will only continue to grow and thrive in the unlikely home the genre has made in

Boulder. Residents may not all be privy to the scene, but there’s no question that we’ve got the jazz.

“The music itself is really in great hands with this new generation of young musicians from Boulder,” Goode says. “There are some really fantastic players here. I really hope Boulder can recognize that and support that and give them some venues to play in.”

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overtones Trust fall into the audience

Mary Lambert asks her fans to be present

by Amanda Moutinho

M

ON THE BILL: Mary Lambert. 1 p.m. Saturday, Sept. 5, Taste of Colorado, Civic Center Park, 101 W. 14th Avenue, Denver, 303295-6330.

usic has always been an to appease masses. decided to give her performance important part of Mary “It’s easier to accept yourself as career a chance. A few months later Lambert’s life. Her mom one or two dimensions — to say I’m a she got her first break with was a songwriter, and jock, or I’m dude so I don’t have feelMacklemore and Ryan Lewis’ “Same since she was 6 years old ings, or I’m the basic bitch,” she says.

Love.” Now instead of holding class, she can remember writing songs as a “I think we’re all born complex, but she’s singing songs and performing way to escape the harsh realities of we live in a culture that says if you poems, teaching lessons of self-love abuse she was living through. want to be loved you have to be easily and acceptance.

“It’s a blessing to have that lesson as digestible. I felt that way, sometimes, She’s come a long way from her past a child — here’s a coping mechanism that I had fit in some sort of box so — actively taking care of herself, having that isn’t harmful,” she says. “Here’s this someone would love me and people a strong support system and not hiding outlet that’s actually benefrom pain. And she Courtesy of Mary Lambert ficial and can be of good, encourages her fans to where you’re not internaldo the same. izing abuse. You’re not “When you go making it a cycle within through your life, be your own life. You’re putaware and feel every ting it into something that single thing,” she says. is cathartic and healing.

“If you need to grieve, I’m grateful that I learned allow yourself to grieve. how to do that really early If you’re going through on or else I don’t think I’d that break up, let yourbe alive.” self go through the Yet even with this break up. I think we’re helpful tool, Lambert conso quick to turn those tinued leading a destructhings off because tive life, eventually reachthey’re uncomfortable, ing a turning point when and they don’t feel she was 19. In the midst of good. Shit like that isn’t a manic episode, where she supposed to feel good. been awake and had taken But you can’t process it drugs for three consecutive and move beyond it days, she discovered an unless you’re present unfamiliar art form. with it. My music is “I hadn’t slept for 72 intended to help you be hours. I was at the end of present with whatever my rope,” she says. “It was you need to be present Lambert is unafraid to bare all in her music, openly talking about close to the second time I Mary with.” being overweight, bipolar, a lesbian and a survivor of abuse. had attempted suicide.

When attending one And I was going through of Lambert’s concerts, the rabbit hole. It was probably 7 a.m., would understand me. But I’ve been be prepared to do just that. While the off of one of my benders, when I stum- so fortunate in my life. I’ve been able singer has plenty of upbeat songs and bled on YouTube videos of poets doing to flourish all these aspects of my loves to crack jokes, Lambert is slam poetry. It shook something in me. identity. And I’ve been loved and unafraid to be vulnerable on stage and I felt awake. I knew that was something embraced for it.” conjure emotions in the crowd.

I wanted to do.”

She strives to create art with “I’m going to cry on stage. I’m with That night, Lambert wrote her first intention and avoid record label foryou. It’s kind of like group therapy. I poem, dissecting the duality of being a mulas that stem from fear and greed, always tell people, if you’re not comChristian and a lesbian. Poetry allowed she says. While party songs have their fortable with your feelings, then you Lambert to unabashedly say whatever place, that’s not the sort of work she shouldn’t go,” she says with a laugh. she wanted, without the technical or wants to make. In this way, Lambert is “For me it’s about connection, and rhythmic constraints of writing lyrics. helping to create positivity in the I’m so hungry for connection. And I’ve Never one to shy away from anything world. always been hungry for it. Every time I private, Lambert intimately explores all Back in school, she wanted to be do a show I feel like I have a family things personal — sexuality, body a politician, then chose teaching as that’s there. I feel safe. I feel like I can image, abuse, past sexual assualt, her the best outlet for change. But just as trust fall into an audience. And hopebipolar diagnosis and more. She isn’t Lambert was on track for grad school fully the audience can also feel safe with interested in diluting her reality down — application half completed — she me too.”

Boulder Weekly

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Boulder Weekly

arts & culture The power of discussion

A screening of ‘Transamerica’ offers a chance to ask and learn

by Caitlin Rockett

T

he “road trip” might be the ultimate American movie trope — the vast expanse of the continental United States providing a vivid backdrop while the confines of a vehicle pressure-cook characters in the comedy and drama they need to discover the intricacies of relationships with fellow travelers. There’s nothing but time across thousands of miles for hearts and minds to change as drastically as the landscape.

And so it is with Duncan Tucker’s 2005 film Transamerica: Reserved Californian Bree Osbourne

(Felicity Huffman) gets a call informing her that her runaway teenage son Toby (Kevin Zegers) has landed in a New York City jail and, after bailing him out, the two embark on a road trip from the Big Apple to Los Angeles, their relationship blossoming as the odometer ticks upward.

Except Bree is one week away from her male-tofemale sexual reassignment surgery and this is the first time she’s met 17-year-old Toby, who is unaware that this woman, masquerading as a Christian social worker, is actually his father.

While Transamerica may be clever word play, Bree’s gender identity isn’t the focus of the movie.

“It’s a human story in which the main character

happens to be transgender,” says Tucker, who wrote and directed the film. On Sept. 11, Tucker will join folks from local LGBTQ advocacy center Out Boulder for a screening of Transamerica and a post-screening Q&A at eTown Hall.

For Tucker, Transamerica was a chance to present a transgender individual in a positive light.

“I think all [marginalized identities] in film and literature are usually first portrayed as buffoons or comical characters, the object of jokes, like Stepin Fetchit in the early movies, or gay people as drag queens or silly hairdressers,” Tucker says. “Then they become visible enough and they seem to morph into being evil, like [Buffalo Bill in] Silence of the Lambs or [Gary in] Looking for Mr. Goodbar.”

The next wave of portrayals, Tucker says, come from good intentions. Victim narratives, like that of Brandon Teena, a 20-year-old trans man whose brutal murder in 1993 became the subject matter for the 1999 film Boys Don’t Cry, attempt to show compassion, but still result in a polarized image of transgender individuals.

“I wanted to skip past all of that and into a story that happens to be about family and connection and love and comedy that takes [the transgender aspect] for granted,” Tucker says.

“I was just so tired of everything being seen through a political lens.”

Which is not to say that Transamerica ignores “politics.”

The film successfully shakes a defiant fist at the notion that gender dysphoria is a mental illness, and it sensitively navigates strained yet loving parent/child relationships. However, whether intentional or not, viewers watch Bree succumb to a number of cisgender (a term for non-transgender people) notions of normalcy. In 2012, trans advocate and writer Stephen Ira critiqued a scene where Bree refers to “Stanley,” her birth name, and her therapist (a cisgender woman)

ON THE BILL: Transamerica. 5:30 p.m. VIP meet and greet with director Duncan Tucker.

7 p.m. screening, eTown Hall, 1535 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-443-8696. A Q&A with Out Boulder education and services manager Sarah Connell will follow the movie. VIP tickets $50, general admission $15.

tells her client not to speak in third person. Bree, after a pause, aquiesces. To Ira, the therapist’s request was an attempt to “moderate the way that the trans woman experiences her gendered self.” Ira and others also lamented Tucker’s choice to cast a cisgender woman in the role of Bree.

But in spite of the places where some may think Transamerica falls short, it never fails to open doors to more nuanced discussions.

Sara Connell, education and services manager at Out Boulder, will lead a Q&A after the screening on Sept. 11. For Connell, the movie is still relevant 10 years later for a number of reasons, not least of which is the current media blitz on high-profile transgender people such as Caitlyn Jenner and Laverne Cox. “There has been a lot of trans visibility recently, but it’s also been limited in scope,” Connell says. “People can only learn so much and absorb so much in a short period of time. I think people are starting to grapple with this language on a larger scale and what it means to be transgender. I think the next step is to show there are lots of ways to be transgender and it doesn’t mean that any of them is more right than another.”

As an activist and publically transgender woman, Connell opens discussions wherever she goes. When she visits businesses and schools to talk about transgender issues, she says she finds people want permission to make mistakes and ask questions.

“They know these issues are improtant but they don’t want to [address them] wrong,” she says. “What that means is they don’t do it at all. What we want from this event — and from Pride and as a larger piece in general — is to start conversations, to create outlets where people can ask questions, where people can grab materials.”

And while Connell is a vocal activist, the film reminds her that every day life is activism for every transgender individual.

“For me, that’s one of the takeaways: transgender people are being radical activists just by existing and being happy and pursing a life that matters — that is radical activism in and of itself in a world that says, ‘You can’t exist.’”

School Instrument Rentals!

Band Orchestra Folk Come in early for the best instrument selection.

3101 28th St, Tebo Plaza, Boulder Boulder Weekly

303.449.0516

hbwoodsongs.com

September 3, 2015 45

Thursday sepTember 10

hucci

w/ penThouse penThouse, GunksT & Lemon FuTure

Friday sepTember 11

Juno whaT?!

saTurday sepTember 12

mr. VeGas & Gappy ranks w/ apex Vibe & dJ chris miLLy

eVery Thursday @ The oTher side

Grass For ThaT ass

Free beFore 9pm or beFore 10pm For TexT messaGe subscribers!

9/10: pickin’ on deadphish & poLyToxic w/ The hoLLer! & The wiLd reeds bonFire & coLTon eLwood on The paTio 9/24: moreLand & arbuckLe & kiTchen dweLLers (LaTe seT) w/ raGGed union’s pickin’ on zeppeLin Friday sepTember 11

bLack uhuru

sunday sepTember 13

denVer baTTLe oF The bands

w/rasTasaurus, mindsTaTe, inna di red & seLecTa razJa seLasee & The FaFa FamiLy on The paTio

monday sepTember 14

saTurday sepTember 12

“cLearinG The enerGy oF cerVanTes”

FeaT sound heaLinG TechnoLoGy FeaTured arTisTs incLude dr. sTeVen schwarTz, Technoshaman & seTh snowden

wednesday sepTember 16

open your eyes hip hop ceLebraTion

FeaT wake seLF, T.r.u.T.h., dJ younG naTiVe, epic, diaLoGic process, niGhTwaLker, waLaTower massiVe & a speciaL surprise headLiner

Thursday sepTember 17

sTarkey & iLL-esha

danGermuFFin w/ worLd’s FinesT

sunday sepTember 13

meeTinG on The mounTain LiVe broadcasT FeaT The raiLspLiTTers, GranT Farm, benny “burLe” GaLLoway, reed FoehL & more

monday sepTember 14

iLLmacuLaTe & onLyone w/ myke boGan, GoLdini baGweLL & dJ spark (sandpeopLe)

Tuesday sepTember 15 sub.mission presenTs

eLecTronic Tuesday

saTurday & sunday sepTember 19-20

FeaT dam-Funk LiVe band w/ mike moses, 4Th worLd, crazy or noThinG, noFrendo & execuTiVe reaLiTy

w/ hopsin, dizzy wriGhT, Jarren benTon, dJ hoppa & more

wednesday sepTember 16

Funk VoLume 2015 Tour Friday sepTember 25

deserT dweLLers & kayLa scinTiLLa w/ eVe oLuTion & sixis

saTurday sepTember 26

curren$y

w/ reason The ciTizen, m.m.e., FuTure heroes, pLanes! & J-krupT

wednesday sepTember 30

mick Jenkins & sTwo

w/ myTh syzer, The mind & J sTock

Thursday ocTober 1

new proFession debuT show

rich robinson

Thursday sepTember 17

ben miLLer band

w/ Von sTomper & canyon coLLecTed danieLLe kaTzir on The paTio

Friday sepTember 18

euForQuesTra

FeaT dJ LoGic & maTT piTTs (The moTeT) w/ eric mcFadden Trio & eGi adam robinson & The Funky monks on The paTio

saTurday sepTember 19

eLiGh The crow

FeaT rhymesayers’ dem aTLas w/ rooke5 & doJah da don

sunday sepTember 20

aLex G

FeaT deLuxe, Los, mazzymaz, Jay deuce & sVcio

Tuesday sepTember 22

Friday & saTurday ocTober 2-3 duaL Venue!

eLecTronic Tuesday

sonic bLossom

FeaT mr. carmack, bLueTech, Turbo suiT, pumpkin, mr. biLL, Gibbz, marVeL years, cLozee, JanoVer & resunaTor, FiLasTine, eVan marc, The noisy Freaks, denGue denGue denGue, kLL smTh, sodown & kineTick GrooVe Vs homemade spaceship

Thursday ocTober 8

sub.mission presenTs

FeaT mumdance w/ subLiminaL & causTik

wednesday sepTember 23

spiriTuaL rez w/ michaeL GarFieLd

Friday sepTember 25

TumbLeweed wanderers saTurday sepTember 26

yamn

saVoy

w/ human aGency & home

Friday ocTober 9

Far side emporium

w/ decadon

oTT

w/ pLanTrae, souLacybin & Toybox

sunday sepTember 27

monday sepTember 28

cannibaL ox

saTurday ocTober 10

w/ Liam Tracy, sTay Tuned & no coasT company

FeaT pouya & The buFFeT boys, kirk kniGhT & bodeGa bamz

Tuesday sepTember 29

Friday ocTober 16

eLecTronic Tuesday

The underachieVers Tauk

w/ consider The source & The arTuro compLex

saTurday ocTober 17

Turkuaz

w/ The Quick & easy boys

Thursday ocTober 22

niGhTmares on wax saTurday ocTober 24

keLLer wiLiams Trio

FeaT rob wasserman & rodney hoLmes w/ cabineT

Friday noVember 6

The TraVeLin’ mccourys w/ wood & wire

saTurday noVember 7

sub.mission presenTs

FeaT midniGhT Tyrannosaurus + JuJu w/ swayd

wednesday sepTember 30

krs-one

w/ FLowaLiTion

Thursday ocTober 1

The maLLeT broThers & The LiL’ smokies

(TeLLuride band compeTiTion winners w/ paTrick LaTeLLa (whiTewaTer rambLe) & acousTic Fusion The Lonesome days on The paTio

sunday ocTober 4

caskey

w/ iTseVi, swizzy J & phiL mauro

Thursday ocTober 8

mounTain Jam

phuTureprimiTiVe

(TribuTe To The aLLman broThers)

Friday noVember 13

iron horse

w/ bass physics

biG k.r.i.T.

Friday ocTober 9

pLays besT oF pickin’ on

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46 September 3, 2015

Boulder Weekly

Courtesy of the Fox Theatre

BLACKALICIOUS.

9 p.m. Sunday, Sept. 6, Fox Theatre Boulder, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-447-0095.

SEE FULL EVENT LISTINGS ONLINE. To have an event considered for the calendar, send information to calendar@ boulderweekly.com.

Please be sure to include address, date, time and phone number associated with each event. The deadline for consideration is Thursday at noon the week prior to publication.

Boulder Weekly does not guarantee the publication of any event.

Thursday, September 3 Music Antonio Lopez. 7 p.m. Cafe Aion, 1235 Pennsylvania Ave., Boulder, 303-993-8131.

Big Swing Trio. 7:30 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 Northpark Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

Bill Smith. 10 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s Traditional Irish Pub, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Bluegrass Jam. 7 p.m. Front Range Brewing Company, 400 W. South Boulder Road, Lafayette, 303-339-0767.

Dave Honig’s Latin Quarter. 6 p.m. Cantina Laredo, 1680 29th St., Boulder, 303-444-2260.

David Booker. 5:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Homemade Liquids and Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Dexter Payne. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel and Spa, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

George Nelson Trio. 8 p.m. License No. 1, 2115 13th St., Boulder, 303-442-4344.

Idlewhile. 8 p.m. Jamestown Mercantile Cafe, 108 Main St., Jamestown, 303-442-5847.

Boulder Swing Collective. 9 p.m. Waterloo, 809 Main St., Louisville, 303-993-2094.

Inspire The Tree — Presented by St Vrain Theatre Company

Wonder

7:30 Tuesday, Sept. 8, Dickens Opera House, 300 Main St., Longmont, 720-297-6397.

Is it paranoia or some act of mystery? In The Tree, five teenagers embark on a hike when they come across a black and mangled tree. It isn’t until they recognize the same tree again and again, following them on their path, that the hikers begin to wonder. Come answer this question and more at the Dickens Opera House on Sept. 8. The Tree is St Vrain Theatre Company’s submission to the 2015 Colorado Community Theatre Coalition festival. Don’t miss your only opportunity to watch the show at a local venue.

Boulder Weekly

Moondance Film Festival Monday-Tuesday, Sept. 7-8.

Hotel Boulderado, 2115 13th St., Boulder, 303-442-4344.

Moondance Film Festival is a powerhouse film festival right in our backyard. Featuring work from around the world, the festival provides a platform for filmmakers, writers and composers to deliver varying perspectives on social issues. One highlight of this year’s festival is a sneak preview of The World is My Country about “World Citizen No. 1” Garry Davis.

Armed with a world passport, as a citizen of no nation, Davis was able to enforce real change globally, including helping to pass the UN’s Universal Declaration of Human Rights. The film features actor-turnedactivist Davis telling his own story, giving people an intimate look at his remarkable life in the wake of his death at 91 in 2013.

see EVENTS Page 48

Sway Flint Blade & Honeydew

Courtesy Flint Blade & Honeydew

9 p.m. Sunday, Sept.

6, The Laughing Goat Coffeehouse, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-4404628.

A clarinet and a Chapman Stick, a guitar/bass hybrid, might seem like an unlikely partnership. But when meshed together by Flint Blade and Alison “Honeydew” Murphy, the music produced is head-bopping good time. The sound is a bit psychedelic, kind of peaceful, yet ominous and a little edgy. The instruments complement each other well, allowing each to showcase the others’ strengths. Flint and Murphy have been playing music for years, and in 2013 they released their first self-produced, full-length album Love Light, and last year they released their EP Together. Along with their latest album …For a Moment in Time, released Aug. 24, Flint Blade and Honeydew will rock out the Laughing Goat on Sept. 6.

September 3, 2015 47

events

EVENTS from Page 47

Karl Werne. 8 p.m. Little Tree Acoustic House Concert Series, Lafayette, 303-661-0891.

Lady and The Gentlemen with Adam Burkett.

10 p.m. The Lazy Dog, 1346 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-3355.

North Boulder Underground. 5 p.m. Boulder Beer Company, 2880 Wilderness Place, Boulder, 303-444-8448.

Open Bluegrass Pick. 8:30 p.m. Under the Sun, 627 S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-927-6921.

Open Jam. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Pigeons Playing Ping Pong. 8:30 p.m. Fox Theatre Boulder, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303447-0095.

Selby Clyman Duo. 7:30 p.m. Por Wine House, 836 1/2 Main St., Louisville, 970-259-3555.

Zach Caruso, Hogan & Moss. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat Coffeehouse, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

SOCCER Friday, September 4 4:30 PM vs. Cincinnati

Sunday, September 6 1:00 PM vs. Iowa State

Prentup Field Adult Tickets $5 • Kids 12 & Under are FREE

Events Boulder Pollinator Appreciation Month Film Series. 6:30 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Cartel Land. 2 p.m. and 7 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Get Growing Garden Program. 11 a.m. WOW! Children’s Museum, 110 N. Harrison Ave., Lafayette, 303-604-2424.

GoDoh Story Club. 4 p.m. Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-4414390.

Lap Babies. 10:15 a.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303441-3120.

Love and Mercy. 4:30 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

FOOTBALL Saturday, September 12 12:00 PM vs. Massachusetts

Folsom Field Tickets starting at $25

SOCCER

Reading Buddies. 4:30 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Silent Disco. 12 p.m. Free Motion Dance Center, 2126 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-379-8299.

Story Club in Motion. 4 p.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-441-3120.

Toddler Time. 9:15 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Friday, September 4 Music Bonnie & Taylor Sims. 7 p.m. Skeye Brewing, 900 S. Hover St., Unit D, Longmont, 303-7747698.

Carbone Family Band. 8:30 p.m. Waterloo, 809 Main St., Louisville, 303-993-2094.

Sunday, September 13

Danny Shafer. 8 p.m. Liquid Mechanics Brewing Co., 297 N. Highway 287, Suite 100, Lafayette, 303-908-6036.

Prentup Field

David and Enion Tiller. 4:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Tasty Weasel Tap Room, 1800 Pike Road, Unit B, Longmont, 303-776-1914.

1:00 PM vs. Northwestern

Adult Tickets $5 • Kids 12 & Under are FREE

Denny Driscoll. 6 p.m. Sun Rose Cafe, 379 Main St., Longmont, 303-651-3533.

Electric Red. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

First Friday Jam. 6 p.m. Left Hand Brewing Company, 1265 Boston Ave., Longmont, 303-7720258.

Ginga. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel and Spa, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

48 September 3, 2015

arts Cecelia Feld

Alec Soth: Colorado Dispatch. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver, 720-8655000. Through Nov. 29.

Barbara Bosworth: Quiet Wonder. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver, 720-865-5000.

Through Sept. 20.

Collage. BMoCA at Macky, 285 University Ave., Boulder, 303-492-8423.

Through Nov. 15.

Explore the mishmashed world of collage through BMoCA’s new exhibit Painted Paper, now at Mackey through Nov. 15, including work like Cecelia Feld’s “#1261 Springtime Suite 3” (acrylic painting on paper with collage, 2012).

Photography

by Max Seigal.

Community Art Program Gallery, NCAR, 1850 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-497-1174.

Through Sept. 26.

PUSH.POP.KICK. Firehouse Art Center, 667, Fourth Ave., Longmont, 303-651-2787.

Flatlander.

Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art, 1750 13th St., Boulder, 303-443-2122. Through Sept. 13.

Sept Sept. 27.

In Bloom. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver, 720-865-5000. Through Oct. 11.

Revolt 1680/2180: Virgil Ortiz. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver, 720-865-5000. Through Jan. 10.

Gunther Gerzso: A Mexican Master. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver, 720-865-5000. Through Jan. 3.

Showing Off. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver, 720-865-5000. Through Jan. 3.

Mixed Media by Joanna Whitney. Community Art Program Gallery, NCAR, 1850 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-497-1174. Through Sept. 26.

The 4 Seasons of Veronica Read. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Parkway, Denver, 720-865-5000. Through Oct. 11.

Painted Paper Movements Through

Intuit. 10 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s Traditional Irish Pub, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Jenn Cleary. 6 p.m. Jamestown Mercantile Cafe, 108 Main St., Jamestown, 303-442-5847.

John Gunther and The Carpe Diem Quartet.

7:30 p.m. The Dairy Center for the Arts, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Keith Summers. 5 p.m. Pearl Street Pub, 1108 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-777-6768.

Kort McCumber. 8:30 p.m. The Roost, 526 Main St., Longmont, 303-827-3380.

Los Cheesies. 7 p.m. Oskar Blues CyclHOPS, 600 S. Airport Road, Longmont, 303-776-BIKE. Matt Easton and Academy. 10 p.m. The Lazy Dog, 1346 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-3355.

Members of Rapidgrass with Kyle James Hauser and Mark Morris. 9 p.m. Gold Hill Inn, 401 Main St., Boulder, 303-443-6461.

The Mighty Twisters. 8 p.m. The Tandoori Next Doori, 623 S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-543-7339.

NOBO First Friday Art Walk with Ancient Wild, Xerephine, Anei Birdlo. 6 p.m. The Secret Garden Boulder, 4715 N. Broadway Ave., Boulder, 303-997-7004.

Ramaya and The Troubadours. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat Coffeehouse, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

Rhythm Allstars. 5:30 p.m. and 8:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Homemade Liquids and Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Rowdy Shadehouse. 9 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-447-0095.

Run Boy Run. 8 p.m. Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303-823-6685.

Strangebyrds. 6 p.m. Upslope Brewing Company (Lee Hill), 1501 Lee Hill Road, Suite 20, Boulder, 508-873-9185.

Tap Into Transformation. 7 p.m. Viriditas Studio, 4939 N. Broadway, Unit 65, Boulder, 888-6128189.

Wash Park Funk Band. 8 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 Northpark Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

Wrong Side Right. 7:30 p.m. Por Wine House, 836 1/2 Main St., Louisville, 970-259-3555.

Events Anthony Grant: Living Color. All day. pARTiculars Art Gallery and Teaching Studio, 401 S. Public Road, Lafayette, 720-890-7888.

Cartel Land. 5:45 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Club de Literatura en Español. 4 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-4413100.

Fisher Honda-KIA Inc. Blood Drive. 9 a.m.

Fisher Honda-KIA, 6025 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-247-8444.

In The Line of Fire: Squirt Guns 2 Art. 7:30 p.m. Bread Works, 2644 N. Broadway, Boulder, 303-444-5667.

Late Summer Group Show: Grier Torrence, Chris Campbell and Others. All day. Fine Art Associates Boulder, 1949 Pearl St., Boulder, 303413-1000.

Longmont Studio Tour Preview Exhibition. 11 a.m. Longmont Council for the Arts, 356 Main St., Longmont, 303-678-7869. see EVENTS Page 50

Boulder Weekly

2015 -16 SEASON This world is but a canvas to our imagination. ~Henry David Thoreau

NEW SUBSCRIBERS: GET 50% OFF! SAVE 10% WITH CREATE-YOUR-OWN PACKAGES!

REFLECTIONS: THE SPIRIT OF BOULDER

Photo: Shelley Mosman

Opening Night

Sun., Sep. 13—7 PM at Macky Charles Wetherbee, violin Gabriela Montero, piano :RUNV E\ 5DYHO )XMLZDUD 5DFKPDQLQRÎ?

Photo: Sue Daniels

Photo: Laura Wilson

Josh Ritter

Sat., Oct. 10—7:30 PM at Macky Singer-songwriter Josh Ritter and the Royal City Band, accompanied by the Boulder Phil—a rare and special event

Photo: Glenn Ross Photo

The Nutcracker Ballet

)UL 6XQ 1RY DW 0DFN\ Boulder’s premier cultural tradition for the whole family!

Christmas with the Phil 6XQ 'HF Čƒ 30 %RXOGHU 0RQ 'HF Čƒ%HDYHU &UHHN 7XH 'HF Čƒ/RQH 7UHH

Photo: Molina Visuals

Photo: John Fielder

Portraits in Season

Sat., Nov. 14—7:30 PM at Macky w/ Boulder Chorale & Charles Denler, piano Works by Brahms & Denler w/ choreographed images by John Fielder

Photo: Keith Bobo

Dance, American Style

Sat., Jan. 16—7:30 PM at Macky w/ Boulder Ballet Works by Schuman, Bernstein & Copland

Photo: Glenn Ross Photo

Spheres of Influence

)UL )HE Čƒ 30 DW 0DFN\ Anne Akiko Meyers, violin Works by Mazzoli, Tchaikovsky, Mendelssohn & Shostakovich

Cirque de la Symphonie

6DW $SU Čƒ 30 DW 0DFN\ Acrobats perform to classical favorites

Bach’s St. Matthew Passion 6DW $SULO Čƒ 30 DW 0DFN\ 6XQ $SULO Čƒ 30 LQ 'HQYHU w/ Central City Opera, Boulder Bach Festival & CU Choruses

Voted ‘Best Classical Music’ in 2013, 2014 & 2015 by Boulder Weekly readers TICKETS FOR MASTERWORKS CONCERTS START AT $13; STUDENTS $5

::: %28/'(53+Ζ/ 25* Č? (;7

events EVENTS from Page 48

Love and Mercy. 3 p.m. and 8 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-4407826.

theater

Minecrafternoons at Meadows. 3:30 p.m.

Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-441-4390.

New Works by Hilario Gutierrez. All day.

Smithklein Gallery, 1116 Pearl St., Boulder, 303444-7200.

Permaculture Volunteer Project. 11 a.m. The Secret Garden Boulder, 4715 N. Broadway Ave., Boulder, 303-997-7004.

Teens, Trivia, and Tea. 4 p.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-441-3120.

Turbo Kid. 10:30 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Saturday, September 5 Music Adam and The Conundrum. 8 p.m. Liquid Mechanics Brewing Company, 297 N. U.S. Highway 287, Lafayette, 303-449-8623.

Amy Kress. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat Coffeehouse, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

Courtesy of Upstart Crow

Book of Mormon. Denver Performing Arts Complex, 1345 Champa St., Denver, 720-865-4239, Through Sept. 13.

Defending the Caveman. Denver Performing Arts Complex, 1345 Champa St., Denver, 720-865-4239, Through Sept. 13.

Guys and Dolls. Jester’s Dinner Theatre, 224 Main St., Longmont, 303-682-9980.

Through Oct. 11.

Upstart Crow tackles George Bernard Shaw’s Misalliance, playing at The Dairy through Sept. 12.

Mary Poppins. BDT Stage, 5501 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-449-6000. Through Sept. 5.

Matilda. Denver Performing Arts Complex, 1345 Champa St., Denver, 720-865-4239, Through Sept.

20.

Misalliance — presented by Upstart Crow Theatre Company. The Dairy Center for the Arts, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826. Through Sept. 12.

Snow White. Jester’s Dinner Theatre, 224 Main St., Longmont, 303-682-9980. Through Sept. 5.

The Aristocats. 7:30 p.m. Cannon Mine Coffee, 210 S. Public Road, Lafayette, 303-665-0625.

Danny Rankin. 8:30 p.m. The Roost, 526 Main St., Longmont, 303-827-3380.

Mindbender. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Dave Honig’s New Standards Project. 6 p.m.

Thai Shi House, 3033 28th St., Boulder, 303-4443133.

Old’s Cool Rock. 7:30 p.m. Bittersweet Cafe & Confections, 836 Main St., Louisville, 303-3175522.

Dueling Ukes. 6:30 p.m. Front Range Brewing Company, 400 W. South Boulder Road, Lafayette, 303-339-0767.

Radiate Unified Dance Party with DJ Mr. Getdowne. 8:30 p.m. Shine Restaurant & Gathering Place, 2027 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-0120.

El Javi. 5 p.m. Left Hand Brewing Company, 1265 Boston Ave., Longmont, 303-772-0258.

The Rick Jones Band. 5 p.m. Boulder Beer Company, 2880 Wilderness Place, Boulder, 303444-8448.

Permaculture Demonstration and Community Action Days. 11 a.m. The Secret Garden Boulder, 4715 N. Broadway Ave., Boulder, 303-997-7004.

Robinson Quintet. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel and Spa, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

Rocky Mountain STEAM Fest. All day. Boulder County Fairgrounds, 9595 Nelson Road, Longmont, 720-864-6460.

Foxfeather. 8 p.m. Samples World Bistro, 370 Main St., Longmont, 303-327-9318.

Gasoline Lollipops. 8 p.m. Jamestown Mercantile Cafe, 108 Main St., Jamestown, 303-4425847.

Happy Hour Jazz. 5:30 p.m. Tandoori Grill: Southside Bar, 619 S. Broadway, Boulder, 303543-7339.

Interstate Stash Express. 8 p.m. Longs Peak Pub and Taphopuse, 600 Longs Peak Ave., Longmont, 303-651-7886.

James Faulk. 10:30 a.m. The Stone Cup, 442 High St., Lyons, 303-823-2345.

Jami Lunde Duo. 3 p.m. Oskar Blues Tasty Weasel Tap Room, 1800 Pike Road, Unit B, Longmont, 303-776-1914.

Ken Keusenkothen. 6 p.m. Skeye Brewing, 900 S. Hover St., Unit D, Longmont, 303-774-7698.

Kerry Pastine and the Crime Scene Band.

8:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Homemade Liquids and Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-4859400.

The Kinda Brutal. 2 p.m. Stage Stop, 60 Main St., Rollinsville, 303-258-0649.

Kort McCumber. 7 p.m. Oskar Blues CyclHOPS, 600 S. Airport Road, Longmont, 303-776-BIKE. Kronen with Dykotomy. 10 p.m. The Lazy Dog, 1346 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-3355.

Labor Day Weekend Concerts. 3 p.m. The Secret Garden Boulder, 4715 N. Broadway Ave., Boulder, 303-997-7004.

Matt Flaherty Band. 10 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s Traditional Irish Pub, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303449-1922.

50 September 3, 2015

Stereo Clone. 8 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 Northpark Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

Tallgrass. 8 p.m. Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303-823-6685.

Tyler T. 7 p.m. Twisted Pine Brewery, 3201 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-786-9270.

Events Cartel Land. 5:45 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Love and Mercy. 3 p.m. and 8 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-4407826.

Lyons Red Rock Ramblers Square Dancing.

7:30 p.m. Lyons Elementary School, 338 High St., Lyons, 303-823-5215.

Mountain Murder Mysteries. 7 p.m. Gold Hill Inn, 401 Main St., Boulder, 303-443-6461.

Tinker Time. 10 a.m. Tinker Art Studio, 1300 Yellow Pine Ave., SuiteB, Boulder, 303-503-1902.

Turbo Kid. 10:30 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Yoga on the Plaza. 9 a.m. Twenty Ninth Street Mall, 1710 29th St., Boulder, 303-444-0722.

Sunday, September 6 Music

Ecstatic Dance. 10 a.m. Free Motion Dance Studio, 2126 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-379-8299.

Acoustic Jam. 3 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s Traditional Irish Pub, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Finkel and Garf Brew Run. 10 a.m. Finkel & Garf Brewing, 5455 Spine Road, Boulder, 720379-6042.

Acoustic New Family Dog. 10 p.m. Mountain Sun Pub, 1535 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-546-0886.

Hilario Gutierrez Lecture and Reception. 1 p.m. Smithklein Gallery, 1116 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-444-7200.

Horseback Ride. 10 a.m. Caribou Ranch Open Space, 1521 CR 126, Nederland, 303-678-6200.

IONS September Meeting Theme: Guidance.

10 a.m. Caritas Center, 5723 Arapahoe Ave., Suite 1A, Boulder, 303-449-3066.

Kahlil Gibran’s The Prophet. 12:30 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Louisville Art Association 30th National Fine Art Show and Sale. 10 a.m. Louisville Center for the Arts, 801 Grant Ave., Louisville, 303-6650955.

Blackalicious. 9 p.m. Fox Theatre Boulder, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-447-0095.

Bluegrass Pick. 12 p.m. Oskar Blues Homemade Liquids and Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Boulder Friends of Jazz Jam Session. 1 p.m.

Boulder Elks Lodge, 3975 28th St., Boulder, 303442-5003.

David Booker. 3 p.m. Oskar Blues Tasty Weasel Tap Room, 1800 Pike Road, Unit B, Longmont, 303-776-1914.

Elise Wunder. 4:30 p.m. Left Hand Brewing Company, 1265 Boston Ave., Longmont, 303-7720258.

Felonius Smith and Steve Sheldon. 2 p.m.

Dickens Opera House, 300 Main St., Longmont, 720-297-6397.

Boulder Weekly

events Flint Blade and Honeydew. 9 p.m. The Laughing Goat Coffeehouse, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303440-4628.

The Jauntee. 9:30 p.m. Southern Sun Pub & Brewery, 627 S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-5430886.

Dog Days of Summer Doggie Dip. 4 p.m.

LaMont Does Outdoor Pool, 500 S. Boulder Road, Lafayette, 303-665-0469.

The Delta Sonics. 6 p.m. Upslope Brewing Company (Flatiron Park), 1898 S. Flatiron Court, Boulder, 508-873-9185.

Jamie Lunde and Eben Grace. 6 p.m. Oskar Blues Homemade Liquids and Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Jon Stickley Trio with Andy Thorn. 10 p.m.

The Lazy Dog, 1346 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-4403355.

Gasoline Lollipops. 8:30 p.m. Waterloo, 809 Main St., Louisville, 303-993-2094.

Josh Elioseff, Greg Marmolejo. 9 a.m. The Stone Cup, 442 High St., Lyons, 303-823-2345.

Open Jovan. 6 p.m. Jamestown Mercantile Cafe, 108 Main St., Jamestown, 303-442-5847.

Louisville Art Association 30th National Fine Art Show and Sale. 10 a.m. Louisville Center for the Arts, 801 Grant Ave., Louisville, 303-6650955.

Kerry Pastine and the Crime Scene. 6 p.m.

Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303-823-6685.

Whiskey Autumn. 9 p.m. Pearl Street Pub, 1108 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-777-6768.

Labor Day Weekend Concerts. 3 p.m. The Secret Garden Boulder, 4715 N. Broadway Ave., Boulder, 303-997-7004.

BCCRN Free Film Series. 7 p.m. Adi Shiki Yoga Center, 6717 Valmont Road, Boulder, 720-2523962.

Left Hand Artist Group Showcase. 12 p.m.

Georgia Boys BBQ The Shack, 237 Collyer St., Longmont, 720-999-4099.

Events

Tuesday, September 8

The Oh Hello’s. 7:30 p.m. eTown Hall, 1535 Spruce St., Boulder, 303-443-8696.

Music

Open Jam. 8 p.m. The Lazy Dog, 1346 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-3355.

Bill McKay. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel and Spa, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

Open Mic. 7 p.m. The Speakeasy, 301 Main St., Longmont, 720-684-4728.

Bluegrass Pick. 8 p.m. Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303-823-6685.

see EVENTS Page 52

The Prairie Scholars: BBQ and Tunes. 12 p.m.

Georgia Boys BBQ The Shack, 237 Collyer St., Longmont, 720-999-4099.

Rayama Soskin. 11 a.m. The Post Brewing Company, 105 W. Emma St., Lafayette, 303-5932066.

Traditional Irish Session. 7 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s Traditional Irish Pub, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303449-1922.

Events An American in Paris. 1 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Go Club for Kids and Teens. 2 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-4413100.

Hawaiian Hula Classes. 5 p.m. The Dairy Center for the Arts, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-4479772.

Louisville Art Association 30th National Fine Art Show and Sale. 10 a.m. Louisville Center for the Arts, 801 Grant Ave., Louisville, 303-6650955.

Lyons Red Rock Ramblers Square Dancing.

2 p.m. Lyons Elementary School, 338 High St., Lyons, 303-823-5215.

Permaculture Demonstration and Community Action Days. 11 a.m. The Secret Garden Boulder, 4715 N. Broadway Ave., Boulder, 303-997-7004.

PhotoJAM. 7 p.m. Lyons Cinema and Photography Art Center, 442 High St., Suite 2, Lyons, 303-910-2236.

Rocky Mountain STEAM Fest. All day. Boulder County Fairgrounds, 9595 Nelson Road, Longmont, 720-864-6460.

Monday, September 7 Music Blues Jam. 7:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Homemade Liquids and Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Dead Phish Orchestra. 9 p.m. Owsley’s Golden Road, 1301 Broadway St., Boulder, 720-8498458.

Dotsero Jazz. 5:30 p.m. Prospect Park, 700 Tenacity Drive, Longmont, 303-459-5467.

Ernest James Zydeco, New Family Dog. 12 p.m. Gold Hill Inn, 401 Main St., Boulder, 303443-6461.

Hop Pickers. 5 p.m. Liquid Mechanics Brewing Co., 297 N. Highway 287, Suite 100, Lafayette, 303-908-6036.

Hot Pickers. 1 p.m. The Post Brewing Company, 105 W. Emma St., Lafayette, 303-593-2066.

I & The Many. 7 p.m. The Speakeasy, 301 Main St., Longmont, 720-684-4728.

Boulder Weekly

September 3, 2015 51

Recreational

events

words

& Medical

Courtesy of the Boulder Book Store

Thursday, Sept. 3 No Summit Out of Sight — Linda LeBlanc. 6:30 p.m.

Boulder Book Store, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-4472074.

GREAT NEW

Writer Robert Nordstrom. 7 p.m. Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1203 13th St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-495-3303.

STRAINS!

Monday, Sept. 4 “So, You’re a Poet” Open Poetry Reading. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

Tuesday, Sept. 8 Innisfree Weekly Open

Poetry Reading. 7 p.m.

Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1203 13th St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-495-3303.

Vienna — William S. Kirby.

7:30 p.m. Boulder Book Store, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303447-2074.

Wednesday, Sept. 9 Gutenberg’s Apprentice — Alix Christie. 7:30 p.m. Boulder Book Store, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-447-2074.

Writer Karla Jay. 7 p.m.

Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1203 13th St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-495-3303.

Linda LeBlanc talks about her new book No Summit Out of Sight, about being the youngest person to climb the seven tallest peaks on each of the seven continents, at the Boulder Book Store on Sept. 3.

EVENTS from Page 51

Open Mic. 8 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s Traditional Irish Pub, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Breakfast Club. 9 a.m. Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-441-4390.

Open Mic. 9 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Comedy Night. 7 p.m. Dickens Opera House, 300 Main St., Longmont, 720-297-6397.

Events

Cosmology and Modern Physics. 6 p.m.

Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Boulder Folders: Learn Origami. 6:30 p.m.

George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-441-3120.

NINA LEMON & THELONIOUS SKUNK Buds & Seeds on Sale now!

Boulder World Affairs Discussion Group. 10 a.m. Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-441-4390.

CU Engineering Blood Drive. All day. CU Engineering Center: DLC Collaboratory, 1045 Regent Drive, Boulder, 303-492-5071.

Folk Dancing on the Plaza. 7 p.m. Boulder Municipal Plaza, 1770 13th St., Boulder.

Lap Babies. 9:15 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Lap Babies. 10:15 a.m. Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-441-4390.

Mini Law School. 6 p.m. Wittemyer Courtroom, Wolf Law Building, University of Colorado, 2450 Kittredge Loop Drive, Boulder, 303-492-8047.

REC OPEN

Open Hack for Youth with Coder Dojo. 4 p.m.

Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

LATE!

September Brown Bag: Tiny Houses. 12 p.m.

Boulder County Courthouse Annex (Caribou Roo, Second Floor), 2045 13th St., Boulder, 303-4413930.

MON-SAT 9AM-10PM

Smokes and Jokes. 8 p.m. Johnny’s Cigar Bar, 1801 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-0884.

Wednesday, September 9 Music Blues Night. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Night Sun. 7 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 Northpark Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

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52 September 3, 2015

LONGMONT

REcreational Hours Mon-SAT 9-10pm Sun 10-6:45pm Medical Hours Daily 10-6:45pm 303.823.6422

Craft Story Club. 4 p.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303441-3120.

Cruisers and Crawlers. 9:15 a.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-4413100.

Google Analytics: Beyond the Basics. 6 p.m.

Boulder Digital Arts, 1600 Range St., Suite 100, Boulder, 303-800-4647.

How to Change the World. 7:30 p.m. Century Boulder, 1700 29th St., Boulder, 303-444-0583.

Louisville Art Association 30th National Fine Art Show and Sale. 4 p.m. Louisville Center for the Arts, 801 Grant Ave., Louisville, 303-6650955.

Midday Music. 12 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Pages and Paws. 3:45 p.m. Meadows Branch Library, 4800 Baseline Road, Boulder, 303-4414390.

Reading Buddies. 4:30 p.m. Boulder Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

The Rotary Club of Longmont St. Vrain. 7 a.m.

First Lutheran Church, 803 Third Ave., Longmont, 303-776-2704.

The Stanford Prison Experiment. 4:30 p.m.

The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Tinker Time for 5 and Under. 10 a.m. Tinker Art Studio, 1300 Yellow Pine Ave., Suite B, Boulder, 303-503-1902.

Open Mic Night. 6:30 p.m. Cannon Mine Coffee, 210 S. Public Road, Lafayette, 303-665-0625.

Toddler Lego Story Club. 10:15 a.m. George Reynolds Branch Library, 3595 Table Mesa Drive, Boulder, 303-441-3120.

Strangebyrds. 7 p.m. Rosalee’s Pizzeria, 461 Main St., Longmont, 303-485-5020.

Tom at the Farm. 7 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Events

University of Colorado at Boulder: Staff Council Blood Drive. 9 a.m. CU Rec Center, 1720 Pleasant St., Boulder 303-492-6880.

An American in Paris. 1 p.m. The Boedecker Theater, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-4407826.

Wednesday Fun Run. 6 p.m. Boulder Running Company, 28th Street and Pearl Street, Boulder, 800-807-6179.

Boulder Weekly

Tenth Anniversary of 9/11 Stephen Arney

A gunman invaded an Amish schoolhouse, held children hostage for hours, killed five of them and himself.

The Amish families of the dead took food to the gunman’s family in condolence — “You too have suffered loss” — then tore the schoolhouse down and turned the land into a field of grass.

What if the American families of the dead had taken food to the families of the hijackers to console them — “We are sorry for your loss” — and destroyed the Twin Towers utterly and plowed the ground into a field of grass left to grow until every drop of blood and shed tear were transformed into sweetest dew.

My Cat Saved the Life of a Bird Stephen Arney

We were downstairs in my office and she jumped on top of the cold woodstove then down in front to look through the glass, very intently, tail swishing, so I went over and looked in too and saw a wren, just back from the south, fluttering about in the firebox.

I took Chenowith upstairs then returned and opened my office window and removed the screen and pulled open the door on the stove, sat down, waited a minute until the wren hopped out

on the lip, paused then flew across the room and out the window into the sunshine.

After I cleaned last year’s nests out of the bird houses and put them back up, I sat in front of the house and watched my father’s ghost amble through the forest above the driveway. He didn’t see me — hasn’t seen me in forty-seven years.

He turned away and for the second time disappeared without saying good-bye.

Stephen Arney lives in Gold Hill, Colorado; his poems have appeared in Full Circle and the Bryant Literary Review.

Send poetry submissions of 250 words or fewer to poetry@boulderweekly.com.

Boulder Weekly

September 3, 2015 53

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screen Sorry, Malaysian tourism industry!

‘No Escape’ shows why travel is bad

by Ryan Syrek

N

o Escape feels like it was written by somebody who violently hates the entire Asian continent. Culled from every xenophobic stereotype, down to the eating of dogs, the film plays like a two-hour anti-tourism ad: “Malaysia, You’ll Probably Die Here.” Setting aside the copious and disquieting amount of fairly naked anti-Asian sentiment, No Escape could have been a fun throwback to ’80s action thrillers. Instead, writer Drew Dowdle and writer/director John Erick Dowdle spin a revolving door of different tones, one of them being “really, really, really dark and unsettling.”

When Jack (Owen Wilson) loses his company, he takes a job in Malaysia, and somehow his wife, Annie (Lake IMDB.com Bell), decides to support this mind-bogglingly awful decision and uproots their two small daughters. They aren’t there 24 hours before the whole country goes to spectacular shit. Rebels kill the prime minister and begin hunting down all foreigners as payback for their resources being exploited by governments overseas. The rest of the movie is Jack’s family in one long escape, despite the fact that the movie is called No Escape. It’s a It looks like Owen Wilson and Lake Bell are escap- lot like if they had named Snakes ing with children, but no. There is No Escape. on a Plane something like Good Thing There Are No Snakes on This Plane or Jurassic World was called Dinosaurs Are Totally Safe, You Guys.

The most thrilling scene has been shown in almost its entirely in the trailers, as Jack convinces Annie to jump from one building to another and then catch their daughters as he throws them over. It’s the only sequence that refrains from egregious “shaky cam” cinematography but, sadly, the view of the heights involved doesn’t allow the audience a break from vertigo. The rest of the action is fine, even sorta good at times. The whole thing is little more than a series of escalating “how do we get out of this room/building/street/country without someone catching us.”

And that could have been fun. But this movie hates fun. It should be called No Escapism. Instead of rejoicing in ridiculous near-death moments, the brothers Dowdle drop genuinely horrifying sequences that kill fun dead. Try to enjoy the vicarious thrill of Jack and his family slipping by a parade of rebels after you just watched those rebels hack women to pieces with a machete, attempt to rape Annie and execute the opposition by making them kneel in a line before an oncoming truck. It feels like one brother wanted to make a fun movie and the other wanted to make Apocalypse Now. How else do you explain a film in which Pierce Brosnan plays a boozing, whoring, grizzled spy with an Asian sidekick named “Kenny Rogers” but where Jack’s family also hides beneath the dead body of a slaughtered innocent man?

Honestly, the biggest takeaway is that Lake Bell is too good for this shit. Early on, she delivers one line of dialogue — “I’m sorry, I can’t comfort you right now.”

— with so much contempt, pain and love that it’s stunningly beautiful. So maybe the title was a message for her: “Sorry, Lake. No Escape.”

This review first appeared in The Reader of Omaha, Nebraska.

303.770.7660

Boulder Weekly

film Roundup of summer 2015 This was a fine season for film

by Michael J. Casey

W

hen it comes to cinema, there is no such thing as dilution. No matter how many times a franchise is rebooted, a classic remade or an individualistic work of art sequalized, cinema will always remain as singular and potent as those who make it.

Just don’t tell that to the handwringers and death criers who closed the books of summer 2015 only noting that some didn’t make as much as they should’ve (Me and Earl and the Dying Girl; Ant-Man) or mediocre ones that made too much (Jurassic World). And while summer 2015 grossed more than the summer of 2014 ($4.1 billion versus $4.05 billion) the wealth wasn’t spread around.

That’s missing the point entirely. Cinema is about what is available, not what is profitable, and as far as movie seasons go, the summer of 2015 was about as singular and potent as it gets.

None were more groundbreaking than the positively electric Tangerine.

Following two transgender prostitutes on Christmas Eve Day in LA, Tangerine depicts a marginalized society rarely seen on the big screen, and does it with life and laughter. Writing in the New York Times, Manohla Dargis deftly points out, “Unlike a lot of white directors ... Mr. Baker hasn’t simply looked in a mirror for his inspiration, but into that infinite world of possibility that is other people.”

Tangerine was made for peanuts, used real locations, non-professional actors and filmed with iPhones. Mad Max: Fury Road was none of those things, yet equally powerful. The Australian blockbuster took a barebones In The Look of Silence an Indonesian optician confronts the men responsible for killing his brother in the 1960 Hollywood plot and genocide. Its searing look into an ugly past is one of directly subverted it by unforgettable, and unshakable, moments in summer overthrowing the white male ruling class with the very women the regime sought to imprison. The result was a breath-taking, and gratifying, kick to the head that ought to change the course of future blockbusters.

As should Magic Mike XXL, a movie that places female pleasures at the heart (and genitals) of the matter. As The Dissolve’s Tasha Robinson pointed out, “It’s daringly inclusive about the women it puts onscreen, and daringly feminist in claiming that there are many ways to express masculinity simply by treating women well.”

Cobain: Montage of Heck, Love & Mercy and Straight Outta Compton all explore the creative process behind three of the 20th century’s loudest, most personal and, ultimately, political pieces of pop music. Amy focuses more on the artist than the art, but still hits every note and arranges them in a way that was both profound and deeply disturbing.

And the list goes on: 3½ Minutes; 10 Bullets; Call Me Lucky; Cartel Land; Cop Car; Grandma; The Look of Silence; The Nightmare; People, Places, Things; Phoenix; Queen of Earth; Shaun the Sheep Movie; The Tribe; etc. each serving a different audience, and each serving them well. And while none of these movies held a candle to the box office of Jurassic World or Minions — both grossing over $1 billion — the lack of a cohesive box office for these movies isn’t a negative; it’s a positive. Diverse cinema points to a more diverse audience, one that David Foster Wallace alluded to in his essay, “E Unibus Pluram: Television and U.S. Fiction”: “[P]eople tend to be extremely similar in their vulgar and prurient and dumb interests and wildly different in their refined and aesthetic and noble interests.”

There will always be dumb and vulgar and prurient interests in cinema, but in the summer of 2015, cinema found room for something more.

Boulder Weekly

THURSDAY SEPTEMBER 3

7:00 PM COLORADO SKIES: WEEKLY TOPICS 9:00 PM LASER: MICHAEL JACKSON

FRIDAY SEPTEMBER 4

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Boulder Weekly

cuisine review Susan France

Moxie Bread Co.

W

orlds collide in layers at the new Moxie Bread Company in Louisville.

Cut out all but the top display shelf at the entrance of the store and you’re in a patisserie somewhere in northwest France. There are fig and chocolate croissants, egg pastries and bubbling-over muffin crumbles. Each piece looks so ornate with so many variable ingredients that it’s a marvel to look at each one and wonder how.

These are serious pastries, but the reproduction of each many times over on the stack of trays behind the counter make them look effortless.

As you pull back to the bottom row, you see beautiful loaves of bread piled together like the smooth dark rocks on the shores of the Cote d’Azur. From left to right, there are loaves of ciabatta, Jewish rye, Algerian and Farmhouse breads. Behind the display sit several loaves of focaccia, baked with various herbs and vegetables and drizzled in olive oil.

And pull back once more to regard the shop and you’re suddenly in the idyllic American farmhouse. It so expertly effects a feeling of general, cultural nostalgia that it’s almost too romantic to be real. A used banjo and steel guitar hang on the walls next to the old, beige upright grand piano. On top of the piano are well-read books about French and Italian pastry and bread cooking. There’s an old 1950s white refrigerator with the steel pull handle in the corner, and the tables are made of smoothed wood and cut asym-

641 Main St., Louisville, 720-350-4710

Worlds collide

Moxie Bread Co. brings Old World pastries and breads to Boulder County

by Matt Cortina metrically. There are mish-mashed rocking chairs and the drapes are straight from someone’s grandmother’s house. The wood floors creak as you walk across squares of sunlight whose dimensions slowly change throughout the morning. The door is open and the charming bustle of downtown Louisville has never been displayed better.

On Friday nights, there is live music and pizza, but on a recent mid-morning, it was bluegrass on the speakers and a whole lot of pastries and breads.

First came a slice of focaccia with caramelized onions, olive oil, garlic and rosemary. It was served on a wood slab.

The bread was crispy and dense toward

the edge, and soft and moist near the middle, where the olive oil and onions huddled together. The olive oil was bright, aided by some salt, and the onions were subdued and worked wonderfully with the rosemary.

Also on the first plate was a “king egg.” It was essentially a small popover filled with cheese, pepper, scrambled egg and herbs. It’s like a French breakfast sandwich if the French ever bucked up and embraced American breakfast inventions. There was a joke made of its calorie count at the counter, but if you’re ordering this, you’re not concerned about its health attributes — you’re looking to have an awesome start to your day.

Next was a pastrami and manchego cheese sandwich on a bialy — a polish roll that’s sort of like a cross between an everything bagel and a Kaiser roll. The pastrami was cut into long strips, like bacon, and it was a fresher, lighter take on the deli standard.

The tomatoes on this thing were robust, and the arugula and olive oil balanced the whole thing out.

Manchego is also the perfect cheese for cured meats as its sharp and the slightest bit funky, but ultimately amenable to salty, powerful meat. It was a phenomenal sandwich.

Then there were pastries.

There was the house specialty, kouign-amman, a pastry typical of Bretagne, France, and whose name translates to butter cake in the old Breton dialect. Mine was filled with nutty, moist fig and the relatively dense layers of the small pastry made it exceptional to eat with a hot cup of coffee. The other pastry was the peach Bretagne, essentially a golden brown cook’s hat of a treat that had the consistency of a dense croissant. Mine was filled with Palisade peaches and ginger, and I could’ve eaten a ton of those things.

Most exciting, and what I think has inspired Moxie to make immediate regulars of dozens of people, is the price. Pastries and breads are mostly available for less than $5. It’s what would typically be considered a high-end Euro-style bakery in the U.S., turned casual and authentic. It has made accessible to Boulder County eaters some really high-quality food.

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Boulder Weekly

Food happenings

tidbites

around Boulder County

STARTING OUT ON BURGUNDY

sommeliers (Zimmerman, Jay Fletcher and Sean Razee) will lead an old and rare Burgundy seminar, which features wines from the ’70s, ’80s and ’90s. That’ll run you $295.

Then, throughout the weekend, you’ll find dinners and tastings at PMG Wine Bar, Frasca, St Julien and Flagstaff House. Tickets

The distribution of the straight malt whisky was delayed about six months as the distillery cleaned up from the damage caused by the 2013 flood.

“Two years ago when our town got hit by the flood and our distillery was under 3 feet of water,” said Craig Engelhorn, head distiller and co-founder, “I was worried this whole thing might go down the drain. To finally be releasing this whisky and have it turn out so well, it’s very satisfying for us.”

The whisky features “aromas of oak and toffee,” with flavors of “caramel, turbinado sugar and light smoke.”

“My goal with the peat level,” Engelhorn notes, “was for it to be approachable enough for newbie whisky drinkers, but present enough to satisfy single malt scotch drinkers.”

Only five 53-gallon barrels were bottled, so head out quick for a tasting.

Tickets for the fifth annual Boulder Burgundy Festival, which returns in October and celebrates the illustrious wines of the central French Spirit Hound DIstillers region, went on sale this week.

The festival is put on by Boulder Wine Merchant and celebrated at restaurants across town over the course of four days. “[It] is impossible not to love the spectacular wines of Burgundy,” said master sommelier and Boulder Wine Merchant owner Brett Zimmerman in a press release. “The greatest tragedy of loving these wines is not tasting the great ones often enough.

Selfishly, we thought hosting a Burgundy Festival would be the FISH TIME perfect opportunity to celebrate the wines of the region by tastSpirit Hound Distillers in Lyons released their flagship straight malt whisky last Bradford Heap, the chef week. ing and sharing them with some and owner of Colterra and of our friends, customers, restauSalt, is set to open his new searateurs, suppliers and producfood restaurant, Wild Standard, on Sept. 14 are available on a per event basis, and you ers.” on Pearl Street. can purchase them and find more informaThe celebration includes tastings and The new restaurant is located next to Salt seminars led by some of the best wine direc- tion at www.boulderburgundyfestival.com. in the space previously occupied by tors in the country, and dinners from PastaVino. It’s split on two levels, with about Boulder’s top chefs.

100 seating capacity upstairs and 30 downThe festival starts with a champagne and THE HARDER STUFF stairs. The restaurant will also provide an caviar party on Thursday, Oct. 22 from 5-7:30 atypical format — small dishes ranging from p.m. at CU’s Koenig Alumni Building. On Spirit Hound Distillers in Lyons released its a couple bucks to $10 will be carried around Friday, OAK hosts a “best value Burgundy” flagship product last week, a straight malt on carts and trays so patrons can grab what wine lunch at 11:30 a.m. for $95. whisky aged three years in new, charred they like.

On Friday from 1-2:30 p.m., three master American oak barrels.

Boulder Weekly

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cuisine

Courtesy of Boulder County Farmers’ Markets

I

t’s good to be able to drive a hard bargain; when buying a used snowboard on Ebay, for example, or attempting to stay out of a corrupt policeman’s car in some foreign city, with only $50 in your pocket. On such occasions, one should negotiate with all of the cunning one can muster.

But at the farmers’ market, the dogged pursuit of a bargain is usually poor form.

This isn’t some South American open-air market, where out-of-town shoppers can expect an exorbitant gringo tax, which demands a certain amount of bargaining for the sake of dignity. Nor is this the cheerful theater of price discovery the guidebook prepared you for, where the locals engage in lively bargaining as a form of social interaction, and you can engage with the locals this way too, through the universal language of shopping.

Even in places where it is socially acceptable, I have a hard time sparring over money with those who have turned the earth into food, for my nourishment, with their bare hands.

This isn’t to say that there is no room for dealmaking at the farmers’ market, because there most definitely is. But it’s a more nuanced kind of negotiating. How gracefully you can participate in this dance depends on how sincerely you attempt to understand, and empathize with, the situation from the farmer’s perspective.

Farming straddles a sharp edge between labor of love and slave labor. Even in the rare cases where the farmer makes a decent living, he or she still works ungodly hours, in the heat, cold, rain and in the most generally random, inconvenient of circumstances.

Unexpected catastrophes, fickle markets, and changing weather patterns are part of this difficult package.

The stakes are higher than ever this summer in my corner of the northern Rockies. The heat came early, shattering records during the summer solstice. The

Boulder Weekly

Beg, borrow and steal

How and how not to bargain at the farmers’ market

by Ari LeVaux

long days allowed the heat to cause even more damage than it would have later in the summer, when days are shorter and the plants are better established. Some crops bolted, while others were stunted. Keeping everything wet enough became a consuming, expensive challenge. At market, the trick became keeping the fragile crops perky in the merciless heat.

In the rivers around my valley, water temperatures are pushing the limits of what the trout can tolerate.

Anglers are cautioned not to fish in the afternoon,

when the fish are especially fragile. Farmers, like their produce, are fragile, too, especially by the end of the market. Don’t be that guy who tries to save a little beer money by pointing out how wilted the veggies are. Instead, be the altruistic negotiator who looks for ways to make it better for everyone.

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to the low places of opportunity. My flow took me to the dairy stand, where Ernie had extra gallons of milk because the steamer on the espresso stand next door was broken. He offered me a good price, and offered to keep the milk cool until I was ready to leave the market. Deal.

On to the next.

Mike was packing up his stand, even though the market didn’t close for another hour. “I’m sold out,” he said. Not completely, he qualified, but close enough to pack it in.

“I’m not gonna sit here in this heat just to sell some salad mix and carrots for ten bucks,” he told me. “I’m gonna go drink a beer.”

“Can I pay for your beer,” I offered, “in exchange for some salad mix and carrots?”

I held out my basket and he loaded it up Susan France with what felt fair. For five bucks I got a pile of carrots, a large green tomato, a handful of zucchini and three bags of salad mix that Mike had impressively managed to keep fresh.

Across the aisle, a farmer named Steve was surrounded by mountains of produce as the clock ticked down. At least he had a good shade system, so his stuff was faring as well as it could. The heat had given Steve an early crop of eggplant, usually unheard of at this time of year, and he had a big box of it. But I was drawn in by his 8-ball summer squash, of which I had grown fond while living in New Mexico, where they are called calabacitas.

“You like these? I’ll give you a screaming deal on a whole box,” Steve said, as he pulled a box from beneath a table. It was packed with Don’t be afraid to ask if a deal can those round, green/gray zucchini-like vegetabe made. bles.

I thought about those squash, and those eggplants, realizing that if I only had some tomatoes, then I could make and freeze a large batch of ratatouille. I told Steve I was interested in the calabacitas, as well as the eggplant, but I had to go see if I could find some tomatoes.

“Good luck with that,” Steve said. He, along with Mike, and most everyone else, had sold out of tomatoes early. A lap around the market confirmed it. I returned to Steve’s stand, sans tomatoes and thinking about a Plan B, just in time to see Ernie walk off with all of Steve’s eggplant in exchange for a block of cheese.

So now it was on to Plan C. I made a plan to blanch and freeze those calabacitas until I can get enough tomatoes and eggplant together to make my ratatouille.

Steve threw some extra goodies into the deal, including kale, cucumbers and even some eggplant that Ernie left behind.

For about $25, I killed it at that market, bringing home a gallon of fresh, organic milk, plus significant quantities of carrots, salad mix, kale, eggplants and cucumbers. And all of this bounty was practically icing on the cake of 20 quartsized freezer bags stuffed full of calabacitas, ready for cooking, that I ended up with. I blanched them for three minutes, then shocked in ice water, before packaging them up.

In addition to that ratatouille, come winter I’ll be ready to make a Southwestern corn stew called posole, to which I always add calabacitas when available. And thanks to my altruistic negotiating skills, they will be.

Boulder Weekly

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drink Sunset sipping

Cocktails to see summer out

by Noel Phillips

UPCOMING SHOWS

T

he heat seems to be breaking. Mosquitoes and ticks have mostly succumbed to their well-deserved deaths. Nights are still long, but a hint of coolness touches the edges. Summer is winding down. At this point, that mojito is perhaps not as refreshing as at the start of summer; or maybe mint juleps just aren’t cutting it anymore, and the thought of yet another margarita turns the stomach. As the summer progresses, and our imbibing continues — there is, after all, still plenty of evening to sit on the porch with friends — it’s easy to get a bit bored with the familiar go-tos, even if they’ve been creatively altered. Blueberry mojito? Been there. Pineapple margarita? Had way too many.

In spite of the disinterest in the tried and true summer beverages that we dream of all winter long and now Wikimedia Commons can’t stomach, the end of summer doesn’t have to signal the end of summer libations. It’s just time to shake things up a bit, and venture into new realms with some late season cocktails.

Fruit has finally ripened and can be found in a dazzling colorful array across farmers’ market stands. Take advantage of what is in season by looking for drinks that tie in with those market buys. A Bitter Peach made with bitters, egg whites and peach syrup, or a Grilled Peach cocktail featuring muddled grilled peach and a spicy bourbon take advantage of the current abundance of this golden fruit. Blackberries, also in season, are on display in drinks such as The Bitter Bar’s Black Forest, which combines the dark berries with bourbon, lillet rouge and fresh lemon.

End the summer with drink variations that match the season.

But if peaches and berries are sweeter than what the taste buds desire this time of year, a roasted fig cocktail may be the perfect drink to bridge the summer-autumn gap. Look to cocktails such as the Portuguese Fig made with rum, port and roasted fig.

For those with more floral inclinations, lavender additions imbibe any cocktail with a late summer feel. With each sip of OAK’s The French Hare, one is transported to the endless lavender fields of Provence. The Monk’s Garden, laced with lavender, herb-infused vodka, cucumber and lime, also featured on OAK’s cocktail menu, offers the drinker a chance to stroll the ancient herb gardens of an old European abbey.

It is not unusual this time of year, however, for the mind to drift away from summer fruits to thoughts of campfires and cooler nights. Cocktails utilizing the smoky qualities of mezcal, such as The Bitter Bar’s Taproot, or Zolo Grill’s aptly named, Campfire, with its smoked salt rim, bring to mind starry nights around the fire.

If drinking smoke doesn’t appeal, cocktails using whiskeys keep drinking creative and light, in the still hot summer temperatures, especially when combined with herbal bitters. The spicy, warm qualities of these cocktails bring autumn to mind, without overheating the body.

With the creative energy of Boulder bartenders doing their best to keep up with the seasons, there’s no reason to drink the ordinary. And for those with their own creative bent, what better time of year to experiment with all the gardens are providing. And it’s unlikely friends and guests will turn down the chance to be your guinea pigs. Cheers to the summer’s end!

Boulder Weekly

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ARIES

MARCH 21-APRIL 19:

astrology Go to RealAstrology.com to check out

ambivalence, banish ghosts that are more trouble than they are worth. 2. Identify the one bad habit you most want to dissolve, and replace it with a good habit. 3. Forgive everyone, including yourself. 4.

Play a joke on your fear.

5. Discard or give away material objects that no

“Excess is the common Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO substitute for energy,” HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE said poet Marianne HOROSCOPES. The audio horoscopes Moore. That’s a problem are also available by phone at 1-877you should watch out 873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700. for in the coming weeks.

According to my astrological projections, you’re a bit less lively and dynamic than usual. And you may be longer have any meaning or use. tempted to compensate by engaging in extreme behavior or resorting to a contrived show of force. Please don’t! A better SCORPIO strategy would be to recharge your power. Lay low and take OCT. 23-NOV. 21: extra good care of yourself. Get high-quality food, sleep, I hope you’re not getting bored with all of the good news entertainment, art, love and relaxation.

I have been delivering in recent weeks. I’m sorry if I sound like I’m sugarcoating or whitewashing, but I swear I’m simTAURUS ply reporting the truth about the cosmic omens. Your karma APRIL 20-MAY 20 is extra sweet these days. You do have a few obstacles, but For a pregnant woman, the fetus often begins to move for they are weaker than usual. So I’m afraid you will have to the first time during the fifth month of gestation. The sentolerate my rosy prophecies for a while longer. Stop reading sation may resemble popcorn popping or a butterfly flutternow if you can’t bear to receive a few more buoyant beams. ing. It’s small but dramatic: the distinct evidence that a live This is your last warning! Your web of allies is getting more creature is growing inside her. Even if you are not literally resilient and interesting. You’re expressing just the right mix expecting a baby, and even if you are male, I suspect you will of wise selfishness and enlightened helpfulness. As your soon feel the metaphorical equivalent of a fetus’s first kicks. influence increases, you are becoming even more responsible You’re not ready to give birth yet, of course, but you are well about wielding it. on your way to generating a new creation.

GEMINI

MAY 21-JUNE 20:

“Since U Been Gone” is a pop song recorded by vocalist Kelly Clarkson. She won a Grammy for it, and made a lot of money from its sales. But two other singers turned down the chance to make it their own before Clarkson got her shot. The people who wrote the tune offered it first to Pink and then to Hillary Duff, but neither accepted. Don’t be like those two singers, Gemini. Be like Clarkson. Recognize opportunities when they are presented to you, even if they are in disguise or partially cloaked.

CANCER

JUNE 21-JULY 22:

“Going with the flow” sounds easy and relaxing, but here’s another side of the truth: Sometimes it can kick your ass.

The rippling current you’re floating on may swell up into a boisterous wave. The surge of the stream might get so hard and fast that your ride becomes more spirited than you anticipated. And yet I still think that going with the flow is your best strategy in the coming weeks. It will eventually deliver you to where you need to go, even if there are bouncy surprises along the way.

LEO

JULY 23-AUG. 22:

“Money doesn’t make you happy,” said movie star and ex-California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger. “I now have $50 million, but I was just as happy when I had $48 million.” Despite his avowal, I’m guessing that extra money would indeed make you at least somewhat happier. And the good news is that the coming months will be prime time for you to boost your economic fortunes. Your ability to attract good financial luck will be greater than usual, and it will zoom even higher if you focus on getting better educated and organized about how to bring more wealth your way.

VIRGO

AUG. 23-SEPT. 22:

“I stand up next to a mountain, and I chop it down with the edge of my hand.” So sang Jimi Hendrix in his raucous psychedelic tune “Voodoo Child (Slight Return).” We could view his statement as an example of delusional grandiosity, and dismiss it as meaningless. Or we could say it’s a funny and brash boast that Hendrix made as he imagined himself to be a mythic hero capable of unlikely feats. For the purposes of this horoscope, let’s go with the latter interpretation. I encourage you to dream up a slew of extravagant brags about the outlandish magic powers you have at your disposal. I bet it will rouse hidden reserves of energy that will enhance your more practical powers.

LIBRA

SEPT. 23-OCT. 22:

It’s the phase of your cycle when you have maximum power to transform yourself. If you work hard to rectify and purify your inner life, you will be able to generate a transcendent release. Moreover, you may tap into previously dormant or inaccessible aspects of your soul’s code. Here are some tips on how to fully activate this magic. 1. Without any

Boulder Weekly

SAGITTARIUS NOV. 22-DEC. 21:

When 16th-century Spanish invaders arrived in the land of the Mayans, they found a civilization that was in many ways highly advanced. The native people had a superior medical system and calendar. They built impressive cities with sophisticated architecture and paved roads. They were prolific artists, and had a profound understanding of mathematics and astronomy. And yet they did not make or use wheeled vehicles, which had been common in much of the rest of the world for over 2,000 years. I see a certain similarity between this odd disjunction and your life. Although you’re mostly competent and authoritative, you are neglecting to employ a certain resource that would enhance your competence and authority even further. Fix this oversight!

CAPRICORN

DEC. 22-JAN. 19:

If you have ever fantasized about taking a pilgrimage to a wild frontier or sacred sanctuary or your ancestral homeland, the next ten months will be an excellent time to do it. And the best time to plan such an adventure will be the coming two weeks. Keep the following questions in mind as you brainstorm. 1. What are your life’s greatest mysteries, and what sort of journey might bring an awakening that clarifies them? 2. Where could you go in order to clarify the curious yearnings that you have never fully understood? 3. What power spot on planet Earth might activate the changes you most want to make in your life?

AQUARIUS

JAN. 20-FEB. 18:

When he died at the age of 77 in 1905, Aquarian author Jules Verne had published 54 books. You’ve probably heard of his science fiction novels Journey to the Center of the Earth and Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea. He was a major influence on numerous writers, including Jean-Paul Sartre, J. R. R. Tolkien, and Arthur Rimbaud. But one of his manuscripts never made it into book form. When he finished it in 1863, his publisher refused to publish it, so Verne stashed it in a safe. It remained there until his greatgrandson discovered it in 1989. Five years later, Verne’s “lost novel,” Paris in the Twentieth Century, went on sale for the first time. I suspect that in the coming months, you may have a comparable experience, Aquarius. An old dream that was lost or never fulfilled may be available for recovery and resuscitation.

PISCES

FEB. 19-MARCH 20:

“I enjoy using the comedy technique of self-deprecation,” says stand-up comic Arnold Brown, “but I’m not very good at it.” Your task in the coming weeks, Pisces, is to undermine your own skills at self-deprecation. You may think they are too strong and entrenched to undo and unlearn, but I don’t — especially now, when the cosmic forces are conspiring to prove to you how beautiful you are.

Cooperate with those cosmic forces! Exploit the advantages they are providing. Inundate yourself with approval, praise, and naked flattery.

September 3, 2015 71

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Dear Dan: I’m a foot-fetish guy who split up with my girlfriend of four years. She was into all the foot stuff, and we got into lots of other kinks. My concern is about meeting new women. I’m worried I’m not going to be able to perform for vanilla sex. I feel almost doomed to being solo unless I meet someone who is into the same stuff I am. I was able to do vanilla with my ex, but I don’t know if I can do vanilla stuff with other girls. Do you have any advice on what I can do to change my mind-set? Is it possible for me to perform vanilla activities if I am present and relaxed with a girl?

— Just Asking You

SAVAGE

by Dan Savage

— Don’t Attack This Adulterer Dear DATA: Slogging through the Savage Love mail for the last 25 years has convinced me of this: Some married people have grounds to cheat. Men and women trapped in sexless or loveless marriages, men and women who have been abandoned sexually and/or emotionally by

Love

spouses they aren’t able to leave — either because their spouses are economically dependent on them (or vice versa) or because they may have children who are dependent on both partners. It would be wonderful if everyone who felt compelled to cheat could either negotiate an open relationship or end the one they’re in now, but there are cases where cheating is the

least worst option for all involved.

Now, I don’t know the particulars of DATA’s marriage — why it’s been sexless for so long, what the damage is — but if seeking sex elsewhere allowed DATA to stay sane and stay married, and if the marriage is otherwise affectionate and low-conflict, and if DATA’s wife didn’t want to see her marriage end, DATA may have done her a favor by getting on Ashley Madison. Loyalty isn’t something we can demonstrate only with our genitals.

Send questions to mail@savagelove. net and follow @fakedansavage on Twitter

Dear JAY: You told your last girlfriend about your kink, JAY, and you can tell your next girlfriend about it. Act like it’s no big deal — “I have a thing for feet” — because… it’s no big deal. But if you’re too shy to say anything, or you’re afraid of being dumped by a girl who’s a footfetish-phobe (you should be in a hurry for those girls to dump you), there’s only one way to find out if you can perform vanilla activities with a new girl: give it a try.

Dear Dan: I had an Ashley Madison account. But I did not create “my” account.

Anyone can register an account using anyone’s e-mail address, and deleting fake accounts costs money. Now my e-mail address is on a public database of AM users.

People with accounts on AM are victims of the hackers, which you thankfully addressed in your last column. But members — actual and fake — were first victims of Ashley Madison. Shitty security aside, AM is a hub of extortion: no e-mail verification, pay-todelete (not that your account is actually deleted!), and tons of fake accounts purporting to be women (to balance the real, paying accounts from men). My happily monogamish wife and I use OkCupid and FetLife, which helped us find our way to local swinger and BDSM clubs. There are websites that aren’t reliant on fake users and extortion to build and then entrap a user base.

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Dear FAME: Thanks for sharing, FAME.

Dear Dan: I’m one of the men caught in the Ashley Madison hacker net.

But as pissed as I am about the bullshit — the company’s lies about the security of its site, the hackers’ self-righteous moralizing — I can attest to the fact that one can get what one is looking for on that site. Yes, there were a lot of fake profiles.

Yes, there were a lot of pros. Yes, there were women looking to steal your identity. Seriously. But once you figured out the game, you could find a lot of real women on that site who were looking for someone to spend time with. I’ll be pissed if I get busted as a result of all of this, but joining that site helped me reclaim my sanity after a sexless 25-year marriage.

Boulder Weekly

September 3, 2015 73

EEDBETWEENTHELINES

by Leland Rucker

Using actual evidence to discuss cannabis

A

s more states and countries begin to engage in the issues associated with marijuana prohibition, it’s important that lawmakers and citizens alike have the best possible information to be able to make wise decisions in public policy and in our everyday lives.

We don’t know everything about cannabis yet. After decades of inactivity in the U.S., it needs serious, objective study. That said, it’s pretty frustrating to see some of the often-repeated crap being produced on the subject today. In too many cases, it appears that the difference between “causality” and “link between” aren’t part of the journalistic pallet anymore. If there’s a link, there is cause.

That’s why I’m encouraged by a recent series of reports released by the International Centre for Science in Drug Policy, and I urge everyone interested in the subject to read at least the summary if not the entire report. The group of scientists investigated the 13 most repeated claims on cannabis use and then tried to determine if there were evidence to back them up. What they indicate is that there is little verification to back up most of the declarations that have become almost rote fact by now from sheer repetition.

Number one on my own list is that cannabis can lower your IQ by up to eight points. I see this one constantly, especially when the discussion centers around youth and marijuana use. It’s a horrifying suggestion designed specifically to evoke the fear of god in a parent. But what the researchers found is that scientific evidence that suggests cannabis use is associated with declines in IQ is lacking.

As it turns out, almost all the headlines refer to one 2012 study that used an earlier study “to test the association between persistent cannabis use and neuropsychological decline and determine whether decline is concentrated among adolescent-onset cannabis users,” according to the abstract.

Now writing a news story or headline that states that anything lowers IQ based on one study is problematic, but in this case, it’s especially so. Even the study’s author urged caution in interpretation. A tiny sample (38 people, representing 3.7 percent of the total study) doesn’t really come up to the level of “Cannabis Destroys Brain Power and Lowers IQ” (Daily Mail) or “Study Shows Heavy Adolescent Pot Use Permanently Lowers IQ” (Forbes). (And what the hell is “brain power” and how is it quantified, anyway?)

Researchers trying to duplicate the same experiment a year later found that the earlier study hadn’t taken other socio-economic factors into account. The researchers also found a recent, larger study that found that alcohol use was associated with declines in IQ. “Our findings suggest cannabis may not have a detrimental effect on cognition, once we account for other related factors, particularly cigarette and alcohol use,” said researcher Claire Mokrysz of her 2013 attempt at duplication. “This may suggest that previous research

findings showing poorer cognitive performance in cannabis users may have resulted from the lifestyle, behavior and personal history typically associated with cannabis use, rather than cannabis use itself.”

Another one I come across a lot is that cannabis use impairs cognitive function.

On this one the results were inconclusive: The researchers found studies that offered moderate evidence that early onset and sustained use is associated with impairments and cognitive function but also found gaps in the evidence on the full range of effects.

“Given the current state of the scientific research, the simple assertion that cannabis leads to reduced cognitive function is misleading,” they write. “It’s also noteworthy that a systematic review of all longitudinal scientific studies on this topic found that the evidence did not support a causal relationship between cannabis use by young people and various psychosocial harms.”

Another big claim I read about a lot and is currently listed on the SAM (Smart Approaches to Marijuana) website is that cannabis use, according to founder Kevin Sabet, “can result in serious, long-term consequences, like schizophrenia.”

The researchers found some studies that point to a link between cannabis use and “the risk of symptoms associated with schizophrenia” and a more recent one that came to the opposite conclusion.

And, they note, if cannabis “caused” schizophrenia, we would be seeing those increases in the population as cannabis use rose, but that has not been the case.

Research suggests that young people predisposed to schizophrenia may have their risk increased by using cannabis. That’s hardly the same as Sabet’s dire warning.

Lesson: If you’re interested, read all you can about cannabis, but be skeptical of everything, too.

You can hear Leland discuss his most recent column and Colorado cannabis issues each Thursday morning on KGNU. http://news.kgnu.org/weed

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10th

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Hours Mon-Fri 9-6:45pm Sat/Sun 10-6:45pm Recreational Medical 720.476.6186 303.444.1564

9th

As it turns out, Americans are still confused about the wheat protein gluten despite the mass marketing of gluten-free products plastered all over grocery stores and restaurants. According to a recently released survey by NSF International, only 35 percent of Americans can correctly identify gluten while 47 percent think the protein is found in rice and another 34 percent think gluten is found in potatoes. Nope.

News flash: Gluten is not a starch of the weight-gaining variety that Dr. Atkins warned us of several decades ago.

Gluten is, however, found in some, but not all grains, including wheat, rye and barley as well as in every day consumables such as soy-sauce, salad dressing and beer. This is noteworthy given half the survey participants didn’t think so.

Add this to the fact that 46 percent of Americans say their first step in identifying gluten-free products is looking at the ingredients label and saying, “Ehh, that looks like it could be gluten-y.”

So basically we have half the population attempting to eat gluten-free by incorrectly identifying what gluten is and then consuming products accordingly.

Stop jumping on the latest food-craze train, America. Let’s not be Mean Girls’ famous moron Karen Smith (“Is butter a carb?”) Do your research before throwing out half your pantry. Granted, while some do have real medical reasons to be running from bread, most of the rest of us are fine. Go eat a hamburger with a white bun alongside battered French fries dipped in ranch dressing all washed down by a delicious hefeweizen. We promise, you’ll feel great.

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9th

The Boulder City Council gave first approval to an ordinance that would outline how to enforce the city’s residence occupancy limits.

If approved, the ordinance would mandate that property owners post legal occupancy rules on properties and rental license applications. The maximum occupancy for unrelated tenants in Boulder is three or four people, depending on zoning.

It would also raise excess occupancy fines to $500 for a first offence, and $750 for a second offence.

Susan France Here are some other ways to enforce the occupancy limit of unrelated tenants that Boulder City Council rejected: In what was called the “Mayor Night-light” plan, Mayor Matt Appelbaum would count residents by kissing each person goodnight and tucking them into their beds. Sources say he’d be singing, “Hush, Little Baby,” and holding a flashlight to his face, and he’d smell like fresh brownies.

Another plan involved right-sizing people’s bedrooms, so that it would be physically impossible to fit more than three residents in a home. In this plan, the city would split bedrooms in two and turn one half into a bike lane.

Another plan involved intense, daily blood and semen testing administered by Chip, the CU mascot, to make sure residents in multi-person units are related.

Another plan involved orchestrating city-wide arranged marriages, while another involved mandatory surgery to inject Boulder’s single residents with dog DNA so that they wouldn’t technically be human and subject to the housing requirement.

It is worth noting that a two-year long study session is being done on the “Chip” plan.

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